wellRED podcast - #156 - Oscar Speeches, Children Vaping, and The XFL!

Episode Date: February 12, 2020

In this episode the boys discuss whether or not you should use your platform during your Oscar speech to speak about causes, the witch hunt on the vaping industry, and the ups and downs of the opening weekend of The XFL! bluechew.com promo code RED

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion. Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie, I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people, people across the skew universe, I should say. Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery?

Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low mane? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better, and it's called Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions,

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So I was probably like, I should know Spanish. I'll learn Spanish. and I've just been paying to learn Spanish without practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that. Also, a fun one, I'd said it before, but I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know,

put your friend's faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball looking twin fellas. Yeah, so that was money. What was that in response to? What was that a reply gift for?

Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten. If it wasn't for Rocket Money, I never would have even figured it out. So shout out to them. They help.

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Snapshot, not available in all states are from all agents. What's going on, everybody? It's your boy the show. Corey Ryan Forster here. Wellred Comedy.com. W-E-L-R-E-D.com, which is where you can find out where we're going to be on our 2020 tour. March 12th through 14th, Raleigh, North Carolina, March 27th, New Orleans, Louisiana, April 2nd through the 4th, Indianapolis, Indiana, April 16th through the 19th, Washington, D.C., April 25th, back in the A. Atlanta, Georgia. May 8th, we're going up top to Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. May 9th, Seattle, Washington, June 20th, Minneapolis, Minnesota as part of the Minneapolis Comedy Festival with the likes of Whitney Cummings, Nick Offerman, and Burke Crischer, and fucking Jeff Foxworthy. Everybody's going to be there. It's going to be a great time.

Also, Reader, Pennsylvania at the GNI Retreat. If you've seen that funnier die video, you know that means we're going to get naked again. So, like I said, well-readcom to grab all those tickets while you're there, subscribe to our newsletter so you will know where we're going to be even before my dumbass does. Grab our album, Well-read Live from Lexington, our book, The Liberal Redneck Manifesto, Dragon Dixie out of the dark, grab a shirt, grab a hat, grab a poster, whatever the fuck you want. It don't matter. We love you anyways. Now, on with...

No, I've got more business to handle this podcast. Of course, this portion at least, is brought to you by smokyboysgrilling.com. Go to smokyboysgrilling.com to get all the rubs for all you meats and carve vodka. com if you want to drink like the show and experience Jacksonville's first and only craft vodka distillery. Carve your own path, you silly butts. This podcast was recorded with the boys in studio and me here at the house. We talked about a lot of things. We talked about the Oscars.

We talked about the XFL. We talked about vaping. And it was a whole bunch of fucking fun. So listen, subscribe, download, tell your friends, and come see us on the road. We love you. And skew. They're the liberal rednecks. They like cornbread, but sex, they care way too much, but don't give a fun.

They're the liberal rednecks that makes some people upset, but they got three big old dicks that you can suck. Well, here we are, Cho. Here we are. Yeah, Drew. There you are. Yeah, I'm in the studio in Burbank. Drew is evidently on his way.

I'm sure he got carjacked again or is breaking up a hobo fight or something, you know, over there. And the mean, the main streets of no-ho where he lives. I mean, we've talked about before, but like, Drew, me and Drew live less than 10 minutes apart via car. And, you know, like, that's in the Los Angeles area, too. So that's like, that's as close as any two people live. around here pretty much. That aren't directly neighbors. Yeah, right.

It's like, it literally takes me like eight minutes to get to Drew's house from my house. And I live in Elysium. My children walk to Walt Disney Elementary School every day, you know. And Drew has had his car stolen by a homeless man, almost got stabbed, has had multiple items stolen from his front porch. He just walked in just now. Just farted immediately. Oh. He just walked in the studio.

You know, farted? Yes. And then Chet walked in right behind him in the wake of his fart, unbeknownst to either of them at first. So it's just ravens are soaring already. I don't know. Somebody probably lowered it down. Okay. So he just walked in immediately mad about his chair.

No, man. I wouldn't matter. After farting on the sound tech. I went mad at all. I sat down in it and like that popped a ab. Yeah. You know where you, did you know where the chair is? Mm-hmm.

And it ain't there? That sucks. Oh, yeah. There was about 0.0.1 seconds where I thought I was dead. Yeah, you always think, you're being pulled straight to hell. Yeah. Like your soul's been grabbed and you're gone forever. Takes me back.

We're just talking about you living in the hood. Just speculating on your tardiness. I used to play ball in the hood, but I don't even do that anymore. I play ball in Burbank now. Here's what I happen. It's very brief. I showed up the ball late, and I forgot that I'd done that. And I got a pretty good clock that it's been an.

hour because my feet go numb because I'm old and I'm fat and I'm dumb and I don't hit. So when I started getting tired, I was like, oh, I've been here an hour. And then I was like, oh, shit, but I got here late today. Yeah. Because me and DJ's podcast ran out of there. They, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they've got like, new lights and shit in here. Do you still use a sundial?

Yeah. Like, you, you just like, you're just going like, yep, I think I've been here an hour. It's probably time to go. Well, no. I usually get there at noon and I feel like it's been about an hour and I check my phone and it's one. And then I have plenty of time to get over. I got there about 1230 today.

Check my phone at 1225 or so and was like, oh, yeah, idiot. You forgot you got here. You could only play for 30 months. I had a raven thing happened to me today, too. It was an Alanis Morissette song situation. I found a, okay, so for anybody I don't know, I started smoking when I was 16, but about two plus years ago, I switched full time to vaping. I don't give a fuck what anybody says.

It's better for you than smoking real cigarettes is. I've done that ever since. My mama says it's not. I found out right after that, or I found out after doing that, that I prefer to, like, the fruity flavors. I prefer the vape cartridges that taste like candy. Well, you can't get those no more

because all these goddamn teenagers won't stop dying. They won't stop dying. And so I had to switch to, like, just tobacco-flavored ones weeks ago. And it's like, I'm addicted. What? Yeah. I'm addicted to nicotine, so I'd still be using them, but I don't like them near as much.

Then, long story short, I found, I found one of the old cucumber cartridges in my backpack from the road. Them here. Brand new and unopened. I found it last night. And oh, my God, I was so excited. And it's broke and leaks and burns my lips and I can't use it. So, wait, wait, wait. So it burns your lips.

It's 10,000 spoons and all you need is a knife is what I meant. that earlier. It feels like it would go in that song. Yeah. Right. It burned your lips. You can't drink it, Drew. You can inhale it. Did you try? No, I mean, it's like, when I say, it's just the tiniest amount. The tiniest amount will burn it. It's acid. This is how them kids is dying. No, no. They're being dumb fat and not hitting. We can get into all this if you want to. We already did on this podcast. Did we? Okay. I think what we all agreed upon is a smear campaign. It's a witch hunt. Bootleg versions.

Okay. Or, yeah. When they break your post to throw them away. Well, I'm going to. I resign myself to. No, I was like, I pulled it out, blue on it, like Nintendo cartridge style, rubbed it off. And I was like, I can make this hit.

Does it you die? Put it back in there. Still didn't hit. And I was like, well, God damn it, I'm just going to throw this away. But it's just such bullshit. Because it's the last one. This might be the last one on Earth, Drew. You don't know.

Yeah. And it don't have. And you're going to die with it. Wait, what? Y'all still got them? You mean Georgia? So here's how it's worked out, I guess, is just the smoke shop that is near my house. They just still have what their excess supply before, I guess they were told they couldn't get them anymore.

And they have, they still have a couple mangoes and fruit punch. And I guess nobody, like all the rednecks around here are just still smoking real cigarettes. And so they, yeah, man, like I can. They ran out out of here a while ago. I cannot believe you did, but the smoke shop I go to, like it's. mainly old old motherfuckers going there to get their marlboro slut. There's still some fruit punches left. Wait, wait, wait.

Now, they're hip to it. Like, they know that I want it real bad because they, it's almost triple the price. They did that out here, too. They jacked up the prices on all those when they were going away, and I was, I was paying it, boy, but they're gone now. Why didn't you buy them all, Corey? Yeah, see, I don't, I like menthol fine. Do what? Why don't you buy them all?

Because, honestly, like, it's triple the price, and I don't mind the menthol. Like, Trays, though, I like the fruity ones. Don't get me wrong, but not enough to pay for them. fucking triple the price for them. Well, are you talking about that smoke shot? I actually enjoy menthol. Are you talking about that smoke shot by the food line? Yeah.

Buddy, they got some cratom there that is fairly priced. I don't even remember what brand it is. It's in a yellow package. It might have just been the day I was having, but who, I enjoyed it very much. No, they got good shit, man. Don't tell them that their cratom's good because it was very fairly priced. Yeah. But no, like I said, I mean, I don't mind the menthol and the Virginia tobacco.

and so I'm not paying 40 for what I can just get $14 of. Yeah, Katie found out about all these kids dying, and now she's not only hear for her that I've vape anymore, and that really don't hate for me. I think I've about convinced her that, like, because seriously, if you look, it's just like what was happening with Kratom for a while that has luckily, like, died down.

It's the same exact thing. Well, no, hold on. Wait, pause. Hold on. When all that, when the FDA and shit were releasing these numbers about all these people who have died from Kratom or whatnot. And they had other shit in the same thing. When you actually looked into it, there were extenuating circumstances that they never mentioned in those reports.

It's like, yes, that person died and had taken Kratum. Right. But it was not Kratom that killed them. My understanding was last time we had this conversation on this podcast, I thought you told me, this isn't, I'm not arguing this. This is what I thought you told me was they had gotten like black market vape. Yes, that is accurate. Like, no one has, I used jewels. Jules only.

No one has ever died or went to the hospital or anything from these. from this bullshit stuff. But to me, that's different than the cratom thing, and I'm going to tell you why. My mom is very freaked out that my nephew's doing it. Okay. Well. And he's like 14 and he's getting them from the Amish kids. What? Yeah, they got like an Amish black. That sounds the opposite of what it should be. I know. I know. Because this is the future. Right. And they say, menonites, to be fair. To be specific, mena nights. Okay. And now they got shops and they sell various things, including tobacco, which they raise. That all makes sense. Apparently they have vapes there and they don't be carding people.

And the reason I'm saying vapes that they make themselves? I have no idea, bro. Minanites are allowed to have... Hand-cranked cigarettes. I don't... Listen, men of nights are allowed to have shit, y'all. Y'all, I said Amish as a joke mostly, but

Minutonites, they have trucks and shit. All we got in Salina is Amish, and they don't. They don't be having nothing. No. We've had Minnites since I was like four. Okay. And they're like, they've got trucks and all that. It's just, it's just a cult.

Anyway, Drew, Drew, the Kratum thing... Do you know the percentage of people who... Go ahead. Don, you got a hit coming. No, it wasn't a hit. I didn't realize you weren't done with your thing. Go ahead. I'm just saying, all I was saying is the Kratom thing was,

no one ever got hurt by Kratom or Kratom products. Somebody had done Kratom and then OD'd on heroin. Right. And somebody ran with the story. Of course. So it is different. I said the exact same thing, and that's not true. It is different, but it's still a, like, smear campaign situation.

I agree. It's the same shit is when they find a motherfucker drove drunk. And then they're like, and he also smoked pot earlier today. It's like, I hear you, but that fifth of vodka did the heavy lifting. Right. Can you imagine a world, though, where Jewel, you know,

starts outsourcing their shit, gets a new supplier, whatever. Like, they still freak me out, is what I'm saying. Jewel being, like, a major, like, I don't know if they're literally a Fortune 500 company, but like a very real deal, you know, corporation. Yeah.

I think they would, are and will continue to do everything in their power to separate themselves as much as possible from that whole shit. Yeah. Because that's what behooves them. So if they... Yeah, corporations in this country, especially the tobacco ones, have definitely done a good job of separating themselves from murdering people.

Yeah, but, I mean, they did for a long time. That's what I'm saying. My point. I thought you were being sarcastic. I am being sarcastic. I'm saying like... But they did, though. If...

For a long time. Let me say it this way. If they find a supplier that will save them a million dollars a year for the next 10 years and they think one motherfucker will die from it, they're going with that supplier because they'll pay his family $4 million. But if they think that big tobacco and all whatever, whoever else is behind all this shit right now will further use that as justification to shut them down entirely by making vaping illegal, then they're going to not fuck with that.

That's not the scenario I'm actually imagined. And I'm actually imagining the scenario where big tobacco gives up on fighting them and buys them. I've heard some people say that. but I just don't see that in what is going on. Don't you have to get tobacco in the first place to get the nicotine, or are they making it in a lab somehow? That I do not know.

Like, they got to have tobacco in the beginning, right? Is there other ways to get nicotine? What the fuck is nicotine? I think you can synthesize it. But I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not sure if, like, vape juice is somehow derived originally from tobacco leaves or not. I have no idea.

Do you have to do something to the tobacco? No, because you can do it. But you think I understand what I'm putting in my body? Not at all. All right, let me say. Not just the thing. What I eat, what I drank. This right here.

I don't know what that is. This is a weird color thing. I squeezed that from a bottle. I don't know what's in that bottle. It says zero calories and it's sangria flavored. I'm white, so let's go. So, you know what it is? People don't be inhaling cigars and shit.

Like, that's not a thing. Like, you don't inhale the cigar. You just puff on it. That's what I've always heard. I've never subscribed to that personally. And you don't show? No. I can't not inhale anything I smoke.

Like, I just can't. My thing is, like, if it had, like, do they, is there like D nicotine tobacco? Like, there's uncaffeinated coffee? Because, like, to me, if cigar had nicotine in it, you'd be inhaling the fuck out of it. I don't think it's tobacco. They don't taste like regular cigarettes. They reportedly taste terrible, but that's the shit that people smoking movies, TV shows and stuff. And there's herbal cigarettes.

Andy's fucked with some of that before. It's like, uh, I don't hit. I don't know. No, they don't hit. It's something that's supposed to make you feel calm. Like it's one of them kind of drugs. Like, Kaaba. I don't know if it's Kaaba.

Imagine if you can smoke Kaaba. Right. Have y'all ever had a dream that you couldn't escape from? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Have you then woken up, falling back asleep and went back into it? I have before, yeah.

That happened to me this morning, like, I'm not kidding. Like, four or five times. You're anxious, and I've been anxious, and DJ's really anxious. Something going on. It ain't the moon. It ain't the moon. They say that if that happens. if you wake up from a nightmare

you're supposed to switch but like get up for a second switch positions because if you just open your eyes and be like fuck and then go right back into the same position it's easier to lull back

back into that same I wouldn't know that though I believe you and I believe them to a certain extent but like fuck that I'm just going back to sleep I wouldn't even call this one a nightmare really

it was more just like a general inconveniencing in my brain which is what happens to me all the time no I feel great when I've had a fever before I guess a fever dream

oh buddy though knew literal fever dreams i swear to god i've woken up before and like covered in like a cold sweat and i smelled different than i've ever smelled in my life and i in my head i was like this is the smell of fear and i now believe that i really i really do i do literally i had that thought and convinced myself of it but if i ever smell that again i'll be like that's a smell of fear i know what they was the toxins leaving your body from the sickness fear i don't know i know the response this is about to elicit but i wake up

at least three times a week like that. Stinking? Yeah. Stanking of eight seven? Just covered in sweat, just fucking, ugh! Just screaming and just soaked. Like, we have to wash our sheets so much more than normal people do. Yeah.

Yeah, me and you were talking about that on here not long ago. I'm talking about literal fever, like when you're sick with a fever and you have fitful fever. Like, dude, nothing hits less than those. Do your sheets just smell? or are they also stained? They've been... You've seen his hair. Has been known to yellow?

They stained. Well, the reason I asked is my buddy Luke, who was my roommate in Australia and Boston, when we were roommates in Australia, we just had, like, tiny, thin beds. You know, like, we slept two feet from each other. And he smelled at night when he'd be sweating and drinking and, you know, like whatever. And his sheets would get yellow real quick. Like, yellow. Yeah.

Gross. It was gross. Yeah, my pillow often gets a touch of the yellow and it has to be taken care of. But my, no, my dream was like, I was in New York for some comedy thing and I couldn't. This was this morning. Yeah. And it was like, oh, I'm going to be late for that. Oh, I can't find the train or I can't, I can't find the train or I can't, whatever.

Like, just like, like, just little minutia annoyances that kept happening over and over and I kept waking. And I kept waking up and being like, I didn't hit. But not like, oh, gosh. God. But then I would, then I look, what time is it? 7 a.m. Fuck that. Go back to sleep.

And I'm right back in New York. Same situation. But again, not like a nightmare, like not a full-on nightmare just to like, oh, this is tedious. You know, it was tedious. See, that's a nightmare to me. Right. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, again, it didn't hit for me, but I wouldn't describe it as a nightmare.

I often can't get out of a dream. No, I just mean me specifically, like me and you are two different people and you being late is just a minor convenience but to me it is a goddamn nightmare and i have that dream so fucking much i often cannot get out of the dream yeah it happens to be in other scenarios too it's always in the morning and i've never done that in the middle of the night like if i wake up in the middle of night from a dream i don't ever remember going back to sleep and having the same one it's always like the early morning shit have you ever i'm trying to think of how to describe this because these are the most fucked up dreams i ever have and they've only started in the last like three years and it's like i wake i wake up

now probably more than that not in the last five years for sure i wake up wherever i am sleeping at like whether it's my bed or in a hotel or wherever i wake up wherever i actually went to sleep at in the real world and then i can't get and it's not sleep paralysis because i know about that and i know that's a thing but i can't get like i can't move right. Like I can start to get up and it's like I get like sucked back down onto the bed or something. And I can feel it physically. Right. But then I'll, but then I'll, I'll wake up and I'm like, oh shit, thank God I woke up. But I'm still not awake and the same thing is still happening. And that'll happen three or four times. And then finally I'll wake up for real. And I'm like, okay, cool. And then I can just get up and everything's fine. I mean, is that sleep paralysis? Either that or hell. but like it feels very different core you have sleep paralysis don't you

it isn't when it ends does it like wear off or because when what i'm talking about ends it ends by me actually waking up into the real world and being like okay finally but you're lucid if you remember all that shit i mean i can remember a lot of my dreams especially if i try in in this situation are you in your bed and you know that you're in your bed whatever bed i have slept in whether it's a hotel bed or bed at my mother-in-laws or my bed whatever whatever bed i went to bed in i wake up in and then i can't move but there's also this really weird physical sensation that comes with it with like me trying to move it's like a yeah paralysis no like a like a electrical feeling or something so oh i'm getting anxious just even talking about this because it hasn't happened to me in a while

i've always heard you hallucinate with that shit i don't never see no demons or nothing and all every time I've ever had sleep paralysis, it's, I woke up from like a dream or whatever and I'm like awake and I'm in my bed and I'm sitting there just like, like, okay, I got to get up and get in the shower and I fucking can't.

Like I literally can't move nothing and I'm just sitting there trying so hard, like trying to Hulk out of it and I just fucking can't and I'm terrified. And then eventually I get like a cramp goes away and I can, I can move. But it just, okay, once I start moving, I just get up out of the bed.

That part at the end there, you said eventually it's like you kind of like snap out of it and now you can move and you're okay. Yeah. But you don't like what like I regain consciousness and it ends. I was awake. I was awake that whole time. That's what I'm saying. I'm not. I'm asleep.

But you think you are every single time, right? Until you finally are. Yeah. But like Corey's saying it like wears off. But I feel you guys are just experiencing it differently. You try to move. moving you can't. You're aware of that. Whatever world you're in, that feels like a type of sleep paralysis. And by the way, this paralysis, demons are when you're seeing a demon. You know it's a

dream, but you can't move, scream, or get out of it. And then the way I've woken myself up from them is screaming eventually. I just remembered the most... I think they're all related. I just remember the most recent one. This had to be a dream. Or, I mean, or like, the other day I woke up, and I'm making air quotes right now. I woke up and I had to pee. I got up and walked to my bathroom. Everything's completely normal. I sit down on the toilet, and then it happens on the toilet. I think you're waking up and going back out. I woke, but then I woke up from that episode, and I was in my bed, and I had to pee, and I was like, and then I got up for real and went and pee, but I didn't, in the dream, I didn't, I didn't come back into my bed and lay back down,

and then I woke back up. Like, I don't think, I don't think that I got up and moved around or anything. Katie would tell me about that. But you can't move. That's the thing with, the paralysis. I think you're experiencing sleep paralysis in a different way than Corey. So I'm experiencing sleep paralysis while also dreaming? Yeah. Well, because the part I'm focused on is you're

trying to move and can't. Yeah, that seems pretty definitive. But again, I've just always thought that it was a thing where like well, exactly like Corey describes it. When you lay there and you can't move and then gradually it wears off and now you can move. And I'm saying I think that's a thing and maybe this is slightly different

but I think it's related because a paralysis demon which is a thing. It's different than all of them, but there's the aspect of not being able to move and slowly becoming aware that you can't move and you can't get out of this. And I've only had that twice and both times I woke myself up finally by screaming,

but I could not scream for what felt like five seconds. See, I can scream. Yeah. And I'd be screaming in those dreams. You know, as soon as I realize what's going on, I'm like screaming. Do you wake up from the screams? Not like the first one.

but like I'm a three scream waker and I'll wait that's another thing that makes I'm actually glad you brought that up because that's another thing that makes me think that I am actually like dreaming all of this as opposed to experiencing this phenomenon like the way that like Corey describes it I'll be screaming my ass off right and then finally wake up and I I have have not been screaming. Have you, like, mumbled as far as you know? Like, like,

no. And Katie, like, Katie's a fairly light sleeper and it's also, like, she will tell me. She'll slap me and shit, you know, if I'm over there having some kind of fit. She'll punch me or whatever.

Stop. You know, I've been woken up by several women telling me that I was screaming. Oh, for sure. When Andy, Andy, I would be.

I'm not screaming. Andy will, like, moan or mumble. And if I wait a, her up or she does wake up she'll tell me she was screaming so in her dream she's screaming and at her real world she's kind of mm or whatever yeah and I'm maybe I am doing that but I feel like it Katie would tell me and she hasn't mentioned it I haven't just asked she fucking a hundred percent would tell you yeah she's told me when

I've done she might have slept through it though yeah normally this shit happens to me early in the morning which by early I mean early for me but she is awake and about here's how fat dumb don't hit you are okay you are you are lucky enough not to suffer from sleep paralysis so you just have nightmares that you have sleep paralysis right that's what i seems like to me did it start after corey described what it was to you no i mean i've known what it was for a while from reading about it or whatever else so no but you learned about it before you started having them dreamed core is there a physical sensation or can you just not move i no matter how hard you try but you don't feel

The only thing I can describe it as I can feel my inner body attempting to move. It feels like you're straining. You know what I'm saying? Like, all my muscle, it's like I can control my muscles just to the point of where like they're like almost vibrating. Like I'm, I don't know, man. It's like the moment right before Hulk hulks out. Like I'm just sitting there and I'm straining and I'm just like, God damn it.

God damn it. And just my whole body is fucking tense, but it won't go nowhere. and I'm terrified of it. Because, like, I mean, even though I know that I experience it, when you first, when it first starts happening, you don't even have time to think. You're just like, oh, fuck, I'm, well, here it is. I'm paralyzed. So, like, no, it's not like when your foot goes numb or something. You don't feel that.

I just feel like an internal fucking tension throughout my body. Can you imagine the Hulk version of him just fucking tiders up and just, like, when Corey Hulk's out? Remember the marshmallow man? I think it was Rob Ford. The Missile Man? Yeah, the stay puff marshmallow man. Yeah. Yeah, Corey got a stay puff thing going on.

You seen that video? I do. Somebody's going to diagnose all of us, but me especially with some kind of like impending lunacy. You know what I mean? Or something. I'm supposed to be listening to this and be like, he's describing the exact symptoms of something that gets right. Yeah, exactly.

That worries you, doesn't it? That's a fear you have. What? Losing my mind? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Like more than a normal anxious person because of family history. Because I have family history of mental illness.

I've never done acid. I've always heard that I've, and I don't know if it's apocryphal or what, I've heard that acid, you can't OD on it or whatever, all that shit. But like one thing that can happen is that it can serve as like a catalyst or like a precursor or something to like a mental episode or whatever. And because of having the like family history and yes, having sort of a phobia. of like losing my mind, I've never fucked with it. I mean, I get that, you know, I've got family history of different types of addiction, so I worry about that.

But I don't have, as far as I know, any mental illness in my family or obvious ones. You know, I mean, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, my mom has some nerve pills. Anxiety runs deep in the Morgan clan and the birds. But DJ was talking this morning on our podcast about, you know, his dad. And he was like, yeah, it's a real fucking. fear of mine. I was like, yeah, yeah, that makes sense. Like, when you see someone that you have DNA shared with, it's like, fuck, I am. And we've all got a little bit of that in us, you know,

like the belief that will make the same mistakes or end up with the same affections. Also, people that have shit like that, some of them are. But like a lot of people, they're not, like, they ain't born that way or aren't, or are not like that for a huge chunk of their life. Right. So you're waiting on it. And then all of a sudden, they are. And then they're just why it's called snapping. Right. And then they're just never okay again. And yeah,

that's fucking terrifying. Andy's talked about that. She had a bipolar schizophrenic aunt. And when she went through depression, the worst that she'd ever had it, it happened to be around the same year. It happened to be like at 28. Right.

And her aunt went nuts at 26 or 7. I know, like, I'm not supposed to say it that way. Right. But like, it freaked her out, man. Yeah. And then that makes what you are going through worse.

Yeah. Like, I don't know if it's because I was just, just a little kid, they weren't divorced yet, whatever. I don't know for sure that my mom will, but I can, I can remember my mom not being the way my mom ultimately became. And that probably, probably about what you said, about like late 20s, maybe early 30s or whatever.

I'm 33, my sister's 30, you know. When hope leaves. Right. Yeah. Got to fill that void with something. For some people, it's pills and lunacy. I was trying to make a word play joke. polonacy but it didn't make sense but anyway i don't know this is all pretty uh heavy shit yeah

sounds like the pikes i did this morning yeah yeah heavier than we normally go well we have any lighthearted topics that we were going to cover tray i know i mean i was going to talk about politics some maybe but it's not going to get lighthearted and we don't have to do that bonjune ho my man swept a lot of the Oscars last night south korean director who seems to be a show um well and also hit cori you still there yeah there is okay safe korea is allowed to have some of those yeah well anyway he kept talking about getting drunk and shit last night and i mean why wouldn't you but he uh he also apparently formally apologized to the engravers for the academy awards for winning so many

statues and then he keep engraving his long korean name on to or whatever he apologized to that which i just thought was some like rapper shit yeah i feel like it could have been a genuine like every he's sitting there waiting because his name's so long and someone's like sorry your name's so long and unique to us and he's like yeah my bad i keep winning them and it came across as rapper like i heard some people saying that or speculating that because apparently i guess maybe his person his personality generally is such that that would be more likely but either way honestly it hits for me i don't give a shit but that that movie parasite uh i mean it's real good i haven't watched it yet and i still haven't seen it for the record my favorite quote he was on the

carpet this was before he won and someone was talking about all the nominate they were interviewing him and they were like and you're nominated for screenplay and you made this movie it's so unique it's really like what is it in your brain that like helped you know how he's asking the question and he had been using an interpreter the whole time to give these careful answers and then in almost perfect english he goes i'm a fucking weirdo and they had to beep him out he's uh yeah that translates no matter where you are he's um i respectfully because, like, they're all very different movies, which is always cool to me.

But, like, I've seen three of his movies. The host, and I thought it was real good, but not great. Snowpiercer was one of those movies that I was high when I watched it, and I was like, this is genius. And then the next day, I was like, man, that movie was dumb. I was like, what? No, that made no goddamn sense. Like, looking back on it.

But then Paraside, I thought, was wonderful. That Paraside fully subtitled and held Katie's interest throughout. And like that is, I've literally never seen that happen. Like, for a movie to even hold her interest throughout, it's got to be like pretty good either in a like spectacular way or like really fucking good like a David Fincher movie or something like Gone Girl or social network like a really well made, you know, engaging story or something to even hold her attention in the first place. but in particular one with subtitles i've never even seen i cannot think of another example other than parasite um which she loved so i mean yeah he's a uh he's an eclectic dude in general but also as a filmmaker and he uh he hits for me well i read about that movie and i was wanting to see it this was before it started garnering all this attention we're starting to get the attention

it hadn't gotten all these awards and somebody asked him about how well it was doing outside of his own culture and he said well in my travels what I've realized our shared culture is is capitalism right and our shared problems or victories are related to capitalism and I was like oh if this is well made I'm gonna like this fucking movie

oh dude the whole movie's about class class and poor people and shit but here's the thing though it's funny like it's a comedy it's another thing that's wild because like comedies don't never get no play as far as awards go but like and I didn't realize that a Comedy hasn't won best picture since, like, the 60s.

It's a genre. It has to be foreign. It's a genre bending movie, I guess, because there's a couple of scenes in it that are fucking, like, wild in a freaky way. There's definitely dramatic elements, but, like, I mean, it's fucking funny, though. Like, it's funny throughout the whole thing, and the whole thing is about poor people and rich people and, you know, just how socioeconomics affects our world or whatever. It's fucking, I mean, it's really good.

Well, Joaquin Phoenix has been on one. Every speech has gotten weirder and weird. Imagine that. That dude? Yeah, I know. Well, before, yeah, if we're going to make fun of him, let's do the caveat. I love him. I know, he's a great actor. He was raised in a cult.

Yeah. His brother died at 17, and all these crazy speeches, the core of them are being a good person. Right. But he was so rambly last night. And it's weird because I watched his Golden Globes one, which was about diversity and, like, not just giving it lip service. Yeah. And, you know, not just pretending to give black people, you know, oh, I gave them one job. It's like fucking finance their films and shit.

And it was really, it was like not just, oh, good point. It was well said. Last night, the point wasn't bad, but God, it was rambling. And then my girl Renee Zellweger did the same thing. She just kicked. And it was like, man, is she waiting on the music? The points were good. And she was being very sweet about who did she play?

Was it Judy Dent? No. So I saw that this one. I haven't seen that movie. It's just called Judy. This episode is sponsored by Blue Chew. Guys, remember the days when you were always ready to go. Let's talk about sex.

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bluechew.com. Put in promo code red. You just pay $5 shipping and your first order is free. Get you a new dick with Bluechew. That ain't his dick. Lord ain't this a night. It's just like the club. But you just can't win them on. That's my man, man, but that ain't his dick. Is it Judy? I think it's Judy Dinch? I think she's playing. Is Judy Ditch still alive?

Yes. Oh, and Judy Dinch's... There's a pile pick about Judy Dens. Yeah, that would be weird. Also, Judy Dinch spells her name with the eye at the end, and the name of that movie is Judy with a Y for sure. But I don't know anything about that movie at all.

Is it like Judy Garland? It's about Judy Garland. It's about Judy Garland. 30 years after starring in The Wizard of Oz, beloved actress and singer, Judy Garland arrives in London to perform sold-out shows at the Talk of the Town Night Club. Yeah, that's one of the nightclub. I missed.

I didn't get a screener for that one for some reason. My favorite tweet, and I should look her name up because I came here and said it, said, you guys need to go easy on Renee Zellweger. She's still in character, so she's on pills. Yeah, no, I mean, what little I know of Judy Garland's story is like all pretty fucked up. It looked like a dark movie. I'm sure it is, dude. I'm the previews.

She was like a perfect, like a prototypical example of like the way Hollywood used to, parade up until very recently, but especially like, yeah, like 10 years ago. Fuck that. Three years ago. When Weinstein went down or whatever, when Me Too started. And hell, it probably still does work that way in large part. But like, but the further back in time you go, the worse, all that gets. Right.

And she's from way back in the day. And so, like, she, like, they were, like, feeding her, like, amphetamines. And she was smoking, like, two, three packs of cigarettes a day at their command, like, to stay skinny. Then they would give her, like, other pills to make her. like eat anything. Oh, sleeping pills every night so she could like sleep at all, amphetamines and cigarettes to keep her skinny and just like doping her up

and just abusing her and fuck. I mean, it's real fucked up. And that was her, you know, whole life for the better part of it. And then I honestly don't know that Renee Zellweger's playing her like, you know, as a middle age person. And I'm saying I don't really know about that part of it, but I would imagine she had some fucking problems. Yeah. So here's a question then. She talked about representation and some other stuff too. She mostly talked about being appreciative and how Judy Garland had went through a lot of shit and blah, blah, blah. I don't think anyone should shut up and tell jokes, shut up and make movies. You should say wherever the fuck you want to say. But how do you feel specifically about award show platform speeches about, Joaquin Phoenix was about empathy and how we should all love each other. He even threw in there.

uh he said something like uh you know and not just cancel each other out really work with people and forgive them and i looked at andy like here we go and she goes yeah he's been accused of some shit so is his brother or not his brother his best friend k c a phleck because they're they're super tight boys anyway um how do you feel about that i think we all agree shut up and sing is dumb it's fucking dumb but like drew michael is a comedian i really like who uh he's uh he's the weekend update writer on s andl and he's a stand-up comment and he's a stand-up comment and he's a And he is a bit that it's circulating right now that's a little old where he talks about like how disconnected you have to be to be up there in a $5,000 suit talking about we should all be nice to each other. And he's like, then give us some fucking money.

You know, and he's like, and he compared it to like when people are like, it's bad. It's sad what happened to the Indians. Well, then give them their land back. Like, you own some land. If you feel bad about the Indians, give your land to the Indians. Okay. I'm fucking the bid up. I mean, I guess I don't say, I don't say how.

any different than shut up and saying, I guess. And, like, realistically, the award shows are, like, the Oscars and the Tonys and all that shit. Like, they're pretty, you know, we all know the deal. This is everyone coming in, putting on a nice suit, having a glass of champagne and sticking their head firmly up their own butt. Without all that, what the fuck even is the goddamn Oscar? Well, that was sort of his point is, you know, you gathered in a masturbatory ceremony. I don't think his point was shut up and make movies. It was like go make a movie about it then.

Well, I mean, whatever. It's like, I don't know. It's weird. I'm of a few minds about it. Me too. I guess first and foremost, I'm like, look, that's your moment. Right. Like, say whatever to fuck you want to say.

And if other people don't like it, then fuck them. Like, who gives a fuck what they think about what you have to say? Yeah, that's your end zone dance. But I can go for. Right. Yeah, do whatever you want, as far as I'm concerned. I'm never going to say anybody can't do it. Well, what will you do?

Well, I haven't given as much thought. to it as you do. I don't know. I mean, I'll definitely be prepared when the time comes. That was nothing that bothered me about walking Phoenix. I'm like, bro,

if you're going to talk about this shit, write it out. Yeah. Your job is to memorize lines and deliver them compellingly. Do that right now. I definitely think I'll stick to something like very, you know, personal or whatever because what I was just about to say is,

I also agree with what Ricky Jervais said at the Golden Globes about being like, no one on earth is less qualified to talk about this shit than you motherfuckers so get your ward shut the fuck up you know whatever and it's like he you know he was roasting

him he was smit dunking on them and I'd hit for me and I dug it and I generally agree with what he's saying but I also at the same time like I said somebody has this like Corey said it's their end zone dance and they want to dedicate it to like a cause of theirs or whatever then

I mean, fuck, it's fine. Like, what's the problem with that? It's better than not doing that. Like, I understand the whole, like, why don't you put your money where your mouth is, but, like, they could just do neither. So I'm about saying, on that note, a lot of them do, like, it depends on which one you're talking about,

but so many of those people do so much more charity and that type of work than your average person ever does. So they deserve that, too. Let me ask it a different way. If your goal is to change hearts and minds, and knowing how that often gets received, Right. That's a good point in my opinion. Most people roll their eyes at that shit. Right. Do you think it's a good, do you think it's a good play?

Okay. No, probably not. Because I don't think, yes. I don't, I mean, dude, I, again, I agree with most of those, like, causes and things they say, I'm fans of these artists or whatever. But when I see these clips and they do it, I'm sitting there making the jerk off most. I literally did that to Andy three times. It's just like, go, here we fucking go. What King Phoenix said, Joaquin Phoenix was talking about empathy, and he was talking about people and, you know, this and that and different cultures.

And then he goes, and the cows that we eat, and then we force them to give the milk that's for their babies, and then he looked at me, and I'm just going, ah, ah. But here's the deal, though, man, and I'm with you, too. Like, I haven't watched this particular one yet.

I was, you know, I was waiting for the highlights. But when I watch those shows, I find myself, you know, just sitting there doing the jerk off motion the whole time. But, like, it hits for me to see stuff that makes me want to make the jerk off motion, if that makes sense. Yeah, it's compelling.

Like, at least you're making me feel shit. I love how fucking, yeah, I love how raven it is. And so, you know, to me, like,

if they stop doing that shit, we ain't, nobody's going to be tweeting about it and nobody's going to be watching it just so later they can call her by liberal fags. You know who, that's the whole point. You know who the godfather of all that was?

The guy who sent the Native American woman? The godfather. Yeah, Marlon Brando, who sent a Native American woman to take, to accept his award. in his stead as a statement about the treatment of the Native Americans or whatever. And that was the first, like, big high profile one of those.

And, like, people at the time were fucking pissed and whatever. But, like... Also, butt raped a lady with butter on set. That's true, yeah. Got a whole thing. Well, I don't... Okay. Yeah.

He didn't... When you say raped her with butter, my Lord, I don't want to... These are not hairs that I would care to split. But he didn't... An accusation wasn't that he, that he, like, raped her, right? It was that to... I thought the excitation was, you know, they were like, we're going to do this scene, and him and the director were like,

we're really going to do it. That's the best way to do it. Like, penetrated her? Like, I don't think... Let's not get in the way. Yeah, right. Let's not go to the end. Maybe, maybe not.

You can look it up. He's dead. Yeah. Right. Let's not do this with butter, please. All right. Let's not cancel butter. God damn it.

Corey's out. Corey's out on the progressive movement if we fucking cancel butter and that's rolling in any rites. Um, What I was going to say is, oh, I think where I'm arrived from our conversation right now is if you are going to do that, prepare. You can say, well, I just didn't know if I was going to win. Like, you had a one in five chance. Yes. I don't care if I ever get nominated for anything.

A fucking webby or whatever. Like, that's just how I'm wired. Like, I'm going to be prepared for the eventual. Even if I'm convinced, like, I got no shot in hell. it ain't no way I'm going to allow myself to end up up there and not be prepared for what I'm going to say because I was like I ain't getting up here and looking like a fucking dumbass you know like I just cannot I can't fathom that mentality of not having some because I get like a lot of people spin it like you just said like they try to spin it's like well you know like it's humility to not be prepared because I never thought I would win but no I'm with you dude that's bullshit if you if you're one of five nominees like fucking have something readied man. Especially because here's kind of my take on it a little bit. So like when you go up there and you champion a cause and you look like you're smelling

your own farts, there's going to be people doing the jerk off motion and there's going to be people being like who, you know, like Ricky Jervis Rost and you're like, what gives you the right? You're the least qualified person talking about this. However, on the opposite end, if you go up there and just go, thank you very much. It's an honor and leave. There's going to be just as many people going like, you had a platform to. do something and you didn't do it, you

piece of shit. And I'd rather be on the end of the one fucking pitch for it. I don't know. The one acceptance speech that I personally have seen passed around the most so far was Adam Sandler's and he didn't do, he just did a different type of thing, made it funny, acknowledge it. He was self-deprecating

and doing it. He wasn't an Oscars though. I know that, but I'm just saying like you. Let me I don't, I think, I think it's perfectly okay to go up there and have a standard acceptance speech that covers all the typical basis without using it as any kind of soapbox. And if you just go up there and say, thanks, appreciate it, then yes, people are going to be like,

oh, he's unappreciative or he's whatever. But if you just do your standard thing, no one's going to say anything about it at all. I don't think anybody's going to drag you for it. They're just going to let it go. Well, they will, but it won't be the majority. Well, let me say this. I said of that because I was going to say, when Joaquin made that Golden Globe speech about not just giving diversity lip service, but actually funding black films and

Hispanic films and not just like hiring them for one job or whatever it got shared and people were like holy shit this is great and and i was expecting to go on twitter just now and find people being like damn he kind of got rambly there and it and it was going to prove my point in my head of like see you just prepare if you're going to get on a soapbox be ready the for fucking twitter reviews which is you know can be a nightmare are pretty fucking positive there's like a lot of people being like they felt like it felt more authentic and genuine the fact that like it was coming from the heart or whatever like here's a lady talking about like, look, you can fake that though, you know.

Right. Especially if you walk him. Yeah, yeah, exactly. He won an award for being able to do that. Yeah, right. Well, hell, maybe he did. Maybe he did fake it. That would rule.

Maybe he did prepare all that. Like, remember when he pretended to go crazy? That's why he's friends with KCIF. And everyone bought it on earth when it was first happening because he's a great actor. Or he went crazy and that was a brilliant way to get out of it. Right, yeah. Yeah. Who knows?

Who could know? Joaquin. One guy, and he ain't telling. And if he did. I like for K-Fabe to remain intact on this situation. Yeah. Well, he also ended with a reference to his brother, and he read a lyric from one of his brother's songs, and whether he fate that or not, it crushed.

I mean, even at the time, I stopped doing the jack-off motion, you know what I mean, to cry, which usually those go hand-in-hand for me. Right. Yeah. All right. All right. We got more of the Oscars than I expected to. Yeah, I like where that went.

It was good. It was a good little clip. Good little clip errors that won't hit for nobody. Speaking of the things it won't hit for nobody, the XFL debuted this weekend. The Bally Hood Return. Yeah. It got 3.3 million viewers in its first game.

That's pretty good, right? It is by our standards today, which is all that matters. That's actually more than Raw. gets um but importantly in 2001 with xFL originally debuted um they had like 14 15 million

you cannot compare to 2020 numbers to 2001 numbers and that's not what I'm doing what's important is they debuted at like 14 15 million and then in week two fell off a cliff right so like 3.3 ain't bad at all it's not bad at all um but let's see how

like sustains or whatever. My beloved Los Angeles Wildcats lost by 20. Pretty bummed out about that. Yeah, my Tampa Bay Vipers didn't do well either. Dude, okay, I've said this to y'all like privately or whatever, but I don't give a shit to say this out in the open. The fucking, who lands on the fucking wildcats for a brand new sports franchise in 2020? Especially when it's the extreme football league.

And it's, you know, part, it's like from the wrestling guy. And their whole thing is being rad, at least ostensibly it should be. Like. And in L.A. And it's L.A. Right. And you're the fucking wild. Dude, I was so disappointed.

They're called mountain lines out here. Also, Wildcat has a pretty cool history in the United States only in the mountain area where it's like fucking people who fought literal. Yeah, wildcatters. Yeah. Yeah, I just mean that like... No, I'm with you. Were there not a million high school teams named Wildcats in your region? But it made sense in my region.

I know that, but I'm just saying like, it just... It's bullshit. It's stupid. When I found out, I was like, okay, there's eight teams, XFL, I'm a huge football fan. I'm going to give it a shot. Yeah. Whereas D.C. Defenders rad. D.C. Defenders is rad. And they won.

They got Cardell Jones who's hit for me. Vipers ain't bad. They're not battle hawks is okay. The Wildcats is far away the worst one. Anyway. Rough necks. Roughnecks is kind of, eh. When I, when, I like roughnecks. There were eight teams.

No, I don't. Tennessee doesn't have a team. I live in Los Angeles. I was like, I'll do the LA team. But I don't even know what their mascot is. And I looked it up and I got genuinely like mad about it. I looked, I was like, that can't be right. Are you shitting the wildcats?

But that's what the rattles or the rattlesnakes. You think there's a little bit about how much you hate Kentucky that's kind of giving you a bias? Yeah, so still don't hit No, that's fine No, that's fine At least their name makes it They're also a neighboring county For my county

They used to be in our region for years But then they grew and we didn't And so they got their three A They ain't been in our region in forever But they're the Wildcats And they're blue and white Livingston Academy They're the L.A. Wildcats

And they do not hit in Solana So like So you know There we go. Yes, okay, but Thompson, and I didn't see this, but Thompson told me the other day I was going in on Thompson about, not going in on Thompson, going in to Thompson about this exact subject. And he told me that Steve Levy, who's, you know, a sportscaster guy who is one of the XFL's like commentators, he's like their A team, right? And so he's like one of their main voices. And Thompson said he was on some sports show that Thompson's listens to promoting the debut of the XFL.

and he went in on how shitty of a name it was. In his official capacity as like a spokesman, Thompson said it was basically like he's time to hype everybody up about it. It's going to be great. You're going to love it. And it was basically like, if there's one thing I will say, it's that Wildcats is a fucking terrible name for a, you know. So like, you know, it ain't just, I don't think it's just me.

They could change it next year. I am biased. They're still around and they aort. What should it be? Yeah, rattlers ain't bad. I don't know. There's a lot of rattlesnakes in the hills around here. I don't even know if they're native, but they're all over the place now.

You've got to worry about that if you walk your dog a lot in the hills like I do. I don't know. Felons. Superstars. Superstars. The stars. Boardwalk. The boardwalk empire.

There you go. The Empire. There you go. L.A. Empire. I've always, I've always, I've always, I've always, I've always, I've fixed it. There it is. XFL. I think, get with it.

I think New York is the Empire State, so some people might be like, well, we wouldn't want to copy New York. Yeah, but they got the inland empire out here. That's true. They could hang it on that. But there's the... The smog. I've always liked the mascots that are, that don't have an S on it, that are not plural. Do you know what I mean?

Like the Tulane Green Wave or like that type of shit. A Cardinal. Yeah, that's always hit for me. The tide. I like the... You just had to say that. I don't make it not hit. I wish to be my mom partard over here.

I'm upset at myself now. Nothing hits. Nothing does hit. I backed into saying, they hit i can't believe i did that anyway yeah the empire who gives a fuck so i had a i had a couple how about traffic yeah yeah yeah the la traffic there you go the the the la uh killed three people in traffic shot himself yeah the we can't anybody go postal the dream wait who's the dream that's a wmba team where they maybe he's i don't know the dream was a team of that's a high dream yeah

yeah yeah i know it's doing it's actually doing quite well now that wouldn't they've got a pretty big international audience of ladies. It was a joke for a long time. But now they're pretty, like, they make money. I just found it as that. Do you know, you know Jamil Johnson? Yeah. Jamel's a big WNBA fan, and he told me about that.

Really? I know he was a basketball guy. I didn't know he was a WNBA fan specifically. Did you know he was a basketball guy or did you know he was fat? I mean black. I mean, both. No, we literally talked about it. Remember I went to the blue rooster?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I went to the Blue Rooster with you and he was there, and we were talking about the Grizzlies and the NBA and stuff. And he talked about he's got that podcast or whatever. So, no, I genuinely did know that he's a basketball guy, although I did know those other things, too. He's who told me that. But this is a bit of a change of pace, but I'm curious.

Did we replace going postal with something? I think people just don't. I think people stopped saying that because, like, it kept happening so much. It was just like, oh, we can't, we can't have this little euphemism. It's not fun anymore. Yeah, right. It ain't fun.

Yeah, exactly. I mean, I genuinely think it's like nowadays, whenever you see someone that kind of looks crazy, I mean, so long as they're all so white, you're like, oh, goddamn, they look like a school shooter. Whereas used to people would say, man, they look like they're about to go postal. So I think, honestly, it's school shooter. Well, that won't work for L.A., but all right, what about the Los Angeles road rage? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, I mean, I think. Or the LA Rage, that's pretty good. The Rage. That's a great name for this team out here. Yeah, the L.A. Rage. There's like, again, X-F-L, I think they should have shit like they should have a team called the Rage. No, no, the Rage, like, they should have shit like that.

When they first did it, and I know it was a huge failure the first time, but I don't think this is why. My team was the Memphis Maniacs, and it was spelled M-A-A-A-X. Like they Some of they got cheesy though That's too far I'm not suggesting They need to start spelling things With X's again

We're past that as a society Thank God But like You still got Monster Energy Drank out there Living the Dream For line beards But they should

They should embrace Some of that though More than I feel like They are doing so far That's just my opinion I think there's a happy medium And I agree with you Yeah

Corey Well no that's like We was talking yesterday I was watching the fucking game and I was like, God damn, this old boy just got ejected for throwing a punch. That should be fucking par for the course. You should get five, but you should have to play 10 and 11 for two minutes. Yeah, put them in the penalty box.

That's a great idea. If you take your helmet off, yes, that's one thing. But he punched a dude in the helmet. Like, that hurt him more than it hurt that other motherfucker. Like, why are he leaving the game? Fuck that shit. Put him in a box. Let them come back in like 10 minutes.

Four downs, 10 on 11. Dude, a penalty box analog and football is, that's a really, real interesting idea. Two downs or four downs? I'd say two downs. Then let him come out and get the hot tag. Depends on the penalty. That's true.

Yeah. There you go. Depends on the penalty. Yeah. How bad he punched that muckucker. I think you could expand it. Any personal foul. Any personal file.

Because you know, there's different kinds of unnecessary roughness, rough in the passer, all that type of shit. Yeah. Any personal foul, put them in a fucking penalty box. Everything. And now you're short-hand. Good. Yeah.

Pussy. You got them pussy-fied shit. here now. Here's two things about the league, one of which I really love and one of which don't hit for me. So I don't care for, like, they're doing this thing that, like, right before the play, they're hearing the, you hear the coach, like, yell out the play to the team and shit like that. That don't hit for me.

But what does hit for me about the being miked up situation is that they're just interviewing players the second they get off the field. Oh, dear. They're interviewing coaches right after something crazy happened. And we were talking about this the other day. that shit will be gone after week three but until then my god we're going to hear some fucking awesome shit hell the first game dude dropped to f bomb this girl went up to interview him she's like so what was the thinking on that he's like i was just trying to do my fucking job yeah dude

there's like that there is a zero percent chance that that survives the season because it's like it's just a matter of time dude till somebody just is too fired up and just drops every kind of bomb there is. You know, verbal, verbal bomb. F bomb, M. BOM, all the bombs. John M. Bomb. The Bintel state that these dudes are in, like, these are guys who are having to play in the XFL. They're not necessarily happy about that.

So, like, they're really going out there and laying it all on the line is they're, like, fucking last chance you situation. So you put a mic in that motherfucker's face after somebody had just, you know, held him and they didn't get a hell to go off. They've had a lot of concussions. They have. They have. What do y'all think about this?

I don't know if they've even broach this. yet although you'd think they would have. Let them have knives. Let let kids who don't want to go to college play in the XFL. I don't think they can keep them from doing that right now as long as they can't keep it. As long as the XFL

has to allow it. 18 year olds or whatever. Yeah, it's up to the XFL. Nobody else can stop. I'm against it. I'm against it. I don't have a scientific reason why. I mean, okay. There's a legit difference in your and there was a lot of evidence about this that the NFL took into factor when it made the rules that it made. If you're 18 and you're playing the NBA, you are going to get beat up more than when you're 25, but it's not going to like fucking hopefully ruin your career.

And by the way, the NBA limits how much 18-year-olds play because of this science. Like your bodies, you're just not fully physically done yet and you're not even close to mentally done as a man. I think our brain starts forming at 25. Right. But yes. And you're probably right. and that's probably just the end of the discussion. But don't you think... The XFL don't give a fuck about science? Right.

Well, also, don't... Like, there are some exceptions. Like, Rahim Moore, who is the second round pick of the Broncos and who blew that Joe Flacco Hell Mary play in the playoffs when Peyton was there, and the Ravens beat him or whatever. That was Rahm Moore who fucked that up. That's all I remember him for. But he was like...

He played in the league for a while. So he's now like... He got drafted in 2011. He's like a nine-year vet. He would be if he was still in the NFL, but he's not. He's now on the NFL. the XFL. He had like two picks the other day. There are guys like that.

But a whole lot of the XFL players, and I think more and more, are going to be the, like, the younger guys who didn't make it through training camp or whatever. Do you know what I mean? Like that type of situation. And it's, it's like, if there's, if this was

the thing that started happening, I think you would also get more and more, I don't think they would be going up against other grown up against, Luke Keekley, right, yeah. They're not going to be lining up against, you know, the big bad motherfuckers that are like in the NFL. It's going to be a lower level of competition and maybe more comparable to what college already is in the first place.

Well, how long is the season and how long are the games? I think the season is, I think it's like 10 weeks, 10 to 12 weeks. All right. 10 weeks. Because that's part of it. You got to do 16 in the league if you don't go to the playoffs. Right. And like, you know, there's a reason that a lot of freshmen, no matter how Ballyhoo,

they are don't play when they get to college. Well, part of it is that they ain't coming to their own as fucking men. The other thing, the thing that's really going to fuck that up, this whole proposition up is there's just no way the XFL can compete with the salaries that, like, the SEC pays. That's true. To these big name, to these big name players, you know. I guarantee you Aaron Murray made more at Georgia than he makes for the fucking Vipers. Yeah.

Well, dude, and on that note, too, just to be fair about how the culture works in the NBA such scenario, you could go to China and make upwards of three or four million dollars and very few people do it even and just go to college for a year. Because I remember when Brandon Jennings did that was a big deal. He was like the first blue chip guy to say, fuck college, I'm going to go get paid, and then I'll come back and get paid more here. And I remember that being like there was E60 shit on it and whatever. And it's like, this is going to be a paradigm shift or whatever.

But that hasn't really happened though, right? Yeah. Why not? Well, there's a few reasons. One, you can't hide your flaws over there. You're in a professional atmosphere. So if you're great, you could really raise your stock in the draft or keep it the same if you're already a top ten pick.

But if you're not, you're going to go over there and you're going to get exposed by actual fucking pros. The notion that you're going to go around and ball out on these Chinese League motherfuckers is dumb. There are grown-ass men over there. Starbury. He's still over there, right? Yeah, probably. Trajan-Layman. You also go immediately lose your eligibility.

For NCAA, you mean? Yeah, so like you could, like if you went over there and did shit the bed, like, there's no backwards going. You might not even be shit in the bed. Right, and you might not even shit the bed. Their whole system and philosophy in most of those leagues is very different than NBA. When Ricky Rubio was a superstar over there, he was still playing about half of the game. They sub in and out five at a time. They've got a very soccer mentality about it.

And it keeps their kids fresh because they play 16-year-olds and shit. But like Trayson Langdon was over there in China. He made like 20 million a year or some shit He was one of their superstars You remember him he played at Duke? They called him the Alaskan Assassin Yeah He had plenty of opportunity to play in the league

He wasn't like washed out The league was like you can play here For like 8 million a year And he decided at some point Well fuck that I'm gonna go be a superstar I make 25 My point is that dude is legit Right

Like Brandon Jennings was great But like if you're not really on top of your game You're gonna get exposed And a lot of people Still here would say You know what You're gonna develop more in a year in college.

You can develop well in China in five years because you'll go through their farm system. They'll start you with a coach. But if they give you $4 million to go over there as a 19 year old or an 18 year old, they expect you to play right then. And if you're suck, they're going to cut you or bury you on the end of the bench.

They know you're gone next year. They're not going to make you better. Also, not for nothing. There's a fucking huge difference just in the mentality of like an 18-year-old leaving their hometown and going like, you know, four or five hours away

to some Ohio school, than there is like, I'm 18 and I'm going to fucking China. Right. Well, the thing is, if you're 18 years old and you're that good. I don't mentally fuck all your shit up. Right. If you're 18 years old and you're that good at basketball, what the NBA wants is for you to develop for a year.

And what they say to people, whether it's true or not, and this is why kids are staying, is you're going to develop better in the college game. And the reason why is they're going to develop you more. They're going to let you play. You're going to be the big man on campus. You're going to learn what it's like to fill that pressure. Whereas if you go over there to China,

they know you're there for a year. There's no development going on. As good as you are as what we need you to be this year. The colleges know you're there for a year too, but you're saying that this culture is different. And they need to develop you throughout that year because you're their horse that they're trying to ride into the NCAA tournament.

Well, again, we got into this conversation by talking about, is this going to ever happen with the XFL? And, like, I think I agree that it's probably pretty unlikely, which leads me to my ultimate conclusion about the XFL. It would hit for me if there was a competitive alternative as far as football goes. But I just don't see how it's ever going to happen. Because all this shit we just said about,

because that was one thing I saw somebody bring up, is like, well, what if it becomes a situation where some of the best high school recruits are skipping college and they're playing in the XFL for a few years? That could maybe make it hit. And I was like, ooh, that's an interesting proposition. But now we've talked about it. And I agree.

Maybe they doled out like four-year contracts. That'd be the only way I could see it. I agree that that's probably pretty unlikely. And outside of that, how is it ever going, Literally, anytime you ever have a star who hits, like, they're gone. Like, they're leaving the next year going to the NFL, like, every single time. Levi-on-bell. That's the only way I could see it happen.

What do you mean? Like somebody holding out and they were holding out and they just go to the XFL to play. And they're big enough to take eyes. But I don't think in football there's anybody that exists like that. Maybe a Brady or Manning, but that'll never happen with them. No, it won't. Right. It happened when the U.S.F.L.

back in the day that Donald Trump, like, murdered or whatever. fucking weird story. But anyway, when that was a thing, was it Steve Young or John L? Steve Young? Who was it? Steve Young, right? Who, like, he, he chose them over the NFL,

which was a big deal, but they were able to offer, like, a competitive contract at the time. Yeah. And it still didn't work out. But, like, dude, the XFL, they can't, they cannot do that. No. Like, they cannot compete. completely different business model.

They're not even right now attempting to compete. This is a continuation of the football season. I don't even think in Vince McMahon's wildest years, even if this was still a thing 10 years from now, would he ever think, oh, we'll have it congruent with the NFL season. Like, that's not going to fucking happen. Right. But what is, it's just have it be good enough so that people keep watching so it remains profitable. And that's it.

It has to be. Yeah, like we're, because right now they're not competing with the NFL because the NFL, because the NFL ain't fucking on right now. Like, it's just like, hey, we're going to get the market of people who want to watch football so bad, and football's not going on right now. And the deal is, if they suck, then even us, people who love football are going to be like, fuck this. But if they can just maintain a 78% hit level, then like, yeah, I'll fucking keep watching it. But I don't, man, dude, no, there's no way he can.

It's just like AEW on, like wrestling competing with WWE. They're not competing with WWE. They are just trying to. carve out their own little thing. Like they're, they're not, AEW doesn't compete with, uh,

WWE, Raw or SmackDown. They compete with W. W. W. NXT, which is W. W.

W. W.E.'s fucking like, minor league shit. Right. And they know that. Like in their minds, they've never thought, we're going to fucking come in there and beat Raw.

They know they're not. They just hope that they can be a thing that when Rawl's not on and Smackdown's not on. People be like, well, this is pretty good. I'll watch that. Right on. Well,

I guess we'll see what happens. Go Wildcats. I'm going on my rage. It's hilarious that both of our teams lost. Yeah, of court, dude, they're going to go winless. LA is like that. You're the Vipers story? They're both favored too.

I did that thing. What did you said? You're the Vipers, right? Yeah. I did that thing where Snapchat does a, and you just, like, ESPN Snapchat, and it said to screen cap it, and I landed on the D.C. defenders. They look good. They did, but I think I might switch to L.A. just because I don't really have any LAT.

I kind of like the clippers that I love LeBron James, but I don't really give a fuck about any LATs. I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I don't. I'm probably going to switch to the D.C. defenders, honestly, because they were, they were, honestly, my first choice, because I was like, man, I fucking love Cardale. Yeah. But then I saw Aaron Murray. Then I saw Aaron Murray was going to Tampa Bay. And I was like, well, fuck, I can get to Tampa Bay. There's an Allegiant flight for 40 bucks.

And Aaron Murray's a dog. But, like, honest to God, I like Cardell more anyways. Like, he's the dude. And D.C. is my favorite city. Unless it's to. I don't think. Go ahead. I'm saying right now, like, you know, that's the one good thing about the XFL is like, you don't have to just

pick a team and just be like, well, fuck, I said I'm a Vipers fan, so whatever. Like, that's the one thing that's kind of hard about it is because when you're starting like a new league and shit, there's no built-in allegiance to anything unless you actually live in the fucking city. So, like, I don't know, it's a whole thing. It's just hard.

Like, tradition's such an important part of all sports and this has none, so it feels weird. Also, betting. And I think once people understand how better to bet on it, will also help it. On the tradition note, does Conrad give a shit about this since it's associated with it wrestling?

No. Not anymore than just like, oh, whatever, this is new football. He probably is interested in the numbers and shit and betting. The reason I asked is, unless it's to prove me wrong and what I'm about to say, I would bet $100 right now, Corey Forster will never go to an XFL football game. I'm not taking that bet because I agree with you. Well, you started talking about $40 flights and I was like, oh, yeah, we could go to the game. And then I was like, I'm not going to go to the day.

game i might go to one out here maybe but i live here he'd have to fly to Tampa bay actually i'm starving so I'm gonna go but we're gonna talk about how much they are look they're cheap here's here's the way here's the way that i'll go if fucking i talked to jerry brisco and jerry's like hey I'm in town and there's an xFL game and me i get to go hang out with jerry briscoe and Tampa bay and go the game then i'll fucking go he old he's gonna be dead soon you better hurry yeah don't i hope if you're listening this jerry that was drew I think you're still young And I think you're still young

And we'll very much be alive forever And could still whip my ass I also think he doesn't know Which one of us is who All righty well On that note I love you Jerry Bye

Bye Bye Bye Corey Thank you all for listening to the well-read show We'd love to stick around longer But we got to go Tune in next week If you got nothing to do

Thank you God Bless your good night and skew