wellRED podcast - #202 - Anxiety, Georgia Elections, and Wonder Woman!

Episode Date: January 5, 2021

This week the boys talk about.... well, Anxiety, Georgia Elections, and Wonder Woman!  Sponsors: Lucy.Co (Promo Code RED) TalkSpace.com (Promocode WELLRED)

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion. Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

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They're the River Rednecks that makes Some people upset They got three big old dicks That you can suck A lot easier Guys, welcome to the well-red podcast W-E-L-L-R-E-D

Comedy.com That's where you can go to sign up for our newsletter So you can see us whenever we do Get back on the Dusty Trail again Also check out our sister podcast If you can't get enough of us I've got through the screen door with Corey Ryan Forster. Drew has

Into the Abisket with DJ, DJ Lewis, and of course, Trey has Evening Skews with Smart Mark. Agee boys, how are you? Yeah, not good. Gone with it. It's the first. It's the first date.

As we record this as January 4th, by the way, happy birthday Thompson. Today's his birthday, yeah. Happy birthday, buddy. Who's a big boy? He's a big boy. He's been bitching about toilet paper and stuff.

all day already, so, you know, he's in rare form. He's in somebody's house doing work stuff, and they, these people who are regular people fold their toilet paper, whether, like, not fold. You know, like in a hotel. Yeah. Not even, no, not a point, like a little, like, like an animal, like, like an origami. Like every time you take a shit, you got to do a little origami project at the end of it to make the toilet paper roll not look like a toilet paper roll.

And that has just infuriated. They're making him do it? Wait. No, no, I didn't make him do it. He just used their bathroom and saw that and was like texting me and Charles like, you'll fucking believe this shit. What the fuck? Kind of.

He's like I got to get the shit hole up, boys. First off, it's for me. But they're just, it's just somebody like, instead of playing on their phone doing that, right? No, I don't think so. I don't, I've already kind of feel. So it is for like, if you. No one who could ever connect this back to him in real life is ever going to listen to this.

Right. But still, I don't like, I already was feeling weird about making it identifiable because it's a work thing for him that he's shitting all over because they don't hit for him. Well, I'm just like, so these people are not. They're like, they're like fancy. If you went to my mom's house and you saw the toilet paper was a swan, you wouldn't think, oh, I bet Laura was just taking a shit and got.

board you'd be like no that's something that's fucking regiment around here yes yes jesus i'm like i've really pendulum to full on thompson's team then but for sure but what the funny is i thought you meant like you know how like sometimes when you come into someone's house they're like hey around here we take our shoes off so you got to take your shoes i thought like thompson had been like hey where's your turtlet and they were like okay it's right over there and before you go there's something you need to know. Yeah, right. Before you come out, you've got to turn that back into a swan.

Otherwise, you got to stay in there. So he took a shit and came out and they went and checked it. Like, hey, excuse me, I'm sorry. Yeah. Where's the Pope's Swan? Yeah, where's the Pope's Swan? We're going to need you to make a Pope's swan real quick. Yeah, so, I mean, it is different that it's just like the thing they do.

Just imagine Thompson becoming more and more radical as he's folding the Pope's mons. God damn, I do hate these rich motherfuckers. Oh, yeah, he do. Because I do like it in hotels and like my cleaning lady, she makes the point. I like that because I know where that, you know, I know they've been in there. Yeah. Again. Talk about hotels and then say my cleaning lady.

He did. Hotels and my cleaning lady do that. It's a thing. Okay. It's one specific thing they have in common is that they both make a point. I thought, I thought my cleaning lady was like just what you call all cleaning ladies at hotels. No, no, no, no. Oh, hello.

There's my cleaning lady. That sounds like a British sitcom I'd be into, my cleaning lady. But no, it does hit for me when they make the point, but yeah, I've never made it a point to make the point afterwards. Again, this is not just the point. I know it's just one. The point is totally reasonable. Yeah, the point is completely, he already sent a picture. It's just I'm going to have to do it like this way, which is what they wanted.

The point is completely reasonable to me because I agree with you. It's like an indication that they have been that they did stuff in there. Yeah. Like an hotel room or something. You're like, oh, this is a clean shithole because they've played a point. But again, and also it's very simple or whatever. This is like elaborate. It's not a poop swan.

It's more like a poop rose, I guess. But if y'all, like, bat, you see that? Jeez. You can't really see the definition. Let me pin your video for the people on YouTube. Yeah. Okay. That.

That's Thompson's hand. He sent me that picture with just profane captions. What the fuck is this shit? But anyway, you can see what we're dealing with there. Is it a cleaning lady that did it? He might have got there on the day. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah.

Yeah, you know what? You're right. Because I just got worried. Because rich people don't be doing that shit themselves. No, there's a little thing on there. There's a little sticker on there. And I freaked out again because I was like, God damn it, I think that might have. I thought they'd made like monogrammed poop road stickers or something.

You know, you know, just rich people. I started freaking out because I was like, God, I might have identified them after all that shit. I don't want to get Thompson in trouble. And then I look at it. And they probably won't mind because what it says is made pro. So it is a cleaning service. Yeah. And the cleaning lady, they do that.

That's one of the little hallmarks, I guess. Yeah. So this is all very normal. It is. Yeah, it's all fine if you have cleaning ladies or whatever. Yeah, I love this. Yeah. Right.

I'm not sure it's normal to have a cleaning lady. Oh, it's not. No. Do you guys know it is in like a lot of fucking countries? Like it's not like an upper class thing in a lot of places. Really? So it's a lot. I mean,

I've only been to like three countries, but in all of them it was a thing and not just for super rich people. Oh, well, first off, I'd like to clarify one thing just for people who are listening. I am blessed enough to have a cleaning lady every now and in. This is not like she ain't here all the goddamn time. You know what I mean?

This is like a once or twice a month thing. Not that you don't have a maid. No, no. I'm sure there's some people out there who that's enough. They're like, oh, Corey's still doing good enough to have her come twice a month. I am. That's great. But like, yeah, twice a month.

Not like, you know, where's, where's, uh, fucking, what was her name in, uh, in, uh, two and a half men, Berta. That's the level I want to get at. I can't wait until she's here every goddamn day. So the reason I said that nothing hits, uh, in addition to it being Thompson's birthday. I nearly forgot. It's the first day back to school. school and like my boys were totally fine with the virtual school thing at first but they got to a point

where they weren't any longer and it's just like the rest of the world during the first half of this school year they were still acting like by the second half things would be normal again you know what I mean like we keep we keep telling ourselves that collectively it's like oh by then it'll be fine yeah because that's that's a that's a thing for future us to worry about then and and then arrives and then also don't hit. You know, now don't hit, then don't hit either. You can bet money. Now don't hit.

No, now don't hit. Then also ain't going to hit, just so y'all know. Then ain't hit in like 18 months. But anyway, well, then is now today because they decided a while a few weeks ago officially that, you know, they were going to stay in virtual school and as opposed to my point, they were saying in the spring semester, they would be back in regular school, which the boys were. excited about but that that got cabashed a while ago and they're just they're very very fucking

over it and even after two weeks of Christmas break first day back you'd thought well maybe they recharge your batteries a little bit and they won't get it won't get shitty again for a little while but no they've both it's been ravens nothing but ravens all goddamn day today it has not hit and it's the very first day they're already talking about summer break and shit and all this well everything'll be fine by then so it's okay yeah then'll hit sure Really? Yeah, for them. Isn't he?

Yeah. And won't hit. So, yeah, it's just been just a bunch of goddamn bullshit all day and it's just the first day. But so anyway, y'all make New Year's resolutions. Well, real quick, this highlights how different our lives are. My day is not hit because I accidentally, regular dose trying to low dose mushrooms. I did my podcast with DJ and like halfway through, I was like, I don't know what he's talking about. we can't I can't be on mushrooms and with DJ and it make any line.

He's of course not. He's sure. Yeah, he's just, he's the equivalent. He's the hanging out equivalent of being on mushroom. Yes, for sure. I was like, I got to quit.

I went and walked Mick. I thought everybody was staring at me at the park. There's like a haze because it's L.A. And I was convinced it was the apoc. Anyway, I ain't had a good day either, but it was all my fault. I mean,

I guess, you know, you have a kid is your fault. How often is your mushroom trip? good. I'm saying most of the time. Okay, I'm not being a dick. Yeah, yeah, no.

Like most of the time, the other thing I guess I should say, my mushroom trip wasn't bad. It was that I was like in it without planning to be. Right, yeah, that's the worst. On my podcast, trying to control DJ, and then that kind of got me in a bad mood.

I went for a walk and I thought the world was ending for a minute. And then the sunshine was nice and the rest of the trip was good. It's just that there's no hidden story to that part. Honestly, my day's been pretty good. I'm trying to commiserate with Tray. Almost any type of fucked up that you didn't plan for just can't hit.

Like, for instance, like the other day, I ate half of what I thought was one of my CBD gommies, but it was actually a weed gummy. And it wasn't like an amount of weed that would murder me, but I did not at all want to get,

and then I was just fucking in it and like, it's miserable. Yeah, I mean, that was the first 30 minutes. It only lasts like an hour. The last 30 minutes was actually really lovely. I guess I was just trying to commiserate with Trey. But yeah, you're right if you don't expect it.

Although I guess it's different if like you weren't planning on getting high and then you find a bag of Coke. That's different because then you choose to snort the Coke. Right, right. Yeah, because like you make the active decision. Like obviously being fucked up hits, but if you weren't planning on it, that's really just not something that you want to be thrown at you. That's why, like, if somebody was to dose me with something,

I would beat the shit out of them when I came to. Well, that's what, obviously, dosing somebody is super not cool. And I was about to say, like, it seems like that's what you're talking about. You just mean, like, accidentally taking, because you say, like, if you don't mean to, but, like, you also chose to eat the weed. But that, but you're saying, well, Corey chose to eat CBD. I chose to eat CBD and it was weed. Oh, okay.

And I chose to take what I do about every four days. And here's what happened. and I'll just explain myself. It was like the bottom of the bag, and it was crumbs. And so I just was like, well, I, you know, this is a volume. I don't know how to measure this. So I took the amount of crumbs that I usually take in stalks and caps to low dose. But, you know, look, I ain't a mask guy.

All right. I don't know how it works. I got too much drugs. Yeah. It was my fault. I've never, I've actually never. had a bad mushroom trip and don't want to. Me either. I didn't, I didn't fuck mushrooms very much for a long time because I was afraid of

having a bad mushroom trip. Then I eased into it and because of easing into it, I did it like, and y'all another story, but I've done it, I did it like three or four times legitimately without getting any effect whatsoever to the point that I was starting to think that I was immune to them. And so then took quite a large amount at a hippie party, the summer solstice once with Charles and Thompson and Charles, Key Daddy and everybody else. You know, y'all know Charles. How about Charles? And, uh, whew, buddy, went to the moon, but had a really, but had a really, really, really good time doing it.

Knew I wasn't immune to them. And then, ever since then, I've only, that time in San Francisco with you, I mean, you could count on half a hand the times I've ever been mushroom since then. But they've all been, I've never had a, I've never had a bad experience. But with weed, you know, I can take two and a half milligrams of weed and end up freaking out. And, and you were asking earlier. asked you asked Drew how often does it actually hit it reminded me of one time I was when I did tie glasses podcast one of the times I did it he had all his the we were there with you weren't we yeah yeah I think this was I think this was another time because I feel like y'all weren't there for

this but maybe you were all I know is one time I was at his house and I was way too high and he pulled out the smoke machine about fucking lost my shit so that you know he's got a bunch of of comics hanging out of their stuff there's a lot of weed going on but we were about to record again. We were taking like a break and they asked me if I wanted some and I was like, no man. I was like, I got no problem with it. I was like, I just, you know, I still got to talk and I'm worried that I'll freak out. I was like, see, because I'm the type, I'm the type to freak out, you know, y'all probably don't freak out on weed and this other comic. I was just like 25 year old comic that I was talking to. He goes, he's holding the pipe and he goes, oh, dude, I freak out

probably 75% of the time. he just like hits it again. And I remember it was like right after that time. I was like, all right, we're coming back in three, too. Because I was just looking at him.

I wanted to be like, then why do you, why I quit? Why do you keep? Because that's why I quit smoking too. When I was younger, I didn't have the freakouts. Once I started having the freakouts,

that's why I backed off the shit. It's gotten a lot better for me. Go ahead. Why does it be clear, I guess, then about mushrooms? I don't think I've ever had a, bad trip.

When I've done a lot before, I've had to deal with painful things, but what happened today was emotionally? I didn't, yeah, but what happened today was simply, I was trying to, like, do a thing. Yeah. And it was a little too fucked up to just realize immediately, I don't have to do a thing. It took me like 20 minutes to get to the point where I was like, oh, there's no, there's no boss. DJ, I don't want to do this anymore.

let me go outside and then it was fine. You on mushrooms just, that's how my anxiety is every day without drugs. Like what you just described was like exactly what I have to tell myself about. Yeah, for like something very, very simple. Like I'll be freaking out and then I'll be like, hey, no one's making you do this thing. It's okay. Just chill the fuck out. So, because you're not an anxious person, right?

Me? Actually, yeah, you're a very anxious person. You're just... Mushrooms ain't what made me take 20 minutes, I guess, now that I'm thinking about it. You're right. It's just the mushrooms were just why I didn't want to do the podcast at that moment. I guess what I'm going to say is like you are an anxious person.

It's just I feel like maybe everybody feels this way about their own anxiety. I feel like I'm more anxious about way dumb or shit than you. Like I feel like every time I've seen you anxious, at least it kind of mattered. You know what I mean? I was like, I can see why he's upset about that. You know, sometimes. I can't tell if it's healthy. that my good friends validate all of my fears or not.

It's like on the one hand, I like being right. And on the other hand, I'm like, God damn, I can't tell myself that it ain't real. Corey said it was real. Everybody's just like,

no, you should be worried. You should be real worried. Me, I'm fine. I don't need to be worried. I'm like, why am I worrying all time?

Because I should, but like, if I was you, I'd really be worried. I just meant like in terms of the shit, like when we're all, ride in the car together and we're touring and shit. Like the shit that I get

worked up over in the grand scheme of things, when I get done being worked up, I'm like, that was fine. That would have been okay. But like most of that shit, I feel like don't bother Drew. Like, I'm saying I'm trying to give Drew a low key

kind of compliment and be like, look, most of the time you scream, I get it. Yeah, I guess the thing about that is, though, is this started out as ego, and now I just feel like I've been stuck in a bit for 10 years. I can't change any of it. So there's still no, like, I might be right, but like, what am I going to do? You know what I mean? Yeah. So I should also just stop worrying about it. Well, like you should stop worrying about, you know, how that guy was looking at you when we

was on the morning radio. I know. That's what I'm saying. And I'm, and I've gotten better. I have gotten better. Like morning radio guy don't matter. And I don't know Mitch McConnell. I'll never meet him in my life. Right. But that has real world implications and shit, I guess. Not for me. Like what? What are you doing? What am I going to do? Yeah, mine's gotten better.

And I mean, it literally has to be like I'm, you know, the only constant that was removed is like so much booze. Like I'm, my anxiety is not near as fucking bad. And therefore, I haven't had as bad of experiences on weed in the past like four months. And I think that's because, uh, when I take an amount of weed normally that I would freak out on, like I was freaking out on. Like I was freaking out because I was already about to have a panic attack because of the fucking booze anyways. And so, like, I've taken, like, booze away from myself. And I'm having to train myself in how to get high sober because y'all know I've always had a problem with that. But now, it's, but two and a half milligrams, though, still, like, one day I'll take that.

And it'll be like, this is great. I'm going to chill out and watch a movie. This blanket feels awesome. Next day, tolerance be damned. I'm on the fucking moon and I hate everything. Yeah. Sometimes I really wish. I'm exactly the same way when it comes.

comes to weed and I don't understand it. It don't have. When I first moved to California, I was, I thought I was really looking forward to that aspect of it because it's like, oh, it's all regulated out here. Everything is like, you know exactly how much of exactly what type of weed you are consuming. And so that means, ergo, I won't freak out anymore because I will just not take enough to allow that to accidentally happen because that's what used to happen. Because weed was the easiest thing to accidentally take too much of because you're like smoking a joint.

your buddies, whatever. You don't know how concentrated. Or they give you half a brownie that they measured. Right. Yeah. And you don't know how much that is. So you accidentally take too much. And then that don't hit.

Ballgame. Like you said, it don't, it don't matter. Now, I always take the exact same amount. No, of course it makes a huge difference. It in arguably makes it better, but it still can happen. Yeah. And that's so, that's so, it's so many different variables that go into how high you get, I guess. Yeah.

Last time you ate, what did you eat? How long have you been away? today. You know what I'm saying? No wonder you're fucked up all the time. All that shit makes a difference. Just woke up, ate a burrito, ate some weed. That's you.

I sometimes wish we had, like, a person who was an amalgamation of all of our motherly fans, just like at the middle of all these conversations, just go, so why don't y'all just not do the drugs? I don't know. I don't. No, that don't hit. No, that don't hit. And, like, because, okay, there's a difference.

yes, when it started, when I was like the dude with the pipe and it was like 70, 80% of the time I was freaking out, I did stop genuinely. And I lowered the dose. And now I can say that it's 70 or 80% of the time. It's good. My numbers have gotten better that way. Now, every now and this is I'm fucking stupid. Every now and then, which I don't know why. Because every day is a testament to how my tolerance for marijuana doesn't matter like my tolerance for everything.

I can drink, dude, on a good day, I can drink 35 beers, be fucking fine. Any other drug in the world, fucking give me all of it. I'll be okay. Marijuana, I can't look at it without getting stoned. I know. But then every now and then, like, I'll have like four good days in a row, you know, taking my 2.5 milligram and then I'll think to myself, all right, four good days in a row. You know what, though?

Today, let's really get blazed. You can handle it. And then I... What are you after on that day? What is it that you hope will happen? I don't ever try to really. I think to myself, I'm like, the 2.5 for four days in a row has just kind of me out.

I want to get, like, same vein, but just more mellow. Like, Pete Floyd, you're trying to get like Pete Floyd, Blonde? Yeah, I'm, like, that college days plays. In the past? In the past. That used to be what getting how I was for me. That's how I started lacking it in the first place. Me too.

Like, you get absolutely stony baloney, and it's fine. But what happened was it was like I was younger. It's like, you can't have a panic attack when you're young. younger because you don't know what the world is. And then I found, I did the worst thing you could do as someone who likes weed is I found out about the world. And so, but sometimes I guess like I'll just be in like such a great manic mood that I can take

all the weed in the world and I just get really high and it's okay. And I'll think that I'm in that mood. And then I'll take a full 10 milligram, you know, which I know there's so many people listen to this podcast. They're like, you're the biggest pussy. Yeah.

My mother is one of them. That's one dose. Yeah. Katie could take 10 milligrams like it ain't nothing. No problem. I've got a buddy who literally, I watched him take 60 milligrams just right in front of me. No, and dude, no problem. And I'd taken 2.5 and I was fucking blazed.

Yeah, right. I don't get it. I don't get it either. I don't get it either. I think Brian could eat a thousand. Mm-hmm. I know he could. He's one of them.

Trey, do you remember, Corey, I don't know if I, you know, was around you a lot, but you remember I had that bit about becoming a pothead late in life back when we was in Knoxville? You probably don't. You probably outside smoking. But the whole bit was what you said. said, Corey, it was like, I didn't start smoking weed until I was like 28 or 29. I skipped all the fun part. Like, I went straight to my wife hates me. Why did I choose this job?

Yeah. Yes, right. No, it's so, yeah, when you're younger, you're like a late teenager in your early 20s or something, weed is awesome for all those reasons because you don't have, you can't, you literally can't freak out. Freak out because you can't wrap your mind around how many things don't hit about the universe and the world and life and stuff. But then when you get older, like, and you have a concept of all that, you can't not freak out about how many things don't head about.

No. Except if you are real dumb. Okay, okay. There you go. It's your job. Yeah. I was about to say, like, but some people, though. Brian, you're not dumb.

I don't know what we're trying to say. I don't think Brian's dumb and he's just one of those people. Well, there are some people, physiologically or something, we just affects them differently than it affects me. Brian. Like you said, some people, like Brian can take 80 billion to be fine. Like, how the fuck? Brian's the opposite, though. Think about what Brian did.

Brian's seen the worst of the world. You know what I mean? So when you've seen the worst, then it's like, y'all can't nothing can fuck me up worse than the world's already fuck me up, I guess. I mean, I guess that could apply to you. Yeah. Yeah, I don't. But me? That's what I'm saying.

No, I was making a joke about Trace childhood being terrible. Right. Well, I don't know. Well, that's what I was wondering about. Like, what about teenagers who have a shitty situation? Which I did. I had a very shitty situation. And it didn't, I don't know.

So it just didn't. When I used to get high back then, I didn't start spiraling into only thinking about my fucking pillbilly mama and my sick dad and all this shit. Like I wasn't, I didn't used to do that. But now my brain. So, yeah, I don't know. It turns on you. It does turn on. It does.

It's how Thompson always used to put it and still does, that your first. favorite drugs would turn on you as you got older. They will. Yeah, and he's right. Well, and going back to Brian, that weed might be his favorite drug, but he used to love the drink and it turned on him. Yeah. That'll do it quick.

He's not immune. He's just immune to the weed turn it. It's one of the things that hits the least about getting older for sure. They do turn out. Because, yeah, I mean, booze is I can handle, like, I just don't drink very much anymore, which is fine. I don't regret it or I don't miss it at all, but like, it's because it turned on me. Yeah, for sure.

I used to love getting drunk. I don't really. it don't really even hit for me anymore because it kind of turned on me. Weed was the first to turn on me. That was years ago. But like, yeah, they drugs just turn on you. That's the unfortunate thing. Like, I've been living kind of a cleaner lifestyle, but like only maybe 10% of it is like,

you know, yay, hooray for Corey. It's really just that like I can't do. I can't drink as much as I used to. And like I don't like, like some people, their hangover just don't last two days. That's great. Good for you. I wish I could be that way. but mine does, and we've had a lot of shit going on.

I don't ever have like two days to give away, so I just don't get drunk anymore because I know I can't. And then it just turned into a habit, and I'm very fucking happy it turned into a habit. But like, dude, if I could function at a high-level drunk, I'd be drunk right now. Yeah, well, listen, we've got two very relevant. Yes, we do.

Segment here for y'all today. First of all, first up, you know what, drug, don't turn on you, nicotine. No, it not. Lucy, nicotine. Always there for you. Always there for it when you eat it. Chew Lucy. Lucy's got a nicotine gum with four milligrams of nicotine and three flavors,

winter green cinnamon and pomegranate. You don't like any of those. You can try the four milligram lozenges that are in the cherry ice flavor. They're discreet. You can do it anywhere. You won't have anybody up your ass and get your nicotine from Lucy because it hits chow. Or conversely, is what hits about it. You can use them anywhere.

Another regard, too, like the way Corey used it. Absolutely. I used it to inadvertently to get off of nicotine. I had not had a real cigarette in about two years, but I was vaping. I didn't really have any plans to give up the vape, honestly. But then our friends over at Lucy sent us all the gums, of which, as I said, pomegranate was my favorite because at the time I was still boozing. So if you're still boozing, I'd say go with the pomegranate because it don't screw up the taste

of your liquor, drink, or your beer, or whatever. But I started chewing it, and the next thing I know, I just, I wasn't vaping no more. It wasn't a conscious decision. I just wasn't. And then all of a sudden, I wasn't using the gum. So Lucy not only helped me get off of nicotine, but it helped me get off of itself. I don't even chew Lucy anymore. So, yeah.

So, well, red listers, you go to lucy.com. That's Lucy. dot CO and use the promo code red, RED, and you get 20% off all products, gum or lozenges. It's Lucy. It's Lucy. So, use the promo code red at checkout. We are legally required to give this disclaimer. Warning, this product contains nicotine dry from tobacco.

Nicotine is an addictive chemical. this next part is from trade. It hits. It does it, yeah. Lucy.com and be sure to use the promo code, red. We thank them for sponsoring the podcast. Now, Drew, talk about brains.

Talk about brains? Talk space. You know, whenever I talk to people why they don't go to therapy, I always say it's because it's too expensive, but let's have some real talk. How much do you spend on coffee every day? Or nicotine or sweatsuits or whatever the hell.

That was specifically for me. Don't pouries out there drinking coffee, chewing cigarettes, and buying another sweatsuit. God damn, that boy needs to talk to somebody. Is that stuff really more important in your mental health show? With Talkspace, you can take care of your mental health without dipping into your savings account right now.

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Yeah. Talkspace also has thousands of licensed therapists with years of experience in over 40 specialties, including depression, anxiety, substance abuse, trauma, anger management, relationship issues, food, and eating. Boy, that's just mine, so much more. All the classics, but yeah, absolutely. And you may be listening and thinking, well, that's just this podcast, so why would I do this? But guys, talking to your friends is so different from talking to a licensed therapist who has the expertise and knowledge to give a person practical guidance. Talkspace will give you the support that you.

need at an affordable price. As a listener of this podcast, you get $100 off your first month with Talkspace. To match with a license therapist today, go to Talkspace.com or download the app and make sure you use the code well-read to get $100 off your first month and show your support for the show. So that's well-read at Talkspace.com. $100 off. Your brain can't afford not to do it. That's right.

When we think of both for sponsoring the podcast, listen, all this talk about weed and all that is related to something I wanted to bring up, actually. And it's about how like, like we were saying, as you get older and your drugs turn on you and your brain turns on you and all this stuff. But it's just why another thing that occurred to me recently, this isn't some novel thing. Plenty of people have talked about and had this experience. But like, and I tweeted the thing about it at the time.

I was, uh, y'all, you ever listen to like old, like, old music that, uh, like you grew up with, like 90s music or whatever, you know what I mean? Because like it hits. And you have nostalgia, right? And it's like it puts you in a good mood. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

All the time. Right. That's mainly when I'm about to get fucked up, I make sure to have something close by that's that. Yeah. Right. So the other day, like a few days ago now, it was like sometime around the holidays. I was just feeling some nostalgia stuff.

So I put on a random. I didn't check it. I just went to a 90s, a 90s playlist on Spotify and just put it on. and just put it on random. At first, I mean, it was slapping. It was fucking no diggedy and Mariah Carey and all kinds of other shit. And then 15 minutes later, I'm standing in the kitchen just staring out the window, shaking my head like, God damn, man, what the fuck.

These hands are small, I know. Because Jewel came on, you were meant for me, right? That's what, which I, of course, remember as a kid. And, like, not only I remember it, I, like, remembered every word of it, but I never used to, like, when you're a kid, you don't think about what. the words are. They're just sequential to, yeah. I hadn't heard that song in years, but I still remembered the words, but I thought about it

for the first time in my life as like a 35 year old man. And I'm in a happy marriage and it's a breakup song, but still, dude, that song is fucking brutal. It's absolutely fucking brutal, man. This is an example of when you're young, the not hits can't seep in. That's right. That's what I'm saying. I know.

And I know I brought this up, but y'all talk about. amongst yourselves for like five minutes. I'll be right back. Y'all can keep going on. I don't know. I'll take this phone call and waiting on all goddamn date. Yeah, when you're, when you are younger, it, none of that matters because I do this. I do the same thing with a fuck. There's a cranberry song. Linger. Dude, when I was a kid, I just, you know, do you have to let it. And then like as an adult, I listen to it, and especially now that she's passed away, like just absolutely freak smooth the fuck out. Well, dude, rap. You know, rap was, was always about hitting or it was

about gangster stuff. Yes. Or it was about the brutal reality of growing up in the ghetto. Yes. And we'd just be out there like, you know what I mean?

My homie died at 13. That's the same album. That's on the same motherfucking album too. Right. Right. You know what I mean? Like every now and then,

like I would get the same song, Joe. We fucking these hos but pour one out for the ones who died. Yeah. Like they'd get me with the titties in the cars and then I would leave knowing way more about the struggle

than I had intended on knowing like before I got there. But yeah, man, like it's super intense music and whatnot. Well, I had, so here's a nostalgic question for you. And I won't try to answer this too. But I was, it's funny he brought up to nostalgia because I was thinking about, so there's music where you're like, we've talked about it with country music, where you're like, is not his country good or was I just eight?

And now I remember feeling that way. Yeah. Right. And you can't ever know otherwise. There's no way to put that genie back in a bottle. So please, pardon me the sacrilege of this question. Okay. Could our mammals cook?

I have actually thought about that. Because like... Like, no, I've thought about that. Paul Dean got made fun of by the world. Now, she hits. She does hit, but all I'm saying is there's a reason French and Italian food is considered world-class. and ours is very niche. Yeah.

Okay. Okay. You mean our type of food. You don't mean specifically our mammals. No, it's both. Yeah, I was about to say because no,

when it comes to like our food, I believe like, because dude, there's places, like fried chicken places come up all over the place. And I think that like, I think that southern food is,

well, I mean, yeah, no, it's not like French, Italian, Mexican, the South.

Like it, it, they don't get that type of reckoning. But I don't know, soul food, dude. Like, it's, it comes up in more play. I don't, I think it's just. Okay, yeah, you're probably right. Yeah, you're right.

So then let's make it personal. Could your mama cook? I'd like to think so, but at the same time, I can't, like, everything I'm remembering that my granny bang cooked was good, but like, I'm like, yeah, but my mom's is better. Because I really, the mom's a great cook. Like, I really think there's a lot of it that, like, when I remember my granny's mashed potatoes, I'm like, I made better ones. I made better.

Like, I would love to have hers right now. because that meant she made them. And my mom's cornbreads better than my grannies. My granny's beans was the shit. But that was mainly... She used fat back where, like, a lot of restaurants didn't use fat back. Sure, but that's like saying, well, the only reason it was good is because she made it good. You know what I mean?

Right, right. No, no, no. I understand. No, no, I understand. But, like, my granny only did like six or seven things. And they were all very much comfort food. And it... It's possible my, it's possible my granny wasn't the best cook in the world, maybe.

It's possible. So, Mamoff, Ding, Dane, was a great cook. But she only could cook, she only did cook, like, eight things. Yeah, yeah, that's Granny Ben, too. Mamma Flo, like, I loved her pancakes. But, like, the more I think about it, she just made pancakes out of the box. Yeah, Biskwick, yeah. And she put sugar in them.

Yeah. And then she let me have all the syrup I wanted. Like, you know, mom or dad would pour the syrup for me. She just handed me the syrup. Yeah, that does hit harder. What got me thinking about this is I thought we had, I was looking at the freezer and I thought we had pizza rolls. I saw a bag and I was like, oh shit. You saw the yellow and you were like, yeah.

And it was some bullshit fruit, Andy bought to put in the damn freezer. Oh, that's stupid. And I was like, well, that's on me though, because there's no way I would have left pizza rolls in the freezer. It's never made it past two days. Yeah, right. That's why, like, I've never once looked at an expiration date on a jar of peanut butter.

It's good. It's good. If it's at my house, that motherfucker's only been here for about three days. So then I thought, do I like pizza? Are pizza rose good? Or is it just like, this was me when I was 12? And then it was like, wait a minute, is anything I ate when I was 12 good? Or do I just wish that I had no responsibilities and was watching Batman the animated

series while somebody made me food. I thought about this yesterday because I saw, I follow on Instagram quite a bit of like food, whether it be profiles or like just hashtags. Like I just follow the hashtag ramen. So anytime anyone hashtags ramen, that shit comes up on my thing. Also hashtag snacks, hashtag 90s snacks. So it was brought to my attention yesterday that Pillsbury in what, in my opinion, in the hottest collaboration of the year

is collabing with Dunkerose to make a... Collab! Yeah, so you know, are you, did you... Did Dunker's hit for you? Did I fuck with Dunkerose? Yeah, yeah. And I did a little, but...

God damn, this is so funny. We, we, mom was like, I ain't buying you that bullshit. Mm-hmm. And then one of our babysitters or somebody, like, one of my aunts who, like, you know, you rotate with you stay with after school, with your cousins.

At some point, we had money, so I don't know. what you're talking about. Right. So at some point Dunkeroo's came into my life, and when it did, it was like, it was like, it had to be an aunt because it was very much like, oh, did my sister buy you Dunkeroo? Well, then I'm going to buy you every kind of dunkeroo, young man. Hell yeah. But I was wondering yesterday when I saw that, like, I haven't had a Dunkeroo in a very long

time. And in my mind, as soon as I saw the Dunkerrower, I just like, I mean, you know, weld up with emotion. I could almost taste it. And I was thinking to myself, because I don't think. they make them no more, right? I have no idea. You'd just think that I would have had a Dunkeroo in the past five years.

It's safe to say? If you made me bet every dime I had right now. That's what I'm in the country. The Georgia election. That's what I'm saying. So to me, I'm like, well, if Dunker's is just coming back for a, you know, a McRib one-off, like, did they ever hit? Because, like, how... Does the McRib hit?

Fuck, no, the McRib don't hit. Maybe I'm alone in... fat, fat, dumb idiots, but like, because I think that, like,

I'm the type of person that people will be like, I feel like people look at me and go, that boy counts the days until the McRib is back. You know what I mean? And I've got a couple friends who, like,

I'm just, don't I look like that? I've got a couple friends who, like, you know, the McRib comes back and they're like, dude,

it's the fucking best. And I'm like, first off, you're trash. It's trash. Are they comedians? Do what? Are they comedians?

Are they comedians? comedians? No. But I'm certain that Dave Waite and Joe Pettis both like the goddamn McRib, too. That's what you're getting at. I mean, you know, yeah, if they can afford one. Sorry, guys. I'm not editing that out.

Only one of them deserve that. You guys can decide which one. Fight to the death. We'll give you $5. Jesus. Okay, you did it. No, I know. I was jisusing me.

He always is. Hey. The McRib thing. people being like, oh my God, I can't wait. That's just marketing that's worked. Of course. Yeah, it does. And by that, I don't even mean those people don't like it.

Yeah. They may like it. But the whole, like, I count the days, people without a personality, but who like very much want to be online. Yeah. You have to substitute something for that personality. For sure. Oh, dude, nothing makes me matter when someone's like entire, like, there's, right now is a good example. There's so many people whose entire personality is that they like.

like, lattes. Like, literally, that's their whole, like, that's their whole being, like,

they're, you mean in your hometown or on the internet? Internet, both. And both. Yeah, I think it's like,

that old thing, like, you know, like, don't, don't talk to me unless I've had my coffee. Like,

there's people that, that's their whole personality. Like, they, they've got a shirt that says, not until I've had my coffee. They've got a coffee mug. Yeah,

and I think it's just like, yeah, or wine. It's just evolved to now it's lattes and pumpkin spice and shit like that. But the McRib is like, dude, here's the deal.

If you know anything, I'm not, of course there's some people that like the McRib, a fucking, a lid for every pot as it says. But like, if the McRib hit for most people,

McDonald's would sell it all the time every day. They clearly make more money off of doing it this way. It's the only way they would ever sell a lot of them. Because if they just had them out for all the time, people would go, oh yeah, these don't hit.

Yeah, or like too many people would get sick and die, whatever the fuck is in. Yeah. So I can deal with that. Because you know there's some dude who four McRib launches in a row has gone, took a bite and went, oh, yeah, don't hit.

But four in a row, he's gone and forgot. Like that fat people have like that hormone that pregnant ladies, you know the hormone that pregnant ladies have that when they have the baby, it makes them forget how painful the baby process was. I think it's literally oxytocin. Okay. Well, pregnant ladies got a shit ton of that. They do. No, I think it's the same.

They call it the love chemical and it's what's in the best pain pills. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So fat people got that, but for the McRib. As soon as they eat the McRib and it don't hit for them, they forget how much it don't hit for them. And then the McRib commercial comes back on. It triggers them and they go get it and then they're disappointed again. I mean, dude, I wouldn't put it past McDonald's. Don't give me on some Alex Jones shit with whatever they got going on and their chemicals and they're fucking. Some of that shit's like right up front.

you know how much sodium is in it and then the studies it's like studies came out about how addictive sodium was and then the next month McDonald's sodium you know what I mean? Starbucks Starbucks is pretty open that their cat their coffee just has way more caffeine. That's the secret. How's this coffee so good? It's just got more of the drug in it. Yeah, because I don't, I'm not trying to be like a cool hipster type dude here, but Starbucks really don't hit like taste like taste wise.

dude, it's whatever. I mean, I'm not saying it's bad either. And I'm not saying you're an idiot for your local Starbucks is right around the corner from your apartment. Go there, whatever. But like, it's not like, oh, my God, just light years above taste wise. Like, no, it's convenient and they jack that shit full of caffeine, which makes you think it's good. The culture surrounding coffee, I like, but also have that, I do have that cynical thing. So it's like, it's really wild that human beings figured out how to run.

goes these beans and pour hot water over it. Amazing. And it's steam the milk. And this guy likes it that way, but this guy wants hers cold. But at the same time, it's like, that's an awful lot. Just do the drug. You just, that's what this is about. Yeah, I feel that way.

Oh, I like milk in mine. Yeah, dairy is also a type of drug. Yeah, it's all there. But like, I feel the same way too, but basically like, of course I've got my complicated drink that I like. But then if it gets any more complicated than the complication I have, I'm like, okay now you've gone too far but like i agree like we just just fucking go get a no dose from the goddamn gas station they're way cheap and have a have a diet dr pepper you want that more you know

like that's what that's what you want right but at the same time it does hit for me like you know i like french something i don't understand always hits for me me too i mean i and i do love going to get a cop like when me and you're on the road we'd be like hey you want to want to go get a coffee. And I'm like, I'm like, oh, yeah, that sounds nice. If you were just like, hey, do you want to go get a Dr. Pepper? I'd be like, fuck out of here. I'm like, no, I don't want to go get a Dr. Pepper with you.

I read one time that it was like an article and it was like a big deal that Coca-Cola surpassed tea sales in India that the afternoon tea was becoming the afternoon. Oh, I thought you meant like the shit like tea sales. Like, like, uh, ain't that like some age? Like, I was like, God damn. Bad does India got it. I thought, I was like,

motherfucker. There's more Coke than there are T sales in India. Lord. Like, I know McDonald's got a billion served,

but like, that's some shit, dude. You just freaked me. God, there ain't no wonder they're struggling over there.

Fuck. I'm not kidding. Like, I'm a little high, but like when you said, what did you say? That Coca-Cola had passed tea sales.

That freaked me out. That freaks me out. Dude, but fuck, I don't know where to go with that. So going back to what we were talking about, you're right about on the road, like going to have a coffee is, it's nice, it smells good.

I came very close. I was searching for an affordable espresso machine for Andy as a gift because I don't even drink espresso. It makes me feel terrible. Then I realized, it doesn't bother me that she goes and buys it or anything like that. I just, and I was like,

oh, I just want to smell it. I wish my kitchen smelled like a coffee shop every morning. That would rule. No, I understand that. Like, yeah, like a coffee candle. That would be sweet. I'm the same way with a, I, okay, like, smelling someone's clothes that have like just went out.

No, well, yes, technically, when they smell like cigarettes, don't hit for me. But like the faint smell of a cigarette just being puffed still kind of hits for me. It kind of reminds me of a bar or something like that. That goes one of the top three or four essential oils that they put in Cologne. Oh, word. That checks out. Tray, it's talking. A real sweet, earthy smell.

Trey, to bring this back around when you left. You only talking about Jules no more? Y'all didn't talk about Jules for 12 straight minutes. No, no, no, not at all. We did talk about nostalgia. We talked about nostalgia and Drew, talking about nostalgia, Drew positive the question of, since we're all very nostalgic people and, like, we used the McGill, I believe is the catalyst to jump into this.

But like... It was the other way around. But it don't matter. Oh, yeah, you're right. Did your... Do you think looking back, your grandma was actually a really good cook or is it just a lot of nostalgia? Oh, man. Well, one of my...

He's done this. Maimau's... Oh, God. He made me learn, too. Maimaw's still alive, you know. And Mama Cat is not. She's been dead and gone for a long time. now.

And one of, I bet. The one that's dead. Yeah. I feel like such a turncoat piece of shit right now. Yeah. I'm trying to be diplomatic about it. Meemaw, I now, now that I know about cooking and stuff.

Yeah. The things that me might be doing. Yeah. I'm not overly impressed by. However. However, they like, somehow, and I don't know if it's just all that love, all that love she pours into it or what, but somehow it's still very much hits for me. And it's like, is it in a stout, is it because it always, I was a fat ass kid and hit for me real hard back then. Is that it still?

Because you know, her chicken and dumplings, her macaroni, her meat, her, uh, all that much. It sounds or it tastes exactly the same today as it did when my fat, fuck ass was nine years old. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. And so it still hits for me. It still hits for me. But now I know about cooking. And so I know that it's like, oh, that's what you've been doing this whole time.

That's what that was this whole time. Does it taste good to you though? Mama cat, though. Yeah. Who wee, boy. Yeah. Flames. She's how I got so goddamn fat.

But like she, you know, been dead for 10 years. I don't know why that is. She just did it too hard. Right. Like, too much lard, too much salt, just like, it was grease. It was grease. I just, uh, it was so good. I just imagine some sassy old, uh, old Southern woman being like,

and that's why her husband's still alive. That bitch can't cook. Yeah, for sure. That's what, in my mind, I was like, yeah, if you're like, uh, if you're so, if you're a woman in the South up to a certain age and you've made it, I'm like, you must have turned your jersey in like, you know, like a while back. you couldn't still be doing that. Like, my heroes don't wear capes, but they only got one foot.

You know what I'm saying? Yes. Well, like, I had a, I had a great-grandma that lived to be almost a hundred. If your pap was alive, your mama couldn't cook. Yeah, exactly. I had a great-grandma that lived to be almost 100, and by the time I, by the time I, you know, can remember going to her house and stuff, I mean, she was 90 already. You know what I mean? And, like, unsurprisingly, because of exactly what we're talking about.

somewhere along the line or whatever, she had, you know, she cooked very healthily for a, she still made beans and stuff like that, but it just weren't as much lard and saw all the things that make a hit. Right. She had, like, cut out

because that was bad for you. And it was bad for it. It's like, it's not a coincidence that she lived to be 100, but also, like, that stuff was garbage, God. Yeah, she lived a long time. Over there, I'd be like,

what is this shit? Yeah. Trey with this sweet old lady's dick. in his hand. Yeah. It was not, it for me at all. Turning my fat nose up at that bullshit.

But, you know, and she would tell us, she's like, well, that's how you live a long time. And like, well,

if you ain't going to be hitting for any of that time, then fuck it. Dude, I just very recently, and this is not good. Like, it took me 33 years

to finally get over the whole, like, well, look, listen, I'd rather live to 62 and do every goddamn thing that I want to do then live to fucking 85

and have to eat granola. You know what I mean? I've absolutely had that attitude until four months ago. And now, like, you know what I'm saying? Like, obviously I like stuff that hits more, but like, you man, at one, some of these motherfuckers in our past,

like, our, you know, poor mama cat, and all, they just kept going. You know what I mean? They just kept going. Mama Dine Dane didn't go. I mean, I had a bit about it. She would limp to the freezer to get her Mayfield ice cream and make her biscuits and then eat her dessert. She made biscuits with Mayfield ice cream?

What's that? She made biscuits with ice cream? No, I'm just saying all that these are the things she ate. Biscuits in the morning, sweet tea and ice cream in afternoon. Of course. Every day. And she had a missing, a foot, God damn it. She had a foot with no toes on it.

Oh. because of diabetes. They didn't just take the whole foot. They were just like... Sugar, took her toes. Buddy. You get your speedboat. Oh, man.

All them piggies went to market. Oh, right on. Man, I wish that we were... I wish that we were, us three, this podcast, us as a group, comedy group, we're like smart and enterprising because, Drew, what was it? You said, if your papov's alive, your grandma couldn't cook, is that what you said? That's such a great t-shirt. That'd be such a wonderful t-shirt, but we're never...

We can easily get somebody to put that on a t-shirt. I know we could. That's how stupid we are. We could easily do it. We will not do it. But I spent like $400 making five Gypsy Speedboat t-shirts just to give them to y'all. Yeah, that's true.

Amber wore mine the other night to sleep, and I got a little hard. I ain't know why. Well, yeah. They hit for me. Nice ringer tea with some big ass tities. She's wearing my band's t-shirt, Gypsy Speedboat, top of it. why was you talking about smelling cigarette smoke on people's clothes and stuff?

We had madmaws still? Yeah, I don't, Druid, Drew had just went upside my head with something. Oh, what was it? Say the Senate, Hey, Mama Cat only smelled like cigarettes and coffee, so like I could see how that might have all been connected.

Say the sentence that you said to me that tripped me the fuck up. Oh, no. Say it to Trey about India. Oh. I read an article. I read an article a few years ago. Apparently, Coca-Cola had surpassed T-cells in India. Mm-hmm.

And Corey thought... I thought this motherfucker meant like the shit AIDS patients have. Like, what? T-sails, motherfucker. Oh! Dude, I'm a little high, and I thought... Dude, I swear to God. I didn't even follow...

It didn't even cross my mind that it was anything else. Like, he said, Coca-Cola has surpassed T-cells India and I was like either Coke is hitting or India is in bad fucking shape. So you mean you thought their blood was made up more of Coca-Cola than tea sales at this point in time? No, I guess I just thought that they had a collective very low T-cell count and there were more coke. But a real high Coca-Cola count.

Yeah. Like all that just, I'm a little high and it just hit me on. And it took me like obviously that's the dumbest shit that you could think after someone's that's what Drew said. But I firmly. believed it for like three whole seconds and when just think I said it he got upset by the news tray yeah I hate to hear that about it don't yeah dude I was about anyway back to coffee so no I don't no I don't remember why we were talking oh we were talking about nostalgic sense and how coffee is a bit

much and how he wanted a coffee smelling candle and I said that I like the faint smell of a cigarette I think it does, I think the faint smell of a cigarette, I'm just like, oh, where's the lunch lady? You know what I mean? Like, it just reminds me of being home. Like, not a full-on cigarette. Just like somebody smoked right here like an hour ago. This is, again, you know, just fucking, hey, it was the 90s in the South. What are you going to do?

But, like, talking about Mama Cat, like, as a fat, fuck little kid, I loved the way her cigarette smelled. I'm not going to lie to you. I was like, I want one of those real bad. I bet you did. They put something in them. All the nicotine, I guess, makes a hit. I don't know. They wanted kids to smell that.

Of course they do. Give me that. And it worked on me because I just sit there stairs. You know, because we're in like, she lived in the projects of Salina, like a tiny little apartment. You know, she's just in her hot boxing it with all her grandkids all goddamn down. Other people's grandkids. Dricking a 32. Yeah.

You know, half of them's deader in jail. Weird how that works too. but not drinking coffee I have a 32 ounce fucking like trucker thermos and just chain smoking Winston Reds dude winston flavors and like it hit for me I can't believe she's dead I'm so grossed out in retrospect thinking about it at the time though I loved it I thought it smelled great in there yeah I loved it was that all that mixed with fucking fish grease and shit yeah it was I bet it was never not fish grease. That smell of fish grease that's like hard to go away.

I bet it just always smelled like a restaurant at Mama Kat's house. Mama Kat ran Katz Cafe, a restaurant on the square in Salina. And yeah, her apartment smelled just like the back of the restaurant, which is all that stuff. We just said it was, yeah, nostalgic as fuck. If I smelled her apartment right now, bring a tear to my eye. Not because like I'd be, you know, choking and shit. Right, right, right.

eyes watering type of tear, like a heart filled tear. Me and DJ have a new recurring bit that I think you guys will get immediately where he was talking about how it's sometimes hard to talk about the red and the way he wants to. Yeah. Like, because it's hard to express to other people how funny it is. Right. And not just staring.

We're right. When you hear the people on the Wonderful Whites of West Virginia go, they took her baby. So me and him now, about every 10 minutes, one of us just go, they took her baby. Baby. Yeah. Right. Well,

DJ texted about that, and I texted this story, which is true, when I was like, my sons are eight and nine now when the oldest one was a baby, so almost 10 years ago, nine years ago,

so a while ago, in my house, I grew up in Salina across the street, the family that had lived across the street for years, the girl who was around my age, she had a baby, and they had took her baby away.

And what that meant was, was we got all of that baby food. Hell yeah. I was like, well, we ain't got no baby no more. Y'all got a baby right. You need this baby food.

Role tied. Yeah, and me mom's like, hell yeah, they need that baby food. Me'amaw called me anyway. Like, I'm saying,

when we found out, we was like popping bottles. They were like, hey, they took our baby away. We got to look at all this free baby. Yeah. They call that to hook up,

you know, like we were happy about it. And I had already started doing stand up at that time. Like very freshly started doing stand up at that time. And what you DJ said, what you just said, and I told you that story, and I said, which is true, at the time, I tried to turn that into a stand-up bit. And it never hit.

Like, the general response was always like, oh, my God. That's real fucked up and sad. You know, and I was per dancing. Meat in the jar, baby, meeting a jar. Oh, oh, oh. Because they took her baby as undeniably one of the five or six saddest sentences in the world. Yeah, right. right for sure but it's so goddain

she didn't need no baby she didn't need no baby that baby was better off and y'all were better off for having that goddamn baby's food you think they would have taken the baby's food with it you know what I mean like hey hey come here and get this goddamn baby we're keeping the fucking food though we're gonna give it to tray yeah oh that is what happened though oh my god that's hilarious You remember, it's like, I said that bitch don't need no baby. That was the playoff of, you remember, oh, Bob, I called him Bob. It named what and Bob. Big guy Bob, a guy's monkey took away.

Oh, yeah, poor Bob. Yeah, Barb, at Barb, also a, uh, Barb at the time was all over Bob's Facebook. That bitch don't need no monkey, Bob. Dude, go in there and get your goddamn monkey back. For those of you that don't know what Trey's talking about, he's referring to a story that we brought, well, Trey broke on our,

did you break it on the Tiger King podcast? Oh shit, I forgot it, yeah. But what my point is is that, I think I talked about it on here, whatever, it would,

Tiger King or the podcast, whatever, but it got told. It sounds like, it seems like that was. Years ago. Both years ago and yesterday. Yesterday.

But like, mainly, that's 20, so somebody pointed out, they were like, man, it's crazy. This is obviously,

this is January 4th now this was back in December. Someone was like, man, isn't it crazy that like, y'all did that Tiger King podcast this year? And I was like, yes, very much. And that was too,

we were like, you know what? I guess if we're going to have to be in quarantine a couple more weeks. We better find something to do. We better find something to do. That's exactly what it was like. I know.

Like, had we known that this was going to take forever, we'd just been like, well, we're not doing this. We can't do nothing. We can just go back to not doing shit. That was it and just,

you're 100% right there absolutely would have done exactly that have we now we're like no hell no you're doing that shit no fuck that on that note did we

let's get the fuck out of here yeah I was going to say we have another thing we're working on in that game but yeah i you know that's up to you oh yeah yeah yeah go ahead i'm sorry dude i'm a little high and that fucking just got all over me now you know what that's a good tease this is the cliffhanger folks tune in next week and we'll make a huge announcement yeah there you go i guess right tune in next week

although i want to do something but i want i wanted to do it at this point so anyone who wants to leave can leave because i'm dying to spend like five minutes talking about the new wonder woman movie. But I know you ain't seen it and now anybody that's listening if you don't want spoilers for Wonder Woman or whatever if you give a shit about that, then you should just leave. But can we... Dying to talk about it. I'm going to give you your five minutes and I'm never going to watch

it so I'll hang out just to hear you talk. He said, and for the 18 million time of his life. But Corey, not even being serious, I just want to know what the mood is in Georgia two days before the runoff. Well, again, as

I've answered pretty much every time someone's asked me at any point during this year, what's the mode like in Georgia? I don't fucking know because I ain't going out there. Didn't you say you saw some signs in your home count? Signs, why, okay, yes. Just as far as that goes now. And I told y'all that during the general, the actual election, like the Trump election, that one, presidential one, that's what it's called.

Corey, you fucking it. During that main one, that big one we had. That big one they did. During the main event. They had that. They had the super bowl. of elections. That one.

I saw a couple Biden-Harris signs, and to me, I'm like, man, it's like, you know, I related it to that bit that Dave Chappelle did about, like, there's a serial rapist, and he's been accused of raping seven men. Well, he must have to rape thousands

because that's a hard conversation for them men to have. I felt the same way. I was like, if two people felt comfortable putting them signs up, then there's probably 25 people, people that didn't. Maybe. I mean, I don't know what math you can use on that.

It's called a magical math. Yeah. But I saw some Osaf signs and a couple in like pretty prominent areas in Chikamaga. And my point is like... It's still the white one. Yeah, I know. Dude, yeah. Trust me.

Warnock's still having a hard time over here. But like, my point is like, the fact that people around this area are comfortable enough doing that means that I think to them they're like we've been talking and we think this is going to go a certain way so we don't give a fuck if they know now

you know. Because like me, I'm one of the most outspoken motherfuckers. Y'all know, let alone period from this town and even me here like I get nervous sometimes about shit being in my yard or like just go, I'm afraid I'm going to get egged or like punched or some shit. So like

and I and I hit like I don't know. I'm just I'm saying like I'm just saying there's, there's, you know, these little old liberal ladies, they break them motherfuckers in half, you know what I mean? Like, I could see shutting the fuck up, you know? Like, I can whoop a motherfucker's ass. I still shut the fuck up.

You know, I'm high, boy, I'm high. Don't know what I'm doing. I'm tough, but these old ladies, that ain't shit. And I mean, I'm out of it. I'm done. You're a little old mama if you thought how'd you whip her ass. Well, think about that. You've seen her.

You go rip in there and just whip her ass. Take that sign. I can even, like, it ain't a mama cat old lady either. Like, it's one skinny bitches. So, anyways, so I seen them, I saw those scene, I saw them signs. And also, you know, we got the new pride flag on my

street that somebody has put up. So, like, I think what has happened is a bunch of the folks who left Chickamauga to go be gay in California had to move home during the pandemic.

You know what I mean? And now they're here putting up their rainbows and their off-s off-sides. Either way, they're up. And also, if you couple that with fact that Donald Trump is literally telling people not to vote. Like, I don't know. It seems like a perfect storm for these fucking idiots to lose. Cautiously optimistic.

Me too. I don't want to jinx anything. I agree with everything you just said. I think you're 100% right about all that. But yeah, I just don't. I'm still, I still hesitate to, you know, be too excited or too optimistic. Of course not. I certainly hope so.

All right. So starting right now, Wonderworm and spoilers. Yeah. Turn it off if you care about Wonder Woman. It's impossible to spoil this movie, I think. Cho, I'm going to get water. Did she rape a guy or not? I think she raped that guy.

She raped Wonder Woman, raped a man. And then, you know, like, look, I don't got, who gives a shit? I wrote down a couple things, actually, and I didn't even know you's going to talk about this on here. Let me get my notes. Like, again, I'm presupposing in this conversation, if you're listening to us, you've seen the movie. But so I'm saying, like, I just, here's how I feel about it. I feel like, look, it's a fucking Wonder Woman movie. Every other single thing about it is ridiculous.

Okay. 80% of it don't make no goddamn sense. No. So, considering all that, are, like, are you being, is it, is it silly to even take the storyline with her boyfriend serious enough to say, oh, that's right. I mean, probably. I mean, probably. But if you're being a.

objective about what happens in it, though. I don't know how you could literally possibly make an argument that it wasn't rape. No. Because it's a real dude. Yeah. It's a real dude with a real life and a real body who gets his consciousness taken away so Chris Pine can live in his body for a while. And he wakes back up later.

He wakes back up to his normal life in that interim period while he was unconscious, but his body was up and running around. Yeah. he got fucked literally. He got his ass whipped in the White House in front of cameras. So like he's a terrorist now. Right. And he didn't have no choice in none of that.

Like why not just make Chris Pine come back to life? It's a magical wishing rock. Just make him come back. Why even do all that if you're not going to address any of that shit that I just said? Absolutely. None of that made sense. Like the whole, first off, first off, the movie starts with a goddamn, let's say this, first off, the first movie really, Wonder Woman really hit for me.

Yeah, I liked it. Really hit for me. So that's the thing is that like tonally, I understand like, okay, Thor Ragnarok was a little different tonally than the other two Thor's, mainly because the other two Thor's didn't really hit. Right. That's why. So they kind of went in this crazy different direction and they let a new director come in. I'm about saying new director's new team too.

And that happened. Not the case for Wonder Woman. Right. Not the case for Wonder Woman. And also the first Wonder Woman dead hit. Yeah, right. And it's the same people. Right.

So why on God's, if you've established this is the tone that Wonder Woman's going to have, this kind of dark, but like more realistic, gritty thing that like Christopher Nolan was able to do in the DC universe and make it work. They did that with Wonder Woman. It worked. It was great. Then to me, they were sort of doing like, okay, let's go with more of a Doctor Strange kind of Thor Ragnarok tone for this one. But out of nowhere, for no reason.

And then now all these rules established in the first was like, well, none of that shit matters because there's a fucking wishing rock. First off, first off, we got another comic book movie where they're chasing a stone. Awesome. Secondly, it's a wishing to make a wish. Now, I would like to say something for anybody listening going like, I don't know, I kind of liked it. First off, you wild. Secondly, Pedro Piscall was still acting his motherfucking ass off, son. I thought Chris Pine was really good.

Everybody did good. Honestly, not one of the actors is to blame for this movie been bad. Everybody in it was fine. Kristen Wigg was fine as the Cheetah. There's no goddamn point. The Cheetah is one of Wonder Woman's main fucking villains, like ever, and she's a goddamn side story and shit. She also is, and now, like, I want to give this movie the benefit of doubt in so many places, and this is one of them what I'm about to say, because it's like, okay, were they doing some kind

of John Hughes movie homage thing because it was the 80s? But like, the Cheetah is also, she's like the girl in the paint covered overalls, the ponytail, you know what I mean? She's like, oh, no one likes me. Boys don't like. And it's like, Eeyore. And it's like, and then she just like lets her hair down. Yeah.

It's like, oh, my God. She's like, gorgeous all of a thing. It takes off her glasses. Yeah. And it's like, that's just, I just can't believe that they, I don't know. And then her big breaking bad moment as the Cheetah was not a breaking bad moment, in my opinion. She beat the shit out of a dude who tried to rape her twice. Like, that's okay.

You can do that. The whole time. You're not a villain. That's not a villain move. No. They played it like, this is the same where she becomes a villain. And it's like, no. She sees Leon, her homeless friend.

and he goes, what is going on? She's just like, mind your fucking business, Leon. It's like, if you just told Leon this dude a couple nights ago tried to rape me, he'd been like, I'm glad you beat that motherfucker's ass. That's awesome. Should we call the cops? When Leon walked up, I thought she was going to end up snapping and like accidentally killing him or something because that would be a villain moment.

And it would have hit. But this fucking, this drunk rapist getting what furred by her, like, that's not. That ain't. That was fine. That's not a villain moment. That's fine. She didn't even kill him. I know.

This is way better than the movie. Dude, like how many times did you audibly go, what the fuck is going on right now? That scene in the desert where she's in that convoy and she like swings out to save those kids and she absolutely killed those kids on the concrete. Because she like grabs them and slams kid first. Slammed kid first into the concrete barrel rolls at 80 miles an hour. and then these little Arab kids get up and they're like waving flowers and shit. By the way, she did that to avoid this convoy of tank armored vehicles that were coming down the road.

She did that in the event. They just went around them. Like, she stayed in the middle of the road with the kids. Like, am I making sense here, Drew? There were kids playing in the road. First of all, how dumb are these fucking kids? She didn't even take them out of the road? Kids playing in the road.

It's like these kids don't know how to play car or, you know, car, game on. I'm like, they don't have that in Iraq or whatever, apparently, in the 80s. These kids are playing. She swings out to save them and just lands in the road with them again, very violently. And then the convoy just like drives around them. Like it was the most pointless, ridiculous fucking thing. Was this added in because Galgadoo is considered very, very anti-Mill East? Oh, this movie was too.

yeah it very was very it didn't work they had this oil chic like fucking yeah who who who who ends up basically wishing for the gaza strip yeah yeah like on a wishing stone and then it fucking just happens because Pedro Pascall Drew Pedro Pascall finds this ancient wishing stone right he wishes he then he decides he you know how like the old like I'm that movie and that movie alone. You know the old like, I'm going to wish for more wishes. Well, he thinks of a way, a dumber thing to do, which is when he gets

it, he wishes to become it. So he himself is the wishing stone. So in order for him to get what he wants, he has to have people touch him and then have them say the thing that they wish for and then he can grant it and then take away

their shit because it's a monkey paw thing. Okay, right. Okay. I was, okay. It's a monkey's pall situation. And by the way, how do you know it's a monkey Paul situation? They said it seven times. They also got told it by a Mayan shaman living in New York, played by an Indian guy whose name was Frank Patel and had a goddamn had a goddamn Mayan book of secrets or whatever.

And they don't, if you're thinking, oh, I'm sure they make all that sort of make sense. No, they don't. And also, where was the wishing stone? before he got it, just in Kristen Wiggs' office. Who's evil? So the monkey's not really. But she didn't use it as my point. She had it and just didn't use it.

She did. She wished, once she figured out what it was. She wished to stop raping her. No, she wished to be more like Diana. And that turned her into a superhero. Who's Diana? Wonder Woman. Then, like, oh, God, dude.

There were so many times where it's like they did this ridiculous stuff. And in my head, I'm like, Why didn't you just do X instead? Like, for example, the part at the end, like the way, there's two options. You can either destroy the stone, which now that he has become the stone, that means you've got to kill Pedro Pascal, which I who don't love Pedro Pascal. I get that that's hard. But you can either kill Pedro Pascal or every person, every person who has been granted a wish has to renounce their wish. Dude.

Say to the universe, I renounce my wish. So at the end, he's broadcasting across the, uh, the, uh, the entire. entire world on a satellite system telling them, if you make a wish, I'll grant it right now. So seven billion people are like prayers. People are wishing dead relatives to come back. People are wishing their cancer away. But because it's a monkey's policy, this is also ending the world at the same time. So Wonder Woman's got to stop that.

She gets on the broadcast and gives them a heroic follow your heart speech. And apparently every single goddamn one of those seven billion people renounce their wish and everything was fine. even though it had showed multiple times in the movie, he tricked people into making wishes. They didn't even know they had made. How can you renounce a wish you didn't even know you made it? Tori. And this is what I'm saying,

why not, if you don't want to have Wonder Woman kill the guy, fine. Okay, you refuse to have her kill the main villain. That's okay. Why not have it just be to where if he renounces his wish,

he undoes everything. So you only have to convince one guy, not seven fucking billion. And he did. Also, you know how, when you get something like electronic and it's made in China and you go to read the instructions and like

it don't make no, it's in English, but it ain't really making no sense and it kind of says the opposite. Well, who translated this to most of the world when she made this right? Right, yes. They do, they've given the show it's implied that everyone's making wishes

and then everyone renounces them, but they show a fucking insurgent in the desert wish for his own nuclear weapon. Yes. Hear Wonder Woman's heroic speech, look to the camera and say in Arabic, I renounce my wish. I'm gonna love it, whatever.

And his fucking nuclear weapon goes away. What? Yes, I swear to God. This is the first movie all the time. Oh, it's something else. So let me, also let me, for those of you who decided to listen, but aren't going to watch the movie,

when we say that people said renounce their wish, we very much mean verbatim. And also, just to give you kind of more of an example of what that sounded like in the movie, if you remember the episode of the office where Michael Scott has to declare bankruptcy and so he just walks out and goes, I declare bankruptcy! It's exactly like that, but I renounce my wish and everyone's like the fucking climax of the movie is Pedro Pascall with his eyes bleeding because he has become

the living and embodiment of a monkey Paul going, I renounce my wish. And then the world fucking like resets. It was, dude, it was so. So what an insane drop-off from the first one. I don't know. So, again, this Monkees Paul wishing stone that is now Pedro Pascal, it can materialize out of thin air, a fucking great wall of Egypt, a literal gigantic wall that separates Egypt.

Nuclear weapons hurtling through the air, it can manifest out of nowhere, but it can't just bring dead Chris Pine back to life. He has to somehow get put into another dude's body. Makes no sense. You might think,

well, it's a monkey's paw, though. That's the thing. That's the conflict. Right. Which would be, I think that, I actually think that would have hit

if they would have dealt with that. You bet they didn't. If either one of them, Chris Pine or Wonder Woman, gave any indication that they understood how fucked up that was. Like, if they had dealt with it, if they, if he would have been like, look, we can't do that.

This is not my body. Like, this dude has a life. I can't. This is wrong. You know, like, that would have been interesting. But they didn't do any of that. They just raped him. Right.

So if you're not going to do any of that at all, she had sex with this dude and this other guy's body. And then the other guy, he got his body back after that. So it's like he blacked out. It's like he blacked out for. 36 hours. And when he came to, he had been had sex with,

beat the fuck up, wanted for murder. He's a terrorist now. He's a terrorist. It's like somebody got your wife's heart, so you just think you should be able to fuck that person. Right. And I'm saying it's a,

that's a weird thing for Wonder Woman to not think about. Right. Or Chris Pines and like, and so I go back to if you're not going to do any of that, which they didn't, they just ignored it completely. Then why even put him in another dude's, It makes no sense.

Just wish him out of thin air like you did the nukes and the wall. Also, as my buddy, as my buddy Matt Coon over it through the screen door podcast pointed out to me before I watched the movie, he said, get ready for the president of the United States to yada yada, teleportation, which he did. But also, now that I'm thinking about it, because that was supposed to be Reagan. And because you see the, yeah, that guy didn't hit. No, he didn't hit. but I was like, are they trying to do Reagan?

Then I looked over and I saw this huge thing of jelly beans. So I was like, they're definitely trying to do Reagan. But like, if I think about it now, it was an Alzheimer's joke. Because, so what happens is Pedro Pascal, he wishes to have a meeting with the president, but he doesn't transport to the White House. The whole White House just transports to him. And he's sitting there and he's face to face with Reagan. And Reagan's like, wait a minute, I'm in a different place.

And he's like, no, you're, what? And he goes, and then Reagan just goes, huh, hectic day. That was it. Like, that was the whole thing. Like, he just teleported. And he's like, oh, you know, fucking being the president,

kind of wild, ain't it? And then, yeah, and then he made him shoot noops. I don't know what it was. And that was an Alzheimer's joke because Reagan got Alzheimer's? Reagan, in his later years of presidency, they were saying that he was suffering from the early onset Alzheimer's, and that's why he was becoming very, very forgetful and shit like that. And so, to me,

Flo would ask us where RL was. RL left my mom-in-law when she got Alzheimer's. And that was very painful. At some point, though, we just realized if we just wait, she'll forget. Just don't answer. She'll forget she asked us. Yeah. Yeah, there's parts of it that hit.

Also, what about that fucking jet plane? So she works at the Smithsonian. She works at the Smithsonian. Dude. They need to get to Egypt. Luckily, the Smithsonian has a fueled up, fully operational, F-18 with a runway, an air traffic control tower, and a World War I pilot who knows how to fly that all the way to Egypt from D.C. and they just get in this jet and just fly to Egypt and back

and don't address none. That's Wonder Woman famously has an invisible jet. She makes it invisible just because Wonder Woman has invisible jet, but they don't ever like use none of that again. And it's like... Speaking of her making stuff, how about how about she taught herself to fly. She taught herself to fly. And then stop flying. She taught herself to fly. And then stopped flying and started lassoing fucking lightning bolts and shit. It's like, why are you doing that if you can fly now? Also, this takes place before Justice League and all that shit. And it's like, she would have been working. Did they let like a bot write this? No, it's just, I don't, I don't know about the writer. It's kind of seems

like that. But it's the, it's the same director that's so lauded in a claim. I think of like picks out what trends and it always becomes racist or whatever, but like it feels like this is some sort of superhero madlib. It is. We take every scene from every action film. You're right. You're right, but here's why. Not because it was a bot or a robot.

I guarantee you this script is a Frankenstein's monster of the 30 different scripts that they had versions of from 30 different writers in this process. because that's what happens. They bring in somebody to write it. They end up getting the credit, but then they rewrite it with another guy because they're like, oh, this don't hit.

He takes some stuff out, leave some stuff in, still don't hit. They bring in a team. They put a bunch of script doctors in a room together with the script. They're like, y'all fix this shit, and it just gets like fucking chipped away at

and changed and shit. And then at the end of the day, the director can take whatever's left and throw any of it out, add anything in, whatever. And you can just, I feel like you can tell, but for the reasons you just said

that it's a bunch of different, it's a bunch of different drafts of the same general script. Like this was a holdover from a previous draft, but we lost, like I saw a theory that said Chris Price. But don't that work sometimes? Yeah, I mean, that's what big budget Hollywood movies always are,

and sometimes it works great. Like, to me, then, that doesn't explain how it happened to you. Because I think when it works, they do a better job of, like, disguising that that is what happened. Are you blaming the director? It's fine if you are. I'm just trying to figure out what you mean. I mean, I don't know who else you could blame.

I'm back to Corey, no, all right, let's just, let's say fuck it. I'm about to die. We can say fuck it. Corey got to pay and I'm so bad. But I've watched that movie like on Christmas night or the night after it and I've been wanting to talk about ever since because it blew my mind with how insane it is and Corey just watched it. It sounds terrible.

Yeah, I kind of recommend it. I know. It sounds like a cold classic. No, we're actually talking. We're about to talk about it on my other podcast through the screen door and like in a larger segment. And that's why I watched it last night. and Coon texted me

and I was texting him all this shit and he's like, I'm so glad that you fucking hate this movie too and I was like, eh, I don't think I hate it. It's just, it's just wild.

I can't stop thinking about it and it's wild as hell. Like I said, I almost weirdly kind of recommend it. Me too. Because it's so out there. Yeah, I think if I watched it again,

I'd be like, well, I mean, that was fun. Because that's the thing, it was fun. It was fun. All over the goddamn place.

So like, I can't. I don't know. It's just, it's convoluted and fucking out there. What did you say? Landed Child First. How did you phrase that? Yeah, she scooped her up and then landed child first. And A Miles now are on the asphalt and then they just got up and hugged her or whatever.

I'm going to do that. Ridiculous. Anyway, all right, thank you all for joining us. See you next week. Love you, bye. Thank you all for listening to the well-read show. We love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next week.

If you got nothing to do. do. Thank you God bless you. Good night and skee. Fuck a butt. Bye. Bye. They're the

liberal red necks they like cornbread, but sex they care way too much but don't give a fun. They're the liberal rednecks that makes some people upset but they got three big old

dicks that you can suck. Thank you.