wellRED podcast - #63 - Trae and Drew Argue, Trump has Lawyer Trouble and OH YEAH WE BOMBED A COUNTRY

Episode Date: April 18, 2018

Trae and Drew argue about how Drew bails on plans, Corey talks about his Sinus Infection and how people leave the Trump administration quicker than Fozzie Bear gets to the punchline and oh yeah, WE MAY HAVE STARTED A NEW WAR! wellREDcomedy.com for our tour datesSMOKEY BOYS GRILLING Go grab some Hawg Rub and Beef rub from our pals and tell em we sent ya!

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion, because used to you, you like had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

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dot com slash well read today that's rocket money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast. They're the what is up everybody. It's your boy, the thuggish ruggish show. I'm sorry. I have so much sign of shit going on. I can hardly talk or swaller. But we got to get through this. Well red comedy dot god damn it. Well red comedy.com.com. W-E-L-L-R-E-D, Comedy.com, spelled just like the podcast.

Go there for tour dates. Tickets. Merch. All that good stuff. Y'all know the spiel. Also, Jesus Christ, I hope pollen is not as bad

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and enjoy this podcast where we talk in the Green Room in Fayetteville, Arkansas, about all this Trump shit and how plans don't hit for Drew and how I'm sick. Anyways, nothing hits. Love you all. Skew. Well, well, well.

Yeah, here we are. I want to start a fight with you. Okay. I'm sick, everybody. So what, Corey? Nobody's talking about or two. It's on the outside of the door. I mean, I assume that's what that switch is for.

He said the light don't hit, and I thought you said, I thought you said, I don't want to fight, don't hit. And I was like, we're not fighting. Okay. Shitting in the dark. But yeah, so we started this on the way over here and you was like, see, this is why we don't. Yeah, yeah. And I almost, and I wanted to keep going because you know me, but I was like, well, we're about to start the podcast.

We'll just save it for there because I know. Do you get to go first? I guess you brought it up, so you do. Like, you, like, plans just ain't plans for you, I've found. I mean, that's not true. You make a plan, but then if you decide, ah, I plan don't hit, you just, you just, this is a thing you do. If somebody annoys you, you extrapolate whatever they have done to annoy you into a character flaw that you ascribed to them. You do it with Corey all the time.

And what's funny about it is with Corey, it's often like when he don't want to hit, like he's sick or he is right now, or he's like trying to be a little sober and that don't hit for you because you want to party. not only are you like, it don't hear from me that you don't want to party, you're like, you always do this. This is what you do to me. Yeah, that, I mean,

you're right, but that's all, like, I'm self-aware about doing that too. Like, when I'm doing that to him, I know that I'm being shitty, and then also it's a thing.

And, I mean, don't get me wrong, it's only half joking, you know, like I am annoyed, but I realize that I'm shitty for being annoyed

and then it's shitty for me to say the things I'm saying to him. Well, that makes you're saying to him. It's fine to be a shitty person to your friend he's trying to get his life together. Okay, so having said that, let's talk about you. Well, let's tell the story.

Do you want to tell it? We get to the hotel here in Fayetteville, Arkansas. We get in it right at 5 o'clock. The show starts at 7, and we're close by, but it's weirdly cold here. It's mid-April. We're in the south, and I know we were both caught off guard by how cold it is. It's like not even 40 degrees. It's 38.

Yeah, it's really fucking cold. I have a little T-shirt, which I want to talk about later, too. And I also, me and you had both already talked about how we didn't pack anything warm at all. No jackets or nothing because we weren't expecting this. Right. So we get there. It's like, all right, what time are we going over there? Okay.

And you'd said, all right, so I'm calling the car because it's valet. I'm calling the car at six, leaving at 605. I said, sounds good. Yes. At about 5.30. It was 526. It's a group text situation. You and Corey had decided to go down the lobby bar.

and have a drink or whatever and i was still upstairs whiskey and a tea because his throat don't hit because it's sick right so then it like so then 15 between 15 20 minutes later at like 5 between 545 and 5 50 somewhere there you texted said tray i'm going with corey that was at 536 and we know that we know that cori we know that cori core we know that core core i'm going with cori meaning like now yeah i assume yes and so i did that on purpose by the way right but i have I was always planning on waiting on you, but I sent the I'm going with Corey. We're not waiting on you. That was just the fuck with you.

Okay. All right. Well, that makes it a little different. But here's the thing. You're going to say this is not true. But I feel like had I been like in the shower when that text was sent, and so I didn't see it or respond to it for seven or eight minutes, you'd have been gone. I would not have left you.

Well, okay. Well, I'll take your word for that. And then so it's not as egregious. Okay. I said at 545, you were right. Trey, I'm going to go with Corey. Come to if you want. Right now?

No, I'm literally walking down. And then I guess you saw come to it if you want because then you go, okay, well, yes. Y'all trying to strand me. No, you got a little time, baby. And then I wrote right after that, and this was definitely a joke. This is the part I was fucking with you on.

Okay, time's up. We're leaving. Right. Literally, I was walking to the bathroom when I said that. Okay. We'll see. I don't know none of that. And then you said, please, dude, I'm coming.

coming Dony leave. You tried to write Dony and you wrote it. I was in a hurry. I was like, he's leaving. Which I ain't got time to correct this grammar. Absolutely what I wanted. This whole thing started when you said that I changed plans all the time, which I do not do. And you were trying to act like I was like, I don't know, but here's what I actually did wrong.

I knew that I could stress you out because you always get stressed out and we're about to leave. And I absolutely did that on purpose. Okay. So it's the same thing as what I was, what I say I was doing to Corey. But the changing of plans things, hey, I don't do that all the time. And B, that's why I texted you. And if you had said, I can't do it by then, I would have waited on you. It was just a matter of.

My food came quicker than I expected. I ordered food at the bar. I was done and he still hadn't left. And I was like, well, if Trey can make it down, like, let's leave. But the way that I did that, yeah, but that's that way. The way you did it was too fuck with me because you knew that it would bother me. Which is, that absolutely is I have to own that as my greatest flaw slash most hidden thing about me. That's literally, that's the same as what I do with,

Corey that you said, like, well, if you acknowledge it, it's fine. It's the same. It's the same gene. Oh,

I'm sorry. I misunderstood what you're getting at. Yeah, because here's the thing. You did want to leave. You also knew that it would piss me off. And so that's why you went about it

the way that you did and you knew that it's a thing and that it would be, it would hit for you. And Corey. I was telling him the whole time, look how Matt Trajard. But you did really want to leave.

Yes. Well, it's just like with Corey and drinking. I do want Corey to drink with me, but I also know when I'm doing that whole, why do you always do this to me thing that it's like that it's a whole thing and that it's shitty and that I'm you know I'm doing it purpose I'm self-aware about it 100% when this started you said I changed plans all the time I said I literally don't even know what that mean like like I don't know where you're getting that and all I said was well that's not true you're doing that thing you do where you extrapolate something that don't hits for you and turn it into a flaw which you do do but buddy one thing that I'll say on a positive note about both of us is that And Corey, too, to a great extent, depends on what it is. I'd say, Corey's 80% this way.

If a flaw's real, we don't act like that ain't true. That's true, but I don't, hey, everybody, I've been taking the worst shit ever. I mean, it hit, it all came out. You and me going shit in the dark. And it was in the dark. Try to squeeze it out, but it was just a fart. I had my phone light on the floor, and it looked like it was a, like, are you afraid of the shit type situation?

to defend you on the whole... Talking to me, Drew. Drew, on the whole change and plan thing. That's a very me thing. And like, I'll admit to that. As you say, it's a flaw and it's real. I'll fucking come clean with that. Drew don't be doing that a lot.

Drew usually, like, he wants to leave at latest at possible. That was actually wild to me when Drew's like, we'll just go ahead and fucking go. I'm the one that, like, normally is like, yeah, I'll go with you guys. And then I'll get anxious and freak the fuck out and be like, God damn, I've got to get over there and do sound check. and I'll just leave.

I'll usually text, but I'll text as I'm leaving. It's not like, hey, if you want to come, because I've done that before, and you're like, you know, I'm on my way down, and then you take 15 fucking minutes, and it defeats the purpose of me leaving. It's like, I'll be doing that. That's the thing he does.

Do you tell Trey an earlier time than you mean? Always. You know he's five minutes later. Always. When you, whatever you say. Always. I have to do that to Amber, too. It's ridiculous.

Now that we've told him we do that, he'll be 10 minutes later. He won't remember, because this is not. Even for us, this is pretty inside baseball. we're literally talking about the ends and outs of our road relationship. Well, people like, people like to hear about our bullshit. And I know. Opening up to our world. I can't talk.

This sucks. Your throat's fucked up. You're sick. I'm a little sick, dude. This is horrible. I think you gave it to me in L.A. But I don't, but I'm not. But you know, I can take, well, you have a sinus infection.

I can smell it on you. That's a weird thing. We'll talk about that. That's some hippie shit. Yeah. I can smell sinus infections. It makes sense now that you say it. And I can, now that you said it, I can taste it.

I can taste it. I was about to say that. Yeah, but I didn't at first. I was just like, I got shitty breath, but I haven't smoked a cigarette in four days, so normally I don't have shitty breath. This is a weird thing to say. It's not that bad to me. It doesn't stink to me.

I just know what it is. It's just musty. And Andy gets one, I'm like, you have, I can smell. It smells like my dog. My dog, I can taste it when I get one time. My dog will be having yeast in his ears from time to time. It smells yeasty, you're right. It smells yeasty, and my breath tastes like my dog's ear smell.

Well, it's an infection. Well, do I? Right. Do I smell like that to you all the time? No, not all the time, but I have told you before that I can smell your sinus infection. I almost said yeast infection accidentally, and it would have been sound like I was trying to make like a, like a douche hit. I smell your yeast infection, bro.

It would make sense because I ate two loaves of sourdough bread by myself this week. Well, that has live yeast in it. Is that what you're getting at? Yeah. Yeah. Because I've been on a kick since we went to that place and where we at. It was fire. What was it?

So good. It wasn't in Malibu, was it? It was in a... Have we talked about me and you driving to Malibu? It was Malibu. And then I just fell... I just fell asleep. We drove all the way to Malibu to drive up the coast,

and then we were going to go to Santa Monica. We went to eat... And I'm still out from that. It was mediocre. Corey felt so bad that we had to just go home. That was an hour from your house, Tray. Mm-hmm. We drove an hour to get lunch.

Well... All right. Go ahead. Were you about to say something? No, I was just going to say he all... Before y'all even went to Malibu, he had already... He had slept.

like at least 11 or more hours the night before and then you came and picked him up and y'all drove to Malibu and then he fell asleep while you were there slept the whole way back and then slept for more hours when you got back to your Airbnb came straight back to your house and sleep podcast listeners that's where the tray's kids thought Corey was dead story came from came over to your house tray and was like Corey's dead because that was when you were sick yeah well it's gotten worse and I've got it or I've got something I kind of think about the allergies this is my first spring in Tennessee and four years what my doctor I mean That wouldn't surprise me at all because East Tennessee is near the top.

I know I've seen articles before that lists Knoxville is the worst city for allergies. And asthma. For seasonal allergies, wherever it is. East Tennessee is just really, really bad for pollen and all that shit. Are you at all interested in that? Because I grew up with allergies and asthma. Like, I got shots every week and I had an asthma doctor. So I know all about it.

And, like, it's a whole thing. East Tennessee has the highest rates of asthma. in the world. I have been told by many people that I know that have asthma. I don't know if you have or not that I probably have some mild form of asthma because I may have explained this to you. Sometimes when I sneeze, it literally takes me like a full minute.

I'll sneeze and then I do this for like a full fucking minute. Like I can't catch my goddamn breath. And one of my buddies is like, I think you got asthma because I got asthma and that happens. I think you just have strokes, man. Yeah, it could be strokes. You stay having strokes. And it's something like it's so green. and lush in East Tennessee.

There's just so much pollen. And then like the mountains. The mountains? Keep it from like... Leaving. Discipating. Yeah, right. Yeah, it keeps it like kind of contained.

Our mountains trap a lot of the East Coast smog. The jet stream actually moved south across that part of the United States. So a lot of the East Coast smog hovers over the Smokies. Some people say, I don't know if this is true, that that's why the smokies are blue, that they weren't always. I don't know if that's true. But they trapped... Well, that would be a bummer.

to find them. They trap the pollen and they capture the smog. It's literally a fucking cocktail of shit. So like what makes the smokies, the smokies is fucking Yankee pollution? I don't believe it. That don't have for me at all.

I refuse to believe. Yeah, that don't make sense if they took their bullshit and made it pretty. I think that's an old wife's tale though because... Right. Just something that they blot. Well, but that's not a thing to blame though. Like that, that is. You know what I mean? You took credit for it, probably. Right. Yeah. Well, also, man, and this is true, like in the past couple years

it's gotten worse just because we have not gotten as much rain on account of the environment and shit like that. No, no, that's just Georgia. And you guys need to stop taking our water, Corey. I've been going to talk to you about that. Well, that's fine. I'm on your team.

I'm on your team. Our buddy and friend of the podcast, DJ Lewis, who you guys are familiar with, he actually was part of an entire piece on the Daily Show about this very controversy. It was, and I went with him and good God, damn, they were not ready for his ass. No, they were funny.

That's one of my favorite stories ever. I actually, we're not kidding, by the way. It's a real daily show piece from a few years ago. Daily show, butt chugging. But chugging, yeah. I want me and Al Madrigal's path to cross and then like soon in L.A. So I could be like, you know Earl knows him pretty well. They're both on, I'm dying up here.

Right. I want to talk to him be like, you remember this fucking dude? Because that's my, I don't think, because DJ never said I'm a stand-up comedian. No, I don't remember how they found it. It wasn't through that. It was on Facebook. Yeah, there was a comment section of this. thing that the Daily Show was they were basically they were researching this particular article

about Georgia Still in Tennessee's water or whatever and DJ had gone on there and just went fucking in and I think they clicked on his profile seen his picture and was like well and he again when we went there he never like told like yeah by the way I'm a stand-up comedian he was just like yeah I'll talk to you about water by these goddamn railroad tracks 100% deserve that because the day show usually does a good idea of like they play gotcha but they play gotcha with people in their actual element. Number one... And sometimes they get to

get the motherfuckers what they got. Right, but number one, they picked DJ because they heard him talk. They saw how he was going in. They saw his picture and they were like,

well, this dude's an idiot. It'll be funny on its own. Look at his tattoos and how white trashy is. A. And B, do you remember that they had quote, unquote,

hunters? Yep. Part of that piece. I was about to... I was about to bring that up. Like, that actually, like... It kind of broke my heart.

That did hit for me because DJ was funny on it and it was just a wild thing and all that. But like, honestly that that whole experience which i only was an indirect experience for me because it was my buddy that was part of it but like drove in there that uh yeah it kind i kind of lost a lot of respect for the daily show and just because i you can say it i can't i'll when i cross

past them i'm going to bring that up well i don't know how much that was you know i mean that could have been a thing i'll be honest with you man court of dj was his piece it was his piece but like and like According to DJ, he picked them hipsters out and said y'all be hunter. But anyway, yeah, the fact, I don't remember that part. Oh, dude, I do. Yeah, they had these two. I think he meant he don't remember. I don't remember Al doing that.

I'm saying I was there. Like, there was a, there was a, yeah, I don't know who did it. There was like a team. And from what I can tell, I asked these guys, I said, oh, so you'll work for the daily show. They're like, no, no, no, they contract us out. We're just here filming or whatever. And we work for this yada, yada conglomerate, whatever shit. Al just seemed like, I'm here to be funny.

He was super fucking nice. you know he was like oh this is a DJ Rob. Yeah like I don't he didn't seem like he didn't seem like he didn't seem like he was the one doing the gotcha shit. He seems like all that was taken care of and then Al just shows up and is funny. But it's kind of weird if the daily show is outsourcing literally the crux of the piece. I think it was just a piece kind of like yeah I mean you're right but again like he was a very cool dude and like it never seemed like he was sitting there going like all right I'm going to set this up when you guys do this. But what it could have been if you as far as outsourcing it goes I mean it could have been. He could have earlier told him to do that.

Well, it was described to them, like, here's what we need for this from you guys. So go find this for us. And then no guys. If they told, like, you know, a production company in Chattanooga, find us some hunters that they just, like, called their brother. Oh, shit. Yeah, because I forgot I ended up drinking with one of the dudes. I know him. His name's Trey Cook.

What up, Trey? Just, I mean. What up, Trey? But, yeah, well, you know, that they just said, yeah, we need. We need a couple hunters, a couple good old boys or something for this, and then those guys maybe. Who live in downtown Chattanooga.

Right, found these dudes. You're like, I mean, y'all could do that, right? And then, you know. And that makes the daily show a little more innocent. But like, but again, dude, if the daily shows production people were like, yeah, we'll just tell a production company to find some hunters, they'll be able to do it, the assumption that a downtown Chattanooga or Atlanta production company

can just go get hunters in a week. You know what I mean? Well, kind of. But what other choice did they have? You know what I mean? Like, I mean, Corey is a Chattanooga comedian, and he can fucking find those guys like that. Too sweet.

I mean, hell, man, you were Knoxville comedians, and I could have found those guys if they asked me to. But in Atlanta production company, think about the Knoxville production companies, who do we know from there? Jared, he's from fucking somewhere in North Carolina. Elliot, Chicago. My point being is,

I don't know what my point is. I'm stupid. I just feel like they probably, It makes sense to me that they would expect an entity like that to have that capability. You're saying the thought process wasn't everybody down there and those hunters. It was like they should be able to do this. You're right. Yeah, yeah.

Right. And they got hosed almost. Yeah, it may not even have known. You know what I mean? They just showed up and it's like, okay, those are the guys. They were just like, yeah, that's fine. Whatever. Let's roll with it.

I've been mad about this piece for years and now. It always kind of pissed me off, too. I'm kind of getting over it. I also didn't, I never knew until he said that, that it was like outsourced or whatever in that way. That seemed like what it was to me. And I mean, I said all that to say this, the water's what knocks the pollen away. And so it's been worse. It's been worse.

And so that's why I feel like shit. Wouldn't the water trap it, though, too? It just, I mean, it knocks it off the leaves and gets it out of the air. Like, because when it's dry, when it's dry and the wind blows, the pollen just fucking is in the air. But when it's wet, the pollen stays on the ground. I don't know shit about the science. of this. But that doesn't check out to me because East Tennessee is the like the worst region in the

country for all that shit. Uh-huh. And East Tennessee gets more rain per year than the Pacific Northwest. That doesn't have anything to do. That has, but numbers wise, numbers wise, that doesn't have anything to do with pollen production. East Tennessee is one of the worst for pollen production. So like the rain, it's still bad in terms of pollen production. The rain doesn't take that away.

It just, it eases the, you know, you coughing up. blood and shit because pollen only it when it's in the air you breathe it in when the rain knocks it down it's on the ground it ain't you know that's when it rains it hits like a I love rain in the spring because I can just go out and fucking yeah man just like oh this is nice well as riveting is but I guarantee you y'all still have more because y'all got a lot of bees and shit y'all got honey farms and shit in California it's no east Tennessee oh yeah we do yeah that's what I'm saying well that that all makes sense you're supposed to eat the honey it's supposed to help with allergies I need to do that I forgot that's right

And bee pollen too, eating to bee pollen. Oh, maybe that's what it is. With both, maybe I guess. I've heard what you're talking about local honey. If you live in a place, you eat local honey, it's supposed to help with the average use. I stopped taking my motherfucking bee pollen like a son of a bitch. He was.

And taking shits and jacking off like a wild man. God, I love that shit. I could get back on beep pollen. Which is just started because we were calling you the bee. You were, and I was literally the only reason you took bee piling. Well, it was that, and I was on Pete Holmes podcast. You heard Pete Holmes say it and Dan Cook also said it? Yeah, and he was like, they said something about,

bee pollen he's like i've been like getting boners and taking shits and i was more interested in the shits part because like boners i got that you know what i'm saying in spades but uh the shits thing and i started taking b pawn and got damn cook stole his idea for bee pollen too like louis was like let's take bee pollen that was stupid that's okay i can edit that if you want me too no leave it in i want everyone to judge me we also the reason his head is called the b is because we said that you know, his head, he looks swollen.

Yeah, yeah, it looks like he got stung by a bunch of bees all at once in the head. So part of that... Sucked off a beehive. That was your restaurant. Part of that was

back then, part of that lore was body by V's. Body by V's. Which is Corey selling a... A pun on Body by Vee

which is a pyramid scheme. It was actually body by Vives. Right? Body by Viz. I always read it. By the way, I made that pun. Byte by V's.

Because you thought it was body by Vee. I literally thought it was body by Vee. I didn't know what it was. Well, either way. I knew it was stupid. The idea was Corey walking out, like in a commercial, it's like, would you, do you want a body like mine or whatever? And then it was, he's just like got bees crawling all over his head all time and his body.

And 35% of the country was like, yes, I do. And so, but that was years ago. Yeah. And then what was it, like two or three weeks ago, there was some article that we saw. Oh, yeah. It was like a month or two ago. Or some lady really did that. that and it killed her.

She was getting acupuncture by bees. That's a thing now. Bs, natural acupuncture. What do you mean? Dude, this was in the group text and I immediately, he sent the article. To make bees stinging them? Yes, they used B stingers. When was this?

When was this? God damn, I can't believe I'm even saying this out loud. Lord Jesus, what a fucking world. You responded to it. You must have been hammer or something. I was about a month ago, something like that. On the group text, I got to stop drinking. He sent an article about that.

I'm certain that at the time. Acupuncture by, and I immediately I was like, body by bees. Holy shit. Oh my God. I don't remember this. I was drunk. It's a thing now, like acupuncture with bees and then so growing out of a goddamn

allergic reaction. That's just called getting stung and not hitting. Yeah, don't hit it all. Well, and she died. Yes. Good. I mean, I'm sorry. Like, I know that we're supposed to be the, as I say now, he-by-diffy-div-lovy-dubys.

That's a fucking cook bit. Really? The, he was talking about it's like, I'm sorry. Sometimes the way people eat it is just funny to me. Yeah, he's an article about this lady that got killed by bees, you know, and I just couldn't help. But you remember, you know what I'm talking about. Yes, I do know what you're talking about now. B's like, I would punch every bee in the face.

I thought it would punch a shark in the bed. Well, like, you know, that's a different thing. If I just find out that somebody guys. Sometimes I'm like, he got a bad rap. If I just. And other times I'm like, God damn, dude. Somebody used to love that bees, but he was awesome. He used to have for me.

So hard. I told you I watched. But his Bays bit was his shark bit. I told you. I told you I told you I watched Viz's a shark in the face. Just to see. see? No, me and you did. Yeah, we were together.

Mr. Butt. It's still hit. Me, you and Mr. Butt. It still hit. He was watching Dane Cook and, uh... Oh, my God. It did still hit, and there was, he has that one bit, me and you both, and we were... It's so dark.

We were real high. But it, dude, I'm not watched it again since. We were watching it, and he has this bit about crying uncontrollably. It's the void. And I remember when that, I remember when that came out, I was a big Dane Cook fan at the time. I did my best! So I watched it new, and so I was like 20 or something like that. Yeah, that's when everybody was a fan.

Right. And so, and I remember at 20, that bit about uncontrollably crying, honest, at the time, I was kind of like, what? I don't really, what's he, like, this is kind of funny, but I had already had a failed suicide attempt. So I really got it actually. Yeah. And, but then. Yeah, I really connected.

We, but we watched it not long ago. And it hurt to watch. Grown, stoned men. and I remember sitting there watching it and I was like, dude, this is dark as fuck. Not only is it dark as fuck. That's a really good album title, Grown, man. Not only is it dark as fuck. And that was on Vicious Circle, wasn't it?

Yeah. Not only is it dark as fuck, go watch that on Vicious Circle. It's just a dance. It's such a good performance. Yeah. I mean, he's client. Well, he was always. Oh, yeah.

Well, for sure. But in this one, A, it's a funny bit. B, it's so fucking relatable. But like, it is one in them that as you grow, that bit becomes more. It means something to you at every age, but now we were watching, and we was high and I almost had a fucking panic attack watching that shit the whole like I did my best I've done that shit man I did that shit last week to be fair you're always right next to a panic attack that's true dude it just sits right there listen we're not we're not at all in the

weeds I think it's going well but like we kind of we stay in the weeds to talk about Russia and Syria right yeah for sure what time I'm on stay I might have to leave fair enough before we do I wanted before that though I wanted to talk we also haven't talked about the lawyer because that happened the day after we recorded the law last one and i wanted to talk to you about it because you know you a lawyer so before we get into that real quick can i just tell y'all how upset i am that y'all didn't get my shirt first off i liked it a lot more for you pulled it down that was really hitting for me just mean my belly just making all the words pull it up again during him wearing a belt my belly's hanging out

you just don't wear belts no more so drew has on a yellow shirt and black lettering on the front it just says he looks like charlie drew looks like charlie frown It's the only time I can make a Charlie Brown joke about somebody Because usually that's... Oh, because my shirt's yellow and it's got the black squiggle thing right there. It's a yellow shirt with black lettering on the front that says, Damn, I'm good. The lettering is velvet and it's that 70s press on stuff.

Someone knock. Yeah, come in. One second. What's up? You're fine. Okay. It sounds good. Six-fitty.

Oh, so 20 minutes? Six-fif. 47. You got 20 minutes? Oh, hell yeah. All right. Thank you, Brandy. Can you come get me again?

Brandy. Brandy. She's a fine girl. Okay. Thank you. Your voice of God in me, by the way. Okay, by the way. So I have on this bright yellow shirt, it's got velvet black lettering.

It says, damn, I'm good. Before you explain to origin, let me explain to you my reaction to it. Yeah, because I was curious about that. I thought you got it immediately. So we walked in the green room. I've been with Trey in this shirt, but I was driving. You were in the back seat. I hadn't said.

you had seen it. I walked in. I was on the phone with Enterprise because they got, as you said, hobo jizz all over your shirt. Trey got something sticky all over his back in the back. We just ran into a car today and the fucking back seat is covered in what appears to be goddamn either ant-com or, you know, Saup, just, yeah, Warren Sap, Tree Sap, whatever.

But it's, that's what Hobo Come is, Warren Sapp. Like Warren's Saps, Warren Sap. Yeah, Warren Sap. Yeah, that's the title of the podcast. We're going to end up having to talk about Syria, Warren Sapp. Yeah. There it is. So, yeah, that happened.

But anyway, we get in here. We get into the green room. I'm like, fucking with the wine, I turn around and you've taken, like, do you have a shirt on over it? Or is I just? No, you just didn't see me in the front. So I turned around and see me earlier. I had on my serious shirt shirt. I turned around and look at you and immediately, I'm just like, the reason I did that was because, and I thought you knew this when I did it, I was still annoyed with you about the whole thing.

that we talked about at the top of the podcast. I didn't really get to appreciate that as much. So, like, I was... And I mostly did it for you. I was annoyed. I wanted you to see him get annoyed because that hits for you. So I was annoyed with you, and then I turned around, and you're standing there with... With a fucking shirt on, so it's, damn, I'm good.

Bright yellow. Damn I'm good shirt. Just like smiling at me. And so that's why I was just like, God damn. And then you go, God damn it, and I thought you were jealous. Right, which makes sense. But no, I was just like... It is a cool shirt.

So then we talked about it. You didn't get it. So then I was like, fuck. I'm a shame, by the way. But then he didn't get it. I think it's not as iconic as I thought it was. So then I asked Corey, do you get this joke? And then you said the midnight.

Midnight Swinger, my buddy, comedian, we've talked about him before. He has his, uh... It's funny, though, that you thought that Drew would have a midnight swing. I know, I don't know why. I heard it as the Midnight Rambler, which in my head, I was like, that's a Burr-Rennels movie. Well, first off, let me explain right now. You guys didn't enjoy that hit and I'm mad about it. Go ahead.

I wasn't even, I'm sorry, I suck. It's okay. Drew had talked about earlier in the text that he was wearing Nefcho shirt because he didn't have no shirts or whatever. And in my mind, I was like, he worked with the Midnight Swinger. Midnight Swinger gave him that shirt or something like that. And he just happened to have it in a bag because he worked out in or something. And that's what I connected all those really quick. And that's just because when I first saw it, this is the first thing I thought was,

that's a sweet shirt. But that is the least Drew shirt I've ever seen. That's why I'm upset that it's not as obvious as I thought it was. But I didn't, you know, I didn't. shit on you. That's why I'm saying I'm saying. Now that you've pointed out what it is and I've seen and like, I mean, dude, I've absolutely

saying. Because you're not a vanity t-shirt type dude. Not at all. Right. It is. It is. It is an iconic picture. I almost pointed it out. Unless you're Del Earnhardt. Because I was thinking when I saw you wearing I was like, if I was wearing this, this motherfucker will be

giving me shit right now. Absolutely. Right. But I didn't because I'm a good boy. Right. So the picture, the shirt, ladies and gentlemen, I was hammered. I'm going to take a. picture of you shed on a bender you know I was hammered

yeah what are you having seven weeks now you still on that no no this is the first one because the sickness well actually there's there's an argument you made that I got sick because I stopped that's an argument that I'll support withdrawals that's what that is

I went through them but they don't hit but my man Corey Forster told me that a good way to do with withdraws is to dabble in the mushrooms that is 100% true So anyway, I was hammered drunk. I was talking to Andy, I think, or somebody about how much Dale Earnhardt hits, and she didn't care. And I was telling her about how he had, I was like, I mean.

She's Dale Dickey, Earnhardt. And I was like, I'm pretty sure, Andy. He was like a fucking rookie, or it was early on when he won Tal Dager some shit. And he hopped out the car and undid his jumpsuit. And it had that shirt on it said, damn, I'm good. And then I was like. I bet somebody makes that shirt. So I got online drunk.

For God, I did this. This shirt just came in the mail, and I didn't know what it was, which is phenomenal. Dude, everything about that story. Me and Corey is the ones that don't hit. No, yeah, 100%. That's why I ain't giving you shit. So if you don't know, there's a very iconic picture of Dale Earnhardt as a young driver. He won a big race early on.

He jumped out of his car right after winning the race, and he rips open his jumpsuit with the pop buttons. And he has a T-shirt on underneath it says, damn I'm good as if he planned to win because he did of course he did or he just wore that every week and the shirt that I have on is literally a replica it's the same color it's the same kind of 70s velvet lettering no yeah but if you look at the picture I mean it's literally exactly that but if you don't get that yeah what you see is a pot-bellied 33 year old bearded drunk hipster kid yes yeah yeah shirt that does not fit him and that's what I saw that says damn I'm

And that's what I saw, and I thought, my God, he really is leaning into becoming me. Like, this is really just fucking coming full-sart. This ain't the same thing. And by the way, I wore this shirt tonight because it's the last show we have in the South for a long time. Oh, it is. Thinking, oh, people in Arkansas will get it probably. And now what I think is going to happen is I'm about to walk on the stage at the Walmart Center. And everyone's going to be like, oh, here's the damn I'm good guy.

Plenty of people here. We sell them. God, damn it. Plenty of people here will get it. plenty of them will not because we but also people ain't like us they're not i thought it was 50 50 people ain't like us they're not gonna be like fuck this guy i thought it was 50 50 50 i thought this was a 50 50 shirt but in my mind y'all we're part y'all were 95 5 so when we's kids we used to kick the shit out of chris and robbie's little brother bubba chase and uh we used to always also make him go do

stuff for us he'd just come down but i chase go do this or we'll kick the shit out of you and uh he was about 10, I guess. And one day he came down and we were like, Chase, go get us our beer from the basement or we'll kick the shit out of you. And he just pulled his shirt up and on his chest and belly, he had written the words no, written the word no. He just went like this and then took off sprinting and we just died laughing and we never fucked with him again after that because he knew he was like, they're going to ask me to do

something and I'm going to fucking. So that's kind of earned hard. And he predicted it. He did. Yeah. And he's, no. that shirt and what you just said about it what everybody else sees when I see me

in this reminded me of something I hadn't thought about in years when I was in high school there's about to be a lot of ravenry and a whole lot of ravenry in this story I cannot wait when I was in high school I bought this this black t-shirt with white lettering that said NWO

it said genius on it but it was spelled with a J and I that in my mind that was me being like I'm self-aware of it. I'm self-aware. Y'all all think I'm a genius,

but I'm not. Even though you thought you was. Even though I thought I was. I was smart enough to realize that you're not think that. So I did think I was, but I also was making fun of them for thinking I was. That's what I thought.

Can we do a sketch about you called Goodwill Hunting, but it's just you shopping? Right. When you were a kid. I think we, I feel like that's been a... We've said that before. DJ is like me,

Goodwill hunting, but I'm hunting for like... Goodwill clothes or something. You were at the Goodwill looking for clothes. Like, that's you shopping. DJ used to have that joke where he was talking about. He's like, yeah. He goes, I used to get my clothes from Goodwill.

Not in the store. Are you shitting me? Mama would just throw us in that fucking donation dumpster at night. And he'd come and he goes, one of these goddamn sleeves is too long. I'm wearing fucking pants as a shirt. No, I'm pretty sure that... That's where dumpster swag.

One thing, yeah, it is. One thing that I say a lot, because it's true, is that when I graduated high school from Salina, I left there thinking that I was goodwill hunting. And I'm pretty sure one of the times I said that around y'all, one of y'all was like, yeah, you was goodwill hunting, but that was just when your mama took your clothes shop and whatever, which that's hilarious. Your goodwill hunting. You're goodwill hunting. Everybody else is hunting goodwill. Yeah. But anyway, at a black t-shirt. That's the sketch.

Hunting Goodwill's. A black shirt in white letters, genius, but with a J. But here's the other raven part of it. So many people that I went to school with had no idea. Did not realize that that's not how you spell genius. You don't say. And so we're like, you know, like, oh my God, Trace, seriously, you really are where, you know what I mean? I bet you they could spell queer, fine.

both these and that motherfucker i say so many it was i guarantee they could not you're right yeah it was a k w e e r it don't matter spellings for queers yeah but uh yeah and i mean there were plenty of people who that it was true about but you know also plenty of my buddies that's exactly what i was doing i don't i'm not implying that everybody went to high school with couldn't spell fucking genius but there was enough of them But there was enough of them that couldn't. That it was still funny. Yeah, like everybody in this country isn't a racist, misogynistic bag of shit.

But there's enough of them. Right. To where it's kind of affected things. That's a good segue. I did that on purpose. Dude, were y'all with me recently? I was going to own that a little bit like you really believe in your... I mean, I am good.

Right. It's a hitting fucking shirt. But this is coming from someone who'd wear that shirt unironically. But if it fit me, I would give it to you. now that I know no one understands it, but it don't even look at me. Oh, son, that makes it hit harder. I know. Well, it makes it look more ironic.

You know what I look like in Judah Friedlander. Yeah, yeah. I look like Judah Friedlander, like world champion right now. That's a very Judah Friedlander. Well, dude, he already had that. He's been wearing a hat with it all day. If I was wearing that shirt, I would look like police tape melted to a tapeworm. It would not hit.

I don't even know what that means. I hope that old. There's caution tapeworms are. flat. I know what tapeworms are. I hope he somehow comes up with... Paint monkey. Paint monkey are.

Oh, yeah. A guy who does... Paint monkey art is a guy who follows us and he makes sketches of us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that stuff. I like that stuff. I am suggesting at this point to him

that he make a sketch of Corey wearing, and I quote, police tape with a tape worm. What did you say? Melt it into it. I said I would look like a tape worm, but not a tape worm. I'm thinking of them big ass, fat-ass worm.

Like a grub worm Grub worm Yeah I'm a grub worm If I was wearing that shirt I would look like a You ain't the one that's so skinny It's clear Yeah I would look like

Police tape melted to a grub worm The only reason I said The only reason I said tapeworm Is because you know what tapeworms do Like They're parasites Yeah the women Women like eat the tapeworm

And then they're like The tapeworm eats everything I eat And they shit the tapeworm So eventually the tapeworm Do balloon up and get big Now they just get longer Are you saying women do that on purpose? to lose weight.

That was a thing. That was a thing. That's like a Snopes thing, though, I think. Sure. I watched, it was an episode of the office. Kelly didn't. I watched it two nights ago. It's the most white privileged thing I think I've ever heard.

To get a tapeworm on purpose. You can find ads from, and I do this. Back in the day, because again, it's one of those things where like some people say that. That in leeches. Oh, that wasn't really a thing. They didn't really do that. Oh, they did. You can find ads and stuff from like the 50s or whatever for Housewives where you could order a tapeworm

to ingest and then yeah it would consume and you take a pill and you shit it out you would consume so you wouldn't gain weight from it in the office yeah in the office episode

Kelly's like I think that's one of those apocryful things that ain't really true I think it's true too but on the office I was like yeah I got this tapeworm so I eat it

and then it eats all the stuff I eat and then I take a pill and I shit it out and then she's like Creed sold it to me and in true office fashion it cuts right to Creed.

He goes, yeah, that wasn't a tapeworm. And that was all that was to it. So that's probably a nod to the whole, like, it was never real. What about that guy? Unreal. He was so old. Have he been in anything else? Creed, dude, he was in a rock band.

You know what he was? The grass roots or the, the grass roots or the, he was in a rock band for like. He plays himself in the office. Creed Bratton was the base player for, I want to say the, not the new grass revival. Buddy, what a life. What a life. Somebody do a documentary on him right now. He does a one-man show now.

My phone don't work in here. God damn it. Where's producer Bryce when you need him? He's dead. He died like a bitch. I don't mean wrap it up. I mean, let's... Voodoo Quinn brought him back in New Orleans,

only for him to die immediately again. Well, truly a sad story. What band creed was it? The grassroots, I believe it was. He died in New Orleans. What had happened was, we tried to buy illegal drugs, and Bryce was with us,

and he lost his life. May he rest in peace. Um, Trey, did you want to ask me about Michael Cohen? Yeah, so, and I'm just going to go ahead and say, I don't know shit. I'll say that. I'm going to come back with the answers to two questions why you're talking about this, A, about the tapeworms and B about Curry's Bamb, but yeah. What's the question about the tapeworms? Like how much of a thing, I'm sure at least a couple, it came from somewhere, but like how much of a thing was it really is what I'm trying to figure out.

That was a grape worm. I can smell. I ain't got good. service back here in his green room so nothing's happening but anyway so did um they rated it was the southern district in new york yes uh rated the which by the way the head of that district was just a replacement for the guy trump fired pre prerara yes yeah right and that guy's time and also we watch billions if anybody's listening if anybody's listening to watches billions That's Chuck.

Yes. And Chuck is played by Paul Giami. Paul Giami's character, his job in that show, is, that's his job in real life. It's the guy we're talking about, was Prit Barra, and now this, what's his name now? I can't remember his name, but here's the thing. He was just a stand-in because they fired free. But it's not Robert Mueller is what I'm getting at. Robert Mueller.

That's my understanding. Yeah, I hear people say, I say Mueller all the time, and then I heard some people say Mueller, and then all I hear is Mueller, and I don't know. But can I say this? It doesn't matter. Of course it don't. I don't be saying stuff right. Turn some shit over to the Southern District of New York, but it wasn't Mueller's team or his investigation that made this move,

which I feel like is important to distinguish. It's huge. It's also just politically and historically interesting to put in context that Barrara was fired. This guy was just next in line. He's not permanent. He's probably going to be gone by June or July. but like official like excuse me unafit like his time will be up in juniors alive but he will remain the boss till they replace him

but that's a process yes mr butt it's unbelievable how poetic justice this is seaman where trump fired a guy and his replacement ends up fucking his lawyer over okay but so they raided the offices hotel room which is where he lived okay so that's the same as private red So the office's hotel room was like a car. Do you mean in Trump Tower? He lived in Trump Tower. Maybe he had another hotel room I didn't know about. No, they rate, I'm just saying they rated all of it.

All this dude's shit. Trump's personal lawyer. Yes. And I was reading all these people just commenters on Reddit and stuff, which is what I texted you about and wanted to ask you about because I don't fucking know. Saying that like, that's a huge deal and it's insane because like for any Jut to get a judge to sign off on a no-knock warrant for an attorney's, right, like, because that's violating attorney-client privilege, which you can do, but only in very specific cases,

it needs to be pretty ironclad, and it's when, when the attorney is party to, is, is facilitating the commission of a crime or covering one of, right, right, yeah. So, so that's all true then. That's all true. And also, and I didn't verify. this but the guy who said it he's pretty legit he's a prosecutor uh and the contributor i can't remember his name he contributes to you know cnn and fox and all that there's grassroots core yeah there have been like 30 examples of a federal judge of that level of an attorney general's office getting a warrant for a turn for a lawyer's office There was an arrest in every, I'm sorry, there was a conviction in every case.

Right. And on top of that. Conviction or plea. Which is. And on top of that, I'm just assuming literally none of those attorneys were the attorney to a sitting U.S. president. No. Right. So like I'm saying, this is like a perfect example of how normalized insanity has become under trial.

Right. This is like one craziest thing that's ever happened is fucking insane. Like even the action. There been five indictments in here. a year. Even the action itself is very rare and hard to pull off. And it happened specifically to the attorney for a sitting U.S. president, which makes it a whole other level of absolute fucking lunacy. Michael Cohen is going down. If anyone's wondering, if you haven't kept up with it or you don't know the jargon or whatever, what he's going down for, he used, he, I don't.

used PAC political action committee funds to pay a woman off which is a misappropriation

it's illegal you can't do that which is a felony I can't believe they haven't found a way

to somehow codify that you absolutely can use campaign funds to pay off a whore or

yeah because they help the campaign that's what I'm sure I can't believe they haven't I mean

we're very pro sex worker on this podcast for sure yeah they definitely help

or he lied and or he lied to he got that loan from a bank as a home equity loan.

He had to write to get a home equity loan. I think it was a home equity loan or maybe a credit line loan on his house. I don't know. It was on property as the backup, as the collateral for the loan. He had to write what the purpose was for. You can't lie on those. So he's going down. The question that remains is he going to take Trump with him.

So far, I mean, he literally seems to love Trump. I saw this one person on TV who made a really good point. They were like, look at what Michael Cohen said, about Trump and they showed a bunch of clips. And he was like, whether what he said was real or not talking about how he feels about Trump, he was like, this guy clearly loves Donald Trump. It feels like he's a mentor to him. He's like, he's probably not going to turn on him.

So didn't he straight up admit to giving Stormy Daniels mind? He said, yeah, I did that shit. There's no reason for him to deny it at this point. It's so clear that he did. Right. But then Trump is like, I had no knowledge of doing that, which makes it look even more damning. didn't say I didn't fuck her.

He never said, he said, I didn't know he paid her off, but he never said there was no reason to pay her off or none of that. But it makes it look more damning because let's say hypothetically Trump didn't know

that he paid him off. If this dude paid her off without saying anything to Trump, that means this motherfucker knew what the, what time it was. Like he never came to Trump and said,

hey man, should I give her $150,000? Right. And for him go, no, no, fuck her. Don't do that. Dude, there's just

100% plausible. Well, But here's the issue with that. Also, I mean, I'm going to give a fucking if he fucked her. It was Cohen's money. Right. You really have to love a dude to give $130,000 of your money and not talk to him about it. I'm sure it was something where, because he's a logger.

That's him going, this will come back threefold to me. Trump's a lizard, billionaire businessman. Like, I'm sure there was some way. He lives in Trump Tower for free, guys. Right. I'm saying, I'm sure there was something where, yeah. They purposely made it to where Trump didn't know anything about it and had nothing to do with it. But, like, dude.

As a lawyer, that's the. right fucking as a buddy yeah you don't need to know about but there's no fucking way before I leave because I'm about

to have to leave I just want to say this I'm going to miss it by one or two percent but I'm not going to get it all the way wrong because I just read it Obama's turnover rate

in terms of like secretary of state people getting fired and people coming in switching jobs his entire eight years five percent Trump's in one year

dude it's 32 percent Trump's is but I remember when That's how many motherfuckers have come and gone. And don't, and I'm so sick of this. Well, yeah, they got in there and they weren't doing the right job. And Trump fucking, no, these motherfuckers know something.

And as soon as they know something, bye. And if somebody pointed out, come in. Come in. Is it time for us to do the show? Okay. We're going to have to pause for a second because I have to God mic him. I can talk to myself for a minute. Okay.

Well, we're at, go ahead. We can pause it. I can do that. What do you want me do? Just let it run. I'll talk. All right. No, yeah.

Look at him. He's got a damn I'm good shirt. He's the guy. He's the guy for it. Go hit, Corey. But yeah, so they're going to start the show. Drew will be right back. He's just got to bring Corey up on stage.

But Corey was just saying these motherfuckers clearly know something. And as soon as they know something, they're out, I don't know that I think that's what's happened. My take on it is more like... Growing a business brings pressure. It's not easy to maintain momentum and still keep employees engaged. Fortunately, there's Insperity. Their scalable HR solutions help me with hiring, training, HR administration, and compliance while giving my employees competitive benefit options. When my people are able to thrive, my business can adapt and prosper.

With Insperity, nothing seems impossible. Insperity, HR that makes a difference. the only people that they can get to work for this administration are people that are willing to look the other way with stuff like that or are somehow in one regard or another morally and ethically compromised. Not all of them, but most of them. and so when that's the case it's not surprising that those people have trouble holding down these extremely high profile and high you know level of responsibility type of positions within the u.s. government you know because there's a shitload of scrutiny there so when you are filling positions like that with people that are you know morally dubious even by the standard the historical standard

set by the American government you know it's not surprising that you're going to see this type of turnover and then that coupled with the type of person that they're working for obviously Trump who's extremely thin-skinned

and who is you know he if you if you're at a complete and utter sycophant you're not going to last long around Donald Trump that's what I think so it's a combination of those things it's that you know you're making a shit sandwich to begin with just by the very nature of the pool that you're drawing from to hire these people um that coupled with Trump's inability to um take criticism or hear anything other than a yes sir or you know we agree with you and how reactionary he is to things you put all that

together of course he's going to have a high turnover rate but cori was talking about obama's turnover rate but i remember reading a thing that said that um that this administration's turnover rate to this point was higher than like obama's clintons and both bushes combined to this point and I totally believe that. I mean, I don't, you know, I've been politically aware for, you know, to some extent for, I don't know, 30, you know, 20 years or so. And I know that I've never seen this type of shit before, and that goes not just for the turnover, but for just all of it combined. And I know that I'm, you know, I'm a goddamn whippersnapper, and I haven't seen all that much in the grand scheme of things. but I've talked to plenty of older people who all say the same thing across the board

that I've never seen anything like this. And I fucking believe them. And I know that I certainly have never seen anything like this. But I just hope, I just, I've been saying this for a while. I just want it to, I just want to finally amount to something. Drew your back, thank God. Buddy, I have imagined the first time I have to intervene on your suicide. and it looks just like this room right here.

This is me just recording my audio suicide dope. We haven't talked about this room. My manifesto. This room has got a bunch of lights in mirrors. It's a dressing room. It's a dressing room. And if you've never been in like a theater's dressing room, it's got bulb lights around the mirrors

so that you can see your face and your makeup. So that's pretty normal. And then it has this golden-colored couch with very gorgeous ornate pillows and a huge rug in the middle of the floor. you're sitting in a dressing room on a gold couch, drinking red wine alone with a fucking gorgeous rug in front of you, just talking into a microphone.

And I walk in and I have to talk you out of whatever's about that. Yeah, I grant you, it's a bad look. It's a bad raid. But with the context, you know, it makes sense. But I was just thinking, I've done early on in our podcast, I did a couple episodes, which was just me by myself. Oh, I remember that. Figuring out how to do this, whatever.

I bet that was a nightmare. Well, and I remember at the time, like, it didn't feel that bad or weird, but I think it was because with those, I knew I was going to have to do it. So I had like, I had something of a plan. Right. You know, but like just now, it was like, oh, you guys both had to go. And I was like, oh, I'll just, I'll talk for a little bit. And it's fine. But after you left, it just, I don't know, it felt so weird.

And I started thinking about, like, you know, like Bill Burr for the most part, it's just him. Well, I mean, a lot of it. That's, like, radio hosting. You know, like a Colin Cowherd or just whatever. Like that's very common for just to be one guy that's just talking into the void. And it feels very weird, at least to me, doing it. But again, it's different when you know that's your job and that's what you're going to do. So you're kind of prep for it.

I wish you had a zebra. A zebra? When I walk in on you and I have to do that, then make sure you have a zebra. Right. Just a zebra. But I was saying. to myself. Let me recount this conversation I just had with me.

Corey was talking about the turnover rate. And first of all, and I don't want to just repeat everything I just said, but first of all, he was comparing it to Obama's turnover rate. But I remember reading a thing about the staff that said, this administration's turnover rate up to this point is higher than Obama's, Clintons, and both Bush's, like, combined. Sure. And so it's way more than just Obama.

And then Corey was like, it's clear these people, know something and so they're i don't know he didn't get the opportunity to finish his thought because he had to leave and go start to show but he and i have talked about that before he doesn't i don't he don't have anything else that's not what i mean but like he he he's just arguing that like it gets to a point where they know too much and he and if he doesn't trust them completely he lets him go i think that's probably an element to it but i think a lot of it is also i think they're drawing from a shitty pool to begin with because i think a lot of people who would take these jobs.

They think he's a kryptonite. They know, exactly. They know better than to even get involved. And so the only ones that are willing to get involved are the ones that are obviously compromised to the extreme, morally and ethically and otherwise. And when that is the case, of course you're going to have problems keeping them around, you know, for whatever reason. Let me make you sad. I think this is a perfect example of how Teflon Don.

is. I mean, doesn't sticks to this man, right? Well, I could easily see, and I have seen it. I'm not like I'm coming up with this. A lot of his defenders saying that's why I elected him. Of course, the establishment,

Mueller, Comey, are coming after him. He's anti-establishment. He's not doing stuff they like. So the deep state, quote unquote, you know what I mean? Yeah, FBI is crooked. CIA is crooked. And that's why I voted for him. Of course he keeps having

to fire people because Washington is an establishment and he's draining the swamp. Man. And dude, at some point we've got to acknowledge his skill. It's one thing but it is

he's so good at it. You know what I mean? Like the level of he's a grifter. He's so good at it. I thought he was bad at it because he comes across so obviously as a grifter. But that's part of it. Do you know what I mean? Like

something we were talking about earlier whose name I won't mention, where they're so full of shit that it's almost enduring, endearing. Right. Trump's not endearing, but my point is like, we all know he's a con man. Well then why does he keep conning everybody? And you say, oh, people voted for him are stupid. He's conning the media.

He's conning us. Like I just said, this is crazy. We're in the middle of a fucking insane controversy. This is a scandal. We're barely talking about it. Of course, part of the reason is Syria, which I did want to get into. And part of the reason I want to get into it is it's the first time I've seen people I know or I follow or I keep up with who love him other than Ann, what's her name that we don't like, who looks like a skeleton?

Calter? She left him a long time ago. But a lot of people have left him over the Syria thing. My buddy James, going all the way back to when I made a lot of people mad by saying people who voted for Trump were racist old people and my friend James, and the old people part made some of our fans mad because apparently they thought,

I was talking about all old people, which is a very old people thing for them to do. I'm not worried about it. They don't listen to podcasts. James is like super upset about the Syria thing because one of his whole deals with Trump was globalism is bad. Like trying to

have open borders and open trade doesn't work. It leads it to many problems, et cetera, et cetera. And our intervention in other countries, specifically in the Middle East, is hurting us. Trump, that was one of the points he actually made consistently throughout his campaign. Like, he really actually did. And it is consistent with his whole anti-immigrant closed the border down thing. It's all racism.

I acknowledge that. But, I mean, it's consistent in terms of the anti-globalism bent. I acknowledge that the timing is fantastically good for Donald Trump, considering the like when the shit happened with Michael Cohen that's his name right Michael I know it's Cohen yeah Michael Cohen when that shit happened I saw so many people on Twitter

and everything else being like and we're gonna bomb Syria in three two right you know because like it's a classic political strategy wag the dog that's what wag the dog even means but and they've been begging him to they being the UN and the international community literally for over a year

but having said all that, like, it wasn't just us. And I know that we all want to do it for over a year. France and the UK and us. And in response to, like, I don't know, man, it's one of those things where I'm so, I don't think it should be our role to be like the world police. But I also feel like using chemical weapons on civilians or whatever, including children, like that ought not be allowed to stand but he's been doing that for six years i know i mean we've

we've got evidence of him using chlorine gas for years now so they have hinted that he stepped it up to sarin gas which is a nerve agent and is different it just sucks it has to be but there's no real proof of that yet now that might be out there but they haven't released it if there is i mean look i'm not i'm not going to say here and tell you that i don't have sympathy for kids it's just that I mean who died when we sent them bombs to Damascus? Because we bombed Damascus, dude,

the city. Right. I mean, who died in that? Yeah, no, I know. I mean, you're right. You're right. It's mostly absolutely, especially for Trump, I'm without a doubt, mostly a purely politically convenient move. But I'm just saying

when it comes to shit like that, like, because I feel the same way about North Korea and have for a while, I feel like North Korea is going to be a thing where, you know, 50 or however many years from now, people are going to look back on it. And by that time, they'll know the full extent of all the atrocities and everything that happened there and be ashamed of us. And now, I don't mean just the U.S., but I mean the Western world at this time of our age. We will feel like we should have, quote, unquote, done something.

For having allowed that to go on for as long as we did. And like, I really believe that shit. Like, even on a global scale, like, when it comes to, like, truly heinous things like that, yeah, it shouldn't be just up to us being the U.S. to just stop everything. But, like, but fucking somebody needs to. Well, first of all, let me say, I think your instinct is morally and logically correct. However, we now have history on our side that shows us, in my opinion, pretty in our own. arguably that we never help, at least in the ways that we end up engaging.

Let me ask you this. And this is a really tough question. We stopped Hitler, though. This is a really, well, let's talk about how we did that. And what I'm about to ask you is a tough question. Is it worth 18-year-old American men dying to stop Assad? We sent bombs and drones and missiles because we say, well, no, not yet, or no. We don't have to do that.

We don't have to do that. We can send our bombs. But our bombs, bombs don't know what a civilian looks like. Mm-hmm. I mean, we bombed a city. Damascus is the capital. It's not New York or Washington, D.C., but it's fucking big. You know what I mean?

It's really big. We just bombed it. People died who had nothing to do with nothing. People died who might have been fucking probably not affected by nerve gas because Damascus has been, you know what I mean? But, like, you understand what I'm saying. Well, fuck that. Maybe some people who were getting gassed in some parts went undercover, pretended they were part of the Assad regime and moved to Damascus.

You never know. But my point is, what are the – it's not a point. It's a question. And it's a tough one. And it's not a fair one. Asking you this is unfair because you're not a politician. You're a comedian. But, like, what are the rules of engagement there?

If we say ex-person is being so vile to his – people, we're going to intervene. Does that mean send troops? Now, look, let me point out real quick as a side note. If we sent troops, Russia would take it as a sign of war and we're in the middle of war three. And by the way, we might be anyway. But what I'm talking about in terms of being the world's police, for over a decade,

we've been the world's police with a remote control. Right. And there's dire consequences to that. I'm not saying I'm pro-sending 18-year-olds to die. In fact, I'm against it. And it's hard. And when I was 20, I wasn't. I didn't feel this way.

Can we help the rebels? If we decide that they're in the right? Yeah, sure. Is there things the UN can do as a coalition to fight Assad? Absolutely. But the idea of bombing a city to keep a man from hurting the people there, it's a little backwards to me. That's the moral thing.

And then again, the side note is we might be in World War III. I don't think so. We can get into Y in a minute after we address the moral thing, but we might be. I mean, I don't think so either because I just feel like at the end of the day they have to – because it's not just Putin. It's all the oligarchs and stuff too, and all they give a fuck about is money. And like at the end of the day – Yeah, Russia's –

Russia can't do it alone and China's not ready. Right. but, well, dude, in China ain't got, man. They're not ready. They don't have the army for it. It ain't, I don't think it's even just that. It's like, you talk about fucking biting a hand that feeds you.

You know, when it comes to, dude, China don't want a fucking war. Right now. China's been surging for years. Because with the hand that feeds them. Right, exactly. But what's the end game to that? Do they always want to be reliant upon our hand? I don't, but that don't, there's ways to,

you can win without ever going to war. You can have fucking economic victory. Only if we pay them. Our debt is in the trillions that we owe them. How do they collect if we don't have the money?

If we don't have it. Yeah, well, that's their fucking problem. Because you know what we bought with those trillions? Fucking tanks and shit. Exactly. Well, yeah. I mean, we played the game. Right.

Well, but so... And that's my argument. China's not ready to go to war with us. And Russia ain't ever going to be by themselves. So let's get back to that moral thing. I asked you that question. I admitted it was unfair. You don't have to answer it, but let's discuss it.

I don't think your instincts are wrong. The facade's like fucking gas and kids, man. That's disgusting. What do we do, though? I'm saying you can have a measured response to it without, yeah, deploying a bunch of 18-year-olds of starting an all-out war. And I'm saying, and then things escalate.

But, like, that's what you got. I'm not sure that's true. Like, I mean, you can have a, quote-unquote, measured response, but there's not one historical example of one that's effective that doesn't hurt a lot of people. And again, I go back to if your whole point is to protect people, what are you doing? Yeah, but if you do nothing, then you know they're going to, it's going to continue. you like he's hurting people in the first place like that's the point of the the action sure but the rebels i mean the rebels were holding their own do shit the rebels were holding their own for a long

time until a year ago if i'm not if i'm not fucking my history up and i probably am i'm kind of drunk but like one of the strongholds they had he went in there and fucked him up and that was the first time we sent a bomb that was the first time we got into this shit and trump was the one who did it and it ended up getting washed away in the headlines because Russia ended up not responding that much. It was a very militarily planned attack. What I mean by that is they hit some bases. You know what I mean?

It was out in the middle of the desert kind of thing. This is a tweet. I don't have time to find it. I follow a guy who teaches history at UT. Professor Astra, I think is his name. He's a socialist or, I don't want to say that. Maybe he is, maybe he's not. He's a Bernie guy, which is how I ended up

finding him. And he tweeted something the other day, I think it was yesterday, maybe the day before. And he said, as a history professor, let me remind all of you, it's really hard to process all the factors, all the context, and all the facts in the aftermath or leading up to the decision. You know what I mean? My whole point is, Mathis had a Mad Dog Mattis. He had a, conference last night and he said they've been using chlorine gas they've been using chlorine gas for six years we've never bombed them even the last time we did bomb it wasn't over chlorine gas they asked him specifically is it sarin gas now and he wouldn't say yes i believe and i'm biased because i hate him that the world has been begging trump to go to war in syria for a while he has gone against it because it's one of the one things he believes in and terms of his platform and it's why Alex Jones was crying. Yeah.

And all that shit. It's why my buddy James ain't with him anymore. It's because you shouldn't intervene. Right. It's not how you prosper as a country. We shouldn't be the world's police. He saw it as an opportunity to be the good guy to be the hero and to get the press talking about something positive or whatever.

My other opinion is, and this is where I become not a traditional, quote-unquote, American liberal. is that the reason France and the UK and big factions in America want to police the Middle East has nothing to do with giving a shit about the people there. Right. It's because it's such a valuable region in terms of location and oil. And I agree with you about that. Because if that wasn't the case, they would be doing something about North Korea, you know, but there's like... Exactly.

Right. And six years of chlorine gas, they'd already fought Assad. And so I'm not... I'm with you that, like, I want the guy to... go away but it's like but I know why we're doing it now. Right and the reasons for us doing it are not defensible

which no I agree with you on that. That's what I'm saying it's just a shitty situation because it yeah I just feel like I don't know it's just one of those like let me take it a step forward. Pretty unfounded bleeding heart sentiments of just like something should be done

but like it's you know not that easy. Well let me let me hit you with this one. Let me go a step further. I'm curious your response to this. I almost shared this and then I didn't, and I think I was on the way to something and I was like, let me think about how I feel about this. My buddy James Baker, very smart guy. He's a DCA guy.

And he said, as a joke, hey, I heard I don't know what country, let's say China, was going to bomb us because we're poisoning kids in Flint, Michigan. Obviously, that analogy is not airtight. But it did make

me shudder. It did like make me like sort of take that step back and look at things from the terms of where's the money, where's the power and go, oh yeah, these people don't give a fuck about me. The kids over, they don't give a fuck about nothing. This is always about money. You know what I mean? Yeah, I mean, I don't, obviously Flint is a fucking also, you know, shameful, but I don't think that they're really comparable directly in that way. But I hear what you're... But the ultimate conclusion of that

they don't give a fuck about the kids in Flint or the kids in Syria or whatever. I mean, yeah, that's without a doubt. That's true. And that, honestly, is the cynical reason that in the last,

I'd say, two and a half years or so, I've started to realize that I am not a Democrat. I'm really more of a socialist. And not like big, yes, socialist, let's all centralize the power and kill the people who disagree with us, but just they don't give a shit, man.

No, they don't. I don't think that's ever going to change, though, regrettably, because I don't think that you maybe one or there might, there's some exceptions every now and then, but by and large, you can't get to like that upper echelon of, of that system. It's any system.

And still give a fuck. If you give a fuck, you're not going to make it that far. Dude, this is my cynical side coming out where I'm almost a nileist it's any system if we were a socialist country that might be cool for a generation or two at most and then the coke brothers of the world people like that i mean would just figure out a way to exploit that system right so it's just a matter of which system is you know the least exploitable and capitalism in terms of democracy style did an okay job for a while ah maybe not more i learn about it the more it freaks me out but anyway we're in the weeds we are and you know we're in

on a real high note, a real cheery, cheery conclusion here, but I mean, we do need to, though, because you're going to have to go on stage pretty soon,

so. Well, the last thing I'll say, I just hope we don't all die. Well, as long as we all die at the same time, it'll be, I feel like,

I've said it before. I said it when Trump first got a Lego. That's the bright side. There's something almost community feeling about that. How we all just going to know, we're going to die together,

you know what I mean? That's kind of beautiful. Yeah. Let's not. let him get away. Like, let's not do the thing that some liberals did with Bush. And frankly, with Obama and Gantanamo Bay

and some of the stuff we let him get away with. Let's not let our fear of the enemy, even if it's Putin or whoever it ends up being, let us forget that he's a shitty fucking leader. And let's make sure as liberals that we do a good job of being like, we need a new leader. Even if he's, you know what I mean?

Because, dude, that's like, that's a true nightmare. I really don't look. His, like, his base base, they're never going to think that he's a shitty leader almost regardless. And I feel like those of us that are opposed to him, like, none of this shit is going to even put a dent in that. But there are people, Trey. This may come as a shock to you, but I would argue there are people at there who still haven't completely made their mind up about Donald Trump. And that's why this war scares me.

That's like the fifth reason, but it's on the list. I refuse to believe that it's a difference-making amount of people. I hope you're right. Dude, if we had just come out to vote in the numbers that we had in elections prior, he wouldn't have got in the first place. Right. And like, it was just, it was the perfect storm of shit that even allowed him to get where he is. And then plenty of the, like, genuinely good Republicans that voted for him.

I got to go. I know what's what I'm saying. It ain't going to happen again. That's all I'm saying. It ain't going to happen again, y'all. We're going to live. We're going to live. It's going to be okay. We're going to move past this. I love y'all. See you later. Bye.

Thank you all for listening to The Well Red Show. We'd love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next week if you got nothing to do. Thank you, God. Bless you, good night, and skew.