wellRED podcast - #68 - Hangovers, Sweet Chili, and Katie Crowder!

Episode Date: May 23, 2018

The boys talk hotdogs, sweet music venues, and old southern comedy legends in the green room of the funny bone, and then Trae sits down with his better half for a spell. wellREDcomedy.com for tickets to our showssmokeyboysgrilling.com for some rubs for ya meat!

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion. Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie, I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say. Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know?

Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low mane? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better, and it's called Rocket Money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app

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lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friends' faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball-looking twin fellas. Yeah. So that was money.

What was that a reply gift for? Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first. But then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten. If it wasn't for Rocket Money, I never would have even figured it out. So shout out to them.

They help. If you're money dumb like me, Rocket Money can help. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney. dot com slash well read today that's rocket money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast. What's up everybody? It's your boy, the show. Can you all remember the last time I did the opening for a podcast and didn't complain about being sick? Me either. I'm still sick. God damn it.

This pollen needs to go away. I was complaining on this particular podcast that we were doing that I thought I was just still hung over from my bachelor party that I had this weekend in Nashville, which appreciate that, Nashville. You all are awesome. But apparently, at some point during my hangover, I actually got sick.

And so it feels like I've had a hangover for six goddamn days. Don't hit. Anyways, tour updates. This weekend, May 25th and 26th, we're going to be in Huntsville, Alabama, at Stand Up Live. Then we're on May 27th to Oxford, Mississippi. After that, we have a pretty long break because your boy, the show, is getting married. Then June 16th, Chicago, Illinois, June 23rd, Tulsa, Oklahoma, on the Oklahoma City, Oklahoma,

Honolulu, Hawaii, Burlington, Vermont, Portland, Maine, District of Comedy Festival in D.C., yada, yada, yada, well-read comedy.com, W-E-L-L-R-E-D, Comedy.com. That's where you can grab all those tickets. Sign up for our newsletter, so you know where we're going to be before anybody else. You can grab some merch.

And our book, The Liberal Redneck Manifesto, Dragon Dixie out of the dark. As always, this podcast is brought to you by Smokey Boysgrilling.com. Go to Smokey Boysgrilling.com to grab some meat rubs, fo yo meat. They have hog rub and they have beef rub. And like I've said on this podcast,

before and aside from just putting it on your meat before you cook it, which you totally should, I have been also using the hog rub in my bone broth when I drink it and have my little sippy sip on the couch. So it's good for a lot of things. I put it on top of kish. I put it on top. What did I do last week? Oh shit, I made Mexican street corn with it.

It was dope. Anyways, Smokey Boysgrilling.com. Send them some love, tell them we sent you. And enjoy this podcast. Part of it from the Green Room. Oh my God, where the fuck were we at? Oh, shit. We did part of it in the green room.

It's somewhere in Ohio. And then there's a portion with just Trey and Katie. Hope y'all enjoy. Love you, skew-bye. Well, well, well. They got this place here in Dayton called Zombie Dogs. Is it like Zombie burgers? It's like Zombie burgers?

I mean, I don't think there's any affiliation, but it is similar in that it's wild-ass hot dogs in the way that zombie burger is wild ass burgers are we rolling yeah good so on the record again fuck those people who made us eat tacos instead of zombie burgers about it down today i still ate some zombie burger on that trip for for what it's worth uh but zombie dogs we're in dating ohio and you know as soon as i seen that it was game over so i had a hot dog with uh beef beer cheese and what's those onion like crispy onions?

Krispy onions? Yeah. Do I even have to ask? It was a beef dog or it had beef on top of the hot dog? It was both. It was both. And a hot dog. I didn't finish any of these three things I'm describing,

but I just couldn't decide. I ate about half of all of them. And a hot dog with, I have no recollection. Chili? Chili, maybe. Chili? Chili, monster cheese, brown,

mustard and something else. Monster cheese? Yeah. That's my shit. Are you saying monster or mustard? Monster. Well, it was both. But his mustard cheese the thing? No. I don't think that's something Corey Chappelle. I bet they have. They got like horseradish cheeses and mango cheese. Chos Mustard cheese. They probably got mustard cheese.

It'll make you fart. Ask him. Just ask it. And loaded tater tots. On a hot dog? No. An order of loaded tater tots. with chili macaroni and cheese, sourcrow, pickles, beer cheese, and God knows what else on it. So again, my mustache, did it hit? It's just so insanely hard.

Guarante. I was kind of worried because I was like, because I got it on Uber Eats, and I was like, oh, you had this delivered? Yeah. Oh, man, this just got sadder. I thought you were just saying, well, while I'm here, I'll try three different types of hot dogs. No, you had three hot dogs delivered to your hotel. Two hot dolls and a loaded tauts. And a loaded cots.

Yeah. Get it straight. I'm fine with it. But I feel like, you know. I was, I didn't want to go anywhere. Loaded tod sounds like a charity for getting kids drunk. Uh-huh. I got to the, I got to the hotel like 3.30.

It was in the window. Man needed to run. Hadn't eat nothing all day. I got on Uber Eats because I just didn't want to, I didn't want to go nowhere. I wanted to run while naked. You know. Yeah. I mean, yeah, I'm not helping me.

my case any for it not being sad, I realized. But that's what I wanted to do. So I got on Uber Eats, and it was all, it was all, you know, McDonald's, you know, like a burrito bowl type, very standard fare and then fucking zombie dogs, which also had the highest rating. So, you know. But I was like, that's going to be soggy as hell by the time it gets here. But it wasn't.

I don't know what kind of roles they were on, but dude, I don't know. It was head to tell legit. So I don't know how. gives my stamp of approval. Well, not the whole city. I mean, not that it don't, but zombie dogs. I mean, what else do you need? Right.

So anyway. Was that chili that was on it? Was it the Cincinnati-type chili? No, or at least if it was, I couldn't tell because it was drowned out by all the other hits. Because Cincinnati-style chili don't hit for me. Right. And I thought, right before I bought into it, I was bit into it, I was like, oh, man, I bet this is that damn Cincinnati style because I hadn't even thought of that. Doesn't that just mean our own pasta?

No. It's got like cinnamon in it or something down. Hold on. You guys are saying kind of two different things. Is it sweeter or is it cinnamon? It's sweeter, but I thought that they put cinnamon in it. Might be both. But I could be wrong about that.

It's both, yeah. I like a sweet chili, but when I say that, I think I just mean compared to regular chili, I don't want cinnamon in it. I mean, no, it's not that I won't fucking eat some skyline chili or something like that, but it's not my purpose. I'll put like half a cup of ketchup in mine because there's so much sugar in the ketchup. It'll sweeten it just a little. Yeah, no, I'm with you.

I saw Darren Carter, the part of it. party starter do that at a waffle house at 2 a.m. one night. No, no, I don't mean egg ketchup. I'm talking to me when I'm making it. Yeah, he got a waffle house bowl of chili and who? Darren Carter. The party starter, Corey. You don't know Darren Carter, the party starter?

How is this possible? I don't know Darren Carter. Oh, my God. A Southern Circuit staple? I thought he was for sure. Maybe I'm not. Maybe I don't hit it. He was one of the few white dudes on BT Comic View.

He did a snoop dog in prep bow wow. He looks like my buddy Jared from Nashville. I know. Like a tall ginger dude. His wife was black and his closer. I recognize. No, you're fine. Go on in.

I recognize the name now. His wife is black and his closer was about how you're, you know you're putting it down good when she grabbed you by the back of the head and calls you the N-word. And buddy, when he did that on Comic View, them black folk at that show lost their goddamn mind. I guarantee. I mean, he probably made a lot of money for the next decade with a lot of black fans. I mean, he all, every time, every time he came through side, I'm pretty sure I opened for him at least twice, maybe three times at side sputters. And every time, like, he always had, I never got to.

He always had good crowds and stuff. He was also a nice dude. He asked me, but he asked me once, like, this was probably at the height of my, like. Hatred. Yeah, but you remember what I got. Nobody. I remember all of this. Yeah, dude, I know him.

This was definitely two months from the end. Oh, yeah. probably but i mean physically i was like probably as burly as i ever was oh okay maybe during that time but this was also towards the end because i just remember like we were fed up with sides putters without a doubt but that's not what i was getting at i was just this was probably like again the burliest i've ever been knowing wrong i was plenty fat too but i was just big give me a war and uh god damn he asked me he asked me why like it seemed like all southern dudes were just like

just big and strong and he was like do you like work on a farm or something when you say and I was like yeah man we all do throw bells of hay around all day did you really tell him that yeah

yeah but I mean in a way that I feel like was clear that I was fucking with him one of my favorite stories of what Andy has done being a red ass over the years Annie nannied for one of my law school professors and her husband was a professor at Harvard. Now, my understanding, looking back on it,

was the wife would get published more, but he worked at Harvard, so he was like, you know, a little bit, you know, better than her in terms of the academics. And that was like a big thing, Andy observed. He was insecure, but there was no reason to be because he worked at Harvard. I say that to say Andy didn't like him for that reason.

Right. So one day, he's talking to her about where, she's from and she's telling him how red asscott county is and he just can't wrap his head around it and he goes so like i don't i mean does i'm trying to think if he started it this way if she i know what the punchline is let me say this exactly right though he says i know that your people are very musical that's what it was he open with i know your people are very musical and then he goes yeah we all have to play an instrument by six they taught me how to play the jug

She straight-faced him. And she said, like, a few seconds past, and she was like, I just knew if I talked first. It's like that old adage. If you talk first, you lose. So she just stared at him. And then finally he goes, that's very interesting. Do you still play the jug? And she said, not since the accident.

And he goes, are you being serious? And she goes, no, you idiot. And his wife, according to Andy, first. fell into the floor laughing at him, and they got in a fight. She was like, he got mad and left the room and wouldn't talk to him. Anyway. That's amazing. That is funny.

I'm still pretty blown away right now that you, so Darren Carter don't play the catch? I guess he didn't, man. He definitely didn't in my... Yeah, I could see how Michael's against party starters. Right. But I'm saying he damn sure didn't in my time there, because obviously I would have worked with him. As far as, from my perspective, he was just on that roster of comics that just... The Southern Circuit that just constantly rotated through.

Right. He was part of that. I mean, if he did, it was, he worked there before my time, like, there. And then, I don't know, because, yeah, no, I'd have worked with him. And you know we would have hit for each other. Bridget always did that where if you work with somebody and it went okay, she'd put you with them again. But, like, that kind of sucks. Did you ever work with Leanne?

Yeah, again, two or three times. That's what I thought. And then I worked with that one time. But then there was other, anyway, it doesn't matter. Other people you wanted to work with, but you didn't get to. to because of that. Trade it and tell this part of the story, and I know Darren was nice, but I remember it being so fucking funny to me at the time.

You called me like the next day or I saw you at a mic that week, and you were like, he made me take him to Waffle House. He did. And the way you said it, you just looked at me like, he made me take him. No, you were doing it for the story. I had shot him down, but Thursday and Friday night, I just wouldn't do it. it. Because you lived in

no crib and had a family and a job and shit. Yeah. And it's like by the time the late, it's one in the

morning. And then it's like 45 for you to get home or 30. Yeah. And I just didn't, you know, I just begged off basically.

And on Saturday night I found it was like, all right man, let's go. And then while we were there, he put a half a bottle of ketchup into a, you know,

a cup, like a six ounce cup. You know, you get a cup of soup as opposed to a bowl, that size thing of chili, half a bottle of ketchup

into it. and I know you're just like, yeah, it's, but like, I was, I saw that, and I was like, I too am fine with that. A half a bottle is just made. I was super weirded out by it. A half a bottle is too much. I'm generally fine with it because ketchup is tomato base. It's a tomato based dish.

It's got a lot of sugar and a lot of salt in it, so you're just adding something. But like, if you just put half a bottle into one bowl, you're just eating ketchup. That's what it was. And I'm against that. Hits. Speaking of chili with ketchup in it, that's exactly what, like, I'm so glad that fans right there. Drew's far went straight from his asshole to my face.

Dude, your fucking butthole is just... It's been a weekend, man. Scores sure, there has been a weekend. My butt also... Tell me about it because I wasn't there. We definitely will. I want to add one thing, though, since we're sharing war stories, two things. So we did have to drive around the axe a lot.

I picked Tony Deo up in that hoopty I used to own, my brother's drug car. Do you remember that? Yeah. And to Tony's credit, unlike Deering Carter the Part of the... party starter. He has traveled enough to know that not everyone who's barely works on a farm, I guess. He wasn't like, but he

was suspect. You know what I mean? Like this dude pulls up who's the opener and is like, hey man, get in. That car was a 19, like 93 cutlass. The carpet or whatever, the cloth, I don't even know, the cloth, I'm not sure what you call it on the ceiling. It's

falling down. Yeah. I've seen that My mama had probably four different cars. My granny's Dodge Diplomat. It was like that until that motherfucker was just gone. And Tony is awesome. He's always been nice to me. He sent me a bunch of stuff that...

One of the weekends with Leanne, Tony was the feature. This is the weekend we're talking about. Actually, he was supposed to be a headliner that weekend, and he found out he was the feature when he got there. Did that happen to him more than once? Or maybe, you know what? I was saying, because I was in seeing the weekend I'm talking about. He told me that story.

Okay. And it was the last time he was there, and he thought about never coming back. again but he needed the money another sad thing about being a rogue comic but after meeting liana talking to her for a few minutes she walked off and he looked at me and he goes is she fucking with me buddy first time i met her i thought it wasn't real because leanne she's so sweet because she's just like so over the top like southern sweet to you she fucking wouldn't they're and you know she's like oh honey you're my angel whatever and like she walked off he looked at me he goes is she fucking with me i still don't fully buy it i just started cracking up i don't mean she

a horrible person. I don't think, I think she absolutely gives money to charities and worries about all the kids she worries about. I think all that's real. I think she's really a Christian. I just also think that like, I don't know, for, like her husband, like she calls him dumb or something to his face. You know what I mean? You got to have a release. Yeah, man, that's a thing, you know, like, I mean, obviously that type of like saccharine seemingly and oftentimes truly fake sweetness from like, you know, southern bails. Right. Well, anyway, the Tony, the only thing was, so he was being nice, we were riding around, he was asking me about myself because he's a generally good dude. And when I said, yeah, I'm a lawyer by day, I'm a public defender, he, like, I guess kind of like the Leanne thing.

He looked at me and he goes, what? You're a what? And I was like, I'm a lawyer. And he goes, is this a client's car? Yeah. And then my other story is I took Josh Gondeman to, uh, to, uh, uh, Twisted mics were because it was the only bar of that side of town I knew and he didn't want to go downtown because it was too far away Yeah

Twisted mics was a bar we used to have open mics at and it was close to the comedy club and Josh wanted to go for a drink So me and Andy took Josh there and it was Swingers night Me Andy and Josh are sitting at a table. We're looking around all these people And then we like realized that woman just made out and she's like 40 and she's kissed like five dudes in here People start approaching us and then the owner who would come to comedy night was there with his girlfriend and you could tell he was soon super uncomfortable. He was like, do you guys know what's going on and you're in?

Is this your friend that you brought to Swingers Night? Or is this about to be weird? And it was super weird. Speaking of picking up. Especially because Gondelman, dude. Like, Yeah. If you'd have brought me somewhere out of town,

that could end up turning into something, maybe. But, like, Gondam was such a sweetheart and like, oh, my God, y'all, I really don't have a voice. Speaking of picking up, picking up the other comics as the MC, because it was like part of our duties. I drove that 05. Ford F-150 at that time

The Brad Williams Weekend Hit Like having him get up in it Yeah And obviously dude he was the first You know he like opens the door And he's like oh fucking great

You know or whatever like He literally climb into your truck Brad's awesome No I had love him I didn't get to work with him either Until recently DC Yeah

Oh yeah at the improv God I love that club Well What was we moving on to Oh you Can we please fucking shoot me? It's so hot in here, right? It's hot, I don't hit.

You're tired, you're sick, you're hung over. It's been your bachelor party weekend. I know. And it was special. And me and you had a brunch show on Sunday. And that was awesome. And he got... It was today?

I'm sorry, on Saturday. I don't know what day it is, Trey. Don't judge me. We don't hit. But what... That show hit, it was awesome. I love doing that brunch show. Oh, that show.

But what happened was is that in order to feel okay to do that show, I had to get up and start drinking again. Me too. And you know me, that's just what that was all the rest of the night. And I couldn't keep up with you so. What time was that? Two. Two.

So you say, I've been wondering this. Was that like a party for Zanis, like, comics and staff? Or was that open to the public? No, they do a brunch show. Oh, a brunch show. Yeah, they do it. It was great packed. And then Dave Sativa, who was one of the hosts, DeKrust.

Bradst, I'm sorry. Oh, David was the other comic, the IPA guy. Yeah. I don't want to tell her jokes on the pod. But anyway, Brad was telling me that he was like, oh, man, I'm sorry. It was only three quarter of the way full last weekend. You know, he's like, I know every host says that, but it's true. So it's doing really well.

Yeah, and it's 2 o'clock show. It was so much fun. Because people get drunk. Do you know what I mean? Well, dude, if they're there, they went to see comedy. They were getting kind of full and tired by the time Corey and I got up, but, you know, your boys. we was smotion so as i always say with special events like that like if it's a late friday night or something like that sometimes people just go because well it's friday night and we have

it's date night so we don't want to go to the movies again but like if you leave your house to go to a comedy club at two o'clock in the afternoon you want to see some goddamn stand-up right you know what i'm saying they were for sure yeah well before that that's cool as shit i y'all had talked about it and i thought at first i thought it was just like lucy was just having like a brunch thing like some I surely didn't know what the fuck was happening either. And then when you start talking about doing time, I was like, are they just doing time for each other? What the fuck is going on?

But, I mean, that's cool. Holly was there. Holly was there. Holly Lena, and she smooched, and we run around with her and her dad's Mercedes and took her to a bar and a trailer. Holly's black, everyone's listening. Holly and her friend, Candace. Oh, it's escaping me. I'm being bad right now.

They went with us, and Holly just kept talking about, this is what you did, you dumbass rednecks, took your two black friends and a Mercedes. Mercedes to the fucking bar that's literally a trailer and it's got goddamn Santa's all over the side of we just having fun. I had a blast. It was a great day. I mean, you know, it was kind of like a little, uh, comics retreat.

You know what I mean? Sure. We don't, we only, we hang it with ourselves and, you know, you're to my best friends. I love you. We also watched Lonnie Love show that night. Right. We got, yes. And by.

It was flying. As you can imagine. I worked with her inside sputters too. Right. It wasn't just her. B. Cove. Brian Covington. opened

Mike James and he did good Mike James are you know yeah yeah he's probably gonna do a set in Huntsville which we'll get into

in a minute we need to talk about that but uh he did and then they had this dude who dropped in he was in town from L.A but he was from there

named Seibo Sebo Sebo was about a 50 year old Cho Cho Cho and buddy he was

if Andrew Dice Clay was Andre Dice Clay oh my God but I mean he was all Andre Dice Clay it was all dick jokes it was all shitting on couples in the audience what's up what's up buddy hey go ahead you're fine yeah

uh is everybody seated yeah okay let me yeah man sure cool then yeah i can do it let me uh p real quick are we pausing this yeah we're gonna pause in just a second i guess i'll finish the andre dice clay and then i'll hit pause i just just to tell you tray it was so much fun to watch a seasoned i'd never heard of him sebo you know black choe comic do a black room just crushing there was one white dude up front and with a black woman he was shitting all over him and I will say there was a table full of four dudes

and he made some real homophobic comments but I was like kind of pleased with how the room got tight on him. Like he even commented like goddamn times have changed and then he just moved on and shitting on the white guy who dates a black girl and that's timeless and everyone loved it. Right. It was fun.

That sounds fun. I mean we're about to pause so I still want to hear more about the bachelor party but also like get into that and talk to you about I think there's a broader topic there because we were at the rhyming, watching Trample by Turtles. A band that I have seen twice now, and I think they're the best live band I've ever seen.

I'd like to talk to you. You were at a music festival. Bonneros coming up. I'd like to talk to you about music venues and, like, atmosphere to both of you. It reminds me of another topic I thought of that I think is interesting to talk about this week. But anyway, all that and more when we come back. It's fun.

And we're back. here's the thing. So this is what happened. I don't know if we've made it clear or not, but we had to take a break because we're in Dayton, Ohio, and we had to do a show. Well, we did the show. That show's over.

We have another show, second show, but we're back with y'all in the in-between, know what I mean? And I don't remember, though, Drew, at all. I kind of sort of remember. I was saying I was about to talk to you about the concert, Corey and I went to and Rock on the Range, and I wanted to talk about music venues.

and atmosphere at a music place because we was at the rhyming, obviously a historical place. I had a good time. No complaints. Had a great time. But I just like to get into a conversation about, you know, where you see shows at in the context of shows. I got to turn this light on real quick. So, yeah, it got pretty dark in here. When we first got here, the sun was beaming through the fucking window. So it was very bright and hot. And we left for a while to do to meet and greet whatever else. I come back in here. Corey's in here alone.

and all that had happened was the sun had set. But when I first walked in, I thought Corey had just turned every light off. He was sitting here in the dark. Like he had just put himself in the dark in here because Corey just does not hit right now. I do not hit. Well, all right.

Friday was Corey's Bachelor Party. Trade didn't come because he's not a good friend of Corey. That's what they call getting ahead of it. You, motherfucker. And we went to see Trample by Turtles one of my favorite bands at the Rhyman. And I got to say, I've seen them twice now. I think they're the best live band I've ever seen.

It was amazing. It was my first time seeing them. But I've seen them at Terminal 5 in New York City, which is known to be sound-wise, a great venue of that size, which it holds about 1,000 or 2,000 people. You ever seen My Morning Jacket? I have. Okay.

Outdoor. Did Travel by Turtles just destroy them? I mean, they're my favorite live band. I wouldn't say they destroy them, but, and I, and I recognize this it's different because Trimple by Turtles all five of them stand on the edge of the stage

and they play stringed instruments. Stand-up-based cello, violin, banjo, guitar. I get them all? And then there's, of course, a drummer. Yeah. They all sing. So it's like old-timey meets new-timy.

All that hits for me. Right. And this has nothing to do with them being niche. This is just a fact. They're all so good at those instruments. Like the cello player is,

So good. You know, the fiddle player, violin player, or whatever, can play really slow, almost classical style, and he does, and then he can warp that fiddle, son. On that note, Aivet Brothers hit like a motherfucker live, too. Well, that was one of the things I was going to talk about in talking about venue. The first time I saw the Abert Brothers, Andy took me to a tent at Bioneroo. It was that tent. And it's a good-sized tent. It was during the day, but it wasn't too hot under the tent.

And it was beautiful out. they were great. They had a lot of energy. And I was convinced that they were the greatest band of all time in that moment, you know. Yeah. My morning jacket, the only time, I've seen them on the main stage at Monaroon, not as the main act. It was right. Right before Arcade Fire.

I think that's right. Was hot as fuck. God damn. I was hot. I was out of chemicals. I was literally high on just their performance. Like it worked out that night. Like at that time when they played, I was sober as a judge.

And also probably hung over, too, because it was like Friday. night at Bonaroo, whatever, but like, dude, you were at that same show and you didn't like it. That's one of my favorite show I've ever been to. Dude, I loved that shit. I liked it a lot, but, well, just to put it in context, I liked Arcade Fire better.

Dude, my boy Jared passed out after that shit. Word. From the heat. Well, he was, he was, me and him were so fucking into that show. Right. And we stayed for Arcade Fire, but right when Arcade Fire started, Jared fell out.

So we had to, we literally drug him out of there. I'm about to follow out. So I missed Arcade Fire. You know what, though? I don't think that's when I saw. I don't, I've seen Arcade Fire at Monteroo. Well, that was the only year they were at Bonaroo? It was Friday night.

It was. Were they the headline? My morning jacket into Arcade Fire. And then after Arcade Fire on the side stages was like, I think Lil Wayne played that night too. But was Arcade Fire the headliner of the night? Mm-hmm. Okay, yeah, I was there. Yeah.

Do we go to a Bonaroo without knowing it? Have we talked about this before? That, yes, we may have met already at that point, but we were not, I did not know you were there. We were not hanging out at that Bonaroo at all. Well, I don't know if that's the My Morning Jacket one that I saw, but whatever one I saw was hot. I was out of chemicals. I don't like Bonarroo's main stage that much overall. Like, my favorite shows at Bonarue have never been there.

Dog. Wilco one year was good. I was at that show, too. That's where they had the hot air balloons going over and it was twilight. That was flame. That show was fucking great. And Pearl Jam was great. So I saw, here's some kick-ass shows I've seen at the main stage at Bonn'Rue.

Beastie Boys, last live show they ever did together. Unreal good. Didn't see it? The My Morning Jacket show, Jay-Z. Didn't see it? Fucking bawling. Didn't you say that kind of got you more into Jay-Z? Yeah.

I mean, I had respect for Jay-Z. I didn't have no problem with Jay-Z, but I wasn't a Jay-Z guy. But that show at Bonn-Rue, I still tell people to this day, I'm like, that's the best concert I've ever been to in my life. But I think a big part of that is because my expectations weren't really that high. Because again, I mean, Jay-Z, he's a superstar, but, like, rap

shows are very hit or miss, you know? Mr. Butt, he knows what I'm talking about. But also context, and that's sort of what I'm getting at. And for me, I'm not shitting on the main stage. It's just if I thought about and wrote down the 10 best shows I've ever seen there, I would assume seven of them were going to be in one of them tents.

Those tents are just badass. They are. The tents are awesome. Dude, Killer Mike, the tent that's great that was unreal were you with me at uh i think that was the year you were in me might have been andy we were at we saw um die arntward did you see die ontort at bonarroo no i wish that is i saw go go bordella on one of them tents that one that was fucking unreal glam us i guarantee it was awesome so at so cori and i were at tramper by turtles at the riman and the riman's a great venue the sound is great for sure we saw all garf brooks there rime is church baby well it literally has church pews and and

And this is a story that's very raven and we'll entertain y'all. But I also think it's like, yeah, that's the kind of venue it is. And if you got a bluegrass jam band who, like, plays really fast, you're going to have this type of thing happen. I'm saying, I'm dancing or whatever. This dude who's to my left, it's not any of our buddies, like, teach us to my right. And then Corey and him are behind me. We're the only two in the row that we know.

And then Luke is in front of us in a different row, but kind of standing with us. He leans over and he goes, hey, when my wife gets back, she had just left, y'all are going to have to slide over. And I was like, oh, yeah, okay, buddy. And I turn around and I look where I'm standing. I'm right in front of my seat. And I was like, well, I'm in front of my seat. And my head, I'm thinking, like, are y'all separated by a rail?

Because those church pews only, are there only four seats and then it's another church pew? So I'm looking like, you know, what are you saying to me? Like, what do you want me to do? Do you want one of us to stand in the aisle so you can sit by your wife? Is that where you're getting at? Like, I'm just like, oh, I mean, I'm in front of my number. And he goes, don't be a fucking dick. about it, dude.

And I go, I'm not, that, that's my seat, dude. And he goes, are you sure? Just knowing you, just said this to you? Yeah. I thought you meant it was Luke at first. No. He said, are you sure? Oh, it ran all over me.

Like, well, you want me to get my fucking ticket out or whatever? And I go, yeah, I'm fucking sure. It's my fucking seat. Fuck you, man. And he goes, you're unbelievable. my wife is pregnant and then I said he said my wife is pregnant

and she needs more room and I said well then buy her ass a bigger house and take her there and then I just ignored him while he like seeded at me and then I would dance all over him but dear listeners at the end of the song his wife had come back

she was like oh my god she had no idea she said oh my god this is my favorite song and then you can tell she was like why is he not reacting like he's happy and then I was just like I'll buy you a beer And he's like, you know, do that And I was like, I'm gonna go buy you a beer, I'm sorry.

And I went and bought him a beer, but I didn't talk to him the rest of the night. Still, that's Like, for you? Like, I'm stunned by that. Oh, fuck you. What? I'm blown away.

Right? I bought him a beer? Yeah, that, no, don't get me wrong, that guy was being a dick. Like, you were in the right, that guy was being an asshole. But I took it from zero to ten.

Like I do. Nah, no, no. No, no, I took him six to ten. I've told up on the podcast, I know I don't think I've told, but like, dude, at football games, so I did that repeatedly. Like, I went, at a Titans game once on Christmas Day, this dude who I got in to know a little bit because he was in the seat beside me, just some dude I didn't know, you know, but we got, we'd hit it off somewhere talking, I'm hammered drunk.

And at one point he looks at me, he goes, hey man, this old guy behind you wants you to sit down. And I was like, what? And I turned around and looked and there's this like 75 year old man sitting behind me. But we're on the second row, 50 yard line by the way. So it's like, I mean, we're fucking in it. Yeah. But there's just like 75 year old dude sitting there and he looks at me and he goes, could you sit down? And he wasn't super shitty, but he also was.

Okay, so I apologize. Everybody listening. I realize this is probably a shit show. What happened was the batteries for the recorder died. right in the middle of a story that I was telling. I don't know if Corey's even going to include any of that story or not. So I don't know. But I feel like I should, I kind of also want to get your perspective on it.

So I'm going to retell the story very briefly. But anyway, the batteries died. Corey was super hung over from his bachelor party. So he had forgotten or mistakenly just did not pack the AC, the wall plug for the recorder for the podcast. So when the batteries died, we were just. shit out of luck because we were in the green room at a club and we all had to hit the road right after and everything so anyway here you and i are again together hi i'm here do you remember that titans game we went to on christmas day yeah what you remember about it um it was cold

there was nobody there like we were the only ones and we had we had real good tickets. Second row, 50 yard line. And you yelled at that old man. That's the story I was telling was me yelling at the old man. But I don't know if Corey included that part or not because obviously I'm

recording this before Corey puts everything together. So I'm not sure how he's going to edit it all. But anyway, so if Corey didn't include any of that from right before the batteries died, basically, yeah, we went to a Titans game on Christmas Day. I was drinking and everything and I get pretty into football games we ended up losing that one of course

we did but like I was we're on the second row 50 yard line like we're down there in it and I was on the end of our row of seats it was me and you Dustin Knight was there and my dad and his dad and page and page so but I was on the end and you were beside me and I think my dad was beside you right on the left side of me was this other dude about my age and his girlfriend or wife or whatever and me and him hit it off we've been talking me and him were totally cool everything's fine and it's at one point he leans over me and he goes hey buddy i think this old guy behind us wants you to sit down so immediately i was like what i turned around and look and there's this geriatric little old man sitting there on christmas day and i turned and i said what and he looked at me and he goes

could you sit down? And I said... You yelled out. You yelled out. This is a football game, not a goddamn Disney movie. Yeah. Yeah. And I about died.

That's exactly right. You nailed it. Yeah. Yeah, of course I remembered it. Because I gave you an awful look and was just like... But also, I will say this. There were so many... Like, I'm pretty sure that even the...

There wasn't any... in front of us either. Like, all of the seats were fucking empty. He could have shifted down behind me if he didn't want someone standing up in front of him. Exactly. Because I was freezing my ass off, bundled up in blanket. There's that and also, like, a football. It's a football game, not a goddamn Disney game.

But also, it's the, we were on the second row of the 50-yard line. Like, people are going to, collectively. you know what's better than the second row? Not the third row. The first row. Not if I'm in front of you. Yeah. The Tennessee game. Okay.

You're skipping around. We've told that story before. Corey and Drew talked about it. It doesn't matter. It's not even a story. This dude, collectively, all the fans of a certain team, they want to scream and be loud and be enthusiastic for home field advantage, right? Mm-hmm.

Well, so how can you get mad at somebody for standing up and yelling at a football? I wasn't like, it had nothing to do with, I wasn't offending him or nothing. I was just standing up and was in his way. But it's a football game. Yeah, I don't know. Like, anyway. I mean, like I said, I was a little bit upset that you had yelled at this old man, but I was also like, this old man could just scoot one seat over and be behind me.

I'm not standing up. Yeah, I don't really feel, like if I, obviously, if I was sober or even just now, If it was now, and I was in the exact same situation, I would not scream and cuss at that old man. But I don't to this day really feel that bad about it for all the reasons I already said. Anyway, so yeah, that's the end of the story that I was telling when the batteries died in the recorder. Have I told you we're revamping the podcast? Did I tell you about that? You just said we're revamping the podcast.

We're going to have people send in stories of red assery, basically. Oh, that's fun. The idea is, or part of the idea behind it is that, like, because I mean, I'm assuming if anybody's listening to this, they're probably of the liberal persuasion, or at least the vast majority of people listening to it are. Yeah. And so these will be mostly stories of red assery

provided by liberals and the idea is to, you know, give other examples of, you know, proving that we're not unicorns or whatever. Just showing another side of both liberalism but also the South or wherever these people. Somebody, you know, people could send in red-ass stories from Pennsylvania or whatever, you know. So that's the basic idea behind it. Corey's setting up a, we're going to have it right.

Maybe you use the same email. I don't know. Corey's not here right now. It's just me and you. And he's going to have logistics of that because he's the podcast man. But anyway, yeah. So what do you think about that? I think that's cool.

In Huntsville, I still won't listen to the podcast. Yeah, I know. In Huntsville, Alabama, where we're going to be this weekend. I was just looking at the tour days. We got one of the best examples of this ever. Part of how this came up with us is that people do this all the time in person at the shows. They want to give us like their red cred, basically, which is cool. So we hear all kinds of stories like this.

And one of the best ones was this lady in Huntsville, where we're going again, this. weekend she came up and said something like I shot my husband she was like I shot my husband then the cop shot me then I can't remember exactly how she said it was unreal she shot her husband and she got shot by the cops but the thing is this woman looked like a 15 year 20 years older version of you right now and you're wearing like I mean you like you look nice is my point She didn't look like the lady that would be saying this is what I'm saying. She looked like a logger. She was like a middle-aged logger lady.

And then she comes up saying that shit. So that was fun. Are you coming this weekend? Yes. For sure? The whole time? I don't know about the whole time. My daddy wants to come.

Oh, man. I was just thinking the other night on stage about this. I was like, oh, I don't know. I don't know that he wants to. There's a lot of stuff I promise you 100% guaranteed he don't want to listen to. Are you talking about me? Yeah, but I mean, I can, if he's there, I ain't got to do it. But that's some of my favorite shit.

And I want you to hear it. I definitely, I want you to hear it, but I don't want him to hear it. I'll tell him to step out for a minute. No. If you come with your dad, that means y'all would both leave and you'd drive him back home after it was over. Yeah, probably. Kristen and Jameson said they might. come to. Well, Kristen ain't going to want her it neither, but that's fine. She doesn't care.

But your dad, though, let's do. Yeah, I don't know. Well, anyway, we'll see. Okay. I mean, he may not come anyway, because, you know, he goes to sleep at 7 o'clock. Yes, he does. A man after my own heart. So, what are you, so what are you looking at? Why are you looking at my tour days for? I was trying to save which nights you were doing an earlier show. on this weekend? Yeah. Probably, they're all probably about the same, right?

Well, you got two on Friday and two on Saturday. I didn't know that you had two both nights. Mm-hmm. But I do now. That's pretty standard as a comedy club. Because I Googled it. Okay. What else?

Money. Not stories, money. I was wanting to talk about money. What about it? Like what kind of value, how highly do you value money? How much money would you, if you could just snap your fingers, how much money would you want? I mean, because anybody would want a whole shit low. What's the amount?

All the money. I don't know. No, I don't know. Like, I just think that, I was thinking about this the other day. I was listening to some other podcasts, people talking about greed and stuff, like all these Wall Street bankers. That's never enough for them and whatever else. And I was just thinking about how, like, I mean, I'm terrible with money. But I also just don't, like, I don't know.

You're not like I want money. Right. I just want to have enough to not have to worry about money. Yeah, that's good. But I don't care about like. The actual number. Exactly. Or yachts or whatever.

You know what I mean? Uh-huh. Like, I just want, because. I got for the first 31 years of my life, well, from age like whatever, 10 or 11 on, I've been worrying about money, or at least if not worried about I've been having to think about it the entire time. And like, it's been nice not having to, you know, worry as much lately. But I'm saying like, I mean, I don't know about you, but the amount of money that we have right now, if I could guarantee consistency, like this would be fine with me. Forever. She's not, I don't think she's sold everybody. She's just looking around like, I'm just thinking, I like living here. I don't want to like move back to, like, I like California.

I like living out here. I would like to buy a house instead of renting. Yeah. But the cost of houses makes me nauseous. A little nauseous. Yeah, it's unreal. Just, I don't think I've talked about this on the podcast before. Some of you all are, I'm sure, in California, you're not going to be at all surprised.

Nobody's going to be surprised by this, but still, I like to tell this because I think it's pretty wild, whether you're surprised by it or not. So, you and I met at this bar in Cookville called Crawl Daddy's. There was this couple, this married couple who were probably in their, like, mid to, like, 30s or early 40s, maybe. like they weren't I don't know what you're talking about the ones that sold the house oh our friends

they're they were in their thirties probably right at the time okay and they I mean they were good tippers and like people you knew that they like had money I didn't know how much money they had or whatever never really cared

but then but yeah they're like oh they've got money that's as far as it went after we moved out here or right as we were moving out here they put their house up for sale in cookville and so cookville tennessee halfway between Nashville and knoxville they put their house up for sale how many square feet was that house do you remember 7100 700 it looked like genuinely it looked like some mt v crib shit to me like it was ridiculous it was on the land. I don't know.

And they ended up selling that for what, 700 something thousand? They were asking 749 for it. But I think they ended up taking less. Okay. So let's say they sold it for $700,000. It's this like 7,100 square foot. Mansion. Straight up mansion in Cookville, Tennessee for around $700,000.

We live in Burbank, California. suburb of LA, if anybody don't know, in a house that's 8, 800. 850 square feet. It's got two bedrooms, one bathroom. And we rent. So the boys, yeah, and we rent, and so our boys share a bedroom. And there's a little, like, guest house that I put in quotation marks. Y'all heard me talk about that on here before.

Katie uses her office in like a playroom and stuff, and it's got a half bath in it. Fenced in backyard, the yard's very pretty, but it's not particularly big or anything. and we're in a fairly good school district. I don't know what the value of this house would be, but it would be somewhere between $800,000 and $900,000. And I know that because the house two doors down sold for $899,000, I think. So for $899,000. And in the one right next door, do you know what that sold for?

No, because it was sold before they ever moved out. Right. So, but yeah, one, two doors down, very comparable, $900,000. That's insane. I was in Columbus, Ohio, this weekend. And I was hanging out with my buddy Matt. Shout out to Matt Ward. He's a real estate guy now in Columbus.

And we got to talking about this. And he showed me, he was like, this is what you can get for $850,000 in Columbus. And, I mean, Columbus, Ohio is not Cookville, Tennessee. And it was still, I mean, it was supremely nice houses. You know what I mean? I don't know if I can call them like literal mansions, but. I mean, close to it. This house in Tennessee, even in Cookville, might sell for like $70,000.

Yeah, right, the house that we live in. And if you bought it in like a smaller town like Salina, it might be worth about $40. 40,000, yeah. Uh-huh. Because I mean, this house needs a lot of work. A lot of work done. Yeah. I mean, I like this house, but yes, it does.

Yeah, it just, it needs it. It's old. I mean, it should have done to it. But anyway, so yeah, that, yeah, it's insane how much more expensive it is just to live out here for sure. But again, as long as I just had some level of confidence that I could pay that, you know what I mean, that it wouldn't be a problem. By pay that, I mean just live comfortably here, wherever it is that we want to live. That's really all I care about. Okay.

Why are we talking about money? Because I was just thinking the other day about greed and everything. And I think that, obviously, it's not universal or anything clearly, but like, I've always kind of thought that growing up super poor is like growing up with a parent that's an alcoholic or whatever, in that I feel like it typically has one of, you go one of two ways, which is like you either end up an alcoholic too, or, you just don't hardly drink at all, if it ought, right? Yeah, and, you know, just don't want nothing to do with it.

I feel like being poor is the same, or growing up poor is the same way. It could make you, like, care way too much about money. Well, that, that is a damn, that's a statistical fact right there, is that odds are, if you born, poor, grow up poor, you're probably going to always be poor, statistically. Statistically, statistically speaking. because yeah, you don't know shit about money, but no, I mean in terms of how you feel about it or think about it. It makes you care a whole lot about it or not care very much at all about it is what I'm trying to say.

And I've always been in the latter category, much to my detriment at many times over the years, because not caring about money can get you into some shitty situations. Didn't we talk about this a while back just about being from a small town and not really understanding how much money people can make. Oh, God, yeah. I mean, are you saying we talked about it on the podcast? I feel like we talked about this on the podcast. Maybe we just had this discussion about...

We talked about, it was more about like... I remember the conversation. It was about growing up in small towns and like how people were there in terms of gay people and black people and that type of stuff versus like... Was there more to it than that? I don't know. I feel like we had this discussion, but I don't know if it was on the podcast. No, but you're right.

Well, we've mentioned many times before on the podcast, Drew will talk about his parents. He has talked about him before. His dad worked for the railroad. His mom's a teacher. Right. And so, like, in Sunbright, he was like a rich kid almost. He was like upper middle class, he said. If your parents are teachers, then, like, you've got money.

Right. No, in Salina, what I always tell people is in Salat, where I grew up, you're a rich kid, you're pretty much a rich kid if your parents are together and both have a job. Like, that pretty much makes you like privileged or whatever in a town like Salina. Yeah. And so no, dude, hell yeah. I mean, hell, I'd do a bit about it on stage or, I mean, I used to. I'm not currently doing it, but about, about. realizing that about getting older and realizing how much different my childhood was than most

people or just or everybody in a town like salina but particularly because like even in salina but even after like i'll say this though like i guess it it i don't know it's weird to me because i was i mean i had already went off to college at utie and then i can't remember how old i was but i was dating a guy and i remember him saying just like in in just general conversation that his dad's bonus, like he was saying it in general conversation about his dad's yearly bonus being like less than what it normally is. And he only got 50,000 that year. And I didn't say anything because in my head I was just like, fuck, what?

Yeah. Like a bonus? Like that is, that is, that's like really good money for way, like where I'm from. Oh, yeah. Like for your salary. For sure. Really good money. I mean, I remember, like, one of my buddies I grew up with was like, you know, again, that situation, you know, oh, they've got money.

Like, oh, he's got money. He's spoiled, whatever. And I know that his dad, I know, made like, I think it was like, something. $73,000 a year or something like that at the time. And that was it. And like, yeah, again, he was like, you know, oh, they've got money or whatever. Yeah, no, people, and it goes both ways. People don't realize, like, what.

But it's also because it, the cost of living there is a lot less. That's, I mean, yeah, that's most of it. So in your mind, like, if you're like, okay, 50,000, that's a good job. I'll, you know, go to college. and get a job making $50,000 and I'll move to this bigger city. And then you're like, fuck. I have no money. That right there is almost exactly what happened to me, to us.

I was making. Good money. I was making very good money at the Department of Energy. Or, again, if you had told me right when I left Slina, I'd go to college, oh, you're going to get out of college and you're going to get this job, and it's going to pay this amount. I'd have been like, fucking right. Yeah.

That's what I'm talking about. But then we do that. But then we got up there and like, and I mean, yeah, we've got kids, but like, we have two kids. But I mean, my, like, that's not egregious. My parents raised three children on a lot less. That's what I'm saying. And we got up there to Knoxville and, like, between student loans and credit card debt and shit I had from college and just everything else, just, yeah, we were living paycheck to paycheck that entire time that we were there. and again part of that is because like

again yeah we grow up poor you don't yeah like I'm terrible with money I don't have good money management skills at all that's a huge part of it but also like it's just yeah and I remember that blow in my mind like whenever that became clear to me that was the case I was like I just don't understand I don't understand how this isn't

but I mean that's also just a thing with like in general you know like the middle class disappearing and all that it's like you used to be able to, if you had a factory job, you could own a home and have a car and have, you know, a couple kids or whatever. If you worked there for a while and, you know, like in Detroit and shit.

But the thing is, is a house that cost 40,000 how many years. I mean, didn't. Well, that's what I'm saying. Wages. Yeah. For example. What you're about,

what you're about to say is exactly the point of all this. The guy that we rent from, he said that he bought this house when? Like 93, what? In 93 for 400? For some reason I want to say 420, but I feel like that's not the right answer. I can't remember. And if you wanted to sell it right now, he could sell it easily for 800,000.

Yeah. He could tell us to move out tomorrow, put it on the market, and it would be sold in a week. Right. So, yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's exactly what has happened. And like, people are not making enough money. Wages have not even never. kept up with inflation and everything.

It just, things cost way, way, way more now and people don't make a commensurate amount more than they used to. And yeah, but like the older generation stuff,

they don't realize that. No, they don't understand that. That's what I'm saying, is like the older generation is just like, you should, you know,

get a job and buy a house before you get married and start having kids. And it's like, Like, you can't do all of that? No. No, hell no. Yeah, all those different articles you sell all the time about, you know, like,

and it's a lot of people have talked about it, but like, why aren't millennials buying diamonds? You know, like that type of shit. And the horse is just like, you fucking kidding me? Oh, my goodness. Because we ain't got a goddamn money. Like, and, uh, yeah, and it's just. I mean, they're spending, we are just spending money on other things.

things. Well, I mean, yeah, that, but I think they go hand in hand. Like, millennials don't give a shit about buying diamonds because, like, they understand that there's better shit they can spend money. Exactly, right. That's what I'm saying. They have to prioritize in a different way because they don't have as much money. So it still comes down the same thing, I think. We were supposed to do 20 and we're at almost 25, so we should get off here because I don't know what Corey and Drew are up to also. I know that breaks your heart. Okay, whatever. All right, well, say bye.

Bye. Love you. Love you. Skew. Skew. Thank you all for listening to the well-read show. We'd love to stick around longer, but we got to go. Tune in next week if you got nothing to do.

Thank you, God bless you, good night, and skew.