wellRED podcast - #7 - Ham Satan Gets Engaged/ Viva Sauce Vegas
Episode Date: March 22, 2017On this weeks episode, we give you the rundown of our weekend in Vegas, and our appearance on THE VIEW! March madness, concerts, gambling, GLUTTONY, booze, comedy shows, and life changing commitment...s... this weekend really had it all. Of course the conversation inevitably shifted to some of the down right silly current events creeping their way out of Washington... so we cuss about that too! Go to wellREDcomedy.com for tickets to our upcoming shows, merchandise, and to pick up a copy of our book The Liberal Redneck Manifesto: Draggin Dixie Outta The Dark Subscribe and tell your friends!!! SKEEEEEWWWW
Transcript
Discussion (0)
And we thank them for sponsoring the show.
Well, no, I'll just go ahead.
I mean, look, I'm money dumb.
Y'all know that.
I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life.
And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion.
Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing.
But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.
It's just like, you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending.
A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis.
I'm not going to lie.
I can be one of those people.
Like, let me ask you right now.
Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people.
People across the ske universe, I should say.
Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year?
Do you even know?
Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery?
Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main?
Because that's a thing that we do in this society.
Do you know how much you spend on that?
It's probably more than you think.
But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better.
and it's called Rocket Money.
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and I've just been paying to learn Spanish
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Also, a fun one, I'd said it before,
but I got an app,
lovely little app where you could, you know,
put your friend's faces onto funny reaction gifts
and stuff like that.
So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two,
those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies.
You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball looking twin fellas.
Yeah, so that was money.
What was that a reply gift for?
Just when I did something stupid.
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what's up well reders well redites well redditions my favorite butt holes how are y'all doing
uh it's cori here we got some dates and we'd like to plug of course we'd
got, let's see, Oxford, Mississippi sold out, Bentonville, Arkansas sold out, but you can get tickets
in Los Angeles, California, Brooklyn, New York, Providence, Rhode Island, New Brunswick, New Jersey,
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, Indianapolis, Indiana.
Unfortunately, both our Columbus shows are sold out and our Liberty Township, Ohio show is sold
out, but you can still drive to Dayton, there's still some tickets left there, Richmond, Virginia,
Virginia Beach, Virginia, Huntsville, Alabama, Vancouver, California, California, California, California, California,
Montgomery, Edmonton, we're going to Canada, y'all.
They're going to let us across the G.D. Boer, and we're going to founder ourselves on gravitators and donuts.
It's going to be awesome.
Also, I can't believe it's taking us this long, but we are coming to Chicago, Illinois, one of my favorite places on Earth.
It's one of the first big stages I stepped on in my comedy career.
I went and tried out for Second City and did that whole thing and got very humbled when I was,
a, why was, but a we 16-year-old.
Also, Boston, Massachusetts.
We're going to come back at the historic Wilbur Theater.
Good Lord, what a weird year this has been.
That's going to be amazing, and I can't wait.
So, God, I had to take a breath after that.
I'm sorry.
Go to well-read comedy.com.
That's W-E-L-L-R-E-D comedy.com.
Spelled just like the podcast where you can get those tickets.
You can get merchandise such as T-shirts, tank tops,
coosies, and of course the sponsor for this podcast, our book, The Liberal Redneck Manifesto,
Dragon Dixie Out of the Dark. You can get that on our website or Amazon.com or wherever books are sold.
If you like to go, if you're an old stupid hippie like me and you like to actually smell books and stuff,
you can get it at Barnes & Noble, books a million, go in there and you'll see our big dumb faces.
And it's a good book. It's currently number one in religious humor on Amazon. We're super
proud of that. Thank you guys so much for helping it climb the chart.
and okay so on this episode we are in a hotel room in Oklahoma City we were about to do a show at the
performance lab there and we had a blast those are two of the best shows we've ever had it was
phenomenal thanks to everybody who put that on and for having us it was great we were super tired
but the crowd was so good that they made it awesome we were tired because we'd been in Vegas for the
past three days so that's kind of what we discussed on this podcast we were in Vegas awesome
for very different reasons.
Trey was there opening for Jason Isbell,
our generation's greatest singer-songwriter.
There's no debate.
There's no discussion.
That's inarguable.
He just is.
Drew was there betting on basketball and losing his ass.
And I was there doing a thing.
I'm going to tell you what the thing was.
But I was there doing a thing that a lot of people,
probably myself included,
didn't think that I would ever do.
So we were all three in Vegas for very different reasons,
but they all, we all came together and included ourselves in each of the things that the other person was there doing.
It was great. It was fun.
We didn't get, there was no hangover type situation.
We didn't get black, you know, that's not what this podcast is going to be about.
But we had fun in Vegas.
We had a blast.
And so we're going to talk about that.
Also, as of course, how it always goes, we're going to get into the current political climate.
But put our own little well-read spin on it to try to make you giggle about it.
instead of throwing your head into a goddamn wall every five minutes like we know you want to.
So please listen to the podcast.
If you've already subscribed, thank you.
If you're just listening randomly, please subscribe.
So it'll keep showing up on your device.
Tell your friends about it.
We love it when we climb up the charts.
And we want to keep being able to do this because, as you can tell, we like to hear ourselves talk.
And we love to talk to y'all.
So thank you for listening.
Go buy our book.
Come to one of our shows.
Or just tweet at us and say, what's up.
We like that too.
so thank you for listening to the well-read podcast we'll see you next week on the podcast or on tour
let's ski
well are you talking about the what you said a minute ago I don't what I didn't record that
I'm just curious okay I just started recording
y'all went to the going to go and carrel yes we all want to open with this weekend
we'd have to so we're in Oklahoma City right now at a spring hill suites the height of luxury
They got really zoomed in photographs as art on the wall.
Is that what that is?
Three by eight close up of a leaf.
You're right.
That is what that is.
Well, me and Corey pulled in and we like to eat.
We got here two hours before Drew did or about an hour and a half,
and we like to eat four or five hours before the show,
so we don't spend the whole show pooping.
And we pulled in, and lo and behold.
wouldn't you know it?
Adjoining the parking lot of the Spring Hill Suites in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, is a golden corral.
Again, just the height of luxury.
Yeah, and if anybody don't know what that is, it's a feeding trough for...
Yeah, that is my...
Peelie squeal.
And it's a buffet.
It's just like an Americanized buffet.
I mean, I'm sure about...
Their commercials are all over.
damn place.
You don't know how buffets work?
It's like that only works.
Yeah, and me and Corey and his fiancé,
well, damn, I buried the lead on that.
You have, isn't I?
Well, I'm sorry.
Me and Gordon's fiance went in there and ate a bunch of different kinds of cheese
and gravy, and now I want to die.
So I want to die.
I love the idea, excuse me,
me imagining us continuing to get fans and, you know,
just rock the world as comedic geniuses.
and someone goes back and puts together that this week's in Roearnin
to explain what happens to y'all in like 10 or 20 years.
Yeah.
I think there's a TMZ.
Trade Crowder, dead of a heart attack in his pool.
They think it's drugs.
Nile.
Ain't drugs.
I got it right here.
It was chicken.
So much chicken.
Well, hell, I guess let's talk about that.
We just got back.
That's the whole week in Rearning?
Well, yeah, you can talk about running in Vegas.
I'm sure y'all did that.
Well, that's the thing.
Not as much as you'd think.
No, and that's why we had to make up for it with the golden crowd.
We felt bad about not burning in Vegas.
I had a footlong chili cheese dog at one point.
I mean.
Yeah, in Vegas.
So, yeah, we just got back from Las Vegas.
We went me, Corey, his fiancé, my wife and Corey's buddy Chris, the fifth wheel Robertson.
He won't listen to this.
I know.
If you do, I'm just fucking with you, Chris.
But anyway, we went to Wolfgang Pucks spot at Mandalay Bay, which is called Lupo.
Loopho.
Lupo?
And I mean, it was fucking, it was very goddamn good.
It was extremely good.
Why don't you just said you ate a chili dog?
That was for lunch, baby.
So this was for, but we didn't run, though.
We actually were very sensible because that was the first thing we did, and we were going to go gambling shit.
And again, I didn't want to spend all my gambling time.
What did you get at Wolfgang?
me and Katie got
I'm going to name my kid, Wolfgang.
We and Katie got a big ass pork chop, which was heavenly, wasn't it?
That pork shop, one of the better pork chops ever had my life.
It absolutely was.
And again, man, I know Wolfgang Puck is who he is.
Right.
But we're still in Vegas, so I'm expecting like,
all right, this is going to be like a really watered down version of shit.
Oh, no, that's a big thing.
I told him that you told me.
I know, and I didn't know that.
I knew that they had a bunch of shit.
There's no way he listens to the podcast.
His wife's a food critic,
and that's one of their favorite places to go.
because they can do like their three or four favorite restaurants within a mile.
Sure.
And we got some fried calamari and this beef carpaccio, which is like, buddy, you know, very thinly sliced raw beef with a...
I don't ruin quite as hard as y'all, but I have had a salad today and some peanuts on a plane, and y'all are killing me.
Uh-huh.
I don't even know what capo is.
What is it?
It's like steak tartar.
Oh, I've had that.
Yeah, with capers.
This one also had...
They had some kind of green shit.
Yeah, a real savory.
Yeah, dude.
Arugula, then they put lemon zest and just drizzled some lemon juice over it.
But he got, I mean, it's so fucking fresh.
I'm breathing so.
I know.
I said before we started, the people at home may not know.
We know.
Y'all's audio is not what you think it is.
But anyway, Corey actually spends a lot of time each week editing out both mine and
is heavy, heavy mouth breathing.
And I know that a lot of it's still left in there,
but I can't get the whole two hours.
Because we do just so much of it.
Yeah.
I mean, that's just how we breathe.
This is also meta in the sense of like we're doing this week in Roan.
And then y'all's breathing is a direct side effect of all the reining you've done.
Without a doubt.
Hell yeah.
And like right now, at this moment, I mean, we're less than 30 minutes removed from the Golden Corral.
So like I'm saying, the breath.
Yes.
That's what I.
And there is still, I've still got.
chicken here.
Like it's not even let it's not even gotten.
Yeah, it's not gotten past my chest yet.
Like, there's still chicken here.
We had a, but, but I'm saying, you know, it was a fancy place.
So, you know, the portions were normal.
No, but they were what they should be.
So we didn't, like, go in like you, like we normally do.
On St. Patrick's Day, I had a place that you would have loved.
It was, it was at the same, it was at Mandalay Bay.
And it was, they had an Irish pub there.
And again, I was expecting, all right, this is going to be bullshit.
it.
Buddy, I had the fishing chips and the shepherds pie and a bowl of potato leeks soup and whatever the cabbage and potato.
It was so fucking fire.
So, yeah, I did ruin all that day.
God damn.
I forgot about that.
Well, I, so I was in Vegas until late Thursday night, which we'll talk about what we did there, I guess, after we get done with this weekend, running.
Yeah.
I was doing buffet Thursday morning.
I got in Wednesday night, and I got in about two hours before Corey, instead of waiting on him.
at the airport. I was just like, fuck it.
I went to get my own room and go to bed because I was miserable and sick and tired.
So I did that thinking, and then I'll catch up with y'all the next day.
But, Trey, you didn't get into four, which I didn't even know when you were getting in.
And Corey stayed like a mile and a half for me, it turned out.
And I was such a lazy piece of garbage.
And I just wanted to watch basketball and gamble that I was like, well, I mean, obviously,
I'm not going to spend gamble money on a cab.
Yeah, sure.
And I'm not going to waste 30 minutes taking a train up to where Corey's at.
I'm just going to go.
So I went to a breakfast buffet by myself.
So I don't know if there's like a metaphor for being the sad man, but a breakfast buffet in Vegas by yourself, that's it.
That's pretty rough.
Yeah, that's down there.
They had like all their signs up that they always have, like Asian, Italian, American.
But it was breakfast food, but they, like, you could tell they tried to sort of make it.
Like they put sausage links in the Italian section.
But all it was was, you know, college cafeteria breakfast food.
So I did that.
Then I got drunk for free because I bet.
a lot of money, probably about
400 bucks. Not all of it was my money. I don't know if that's
illegal, but I bet it a lot of money for other people
on basketball and got drunk
for free, well, other than the money that I spent
gambling and losing. Goddamn
Winthrop. Fuck y'all to death.
They're not
sponsoring this week's episode. We're good.
I hooked up with y'all, which I'll let y'all tell
that story because that's more about you two.
And then I took
a red eye Thursday night to Buffalo
New York to do what I call
Black Friday with my law school friends, which the
first Friday of the NCAA basketball tournament every year.
My friends and I try to get together.
And we run in a very different way, which is we drink liquor and beer all day while
watching basketball.
And we have rules like if there's a buzzer, hit or miss, you take a shot.
But if they make it and it's another dog, you got to take three.
Hits.
All kinds of stuff like that.
And we had on matching Game Bib overalls of different team colors.
I have a pair of UT checkered orange and white.
Yeah, I didn't know you had those.
I'm very jealous of those.
I saw that picture.
Yeah, that's fun.
You look great.
I felt great.
One of my favorite parts, we went to brunch, and we were leaving, and there were these two girls drunk.
They were drunk at a bar, which is fine, on a Friday at noon.
It was St. Pag's Day, but they weren't dressed up.
They weren't with a group, and they judged us for being ridiculous because we ought to imagine it.
One girl goes literally turned as we walked by them and went, Jesus Christ, to which my friend Teter said to her.
wouldn't have you
what do you say could have you
don't want you and walk out
that hits that does have
a very quick story about
we left back that was this morning
so I had to get on the plane
to get here at Oklahoma City from Vegas
mine and Corey's flight left at 615
we'll hell we'll get into that
a little bit too so I had to leave
the hotel room and my wife
and kids were with me
this week or the past few days
in Vegas we had to get up at
me and Katie woke up at like, I think, at 4.30 and then got the shit together and got the boys and, like, left Mandalay Bay at 5 a.m.
Right?
And when, Mandalay Bay, the way it's set up to get to the parking garage, you literally have to walk through the casino.
You know, they designed those things that way.
So, like, to get anywhere, you have to walk by the damn machines or whatever.
But that includes, you know, little baby children, too.
There ain't no other way around it.
Can we pause?
Yeah.
Oh, God, boy.
Hit that button?
Yes.
What button do you want me here?
I didn't hit a button.
I had to find button to hit.
This is going to make up three extra files again.
Go ahead.
Even if you hit pause and not the record button?
Well, I don't remember what I was saying.
Okay, so here we go.
So, yeah, you know, so you have to walk through the casino floor to get out.
And so we're walking through there at 5 a.m.
with my 4 and 5-year-old boys.
I mean, they went to sleep at 9.
You know, we got them up to live.
leave, but there's still some haggard drunks about in there.
Of course.
Yeah, and I wasn't thrilled about that.
You know, I felt weird about having them there the whole time anyway, but it's not like
we didn't, we didn't design a family vacation in Vegas.
I mean, Daddy was working, you know what I mean?
And they don't ever come with me on these trips or nothing.
So, I mean, you know, it was cool, but I felt weird about having small children in
Vegas, period.
And so we're walking through there, and these two middle-aged drunk women,
were walking by
and one of them said something in the effect of
I can't believe those kids
that those kids are still awake right now
and I turned around
you know I don't fuck with mornings
fuck no anyway
and I turned around
and I was just like
I said something
I was like
they just woke up
don't fucking worry about it
and Katie was like what
what are you talking to
what just happened
I was like bitch
don't worry about it
whatever
some bitch back there
but anyway
that you were talking about them
judging you
even though they were drunk or whatever
for having an overall zone
that's how that's related
you made me think of that
that kind of shit pisses me off so bad
well it's like it ain't that
why would you even
I don't know why you would it was 5 a.m.
Right.
No toddler on earth can't even
make it to 5 a.m.
Yeah I don't know what I mean like
midnight because they probably did
that's what I thought
yeah they probably they couldn't have realized
it was that
late because I don't know how your first thought wouldn't be.
I get why they woke up
over the shoulder that, but I kind of wish you to
turn around and just like dress them down
formally. Okay, well,
one of the biggest reasons I over the
shoulder did, and I would anyway, but that leads
into something else I want to talk about that Corey can
jump in on. I wanted to get
to the airport. The flat left at 6.15,
we were walking out at 5. The airport's
like 10 minutes away. I was
aiming to get there at 5.15. I always
aimed to get there an hour out. I got there
55 minutes out. 5.25 minutes out.
520, okay?
For a 6.15 a.m. flight on a Saturday morning.
I can only imagine.
Imagine what?
How long the line was in Vegas?
Buddy.
Well, hold on.
Wait a minute.
Hold on now.
Why do you say that?
And you say, you agreed with me.
No, at first, but then, now that I'm,
like, in hindsight, now I'm like, yeah, that was probably
fucking stupid of me, just because it's Vegas.
And I would say that.
But a Saturday?
I would say those are the cheapest flats because it's when people want to get there.
That's what I was thinking.
So not only was.
there are a lot of people there, it was, you know, people who don't go to Vegas to floss as much, you know, poor people, which means they don't have, you know. You have. If you travel out, you know, it's usually rich people who have TSA pre-check or business type people. It's usually them. In other words, all those fucking lines were super goddamn long. It's also cost money to check a bag. Rich people usually check bags. People who, I'm just saying I can imagine it was everybody. Okay. Well, what really?
More bags through security.
My thought process was, again, I mean, I always aim for like an hour.
You know, that's like, to me, that's the rule of thumb for a domestic flight, you know, typically.
Right.
I thought, but isn't it an hour before you board now?
Well, maybe whatever.
No, I know.
Either way.
But I'm telling you.
But I'm telling you what the Delta website says, which, again, this isn't what people say.
They're like, you know, it's two hours for domestic, three hours.
for international, which I don't really know
why that's...
I just flew international.
It's not...
That's not necessary.
I'm sure it's not,
because I don't know why that would be any different.
Yeah, they shake your shit on the way into a country,
not happening.
Well,
maybe that's...
No, I'm stupid.
No, I mean, my thought process...
You might be right.
My thought process was,
I thought, you know,
if you're there for work,
you know, a lot of conferences
and bullshit in Vegas,
you leave on Friday.
If you're there for pleasure,
you leave on Sunday.
You know,
Friday and Sunday are the heavy, that they cost more, those are the heavy travel days.
If you're at a conference in Oklahoma, you're going to go home to see your wife and kids on Friday.
If you're at a conference in Vegas, you plan on staying at least an extra night.
That's true.
They stay, and then they leave it on Saturday.
Well, apparently, you're right, and that is what happened, because either way, it was absolutely a madhouse in there this morning.
And since, okay, as I am wont to do.
That airport ain't ever not busy, though.
Well, I read out at the longest red eye.
I know that now, I've never, the first time I've been to that airport.
I bought these tickets like a week ago or something.
I waited way too late.
And I bought multi-city.
So I bought Vegas, Oklahoma, Oklahoma back to L.A., right?
And seriously, for economy, for coach, whatever, regular cabin, it was like $1,200 for the whole thing.
First class was $1,500.
I ain't never heard of a difference that small.
So I hand the God.
So you know what I did.
I said, shit.
and I got first class
dudes sincerely
I'm not exaggerating at all
if I had not done that
I would not be sitting here right now
I would not have
no you wouldn't have because okay there was a separate
there's a separate security line for first class
and I even with that line
I still I walked on the plane
and they were about to close the doors
and the lady was like oh you made it Mr. Crowder
we didn't think you were going to make it like
buddy I got a completely related story
and it's the same outcome I was
not going to make it to Vegas.
As you guys know, it was like snowing in New York, and I was worried anyway because any delay
would have ruined my whole deal because I was going to be in Vegas for 24 hours.
Well, I was packing, and I don't even know why I had the Delta app open.
I don't know what I was checking.
There was nothing to check.
I guess I was probably making sure the flight wasn't delayed or canceled because of the weather.
I just happened to look down while I was packing my underwear and thought, man, JFK,
I haven't been there.
Oh, fuck.
I booked this out of JFK instead of LaGuardi.
Liguardia is right by my house.
Yeah, and Cornyance is.
JFK, depending on what time of day, it's
fucking far away.
So I looked, I was going to get a cab.
Cab was 45 minutes.
I took the commuter rail, and I got there.
It was the longest line I've ever seen in JFK.
And what I did was I just went to the first class line
and just smiled and was real white.
I just made it all the way through with nobody questioned me
until I got to the last guy.
My plane had been boarding for 20 minutes by the time I got to him.
He said,
kind of see your boarding pass. As I showed it to him, I said, it's not sky priority or whatever
it was supposed to be. I said, but they, and I just pointed over my head, said to come through
here because I'm running late. And I guess he just believed, since I've made it through four
layers of they, he just let me go through. I got on my plane, and they checked me in.
I scanned in. I got on my, I sat down. The last person sat down, my phone rang. I answered
it because it was a New York number and made me curious. It was Delta saying, it looks like
you missed your flight, Mr. Morgan. We just want to make sure you're not, you know,
close because we're going to close the gate and I was like I'm on the plane but that's how late
I was yeah well it uh it did not hit that I'm here I didn't tell you about this but you're
speaking of the TSA pre-check line so I sat through the regular berm line to get to where I was going
and still I do it only beat you by 15 minutes like no I know and you got there 30 minutes earlier
than I did yeah and to my standards late right you know but I was like I was letting Amber
sleep because I care about her not y'all and so I was letting her sleep and so I was letting her sleep
And we, dude, I got there and I saw...
As long as you admit that all this is about how much you hate us and not about your weirdness.
Sure.
And so, yeah, and I was like, we got there and I thought everything's fine.
And then, and you notice this, Los Vegas Air Force is something else.
Like, you get...
You just gamble everywhere you mean?
Well, that is...
That too.
But, like, you know, usually you check your bag and then you're not at least that far from security.
It's weird, right?
You go to that tunnel and there's like that big round room with all those escalators coming out.
It made me.
I'm mad.
But then you get through security and you think, okay.
That's what he's talking about.
No, I'm talking about.
Yes.
Yes.
Those too.
But, like, just from bag check to security is a whole fucking thing.
So that.
From security to the goddamn turnal is unreal.
Right.
I was late as hell.
I finally got through security.
And then I'm like, okay, fuck.
Finally, there's a sign of D gates.
I'm like, okay, I'm here.
You get around, and then you round the corner and it's like, it just ends.
You're like, what the, this is a train station.
Why I'm at a fucking train station.
And you have to take a train, and then you get off the train,
and you get off of it, and you walk into this big, fucking weird-ass round room with all these escalators.
You're still not even at all there.
And, like, I was like, I'm not going to make this fucking fight.
It looks like a dystopian nightmare.
Well, I think that is.
Dude, metaphor.
My point in the airport.
I don't, by the way, just for the record, anyone listening, and I'll just tell you all, I'm curious your thoughts.
I think I know yours.
I don't like Vegas.
Don't have a lot.
I mean, it's a bit.
It bears me out.
I don't enjoy gambling that much.
There's nothing else for me to do.
I'm not single.
I like restaurants.
I do feel like if I went with Andy for four days and we went out to eat at our time every night.
I kind of think.
Yeah, I'm going to do a Circus Salaid and that wasn't the coolest thing I've ever known.
I've just never had to get too much.
No.
It feels like I'm at spring break with old motherfuck.
I'm with you because it didn't check out for you that I didn't like Vegas because it's such a show city.
But I think if I, well, right, it's Burns, Mascarad and Chows.
We don't even have time to go into that.
I just, yeah, it doesn't hit for me that much.
But if I go back, I'm like, yeah, okay, there's really good food,
and I can see Penn & Taylor.
That would hit for me.
But the point that I'm going to get into about the TSA Precheck is that that is a thing.
And apparently this dude that had been in front of me waiting in that huge line the whole time,
he gets up to the front.
He looks like, what's the was that was with Steve Jobs?
Steve Wozniakian, however you say his name.
He looked like that, so there's a visual.
And he's sitting there.
No, there's no, I mean, that hit.
But he puts his ticket.
up there and the guy goes, oh, sir,
did you know that your TSA pre-check?
You actually could have just walked straight up there.
He goes, oh, God, fucking, damn it.
That guy's my spirit animal, man.
I was in such a bad mood
because I thought I was going to be late,
and I was tired, but that was like Peter Pan,
that was like Peter Pan's happy thought.
I was about to fucking fly myself to the homestity.
That's great when you get the moment.
Dude, it was good.
We were hung over on the spring break when I was in college,
and we went to Disneyland because my friend Tim had been banging this girl
ever since the last spring break and at work there
and she got us free tickets.
I've never felt that bad in my life.
I had two hours of sleep.
I was so hung over.
We got there and there was a parade going on as soon as we walked in the gates.
Immediately I was having us like, there's Mickey, the dwarfs were about.
Hell yeah.
Oh, for sure.
That almost happened to me.
And I had the thought, like, had that happened,
oh, I can't even imagine the rage I would feel.
And that guy, so I totally not express that.
Because you're too lazy to even express rage.
But that, yeah, I wouldn't have screamed like that.
I would have just, you know, sighed and my jowls were to shut for a minute.
Like, fucking damn it.
But because I got in the normal line and then I saw the other line over there.
And I asked a dude working, I was like, hey, man, I'm first class.
And so is there maybe a better line?
line.
He was like, he's like, yeah, the first class line is over there.
You know, he's like, you've got to go around, but it is worth it.
Oh, you didn't mention that you hit.
Right.
Yeah, right.
And when I did that, I was like, man, if I had been too asleep or whatever to have
noticed that and I stood in this fucking line all time and then got up there and they were
like, oh, sort of the first class lines right over here.
Like, I envisioned that happening to me.
You also just wouldn't be here right now.
No, I wouldn't.
You're right.
I wouldn't.
So, all these plain stories.
Who gives a shit?
We went to Vegas for some reasons that we should talk about.
So I went to Vegas because a few months ago, and for anybody that, you know, follows me on Facebook and Twitter and shit,
and you're probably not listening if you don't, so y'all probably are aware of this.
But I booked two shows opening for Jason Isbell and the 400 unit, Jason Isbel.
If you're not aware who he is, you should honestly stop listening.
listening to this and rectify that immediately and then maybe come back to this with the added
context and having had introduced yourself to who I think is America's greatest,
I don't know how to put it exactly like current.
I don't want to say the active, greatest, active songwriter.
This generation's greatest songwriter.
There you go.
Without a doubt.
Yeah, I don't want to say America's greatest living songwriter because there's plenty of,
there's, you know, Dillon's still alive, springsteins out there.
But yes, our generation's greatest songwriter, greatest American.
a songwriter. I truly believe that.
Like, I don't think that's hyperbole. I think that's true.
Do you all agree with that? Do you agree with that? I do.
You think anybody's better than him? No.
Yeah. So, and we felt that way for a long time, the three of us.
And so when I got the opportunity to open for them, I jumped on it immediately,
even though, and we can talk about this a little bit if y'all want to, as comedians,
you know, it's not, I love concerts. I love live music.
music. I love everything about it. But honestly,
comedy and comedy, mixing comedy and live music
onto one bill and one venue as part of one show
is not the best idea.
Normally don't know well. It doesn't, they don't, I love
both of those things so much, but they don't mix well.
Well, I was talking to a guy, Rusty Odom, who runs festivals in Knoxville
and he wants to do one that has comedy and music together. And we were
talking about it, and I was like, dude, you can do that.
You need it to be in a separate space. Yes.
and you don't need people to get overloaded on music and then go to a comedy show
with your break in between.
Because it's different parts of your brain, man.
Right.
That's the thing.
You forget about what you are and you're sort of not thinking, your feeling.
And then in comedy, it's the opposite.
Yes, exactly.
I love the shit out of both of them, but they're two very different things.
And you're right, you can do it like in a festival or whatever,
but you have to have a dedicated comedy space where that's all that's happening there is comedy.
Because the main thing is, because of what you just said,
people at a comedy show
they need to be in a fucking comedy mode
they need to know that they're going to laugh
and be right
right I mean yep
even more than just that though
yeah like the mindset of listening
yeah right
so yes so it's not ideal
but I was not
I never even considered for the fleetingest
of seconds passing it up because
this is a huge
deal for me because
yeah was so amazing
and he's you know
Again, for anybody that's not familiar with him, he's a southern dude, he's from Alabama.
You know, we're cut from the same cloth in a lot of ways.
So anyway, he's just, he's the shit.
So I was immediately, when it came up, the opportunity came up, I said, yes, absolutely.
Fucking A, I will do that, let's do it.
The first date was Wednesday night, March 15th in Anaheim, and then the next night was Thursday, March 16th in Vegas.
both of them at the House of Blues.
And I told you all about that,
and you guys were like, fuck, yeah,
Vegas trip, let's do it.
And then we'll get into your thing in a second.
So that's what we were all doing in Vegas.
And just to, so Jason and the guys literally,
everybody in his band,
everybody that I talked to that worked for him,
all the roadies, his tour manager, everybody,
they were all awesome.
like they were great host awesome dudes
super cool funny all that shit
and it was a surreal experience
just meeting them and hanging out with them and stuff
and the shows were and y'all y'all you got
you two here in the room drew and corey were only at the
Vegas show and that's a bummer because
the Anaheim show actually like
I was stunned and I told jason this we talked about it
after the show and I told him like I was really
shocked at how
Receptive.
Receptive.
The crowd was because of what we already talked about, about how, you know, a music
crowd isn't going to go for comedy most of the time.
Well, in Anaheim, it was, you know, they were on board like the whole time, pretty much
the entire crowd, and it went well and was good.
The show at Vegas was, the show at Vegas was about what I expected them both to be.
You know what I mean?
There were a lot of people that were not into it because they're there to see music.
And, I mean, you know, I don't blame any of them.
and I don't, you know, that's what I expected to happen.
It was still an awesome experience and like it was fine.
I don't want to sound like it was just terrible or nothing because it wasn't.
It was good.
It just wasn't, it's not like our shows on our tour at all.
Lord, no.
An actual comedy show.
It was very, very different.
But still very cool and an awesome experience.
And I mean, hell, you know, I'd do it again or something akin to that again just because of how cool it is.
Remember when he was talking about how you had a good set, and he said,
he calls himself the liberal redneck.
Well, let me tell you, buddy, you're a liberal redneck because that's what I am too.
And then he said, in the words of, and what he was like,
he started singing, you're not alone or whatever.
Remember that?
Right after that.
Yeah, I was a little, I was a little torched.
No, like, not the whole song.
He said, you're a liberal redneck, but he's like,
the words of whatever.
He goes,
you're not alone or something like that.
I do remember that.
And then.
And then.
To death.
Yeah.
But no,
he,
so the first night,
yeah,
I'm glad you brought that up.
Even though it,
maybe it's weird for me to talk about it,
but fuck that.
Hearing him talk about me on stage,
you know,
like at the shows is just,
that's one of those things.
I have to, like,
stop myself and, like,
remind myself how fucking wild it is.
And the first night, when y'all were there in Vegas, when he talked about me, he was like, hey, you know, get a portray or open or whatever.
He played codeine after that.
The first night, he did that and then played outfit, which is my favorite song that he's ever written, which is really saying something because.
Quite a catalog.
Right, exactly.
Well, I think it's because of that line, Southern Man Tells Better Jokes.
And the reason I believe that he's that thoughtful about is when he did outfit later, he laughed when he said Southern Man Tells Better Jokes.
and I just can't help but feel like that was part of it.
And I just want to say, like, Tray had me bring him up because I was backstage with him,
and that was even surreal.
Like, just the general idea, and it was truly an honor to do,
like to just walk out there and be like, hey, Jason Iswell fans,
here's one of my best friends.
Listen to him, tell jokes.
Yeah, so it was an amazing experience.
And Corey also had an amazing experience.
Corey was in the crowd before we get into what he did.
And I was back there thinking, Corey, when he sees me,
walk out of there
is going to
think for two
seconds and I'm
doing time
and he's going to
be so mad.
No, I wasn't mad
I was hoping
how my fuck yet.
You texted me
like that very
sweet text that
you sent me and I said
did you think I was
going to do time and you were
like man I was hoping
you would and I thought
that was really sweet
and I should have
and it took everything
I had in me
I wanted to do one joke
I'd at least open with something
and then what I was
what I was going to say
is welcome the bag of the city of sin
I've been here for a few days
best I can tell that sin is
gluttony you fat fuck
and I thought
if that don't land
I'll have to
keep going and then who knows what will happen.
Yeah.
I didn't think it would have been right to do jokes.
No, I didn't either.
But I wanted to.
Of course.
All right, tell him while you were there.
And I want to say, you said I did come to see Jay Smith, but I didn't get to meet him because
he was too busy before the show and I had to get on that damn red eye afterwards to go to my
friends and get drunk and watch basketball.
And that is why I came, but the other reason I came is because of your deal.
Yeah.
Real quick, because I just remember this.
And then I want you to tell your story.
And I told you this, but I haven't told Drew this yet.
One more aspect of that experience that was really cool to me was I was talking to the stage manager at the House of Blues in Vegas, right?
And they got signs up everywhere for Billy Idol.
Who Phil?
Trent.
Trent.
And Trent was actually talked to Trent quite a bit Thursday night.
He's an awesome dude.
But he was like, I was talking.
I said something about Billy Idol.
And actually, no, he brought it up.
He goes, so Billy Idol's here.
and I was like, yeah, I saw he was here last night and tomorrow night,
and he was like, yeah, he's got a residency here, actually.
He plays, like, three shows a week for like a month,
and then he'll leave for a while,
and then he'll come back for a month and do the three shows a week thing, or whatever.
And I was like, okay, cool.
And he goes, but anyway, last night, some of his guys,
and I don't know exactly what that means,
Rodees, sound guys, whatever,
but he was like, some of his guys were talking to me,
and they were like, and he starts doing the accent.
He was like, so Jason Is Bulls here tomorrow.
That's great. He's awesome.
He's, who's the opening act?
Who's opening for him?
And Trent was like, well, it's kind of weird, actually.
We don't do this kind of thing much, but it's a comedian, actually.
And they were like, oh, okay, all right.
What's the comedian's name?
And he goes, this guy, his name's Trey Crowder, the liberal redneck.
And he said, they were like, what?
We fucking love that guy.
Are you serious?
and he said they came to the show.
He saw him at the show.
They came on Thursday and we're fucking firing up about it.
That hits super hard.
He told me that and I was like,
that is so fucking cool.
That is badass.
Well, this is kind of like what happened to you on Facebook,
Corey.
I mean, your story's cool, but.
Yeah, that's not near as good.
That's a day for a white wording.
Yeah, so I did a thing while we were in Vegas.
I got engaged.
Sorry, fellas.
Yeah, sorry.
That's another thing.
He's all the market.
I've been sitting on that one.
Dude, that's so funny because Amber, you know,
you brought it up at one point because we're starting to get,
now again, not near as many as you are,
but I'm starting to get a lot more comments on things.
Every now than I go through them,
and Amber goes through them now more than me
and says similar things.
Like when you were talking one time, she'll look,
she's like, not one girl.
Yeah.
It's not one girl.
Talking about you being.
and cute and shit like that.
So I put up that I got engaged.
I put up the engagement picture and Amber was scrolling through it.
She's like, man, all these dudes sure are sad that you're getting married.
That made me laugh so much.
That made me, you just made me things.
We always talk about how you called the Outkicked Your Coverage Tour.
Yeah.
You're talking about how much better looking, you know, whatever, whatever.
Amber smells way better than you.
She's out of your league and smells.
Oh, yeah, dude.
She's not only the thing I thought of until I hugged her and congratulated her.
like, God, you smell so much better than him right now.
I bought her.
She smelled like really nice.
She did smell really good.
You smelled like a fucking foot that had been smoking its whole life.
That's not far off.
He's a toe.
He's a toe.
I'm a toe.
Yeah, dude, she smells real good.
And I like that stuff.
I got her two bottles, big-ass bottles of that perfume for Christmas because I don't
ever want to.
I don't know.
If they somehow discontinued, I bought her like fucking gallon jugs of that shit.
Anyway, so yeah.
It was very important to me to do it there.
It's literally the second trace.
Like, hey, I'm opening for his.
She's a fan too, right?
She's a huge fan.
Like, honestly, our relationship is kind of like he's just the soundtrack to our whole goddamn relationship.
I know that because you kept reliving it to her.
Every time he played a sad song, Corey would go,
baby, I used to get fucked up and think about you on this one.
She told me, okay,
be the same thing that you just said when you weren't even around about his bull and y'all's
relationship.
No, about him being the soundtrack to y'all's relationship.
You did it with all the songs, but the sad one was what was hitting for me the most.
That was the soundtrack of when I wanted to date her and she didn't want to date me.
I was going to say, we should probably give a little context to that.
Your fiancé, Amber, y'all had an unrequited love situation for a while with you being the one, you know,
I was the sadden.
I was a sadden, yeah.
We were roommates for two years.
And seriously, she just...
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, fat man.
We all did a different one.
What did you say?
I said fat man.
I said, friend zone.
Friends zone.
Damn.
Triple rose, right there.
One of which was a self-rose.
I was like, man.
The fad-sat friend.
When you said that, I was just like, man, Roe sounds really good.
So, no, we were a roommate for two years, and I introduced her to Jason Isbell, and sincerely, she literally basically said, like, I didn't know that there was such a thing as, that she didn't know there was such a thing that was music that didn't come on the radio.
That was like a thing in her mind.
She was like, this is really good.
What the fuck?
Man, I didn't know there was such a thing as, like, that kind of music.
Well, that's what she meant.
earlier in my life that the idea.
Well, that is what.
Truckers, him,
stirred. Yeah, that is.
The avid brothers before they, you know,
down to play stadium. There was a type of music where I was like,
oh, wait.
That cold case you're listening to?
Nasty stuff. But you know what
else is a crime? Missing even a moment
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That, they do that?
Yeah, the truckers were that for me,
and I've talked about that before,
but they really were.
Like, when I was a teenager
and I first heard them,
that's exactly how I felt.
It was like,
I didn't know that this was a thing
and I'm so fucking glad.
Well, no, I mean,
that absolutely is what she meant by that.
It's like, this isn't,
I don't know what genre this is,
and I'm hearing a new genre.
She knew country,
rap,
And now she's hearing Americana or folk music or whatever,
and she didn't really know that was the thing.
And so we listened to him every night at the house.
And then I, when she started living there, I literally, we were just friends.
It was fine.
And then we started hanging out, you know, drinking, listening to Jason Isle was like,
and one night I was like, oh, fuck, I really, God damn it, I love my roommate.
This ain't going to have.
Because, you know, and I'm sorry about she stayed walking around in towels, you know,
because we're just friends.
and yada yada yada and uh then
she's gay yeah all that
all that and so yeah one time i professed my love and then you know turns out like I said
weren't it in a letter uh not I did write her a letter yes
you also somewhat less romantically
bought a big truck to impress her with
I did buy a big truck to impress her that part yeah and she laughs to this day about it
she's like I can't look at that fucking truck anymore she's like just knowing you did
that dumb shit and I was like just knowing you did that dumb shit and I
And then when you took that truck, and this isn't directly related to her, but it's just, it fits the story so well for me anyway.
When you took that truck to get it registered, the license plate that the state of Georgia gave you says big pig on it.
No, it says pig.
And that's why you started calling me big pig.
Yeah, it says pig 9,900 on the back of it.
It does.
Just really in keeping with the whole fat sad thing there.
You're like, got this kick-ass truck, go to get registered in the stuff.
And the fake Lord above is like, hold on.
them in a third buddy
keep this in check
we're going to
butt the pig
on the back
St. Peter
walked up to God in heaven
what are you going to do
they got
well it turns out
the show
thought he was going
to hit with this truck
I'm going to fuck with him
I'm going to fuck with him
very hard
and so
anyways so when that
you know
I confessed my love
and it didn't work
out
then I remember
that time after that
when we had that party
at your house
I'll not tell that
no please don't tell that story
please don't tell that story
oh dear God
don't tell that story
Honestly, there's a lot of reasons not to tell that story.
What's funny is we're all talking about different reasons we shouldn't do.
Sure.
Oh, no, I'm talking about all of them.
I'm pretty much okay.
No, no, please don't tell you.
I'm not going to.
So.
No, no, I meant for Corey.
Yeah, I dove into a bottle real hard, and Southeastern meant the world to me that album.
But another unique thing is I ended up moving to New York, had to get away from her.
I wanted to go up there.
It's hanging out with Drew.
She came up to visit me, and some of the other.
something more than free had just dropped.
We listened to that much.
She stayed with me for a week.
We listened to that motherfucker.
Every day, we was on the trains.
That's his headphones.
Most recent album.
Yeah.
And so, then I ended up moving back home,
and she later would tell me that, like,
she's like, I couldn't listen to Jason Isbell without thinking to you,
and I can't stop listening to Jason Isbel.
When I came to New York to visit you,
I realized that maybe I should have, you know,
damn it, I do have feelings for Corey.
And, again, that's all to say this.
Jason Iswell is very important.
That's why she was being mean to you.
New York.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
I know.
He told me when she came up there that, uh, you can say it.
I was done with her.
Yeah, I was.
I thought I had pills for her and I hung over this week and I knew he was lying.
I mean, I knew he believed it, but I knew he was lying.
Yeah.
Oh, I can do that.
He believed it.
Corey also is a very lucky man because of the relationship that he was in right before
this one.
Yeah.
I bring that up to say you, Drew.
Do you just go ahead and tell him the story?
So, Corey, I'm not going to say her.
name or nothing, but Corey's last ex-girlfriend
before he got together with Amber.
It wasn't a great relationship. All his friends,
including us, were aware of that.
I did not know,
though, that... So, you know, obviously
there's a lot of shit talking on both sides.
You know what I mean? It's like, you know,
she shit talked him, he shit talked her,
because it wasn't a good relationship. But what I
found out today, and
about fucking died
when I did... He almost choked on a
breakfast cassidia. Yeah.
At the Salt Lake City Airport.
I mean, I didn't know it.
Maybe you have known at some point, but her friends, that girl's group of friends, had a nickname for Corey that they exclusively referred to him as.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
They called him Ham Satan.
Because he looks like a ham and is the devil.
They held him.
He said it's okay.
Actually, too.
How did a group of people cut through you and know exactly who you are in that story?
Was one of them a gay man?
Yes.
Did he give you that name?
He made the name.
That's what.
That's what I thought.
That's what I thought.
I remember that.
That's what that was.
I didn't know that either until today.
Listen, this is probably, you know, wrong to say.
But gay men have this ability, not all of them, but a lot of them,
To just, like, see through people.
Old black ladies seem to have that, too.
That's what it is.
He just, like, he...
Well, I have assessed this man.
He is ham Satan.
Yeah, and they nailed me.
And, uh...
God damn it.
Anyways, yeah, the reason I said so casual is because I remember sharing that picture
because you about...
I was like...
No, the picture.
I mean, I remember the picture, and the picture was just a picture of a ham
that somebody has, like, photoshoped Corey's face on to.
We'll put it on the podcast.
We'll have to.
We'll have to find it.
It's on...
It's on a...
The text message.
The old textman.
I have it in my phone.
My favorite folder.
My hero.
Anyway, so we find that we'll put it up, but it's just a picture of a ham with Corey's face on it.
He sent us the picture.
I remember the picture, but I didn't either did not know, didn't catch, or was laughing too hard at the picture when you shared it to pick up on the backstory behind it.
I don't know that I even shared it.
I didn't know about the ham Satan thing.
Well, I mean shared it with us.
I know you shared it with us.
Well, no, and I told you this.
I don't, well, no, I didn't know at the time that that was the name, but one time I was downtown and one of her friends who I didn't realize that they were friends.
This is funny.
This is funny.
I got recognized in Chattanooga, which is where I live.
This girl comes up to me and she goes, oh my God, I know you.
And I go, yeah, I'm at the comedy catch all the time.
She goes, no, you're ham Satan.
Was that how you found out about the name in the first time?
Yes.
Because I was like, what the fuck are you talking about?
And then she told me, and I was like, I remember that picture.
She's like, yeah, we all called you Ham Satan.
We still call you Ham Satan.
I was like, I just texted you to the picture.
Oh, God.
Yeah. Oh, it's better than I remember.
That is definitely going to be the picture that we put up for this.
Ham Satan gets married.
That's a great episode.
Mr. It's Ham Satan.
So, anyways, well, the point of the story before we derailed is when I found out that you...
You reliled the shit.
Oh, yeah.
Well, when I found out that you were opening for Isbel, literally the...
first thought in my mind, especially when the date
came up, because this was me and Amber
You're going to play on ham salad?
It has to be. No, no, no,
don't ever apologize for going to
ham salad. When I found
that, it was like basically a year of the date
and me and Amber started dating anyways,
and I was like, well, I've been
wanting to propose to her in the spring
anyways. This is fucking perfect.
And so that was always going to be the thing.
It's like, yeah, I flew to Vegas specifically
to get engaged, and I think she
was surprised.
Do you want to talk about how it went or whatever?
Yeah, I mean, it went well.
And, okay, I wasn't, because we got snowed the fuck in in New York, I was supposed to go home and my plan was, A, get the ring, you know, B, talked to her daddy, which I hadn't done yet.
I'd talked to her mom, but her dad, he works a shit ton to, and I'm gone all the time.
So I ended up having to call him in Vegas from a casino and just like, hey, I know this isn't the best thing to do, but I just want to let you know, I'm going to ask him.
Amber to marry me tonight. He goes, oh, hell yeah,
congrats. Anyways, I'm going to track me. I'll see you later.
And that's just he's a cool dude.
But no, it went. So what I had to do was, because I didn't have time to run home and get
the ring, and I didn't want Amber to be able to see it. I didn't want to be in a bag or
whatever. So I called my sister, and I said, hey, tell, I said, wrap the ring up in a box,
like a bigger box that looks like a present and give it, tell Amber, and this will check out
if you know my dad, because my dad's very eccentric type, weird, goobry type dude.
Tell her, my dad got me a gift that he wants to.
wanted me to open right before we went into Isbel because he knows I'll appreciate it.
My dad be doing shit like that all the time.
It didn't even phase.
Amber goes, God, you and your dad are so a lot.
He's such a goddamn gober.
And I was like, I know.
So I just hold on to it.
Like, I don't know what this could be.
It's probably some shit.
It's probably some guitar pick.
He wants me to get signed or something.
She's like, yeah, we'd check out.
So right before we're leaving the hotel to go to the show, because I wanted there to be
some kind of a surprise.
We're walking out.
She's like, hey, you've got to open that thing for your dad.
And I was like, oh, yeah, shit.
And so I opened it.
And inside was the ring.
And I said, hey, will you marry me?
And I forgot to get down.
I had all these things I wanted to say, and I wanted to get down the knee.
And I ended up just going, uh-huh.
Will you marry me?
And she's like, yes, you dummy.
And then we, you know, porked.
I'm kidding.
We just kissed him.
I'm saying.
And then after the show, you, y'all both met.
We met.
He took a picture with y'all.
He did.
And what was pointing at the ring and shit.
But it was really cool, though.
It was great, too, because you and him instead of, you always look closer in photos because your head so big.
And since he also used to be.
a drunk. It just looks like Amber's far further away. Yeah, it does. It does. There's a picture,
and I wanted to show him the picture of me and him had to be with each other like two years ago,
and I do look better than I did then. I mean, I'm still very much a drunk, but I guess I'm not eating as much gravy or some shit.
Like, I do look better. But what was really cool is, and I know you had, you have the will to live.
That's what it is. That's what it is. The will to light in your eyes.
That's true. When we went back there, man, instead of them just being yellow.
Right. Jimbo, Jimbo Hart, Chad Gamble, Dary De Boraha, all the dudes in the band when I walked back.
Except for Sadler, who was already gone.
Right.
The rest of them were back there.
They all were just like, dude, congrats.
That's awesome.
That means.
Which I know you preempted that, but it was, dude.
And then I look and there's Jesus himself, Jason Isbell.
And he's like, hey, man, congrats.
That was awesome.
He's got that perfect Alabama just, you know, it's so great.
And then he's like, that's awesome.
Congratulations.
And Amber is fan girl and harder than I've ever seen her.
Like, she's like, he goes.
He goes, you know, really, that's awesome.
You know, you guys are going to make a great couple.
That's awesome.
And she just goes, me and your wife had the same birthday.
She did say that.
She's infatuated with them.
But it was great.
It was the perfect night.
And afterwards, Amber, like, she don't tear up, but she got as close as she could get.
And she was just like, this was the most perfect thing.
You did everything perfect.
And she's like, on the way where she's like, we got to get that picture blown up.
That's going in our room.
I finally did something right.
This part isn't romantic,
but I want you to include it in the story
of what happened right after that in the casino.
Literally right after that.
Okay, first of all, we walked out the door of the House of Blooms
and didn't go 20 fucking feet.
We didn't.
Let me tell you, but let me...
I had just left when they met Isbel.
I saw a proposal, hugged him, congratulations,
let's just sell up my week to this point
so that this is like, okay, we don't view.
National television's great.
We did the view national television.
Yeah.
Man, it's been a hell of a way.
It's been a hell of a way.
All the dudes who kept commenting on our stairs.
Yeah, right.
Then I got to see my, I got to go to Vegas and, you know, head and see, and my best friend Chris was here.
I got to propose to my girlfriend.
I got to see one of my best friends opened up for Jason Iswell.
Got to meet Jason Iswell.
Got to be a fiancé for the first time.
And then I immediately took a roulette table for $800, God damn dollars.
He sat down with $20.
put it in with 800.
He hit his exact number two or three times.
Three times.
Three times.
He hit like a $2 bet on the fucking one.
He put it on and won like $250.
And Amber goes, we got to $800.
And Tray's back there, of course, he goes,
Chow's on one.
You all to hit her, baby.
And Amber's like, $800 is fine, Corey.
Please leave.
And I was, and I was like, fiercely disappointed.
But when she said, I was like, she's right.
I'll be so happy with this $800 that I ended up losing.
on blackjack
not all of it
I still am
technically I took Vegas
for 200
but you know
that was well worth it
but yeah man
I was like
I couldn't fucking lose
that night
I was having a
one hell of a night
you were on fire
yeah it was great
and that was
that's still my favorite
part
the roulette part
because you can't get that
that's you know
the other stuff
you know people
you can you know
meet as well get a picture
roulette baby
that's just
that's once in a lifetime
hit that type of heater
man
I've seen you do it twice
in the past six
Well, you're right.
I hit it, Ruehler.
I'm good at it.
I am somehow.
It's a show game.
She's a show game.
Yeah.
Jolette.
It is.
Okay.
Well, I told my pace.
Yeah.
I've been over here getting live texts for my friends who were still in Buffalo doing the March Madness thing.
And they went to the games today, and they are all lost.
And it is hilarious.
There's a group text message thread of apparently just 33-year-old men and Bib overalls.
They're brightly colored walking around that arena and Buffalo drunk lost.
Well, since you brought up basketball, and I know nobody, no one will give a fuck about this,
but I'm going to give the kid a shout out anyway.
Shout out to Tyree Kee, who is a Salina boy.
He's from the same hometown as me.
He's in high school right now.
He has led my Salina Bulldogs.
Well, Clay County now.
Clay County Bulldogs to the state championship game.
I see the new segment coming up.
hometown hitters.
Well, buddy, it's going to be a brief and short segment.
But anyway, who's room to win right now?
Mine.
You've got a better fucking shower than I do.
It's.
Anyway.
Anyway, this is the hometown hitters.
He's a boy.
He's the new segment?
Hell yeah.
So I'm the only one from mine, so that's over.
He's a guard.
He's a guard.
He averaged, he won Mr. Basketball in the state of Tennessee.
He averaged 38 points of game this season.
He broke the Tennessee.
state tournament record for scoring in the first round.
He scored 58 points in the first round.
Wow.
In the second round, he had 36 points, 10 rebounds, 6 assists, something like that.
He's a fucking baller.
He's going to Indiana State.
But anyway, I just wanted to say, since you brought up basketball.
The Bulldog, actually, I mean, I think it's either today or tomorrow, they're in the championship.
Oh, not.
Yeah, they're in the championship.
championship game.
Well, I've been waiting to see you.
That all happened since you left.
Right.
And I knew he, you know, I mean, I did tell him, but I knew he wouldn't give a shit,
but since you're a basketball guy.
My buddy Thompson.
All that hit for me.
My buddy Thompson, who we've talked about before, old Dusty Bear, we were texting about it
on our Salina group text about Tyreek and the boys' team and everything.
And Thompson was like, Trey, you should do something with him, man.
I get some of this sliny boy.
you know, hitting nationwide or something like that.
And I was like, I said, no, buddy, we'll keep him pure.
I hate to ruin his fucking image.
You know what I mean?
Like any sane coach on earth would tell him to stay the fuck away from me.
You know, because sports and all this don't mix.
So I'm just going to follow him from afar and hope he continues to kick ass.
Well, I mean, we should go to a game, though.
So go dogs.
Yeah.
I mean, dude, I mean, if he, they're playing somebody, when he gets to college,
they're playing somebody, we're around there or whatever.
Yeah, we'll say so much.
I'd love to do that.
Be sweet.
Go sycamores.
Yeah, I'll transition.
So, yeah, but anyway, I just want to get that out there.
But shifting gears, let's do what we do and talk about what's going on.
I'm going to be, I'm going to say up front.
I'm a little removed.
Yeah, I was going to say, I'm going to say up front.
I've had such a wild-ass, insane and surreal week.
for all the reasons we already mentioned
but I you know
I'm so I'm aware
at a surface level of some shit
that's been going on like the stuff with Merkel
and all that or whatever but I'm
I'm a little out of touch right now
I very much allowed myself to not
give a friday this weekend which I know
you know as hell technically being
a Southern white man I could just do that all the time
but yeah I didn't read
a goddamn thing except for text messages that were
congratulating me on getting engaged that's about fucking it
So, Drew, you might have to just teach us stuff.
Well, I mean...
Which I know you love doing.
As per the usual, any sort of pile of political talk in the United States right now circles back to the, you know, the black hole that is trained.
He's like a fucking black hole.
You know, it's like everything bends towards Trump.
Light can't escape from him and, you know, my nephew doesn't believe he's real.
But I think the main thing to talk about this week is probably...
I don't know if this is the most attention-grabbing thing, but this is to me the wildest.
Just in terms of where we're at and what's going on.
At the G20 summit, Trump has made a lot of waves.
We're basically breaking with economic policies with our allies.
His protectionism and his idea of putting America first, which, to be fair,
is a lot of what we've told the world.
That's why a lot of people voted for him.
You know what I mean, you all just assume it's just the racism, which, as you said, Tray, that was the ice.
No, xenophobia is also huge.
Yeah.
Well, he has put that into the trade world because I do feel like Republicans for years have preached xenophobia
while practicing, at least in business, and the Democrats too, of course, you know, don't put American worker interests first.
Let's put America generally in America's business interests first, which means sending jobs abroad.
Yes, right.
His protectionism has now really openly clashed at the G20 summit with a lot of our allies.
and that's interesting to say the least.
He said some wild shit like Germany owes us money for NATO protection,
which, I mean, you can understand.
It's not literally true.
Like there's no contract or anything where you're like,
oh, yeah, they just ain't paying.
But you can understand his or other people's logic when they've talked about
how Germany, just as an example, gets all the protections of being a NATO country,
but they don't have an army.
Now, there's a very specific reason for that.
Yeah, we all, as a world said, y'all,
get to have an army no more armies for y'all i mean it might be time for them to you know what i mean
they hit too hard with the army well it is like there's a part of me that wonders and i'm not
you know shitting on merkel but there's a part of me that wonders if like this whole putin thing
it's like markels i just feel like she's so super smart and she's got that weird haircut that makes
me think she's behind it all you know what i mean like she's really who's anyway again
that's not a big headline grabber it's not like right for like oh look he's a big idiot
but just in terms of what we're dealing with and how major it is that's a big deal if we're
We stop agreeing with the economic policies of,
if we stop working with as business partners, countries like Germany,
or we change the way that we do, it'll be a big deal.
Yeah, without a doubt.
What about the budget?
His budget, I saw some shows.
It's absolutely unreal.
Cut the endowment of the arts down.
That costs, I think, 148 million a year.
I'm sure the numbers are wrong.
Somebody will tell me.
which is less than it costs to keep Melania and Barron in New York for a year.
He cut a big program in my area where I'm from in Appalachia.
That part of it was like cutting Mills on Wheels.
Yes.
Mills on Wheels is a program that has a lot of government funding where literally it's that.
And also they do a lot for the elderly too.
And it's not just poor people.
We had my grandmother, my mom travels a lot and I was a comedian.
It's actually mostly elderly.
It is a lot of old people.
And there was a lot in my building in Forest Hills.
There was a lot of meals on wheels.
I used to meet the lady and she'd give me left-offers and shit.
Now, I'm wondering if...
Well, you know how I feel about if you fuck with old people shit.
Yeah, it was like a service, but it was...
Based on your income.
Yeah, but it was like subsidized or whatever.
Right.
Yeah, and so...
But my thing, my thing is like, I mean, obviously I feel that way about poor people, too.
And anybody in general that needs help.
But, like, you know my personal connection to old people.
And that shit don't fly with me.
Cutting something like that, that is not.
a goddamn who's the old fucking welfare like what his new well we can't have pbs and we can't have
fucking old people have an insurer delivered to their fucking house well a lot of people think
that meals on wheels specifically will end up costing us more even because of like if you
because it is mostly old people when you take that away from old people and then they end up like
dead we got to do something with a body don't have like i mean they can't live and they're they
can't live where they live anymore you know what i mean because they're
so they have to go in a home, right?
And it's like...
And if those people couldn't afford...
And they could barely afford meals on wheels,
they damn sure can't afford a nice home.
Like, meals on wheels is a big thing,
apparently, that allows old people in that situation,
but who are still, like, in their house.
That's a big reason that they're able to stay in their house.
But don't abort them.
Because they get that, you know.
So, anyway, you know, it could end up...
Like, even if you're just a totally cold, like, you know,
completely, like,
Like, no, fuck it.
We need to say money.
Fuck it.
Like, even that argument might not work because a lot of people think it'll end up actually costing money anyway.
So it's just like shitty all around.
You can just let the people die, Trey.
Don't bring them home.
Let old people die.
Don't abort your babies.
We want to watch them grow up and die.
Yeah.
And be old.
I have to hate everything.
The biggest cut.
Honestly, though, and fuck both of those moves to death.
Those are ones are getting a lot of, you know,
getting talked about a lot and for good reason
because they are like kind of the shittiest
but they're also like fractions of
the overall cuts the biggest cuts are to the EPA
and to like the State Department which is like
foreign aid the only country that isn't getting the foreign aid
touched at all is real
yeah yeah exactly
yeah right and then you know
and cuts across the board
pretty much except for
fucking defense and
Homeland Security which for the goddamn
wall and defense like
25 billion for the wall
yeah I have a hundred dollar bet with my brother-in-law that he won't get
half of it done in the first uh two or four years
either way buddy I've been I've been harping on that
fucking since it but I
promised him that I'm when he gives it to me I'm going to donate it to
Planned Parenthood in his name so that's the only
that's awesome that I have in this whole thing but the EPA
thing man it's actually hard for me to talk about and like be funny
right it's yeah the stakes are too high
Well, there's two sides of it for me.
It's like the stakes are super high because this planet really is heating up.
We really are in fucking trouble.
We're in Oklahoma right now.
It's 7 degrees.
The guy who come pick this up, the promoter, Brad was telling me on the way over here that it was 98 last week.
But then three days before it was 98, it snowed or maybe vice versa.
Well, that's what it went.
I mean, before I left Chickamauga, that's kind of how it was.
And I know that any gold evidence is not scientific proof.
But I also fucking know that 98% of the world's scientists who have studied this agreed that it's
real and that we are, you know, causing it with carbon monoxide.
However, Scott Pruitt, the new head of the EPA wants to dismantle it.
And it's just, it's really, it's truly disgusting.
And I don't mean that like, oh, our side laws, so I'm going to throw words around like
disgusting and Hitler and all that.
No, it's truly disgusting that people will put money and their own personal gain
and business interests over science.
And listen, I believe that Scott Pruitt doesn't believe in climate change.
Sure. I do too.
I just know that he already had interest in the oil business coming out of this.
He's from Oklahoma.
Yeah.
That's where we're...
I don't understand that.
Those same motherfuckers are like, you know, I heard people like,
Global Warman's a conspiracy because, you know, they're trying to turn everything green
because the Prius has made money and this big Prius that's fucking line up.
Because like, oh, yeah, there's...
Like the Prius lobby is somehow affected the conversation, but they won't entertain the notion that the oil...
Right.
That's what I'm saying.
I'm like, they're not even in the same fucking ballpark.
All these people that are like, that big solar can't touch big oil.
But, you know, Prius is out.
Yeah, but they would never go to a sport.
But they entertain.
They entertain the fact that fucking climate change is a conspiracy to fucking pad liberals' pockets.
But big oil has, no, they're just good people and it's totally fine to be.
Good fucking, Jesus, God.
I don't understand who the fuck.
Hey, let's make it.
Let's make this conspiracy to where it ain't real, by the way.
but everyone will start treating the planet better.
Those are some real evil people.
Jesus.
Well, on the positive side, though, they are not really reducing the budget, like, you know,
one percent or something like that, but they're not really reducing the budget for NASA.
So hopefully, you know, when this planet does die, we will be.
able to leave.
We'll go through that headers line and we'll be the first to get on the moon.
Yeah.
Sincerely, though, I mean, that really does make me happy that they're not fucking with NASA too much.
But it's not enough to make up for all the rest of the bullshit.
NASA does a great job convincing politicians on both sides of the island.
I think this is fair that they're needed for defense.
Sure.
And that makes sense.
You know, if you figure out of a satellite space, that changed the end in terms of war.
No, well, that Republicans trying to live in space, too.
Oh, yeah.
You know, like, we got so much other shit from the space race,
not even just, you know, applied in the world of, like, defense.
You know what I mean?
But in, like, you know, like, fucking Velcro and shit.
It's worth it.
Like, all kinds of IT stuff and whatever else.
The EPA was Earth Day, which is, like, yeah.
You remember the video that monkey?
I'm not trying to make it about the comparison between the two.
I'm just saying that NASA is great.
I was just trying to.
What they put that monkey up in?
The monkey wasn't in Sputnik.
It was a person, right?
Sputnik was the first
That was just a satellite
There wasn't nobody in that
Right
That was the first thing
To just get launched
Uri Gagorgon or whatever
It's the first dude in space
But they shot a monkey up
Remember that when they shot that monkey up?
Yeah they did dogs and all kinds of shit
Yeah well see
NASA's worth it just for that
Footage of a monkey going in space
That hits
Yeah
I mean I'm not going to argue with that
Yeah, that's checkmate Trump
There was a fucker
Did y'all ever watch?
I god this is going to torture me now
Did you ever watch a movie
and when you were in school about those fucking monkeys,
like space monkeys,
and they escape.
That's why I'm thinking about it.
They like escape from the space thing,
like some kids that help these monkeys escape that are in like a...
Kids busted the monkeys out of jail?
Something like that.
You know what I'm talking about?
Yeah, I do know it.
I think that's why I'm thinking about it.
NASA has big areas all over the country,
but the two biggest ones are in Houston and in Alabama.
Please tell me that it was redneck kids
that busted these monkeys out.
Was it Huntsville?
I can't...
I can't remember.
I remember, dude, I can bet.
But they needed...
Breathe the monkeys!
No, they needed extra for a touch football game.
They're like, that works.
I guarantee you that monkey's a hell of a tight end.
Bring his ass over.
It's so hip.
I was in...
So when we got done with our show in Salt Lake City last week,
I drove to Billings, Montana just because I'd never been to that part of country.
I wanted to, like, drive through the Yellowstone and stuff.
How beautiful.
It was awesome.
Unreal.
I got hammered with these construction workers at a bar, because that's what I do.
And, you know, they're Trump guys.
and like all Trump guys,
they wanted to have sex with me by the end of the night.
It's so weird how I have it.
It's so weird.
Yeah.
Like a friendly Trump supporter,
a friendly one,
not a hateful one.
Like,
if I talk to them and engage them,
they can't,
by the end of that,
man,
you just not like most of them.
I'm just like,
you keep touching me when you say that.
I don't know what's going on here,
buddy,
but I'll meet you in the bathroom in front of the right price.
Yeah,
there's a lot of repression with some of those dudes.
And I bring it out in them.
Anyway,
uh,
they were there doing construction on a,
like a big,
ski resort right outside of the park, but they were about to start a job inside the park.
Now, to be fair, to Trump and the Republicans, this has been going on for a long time, including
during and among the Democrats.
Did you know that even though national parks are federal land, they often and frequently
give up plots of it in 99-year or 200-year leases, depending on the state, how long they can do it,
and then they'll put like a gigantic, fucking gargantuan resort in there that I did know that.
It might have to be lead certified, but it ain't good for the goddamn bears.
I did know that, but I didn't know how deep it went.
Like, I just knew that that was a thing.
Well, the reason I brought it up, like, there's so many issues, and I said with the EPA,
like, on the scared, logical side, it's like, the earth dying.
It's dying.
You fucking idiots.
But then just on, like, the, I'm a liberal snowflake side,
man, parks are purdy.
Parks are purty.
And, like, they're trying to, like, dig for oil in the Great Alaskan wilderness and shit.
Fuck that.
It's also just like one of the last truly free, awesome things that you could do.
Like something that's like you can just go to a park, not spend a fucking dime and have...
It's not free.
Don't you see what it's costing us?
Nothing is free.
It's costing us in our liberty because we're too relying on the Middle East.
Give me a fucking break.
Yeah, you're right.
Nothing is free.
Well, there's arguments out there that makes sense to me where they're like, well, if we weren't relying on the Middle East oil, things could be different in that region.
And I'm like, okay, but we keep digging here.
We keep doing new laws.
We keep fracking.
We keep doing alternative things like natural gas.
Yet we still keep giving Israel all the goddamn money because we stay in the Middle East.
Like, they're not serious about it.
They use the Middle East as an excuse for why we need to dig oil if they want money.
You know what I mean?
And that is real thing is just to fucking ploy to keep the Bible on their side for the fucking base.
That's all that is.
No, I'm saying.
But they, what I'm saying, I know, I know it.
No, no, you're right.
I think it's 100% oil.
Yeah, it's 100% oil, but they can turn it and just be like, no, we have to protect Israel.
It says never turn your back on Israel.
Only the antichrist would turn us back on Israel.
It's not 100% oil.
They make weapons and shit.
It's a bunch of defense stuff, too.
Yeah, but either way, it's easy for the, it's easy for those.
Now, the base, they don't get a fuck about those things.
They don't because they just go, yeah, no, we're supposed to do that.
That's Israel.
We literally could call war on us, and there's so many people to be like,
this we have to protect Israel at no
those people exist I see
them every day I think that it's
like however overt they'll be
about it or not
I mean I agree with you but I think it's more about
like the fact that Israel
is naturally aligned as an enemy
to all the god damn
Muslims over there trust me
well that's why that's easy for them
they're the good guys they must have to be
they're the white people of over there
right that plays into the old thing too
because, you know, the Saudis got all the goddamn oil,
and I think the feeling is if we don't, and this might be true,
it certainly would be different.
If we didn't have such a huge ally in Israel there,
the Middle East would be different to say it's easy.
Yeah, yeah.
But I'm just saying that, using that as an excuse,
acting like you want to get rid of that,
pretending, giving credence to the notion,
well, we don't want to be so involved in the Middle East.
We just have to be because of all these reasons,
but we could get rid of one of them if we did for oil
in our national parks.
Again, it's not as important
as the planet
literally melting
in front of our eyes,
but it makes me sad.
Yeah, without a down.
Don't hit.
No, it's don't.
You're right.
We end it on a bummer like that?
No, I was going to say,
we do need to wrap it up,
but I don't want to end on that bummer either,
so what else are we going to talk about?
Well, you're the one that saw some of the news.
No, I'll say something that hits.
Oh, yeah, something.
We can go back to Vegas.
We did some other hit and stuff.
I just mostly slept and lost money when I wasn't with you guys.
Dad, buddy, I'm telling.
I know, dude.
I'm literally in a perpetual state.
In this past week and I have, I mean, we've been traveling for like, you know, eight, nine months.
You know, how much the view is.
Oh, yeah, that did hit.
I stay worn out with this past week in particular.
I've been, I've been.
There's no reason for us not to tell the goddamn story.
Well, I've been sitting over here.
I've been sitting over here thinking about it for a minute about whether or not we should do that.
Uh, I wouldn't.
Well, we spent $800 on a goddamn bar tab, much to our publisher's chagrin.
Yeah.
We'll leave it at that.
That redneck's got red in New York City.
Yeah.
And so what we were saying, we really need you to pick up a copy of that book.
The liberal Redneck Manifesto, Dragon Dixie out of the dark.
It is the number one bestseller in religious humor, American literacy, and criticism,
and political humor on Amazon.com right now.
Pick up your copy.
We'd really fucking appreciate it.
I know that if you go on Amazon,
it said that they were out of stock,
but we are rectifying that,
and there are other retailers out there.
You don't imagine the people.
You also can just still order it,
and when they get it back in, you know, they'll get it.
And also, I just saw the day some phone yours,
it's in some libraries in Canada now.
Yeah.
That's super cool.
My buddy's, the dude who posted that,
his wife works in the publishing industry.
She's an editor.
She talked about how much we're hit.
She has never said that.
me now.
Yeah, I don't help.
Yeah.
The view, the view was fantastic.
Yes, it went very well.
We didn't know we were on it or didn't see it or whatever.
It's on YouTube, right?
You can YouTube the clip.
Yeah.
And the only thing that sucked about it was,
Whoopi Goldberg was the one who wanted us on there in the first place.
She somehow got a hold of the book.
She read it.
She really liked it a lot.
She was like, we've got to have these guys on the show that made it happen.
But then, as we've sort of alluded to a couple times already,
there was a goddamn blizzard literally the day of the power of parents.
That's why we got drunk.
Everybody gets drunk in a blizzard.
You can't not get drunk in a blizzard.
We couldn't leave our hotels.
So Whoopi didn't, wasn't able to make it because of the weather.
And that part sucks.
But literally everything else about it was, I mean, awesome.
All the ladies, the hosts were all fantastic.
And everybody that works there was awesome.
And that show, that show's been on 20 years, which blew out of our minds.
And looking back, I'm like, no, that makes sense.
I remember watching as a kid with mom.
But, dude, like, you can tell.
Like, that thing is a well-oil machine.
People keep asking, they're like, you know, normally you guys are fucking,
you talk over each other and you do-da-da-da.
It's like, man, they had everything set up so perfect.
Everything was great.
That Carly, who was the, I don't even know what the producer.
The producer in there.
They're just great people.
The staff was all fantastic.
Oh, and one of my boys.
He's Toby
worked there,
which I didn't know.
I hadn't seen him
since we were like
Taylor's together
and he was losing
his goddamn mind
because he's one of those
like cool hip artist
types who's only on
Instagram,
not Facebook.
He had no idea
that we were doing that
well like he knew
we'd been on the
Oh,
he didn't know
he was on the show?
No.
That's awesome.
And so like I'm up there
he's like
Like until you walked out?
When I walked out
he lost his fucking
mind.
He started taking pictures.
Yeah,
now that makes that a lot cooler.
He was getting like dirty looks
from his bosses
because he was definitely
supposed to be doing something.
Oh,
Well, of course, of course, but that makes that a lot cool.
We were caterers together.
That's the other thing that's cool.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
You're both doing something way better.
We care.
We're both in a way better place.
Yeah, that is, that's a great feeling.
But no, the whole thing was great.
My mom got to come, which was cool.
My Aunt Beth was there.
I got to give him a shout out on national TV that made my mom's life because also you
could hear.
I said shout out to my mom.
She's sitting right there.
And then Joy Behar turned around and goes, ooh, you've got a very pretty mother.
And Chickamauga was on.
fire on that. Oh my God.
Nobody gave a shit about what I had to say.
They were like, Joy Behar called Laura Forster Pretty.
We all knew you are, girl. You go, girl.
Your son's going to hell. You go, girl.
And so's joy.
But it was nice that she complimented you.
Even the devil recognizes beauty.
No, and that was great too. We get asked this a lot.
You're a ham Satan. Is she kosher Satan?
My mom.
Or Joy Joy.
Yeah.
That's hilarious.
We get asked this a lot when we're in QAW.
and a like, you know, what's it like for you guys going home?
You know, how do people treat you and stuff like that?
And we all says, you know, like our boys are our boys.
You know, that's just how it is.
I got an overwhelming amount of people.
And I'll be straight to honestly what they said.
Most of them were like, I literally watched the view for the first time because of you.
I don't agree with any of that bullshit, but I'm so proud of you.
I saw, I had people comment like, we loved your segment.
Turned it off for the rest because they're the devil.
But no, you know, whatever.
So it was great.
It was a lot of people in my hometown who sincerely...
liberals are doing that too, though, and they're like too good for it.
Right.
Almost everyone who's not.
But like, 40% of the posts had to mention that they didn't watch it.
Yeah, which I'm like, well...
I'm worried they were going to be judged for what you do.
Yeah, and I'm like, well, that's weird because fucking a lot of people do.
I, you know, shit.
Turns out.
Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely.
A lot of people.
Yeah, which, you know, I don't, but I literally...
I don't watch any...
Any unexpected Facebook or Twitter, you know, whatever from that?
Yeah, oh, a lot.
I have a few preachers who are about my age.
They shared it, you know, talk about how proud of me they are and stuff.
Dude, you have not talked to me in years.
No, I got that.
I did get that from several people.
It's cool because I think they're generally proud.
They were.
I know they were.
They wouldn't have taken, these people wouldn't have taken the time to reach out to me.
It was a lot of people I hadn't talked to in a long time.
Hey, man.
A lot of people sent my mom.
That was the coolest thing, too.
My mom and my dad got a shit ton.
that people that don't know me, they know them
and they know that I'm their son.
And they were like, hey, you know, obviously, you know,
we are who we are and we have different values than Corey.
And I know that y'all have different values than Corey,
but we can tell by watching that that you, you know,
raised an exceptional young man.
And also, you know what?
A lot of people commented to me, they go,
you know, y'all weren't really as insufferable liberals
as I thought you were going to be.
I was like, I know I don't think that what we were talking about
was disagreeable on many on that.
know I did get a lot of flack on Twitter for what I said about pride.
Yeah, you did.
But you also got cut off.
Whatever, whether I did or not.
What I said was that, you know, Democrats left these people behind.
They've got a platform that's being rejected by people from where we're from and from other Rust Belt type areas.
And that platform seems to be, in their mind, it's here, we're going to give you health care and we're going to give you whatever you need.
and they're saying what I won as a job because they're proud.
And I got a lot of flack of like, yeah, yeah, it's pride, you're right,
white pride, and just stuff like that.
And I'm like, that's what your people, this woman we kept putting your people in quote.
And I don't remember her name.
We had a really, actually really good, as far as Twitter goes, the exchange was fine.
We were both civil and she was nice.
But I'm just, it's interesting to me that I'm still having to say that, not still having to,
but like that people get shocked that I feel this way.
But I'll say it until I'm blue in the face.
and if it means every liberal outside of the South rejects me forever, that's fine with me.
If you think that everyone in Pennsylvania, everyone in Michigan,
in these counties that went for Obama last time that voted for Trump is a racist,
and that's why they did it, you're full of shit.
You are full of shit.
Now, for a lot of them, they didn't mind it and they liked it in some regard.
And then, of course, they overlooked it.
Yes, you can totally say, fuck you for overlooking what he said about me if I'm like Muslim or black or whatever.
Mexican. But you can't sit there and say, I know who you are and I know why you voted for this guy.
Because what I was getting flat for is, these people, a few people were like, that's not really what the Democrats platform is and blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, look, you may be right. It might be ignorance on the part of voters. But if you're a party, your job is to convince people of what your policies are.
Yeah.
If people in working class towns believe you're the party of handouts.
Right.
Even if it's not true, you're the reason they believe that.
If you blame them, you're an asshole.
You're assuming that they're stupid.
Dude, we talked about this exact thing with Sarah.
It's like, either way, either way it's a failure on the Democrats part.
Like, that's not, that doesn't excuse any of it to be like, well, no, but it is in their interest or whatever.
You know, it's like, well, that, okay, but you did not convince them of that, so you still fucked up.
And pointing out that Republicans are cheating in the way that they're getting them there
and pointing out that they're weak-minded because they buy into what the Republicans are doing,
you know, while you're patting yourself on the back, you know,
you're going to do that as you walk to the fucking prison camp that Donald Trump, you know,
built for you or whatever.
Like, I mean, that's probably extreme.
Knock on wood.
But my point is, that's just an excuse.
You're a, like, basically you're a salesman if you're part of a Democratic Party.
Not individuals as Democrats, but the party itself.
You're selling a product.
You want to be in there.
We're the best for the country.
You failed to prove that to people.
Yes, exactly.
It's easier to be like, no, they're just dumb and stupid because they don't wear shoes and their rednecks and they work in overall.
I'll say this, and this is not going to be a popular opinion, but, yes, there absolutely is a lot of racist that has a lot to play.
But some people down there, hell in Ohio, whatever, they sincerely,
when they said, oh, white privilege ain't a thing
and, you know, racism really ain't that bad.
They believe it because they just, they don't see it every day
and they're not sure.
It is fair to hold people to a standard of like listening to other people.
No, I agree with that.
They have no empathy.
I mean, it's always bothered me with a black-wide-matter thing
when people are like, these black people go and they say this
and I don't believe it.
And it's like, why?
Why do they think they're lying all that?
Yeah, they won't go to work, but they'll all assemble for a fucking meeting.
Right.
You know, that seems like a lot of work.
Right.
So, you know, it goes both ways, and you can't expect working anybody to, you know, listen to other people, but you've got to listen to them, too.
Nothing about that, though, is...
And I don't think that's right, by the way.
I'm just saying I genuinely believe that.
They don't believe it in their hearts.
It's just what frustrates me, and we talked about this with Sarah a little bit, too.
She brought up the point that the blame keeps being laid at the feet of the working class, because they did go overwhelmingly for Trump, and that was a big part of this election cycle.
But, like, if you want to talk about racism, what about...
the rich white people who voted for Trump.
Yeah. All white people.
Yeah, what's their thing?
Why is it that working class and especially,
why is it that I go on TV with this accent
and defend, quote, my people,
and it's like, your people are the white pride people.
I know about the KKK.
I'm not stupid. I'm no longer a Southern apologist.
Like me and I have talked about that before I had to let go of that.
I get it.
But like how come we don't talk about how all groups of white people,
especially the rich white ones,
they get the most to gain from the racism.
of the world.
No, the whole thing you started this out by talking about when you were saying, like,
if you think, if you really think that everybody in these places is, you know,
it's just the racism and the xenophobia and all that.
Like, that's what it is that's primarily motivating them.
Then, you know, you're full of shit or whatever.
It's not even, to me, it's not even, it doesn't even make sense, like, logically.
Like, if you just really sit and think about it, like, to think,
that, but that's the whole
rub is that though these people, a lot of these liberals
they just don't, they don't know any of these people, they don't
know anything about them, but like, we all do.
And if you, to actually
believe that people who's like
entire, you know, way of life and everything
has eroded to nothingness
before their eyes over the past couple of decades
or whatever, and now they have this
asshole promising them relief from that,
to honestly believe
that that is all
less important to them
than, oh, fuck brown people,
they're gross, you know, like that that's more important to these people than their entire way of life.
They're looking out of their dilapidated city. It doesn't even make sense. Like, seriously, no, that doesn't make them not assholes.
Well, one point in the late... It's like a pick in your battle thing. They're like, well, you know what? I'm gonna, I want my car back.
Well, one point that was brought up, though, is that they have bought into the Republicans have done an amazing job of connecting those two things.
Right. Blaming the dilapidated life and cities and lack of job on.
people connecting the racism to the loss of jobs.
And look, that's real.
That's there.
It happens with Americans with xenophobia who aren't white.
You know, black and brown working class people don't want immigrants getting their jobs.
No, no, no, no, no.
That is there.
I'll give them that.
Because my intention was never to say that's not real.
I know.
But that's what I get treated like.
I know.
It happens to me all the fucking time.
I'm always feeling like I'm having to point out like, look,
I've never said that that
kind of shit isn't real or isn't
a thing. All I've ever said is
it's a false flag.
It's a false flag. It doesn't reflect
everybody.
Well, while you're
for the most important thing.
Right. And while you're sitting here focused
on this shit, you're just getting
dusted. Right. You can, we need to
focus on that stuff, but you need to kind of
be in office first.
Yeah. All right, well, so hope you
learn something liberals. God damn it.
We got to go do a show.
see y'all next time.
Uh, skee.
Well, well.
