wellRED podcast - #125 - Sexist Air Conditioners and Gettin Your Bell Rung! w/ Carmen Morales!!

Episode Date: July 10, 2019

This week we had the EXTREME pleasure of being joined by friend of the podcast and hilarious comedian Carmen Morales!We discussed whether or not air conditioning was sexist, concussions in football, and why you shouldn't take jokes too seriously To follow all of Carmen's goings ons, go to CarmenMorales.comFor tickets to our shows and to pick up our book and album, shoot on over to wellredcomedy.comSponsors this week:bluechew.com - Use promo code RED to try it for FREE (just pay 5 dollars shipping)MDRNCBD.com - use promo code RED to get 30% off and free shipping on THE BEST CBD products out thereRemember to leave us a review and a rating and tell your buddies to holler at the show! Love y'all like Chicken!

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion. Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie, I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say. Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know?

Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better, and it's called Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app

that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Rocket Money shows all your expenses in one place, including subscriptions you already forgot about. If you see a subscription, you don't want anymore, Rocket Money will help you cancel it. Their dashboard lays out your whole financial picture,

including the due dates for all your bills and the pay days. In a way that's easier for you to digest, you can even automatically create, custom budgets based on your past spending. Rocket Money's 5 million members have saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscription with members saving up to $740 a year when they use all of the apps. Premium features. I used Rocket Money and realized that I had apparently been paying for two different

language learning services that I just wasn't using. So I was like, I should know Spanish. I'll learn Spanish. and I've just been paying to learn Spanish without practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that. Also, a fun one, I'd said it before, but I got an app,

lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friends' faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball-looking twin fellas. Yeah, so that was money. What was that a reply gift for?

Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten. If it wasn't for Rocket Money, I never would have even figured it out. So shout out to them. They help.

If you're money dumb like me, Rocket Money can help. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney. dot com slash well read today that's rocket money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast. They're the. What's going on everybody?

It's your boy the show. Wellred comedy.com. W-E-L-R-E-D comedy.com. That is where you can find tickets to our 2019 tour. We are going to be in Asheville, North Carolina this weekend at the Orange Pill. There's a couple tickets left for the late show on Saturday and Sunday. It's getting close to selling out. So grab those.

You can also grab some sweet fucking merch. We've got T-shirts and tank tops and hats. Our book, The Liberal Redneck Manifesto, Dragon Dixie Out of the Dark, our brand new album, well-read, live from Lexington. I think we got posters and stuff on there. There's a bunch of cool shit. we're taking a break after Asheville to get some R&R before the tour really kicks up a gear

and then we'll be heading to Little Rock, Arkansas, Traverse City, Michigan, Detroit, Michigan. I'm not looking at a list here. I'm trying to just go off the top of my head, so make sure to go to well-redcomedy.com to see everything. Also, we're going to be in Austin, Texas, San Antonio, Texas, Houston, Texas, Dallas, Texas,

San Diego, California. We're going to be in Madison, Wisconsin. And then after that, I'm drawing a blank, but I know that our 2019 tour will come to an end at our homecoming shows at the greatest comedy club in the country, Zanis, in Nashville. So just go to our website, grab all those tickets. This portion of the podcast, of course, is brought to you by Carbvodka.com. Go to Carvodka.com and check out what the fuss is about Jacksonville's first and only, craft vodka distillery. Also, smokyboysgrilling.com.

Go to smokyboysgrilling.com to get all the rubs for all your meats. We have a special guest on the podcast this week. Friend of the podcast, she's been on before to rave reviews. So, of course, we had her back. One of my longtime friends in comedy, Miss Carmen Morales. We're going to talk about comedy and football and concussions and boners. and the systemic sexism of air conditioners. All sorts of good stuff.

So tune in. We love you like chicken. And we will see you next time. Ski-you. Well, well. Well, here we are. We're at the studio. Corrie's at home.

Here we are. The standard week. Well, you know, let's go ahead and get into it, Drew, right now. What do we get into, baby? So, I almost bought a Jeep. Office women are called. across this country. Yes.

And I think, what are we going to do about it? Nothing. Put a coat on. Right. Okay. But, well, I think we should probably address what, what we're talking about. Yeah, yeah. It went fairly,

yeah, and it's gotten spread around quite a bit. I've seen it pop up on Reddit and stuff. So, I mean, it's like out there, but obviously not everybody listening will know what we're talking about. So yes, there was initially a New York Times article about how, and the article's main point or premise was that climate control and office buildings is inherently biased towards men, like the standards that they use for temperature and all that in office buildings is geared towards dudes and women are not considered. And this leads to women, you know, being cold and uncomfortable at work all the time, which is bullshit, which like, I think that there's like,

I can see where that's coming from, and I believe that's probably mostly true because I've worked in an office and I can sort of vouch for that. But the main thing that went like viral that every time I see it, it's the same thing. A different woman, not the woman who wrote the article, a different woman shared the article on Twitter and in sharing it, she tweeted about it. I've been saying for you, and I'm paraphrasing, I've been saying for years that air conditioning is oppressive and sexist and, you know, I've been uncomfortable in offices my whole life, whatever, and it ends with hashtag ban AC. So like, here's the thing. That's dumb. Right. A lot of people went after her saying that was bullshit and I, including me, because the underlying point of that article, like I said,

said, I can see like validity to that, but taking that and saying it's oppressive and sexist and we should outlaw air conditioning. I mean, that is fucking ridiculous. Can we stop? We can't. We can't. But can we stop, for the sake of argument, could we stop having these conversations based upon what the most insane, stupid people say? Right. Because when I tweeted what I tweeted, which was just like, hey, calling air conditioning sexist ain't that wild of a tweet.

ain't that wild of a take like women are always cold and men always control it i hadn't seen that lady's tweet i didn't see it till you sent it to me but well cori corey actually is the one who shared it but on text or our group text yeah but before that i kept seeing all these oh air conditioned sexist next they'll be saying windows or whatever and i'm like in my head what i thought was that no one said air conditioning was sexist someone said that men control in the air condition and is sexist. And I fall on the side of put a coat on because I can't take all my clothes off.

Exactly. But I understand the other side of the argument of, fuck you, every office is controlled by me, whatever. You know, I get that. So I'm seeing that. And then I'm, like, responding to people

that I know and respect, like, you really, I mean, come on, this is stupid. Like, the way air condition is controlled is probably a little sexist. Let's just make the... And now I realize we were fighting over different things. Yeah. Yes. And that's annoying.

Right. Can we stop doing that? Why, this is a problem with rednecks, too. This is a big basis of your whole career. Why do we all have to be judged by the worst versions of ourselves? Yeah. Well, even if, though, by the way, even if the lady never called it sexist or whatever, the fact that, the fact remains that, like, yeah, it's, I mean, hell, it's a trope in television shows.

Sometimes I talk about, you know, the cold secretary at the office. Like, it's a thing we've known for a long time. I mean, the other option is is that all the dudes are just going to be burning the fuck up and they can't do anything about it. Because they have to wear suits to work every day.

And according to a lot of our followers, the fat ladies too. Yes. That was said to me. Yeah. But yes, but I'm saying that if you said that in my opinion

to most people who are like, nah, turn it down or up. That's another thing. I know. Do we turn air down or up? You turn, the way I use it. But I agree that it's... You turn it down to make it colder. Air.

You turn the air down to make it colder. Actually, I don't even know because I was going to say... I stay saying, turn that air up. I'm hot. Actually, I take that back. I say that heat down. Turn the heat down. If you're hot, and it's wintertime, turn the heat down.

If you're hot and it's summertime you're inside, turn the air up. Yeah. I mean, that makes sense to me, but I have heard it the other way. Yeah, because you actually turn the... That makes it hotter. Because you turn the thermostat down. Right. Which cranks the air up.

So, you know. Well, I was trying to say is I agree with you, Corey. But if I didn't, or if there's people out there who don't, who are like, man, men can be hot a little bit. It's like, that's a different conversation than air conditioning is sexist. Of course. And I'm just... Of course it isn't. Tired of...

I mean, I'm guilty of it, too. Everybody's guilty of it. of it. We're judging each other based upon the loudest, shittiest representation of the group. Now, I generally agree with... Go ahead, Corey. Well, I was going to say, I will say this.

The person that I saw share that article was Ian Carmel, who you know, much like us, left of linen, and the way he phrased it on Twitter was like, you know, essentially something like you said, Tray, like my eyes just rolled so far in the back of my head. And when I checked the comments just

on that particular ladies, tweet right and left were both reaching across the aisle to tell her she was fucking stupid. And that's what I was about to say is like I generally agree with your point, Drew, about we're judging, like, we judge groups of people based on the worst examples of them. I mean, black people tell you all about that shit. But like, it's definitely a real thing. But in this particular instance, the only thing that I contributed to it was I retweeted that specific tweet that most other people

were retweeting and made fun of that like not the just the idea of the article yeah not the article or the idea that might be sexist this one woman said a outlandish thing in my opinion and I

called it outlandish and I don't think that's the same thing but I think when you first tweeted it didn't you think she wrote the article no I looked at the article before I tweeted anything the reason I asked that is I think most people assume that that's what I'm saying like I hear you I realize that you were just making fun of that one woman but it became a thing I mean it was trending on Twitter I know yeah so even if everyone who sent that was making

fun of that one woman a lot of people and I was one of these people reading about it thought well this has become something other than what it was a big debate right and it's not there was a different debate going on and even that one was pretty one-sided yeah I don't know if she commented on it or not but I would imagine the woman who actually did write that article was probably not too thrilled with how that all went down because you're right. No, probably not. The context with which it went viral was specifically through this other woman's take on it, which is not what the author said. And then it became, and most people, you're right, not me, because I read it and saw that it wasn't the same person, but most people or a lot of people, I'm sure, saw that and just assumed that it was all the same person. like that she wrote the article and this is what she thinks or whatever.

Ariel is black, that thing. Yeah. Most of the people, it's come out, not, I don't know if it's most. I shouldn't say that because I don't know it. A lot of bots were tweeting that Ariel should be white just to stow up bullshit. Right. And that's what, that's like another point I'm getting at is like sometimes the response to the bullshit take. It's like, eight people believe that.

You know, we're, and now we're having this huge fight. And then our worst eight people go out there and say, I can't think of a good example because the aerial should not be, what am I trying to say? The aerial should be why argument is so stupid. I'm having a hard time coming up with a ridiculous counter example. But my point is like, hey, come on in here. Yo. Hi. I can't say nothing.

Who's here? Carmen Morales in the house. Friend of the podcast. Hi. She can't hear you yet, Corey. Hang on. She's about to be on mic. She's about to be on mic.

her uh welcome hello hi guys hey hey hey this is rad yeah welcome hey we're talking about women in their opinions in their opinions oh jesus christ another broad that wants to be heard i'm tired of it huh yeah these fucking bitches won't shut up mouth they wanted but they wonder why that's what that's why that's why i don't get anything because they're not going to nag your way into progress that's not how it works all right how does it work violence big fan i'm a big fan of why i'm a big fan of Violence for progress. Which thing in particular are you guys talking about? They're cold in the office.

Do you know what I'm talking about? I mean, that's the entire, but that's the entire, that's the entire reason why feminism doesn't work, or young feminism. This fourth wave is like, it's a group, a room full of women who are like, it's cold in here, but nobody wants to change the fucking thermostat. We're in it now. They probably all grew up with dads who, you know,

start taking the belt off of anybody got within five feet of the thermostat. or whatever, you know what I'm like I did. I fought my dad when I was 17. Yeah. And that was the day I became a man. So. Hi, Corey. We kind of moved on to the aerial being.

How you doing, man? Hey, what's happening to you, man? You buy a house and now you're a fucking chef. You got to blow it, put it in everybody's face. He never cooked before, did he? I know. We talked about this the last time I was on. I basically had to feed this man, so we didn't eat out of a fucking 7-Eleven kiosk.

And now all of a sudden, he's a little bit. The 7-Eleven kiosk is where they have like some of the meats and the snacks. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. In my mind, a kiosk is only at the mall, but you're right. It can be in a 7-Eleven. He still loves that. I was like, there's a mall with a 7-Eleven in the middle of it. I'm sorry.

That was me. Yes, there is a Persian woman who's trying to give you a niece seeds to put on your asshole or something, some kind of cream. I don't know what it is. I only want nephews, but, um. But yeah, no. You're stupid. I know. Corey's

Yeah, he's full of shit for sure. He still loves those 7-11 kiosk though just for the record. He hasn't, he ain't changed that much. But yeah, I know you're talking about all his like, his like Instagram style. I get it,

Corey, you got a lot of free time. You got a lot of free time to learn another trade. I get it. We kind of moved on and talking about Ariel being black. But really we were talking about is, do you feel like,

and you know whatever yes or no we're kind of like fighting with each other based upon the worst version of each group not just politics everything like everything that comes out on social media like the eight loudest biggest assholes become each side you see way more people shitting on

that take than you see people actually having that opinion when it came out and I was like all these people and I was like what people I actually I haven't heard anybody really like especially not anybody that's listening who's to them. Somebody outside of

a guy on Twitter that has nine followers aside from that guy. Fuck that guy. First of all, fuck that guy. But who cares? Yes, that's what I mean. That's what I mean. I don't mean like, fuck you, dude. Just because there is a platform doesn't mean that he has a platform. If he doesn't have anybody to yell at, but the nine people that agree with him, who

gives his shit what he's saying? Right. You know what I mean? Are we talking, we're talking about Ariel right now? Yeah. Yeah. I know it's anything, but I'm just making sure. I heard way more people be like, oh, these fucking people that are against Ariel being black and I was like

Who legit is a It's the same kind of people When anytime they do anything in any Marvel movie It's like all these fucking nerds And it's like yeah they're fucking nerds They care more about the thing than they should Yeah It's weird

Yeah it is weird And who gives a fuck if Ariel's black bro It's all fantasy dude It's not real It probably did catch a lot of shit at the time And I've just forgotten now Or the world is forgotten But like there really wasn't that type of thing

with like Hamilton, right? And is it because those people don't fuck with theater? Yes. They just don't know anything about theater. Nobody does. Like that's going to start next week. They're like, hold on, wait a minute.

They didn't get past the Broadway part. And they were like, this is gay. It's coming through Memphis this weekend. I was about to say those people think that every single person on Broadway is queer so they don't care if they're Puerto Rican. Right. Yeah. Yeah.

But it's also like, like, they don't go to the theater. They don't do it like that's the thing. and whoever is bitching about Ariel being black was never going to go see the movie. Right. So it doesn't matter. You know how you combat that? Yeah. And I think Disney did it to drum up controversy.

Probably. I mean, who made those box? Who the fuck made those bots? And they've proven like, there's like a bunch of them. But Russians. God damn. I'm kind of serious, though.

Yeah, they did. They don't have a specific. I mean, they're all they, they're like mission with all that shit is just to, keep us all pissed off and right yeah to stir the pot and they'll do it with anything they'll do it from the right or the left and they'll do it with like any type of story like i got an uncle who's been saying that about our government and rich people literally his whole life you know like their whole goal is to keep us fighting with each other you know what i mean i think there's something to that i think there's something to that too especially with rich people it is our it's our it's our fucking

government outsourcing it to the goddamn russian so that they can have somebody to point at when really it's their idea in the first place to keep us all arguing about fucking mundane bullshit while they take our goddamn rights away and we look the other way because some fucking fish lady is black Cho's crack the code hot take Corey look out show the American government has outsourced to the Russians we would definitely have hired an Indian to do the computer job just based on this administration because that's what you would think that's what they want you to think they do want you to think that's what everybody around the that's what everybody around the world saying they're like no hell our government couldn't do that they'd get a goddamn indian

to do it and so boom flip the script well man you solved it well i'm glad we're done now what we talk about you want to go back to broads let's work on that well that we ain't got seven hours we could talk about the soccer broads i'm proud of them i'm proud of it's pretty right i think we won the world cup that's cool i'm glad the u.s has finally started uh you know fucking with soccer or like the rest of the world has. They'll stop. They'll, like, this has happened with the World Cup before,

the men and the women, because our women are always good, thankfully, and our men are not. But either way, I feel like every time there's either World Cup, America starts giving a shit about soccer.

And then it ends. And it goes away. Not goes away completely. It's way bigger now than it has ever been. Orlando, like they have like, they even have second. tier soccer where before they really didn't have that.

Orlando though, correct me if I'm wrong, they like, they got really into that club, right? When it came in. Atlanta is doing it now too. Columbus is that to it. Yeah, yeah. It's like, it is like a legit building. But, like, so, Chattanooga. Nashville, it's huge here.

Nashville got super, super into hockey as the predators got good, but like Tennessee don't give a shit about hockey for the most part still. Like, I mean, a little bit more. Obviously, soccer's growing, and that hits for me, too. I'm very on board with it. I'm just saying, like, I feel like... It's okay if you don't like soccer. You could just say that.

It's up and down. Do you know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah. Like, the bandwagoning. It's bam waggingy, yeah. But just for an entire sport for whenever. Right. Well, because it's a World Cup, but there's only one team.

I also think it's growing, especially among women. And a lot of that has to do. I mean, it's so funny. It was Title IX. Like, Title IX was like this rule. If a college gives out this number of male scholarships, they got to give out the same number of female scholarships. Right.

And then the big argument was like, well, fucking, there's no female football. Like, that's 80 scholarships. How the fuck do we make? Well, they play. They don't even play things. They don't even play stuff. How are we supposed to give them scholarships to play things?

They don't even play things. So there was a shitload of soccer programs. If they start giving out, if they start giving out crochet scholarships, now we're fucking talking. Oh, my mom. These bitches be knitting all the time. They just be knitting. Yeah.

My mom will get so many scholarships. She would get them all. She would get into Yale for knitting. Yeah. Give me a collage scholarship. I got a great scrapbook. Collage scholarship. That's hilarious.

Yeah. That's how poor people pay for school. Just a collage of scholarship. I heard your daughter. I got $500 from the Rotary Club. I heard your daughter got a scholarship. You go to college? No, no, no.

To collage. I got a collage. Oh, is that French? That sounds even better. That's a French-ass name. Is that a French college? Anyway, overnight there was all these fucking soccer programs And I think that that culture, it's, look, unfortunately, it's all for the most part kids with money

But it's here to stay. They fucking love it in like Farragut. These are places outside of Knoxville. Like suburbs of Knoxville, they fucking love it, especially the girls' teams. A couple things. A, soccer literally did not exist in Salina when I was a kid. They still don't. Some, right, son.

Well, they have it in Salina now. You want to kick a ball. You do that on your own goddamn time. Yeah. They have soccer programs and stuff in Salina now. So that's one thing. But then also out here, and I think I mentioned this on here before, but still my sons played soccer. And in their soccer league, which is that ASO, the big one.

AISO. Yeah. American youth soccer organization. So they were in that. Their team had probably like between 10 and 12 kids on it or something, maybe even 15. And there were, I don't even know how many teams in the league, like at least. 10, right? And this is just for six and seven year olds and it's the same for

every age group and it's localized. It's just here in Burbank. So hundreds of kids playing soccer, right? My oldest son played flag football this last year and there were four teams and each team had exactly enough kids to like field a flag

football team. There was less than 30 kids total who played football and from a larger age range too, like from like five to eight or something. Q all your high school friends. Are you cool with letting your kids play football?

No. It was flag and he asked and so I was like, that's fine, but not the like tackle football? Yeah, the real football. Because it beats their brains up, you know. Like it's, we know a lot of shit now about football

that we didn't know when we were kids and it just like makes me uncomfortable as a parent. It freaks me out. Yeah, I hear that too. Gore, you still there? Yeah, I'm here. Is that? So y'all all hear that also, right?

Sorry, Corey, you may have to cut this out. Do you hear that, Corey? Yeah, 24 minutes. It's kind of like a little tiny humming maybe. I mean, it's pretty shitty sounding, honestly. Like, if it's going to be in the actual recording, it's going to... Yeah, I can't tell if it's... Are you talking about how...

Hey, are you talking about how I sound? I can't tell. Yeah, I don't know where it's coming from. It just stopped. Wait, it just stopped. Because I'm... Did you do a thing? Because I'm recording on a separate mic, so if it's just me, then it's fine.

Whatever happened just stopped. Did you change anything about what you were doing just now? No. No, I'm just sitting here on my handy recorder with my headphones on. I'm going to take two and just ask you that question again. All right. Yeah. Ready?

You ready, Corey? Yeah, I'm so ready. I'm doing it. Are you cool with your? kids playing football like like touch football like for real football well that touch is not for real i'm talking about tackle yeah yeah full contact yeah uh no like i so i grew up in salina you know played football poorly but everybody played football me and all my friends and i always you did everything poorly am i right yeah yeah that's right poverty joke poverty joke never don't hit um uh yeah i always just assumed

very much. If I had sons one day, they'll play football and it's going to be awesome. And then, but in the intervening years, we've learned a lot of shit about football and the effects that it can have. And my kids actually exist now and are real in the world. And so now I'm like, I don't want them smashing their heads into shit all day. Well, we don't have to go to the NFL, but I mean, you played football. You're fun. Yeah, but there are some studies that indicate that like that those like effects on your brain can start that you can play just in junior high and high school and not

beyond that and still get lingering effects of that type of shit. I mean, right? Am I wrong? No, he's completely right. No, you're not wrong. Robbie Lee sent me that article. He was actually using it to explain the chain, because I mean, I talk about my buddy Rob on here all the time. Rob, when he was

in fucking middle school and high school, was like the most, you know, straight-aid, didn't want to drink, didn't want to have you know, sex because it was wrong. completely straight-laced human being. And then, like, and he also played football and started hitting. Now he's cool. He's cool.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's true. But, like, he had a lot of personality changes. And he started reading all this shit. And he was like, God damn, man, I think I've got CTE.

And basically, it was, if you've played competitive football, basically, if you started in sixth grade and played through high school, like, just that amount of time, that's enough to have very long. lasting, like especially if you played a lot and especially out defense or something, which he did, he was an end. So like, you know, Rob was constantly putting his head in there and getting his ass whooped. You can, just that age range, you can have long lasting CTE effects. I also anecdotally have buddies that I played with who like ones that got multiple concussions back then, which, you know, we also didn't have concussions yet. Yeah.

They got their bell rung a lot, you know. and like I've thought before that I you know that I think that it has had an effect on them I'm fucked I've had three major ones like gotta go to the hospital I don't remember the whole day I've probably had I counted one time I got to like 12

I played two years in college shit yeah like there was one that I remember my sophomore year I went over the middle and got fucked up and I couldn't remember what to line up on the next play like it was like pro right and I was the offside receiver so I'm supposed to just line up on the left off the line of scrimmage that's all pro right means is that I go left it's not the play it's just the formation I knew what pro left meant and couldn't figure out what pro right meant and I remember making me

mad that I knew what pro left meant and I could figure out what pro right meant and at the dance that night afterwards I still couldn't figure out what pro right meant and that wasn't a major one that was just like one that I remember where at the time like you said tray I didn't think I have a concussion I was like I was probably slapping my head what's wrong this damn thing. Let me hit it again. Just trying to fons of your brain into working.

You're treating your brain like a fucking vending machine. I was trying to get the kick out. I used to have, like I was like a good student or whatever and I had a good memory. Like I would just study, memorize shit and then that's,

my memory's not good. And sometimes I think it's the pot because I went through about five years of just every day and sometimes I think it's the concussions. It's probably a combo. It could be. I'm sure the pot didn't help.

Yeah. Yeah, it's both. It is both. It's both. Two laughs. But, you know, yeah, Carmen, I'm a huge fan. I mean, I've been a huge fan growing up and still am. I love watching college and professional football.

There's lots of things that you can be a fan of that you don't want your kids to do, though. Strippers, porn stars, football players, stand-up comedy, acting, accounting, lawyer, cop, politician. Wrestling, almost anything. No, I want my nephews to be wrestlers. Are they six nine? That's the only way you can do it now. It is a different culture now. It's a different culture now.

I mean, he's very, he's big and athletic. He's fat, but he's funny. He can be a manager. That's a great wrestler. That's a great, nine. He can sit, dude. Dusty road, baby, the great American dream. Do you think that's like,

I'm dying with kings and queens and I've passed out on pork and beans? Corey's doing this thing. A hit. Corey's also had a few concussion. Do you think, do you think that's, like, hypocritical of me? like to watch it and enjoy it. Well, how are you going to get players if morally opposed to it? I think football's in trouble long term.

And I think soccer is also part of it. Now, I think a lot of kids in poorer areas are going to keep playing football for longer than other. And still, right now. I mean, that's the fucking golden ticket out. I know. Yeah, I'm not knocking that. But what if soccer becomes a ticket? Then what are they play?

And that's when things are really changing this country. And also, the reason that football is less popular than the NBA, there's a lot of reasons. You know, the fact that they have better superstars because you can see their face. Nike really pushed Jordan. That changed a lot of things. But a lot of it is that golden ticket thing. The NBA play, like Tobias Harris, do you know who that is?

Tobias Harris just made $180 million in five years. My mom has no clue who he is. Right. Except that he went to the University of Tennessee, so she actually probably does. I thought you were about to talk about how he, you know. He deserves it, but my point is he makes way, he makes almost as much money as Aaron fucking Rogers. Yeah, but a big part of that is also that like each roster is four times bigger. There's plenty of factors, but my point is like there's a lot of factors driving kids away from football.

And that's the other thing too with the concussions. Well, it doesn't help that the NFL fucking made it way, way less like safe, you know, like, because you used to not have to use your head as a goddamn weapon. You know what I mean? They're trying to change that back now, though. But that's what I'm saying is like, that's a huge thing with how the actual game is played. What's funny about that is that you're not supposed to spear people with your fucking head. But they actually, as they were like developing helmet technology and stuff, they were trying to make the helmets better. But what happened was guys started using their heads a lot more when they now have, you know, a turtle shell over it.

I can just slam it into people more than they used to when they had just the leather deals. Yeah. Rugby's way less hard on players over time than football. But head injuries in rugby, when they are serious, are super serious because they're not wearing a fucking helmet, like accidents. So in football, I was like, what do you say? Yeah. You're like, hey, let's make these helmets good so accidents don't happen. And then Ronnie Locke comes along and says, hey, hey, I could just stab people with my head.

Exactly. Yeah, exactly. that on his gravestone. Ronnie Lott, I could just stab people with my head. He cut a finger off to finish a game one time. Yep. But what's funny though, is like they have, they're making all

these rule changes. Every year there's more rule changes that are supposed to be geared towards player safety. And I mean, most of them make sense from that perspective. There are so many, like, old school diehard football fans who see that every year. And they're like, it's the pusification of football. Like, they hate it.

They're like, you know, they're ruining the game. Well, they also don't have to spood feed a grown man because he used his head as a weapon. No, I'm for it. Yeah, I'm talking to that guy. I'm not talking to you. But it's just, it is weird because, like, you do, if you love the sport enough, you should still want people to play it. Or, like, because maybe your kid now won't be able to have the love. Because a lot of, most of, like, the NFL played at one point, you know, like, most people that love football that are fucking super fans at.

some point in their life they played because yeah you know what I mean and if you never have that then there's like if they're not playing like that thing I said earlier about the soccer their soccer league was huge and the football league was tiny like that also yeah that just means that they're not going to be interested in it you know what I mean as much football as a sport they're just not going to like dig it may I ask it a different way would are you willing to let go of the NFL and football being what it is if your kids and other kids aren't playing like because I feel like you might be. Like, her point, I think, is that, like,

it's not necessarily that you're a hypocrite. You just have to realize that if you don't let them play and other parents aren't letting them play, the NFL's going to go away. Are you okay with that? I do realize that. Yeah, I mean, I'm not. That's why I thought.

Like, I don't want, if you told me this, if you, right, if you told me this season was canceled out of nowhere, I'd be, you know, that would really suck. But, like, if that is what actually happens, parents stop letting their kids play football because they're worried about their safety, and then ultimately that means football just dies out. I mean, yeah, it's just March of Progress, baby.

Yeah, I mean, I feel like watching the Gladiators was probably rad. Oh, I'm sure it was right. Oh, dude, I wish that was, I mean, come on. It should be like an alternative to like a life sentence. Like, first of all, we need to get rid of fucking three, you know, three-time felon bullshit for live drug offenses. But if we're not going to get rid of it, people should be able to opt in to be a gladiator. Yeah, let me fight a line.

And if you beat a line, you get to go back to selling drugs. It's legal for you for the rest of your life. I mean, I don't know about for the rest of your life, but you should be able to do 10 years or five years, depending on how badass you were in the trial. No, you should just get out. What are you talking about? I think you should get out, but you could still be re-arrested for it.

Oh, no, if you're selling drugs. It depends on the drug. Nah. What do you mean? Nah. If you're getting people strung out on heroin, I'm pro-legalizing all drugs. Of course it's not cool, but, like,

we let people get away with it all the time. I mean, literal. billionaires are made in this, I mean, families. The Purdue family is a family of billionaires for getting people strung out on oxycotton, which is just heroin. No, I know. Okay. But they're not the ones getting, we're not arresting them.

I know, we should be. But I'm saying I'm for legalizing selling drugs. Yes, I am for that. I agree with you, actually. Do you know what a great alternative to painkillers is, guys? It is CBD, and there is no better CBD. company out there than modern CBD. That is MDRNCBD.com. Guys, CBD is known to help with pain relief, anxiety, and sleep. And modern CBD is my trusted

resource for hemp-derived CBD products. The team at Modern CBD curates the best CBD products from only the most reputable brands. All modern CBD products have passed strict quality control procedures and have been tried by Modern's team of CBD experts. Guys, so the people over at Modern are sponsored for the podcast this week sent us just a plethora of CBD products and I've been using them for the past week and I am extremely happy with the results. My sleep has been better. My anxiety has been better.

I've been in a better mood. And also the thing that they sent me that I love the most was a big ass bag of gummies. They're huge. they do the trick and I get to eat gummies and guilt-free. I mean, there's still calories in them, but they're helping me in my mood. So, I mean, I got to eat them, right? Yeah, you never felt guilty about calories, baby. I gave my dog.

That was a very clever plug, by the way. I gave my dog some of... Corey Show biz and ass with two asses. I gave my dog some of the CBD that they sent us sincerely for the fireworks, and it helped him a lot. Like, he really calmed down. Yeah, I mean, I'd use it. farmer's food every morning.

As I've said before, I use it for like when my belly's acting up, you know, my IBS is flaring or whatever. I take CBD for that and it makes me feel better. It's non-psychoactive, but it has effects. If you don't feel good in a lot of different ways, it can make you feel a little better in those ways in my experience. Yeah, I think it's tremendous. And modern CBD is your go-to website for all CBD products.

You get free shipping on all orders. They only use the top selling brands that use full-grown hip. Hemp, not hip, full-grown hemp. Full-grown American hemp, Corey. American hemp. American, damn it. Yeah, you're right. It's 100% customer satisfaction guarantee.

Now, get your CBD products today from Modern CBD with a special offer for our listeners. go to M-D-R-N-C-B-D-com and enter our code red for 30% off your order, and shipping is free. You can't beat free. That's modern-cb-D-com, MD-R-N-C-B-D-com, rather, with code red for 30% off. So, guys, it's a free shipping, it's 30% off. If you've got anxiety like me, like Supreme... I mean, the guys can tell you, I'm a fucking nut case. but for the past week

I can attest to that for sure sure. Yeah, I've been using the the herbal drops, the tension I've been sticking it under my tongue and man, I've just been way more at ease.

I've been way more relaxed. I've gotten some work done. I felt good about myself. And I couldn't, I couldn't recommend it more. It's good stuff. It's full spectrum CBD. Go grab yours at mdrncbd.com.

It's also really rad. It's also really rad for like insomnia and stuff like that. That's been like a big help. Oh, yeah. Because I'm new to, I'm new to caffeine. I've only been on it for like six months. And then sometimes I'll have a coffee too late in the day.

And then I can't sleep. Yeah. And man, that CBD really helps. It does. Going to bed. I'm going to like, I'm keeping coke hours without doing coke. It's kind of a bummer. It is a bummer.

That ain't it. So you just now started drinking coffee? Yeah. Wow. I mean, I've been drinking iced tea forever, but I've never fucked with coffee until about six I had no, basically no caffeine intake at all ever pretty much until I, I mean, not really, because I quit drinking everything but water for the most part or booze if I was going to get drunk when I was in high school.

And so I only drank water and, you know, so I had no caffeine really at all until I had babies. And that was when I started. And then you're like, oh, I need more. Yeah, I got it. I understood it at that point. I had babies started doing uppers, gypsy's beep, bro. Got to.

So, back to drugs. We never really love drugs. No, we didn't. You're right. I agree with Drew, and it's a pretty radical position, I realize. But I think that, yeah, that drugs should be legalized and, like, regulated. And for the record, I would be super okay with it, though, if your plan went into effect instead. Like, I wouldn't be like, this is bullshit.

I wanted heroin, too. Like, if they came out tomorrow and they were like, everything. legal but crack coke and heroin i'd be like all right cool like that's really awesome so where do you stand on on all that um i don't i mean like i feel like you're seeing what heroin looks like legalized now and it's not good i mean they're calling it a crisis you know what i mean so it's like if we have it's just the same thing how like our food isn't regulated very well like so there's in tons of obese people everywhere that are literally just i mean like you're seeing people abuse a freedom, which is

you can consume however much you want. So having access to you know, to having opiates because they're giving them out like there's no fucking repercussions. Then you're seeing more and more people are getting strung out of it. So I do, I think like with it being

a, you're seeing a version of it being legal now. So it is legal because you can get it medicinally the same way like you could get a quote unquote medical card for marijuana. And it's like, it's not good. But it's also, this is a huge part of the whole story with the opioid crisis, is that like it's not just legal, but it's pushed. Or at least for a long time.

It was. Pushed on people. Now it's like very, in a very targeted fashion. And like doctors would just, you know, you like, you twist your ankle or whatever going. Your doctor gives you 30 oxies or whatever. That type of shit happened all the time. Dude, that happened to me. I ended up selling mine.

I was like, I'm not going to take all this. What are you crazy? A true capitalist, baby. But you knew, like there was a lot of people who. I don't think would have ended up in a world where heroin was legal on these drugs where they hurt their back and like, I mean, people where I'm from where I'm from, the doctor gave them to me. Therefore, they're fine. And then the next thing you know, you're turned upside down. But I will say it's pushed back the other way.

And this is another reason I'm pretty pro-legalization in general. It's pushed back the other way where there's such a stigma and they are going after doctors and they're doing all this stuff. I mean, there's a lot of people. But not really, dude. I mean, it's so hard, like, it's so hard to actually get a fucked up doctor in trouble. Like it's so hard. It is hard to get the doctor in trouble. Because they're all backed by those drug companies, so they'll throw in on the fucking attorneys and shit like that.

Like, it's a fucking scam. Well, usually what the drug companies do is they say, that doctor did it wrong. But you're right. It is hard, but they have started. And they've started what the doctors are doing because it was legal then. Because here's the thing. A lot of those doctors, they're assholes, but they never wanted to be a criminal. So they were pushing this stuff, and then all the rules changed, and they've changed so much that now the doctors are going,

I don't want to give it. I don't want to give it. And there's a lot of stories coming out of people who are in chronic pain who have never abused. They've never come in early. You know what I mean? Oh, two weeks early. I need more. And they can't get pain pills anymore.

And that's a problem. That's a big fucking problem. So when I say like regulated, I mean including the type of shit we do with like cigarettes and alcohol and stuff where it's like. Where there's a warning label and there's an age limit and there's a warning label and, you know, education and what. whatever, making sure people realize, like, the dangers with it, but you're never going to, you're never going to stop, you know, drug addicts from existing or whatever. Obviously, this wouldn't do that either, but I just don't, I don't think that it would, I don't think it would, like, make the drug problem explode or anything like that. I mean, you know, like, I mean, cigarettes were ubiquitous for years and years in this country. Yeah, you used to give them to your kids.

Yeah, yeah. Give them your kids. And they never got banned, but there's just been this, you know, campaign over years and years about the very real dangers of it. And cigarette, you know, tobacco use in general has plummeted. Yeah, but that's how, that's how many years. It took years and years and years for anything for it to lower. But they didn't know. I mean, I know it sounds crazy, but like they genuinely, they didn't understand the, like, true danger.

of tobacco and shit when it became this hugely popular thing that everybody did. That's not true. They've been talking about it since the fucking 50s. It was before that though. Yeah, that's true. I'm saying like before that like when it, you know, like the early, you know, 20th century or whatever before people, when, you know, people were using. Well, it's also been changed too because there's was less. Then you were just literally rolling up tobacco, just like pipe tobacco and smoking it, you know, which was way safer than what's. cigarettes became because there wasn't tar and there wasn't all these chemicals and all the tobacco was treated with a bunch of shit because they didn't give a fuck you know what i mean so cigarettes became even worse for you than they were even back then what i mean obviously you still shouldn't let your kids smoke cigarettes but you know what i mean like it became even more

and more poisonous the bigger and bigger cigarettes got yeah i just don't god damn but we already have that with heroin right we already have the worst of that and we have people behind bars for becoming addicts people behind bars for selling the same drugs that these other motherfuckers are getting billions off of and no one stopped doing it like i think that what we have now has created more addicts because of the for sure i totally agree because of the medical industry push yeah and i think that and it would have to be done correctly but i think that in a world where things are legalized but there is education about it it is regulated i think it's the best we can do i mean i'm not saying i'm not saying people won't be strung out on heroin i'm saying that a lot of those people

would have been strung out on something probably anyway it would also i agree with that and also they in that world people could there wouldn't they wouldn't be afraid they're going to go to prison or whatever that type of shit if they you know need help or assist yeah if they admitted it like it wouldn't have the same like our approach to drugs is just is is always been so barbaric that it's like you can't you can't just put somebody in a box and that's going to like so you it's it's it needs to be more rehabilitation. And we don't take any kind of precaution like that to people. Like people have to willingly walk in.

And like that's just not how addiction works. You know what I mean? Today's podcast sponsored by Passages, Malibu. God, I hate this fucking commercial so much. Are you rich and your family's tired of taking care of you? Come to a resort and sober up for a few weeks. I'm standing in front of a Maserati for no reason at all. Do you have a problem?

We'll solve all of it. I guarantee it. literally guarantees an infinity pool will fix all of you all of them i gotta be honest infinity pool would fix a lot of my problems carman that's not true i do not believe you it would actually you know i don't believe any of you it would uh it would uh what's the word make bigger well how can i think of that word expand biggin i believe yeah it would make bigger most of my problems exascerbate yeah that's not the word i was that's the only kind of like amplify amplify that's the word amplify that's the word Amplify.

I said that that's the only type of infinity that Drew's never had a problem with. Cori's got some gems in there. I go have a panic attack. Gems would all my best off my bones. Make sure you guys go have some CBD. It helps out with panic attacks. Make sure you guys go to what's the promo code? Hey, guys.

MDRNCBD.com promo code red. While we're on the note, do you know something that you don't have to have a prescription for, guys? I believe I've heard about. this. Yes. Blue Chew. Let's talk about sex and getting your dicks hard. Remember the days when you were always ready to go.

Well, now you can increase your performance. Days, weeks, months. Minutes. What was that? It was a double hit. You said, remember the days when you could always get hard? I said days, weeks, months, and Carmen said minutes. I heard that.

I missed it. Well, bluechew.com, that's like, that's blue, like the color blue, Blue Chewable brings you the first chewable with the same FDA-approved active ingredients as Viagra and Cialis. So you know they work. You can take them any time, day or not, even on a full stomach. And since they're chewable, they work up to twice as fast as a pill. So you can be ready whenever the opportunity arises. Corey, I believe you've taken these out.

You've taken your blue chewed dick out for a test dick in, ain't you? Yes. I did. in Branson, Missouri. Well, tell us about it. What a great place for a test dick. Yeah. If you're going to test drive a hard dick, make sure you do it in Branson, Missouri.

Well, no, let me tell you something. If you're going to get a hard dick in Branson, Missouri, you're going to need to take blowchew. That's what I mean. So, no, I took some, I did. So I didn't, I didn't booze it up all last week. And, you know, I was relaxing and stuff. But Amber was like, you know, we're, you know, it's, we're, we're, you know, it's, we're married about, you know, a little over a year now. We've been thinking maybe about starting

to have a little young and or so. And so we don't have a lot of time together. So when we are together, I really got to make it count, which is why I take a blue chue. And so we're in, so we're in Branson, right? And me and Amber got the, me and Amber got the privilege. What was that? This family brought to you by Blue Chew. Little boy, Blu Chewere. I was going to name my son blue because I needed it for him to get here. Well, I mean, it was just setting up my Bluetooth story, which is very real. We were in Branson and we were lucky enough to have the bedroom right beside Amber's grandparents. And it's their house.

So they've got one of them grandparents. Yeah, they've got one of them grandparents type beds that just like squeaks if you fart. And so we knew that that wasn't going to be on the table. So Amber was like, I know. let's just get let's just get on the floor so i'm like okay and the space between the bed and the wall was just barely big enough for my fat ass too too deep go of reference yeah that's the space yes so so the space between the wall and the bed was just barely big enough for my fat ass to fit in let alone go to work so i'm sitting there and i'm trying my best and every time i'm you know trying to

give it the business, my thigh is rubbing up against the wall that is connected to Amber's grandparents, bedrooms. So they just hear. God damn it. You know what? Are they sanding furniture in there? Are they making a brand new end table? Is that what's going on?

Well, that's the thing. That's the thing. So I'm trying to be like super quiet. And I'm just like, I can't do this shit. She's like, no, you're good. And I'm like, no, I'm literally, I'm rubbing a blister on my thigh against this goddamn wall. I just ain't doing it. And so, you know, we've been down there for maybe, maybe two minutes.

Can I ask you a question? I'm probably being generous with myself. Yeah. Why didn't you just move the bed a little bit? You could because it was already up against the other wall. This room is barely big enough for a bed and me to be in at the same fucking time. All right. I'm glad to say that for Blotchu and not fucking Branson.

What a nightmare. No, well, that's just, I mean, that ain't Branson's fault. That's just what their lake house is. their room is huge. This is the guest room. So, anyway. Yeah, this isn't a fucking hotel. So anyways, I'm sitting there trying to give it the business,

realizing I think I might be waking them up. All of a sudden, we heard something, and we thought it was them getting up to, like, knock on our door. And Amber goes, be quiet real quick. I think my grandparents are coming. And as soon as she said that, I was just like, huh.

Who knew? That's all you needed. was a little pressure. No, you needed to think about a mamma. So, so if you want to get your dick super hard in Branson, Missouri, right now, we've got a special deal for our listeners. Visit bluechew.com and get your first shipment free when you use our special promo code, red. All you have to do is pay $5 shipping. $5. It ships to you.

You get your dick hard. Again, that's bluechew, B-L-U-C-com. And Joe, people need to know. It's prescribed online and shipped straight to your door in a discreet package. So you don't have to go to a doctor's office. You don't have to wait in the pharmacy, not like that. They ship the hard dick straight to your door from the internet. Wait, so I could just get a hard dick shipped to me?

Yeah, they're working on it. Yep. Wow. Over in China. God damn. That's B-L-U-E-H-com promo code red to try it for free. Blue Chew is the better, cheaper, faster choice. For all your hard dick needs.

First spot. all your hard dick needs go to bluechew. Well, probably not all of them, but most of them go to bluechew. And thank you, Bluechew for sponsoring the podcast. I'm glad you put that caveat in there. Some poor old boy being like, man, I had a hard dick, and I went to BluChu.com for my hard dick needs, and they didn't have no fucking, you know,

girls in all leather fucking a donkey or nothing. Yeah, basically it's really just the one need. The one need. You need a hard dick. Bluechew. Blue Chip. What to do with it is entirely up to you. Hey, guys, I'm going to be radio silent for about five minutes.

All that talk about my dick made me have to use it. Someone going there and pee. Okay. I thought you meant you were about to just jack off. I know. I was like, God damn. I thought he was sad. Seriously.

Fuck. All this talk about a hard dick just gave me one. So I'm going to go beat the shit out of it. I'll be right back. What else am I supposed to do? Remember when I came, when a man-law came to the door? It happened again. I don't know how I thought that was going to be interpreted any other way than I'm about to go jack off.

Yeah. It was also like, man, you guys have a really loose podcast, huh? You guys just go jerk off in the middle of it. Well, our ad was just Corey telling a story about fucking between the bed and the wall until he got a blister on his ass and coming when his papal in law knocked on the door. Coming because of papal. Right that a hell of a thing. So wasn't there something else that you specifically had wanted to get into, I thought? You texted something that you wanted to talk about.

Not that, no. What? What do you mean? Oh, God. So Justin Bieber challenged Tom Cruise to fight on Twitter. You remember that? Yeah. And we were talking about it because I was like, everyone's sitting on Bieber.

Tom Cruise is an old man. Like I was like, look, Tom Cruise would beat his ass, but I just wanted to make an argument. and plus I feel like Bieber's in good shape. He might be able to fight. And then I really don't know how, but we got on talking about whether or not I could beat Tom Cruise in a foot race. And he's 5'6 and 54, and I'm fast and I can. And anyway, I just keep bringing it up. Okay.

That's the whole thing. Okay. Good. Good to know. No, it was something else, but I don't know what it was. But I don't remember. What was the thing you were trying to say about Broads? Because I came in and then I got to do that. Broads. Oh, it was that.

They're cold in the office? Oh, so do you not, you don't know the thing we're referencing when I said that? There's this thing that's like kind of viral right now. We did all this up top, but so quickly, or I'll try to be, since you haven't seen it. A woman wrote a piece for the New York Times that the central, like, point of it was climate control in American office buildings is inherently biased towards men. right, which is like, that's true, in my opinion. I don't, that's... What?

It's, the climate settings in office buildings are geared towards the comfort of the male employees and don't take into consideration the comfort of female employees. And as such, women in the office setting are often cold and uncomfortable. And, you know, that's bullshit. That's what the New York Times article said. But this other woman on Twitter, a journalist of some kind, but not, she did not write the article I just described to you. She shared the article on her Twitter with the caption, I guess, or whatever.

She said, I've been saying for years that air conditioning is oppressive and sexist and bullshit. And any woman who's worked in an office knows how true this is. And it ends with hashtag ban AC, ban air conditioning. A lot of people, myself included, you know, retweeted that or replied to her or whatever and just basically like, yeah, your goddamn mind. You know, because like to me, the woman who wrote the actual article, she wasn't saying ban air conditioning, but this lady was. And I was like, that is fucking ridiculous. Like that initial argument. Yeah.

Bitch, do you not remember the West? What do you mean? The Old West? Yes. The Old West were bitches were wearing layers and layers and layers of fucking dress. and petticoats and knickers and all that stuff. And like, it was hot as fuck, dude. You were disgustless.

Listen, if you don't like a smelly pussy now, you ain't going to ever achieve a not smelly pussy if there's no air conditioning. Preach. You're from Florida. I am from Florida. The state of ass sweat. Yes.

Right. And as soon as I saw that, I thought two things. I was like, I bet she from up north somewhere and also has. money or grew up with money or whatever because I can't imagine anybody's from like those are such blanket statements like you're assuming that no other woman likes a cold room you know what I mean right there was also bullshit there were there were women who like retweet replied as to it was basically

just said like speaking as a fat girl she can go fuck herself you know but it isn't even just fat girls no I know people run hot or run cold dude Maria Bamford loves a cold hotel room, 65 degrees. You know what I mean? Damn, man. Yeah, dude, it's not fucking, it's not, I'm, wear a goddamn sweater. It's for the greater good. Because if you think about it, the business doesn't want to spend more electricity keeping it at a cooler temperature.

They lose money that way. So it doesn't make sense. It's not a good business decision for them to keep it colder. But if it's hot, people work less. People don't want to work in a hot environment. That's why we fucking have air conditioning. It's like you said put on a fuck in a hot environment

It's the worst Yeah dude Hell no don't hit You said you know put on a sweater But yeah it's the you know If you're cold You can put something else on or cover up So is that you're hot

Is movie theater sexist too? Movie theaters are sexist? Hospitals are old Yeah Well and hospitals have to be Hospitals have to be colder Because they need to keep a sterile environment Right yeah

Come on dude And you know nurses Nurses be wearing scrubs and shit Working in the hospital What's also sexist is you thinking that everything that exists in the world is against you? Right. Come on, dude. There's like legit, horrible things that are like geared against us.

And it's your, and you're talking about the thermostat. This is the shit I'm talking about. That's kind of what I was saying about the money thing. And this is my, I don't know that I or say this, but I'm going to because I don't know this woman or whatever. But to me, that's like something that's somebody who's been like pretty comfortable, generally speaking for most of her life. For sure. That's her version of oppression. Yeah.

She's been so comfortable for most of her life, you know, white privilege and all that shit, that like oppression to her is being chilly in a boardroom. Yes. You know, and that's just, it's stupid. You're telling me your quote-unquote oppression can be changed by you pressing your finger on a fucking button to raise the temperature. Oh, what a horrible life you've lived. Well, I feel like the point of the article, just for the sake of, because there's two things. This is a lady who tweeted it.

who was like ban AC and then there's a lady who wrote the article and I feel like her point was like sometimes we're not allowed like the boss is always a fucking guy and he gets to control

the goddamn thermostat and that's why I'm pissed Yeah dude if you if you're in an office that's mostly women You know what to me it's like Whoever's mostly in the office If you were If you got to vote

Because some women run hot Like you're saying That's what I'm saying Yeah you just like It's not that hard You can send out a memo And everybody responds and then you You tally up the fucking thing

It's it's a way work environment. If people don't work better in, like if they don't want to work in a cold environment. But my argument is I can't get negative work. You can put a code on. Sure. So I mean, I hear, like, I think Carmen saying she feels that if you put it to a vote like that, you're probably going to come out with

a result other than 76 degrees or like you're probably not going to get. Or the result will be, it's a difference of a couple degrees. I don't think it would be that different. Right. You know what I mean? Because again, like, especially if you're working in a working environment and you're like, it's very sedentary and you're sitting, a lot of times because of the lack of movement,

you feel colder because you're not moving. You're not exerting any kind of energy. You know what I mean? So it's also like, like there's, I've never met a construction worker that was woman or man that was ever like, oh, it's too,

it's too cold. You know what I mean? It's always refreshing to be in air conditioning. I thought you meant outside. I was like, shit. That's all they talk about for one month. That was another thing, you know, that a couple people is like, well, you know, what you can do for that if you're too cold in the office is go get a job, work in construction or, you know, whatever. I mean, you shouldn't have to change employment just because you're, like, uncomfortable, slightly uncomfortable by, because that's the other thing. It's a mild inconvenience for you to make these broad statements. Like, like, these guys are purposefully trying to control women.

But at the same time, if you have a bunch of women who are like, do. it's fucking cold in here like I can't work in this environment and you're being a stubborn asshole about it well then fuck you yeah I mean I worked in that place though but I mean I was cool with it because I was hot all the time and the argument was you worked was mostly women but the boss but the boss was the guy and it was always cold because he ran hot and they always complained about it and he always said you can put clothes on I can't get naked and I you know I'll be honest I was the oppressive silent majority because I was like yeah fuck yeah what they're guy said because I run I run hot as shit.

Well, I thought I did until I started touring with these motherfuckers. My God. I love a cultural show. I thought I did too. Until I started touring with these motherfuckers. This is the part of this thing that annoys me is it's not for the greater good of women. It's just for

whoever is bitching. Like it's all personal gain which annoys me. You know what I mean? Because that's how you end up with this this like skewed version of like the white feminism that doesn't really give a fuck about black chicks or people of color or anything like that it's literally all just for their personal game people have this thing not everybody of course but a lot of people and

you know women men whoever that like they're fine with pretty much whatever unless it's something that direct or that offends them personally or you know what I mean like they don't care about any other jokes or whatever that you might make as a comedian or whatnot making fun of whoever shitting on whoever, but if you say one thing that like gets to them on a personal level, then, you know, I will say, though, that makes me way less angry than when someone is offended on behalf of another person. I agree with that. That makes me. Again, that's also some, that's mostly white bitches, dude, because they didn't have anything that bad happened to them.

They didn't come from slaves. You know what I mean? And it's also like they want to be like, oh, I'm defending someone or whatever. And it's like, I've done that before. I've fucking defended. This is not how it goes. Like, this is not, like, that was literally my job once upon a time. This is not what it looks like at all.

That person's not even here. The one you're talking about, they're not in the room. And most of the time, the person that they're quote unquote defending is usually not offended. You know what I mean? Like, there's been so many chicks that like, and again, it's always a white chick that'll come up after to me and talk about shit. And I was like, bitch, you don't know what you're talking about. You don't know what you're talking about. you say it literally just like that and I would pay almost as much as I would pay to see you do comedy and I love when you do comedy just to see you say bitch you don't know what you're talking about I have I know I want to see it sell tickets to that dude one time like it's like there's the show the meet and the greet and then get no much Carmen tell someone to shut the fuck up that's three separate ticket tears let me be your manager I feel like I should say right now because I feel like if I don't one of our listeners or somebody will point it out we're talking about people that get like offended on behalf of other people who

for something that was said that's like offensive to them or whatever but that's not the same thing as being like you know an ally in that type of thing you mean like angry that's what that's what i was gonna ask is like you mean you be making videos talking about how you start you shouldn't uh you know shit on gay people yeah yeah like i don't mean making you know queer jokes right those are great i mean just you know policy that is literally detrimental to people's lives yeah right like not giving them equal rights say that that's bullshit if you're not gay, that ain't the same thing as being at your show, Carmen, and you tell a black joke and a white lady gets offended by the black joke you told. Well, that's the problem that I have is there are jokes. Right. We're not politicians. We're not making policy. It's a place for you to suspend all of that, especially now, because we're constantly

bombarded with it all the time. Like, I mean, that was, if you think about before, you had local. news and it was what was going on in your area and then that was it and then every once in a while you'd hear a big story from someplace that happened, some place, either some place else in the country, but it had to be a huge story in order for you to fucking hear about it.

Now because we're bombarded with all of the news from all over the world all the time and then if you're motherfuckers wonder why they're depressed because you're drowning in negative information. So when you come to a comedy show and then you tell me that you're not allowed

to laugh at something that could be offensive. To me, that's like, now you're taking joy away from other people, you know? Yeah. And that's where I draw the way where it's like, I'm not a fucking politician. And I've, and it's not my goddamn place. I dropped out of college. I lived out of a Saturn for six years.

Stop looking to me for being a moral high ground. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Besides most of these fucking people who bitch about that shit have never done anything to actually help anybody. else. Well, that's the thing. Politicians and policymakers exist. Go fucking fight with, you know what I mean? But they won't. And some people will. And those people are fucking, but like, and that's what I'm saying.

And what are they really doing? They're just tweeting at them? No, no, no. I'm saying people do make that fight and you're not there. You're at this comedy show tonight. Like, come on. I'm not, I'm not arguing that's the same person. I'm saying it's very different people. Well, yeah, you clock out if you go to a comedy show. That's all it is. Okay. I get it. I get that. And a lot of this all really stemmed from Louis because Louis was such like a person who was in women's corner and was like super supportive giving women jobs to all this other shit and when the New York Times article came out there was an obscene like it was we were so we felt so betrayed because this was here was this guy that we all looked up to and was like fuck yeah finally a dude that's on our side that isn't just shitting on brads right talking about how the wife beater is insane that we even call it that and all this other stuff talking about all this shit that was like super pro women. And then the article comes out and we've like a lot of women who didn't know that that weren't in the industry find out that this guy that they looked up to betrayed them. And that is, I mean, that's also why they're so obsessed with everything that he does now. But at the same time, it's like that doesn't mean that everything that everybody talks about on stage is it true. You know what I mean? I think it goes back. I mean, I'm sure it goes back even farther. But like the first ones that I remember like, like,

just thinking back on it right now was I remember one with Daniel Tosh and one with Dane Cook. It's separate incidents where each of them were just working out like new material and just kind of riffing. They don't even have, they're not doing a polished bit. They're just riffing on something. And in both cases, they get heckled by a woman who's offended by something they said. Then they start engaging with that woman and ended up they both made some version of like a admittedly shitty rape joke just trying to shut a heckler. down and then they went home and wrote, you know, blogs about it that went viral or whatever, and it became like many controversies and like.

But that was also like the difference is like Daniel Tosh was like I hope you get raped because he was trying to make a rape joke. Wouldn't it be hilarious if she got raped? No, I like. And then it goes, no, I hope. I hope like eight of you would rape. Like would somebody rape her right now or are you going to shut up? Right.

Like, but that's also someone being absurd. That's he's not like legitimately asking people to rape her. You know what I mean? Yeah. But the difference was, is, like, Louis would make these very racy jokes, and then you find out that he was doing, like, questionable behavior outside of it. Yeah, it was the great Jim Jeffery's joke about,

before the Louis stuff, about Cosby. Where he's, like, fucking clean comedians, you know, you get mad at the guy making the racy joke, and it turns out the clean guy is actually the crazy one. That's another thing, Louis, listen, this comes in, like, way second place about betraying women. But he betrayed comedians to a certain extent. There, too. A lot of comedians.

He literally betrayed some comedians when he got his dick out and all that. But I mean like this idea, like what Jim Jeffrey's point was. It was like, we just talk about this stuff, but we don't mean it. It's not coming from that real of a place. It's just these horrible thoughts we have and we tell them to you and we laugh. But that's what I'm saying. And it's like, fuck, no, this dude's crazy. Right.

Louis changed the shift in people in general. Oh, that's why you're saying. That's why I'm saying that. It's like he was such a pinnacle. He was such a pinnacle like now. people are skeptical when you make dark jokes are like, is he really serious? Jesus, you're fucking right. Shit, yeah, I actually, I'll, we're slow on the uptake.

I just now kind of keyed into what you were saying too, and that's a really good point. You're right. That's, that's... Cosby was like the betrayal of like this holy dude who's just there to me. And then Louis was the one of like, even the dark dude can't be fucking trusted. But it's like, I mean, you're right. You go back, because I've done it. You go back and watch a lot of like old Louis specials now and there's a lot of shit he says

on there. It's like hilarious at the time. but now with the context it's like, you know, still funny kind of, but it just icky, you know what I mean? It makes you, it's just like,

ah, that's, well, what a doubt. Sure, it's like when you're hanging out with somebody and you know he's cheating on his wife. Like before it, you would have a new level. It's a less, you can still be cool with him, kind of,

but you still don't feel good about it. Because you're put in this position of whether, who are you betraying by having this information, you know? So you can't watch it the same way. But that's infuriating to me because now you're applying that

it's really just it's being prejudiced against all comedians that all comedians are fucking awful and it's like that's just like being racist it's just as ignorant you know what I mean but you guys are you're not cool with me making an incest joke but if you put a castle on a dragon then you can want then it's the best

television show on in history you know what I mean? Yeah. So you guys can't suspend disbelief because it's one person saying it Wow. It's just like stand-up can't be fiction anymore? What the fuck? Yeah, that doesn't even just, that doesn't just work in stand-up

because, like, I mean, I've probably mentioned this example before. I don't know about the podcast, but like, remember when me and my family went to see 40-year-old virgin together, like mom, dad, sister, yada, yada, yada, and my mom, and my mom is very, full disclosure, and the boys know this, my mom is not this pretentious and stuck up anymore at all. But she was, like, wanting to walk. walk out of the theater because of a 40-year-old virgin. And then afterwards it's just like, and I was, you know, going into comedy at the time or

whatever. And she's just like, I just don't understand why they have to use such filth. There's no reason to use that language and talk about sex and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Then mom goes home and watches her favorite show, which is this fucking sopranos. Right. Like, one of the most, like, there's cursing. There's murder. There's rape.

There's whatever. But because it's a drama, all that shit's fine. But comedy has to be clean for some goddamn reason. And it's the fuck. I've never. and at the time I brought that up to her, but I was in high school, so even if I was right,

she didn't want to fucking hear any of it. Of course, and you probably couldn't articulate it the way you can now. Yeah, exactly. But I just, I've never been able to wrap my head around why if Tony Sopranos says, go fuck you and then there's tities in his face,

that's fine. But if Steve Karell says fuck and then there's titties, it's like, why? I just don't understand why they have to do this in order to be funny. Steve Kareel getting tities in his face is a little offensive.

He's very funny, man. I think that people, and this is bullshit, but I think there are a lot of people that have this expectation of comedy that it's like good, clean, fun, or whatever, and those same people,

they turn on the Sopranos, it's like, well, this is a mobster show. You know what I mean? Of course there's murder and all this stuff. And again, that's ridiculous because comedy's always been, you know, but... We don't have to get into this. It's always hairy,

but I've never been more pro-Louis going away than I am right now. I've never thought about what you just said. Oh, you mean based on what she said. And like, fuck. Like, because like, I don't want to say I've struggled with that. Fuck that guy.

And if a club, like, hires someone who's been accused of putting his dick in front of people's face, then fuck that club. But if a dude can get people to come see him, it's like, who's right is it to anyone? That's what I'm saying. It's like, I don't care. But my whole thing is. But now I'm like, fuck him. Go away. Like, you're right.

You, he just made comedy. So I'd ever ascribe that to him, but you're right. I mean, that was just, it's the biggest example. I'm certain there are the things, sure, but it's just like... Aziz is kind of a similar thing where it's a little different. I know what Aziz did is not anywhere near as atrocious. It's just being a dick. But his whole brand was being a good feminist guy,

and I think a lot of people were like, okay, so all of you are full of shit. But I also, I don't think, I think if a guy puts his hand on his, I don't give a shit. Like, to me, that's not, he's, he's not predatory. You eat somebody out for 30 minutes, and then you're like, hey, are you going to take care of me, too? I'm just making the point, though, of a guy building, like, being completely full of shit. I mean, I guess Cosby's kind of the same way. But I always felt like Aziz never presented himself as, like, a smooth operator. And to me, most of what happened in that his incident that went out was that, like, he was like,

I feel like that was mostly him trying to be fucking James Bondi, and he's just really fucking bad at it. Because he's, like, you know, a nerdy comedian guy or whatever. And he just like, it was cringy, but like only because he wasn't pulling it off. You guys are talking about what he actually did or did not do to that girl. I'm merely making a point about someone building a brand one way or the other. And then like kind of, as you were talking about, comedians being put on this pedestal and then undercutting that themselves. And he certainly did that. Well, it's a combination of Louis and the last election.

because the Louis in the last election were two pinnacle things where everybody started looking to comedians started talking about the election a lot more so then people started listening to comedians and not in the form of entertainment you know and it's like okay some of like and some of the big ones like the ones that talk about shit like that sure but not all of us

because now it's like we're all being stereotype it's like no motherfucker not all of us are speaking our truth sometimes we're just saying shit to make people laugh so we ain't fucking sad you know i had a lady one time even like uh even if you are saying you know shit you do believe in and all it it still can even go beyond that because i had a lady one time i don't i'm trying to think what the bit was but i was talking in californian it's uh oh californians asking me and this is mostly in like interviews and shit i've done but i have been asked a version of this question countless times what can liberals do to to

to reach people from where you're from, you know, rural Americans, right, that Trump apparently got to. What can liberals do to get to reach those people? I mentioned that in my act and to set that up. I say, so then, you know, she says, well, what can we do to, and as I'm saying this about this hypothetical lady just to set up a thing that really does happen to me. Yeah, because you have to have it in. Right. Some lady in the front was like, no one ever said that. No one ever said that to you. Like, like, heckled me by being like, no, she didn't say that. And I just said, and I just yelled.

I was like, of course she didn't fucking say that. I was like, I'm trying to be, you know, efficient up here and get to the goddamn point. But, you know, this is a real thing that happens to me. But no, no one said those words explicitly to me, you know. One night at side splitter, someone hit Dom Herrera with that. I don't remember what the story was at all. But someone hit him with the same thing. That didn't happen.

And he ignored it. And he started, that didn't happen. And Tom pauses. And he goes, what the fuck did you just say? And then he went on this fucking beautiful Domerera rant about how it did happen. But even if it didn't happen, you should count your fucking lucky stars at night that I'm up here making stories up. Do you imagine how beautiful this story is if I made it up? If this crazy shit I'm telling you right now didn't happen to me, then you owe me more fucking money, sir.

Because you know how hard it would be to make a story up like this? Yeah, that means I'm even more of a brilliant writer than you already think that I am. Yes. Yeah. It's frustrating. And also who gives a fuck if it's real. Right. This isn't a goddamn TED.

doc. This isn't a live autobiographical fucking, like, you know what I mean? You came here to laugh not to scrutinize everything I said like I say and that's the thing that like between the last election and Louis, that has been the huge shift that's been super frustrating

to deal with as a comedian is because we don't get the fucking benefit of the doubt anymore. Can you imagine Rodney Dangerfield having to deal with that shit after literally every goddamn joke to be told? Yeah, do you is your right? Is your right? Is your right? Is your wife really that fat? Is your wife really that fucking mean to you?

Is your wife? You know what I mean? Like, it sounds exhausting. You don't really get sexual pleasure from somebody pickpocketing you. That's bullshit. Where does Dr. Vinny Boombots practice at? Valley Village, obviously. You do get respect.

That's bullshit. We all respect you. You don't not get respect. This guy's full of shit. We're all here respecting you. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. He's in front of an audience full of people respecting him. Because obviously, you have to respect someone.

enough to listen to them. He's in a room full of people respecting him while he's saying that he never gets any respect. Yeah, it's we're playing. It's a work. It's a work. It's all a work. It's really hot in here. Yeah.

It's about, my God, because fucking Carmen. I was, I raised the thermostat when I came in here. I was staring at it. I changed my environment myself. When I said it, we don't give a fucking coat off. Jesus. You got a coat on and you made it hot in here. Well, hey, you know, thank you for dropping it.

Oh, sure. Just like that, my bad. No, no, no, no. I wanted to end on such a weird note. I appreciate you guys. No, we're not ending on a weird note. We're done. We put our time in.

Going back to audiences expecting too much from you, if they want more, fuck them. You could listen to the next last week's episode. Or you could also just give them money. Tell people, you know, how they can follow you, hear you shit, all that type of stuff. Plug something. You know, your Twitter, whatever. A fan in. Plug a fan in.

actually since the last time i actually had a few people that did start following me good so i'm gonna first i'm gonna thank your listeners uh for being rad they're sweet and uh yeah i i will say they expect a lot out of you now when they follow you they do like what i don't i'm just maxum of you just a call back relax we just talked about it no i don't want to um Carmen morales dot com for all of your Carmen morales needs i have a podcast uh if you uh with someone who is who is not as progressive as the two of you So if you guys want to listen to that, it's no sir, I don't like it,

Drew Spinn on. Oh yeah. It was a really fun episode as well. I love Voki. Do you say his last name right? Yeah, yeah. He feels like a last name guy. A lot of people call him.

It's a fun. It's got the V and the hard K sound. And his hat. He looks like a Voki hat. You know what I mean? A Voky hat. Every time I see him, he's wearing a hat. Yeah.

Well, he's been taking a propitia now, so I don't think he needs to wear a hat as often. Okay. He's doing pretty good. His dick still works and everything. From what I heard. I need to test them. Well, if he don't, it's fine.

Bluechu. Bluechu. That's right. That's right. Be stressed out. What? No, sir, I don't like it. No sir, I don't like it.

No sir, I don't like it. there's a bunch of archived episodes. If you guys really like me, we have a Patreon where you could either give us a dollar a month just because you like us. anywhere, you get free tickets to the show. Right on. Yeah. Hell yeah. That's awesome. Yeah, dude.

The one and only Carmen Morales, everybody. Oh, yeah. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for being on Carmen. And speaking of tickets to shows, we're going to be in Asheville this weekend at the Orange Pill. You can grab those tickets at well-readcom. And another.

L-L-R-E-D Comedy.com. Another podcast favorite is going to be joining us there. Which one? De-D-D-J-L-L-J-L-L-J-L-J. Good. Northwest Georgia gutter billy himself gutter bumpkin on Twitter if you are a fan of the podcast he's been on probably more than anybody except maybe earl probably more than anybody he's breaking me on this weekend there's a fair to midland chance uh believe i've heard that

producer bryce is out of the intensive care unit oh and well yeah and may be able to join us if his health is up to it i've heard brine might be in town health and farmer brine might have brought mushrooms with him so we might really have a wild podcast God damn it. And he's going to be on the show. So if you've never seen Goeter Bumpkin, the people who have always tweet about how wild it is. Come out.

Come out, Asheville. We got three shows. Also, follow me on all the assorted social media at the funny Carmen. The funny Carmen. Fuck the not funny Carmen. She don't hit. Funny Carmen. Fuck the cold Carmen.

All right. Thank you. I'll love you. See you next time. Bye. Thank you for listening to the podcast. We appreciate all of you. Even though we just made jokes about us, we're glad you still stay too.