wellRED podcast - #284 - Christian Doctors Vs. Atheist Doctors + Beyonce & Lizzo Said An Australian Bad Word!

Episode Date: August 10, 2022

This week the boys talk about whether or not they would want their doctor to be religious, words that are slurs in some places but not in others, and read a few listeners emails!Check out Corey's new publication at CoreyWritesForYou.comListen to Corey and Trae's new podcast Puttin On Airs wherever you get your podcasts, or at WatchPOA.comGo see Trae on Tour at TraeCrowder.comDrewMorganComedy.com 

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion. Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie. I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say. Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year?

Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better. and it's called Rocket Money.

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I used Rocket Money and realized that I had apparently been paying for two different language learning services that I just wasn't using. So I was probably like, I should know Spanish. I'll learn Spanish. and I've just been paying to learn Spanish without practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that.

Also, a fun one, I'd said it before, but I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friend's faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got, I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton, Alice,

and Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the cue ball-looking twin fellas. Yeah. So that was money. What was that a reply gift for? Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid.

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Go to RocketMoney. dot com slash well read today that's rocket money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast they're the what's up well red nation it is me diamond drew Morgan not really he retired so did regular Drew Morgan, but I do want to talk to you about a legal case because regular Drew Morgan actually just unretired. I unretired my law license to work on a very special to me legal case. A friend of Andy's, a woman she grew up with, lost their family home, and it is one of the weirdest, saddest, most evil combinations of government overreach and corporate evil that

I've ever seen. I'm working on it right now. Long story short, this woman's grandmother and My mother died basically back to back, unfortunately, and the county sold her family home, saying that they hadn't paid the taxes. This was a lie. She went to court. This was a few years ago, proved that it was a lie, but when that was all over with, the mortgage company said, oh, that's cool. Since you made us go to court, you owe us all the money right now, not monthly payments.

This is about the time I got involved. I've gotten the number down since the initial conversation that I had with them, and I am fighting them and I do plan to win but I need your help. At some point a bill of some sort is going to come due in the next 30 days. We're going to have to pay it to get the mortgage sort of turned back on and I'm hoping you guys can help me. We're taking on the bank and the government. Everybody I know in America hates at least one of those. So if you can help me out, I know that everyone's hurting right now. If you can help this family out, I would appreciate it. $1, $5, $100, $1,000, $1,000, $1,000, whatever you got, that'd be great. That'd be great.

I've shared the go-fummy on my Twitter. I asked Corey to reshare it. If you're not on Twitter, you can hit me up wherever you follow me and say, hey, where's that go-fumby? And then I'll send it to you. And then you'll send them money, and we're going to beat the bank. We're going to beat the county. I mean, again, what's more American than beating the bank in the county?

Nothing. So please help us out. Thank you so much. You got rights! They're the liberal risks. They care way too much, but don't give a fun. Next step makes some people. People upset, but they got three big old dicks that you can suck.

Hey, what's going on? It's the well-read podcast. It's your boy, Corey Rahn Forster. I'm joined, as always. Trey Crowder, Drew Morgan. Trey, we were just talking before we started about COVID and stuff. Does Katie have the brain fog? Is that a thing?

Katie perpetually brain fog. Yeah, right. Which I think she would have met herself. She's a very like scatterbrained person. I mean, she's on, she got ADHD. and own meds for it and has been for as long as I've known her, basically. So that's hard to say. Like she typed it's like, you know, where's my phone and it's in her hand type shit?

Like she's very much a, what do they call them a hot mess mom? Yes. She's a hot mess mom archetype to the core. Well, that's kind of been my. But Katie has a lot of lingering COVID things going on, though, that's really annoying her. she's got still like real bad congestion stuff like that and also she totally smell blind which don't hit for me because like she can't appreciate my farts and all that good you know yeah right that don't hit more well see she can't smell nothing at all i didn't i luckily i didn't get

any of those and those are the symptoms that i was like the most worried about but like all the lingering lingering covid stuff like that's pretty much just how i am like that's how i function like I've got a hack up coughing all the time because of my allergies and like brain fog. It's like, I'm probably the most ADD motherfucker that, like I should be on pills for it. I just didn't like the pills for it. So I just live with it.

I don't know, man. Like, I mean, I'm pretty scattered and I don't know if you guys remember, but leading up to the special. I got COVID in October. We recorded in December.

I was having to like take note cards on stage with me. And I've never looked at notes on stage ever. It was weird. and it was only specific things. I didn't feel scatterbrained. It just was like my memory didn't hit and it was confusing. There were moments on stage where I was like, not like what's the next line of the joke,

but literally what did I just say? Right. Like what am I even doing up here? Yeah. What minute am I in? Yeah. Yeah, I'm sort of worried about that going forward. But I am back healthy.

I'm back now as far as that goes. and it makes you feel better. Long COVID was about three or four months for me. Really? Fuck. Well, I am back now feeling good. And since we're up top plugging stuff, if you haven't already,

go listen to last night's weekly skews because I co-hosted which you boy, Trey Crowder. We've also got to put it on airs podcast. I'm at Corey Wrightsfor-you.com. Boy's telling about all your stuff where they can find you. Well, you already covered skews. You can support me on Patreon if you want to. skews tier on there. Also,

there's a tier that covers everything. And I do a bunch of different shit on there, so you can do that if you want to. And, um, I don't know, brief, nah,

I'm even going to call it out. It's not a high. I'm touring right now, doing solo shows. You go to tricrouter.com and, uh, get you tickets. And,

uh, we're going to be adding both solo shows and well red shows coming up soon. So just keep an eye on the web sites and come and see us. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, I have a new podcast. We have officially retired into the Abisket,

but DJ and I will move forward with our new co-host, Carmen Morales. Hey. That's exciting. And I think people who listen to both, this would be the first time you heard it. We sort of, an end of the Abisket style, killed the podcast last week and told everybody nothing. Like had a Viking.

Oh, I thought you were going to say you gave it like a Viking funeral or something. No, we just said what goes on top of the biscuit. Come back next week. to find out. It's gravy baby. The new podcast is called Gravy Baby, and me and Carmen Morales are going to be doing it locally, you know, together in theory, hopefully with piping DJ in over the worldwide webs. I'm pumped about that. You can go to Drew Morgan Comedy.com for dates. DJ and I are going to be in Bristol, Tennessee at the end of September. But I'm doing a festival, but I think it's sold out in August. And then that's kind of it for me for August. So it's not until September that I'll be back. out there. What's the new podcast about? All things gravy, baby.

And by that, I mean, what we decided is that there's a lot of podcasts out there, skews for one of them, where you can get your meat and potatoes. Don't come to us for sustenance. It's all gravy, baby. We have decided DJ and I that we are tired of talking about the end of the world. We're tired of talking about how Ukraine is going to end up in World War III. We're tired of talking about how the Democrats have the better ideas and even their ideas aren't great plus they don't execute them we're tired of talking about anything sad it's all gravy baby if we're going to melt on a burning planet while the two parties pretend to care about us and

don't we might as well party at the end of the world that's what it's all about well you heard it here first folks drew morgan has given up the good fight and we welcome you to our side because me and tray also have that is what putting on airs is all about it's all about fun and not about the end of the world it's funny you're talking about not want to talk about bad stuff I uh you know, I still do all my political shit, obviously. And yesterday, the Democrats passed an actual, they did an actual thing, which is really weird for them. Yeah. And it was like, it's the biggest environmental package, the U.S. is ever, which is that's a very low bar and it's not saying much. But still, like, climate scientists and climate people are very happy about it and

all that, which is pretty much all I need to see. And there's some other good stuff inside it, too. Although, of course, I agree that it ain't good enough. Anyway, it's generally good news, is my point. It happened on a Sunday, and I was like, yesterday was Sunday. So I was like, all right,

I'm not going to do a video on a Sunday, but like, dude, they're still going to be talking about and arguing about this shit and everything tomorrow, Monday. Like,

when I get up tomorrow, there's going to be, the Republicans are going to be fired up, bitching about it, some shit's going to be going down. I'll make a video then, you know, cover it down.

I got up this morning and looked, and it's all just about Trump's to, it's like, Trump's to pay is trending. And like, some new, article, not a fucking word, not a word about this like marginally good news from the weekend. And it's all just shit about how it's all just, there's a new New Yorker article where Trump is

quoted as like being upset that his generals were not more like Hitler's generals and how like, like literally, he's like, won't you all be more like, they loved Hitler. They, you know, they never would have said this shit to Hitler. And that's funny, but it's just, it's all that. And also, of course, the nation's in mourning because fucking Pete and Kim broke up or whatever. You know, Kanye tweeted skeet, Davidson is dead or something, which that's hilarious. I did think that was very funny.

But like, it just, positive stuff does not stay in the news soccer. It ain't got no legs, right, at all. Nobody wants to fucking. If it didn't actually have legs, it would play better because that would suck. You know what I'm saying? It would be sad. Yeah, right. Well, that's, yeah.

Yeah. I mean, that's exactly what DJ said. That's exactly what DJ said. That's exactly what DJ said. He was like, all this social media is is negativity. I don't want to have to it anymore. Yeah. No, I mean, I respect it.

I'm with you, man. Like, there's a huge difference in, like, deciding I'm not going to stay informed anymore. And I'm not going to just lather myself with negativity all the time, which, like, I feel like, I feel like I can get, like, every now and then I'll do this thing where on Twitter, I'll go block. and I'll mute a bunch of words just for like 15 or 20 days so that my feed doesn't like I'll just, you know, mute Trump, mute Republican, mute Democrat, just so I can have a cleanse for like 15 days. And I'll always forget like seven days into it and just be like, man, things seem to be all right. You know what I mean? But then I'm like, okay, dude, there is a difference in like not making yourself miserable every day and completely not being informed. And you've got to find the right balance between the two.

but it's pretty difficult on a website that is literally geared to getting you to refresh and keep going and keep going and keep going, you know. Yeah. Well, I will say too in response to that, your boy is still going to be doing me apart from the podcast. But DJ and I, we talked about that too. For those of you who remember when Carmen co-hosted well read for me when the boys were in Europe, you're going to enjoy it. She's fun. As you know, she keeps you on jokes. That's just like her style.

DJ and I tried to go away from. doomsday type stuff. We did a whole, like six months on Q and on. Like, we had people on there talking about Q&O and on how it came to be. It was fun, but it like got real dark and hard. And after that, we were like, let's focus on storytelling. And we tried. And we did a good job of focusing on how stories are created, how stories and culture affect things,

but it still kept coming back to Doomsday shit. And then we were like, we need somebody else. Somebody else has to be driving this fucking boat. because we both want to drive it into a mountain right now. Yeah, and Carmen's pretty perfect for that. Exactly. And then also, me and her just had so much fun doing the well-read thing while y'all were gone. So I was like, let's keep this going.

So anyway, yeah, I think what you said is totally true, Corey. My move has just been get off Twitter for the most part. I still use it to promote, but I don't scroll on there anymore. I've done a good job. Unfortunately, and I don't know if it's the algorithm picking up. on me and my new attempt to be happy, or if it's just the boomers or whoever, Gen Xers figuring it out, Instagram has become very political all of a sudden. And it's all the sudden for me.

Perhaps it's always been that way, but I've never used it for politics. And I've been posting more political jokes. I had a mask video go viral on there. So perhaps the algorithm is like, oh, you like politics. Right. Here, bitch. I don't know which one it is. But that's the app I've been on.

And lately I've been like, they've been fighting in my comments. I've never had that. Now I've got people fighting in my comments on Instagram. So, you know, everything sucks. Well, I saw the dude that runs Instagram or whatever talking the other day about how Instagram has shifted to being more of a video platform. And a lot of people are upset about it because they're like, look, you know, I'm not saying that people shouldn't be able to be political or whatever. but like this app used to be where I saw pictures of people's grandbabies and their kids. It was pictures.

And now it's mostly videos. And like, I didn't come here for videos. Like this started for pictures. And they were like, look, you know, obviously there's still going to be pictures, but we are moving more towards video. And I guess just like what we were saying, like negativity gets more play than positivity. Well, there's nothing more negative than politics. So political videos probably have a, you know, pretty good chance over there.

Yeah. I mean fucking, well, no, not for me. Not on Instagram. It's funny. It's like it was the opposite thing for me. I didn't even, that was the picture platform. That's how I understood it. Right.

That's what that's for is for pictures. I don't fuck with pictures. I don't take pictures. I don't think in pictures. I don't give a fuck about pictures. I don't everyone see a picture of fucking nothing ever fuck pictures. Don't give a shit. And so.

Especially ones of dogs. Especially ones of dogs. Anybody's dog, anybody's baby, anybody's lunch. I don't give a fuck about nothing. Somebody else's kid. Yeah, anyway. And you ain't allowed to put dead dogs on there. It's bullshit.

So I felt very comfortable not being on Instagram. And, you know, when I first went viral and stuff and our agents, everybody was like, you've got to be on Instagram. And I was like, wow, I'm not going to take pictures. I don't fucking like pictures, you know. And then they're like, yeah, well, it's not just pictures. And then, and so, like, I'm on there. That's why I'm the official Trey Crowder on there is because it took me so long to get on there.

Somebody scooped my regular name. But all I do is just post the same shit. I post everywhere on to Instagram. So it's political shit. And I'll tell you what, Corey, it ain't exactly set the woods on fire over there in the Instagram world. But on the note of what we're talking about, anytime on the rare occasions that I've like tried to talk about something positive in a video,

like this one would have been if that had happened on a Monday and I'd actually done a video about it or something, anytime the videos are at all positive or hopeful, they don't never play like the ones where I'm fucking, matter than hell about everything being terrible. You know, those always do so much better. And people who fuck with me will say things like, I have so much bad news, I would like some good news every once in a while.

But yet, and I'm not, the people that may not be the same people that don't watch the happy videos. But what I'm saying is like, that just ain't, that ain't what the numbers bear out. You know what I mean?

Like people, they don't, you know. So the podcast is doomed. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Well, The podcast is different than like clips. Like, you know, clips to fucking whatever.

I think people would rather listen to an hour straight of positivity than listen to an hour straight of negative horseshit, I think. And I'm sure we'll get negative from time to time. But what Carmen provides is just constant one-liners and just like comic relief. And then that makes me want to get into the one-liner mode. Like, I'm so much funnier or something beside Carmen than when it's just me and DJ. So I don't, you know, I think the people who already live, listen to us, it'll be fine. Now, whether or not we can use clips to gain any new followers being positive and funny, we'll see. Yeah. Yeah. I also like, but I'm in an echo chamber,

and like Corey is too, like, meaning there may be plenty of people out there who desperately want nothing but that type of thing, but they're not, because of that, they ain't fucking with me to begin with. And the people that are fucking with me, you know, want me to be mad about everything all the time, which is fine. It's the bad I've made for myself. Well, if you think my smaller platform old dog ass has some sort of line on getting those

people to follow them. Well, no, I know. I mean, me and Corey, it's like Corey said, well, me and Corey are trying to do the same, we're aiming for the same people, these mythical, hypothetical people who are just happy about shit all the time and not depressing and fucking whatever else.

But anyway, with putting on airs because it's not at all political either, and it's supposed to be like just silly and just a good time. And we also don't know how to do that. So I guess we can all just not, I guess we can all just not know how to do that together. I think, and I hope if something breaks free.

I think a lot of the people listen right now, I mean, we've got away from politics a lot on my red, not entirely. And we don't get too domy and gloomy. We do, but we cut jokes about it. I mean, again, Carmen is more cynical than me.

It's just going to be more a fun approach to it. So I think people listening right now get what you mean. I think it's more going viral with videos, which I think was your point about, well, a podcast is different. And also we got a huge positive response to Bubba, which we are going to bring back for season two.

I got some cool ideas for it. But anyway, we got a huge response to Bubba Shuck the podcast. So, like, I think that, you know. Drew's dropping all sorts of news on us today. How about this? Well, we talked about this privately when you might not have seen that email. Joe,

I'm not having a job. I'm going to be reading emails. That's true. But we did talk about that privately and an email with Catherine. Well, let's either continue that or talk about something else right after this. And we're back, everybody. Hope you enjoyed that ad or that nothing at all, depending on where you're watching this at. Just that fancy little sound show skewed up on the board.

There. I wasn't ready. I'm an idiot. If y'all walked into a doctor's office and they had a big ass painting on the wall of a doctor, let's say this is like an oral surgeon's office. I mean like a glamour photo? No, it's a painting. But it's a painting of a doctor in theater, you know, which is what they call it, like,

in surgery. Oh, yeah. So it's a doctor in surgery over somebody's face, like that, you know, digging in their mouth, doing what they do. and beside the doctor with his hand on his shoulder. Jesus? Glowing white Jesus. Yes.

No, wouldn't hit for me. Yeah, right. Would you like leave? How would you react? I mean, I went like in the south. I feel like, because I saw there was,

somebody had that happen to them. And it actually was an ophthalmologist, I think. So it would be more like my doctor who did surgery on my eyes having one of those. And I'm sure it wouldn't have for me. But somebody posted one of those on Reddit and went to the front page. I thought I'd ask you all. about it. I feel like Southern doctors,

you can run into that sort of thing. Yeah, for, whatever, for, I've seen it, those pictures, like, posted around on the internet.

I've never seen it at the doctor's office. Now, it wouldn't surprise me if I saw it where I'm from. But let me, let me tell you, let me tell you what I want a doctor, okay? I want a doctor who is willing to take

both the credit and the blame for what he's doing. I want him, right. No, no, this ain't fucking Jesus. This is me. I'm fucking God. I'm the healer.

I'm the one. That's exactly what I want. Because I'm not convinced that a doctor that's like, well, realistically, Jesus is the surgeon here, won't just like let some fundamental shit about doctoring be set to the side. I'm not trying to let Jesus take the will when the will is my tumor. No. You know what I mean? Also, like, and I also someone else point out, like Jesus, it's like Jesus standing there going like, you really going to cut that cancer out?

I put that in him for a reason, you know. Hey, for me. Cancer? Like, yeah, right. Like, I put that there. You want to talk to me about this where you just decided to cut that cancer out? You know, it's like God and Jesus is one killing everybody with stuff. And I'm fine with...

Why would they help doctors, you know, undo that? I'm okay with a doctor being a man of faith. Like, I'm not going to sit there and say, like, I only want an atheist doctor. I mean, I would prefer it. But I'm saying, like, I don't think that being a Christian would make you any less of a good doctor, but I do think that you need that. Like, it's sort of a separation of church and state thing for me when it's like, look in here, it's medical, it's science, and whatever.

I thought most doctors were egomaniacs, like that was part of surgeons, especially. I thought surgeons had a huge overlap with being megalomaniacal. And I feel like, so it's got to be rare for them to just give it up to the Lord. Exactly. Because then he gets the credit. Right. Well, I want my surgeons to be the way Corey described, I think, which is especially like sociopaths who just aren't interested in hurting people who are just more interested in like being worshipped or whatever. And yeah, that's what I want out of a surgeon.

Out of a doctor, I do think you want a lot more empathy than that type of person's able to give you. I've seen that picture in doctor's offices. You know, I always kind of probably chalked it up to the nurses. You know, you see the nurses more, blah, blah, blah. You're at like a community, you know, not like super poor people clinic, but I went to like the medium poor people clinic growing up and I saw stuff like that. I saw a lot of crosses on the wall. I guess my thing with it is if it's hard, if it's a hard,

thing to figure out or it's new like COVID. Yeah, you don't want someone being like, well, I'm not sure. Let's all pray together. It's like, man, no, I want you to like work a little harder. Get on the internet there. Do you know what that is, Dr. Jim? And see what new stuff has come out about these symptoms or whatever. So yeah, I'm not, I guess growing up where I grew up, it's like, well, how do you avoid it to some extent? And then when, you know, culture changed a little bit and all the grants to work for poor people came in where they pay all your medical debt off if you did that. Every doctor we had was an Indian. And, you know, from far as I know, they worshipped a cow, which didn't hit for me. Maybe they didn't know. Maybe they were atheist. And that's why they came to

America to be doctors just to, you know, save people and get pussy. But I just feel like it's a problem when things get tough. Surely anyone can separate their face from their job. But what do you do and you don't know what to do. I want a doctor who relies too heavily on himself or science in that moment. I know that it wouldn't hit for me, which I know it was not shocking, given everything about me, but like a much lesser version of that one time, we were, I don't remember where we were. I feel like it was Indianapolis or somewhere,

but I had gotten a cab from the airport to our hotel downtown and on the way a fucking, a, like, it was like a log truck. You remember Final Destination when that log truck? Yeah, yeah, when it comes through the back. Yeah. Every time you're behind one of those. It was, it was like a fucking micro machines version of that.

It was like a regular flatbed truck that just had some like posts on it. Right. But they're still probably, I mean, they're fucking, you know, they're three, four inches around and 10 feet long, eight feet long. whatever and they're on the back of this flatbed truck and the truck's right in front of us and this ain't an official operation. Of course not. It's just some old boy driving. Somebody going to the dump.

Yeah. Yeah, right. Exactly. And it all just fucking comes off the truck, right? Like on to the highway in front of us. And my driver was a like, uh, an African immigrant of some kind. I'm too, I'm frankly too Africa dumb to know like like I think it, he might have been Nigerian. Yeah.

Yeah, I too am Africa dumb. Sorry. You know, I'm going to be insensitive. I'm just Africa dumb as most whites are. But he was some kind of African immigrant. And he fucking, you know, he swirred. We're both clearly freaking out, but he swirved. He gets around it.

He navigates the situation. Nothing bad happens. Then he like pulls over briefly. And we're both sitting there like breathing hard or whatever. And I was like, dude, fuck. Good job, man. Holy shit. Like, you know, thank you for that or whatever.

And he was like, no, I can't take any crap. that was the Lord. That's who that was. Like, he gave up to the God. And I was like, and immediately I was like, oh,

we'll never fucking mind me. Yeah, I wish we'd have died. Yeah. I was like, I wasn't the fucking Lord. Yeah. Why did the Lord do that?

The Lord tried to kill us with them logs in the first place. So you beat God. You, yeah, if anything, you have bested the Lord just now. You can't give God credit without blaming them. And there's just so much shit to blame them.

Exactly. Exactly. God took the chance for me. Yeah, well, he gave it to an eight-year-old. There you go. And that's the perfect thing. Like, I'm fine with you giving God credit for stuff, but you're right. You know what I'm saying?

Like, he also did the bad things. And in my opinion, actually, no, no, fuck my opinion. It is true. There have been way more terrible things that have happened than there have been really good things that have happened. So his fucking record is like Cleveland Brown's early 2000 shit. You know what I mean? Yeah, you just remind me. joke I had. Do you remember those t-shirts that said, God hates Cleveland about the Browns?

I used to have a joke because I was like, what if he does? Like, what if he had a girlfriend in Cleveland in the 60s? And she broke his heart, started fucking Jim Brown. And he was like, well, that's it. Fuck this franchise forever. It would make sense. Then Jim Brown presumably started beating a shit out of that lady. And God was like, hey, he's all right.

I forgot about that. I'll give him five more rushing titles. That's what I'll do. I forgot he did that. And for two seconds, I didn't remember he did that. You're just throwing shit. Oh, yeah, he did do that. No, he did.

He did. He very much did that shit. He very much did. I wanted to say real quick, Andy worked for a doctor who was God-like. He had a real complex. And he was a nightmare and a saint. He had a God complex or he was God-like and that he liked God.

He had a God complex. Yeah, yeah. That hits. He was, like, really intense and very literal. He was probably on the spectrum. But he was also an asshole. Those two things are separate, but as a combination,

to deal with. And there were patients who, like, no one else could fix them. And he was so into fixing stuff and figuring out the problem that he got him fixed. But then there were other patients if he just decided he didn't like them. Apparently he would do wild shit. Like, he would say stuff to Andy like, yeah, I'm giving him a little bit too much of this medicine because they're kind of, yeah, because they're like loud and this will calm them down. Right.

So, like, yeah, that's fine. That's a dangerous. Nah, he was fucking people's lives up. but he was also like saving other people and then like people like if you were just giving them a little bit more of a sedative so they'll go to sleep it's like well i kind of want to be sedated at the day i thought you meant like he was sewing their bones on wrong no no i mean prescribing them well i meant i meant prescribing them things but he was also doing things like if the mom of a kid because he had a lot of children patients annoyed him he would just tell andy to tell him he don't take their insurance anymore which was a lie and they were the he was the only doctor who could figure it out. So, like, he was truly a godlike complex person where it was like, yeah, I got to fix this. But if I decide that you're not worthy of me, you're out. Andy broke all kinds of laws.

Andy broke all kinds of laws. I'm not allowed to talk about, like, giving people free prescriptions and shit. So that's like, that's like genuinely one of the most accurate God complexes I've ever heard. Like, not only am I the award winning. They won awards and shit for being like a good doctor. I'd still rather have him than Mr. Jesus take the will, motherfucker. I'd just do my best, I guess, hit for this guy,

so he didn't try to, like, spike my insulin or whatever the fuck he was doing. Yeah. Yeah. Lord don't hit. No, Lord don't hit. I think the lesson is God don't hit, whether it's God or someone who thinks their God. I had a thing I've been wanting to talk about. I was going to bring up last week.

It's outdated now. And also, that's okay. it's like cancel culture ancillary or tangential and so you know

I don't have a huge interest in those things but I still want to talk about this one because we were threading about it so the reason I bring it up

today is because something reminded me of it last night so people might know you know Beyonce put a new album out and then immediately got

blogged about and Twitter stormed for using the word spas saying spazzing on that ass which is like you know not the height of lyrical fronity uh to begin with i've never i haven't heard the song but is it is some version of like spazz it on that ass spas spas it on that like is that i don't know probably yeah right anyway you know it's not fucking um uh Leonard Cohen or whatever but but uh but um but um But this lady, this blogger was like, you know, I guess Beyonce somehow missed the fact that I already went through this whole process with Lizzo a couple of months ago. Because Lizzo had also used the word spas in a song.

And so I must regrettably inform Queen Bee the same way that I did Lizzo that spaz is a slur derived from the word spastic and aimed at. people with neurological disorders like cerebral palsy, which I have, right? And Lizzo changed her lyric and I'm henceforth demanding that Beyonce do the same. And we were like, in the thread, we were like, this is one of those

things we're just one person's piss and nobody gives the fuck? But at that point in time, if you googled Beyonce, because I did, literally every single result that came up was some different version of an article about this whole thing and how it happened and whatnot. And I didn't know or realize at the time, and

came out a little bit later that day, also in the thread, that this blogger lady is Australian, right? Ah. And the pull thickens. Spaz, apparently, is legitimately like a slur that is used in Australia in that way. And last night, me and Katie were watching, me and Katie been watching this Australian show that I'm not necessarily going to recommend. It's like,

what is it? It's good and bad at the same time. It's called glitch. It's about people to come back from the dead. It's, you know, Katie wanted to watch it. Anyway,

but not zombie. They don't eat brains and shit. Don't have it. It's fucking wild. Anyway, whatever. We'll watch this Australian show. Me and Kay talked about that whole thing

when it happened. Last night in an episode of the Australian show, we watched this girl came back from the dead who died in the 80s, so she's a little less cooth than some of the other ones, right? She's from the 80s. There's a dude in a, a wheelchair who had a brain injury, right? She interacts with him and she's like, now he's a fucking spas in a wheelchair, you know.

And me and Katie were like, oh, that's it. That's fucking there that is. And I was like, but I don't think, I don't think that an American would ever say that. No. Not because we're better than that. Dude, no. Because that word doesn't exist in that context in this country. And both Lizzo and Beyonce are Americans.

I don't understand why that wasn't the end of the whole thing where it's like, it's a slur here. Okay, well, it's not there where they live. So let's just move on because context should mean something. And they're American. So clearly they don't mean it the way that you interpret it.

Yeah. So who gives the fuck really? Right. Well, I bet Beyonce does because she's international. You know what I mean? Well, so is Lizzo. You know,

I mean, that's fair. Global artists. And she did change it. But like, but for that lady's perspective, first of all, let me say, I hope you're right. I hope we're a riot.

It's not like lizard people where we get learned that, nope, this thing is bad. It's been bad. It's bad all over. I hope it's never been. I was going to say, I feel like if we didn't know a slur, then it can't possibly be able to me. Yeah, I'm sure. Right. I don't know, though, dude.

I remember one time I was having a conversation with Elliot Ray Hall, our buddy, who's a comic writer, and he grew up in Chicago. And somehow, he was talking about his uncle talking about something. And I genuinely don't remember. He was like, yeah, my uncle was on about this, that. And he said something. I was like, what's that man? He was like, it's like a slur for like Mexicans or something like that. And he was like, you guys don't have that?

And I was like, no, we mostly stick to the classics, I think, like down here. But I'm saying he had, there was regional slurs that exist that we didn't know about. But like Spaz, spas is a word that I've heard people in America say. But when you say it about like a nerd or like a nerd. Orky kid or something. He's like he's a total spas. He's a total lameo. It doesn't have anything to do with,

it doesn't have anything to do with like a brain disorder. No, like the way. I'm saying, I hope you're right in its origin. Because lizard people didn't have nothing to do with Jews when we talked about it. Lee Baines has a song out that he just put out called lizard people. And he's being learned the same way we were learned. So like, you know what I mean?

Well, but I'm just saying, I want to say, though. go ahead well the only the way if someone said how would you use the word spas I would have said it's like when you when you see someone walk through a spider web and then freak out and then hit their head on a tree or something they spazzed out but I wouldn't that's not me going they had a brief moment of cerebral palsy you know what I mean like a cerebral palsy person no they just fucking fazzed out but you did say fall down earlier and I was like wonder and I'm like man what

if we learned anyway I'm just saying I hope that we learn that we are correct that this has never been a slur in America because this is an interesting conversation. I mean, I think Mark brought this up in the thread, but like, cunt is totally acceptable to say in Australia and we can't say it.

But if you're an Australian comedian and you want to make it in America, you're probably not going to say cunt. So, like, I would totally understand Beyonce's perspective of wanting to be an international superstar being like, oh, shit, I don't want to do that. Oh, she wasn't wrong for Texas. taking it out.

But also on the other side, you know, it not getting mentioned in that article. If I'm writing an article and I don't even mention that, this is a my country or my culture-specific situation. Maybe she didn't know, but it seems a bit disingenuous. I cannot believe how perfect it is that we're talking about this. I have something so hilarious to tell you guys and to show you when we're done here. So off my acumen? No, no, no. Like, I'm going to, like, to, like, the bow on this conversation is something that has to be this weekend.

Well, but I, but yeah, you're right. But like most Americans, I feel like, you know, to continue that parallel, if you hear in Australia, it's like, I fucking cunts, you know, like, yeah, we don't go, hey, hey, hold on, buddy. Because it's like, we know they say that and it's like, okay, that's fine. Like, I was watching this British cooking show. I actually sent y'all the clip. And there was this Scottish lady on there. And all the chefs were talking about, like, what's your favorite comfort food? And she goes, I'm sorry, but again, cultural differences.

She was, well, for me, it's fagots and peas, no dough you know. And I was like, the fuck. Yeah. And I looked it up and they got meatballs over there. There's a meatball dish in Scotland called faggots and peas. And like, that's just what that means. Yeah. Cigarettes.

Fags. I heard her say that. Yeah, cigarettes. Two things pap all makes. The English people, cigarettes are fags, you know. And I knew that one, but I didn't know about the meatball. But when I first heard her say that, I knew she wasn't talking about gay people, obviously, because of context. You don't eat them.

But I was like, but I was like, what? And then I googled it and I found out, oh, it's meatballs over there. And I was like, okay, fine. Like, just going from that moment to, but still, no. Yeah, right. Absolutely not. From all the way over here on my side of the Atlantic, I decree that is not okay. Exactly.

I just don't, I just ain't with that, you know. agree with you, but if I opened a Scottish restaurant in America and I named it that, I would have to accept that people would be like, well, this person that we're talking about listened to Beyonce

in Australia, you know, like, I'm not, like, it feels like... But I watched a British show in America. I feel like it's the same... It is, but it's not Beyonce. Well, I just think that the tone probably

definitely should have been... I'm not even trying to like be on the person's side. I'm saying I can understand being like, you shouldn't do that, but I can't understand being like, what the fuck? Where I'm at is, yeah, where I'm at is like, if I'm Beyonce, oh, she's like, okay, it's probably a good PR move for her to be like, you know what, I'm sorry, I won't do that, whatever.

However, had she not, anybody in their right mind would have been like, well, yeah, it's because everything we just said. All right, here we go. I'm going to change it slightly, but I can't believe how on topic it is. And I couldn't wait to tell you all this already. I met a guy, he's now like a buddy of mine. I've met him before and I saw him in Tahoe. He works for one of the resorts.

And the resort is called Palace. Maybe I shouldn't say, everyone's going to figure out where it is by all the context clues. And they changed the name to Palisades last year. Because the name was the Oriental. Squaw Valley. Squaw Valley. Squaw Valley.

Squaw is a slur that white people made up to talk about lady Indians. And apparently I didn't know this. He informed me that through the campaign to change it, it was brought out that. Native Americans. They would specifically, white people would specifically call a large Indian woman. Really? Yeah. Like fat?

Fat. They weren't fat, were they? They were fat. Some of them was fat. I know they had fats. They could be fat. I thought some of them were just big. A lot of corn.

Big bomb. Like, like, strong. Stop. Okay. So. No, like, I just, I didn't know that any of them were ever fat. Listen to this. This gets like, and this gets so funny.

So they decided to change the name, but being a corporation owned by another corporation, owned by another corporation that we live in in, in America, it went up the chain. It came back down. We're changing the name. It was too late to get 3,500 employees new winter gear. especially with the supply chain issues we've been dealing with. So they have 3,500 employees with jackets, backpacks, hats, gloves, et cetera, with that patch or some version of Squaw Valley on it.

They literally bought stickers. Yeah. You want to talk about the most American, like, neo-liberal way to attack racism. They slapped a sticker on the slur on outdoor winter. gear for people who are in snow. They peeled off in half a day. They had like three stickers a piece. They're supposed to last the whole season.

So they're just slapping stickers and patches on it. Didn't work at all, of course, by the end of the season. Yeah. Now, do you want to know? Very, very appropriate for American's general. It's about to get more appropriate. It's about to get more appropriate.

Here's America's general approach to charity and, They had a bunch of gear that was unused that was now useless to them, and they wanted to donate it. But you can't donate it in America. So do you want to know where they sent it? Australia? The Ukraine. The Canadian Indian. To the Ukraine.

To the war-torn Ukrainians who are without home, who's like had their winter coats blown up, so they needed them. So there are Ukrainians wearing a slur on their jazz. It's right now fighting a war that they have no idea the context of that slur. And I was saying to my friend, you know how like the loser of the Super Bowl, we send those t-shirts to Central America and Africa and every once in a while you'll see a picture of like a poor kid in a third world country wearing like a Super Bowl champion shirt of somebody who lost the Super Bowl? That's literally what happened.

But with war, the people who lost the war's gear got sent to the Ukraine. And they don't know. so they're doing the same, like I can't believe how perfect it is. They don't know anything about it, of course, just like, you know, con or whatever. It means nothing to them. They can't read the words, yeah. They're just wearing it around out there.

Well, they certainly can't take the jackets back. I'll tell you that much. Now, I got, also, I don't know when that resort was founded, but I bet Squall Valley was an absolute can't miss at the time. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? It's like, oh, yeah. How many squalls they got in that valley?

Yeah. But it brought in a bunch of whatever, Western, Western fellers. Where the fuck is that? You said Lake Tahoe. Lake Tahoe. And I got the hat. That's another California or Nevada.

It's up Nevada. It's both. No, no, it's both. It's both. Yeah, that's what I thought. I think this one's in California, this particular resort. But Tahoe is in both. Take a quick break.

Come back after this. Can I say before we move on that the reason I have the hat is I wanted to give it to a half Native American friend of mine and he wants it. He was like, yeah, I want that. So, like, that's why I took the memorabilia. I'm not trying to keep it like the Nazi people who, like, I just like the memorabilia.

Hey, I have a, I have just two emails to read if you'd like me to read them real quick, because I think we might get something out of this. Is that cool? Yeah, I was going to, yeah, if you think we'll get something out of it because, I mean, you know, we still got some, uh, some, uh, some, well, and after that we can do some of the people who sent in redneck names. Yes, yes, that one of these is that.

and one of them is my favorite email that we've ever gotten. So first one here is from Lacey Hall. She says, the subject line is redneck names. Just wanted to share some redneck names with you. I grew up in small town USA, Smithfield, Virginia. Home of the ham, baby.

She didn't say that. I put that. Did you check that? It's that same Smithfield? I just know for a fact it is because I know a guy that works there in Big Ham. Okay. Surely there's not two Smithfields in one state. Sure. I went to high school with a guy named James Robert who went by the nickname Jim Bob. That's a classic. There was also a guy whose real name, I don't know, because everybody called him Bubba. Of course, there you go. Growing up across the street, my neighbor was named, nickname Poochie. Everyone in town called him that. I was a teenager before that. I found out his name was actually James. My brother's name is Jack Wayne. Pretty solid. Two first names there. I call him Bubba and so does my sister, but everybody else calls him Jack Wayne. Then I've got my.

great-grandmother named Lily Mae Payton, nicknamed Duckie. Most people called her grandma duckie or aunt duckie. Yada, yada, yada. I've been listening to the podcast it's day one. I also listen to all your other podcasts in this universe. It said sad to hear about Bubba shot the podcast, but hey, fret night, it's coming back.

Shit. I highlighted another thing here in the middle. Well, fuck you. So, yeah. So there's Ducky, John, Jack Wayne, yada, yada, y'all, some solid redneck names. Drew, I'll let you get to yours in a second after I read to you. My favorite email that we've ever gotten. This is from Cole Bauman.

Hey, guys, I happened to stumble across one of Corey's videos on Twitter some months back. I've been listening to Putting on Airs now since episode one. The song y'all used at the end is so damn catchy, by the way. Shout out Lydia Loveless. And just got turned on to the well-read pod. So, hey, dang, ding, ding. new listener. And I'm loving them both. I know y'all get a ton of emails and I probably won't get a response as this probably does not, as this probably seems like a stupid question. But

what does FDDH mean? I heard y'all use it a few times on well-read pod and I think it refers to a morbidly obese person, but would love to know for sure. I hope the buttercream dream is kicking COVID's ass right now and y'all keep doing your thing. I wish you nothing but the best and continued success for you all. I love so much the sincerity in which someone posed the question, what does FDDH mean? And I just wanted to stop here and tell you all that I'm so proud of us for getting our lingo out into the world and officially into the Zite guys. Yes, it stands for fat, dumb and don't hit for everyone needing to know.

Yeah, I thought we, I know that person's a new listener, but didn't we like very recently explain FDH on here. Yeah. They might not have heard the explanation and then just heard us saying FDH. Fat, dumb, and don't hit. Yes, and I would also. You go to like an Applebee's, you know, especially in the Midwest or whatever. Yeah.

You go to Walmart pretty much anywhere. Somebody yelling at a waiter. And FDDH is running around. And we've gotten some blowback of people saying that we were fatphobic or whatever, but I would like to, I would like to enter into the record. Me and Trey both consider ourselves FDDH. We identify. And ain't going to play for them.

Because we're, because we're skinnier now. Yeah, I mean. But I used to be fat. I used to, dude, look, I was a fat kid. And I mean, like, a fat kid. Like, I was a fat kid that by every definition of the, of the fucking term. And like, real fat. made my childhood super not hit being a fat kid ain't it and then in college late high school and in

college i slimmed up a little bit but i've yo-yoed ever since i've been through at least six or seven different fats in my adult life me too and most of y'all have seen them there's video evidence of many of these fats out there on the internet you can find like i know i've been going through old videos of mine for like a sizzle room trying to put together and like the different I've deleted old videos of mine. The different sizes of me is just truly something else. So it's like my weight has been a lifelong thing with me. And I may not, but even at those fats, there would be fatter people who would still be like,

you ain't fat. You can't say it. And I was like, motherfuckerucker, I'm fat. Right. But like now. Just because you're fatter don't mean I'm not fat. Now in a not fat stage, people definitely don't want to hear that shit from you. And I know that's true.

But I don't. It's been my whole entire life. I've spent fucking with this shit. It's like a huge thing for me. And so I'm going to talk about fat and being fat and all that. It's part of my experience. I don't know what to tell you all. Well, there's a difference.

I think it's interesting. It's like me talking about trash for trailer people too. There's a difference between. There's a difference between them not wanting to hear it, which I totally get. And me feeling like I'm allowed to talk about it. If you don't want to hear it, that's fine. But I will be God damned if I get called. fatphobic when I myself have been fat, will be fat again, and still very much internally

identify as an FDDH. That's all I have to say about that. Really looking forward to your future fats. Well, he just fell off the fat. He just fell off the fat wagon this week, I believe, this week. Yeah, one day. But it's going to take more than one day. I want to say real quick, I know.

It's a good start. I think it's interesting. It was great. We're going to get in the weeds. Y'all are just going to talk about how much it don't hit. for you that Corey won't eat. It's all that's about to happen. I want to just say,

it's interesting that we ain't heard anyone defending the dumbs and don't hits. It's interesting that no one's speaking up for these two underrepresented communities in the woke site guys currently. Why is no one standing up for the dumb and don't hits? And I'll tell you why, none of you out there identify as one of them.

But if you are writing fucking three idiots about their podcast because two of them who used to be fat said fat you are one of the don't hits i don't know if you're dumb or not you're expecting a fucking response but you're definitely a don't hit well i think also is that like they don't want me us talking about fat people because we're not fat they believe that we're dumb so they think it's okay for us to say that you know what i'm saying by definition we don't hit we don't hit yeah all right that's fair i definitely nobody like someone that don't hit i think drew is right

It's like no one, you know, no one hears us talking about the dumbs and don't hits and thinks of themselves. Hey, I'm dumb and don't hit. Nobody thinks that. But if you're fat, like, I mean, you know you're fat. Like me, I 100% think I'm thinner right now than I've been in many, many, many years and I still feel pretty fucking fat. Me too. If you fat, you know you fat. But if you're dumb and don't hit, that's part of being dumb.

and not hit and you don't know that you dumb and don't hit. Dunning Curator, right? We're going to hear from one or two old boys who listen. I know you're out there just going, boy, don't be honest with you. I don't have you know, I'm dumb and I don't hit. And I love y'all. Yeah, right. Yeah.

I'm a truck driver. I listen to y'all. I tell you something. I had a slurper in my hand when you said it. Yeah. All right. The winner for me in my heart for the redneck name. maybe because it's a kid

Sarah Wofford from Arkansas wrote in and someone that she knows has a student a child you want to talk about a future fat dumb

don't hit whose name is I'm just calling it like I see it Joe yeah unless he's gay he don't stand a chance and even then it's 50-50

his name his on his birth certificate Christian name is trucker Oh, yeah. You know what? You probably can't say a kid's name on a podcast.

Oh, yeah. You might not be able to. You're probably right. I mean, mark that out at 50 minutes. All right. So bleep out the last name and you guys trust us. Trucker's last name is not what you would expect, but very rare. It's a natural disaster.

We could say that. His name is Trucker Natural Disaster. It's like, it's literally like. Hell, I didn't mean to do that. It's like a redneck character. in an anime or something. Yeah, yeah. That sounds like to me.

You know what I mean? Because it's so insane. It's like they just pick two words that, like, represent a region in their minds and then name the character that is. Like how Donkey Kong, like, an Asian translation they fucked up. They were trying to do Monkey King or something like. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. They just roll with it. Donkey Kong does hit, though. It does hit. It's going to be a bad. Like, as a kid, I never even questioned. question that shit. I was just like, yeah, it's donkey con.

That's donkey con. Yeah, it hits. Speaking of being fat, my sandwich got here five minutes ago, and I can't stand it. I'm just going to go get it and mute myself and chime in when I need to. I'll be right back eating a sandwich. What kind of sandwich? I got two. I'm just going to eat some of one and some of the other and let Andy have whatever she is.

That's what's up. Show how often you be making sandwiches? Every day. Yeah, I figured you was going to say that. Without, I mean, every single day. Probably you two a day. I knew you were going to say that. See, I don't.

Why? I've never, I never, what, do you make sandwiches on just sliced bread, like white or weed or whatever you got? Yeah, my keto bread. Yeah. Okay. Because I, sandwiches were always like a, I'd go, I'd get like some rolls, like French rolls or something, like sub rolls or something. And make sandwiches while I had those is almost like a treat. But otherwise, I never really fucked with sandwiches as an adult.

and I, you mean like making them yourself. Yeah. I love ordering a sandwich. Yeah, I was about to say, but for you, it's like I'm not patient enough to sit here and make this. I'd rather just shovel all the ingredients into my fat fucking face. No, it's more like I just always in my head felt like, and I'm saying now that I was wrong about this, but those types of sandwiches, the types between two sliced pieces of white or wheat bread or whatever you got. I know.

In my head, I was like, that's like middle school shit. Yeah, right, right, right. As an adult, if you're going to eat a sandwich, you eat like a sub. And I don't always have sub shit, so I don't have them very often. But recently, I made some sandwiches with just like just turkey and or ham and dejon mustard and shit. No mayonnaise, no cheese because I'm, you know, trying to be less fat. But I did that because it was one of the only things I had in the house at the time that, like, I could eat. Yeah, right.

And I also had some lettuce and some tomato, right? And so I put that on there. And I was, and again, it had some good, Dejan mustard is my shit. But anyway, I put all that together and I was eating it. And I was like, God damn, this fucking slaps. This motherfucker goes. Like, I've been sleeping on these types of sandwiches.

I've made so many because I have children. Kids, right. I made so many. But obviously the one I made was beefed up much hitter version. Yeah, of course. But like, but yeah, I've just been sleeping on those. And I don't know if it's because you're so childlike or whatever. But in my head, in my head when I was processing all this mentally, I was like, I bet show fucking smash your sandwiches.

I was like, I bet he eats sandwiches like this all goddamn day. But the non-child part of it is that like I actually make them myself. You know what I mean? It's not like I'm getting hammer to make me sandwiches. But oh, dude, like that is actually like sandwiches is a huge staple of my health journey. Because now that I've discovered keto bread and stuff like that, it's like a thing I can make that's not really that bad for me. I'll tell you about one of the hit in the sandwiches, though,

I've made in a very, very long time. And this is, I was on a fat the other night. As I texted y'all, I was eating chips. I was eating cookies. I was eating fucking cupcakes. I was going in. Well, right before I went to bed, I got a craving for a sandwich.

And, like, normally you'd think, oh, you're stoned, you're drunk. That means you just went in there and threw some stuff together. No, no, no, no, no. I went in there, boiled eggs, made a super hitting fucking like egg salad, right? Buttered the bread, toasted the bread, smeared the egg salad on it,

and then as a condiment, jalapeno raspberry jelly on top of that, ooh, ooh, we, son. It was fucking fantastic. But yeah, I mean, I stay eating sandwiches. Like, let me change your life, too. You ever eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toasted bread? Yeah, of course.

Okay. Well, all right. Well, I don't know because you'd be saying, you don't eat sandwich. You toast them in it. Well, again, I got kids. Peanutbird. But also, but, like, you can't let them have that shit too much because then they won't want to

regular. You know what I mean? Exactly. And it's like, now that, now we know that's a thing. And you can't just let them be knowing that stuff. But, like, you definitely got to deprive kids of a lot of stuff for that reason. You're talking about in a toaster oven? Are you talking about, like, a grilled cheese style?

Either way. I've done both. They both hit. Yeah, I've done both. And they both do hit. But, yeah, no, I eat, like, I eat a turkey sandwich every day. Because like I said, with that keto bread, like it's not even like a cheat. Like it's good to put the turkey on there, a little bit of cheese, some light.

I'm on light mayonnaise. I know a lot of people are going to take my red creed away from me immediately. But yeah, yeah, see, that's real right there. That's the real man. That's my backup. I don't know if you all picked up on this, but I ran out. By the way, if you're only listening, watch this segment. The whole time they're talking about eating sandwiches, I'm eating a sandwich.

Yeah. right before I started this diet I'm currently on I bought a big old thing of dukes and ain't been able to fuck with it which is so sad because you know it's the best yeah so it's just sitting in my fridge but I also bought again and I knew that dejon mustard hit but dejon mustard has been my main crutch uh giving me through it because it's like you know it's healthy but also just hits real hard so like I can I can make do without mayonnaise which I never ever thought I would say, but I'm doing it. You can't live without sauce. I'm such a huge cheese guy. I ain't been fucking with cheese. You even fucking with cheese? No, I can't fuck without sauce.

I'm not. Shout out to all musters do. I cannot live without a sauce. And the fact, the day I found out mustard was good for you. I was like, what? Oh, yeah. Yeah, dude, mustard. I've definitely used a lot more mustard in the past like year because of that.

Because it's like, oh, wait, I can just put a little bit more of this on there and it's fine. Well, all the witches, like, Andy. like Andy's type of wish. Apparently it reduces inflammation too, they'd be saying. Really? Yeah. I would have thought that it, I just figured that it would make it worse just because it hits.

Like mustard's one of the rare things that like hits and is fine. Like usually if something hits, it's like, yeah, and you can't have it. You know what I know? Do you remember Stan? garlic. There was this farmer. Hits for you. That's true.

There was a farmer in Maribel that we knew who also played music. That's how we met him. His name was Stan. and he dated a few girls we were staying out with. He was a mustard farmer, and he'd talk to you about it all night long. He was super into it. I think he did garlic, too.

There's a few of those things where it's like, I don't, this ain't real. Like, there's got to be a downside. Those people who live forever on that island in Greece, they ate a lot of garlic. What island is that? There's an island in Greece where they have a, something of living.

What's the word I'm looking for? They live longer? Standard. The average age of death is like, life expectancy. Life expectancy. Their life expectancy, thank you, is like, it's like 94. And so people have gone, yeah, people have gone there to study how they live a lot. And they eat garlic, they drink red wine, they eat yogurt that's organic, they swim a lot.

You say it, you say it don't hit, Trey, but I have to assume that like a healthy 94 feels like our unhealthy 72. Yeah, yeah, they also have, they also have less disease, less Alzheimer's. It's all that, you know what I mean? because I've always said kill me young because I know what it's going to be like old not because of the show. Oh dude, it's going to be fucking, it's going to be rough, man.

Like, yeah, anybody listening, if I ever start showing signs of going down, just put a pillar over my fucking face. Oh, yeah. I don't want to deal with it. Me and you have that pack. I hope you get old. Yeah, my head has stayed.

My head has not only stayed the same size, but it obviously looks way bigger now because of proportions. Like, I saw a picture of me the other day, And, dude, I swear to God, I had to look for like 30 seconds at this picture, be like, did I get high in Photoshop? Did I make my head bigger? Because it's just sitting up there like a fucking Biblehead, not hitting.

Well, I say to send us off show. All right. Thank you all for listening to the well-read show. We'd love to stick around longer, but we got to go. And tune in next week if you got nothing to do. Thank you, God bless you. Corey, do you like fancy shit? Do you mean like endless shrimp at Red Lobster?

No, a little higher. Do you mean like buying a dog as opposed to just find him one in a box at a Walmart parking lot? Even fancier. Do you mean like them real long-ass cigarettes? Buddy, fancier still. Do you mean like having an incestuous relationship with your cousin in order to purify the bloodline instead of just on account of she's got big-ass tetties? Yeah, like that shit.

Oh, I do like shit like that. Well, if you like shit like that, you're going to love putting on airs. Our new podcast, wherein to very not fancy dip shit, discuss very fancy, real shit. You can find it wherever you find your podcast, like, subscribe, tell all your friends, and leave us five stars. It's good shit.