wellRED podcast - #227 - The NFL is Gay! (and other stuff)

Episode Date: June 30, 2021

This week the boys talk about The NFL being Gay now, how the past was wild, and also a little japanese wrasslin! We are going back on tour and you should get tickets right now at wellredcomedy.com !!!

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion, because you used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie. I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say.

Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main? Because that's the thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better.

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Premium features. I used Rocket Money and realized that I had apparently been paying for two different language learning services that I just wasn't using. So I was probably like, I should know Spanish. I'll learn Spanish. and I've just been paying to learn Spanish without practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that.

Also, a fun one, I'd said it before, but I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friend's faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball looking twin fellas.

Yeah, so that was money. What was that in response to? What was that a reply gift for? Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten.

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slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast. They're the they're the liberal rednecks day like cornbread but six they care way too much but don't give a fuck. They're the liberal rednecks that makes some people. upset but they got three big old dicks that you can sun. Well, here we are. Hey, Heidi fellers. Corey's got the dates up behind him. That hits.

As always, let's let you all know we're going back out on the road. If you didn't know already, you should have by now. But we're starting July 23rd and 24th in Birmingham, Alabama. We're very excited. A lot of other dates getting added all the time. The next one after that just got added like very recently. That's August 19th and through the 21st in Denver, Colorado. looking very forward to that.

So yeah, adding stuff all the time. Look for your city. We're sorry that things have been changing and whatnot. But again, it's like logistical nightmare out there. Yeah. Y'all got to keep in mind that like literally everyone is like going back on the road for the

right now at the same time and through the fall. And so like and venues, a lot of them have been closed this whole time and are having to reopen. And all like just all. It's like, I mean, it's, it's a mess.

But like not in a, you know, everybody's happy to be. We're so happy. Let you all know, like, just have, you know, please have some patience of shit like that happens because it's a lot of lunacy. Also, uh, wrangle all that. If you go to well red comedy.com, W-E-L-R-D comedy.com and you don't see your city, that does not mean that we're not coming there. On my Twitter, I shared a whole Google doc worth of cities that we're working on contracts and booking for.

And, and hey, if you don't see your city on there, that still don't mean we ain't working on something for it. Yeah. There's only so many weeks left in the year and there's so many cities and that, you know, yada, yada yada, but we're, and I'll tell you this, uh, I just look today because I was curious, that September show for Atlanta is, uh, almost sold out right now. And it's in September. Now, I'm not, you know, who knows, I'm not saying this 100% will happen, but we probably, there will probably be a second show added to that and I'm pretty pumped. Uh, so go sign up for the newsletter at well readcom.com. And you will be the first person to find out about it. Sincerely, I've said this before jokingly, but it's true. You'll find out before

my ass does. I guarantee you you'll find out where we're going to be before I do. If you just go to that newsletter. And yeah, man, selling out Atlanta, that makes me, that makes me halt tangle and my butthole, uh, do something. Vibrate. There you go. And if you want to see a picture of that, look really closely on the Google. Corey Drive. It's in the bottom right corner. He accidentally left it in there. And there's also his credit card number. All that. So go find that. I'm just, oh, God. That way I'm just, because I'm just, I don't even know what Google Drive document you're talking about. So I'm saying, I'm going, I wonder what.

that's from and it was a screenshot. Okay, good, good. It was a screenshot, but dude, you just made me work because I've done shit such stupid shit like that before. Like, I'll take a selfie in like some, you know, like a mirror in a hotel. Like, what up y'all? We're in, and somebody's, like, the first thing is like, dude, I can see your whole

credit card. Like, how old. You guys know who the pop smoke is? The rapper? The young rapper, yeah, I love him. The way he got killed was he posted something that had his address on and got robbed that night.

and murdered? Yeah. Jesus Christ. Oh, hit. No. It was only up to like 20 minutes is what I recall. You know, it was just screenshots, you know? Well, that's some, that ain't it.

Now I'm even more terrified. Well, he got robbed because he put up pictures of like the Cartier diamonds he bought that. Right, right. Which is not to say I'm getting up. I just mean, it ain't going to happen to you, Corey, unless that's what you're putting up, you know? No, I mean, I hear you, but there's plenty of people who still would just like to murder me without taking my things. You know what I mean? Like the things would just be gravy. They literally would be gravy. But Tray's great line. Oh, there is gravy here. But Tray's great line about whether or not we get hecklers is

no, they can call me, call us queers on the internet for free. They don't have to pay $25 for a ticket. Right. I think the motivation for his murder was not hate. It was greed. Right, right, right. And that's it. And what Trace said is very much true. And another thing that, God, we used to always talk about that this is what I'm so excited to be going back on tour. But now that we've started posting. and dates. I've started getting flashbacks about the little tiny things that I hated so much about how society be. And one of them is like, I can't tell you how many comments I've gotten on posting dates of people who were just like, y'all are actually going to tour the South. Oh, my God. Blubble, yeah, with Treya, that line, I'm like, I can't, don't go to Texas. Y'all might get

shot by a rodeo clown. And I'm having to, and like, I am responding to these because I think it's important. I'm just like, hey, guys, literally our best shows have and probably always will be in the south and they just don't believe it and it's just so frustrating that like five years into this touring endeavor people are still like i can't believe you're going to do north carolina what i yeah i didn't think about how you going viral we get to relive some of the new viral magic but we also have to relive a lot of the bulls and bullshit so much of the bullshit and then like yeah and i guess i i guess they're just trying to be funny and they don't know that i've seen that a thousand times. So it's not really, but like, Jesus, dude, I just don't see how people's brains work.

But yes, we're going to be touring the South. Hell, the first several dates are in the South and I can't fucking wait. There's like, there's kind of two different things, right? And I'm opposed very much to both of them, but one of them, I think is sillier than the other one, which is that like, because I mean, Alabama, I'm sure they got all kinds of horrific laws, but they haven't been one of the ones lately that are being like boycotted by liberals, right? Like, I feel like they've just, been boycotted in perpetuity. For sure. Right.

But I'm saying. The documentary industry cannot boycott them. They wouldn't have anything to make. Right. Right. But like Georgia, like sometimes with a liberal saying some shit like that, it's a boycotty type question. Right.

Yeah. That's true too. I'd be surprised by that stance considering we're liberals from the South. Like, of course we don't. See for us. But, but then there's also, um, the just more general like, wow, you guys are liberals and you tour through the south type of thing, which we also get a lot of. And that one is like even funnier to me because it's like there's clearly no real,

you're not actually thinking through that question whatsoever because is your assumption that 400, 500, whatever hardcore Republican rednecks are like fucking gussying up in their best cowboy boots and fucking paying $50 for them and their old lady to have and getting a babysitter to come see our queer asses. It makes enough sense. Like they're not there. Like, of course they're not there. So why would it be a problem?

And it's also part of that's like that's still lingering mentality of like, well, who does come then? Yeah. Because you're in Alabama. So there's no one else in Alabama other than those guys. It's almost like we don't know what your whole deal is. Right. Yeah, right. So it's never made sense in a humorous, but also kind of.

of annoying way. If you're one of these people when you listen to this, we still love you. It's just, yeah, you're... I don't think anybody listening to this, like, unless this is their first episode. I agree.

You know what I mean? Like, if this is their first episode, that's very possible. But like, if you've been here for a while, you have this, you probably have the same annoyance that we do with that type of shit. Because it's never a southerner

that says that. No, of course not. You know what I mean? Because they know. They wouldn't have a show to go to. Yeah, right. Exactly. Exactly.

And also, like, you pointed out before, like Bill Maher sells out huge theaters in Alabama. Like, what, you know, and he don't even have the luxury of, like, also being a Southerner. Right.

Like Trojan horse and his ass in there, you know? Yeah. Yeah. But, you know. Because, like, he's like, I'm not, but we are not getting into a whole fucking Bill Maher thing. Of course not. That's not what I intended.

Like, on that particular subject, and this is an objective fact, I bet you could find a lot of clips from his shows of him doing this. Like, what you just said, he also has said that himself. Right. You know, like, but he still gets the same shit. He still gets that same shit after years and years of that,

even though he has publicly said the same thing a million times. Right. And it doesn't matter. Like it's still surprising to people every time or whatever. It's just that it's just that it's a symptom of the people needing so desperately for the South to be the one and only shitty place so that they can absolve themselves of ever having to work on anything in their community when they live in Oregon or California or Seattle, you know, the Washington area.

They're, oh, no, it's just there. And that's all, I mean, that's all that is. And I get it. I sort of wish we had something to download all our bullshit on, I guess. Yeah, I don't know, baby. I don't either. I have, I mean, go ahead. No, I'm just going to say, you know, we could.

There are people in the South who do have a group for sure. download their entire bullshit. Absolutely. That's sort of like we're against that. Take your pick. That's kind of the point. Don't lose that. Right, right, right.

Except we can't, you know, we'd be doing that. These people, but in reverse, you know, we kind of get down with sometimes. Meaning like coastal, the whole, it's like, you know. Yeah. It's literally, I mean, it, we've talked about this before and it's also obvious, but it's literally exact same thing, but in reverse. Do you know what I mean? Where it's like they think, you know, my mom thinks you're going to get fucked in your

butt and also stabbed to bed in California. Do you know what? That's my favorite Toby Keystone. Yeah. The order of that really matters a lot. A lot. Yeah. Changes the whole year of the crime.

Shout out freaky tiki. Bobby sent me and DJ some of these shirts. We're going to give them away at our, we're doing a charity show in Grace in Kentucky. You can check out all the details on my Twitter. But I just wanted to say thank you for this shirt. I love it. I said it looked like a gay buffalo. I don't know if they like that or not, but it does to me.

The Buffalo's? Bobby's a day Bobby's a day Oh, okay Buffaloes were pissed I don't know if you've met any of them But They hate the gays

That's why they stay in Colorado Football's gay now boys Yeah I didn't watch that The thing you're talking about NFL put out I didn't watch it either I didn't watch it either

but I've been enjoying from both sides everything that's been going on. The fucking NFL, like, just... The audacity. Yeah, right. And they stay doing that. Like, of course, it's like all that,

all that pink shit they have for breast cancer awareness. Of course, nobody's pro breast cancer. But like, that's so they can sell pink jerseys. Of course, yeah, yeah. Like, that's the only reason they do. They don't give a fuck. They don't give a fuck about anything. And it's the same thing with them being gay now.

They try Carl Massive. So, all right. People long-time listeners know that because growing up, my older first cousin was a drug addict and a felon, he was a huge Raiders fan. So I am also a Raiders fan in addition to loving the Titans. And you're queer. So this works out a lot. Right. Yeah, exactly.

A lot of, hitting a lot of, checking a lot of boxes this story does for me. Carl Nassib was a defensive end for the Raiders and he came out as gay and he got almost universal support, which I think even five years ago, that's Michael Sam. Yeah, right. Wouldn't have been the same deal. So that's great. That's awesome. then his jersey became the number one selling jersey in the NFL for like a week straight or something like that because a lot of gay people were buying it and everything because he's he's their guy or whatever right and i'm just

saying i didn't know that yeah that way and i'm saying then the NFL after that comes out with football is gay now like dude it's so they can start selling fucking rainbow NFL gear or whatever like they don't give a fuck of course they don't it's better than them this is that thing we've talked about so many times it's like these corporations are full of shit, but like it's, it's better than them like being the opposite. Right, where they're like, oh, we better not touch this one. So like, what do you do? Because that is what they used to used to. They would have been like, this is too polarizing of a thing for us to touch.

But now they're like, hey, we assume bottom line wise that the world is actually becoming a more decent place and we can profit from this, which again is sickening, but it's sickening and it's airing in the right direction. You know what I mean? Well, it's a symptom of progress. What is so frustrating is when people start trying to get the symptoms of progress to happen instead of actual progress, case in point, this Toyota stuff, it's like we're going to boycott Toyota because Toyota has donated money to the senators who won't certify the election. And it's like, obviously, I don't want Toyota to do that. But Toyota doing that is just what corporations do.

I was about to ask the question. This is the question I've had my head ever since that, ever since I first saw that that was going on. because it's like it's like a total of $55,000 to like whatever, 30 different Congress people. I think it was an average. Am I wrong? Either way, a corporation that large, I'm just saying my first thought when I saw it was, and maybe this isn't true, but I was like, is that not like totally standard for them? Like for any corporation that's, did they not also donate to like some Democratic campaigns or whatever? Because like they're a huge operation.

I just assume they did. They literally grease all the wheels. they can. And don't they all do that all the time? So what makes Toyota any fucking different? They were number one on the, so there were, I think, six senators who did not vote to certify the election, which is on its face not agreeing with democracy being legitimate, you know? And so of those six, they looked at who donated as far as corporations go. I think Toyota averaged the highest amount. I think it was a 55K average. average. But like the other ones were 20. You know what I mean? H.T and T was on it. You know, throw your cell phone out of the window. Put it in your Toyota and running off a cliff, I guess. Yeah. My only point was that is not that you should be for Toyota doing that. Of course not.

Pining for Toyota to do better, quote unquote, is just cheering for a symptom. You know, cheering for Nike saying we like Cabinac is cheering for a symptom. The progress will come and then those assholes will have to follow. But I don't know. I could have just looked any of this up and I of course haven't. I haven't done anything at all. Right. But like is it a thing where the senator,

the Congress people in question also happen to be in districts or states or whatever where Toyota has some kind of vested interest in their operations or something like that? So you know what I mean? Where it's like it's correlation, it's not causation. It has nothing to do with how they feel about the fucking those events. It's because they need them for something. else for geographical reasons or something like that. I know I know you mean like is it Detroit or a place Toyota has a plant or whatever,

but Toyota is big enough that any district would probably, arguably, Toyota have a vested interest. But I can say this with 100% sureness. It had nothing to do with the election. It had nothing to do. Which is a lot of people's point is like you don't even look into it. You don't care. That is true.

We should hate that. But we're picking and choosing when the cheer and class. you know, Nike did good. Nike did horrible. Nike has also bought, you know, legislation and legislators in order to not pay their workers fair wages or continue to use, you know, Chinese children to make their shoes. It's just...

It's not possible. They're the enemy, bro. Like being truly moral or ethical in that way is not possible in a society as consumerist as ours is. Of course not. Of course not, dude. And also like... The hippie-dippy motherfucker out there probably has an iPhone. Of course.

Because that's all everybody has. Right. Yeah. And even if he don't, it's not like the people that made his Android or good people either. And also, like, for the most part, like, if you really are someone who's like, you know what, goddamn, and I'm not going to use anything from any corporation ever. I'm going to go strictly mom and pop and I'm going to go strictly organic and blah, blah, some motherfuckers literally can't afford to do that shit.

Like some people like not only need the luxury and the convenience of a Walmart, but like, that's the process that can afford. You know what I'm saying? Unless you're buying it from like literal primary source. artisans or something who make it in their their shed, whatever that is. You're still going to run into like these same supply chain factors. You know what I mean? Like when it comes to

food or whatever, it's like, you know, I don't fuck with chicken away, but I hate it. And for the record. But if I get a chicken sandwich or somewhere else, I guarantee you they'd do some fucked up shit to them chickens. Of course. Of course they do. Whatever. Like, well, it's just, it's always something. Always. I want to, I want to say first of all, you guys are really for me. But I want to parse something out too.

there's a huge difference. You guys are talking about the inability for us to consume things completely ethically. That's 100% true. It is impossible. But I don't want anyone to think you guys or anyone listening that I or we are trying to let Toyota off the hood. My point is simply that the ability for corporations to buy legislation to donate this

amount of money is the problem. That's the problem. The fact that they can do that and control it's like, oh, you didn't give your, you didn't buy the right senator. no, we're playing the wrong game if we're standing up going, buy the right, Senator. Well, let's stop it from buying the senators.

Well, that's, yeah, that's true too. And I don't give a fuck. Dude, here's the thing, you ain't wrong if you boycott them. That's fine, dude. That's awesome. Like, you're totally allowed to do that. Everybody that boycotted Chick-fil-A, they're totally allowed to do that. That's fine.

My problem comes with, like, I know there's going to be some people just start screaming at people in a tundre right now. You know, just, God damn, how can you realize what you're driving? Because I've seen some, I've seen like several people in my time. timeline that we're like, I'm selling my Tacoma and getting a blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, but you already got it. You don't have to go through all that. And the turning ratio on a turnger is real tight.

I don't recommend screaming at one from very close. They will run you over. You know what else is funny about that? Toyota was about to sell so many trucks, too, is really what it's built down to. And I was about to say, and what Chick-fil-A did. It's like ended a long time ago, but that's exactly what I was about to bring up. I don't know that it ended. But it's funny also to think about like it's liberals now are pissed off at Toyota and boycotting them

when like for so long it was. was the exact opposite. Oh, yeah. It was like, you know, the fucking rednecks of the world was like, you know, buy American, fuck them Japanese cars. Don't you, you're really going to drive a Japanese piece of shit, support this. Yeah. Like, you know, fucking, that was a huge thing.

The hatred for the Japanese auto. The NFL is gay and the Prius is American. This is a fucking amazing thing. That's fucking wild to think about. Yeah. Culture wars, man. That's, but again, no. Corporations always win the culture wars.

That's the lesson. Back to the NFL thing. just for briefly a minute. The reason that I can get behind it, even though it is all just like fucking completely shallow or whatever, this is one of them where it's like, well, it's pissing off the right people too.

So I can, like, I can't wait to sit back. Like, I hope all the fucking teams start wearing rainbow uniforms. Just because of how hilarious, you know, parlor will be.

Yeah, I agree with that completely. I just like, the NFL, like, I'm a huge professional football fan. Me too. I have been for years.

But the NFL as an organization has always just really pissed me. y'all yeah they don't you know and it's like that's you know fairly well the irony there because i hate them but i watch the shit out of their product they're the only ones that do it what are you gonna do i know yeah the irony there is a lot of the real hardcore culture warrior right wingers already wrote the NFL off right because even though they got rid of Kaepernick they didn't get rid of uh man i'm forgetting his name uh tame tevo neeling there was the one main guy the safety who was early on with cap

see culture war one guy got famous the other dude there was a guy who was kneeling at the same time as cappernick who stayed in the league was sitting down that whole time and no one ever gave his shit right because he hit two or rad i guess so i know that like some of my in-laws and a lot of people stopped watching the NFL already and they bought they brought up they were reading the transcript of that commercial in front of me and i was trying to remain quiet because i just wanted you know i feel like an observer you know what i mean what was your uh joke try I was trying to Jane Goodall him a little bit. You know, it's like, let's see.

But it became very clear as they read it that they would read a line and look. They were waiting on me to react. So I was like, yeah, I don't. If you guys think we want that, we don't. Nobody wants this. Yeah. And my brother-in-law was like, I want to know what happened in the room where that was pitched. And some guy's job was to approve or disapprove it.

And he was like, yeah, let's go with that. I don't know y'all's theory. My theory is it was an old dude in a suit. who literally was like, this is what gay people want, right? So, yeah, run that. Like, just, good, that's what they want. Cool.

Yeah, I mean, I don't, I don't know that there's that much thought. I'm just, I'm saying, I think they view it as like a brand new, untapped market. Right. The gay market. And this is how you do it. Based on those jersey sales and everything, they saw and they had dollar signs in their eyes and now here we are.

For sure. I'm such a cynic where the NFL is concerned. That's just my son. Yeah, but you should be. You're right. What I'm saying is, it's hilarious that that's what they came up with. Yeah. And they're right.

What I'm saying is that is an unsight mark. Liberals are, we are just as prone to wear jerseys and cheer for the right team and blah, blah, blah. So smear the queer is back. That was the other comment. That was the other comment that was made. But I don't know what I was going to say. They're doing it wrong. There's absolutely a market for, you know, gay NFL fans.

The NFL's right about that. This was a bad way to do it. They could have done a better way. Yeah. I mean, and there's two ways, too. It's like, part of me is like, just don't say shit and just be like, yeah, cool, this happened. He's gay.

We don't care. But then I'm like, I don't know. It is a big deal. There is like, there is like sort of a line. You want to acknowledge it so that everybody knows like, hey, this, before this, no one was comfortable coming out. Like, don't, please don't think for a second that he's the first gay NFL player. You know what I mean?

He's the first dude that was. like society has finally come to a point where I feel like I can say this and nobody's going to fucking choke me out in the locker room and everybody's going to look the other way. Just so people know that don't follow the NFL because he was not a star before this or a well-known name. Carl Nassiz has been in the league for like he's not a rookie. He's been in the league for like six years, six, seven years, something like that. My point being like it took him a while too is what I'm saying. Like you're like first of all, we know for a fact they're gay players in the NFL. there's been people that came out after the fact,

so we know that they existed. Statistically, of course, they existed. But I'm saying Carl Nassib, he wasn't comfortable doing it necessarily when he was first coming up, you know, five, six years ago or whatever. But now he is. Do you think he's going to have locker room problems? I mean, I hope not. Everybody that said anything about it on the Raiders,

John Gruden, Mark Davis, and everybody has been said all the right things. You know, I'm sure there's some dumbasses on the Raiders, not saying much. Richie Incognito's on the Raiders. he was the one. No, what? Yeah, buddy. Robbie said he gives 50 to one odds that him and Richie Incognito end up getting married.

Yeah, Richie Incognito, this is getting too in the weeds, but Richie Incognito says he did all that wild. For people don't know. He was in Florida. He was like bullying and stuff and it was homophobic bullying, calling people fags and stuff like that. Like hardcore. He did a lot crazier shit than that. His dad died and he broke in his dad's funeral and was trying to like cut his dad's head off

to save as a souvenir because he was in so much grief or whatever. something like that. He was a wild, like, yeah, literally. Ritchie Incognito, so, you know, naturally Raiders had to get him there. Like, we got to. But, hey, he's a real good ball player. He's a hell of a guard. Can he play? God damn it. And I know it's like, here's such a fan comment. Richie, that linebacker's got your dad's skull. Go get it. It's true. And I mean this from a different perspective, from a mental health perspective, Richie Incognito was forced to start taking therapy all those years

ago and all that shit happened. And since he got into therapy, Richie Incognito has been a model citizen and hasn't done any of that shit. So I'm just saying that's a testament to the efficacy of therapy. So I don't think he will fuck with Carl Nassib, although he probably would have five or six years ago. I also want to say, and then I'll shut the fuck up about the Raiders. Because Carl Nassad,

he was on the Browns and then the Bucks. He could be on any team. And all of this still would have happened. Still, I just want to say, because we have nothing else to brag about. The Raiders suck so much, that the Raiders historically are arguably the most progressive organization

in the NFL. and that goes back like 50 years. They had the first Hispanic quarterback, first Hispanic coach, first black head coach, first female front office executive, the CEO of the Raiders was a woman for years and years, Amy Trask, and now the first openly active gay player.

They got a long track record. Black punter too. You don't ever see that? They had that. That's right. Al Davis was a wild motherfucker. They also give people who want to cut their dads heads off second chances. That's right.

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This is something. Hits. And if you're wondering, I should add, they got hard firms. They got all that, all the standard stuff you look for. All right. we've been talking about the issues and stuff which hits but i mean i've got some silly shit i wouldn't mind bringing up if y'all okay my phone's nine i got to plug it in so i just want to apologize to everyone if my sound sounds different i got to unplug these headphones yeah do your thing buddy buddy baby chow yes tray

wrestling guy buttercream dream i know you told me before that there's a huge wrestling wrestling culture and everything in Japan. Like, do you know a lot about that? Because if you do, I want to ask you about something. I don't know a shit ton of it. I mean, I definitely know more than the average person. And I've watched some New Japan stuff. And I do know that it can get probably.

Well, pretty wild. Like, there's so many people like, like they'll see like an American match now. And they're like, man, there's too much silly stuff going on now. Yeah. You know, it used to be baga-da-da. I'm like, man, I hear you. Don't get me wrong, but like, because most of the silly stuff in America,

here's where it comes from, dudes that worked in Japan for five years and then came back to America and like, this is what we were doing over there because there is some just straight up fucking, like, motherfucker, what? I saw a clip on Reddit. I sent it to the thread with us and Smart Mark. I didn't look at it. You were asleep. Okay.

I didn't see it either. I've never seen any Japanese pro wrestling before this. And it was a clip free of context. It's like two minutes on, but I was like, I want to ask you about that. Because, like, first of all, I've said before about Japan. I do not mean this in a negative way at all. In fact, I admire it. They wild.

They're very wild. They, they, uh, they streets ahead in Japan when it comes to wildness. They really push the envelope. And so this clip of Japanese pro wrestling, I don't, it could have been 20 years. I don't know how recent it is. I don't know what was going on, but there were two wrestlers in the ring going at it. And then Ronald McDonald runs out. Okay.

And gets in the ring and starts essentially. sexually assaulting everybody. And like he starts like, he like puts his mouth on one dude's junk and is like waterboat and they do that shit. And he's like grabbing the other wrestlers dicks and like jerking on them and stuff like that and putting his butt up against like, like he'll go into the ropes and come back and he'll just spin around and put

his butt up against their dick and stuff like that. And they're all like, what the fuck? You know, whatever. Nobody knows how to handle Ronald's, Ronald McDonald's sexual advances. It does.

You know, and I mean, it was very funny, and I surely was entertained for that two-minute period. But I was just wondering. Like, you know, oh, we don't get the gay on us. And then he was like, I'll get the gay all over you. Or was the bit more like, well, like you said, a sexual, just a straight-up sexual assault situation. It's hard for me to say.

Yeah. They are, dude, Japanese wrestling is, is, it's lousy with some gay stuff from time. And I don't mean like it, I just like there's a lot of that. Like there's a lot of like, ooh, his butt came out, you know, Tee-he-he-he-he. You know, shit like that. So do you know that Ronald McDonald? I didn't know. I don't think I've ever. Huge over there. I don't know that I've ever seen that one. But like almost every time I see some like there's so many versions of what you just said where I'm like, I didn't even like, I didn't even expect this when you said, hey, look at this wild kind of gay Japanese shit. Like they just fucking. And it's weird too

because like from the I watch a bunch of old Japanese stuff and why a lot of people really used to like it is because there for a while Japanese wrestling did like none of that shit like when when when the WWE was getting into like Kane and the Undertaker and like the storylines were getting like oh he's he's he's dead this guy's dead but he came back to live the Japanese were still doing just like this guy's bad this guy's good this guy's you know like they'd have a cowboy and stuff but it was still more like realistic and there for a while like Japanese fans, you know, was like very like, they would sit there super serious and then they would like clap when they were supposed to. But they didn't, they didn't go insane like redneck Americans did.

But I don't know what it was. There was like a huge tonal shift where they were just like, all right, everybody's gay now. We're going to do a bunch of gay stuff and butts are coming out and it's just going to be real, real wild. You know, there's motherfuckers over there constantly fighting, uh, fighting invisible people. You know what I mean? Like it'll just be one dude shows up to the ring and like it looks like he's whooping his own. ass like that liar-lier thing. So, I mean, yeah, it does hit.

Mime and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Has anyone ever been butt-fucked by an invisible dick? In wrestling, I'm honestly not 100% sure. Like, there was this dude a while back named Joey Ryan, and he got, he, I don't really know all the details, but there was some Me Too shit going on. And after I tell you about what I'm about to say, you're like, no, no shit. His whole gimmick was that he would be in the ring and he'd be wrestling normal.

but then his finisher was he would somehow, through the power of his dick, convince his opponent to grab his dick, and then when they grabbed his dick, he would like, and he would spin them around with his dick, and he would just be whooping their ass with his dick. But like the whole thing is like, they would be like,

I don't want to touch his dick. And then all of a sudden that they can't help it, because his dick was so magnetic. Right. And I don't know this 100%, but I do think that like he was wrestling a lot of, over in Japan and like he came up with that thing and then he brought it back over here. That is hilarious.

It would be funny, but also very fucked up. I'm not advocating anybody to do this, but it would be kind of funny if somebody made a like a clip reel of those things like that. We just talked about over in Japan and stuff and they tweeted it with the word, with the title, Rasselin is gay. Yeah, like a parody of NFL. And they play this like triumphant, you know, epic music over these clips of Ronald McDonald,

grabbing dicks and all these stuff. idea for how to spend my afternoon. Trey, can I ask? I didn't see it either. The Ronald McDonald reference, is that you trying to let us know what he looked like, or did this man dress like Ronald McDonald? I mean, it was literally straight up just straight up to one Ronald McDonald. That rules.

I don't know, like, again, it was obviously all in Japanese. I don't know what he, I don't know how that relates to his gimmicks, if it does at all, I don't know. I saw one two-minute clip of this guy, but no, I'm not saying like a Ronald McDonald type of motherfucker. It was just Ronald McDonald. Straight up as Ronald McDonald's fame.

I bet they got sued. That's great. Yeah, I don't know, because this was Japan and not China. And I know I've always heard about China when it comes to like IP stuff like that, then everybody just scoffs at it. They just do stuff.

China does it all time. They're like, let's stole our shit or whatever. And people were just like, yeah, well, come over here and say it, right because they're not going to fucking you are they're not going to do a god damn thing that is a weird thing like you could kiss their ass that is a weird thing like like how does that how does copyright like

you copyright something over here well how does that work internationally because like i got to be honest with you on the country i think i got to be honest yeah and like china don't fuck with it yeah no but i got to be honest with you like if i like if i saw somebody over in china not just a chinese person but like somebody over in China doing pretty much exactly the buttercream dream and calling it the buttercream dream. I don't even think it would cross my mind to be mad. I'd just be like, well, that's what they're doing. You know what I mean?

Like, it's an homage, like whatever. Like, they're in China. What am I supposed to do? The way I first found out about this, and I've definitely told, I've told y'all that y'all were there when this happened. And I've told the story on the podcast, too, but it's been a long time. And it is kind of wild, not that big of a deal. But the reason I ever looked any of this up was because when my,

My sons were babies. For a while, Katie was like cloth diapering them and like sewing like custom cloth diapers. Did that hit for you? Selling them for it was fine. Dude, a diaper is a fucking diaper. And they did look cool. They looked, you know, that was, you know, they're trash babies because they're mine. And so like they looked a little less trashy than with that just pampered naked with pamperes running around.

That's the entire of a trailer baby, you know. So like this was more like little, it was like a little outfit, but a diaper. You know, Katie was really good at that as she is at most of those crafty things. And she was selling them to other moms and stuff. She had a Facebook page where she posts pictures of the boys and her homemade cloth diapers and shit all the time. And there was this picture of Bishop when he's like 13, 14 months old. So he's like a brand new toddler can barely walk. And he's wearing this homemade cloth diaper.

And she's like holding his little hand and it's really good, high quality picture. That was on her Facebook page like six months later or something. one of the women in a cloth diapering group on Facebook was trying to order cloth diapers from China because they're cheaper like everything is. And she found the biggest cloth diaper manufacturer in China, right? Like the whatever, the fucking pamper's of China, like a big company over there that sells cloth diapers. And she was on their website and they were advertising one of their lines of cloth diapers with pictures of Bishop of my son on their Chinese website. And she saw it in sent it to Canada. And she's like, is this your baby?

And Katie was like, look at this shit. We're like, holy, like, you know, like literally it's the exact picture. Yeah, yeah. Like they didn't Photoshopbishop's head on the little Chinese baby sitting in a basket or something. It's literally just the whole pictures, right? Like, no doubt about it. And that was really wild. And at first, I felt just like, it felt creepy.

It's invasive. Yeah, right. At first I was like, what the fuck, man. You know, like, that's my baby. That shit ain't cool. I didn't like it, obviously. But I talked to Drew, about it and also just looked it up some myself.

The immediate and general consensus was like, yeah, well, just get over it. Yeah, right. Never happened because there ain't a goddamn thing you can do about that. They will tell you, they won't tell you anything. But metaphorically, they'll tell you to go, fuck yourself. Right. And your shit out of luck. So that was the end of that.

But yeah, my oldest was briefly a Chinese diaper model. So that's cool. What's a wild about that. adding there. Yeah, I can see it. Well, it's wild about that from the perspective of like international relations. If you stole something from Sony, Sony Chinese, right? Are they Japanese? Japanese. What's a Chinese company? Huawei. Huawei. Huawei, H-U-A-W-E-I. So if you steal some of their technology here, they are registered as an American company or they have an American subsidiary that plays American taxes.

that company would come after you. Right. And when. But the Chinese government technically on paper owns really all their companies or can is allowed to, just can take it if they want. So really in their mind, you would be suing the Chinese government if you came after that diaper company. So it's just wild to me that our government will prevent you from stealing from Huawei,

Trey. Yeah. But there ain't nothing that can be done about them still in for me. Yeah, no. God, I'm going to sound like a dick here because do you all remember, God damn it. Way early on in the podcast, remember we had Kurt Metzger on. I don't even remember if that, yeah. We didn't put it out.

Yeah, because the audio was so bad. Yeah. That's how early in the process it was. That same night we interviewed that comic that was on the road with him. Yep. Yes. Rich. Nick.

Nick? Nope. Bryson, Bryson. No, it wasn't Bryson. Turner Sparks. Turner Sparks. There you go. Thank you, Corey.

I was going to get there. I was right there. I was going to get there. I knew him. Yeah. He was. So, yeah, since we never put those out, the listeners have no idea what we're talking about. This guy's a comedian who went to China and sort of while he was in China.

He kind of started a stand-up comedy scene for expats and stuff over there. But also to make money, he brought, was it ice cream trucks? Is that what it was? It was something like that. I think it was ice cream trucks. They didn't, he noticed they didn't really have the concept of like ice cream trucks didn't exist in the part of China he was in.

And he was like, well, ice cream trucks. So he like started ice cream trucks and they were a big hit. Yeah. In that region, he got more and more of them. He ended up having like a fleet of ice cream trucks like his own ice cream truck company

was doing really well. And the Chinese government just took it. Like that was joy. They literally just took the whole thing. And they just took it and they operated it. Like they kept, they didn't shut it down. They were like, hey, that's ours now. That's us now.

You have nothing to do with it. They didn't pay him. They just took it, told him to go fuck himself. And you can't, what can you do? Yeah, that don't. That don't hit. Yeah. So I mean, you know, she's wild.

And that's what the goddamn Democrats want to do over here, you see. They want to take all our goddamn ice cream stores and give him to Joe Biden so that he can sit there in his white van and lure little babies to a goddamn pizza shop. You're starting to connect the dots now, Trey. I am. I'm waking up. Yeah, you fucking tell Smart Mark, all your goddamn, yeah, y'all on your, your propaganda show,

not, you know, clearly, you don't know. You know what I mean? Like you're not seeing a bit of things. And if you want to stay asleep, please go to her in Helix mattress. There you go. Don't wake up with Helix. Have your last meal at freshly

and then call your senator on a goddamn mint mobile phone if you know what's good for you. All right, well, I have one other thing. Okay. Okay. Go ahead. It's silly. I don't know how much mileage will get out of this.

if at all, but you know, we're coming down the home stretch now. I just found this interesting. When I found out, maybe common knowledge, maybe everybody knows this. But you know those, like those classic beautiful statues, antiquities and stuff like Greek statues, like fucking David and. Are you about to talk about how they used to be colored?

Yeah. I mean, they used to, that sounds wild. But literally they were. Yes, but I saw that the other day. It's so wild because, like, they've always just been pure, like, marble.

Beautiful, shining white marble. And it seems to fit them so perfectly to us. Yeah. Impressive. But apparently all of those statues, when they were made, were like very godly painted.

Yeah. Right colors and stuff like that. And the great pyramids of Giza, solid white. Yeah, they were like blinding. Like when the sun hit them, they would blinding to look at from the horizon.

Yeah, stuff like that. The Easter Island statue, they have bodies under the ground. grounds. They're not just giant heads. Like, that's just wild to me. The Roman, I saw those, like the other day, I saw like the statue of the thinker and David and stuff like that. Like, I mean, yeah, I get that when you're used to seeing it one way for your whole life,

like they do look gaudy, but like, I mean, it's still pretty fucking rad. The way that they said that they probably looked, you know, or whatever. But like that, it is so crazy that like, it's one of those things where like, here's what we meant for it to be and then time happened but time actually made it better like you know time stripped away what we meant and now it's like

because to me it's like inarguably just it being the solid one color marble I'm like that's what it always should be and that's amazing. It's also an example of and I think we talked about this on the show before this other example of this where it's like we don't really

know shit about the past. We don't really know. Yeah. Like we don't have shit. We have this perception that like we have a good understanding of certain aspects of like ancient human culture, whatever. But we don't really know shit because of things like that. But also there's this, I think I brought this up before. Napoleon wasn't even short.

Those like ancient fertility goddesses, you know, those little statues with like the big swollen titties and stuff. And they were like they used to worship these fertility goddesses in hopes of, you know, healthy children and things like that. That's the narrative on those. Yeah. There's a lot of archaeologists who think now like, those might just be. early porn. Right. You know, like that might have been their version of porn.

They were just carving tities because that's what like DJ's old joke, you know, jerking off mud titties or whatever. But they found them in like temples, didn't they? Well, they say they're temples. That's another thing. It's just a porno store? Porn repositories. Whatever.

They don't know. We don't know. Like, that's the things like we look. I don't know about that. I don't know. I think, I mean,

I'm not saying that I believe that to be true. I'm just saying the idea that we don't really know any of that shit. is easy for me to believe, you know, like, uh, yeah, the turt that like bathrooms and shit, you know what I mean? Like, um, like,

like how would that look in the future to other people? Yeah. Well, I mean, our bathrooms now if they're like different in the future or whatever or do you know what I mean? Like with the mirrors and all the shit and there's like a fucking, I don't know.

It's same. Like the way we look at our house is they're definitely going to look at our shit the same way. Right. Yeah. how do we know, and I'm not saying I don't believe it, I just want to know how we know they used to be painted. Probably somebody found it in a record, like,

well, it was probably old scribe. I'll tell you this. Here's one. I used to be, or I painted this one red. I read that a while back, but then kind of forgot about it. And I got reminded of it yesterday because there was a post on Reddit that was a room full of terracotta warriors in China, you know, that was like recently unearthed.

This may have been an old picture, but whenever the picture was taken, this vault, this ancient tomb had just been opened. So it had been like vacuum sealed. And these terracotta warriors were like brightly painted. And they said that like within a day or two of the tomb being opened. They started fading.

That the paint chipped and faded and fell off and they were just regular gray like everybody pictures. I'm not saying that's how we know that something similar happened with one of those like, Halanic statues or whatever, but like maybe it was something like that. I don't know. But I know that that happened with those statues, just as one example. I mean, it makes sense to me. I too like a better marble.

Yeah, I'm getting screamed at. Are you got your nieces and nephews and statues with you? Yeah. Yeah, they needed me to come take over. Were you at the playground? I was like, I'll be done by four. And then we started the late. And I'm like, I'll just walk over there.

Oh, well, it's a. okay. I want to just wrap this thing up by saying that, yeah, the past is wild, but the future is where we're going to be on tour. Wellredcom, W-E-L-L-R-E-D, Comedy.com. As I said, get your, there's only like single tickets available for Atlanta right now, which is super awesome. If I had to guess, we'll probably add another show, but I don't know. Birmingham's going to be our first stop. I'm super excited. We just booked Denver. We're booking things literally every day. So if you don't see it on the website, that doesn't mean we're not coming.

We literally may have just signed a contract. So keep your ear to the ground. Subscribe to the newsletter there. And yeah, it's about high time we get back on the road. And I'm super pumped. Yeah. Hell yeah.

Can't wait. Let's do it. All right. Well, thank you all for listening to the weather. Oh, yeah. You want to do it? You do. I ain't done.

Thank you all for listening to the well-read show. We'd love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next week. If you got nothing. to do. Thank you. God bless you. Good night and skew. Pass don't hit.

Pass don't hit. All right. See y'all. Say you bye. They're the liberal rednecks. They like cornbread, but sex. They care way too much, but don't give a fun. They're the liberal rednecks that makes some people upset,

but they got three big old dicks that you. can't sun