wellRED podcast - George Washington is the Literal Dollar General

Episode Date: May 13, 2020

For ep. 169 (nice), GutterBumpkin himself DJ DJ Lewis joins us this week to talk about starting work at the Dollar General right as COVID hit, and the many ways it has made folk's red come out. We also discuss Vapor Wave (a music genre/aesthetic, not a new drug) and Drew shares his theory on why white people suck - which Trae immediately points out is accidentally racist. It's a good episode. Dig it. Follow DJ @gutterbumpkin. If you have any info on the whereabouts of the Cho, please call 1-800-FINDCHO

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion. Because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie. I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say. Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year?

Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better. and it's called Rocket Money.

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I used Rocket Money and realized that I had apparently been paying for two different language learning services that I just wasn't using. So I was like, I should know Spanish. I'll learn Spanish. and I've just been paying to learn Spanish without practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that. Also, a fun one, I'd said it before,

but I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friend's faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies. You know, those weren't a little like the Q-ball-looking twin fellas. Yeah, so that was money.

What was that a reply gift for? Just when I did something stupid. Something fat, I think, and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for it and forgotten. If it wasn't for Rocket Money, I never would have even figured it out. So shout out to them.

They help. If you're money dumb like me, Rocket Money can help. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney. dot com slash well read today that's rocket money.com slash well r e d rocketmoney.com slash well read and we thank them for sponsoring this episode of the podcast they're the what is up everybody it is your boy the Drew um yeah I'm doing the podcast this week

Corey is otherwise disposed uh we'll be talking to him about that next week no doubt. But before we get started, just letting y'all know we got DJ on the podcast this week. It's a great episode. Just want to plug a few dates. You go to well-readcom.

That's W-E-L-L-R-E-D comedy.com. For those dates, we're going to be in Kalamazoo on May 32nd. We are going to, it looks like New York City. We're going to play the Boom Boom Room. looks like that's on May 56th. We're going to be in Tuscaloosa. The day Alabama plays Auburn doing a show at Lucky's Bar and Grill

that's right downtown. It's owned by Lucky. He has three eyes. And we're also going to be, it looks like in April of next year, we're going to be playing the Super Bowl. So go ahead and get tickets to that right now, get tickets to the Super Bowl. We'll be doing the halftime show.

Chiefs are going to win again. You can also buy our book, The Little Redneck Manifesto, Dragon Dixie out of the dark, and join our newsletter. You can go in there and join our newsletter. You get updates from us. Yeah, it's a good time. This section of the podcast is sponsored today by Futility and Hope. Futility and Hope.

How can I feel both these at the same time? It's probably the marijuana. Futility and Hope. So what I was about to say is for people that are listed, well, shit, first of all, we're joined today by a long time buddy, senior good buddy of the podcast, DJ Lewis. Senior good buddy, DJ Lewis, you guys know him, you love him. He's sitting in for the show today. We are showless.

And so DJ's filling in. And when he sat, so when we started up, because we're on Zoom, DJ has this like polygonal sunset like picture behind him. And so as soon as it popped up, I said, I like that vapor wave horizon. And he was like, what? And so I shared my screen and I just typed vapor wave into Google. And what was weird to me,

because the reason I said vapor wave horizon was because I thought vapor wave was just sort of that like 80s aesthetic and that the horizon was a secondary part of it. I'm going to share my screen again with y'all right now. Literally, if you just type in vapor wave alone, look how many horizons there are. It's a very common motif, I guess. I wonder if the waves are,

or have something to do with the, like, I wonder if that genre is specifically for sunrises. But if you don't know at all, what the fuck I'm talking about, if you've ever seen the Ryan Gosling movie Drive, it's that. The music and aesthetic and everything of that is basically what it is. It's like 80s synth Tron

type shit and some of it hits for me, some of it don't. I was telling you all my personal favorite album from that genre I found is by a band called Gunship and it's their title album and it hits for me. But that's all that was. I will definitely check it out. I've been listening

to a lot of like 1980s Italian horror uh, soundtracks like Dario Argento. He's got like all these fucking crazy like it's weird funk mixed with uh

I fuck for a yeah man I mean he's he's pretty he's pretty awesome man and that whole Italian horror theme song fucking soundtrack thing it's it's pretty wild

it's pretty wild I've been digging it here later so you're talking about original scores right like yeah yeah I fuck with movie scores sometimes too but I'm I normally go for the more like a chilled ones,

not to like, you know, creepy, uh, make your bones rattle type of shit in it. You know, that's a weird thing about it. So like you take like a beetle juice from, uh, uh, um,

uh, is a great is a fantastic score. Right. But what these horror movies, it's not even, it's not even what you think that it is. It's just like these crazy funk bass lines with like these weird scent. Like it's wow.

It's really crazy. Yeah. DJ, I was wanting to ask you about since you're here, you're kind of like, if we can talk about as much or as little of this as you want to, but like, I don't know if people know, but you're sort of on the front lines, in my opinion, of this pandemic situation because you worked down there at the, let's say it's, like a,

I'm trying to think of how to say it without, you know, it's one of those stores where everything is somewhere around 100 cents. Yeah, yeah. Except it's not, it's not. Yeah, a store, generally, generally a dollar at this store. Imagine if George Washington was in the army. Right. So, anyway, you work at one of them.

So like that. Holy shit. George Washington is the Dollar General. Yeah. He was literally a general and he's on the, well, my, I'm sorry, my fucking mind is blown. Also, Trey, we say where DJ works all the time in our podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Well, I just, you know, I didn't know what all kind of shit we was about to get into

because I'm just wondering if you got. You got to make some crazy shit. Right, yeah. Before you get into this real quick, did y'all know that George Washington was literally the dollar general? or do you all this I'm not fuck about I'm 100% for it

I like that the dollar general I'm not going to lie that's never occurred to me at all and I don't think this is what you're saying that is wild

but like you're not they don't I don't think they I'm sure somebody in some meeting has brought it up but I don't think that's what they were going for

are you shitting me Trey DJ tell them about the Illuminati and the triangles and the eyeballs on a dollar bill and now we know where they're doing their fucking meetings at

yeah but you would they would have some kind of a logo situation going. They take advantage of that. They capitalize on. Right. I forgot about it.

It's the same way with them UFOs, man. Oh, yeah. And UFOs. UFO events happen in places where they have exclusively Dollar General's for shopping. That is true. Everybody knows that. Yeah, I'll keep forgetting about the recent bombshell

that was dropped on us in the group chat about Dollar General being a forerunner of the like global shadow government and the money elites at the very top who are secretly pulling the streets. Right. I will tell. Morning you, Trey, he came back and apologized to DJ so he don't want to make fun of him,

which I very much respect. Yeah, yeah, right. I mean, me too. But that's the type of thing. So that's referring to a story. DJ told us in a group chat. But apparently shit gets wild. at the DG.

I know that's hard to believe. But like, you know, shit ain't like the, the DG doesn't have the calmness of waters during peacetime, you know, or normal time. But at times of, you know,

panic and tumult, tumult, how how do you say that word? I mean, what sucks about this next segment? We can't live up down the money of the premises in my mind. Right, right.

So, but anyway, so yeah, DJ, just since you're on here today, I was just wondering what of that you could share with the listeners, like some of your frontline experiences there. Well, it's all been a really wild, like, especially for personally, it's like it's been a very wild journey, man. And the main thing is like, you know, I got a job there right before all this shit happened. And then like literally like the week before. And so I was tossed into this maniacal.

Just this fucking, this absolute like frenzy of, oh, just the red assery, number one. Because like even before it hit America, people were coming in there talking about it. Like before all the like shut down and stuff so that like, every single, you know, Bubba and everybody had an opinion about it. Right. From 5G to like the Chinese and trying to start a war and like there's all it says shit so like when it hit.

I love that with the spectrum. Anywhere from the Chinese cause 5G to the Chinese were starting a war, these rednecks were all. Oh, my way. It was China. Like there's a lot of, there's a lot of that. which is really weird because you don't really know how to talk to somebody who's assaulting you with that kind of information.

You just kind of want to be like, can I help you in any other way? Well, yeah. So that's actually... Being friends with you, DJ, Tray and I have no experience with an individual assaulting us with information we can. That's what, that's kind of what I'm wondering is like, because apparently these people are talking directly, you about this and it's sort of how like you know how like gaydar is a thing or how i feel like

i feel like you know uh people that fuck with drugs have kind of a nose for other people that fuck with drugs yeah yeah are you like are you like are you one of these people for like you know conspiracy theorists and wild ass motherfuckers like they see you and they're like this guy's in tune with it yeah oh yeah oh yeah exactly i've been in a couple of just being like, okay, buddy, we just need to chill. Like, we need to separate. Like, we need to just, like, have a moment because I don't know what the fuck you're talking.

Like, you know, I'm not there where you are, sir. Even though I am where you are, the guy with all the tattoos, that the dog, General, he knows what the fuck's going on. I'm going down there and clap him with these goddamn my deal. And it's just like, oh, fuck, no, babe. I don't want to peel behind the curtain, but I need to know. You knew the answer to that.

you just wanted it to hit, right? Or is there somebody you that wondered if motherfuckers not doing that? No, no, yeah. I just thought it was a funny, you know, whatever. Well, we've talked about how with our accent and our teeth, we get racist jokes and stuff like that. And I get, at our shows,

I get people who want to talk to me about real dark stuff, which I totally understand. I can't think of anything DJ wouldn't get except maybe parenting questions. Like, I can't think of any genre of I'm trapping you to talk about this conversation that DJ couldn't get. Buddhism, white supremacy, world peace, the next war, like anybody could look at him who's into trapping people in conversations and go, I bet he's into it. I bet even like new age Christians could be like that's a hipster preacher. Yeah.

I can't tell you how many times I've been. offered like a tattoo in somebody's trailer like it's really weird it's fucking weird dude it's weird it's weird because i'm just there like and like here's the whole thing is like i'm trying to like really hard like to work on myself since i take it this time to like meditate and like do yoga in the morning and like but then i go in here with my head wide open like you know what i'm saying and like my lens changes from one and like the like the like the like the dollar general lens is not very sanitary like when you see through that you know what i'm saying it's going to be a very dirty cluster of like and so you got to fix so you're like you got to be like whoa whoa whoa

how do i how do i how do i how do i even how do i even say what the fuck is going on here and to be like at the edge of the pandemic in a rural area at the dollar general it's been very fucking like it's crazy because like they gave everybody like a dollar raise for a which I thought was just adorable. You know what I'm saying? I was like, oh, how cute. You know what I mean? And then we had all these incidents back to back to back to back to back. Which like at the year recently has like all of our management's been fired and like left.

So like that's wild as fuck. And, like, so there's been, like, messages, changes and, like, craziness. And, like, it's weird to see how there's, like, this one group of people who are, like, all about wearing their masks, all about wearing the gloves. Yeah. And it's, it's not, it does get political. It is kind of a political statement to do that. And that's weird. It's a political statement for Dre to wear her scrubs, her from the Animal Clinic, into, like, the store or something.

People get weird about that. It's a weird thing. But, no, that's, do you, do y'all have rules about a mask or get or anything when you're working? Right. You know, we don't. We don't, but, but I, but I do personally. Yeah. To do that.

And like, you can see the other people who are also wearing masks and stuff. And, and they're very much like, like this. Whereas like, you know, throwing up deuses and being like, hey, yeah, we're on the same team here. Whereas the other people who aren't wearing masks are kind of just like, they feel weird and they get weird around you. You know what I mean? It's a very, it's like, well, here's some things that I've heard anecdotally about this whole dynamic, which is weird. I mean, it's not weird because I totally, I have no trouble buying all of it. But, you know, me and Drew living out here in L.A., and it's like they pass some temporary resolution.

thing or whatever that it's illegal to you can't go in any place of business if you don't have a mask on they're supposed to turn you away and I saw I've so everybody out here is always wearing a mask all the time because it's like the law now but I have seen I went into a CVS shortly after that happened there was this old man in there standing at the door and I don't know what was happening when I first walked in but he walked but he was standing there yelling at him like he was like god damn I don't know where to find them I don't have any I don't know where to find them what want me to fucking do? And, and, and they were like, sorry.

They were like, sir, I don't know what to tell you. You know, you just can't be in here without, and I just walked on past and went back to, you know, the liquor aisle or whatever. When I came back, apparently, I guess they had like CVS, a CVS supporter or somebody had, like, given him a mask. Right. And now he had a mask on and was now standing there, like, super apologetically. like, he's like, listen, you know, I just don't, I didn't have a mad.

Like, it was so weird. I just didn't, I feel like that was, it was not what I expected at all. Like from, when I walked in and saw it and I was like, well, I don't know how this is about to go. This old motherfucker's about to be escorted out. And it's, and it's going to be some shit. But he was, because he's screaming about how like, I don't know where to get a mask. And that just sounds like a crazy asshole, but then they gave him a mask. and he was like, thank you.

I'm better. I think part of that is where we're from. You saw that situation and said, damn, this is third gear. He's about to go to overdrive. Right. But he was already in overdrive. Right.

But anyway, I said that on and say, that's the only like mask-related drama that I have witnessed at all. But the anecdotal shit I was talking about is I've heard from people back home like my buddy Pornow, I brought up Pornow on the podcast before. He told me that he got like, he got shit talked at the gas station for having a mask on by some old red-ass bitch, some Tammy, you know, saw Porno pumping gas with a mask on and just,

like, yeah, right, he didn't look at or address her in any way. She came up to him like, you know, are you fucking kidding me? You're playing into this bullshit like she knows him or something. You know, all because. I just sprayed her with that fucking. gas hose. Right. And then my,

a friend of mine who I know from like, he was in my acting class out here, but he's a committee down here from Texas, but he was living in L.A. But in the middle of all this, like last week, him and his wife, because they had, it was going to happen, it has nothing to do with the pandemic. They moved to Nashville, actually.

So they were driving, driving to Nashville to move there after living in L.A. for years. And they stopped at their hometown. And they act, Odessa, Texas. It's their hometown. They stopped there the day that, did y'all say that story from Odessa, Texas where that lady tried to open up that trailer bar and she hired a bunch of fucking mall ninja mercenaries.

No. Okay. All right. Hold up. So I keep diverging here, but it's a wild time. Wild shit's going on. Anyway, my buddy's on the road. He stops in Texas.

He's driving on his way to Tennessee. And he was texting me about how, like, how crazy it is going from L.A. to where, like, you were. required to wear a mask and everyone's got one on and it's like not even questioned to go into these places where like people look at you funny or act like you're an asshole or something if you have a mask on is the reason I brought it up but since you all haven't heard that Odessa story what happened was because this is a this is a study in rad assery right here and you know how red asses do with studies it didn't turn out of them um so what had happened was

this lady in Odessa, Texas said, fuck it. And like, publicly, you know, because how else does the redneck say fuck it, but publicly. Like, on the, her, she owned a bar, but it showed a picture of the bar. It's literally a bar in a single wide trailer, you know, not the most upscale establishment. She got on the bar's Facebook page and was like,

fuck this shit, I'm opening the bar. I got family to feed. People have the right. This is America, yada, yada. I'm reopening the bar. And as part of that, she, like, I said, Like, I don't know if what the compensation was or what, but she, like, hired, like, armed mercenaries. And people aren't watching. I'm making the air quotes right now because these, they're all, like I said, they were like mall ninjas,

mall ninja, y'all, kind of motherfuckers, you know the tight, fat, dumb, and don't wear. Yeah, those, those guys, she hired, like, three of those guys to come and protect her as she reopened the bar. like explicitly protect her from the authorities because this is illegal for her to do this. But she's saying she's, yeah, well, they're still under a lockdown order there. Bars can't be open. So it's illegal for her to reopen, but she's saying, fuck the law. I'm a reopen anyway. And I've hired some protection to keep the authorities from, you know, doing anything about it.

And she stated all this publicly. And then the day comes she reopens for business. These guys are standing outside. and the fucking cops just show up and just arrest them all and shut the bar down immediately. Like, of course they didn't do anything. Right. Yeah.

That's the thing with these fucking people. It's like they, like, they act like that's why they're doing this. It's for this exact scenario to stand up against, like, unjust tyranny or whatever. But then they just turn around, put their hands behind their back against the fucking car and leave it. Like, everybody knew that's what they were going to do. Of course, that's what that is. Yes, of course. Okay, I agree with the point y'all are making,

but I would not have been surprised if the end of that story, Trey, was, so anyway, two of the old boys got shot. The other one shot himself trying to get his gun out. Well, they weren't black. If they were black, they would have been shot. And they wouldn't have showed up without wanting to shoot. See, that's the whole thing. There's a no difference between this impotence.

I don't know I'm saying that there's a, very impotent threat with these people that I think the government's, I mean, I feel it. Like, if I'm out in public and somebody's got a bazooka, listen, let me tell you something. Like, before you even, like, where are your rockets, number one? You just got like a bazooka, but no rockets like that. And that's a lot to get. So, like, that's the dumbest fucking, like, that's the dumbest thing you could possibly do. You get throwing at somebody?

What the fuck's wrong with you? I mean, like, if they're strong, they could beat you. I guess, but that's so fucking funny. I hadn't even thought of that. You just got a... Where are you got your boots? Yeah, yeah, dude, yeah. I mean, that's a first thing that I thought of

when I seen it was like, okay, yeah, that's all nice and everything, but who are you... You're just like five minutes to get ready? Yeah, exactly. That's exactly. And by that time, it's all over with. So it's like, you guys, I mean, I don't understand it all.

I'm trying so hard. to understand it. I mean, I am going through, like, daily, like, okay, these people are scared, they're weak, whatever, trying to come up with things to figure out, like, how I can rationalize this kind of behavior in my head. And it's just, it's so irrational and so dumb that there's just no, there's no figuring it out. And I think what you were saying is a really good point, what you brought up, because like what else is going to happen to these people? They're going to get locked up. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Does the county police or like whoever, do they want to put them in jail? Like they don't really want to have to lock up 50, fucking 100 people and put them off, like, and create a worse environment for themselves because if they have corona, if these people are infected, then all the jailers, all the people, all the, you know, all these people are now. subject to the disease. You know what I'm saying? And now they're being exposed to it.

So it's like, God, just stop being stupid. Right. And it'll be fine. But like I just, I don't feel like anybody really feels like there's as much of a threat as those people feel like they are. Yeah. No, absolutely. I also was talking to Uncle Tim about it.

He lives in Salina. Meemaw is not step foot onto the front porch, even since all this started, which is good because Maimon is 81 years old. And Uncle Tim has pre-existing conditions. And Uncle Tim is fucking 60, let's see, what, 60, whatever. He's almost 60 years old. What, fuck, sorry, I know it doesn't matter. They're both at risk.

They're both, you know, old, old enough for just to be a real big deal. And Uncle Tim has to do all the shopping and shit for Ma Ma Ma Ma'a. and everything because she just only leave the house. And he wears gloves and a mask and all that stuff. And he's just talking about everywhere he goes. And Salina, half the other people there, more than half, are not. And look at him like he's an idiot and how much it pisses him off because it's like...

It would be so funny if that was the thing that finally got Uncle Tim run off from Salina. Right. Yeah, yeah. Been openly great. He's in the 70s through all his administrations and the Trump ear. And then like, this motherfucker's wearing a mask? Get him out of this town. why can't you just be free and be who you are, Tim?

Yeah. Why don't you go to work and be free? That's so fucking so... But he's like really upset by the whole thing and it, you know, pisses me off too because it's like that's why the, like, the mask are mostly, it works both ways,

but the mask are mostly about protecting, like, other people. So like these people are, you know, putting him further at risk, even though he's doing everything that he personally can about it. And not only are they doing that, but like they don't give a fuck. And not only do they not give a fuck, they think he's a dumbass for caring about it.

And so it's like, yeah, of course that's going to really, really piss you out. Like, that sucks, you know, sucks to have to deal with that. The thing about it is that it hasn't hit the rural areas. Well, one part of stuff in this. One point about that, because as usual, our people, somewhat deservedly so, are taking the brunt of the blame slash fodder for...

I mean, they had fucking protest in Michigan that was the first one I saw. And I saw people literally making like Southern accent type jokes about Michigan people. And that's, again, you know, it's happening. But I've seen a few videos of people walking through Boston. Boston allowed some bars to open up.

They were packed immediately out. And there's like video. and people walking by with their camera laughing, and these dudes in fucking Brady T-shirts and gronk shirts, calling them F-bombs in the most Boston. Like, it's not funny, but it is so goddamn funny. It's just a how. It's very Boston in it.

Yeah, it's like, it's whatever their version of red is. But he was like, but he was like, I fuck your mother. He was like, there's like more than one. It's, so it's not just a rural thing. I just want to say that. No. There was a big one in Colorado, too, around that same time, in Denver. because part of it went viral because a nurse,

a male nurse at a hospital in Denver, like counter-protested and some Tammy was screaming until she was red in the face at him about, you know, not being an American and to fuck off or whatever. And that video got passed around and that was in Denver, Colorado. So I mean, yeah, like, you know,

we all know that these people are everywhere. Well, I got a quick story about a southern rural one, just real quick. my niece Jesse, who is the one, if you guys listen to the album, it's the one with the baby on her hip, who the preacher wouldn't let her sit there. Jesse and my brother-in-law were fighting. He is very freedom, America.

I mean, it's almost unbelievable how consistently he waits to see what that side of it feels, and then he has the strongest opinion in the world about it. His name is Aaron, and Andy just texted me a screen. screenshot of Jesse calling him Karen, but spelling it Karen like Kay Aaron. And I just, I'm a little stone, but it fucking murdered me. And you probably have to know my family, but like Jesse probably weighs 100 pounds and cusses everybody out.

And Aaron is, uh, drives a huge truck that has a bumper sticker that literally says, uh, my carbon footprint is huge. So, um, anyway, I just, I just wanted to tell you all that. Is that her dad? her uncle. Okay, right. Well, yeah, no. Karen, that's good.

That is good. Does it. Yeah, I like the Karen. The K-A-R. That's crazy, man. That's crazy, though, man. It's crazy that it's been, like, of course, like,

who really knows what the fuck is going on? I don't think anybody really does. I mean, like, it's mutated 100,000 times. It's become a kill as, and can't. But I think like at the end of the day, what you got to say is like, I'm going to wear gloves in a mask and I'm going to be as respectful to my fellow human as as possible. And that's like the end of the story. That's like, that's it.

Yeah, overreaction. It doesn't have to be anything more than that. Yeah, overreaction is the move. I mean, yeah. I mean, and even, I mean, and you can get cool and you can get cool masks and stuff too. So like, who doesn't want to wear a mask in public? Yeah, and I mean, like, you could get. cool stuff.

You could, you know, bedazz and let you do. Sidney's. Yeah, well, I mean, on that note, that's what Katie is spending every waking hour doing right now. My wife, she's been sewing masks for people for weeks. And, like, literally all goddamn day long, which, you know, I mean, good for her. Also, it's keeping her busy, I guess. But, yeah, she's got, she makes hers out of all kinds of different fabric and materials and stuff. you know, from Avengers to Tinkerbell to just monkeys and shit.

So, you know, you could get a mask that hit. Why not? It's not that big of a deal. I mean, like, while I'm working and, man, we fucking, we fucking work. Now, people wouldn't realize, like, the cluster fuck that's gone on. And, like, when we go in, it's, it's, we go, like, it's insane, okay? And, uh, and on a daily basis, different, different levels of insanity. but anyways, if I could just keep a mask and gloves on

and it may no big deal, then I don't, while I'm working, then whatever the hour at most that you spend in a store leisurely, taking things from the shelf, like, this isn't even, like, whatever a person's ideals about freedom are and liberty, now that's what freaks me out.

Like, what do you think liberty is? what exactly are you fighting for what exactly are you protesting for it's wild because it's wild son it's wild because i don't know what to do with myself if i'm not getting a haircut on wednesday and going to church on sunday and i can't go you know like what like the inability to handle any inconvenience is so right right telling and also shocking I mean, DJ, we were talking out on the podcast on the end of the abyskit, and you were saying like these people seem weak, but you were saying like you kind of feel bad coming to that conclusion.

But it is a type of weakness. Is it not? I mean, I guess it's a type of weakness if you immediately without reading into it, without putting any thought into what is being said, if you immediately go, I'll do whatever the government tells me. I'll put a mask on and stay home. Like, that's a type of weakness, I suppose, too. But it's such blatant weakness to be out there screaming

at a nurse about your haircut. You are, you have gone past whatever rational, whatever kind of rational, emotional, whatever, whatever is going on in your life that you can't handle this very minor. And like, all you have to do is be at home, plant some flowers, read a book. And it's like you're, like,

have sex with your partner. Dude, yeah, yeah. I mean, like there's so many different things. that you can do that you're free to do. Well, DJ, speaking of having sex with your partner. Yeah. Did you know that right now,

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well read for free shipping. We thank Magic Spoon for sponsoring the podcast. All right, back to it. We was talking in a lot of ways about things you could do instead of acting like an asshole during the pandemic, which is how we got on having sex and eating cereal. But just some things I've been doing. I've been growing my beard out a little bit,

my neck's itchy, but I have something to, you know, measure my progress. I've been reading this book DJ told me about. Peace is every step, and it's got me meditating. Also, me and Annie have a new game. When we fart out loud, which during quarantine, is about three times every hour on the hour, you've got a karate shop or you get punched.

So if you fart out loud, you got a karate chop. But if you karate chop and it turns out to be a silent one or you shit yourself, you also get punched. Did y'all overplay doorknob, safety and doorknob or anything like that back in the day? This is, yeah, Chinese doorknob. I think you're on to something there, dude. You need to spread that around the youth back of Morgan County. Yeah, right.

But, yeah, DJ, you know what we were talking about safety and doorknob? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, DJ played that when he was in a high school prison too. Yeah. There was a game. Dude, you want to hear about that thing people used to do, people in prison? I'm not certain how to answer that, to be honest with you. Never mind, yeah.

I'm not saying no. I'm not going to go into it. Don't tease us. Well, because I was going to tell a very whimsical story about the farting game. Yeah. Yeah. So my buddy James Vane, who we've had on the podcast before, who's a gigantic U.S. Marine and actor out here in L.A., who's from Salina.

He's five years older than us. I was best friends with his younger brother, who's now a fucking nuclear physicist. And so this story about a. fat child farting, the fat child is now a nuclear physicist and PhD. So just keep that right. So we're all, we're all hanging out at the Baines house. And it's like me and my buddies who were all like 12ish, probably 12 or 13. And James, who's 17 or 18 and just him, none of his friends. So he's just, he's kind of like having to chaperone us little fat idiots, right? And that don't hit, obviously. but we were real big in the safety and doorknob at the time,

which if anybody's listening, doesn't know what we're talking about. It's like Drew described his and Andy's game. It's just when you fart, you have to say safety. If you don't say safety, then you can be, you open yourself up to being physically abused by your friends. They can start punching you if you don't say safety. And the only way to get them to stop is by touching a doorknob. So to protect yourself, you either say safety or run and touch a doorknob

after you fart, otherwise you get whooped on. And it's just a, you know, classic game for the kids. And we were real into it at the time. So we're just all just farting our asses off. And at one point, James finally, and we're seasoned, we're seasoned vets at this point. So like every time anybody farts, we say safety immediately.

Like nobody's getting caught slipping at all. Right. And so effectively, we're just all sitting there, just farting for the sake of it, which, you know, is fine. But it was a lot in a compact area in a short amount of time. So at one point James stands up, he had enough. And he was like, he's like, all right, you little motherfuckers, listen, house rules. Safety's over.

No more safety. I don't give a fuck. You're not allowed to say safety. The next little asshole that farts in this room, I'm going to fucking pummel you until you touch a goddamn doorknob. I don't give me. He's like, this shit. He's like, this whole room smells like an ass.

This has got to stop, right? As he's saying this, we're all just sitting there like, okay, you know, whatever. His little brother, my buddy Jason, the now nuclear physicist, like, rolls back, rolls back on the floor onto his back and grabs his thighs and puts his, like, legs up in the air, you know, so he's, like, got his butthole pointed, like, upward, right? And he's like, he does that. He's like, hey, Jack. James and he's like fucking with him.

It's clear that he's like, oh, I'm going to fart. I'm going to fart, James. But he's just like just joking around. James like gets over him. So he's in this, like, you know, vulnerable position laying there. And James is standing over him with his fist right back. And he's like, he's like, I swear to God, I swear to God, I dare you to fart right now. I swear to God, you little asshole or whatever.

And Jason's like, oh, James, I'm going to fart. James, I'm going to fart. but again, you can tell he's just like, fucking with him not going to. And then he, like, farted on accident. Like, he's like, he's like, he's like, oh, yeah, but if he goes, burr. And immediately his eyes got as big as dinner pants.

He was like, oh, oh. And James just, like, jumps on him and starts, you know, punching him in the shoulder or whatever. And Jason's like, like, Jason's trying to scramble to a doorknob. And James, like, pulling him back by his fucking underwear, giving him wedgies and all that shit. And he's just freaking out because, like,

You know, he just, he flew too close to the, to the gas giant that is the sun, you know. And he got. He flew too close to the sun, chip. Man, I was wondering how marketable, like, some, like, some kind of food that specifically makes you fart. But it tastes it. Not like beans or, like, milk or whatever, but, like, if you had some, like, hearty, farty chicken jerky or something like that, that would, like, that would, like, brew a big old fart. Like, you knew you were going to fart after you. it was going to be massive.

Like how, and I think that that would kill with the, with the younger crowd. I'm surprised that I'm like that don't exist. I'm not going to lie. Guys, today's podcast is brought to you by Hardy Farty Chicken jerky. Chicken jerky.

Party party.com right now, forward slash, well fed and get your free bag of Hardy Farty today. Yeah. I think you that. You got to call it like hearty farty chicken party. And it's like a bag. Yeah.

Oh, there you go. It's a bag of, you know, it is your cheese. Party, Farty Chicken Party. But it's like different flavors in there. You know what I mean? Different flavors that you get different smells out of it, too. But in the same bag, you know what I mean? Yeah.

It's all in the same bag, but it's a bunch of different flavors because that's the party part. So you call it. That's marketable. You can have a big party chicken party. Yeah, you're on to something there. I think party party would be the spokesman, my new character. That's speaking of that reminds me to something I want to talk about from last week. if you listen last week, you heard towards the end that I retweeted or I stole Carrie Corey's joke as a bit for the podcast.

It was the joke that had been stolen so many times. And we sat on here what would happen or all these things will happen, but what will be the most prominent? We said, would our fans kind of blow the game by being like, oh, ha ha, we know what you're doing. DJ, if you don't know, do you know that Corey had that tweet that went super viral? and everybody stole it. I'm kind of familiar. Yeah, kind of, yeah. So he had this picture.

It's about the church, the church shit. Yeah, okay. So he did that. It went super viral. Tosh.0, an intern, somebody there, stole it. I was shitting on everybody who was stealing it. And then we talked about that on the podcast last week, and I said, I'm going to steal it right now and see what happens.

And then Corey goes, I hope it goes viral again. And then I said, I hope people shit on me. The latter two, is what happened. It went super fucking viral. Like, I'm a borderline ashamed to say, I think it's my second most successful tweet of all time.

Oh, really? Which is crazy because, as Corey pointed out, half a million people or more. That's how many liked it. So two million people saw it. At least, yeah. But then, you know,

and I guess numbers-wise, this actually isn't that crazy. Like 10,000 saw it on mine before I deleted it. And, man, I got shit on, which genuinely made me feel good. Yeah, right. No, you said, yeah, right, exactly. To keep the bit going, and when people would shit on me, I would troll them back. I was telling everybody it was my church, so it don't count.

And one lady got so mad at me, she eventually blocked me. I don't remember what else she called me. I wish I'd have a screen capped it. But I do, I let it go too far with her because, like, well, eventually I would tell people who was shitting on me that it was just a meta-joke, and then I would tell them to. But it got me thinking about like, you know, because Corey was saying it was stolen like a hundred times at least that he knows of. But it didn't go viral every time. And you know, you can't control.

I mean, you can control. It's got to be good content. I'm not trying to take anything away from how good the content is. But I don't know, Trey, I've heard you say before that you purposely titled your video with liberal redneck in it because that phrase alone would make, would draw eyes. Now, how good the videos were I realized kept people. people there. Yeah, just, yeah, and when I say that, I just mean like the people that follow me already, like, because I, a lot of people follow me, they, a lot of people that follow me, they literally only want to see the portraits as I've come to call them from me. Like, that's

the only thing they want me to do, which is fine, because I'm not going to only do that, but, so whatever, but like, so the reason I say that is, I've all, the, the port, if video is a Portrant or portraitant. The conversation we were talking about is we did a sketch, but to me that sketch, like that was just a little experimental thing because it, like, covered all the same bases that I would have covered in a,

just a rant about that subject, which the subject was pro. The sketch that we all did. Oh, you put a little redneck in that. I was talking about it. That's the conversation that you're referencing. I asked you all for permission. No, no, I was talking about the originals.

Well, it's the reason I do it for all of them is what I'm saying, like, because I want people to know my thought process is. I want people who already follow me to know this is one of those videos specifically, which is what I like from him. So I'm definitely going to watch this. I don't know how much that actually happens or whatever, but that's why. But I'm saying, hold on. I'm saying that's him smart to me.

Yeah, no, that's definitely smart. I'm saying the very first one. Oh, the very first one. You told me, maybe you don't remember, you told me like you put liberal redneck in it. Yeah. You know, like people would see what? Oh, right. Yeah.

Okay. I thought you're, yes. Right. The very, very first one. Yeah. And dude, like, I don't, I mean, I'll stand by that for sure. I wouldn't change a thing about that. Like I, like, I did.

I know, I know that when that very first one was happening, that there were people who were like liberal. What? and they clicked on it like just for that reason. So I know that it was effective in that way. Well, we were talking with Corey about what it was like, you know, for that to happen. And I wish he was here. We can talk about why he isn't momentarily, if you guys want. It's such a strange thing.

You can't take anything away from someone and I wouldn't want to when they go viral. Because unless the Internet's laughing at them, you made good content. But how to get it started. The reason I'm bringing this up is I had a stand-up clip, not go viral, but it's the best stand-up clip I've ever had. And it's probably my most successful video on Twitter, maybe my second most. And I titled it, sincerely while stoned, just being dumb,

comedian destroys Charleston because it's about the Charleston accent. Yeah. And I told you, I think, Trey, the next line in the video after it ends is they hate that joke in Charleston, but I accidentally edited it out. Like I just, I just happened to stop the video right before I say it. I think the dumber you name a video. Yeah. Dude, clickbait, clickbait is like a thing for a reason. You know what I mean? Like it, like it works. You just got it what I want to say. Let me say it better. Let me say it better and not dumb. Clickbait is a thing for a reason. I know that. Clickbait is evolving. Like in my head, clickbait as a term means,

You won't believe what this famous celebrity said to their priest while fucking this animal. And you're like, but like now it's gotten slightly more subtle. I'm just, maybe everyone's made this point a million times. It's all clickbait now. Yeah. Like even the news. It's a hood. I mean, like literally, the goal of the news is to get clicks.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, they have to. I don't know. Some, like, there's definitely places that are way more egregious about it for sure. I think that most people, when they think clickbait, think the same thing that you said just a minute ago. But yeah, there's like, it's employed on some level by almost anybody that's like a online content creator because, yeah, you know, clicks or everything, eyeballs or everything.

Well, to think about because, like, I just wanted to put out a solid joke. And I do feel I did that. but I can't pretend like it got at least some of the attention and at least started getting the traction because I named it a dumb thing. I don't know why, but that's wild to me. Yeah, it is why people just don't. I mean, I think people are hit with this constant barrage of shit

all the time when they're online. Well, so the idea being like, it has to be something fucking abrasive and aggressive and in your face to like cut through the noise, I guess. For you to give a fuck about the static. Right, exactly. Because there's all that static here.

You're all like, okay, yeah. I mean, I've seen, I mean, honestly, though, like, it doesn't matter what you're in the video. If I see a dog hanging out with, like, a hippopotamus, like, I'm going to be like, ah, yeah, I'm going to fucking click on the bat. For sure. Yeah, you know what I'm saying?

I do know what you're saying. I agree with everything you said. I guess the part where I seemingly depart from many on the internet is because of that, there's no way in hell I'm clicking on comedian destroys Charleston. Yeah, I'm not either. Right. I wouldn't either. Straight up.

Yeah. No, I agree. I agree. I did it almost like in disgust of myself for putting content out, DJ. Like, I do you know. I get it. I hear it. Maybe I get it.

I get it. I know exactly what you're saying. And it worked. Yeah. And again, the joke's great. I stand by. It's short. It's got a good point.

But like, I don't know why you're making that face at me, DJ. I feel on side of icky? You feel icky? I don't know. I really don't because the content's good. I feel no ickiness about that at all. I just am more perplexed by it, I guess, than I should be. It clearly makes sense to you guys.

you actually touched on an adjacent subject that I think is while DJ did when you were talking about the dog and the hippo video it's like that's the other thing if you're trying to make shit and put it on the internet funny I'm talking specifically about funny shit it's like you're competing against goddamn big fat fucking cats and like and like dumb ass drunk people falling off of stuff and shit like that you know

And it's like, dude, you can't, you cannot. Nothing can compete with that, man. Nothing. Trey, I think I talked with you about this bit. I used to have a bit, man, this is a while ago. When I first knew New York, me and you would get high and talk on the phone. I can't believe any of that's true except me getting high. About, like, if, I don't remember how I got to it.

It never worked. But it was about like if Van Gogh was alive, like, he wouldn't cut his ear off because that chick broke his heart. He'd cut his ear off because of fucking. cat meme was better than Starry Night. And the reason he cut his ear off is because it is better. It's not because people think he would look at the meme and be

like, that is way better than Starry Night. Look at that fucking cat. Right. Taco Bell nachos are some of the best nachos I've ever had. I have IKEA furniture. The problem with IKEA is not that it's bad furniture.

It's that it's good furniture. Right. Well, like on the subject, of funny video specifically, like the other day I sent y'all in the group chat of video of just an old boy walking up to a very drunk pig and then and then right, see, and then accidentally rolling said pig all the way down a hill and that is the hardest I've laughed at anything in months like that. Right.

What are you going to do? I'm a comic stoker of comedy. I love comedy and stuff. I watch stand up and funny shit all the time. Nothing has fucking cracked me up as hard as that goddamn pig rolling down. What about that hippo? What about that hippo? Shitting.

And it's tail goes in a circle and they put a fan behind it. Yeah. I shared that. Matter of fact, that might have been the genesis of me writing that bit. I was like, this is, I can't do anything. anything better than this. No, I had to, I remember that, that one came out when I still worked at the DOE and I had to get up and close my office door.

I was laughing so hard at that hippo helicopter, helicopter shit farting everywhere. Here within the last year we've had, what's inside your butthole and the guy's guy, you know what I'm saying, written by two, like, free pubescent, girl, like we've never heard. Hey, no, what about, what about, what about, cut that dog? Got put that dog I'm going to get that hard I'm going to put it that dog What are even doing?

All right here's what we're doing Here's what we're doing DJ on end of the biscuit We're being hopeful this month That's our goal All right Here's what we're doing And I generally believe

What I'm about to say It's not just something I pulled out of my ass Which I know I do That's the sunset That the artist is trying to capture We know that we will never Reach the level of humor

that that hippo shit not those fucking white American tourists will get to. But if we, but we can try to grasp the stars. Yeah. Amen, buddy. It's all we can do is try.

You know, the way that the poet cannot feel as good is coming inside a woman you love without a condomone, but he's going to write about it. I literally just got lightheaded when I said that about fainted.

Hey, did y'all see that thing about, oh boy, they had the one arm? I said to all this, that like, buddy had, it was like medieval times, and he had like a goddamn, and they found his arm. Oh, yeah, yeah, that motherfucker. He was wrong.

He was like, he was an OG, son. Oh, what? The first person to write, I'll eat your ass in a poem. Like, what a strand setter. Yeah. Yeah, it was like a medieval knight who lost his hand in battle and replaced it with an iron hand. And then still, after that, went on to do a bunch of other rad shit.

I do remember that. also I don't remember the details. He like kidnapped. He like kidnapped one of the one of the, he like they exiled him and then he came back in to the city and kidnapped like a bunch of monks or some shit like that. And like, he was, wow. He had a robotic arm.

Was he French? He's been, I probably could be. When the show by the time I'm way too into, there's a French commander with an iron hand. Probably. I don't know how many of those that there are. I guarantee that it's not even more than like two or three. Yeah, well, it might have been a trend, you know what I mean?

You all ever think about on the subject of that guy and how wild his story was, and I've never heard of that motherfucker until you shared that the other day, DJ. There's all kinds of stories throughout history of shit like that of just like wild-ass motherfuckers who did some crazy shit, right? And if you all ever thought about how like, you know if you're watching a movie, like an action movie and the hero or a war movie or something, and the hero of said movie just like faces the, absurdly impossible odds and does some ridiculous like superhero shit and comes out the other

side of it and like you watch that and you might think like dude come on that's fucking ridiculous but also people have done shit like that over and over and over throughout human history and the only reason the only reason those stories are ever written down is because of how fucking crazy they are so it's like exactly right it doesn't work 99 times out of 1,000. Right. But you don't hear about those. The win.

Also, I think we're getting better at this. But like when somebody wins and you're on the team that won, you tend to elevate what happened. You know what I mean? Like Norse, again, I'm really in the show Vikings right now, Norse history is full of motherfuckers who went 7,000 and zero in battles in their life. And at some point it's like, man, they fought each other. Like, we know they fought one of them lost that one.

That's actually, that's another thing. Just going through random high thoughts right now, but that's another one I've had is about like those histories that shit like that is based on. They're called histories and treated as histories because like we don't have any, we don't have an alternative. Like that, that's all we got. Like you got like, you know, ancient Greek historians recording these stories and stuff. And that's all we have to go on.

So we call them histories and historical or whatnot. But like, dude, we don't. know if any of that shit fucking happened at all. You know what I'm saying? I mean, I feel like if there's enough stories, we know something happened, right? Right. No, listen, have you

ever heard about, like, seeing somebody read hieroglyphs? Have you ever seen somebody read hieroglyphs? Like a documentary where it's like a Smithsonian documentary, they're like, yeah, we found this ancient tablet. Now, here's where it says these three reeds plus one cat plus one

dog and this weird like, you know what I'm saying, well, that may you know, the or and. But if you take away this read, then it actually means river. So what we know is the Red Sea was actually

split in part, like, you know, you're like, and you're like, how the fuck do you know that? Who told you that information? How did you come?

Like, how? How is that possible? He told me he was a pharaoh. Right, he said to the Pharaoh. I was watching this documentary about Moses going across the Red Sea

and the parting of the Red Sea, right? And that's why I'm getting this. And there was like, see, they misinterpreted the fact that there were three reeds here in the boat in this cat. See, what that means is the Red Sea. It was full of the reeds, and it was the Reed Sea.

It was actually just a swamp. And I was like, dog, come on. Right. Like, why can't it just be a crazy story that we read? Like, what did you know? Like, I don't know. I don't know. It freaks me out.

Hearing about Pharaoh, like, there's only like one or two different, like, Egyptian, like, a hieroglyph. Like, that actually mentions Israel or something. But, like, how do you know? That's what, like, how did you? Yeah, could have just been a dude name Israel, the king didn't like. Or could. Because he was like, no, man, he just got drunk with his buddy, is he? Well, what if somebody was just practicing in their cat drawings?

Yeah, let me. You know what I'm saying? This is like nice cats and a read. And they're doing, like, this is the mother what they're fucking off. The reason he made it into the pyramid is it just had to be that Pharaoh's favorite story. Right. It wouldn't be in here if it wasn't real. It was like bullshit.

He just likes smut. Yeah. He was just fucking off. Speaking of that, do you all know, like in like, like, shit,

what, Mount Vesuvius fucking, uh, God damn it, that ancient Roman town that was like, crushed with lava flow and sort of ultra preserve for a long time and they have all this shit.

Oh, oh, oh, Pompey, Pompeii. Pompeii, Pompeii, right. You know, they have like all these, like,

they've got all these like, uh, basically the equivalent of like, bathroom wall graffiti and stuff all over Pompeii that say things like, you know, like Bacchus is a queer. It's not fucking Marcella sucks dicks and shit like that. It's like, it's so fucking funny, man. But, uh,

queer. Great. Me and DJ, I guess it's mostly mine. I don't want to cast it on it. But we got a history theory. I want to run by you. Okay.

Well, real quick, before we get to that one, I want to add DJ about the hieroglyphics. I don't know shit about actual hieroglyphics, DJ, but my understanding of like translating ancient shit like that or whatever is it's like, it's like decoding something,

like a cryptogram or that type of thing, the way people treat those, meaning like you look for all repeating patterns and how often they occur. And it's like, this same symbol is here over and over again. So that has to be a common letter or device or something like an article like the word the word A or their equivalent of that type of thing. And you do that over and over years and years and comparing all these different symbols

and stuff to where you can make it make sense by like substituting and sort of like decrypting it that way and enough people agree that like, yeah, that checks out. So this is what it is. Isn't that like sort of how that works, you know? That is kind of how it works, but it's wild to me. It's wild to me. It's wild to me that like, like, so like you have like the, the, the, the, oh, what is it? I want to say the Jewish language, but I'm just so wrong.

Aramaic. Well, also, there's... Not Aramaic, but like... What is it? Hebrew. The Hebrew language, where they don't have different,

they don't have, like, vows, and they don't have, like, different letters. So, like, you're adding... You're trying to figure out what the Egyptians were talking about mixed with what the Hebrew

were talking, how they interpreted this language, and then trying to make it into English? Right, but that's where the stuff like... I don't know fucking why. That's why the Rosetta Stone and stuff like that helps, though, where it's pretty obviously the same passage. And you are correct.

And it's like a game of telephone. If the first was Egyptian and then it's Hebrew, then it's Aramaic, and then it's, you know, whatever, old English and then English, you're correct that there's going to be differences in those interpretations. But if we know that this means generally this, and we can extrapolate now, what these other things mean, and it makes sense. I mean, it's a pretty good clue.

Yeah, but does it make sense parting the Red Sea and, like, having fucking snakes turn into fucking... Yeah, it makes sense because that's what the fuck I'd be writing about. I mean, if you lived back then and you had eight kids and seven of them died and the fucking, you know what I mean, the life expects he was 22, why would you write about, oh, the governor took a shit today and we went to war? No, man, you'd be like a snake was talking to me.

I've got to get out of my head here. Fuck, it sucks. So what's this theory? It was also great in Pompeii where they die with like boners and stuff. Yeah. I like that too. I do like that. That's boner at the end of the world.

Oh man, that's the way to go out. DJ wanted to have sex when a tornado came to Georgia and Drake out mad at him, Trey. My theory, Trey, it's about the plague. Me and DJ were talking about the plague. We were talking about the first time it happened, how you didn't have to end.

internet, you didn't have newspapers. Like, you heard about the plague when all your neighbors died. Right. Well, and everybody died who was cool. Everybody who had friends and was hanging out died, and all the fucking hermits and assholes who didn't have no friends survived. And that's why white people ended up sucking. The pandemic got rid of all of our cool people.

That's why we can't dance. Yeah. Yeah, I can buy that. they how did like word like traveled and shit though right you know what I mean like like the town crier yeah yeah but at first they were at the pub they had all they all then they all got it so then they died right you died getting the news and uh the news at first was god hates us because right washing our hands or whatever so you know there's a bridge in the Yeah, yeah.

I'll tell you what the problem is. We've been taking baths, so let's stop doing that and keep hanging out with each other. Did you know? I actually weirdly just read this earlier, and now I read this just on a fucking internet comment. I have not sourced or verified this, but I read a thing that said that Jewish people during that time, they had traditions related to their religion or whatever that required hand washing and things. like that. It had nothing to do with like not getting not getting sick. Yeah, hygiene or whatever.

It was just like religious traditions, but they did it anyway for that reason. And so because of that, they were like relatively, relatively unscathed by the play. Right. But like nobody, nobody understood why. In fact, of course, they thought at the time, they thought that, you know, that it was sorcery. or whatever. You know, the Jews were using all the, you know, fucking shekels to fucking pay the devil to not kill them or whatever the fuck they all thought was going on.

They see what you're saying. The devil doesn't bring harm. They're also washing your feet so you're not dragging camel poop into the bed. You know what I'm saying? It's like, dude, it's like, it's crazy. Well, you're also saying, Trey, that my lighthearted joke

that I was thinking about turning to a bit is something out of Hitler's youth camp apparently. I'm like, you know, all the shitty people survived, like the Jew. I'm saying. Which is not what I was

saying. We're about out of time. Yeah, we are, yeah. All right, boys. We're going to go. I mean, it's You know, it's a can of worms. Well, we'll make him answer when he gets bad.

That's what I think, too. It's more, you know, fair. Yeah, he doesn't need to be defenseless. Like all those people he's around. All right. That's a little teaser for next week, everybody. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

But, yeah, senior good buddy, DJ Lewis. Thanks for sitting in. Love y'all. Thank you all for listening. We'll see you next time. Oh, shit. What? My buddy sent me a free hoodie,

and he wanted me to plug his company. Instead, you're literally shirtless. It's not that one that I was wearing. I haven't gotten it yet. It's sewh hoodie.com. Hoodie spelled with an I. I don't know how you guys spell it. Soh hoodie.com.

Chris is a designer. He designs all kinds of clothes. He's designed backpacks that I've seen like on the subway. He's been like, hey, that's my backpack. And I'm like, no, that's that kid's backpack. And he's like, no, I designed it. He's been on the podcast before when Trey wasn't around. Me and Corey had him on as a guest.

Super cool, super funny guy. He's designed his hoodie that's got a mask built in, and it's pretty sweet. So, you know, especially with the polar vortex that's come through in parts of the world, you might be into that. He's not paying me or anything. He's just my buddy, and I think he's a good dude. Right on.

Right on. Check it out. All right. See y'all. Thank you all for listening to the well-red show. We are so very sorry we were missing our show. Hope you liked it with Tray, DJ, and Drew. and if you didn't like it, buddy, then I guess that's cool. You know, come back next week.

He'll be here.