wellRED podcast - #259 - When Is Fake Meat Gonna Be Good Enough? (Plus Other Stuff!)

Episode Date: February 16, 2022

This week the boys talk about fake meat, killing bugs, and nightmares!WellREDcomedy.com for ticketsPatreon.com/TraeCrowderCoreyWritesForYou.comCheck out Into The Abiscuit w/ Drew Morgan and DJ Lewis wherever you get your podcasts!Helix is offering up to 200 dollars off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners at HelixSleep.com/WellRED.Join Talkspace today, and start the journey to happier, healthier relationships. Just visit talkspace.com and get $100 off your first month when you use promo code WellRED at sign-up.Athletic Greens is going to give you a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com/WellRED to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance

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They're the liberal rednecks. They like cornbread, but sex. They care way too much, but don't give a thug. They're the liberal rednecks that makes some people upset, They got three big old dicks that you can suck. You know something we talk about a lot on this show, but a lot of people constantly have questions about is we always talk about dirtin and doing dirt.

Trey, how long have you been dirtin? And also, what is dirt for the people out there that don't know? Lord, I don't even know how long I've been dirtin. Long time. My old dirt head. But that's the, Dirton is taking Cratum, also known as Speciosa. And we talked about it on here before. I mean, I'm a huge advocate.

I've made fucking liberal redneck videos about it and whatnot before. You made documentaries about it. That's true. Well, I've been in documentaries about it. Yeah. But yes. That's making more. That is true.

And it, Kratem is a, it's an all natural herb, botanically related to the coffee plant that's native to Southeast Asia. And it's been used for centuries over there to help energize your mind and relax your body. And I would just say that it definitely works. it's super duper hits, again, it's basically like my coffee, the way that other white people be messing with coffee, that's dirt for me. And I've been doing it for a long time and it's had

nothing but positive effects on my life. So yeah, I'm all for it. Yeah, same. I've actually, it's, to me, it's a long time coming for us actually partnering up with an actual cratum company because it's something that we've been talking about and advocating for years. and like, yeah, I use it. Coffee is still my coffee, but Craterman coffee together, I find to be a perfect combination. That sounds like Andy, you know, I do it, I enjoy it. I have a lot of fun with it from time to time.

But Andy really kind of has used it. And look, I don't know what we're supposed to say. And this ain't FDA approved, but it has improved her life, her mental health. You know, she swears by it beyond just like, Oh, it makes me in a good mood. Like she swears by it as like something that's kind of made her regular mentally, made her feel better overall. And that makes my life a year.

Yeah, I mean, I'm not certain that we're supposed to say this as a matter of fact, but I can just tell you anecdotally in my life. I'm just saying, I'm putting it out there. This is a personal thing for me. But like it really helps the whole not doing other stuff that's bad for you part of my life. You know what I'm saying? I think that's like a kind of legal way that I can say what everybody knows what I'm trying to say is that like because of cratum, I don't really find that I need to do other things that otherwise might not be great. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, 100%. So if you're intimidated or anything by cratim, you ought not be because what you can do, you can get the capsules. Corey's a capsule man. I am. They're very easy to use. They're just, you know, little capsules with cratim inside of them. You could take those. The cratum comes in multiple different strains.

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And we thank you for sponsor in the podcast. That sucked. That was actually ant and roach spray, but it turns out if you spray enough of it, but on anything, you know, that'll do. Yeah, fuck. God damn, dude. I was just sitting here about to click record. I looked over and in my studio lot, I heard a buzzing,

and I thought it was like, oh, well, the light's fucking going out, but no, it was a goddamn wasp. So, fuck. Probably a fucking nest in here. Anyways, hey, here we are. Trey is having some sort of difficulty, and we'll be joining us soon. But, uh...

Not wasp difficulty? I don't think he's having wasp WOSP difficulties. He's having some sort of computer difficulty, which you know, Jesus Christ, that's gotten really used to all that shit past couple years.

Fuck, okay, that's just a regular buck. Sorry, I'm gonna be a little fucking, what's the term? Is it Gunshy or or something for a minute? But I'm good. That's a thing. I guess.

I fucking hate bugs with stingers. With bees, I've always been like, well, you know, they sting, but they make honey and, you know, like pollen and stuff. We need all that, yada yada. Wasps just seem like...

What do wasp do? They're just dickheads. You know what I mean? I wonder if we could get a scientist to tell us a list of animals we don't need. That would be an interesting guest to have on here. is just like, hey, like, yeah, what are the animals that it's totally okay if we hate or just fucking slaughter, smack against a wall? Right.

Take their area. Yeah, because like, I don't... What's the word? Land, uh, environment, environment. Eco system. Echoes. Yeah, yeah. Right.

Cause like I, I, you know, obviously, you know, there's the whole, David Cross used to have a joke. Like, if, a tuna was as cute as a dolphin, you know, we wouldn't be making sandwiches out of them, yada, yada, which is true. And I agree with all that. And obviously, you know, I mean horses because we want to fuck them. Right. Yeah, right. Sure. Exactly. Those things. But like, you know, and, and sincerely, I even go as far as this is just me. I'm not sitting here saying that I'm mad at anybody who kills rats, but I try whenever I have a rat at my house. I do my best to just try to try to get it outside. Dude, the funniest fucking thing that's ever happened that was horrific for everybody but me was

Karina got those mous traps that is sticky. Yeah. So you can catch the mice and then let them go. Yeah. But like, these are made by some fucking Chinese company. She got it at the Asian grocery there in Queens. This was like the highest test glue on the market. it.

Yeah. Well, this rag is one foot stuck, puts another one on there trying to get off. It's like literally starting to rip its own leg off.

Yep. No, I've seen it. She's freaking out. Gets Andy involved. Andy's freaking out. This mouse is destroying its own body.

Yeah. Yeah, it's screaming. It's freaking out. Could you actually hear it like? Wach. Yeah. I mean, I went home.

I get home. and they're like, you got to help, you got to, I'm like, there is nothing to do. You have tortured a mouse for hours in your failed attempt to like be humane. I walked it outside and stomped it to do. Yeah, and you did the right thing. And they were like, ah! And it was like, why would you do that? I was like, why would you do that?

Yeah. Why would you do that? No, you made the right call. And I actually had that same experience, which is why now, like, we have. a mouse situation for a minute and Amber got one of those and I came home to an alive mouse physically emotionally it had been gone for a while but but and it was like literally it was dude it was like doing the fucking James Franco mountain climber movie gimmick where like I think it gnawed its arm like one of its arms was fucking off is like is and I told him to this one yeah and I told

Amber I was like and I took and I took it outside and fucking you know curb stomped it And I told Amber, I was like, Amber, I'm not going to go so far as to be like, I can't believe we're killing these rats. But could you please just get at least the regular trap that like it's fucking instant, instant death? Like I don't want to torture it. And, but if I had my druthers, I would just like, you know, Pied Piper lead the rats out because, you know, I, they don't.

That like clothes. Yes. But they could eventually gnaw their way out of that. You've got to get them pretty quickly. For sure, for sure. It's like, my thing is like, I don't. I was definitely getting to a point, and I will, but to a point what I'm trying to make here is like,

the rats aren't doing anything wrong. You know what I mean? They don't know that they're invading my space. Like, they're just trying to live, so I'm trying to treat them accordingly. That said, though, fuck bugs. I'll stomp them motherfuckers to death,

but, like, really, what's the difference? I get one's like a, you know. I mean, I guess a mammal versus an insight. You could argue there's a difference in terms of their, I've heard people talk about this. Has something to do with the nervous system and the way the equivalent of a bug's brain work? There's like a question about like what pain is to them.

Yeah. If you've got an exoskeleton, I don't feel it the same way. Physically or whatever. I'm sure they get sad when you kill other family though. I think it's just like rats are not dogs, but they're close enough to looking like a pet you could have to where it just feels different. Whereas like a bug literally looks.

like an alien and I've also seen starship troopers enough to be like oh fuck this you know what I mean I think it's pretty inarguable that every mammal I can think of like feels pain on most levels definitely physical maybe even like you know like elephants berries are dead and shit so they mourn they mourn them yeah yeah so like you know they also paint whether you're eating or taking care of pests if you're killing a mammal you got to kind of just live with the back to like, yeah, you're hurting that creature. Whereas with the bug, I think it is up in the air. Yeah.

Then, like, they're fucking exoskeletons, man. Like, them shits are wild. Like, you know, ants being able to lift 10 times their own body weight or whatever. It's like, they probably don't feel pain. It's just they're either alive or then they die. You know what I mean? They're all bone. It's like, that's what exoskeleton's like bone, no flesh.

Yeah. So, like, by the time they would ever experience pain, that thing probably also killed. them in an instant, you know, like probably. But I know that like in the animal rights world, there's like pushback against a lot of these claims. My favorite one was, a matter of fact, I think this happened and came up when we went on Dave Smalley's podcast or maybe we had him on ours. And he was saying that PETA was saying that like pescatarians are no better than

regular meat eaters because the idea that a fit is. because the idea that a fish can't feel pain or fear is silly because a fish's brain is basically equivalent to a chicken. And I was like, okay, I hear that. And I hear it's okay to eat chickens. Right. Yes. Okay. Like,

I've seen the videos of cows crying as they've been being led to slaughter. I totally believe that that animal, like when we figure out how to teach animals to talk with brain stuff and computers, all they're going to be saying over and over again is why are you doing this to us? Yeah. Yeah, man. for sure. And also, like, I don't buy into the whole pescatarians are no better than other meat eaters because it's like, I don't know, at the end of the day, they are at least doing it to less groups of animals. Like, you know, I mean, if you had to rank them, you know, it's like, okay, sure, they're still killing an animal, but look at all the cows they're not eating. Like, they're at least better. Like, Dexter was still a murderer, but he was a better murderer than a lot of other murderers. But his victims deserved it, arguably. So do fish. Have you seen? That's what I was going to make sure you were following that along. And I agree with you.

Buckfish. I also, though, I want to say this, and I've argued this, like, half ingest with my vegetarian friends, mostly Pete. Revello. But also, I think there's something to it. We have this strange, I don't know, egocentric view of consciousness. I totally understand and by that bugs feel pain differently than mammals. And on that level, I totally get the argument that grass doesn't feel pain,

except that like, how do we know? You go out and you put the grass, that smell, you know, there's just a big internet meme where people are like, that's just the grass screaming. It's like,

that's how they let other grass know dangers coming or whatever. I love to warn the grass. What the fuck is the grass going to do? You know what I mean? Right. Well, trees excrete certain things to prevent bugs, from eating them and other trees tell them to do that because they can, I'm putting it in quotes, feel that the bugs are eating them. But like, what does that feeling mean? We have no relationship

to that process because we have a consciousness that is a central nervous system that even bugs don't really have. Right. But that, like, how else do we define pain, though, if not, something happens to you physically and you respond in kind? Yeah, and it don't hit. And, yeah. Yeah. So I'm not, like, I would never completely make the argument, well, you vegetarians are no better than me because you're making the plants cry. But at the same time, a part of existence is making peace with the fact that something has to die for me to live. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There is as far as I know, nothing not alive that I can eat. Yeah, I mean, that's a dick. That's how much of a dickhead I am, I guess, because like whenever, whenever they try to lay out to argue it to me, like, you know, dear, feel pain.

I'm like, yeah, I figured. I always assumed if they didn't die immediately, then getting shot through the heart with an arrow probably didn't hit. But, you know. For feelings, too. Yeah. I mean, I'd say that's not a good, you know, experience. I just don't, you know, I don't know.

I'm sure I know that going forward, you know, with like the impossible burger and like all that stuff. Like, you, dude, we probably definitely are going to get to a point maybe towards the end of our lifetimes where it's like, yeah, now you. you eating animals is purely just because you want to because there are other options that taste similar, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But like, I don't know what you're going to. I mean, I made a video about it. It did well on TikTok with the children.

That's going to be what I get canceled for. Right. In the future is there's going to be a way for us to do that and live. There's going to be no excuse us than I want to. And I'm going to, you know, be marching in that I want to parade and die of a heart attack from cholesterol. I think, though, that, like, genuinely, because my argument now, and this is true,

is like, they've just started doing this, and they're just not caught up yet. About lab meat. Yeah, lab mate. Like, yeah, I'm certain that it's like, oh, this is almost, this is good enough. Like, good enough is, good enough might be okay for some people, but I fucking love steak.

If there's something that's like, oh, this is, it's not sure it's not exactly like a Pittsburgh-seered filet mignon, but it's good enough to where you can feel morally okay. about it. That's not good enough for me. But I do think that I'm the type of person that like if I, if they made one and I genuinely couldn't fucking tell, I could get past the whole like this was made in the lab, whatever. I think there's some people with our accents that

the non-selling point of them is not necessarily just to me. It's like, I don't want fuck. There's shit grown in a lab. That scares the fuck out of me. I get that. It weirds me out a little bit. Yeah. My thing with it is not that I'm like terrified of it in general. It just don't want the bait of Yeah, that's, okay, that's kind of what I'm getting at right there. Yeah, it's like, in our lifetimes, they're going to make a bunch of advances, but it's going to be like almost.

And then the next one is like when it's like, yeah, dude, literally this is a filet mignon. And like you said, you're just making a choice. Me and Smart Mark, we're talking about this when we were watching the Super Bowl the other night. Millennials really have just gotten the short end of so many things because we were too late for some stuff and too early. for some other stuff. We were talking about comedy, but then we got into so many other things. Like,

I barely know how to use the internet, but I also missed out on being a guy who doesn't need it. Yep. Like, if Well Red had popped a decade earlier, like, somebody would be making clips for me. Exactly.

On tour, and I would be like, here's a joke I wrote about this city, put that out or whatever. Yep. And then if I was a decade later, you know, we either wouldn't have made it or we would have made it entirely

via internet stuff. The last decade I've spent getting good at the internet, but that's just one example. Now, you and I have talked about, though, there are some advantages. We have a few. So the disadvantages are things like the internet, any business that relates to internet, jobs, housing,

like the fucking music and culture. Hip-hop is the only music that hit for us. Yeah. And then we were there for the second Golden Age. hip-hop in my opinion. Oh, yeah, I agree. But some advantages we've had, nudity. We're right in the middle of this.

It's wrong. So it excites us. But people, like, you free that nipple. Yeah. You go ahead and free that nipple. In three decades, the nipple would become so free. It ain't even titillating anymore. Right.

I love to they put the word tit in titillating, by the way. Whoever did that, good job. Yeah, that's a good call. It won't be exciting to see it. a woman's breasts sexually in like three decades probably. For sure. Yeah. But it will be to us.

Exactly. We already old men of the world. Mm-hmm. We will have always had it. Like, yeah, like kids nowadays don't know any difference. They don't know anything different than being able to have a subreddit of just gifts that are nothing but bouncing naked butts. But we remember when that wasn't possible. Right.

But that's still like a porn. I'm talking about just like. It's not that it won't be titillating at all, but it'll just be like men shirtless. No, no, what I'm... What I meant by that is like in a completely separate thing of not just being titillated, but like when we, we, this actually got brought up during my Super Bowl weekend. You know, everybody's buzzed up and playing the like, would you rather, you know, go without feed or go without hands?

Just, you know, somebody's throwing out those things or whatever. And then we're deep into it and somebody's like, would you go without hand? Yeah, yeah, me too. I could get used to prosthetic hands better than I could prostitute. synthetic feet, I think. I appreciate. There are such thing as, I mean, I guess if you go from the knee down, you could do it, but you can't walk without feet.

I guess I'd have to look into prosthetic feet. Go ahead, sorry. Yeah, I would too. No, it's fine. And it got brought up to, like, somebody was like, do you remember the first time, like, explicitly, the first thing that you jade it to, you know what I mean? And I was like, I was like, yeah, I said a printed out picture of Daisy. Fwentes from America's

finance on video. That's how that's how hard it was to get material to so now that we can, we will never know. A shirt contest that didn't show any actual nudity. Yeah. Or

or it was mine. Yeah, you had to, you had to sit there and you knew that right after the, whatever the last thing on Comedy Central was from 1215 to 1 a.m. they were going to show Girls Gone Wild promos. And you had like that moment to, you know, recording it, just got to go.

But because we were waking up to those, like you fall asleep with a TV and you wake up to that. And then it was like a semester and that was how time was measured for me at this time of my life where they were pimping a thing called guys gone wild. Yeah, I wasn't for that. So I would like be asleep, pass out, watch a Comedy Central, and I would wake up and be like, do you want to see these jocks bear it all? And I would like have this fever dream of like, what?

It's it's so funny too how naive I was when all that was going on because I was like, man, I didn't know that girls were into stuff like this. I was in college. It only took me about four seconds. I was like, girls like, oh. It took me way longer. It took me way fucking longer. I said, dude, do you really think Playgirl magazine is for chicks? No, come on, buddy.

But my point was is that like we, our generation remembers, a time when you didn't have 24-7 unlimited access to porno in your phone. So we're always going to be elated and never take for granted the fact that we can scroll through these awesome gifts on Reddit. But the generation below us has never known anything different. So it feeds even more into your whole thing of like, yeah, they probably barely even get titillated by a lot of it now, whereas we are just like, oh, my God. You ever been to a nude beach or any nudist type situation?

Well, with you. Yeah, okay. That one didn't have any women at it. So it's going to be, it's similar, but it could be potentially different. Yeah, I've never been to a new. It's not for lack of wanting to go. It's just that I've never, I've never just come upon one and been like, oh, look, this is happening. There's probably 20 in our country that are advertised in a way.

Right. Where are they at? It goes away, Florida and California mostly. It goes away. yeah the sexual aspect of it pretty quickly yeah there are some exceptions because of some exceptional people but for the most part yeah for the most part that just stops being sexual so it can happen quick because i'm talking 30 minutes or less i mean you know not that considering i'm not a gay man uh there was never anything sexual about it to me when we when we did g and i but at the

time, the awkwardness aspect was kind of gone within the same time frame, which I would, you know, definitely consider the same. Like, it really was wild. Like I'm like, oh, man, I'm necking from all these dudes who are also naked. And it was just like, yeah, well, oh, now we all are. So like, I think really what I need is like, you see like two or three dicks that are the same size as yours and you're like, right on. That's what we're doing. Okay. That's a new part of it. And then I also, for me, think it was, oh, and also these guys are judging me, but I don't care. Like without the the gaze of a woman, you know, like they felt to me like there was less

shame because because there was no, I don't know, whatever that is, you know, I'm sure there's women listening like, oh yeah, you felt less judged because there was no one of the opposite sex around. Well, good for you. Yeah, accurate. And yeah, I mean, like obviously I'm not in the dating world anymore. I'm a happily married man. But like you still, that whole, I won't all the women to think I hit.

doesn't really go fully away. You know what I mean? Not just because you're married or in a relationship. Yeah. I might go away when you get old. Probably. I mean, I mean, look, man,

if just the old men I know are enough evidence, I would suggest that it fucking, yeah, it pretty well, it pretty well fucking goes away. Well, it's interesting too, because I think a lot about that stuff when you think about like, you know,

not dressing up for anybody, else or not living your life for anybody else, not posting anything for anybody else, not like trying to do what you want to do. But then I got down another layer of that and thinking a lot about it. And it's like, but this is what people want to do. Like people go like, you know, I used to dress up for men and now I don't care anymore. It's like, but you did then. Right.

You did. Like, what you wanted in your life was men to pay attention to you. So even then you were doing what you wanted. Like the idea that back then you were letting somebody else. dictate your life. It's like, well, no, that's what you wanted at that time.

Yeah, I've talked, I've talked to my sister and Amber about this because I used to have a joke, like way back. I mean, we're talking like 10,

12 years ago about women wearing high heels and stilettos and these like, uncomfortable shoes. And like, the reason I know they're uncomfortable is because they constantly

were talking about how uncomfortable their shoes were. And I was, in the bid, I was like, do you understand that men will, one of those like,

men will fuck you in a pair of A6. Like, we don't, hair and then the end it was like, by the way, you don't even have to have feet. You know, and I went through this whole fucking thing. And then, and it always worked. But I remember one time I was like doing that bit.

My sister was there and she was like, hey, that really is a funny joke. But like, you understand that like, we know that. We're not wearing them for y'all. We're wearing them for other women. And I was like, well, that's fucking silly too. All the girls walk by dressed up for each other. Is that the boss or is that Van Morrison? trying to think of the song

I'm just up oh each of come on and dance is it come on out and dance It is Van Morrison Come on out and dance Yeah You're right

Hey speaking to the boss Him and Mellon Camp are about to put out An album together I heard the first single yesterday It's pretty fucking tight That's wild Weren't they like Made to be rivaled by the media

Kinda Yeah kind of And I was listening to John Cougar I don't know what he is now, but it's John Cougar Melanchamp to me. I'm not, I don't think you can dead name the guy. I don't think that's the same fucking thing. So he was.

No, he was ashamed of his family. No, I don't think that's what it was. Was it? Oh. I think he was John Cougar because he thought it sounded cool. Yeah. And then his dad was like, that hurts my feelings. Oh, really?

It was like, all right, I'll be John Cougar Mellencamp then. Okay. John Cougar Mellon Camp sounds pretty fucking badass. Yeah, I was listening to him being interviewed by Steve Earl. And, yeah, they apparently what happened, they got, they got together and, uh, they just started fucking around and writing. And, uh, anyways. And he's like, yeah, and we, uh, we, we, we've just, we just finished a painting together that's this big, huge, like 40 by 20 fucking fucking fucking foot painting or some shit. And, and it's, I know, it sounds like it. And Steve was like, way better podcast than that fucking Bruce Springsteen Obama bullshit. I've never heard. I think against the idea of that happening. It's just like that had to have been so. what's the word I'm looking for? Up your own ass. Well, and like pre, like, there wasn't nothing honest about, you know, the idea of a podcast

is you just kind of hang out and talk. There's no way it wasn't like very premeditated. Right. Whereas John Cougar-Mellencamp and the boss, who knows, episode six, they might get in a huge fight. Yeah, yeah. But John Cougar-Mil was talking about how they just finished this painting together. And Steve Ruhl was like, oh, man, right on, I know that you paint all the time, but I didn't know that Bruce painted.

And he goes, he don't at all. He doesn't. does not paint, but he helped me with this painting. We're about to auction it off. Anyways, that's how I found out they had a new album and then they played the single and like, I mean, I'm fucking in. You know? Yeah. Yeah.

So just pause for a second. Let's go back here. So what you're saying is that John Cougar-Mellicamp painted something. And in order to get it sold, his buddy Bruce allowed him to put his name on it. He just like put his hand in some paint and went, there you go. There you go. This is about the first painting by Bruce Springsteen.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What was their beef about? I know, like, you know, they made similar music, but was it that, like, John Cougar Mellencamp is actually, like, comes from a working class background and Bruce don't? You know, I don't know, I mean, me personally, I don't know if they ever actually had any,

or if it was just one of those, like, literally the media just fed into America's, like, natural obsession with being binary on something. It's like, well, if... Christina and Brittany. Yeah, it's like, well, we can't just like, we can't just like stuff. We have to like one thing more than the other. So like if you're, you know, if someone's like, I'm, oh, I love Bruce Springsteen.

What? No, John Cougar, Mellencamp. And it's like, oh, yeah, no, him too. But like, well, but. So, I mean, I genuinely have no idea. It could be anything. Or like, they genuinely could have had some fucking song rotting beef. I don't know.

But they don't know. They don't know how much there. I know with comedians, that's a thing, you know, because of like, oh, he stole my bit or he's ripping off my act or whatever. I don't know how much that is in music. They're definitely like, they are a similar. Yeah, it's got to be a similar thing. It's got to be that when, for like of a better word,

the brand is so specific with what they were doing. But it's also that music's been around so long. I guess it was different back then. But it feels like so silly to be like claiming you're ripped off in music because it's like you're not doing anything different. Like, you know, you do something different. different by making it sound different. But as far as like your angle or your lane,

there ain't nothing new in music. It ain't been in a long time. I agree. Probably since the beginning of rap. Agreed. And on that note, let's take a quick break. Hey, we're back on the well-read podcast, and we are joined by the Don Dada himself,

the OG liberal redneck. Thank you so much for gracing us with your presence. Mr. Trey Crowder, everybody. Yeah, I. We got him on the podcast. I know, this is great. You got anything to plug? No.

Okay. No, nothing hits. Yeah, sorry. I don't know. You know, sometimes your computer just poop. Yeah. Yes. My computer just pooped.

Mine does a thing where it will wait until I have like a really important meeting. You know, usually, usually it's always like, oh, just the well-read podcast. I'm ready and willing. But then if it's like, hey, y'all got a call with Fox. My computer will be like, hey, man, you. You need all new software. Like all of it. It sucks.

So that's what happened here. So what are y'all talking about? We were just talking about, Drew, what were we did? You just made a point and then I threw to a break. We've been talking about beefs and music and beefs and comedy. We were talking about John Cougar, Millingham, and the boss. Apparently, they're doing an album together, but we're pretty sure they used to be either rivals or perhaps media created a narrative

pretending they were rivals. We've also been talking about mammals and bugs and plants and people, eating all those things and having different feelings about the morality of eating something that can feel pain. I think that covers most of it. Okay. Well, I woke up at like two in the morning the other night and made a note. This is so raven.

Like this is, I made a, I was like, what should talk about this on the podcast, right? And so I made a note of it. And, you know, you'd think that, like, it would be. completely incomprehensible the next day or whatever. Yeah. It's a halibut moment. Yeah, right. But it's not incomprehensible, but it is just, it's very ravened the way that I termed it.

And then I forgot about it for two or three days and then read it again today. And I was like, I couldn't believe that I still remembered what I meant, but I still termed it ravenly. And what I wrote down was the vicious luck of uncertain circumstances. Jesus. Oh, is that your, no, that's your fucking special name. is what. Yeah. And I also wrote,

and I wrote another one that was my crazy and unpleasant, lucid dreaming lately, two separate categories, but that one's pretty straightforward. Those both sound like they could have been the alternative title to Birdman. Yeah, right. Yes.

Well, the first thing is just, I don't know why I was thinking about it in the middle of the night. I think I just woke up and was like, oh, we should talk about that on the podcast because it's been, it's been texted about it in the thread recently, but just like because of Matt Stafford and went in the Super Bowl and we were talking about how like just with depending on how high level of a view you take of everything your circumstances in life or just the sort of just fortune or luck or however you want to put it amounts to like almost all of personal success and like so I brought it up and I was talking about just you know Matt's

Stafford got drafted by the Detroit lines and he was with the Detroit lines who are an inept franchise for 12 years and got and did nothing ever. They went to the playoffs like twice while he was there and I don't know that I don't think that no they didn't win a playoff game this whole time there. He leaves. He goes to Los Angeles Rams who admittedly are stacked but I'm saying he goes to a good team and literally the very first year outside of Detroit he wins the Super Bowl and it's just like so we were texting like imagine how many guys like came in. and went in the NFL and you never heard about them because they got drafted by a coach that didn't know how to use them or didn't like them or whatever or and then vice versa

people that ended up in ideal circumstances. Like I know we were talking about this with cousin Matt Stafford earlier in the year and Corey was like if Michael Strayhan hadn't been drafted by the New York Giants, he wouldn't be hosting Good Morning America right now. And I believe that 100% to be true. And that stuff's just why I'll think about. So I said that and that's sort of as much as I meant. But then Mark, smart Mark was He said in pretty typical Mark fashion, I thought he was like, he was like, yeah, dude, fucking Matt Staffer is born the same guy in Mongolia. He's just some dude that can throw a goat really far, you know, or whatever. Like, nobody gives a shit and it doesn't matter what he can do.

And then I started thinking about like all the, and other people pointed this out, all the like Albert Einstein's who were born in Huffles in Jakarta or whatever, you know. and like that's happened innumerable times over the course of human history. And that shit's just really wild to think about. Like when you think about it like that, it's almost all luck at a certain. Oh, yeah, man. Do you remember that linebacker that played at Ohio State? I think his name was Casamoya. It was a Polish last name, ball guy, white guy.

He was the highest drafted linebacker in a long time. He got drafted as soon as he was eligible for the draft. This was when we were, I mean, we were young. he essentially was a bust. He had a great rookie year, and then what happened was they tried to teach him to plays, and he was too dumb to do it. But he had a famous interview where he said

that growing up in Poland on his block, he was the sixth or seventh best athlete of his age and size, but that those kids didn't move to America. Right. And he's like, and one of them did become a professional soccer player and is richer than me, But the other ones, what happened to them?

I don't know. Probably when they went to prison because he grew up like he was in a real poor situation, supposedly, you know. So yeah, it's super, super wild to think about the circumstances of anybody's life being what dictates a lot of. And I think that the fear of that, like the kind of subconscious knowledge that people have of that, is what drives all this grind culture bullshit and all these motivational speakers. what they're selling is the idea to people that you have control over that stuff. Right. You have control,

more control than you say. Yep. I, 100% agree with that. Well, it's like, you know, if you just grind real hard,

if you just work real hard, you will end up hitting. It's like, no, you might not. You might not. You might not. Or else the time of the American dream,

really. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. I mean, that's literally all it is. It's like, yes,

dude. Now here's the deal, like, in order, like, a dude like Matthew Staffer or whatever, like, yes, you still aren't going to ever be an NFL quarterback without the hard work. Like, that's awesome.

But, but. There's probably a hundred Staffords a year. And, and also, it's not good for a poor person to just be like, oh, well, I was born poor, so therefore I may as well not even try. However, yeah, the whole, like, no, all you have to do is work hard and everything will come true is more bullshit than any of that. I don't think, I think if you're not working hard, if you ever do get a lucky chance, lucky break, if you're not working hard, it ain't going to pan out.

Yes. But I don't think that everyone's going to get a lucky break. Most people, in fact, are not. Well, that's what Whoopi told us that time. I won't say her last name. I don't want to seem like we're name dropping, but, um, but whoopee was basically like, she's like, yeah, every, in this business, you have to have luck. but the ones who make it are the ones that busted their ass so hard that when that luck comes,

they were prepared for it. Like you have to be prepared for what to do once you get the lucky break. So like, yeah, again, Tom Brady, you can't just luck your way into seven Super Bowls and the career he has. But like, you know, coming from a good family helps, being able to go to college that helps. Like there's somebody that was born in a gutter who has the same work ethic as Tom Brady and we'll never fucking hear about them. There's a guy I follow on Twitter who's a comedian named Jake Flores.

Yeah, yeah. Pod Save America or? Yeah, Pod Damn America. Yeah, the better one, yeah. Yeah, and it's, you know, that's how he makes his living now. He was supposed to be on Comtown and something happened. It's like a famous story in that world. So he oughtn't be a millionaire because everyone on that show is a millionaire now.

But anyway, he tweeted something the other day and it was something like, you had to really make in his business. you've got to be born cute and to a father who committed war crimes and made a billion dollars off of it. And what was so funny was I thought I knew who he was sub-tweeting. And then he put like in a reply, everyone's coming back at me. This could be about six people. And then I read all the replies.

And there were at least seven people offered up by the fans or the replies of like who he was talking about. And I started thinking about all of them, the ones I knew, I was like, oh, that could apply to them. And that could apply to them. Oh, and that could have played of them. And it's like, wow. Now, obviously, some of these people that they were mentioned,

I mean, the one that is always brought up is Julia Louis Dreyfus, we've talked about her in the pockets, incredibly talented. Yeah. Like, the point here is not that these people aren't incredibly talented. It's just that, like, it's not a coincidence that a certain percentage of even in our world where it does require so much talent of these people are born rich. Nick Kroll was one that came up, who I think is very talented. Apparently his dad is super rich and does fucked up things.

Rosebud Baker is making it right now. A big part of her whole thing is acknowledging. One of the Bush people is her godfather. So her whole thing is acknowledging all that. Yeah, I'm fine with it. It's like good. Those people should go into the arts and do something that doesn't matter. You know what I mean?

Like fucking Julie Louis Dreyfus, what if she wanted to be a school teacher, then everybody would be like, see, she's taking a spot from a girl that actually needs that. You know what I mean? At least in the arts, it's like, eh, we're all just fucking around. Nobody would be mad at a particular teacher's spot. You never know. One teacher that didn't get that job and was like, God damn it, she's got a billion dollars.

She doesn't need this shit. Might, you know what I'm saying? Maybe. I don't know. But if any of us were born in Mongolia, we'd all have to be some kind of shepherd or farmer. I mean, that's probably very reductive and slightly racist to say about a country. But statistically speaking, we definitely wouldn't be on a podcast talking about Matthew Stafford right now.

Yeah, for sure. Oh, dude, I'm one of the luckiest motherfuckers that has ever lived. So, you know, I just do my fart stuff. and go on about my day. Well, also, this is a weird, like a kind of pedantic way to look at it, but also we're often comparing other people who are lucky, too. It's like, man, if she wasn't born rich, I don't know if she'd be in a movie.

It would be this other girl who was born really hot and smart. You know what I mean? Right. Right. Yes. Yeah, for sure. But, like, Julia Louis is one that, like, you know, she, there's plenty of people that, like, all they got is the,

I had a lot of opportunities in rich parents part, and they do kind of just coast the Kardashians. At least she does clearly put the goddamn work in. So like, what was she supposed to do? Just sit at home? Man, I hate the Kardashians, but I got to give them their props. I think they invented a thing, or at least perfected the thing Paris Hilton invented.

Like, they're like, if you look at the most follow people on Instagram, that family, three or four of them are in the top 20. Yeah. No, I know. I'm just, you know, their skill is, they don't, they don't not have a skill. Their skill is they know how to market themselves and they know how to be controversial and, and, yeah, I guess, you know what. Even that, even them, like, they were born to this family and this region and were right for, they were, they happened to be in the right place at the right time as far as reality TV and what that ended up being and being at the forefront. of it and whatever else.

And also she sucked a wiener on camera or whatever, which raised the profile and whatnot. But like the star is aligned for them. OJ literally murdered a person and this is all happened. Well, how many women have sucked wieners and not gotten what those ladies have gotten? I mean, it's clearly a lot of luck. Most of them. Yeah. It's a lot of luck.

Yeah. We've been watching The Deuce on HBO. And there's a woman. Galfan. Hoccus. Gallif Fanakis is not in that at all. No, he's not. You're talking about, isn't it, Franco?

Franco and. Franko and then. Maggie Gillian. Show about horrors and porn stars at times where we were back before they cleaned it up. Is it hit? It hits real hard. One of the main women, she plays a 20-year-old college student. And I was looking at her, and she looks young, but you could tell she's not.

So I was just like, where old she is? She's 37 playing a 20-year-old, and she's Russian, and she mostly hides her accent, but it comes out ever once in a while. And like, she's a good actor, but I'm like, she knows somebody. I don't know what her family had dirt on who or what it was. But like, you're opposite Franco on HBO. I don't care if you're a good actor. You're playing an American 20-year-old and you're a 37-year-old Russian.

Is she supposed to be like a super hot American 20-year-old? And she is. Yeah, right. I guess my only thing was they're like, yeah, well, you know, if you look at pictures of people in the 20s, they all looked older. So it's going to play, you know, like. It's like the late 70s and I hear you, but that's not how Hollywood works. No, yeah, you're right.

No, I know. You're 100%. Oh, this, why did I think the show took place in the 20s? Because you said 20s and, yeah, okay, I'm an idiot. She's 20. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Not in her 20s. The character is 2-0.

No, you're right. I mean, dude, that is not how Hollywood fucking works, man. Like, we've talked about this probably on pod before, but like, I mean, some of it, it's like, it's like, you can't even deny it when it's like, dude, what's the last thing Michelle Fiffer did? Look at Meg Ryan. We're talking about, we're talking about actresses who were like the it thing. And then when they got a certain age, it was just fucking over.

And then there's dudes who didn't even come close to sniff and how hard either one of them hit who stay, stay busheemi for the love of God. I love Steve Buscemi and he's great. But the man looked like a foot. You know what I'm saying? There are two different roles that they were playing. They were playing leading ladies. Right. I'm about saying, you need to compare them to other leading men.

What you're saying is still true. But I just wouldn't use Bouchardemia as the comparison. Yeah, you're right. You are right. Actresses like, you know, famous character actress, Margo Marlowe. But there's still more dude. It's still true no matter how you frame it. Do you say, if you come about Meg Ryan and then, it should be like, I don't know,

Billy Crutter, who's super hits for me. He's fucking awesome. But do you think that like some of these like Megrine and Michelle Fifer just refuse to play any role aside from the leading lady and therefore that's why they weren't doing a lot of work? Or do you think people refuse to cast them in anything other than the leading lady? I don't know. I have no idea. I think God damn, why is the most famous woman in Hollywood's name escaping me? The lady.

No, the president and Don't Look. up. Oh, Merrill Streep. I think Merrill Streep is taking literally every single role. She has four movies a year and they just can't get in it. Yeah, but that's the thing. There's only that many female characters being written that are leading.

Yeah, you're right. I could see them people being like, I'm not playing the goddamn, I'm only the leading lady because I'm the romantic interest of the dude who the movie's really about again. I'm just not doing it. You know, that's going to limit your options.

No, I know. No, I know. I mean, you can't take that tag. No, I know. And that's my point is that it clearly has, but I can see that. There's clearly a longer shelf life for leading men. But doesn't it cut the other way to a certain extent in that you can't make it as a leading man until you're about 33? Ham, Clooney, even Brad Pitt was a leading man, but in a very different type of role than he gets now.

Yeah, I do think you're right about that, too. It seems like women, they're like on. They always cast the older dude. with a young woman. You know, like you get to hit real hard as a woman, you better be doing it by the time you're 20. By the time you're 22. What?

Did you dream that word too? No, that's a real word. That's what they are. They're all real words that you wrote down on your piece of paper. Yeah. Well, anyway, but with dudes,

it is, it's rare, it's more rare for them to hit that hard at like that young of an age, like Tom Holland or some shit. And he was literally playing a teenager. You know what I mean? Yeah.

DiCaprio had to play teenagers to do it too. Right. Yeah, that's true. When he first came out, he was playing teenagers as a 24-year-old. How old was he in Titanic? I don't know. Hoop Dreams was the first one, and he played a 14-year-old. Basketball Diaries.

Houtreys is the actual documentary that's on HBO. Yeah. Is Basketball Diaries good? I never saw it. Yeah, it's fucking wild. It's fucked up. What do you mean? Like, how?

Like abuse. Oh, yeah. Abuse and stuff. Yeah, like he gets like, oh, my. Yeah, it's different. I can watch a kid get beat. I mean, not that, that sounded horrible. I don't want to.

I'm just saying, like, I can watch that. Trey froze looking so bored at that comment. Like, you just froze in a normal way. But, like, Corey was like, I watched the kid get beat and you were in. I in no way meant that I'm okay with kids getting beat at all. I'm just saying that is a different thing. Like, in a movie, if a movie's about sexual abuse, I can, I'm going to have to be in a specific mood to watch it. But if it's just about a kid getting his ass whooped, I can,

deal with it. And then, you know, does that make sense? It's one. It makes sense to me, but I don't want to talk about kids getting beat anymore.

I don't, I don't either. I'm just saying like, I have a question for you. This came up earlier, and I really want your opinion on it. Corey and I were talking about when lab grown meat becomes a thing that is pretty common and available and all that.

And it's like the moral and environmental thing to do will you do it. Dude, how close does it have to be? And I'm not, listen, this is fine. But before the pandemic happened, we had to stop to her. And I had a whole bit about how I couldn't wait to eat lab-grown meat. But instead of, we're asking, will you replace it? Yeah.

How good does that be? Well, I mean, if it hits exactly as hard, then yes. That's what I said. What if it's an 8 to 10 comparison? Do what? What if it's 80% as good? Mm-mm. 20% off is a lot.

way off, I would argue. It is, dude. If it's like, if dollar store meat versus, you know, actual hitting meat is a 20% difference, I would say. A 20% discount in a store is a big of a vegan. I love to hear a vegan who only dates guys over six foot tall. Called bullshit on you on that.

Yeah. It takes 20% that guy's dick. See what happens. Yeah. I'm just saying I fucking, you know. No, assuming that they can replicate it exactly, I have, it won't bother me at all. And the whole point of the bit was like,

you know the shit I eat already? Like you think I give a fuck what I'm eating? Like I can wait to eat some fucking, you know, science meat or whatever. I think if it's 90, 80 or 90, I'll do it like in spaghetti. Because I already do that a little bit with turkey. Like spaghetti turkey ain't as good. But, you know, it's better for me. So I do it sometimes.

I mean, dude, I'll eat that. I've eaten that impossible whatever. Like the fake ground meat. Yeah. You know. It ain't bad, but it blows my guts up. Yeah. Well, I don't know.

I feel like it's fine. Like, I could definitely eat that in spaghetti or chili or whatever, and it don't. It already don't bother me. So, I mean, yeah. But I thought we were more talking about, like, like a lab-grown steak or a big pork chop or something like that. And it's like, that's the shit that I'm going to need it to be the same in order for me to slide that. Ground beef, yeah, surely they can approximate that closely. This is probably a part of your head.

A hamburger helper with, you know. Right. Well, this is probably already a part of your bit. This is definitely the tenor of it. But like, Taco Bell's ground beef. Taco Bell's in there. It's already been suspect for a minute. That was one of the examples I used was Taco Bell's meat, for sure.

Speaking of things that are 20% off, let's take a break real quick. All right. Yeah, I'm with you on that turkey, turkey meat mess. Like, turkey bacon is, genuinely, I could, like, if my doctor right now was like, hey man, I'm sorry, but like your cholesterol, I could be like, okay, with turkey bacon's pretty good. Like, it's definitely, it's not the fucking same, but it's, it's pretty good and it's okay. But like, I look at certain things like, you know, people are like, oh, you know, I'm losing weight because like when I get a craving

for pasta, I just use zoodles instead. And my whole thing on that has always been like, I genuinely do like zoodles, but that's because I like zucchini. But I'm eating that and I'm going, this is a different thing. 100%. It's not, it's not feeling the void that pasta is going to feel for me. Like if I need... God-sized hole in the heart. I've been putting pasta into it for 30 goddamn years.

Well, you know, you know. Still there. But I need to more more pasta. But we try. We try. We try. Yeah. But I can...

Don't stop trying. Yeah. But I'm just saying like... That's what a bad ass is when he gives up. Yeah. I just tell Emma all the time. Look, if I'm craving pasta, literally the only thing that's going to do is pasta. But I fucking like throughout the week if Amher was just like, hey, I'm going to make some Zoodles and meat sauce, I'd be like, hell yeah, rip it up.

Because I like fucking zucchini. But like, it's way different, you know. I made pasta for Andy last night for Valentine's Day. Oh, yeah. I'll talk about what we did. I got all the good husbands out there. And I had a plate. And I was like, yeah, that's good.

I did good because pasta spaghetti specifically with meatballs or baganese is my thing that I just can't. Sit down to watch the deuce. She went to pee. Didn't even get through one episode and my ass was back in there. I was like, oh, I did good this time and I ate four fucking helpings. It was also making spaghetti sandwiches, which I ain't done in years. Damn, I love a spaghetti sandwich. They're so good.

I bet I ate 2,000 calories last night. That's what's up. It was what's up. Me too. I definitely did. My hands are a little numb, but I feel really good. They're numb? Yeah, they're tingle.

It happens to me when I eat a lot of carbs. I'm not sure what it is, and I've never asked the doctor. I wouldn't. I don't want to know. Some of them substitutes bullshit, too. Like, I used to have more examples in this. But I remember when I first started dating Katie, she was like a fucking personal trainer and fitness competitor and stuff. She was hardcore about all that shit.

And she had all, she introduced me a lot of that stuff for the first time. And like, and at first I was blown away by some of it. Like, like, the only one I can remember for sure is like she would use this thing called liquid amino acids, right? Which are substantive. And she's like, you substitute this for soy sauce. And I was like, it ain't nothing hits like soy sauce, right? And then I tried it. And I was like, that literally tastes exactly like soy sauce.

It does. Yeah. Less sodium. It's supposed to be just, yeah, it's just better for, but that, but what I'm saying is it's not that those are complete fucking. fucking bullshit. If you actually look at like what's on the back of it, the way that gets you with those is they fuck with the portion so much that it like changes what, you know. A serving size is. Yeah, right. And what the numbers are. And it's really no fucking better for you. And there's a lot of things that are like that. It's like, or there's so many different kinds of

protein bars that's just like, this is just a candy bar. Yes. That has like protein in it or whatever. But Snickers has 10 grams. It ain't good for you. Right. There's so many of those, so many of those things out there like that that are just total horse shit actually. You gotta like really watch it. It's just like, dude, at the end of the day, it's like fucking broccoli and chicken breast

or fucking whitefish or egg whites or like things like that, you know, like. Yeah. You're trying to like replicate anything that hits with something that like it's supposed to have the same, but hits harder. It ain't, it's not, that ain't going to hit ultimately. You got to really like meat, getting back to the lab meat, does there, like, if you're going to try to do it right and clean, you just got to like meat and broccoli. Like, that's how you, you know, that's the secret is to enjoy white fish and a lean steak. Yeah, I mean, that's a cheat code for me is I genuinely do like all that stuff, but do you do, is there a, is there a replacement that you all found like, oh, actually this surprisingly hits harder for me.

Does that happen to you? No. I mean, I think regular Greek yogurt is like, it ain't as good. It's very close to sour cream, but like I also, I don't think it's actually all that different from fucking sour cream at the end of the day, despite what people say.

So, no, I can't think of anything. I might be misremant. I might be forgetting something. I think when I put hedonism in place of God, that was way back. Heard up. Mine is, and I don't know in terms of calories or,

any other health if it's any better either because I also know that you know vegan is not a synonym for healthy but when I did that little experiment where I tried where I tried to go vegan for two weeks which I did um I ended up finding that vegan cream cheese I like better than regular cream cheese uh it's something to cut they it's like coconut there is one that's almond cheese, but this specific brand, and this is not a plug, but I think it's called Viola for something. I still to this day exclusively get that instead of cream cheese. Like now, if I was making like a cream cheese dip or something, I don't know, but like sometimes I just like as a snack, a little tiny smear a cream cheese on a whole wheat cracker, and that

fucking cream cheese to me is better than regular cream cheese. I just, it tastes better. The consistency is better. I just fucking like it. So like, I buy vegan cream cheese, but not, I'm not fucking vegan. I just found that. And I'm like, that hits harder. yeah no i ain't got i ain't got nothing like that i don't know and i don't i've never that's like

i believe you because i know how you be especially with both creams and cheeses uh but like hearing that's hard for me to believe just hearing that i've never tried i know no it both cream cheese just hits so hard that i agree but i like oat milk better than milk and most things other than cereal i love oat milk you don't like it in cereal it's i like milk better in cereal. I do like it in cereal. But it's a replacement for milk in every other way. Coffee. It's so much better in coffee.

I agree. The consistency is fucking awesome. I mean, is it better for you? I don't know. I mean, I think so. It's just water and oats. You know what I mean? You even making it around. It's hitting for me. It's definitely better for and again, for the record, if you're out there

I don't give a fuck, I'd drink milk. I, but like it has to be better for the environment just because like you're not continuing it yourself probably yeah yeah some of those produce like almond milk apparently is horrible it is yeah it is like water usage thing it's like it takes a shitload of water to make one almond tree or whatever and it takes a fuck ton of almonds to make one thing of almond milk so that's really bad i do make my own oat milk though uh because i make i make overnight oats and like that you end up just getting you just end up getting oat milk because of that and i didn't realize that. I was like, oh, shit. I'm making

overnight oats, and the byproduct of that is like, you pour that out, and that's fucking oatmeal. And so, like, yeah, I mean, I feel like I'm doing it, you know, the right way. But again, these are not because I give a shit. It's that I like, oats are a very good pre-workout situation, and I

just made it myself, and then I was like, oh, look at that. Fucking oatmeal. Look at you, buddy. That's awesome. I ain't never fucked with oats. I don't know if I resented them. It's like, this is just gruel. I know what this is. This is porridge. This is peasant food trying to say, you know, I don't have to eat this shit. No, that literally.

But what about when you were a peasant? No, I know. That's what I'm saying. It's funny how porridge. That never factored man. I just didn't like it. I love. Yeah, all the names for like poor people food are why I like porridge is a funny name for that.

But dude, gruel. Yeah. So funny. Do you think it's. And even things taste rich. Like, that has meaning. Oh, there's a lot. That's rich.

Decadent. Thanks for decadent, you know. Yeah. Right. I'm always saying this just because I mentioned it earlier and I'm sure people are on the edge of their seats. Not true at all. But like, do you ever have, you know, lucid dreams, dreaming you know you're dreaming? Do you ever have one that's super don't hit?

And also you can't escape it. Okay. Well, see, dude, for a long time, and it's always been rare always. But for a long time, anytime I would dream lucid, lucidly, I could be like, oh, shit, I'm dreaming. And then I'm out. I could do whatever I'm. I won't. Like I can fly if I wanted to in a little dream.

But lately, that ain't been happening. It's just been like, this is a dream. This don't hit. I won't this be over. I'm going to wake up. And then I can't wake up or I do wake up, but I'm still in a dream. And I don't know it for a second. And then I realize, like, God damn it.

I'm still dreaming, but I can't actually wake up. And like, I have this odd sense. I start to have this odd experience, this odd sensation that I literally can't describe. But it's like a physical. It's almost like a. I don't know, like a nervy, like a nervy buzzing type of thing or something that I feel like is like a side effect of my brain fighting itself or something. I don't know what the fuck is going on, but like it don't happen to me that often, but it happens the night I made this note a couple of nights ago. And it fucking sucks whenever it does.

It's anxiety, man. Yeah, it's anxiety. When I was like going through the worst part of it, like I would go through the worst part of it, like I would go. through that stuff kind of like when I was awake. And that buzz you're talking about, I remember one particular day. I'd have panic in the acts most of the night. And then I'd slept kind of, but then had those lucid dreams where I knew I was dreaming, but I couldn't wake up and there was a demon and all that.

I can feel that shit the whole day the next day. It's the worst. Yeah, it's kind of like the way I feel about it is like, you know, when people are really hung over and they're like, God, my head's in a vice right now. I'm like, my whole body's in a vice. you know what I mean it's not like a it's not like a flu like muscle pain it's just a general tightness and feeling of just like being in a it's like you know I'm like in a fucking casket and I can't get out and everything just I'm just kind of like uh and like yeah I get that

so I'll just have a dream and I'm like I got anxiety in the dream and I'm like well fucking you know my whole day's gonna suck I get sleep paralysis though too so like maybe that's you ever get We talked about that, right? We have talked about it. No, I've never got that. I got paralyzed. I got so drunk and high once in college that I couldn't move. Yeah, being there.

Literally couldn't move. I wanted to so bad and couldn't do it. But I don't think that's the same thing as sleep paralysis. No, that's just being fucked up. Yeah. But that doesn't hit either. But yeah, no, I don't know. I've always like, I mean, we've talked about this before.

I could count on one hand the number of times that I believe I've experienced anxiety. And it's like, it feels like I'm about to freak out, but I never have like freaked out. But I'm like, this is what anxiety is. In my head, that's what anxiety is. I don't have that feeling any other time. So that's why I always say it's like, I don't really have anxiety problems. Of course, I have depression problems and I worry about things, but I don't feel that sensation ever, usually. You know, very, very, very rarely.

So like, you know. But there's a lot going on lately. Yeah, but I don't have. But I'm saying I, if I'm not feeling that, I don't interpret things as being anxiety is what I'm trying to say. Sure. Because I don't know what that is. Denying what your mental health issues are is a favorite pastime of our people.

But what is that? What's the difference? Between what? Okay. You know the feeling like, the feeling of like you're about to freak out? Yeah. That's a different manifestation of it.

And I don't know if that's a higher level or a lower level or whatever. But what we're talking about is our symptoms of anxiety. We're just describing different ones. And we push down most of the feelings related to anxiety because they're fucking negative feelings. Yeah. And we've learned to live with a certain level of anxiety. Flying on planes, not getting good sleep, having. careers that don't have steady paychecks.

Like, we've learned to live with a certain level of it anyway. That's my opinion. I mean, it could be wrong. It could be some pill you're fucking taking. Are you taking those vitamins too late at night? Because those vitamins, by the way, those vitamins rule. Athletic greens are fucking awesome. But they got vitamin B in them.

I don't recommend anybody take vitamin B too close to bedtime. Yeah, I'm actually about to go take my shit right now before I hit them woods because, yeah, well, shit does hit. Same to song. Oh, is it cool if I plug your stuff first, Trey? Would you like me to do that? Tell them all about what you got going on here.

Yeah, you go on Patreon, patreon.com slash Trey Crowder. I've been doing my own thing there for a while and about to add some more stuff to it that will be announced real soon and may or may not involve my weekly political podcast, weekly skews, which is live at five people. Pacific live streamed every Tuesday on all my social media pages, but also you can get it wherever you get all your podcasts or on my YouTube page and all that stuff if you're not free at that time. So, yeah. Awesome. And go to well-read comedy.com.

Come see us. Absolutely. Was it my turn? Yeah. Okay. I didn't say anything. I thought you saw the thing that I put up. I just did when I said it.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Andy Obisket is a podcast I do with our good buddy DJ, who everybody knows and loves or you should by now. Yeah, it comes out every Friday-ish. You can also see it on my YouTube page. And I also want to plug Bubba Shot the podcast,

a 90s country nostalgia podcast we do together. I also want to plug Well Red Show in Knoxville, Tennessee on March 5th. You can get tickets at well-redcomedy.com. I'm so excited. It's a bit of a homecoming for us or at least Trey and I. Corey, to a great extent, too. It's the Bejue Theater, which is just, oh, it's just, it's just peaches. I just love playing that place.

I'm so excited about it. March 5th at well-readcom for tickets. Yeah, absolutely. I'm pumped about that show, too. They just turned 113 years old, the Bejew Theater did. By God, happy birthday to them. Can't wait to be there. You can, hey, if you want to get some of my silly stuff, go to Corey Wrights for You.com,

doing a lot of cool things over there, one of which is this week in Southern History. and this week the topic is Mark Twain writing Huckleberry Finn so that's what we're going to be exploring. That will be out later this week. There's the written version and the audio version and yada, yada, yada, but subscribe. You'd make me very happy. And subscribing helps me will help me be able to put out more stories in the future

and I'm having a great time doing it. And I love everybody that has already subscribed. Appreciate you very much. Did you ever think of calling it Corey Wright's Forrester? That's not that bad. I thought that's what you're about to say when you say Corey Wright's Forrestor. Corey Wright's Forrester.

Yeah, you know what I should do is keep making my name more goddamn confusing for everybody. Thank you all for listening to the well-read show. We love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next week if you got nothing to do. Thank you, God bless you. Good night and skew. All right, fuckers.

All right. Yeah