wellRED podcast - #225 - Living in The Past, Lawyer Stuff, and THE NOID!

Episode Date: June 16, 2021

This week the boys talk about a variety of dumbs shit and also oh yeah WE ARE GOING BACK ON THE ROAD GO TO WELLREDCOMEDY.COM FOR TICKETS

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion, because you used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like, you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie, I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now, skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people, people across the skewniverse, I should say. Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery,

getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low mane? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better, and it's called Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions,

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So I was like, I should know Spanish. I'll learn Spanish. and I've just been paying to learn Spanish without practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that. Also, a fun one, I'd said it before, but I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know,

put your friend's faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball-looking twin fellas. Yeah, so that was money. What was that in response to? What was that a reply gift for?

Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten. If it wasn't for Rocket Money, I never would have even figured it out. So shout out to them. They help.

If you're money dumb like me, Rocket Money can help. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney. dot com slash well read today that's rocket money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast. They're the liberal red necks they like cornbread but sex they care way too much but don't give a fun. They're the liberal rednecks that make

Some people upset But they got three big old dicks That you can suck I're hitting Oh shit You look fine I lost 10 pounds at the beach Suck it

Yeah you do that Because I gained 15 at the other beach How'd you lose it at the beach? I didn't drink And I worked out every day Yeah I did some cardio And I did bands

and I only, I exclusively ate oysters and grilled fish. Dude, like, ever since childhood, because I was a fact kid, ever since childhood, I have been a yo-yo person. I'm yo-yo-fat. Me too. You know. Right, I know, but I'm saying, so, like, I know what that's like, but, like, for me, it's months at a time.

Yeah. Spent up or down. You, yeah. Yo-yo at a rate, like, like, a fucking Asian ticotker you yo-yo, dude. That's how hard you're yo-yoing. My heart's going to expand. Do you need, do you get man titties when you're yo-yo?

Oh, yeah. I mean, you need a yo-yo bra. There, there is. Nice. I should have known that you didn't actually care. But yeah, yeah, no, I'm starting to like, I did the bands last week. And I'm also someone who like, it can go, it can get out of hand in a hurry, but I can also reel it back in a hurry.

Like, if I want to start looking good, like it don't take that long. Like, if I cut out a little bit of salt, drink a lot of water, start literally just doing push-ups and stuff. It's like, within a week,

I'm like, oh, shit, you're getting, like, you're starting to get musily. But then two, just in two days of like,

I got, get drunk and have Taco Bell. It's completely back to, you look like the fucking senator from the first X-Man on the table. When he finds out he's filled with water, I look like that guy. I don't hit. Yeah, that's a good reference.

What's the salt do? It makes you retain water. Okay. It's a huge, that's a huge thing with me, which is why like, you're like, guy, how can you fluctuate 12 to 13 pounds in a week? Well, I'll tell you, eat the amount of salt I normally eat, and then the next week don't do that. Because I need to eat a lot of salt.

Like, I just, I didn't realize how much salt I ate. Because, like, you don't even think about it. You're just like, yeah, salt hits. I'll put it on that, you know? you're not a blood pressure thing yeah but my blood pressure is amazing surprisingly like that's because uh you have no guilt right shame it does help that does it's true stress is worse than fucking salt and beer but the thing is that Keith Richards man he ain't ever felt bad his whole life but the thing is that like I hear you like I don't

have no guilt or shame right like yeah but I did but I am like you know I'm constantly super stressed and like on the verge of a psychotic break so like I don't know that I seem to have anxiety, but also be calm. That's part of like the weird show energy, though, man. It's like you say you're anxious and you seem anxious. I totally believe you. But then you also aren't. Well, what it is is that I don't worry about the things that normal person should worry about.

And I worry about things that it's stupid to worry about. Like, I will work, like, I can't really give a good example. It's just everything in my life, I might constantly say, oh, my God, my God, but like if but like the other day we had a problem with our bank where like they stopped horse bank yeah we're like we didn't realize that we hadn't moved something over and we were actually in an account we weren't in one of our accounts weren't supposed to be in there wasn't shit in it and we overdrew and like it was like we had somehow fucked ourselves out of like $650 and ember almost had a panic and I was like hey what are you going to do we're on the beach and I was like are you

fucking serious right now and I was like yeah I mean was it matter and she's He's like, it's $650. It's like, yeah, but we'll probably get it back because it was a mistake on there. Like, the horse bank's in. And also like, yeah, I'm not going to ruin my day over money. And like, that's a thing you should be fucking worried about. And I was like, whatever. But like.

Related thing and talk about almost having a panic attack and this will lead into, I want to talk about, you know, our big exciting announcement. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I was already put up behind us. I definitely want to talk about that. But I'm going to lead into it by saying yesterday I got on Delta Airlines. We all are Delta Medaubalien.

members. And so I always fuck with Delta. And I got on Delta for the first time in over a year, obviously, to look at flights to the Atlanta area. And the only available options were all first class tickets that were expensive as hell on every single flight they had. Everything else was completely sold out. Then I looked at Birmingham, which is a couple weeks later,

and everything was completely sold out. So in my head, I start. fucking really freaking out because what I thought I would freak out of that. What I thought it happened was there were like 80% fewer flights now or something because of the pandemic and everything than there used to be

and because of that they're selling out way quicker and I've already missed the boat because like I got to get to the south in July. Yeah. And I started fucking freaking out. I called Delta and their app was just broke. That's all it was. Nice. It was just the app was just fucked up and they were in a process

of fixing it. But I was I would have freaked out on that. I thought I had fucked up real bad for a minute there. That would have freaked me out because that has to do with your career. Those are the things I get stressed about. But it's not the month. It's not like, oh, I can't do this gig so therefore I won't have the money. It's just like if it has something to do with my jokes and my comedy career and something's going to, I get, I freak the fuck out about that.

And you might be like, well, Tray. Did you not check Spirit Airlines? I'd rather just lose my career. Dude, absolutely. Are you kidding me? You guys are wrong about Spirit. No, I would rather go back. Just buy the first two rows.

I will buy a spirit airplane before I ever buy a spirit ticket. We are, of course, talking about the fact that we're going back on the road. Fucking totally in less than a month, we will be back on the road starting. And what I believe is the absolutely perfect city for us to kick the tires again. Atlanta, Georgia on July 10th. Lord, that's going to hit. It is. We haven't been there in three years.

I'm not saying we haven't been to Atlanta. Atlanta's a great town for us, you know, for all various reasons, I feel like, you know, fucking liberal in the South. But we haven't been there in like three years because we had a couple of different shows that fucking fell apart. Just shit just happens, you know, no drama or nothing. Shit just happens. So we haven't been there in like three years. And now it's going to be our first date back after this big hiatus. And it's going to be, the crowd's going to be rowdy, I'm sure.

And we're going to be fucking pumped up. It's going to be awesome. And I cannot wait. Also, you mentioned Birmingham. That's the 23rd and 24th of July. So we got two cities this month. I'm so pumped. We've got a bunch of other dates that are on the website.

So you go to well-read comedy.com. Still our website. Still doing it. But a lot of the, you know, this is a huge fucking logistical process getting, it's not just our tour. It's everybody's. Everybody's. It's rough.

So like, we're still working through all of that. So if you look, A, we're still adding cities. B, you might see your city, but not have a ticket link yet. It will be up eventually. we're just trying we're working on it yeah and and look if and like if if if you're from a city that we play a lot and you're like oh I don't see it we're probably coming it's just like you know he said it's a huge logistical thing it's been wild because I don't know y'all mean how you are personally dealing with it but like you know we used to promote and tour just on a rolling basis

like we started the tour and then it's just like all right we'll take a few weeks off but then we're promote promote from her this has been like starting all over again and it has really been it's really been unnerving and like crazy uh but I'm, but like a lot of it is because I'm just like, let's just go. Let's just go right now. I'll just set up some pews in a barn. I don't care. But yeah, I'm super excited.

I'm super excited to be in Atlanta where like I said, we haven't been there in three years. I really genuinely don't know what to expect. I mean, I'm working on my act. I know I've got a good show coming. I don't know how to expect our crowd to behave because I feel like it's going to be like bedlam in a way, but like I don't, but I'm excited about that. I'm genuinely, I think I'm going to cry. I think I think I'm going to cry.

Well, I've been doing it in the South with DJ on and off for a month now. You should expect appreciative crowds, excited crowds. There was a few times, man, I was like, that's the best set I've ever had. I can't believe I'm still this good at comedy. And then I went back and listened to tape and I was, I was fine. Yeah, I was about to ask that question. But they're just loving it. They just love it, dude.

They're just loving it. We'll have some Russ, Drew might not. But me and Corey surely will. I'm going to have plenty of stuff. It ain't gone, yeah. I'm sure that's true. I have now, I've been on stage one time in the past year and a half, and it was like five days ago.

Last Thursday, I did a show in L.A. And I, so it was outdoors, because California just opened back up literally today. So it was like an outdoors show, which anybody knows anything about comedy knows. That's not ideal. No, it don't hit. Like a park or something.

I got it. got there and it was actually on a golf course in Venice, but it's not just a golf course. It's like the bar that's on the golf course is like a hip local hangout spot in Venice. So I get there. It's outdoors. There are a shitload of people. So I was pumped there. There were a lot of people there.

But they were there just to drink and hang out. Like comedy was about to happen to them. Yeah. Yeah. That's the worst. And there's kids there and shit. It's daylight. You know.

My God, not necessarily a tub berth for you there. Exactly. I haven't been on stage. 18 months. I see all this. And it was almost kind of in a way relieving. Right. Because you're like, it's going to suck. Because I was like, dude, look. Right. What are you going to do? This is just going to be what it's going to be. You haven't done it in 18 months. Plus all these other factors fucking, you know, let yourself have this one.

Yeah, for sure. And then I fucking murdered. It was one of the better shows I've ever had in LA, period. And so, yeah, I'm fucking super pumped to do. it again. It's going to hit. Me too, man. I'm excited to be out. And I'm excited, man. I'm excited we're going to come to your city as long as Delta flies there. If not, Tray ain't fucking coming. They are there, but also, of course, I would, I would fucking take a train or whatever.

The trains do that. We'll drive. I would have gotten there. I do want to go on a train tour one day. It's so hard logistically. No, I know. I've got Scott Miller, who was on the podcast, did an Amtrak tour. Yeah.

Now he had to have his equipment, but he was just. talking about logistically in timing. Like, trains don't be, don't be running every hour. No, no. We know what I mean? We've looked into it before. There's been multiple times where we've had like this city and then the next city of the next night and we've been like, hey, we should take a train.

Yeah, and we never do. Every time, the only time we've ever taken a train. Jersey. New York to Jersey, which is totally different thing. You have to take a train everywhere there. Right. Well, a lot of times if you remember. It's hard to take a train.

Well, it was also like $20 cheaper than a flight and way less convenient, you know. Yeah. Yeah. But I love the idea of a train. Yeah, it wasn't, it was never for the convenient. And all of, whenever I say something wild like that, like I want to do a train tour, that's always me speaking in a fantasy world where this is Corey who's already made it and it gets to set up this little cush thing. You know what I mean? Like, oh, this year we'll do this gimmick tour where you only do trains or you only play old bed and breakfast that were haunted. You know, that's a fantasy world. But no, fucking, if Delta ain't there, you know, whatever. You know how tours, it was all politicians, but ignoring that part, you know how tours used to be like from the back of a train? You would have hit at that, I think. I would have hit it.

Dude, I would have hit it. All of the trains just rolling through, like fucking little fucking gold towns or whatever. And then some guy looks like you in a fucking top hat or whatever walks out on the back of the caboose and it's just like, you know, hear you. Hey, yeah. I'm so glad you're saying this. The show has arrived in your tank. Drew ain't buying it.

I'm confused. They used to do shows from the train. Of course. Again, I think it was mostly politicians, but what they would hit at that. They would, because, you know, what else were they going to do? Fucking horse and carriages and shit, they would. Yeah. Tours were routed with trains and what they would do is they just stopped.

The train would stop and they would like step out onto the back of the caboose, like the platform. And everybody would gather around the back of the train and they'd do their set, you know, fucking Thomas Jefferson's a hoodie wink or whatever. and then they get back in there and leave. James Jefferson's probably too early for that. I don't, I know you don't. That was anachronistic and not that funny.

I don't think you know this. I don't think you know this, which is great. We're talking about going back on the road and I'm talking about how I've written this new act. One of the jokes in the middle of my act right now that I'm working on fleshing out is about how hard I would have hit

in the late 1800s, early 1900s. Yeah. Because of an argument that me and my wife had about which one of us would have lasted the longest during the Depression. Because we ran out of shit to argue about during the pandemic. In the argument and or the bit, do you have money? No.

Well, I mean, I get it. It was like, no, I don't have money. It's just which one of us with the skills that we both present day have, that we both like just, we only have, we're not different people. It's us, the skills that we present day have. Yeah. Who would make it the furthest?

And like, dude, It begins and ends with Imagine me on camera falling off a ladder. You know what I mean? And I'm having to talking silent movie star. I'm still thinking like the train. I was thinking of

I would. You're talking like fatty R buckle shit. For sure you'd hit it that. I would hit it all those things. I was going to pitch you. You would no doubt hit it. But how would you work your way in? Like what would you do

the first two years on the car? Bodbill. He would need like one of those carts and either he's selling some sort of mirror. cure to all the rube's in the old west or whatever. I can do that. Okay.

He could have done that. Or in his cart, he's got some, like, dwarves and a couple donkeys or something, and it's like a traveling road show. He's got to get them, though. Where he's like a lion tamer. But they got him. How could I not get him? Like, he would hit it that.

I think he would hit it. I'm worried. He would hit it all of that. I'm worried about the first two weeks to six weeks trying to settle that up while Amber can. He don't think he could talk. knows how. A donkey into going on the road with him in 1894 or whatever.

I don't know. Maybe, like, you know, he might not have the right vernacular. They'd be like, stab him. It's a future man and cut his throat. All I've got to do is make it longer than Amber, though. I don't have to like really. But she can suck a dick. Yeah, but she doesn't.

She doesn't do that. But this is we're going to survive. She doesn't cook a lot and she's mouthy. Not really your ideal 20s broad. You know what I'm saying? I hear you, but at the same time, y'all got a big house. She's surviving in 2021. Well, yeah, now.

It's easy to survive now. We've been talking about two. I mean, I'm here you. Find a room. Who bought a big house for this fucking video money? We've been talking about two different eras, kind of. But in 19, 15 or whatever, Cho had gotten on a train and gotten off in Hollywood

with just an onion in his pocket and a twink in his eye. That's my puppet. It looks like me. Yeah. I think he could All he would have to do is just fall down in front of the right person For sure For sure.

Back then, looking like me was way better than looking like me now. Do you have the knowledge you have now in this scenario So you know how silent movies were? He would have to talk different, I think, for sure. He would have to learn how to talk. I want to be in a movie, see? I want a man, see.

I want a movie, see? Yeah, come here, see? All I got says onion. See, I didn't eat half of it. Yeah. Where's that woman with my carrot? Just whatever. I just feel like Amber's point is that you don't have skills other than entertainment. That was her point.

It was harder to do stuff back then. That was her point. The argument literally started off. Here's how the argument literally started off. We were sitting there drunk as fuck. And we were watching, I don't know what, maybe it was our brother, we're right now again. And she was just like, what do you think? Which one of us do you think would have survived the longest back then?

I was like, is that really where we're at? And I was like, I'd have fucking hit back then. and it was she goes she goes yeah but like they were men and I was like yeah and she was like I'm just saying and I was like okay but like you're acting like

every single person back then was someone who just built cabinets for people who built cabinets and then at the end of the day they were like well building cabinets and then they just got fucking shit face and then they went down to the dock to look for X-W there was other shit to do. You know what I mean? And also, the reason that they were men back then is because they fucking had to be men back then. Like everybody's like, oh yeah, the World War II generation,

they're way tougher. It's like, yeah, okay, well, I don't know. If I'd have got drafted in Iraq, I think I'd be pretty tough shit. Like if they'd have made me go, you know what I'm saying? And I'm not taking anything away from those people. I'm just saying, if I was back then, then I would have been like them. You know what I'm saying? Or I'd have died. My question is just simply, can you get over that first time? I have no doubt that if you get the orange salesman job, you would work your way up, murder at it, and then I think it's, and I'm not,

I think it's in arguably more competitive in my business nowadays. I was about to say this. I'm not, I'm not sold on the idea that it was harder to do then if you knew to try to do it. Do it. Yeah. Talent or whatever. And I'm the same.

Well, to be clear, I'm not a suggestion for, or whatever. Cho was fucking arguably he was born in the wrong era. He would have crushed in vaudeville. I agree with all that. He could have done off. I'm not arguing that it's harder back then.

It just is not going to happen in week three. Like it was going to take him six months. And my question, Trey, is, you know, it took Corey years here, but he had his grandma in house. He knew how to,

there was like he had a painting job. You could have got a painting job, maybe. Did they have paint back then? I could, yeah, I could have invented paint. Yeah,

he could have been in bed of time. See, Drew, you asked if he had all his knowledge and stuff. Honestly, this is kind of cheating. I don't think we should even do this because, like, but if he did have all his knowledge and went back to that era, he could just start doing all the famous fucking bits and shit that he could have been on first or whatever. Exactly. You know, but I think we got a.

No, I don't know. I can't do that. That ain't fair. According to Corey, Amber, don't know shit. So that wouldn't help her at all. It should be who's on first. Come on. No.

I'm gonna say. It was a joke where she couldn't do anything. He could have been like the Dr. Pepper shot or something. The flaming shot girl. Yeah. Yeah.

She would be able to get on those boostie ace. You know, like a shot girl walking around. Dude. Swinging 20s. Like hooters or something. Amber, Amber would have passed out in a fucking mud puddle and got polio day fucking

fucking three. All right. I promise. Especially, this would be during Prohibition. She would have fucking had to find some bathtub gin, son of a bitch. You know what I mean?

Like she, dude, she wouldn't have, I mean, yeah, okay, blonde, big boobs like small.

I'd say she also was the perfect type for back then too. She was, she was for sure. That ain't no doubt. That ain't no doubt. What if there was like a button

that somebody hit in the movie and Corey has to watch what actually happens if things got reversed and he ended up a horror and she ended up a famous star. That'd be fine. That would be a good movie.

I would like to see that. Like if this is like, we got a time machine and this was our first application of it was just like, all right, I'll show you, we'll fucking go back there and see who makes it. And then we end up, we end up together anyways,

probably. It's a not hitting life. It's a not, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, so yeah,

that's, that's, I'm working on that. So I'm going to listen back to this episode and take all those tags. I appreciate that. Oh, yeah. Speaking of,

go ahead. Well, you all remember about donkey basketball? Because I've done the joke now six times. A monkey. It's been different every time. And I forgot the monkey. How do you forget the monkey?

Literally first thing came to my head was the monkey. Because my bit came from what actually happened to me. And then I went back to hear what Scott said because Scott was talking about the monkey. Now, when I tell the joke, I'm going to say the monkey was at my show too. But we didn't get the monkey. Why y'all think we pronounce donkey and monkey different? Some people don't. Some people say donkey.

Oh, yeah. Okay. Really? Yeah. Yeah, donkey. Look at all new don't know that donkey. There's a monkey on that donkey. There's a monkey on that donkey.

I want that t-shirt. Yeah. I want that t-shirt. There's a monkey on that t-shirt. There's a monkey on that donkey. You start pulling that thread of like English words and why they don't sound the same. Yeah. It's so impressive to me when anyone who English isn't their first language learns this God-forsaken language.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah, oh, dude, for sure. If you, we all take it for granted because we like, we, first thing we learned how to do. Yeah. Like, it like, like no God. Just literally just like the biggest, the most cliche example, I guess is probably there, there, there and there. Yeah, right.

And like, yeah, that's stupid or whatever. But like, there's so many more dumb ones that are just insane. Like, it doesn't make any, like, why do I don't, I mean, I guess it's because we took from a lot of other things and then there was a lot of adapting of those words and then once you get, but it just, yeah, no. I mean, ain't it like, ain't it, ain't it? Go ahead. It feels like we're trying to oppress them further.

Yeah, right. And if you want to get ahead, learn our language. And good fucking luck. Good luck. We don't even know it, queer. We don't. But, like, isn't it, like, easier, like, isn't it easier to learn, like, Mandarin than English? Like, English is one of the hardest fucking ones, right?

I don't, I mean, I've heard English is one of the harder ones, but I think Mandarin is also up there. Because I know that they have, like, they have literally the exact same word. but the tone, the voice, changes the meaning of it. And I can't even hardly. But isn't that kind of what there and there and there is too? And in some ways? Well, they're spelled different.

I'm talking about my understanding is it. And you hear it. It's literally the same word. It's just the way you say it determines, like, what the word means or whatever. Like, never tell you what my papal used to say. Wild as hell. Never tell you what my papal used to say when he heard Mexicans talk.

I'm sorry. I don't think he did, not publicly anyway, but go ahead. It's actually not that bad considering he just would, he would be, you know, listening to him talk. And then he would just get this big grin on his face and he'd just turn around to us and go, now how do they understand that? He could not conceptualize that they all spoke that and that it was no different. He's just like, but he would, he would. again, here's why it's not that bad.

He wouldn't go, God damn it. They knew. He wouldn't. He literally was out. That was just dumb. It was just dumb. But it was like, he was impressed. He was just like,

both ahead of and behind his time. Exactly. Yeah. How do I understand that? He was a big, dumb sweetheart. I don't know. Well, he was otherwise a dick. That was like a sweet thing that he said.

But yeah, no, but yeah, he wouldn't get mad. He was just like he couldn't understand how the fuck they could understand it. And it was always tickled. Like what in his head, they were interpreting it happening there? Well, in his head, his head was. What do you think that is?

That they're translating English. That they know the word for Rose is, you know, Rosa or whatever. Yeah. Like, which is crazy. I think also it was a speed thing to him. Like it sounds like they're talking faster.

Because like now in his defense, not that not that Mexicans talk faster than Americans, but they damn sure talk faster than my papal did, like southerners. You know what I mean? Like, mamma and papal talk like this. Make sure you can hear everything they say. And then goddamn, you know, of course, they got to get them chips and salsa orders in. Like, shit's happening.

You know what I mean? Like that's where we were. You know what I mean? Like, dude, if you're not, as somebody who's tried to learn Spanish like eight different times in my life. Really? I can't believe you're admitting that right now. And kind of sort of.

just don't stick with it. Yeah, right. That's the only thing. It's not that it's beyond me. I just quit fucking with it. It's like guitar, you know? Yeah. I just bought a keyboard, by the way.

Yeah, right. It'll be like that, probably. It will be. But anyway, I can, if you put Spanish in front of it written down, I could probably parse it well enough to tell you, like, what it says. I can understand it when they're saying it. But when they are speaking, someone speaking Spanish, I might pick up every third or fourth word, maybe.

And it's because it sounds way. too, I just want to be like, please slow down and I might understand it, but obviously I'm not going to say that. But it sounds like it's way faster, probably because my brain be slow. Right. When it comes to Spanish, you know, not as right. Well, it's not innate.

You're probably still filtering it, correct? Absolutely, but dude. I think that's when the speed comes, is when you stop interpreting and you just hear it. Right. I'm nowhere remotely close to that. Corey, I want you to train a cat to play the keyboard with you.

And the fat one, and you can name it, Trey, that would hit. And I think that you guys could write songs. And look, man, I don't know what you want in life, but you could buy a huge house, I think, if you did that. I think it's just as likely that I train a fat cat to play the keyboard with me as it is for me just by myself to learn how to play this keyboard. So I may as well do it. Yeah.

And I was thinking is if you could somehow throw your voice like an angelicist and you can make the cat say all the stuff that you don't want to say, like, Jeff, what's his name? Dunham. I think I can do that. The way his puppets are racist, so he's not somehow or whatever. Like, you can make your cat, you know, like, I don't know. What do you, like, have really, really bad views on vegans or something?

I don't know what you're at to. Is it? Is it? Cats are obligate carnivores, so that wouldn't make sense. That's funny, actually. It's a cat who fucking hates. Hates vegans. He's like a hack comic who hates vegans or whatever.

That's funny. That's a funny. A big fat guy. Especially because it's like, there ain't no danger of carnival is eating him in this country. So like, you know,

it's like, you know, all the vegans, he's a fucking hat. Like some fucking, like a cow. Fuck you, cat's easy for you to say.

You piece of shit. Hey, speaking of Jeff Dunham, I just, well, I just know had a moment of like clarity. Like, Jeff Dunn and Dunham does,

he makes his puppets racist. So it's like not him being racist. Is that, Is that different than when I do like Uncle Keith on stage? Granted, he's not ever trying to slam his, it's not any different? I hope not because I do the same thing. We all do that, right?

No, I'm saying I hope it is different. Like inhabit the red, we do like a redneck character and say something horrible and it's fine. Because they're the, if that stops being fine, we all done for it. Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, for sure. For sure. I think what Corey's getting at is it, he's asking, is it different because I, I get the sense that Dunham,

agrees with his puppets. Right, right, right, right. Like, I don't know enough about him, but our point is always to make our uncle in those bits. Look, dumb. Right, like, and I don't know if that's his goal or not. I don't watch him enough.

No, I don't either, but I'll say, it is different. I'll say that I know some of the people that like Jeff Dunham, and they definitely like those jokes because they believe them, and they would hate, they would hate the one,

I do. And my rule sort of like if I could boil it down to anything is like my test for like is this joke okay to say is like who does it bother? Who does it bother? And if it's my uncle Keith then it's fine. And I'm like well that's good that's who I want to piss off. But like

I don't know that it just hit me. I was like the problem with that. We don't have to. But I think we we it goes fine for us. We don't ever get in trouble for this. It's fine. I'm just saying like it has. Never once. It has happened every now and then. Like that, yes, the joke is aimed at how stupid Uncle Keith is or whatever. Right.

But some people might hear what Uncle Keith said, what you say as Uncle Keith. Yeah, if you take it out of context. And get upset by that, even though the point of it is this is such a stupid thing for him to believe. And then say, still something might, you know, take it to other thing. Like that time we were in Asheville, we can't worry about your own motherfuckers. Yeah, for sure. We were like worry about that. We were in Asheville that time.

and that and Amber. That's exactly what I was thinking of. Yeah, I just don't remember that. Like that guy was like running out and screaming and Amber was out there. She's like, what? She's like,

this fucking comedian on stage is goddamn homophobic. He's talking about me. And it was when I was doing my closer. And like that closer was at that time was literally about how ridiculous it was that gay people and transgender people weren't allowed in the army. Literally all he saw was me doing an impression of a redneck talking about gays in the military. And he was drunk and was like,

that's what this guy. which I don't even like, God damn, how long, that's my closer. How long had he been there? He was just drunk and stupid. You're right, Derry. You just can't worry about stupid people. Well, I'll say two things.

Thank you. For saying I was right. I'll say two things. We can get up our own asses a little bit about comedy, but this really is how subtle it can be, where you can, two comedians doing the same trick and saying the same thing, but the way they set up the premise,

or maybe how they end it really is all the difference in the meaning or the point they're trying to get across if they're trying to get one across. We are doing the same trick as Jeff Dunham. It's just that I think our goals are different. And that's why. And I think that's why it's important to like take jokes in context, give comedians a little bit of breathing room when they're trying to craft them. You know what I mean? Don't just run with the first fucking story. But on the flip side, it's also like we do be making.

points. And sometimes you can tell what a comedian's point is. Yeah. If you have a problem with it, it's okay to say that you have a problem with that point. For sure. For sure. Yeah, yeah, for sure. But like, there's been plenty of times where if you, all of us, if you took a whole joke, five minute joke and you just clipped out 10 seconds of it and that's all you shared. Everybody would be like, that ain't. What? Well, the other thing I was going to say is I've been doing shows with DJ, but I've also just been doing house shows. And I've been, so I've been doing shows in front of a lot of people who don't know who I am. And I have a joke right now about my dad,

uh, considering beating the fuck out of a gay man because he gave my nephew beer, like in an attempt to groom him. Nice. And it is touch and go to discuss that with people who don't know me. Whereas DJ and I shows, they know me. Yeah, yeah, right.

Like they're fucking pumped from the moment. You know, they, they know that it's not going anywhere dangerous. so their tension is lower, and then I can break whatever tension I build. Whereas with the strangers, I've got to break the tension that is just there immediately when I start talking about my redneck dad beating up a gay man. Yeah.

Yeah, I used to have a joke about how, no matter how woke you are, you always get a little nervous when you're about to shake a black dude's hand because you don't know, like, you don't know if you're supposed to be cool or if you're supposed to be like, no, just shake it like you would shake your white friend's hand. and like I do felt like it was always a completely different reaction if I did it at a show that nobody knew who I was.

And if I did it at a show who it was our crowd, you know what I mean? Because they, like you said, there's that built-in grace. They're like, we know this man's heart. I think he's trying to go somewhere. You know what I mean? But like when you said it was like, I get nervous from I'm about to shake a black man's hand. Like that can be a little aggressive. Yeah.

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I love, I don't know why I get, I love doing ad reads. I turn into this like old, my dad's got an old radio buddy and I just immediately turned into him and start fantasizing about that life. I love it. You got a radio buddy personality with a beyond radio talent. I mean that as a compliment. No, thank you. You have a very radio personality.

Yeah, yeah. We're too talented to do it in this day and age. Trey, I want to say a great job on the read, and I really appreciated what I would call a Drew moment in which you said, they can kiss your ass. And that's what I love about Lucy. And I feel like that should be their new tagline. They can kiss your ass.

They can kiss your ass. Yeah, look into it, Lucy. I had a couple of, I had a couple of random things as I want to do. I want to ask you about it. I don't know how many we'll get through. But the first one is, I hope people find this interesting in this era of true crime. You know, my wife loves all that, all that murder stuff. This is because of a false crime, a fictional murder show we watched.

It made me curious about the answer to this question. And I wanted to ask Drew, who's a lawyer, Drew? You never give me any time with this. And then when I'm wrong later, you're like, are you better talk about Marra Beastown? Are you talking about Mary Beastown? No, no, no, no. Okay. I was about to say because I'm only on episode five.

No, no, no. I'm not going to say the name of the show because I don't want to spoil anything. People who've seen it will probably know what I'm talking about, but I'm not even going to say it. That way it don't count as a spoiler. Hypothetically, Drew, if, let's say, let's say I walked into the house and some dude was like assaulting Katie. Okay.

And I killed him. Yeah. Right. But then we immediately? Yeah. Just, yeah. just stabbed him or hit him with something just like to get it. Hey man, I'm doing something.

But he died. But then we freaked out over some kind of mitigating circuit. I don't know. Like he, Katie, let the dude into the house for fucking, because he had a quilt she wanted or some shit. I don't know what, but something makes it seem more complicated to us. So we freak out about it and panic and hide this dude's body. Yeah. Okay.

Not a good move. No, for sure it's not a good move. I always wonder why people did that. For sure, it's not a good move. But how does that play out later on when we get caught? If you get charged? Yeah, we get caught and it's like, yeah, we're charged and everything. And it really was self-defense.

And I know part of this answer is like, well, you've got to be able to prove that. Let's say we could maybe prove that, but we did still hide the body. Like, how's that all shake out? I would assume, I've never had this particular type of thing. I would assume there are statutes in most states. where hiding a body in that scenario is in and of itself illegal, whether it be an evidence tampering type thing, even if no crime was committed.

What potentially, but you would argue, obstruction of justice, justice, requires the choir crime, right. Right. But, I mean, like, even if your grandma just dies, I don't think you can just bury her. You know what I mean? Like, that's probably against some law.

Yeah, best of say, that's your Amish. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, now if you're Amish, you feel, or she stank. in self-defense, like you stabbed him with a fucking, you know, corncob stalk. I don't know. But so the way it would play out is you're arguing self-defense. The prosecution would argue on its face, you hiding the body is a good indicator

that it was not self-defense. If your lawyer did a good enough job of convincing the jury, no, he freaked out. That would just be up to the jury. The jury could decide that you had in the body was not indicative that you actually plan this or anything bad and still go with you. separately there is probably a crime you could be charged with in most states. I've never had that, so I don't know what it would be. But like I said,

I have to assume that simply not reporting a dead body is in and of itself a crime. But it might be a misdemeanor, and it's certainly much lower than fucking murder. Yeah, I mean, if I'm the judge, I'm the prison crime, like if you got off with the murder part, but still that other thing was a crime, are we talking like a prison crime or like, you know,

Well, it would depend on your record. Yeah. How the prosecutor feels about losing that case. And probably how the judge feels. So in every state I'm aware of, maybe there might be some exceptions. The jury finds you guilty or not guilty. The judge sentences you. So it probably depends on the press the thing guy.

It probably depends on whether the judge thought, man, is bullshit. They murdered this guy for his quilt. It's a nice quilt. I get it. But I'm going to give it. the book because every crime for the most part like every actual crime not that's not just like a civil you know ticket like smoking a cigarette in public or something can have jail time associated with it like that's in almost every sentencing guideline it can be anything from a warning you know

for for a lower crime all the way up to you know 365 days in jail for a misdemeanor that's how it is in tennessee so you could definitely still go to jail it would that would depend on the judge and the prosecutor. That would just blow my mind. Because I know that the world don't work even a little bit, how it does in my fucking little fairy talehead. But like, to me, it's like if you get off, like if everybody, if they prove like it was self-defense,

then after that it's like, yeah, and then they freaked out because they had just had to kill a person. Like, kind of just like let it go. You know what I mean? Like, if you didn't have a record. Yeah. And the prosecutor was very much like, I had to try this man because the facts run clear,

but I believe in juries, okay, then that prosecutor might even suggest to the judge probation or whatever for that other crime. You know, those reasonable prosecutors that exist one out of a hundred times. Right, right. It's like, to me, it's like if you kill a motherfucker, like truly in self-defense, like I say for the next 10 hours, you should be able to do whatever you want with that body.

You know what I mean? I agree. You've earned it. That should be, like I say, it probably is in Texas. I think it's 24. Yeah. Well, and on that note, if it made headlines and it was like Florida, stand your ground, and that's what it was all about.

Oh, you'd be fine in Florida. Right. The prosecutor might lick his or her wounds and you not even worry about that. I just, I don't know. Yeah. What this person looked like that you shot? Yeah. Right.

Also, your record or lack thereof would have a huge effect on that. Because at trial, they're not allowed to bring that up, but at sentencing, they fucking open and close with it. Damn. Right. Well, I was, again, it was the show I was watching, and it was a totally, in my opinion, completely justifiable homicide in self-defense. But then they freaked out and hid the body. And then so because of that, they never even, like when they got caught and shit, they weren't even trying to go for self-defense, you know? And like, it was, it kept pissing me.

Like, as a viewer of the show, I was like, Katie was getting sick of me because I was like, what the fuck are they do? Like, it was in self-defense. are they not even bringing that? And they like pretty much never actually attempted to make that defense. And I was like, maybe it's because they just know it looks so bad. There's no way they're going to get away. But it was just pissing me off from like a storytelling perspective. What did they say?

What did they ask the question, you know? Did they present a different defense? Like, we just didn't do it. There was overwhelming evidence. It seemed like that they had done it. But they tried to just go with not guilty. It wasn't us. I guess I could.

I guess I could see. a lawyer deciding that that would be easier to win than self-defense in a particular case. Maybe not in your show's case. You know what I mean? Yeah. It was anyway. That's why I was just curious because I don't know a lot of murder stuff, you know. Unfortunately, I know quite a bit.

Yeah, you're pretty, you're right up with murder stuff. Well, I was just thinking about how in my brother's case, there was a particular defense we could have gone for that Dustin just didn't want to because of what he was going to have to say on a stand and admit to and cop to in terms of the guy he killed abusing him and just like talking about that. But that wouldn't really apply in your case from your show trade. I'm just thinking of that because it's like there's a million reasons not to make the argument that other people think you should make.

You know, some lawyers overthink it though. They get too cute and they fuck up. that like a like that's a lawyer like you said you get into cute i'm trying to think of an example like they're up there trying to trying to hit instead of actually do their job like trying to make a name for themselves be cutesy like uh establish their brand and because of such they end up burying an actual win for themselves that's a pretty perfect analogy if what i'm interpreting you meaning is when they get up there and they're like you know they're have a good act, but then they open with some kind of crowdwork and they talk about like,

you can't even joke about anything anymore, but they don't have a punchline for that. They're just trying to get the crowd to agree with them. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's the thing. Man, that's wild. Because I've been watching, I keep seeing some fucking, like, in court shows now. I'm a lot more, ever since me and, you know, when me and you met and then the more I talk to you about law, the more I actually pay attention to that shit.

And like, I've heard Drew say some shit, like, I don't think that'd be real. And I hear him and all of a sudden, you know, they'll just be like a, the lawyer would just be saying some shit and the judge will be like, I don't know about that. You know, say that in a different way. And he's like, okay, I'm like, God damn, like, how, it's so goddamn hard for y'all to do your goddamn job when you can't just fucking go off.

Like, you know what I mean? Like, sometimes you just want to fucking go off. Well, yeah, you can't testify. Yeah, yeah. You just want to be hard for you. What happened? Well, you know, I got pretty good at hiding. You know what I mean?

You got to put it in the opening in the clothing. Right. All right. So one of the other random things I want to tell y'all about because I just thought this was so wild. Uh, fucking smart Mark spoiled this in the group text, but I'm still going to go into it. I saw y'all complaining about the spoil and didn't go read what he spoiled.

He had literally no way of knowing. Also, I didn't go read it though. Me and Mark, when we were reading this at the exact same time, which is so absurd when I, when everybody finds out what it is I'm talking about? Because it's just like, what are the odds that we were reading the same thing at the same time? It was wild. But I want to make sure you heard me. This is all new to me.

I saw the complaints. and didn't scroll up. So Domino's pizza has brought back the noid. Do y'all even, do y'all remember the noise? He was in a game, right? That's the main reason I remember him. I remember him from that because me and my granny. We had in the video store.

Oh, he was also, though, if I'm not mistaken. And I didn't read that. I also did what Drew did. Like I saw what you were talking about. And I'm like, I'm not going to deep dive or anything. I think I remember. And I could be wrong. I thought that he was on some sort of like,

game like on the game show network because me and my granny used to watch that shit all the time and maybe that was it you know what i think i'm thinking about the movies wasn't he like a meme basically like like like the equivalent of a meme back then he was in a few different places he popped up a lot it was it was 80s corporate marketing shit yeah yeah cross promoting putting them all over it was a domino's like not spokesperson but like a domino's ag campaign that's yeah avoid the noid because it's like the noid is this little like humanoid grimlin thing. Like he looks like a

Dumanoid. There you go. Right. I remember that. I do remember that. A humanoid grimlin thing in a skin tight, bunny-eared body suit. I don't remember the bunny ears.

He has bunny ears. And it's unclear. It's like, are those his ears and the suit goes over them? Or does the suit have ears? It's so weird. This is for Domino's pizza commercials. And what the noid is,

or was, but they've brought him back. That's why I was looking into him. Domino's has just brought him back. But he is the physical manifestation of all the obstacles to delivering a pizza in 30 minutes or less. Again, Coke to a rabbit boardroom where they come up with this wild-ass shit. But so, you know, 30 minutes or less or it's free. That was the big Donno. It kind of does sound like something a pizza delivery man did come up with.

Like just so, you know, that when they're out delivering their pizza, Did you avoid the noid tonight? They were saying the void, but they, but nobody, they misunderstood them because they were on code. That's what it was. That was the catchphrase, avoid the noid. And the noid would like try to sabotage any attempt to deliver a pizza in 30 minutes or less.

And these intrepid delivery drivers had to avoid the noid and able to, you know, complete their mission successful and deliver the pizza. That was the whole concept of it. It's weird as hell to think about. They've since brought him back, which is what got me looking it up. And it's like everything I've said about the noid is wild. Yeah. But then I read this part.

Like I don't remember this at all. And it's just like everything surrounding this character is so fucking weird. So on January 30th, 1989, Kenneth Lamar noid, a mentally ill man. Kenneth Lamar. Kenneth Lamar. That's like if my uncle rapped. Kenny Lamar. To hold a butterfly knife.

Kenneth Lamar Noid, a mentally ill man who thought the ag campaign was a personal attack on himself, right? Entered a Domino's restaurant in Shambly, Georgia. Do you know where that is, Corey? Shambly. I actually don't. Rainbow Pops there one summer or something. No. You're mean to tell me you ain't never fucked a huddle house waitress there.

Right. You've got me. I don't know. You mean to tell me, you ain't ever had a threesome in Shambly with a girl. same champagne. It's in northern DeKalb County. One person here is more surprised than both of y'all that I've never

fuck somebody in Shambly, Georgia. DeKalb County, isn't that a prominent county? Yeah, I know where to, I know what DeKalb County. Well, Shamblay's in the northern part of the cab county anyway. Oh, the northern part of the cap. Kenner of all you ever been to the south. Entered a Domino's restaurant in Shambly, Chambly, Georgia, armed with a

357 Magnum. What? Word, that's a big one. And held two employees hostage for over five hours. After telling the employees that Domino's owner Tom Monaghan had stolen his name, he forced them to call Domino's headquarters and demand $100,000 and a white limousine as getaway transportation. After offering to exchange one hostage for a copy of the Widows' Son, which is a novel by Robert Anton Wilson,

about fucking, let's say, it's, uh, the plot concerns the adventures of yacht and an answer. Oh my God. This is, it's an Illuminatus trilogy type thing. What is it with these motherfuckers? Constantly fighting to, yeah. Is this guy cute? Is Noid Q?

It sounds. I thought you said cute at first. So he offered to exchange one of his only two hostages for this wild-ass book, right? And then Noid reneged on his offer. offer after a police officer brought him the book. Noid eventually became hungry and forced the employees to make him two special pizzas. While Noid ate the pizzas with the gun in his lap, the hostages escaped. Noid surrendered to the police shortly after two shots were fired by Noid during the incident. Noid was charged with kidnapping, aggravated assault, extortion, and

possession of a firearm during a crime. He was found not guilty by reason of insanity. Yeah. Noid spent time in institution but died by suicide on February 23rd, 1995. This incident has been insinuated to have caused Domino's pizza to discontinue advertising using the Noid as their mascot, though this has been rejected by the company and advertisers. After the incident, police chief Reid Miller told reporters he was just paranoid. This man has held the hostages shot, fucking fired shots, tried to kill. kill people, lost his mind, and the fucking police chief shows up with his bathroom, bathrobe on, I presume, in Chambley, Georgia, and makes a pun to the press. He just couldn't help it.

He cited on the way over there. He couldn't help it. Once in a lifetime, dude. Hey, so, Chambly, I did look it up. Chambly has been referred to as Shambodia with racist connotations due to its high Asian population And the concentration ever check out right there. Due to its high Asian population and the concentration of Asian restaurants along Beaufort Highway, a chapter of Tom Wolfe's novel, A Man in Full, is titled Shambodia. That is a classic.

That's a classic racist redneck move right there. Absolutely. Like a country that has those people in it, you know what I mean? Yeah. Mamprica or whatever. That's a thing. Yeah, Memphis. People call it.

I'm a racist called in Africa, which I can do that barely even, I know that barely even works. Shambodia is way better. Yeah, right. Like at least you're like, okay. Yeah, I get it. But yeah, it's just one of their moods. I'm such a piece of shit. I'm sitting here trying to think of like better racist things for Memphis.

Like my brain is going 90 miles an hour. Like, I can do this one better. That reminds me of the opening of our Comedy Central sketch accent problems that they cut it down to one line. But in the beginning we were trying to help that racist that we were into in the bar workshop. his jokes. Pete. What's the one that made the cut?

Was the one that made the cut, hey, I didn't even get to tell you the one about how Puerto Ricans can't tap dance. That was at the end. And our boy ad libbed that one. In the beginning, we were workshop and stuff, but we just went with our reaction about Jews not having wings. The dumbest one I can remember was I can remember people calling Marda,

the Metro Atlanta rail, whatever, moving Africans rapidly through Atlanta. And what I remember about it was how clever everyone thought they were like, that was like, A, you didn't think of it, and B, that's dumb. The least clever one that I ever heard was here in Chattanooga, the rap station is called Power 94, but they call it, blank 94. Yeah. So that's,

you know, that's the number one move right there. Right. Just plug it in the N-word in front of whatever the actual name is. No. Yeah. No, no creativity whatsoever. At all.

I thought it was going to be white power. No, that'd be good, you know. I'm an idiot. No, no, but. I'm an idiot for giving them credit. No, dude, don't ever, don't ever give them credit.

Yeah. Speaking of accent problems, I think it's fine to announce here at the end of the show that we haven't done them yet, don't know where they're coming, but hey, y'all can expect some more comedy central sketches from us. We're slated to film two more here this summer. Super Pump to do it. Super Pump to just feels like everything's, uh, I don't know.

I mean, certainly it's not like it, the blip in Marvel because all that shit did happen and we still have to live with the consequences and obviously it was terrible. But I thought, you know, I'm starting to feel like, all right, we're getting shit back together. We're going back on the road. Things are starting to open back up. People are getting vaccinated. I'm starting to, like, kind of shake it off. I don't know about you guys.

Yeah, I mean, I don't feel the same way. What I think is like people, some people kept having working in our industry, like having shit going on even during the pandemic. But that was like, you know, that was like super hitters. It was real hitters. And now that things are going back to normal, they're like, hey, we can get some of those kind of not hitters back in here. Hit adjacent.

We can get down to the hit adjacent people like the well red boys. And I'm fine. We're here. We're here. We're still here. Welcome back. Yeah. I'm just,

I have 100% agree with y'all, and I'm just giving you hell. But for a second there, Corey, it very much started to read like, look, man, you know, it's so,

like, I don't know how y'all feel about it. And it's like somebody's out there like, yeah, well, I lost both grandparents. No, I know,

man, I know, and I'm not, I'm glad you got your sketches back. No, I know, I hear you, dude.

And like, I always like, it's so it, that I find it difficult to even talk about it, period, because it's like, you know, I can't, I'm not ever going to act like, uh, shit was,

shit wasn't bad for me. I mean, like, shit was bad for the world. I live in the world. Therefore, shit was bad for me. But like, it would be disingenuous for me to be like, yeah, I mean, I had a pretty good 2020. I feel guilty about that. Um, and I know that other people were suffering.

But like that aside, you know, we still, regardless of how many people have suffered, we need like hope is still a good thing regardless. Uh, well, we got to get back to work. Other people got to get back to work. You know, that's the same. like I don't want to overlook the death, but that's the thing that concerns me. It concerns me thinking about the future for everybody

and people I care about is like, the economy's going to be a lot slower starting to be completely back up than it was, you know, on the crash side. The crash went like that. The startup's going to go, you know, and all you motherfuckers out there are refusing to go to work for less than $15 hour.

Keep that shit up. Absolutely. For sure. For sure, man. Yeah, man. I mean, dude, like, I drive around, I've been, you know, I've been at the beach the past couple weeks and like every goddamn, I drive by a fast food restaurant, it's like, you know, okay, how about 12? You know, like each sign. And then like I drive by it like two days later.

And it's like 15 and a hand job. You know what I mean? Like, we'll do anything. So like, and that's, that's evident. Like, you cannot interpret that any other way than it's working. You know what I mean? There's literally no other way to interpret that. And also, this is.

cliche, but I don't know any other point to be made. They didn't replace you with robots. Like they said they were going to. They can't do it. They don't. Yeah, they don't. Right. Because robots are smart.

They'll start demanding unions and shit. Yeah. And you know who's going to figure out the fucking robot thing finally? This fucking generation, you old pieces of shit. I'm just kidding. We love y'all. And we thank y'all for coming to the shows. July 21st, right?

Atlanta. No. No. No. July. in Atlanta. It's doubly funny. It's like right behind you.

But it's like literally right beside your face as you're getting it wrong. You know what it is? In my brain, it was 2021. I saw the 21. July 10th, 20, I'll cut this part out. No, I want. July 10th, 2021, we're going to be in Atlanta. We're super glad to be in Atlanta.

By 23rd and 24th, we'll be in Birmingham, Alabama. No shit. Back in the South, baby. Let's just review real quick. And look, man, a lot of old people die, but God damn, I got to get back to work. Now, I'm listening. Fuck y'all.

We made robots. But I do, listen, come see me on the wrong date. God, damn. Yeah, yeah. It was a bad look. It was a bad look. I ain't going to lie. A lot of show experience, baby.

Sorry about that. I've had some caffeine. All righty. Well, do we hit it? Yeah. Oh, uh, thank you all for listening to the well-read show. We love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next week if you got nothing to do.

Thank you, God bless you. Good night and skew. I'll be playing that on the fucking keyboard next time. That's right, man. Skew. They're the... They're the... They're all rednecks.

They like cornbread, but sex, they care way too much, but don't give a fun. Next that makes some people upset, but they got three big old dicks that you can suck.