wellRED podcast - #186 - Words are Weird, Drew Moved, CHO Got Booed In Kansas!

Episode Date: September 16, 2020

The boys are back together after a mixed cast the past few weeks. They discuss offensive words and talk about Drew's recent move back home to Tennessee!

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion, because you used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie. I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say.

Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better.

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any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that. Also, a fun one I'd said it before, but I had a, I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friends' faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got, I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies, you know, those weren't a little like the cue ball looking twin fellas. Yeah. So that was that response to?

What was that a reply gift for just when I did something stupid? Something fat and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten. If it wasn't for Rocket Money, I never would have even figured it out. So shout out to them. They help. If you're money dumb like me, Rocket Money can help.

So cancel your unwanted subscriptions or reach your financial goals faster with RocketMoney. Go to RocketMoney. com slash well-read today. That's RocketMoney. money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast. They're the. Hello everybody. It is your boy the show, Corey Ryan Forster. Welcome to the well read podcast. This podcast is brought to you by our other podcasts.

We're starting to sound like those like a Portlandia sketch. Where this is our podcast and you should check out our other podcasts and those podcasts are about podcast and we learn them from a podcast about podcasts. But we do have other podcasts that we're super proud of and we're trying to keep going for you guys during these weird times. The podcasts are as follows, the sister podcast, the spin-offs, if you will. We've got Evening Skews with Trey Crowder. We've got Into the Abiscuit with Drew Morgan.

And my new one, through the screen door with Corey Ryan Forster, you can get evening skews here on the Well-Red feed. Into the Abisket is on its own separate feed. Go look that up. and also through the screen door on its separate feed. You can get it at screendoorpod.com as well if you're not somebody that's into apps. This podcast here is brought to you this week by your boy's brand new merch store over at below the collar.com slash the buttercream dream. That's where you can go get you a buttercream dream dream t-shirt for you or your papaw or your mamaw for their birthday, whatever.

It makes a great gift. So yeah, appreciate you guys supporting us during these. weird times and we hope you guys are saying stay safe i hope you're saying stave but i also hope you're staying safe and i also hope that you enjoy this podcast skew they're the liberal rednecks they like cornbread but sex they care way too much but don't give a fun they're the liberal rednecks that makes some people upset but they got three big old dicks that you can suck Yeah, 100%. Amber, your phone's going off in here.

Your alarm's going off. Oh, damn. Take your pills or whatever it is. What is it? Call in your pills. I know you had something to do with pills. Well, here we are. Here we are.

How long did it take you to get across the country, Drew? We did it in almost eight days. we spent for you in Yellowstone and we went to Minneapolis and saw a friend. Damn. You went up to Minneapolis to then go down to Tennessee from L.A.? Yeah. Because for Minneapolis to where you are is probably, what, 17 hours? I'd say more than that.

Yeah. Don't hit. Wait, you're talking about, wait, wait, you're talking about Morton County? Yeah. Oh, it's, yeah, it's 15. I thought you meant from L.A. to Minneapolis. No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm at from Minneapolis.

Cho, do you know that because of that time, you and DJ went up to Minnesota and back in the same night? Yes. Well, that's not possible. You went up there and then straight back. In this 30-something hours. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true. Won't you elaborate on that? Well, that seems real dumb.

Oh, dude, it was real dumb, but, well, as you said, though, it was me and DJ. So, well, DJ, so this is back in, I want to say this is, what am I, I'm about to be 33. We're inching up on this being like almost 10 years ago at this point, because I was probably 24, 25. And DJ had, I think he, I don't know what, but DJ started getting some club work. I don't remember how it was. He was in a contest. Yeah, it was. He was in a contest, but then a funny business folk.

And so he was going to, and this was actually Rochester, not Minneapolis, but like in my brain, It's like, it's Minnesota. Same thing, even though Minnesota's big. So DJ got a weekend, or not a weekend, a one-night gig at Goonies Comedy Club in Rochester, Minnesota. And I remember they were going to pay him $200. And I know, but like both of us at the time were like, stage time, bro, and not, like, not at the comedy catch. And like, you're going to, you know what I mean? Looking back, like, it could not be more dumb because it's like, God damn, for

that we could have just went to the local VFW or karaoke bar and just set up our own goddamn show. Like they'd love to have us, you know. Well, also to get not and I don't want to get into kind of shit slinging or nothing. I don't have an interest in it, but you said it was funny business, right? And I'm pretty sure it was. That was that whole type of thing was like, you fuck them. Their whole entire deal.

Like that's how they operate and you every, every comic did it. Like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They never really turn them. No, I mean, like, low-level comics who didn't that, you know,

well, and that's the, didn't have other opportunities. They all would say yes, and it was always shit like that. It was like, we'll pay you $150 to do one night in a town you never heard of. That you can't afford to get to. Yeah, like that's not all their shit was. And so there's part of me that. Maybe I got lucky, but I feel like I did one with them in like South. Like, I mean, that's still like six or seven hours.

Yeah, I mean, they do have rooms that exist. they're more like a northeastern or not just the north situation whereas like in the south it's the it wouldn't i say just i don't think i'm not talking about midwest yeah but yeah yeah up there yeah i thought that was the word you were searching for and you were like just the north situation that's you're exactly 100% right but uh usually like the zone they're the zones of the midwest really um But yeah, man, like, there was part of me that used to be like, you'd see that gig come in, then the party you goes, well, fuck it at stage time. And then you'd hear comics bitching about it.

And part of me was like, well, I mean, it's not like you have to do the gig. You know, if you don't want to do a gig, don't do the gig. But now that I'm older and it's like, dude, it's, okay, that's obviously accurate. But like, it's so predatory. They know that these young comics will fucking do it. They don't have to pay them shit. So, like, it is bullshit. But regardless of-

Great comedians in Minnesota. Yeah, absolutely. They had already ran through them. Yeah, and like, in part, I know all, I know how these bookers work. A lot of them are just like, well, that's just paying your dues. You know, we're assholes to you so that you can prove that. So you can prove that what? That will, that you've just got your thumb.

Right, yeah, right, that you've got your thumb on us because you know that we want to do this thing and we will absolutely do it for free, actually losing money. So DJ, he was talking about having this gig and I was like, dude, that's fucking awesome. and he was like, well, buddy, I can't get up to goddamn Rochester. First off, I barely drive. Secondly, if I do, I got a fucking Scooby-Doo van, you know, yada, yada, yada. And so he talked, he talked them into, he talked them into giving me a guest set eight minutes. I did, you know, 20.

He talked them into giving me a guest set, which would make it worth it for me to drive, right? So I was like, I was like, fuck yeah, man. What was he doing, middling? yeah he was middling yeah yeah yeah yeah midland is a it was a good word to describe our attitudes um that's uh that's redneck redlin is middling yeah we don't feature we fair to middling um so so yeah yeah and i can't remember who who was a fucking i can't remember who was a headliner um but all i know is i was like i was so pumped i was like shit yeah man and he and dj was like dude man you know we'll take my whole $200, Drew gone.

I'm going. I'm here. Oh, okay. Hey, DJ was like, we'll take my whole $200 and we'll just put it in the gas tanks. I was like, all right. So we start looking and we're like, how damn, it's 18 hours there. And then I was like, what are we going to do about a fucking hotel? And he's like, ah, hell, we'll sleep in the car.

We'll figure it out. And I was like, all, whatever. So we drive up there. We time it out to where we pretty much made it in time to do the gig. Like, we drove the 18 hours straight. We had about an hour to spare. We got there. We do the gig.

This is really fun. We go out and we're pumped up, you know, so we're like, let's go, just go drink. Let's go get a drink. And then finally we're like, we ain't going to get no goddamn hotel. And it was a little, like once we got a little buzzed up and we're in a city, both of us being the country bumpkins that we are started feeling like, man, it's one thing to park your car to make, you know, like a McDonald's or a Walmart and go to sleep like in Georgia. But like, this is different. Like, I don't want to sleep in my car here.

So we decided drunk as fuck. to just drive back home. I can't remember if it was this trip or the Salina, Kansas trip, that we, either way, I'm going to tell it here, is that I know on one of those trips, we were so tired and we were looking for like any type of drugs to snort, and we didn't have any meth, and we didn't have any adderol,

but in a bag that I had borrowed from my dad, because that's how fucking broken, miserable I was. I had to borrow a duffel bag to go on a trip. My dad had some extends, which was boner pills. And me and DJ was just like, hell, buddy, they got to have a fedron in them.

So we snorted boner pills and just drove decks out the whole trip. But yeah, but yeah, man, like we just, we did that, drove straight up there and straight back. And then I remember when we got back, DJ had a huge dispute with this, we had taken Dre's, his wife,

Dre, I guess what, whatever, it's Dre. common law at this point common law yeah for sure um that's only law he has on his side um so we i remember that dj we were like man we got no money for drinks he's like oh fuck it we'll put it on dray's card you know blah blah blah blah i's like all so so we did and then he we get back and he's got like he calls me he's like buddy did we get a cab while we's in minnesota and i was like a cab shit no we drove the whole that'd been smart of course we didn't get a cab so We walked around drunker and shit looking for cocaine so we could drive 18 hours home. And he's like, well, I've got this goddamn bill on my, on my Andre's credit card for like hundreds of dollars from gypsy cab company.

And we're like, god, so he calls. This is when he came up with a term pleading red. He pled red to this credit card company. And they gave him all his money back because he's like, I didn't have no getting no goddamn, you know, cab, blah, blah, blah, anyways, he gets all his money back. And then we find out later that we was just so drunk, we didn't realize that the, bar we'd been drinking in was called the gypsy cab company. So we got a free bar tab and use that $200 for gas.

So, I mean, you know, all in all, win, win. I didn't have a great set. Yeah, I was going to ask how the actual show was. It was weird, man. Like, it was the first time. It was a club. It was a club. It was a C room or whatever.

Probably. But, I mean, I don't know how their rooms. It might have been the A room in fucking Rochester, that area for all I know. All I remember was, was the all. of my jokes worked, but the audience, it was like they would, as soon as the joke was over, they would be like, ha, ha, ha, and then clap and be like, all right, next, you know what I mean, there was no lingering. I don't know. It was, and I've played places in the Midwest before that it seems more like, whereas like in the South, there's more roaring laughter because everybody's just

drunk and Yehaw and and and skewing and throwing bottles and stuff. It's very much, it felt more like a play. And that was like the first time I'd ever performed outside the South. So it was different. And also, I mean, can't stress enough, I had just driven 18 hours straight with DJ in the car. I was worn out. You know, it's weird. Me and Andy, pretty much the same story. I can see that. Yeah.

But you're there now. You're home now. Are you enjoying it? Are you happy to be back in, what's your, in your experience? Because you're the only one of us, too, that have experienced the pandemic in two, completely different spots. Well, I mean, you have pretty much summed up the not giving a fuck of small town red ass America.

I went to Walmart earlier and it was about, they had a sign up, you know, in Jamestown, Tennessee, you have to wear a mask. I'd say it's about 50-50. Yeah. You know, and I do wonder what it would be like. Like my aunt, my mom was telling a story. My aunt Cindy's kind of older, kind of sick. And she wears a mask.

And she was telling a story of she. He was with her grandson who she's raising because of pills. You guys know how it is. Good to be back home. And somebody from a church saw him and was like, hey, Braden, how you doing? That's the grandson's name. Shook his hand and said, give me a hug. And Braden knew that he was told not to hug people because his grandparents are old and sick.

So he wouldn't do it. And the dude said, oh, come on, Braden, where's your face? And then my aunt Cindy. Quit being a queer and give me a hug, boy. don't you believe in God? I'm sorry, I'm saying that word. That's what I feel like. That's these people, though.

I've been in Morgan County three days. I've already dropped the F-on. But I'm quoting somebody. Yeah, you're quoting somebody. That's fine. Oh, God. I apologize, everybody. We'll beat that out.

But, uh... Sure. You won't because it was me. Yeah. You only do it if it's you. Yeah, of course. It'll go and beep it. Well, yeah, I'm the one that does it.

I remember to go and leave with it. I mean. Anyway, Anthony didn't curse the man out because I ain't who she is, but like went off on her or whatever. Mom's telling me that story, and I'm dumbfounded. But like, me and Andy just went to Walmart, and I was like, I wonder if anybody's going to be pointing at us or whatever. But then I remembered, like, I'm not huge, but I'm not tiny. I probably had on a tied-eyed shirt.

Andy's got half a shaved head. They're staring at us anyway. Yeah. And they're probably like, don't say anything to those people. They'll put a spell on you. Yeah. Well, yeah, it is quite different here that it is in California. I was talking last night with Laura Peake, our fellow comics.

She's in L.A. now. And she was asked, she's about to move down here too. And she said, hey, I just want to ask you, you're in Georgia, right? And I was like, yes. She goes, how's everybody taking it around there? And I was like, honestly, everyone that I've ever known in love is in a stupidest motherfucker on earth contest it seems like and it's just i don't know it seems to be i mean i think it's getting worse honestly it's kind of gone in waves like it's been roller coastery and they're and they're

back on a woooo part you think it's getting worse like they've just because they're stopping giving any of the fucks they had given or like they're getting madder about it well it's kind of me like they're getting more sick of this shit and that's it's making it worse it's kind of both and it's making me a little bit mad because like some of the people I see talking about it I'm like they're like I'm just I'm just ready for this shit to be over I'm so goddamn tired and I'm like we are too but it's your fault like like if you just if you just not being a goddamn dumb ass this whole time we would be like have you seen other countries how they be doing uh they're fine you know and they're saying it's just fucking and like it's still every day is like it

it don't matter how like dude we like now now At this point, there's been a couple people in the Chattanooga area that people know they died, they died of coronavirus. They were friends. Like this dude that lives down here, he was like the, he was a prominent Republican in the area. And his family came out of business owner. Business owner, business owner, a job creator guy. Yeah. But they lied about him.

Do what? Ain't that the one they lied about? Yeah. You know he was a prominent of wearing, he was a big supporter of wearing masks. No, they, no, they did. but my point is, like, still the people around this dude, like even now that they've seen somebody that they know up close, they still are saying it's a hoax, is what I'm saying?

Like, at first, like... But think about them getting away with that, just so everyone understands, his obituary said, yeah. Y'all know he was a big fan of the masks. He was a, he was a quarterback mask.

Yeah, proponent. Yeah, propit of wearing a mask. And not only that, his family was, you know, talking about how upset they were because here's the whole deal he got he got um infected by going to this big fucking super spreader republican dinner and everyone like some some people that didn't were like you know he he wasn't going to say his name but he was uh he wanted to wear a mask and we're just so upset at everybody else that wouldn't wear a mask because that's why it's happening there's pictures of this motherfucker a at that dinner not wearing a mask be there's several pictures of him

making fun of like doing the the uh matt gay thing where he's basically wearing a gas mask and a fucking hazmat suit. Like, look at these fucking idiots, blah, blah. So, yeah, they're lying afterwards. But, like, my point is, the way that their line is as if they were taking it serious. Right. But my point is, if they can and do, get away with that. Like, Facebook being what it is, there's pictures of this man on Facebook, without a

mask in public at these dinners, making these jokes. And then they'll just put that in the paper. like you're not talking to like a logical human anyway. So my point being like, of course they still say it's a hoax because I, that's just right. I used to think they don't believe in anything. And now what I realize is they truly 100% believe

whatever it is they need to believe that day to get through it. And I mean, who am I? No, I hear you. They truly, it seems that they live by the George Costanza. It's not a lie if you believe it method. And again, who am I? But like, look, when it starts affecting like people's lives and stuff, I feel like me and you are a little bit different.

You know what I'm saying? Like, there's a difference in a normal. Do what? Nothing going. I'm saying there's a, you know, there's a difference between being kind of a dirtbag. Look, I don't, I play fast and loose in my personal life. I don't really give a shit. I'll say whatever's convinced.

describing myself right now. I'll say whatever's convenient to get the thing I want at the moment. There's a huge difference between that and then an elected official doing that with fucking CDC information is all I'm saying. Like these motherfuckers, even at the point of this is dangerous and people are dying and I see people dying are just, they're just a doubling down group, man. I know we're beating a dead horse there, but it's just unfucking believable to see. And it's disheartening. Yeah, for sure. I am, and you are morally way better than that. I was saying... And I suck, is what I'm saying.

I was saying that they're delusional. Yeah. And I'm just delusional about different stuff is what I'm saying. But honestly, I mean, I was just kind of saying that offhand. We're way better than those people. I mean, let's just fuck that. I'm smarter. Better looking.

Right. Well, I think we were talking to several podcasts ago, is like the main difference between us liberals and them conservatives is that we desperately want. and you do this in your bit, this is what your global warming bit is about. We desperately wish that all the stuff we believed in wasn't true. You know what I mean?

Whereas that's not them. Like when we say something, we're like, I wish this wasn't it, but this is it. You know what I'm saying? Right. Well,

I meant me and you specifically. Yeah, yeah, not necessarily liberals. I've been on Twitter. It's a nightmare. The country's dissolving. I think I'm going to have to live in this trailer.

You guys want to see my trailer? Yeah, fuck yeah. Set it up. Can you see it past the 19 cars my dad owns? No. He's a living Jeff Foxworthy, Joe? Oh, that's, I was just saying, are you in a fucking trailer subdivision?

Because that's a bunch of cars. No, that's just how many vehicles my parents own. Yeah. There's a trailer back over there, and my brother, his kids grew up in it. It's my brother's old trailer. And what I mean by that is it's an old trailer, but it also used to be his trailer. So the problem isn't just that it's a trailer from the 70s. It also ain't been lived in it almost a year.

Right, right, right, right. So, yeah, man, we're really, this is the second time I moved Andy's ass into a trailer. Last time it was an RV. I'm daring her to leave me, and she just ain't going to. Where's she going to go, a different trailer? True that. Well, you know, her parents own more land than God. I didn't know that until recently.

Did I ever tell you all that? No. They're not rich. They're not rich. They're not rich, rich. They're land rich. I mean, that's a good way to be. It's rich.

I never heard that's the best kind of landed gentry that's what I'm saying yeah I'm the duke of scott county I'm married into it yeah we sit down to do the will you know and they were like we want you to be there and it was super awkward because I was like yeah I were old not yesterday but you know at a point I was but saying how fucking long you've been home I know why your ass drove so fast that's hilarious yeah man I'm just I'm just dying on a hundred acres right on the edge of the you know fuck targville I'm not supposed to say that word either. Good Lord, I've done four more.

My man's in a trailer park, drinking a Miller lot, just dropping by everybody. Well, now, I will say this. I'm going to edit one of them out, Drew. You get to pick. You got to text me. You know what? You know which one I want you to edit out. But, fuck it.

Let's talk about it. Let's talk about allowing people to fucking grow. Let's talk about that. The first F word I said on this podcast today, dude, that Louis-Cicke bit, you know, Louis did it as a bit, like, I didn't know, I didn't mean gay people, but like he knew, but he was being funny. But when you're 16 or 18 or whatever, like in college, playing college football, I'm not saying it was every other word out of my mouth, but literally, and I used to do a bit about this, literally my teammates called me liberal faggot.

They literally did. Yeah, and you are now. And I'm, well, I'm not saying that that makes anything okay. I'm just saying that I genuinely didn't know any better. With the one I just said, fucked hard, I apologize everybody. I'm an idiot like I am. But until someone pointed out to me this year...

Please don't say what they called the running back. I was like... But until somebody pointed out to me this year, you know, what that word really is about, it genuinely didn't know. And you know what? it wasn't fucked tard. It was Lib tard. Yeah.

I talked about people saying Libtard, and somebody was like, that's offensive. I was like, what? In my mind, it's like, well, that, no, they're talking about me. I am with them. That's what I was about to say. Like, Libtard specifically, when do we ever use Libtard other than in the context of that's somebody calling us that or our people that, or we're making fun the way they talk, like, oh, yeah, the Libtards, or have you believe.

And so like Corey said, it's like a gay person, can say queer or any of those words. And black people say the N-word or whatever. If that's the slur they use for me, literally me, like I can't say lib-tard, like when I'm talking about in that context. Like, because that's what they're not going to stop saying it. Yeah, they're not calling the kids at the Special Olympics Lib-Tard. Yeah, but they call them Tards.

Tard is on its own. See, he chuckled because it's a much funnier version of the slur. Tard is a slur Good God And someone pointed that out to me I was like What other ones are there, Drew? Man

Look Look, I live in a trailer now This is apparently is who you've become Well, my whole point is You and Trey Can't have this conversation And maybe we shouldn't On the podcast, I don't know

But if we can't Then we're fucking lost anyway Is all I'm saying We have to be able to talk about it And I genuinely, and maybe I'm an idiot, I genuinely hadn't thought about Liptar being offensive. I hadn't. Someone pointed out and I was like, oh, man, that is definitely derived from that word.

Just like when I was 16, or let's be honest, 24, I just didn't think about the F word being, like I called it to my friends who were very straight and in marriages or whatever for being idiots or whatever. And then like, of course someone pointed it out to me. And of course I was like, oh, man, that's shitty. Well, how much of the word do you need? How much, okay, I'd like to ask. How much of the word?

No, I think it's an important question because, like, I've never once heard anyone say the word, okay, the word wigger, right? Wigger. I was just about to bring. Okay. There's more, there's more. Dude, there's just as much of the N word in that as there is the R word. Almost all of it.

Almost all of it. in that than there is Lib tar. I will say, because I swear to God, Gloria, I was about to bring this, I was about to bring this exact same thing up because I was thinking of it exactly like you are right now. But like, there are plenty of people who would absolutely prefer you not say Wigger. Of course, and by the way, I haven't even thought of that in a long time. I'm just saying, I've never much a dead word.

Right, but I've never once been like, like every time, like, I feel like if I was on Twitter and, no, I don't know. We hadn't. Lord, I just thought of the funniest worst joke. over and I can't wait to tell y'all not on the podcast. Y'all go ahead. Jesus, I can't imagine what it is if you ain't going to say it right now. But yeah, man, I guess, I guess the, I guess the Wobie word, see, it's Wigger.

I guess Wigger just don't, it just ain't a thing no more, like at all. First of all, I'm glad because if I'm honest, even back then, and this isn't trying, obviously I'm not trying to get fucking points at this point on this goddamn episode. But like, even back, like, when I heard it, there was a part of me that was like, wait a minute. I don't think mostly y'all would say that around black people. That feels very much like what you're saying is he's a white version of a thing I don't like. No, exactly.

It's right. Yeah, no, it's double. It always felt, it never felt like. Well, it's kind of accidentally racist. Well, as a slur, it's kind of, it's kind of perfect because like you can, you're offending equally both people. Like, like it's going to offend the black people because you're saying this is a bad thing. to be this. And then you're offended the person you're calling to because they're like, God, the last thing I'd want to be associated with is this. So like,

whoever thought of it, I'm just saying they were a pretty good racist. All right, but let me say this. I don't believe in N-word passes in spite of what Neil Brennan says because if there's one year, true, that had, that would have gotten an inward pass if that was real. It would be M&M and M. Right. And M&M never put the N-word in his rap as far as I know. He's never said it, that anybody, nose of or has on tape, but he did say Wigger a couple of times. Right. It is.

Talking about what they call him. Yes. I do think it's different. It's definitely different. But I don't think, but I don't, but I still think that that word is, it mean, obviously, I don't even know why I'm saying this. Y'all, everybody agrees with me. That word's wrong.

It's fucked up. Yeah. It's fucked up. Like you said, it's very clear the etymology of that word. Right. And the origin of it. Yeah. If you break it down.

Could you use it in a sentence, please? Professor Trey. No, it don't hit. What? Tray would be a, I would love to have Trey. If I, back if I, you know, if I was 18, I would love to have Trey on a, you know, Slurs 102. That'd be a hilarious spelling bee sketch. Yeah.

Oh, well. Well, Trey, me and Drew laid it all out for you. I actually had a thing I had written down on my list that's actually related to this. this is like way less problematic than most of our conversations today, but still a little bit. And it's a dated topic now, but I'd put it on my list and just never really come up, but it has not kind of sure to come up.

I can't get over how much geography apparently just makes me an asshole. That's that works, buddy. Yep. In the NBA playoffs in the first round a couple of weeks ago now, one of the players, a black player for the Los Angeles Clippers, on camera referred to a white player for the Dallas Mavericks as a quote, bitch-ass white boy.

And Luca, Donchick, the player that he was referring to as a bitch-ass white boy, is like, objectively speaking, one of the baddest motherfuckers in the game and was wrecking their shit that day. And Harold, Montrez Harrell is the Clippers player. He didn't trash talking on the court or whatever. him a bitch-ass white boy. It got caught on camera and it became a thing. And like it was talked about inside the NBA, blew up Twitter and all this shit. A lot of people were talking about how it, Charles Barkley said on inside the NBA, he was like, and he was like, look, you can't do that.

You can't have a double standard like that. Like, you know damn well if he had said, if he called you a bitch-ass black boy or anybody did, that would be a massive fucking problem. So you can't expect to just say shit like that. And then he ended up apologizing and they hugged it out the next game squash it. It's completely over with by now. And I was thought it was never that big of a deal to begin with, but I just wondered, like, you know. Oh, I got thoughts. Okay. Well, let's get into it.

I feel like on this podcast, since I'm the only one who a black guy is only, I'm the one of black guys ever tried to stab during a basketball. Oh, right. You, no one has ever in the history of basketball been called. a white boy in any form, bitch ass or otherwise, unless you was wrecking shit. Right, right. It's a compliment. That's what you're saying.

Unless you're fucking shit up, you ain't ever. Okay, and now let me bring it to the problematic part of my point. Here we go. If the N-word had only ever been used to talk about black dudes fucking white chicks, and it ain't, and I'm not saying it's the same. But my point is, it wouldn't be as problematic of a word. Right. It would only be used in those circumstances where you was clearly running game on something.

Right. First of all, there's a hundred reasons it's not, A, the same. It's not a double standard or B, problematic because of history. White people have never been slaves in this country. Luca Donkett, his people, I don't know who they are. They might have been slaves to somebody, but not anybody in Africa. Being white, I never had anything to do with anybody being a slave at all that I know of, maybe going way back.

So it's not the same in that regard. but also I cannot stress enough that if they call you a white boy on the basketball court, anybody, including another white guy, it's because you're wrecking shit. Well, it's like, I don't know, white boy get, I've been called a white boy multiple times by like fans of ours or whatever. Like I got an email just the other day from a black woman professor just talking about how I hit basically. but anyway, she did take the exact words that she used were, you are a white boy that I fucks with. Yeah, there you go. But anyway, they used to say.

That's the only reason. Trey brought you. Yeah, so I could say that. But they said, they used to say, other rappers used to say about, to bring it back to Eminem back in the day, quote, everybody know you don't fuck with the white boy. Because, you know, because he'll wreck your shit. And Chappelle has.

that great bit about the white boy in the group. I've never once been bothered by being called a white boy. Right. Yeah, you know the white boy in the group. The one to not fuck with because he had to do some while. But like, but it's not.

But I think, but you do have to admit, though, that in the context of the NBA, when that happened, like the NBA, basketball in general was like way, way more overtly racially

charged than it's ever been before. And in the context of that, in that moment, I do think, Of course it became a thing. And of course, it, like, sort of blew up or whatever just because of that, you know. But, I mean, I agree with you that. And I don't think Luca gave a fuck about it.

You know, I don't think he knew he was in his head. That's why he said that. Luca was just, oh, they say bad word to me. I don't like. I play basketball. His only game, why you have to be mad. That's a very interesting component to this because Luca is only academically. And how long has you been in the league now?

Two or three years? Three years, I think. He's only academically and or with three years of very limited experience aware of any of that. Right. You know what I mean? And I don't know how it felt to him. I hope in some part of his heart he knows it is sincerely the most ultimate compliment. Absolutely.

Like if somebody's like, at the start of the game, and at the start of the game, if somebody's like, you guard the white boy. Right. They mean, you suck and he probably sucks. But if at the end of the game, and that was the third of the fourth quarter, at the end of the game, if they're calling you anything white boy, any version of it. Yeah, you're hitting. Larry Bird, like, famously used to get offended and pissed off if the other team put a white guy on him.

Right. Well, I think Tom's get mad if they tried to put a white guy on him. Well, I think Tom Seguer... White people don't head a basketball basis. Tom Seguera summed it up pretty good in his last special, which was like, if you hear a white person saying, like, let's just use the word honky. I think he used the word honky.

He's like, if you hear a white person saying that the word honky or Cracker offends them, you need to get the fuck out because that's an insane person. Like, that's the most racist person. Then he did the whole act that where he's like, oh, they called me a honky. And he goes, and what happened next? Did you pass out from laughing too hard? And it's just

Like like like like like like I feel like and this is just me personally It's a white man's opinion, but it's just one white man's opinion Which you know whatever on how much weight that holds but like a lot Yeah you're right you're right it does But I think's your house right yeah it's pretty bad but like but like if yeah like any white guy that tells you that like, oh, he called me a white boy. He called me in Honger. He called me.

And you literally have to, on purpose, get offended at that. You know what I'm saying? Like, you have to, like, you have to want really hard to make a point to get a fit. Because, like, it just blows right off the fucking water off a duck's back, son. I don't give a fuck. Like, you know what I'm? Especially, like, I feel like, in my opinion, because I try to be a good person at least, the only way a black dude would call me fucking bitch-ass white boy is if I was doing

something in hit roll. So like, I'd be like, you goddamn right. You black motherfucker. Look at that shit. Yeah. Or you was doing something so shitty. You deserve to be called me. Exactly.

Exactly. Like, either way, it's fucking fine. You were either oppressing the masses or you dunked on. Yeah, exactly. You're exactly right. It ain't like anybody was ever walking into a fucking cafe with his wife. And they were pulling their kid in a. stroller and somebody was like bitch-ass-wife, but that ain't ever happened.

Yeah, and I'm also not, you know, one other thing that I will not, one other thing that I will not do is discount Charles Barkley's opinion on the matter. He's obviously allowed to think whatever he thinks, I just disagree. I don't, that, that's, it's a double standard, the standard, they have to be equal. You know what I'm saying? Like, they have to hold equal weight in order for that to be real. Like, if I, if, like, if a, like if a man, runs is running up to a woman and screaming you fucking bitch you goddamn dumb cun ass bitch and then so that's happening on one end and then the other end there's a woman you know let's say she's got half her head shaved or something and she's running up screaming

you fucking toxic trash ass motherfucker one of them's more serious because that dude could fucking throw down do some work you know what i mean like the double standard don't make sense because one of them has been systemic and is actually ruined a gender i i i agree with you. Mantras Harrell probably could whip Luca Duncan's ass. What do you, to that end, sort of, what do you think about the argument that like, it's literally impossible to be racist towards white people because of exactly what you just said, i.e. white people have always been in the oppressors. You can't oppress them. So the oppressed groups cannot possibly be racist toward white people for that reason.

I think it's you can be, I see this shit come up on me. You can be bigoted, you can be bigoted, right? Like, you can, by the word, prejudice. They always say that and in my head, I'm like, okay, I, okay, but you know what, you know that most of the time when people say that, what they mean is prejudice. They're not getting into a semantic debate over what the word racism actually. They mean prejudice towards white people. You can absolutely be prejudiced towards white people.

and that don't hit either. No, it don't hit. But it's important. It's disingenuous, in my opinion. It don't hit, but it is important. I disagree with that. I think it's disingenuous a little bit, though, to play the other side of that argument,

because you're right that you can be prejudiced towards white people, and obviously we kind of all know what that means, but prejudice towards black people traded by a white person, especially in any situation where it's a workplace or any kind of social, become

racism Right Because it is What holds weight You gotta play it fair Like it's like holds weight Yeah I mean

Dude women can be sexist to men But who gives a shit Like I know you can be prejudiced Towards white people Has Drew been freezing up on your end? Yeah he is Yeah He can be prejudiced towards white people

There he is Drew You've been No God You've been fucking up real bad the past few minutes. Your internet, I mean, your connection. Also, the words you've been saying for the entire episode, but...

He unfrozen, I just heard no God. Yeah, me too. That's all I heard as well. Yeah. No, yeah, I mean, I don't disagree with any of that. I just think that particular argument framed that way, like I said, it's like... I still...

I think disingenuous is a fine word for it, because I think that... I disagree. That's not what they... When people are making the argument, you literally can't be racist towards white people because of white people

being the impressors and that's not possible. Again, to me, that's like a semantic debate and it's like, that's not the point of what anybody is saying. Like, you're talking, you're making it a completely different thing

and argument when you try to say that because that's not what people mean. But if people, I do think it is, what people mean. Maybe they don't know that they mean it, but like, I do think that people think prejudice towards white people and prejudice towards black people is the same. Okay. That a lot of white people think that's the same. And it's not the same inside a system in which what supremacy has such a stronghold. Okay. And so you make that point. Hold on. It does,

but class people can be prejudiced towards poor white people and it absolutely has effects on them and whatever you might not call it racism and that can be systemic too and as soon as you join us in my socialist you know utopia we would welcome you with open arms but what I'm saying is I do think it's important it's not just semantics to draw those differences out because I would say 90% of the time that the conversations you're referencing to, they do need to point out the person saying whatever they're saying about racism towards white people do need to understand what racism and systemic racism means. They need to be told the exact thing that you're talking about.

They need to learn it and internalize it. So it's not that prejudice doesn't exist towards white people. that they believe that any prejudice they've ever felt as a white person is somehow proof or evidence that what we talk about when we talk about systemic racism is overblown. And it's not. No, yeah. No. Almost anybody who's saying people are racist towards white people too, they do mean prejudice.

But it's not semantics to point that out to them. I think it's important to point that out to them. Well, and also, like, realistically the thing is, like, on our end, this is my opinion, it's more of a classism thing because like almost any white person that is getting prejudiced against, especially by the system, if they just get a better, and this obviously, I'm not saying this can happen. Like, hey, go out there and pick yourself up by your bootstops. But in the event, they came into a little money and just jumped up one tax bracket. Then all the sudden, literally every single bit of that shit goes away.

You know what I'm saying? But like a black person has to get to like OJ or Kanye status before all of a sudden they're not looked at just as a black person by so many people in society would be the difference in my opinion. It's like Chris Rock said, black people got to fly. Yes. To some shit the white man can walk. Right, right. Like, so like you can dress up a poor white person to just look like they ain't a poor

white person and then they can have a good day. You know what I'm saying? Like you can't do that to a black person. Yeah, I mean, until they started talking like their people, I'm not at all trying to disregard things that happen to poor white people. folk at all. I'm simply saying that inside the conversations about anytime someone says white people experience racism, I don't think it's disingenuous to point out to them that they mean prejudice because if they said that, I think nine times out of ten,

they don't understand the nuance of that conversation. You know what? Maybe it should be, maybe what we really should be talking about is that some of these white people instead of, it's just a way of looking at it instead of saying whenever whenever racism gets brought up and whenever the term white privilege gets thrown around or something or whenever you're talking about being oppressed instead of saying well what about me me too fuck them they're racist against us too if instead of doing that look at it as oh shit we're on the same team you know what I mean we're we should both be mad as fuck and I should be happy like me and you should be on

you've got the joke about it tray like you're We should be, we're the same. Yeah. Well, smart, Mark. I feel like when you bring up this thing, people, it automatically in your head, you picture some white asshole or white Karen or whatever being like, well, black people can be racist too or whatever. Right. Which, like, what reminded me of it, to even bring it up earlier, was actually the Luca Donchik discussion we were having,

because, like, you get on Reddit after that happens. And some people will be like, look, you can't, like, here's the thing. It's fine. It's not a big deal. but it's crazy to act like it wasn't a racial remark because he literally says like, of course it was a racial remark. And then invariably, someone else would be like, well, actually it wasn't because that's literally impossible.

You can't be racist towards a white person because of the, and they bring all that up. And I think that, that is the context of it when I brought it up. And every time I read that, I'm like, dude, come on, you know. You know what he meant. You're full of shit right now. You know what he, like, that's not, you're making it about another thing. All the white people who just love any opportunity to yell, well, black people are racist too.

You can, you know, some people are racist against white people. Yeah, nine times out of ten, they don't hit. And yeah, I don't want to sound like I'm on their side about it. But also like another thing, just sticking with race, I had a interesting experience. Something, I don't know, it almost feels dumb to say that it never occurred to me. It makes me feel dumb, but it's the truth. It really never occurred to me until this moment. I went to a Black Lives Matter protest in L.A.

I went to a few of them. One of the ones I went to, I was, they opened it up with this thing of, they had a bunch of speakers lined up, a lot of them were comics and stuff. And one of the speakers that was going to be coming up later was a middle-aged black lady comic who's very hilarious. But I didn't even know she was,

I didn't even know she was there yet. She's sitting off to the same. I, and the organization event is getting it started. And they got it started. This is a Black Lives Matter of protest in West Hollywood. So like there's a lot of white people there. Like, you know, California white people. A lot of black people too.

But a lot of white people. And they started with this event that was like, everybody was sitting down, which had nothing to do with it. But they were like, she went through this thing that was like, and it's been a long time now. So I don't remember exactly. But it was something like, raise your hand. if thing.

And I raise your hand and look around you. And it was questions like, it was clearly the whole point of it was to illustrate white privilege because the idea was every, raise your hand if you grew up in a single parent household. Raise your hand if your parents had to work multiple jobs. Raise your hand if you spend a significant amount of your life without any form of health insurance.

Raise your hand it, that sort of thing. And the idea was it would always, the black hands would be in the air and the white hands. I see where this going. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Before I even get into it, because you do see where it's going, I'm not, I'm not saying. I know. I didn't mean that. Specifically about me. What happened? But like, no, it's a good. I'm in it in a good way. Like, you know, I. And I, I wouldn't, I don't know how many other people were in the same, how many other white people were in the same position I was. But, you know, like, answering the questions honestly. Yeah. I wasn't. I wasn't. raising my, or I can't remember if it was hand up means white privilege or hand down means white privilege. Usually hand up is pretty wide. Right. Yeah. But anyway, I wasn't raised in my hand

for any of those things. You know, it's like, that's what it was. It was the reverse. It's like, raise your hand. If you grew up in a household with two parents, raise your hand. If you, you know, nobody in your family worked multiple jobs, raise your hand. If you've always had health insurance your entire life, raise your hand if, you know, you had a safety net or whatever. Like, shit like that. So white people raise your hand basically. And like answering the questions honestly, I wasn't raising my hand for any of that shit because it wasn't true for me. Right. Right. Like that's the reality. I wasn't trying to game the system or nothing. Those are my honest answers to the questions. And after a few of them, and again, I'm not saying this about me, I'm sure there were probably a few white people who were doing what I was doing.

The black lady comic that was about to come up on the stage a little bit later who was sitting off to the side starts hollering from the side of the stage y'all motherfuckers are lying oh shit and the and the girl the running the thing was like was like well calm down and she was like listen she just she gets like that or whatever she's like you don't know that they're lying that doesn't mean that they're lying or whatever and here's anyway here's the revelation then you want to just be like yo same team god damn but the the revelation i had was like because she ended up in talking later when she got up there was talking. Turns out she's born and raised in LA. She's from like, you know, Compton or somewhere. She's a southern, she's been in Southern California, her whole life. And I started thinking,

I was thinking about the whole thing. And I was like, what, does she like, because again, she's in her 50s probably. And I was like, does she like genuinely believe that if you white, probably got money? You know what I mean? Like, or you have more money. And now, then I started think I started looking around. I was like, well, in Los Angeles, like, you mostly do, like as far as I can tell, like, where, like, where do the poor white people in Los Angeles live who are like from here? And I'm not counting starving artists. Yeah, but say you can't. Yeah, right. I don't mean that. I mean people that grow up and what neighbors they grow up and what schools do they go to. It seems like mostly in certain areas,

probably most cities, I guess, but I don't know, or a lot of cities, and maybe LA is one of them, like if you're white you you do have a lot of that shit you do have at least a little bit of money and opportunity and things like that and I don't know that was just weird for me to think about because obviously I grew up poor white trash I've never right I mean I used to have that joke about like not even really identifying with white people because whenever I heard white people I also thought like Connecticut Yacht Club ascot white people and I was like well I know I ain't that Right. But still the idea of like, because it was my reality growing up, the idea of if you're white, you have money and opportunity and privilege and influence and stuff automatically has never like, that's never been a thing. And it's wild for me to think about that I guess some people like really do look at it that way.

And that's white privilege in a nutshell right there is that like people's prejudices against us is, oh, he's white. must have fucking health care of parents. God, yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, where it's like, you know, when we were kids growing up, we saw a black person and we're like, they must be good at basketball. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's theirs to us.

So like, yeah, you can be prejudiced towards us, but it's usually in a, I bet they got it good situation. So therefore it doesn't hold as much weight. My opinion. That makes sense to me. Are you all there? Yeah. A little bit.

Yeah. I said that makes sense to me. I said that that made sense to me what Corey said. Well, yeah, I was just piggybacking, but no, I mean, I don't think that makes you, especially you try, like, if you were in Cal, if you lived in California your whole life, it probably would be dumb that you, that that hadn't occurred to you. You know what I'm saying? But like, being from Salina and, you know, growing up a dirt bag piece of shit like you did,

no offense. Yeah. You know. Yeah. Yeah. Then like, no. I mean, that's, that's, that's something, you know what I mean? And that's like, that's like a weird thing that you just are,

you just going to have to deal with that your whole life is like, sorry, man, you are white now. You know what I mean? Yeah, right. Congratulations. Yeah, you're white now. Good job, buddy. At the worst possible time.

Yep. I was, I don't know if I was talking to somebody else on a pod or, but I, oh, I know what it was. I did this podcast my friends have from back in New York called Are You Garbage? and I was talking What was the result? Turns out I'm super garbage. They couldn't,

I scored off the charts for their podcast. But I was talking to them about when you, one difference when you talk to your black friends, like this is comedians, I should say, because we talk differently. But we talk differently to each other. But as an analogy, there's like a moment in your life,

especially if you like go to college and try to do things the right way. And if you're white trash, and I think you identify this, tray, we're like, I can kind of remember, again, analogously, where it was like, oh, shit, I got an invitation of this party. Let's go to this party. And some of my black friends were like, no, I'm not going to go to that party. Like, I can remember things on campus, like some of my friends on the football team. It's like, let's go to that. And I didn't even know why.

Some of my black friends are like, no. And a few times, it's like, oh, y'all were right. Like, I got out in there, and now you could see right through me. The teeth ain't straight yet. You know what I mean? And pardon me for sounding too, you know, much like me or whatever, but I think that what you just described is a product of the blatant attempt to divide us. There is this weird.

For sure. And frankly, I think this one comes from liberals more than it does conservative, only because, only because conservatives love to, conservatives stoke it by telling poor white people that they should be afraid of black people and immigrants. They're going to take your jobs, take your women, and commit crimes. But the way liberals do it to a certain extent, like I'm talking like neoliberal, rich people big time,

is they want to have it both ways or whatever, where we, coming from where we came from, we're all toothless, dumb, poor, racist idiots that therefore all liberals, including black people, especially black people, should fear. You know, we're the enemy by virtue of where we were born. And so I would imagine that, and I don't want to imagine too far, but I would imagine that that woman thinks that every white person in that park is from Hollywood. Right.

Or is Hollywood E at least? Yes. And even if they moved there, they were able to move there because their parents and then that. And we can't, you and I and Corey, can't complain too much about this, I don't think, because it's the big part of our career, especially yours, Trey, is like, she would be surprised to learn you even exist. Right. In other words, it's not that she doesn't know that there are poor white people in the world who experience all those things.

She just can't maybe perhaps can't fathom them being at that black life. Right. In West Hollywood. Right. Because how'd you get here? All Trump supporters. Yeah. Right.

How did you get here or why did you get here? Right. Yeah, no. I mean, I think you're probably right. It's like I said, after that happened, I sort of like, I sort of looked at race. It's like I was like I said a big ago. And my head was like, wait, did she like, like, did she like. is she think that automatically if you're white, you know, you got money and stuff.

And then, and then I like looked around and I was like, oh, all these motherfuckers got money. Right. Yeah, for sure. All these white people do. I was like, oh, right. Yeah. I would definitely assume that about the rest of these people. And I mean, but frankly, I mean, you know, you were your fucking horn rim glasses and you're, you know, like you looked apart now.

You do a really good job of blending in and not seeming like the, as I said, garbage piece of shit that you truly are. That day, I had a and it's a ball's hat specifically, but and jeans and shit. Well, you're like, you know. No, I do.

You show them you're bald. No, it's, this is so funny. Like my ADD and my bald met because I took my hat off and I was like, God damn, your fucking heads glowing like a son. Look at,

I mean, I look like I'm playing an angel and the fucking Christmas can tauta over here. I thought you were saying like, I thought you did that because I was like, I was like, well, that day I had a camo hat on and I, it didn't really make sense to me, but you took your hat off at that exact moment. Look how terrible I would have done at that rally. Yeah, yeah, exactly. That's what I thought you were doing. No, I had, no, look at this.

No, I don't just play. No, that's hilarious. I had an itch and just like always, I literally cannot take my hat off without it becoming a whole thing. No, just a bald moment. just me not hitting finally started to embrace it and then as soon as I take my hat off he's like what are you doing what are you trying to prove what point are you making by taking your hat off that's weird if you're doing it it it must be some sort of performance I was yet you nobody would just do what you just did it I mean he ain't wrong I know I but I had

an itch yeah no we're both we're both not wrong me and what I said and you and pointing out that my head don't hit Well, Drew, where are you at now on the porch? Yeah, I move to the porch. Well, boys. Have you told, because I feel like we probably started about five minutes after we said we would, so I know we're getting close.

And also, you may have told it on here before, but have you told the Salina Kansas story before? Oh, yeah. On here? Yeah, me and DJ have talked about it. I think the first time we had DJ on. Yeah, we did. The first time we had DJ on.

And then white people don't hit. Exactly. When y'all told me that story, that was another kind of like revelatory moment for me. Because not white people necessarily, but the different kinds of like rednecks or old boys or whatever. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like most of the, I feel like the variety that I grew up with are a different breed of, they still shitty rednecks or whatever, but they're not the same as the ones y'all encountered.

in Salina, Kansas. Yeah, because, as you've said a bunch, like growing up in Salina, you're like, you know, we had a black community. If you said that, you got your fucking ass whipped. Where they're at in Kansas ain't nary a black person around. They have just had fucking free reign to say and think whatever they've wanted, completely unchecked for their entire goddamn life. And then, because my, well, my whole thing with it, for a lot of people that don't know,

Salina, Kansas is about 40 miles-ish. maybe not even that long away from the West Borough Baptist Church. And so I thought, because all I'd ever known about the Westboro Baptist Church was usually they would do a thing. And most people, even like people who were Christians, it did not hit for them. So I was like, this is a universally hated group of people. So I thought, well, God damn, if I'm 40 miles from there,

these people, as much as we hate them, they must really fucking hate them. and so I was like, I'm going to do jokes about Westboro Baptist Church. And I about got ran out the goddamn room because it turns out I was really, I don't know if it's one of those like they do hit for them. So fuck you. Or if it's like that's their Scientology. So it's like, hey, we just, we just don't talk about that. You know what I mean?

Do you want one of them to come in here and fucking end this? Because they will. Like they got power around here. But the way you and DJ always talked about it, it always seemed like Dave hated whatever. They hated us. bad. But that, but like, I never paid so much money for them to hate me. It was a call that, or a call. It was a show. It was a gig that happened every year. It's not like it was a new thing. Now it wasn't to have comedians before the band. And I know the guy who normally went and did it and he's very much like a redneck style comedian. And I love him. He's great. But like, you and DJ weren't, he never had those problems, right? When he would go there and do the show. And you and DJ, like, you were not at that time. You weren't nearly as big of queer as you are now. Like, you're material. at that time was not like...

No, I mean, I was definitely still... Well, first off, it really, really doesn't matter even if I was, because I swear to you, I didn't even get word one out of my mouth before they started saying, boo, fuck you, bring on the ban. So, like, yeah, like, yes, my... Did you go first or second? I can't...

I can't remember, honestly. That'd be key information if DJ had already been up there for 25 minutes coming. Y'all are the fucking devil. Wait a minute. Well, you know, what, okay. I can't remember, but I do remember. So, you know, we almost got breach of contracted.

Like, they almost didn't. Well, yeah, you, hang on, Corey. Yeah, you froze up. You froze up. So who went first? What did you say? I think it was DJ because it was 100. Matter of fact, I know for a fact, it was DJ.

I'm the one that got the gig, so he was opening for me. We almost got in breach of contract because we weren't supposed to drink before the show. And we, but we didn't. Like, we legitimately didn't. Like, I have no reason. lie about that all these years later. But DJ is a type of person who Stone Cold Sober seems like he's fucked up. Yeah. And he was on a table. He was on a table grabbing his dick and telling everybody to suck it. But like, I want to say that that was reactionary. You know what I'm saying?

I don't like, I don't think that was a bit. I think that was brought on. You know what I mean? Like I think something had happened that wanted DJ being like, suck my fucking dick, you idiot, you know. And then, yeah. Was it that he got up there and was just bombing his ass off and they hated and we're booing him and stuff? Because I, by the end, he's grabbing his dick and telling him to suck it.

And then you had to go up there. Yeah, now that I'm remembering it, now that I'm remembering it. But like, I feel like it was one of those things with them. I had always thought you went first for somewhere. No, that makes more sense because I, like, Drew and because if DJ went up there, because that was the part that was always weird for me because like I said, these people presumably come to this event every year.

There's always a comedian first. And normally it's like hits for them. I did. DJ definitely went first. And the reason that I know that, I had, we'll have to talk to him like he's going to have a better fucking recollection of this. But all I remember is I didn't do my,

I didn't finish my set, but not on me. Like, because, so I'm up there and they're booing me about. And the lady looks over, the way it was running the room looks over and she gives me the, the, you know, cut it sign.

And I thought she meant, like, what I was talking about. And I was like, okay, so I moved on to something. She's like, mm. And then finally the dude just comes to, I was like 12 minutes in. Finally the dude comes and brings me off. And she's like, yeah, I was like, wait, do I do something wrong? Why are y'all cutting my time? She's like, they just, it wasn't it for them.

You know what I mean? Like, so you do. But they'd already give me the cash straight up. But like, no, they's just booing me. Fuck you bring on the ban. I think DJ would have had to have gone first in that situation because if they were cutting me. then they wouldn't have put up another motherfucker.

You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So I don't know, but it, I got me a $500 p coat that night, though. I borderline know that's what happened because I called the lady. Because DJ asked me to. Yeah, because we're about to get fucking sued. That's what she said. She didn't have no interest in that.

She just wanted to whatever. Well, it was funny to me is that, like, they wanted to talk about, oh, they've been drinking. before the show breach of contract they didn't i mean hell we legitimate DJ legitimately did destroy the fucking hotel room how I woke up covered in my own blood because i passed out butt-necked uh and DJ unbeknownst to me had shattered a lamp in my bed the night before so but like no word one about that it was just they were drinking before the show yeah I slept in a bed full of glass but now I sober as a judge true before the show I was legitimately before the show I mean

that was the entire breach of contract argument was that y'all got drunk before the show. Yeah. How can you prove that without having pictures of them drinking back? I asked her. I said, ma'am, did you serve them beer? I said, because if you did, it sounds like you wanted them to be a contract. She said, oh, no, I didn't serve them beer.

I said, oh, who served them beer? And she said, well, I don't know. And I said, well, how do you know they have beer? And her whole thing was that DJ was up on a table, grabbing his dick, told her everybody to suck it. and we were just like, that has nothing to do with beer. She said something like the first one seemed drunk. And I said, you mean the one with lamb chops?

Right. Who smells like a brewery? Yeah. Wearing a shirt that says, I tip fuck the devil and all I got was his t-shirt. Yeah. I probably said tobacco plant. It smells like a tobacco plant. He's just wild, ma'am.

Yeah. Seems like he needs a bath. His father was a billy goat. I think I said, ma'am, he don't drink. He ain't allowed to on account of probation. You have a good day. His fucking, yeah, his lawnmower won't even start if he's had a beer. No, he's got a blow into it.

But yeah, no, it was, it was a. But here's the thing, man, like, for real, I'm like, again, I have no reason not to lie. It would be funnier if I just right now was like, fuck y'all, I was drunk. But I got paid, like, that's the most money I'd ever made in my life up on that point. Like, I got paid like $1,500. And they, and, like, I wasn't about to lose that over having a, like, I drove 18 hours, made $1,500. I wasn't about to lose that by having one beer when afterwards, by the way,

and it was like afterwards, by, y'all can just do whatever you want. Open bar, have fun. And we did. Like as soon as, yeah, as soon as I got kicked off stage by the manager of a day's in, I got a little drunk, you know, that'll do it. That'll do it to you. Well, I do think, I do think she brought up to me a broken telephone. He did that.

He did that. There was a picture of DJ breaking. a telephone. Y'all don't remember that? We turned it into a meme. He was like calling space and stuff. I told her to take a picture of the broken phone and send it to me. But she just didn't want to fool with it.

No, and they were just trying to get their goddamn money back is what was happening. They were just like, this show didn't hit. We can scare these red notes. I got to go. All right. Well, we all do. Very quickly, I just want to, you can go, Drew, if you need to love you by. just want to know what was the way were people you got done and you had an open bar and y'all took

advantage of it but you had already just started this shit show right on stage how were they how was everybody acting didn't help afterwards like no hated it you were there like hanging out drinking stuff because it's a free but in spite but they they weren't trying to act like it didn't happen they weren't being cool no clearly y'all did not hit for them they wanted y'all Nobody, yeah, nobody like actually was like, I think one person, one old boy was kind of like, y'all, you need to get the fuck out of here, blah, blah, blah. But the best thing that people did was just, just look at us like, hey, goddette. Like, we'd be over there having a beer like, hey, how you doing? And they would just fucking dart off and leave.

I went to this table of people who I thought, like, I thought they looked my way and were kind of like, you were good. And I went over there and I said, hey, what's going on guys? And this guy was like, the fuck out of here. I think, I don't know, but I think that's the table. I stole that fucking Kenneth Cole, like $500 p coat from, which I didn't mean to, by the way. I woke up the next morning, butt neck in the bed covering glass, and then we were leaving, and DJ was like, DJ was like, oh, goddamn, what was I saying?

DJ said, hey, man, we got to go. And I was like, all right. And he goes, he goes, well, do you got to get your jacket? And I was like, that ain't my jacket. He's like, well, motherfucker, you's wearing it all night last night. I got it and it was like a nice fucking Kenneth Cole Picoe. So still got it, still wear it. All in all good trip.

There wasn't like a like a backstage situation. Like y'all were always in full view of the crowd that had run you offstage and hated you and shit the whole time. Like, yeah. Oh, yeah. What about the band? Like, did the band end up hitting for all these people or did for them? They were horrible though. Yeah.

No, the bad. Dude, no, the band. y'all did they shit talk y'all or anything or like bring it up no no no no son they weren't gonna let us ruin their moment like son once we got done it was their moment you know what i mean like they wouldn't go let anything getting away of that so no they had a great set per who they are and their fans but i mean they didn't hit right they were a fucking they were a new year's eve yeah they were a cover band from salina kansas playing the fucking holiday end on new year's eve like They sucked.

Right. Do you remember their name? Fuck, no. No, not at all. That didn't hit. No, I need to ask Big Ed. I bet he remembers. Yeah.

All right. Well, I guess we can fuck off. By the way, when Drew said he needed to go, I kicked him off and he's fucking pissed off right now. That's hilarious. I thought he just, because he said he needed to go. And I was like, well, you can go. I just want to ask Corey one more thing.

And he waited for a minute. And I thought as soon as I started talking, I thought he just went. All right, fuck it. No, I kicked him out. I kicked him out. No, I kicked him out. And as soon as I did, I get text updates on my computer. And as soon as I kicked him out, like, I mean, literally 10 seconds later, I just say, you know, you're a real fucking piece of work.

So, no, I kicked him out. And he's fucking. I got to go. You're a piece of shit. So anyways, this is about to be a fun day in the thread. All right. Well, Titan's spell Monday night football tonight. I can't wait.

And I only need Derek Henry to get about 48.4 points so that I can pull it out. I'm going to lose in both my leagues this week. How about you? One of them for sure. Yeah, one of them. The other one, I'm up by like only seven points or no, maybe like three or four points. His defense is playing and my kicker is playing. Oh, yeah.

Who knows? I could very easily lose, but I might. It's going to be a toss-up. That's a fucking match-up. I will lose. Of course. I will lose. All right.

Well, let's fuck off. All right, buddy. See you by.