wellRED podcast - #398 - WellRED Podcast - JD Vance & The Trump Stuff!

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

This week the boys talk about their old pal JD Vance getting the call from the bullpen to be Trump's VP candidate.... and speaking of Trump MY GOODNESS WHAT A WILD WEEKEND Anyways, not much else to say! Go to TraeCrowder.com to see Trae BonusCorey.com for Corey's bonus stuff Listen to all the podcasts in the Skewniverse: Puttin On Airs, Gravy Baby, Weekly Skews

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we'll say we just talk about farts the whole time yeah i was wondering so yeah i had really nothing really to talk about yeah world at large going into like all day i've been like so do we talk about it front do we talk about it at the end do we talk about it the whole time do we not talk about it at all um either like here's the deal no matter what we do no matter how we handle it we're going to disappoint some people you know so it's kind of like whatever it's kind of it we're it's really a damned if you do damned if you don't situation so i don't know bro but here we are here we are yeah and the thing is I don't even know which thing you're talking about necessarily. Oh.

Oh. Really? Yeah. Mm-hmm. I feel like there's two pretty big things that we could, you know, talk about if we wanted to. Well, they're related, right? Through one man. Yeah.

Oh. Okay. So, okay, the two things you mean is. Were you talking about Death of Slim Shady album coming out? Yeah. Yeah. We're going to talk about that. Yeah.

Yeah. That's what I thought you meant. So we're on the same thing. same page. Yeah. Okay. Well, she's got a new album out. There's all kinds of things, which is why it'd be funny if we just talked about getting drunk again, either getting drunk or like influencers and how much they suck, because it seems like those are the two things we circle back to the most. It is, it is important for everybody to know, and Slim said it, but, you know, I don't know how wide his reach is. You know, maybe people didn't hear it from him and they, they require us to fill them in on their

slim, shady news. But just for anyone wanting to entertain listening to the album, It is a concept album, and it is best if you listen front to back, which personally, I mean, that's how I'll be listening to every album. But I assume some people are like, oh, this one looks like a banger. I'll check it out. But it does have a through line, and I find it to be more enjoyable if you listen to it that way. So yeah, well, I'm glad we got that out of the way. Yep.

All right. So I don't know. Do y'all want to talk about our old friend, or old good buddies? buddy, James Babin. Oh, that too. That's the second thing. The two huge things, Corey, is that the former president

where it's almost assassinated on Saturday. And then he picked our old buddy Hillbilly buddy, J.D. Vance. You weren't doing it a bit, Corey? You really thought Tray meant the Slim Shady Al? No, no, no. I knew that was a bit. I knew that was a bit.

What did you think the two things were? I thought that was part of the bit. Like, in my mind, it was like, there's not two things. There's one fucking thing. And by one thing, you meant the assassination of course. Yeah.

And then when you said two things, I was like, okay, he's doing a bit. The reason I feel like it's not as obvious is the fact that we have met and hung out with the perhaps future vice president. Like if we had never met the guy, I'd be like, of course the one thing is above the other thing. But I feel like because he's a self-professed hillbilly,

who we've all hung out with before. Bought us beers. That elevates it to the level of something you'd, think we would talk about. You're right. So that's what, okay. I think the assassination was just so, it's just, it's the only thing that's been on my mind that it, a pun unintended, Trump, everything. But yeah, you're right. That is something. My mom is so happy, by the way. She's like, immediately texts me. She's like, you've had drinks with the future vice president. I was like, I've had drinks with the former vice president too. And he had ordered. He actually won.

Yeah. That occurred to me too yesterday. I was like, wow, the thing. that that motherfucker, this dude that I used, we used to text or whatever about how wild stuff was. It's like might be the vice president. And then I was like, dude, how gore's your boy? You've been knowing vice presidents. What are you talking about? Also, obviously, I hope he's not ever the fucking vice president. I'm just saying.

He will be, though. It seems like it could happen. I see people saying that like, really, this is a good thing and that, like. It's not, though. He don't, he don't hit as a pick. Like, he don't. He does. You know, normally, okay, but normally,

VP picks are supposed to bring something else to the table. He does. Joe Biden is an old white, so he's got a black woman, whatever, that type of thing. Obama was the exact opposite. McCain was a sane papal, so he picked a lunatic bitch, right? Like they usually mix it up like that. And JD is just like a Trump wannabe. But he's young.

A way less charisma. Yeah, but he's... I think a VP pick can only hurt you. I don't think he can help you, and I don't think he hurts him. He doesn't hurt him. I think the age, I honestly think the, now obviously like Kamala's young too, but like, I'm just saying I think there's a lot of people who like, if Trump had picked like an older pap hallway type person, it would have fed into the whole like, God damn, it's just going to be

another old old. I think that JD is a good pick. By the way, I'm saying all this like, don't want them to fucking win. But I'm saying like, in terms of the Republicans looking for, forward and grooming the next set. Like, it's a good pick. And like you said, like he is sort of a... Yeah, and it really sucks because, like,

he did not start out this way. And here's how I know. We wouldn't have gotten fucking drinks with him multiple times if he started out this way. I mean, we talked about... We thought he was a hero. At that point in time, he was still talking nothing but shit about the... Like, when we met him, he still was, like, openly talking about how much Donald Trump

don't hit. And we talked about that with him. like right how like that's why we hit for him yeah the whole thing was like i understand why fucking rednecks are you know listening to some of this shit but good lord i really hope they wake up hopefully he don't win whatever that whole thing that's what he was saying at the time just so people know he wasn't i mean everybody knows that everybody knows that he had a big flip-flop thing we met him way back when he was still a never trump or and wasn't what an act in the way to he be got to give drew some credit though drew grew very uh appropriately

He jumped on the fuck J.D. Vance train way before at least the other two of us did or anybody. I finished the book. Yeah. Right. Because you did enjoy the book at first. I know that because you're the reason I started reading it. I had the book. Well, first of all, let's say he did our serious political show.

And he said all the things were saying that he said. He was like, never Trump. And you couldn't make an argument if you were what I would call cynically optimist. Like if you were just a dumb optimist of like, well, J.D. thought that the way to like push America forward then was to reach across the aisle and now he thinks it's a different thing, which is I'm sure how he'll spend it. We don't need to get that interview dug up because one of the most popular videos on Reddit right now is showing him back to back with like a split screen. Speeches from that time or interviews from that time when he's like, I think Donald Trump is one of the most cynical people I've ever heard of. in my life and he's going to lead America straight and he's lying to people and then cut to

he's the greatest president of my lifetime. Right. So people are aware and people who care and I don't know who that is that he's a complete flip-flop, full of shit person. What happened with I think all of us is I think we got fooled by someone who is good

on paper. Like in person and I think that's what happened with Jada. He's not very charming and the crack started show. But towards the end of that book and we talked about this then. We were all like, what the buck was that? Yeah. Towards the end, he just throws in this weird defense of payday loan cases. Yeah. And at that time, it doesn't fit the narrative of the book at all. It's just like a footnote,

but weirdly. In retrospect, it does. Yeah, dude, the whole book, and I, even while reading it, it was one of those things that's like, I had like met him, plus everybody was talking about that book, talking about us about every meeting we had. If you read it, it's about. It's about. It's about. made all these Hollywood people were falling over themselves for it. So I read it and was like, and also, again, I relate to a lot of it, obviously. So I, like, connected to a bunch of it. But there's tons of stuff in there that made me kind of go like, hold on, what? Because it's like, and I was saying at the time, I was telling people, I was like, look, me and J.D.

had two very similar experiences and took two very different lessons or whatever you want to say away from it. And that because he was on school lunch. while deriding school lunches. Right. Yeah, right. Scholarships while acting like you don't need a hand up. He was pulling, he was getting pulled up by the government while screaming. Now he's screaming and pull yourself up by your bootstress.

Yeah, well, he was trying to, like you're saying like they don't like government. It's like the problem is not systemic or governmental. These people are not held down. They're holding themselves down because they're lazy and sorry and don't hit it nothing. It's basically what that whole book was arguing really. I mean, it was a whole lot of just like sad, like sob story memoir. type stuff, but in as much as there's a message in it at all, that's kind of what it is. Well, he took an argument from a book called The Bell Curve, which made that same argument about

black people, which was essentially, I'm not racist, they're not bad people, their culture is rotten. And it's not our fault. It's theirs. And then, by the way, that guy was like completely canceled and laughed out of academia. His name's Charles something. I can't remember his last name. Guess who the first person who had him on any sort of TV show.

JD had like a serious show he brought that guy on the guy who wrote the bell curve he just took the bell curve and applied it to Scotch Irish Appalachians when I first started reading the book it starts with his story and as Trey said it's similar to his own and I found it compelling

and at the time I like so many people I think were like craving for like common ground you know and like we could see how split the country was going and I think I may have said this to him I remember thinking like, here is an example of someone that my nephews who are kind of naturally more inclined to conservatism can latch on to maybe. Here's a guy who's like, Trump's full of shit.

And I'm a conservative, but it doesn't mean hating immigrants necessarily, you know, blah, blah, blah. But then you get further along in the book and you really pay attention to the theme. Trojan horse. Oh, you're saying it's all our fault. Right. in that tech and the cash places are great. And then you find out Peter Thiel is one of his main business partners and bankrolled the book. Peter Till is, I would say him and Larry Fink are probably the two most prominent figures in American politics with money arguing for the privatization of everything.

Huge top candidate for worst gay, I think. Yes. The Coke brother, one of the Koch brothers is dead. That Milo guy, he's pretty bad. Yeah, he is, but he ain't, but he's like gone. He's kind of gone now. Yeah. Oh, worst gays.

I think you were talking about people arguing for privatization. The Koch brothers to a certain extent, and then Larry Fink, who owns Black Rock, and then Thiel are like actively spending lots of money trying to privatize everything in America, which is genuinely a horrendous outcome. Right. And it seems to me in retrospect that J.D. went from like pawn in that almost. to like now potentially leader of it. I mean, this is real blocky of alia macabre shit. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And like, you know, with with JD and like Trey

having a similar experience and a similar background and like, you know, I'm sure somebody like J.D. loves to point it as like, and look at us now, you know what I mean? Not realizing the very obvious of like, y'all are the exceptions that prove the rule, not the fucking rule. I think he like embraces.

that part, meaning like, I feel like it's supposed to be part of the implication for his argument is like, uh, see, I hit. The rest of them don't. Right. They would just do what I do. But if they, right, right. Yeah, right. Exactly. They could, they could be doing what I did, but they won't. But that's because of cultural problems or whatever, where, you know, I understand. I'm like, I got lucky. Okay. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. But like, I understand how some people from the coast who have no idea what goes on in the middle of the country or the south could read that. They don't know shit. So they're like, well, here's this guy saying it.

So like, I kind of believe him. But like being from this area, dude, of course there's a shit ton of my buddies who have wasted potential on pills. Like, duh, of course that happened. But I've also got plenty of buddies who never got hooked on pills who worked their fucking ass off. You know, they really do. They work their ass off.

They care about their family. And then one medical bill after this, the next thing, you know, they're completely fucking destitute. No matter how hard they fucking work, no matter how many bootstraps they pull up. And it's like you want to discount those people. Like the only two people in the South who exist are people like you who stayed away from pills and succeeded and pillheads. That's fucking it. Like that's crazy. Yeah, I 100% agree.

It also overlooks how available the pills were, how doctors were lied to and or actively lying to people about the pills. It overlooks people who didn't snort pills to get high in the first place, but did them because they hurt their fucking back. So it's all those things. But I want to say that I feel genuinely that what happened is that Jady thought his trajectory into the American Zygeist was going to be Hollywood. I mean, you wrote a fucking movie that ruined Amy Adams' career for God's sake. That didn't work. And he pivoted to the next best thing in his mind.

And Trump is the example of that. I mean, in a lot of ways, his career somewhat mirrors Trump where he got to touch Hollywood. You think Hollywood... Get him where he wanted, so then he moved into politics. I think Hollywood hating that movie pissed him off so much that he was like, let's do... I don't think it's anger. I'm saying I think that explains his interest in us. I don't think he ever actually give a fuck about us.

He thought, Trey Crowder's on the come up. This was around the time the TV show was about to pop off. I think he wanted to break into Hollywood. So he was sending out, he was trying to go on Bill Maher. he was trying to get with Tray Crowder. He was doing things to get into Hollywood. That did work out, but not the way he wanted to. And he realized through Trump, wait a minute, there's actually more power to be had.

I, okay, so I feel like if you look at his past upbringing, like his backstory, Ivy League, military law school, big money, book, talking head shit. I feel like that motherfucker has been politically minded from day. Yeah, maybe. Maybe the Hollywood thing was just for that. And the Hollywood thing is like a nice little detour. Ben Carson got his movie before politics. But it's like, you know, also not to make it weird, but like, it's just raven that all these super liberal coastal people were like jacking that book off so much.

And not ours. When later that same year, we wrote a book that's like very, very similar in a lot of ways in terms of right. And true. And also like comes from a play. of love and does not shit on everybody there. And, and, you know, nobody except Whoopi Goldberg gave a fuck about that much. Michael Eisner,

Michael Eisener holler one time. I don't think it's because his had come out before. They were already, they were like, no, we already got a hillbilly thing. Yeah. Happened already. Or it's just, our book just didn't hit or what.

Well, we, no, he's shit on people they hate. Right. That's it. And we defended them. They might confirm them. They are.

Well, that's the great irony of his current attachment to Trump. And then this, like, guy who runs on working man issues he says is that he absolutely shit on poor people to the liberal coastal elites

in order to now be the worst enemy of a liberal coastal elites. Right, right. And they deserve it, frankly. But half of them also invest in checking the cash places, bro. Yeah, and BlackRock and shit like that. Yeah, maybe it's

because ours wasn't a singular narrative. You know, we fucked up there. Rock owned by doing. What do you think? Yeah, that too owns Black Rock. That would have been, it'd have been much harder,

Joe, to weave a, one single linear narrative. Oh, I agree. Of us writing it. Oh, I agree.

No, I agree. In the move. I want to say, I believe in my heart that you, Trey, were probably vetted by whatever the left. Like,

you constantly are getting emails from people talking about you should run, you should meet this person. If you had displayed, to those people, the sort of Machiavellian, just audaciousness this guy clearly has. The fucking lizard, evil.

I almost feel like in my heart, people had a meeting about you, and they were like, turns out, that guy's got a good heart, so fuck him. No, I know what it is. They, I know what it is. Somebody was like, just Trey Crowder, we need him to run,

and someone dug up that DMX video that Trey thinks is gone. And they were like, He's got it. Corey kept sending it to him. Actually, this is, we wanted to tell you this, Ray. They kept asking us about you, and we were like, we don't know how else yet. It's not paid off.

And I did it for you. I did it for you. I was like, because if I show this them now, it won't get out. You know? I didn't say, and it looked back. I think that, uh, I think that people like that. I think another thing is just our book also was like, it was very serious in parts and we took it seriously.

But it's also, do people like, those jerk off intelligenceia, type people and people in politics and stuff, they hate funny shit. I hate it. They hate comedy. They look down on it. They think it's beneath them. Our book's way better. I feel like any of those dudes are like,

if they ever do look at me, they're like, they don't respect comedians or people who are funny. It's like, you've got to take yourself seriously. This is serious business. But also I'd say wild shit that I'm sure they're like, especially like the left,

politics on the left. They're like, that guy says way too much wild shit for our whole thing. Well, you mean that gun chapter fucked on. on the left. The actual left loves it when you say wild shit, especially the gun chapter. Yeah, right.

Let me say two things that I think we've left out. One is it should be noted that his mentor is the woman who wrote Tiger Mom. She's a professor at Yale law, I think. What's Tiger Mom? You don't remember Tiger Mom? It was a big thing at the time. It was a phenomenon where this woman makes the argument that daughters and sons of, I want to say, Korean immigrants are, by and large, more successful because of the way their mother approaches

their childhood and education, which is essentially abuse. You know, right. You know the stereotype of like, you ever said that family guy clip? Yeah. Asian dad walks in the room. He goes, you doctor yet? You doctor yet? And the kid's like, no, I'm 12.

He goes, talk to me when you doctor. And it closes the door. And it's like, you know, it's like we're Asians, not be Asians, right? Like you can't make beans. You got to make straight. All those jokes. The best stereotype to have about a people. Right.

But all the, that's like the tiger mom. was like an intellectual exploration of that of that so going back to your point tray i could see that he was guided by people with a lot more experience who i would say i would admit are smarter than all of us who shaped like our book was they asked us i don't know they asked us to do it so we told the truth whereas this was a plan from the get-go right to do a certain thing i totally believe that right i do too uh because body this is Nobody really knows how he got up with Peter Till in the first place, though, right? Like, they just kind of, I think Peter Till do what?

I assume either her or he was probably a middle member of the Federalist Society at Yale, which is a right-wing law group that is currently responsible for what's going on in the Supreme Court, and I should have murdered all the ones at my school. Ivy League, yeah, connections probably. But it's like, I think that I think he met Peter Thiel and got identified as, like, being useful in this exact, the combination of things that he was, I feel like Peter Till

and his type people were like, we can use that. And I think they've been pushing him and using that this whole time. And now Peter Thiel's like this close to the White House. You know, so like it's obviously working like a fucking charm. I mean, that's what I think is. The same thing I wanted to add to it, and it's related to that and us being smart,

but not smart enough. I wish we would have recognized him for the opposition, not just like to what we believe in in our hearts. I mean, almost like wrestling, if that helps, Corey. He was like, hey, can I come on your show and we talk about middle ground? And our hearts were like, that's what America needs. Absolutely, guy who in my head was like my father-in-law instead of the people who are lying to my father-in-law.

Yeah, this was also 2016, way different time. Right. I wish we would have been like, nah, what we need to do is have this guy on here and say to his face and then put this clip out over and over again, you're out here selling your book, they should be reading our fucking book. Your book ain't shit, our book's shit. And then we would have Trey in the White House right now.

Yeah, I don't know, though. Trey can't lie. That's true. You know what I mean? George Washington, you know, and he hit in the White House. That's true. What if he lied about not being able to lie, though?

I'm sure he did. Yeah, he would. Watching shit was bullshit. Also, he wouldn't have made it to... He used to reference. Everyone goes, he said, I cannot tell a lie. Well, that's what liar said. If George Washington truly had the amount of integrity he had, which he very did not,

but if he did, he'd never make it today in politics. Like, he'd never fucking make it. No. I think I'm, I'm either getting sick or my voice is getting mad at me, and that don't hit, you know. We've talked about how his teeth was slaves, right? Yeah, his teeth was slaves. Yeah, that's a Shane Gillis bit, and it is phenomenal. Yeah, it is phenomenal.

nominal. Yeah, that's it. But I don't know. I mean, yeah, you want to talk to the assassination thing. Corey, do you start thinking wrestling stuff? Oh, yeah, man. And there were so many memes that I'd already thought about. Like, there was one, I sent you all a couple of them where it was like, man, say what you

will about the WWE, but they really taught Trump to find the hard cam, which the hard cam is the one like, you know, right there on your face. I mean, that whole part of it, the way the blood, how much blood there was, where the blood was, the shape of it and that part, the hard cam and the fist. I mean, it all was, it did look very pro wrestling. Wrestling e. Don't get me wrong. I don't think there's some conspiracy. I think some, you know, crazy kid tried to shoot Donald Trump. That's what I think happened.

But it did work. I want to read this one too, and I'm going to try my best to do it in Stone Cold's voice. This is a meme that happens all the time because Stone Cold, you know, he has his own talk show. And he uses a lot of wrestling. lingo that even some wrestling fans don't know you have to just kind of be in on it so this is this is an impression somebody has tweeted uh jace uh officially jace on twitter it's stone cold going like this clearly interviewing someone he says so there you are w w hala famer on the campaign trail running for president of the u s a i hear shots i hear the pops world sees you take a dive next

thing you know you got color world wants to know god damn kid you working or shooting which is fucking hilarious. Because dude, it, so here's like, fuck all the, there's a million conspiracy theories. There were,

like within five minutes, Reddit had 9,000 of them. And I'm not saying, I don't believe none of them. I'm just saying, this isn't me trying to prop anything up. But the way that Trump reacted, it very much looked like a man reacting to,

damn, we pulled it off. Like, you know what I mean? Like, he immediately turns around. He's like, hell yeah,

Like it doesn't look like a man with a shred of fear. And I know they're all going to say like, well, that's because he's a fucking badass. No, he's not. He's a chicken shit, piece of ass. But it, like, it just, it was too fucking perfect, man. He's a chicken shit. You called Trump a piece of ass. I just, I wanted to say chicken.

I said chicken shit. Yeah, I said chicken shit. And I was like, fuck, I can't say. I would have enjoyed chicken ass piece of shit. That would have worked. He's a chicken ass piece of shit. There we go. Flip it.

Piece of ass. Flip it and reverse it. But it all did just seem so fucking perfect. It's like he barely gets clipped. He gets the perfect amount of color. There's this fucking beautiful Iwo Jima American flag, like right in the back. He's fucking doing this shit. And I'm like, I don't know, dude.

Because here's the thing too, man, like from where that goddamn shooter was, if you read any of these fucking special ops people talking about it, they're like, that is absolutely well within the zone. that any competent secret service team would have already scoped out. Like that range, like there's no fucking reason for this guy to have ever been there because that would have been like, hey, definitely check any building within this range, you know. But in that scenario, the secret service is in on it and they're in on faking it. Yes, right, true.

That's hard to fathom because they're going to take the fall for it at the very least, as incompetent. Right. And they had a woman running it. I think that, well, like, I mean, everything you said is true, Joe, but it's like, dude, I mean, how many different times do the various versions of law enforcement in this country have to prove to us that they're populated mostly by dumbasses? Oh, no, no, I know.

I know. No, dude, I know. But one of two things is true. Yeah, either his secret service completely fucked up, which is plausible, or they didn't fuck up at all and they just needed it to seem like a fuck up but no i mean dude you're right or they kind of fucked up a little and then and this is like one of the prevailing theories that because they saw the guy yeah and then there's all these excuses as to why he got a shot off and one of the main ones is like pretty impressive by the way i don't think the secret a lot of one of the main theories

is people going i don't think the secret service planned it but i think they turned their head for a Right. Who are you in that, sir? I think that that dude had just made them skip breakfast and they didn't want to and they were like, which roof are you talking about? Yeah, right. Let me say one thing to counter what you said that I'm, because I got texts from a lot of my friends. And it was so funny because my response, and this is what I did on stage, was like, oh, now you guys believe in conspiracy theories, liberals?

Right, yeah. Like, I've been trying to get you guys to talk to me about the moon or Epstein Island for years and you got nothing for me. I made the same joke, but about myself, though. Like I said, I was like, I was like, I've never been a conspiracy person, but if they start saying that this was on stage Saturday night before we knew anything, I was like, but if they start saying this shooter is a fucking trans Mexican migrant, whatever, I'm going to be fucking connecting tax with string tomorrow. We'll do.

That's self-awareness. You know my fucking basement dwelling Reddit ass has been salivating at the glance because I'm all fucking in on that shit. Now, like, that's what I'm saying is like I have people who just aren't like that being like, this was clearly staged. And my only response to that, the blood and the flag is too weird. But my only response to that is, one, it doesn't seem like there's the picture of the bullet, a guy got killed. Like, it would be hard to fake that.

And then Nick is like, that's crazy. No, I agree. The talent level wasn't there in that 20-year-old. Right. But two, you got to understand, it's not bravery, but Trump is genuinely mentally ill. when it comes to his narcissism and belief in himself. Right. Just like, let me give you an example.

He thinks he's good at business. Right. There's, he thinks he's famous because he's talented. Right. It comes like the apprentice. So like, of course he stood up and pumped his fist. That's my take on it because he thinks he beat that guy. Right.

His probably first reaction was me and God just whooped an assassin's ass. And so like, and God killed my supporter. And that does feel like bravery to people who aren't insane. So like we're screwed by way. I mean, everybody. Also, dude, at what point do we kind of have to just acknowledge that clearly he's right about him and God and whatever the fuck is going on here? Like God's a dick. Everything comes up Trump, dog, all the way.

Like we all know that he is a fucking lunatic, a narcissist, a dumbass. All these. he is all these things and like he has all he does is win win win all that's all he does he just fucking traipses through life just sleepwalks or everything just fucking

having money despite losing money all the time fucking being famous for kind of nothing then fucking yeah and then like becoming we clearly has a talent like it's just not what he thinks it is it kind of reminds me of the rooster the goat a little bit

it's like Trump has a talent, it's not the talents he claims to have. Does that make sense? He's compelling. Dude. The guy has charisma. He thinks he has charm. Right.

He definitely has charisma. That's for sure. Right. And he thinks he's a genius, right? He thinks he's a genius that has charm when realistically he is just a charismatic train wreck that you cannot look away from. And he's like that, you know, we were, like it's a known, established and beloved, comedic archetype when it's played for laughs, the overly confident.

confident dumbass like, you know, Will Ferrell and Damien McBride are both. They've made careers out of doing that. Right. They're both great at it. And it's like Trump is like that, but in real life, like he really is that person. And people love that fucking thing. And also, I'm just saying like, the universe clearly shines on this motherfucker. Like, I don't know.

It drives me insane. It don't hit for me. Don't anybody get me wrong. I wish it didn't. But like, there's just no denying at this point, man. He is like, he's touched by something. Like it, like he's just, everything just comes up, Donnie. Like I said, he just, he just can't not hit somehow.

They dismissed his court case the next day. Right. Which I don't think that's a coincidence. Of course not. She was sitting, it was a 93 page opinion. She had that done for a while. Yeah. Yeah, it don't, it don't hit in a lot of ways.

But I'll tell you, can I tell you one thing that has been baffling to me is that, and this is just total proof but we say it all the time that like Twitter ain't the real world the online ain't the real world you know I had my own personal lesson with that exact thing yes you did week yes you did buddy no one's talking about it

one way or the other and let me explain what I mean so when he got when he got shot and I thought well maybe this is just it in the confines of the show I was doing. Then I get, I got, I was in, the day after he got shot, I was in an Arkansas airport and I intentionally didn't put my headphones in because I wanted to walk around and just listen.

I just wanted to hear, you know, what the fuck was being said. So we, I had to go on stage and so to Trey. I'm about an hour and a half out. I think we all did. Yeah, right. You're right. And we're, we're an hour and a half out and we're setting up, right. The, the building's setting up.

we did a show for the national social workers of America. So that's the vibe in there, right? And we've also got a documentary crew with us. So at one point, you will be able to literally physically see all of our reactions. Well, all the comedians, we were like, at first we didn't know what to say. We were like, we gave it five minutes of like, it's a bit, it's AI, let's not, you know, whatever. And then we kept seeing it, kept seeing it. We're like, no, shit, this happened.

Then it was like, did he get hit? Then we see the blood. It's like, you know, did he do a blade job? You know what I mean? What the fuck is happening? And then it finally set in with all of us that like, no, this is true. The presidential candidate, like, he almost got assassinated. That actually happened.

And as comedians, we were all like, okay, this is going to change the tenor of the show a little bit. Like, it's going to have to. Like, it has to because by the time everyone gets here, they were, they're going to have seen the news. Like, you don't, there's no, like an hour and a half. bro it my it happened 15 minutes for my show started because my saturday show started at 6 o'clock 15 minutes before and as the show was starting every person in the showroom was lit up by the light of their phone like everyone in there was on their phone of course they were no of course they were so we had this whole thing like before our shows there were they were that we were doing voter registration and all this there was all these little like fucking little things that were happening and and it was like before the audience sat down, you know, they would talk to these people and these people and they'd do voter registration. And I made the call. I said, hey, guys, let's not do that part.

I said, let's not. I said, let's just seat everybody and we'll do the show. And I said, because like, I feel like that's going to take a long time because people are going to be in line being like, oh, my God, did you see? Oh, my God. Did you, you know, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And the people that were running this place were like, why? What, what has changed? Like, what do you, what do you mean?

Why is it going to be different? And I was like, well, the ex-president was just shot. And one of them was like, oh, really? And this was like an hour later. She just hadn't checked her phone. And we've been running around frantically talking about it. And she was just like, just this look of malaise on her face. She was like, huh, well, no, I think we should just do whatever.

Like, unaffected at all. Unaffected, whatever. Well, then we go to do the show and it's like, okay, there's six comedians on this show. We got to decide right now who's going to talk about it. because we can't all go up there and fucking try to do a type five on this because we're going to be stepping on each other's toes. So the person that was going out first was my friend, Nagin Farsad, and she was like, you know what,

I think I'm just going to go up and just mention that it happened, get it out of the way, deflate the room, and then we're just going to go on with the show, right? Well, she ends up not doing that at all, and then not getting, she was just like, you know what, fuck this shit. and she had a good set. And then you mean like, fuck the shit as then I'm going to talk about it or like I'm not even going to mention it at all. She didn't mention it at all.

And so and this is a room full of, you know, mostly liberal people. A lot of, you know, we're in Fayetteville. So a lot of well-read people, a lot of putting on airs people or whatever. And now I'm like, I'm the, she's the host. I'm the first comedian or whatever. And so I'm like, she didn't do it. So like, is the onus on me? And I was like, this is going to suck because I can't.

if I start talking about this, that's going to be my whole set. You know what I mean? Like, I don't do quick little things. And so I get up there, and I'm like, well, we'll see how the first joke goes. If everybody's, like, you know, kind of distracted or whatever, I just started talking about my Uber ride

and how I rode with this dude named Bobby and how the game warden didn't hit for him. And it's fucking slaughtering. It's fucking murdering, right? They're a fuck, I know Bobby goddamn, you know. And then next thing you know, I've just done my set. And I was like, holy shit, I didn't bring it up either.

And then nobody did. And then after the show, nobody even talked about it. Like, no, no fan even said a fucking word about it. I ain't going to lie. I mean, that's wild to me that not one of y'all talks about it. I'm not saying that, I mean, that, I don't, like, it's fine. I'm just, like, I, I, I, my show is about to start. There's a whole, a local host in Oklahoma, his name Landry.

And then Donnie's with me, the feature, sweet boy, Donnie. And, uh, wait, my Landry? No, no, no, no, no. Okay. You think that Landry would be hosting at the Looney Bin in Tulsa? Absolutely not. That's why I was confused. This Landry hits, though, by the way.

Yeah, shout out of that. No, no. But this Landry, but I was like, oh, damn, really? No, no. But Landry in Oklahoma, like, used to write for Conan. And then moved back to Oklahoma and shit. But anyway, so he's good. He's funny.

But the three of us immediately were all like, all, like, all right, what are we going to? And they both of them were like, because I go up last because I'm a headliner, but they both were like deferring to me. Of course. We know these people want to hear you talk about this. We know you're going to talk about it, but we feel like we have to say something.

So we were like all collaborating on what each person's like angle was going to be. You know, and like when the host is like, I'm going to say one quick thing. I can't remember what it was. But he had like one joke. He was I'm going to say this and then try to just move on, which is what he did. Donnie had his angle on it, which didn't step on the time.

And then I went up there and then, you know, and I did my stuff. And, of course, you know, Kilt. And the club was tape. The Looniebin in Tulsa is fucking awesome, sincerely. I've never been there before. It's a sweet room. So shout out to them. But they were taping every show.

And this happens on Saturday. We get done with the night. I'm like, hey, I definitely want that. He was like, right. So about that, the camera went down. Yep. apparently tonight and we didn't get any of that. And I was like, you serious, bro?

Yeah, that's such a bummer. Yeah, so anyway. But anyways, aside from the show, I go to the airport, assuming, I'm in Arkansas airport, it's going to be brought up. I'm walking past bars where Fox News is playing and everyone's talking about how they just started watching receivers on Netflix. No one's fucking talking about it. Then I get on the motherfucking plane filled with old white dudes and fishing shirts.

And I'm like, surely goodness and fucking mercy, I'm about to hear some, can you believe this shit? No one. I didn't hear a goddamn word all day from liberal nor conservative. And I'm like, is this where we are in the world that this shit can happen? And everybody's just like another day, another dollar. What the fuck? I do think that's part of it.

I think the people are so fucking overwhelmed. with crazy shit incessantly all the goddamn time that it's like things just don't penetrate to where they used to. But I also think though, I know how I felt. Like the dude comes in,

he's like, so Trump just got shot and our initial reaction like you were, I was like, okay, ha ha, clearly no. I was like, that's, you're fucking with us. Obviously,

you're about to show us a big black dick or Rick Rollis or something. He was like, no, no, no. Trump got shot. And we're all like, what do you mean? by how we got shot. Yeah, right.

And then everybody pulls out their phone and we get on Twitter and start looking for stuff. And for me, you see the video. And the moment you see the video immediately, you're like, okay, he's totally fine. Like he's completely totally. And I feel like that had a big part. And obviously, it's still a huge story and everything. Don't get you wrong. But I think that truly got, like, got, like, got, you know, even if he later survived it,

if he got like fucking plugged and fell out. I think it would have been a different story from what you're talking about. But because it was so immediately evident that he barely got grazed at all and he's clearly totally fine, I feel like that changed the tenor of the aftermath. I know, I know. I know. I mean, yeah, it is crazy. I'm just saying I think that that's part of it. Because, like, I opened up Twitter being like, fucking Trump got shot.

What does this? But what the fuck? And then you see it. And again, you're like, oh, okay, all right. Well, I mean, so he's clearly. all right. Yeah, because that was my first thought, too, when they said Trump got shot. I was like, Lincoln or Reagan, which or... And it wasn't even really right.

It wasn't even really... No, it was way in between... Like, it was fucking Holyfield, if anything. Like, it was, you know, so... I'm right? Yeah. Drew. People were talking around Knoxville. I'll say that. And I know I just did a podcast with DJ. Everyone should listen to Gravy Baby this week.

If you want to hear DJ... DJ Lewis absolutely go in on what the truth behind the truth is. I do. I'm going to listen to that as soon as we record. He was at work in the meat department, and they were apparently absolutely fired up, ready to avenge the king. At my show, so I had a private gig that started at 9 for like a private party.

I jumped on a don't tell and it's funny I hit record on my phone tray and I didn't apparently like I walked on stage and I sat it on the stool and was just going to do like the up the nose shot because I was like let me put this out as soon as possible

Meanwhile I had a full documentary crew and just didn't address it So that is funny That's very funny that you mentioned But yeah I almost did that through But because I was like This would be way faster But I was like nah

The other thing will look way better It would be better quality. And then I definitely should have done it. Well, then, like, the woman who went before me was from Austin, and she did not talk about it. And it was pretty clear the 10 she's been working on. She was very funny. And it was like, unless I don't know how to read comics anymore,

this was a very good six to seven year vet who was doing the tight, like, you know what I mean? This is my shit. This is my fouling. Yeah. So I thought she might have been taping. So I hit her. up and she had been, but like, somebody turned it off for her.

I did about two minutes up top. Well, let me say this about the general vibe. Most comics mentioned it. Yeah. Most comics felt like, there were comics there even who had jokes about politics and Trump were like, I can't do this joke about Joe Biden and the election were in. And not. At least acknowledge it.

Of course. Mine was on, and I only had like three punchlines. but I was still killing because people were on board of me. And maybe this explains your experience, Corey. My whole thing was like, my honest response, y'all, is that the next three weeks, the worst people in the world are going to be screaming into their phones and type a 97 paragraph long Facebook posts. And we're never going to catch a break.

We are in political groundhog day. Right. Mitch McConnell saw the shadow. of his gold on Nancy Pelosi's titties. Net gooks. And now we have six more years of 2016 over and over again. And I just talked about how

like we're going to have Uncle Darren doing trigonometry when he can't read. Right. And then I said, and I've got my liberal friends texting me, this was all staged. And I'm like, you don't believe in conspiracy theories. This ain't you. Don't do it now. I've been trying to get you to do it for years.

And I felt like everyone was almost relief laughing that I was going, don't this suck for us. Do we have to go through the 24-hour news cycle and the social media cycle of the worst people alive, both on the news and on social media, and I'm one of them,

just like milking this for the next three weeks? And these people getting to be a victim and have like something they can point to that's like, oh, fuck it, you know. And they loved that angle, and maybe that explains what you were seeing, Corey. of like, I think people, even people who are like, mad, people who like Donald Trump are like,

just tired, dude. They're tired of discourse. And for the record, like, I've never been happier in my life that that happened, that nobody was talking about it. Like, I was ecstatic because, like, that's literally the first thing I thought of, when he got shot,

I was like, I have to be at an airport in Arkansas tomorrow, you know. By the way, real quick, and we can move on. In-Law just got back from Disneyland. Ain't brought it up once. dude my mom picked me up from the airport didn't say a word i've talked to my dad didn't say a fucking word now granted like maybe everybody just knows like this one's a little too fucking like right we can't play around with this one yeah we can't play around with this and i just found i knew

i knew nancy pelosi was was old i did not know that she was 87 but bruh them titties is 38 like that is wild that's why that guy was mad at her with a hammer which you know i didn't bring her up on accident i didn't say this in the joke but I kind of wanted to work that in there of like, and if anybody is going to, like, play the woe as me, Victor, remember how they didn't give a shit when that dude tried to murk her husband with a hammer? Nobody gave a fuck.

They was happy. I brought that up in the video I made about it, about how it wasn't just that one, you know, him, and then like Gretchen, that whole Gretchen Whitmer plot and obviously January 6 and stuff, and they don't, you know, they're just, oh, yeah. They flex all that, make bumper stickers out of that shit or whatever.

Yeah, then this, like, for example, you know, uh, tenacious D, right, who hit super hard, love Jack Black, I'm glad we're talking about this. Kyle, Kyle, Gas, the other member of Tenacious Day, who also rules, Cage, KG.

It was his birthday on stage, I guess, last, not Sunday night, maybe, I don't think it was night. It was either the night of or like the next night. They had a concert and it was KG's birthday. So Jack Black brings a birthday cake out to him and he says, make a wish, brother. And he goes, don't miss next time or don't miss Trump next time.

Right. And that's like, it's clearly an offhand thing. no way they planned that. Of course not. A little birthday thing. It comes as money. He spits it out.

He gets a little this, that or whatever. And then now today, Jack Black announced that they're canceling the entire rest of their tour as a result of that. And it's like, what? People are still coming to see y'all.

You shouldn't do that. Everyone's good. Are they really getting that much pushback from? Because I think of Tenacious D fans and I don't feel like they're, I'm sure there's some mag of people who love today's not enough to cancel a tour. Not enough to cancel a tour. Right. You think he was worried about some.

someone. Dude, they've already been, dude, he's been getting hell lately anyway because he endorsed Biden. Because he endorsed Biden and did that whole little speech and they got mad about that. And then this happened right after that. Maybe he just maybe he just wants to just, maybe he just wants to maybe he just wants to like lock himself up in his house and play video games for a few ways. Right.

Because fuck all these people. And that's different. They could have been like on the verge of neither wanting to tour anyways. And they were like, let's just say it was this. So I've been spending all morning thinking about. this genuinely because you couple this with like what we're hearing from a lot of democratic leaders which is like we don't condone violence it's like you my fuckers is condoning it in Gaza right now but that aside they're like violence it's never the answer and it's like but all right but y'all been warning us that this

guy's a threat to the very soul of our democracy for now eight years and to me if you mean that you got to be at least medium okay like an actual threat to the soul of our very fabric of our country, that feels like we're at the very least allowed to like be like, well, no shit. I think as far as that goes. Go ahead. Well, I just wanted to say, I'm trying to like,

I spit on more thinking about that and then Jack Black does this and I'm going, okay, we put a positive spin on this. Maybe it's a good thing that there are people in this country not, openly pining for murder, even if I think that it makes them either weak or a hypocrite or whatever, because Donald Trump's been pining for this type of thing for a while.

He totally deserves it, in my opinion. But, like, maybe it's a good thing that people are still trying to hang on to decency. I think that it's, I think, because I feel like it's come up over the years, when the idea has come up before, I feel like in podcasts and whatever else, conversations about, like,

God damn wish this motherfucker was dead, right? And it's like, yeah, well, of cancer. I don't know, exactly. That's what I'm about to say. I think that anybody could say like, ah, God damn, I wish he wasn't around no more, but not like that. Dude, if that happens, it's not good. The fallout of that ultimately is way worse. I agree with Corey.

But, but if he got, like, if he got. Because I understand there would have been violent retaliation if he had died, but like, what about the long time? If it was provably. They had got another one. If it was provably. an accident or a disease or something like that and he died buddy popping bottles dog absolutely rules making all kinds of jokes about how hard that hits but i don't think the outcome of him being successfully assassinated would hit for this country at all a lot of people so i'm genuinely

glad that that did not work out because i think it would go real real bad if it did i understand the argument a lot of people would buy that and i'll sit with you guys in it and you're right and it's wrong to openly find for the murder of people i guess but But I don't know if I buy that it would be worse for the country long term. I know that it would deify him, but they don't have another one. If they did, because they've been looking for one for a long time. The other thing that would happen is they would destroy each other. They would destroy each other.

Now, I do think they might win the White House because what Corey just pointed out still. But like they would destroy each other trying to get that spot. There's no one like him. No, there is no one like him. But like that's another, like, dude, again, like, I'm with, I just, I'm with, Trey on this in the sense of like, if he just magically got super aids and died of it, hits.

But like, if he got, if he truly got assassinated, like, I don't know when we recover from that. Like, I don't, I don't. No, dude. No. Absolutely not. There's no fixing the pining for fascism that's going on in our country right now overnight. We were too broken.

Our systems are too. corrupt. People want strong leadership because they know that everything's bullshit. But in terms of getting over it, like in terms of people being mad and wanting blood because Trump's dead, a month. I'm just saying there's militias ready to form

right this second anyways. But they existed before he did. I know. I'm acknowledging the violence. I'm saying you guys are right about that. Like the violent reaction, but I think it'd be quick and I think long term, I do think we would be better off if he died, regardless of how he died. I do think that.

Well, yeah, but how long term because I don't want the violence? How long term, though? The next four years. Okay. I just like, dude, here's, I mean, obviously, guys, listen, best fucking case scenario ever

is that at the next presidential debate, they both have the exact same stroke at the same time, and then what? It's JD versus Kamala, and he wipes the fucking floor with her? I'm saying that wouldn't hit, I guess. But as far as the idea that we live in a simulation or something,

if that literally happened, you know, I got to go. I got to go to space. I think I would, might actually lose my mind. Because it would be on purpose. Yeah, right. The Black Rock people put something in their drink, you know. Yeah. I would take care of mine.

And then if that happened, I would take care of mine. Like, I would make peace with everyone in my family, right? left, whatever, I'd be like, guys, clearly aliens are controlling this. And I build a bunker. And then I'd just party at the end of the world. Oh, I'll tell you what? Party at the end of the world, dog. I'm with you, bro, because me and you, Drew, we live in, you hell, you've done a joke about it on stage.

We live in the best spot for a huge fallout like that. You know what I mean? Like, if that were to happen, like, me and you, me and you could get set up pretty fucking quick to where it's just like, you know what? Nobody in, nobody out. You know, everybody, everybody around here, as long as I didn't wear my support queers in wrestling shirt, would just assume I fall in with them, you know, and we just like, hell, dude, between me and my in-laws and stuff, we got four gardens going right fucking now.

All we got to do is start digging, you know, and my fucking father is a goddamn contractor, like, we have a bunker. Dude, I have you bunker by three. You know what I mean? I bet my dad already has one. Yeah. Richard Simmons died too. Oh, yeah.

Also, and another, you know. And Shannon Doherty don't hit. Yeah, yeah, and Dr. Ruth and Jacoby, Jacobi Jones, Baltimore Ravens legend. Dude, good. Dr. Ruth is due. All right. God damn it.

Yeah. That bitch grossed me out when I was a kid so much. I thought you just meant because she had to be pushing a fucking husband. Oh, she was like 90-something seven years old, but I've been wishing for her to die for years. I'm going to give you some pushback. Fuck that. Dr. Ruth ruled, dude.

She did rule as far as what she did, but like when I was a certain age, hearing her being like, you put ze beads in the butthole and you vet, you know, it didn't hit. I was like, get young. I don't have a problem with Dr. Ruth. I just mean that like, whenever somebody who's 97 dies, there's nothing even a little bit. Gross, dude. She didn't look good enough.

You got off her a penguin, dude. I know that don't hit. That does it. She traumatized young me. I'm glad she's fucking dead. No. At 97. A big, pretty blonde, who made out with you when she was 17 and you were in fifth grade,

traumatized young you. Yeah, and she's not doing well. The church traumatized you, and you're blaming Dr. Ruth. Yeah, no, that's true. I'll be honest with you. I don't think I like foreigners when I was in middle school. I think that might have been. Get American, bitch.

Then you can talk about the vulva. You know, and you blame the doctor. Yeah. Can I read a quote that I liked from this week? Is it about Richard Simmons? No, it's about J.D. Vance. This is the quote from Trey Crowder. I understand that my people, talking about hillbillies,

do not suffer due to some inborn cultural affliction, but do instead to the capricious malice of the masters he serves. God. Yeah, I was really up my butt with that one, though. You were, had to smell. I was wondering. A couple drinks last night. Stank!

To circle back. And this isn't a blank. I'm saying none of us could see the future. If you had said that to him on Sirius, he didn't know capricious at the time we just sold a billion bucks stock yeah yeah maybe we'll sell more now i doubt someone sent me a picture of one for sale for 79 cents hey hey hey hold up though hold up though i stay checking at mackays i stay checking at mackays and it is still $15 at mackays which is half off which is insane for mackays and by the way i was like one day i was like you know what uh i bet you

this is just the same one and nobody's bought it. So the last time, but two times ago when I was at McKay's, I took a marker and I autographed that fucking book. Next time I went, different book. Still going for 15. That is half off, motherfucker. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's good for a

fucking eight-year-old book. You can still get it by the way, wherever you get your books. The Liberal Redneck Manifesto also on Audible and we read it. And I would say if you're out there and you're like, I'm, I'm gonna buy J.D. Vance's book just to see what's for. I bet you it comes up in the recommendations.

If you like people that are dumb saying smart stuff, you'll also like this. It's a fantastic book. It tells the goddamn truth. And I don't know if in it we say fuck check cash in places, but it's the subtext. Fuck them. They don't hit. They're brought up.

Yeah, they don't hit. Man, I don't know what it is. Just my time. I had been thinking lately I hadn't been sick in a while. I'm pretty sure that I'm, I think I'm about to be sick. You want to see something scary? I'm morning for no reason.

Yeah. I haven't been partying. I've been sleeping. I just, I'm sick. It's going around, brother. I'm about to be sick because I just got back from the road and it's a rule of law. You want to see something scary real quick before we go?

No, I'm going to go. Okay. I'm scared. All right. Do you plug your shit? You can show them. I don't have any shit to plug. I'm off the road until August.

Yep. Send me money. Send me money. I too think I'm retiring from comedy. I don't want to do it anymore. I was just be home. Just be home and do podcast. Trey, which we've got putting on airs, which comes out every Friday.

You can listen to it wherever you get your podcast, or you can go to watch p.OA.com. I was wondering what was going on. My son is up here. Hey, buddy. Watch p.O.A.com. It's a lot of fun. You can catch me on the dollop this week on the pastimes, and go to bownesscori.com. That's me, extra stuff.

Trey. Where are you going to be? former guest on well-read alley clayton is going to be with me on a big long run through connecticut and new york upstate and the city both and the suburbs all over the place it's like a six-day six-day five city job so y'all come see us go to traycrouter dot com and then after that i'm going elsewhere all over all over dallas is coming up soon might be taping something that weekend Dallas people so need you to come out and yeah just make a hit go Watch Trey get buried by Allie Clayton.

And I said bonuscori.com. And for Trays, go to patreon.com slash Trey Crowder. And also, thank you all for listening to The Well Red Show. We love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next to week if you got nothing to do. Thank you. God bless you. Good night. We're screwed.

Thank you.