wellRED podcast - End Of An Era: The Last WellRED Podcast….For Now!

Episode Date: September 30, 2026

Corey here. There are no words to describe how much it means to us that you’ve been with us on this near decade long run   Please know that this isn’t goodbye, it’s just see ya later!   I could sit here and write 30,000 words and it still wouldn’t be enough, but hell, it’s not like we are disappearing!   Please go to TraeCrowder.com and grab tickets to see us in Nashville this Christmas and Trae in a city near you!   Go to CoreyWritesForYou.com to read all my written work and listen to bonus podcasts and videos… it’s all FREE! (Though you can pay if you so choose)   Holler at DrewMorganComedy.com to keep up with Drew Drop   Please listen to our sister podcasts: Puttin On Airs, Gravy Baby, Weekly Skews, and The Dollop: Hollywood Hellscapes…..   …… and be on the lookout cause all three of us are working on new podcasts as we speak!   Love yall. See ya out there!   - CHO

Well, here we are. One last time, everybody. Well read, Cho and Drew both here. Here looks like a wise old fox. Mm-hmm. From a cartoon, sort of got a splinter thing going on, but not a rap, more like a fox. Yeah, it's all the woods and stuff behind him. Yeah, that's definitely.

Like he's from like Appalachian Kung Fu Panda. Yeah, he does. I like that. Kung Fu raccoon. Yeah. Yeah. It looks like an old dog. Although I think a raccoon is just like an evolutionarily old dog.

It's like a dog and a cat fucked. You know, I'm trying to think of who you would be. What's funny is, wait, what is Dustin Hoffman? Dustin Hoffman's character in Kung Fu Panda, what is he? Red Banden. I've never seen it. What? I know, I know, dude.

I know. I'm seeing it. I guess I wasn't aware that Dustin, I'm walking here, Hoffman was in it. I definitely didn't know that either. He's the mentor. He's the splinter. Yeah, he's the splinter. sort of except there's an even older splinter

who's a tortoise named Master Ugui. Well, that sounds like it would hit for me. Dude, it's great. They made like five of those movies. You think it's because they didn't hit? No, but they made seven, eight minion movies and I'm not dying to watch those. I have a, you know, I mean, this is

one of those generational differences, but in our parenthoods, my sons were the right age for Kung Fu Panda movies, so I saw all, like, the first three of them. Well, I'm definitely hollering at those. Oh, dude. I mean, Jack Black is fucking Man guy.

I know, but as you said, I figured you would have seen him anyway. No, you'd think because, like, I was about to make the argument of like, well, you know, I just now had a kid. So, but like, dude, I fucking stay what I was watching animated shits long before Bain came along. Right. So I've gotten a lot of DMs and stuff from people that don't hear for them that we're not doing this. It really don't. I got some that were jokingly really mean to you, Trey. I guess because you framed it as like, you know, I got this other thing.

And it was jokingly, but it was like, hey, man, praise a cunt. That made me mad too, because I also have other things going on. Well, you weren't here. Also, I know I wasn't. That's me trying to selfishly throw myself on a grenade. Like I have things going on. I'm not allowed to talk about things I got going on. You're so egocentric.

You won't even let me have that. I'm so mad. I'm so mad. It did make it seem like, you know, being you were just like. No, that's not what you just tried to say. You just try to say it did make it seem like me and you didn't have nothing going on, Drew, but I do. That's quite literally what you said. Yep.

So this is all. I didn't mean like, it's waving in all three directions right now, which is good. This is a good way for this to end. I feel like, I wasn't temporarily. I wasn't trying to put an emphasis on the eye as in like I do, Drew doesn't. I just, I'm the only person I can speak for. Do you know what I mean? No, I mean, you again.

I mean, I'm literally, fuck it. You're painting. You know, you got paint going on. Is that you said that's painting your hair? I have other stuff going on. Drew has stuff going on. I know you do. It was Trey that was trying to act like you didn't.

Not me. Yes, you did. Here's what's crazy about this, Trey. I'm talking to Trey right now, Corey. I'll let you speak. I feel like genuinely, I'm not saying I don't have that in me. Clearly I do.

It's coming out right now. It just, none of that, it never occurred to me that people thought I didn't have anything going on. Then he did this. Right. And he did this. And now I'm like, I got stuff going, like,

you know what I'm? I was just like, I don't know, man. It was funny that people jokingly blamed Tray. They clearly were in on the joke. Yeah, I saw that too. They wouldn't blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then now I'm like, I know stuff. Like, you made me that.

Right. I know, I'm toxic. I'm sorry. Yeah, but it's also. Don't do that. Now he's trying to be the bigger man. I'm not trying to be the bigger man. I just himself aware.

I'm aware of it. Like, for years you've wanted me to be this person and I'm trying to be it. I was wrong. Yeah. For years, you've wanted me to be that person. That's right. I was wrong. Great way to exit this show, frankly.

We really just keep it going because I'm not done. I think this is it. I think this is the way of it. Well, you have to close this. Let's just argue, yes. Because I'm still not done, by the way. Right. You never are.

I know, we know, dude. This is the only time I've ever been done is with this show, which people love. But anyway, I, so that was, I was the one who said, all right, let's put her down at least for now. I did do that. And so that was, that was me. fucking taking responsibility as opposed making sure people know, this ain't Corey or Drew, don't blame them,

this is me, you can blame me because I'm, you know, again, being a hero like I am, but Joe internalize that as, well, now people are going to think I don't hit.

And that's why, and I do people know that I do hit. I did do that. It's not what that was. Well, not immediately. I was also getting similar messages also. But,

and I did, I did want to say this, like, it has made me feel, Very good. Like, obviously, I know that the people that still listen to this show like it, otherwise they wouldn't be listening. Well, that's actually not true.

I've noticed that there's this huge trend in the world where people just continuously watch things or listen to things that don't hit for them just so they can complain about it. I kind of get that, though, depending. I don't think we have a, I don't think we have hate watchers. I don't think. But I've, like, hate watch TV shows before. because you're already invested in them. And that's what happens to these people with these podcasts you're talking about.

It's wild for me to, it's wild for me, though. Go ahead. You've not ever been hate attracted? I've been hate attracted for sure. It's just that when a podcast specifically stops hitting for me, I'll give it a couple more episodes to be like maybe this was a temporary tonal shift. And then I'll just be like, okay. I think you're talking about a different thing, though.

I think hate listening to podcasts would be like, I hate this person. Right. going to go hate watch their podcast so I can hate them more. And I'm not like, they stop hitting for me. I think that it's, no, I think he's, but I think it, when Corey says there's all these people that they still keep watching these shows that they do not like just so they can not like them. That's, they're hate listening. And that hits for them to hate these people.

Yeah, that's, that's just really far beyond me, even though I'm certainly a hateful person. You never done that with nothing? I don't have a, not as, not as long. Like me and Katie did that with the end of true blood, for example. I can tell you. By the time, true, but it's not, though.

It is, because those are stories that have an arc that you're like, I've got to see it resolved because I've spent so much time invested in it. But like a fucking podcast with three idiots,

it's not like that. I think there's a ton of people who do this with Joe Rogan now, for example. I'm glad this shows in. Yeah. You think, yeah, but I mean, I know there are.

But that's a great example of how I know that's not in me because when Joe Rogan stopped hitting for me, I just stopped fucking with it. I did too with him, but what I'm saying, is I don't see how, I really don't see how the impulse is that much different. And I've done that with other things.

It's because we don't hit enough, in my opinion, to make anybody feel that way. No, nobody's hate watching us. I already said that. Yeah, right. Right. Yeah, right. Okay. I just realized I actually am getting a lot of playfully mean-spirited messages.

I guess that's been my role, so that's appropriate. Yeah. This one says, I'm sad that I don't have a venue to hear you and Tray Interact. your duo episodes were my favorite. Please tell Corey, I said that because their love affair has its own show now, and I'm over it. And then I was like, I'm definitely going to tell him, thank you. And he said, there's no better gift I could give you than a way to troll Corey.

That's great. Ross. I was trying to find one was really sweet, but now I can't find out. I've had a ton that were very sweet, but also they would go from sweet to like, oh, wow, that's really depressing. real quick. Like, I don't know what I'm going to do with my Wednesdays anymore. Like, you have no idea how much, you know, you guys help. And that means so much to me to hear, but also, like, I can't help but being like, Jesus Christ.

It means so much. He texts as screen caps of those things and makes fun of y'all. Well, no, I'm just like, in my brain, I think, because I'm such a self-hater, I'm like, can you imagine how down you got to be to where this shit puts you in a better place? Well, again, and I called it, when. When me and Drew did the episode when you weren't here, like, elaborating on for people, I'm at least for now calling and considering it, you know, a hiatus. For sure, absolutely.

We already know pretty much that we're going to do like when. A live app at Zanis. Yeah. We'll still do that and still post it on the feed. And then, you know, and we'll do it next year too. Any other time, also anytime anybody,

one of us has a thing that's happening or a reason to come back on here and do it, then we can just do it. And then there'll be like surprise little eps for y'all. So it's not like, just like completely going away. Right. It's kind of just, we're shifting into sort of a,

how South Park has done it for a while, where sometimes they won't have a full season, they'll just have a special, and that's the thing, you know. Yeah. We're the same as them. This is not related. It's not any kind of retrospective question.

It's something that came up this morning. I wanted to ask you. Before you do, I feel like you were baiting me, like perfectly because I could move on or take the bait, and I'm going to take the bait. I am planning, and it depends on how this next thing I got going on goes, and it depends on if I ever get this fuck, look at the paint all over my hands,

if I ever get this fucking house done and get my studio built, I am going to do Bubba shot the podcast, and I'll do it on this feed, and I'll probably rotate guest hosts so that we don't all three have to be together. Like I'll do four with Trey, four with Corey, and then we'll also have a get. That's how I'm thinking I'll do it. That's super hits for me.

People have also mentioned that a lot in the messages. And I want to put it out there to sort of have the pressure of doing it because I just, once I get done with this house and then Well Reds over, you know, I mean, guys got to have more than one podcast. Am I a wife? You have to. Or am I suddenly openly queer, you know? Like, I've got to have three more podcasts.

Right. I was going to say for me, I'm barely doing stand-up. So I feel like I have to have five to like really compensate. The question I was going to ask you, Drew, although you appear to be frozen now for me. He's not. He good? He good? Okay, no.

He's, okay. You and Andy years ago, didn't you all have a thing with the name Terry? Have a roommate named Kerry? No, a thing with the name Terry. Oh, Terry, yes. Yes, I'm so glad you brought this up because Corey casually dropped that the other day. So this goes back to my college days. This is an inside joke between me and coach Daniel Chimel.

the athletic director and offensive coordinator at, I want to say Donaldson Christian Academy, it's relatively a new job for him. Donaldson? Nashville. We played football together at Marable. We had a friend named Chase who bought a shirt at Goodwill, and Chase was a country boy, Redneck.

He wasn't like an ironic hipster who did this. It was like he organically discovered buying ironic shirts without, to quote Tray's great joke about Rednecks, knowing the definition of irony and being completely immune to it. So he had a mechanic shirt with a name tag that was blank. Right. And he was super proud of it walking around, and he thought it was hilarious.

So imagine a good old boy fullback, walking around the dorms being like, look his shirt. You believe they just sold me this at Google for $2? Daniel, what if I said Terry right there? Drew, what if it said Terry right there? I said, me and then started calling everybody Terry. Andy eventually did and then me and Andy

how's this for the last episode boys let's get very close to do to it oh shit was that your dick right there no but that is me and Andy got matching tattoos that ain't his dick oh that's underwear

underwear and that says Terry right there in the heart it's Andy as a squid billy um drawn by paint monkey shout out paint monkey paint monkey drew me and Andy

as squid billies and then our buddy David, oh shit, the author, North Carolina. Joy. David, David Joy, yeah. Joy was like, you ain't got a hair on it

if you don't get that tattooed. And the next weekend, me and Andy got fucked up and got them tattooed on us. So I have Terry with an eye, she has it with an arm. Mine's, my forehead's so big as a squid billy,

fuck you, paint monkey, fuck you, John. So it's a big thing with us. Like we have, I have Terry tattooed on my body because we call each other Terry, especially when we're being playfully mean about how dumb the other one is.

Like close the door, carry down. Right. Well, and now, Coacho has this happening in his house too. Oh, big time. Yeah, Amber, there's two things that are consistent with my wife now, which is calling Bain.

At first, it was just when he would do something. Okay, so there was a video a long time ago where there was a dude to a wheelchair. I want to say it was a black dude. Maybe I'm wrong. But he was in a wheelchair. one of them electric wheelchairs, and somebody set off some fireworks that were like really close to him. Oh, yeah. And so he couldn't run away like as good as everybody else. And this dude in the back goes,

damn, back it up, Terry. Back it up, Terry. And so now Amber started off. And he just sits there and gets just like, exploded. Yeah, he palmed about these. So when Bain is like, when Bain is doing a thing where there's imminent danger looming, Amber will go, back it up, Terry, back it up, Terry. But now it's just become he's just Terry. Like it's like a dog. You know how you start calling a dog a random thing for some reason and then their name changes. It's like, well, their government name is this, but we call

it. Like my sister, her dog was Daisy, but he ended up everybody called her chicken. Our name was chicken. Even though her name was actually Daisy because it just evolves and stuff. So now my son is Terry. We got a dog. Yeah, we got a dog at Andy's parents that's ember, ember bean, bean, bean,

bean, bean, green bean and crazy. Beam, Bean. I don't think, Corey, has realized why Tray's bringing this up. And I know. So let's have it. I do, actually. This came up between me and him, because Corey then sent me a thing where he was portraying Bain as Terry when he's a grown man, right?

As like a character thing. And he was just like, this is that. And so I was like, I told him, I was like, what's just weird for me? Because, you know, my dad's name was Terry. So, like, I just, that's all I can think of is like, my dad. And then I was like, and I said, I know, I know that Drew, and Andy had something with this too, because I remember at that time having a similar reaction to it about, you know, being weird or whatever for me. And I just was like, why is everybody calling everybody?

Why, like, you know, for me, I don't know how Terry is the name. It feels like a weird coincidence. But both of those origin stories or explanations are perfectly, you know, logical and reasonable. It's just very weird for me. Well, you and I have talked about, and I wrote a bit about it. I'm going to put it on my next special. nominative determinism is such a deeply interesting concept to me. And I got to say that in some ways, you know, rock and roll,

God damn, boy, look at that. Your dad was a Terry. Absolutely. Huge Terry. What he's saying, God damn boy, look at that about is a Jonathan Waters film. Right. It's not a Terry. Right.

It's a very interesting. I'm kind of obsessed with nominative determinism. No, me too. Me too, yeah. And I think that subconsciously, that's kind of what the bit I was doing was, is like, if Bain continues to be Terry, this is what he will grow up to me. He will turn into Terry. Right, exactly.

The Ben Harper lyric, if you treat a child like a criminal, don't be surprised when he grows up to be criminal. Because every Terry I know, every Terry I know, while they are different, are still very Terry. Now, it's interesting to bring up the wheelchair video, though, because one of the main crux is of my bit. It's the first time I met a black Keith. It fucked up Keith for me. I was about to bring up black Terry's because I can think of too right now. Yeah, because Keith, you know, I had a Keith in mind and it's similar to a Terry. And then you need a Keith and they're smooth, which is the opposite of the white Keith.

Yeah, Keith sweat. Right. In the bit, I said something like, the only thing they have in common is they know how to change the wool and make a divorcee come. Hilarious. But like, other than that. I too, yeah. These are different men. I only know two Black Terries.

Three Black Terries. Oh, Black Terry. Bam, Lam. And they're all like a similar, they're actually all like levels of hitting football player. So like Jacked Black. So they're Terry Cruz, obviously, probably the most famous Black Terry, I think. Well, there's Teddy, no.

Then they're single Terry. Terry Cruz. Fictional, but same. You know, Terry Tate, office linebacker. God. those commercials were my favorite. Great. Do you still do that?

Is Terry Brue's more famous than Terry Bridgewater? What? It's Teddy Bridgewater. Oh, you're right. Teddy's kind of Terry. It's funny because I almost said Terry Pendergrass a minute ago or whatever. Lay your ass down. That's Teddy, too, right?

That's Teddy Pendergrass. So I almost did the same thing. But anyway, and then the third one is a guy that I just met. He's a comic from Alabama that lives in New York, but he played D1 college football. His name's Terry Thomas. Terry Thomas Jr., former linebacker. That's right. He's awesome, too.

He's a buddy of Rockies. They're both from Alabama. They do, you know, anyway, I met him in upstate New York recently. But he's, they're all, all three of those black terries are all like linebacker archetypes. Yeah. Yeah. You are like cool. You know what I mean?

It's not, like you said, it's just the anti-white Terry in every way, you know. what is a black name I don't think we're qualified for this but I'm going to throw it out whatever show's ending that the nomadive to the thing you know you hear it and the thing that pops in your head is not that cool

a black name that when you hear it that ain't it? Hercl. That ain't it? Hercl. That's the only way. But one of white guy made up that's not real. Definitely 100%. Yeah. That's a great question. Like what name suggests

a nerdy black guy. That's interesting. Or just not cool. Right. Well, yeah. You know. This is going to be testy. But I feel like nowadays, based on the stereotyping of the internet.

Jalen? Yes. Jalen. And it's, but it's like, again, I think the stereotype of Jailens is that it's like, it's like a mixed kid, right? Right. Because the white mama. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And so I think that there's my, like Jalen has a Karen-esque type. of sort of like attachment or association on the internet at least. So that's the best thing to come up with. I don't think it's uncool, but I think a negative one for them is Devante. It's so, Raven, that we finally let our guard down and just talking about black dudes. I mean, Dr. Adams and Dante Smith on this show.

Have we done it on the show? I think so. Probably, yeah. Oh, black terry up. Bambalam. Oh, black terry. Bam a lamb. Black Terry had a child.

Bambalam. The damn damn. Half white. Bamalam. Dude, fuck yes. We got one last song in. One last made up fight. Dude, we're fucking nailing it.

You should keep going, dude. Nah. No, see, it's only this good. But yeah, maybe. Who knows? What is it? It's indefinite, you know. No, no definites.

We have a fucking ad? I don't know. You tell me. Let me check while y'all hit. We had a type of ad that was going to last a while. Right. And I thought we like, you know. Yeah, I ignored that.

Why not ignored it? But I said, hey, we're stopping or whatever. And they were supposed to have handled it, I thought. Yeah. We don't do it today. We might have a, we might have one. I don't know. Who cares?

Yeah. I mean, I'll figure it out. figure it out. Well, we said when it was just me and Drew, we announced this, we said when you were here, we'd talk with, you know, reminisce and stuff. But I mean, do y'all want to do that? Does anybody have anything?

I would also like to say to everybody, because this is another type of message I got before you say this, and I'm going to look up to see if we have ads. So many people have messages saying, like, guys, I, I, this doesn't hit for me, but I understand, like, you got to do what you got to do. But, like, please, please, y'all, just keep, just keep up with each other, you know, like stay, stay in contact and all this stuff.

And like I need to, y'all to understand that like there has never been a group of people more in contact than us. Like for people that don't live in the same place, we, wouldn't you say like on average there's at least 250 to 300 individual text messages sent in that thread every day combined? You know what I mean? I'd say on a busy day, yeah, because I mean,

I know that like yesterday, yesterday I was. I was busy outside of the thread all day from like nine until like four. And the thread had like 115 unread messages in it or something. Right. So, you know, that's probably right right. All of which super valuable. Yeah.

Here's a kind one. Please don't kill well, Red Pod. I moved from Mississippi to Los Angeles 10 years ago about the same time y'all went live. I've listened since. It got me through a lot. Well, we appreciate that. That does help. Please,

please, by the way, continue to support our solo efforts, you know. This pot is ending, but we still talk bullshit in other mediums. Yeah. Except for Gary,

who has nothing going on, as everybody knows. Yeah, well, that reminds me my favorite one. I'm glad you gave me that leeway, Trey, because you're proving him correct.

Oh, great. Tell Trey, he is a cunt. I will never support anything he ever does, gravy baby for life. Hits. Which I know.

that that's Chris. I know Chris. So that was in jest. In jest. Yeah. If the Stradd is saying to that, I would still tell you, but I would be in a very different, like the smile would be so big. This is, this is a different version of the Terry thing with both the all. It's very different. And it like won't hit for Drew. So it hits me. But we can call you a con. Chris. Do you know that we have, do you know that one of our cats is named gravy in my house? Nice. I didn't know that. I call. I call. We call her. or I call her Gravy Baby all the time. A little gravy baby. So I say gravy baby all the time.

And then remember that that's the name of your podcast and feel like I'm stealing a thing from you, even though, you know, it's not related. But yeah. Oh, you know, why wouldn't that hook for me? I don't know. You don't like cats and stuff. You don't like pets. I don't like cats.

I love when you hit. I love when you hit. No, my fault you never hit. No, here's what you think. I love when you hit. It's just that when you hit for me is when you're not hitting for you. That's right. That's key.

I'd say for me too, that's, I think for all of us. And I think that I have that with several people, it's nice to have someone in my life where I don't, where I'm not the sitcom dad. Right. Yeah. I know that we've had conversations about that, about how that is like you outside or whatever, but that's wild to me, you know, because it's so me here. We were at a dinner party last week at our friend's house. She invited us over, you know, like welcome to town and all that. And I genuinely think that Andy meant it in a genuine way.

But once she realized it hit for people, she leaned in. But we just like, oh, and this and that. And I was like, yeah, we got to get this kitchen done. And I think I said, yeah, I thought it'd be done by now. We'd like to have y'all over. I thought it'd be done by now. And Andy goes, Lord, me too. I thought it'd be done by now.

And buddy, the entire group started going in on me. And how I can't do shit. Don't hit it. By the way, this, like the bar that I built, this kitchen looks fucking incredible. It's just that the paint's coming slow because we have a two-year-old. Yeah, you can't be. But I'm getting ripped like I am, you know, the world's worst husband, I guess. Welcome to my life.

And dude, gravy baby, speaking of, there's another plug for it. that's all DJ does. All DJ does on Gravy Baby podcast is tell us about a month before everyone else what is going, like right now the whole internet is talking about the Houthis. DJ has been talking about the Houthis for three months. Everyone's interviewing that guy that DJ calls Dr. Chana. I'm sure that's racist. I don't know who's name. You know what I'm talking about?

He made all these predictions about the war. He predicted when we were going to go to war with Iran. He's on everybody's party. Theo has had him on. Yeah, I believe you. Anyway, DJ was into that guy too much. So all DJ does is be ahead of the curb and the zeitgeist and then pretend I'm hurting his feelings

so that our comments are people mad at me. Super wise. Picking on DJ. Oh, you can't. That's the thing. I mean, people are, you know, territorial about their favorite comics already, but DJ specifically like, yeah, you can't.

And it ain't even, it's also, I mean, it is that, but it's also like, I think with a lot of the people, Skeuniverse fans or whatever, it's weird because it's like funny to them sometimes, but some of them also don't like it when, when like we, if they feel like we are being, like actually mean to each other or whatever,

because I told, I told Corey recently, a funny thing that I like to do sometimes whenever possible is get Corey real pissed off at Mark when Mark ain't there. Yeah. on a podcast specifically because then Corey will just go on this whole thing about fuck Mark.

Yeah, and I'll get messages being like, dude, Corey needs to lay off of Mark a little bit. That's Corey's problem with Mark. And I do tell him, I'm like, well, you don't. I was like, you don't know Mark. You don't know him. You don't know him. You don't know.

Baby, Dee. Because Corey is airing it publicly. You're not seeing the Mark half. Right. He would never. I think people get the DJ half. Because one time someone said something, it was so funny, they was like, no, no, dude, I get it.

We're here for DJ being hilarious. We don't see you preventing him from accidentally walking into traffic. Right. Also, we are just, like, when I do that about Mark, I'm just doing it as a bit. Yeah. For the most part. I mean, don't even wrong, there's a reason I'm real good at it. Right, but you'll be like, dude, Mark is the worst thing about this country.

Mark, Mark, and everyone like him is the reason that Trump won. Mark, no one is worse than fucking Mark. I'm just doing it so Mark will have to hear it later because he can't defend himself. Also, it's true. Fuck him. That's so true to me because it's literally the opposite. Yeah, right, of course.

Oh. He just don't know. I just kind of bait you. It didn't work. What did you find out about that? No ads. Yeah, we're good. Yeah, no ads.

We're going out of. Oh, Black, Black, Ter. Bam, Blah. Oh, Black Ter. I wish y'all could hear my beats that I'm making to these songs, while we're doing it. Only I can hear it. You've got like a soundboard hooked up or something that you can play with, but only you hear it.

It's not a soundboard. It's just, well, it is funny, but it's just my MIDI keyboard is hooked up because before this, I was making beats. Right. And so it's still just hooked up to garage band. I didn't close the thing. And I just went over here and hit it, and I was like, oh, I can hear that hit. So like, when y'all are talking, I'm making like little beats in my head to what y'all are saying. and it's really fun for me. Loon a tick.

I mean, it's for me. Big time learning tech. Yeah. I was going to make a video about this and ended up being like four minutes long and I didn't feel like editing it and then I had to go paint my house. You all mind are that. So I'll just do it on here. You guys already know about it, but it'll be fun for people.

You know, as a hot white guy in comedy, I get a lot of opportunities that many people don't get to experience. As a man with dozens of followers, I'm constantly getting in a, with emails and opportunities for brand deals and services that help me get brand deals. And I ignore them. And then sometimes they follow up and I usually ignore that one. But if you hit me with three and especially if you end it with the PS. When they hit you with just bumping this back up.

If you don't want to receive any more emails from me, just let me know. Well, Jennifer Wilson, you ask for it. Persona is a new service that they're trying to get me to sign up for to help me get brand deals. And in the follow-up, after telling me what it is, they told me a story, which I assume is like some class they went to. They're telling you this is how to roll it out. You tell somebody what it is, and then you share a story. So here is, I thought I'd share a quick example of how one of our UGC creators, Sarah, has used our platform to grow her brand deals consistently to 6.1. thousand dollars per month.

And then it's this whole story about Sarah tried for 18 months a year and a half of her life to get brand deals. She closed less than 5% of the hundreds of applications she sent out per month. That feels pretty good. Making less than $100

per campaign. All bold. The shift. She started using persona and relied on the brand signals to identify 30 high intent, but none of these words mean fucking anything. Yeah, this should be called persona non grata.

Except for the PS. Maybe that's what PS stands for. I don't know what it stands. Persona. Persona. Which I knew what that meant. Let me know if you don't want me. So this is what I wrote back. Hi, Jennifer. To be completely, almost insanely honest,

the story you wrote me about Sarah has made me so depressed. I had to lie down. I cannot believe there are people out there, quote, pitching hundreds of brands to beg them to let them shill their poison. In fact, I actually believe a chatbot wrote that tale for you, which is scary because the state of American culture is so rotten that I'm not sure the depths of it could be captured by our greatest writers any better than it was by the macabre short story you sent me.

I weirdly hope Sarah is real and that was true, because if Sarah is a figment of AI's imagination, we are truly doomed. So to answer your question, would I like your AI assistant to help me secure contracts where I'm paid the light of my followers about a subscription service no one needs? Frankly, I'd rather pour boric acid into my eyes and hold my small son as I die slowly, whispering into his toddler ear. I'm sorry, we fail to. As I fade into oblivion, that would scar him for life. But at least it would be real. Signs,

Morgan, parentheses, a hot white guy. Tremendous. She hasn't replied, but I'll keep other than that. Yeah. You think Jennifer's real?

No. Barely a chance. I don't know. Maybe she... Her name is Gupta. And he's like... Yeah. Right.

They were going to fake it. Surely they'd give her a different name, but... But the fake name is Jennifer. Oh, right. Yeah, oh, right, yeah, yeah. That's exactly what's happening here. I thought he was Jennifer Gupta is what I saw.

Yeah, okay. No, no, no. I mean, it's possible that there is an actual person who is reading these and prompting it versus some of them are just completely automated to where there's not even a real person three levels up. Dude, I hope it's too char's as funny or funny your cousin. I hope it's too sure. And like he saw my email and like his response. oh, the American is sad.

Like, he's like reading it and he's like, no, I get the bit, dude. It's just like, what are you so upset about? I emailed you. Wow, if you have to take time out of your busy day having food that's healthy in your fucking refrigerator and water that runs, you fucking piece of shit. Dude, you've just reminded me

to something that pissed me, has pissed me off, which is like, you talk about like they send you three emails. Usually the third is like, the second is usually, hey, bumping this up and hanging you again so that you'll and then the third is something like by the way if you don't want to talk to me you can just blah blah blah but oftentimes there will be a fourth which is especially if it is a real person or whatever that's like Jesus you know I was just trying to fucking communicate with you the least you could do is is message me back and I'm like actually

that's not true the least I could do is what I'm doing that like what do you mean you think that just because you found my email that I now owe you anything what do you mean like for the most part, it's, if I can tell it's a real person, I will respond back with a, hey, not for me, or sometimes,

I don't know, maybe tell me more, but like, I don't fucking have to do that. What do you mean? Who are these entitled motherfuckers that are like pissed off at you if they cold call you

and you ignore it? Yes, it reminds me of that Neil Brennan post. It's not a bit he did. I guess he didn't think it was like, you know, sad enough to be one of his bits or whatever. hilarious.

He said, I hate people who are like, it doesn't hurt to ask. And he's like, sometimes it does. It does. Sometimes it has hurt our relationship and I've lost respect for you because why the fuck would you ask me that? Yeah. Yeah. And also, yeah, time is valuable.

Even any, especially when you're a parent, like time becomes increasingly more valuable. So like, yeah, like, I don't have the time to talk to you about a thing I'm not interested in. Fuck you. Go away. Also, it's the point of an email, right? Yeah. You ask someone to email you so you can take your time with it and then either ignore them or respond. I don't know.

Correct. This is not the same thing. Drew, I'm certain you don't, but I'm curious whether Corey gets, Corey, do you get a lot of DMs from like fitness influencers? The most.

So many. Okay. Yeah. Why would you get those? You're in shape. Yeah, I'm always like, I'm always a little,

I'm always, they're looking for like, you know, doughy pieces of shit who they know are insecure about it. I never even thought about it like that. Really? How could you not have thought that immediately? Because.

How could you not? Come, bro. Why don't you think they're doing it? Well, the only, like, it makes so much sense, and of course that's that. But, like, I used to post a lot of fitness and workout stuff when Rob was trying to get his company off the ground. And also, I post a lot of videos of me walking and stuff. And I just thought it was one of those things.

We're like, oh, this guy does all that stuff. So I never once thought they were like, he's in great shape, you know, but I was like, they just, I'm in that arena in their head somehow. Right. And they can tell what you're saying. That I don't hit. They still don't hit. Right. How could you not really did it? How could you possibly not? And to his credit, like, it is insane that that didn't. Oh, fuck. All right here. Let's see if I get this. Is that something bad just happened? It's just speaking of what a brand deal that I had agreed to and am actively working. on just I just I missed a deadline because I'm an idiot or or it's tonight actually and I'm going to have to do it and I don't hit for me yeah I mean look it's not like the best but I just put it up I mean dude I got a belly under a hitting that you got I mean we've talked about I used to have a bit about my belly or basketball I see I see why to hit me up now

yeah but also though while you do have a belly sometimes I don't know what you're what's happening with you right now because I only see shoulders up but like it's fine right now You at least very much look like a person who has been in really good shape before and could get in really good shape really fast. Whereas like I feel like I just look like a fucking train wreck that has always not hit. And also, again, these people normally, it's like they're, with me at least, it's like they're wanting to like share platforms basically. You know, like cross promote or whatever. Yeah.

It's not the same thing as like a full-bom brand deal or whatnot. He called you a fat ass. Now he's going to call me someone with. too little of a following for someone to even think of that. Here's coming. I'm just saying that. I wasn't going to say that, but I'm sorry that you feel that way by yourself.

All I was trying to say is I don't want, that is not the same as Jennifer Wilson is what I'm saying. Right. Like to me, and these people are like, if there was one that was like down the road for me, I'd probably do it. But they're usually not.

And so I'm like, well, I'm not going to do. I don't, that doesn't make any sense to me. Yeah, I did why those are just reaching out because they have something tangible to offer. Right.

That's what I'm saying. I don't even, that lady. was just saying fucking words. Yeah, right. Yeah, that just don't make sense and also don't hit.

Well, it's also they just know that, like, you know, it's such a thing now. People, you build in a following online so you can make money off of it,

which is through brand deals. So they know there's all these people that are like, the idea of being like, we can help you find brand partners. It's like, I get why that's a thing. And I also get why that's like depressing.

And, okay, thank you. The depressing part is what I was waiting on, though, because I was like, yes, but it used.

to be that like you either pursued something creative because it drove you or you were driven by fame, which is like kind of a sickness, but I get it. And then the endorsements were like a side effect where you supplement your income and or buy the house and fuck off forever. And I get that. But now the goal is to sell out. Sorry for like sounding punk rock or whatever. Like I got over the idea of accusing someone of selling out because I bought a house. And like I get it. But the idea that Sarah spent 18 months of her one fucking life on this plane of existence, emailing hundreds of brands who sell what, fake Ozempic, begging them to let her shill for them is so,

that's the economy now. That's also not an insanely long time to attempt to do a thing. Like, dude, we've all been attempting. It is if you're begging to be a whore. No, no, no. I, yeah, you're right. You're right. I'm saying, like, in the world where it's like she's not just begging to be a whore,

it's like, I'm just, I want my talents to be used and I'm trying to, whatever the fuck. It's like, dude, I've been trying to make it for 22 years. You know what I mean? And I mean, don't be wrong. I've had some success and I have a comfortable life. But, like, all, any type of fame or, like, in this arena, like, it takes time. Like, 18 months is not that long to fucking. try to pursue a new thing.

Yeah, I agree with you. I'm going to like maybe get in the weeds on my woo-woo for a second. I just think it's a complete perversion of our gifts. Couldn't agree more. But, okay, but Sarah. I understand why we all do that from time of time. Sarah ain't even doing that, though. I'm saying they're, we, the three of us are like comedians who wanted to be

comedians and didn't even know when we decided we wanted to be comedians that any of this shit would ever even be part of it. Had no idea. I just wanted to talk about. That's true. And now it's like you just, you have, if you're a young comic start now, you have to realize that you have to play this particular game.

It's the fucking new version of show business or whatever. But like that's all new. Sarah and people like that are like, it's, they want to be like just, just be an influencer. Right. Without talent.

You're talking about like a perversion of our art and a creative pursuit. They don't have none of that. I know. None of that is even part of it for them. But they want to influence people. I know. Without like, but like,

with no notion of what they're, going to influence them to do. I almost prefer the megalomaniac who wants to like, you know, do eugenics or something because it's like at least Hitler had a fucking vision. Please don't clip that, Corey. What I'm saying is like, someone who's like evil even, I'm like, right, but you're driven by this thing inside you. You don't even want to influence people to a specific thing. You just want to be the influencer. Right. It blows my mind. It's everything. You don't want to do politics. You just want to be a politician. You don't want to do. do comedy, you just want to be a stand-up comedian.

It's wild to me. Yeah, like, we've talked about this all the time, but, like, all of those things, to me, are just side effects or occupational hazards because of what we do and the fact that we're on camera and stuff. Exactly. Like, I, like, this is what I've always said, and I mean it, is like, I have no desire just to be famous. I want to be, um, I want my, respected to what you do. Respect to what I do. And a side effect of that is that, right.

But like, if a genie came to me right now and was just like, hey, I will make it to where you get paid $5 million a year to write jokes and TV shows and stuff like that. But you're never really going to be like a red carpet guy. And most people won't know he already go fucking yet sign me up. That's awesome. I just, because that's the part that I want. That's the only part that I want is the success. I hear you. I think maybe I'm old because when I meet someone who just wants to be famed,

I'm not saying I'm not like turned off, but I'm like, I get it. I don't even think influencers are famous. They just are people who get to do advertisements on there. I think they're famous, don't you? They think a lot of the most bad ones that you're talking about, they think that they are famous. They just want the popular part without any of the stuff that should make a person popular. Like, you should be popular because you do a thing that hits that other people don't do. Is the way to get that trying to get brand deals?

That's what I'm saying is like, why would you get a brand deal? Like if you're just someone who wants brand deals, it's like, to me it's you get a brand deal because people are like, look at this person who is talented that people clearly like, they should advertise our product. Not here's a person who just wants to advertise a product. It's like, why should I listen to you? You know what I mean? I mean, why should anyone listen to me? But at least they're like, I like that guy. He's funny.

Oh, he uses this. Cool. Maybe I'll use his promo cut. Yeah, I think I'm just old. And I think you're right. But to piggyback off that, in my head, it's like, well, if you are just an egomaniac who wants to be famous, it's odd to me that you're sending emails to brands. Right. Do you think that's what makes you popular?

Right. Like, what you should be doing in those 18 months is influence. Get your ass out there and influence. Yeah, or just make videos that are entertaining and be an entertaining person and get your followers. I don't know. I don't know what it made. get pregnant, raise a family. Yeah.

Kill you. Explo. Explo those children for Internet Cloud. Correct. Be a parenting influencer. Boom. Do you think about it? You know?

You got to have a thing. You got to have a thing. Everybody's got a thing. You know, have a few things. Name them something that reflects your own ego and not the experience they're going to have in the world going back to nominative determinism. Met Echo this week. He was a cool kid. didn't necessarily hate the name, just like,

and I just like related to what I'm saying, I'm like, did you think about his experience in life being called Echo? No one ever did that. They don't. Like they clearly don't or they wouldn't pick those, you know, names like that.

Like when you said Echo, I thought of like River Phoenix and all that, but River's really like. His first name was River. His first name was River? His friend's name was River. Right on. But like River,

like maybe it's because I know River Phoenix and also River is on slow horses that I'm like, that one's not. really that bad. But it's just like, real word that's tangible. We know what it is. It's also, but compared to like, you know, Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow naming their kid, Apple, River is way better. But yeah, no, but like, I will see some of these kids. Especially now, there's like, it's like, there's this trend of like white women. You have to give your kid a name that no one has ever had.

You have to be original. And it's like, sometimes that can work out in cool is cool. And also, obviously, there was a first time that someone was ever named Eric. you know, something has to come from somewhere. But like you're not at all thinking about the fact that whenever someone meets your kid when he's an adult, they're going to be like, that's fucking weird. Dude, it's another thing in a long line of things that shitty white people made fun of black people for doing, making up names that don't make sense, and for a long time. And then they started to realize actually it's cool and I want to be like that.

Yeah. With my people, there's at least a reason. Mark yesterday was sort of trying to make the case that, it with white people in particular that it like the way he put it like originated with Mormon types and and spread out from there but I was I was like there's versions of that in like my white trash hometown and my own family and everything you know it's like I but he was saying he's like he was like you know in Mormon world it's definitely a huge thing with Mormons like without like they're probably the worst about it if you go on like the

I did not know that. The R slash tragedy subreddit, which is all about that. It's tragedy spelled like a person's name. Yes. E. I, G-H. Yeah. Right.

And it's, it's probably 75% of them are like Mormon people having babies, right? But Mark was saying like, because in Mormon country, he's like, they got like four last names and there's, you know, 17 families or whatever. They're all just the same, like, exact same white people, you know. They're all just like, whatever Brown, whatever Smith, whatever Lee, whatever. And so it's like, it's trying to find a way to differentiate it. Yeah, well, just be different.

So then they come up with a name that is, it's been done a million times, but you just spell it super dumbly. Which is stupid. So stupid. So stupid. Like, as someone who has a common name, but is spelled a couple different ways,

so it's always getting misspelled. Like, you're just set up for a life of that happening every time, but it's no one's fault, but you're fucking moms. Yeah. I ask me how I know. You know, I, the bit I'm going to end up doing about nominative determinant. Thank you.

It was eventually going to get into. We did the opposite of that. And I am going to frame it that way. Thank you, Trey. It's like, no, I said it. You disagree with me. Thank you for agreeing with me. Like, these people aren't thinking about how that kid's going to experience life.

Andy and I failed to consider how we're going to experience life having a fucking 11-year-old country boy with beautiful blue. eyes named Rosco. This motherfucker is going to get the walls pregnant. And that's going to be all the fault. You feel me? Like, we didn't think about how we were going to experience having a

teenager named Roscoe. Yeah, I hear you. And on that note, like, you know, Bain is a unique name, like, in the sense that you don't hear a lot of people named Bain, but it's also a regular name and a family name. So, like, it is possible to do it without fucking

having to, you know, go into a fucking name generator online. Yeah, I saw years ago when he was still little, I saw a list online. Apparently in New Zealand, or maybe Australia or both, you know, they essentially the same place. Hey, way. Dude, I'm there's laws. There's a list of names you're legally not allowed to give a child in one of those places. Good.

Is it like Adolf? I'm sure that's on there. Surely. Also on there. It's amazing if it wasn't. Also on there. was Bishop and I was like, I saw that and I was like, what the fuck? Is it a church stuff?

Yeah. It's because that's a title. It's like naming someone. You guys should really watch this episode on YouTube. I barely caught it. You were froze like that for me for like 20. Oh, word. I didn't catch it.

That's a bad. And I barely got the pig. I barely got my feet. Like it changed right after. I'm so happy. It's a classic me face. You want to talk about Terry. Yeah.

This looks just like, you know that muck's, that looks like you, this is the most that mug shot. Wow, yeah, you're right. That's amazing. But anyway, it's church stuff. It's like naming somebody. You can't name them Prince or King or any of that shit either, right? So,

Bishop was on that list for that reason, which to me is different because I was like, well, I don't think about church stuff. You know what I mean? Also, churches here don't even really have bishops. I guess, what, Catholics have bishops? Well, New Zealand's very Catholic or used to be, right? Am I wrong about that? Yeah, I guess.

I don't know. Now, I've never met a bishop in my life. And I'm talking about the person who has the job of bishop. Like, y'all ever met a bishop? I've not met a bishop. A cardinal? No. I don't think so.

That's pretty high up. Cardinals are super high up. That's like on deck, ain't it? Because archbishop is twing bishop and cardinal, I think. So I think you would have crossed past with a bishop and I ain't. Yeah. I ain't. You might cross past with a bishop.

I wish I had the pitcher pulled up. I wish I had you saying that. Oh, you can buy cross fast with a bishop with that face. What's going on here, Corey? Oh, I was, you brought up the Terry thing again, and I was going to share my video that I sent Trey for context. Like, this is Terry. Just, it's 20 seconds on.

Tell you what, man. Goddamn song. Awakens me like a fucking sleep raising, dude. Every time I hear it, I just want to, goddamn get a four-locco, start calling everybody gay. I'm a little bit of a girl. You know what I mean?

God damn. God damn. Yeah. This is who Bame will be. If he keeps going by Terry. Yeah. I don't know if you were here when I was telling Trey that I got a bunch of dust in my throat from cutting. Jesus Christ.

There might be a little dust in your throat now. Ryewall. Drywall, yeah. Greg got Macyo thiela now. He gave me mesothelioma and it made me act like that. And my theory is that's ex-bust. Yeah. But my theory is that's why they're like that.

That's the same thing. They're hell and drywall dust and they just start saying slurs. It's like how the boomers are going insane because they inhaled all that lead. What's the idea? Yeah. Yeah. That's like a real valid thing. Like a real thing.

He and Razi and Andy have one. We're one. You got to be three. and a half or under or it's danger zone because of these cabinets. I'm telling y'all, this kitchen has tried to kill us. Yeah, so mine has done that to me too, but I've helped it. Right, right, right, right, right. Yeah, the kitchens is an accessory to the crime.

The funny thing, though, is as I told Trey in text, like, all of that in my brain is like, this is what Bain will be if he keeps going by Terry. But the reality is, is that when that song came on, those are just personal thoughts that I genuinely had. And I was like, God damn, dude. You're like, just here, anytime I hear a nickelback, I just like revert to who I was as like a 17-year-old.

And that's Terry. I can't believe I didn't become Terry. That one in particular, right? That's because that, wasn't that? Was that animals you were listening to? Yeah. It's so stupid and great. Bro, just talking about getting jacked off in a fucking truck or whatever.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Having to tell her dad like, no, I was kissing her mouth, not her pussy. Yeah, right. Yeah.

I'm trying to convince her dad that wasn't in the mouth that I was kissing. Is that what y'all were saying? Ain't that the lyrics to... Yeah, that's... Animals. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, something about having... He's trying to...

I don't know. She got her hand on his... I'm gonna pull up the lyrics. What is it? Yeah. Animals... Nickel back. Because, yeah, it's such a different song.

It was somebody talking about it, and I thought they were lying. Yeah. Dude. No, it's, it's very real. All right, let's see here. I'm driving back on black. Just got my license back. God damn. You can't fucking just look at a website no more.

I got this feeling in my veins. This train is coming off the track. I'll ask polite if the devil needs a ride because the angel on my ride ain't hanging out with me tonight. I'm driving past your house while you were sneaking out. I got the car door opened up so you can jump in on the run. Your mom don't know that you were missing. She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you that I've been kissing. No. Never going to quit. I don't know. I really like how... I feel like it's great that rock and roll has stopped openly talking about fucking 16-year-olds

and now is just implying that they're fucking 16-year-olds. Yeah. You know what's the far superior version of that song that's the more PG-13 country version from around the same time? Oh, yeah. Benzley's what was I thinking? Yeah, that's true. That's the same song.

Pretty much the same song. And in my opinion, and I like animals by Nickelback, but what was I? thinking as a fucking straight up banger dog Craig Morgan's making like a little bit of a comeback he's popped up on my feet on my feet. That's Dirk Bentley. Oh, Dirk Bentley, my bad.

Yeah. What about, didn't John Michael Montgomery have one similar to that? Hmm. The only thing, when you say John Michael Montgomery, the first thing that pops into my mind is that song that him and boys to men both did.

Yeah, it wasn't that, but it was, something about, we sure got our feet wet mama. No, that's Sammy Kershaw. That's also similar.

Anyway, it doesn't matter. Yeah, I mean, country and picking up a girl to, you know, bust her out or whatever. It's probably. And Jerry Lee Lewis is where these two cross. I didn't, uh, I didn't mean to save it for the end, but I do happen. Is this anything I was really wanted to do. Go for it. I think this is one of those where it's like so obvious that anyone can do it, but if you get it out first, you know what I mean?

You win, yeah. Maybe someone's already done this. But I heard, I had a friend say this the other day. well, he only calls when he wants something. Right. Well, yeah. To me, I'm like,

yeah. That's when you call. Right. I really won't even call. I won't call unless I need desperately something. Well, that's the whole bit. It's like,

I hear people say that about their friends and I get their point, which is like, you don't want a friend that makes you feel used. That's true. God, if one of you calls me, right. And you don't want something.

Right. That's worth. We are getting in a fucking fight. That's so much worse. With you. Here's the thing, though, and I do think millennials, I think generationally we have like some of that. But that's what, like, I do think that there's a lot of people that just they are, that is not how they feel about it. Right.

You know what I mean? Like, right. Well, I call my mama in this fashion. I agree with Drew, that's crazy to me too. But I'm saying it's one of those things where it's like other people. Yeah. You think it's too crazy to people that they will, that they'll be too on board immediately. They don't even know what I'm talking about.

No, I think they'll probably know what you're talking about. but I think it might I just, to me, I wonder if there will be enough people that will just be like, yeah, I'm not, I'm not with you on that, bro. Like that type of thing. But that's, but that's, no, I love that. I, that's my, that's my way. That helps engage with this premise. Yeah. I will at least make you laugh at how probably I think you're done by the end of.

Also, let me convince you to agree with this premise. That's half of comedy. It's like, let me present a thing that you think you don't agree with and then I'll tell you why. This is, this is a similar thing. I feel about when people like if someone dies tragically or something or just dies regularly and you're like hey

are you going to the funeral and they'll be like no no no I don't like funerals and it's like no one does right no one do you know a person that's like oh fuck yeah Jeffrey died I get to go to the funeral like the only sad but dude I can't wait for a casserole while I'm wearing a black

suit like I had a bit one time that was like you ever you ever trying a suit and it fits so good that you just, you kind of can't wait for someone to die so you can wear it, which is stupid. But it's like, that would be the only reason to like funerals is, it's just nobody likes them, dude. You're, you're supposed to go because you're a good person and the family's suffering. You're supposed to go and it not hit because it's certainly not hitting for them. But like, just blows them, because some people use that and they think people will

go, oh, right on, well, no, he just doesn't like funerals. That's a perfectly valid reason not to go. and it's like, bruh, nobody likes them. Yeah, man, I'm with you. That reminds me, too. Not a bit, but just the premise I had thought it was, as I'm sick of stopping for him. And that might be a small town thing where I moved back to Scott County. Oh, funerals.

My dad got such a big fight over this. You know, I mean, I get, we got a pair of respect to the wife and the brother and the best friend. After that, y'all need to carpool. Get your fuck out of the way. Me and dad got in, I'm not, like, dad pulled over the car and, like, was ready to fight me because I brought, I've said that to him. I was like, I was like, dude, I was like, I get it back in the day when time moved slower.

I was like, but in this day and age, everybody's got three fucking jobs. Everybody's got like, our, our economy and world is not set up for us to just stop. Yeah, I don't fucking know you. I got to be late because you died early. That's what I'm saying. Like, yeah, right. Good point. When you get to work, do you think they're going to listen to that as an excuse?

Like, no, it's just your inconvenient. What? You're about to cause enough. funeral, frankly. What do they do in like cities and stuff? Not that. Fuck off. What I'm saying is I live basically like right by a funeral home.

And they don't do that. I have never, I don't think in the 10 years I've lived in Burbank. I don't think I've ever seen a funeral procession from anywhere to anywhere. I'm saying this from the inside. I'm allowed to say this. These are my people. Because people in cities have grown the fuck up. Yeah, they got shit to do.

Well, no, if you see a homeless man, take a shit in a solo cup and then try to throw it at a family. You're going to be like, you know what? I don't think we all have to pull over for funerals or worry about kneeling for the fucking troops or whatever. Yeah, because Frank, it's like, you've got to pay respect. And it's like, if I was going to pay respect, I would have gone to the funeral. But I don't fucking know them. So, well, what if they were a pedophile? Overall, just sit on the side of the road being like, oh, God.

Like, I don't ever, people die, dude. People fucking die. And again, I'll stop for the first five cars. Yeah. After that, tell me his middle name, person in a seventh car. Right. Dead dude's middle name without looking at the funeral brochure, tell me his middle name, motherfucker.

This is bullshit. Also, it's not even an issue of like, okay, I'll stop for five cars. Sometimes you don't have a fucking choice. You know what I mean? Like, because everybody in front of you stopped and everybody, And it's like if you go around, not only like everybody's, well, look this fucking, like, you're going to get on. Oh, there will go around. I know.

And I want to see that. And he should. I did. He should. And the genesis of this bit is it was a two-lane road. I wasn't even going around. I was just moving at the same rate as them. And this dude starts screaming at me out of the window.

He's 40 cars back. That's not true. He's at least 12 cars back. And I wanted to be like, yeah, how well did you know him? Right. Who gives a fuck? Why don't you show me some respect? It's a two-lane road.

Right. They just, just fucking, just quit, dude. One for the dead. One for the alive. Right. Yeah. Like, and they're like, well, you, we do this because it makes it easier for all of them to get to the cemetery in an orally. How about just start later?

Just they're not doing shit. They've taken off the day for a funeral. Get there when you fucking get there. See, they're in a hurry, Corey, and their time is valuable. Right. But mine apparently is insignificant because no. no one I knew well enough to put a suit on has died recently. You know what I'm going to start doing?

Following them to the cemetery and going. And when somebody's like, who are you? I'll be like, you made me stop. So I figured I'd just see this thing through. Yeah, I spent as much time with him as you fucking did. Right. Car number 22. I'm just showing my respect, you know, and I didn't know if,

I didn't know if flashing my lights and stopping and putting my hand over my fucking heart. I had like, I, my dad was one time we did it. Like, we were in the car together. This is when I think all of this started. And my dad was pissed at me because I didn't take my hat off. He was like, you took your hat off. You got to show respect. I'm like, first off, can I explain to you the genesis and origin of why we take our hat

off and why that's no longer a thing that it matters? Like, also, I don't believe in God. And I'd certainly believe that if God existed, he could get through this layer of fucking cotton that's on my head. Yep. Well, all right. How about this? Sing us out, Chob, not for.

Oh, we ended on a funeral. We did. That's nice. Well, plug shit. We got to plug. Yeah, yeah. Go to Treycrader.com, send me on the road. I'll be in Austin, Texas this weekend.

Drew will be there one night. I don't really want to say, though, if that's all right, Drew, because I want people to have to roll the deck. If you haven't got the tickets yet, just buy the ticket you won't. You know, and you might see Drew if you're lucky. Kind of wish I hadn't said that because now when people show up, they'll be like, Drew wasn't here. This don't hit. Anyway, just fucking come to Austin.

And then later on I'll be in East Tennessee. I mean, he's going to see after that, which I can't wait for. The best plug I've ever heard of my. And then Boston, Austin, Boston at the end of the month. Yes, at the end of the month. All at traycrouter.com. Right on. Drusifer.

I have a headlining show in Austin. Yeah, you got to say what night it is. Just do it. I guess if you figure out, if you want to see me that bad, you could come to both, I suppose. I don't even know if that's like a house show. I may not even advertise it. I am about to announce Knoxville on Black Friday the day after Thanksgiving. I'm going to be in Atlanta at the Laughing School, the weekend,

all weekend of October 8th, 9th, 10th, whatever that weekend is. Every show that they have that weekend, I'll be on at the Lappin School in Atlanta. The next weekend I'll be in Atlanta, I think. I won't announce that again. Listen to Gravy, baby. We've got a new theme song, and I'm going to make Tray say it in a Scottish accent. That's going to believe our new album out. Super hit.

If you're not in Austin, sign up to my newsletter slash substack at Corey Ritesfordu.com, where I write and post pointless dribble that hits for fucking no one but me. But you don't have to pay for it unless you want to, and then you can. I'm just kidding. It hits for some people. I think I was number 12 in the comedy charts. past week. So thank,

thank. These plugs are just really something else. Yeah. He's traced the tone. Yeah. So anyways, yeah, do that. Listen to Gravy Baby,

weekly skews, all the other shit that we have going. Also, Hollywood Hellscapes, I'm the co-host of the new Dalit spinoff, Hollywood Hellscapes. I'm told that it is about to get its wide release for right now.

It's just on their Patreon. But it's really fun. It's the Dalup format, but we talk about Hollywood shit. So it's awesome. Do that. And thank you all for listening to the Well Red Show. We love to stick around longer, but we got to go.

Attune in next. No, we can. Oh. Wow. Go back through the archives. They were beak and blue. Thank you. God bless you.

Good night and skew. Park. Fuck you, Drew. Skoo. That's what you did there. All right. Bye. Bye.

They're the never sex they care way too much but don't give a fun. They're the next that makes some people upset, but they got three big old bigs that you can suck.