wellRED podcast - Going Back In Time And Killing Hitler's Dad

Episode Date: July 23, 2025

This week the boys go through several different time traveling scenarios  TraeCrowder.com CoreyRyanForrester.com DrewMorganComedy.com   Go to RocketMoney.com/WellRED to get rid of unwanted subscriptions!

And we thank them for sponsoring the show. Well, no, I'll just go ahead. I mean, look, I'm money dumb. Y'all know that. I've been money dumb ever, since ever, my whole life. And the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb, in my opinion, because used to, you, like, had to write down everything you spent or you wouldn't know nothing. But now you got apps and stuff on your phone.

It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count, the count every month, how much you're spending. A lot of people don't even know how much they spend on a per month basis. I'm not going to lie. I can be one of those people. Like, let me ask you right now. Skewers out, whatnot, sorry, well-read people. People across the ske universe, I should say.

Do you even know how many subscriptions that you actively pay for every month or every year? Do you even know? Do you know how much you spend on takeout or delivery? Getting a paid chauffeur for your chicken low main? Because that's a thing that we do in this society. Do you know how much you spend on that? It's probably more than you think. But now there's an app designed to help you manage your money better.

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practicing any Spanish for, you know, pertinent two years now or something like that. Also, a fun one I'd said it before, but I had a, I got an app, lovely little app where you could, you know, put your friends' faces onto funny reaction gifts and stuff like that. So obviously I got, I got it so I could put Corey's face on those two, those two like twins from the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movies, you know, those weren't a little like the cue ball looking twin fellas. Yeah. So that was that in response to? What was that reply I give for just when I did something stupid. Something fat and stupid. Something both fat and stupid. But anyway, that was money well spent at first, but then I quit using it and was still paying for

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They're the terrible red necks. They like sex. They care way too much, but don't give a fun. They're the next that makes some people upset. They got three big old dicks that you. All right, well, here we are. What's up, everybody? Well read back in the game.

Cachos back with us, Joe. Did you save the world? Man, not, you know, a couple years ago, I think you'll remember, with this same group, I single-handedly solved racism, right? This one, though, is an even harder task, and it is about carbon emissions and saving the planet. So that's where they blew it, man. We were talking about that, how you save the world from racism.

Yeah. And then the next time you did anything with these people, trans people were at the brunt of the GOP. Yeah. And then that changed and now it's immigrants. It feels like every time you go up there, you change their target. At the very least, you make the GOP pick on someone new. That's true. It sounds like they've tried to go with science, and I just don't know.

I don't think you can beat that. And for the record, obviously I'm in jested. It is a very fun group to be a part of. And we did, I learned a lot of things. They don't listen. You don't have to lie. No, no, no. I really did.

I had a blast. Like, I love the stuff we do. But a lot of it when you're working on, you know, stuff like that, you have to do that. Part of the thing, the mission is like, hey, we want to put videos out that are funny, but also have a message. However, we don't, we can't put out anything that is not peer reviewed. like so in your sketches you need to know the actual numbers you know so you go to like a two-day class on this stuff and boy god i learned so many number one my house going explode because i got a gas stove which don't hit and it's leaking and probably killing you learned that yeah there's uh

what are you talking about i got a gas stove i do too and i've always i've it's hits for me because i like the temperature control you know and stuff like that but they did a test on like so many people that have gas stoves how like a lot of these them are just constantly leaking a little bit. And it's not the amount that would kill you in your sleep, but it is doing a decent amount of damage to the environment. The whole time I'm sitting here going like, what the fuck did they make him take? I mean, I've heard about this, but why did he have to take a class?

And this was just, this was part of a larger thing that gas stoves were just one of those. But it also like, what was really like, we remember that. I mean, that's liberal propaganda. It is liberal propaganda. It is liberal propaganda. That's why it's liberal. That's why it's liberal. That's why it's liberal.

You recall, Biden tried to take everybody gas stoves away, and the hero Republicans kept him from doing it. Yeah, I guess I just got it. That's why it's liberal, because it's an environment. I never understood what was happening. It's really funny because when that first all came out, like, I didn't even look further into it. I was like, well, this is going to, this is just some stupid shit.

And also, I have a gas stove, so I was like, I mean, you know, what are you going to do? I didn't realize, like, just how far out of their way Republicans were going. just specifically for big oil and gas or whatever. Because like, yeah, it's not like, nobody's saying like, they were acting like, so I'm a misogynist because I cook over flames. It's like, no, dude, it's, I don't think that necessarily they should be made illegal. I'm just saying the information needs to be out there so you can make your own choice. You know what I mean?

Because, yeah, it could be a dangerous thing. And I used to completely be like, I don't give a fuck. I'm not getting one of those electric stoves because I don't care what anybody says. the straight up electric coil stoves do not get you you're paying hot enough they don't they just don't i need that flame but induction cooking kind of do and i've been using that for a minute so um there was a point to all this oh one of the things was i got i knew when i was watching landman that billy bob thornton was full of shit like i knew that his character was full of shit because he worked for big oil but bro we we just sat there there's this dude who like does all these videos

just like breaking down any type of like pro oil propaganda that somehow sneaks into media. And it is crazy how clearly Balt and paid for Taylor Sheridan is, man. Like every fucking line is just like, that's not even close to true. Well, that don't hit. Don't hit the hair. I still like the show, though. Yeah. I don't care.

If y'all seen that, I know that a lot of people manage to avoid most just like regular TV. ads nowadays and good for them. But, uh, I, have y'all seen that ad, the T-Mobile ad that has Billy Bob in it, about, it,

it kind of kills me every time I see it because it's literally just, they literally just hire Billy Bob Thornton, apparently dropped him off in the middle of like a farm somewhere. And they just have him walk past, you know, old wagons and a barn and shit like that. This is T-Mobile? Yes, while talking folksily.

I think the idea is like, hey, T-Mobile, you can have us out in but-fuck Egypt now. Exactly. You know, I think that's how, I think that's what the idea is. But it's just Billy Bob walking through this like farm set and all this old farm equipment stuff, just talking real, real on-the-nose folksy-like about T-Mobile. And it's pretty egregious and funny, but he's just like, yeah, what, you know, used to be Verizon had the best coverage and they did. But a couple years ago, some science-type folks did them a few studies.

I'm barely, I'm barely like exaggerating this, by the way. It's like some sciencey-type folks did them a few studies. And turns out T-Mobile opened a can of whoop up. And like, and then at the very end, there's like a hint of self-awareness because it says something like, you know, no matter where you're at, you're covered, whatever. And then he stops and looks around and he goes, seriously, where am I? you know, kind of somewhat acknowledging like what even is this. But it's still, it's not enough.

And the whole thing itself is weird. And I see it all the time. A good idea badly executed, probably. Yeah, me, obviously, you know, he does fine. I don't think I'd even call it a good idea. It's just, it's too. Yeah. It's, I'm just saying, it's like they barely thought about it to me.

You're like, we got to think we can, you know, we're covered in rural America now. Who can we hire, Billy Bob Thornton? Of course. Where do we put it? farm right and we just let's just have him say everything we won't say but you know in like a in like a hayseed kind of way yeah but we know that billy bob like he's obviously billy bob but we've heard him regularly talk like it would make more sense that they just got an actor that we didn't know to be a folksy dude you know because then the whole time you're not focused on like

why is billy bob thornton talking like this you know well he doesn't why don't you know he's he don't it up too much. It's more about the words that he has, but also he definitely has a little bit the twang in there. But Billy Bob, you know, I mean, he'd be, he can talk of course. Without it, but he often does talk with it. I don't deny his authority

on it. You know what I mean? Where's he's from Arkansas, right? Yeah. He's legit. We just don't know he ain't dumb, and he's acting dumb in the commercial, is what I'm saying, right? Is he not from Texas? I thought he was from Arkansas, but well, I know one thing. He ain't know he'll Billy, quote the accountant.

Walton Goggins is a big break. Dude, you know what's... I was just about to bring... Oh, yeah. That's incredible. That's Ray McKinnon. It is. And it's Ray McKinnon who says that line.

Billy Bob ain't no Hillbilly. Speaking of Walton Guggins, I was literally just about to bring him back up because on the opposite end of the commercial spectrum, I don't know how to feel about it. He's been doing commercials for Walmart where he's like clogging. Like, he's not being real rednecky at all. You know what I mean? Even though Walmart is like fairly redneck. and Walton Goggins is known.

He looks gay. Have you noticed that? None of any dances? You're like, oh, I don't go to church with that guy. Is it a, like a clogging Goggins thing? No, that would be good if they said clogging. Goggins? Yeah. Maybe they're still in goggles.

Why are they not using that? It's right there. He does have, but that's his commercial for AI on GoDaddy's website. So he's got his hands in all the tills right now. And for the record, I am an unabashed Walton Goggins stand, acting white, love the motherfucker. I don't know anything about him personally. but love him but like yeah man you're right drew when he's up there clogging with them fucking chicklet teeth and his fucking flared hair he do he be he do be looking gay he looks like that guy who sells insurance in your town and everyone knows is in the closet but he's a huge christian somehow yeah yeah i mean he's got that kind of energy i love goggins but the more interviews he does

the more i am appreciative of how good of an actor he is dude because he plays badasses and really cool people and then he goes in there and talks and i'm like dude you're like this weirdo theater. Yeah. Oh, yeah, man. His Instagram. Most of them are, I think. Well, I don't know about most of them. But a lot of the leading guys. You're right.

Yeah. Like they, it's like being a version of. Like Clooney's just a dude. John Bernthal, like, he don't come off like that at all. Like Brad Pitt and them like they're just regular Joe dudes. Yeah, dude, Guggins, I follow him on Instagram. And bro, I mean, every day is some. It's a bit much.

It's a bit. Yeah, but again, I love him. And he's, if he was a bad actor, I would be so mad. But I'm like, well, you know. he can he when he shows up he plays man like what do you what's he doing on instagram every day he just just just nothing wrong nothing wrong it's just like he'll there'll be a picture of him and i don't know his old teacher from fucking that he's saying and then then it's like eight 900 paragraphs of the most fucking esoteric up your own ass bullshit but again he's not he's not and because

you've seen him on interviews because we've got you know we've been walton goggified lately you can hear it in his voice. So it's like he is as sincere as he can be with every fucking word. I mean, he does interviews and he's just like, you know, it kind of reminds me. And you're just like four paragraphs of how deep he is. And I don't think it's put on. I don't want this to come across like I'm like, what an asshole. No, I think he's fun.

It's more like, I bet you're good at clogging. Yeah, yeah. And again, he's not said anything wrong. I don't hate him for none of this. But it's just he is like, it's funny that, you know, we finally got a good old boy that's like, aside from Billy Bob Thornton. Like, we've always wanted Southern people to be more represented in Hollywood. And then we get one and he ain't up there talking about sweet tea and shit. He's talking about a goddamn chakras.

You know what I mean? God damn boy. Come on. And he's got new teeth. New touch. Push through him. Dude, that motherfucker gets new teeth every day. I swear to God.

He does because, like, I'll see him, and the next time I'm like, them's different hitting wear teeth. Every time I think he got divorced, I'm like, those are his divorced teeth. And, I mean, far be it from me to speak ill about a man getting new teeth, because Lord, God damn knows, as soon as I hit it, I'm getting them. You just got to see it because it feels like we're shitting on him and we're not, Tray. And I'm not. I love him. It's just such a dispersion.

From that word? Yeah. From the roles that he plays. and that in and of itself isn't that wild, and it's certainly not necessarily egregious. But then when he keeps talking, he's like one of those NYU dudes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which is great. I'm glad we have one of those. It's just not what you thought. Not what you thought. And I'm not even saying it's disappointing. It's just not what you thought. Well, I want to circle back to have the very, very, very beginning of the Walton Goggins part of this conversation,

though, Corey, maybe I misheard you, but you said, you're like, have you seen the Walmart commercials with Walton Goggins, and you're like, he's clogging, and you're like so you know he ain't what'd you say you're like he's not doing hillbilly shit or redneck shit or something like that it was the that it was the opposite like this like billy bob they got they hired him because he's a hillbilly to do hillbilly shit and guggins is like a hillbilly but they you know he ain't he's he ain't right way hold on oh okay but to be

y'all don't associate clogging with uh hillbilly shit no yeah i do because i i did it but that's like hill people stuff dude there's people and uh Yeah. Yeah, it's not far off from line dancing. I don't understand why. What did I do to make you think I didn't? You didn't? No, I did.

I did. No, and I understand. But like, there was, like, in my hometown. I just think of the Dutch. In my hometown, there was, you know, some redneck families and stuff that, like, they all clogged.

Yeah. And it was a big deal for them. But also, there's that, there's that dude who's, like, big on Instagram, who's a Tennessee fan. Okay. He's a Tennessee ball fan. and he clogs everywhere all the time and stuff

and it's very East Tennessee and hillbilly-esque shit. I agree. I agree. That's a perfect example of what I was trying to say. I was not trying to say it wasn't redneck for him to be clogging in the Walmart commercial. The way he looks while he's clogging. He looks like the gay Christians. But you know what?

That guy you're talking about kind of do too. It's kind of like a Vince Gill look where you go, I'm not saying anything out of pocket. But if we found that out, nobody would be shocked. But you know, it's funny it's it's definitely the way he looked because if billy bob had to be clogging i wouldn't have thought anything i'd been like yeah right on redneck's claw yeah but like yeah it's just he had his shirt tucked in he had his divorce teeth you know he was smiling but at the same time he's like

the straightest guy alive now that's come across even on the interview yeah he fuck all right you're not boyd crowder right but you get you get more pussy than him it's oh yeah walton gong i'm trying to think of who to compare him to. Jared Leto. He's a fucking southern... Man, but Jared Leto's kind of an ass. I was about to say he's... But he's, if Jared Letto wasn't a creepy pervert and just had the weird stuff.

Just had that, like, I'm up my own ass all the time. And more talent. He's way more talented than Leto, which is, I'm saying... Leto's good, but he's way better. Oh, dude, Walt and, dude, especially the fact that he really is the way he is in real life and, but can channel it to play those perfect Danny McBride characters, shows his range more than anything.

because it's not like he's just being a light version of himself, which a lot of comedic actors do. Like, he's not doing that. No. You just got to see some more Goggins interviews, Ray. I feel like you're going to have a perfect comp. God damn. I feel you're going to see it and he'd be like,

oh, this is, you know, some actor that we haven't thought of. I feel like Vice Principles gets is very underrated and it gets sort of ignored in the Danny McBride. You got so dark so fast. I know, but like I'm just remembering one of my favorite Walton Goggins lines ever is when him and Damien Riders sitting there and the black lady principal's about to walk up and he goes, I bet she gets up here and smells like

fuck butthole. You know, that's great. You know what? He kind of played that guy. There's part of that character's background is like he's really into Asian culture and everyone thinks he's gay. Yeah, that's just him.

That is maybe what we're getting at, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know the dudes who wear robes, silk robes? Of course. yeah. I think Walt was one for a minute. Yeah. Yeah, that dude, he fucks.

And again, you know what? I am glad that we have him and he's a representative because it does show that we come in many different forms. The dudes who love Asians, like webes or whatever, are, they transcend races and cultures, I feel like. Sure. But they transcends and supersedes, meaning it's like that takes precedence over other stuff. Oh, yeah.

In any type of person, like, do people, is there another culture, are, I mean, I know obviously plenty of, like, white, and especially white trash kids in this country, have a fascination with black culture and that sort of thing. But is there another, like, country's culture or regions culture that's like? Germany, it seems. I don't know if you've seen the children making these videos. Like fetterized and fantasized over and stuff the way that Japan and, like, Korea and shit are for people. Well, ours there. Do you mean from here?

You're right. They do. Yes, that's one thing that I do love there. Apparently, I think they're a smaller group, but Japan. does have the inverse of webes over there, which is people who dress like cowboys and do cowboy shit and stuff. They got greasers too. Love Taylor Sheridan.

This is not. I feel like in this we're speaking more on like fandom of certain things or whatever, but like there is a huge part of our population that fetishizes British monarchy. Like, like for real though, like the Brit, like they really do like the Victorian era. Like I today there's- Native Americans to a certain extent. definitely Native Americans for sure I feel like I see a little less of it

lightly but this tweet went viral of someone some dude who shared a clip from the ballroom scene in Gone with the Wind and where they're all you know it's a debutante ball it Scarlet's debutante ball and they were lamenting it they were like what happened to this America and it's like that America was just

Victorian England like that was what that was you know what I mean and that it was very much a obviously we still have a class system, you know, and you're treated as such. But like back then, it was like more of a cast than anything. And I feel like a lot of people really do fetishize that part, you know, for bad. No, absolutely. There ain't no doubt about that.

But I think it, like, I don't know, though, dude. But it ain't no anime for that. I best, that's why that's the exact way I was about to bring up. I was like so much of the anime and stuff. Like, it's just, I don't know. It's on a whole other level. It is on a whole not. level.

People like live for that shit. Do you think there's a big cross-humbers and shit? No, there's people who get into that stuff a little bit. It's nowhere near the level of like popularity or participation and stuff that that's true.

Japanese stuff is. I don't know what this says, but I feel like oftentimes when I see a non-binary person, they'd be into that shit. I don't know if there's a lot of crossover. I don't know what that means. Yeah, no, it's 100% true. It's partially because of like the anime storylines

Yeah, but also so are a lot of like NFL football players. Yeah. Like Gerald McCoy. Oh, God, dude. I'm pretty sure it's Gerald McCoy specifically who's like a colossal fucking weed. His whole house is like dedicated to anime shit and stuff. And so that's what I'm saying. The first person to point that out.

I'm pretty sure like a lot of non-binary. Yeah, and trans people. And I think they've written about it. Like I feel like I read this back on when I was on Twitter and stuff. Like Twitter stories, they feel like some of them. mirror their own if that makes sense. But also it's just so popular. Yeah.

Right. It is really popular. It is really popular. But also I feel like I've not read a lot of anime and manga. I've read some, but like now that I think about it, like some of the heroes in anime are like amorphous, non-gendered beings and stuff like that.

You know what I mean? So like that kind of does make sense. Also every now and then, they'll make a squid with tities and a dick. You know what I mean? So like they're for everybody. I think maybe that's it And then that's hentai

And then there's a whole other level Fugnari Whole that level of the perverted version of all that Where it's like they'll do shit like There's a character And one of these things that's And again I'm saying this is more like Like I said more underground

type stuff but I know that it exists There'll be a character in it who's like Oh she's a 2,000 year old Energy vampire or whatever Right or a demon but she's in the body of a like 12 year old girl. Yeah. Yeah.

And so it's like, it's a bad read. It's okay to be, yeah, because it's like, well, she's not 12 years old, though,

you know, that's like that, the argument that they'll make. She's like, well, she's two thousand years old. She's not a child, but she's in the body of a child.

There's like, there's shit like that. Went through Canada to get to Michigan there. You know what I mean? They just got some, you know, they just be wild, you know?

They wild. It's not a good look. Most, but, Most of people who fuck with that, with just anime and shit, are not fucking with that stuff. They're like, you know, whatever, Pokemon and Naruto and, uh, what's those? Oh my God. Oh, my God.

Studio Ghibli. Which those are great. Oh, they are great. I'm a, dude, uh, shit, I mean, that Castlevania was a Japanese anime. I fucking love that shit. Like, some of it, I really like. Sturgle Simpson put out of anime. It's great.

Right. Yeah. We've got, we did mushrooms in Kentucky and watched it in a hit. penis envy didn't realize that until i took them they were much stronger and that's when i did that 9-11 joke in front of the governor or something like that oh what's her role uh secretary of state she was what she was at the time yeah i don't know what she's up to now she oh just that you like the story which i have told her here before but or somebody has i have i have a joke about a joke which is like me doing this

joke in New York about the cops it was about cops and taking mushrooms and then I started at the end of it I would tell the story about in New York I was doing that and this woman said that's a bad joke and I was like fuck you and I yelled at it and all that and after the show it turned out that what she was saying was that's a bad trip so I'd yelled at this lady and made up this whole scenario on my head about her son being a cop and then when I met her after the show. She's like, well, my son is a cop. And I said on stage in Kentucky, what had been the funniest thing I could have said right then. Well, I hope he died at 9-11. And it was, and what was so great was I had been on mushrooms, the whole set. I had done well.

I had hidden it. No one. You guys were watching waiting on me to fail. With intent. And then it became, y'all were, couldn't believe I hadn't failed. You couldn't believe I hadn't went too far down the rabbit hole. You couldn't believe I hadn't freaked out or had a meltdown. And I said that. And as I remember, I don't know if this is exactly, I remember, Ha! That was me. One of you, a crowd,

complete silence and horror. DJ, I think, ran out of the room. We all had to. And then, no, you and Trey jumped into each other's arms.

Like, that's what I saw. I saw two of my friends jump into each other's arms because I said, what would have been the funniest thing I could have said to her. I wish your son would have died

in 9-11. Now, for the record, obviously, it's funny because it didn't work. That makes it so much funnier. But, like,

I also was laughing because I was laughing, because I think the line is funny and people should have laughed. It would have been the funniest thing I could have said to the lady because I'm not telling the story well today. I'm very tired to have a two-year-old. But the idea is I had fucked up royally. I had yelled at a lady for no reason.

And this was the moment where I should have apologized. So the funniest thing I could have said to her was the triple burger double down. I wish you would have died in 9-11, you stupid bitch. Don't interrupt me at a comedy show. All everyone heard was me say, I wish your son died at 9-11. If you open with that, I would have thought it was funny devoid of context. The only other things I would add to that are only related to the inciting story, the first story about which the meta story is about, which is I'm not saying part of this might just be in my memory,

but I remember that lady who you thought said that's a bad joke and you got upset at and later figured out she was on your side and all that stuff. The way I remember that is the first thing you said was, what we heard in the back first of all, this is the first thing. You were killing so hard. Like we were standing back in Carolines. Like you were at Carolines on Broadway, which isn't there anymore.

But you were in New York, but you were having such a good set. You're absolutely murdering. We're standing in the back watching me, Corey, and there was some other people like maybe. Ethan Simmons Patterson. And I think Joe Zimmerman. It was Joe Zimmerman. And we're also back there and just, and we're like, man,

he's having to kill her, say, yeah, he's crushed you, whatever. And then we just hear you out, seemingly out of nowhere just be like, what, what? You know, we don't know who you're, we didn't hear anything. So we don't know why you stopped or you're talking to. And then you go, as I recall, you go, fuck you, sir. And so that made it doubly funny when it ended up being a lady that, and not only a lady, but like a nice lady who was trying to like commiserate with or agree with you or whatever. But you're like, fuck you, sir. And, you know, and we, again, it was also funny because we couldn't hear what had prompted that.

So it looked like. Well, no one in the audience could, which is that was the rookie mistake that I made. In my mind, I had built tension. There was a silent moment. And I was down on one knee hiding behind the stool because I was acting out a mushroom trip. And you'd been crushing. In my mind, I built the silence. I've worked, the whole set is right here.

I have this whole crowd in the palm of my hands and they're leaning in to hear me. and I'm about to bring the fucking house down. And then in my mind, everyone heard her go, that's a bad joke. Of course. So I said, and I thought it was a dude, fuck you, sir. That's so weird. And I think I said, I had this whole, I think I said, I had everyone here. Moment of silence.

I've done well the whole show and you derailed me. Oh, God, damn. So then I tried to retell that as part of the job. joke of, you know, maybe just be nice to people. Don't yell at them immediately. Praise God. For those precious moments. Praise his glorious name. I wish I'd have died at 9-11.

Me too. But you know what? Doesn't have to die in 9-11? Your financial savings. Rocket money.com. Rock it. Oh, fuck. That ain't good.

got a rocket you you got the rest of it i don't even have it pulled up listen how can we follow drew's thing we got to move on put it yeah let's just move on for like three minutes and they won't listen back this is not the spot this is three minutes from now okay well no i just go ahead i mean look i'm money dumb y'all know that i've been money dumb um ever since ever my whole life and the modern world makes it even harder to not be money dumb in my opinion because used to you like had to write down everything you spend or you wouldn't know nothing but now you got apps and stuff on your phone. It's just like you can just, it makes it easier to lose count of, well, your count,

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this episode of the podcast. All right. And we're back. Corey sent me a thing. that I thought was fun to think about. And part of it I've brought up before. Really? Yes. I think, because that never really occurred to me this way,

because I've talked about the first part of it on the show before, and not even that long ago, because y'all know I've been obsessed with the inexorable march of time and that type of thing. Sometimes thought experiment people will bring up sometimes is like, you know, let's say you wake up tomorrow morning in 1998, but you remember everything, right? Like, you know, what would,

would you do differently? And it's fun. I've always thought about it in just those terms, like the way it's presented. But Corey sent me this tweet yesterday where someone asked that question. Another person quote tweeted it and was like, you know, you wake up tomorrow in 1999 with all your memories, what do you do? And they just said like, scream incessantly, scream into the void, claw my eyes out, have a complete breakdown, have to be institutionalized immediately.

And you know, that's funny because it's like, obviously it's impossible. It's a thought experiment. But if it did happen. Literally, but I'd never even considered the fact that if that actually did happen, that's 100% what anyone would do. Did you send this to the group or just to tray? Because I swear to God, before you said that, tweet, I was sitting here thinking, I would fucking kill myself. That sounds. And then what I was about to throw back at y'all in order to get you to see it my way, because I knew you wouldn't.

But now you started to tweet me is you wake up tomorrow. you don't remember, but you have these memories for the next 20 years. Wouldn't that make you go? Wouldn't you think, oh, no, I'm nuts. Yes, it would make me go nuts. You know what I'm saying? You don't have a memory of a time machine. You don't like, you're not like, oh, I did this to myself.

I have. Or I met a man in a coat and he had a button and zapped me. Just tomorrow you're like, I've done this. I made it to the year 2045 and I have these specific things. Wouldn't that make you... That's literally what I was about to say. Wouldn't that make you nuts? On occasion, I will have a bout of deja vu that is genuinely mind-blowing.

And it sucks because you can't explain to anyone how it was that it made you feel. You can't explain... It's the feeling that gets you, though. Yeah. But like, deja vu to where, like, for like 30 seconds, I was like, what the fuck? But that's every now and then that happens. But you hate it, don't you? Yeah.

If that was happening at a pretty steady click, I would. jump off a bridge if I couldn't shake the fact that I've been here before and I did this. Maybe what changes it for you, Trey, and I think this would change it for me is, did you choose it? Was there a time, you know what I'm saying? Well, actually, I, no, the one it was you wake up and you think it was all a dream. All I'm saying is I've heard people bring that thought experiment up before and it never even occurred to me the like what it actually, like the actual implications of it. I, just took it in stride as like what I feel like it's meant to be like what would you do differently

and for by the way I've always said nothing not much really yeah much if there but a couple like smaller things mostly just like career related in later years but like big stuff I mean pretty much nothing and I feel like a lot of people ask that question it's because they got a ton of shit they want to change I guess that means Apple or Google at that time and you don't have to do anything or there's that yes there's that too but anyway you probably fix it most of the other issues. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. But, but, but you still even

whatever you fucked up in your life. But like I said, I was telling, but you know, in reality, like, you know, my wife and children don't exist now. I wake up tomorrow and it's 1998. Like, hey, the wife and kids don't exist or Katie does, but she's somewhere in Wayne County and she's 13 and I'm 12. But also, I'm fat,

poor, sad, 12 on the inside. Don't hit. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, it's just everything about it sucks. Okay, going back to the manga or whatever the fuck you are talking about, this is the reverse now. Now, you are an old man in a 12-year-old's body. Right. That's true. Yeah, right.

Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, yes. Because then you, yeah, right. Because if you just have a girlfriend when you're 15, but secretly she don't know that I've lived 40 years and then went back up in this fat teenage boy's body. So, yeah. I didn't mean to bring it here.

I only thought of it because of that dragon story, but I don't like this part. Let's go back to the other. You'd be the only boy in high school who knew how to fuck, and it would blow everyone's mind. But you couldn't do it. I know. You couldn't do it.

I know you'd have to fuck all the teachers, but convince them it was fine for them to do because you're actually a 40-year-old man. You're going to have to commit a crime to get late. It's just, is it this person committing it or you? I guess I'm just saying, I feel like that's a relatively popular kind of thought experiment thing

for people to pose on the internet. in a stoner question type of way. And people usually just, like I said, take it in stride like I always did. But if you really actually think about it, every single implication of it is pretty horrifying. Like if it actually did happen, it would be one of the worst things imaginable.

I mean, maybe I saw all that, either from Corey or on my own. But that was exactly where my brain went when you just introduced it. Or maybe it was like one of those things where you knew you were going there. So the way you delivered it for the, first time in my life made me think negatively of it.

But that's the first thing I thought, man. Now, Andy, on the other hand, I feel like, now there's another thing. I think Andy's built different. Oh, yeah. Like, I think Andy would be like, okay, so I know that these things are going to go well. What can I feel? You know what I mean? Like, she would be like, all right, Rossi's going to happen.

That's my future. But do you know that? Because then you get. She would go there. Right, but she wouldn't go there. I hear you, but I don't think she would go there. It's also funny to predestination versus, because I thought that before too when it's come up and be like, do I have to make sure that I meet Katie at the same time in the same way that I did in real life if I want to ensure that my sons are born later? And even if I do, does that guarantee they will be?

I don't know the exact date either of them was conceived or whatnot. You don't know what I mean? So like that type of shit. Can you change stuff without meaning to? It's madness inducing. Well, I think it's also like we, we incorrectly think about the decisions we make as, being a 50-50-odd. Like, we go, oh, if I could go back, I would have done this instead of this.

And then magically, it would have all worked out. And it's like, maybe, maybe not. Maybe if you did the complete opposite, it just went bad in a different way. Well, especially for a lot of people, because it's like, yeah, we're worse. Whatever you do, you go on fuck it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you just can't get right. Right, that's what I'm saying. Like, it doesn't mean that if you said yes when you said no that that yes would have led

to it. You don't know that. This is sad, but it's true and worth thinking about in terms of this question. I think, though, like my brother, who I just talked to for the first time in a few weeks, and he's living at what is essentially a halfway house, and my mom won't speak to him at the moment, and he's trying to get a job at Hardee's as a 45-year-old man. Like, I think he would be like, it literally can't be worse. Yeah, that's true.

I mean, there's obviously some things like. There's no swastikas on my body? I'll stay here. You know, hypothetically, if you're fucking John Cresensky in a quiet place, maybe you'd go back and not let your fucking four-year-old walk that far behind you on a goddamn britt. Like, there are certain things that, like, probably have a definitive thing. But, like, I'm just saying, like, oh, if I don't take in this job instead of that job, like, those are the kind of decisions where it's like, man, you've got no way of known if that would have hit harder.

Like, that company could have gone under. It's cool you brought this up today. I saw this earlier. It's another time travel type thing. I've been trying, I had tried to do this bit. I don't say I've been, I kind of gave it up, it didn't really work, but I had this idea for a joke of like, Harry, you know, if I went back in time, I'd kill Hitler.

If I went back in time, I'd go to the Mongolian. I'm like, if I went back in time, I'd just give some peasant Somali around the time of the fall festival, bring a cow with me, let him eat steak for the first time. And it just wasn't, you know, it was just like a thought, but it wasn't good enough for a joke. But then I saw this sketch today where it was like women with a time machine it showed him like saving the world or whatever and it was like bros with a time machine

and the dude just goes in hands four loco to like a pap all in the 60s or whatever he would have loved it they would have loved it i think about this though if you let's say hypothetically in this scenario time travel is real and it works in the way that you could travel back in time to kill baby hitler you do that you're going to set off a chain of events that creates an infinite loop because then someone is going to try to go back and kill the guy who would trying to kill Hitler. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Have you seen that tweet that said maybe Hitler turned out the way he did because he was a baby. People kept showing up to kill him. There's a, there was an old episode of either Twilight Zone or Outer Limits or one of those, but I think it was the Outer Limits remake from the 90s or something. There was an episode of it where a guy went back in time to kill baby Hitler and he, like, he killed this baby, right? Yeah. And it was like the, the, the, they,

got, I don't remember exactly that work, but essentially the babies had been switched. Yeah. It'd been a switched baby situation. So like, and then, so that baby wasn't going to be Hitler, but now, you know, he killed the baby that was born Adolf Hitler, but that wasn't actual baby Hitler. Baby Hitler was just one that he, you know, that took Hitler's place. So he created Hitler? Yeah.

Yeah, right. Yeah. You know, that type, that classic sort of time travel type thing. Also, why don't you just go, why don't you just kill Hitler's dad? That way you get to kill a grown-up. It's the Terminator approach. Yeah. All right.

Here's a thought experiment that's maybe more fun then. What would like, you got a time machine and you're not allowed to do anything to go hit. That's the best time machine. You know what I mean? Like, that's like the rule. Like, listen, you can't shoot nobody. You can't try to change. Where are you going?

Oh. And you got to be you. Like you can't like. You can be like, okay. Also they have a bill that let you learn the language. Okay. That's the only. Yeah.

You got to be white, though. You've got to be a dude. But you can speak, if you want to go to Venice, you can speak Italian. I mean, I think 70s or 80s America, baby. I just go, that's only, like, why not? Cocaine was great. And also, they had air condition. Because I'm thinking about this.

Like, there are other time periods that I think I would love that. But then they don't have air conditioning. They don't have indoor. Then I'm like, I'm sorry, but there's, I couldn't possibly hit hard enough to justify sleeping in a hot house. I think, no, okay, but what about if it's just a weekend? But I think, I could be wrong. I know you said they've got, in this scenario, there's a pill or a device or something that will allow you to speak the language wherever you go.

But I still think, and you can just hand wave this away too. But let's say if you went to like ancient Rome for whatever reason or something that like even if you have that device and you're speaking Latin or whatever it was, they spoke back that like that you would still be so like noticeably different. Different. Like in every, like, just the way you talk, period. Even the words are correct. You're not. It's also like. And they, you know, people back then, they didn't cut into that sort of thing.

I don't know. But you would. I end up getting fed to lines is what I was in. Well, related to that on the other end, let's say that they didn't think who's this weirdo and kill you. But how, like, how do you get in the orgy? Because we read about these things and it's like, yeah, but that was probably like. You would have the knowledge of the time. The congressman or what?

Yeah, but knowledge might be like, I don't know how, you know what I mean? Right. Whereas like 80s, 90s, New York, it's just like, if I pay enough money, they're going to let me in this night. Exactly. I won't, yeah, dude, like, if you can only pick one, you could, like, and you can never go to any of the other ones, I might have to because, like, my desire to know what a Kualud felt like

Trump's almost any other aspiration I have in my life. I think I'm going to know. But I don't even, but I don't even, but I don't even need to, it's, I don't even need to, I mean, Quaila, yes, but like, there's a lot of things I don't, I don't even need to participate. If I could just somehow go back and observe from afar, there'd be tons of shit I'd like to see. Like Woodstock? Oh, like battles.

I'm thinking for, I'm talking fucking like Julius Caesar getting murdered. Like, I'm saying like, Jesus getting crucified. God, that would have like. You could help. If people have, uh, Tracy. I wouldn't do that. You got to run. He had a dog, too.

He had a dog. Get him. But seeing just how wild and crazy and badass looking George Washington really was or whatever. Yeah, dude. But have you ever heard people ask or pose before? People that like UFO shit, they say like, imagine this. Imagine the aliens finally decide we hit hard enough for them to contact, right? Like we finally passed their test, which obviously is that.

That ain't happened anytime soon. But like, just imagine it does. And when they show up, they're like, yeah, we've been. we've been keeping tabs on your planet for eons now and by the way like here's the footage

if y'all want it you know what I'm saying that'd be so wild they have like they've just been filming it all time so they have like fucking alien CCTV footage of all kinds of human history shit whatever like that would be so fucking rad

dude like imagine how rad that would be you could go you could be that'd be so rad like we could watch Steve McNair in high school you know what I mean play ball. It would have to be a deal where like they'd have to, did y'all watch that show, the three-body problem? Yeah, I did.

D&Ds. The guys from Game of Thrones, their new show on Netflix. Well, that's based on a book series. It's maybe my favorite sci-fi book series of all, one of favorite sci-fi book series of all time. But they have a concept in there of a like, it's like a quantum surveillance device

from a like super advanced alien. race and so it's like their like camera and recording shit like software on just in the air on just in the air like essentially everywhere all the time on a like quantum photon so you get the 360 view of so it and it would have to be something like that otherwise they'd have to be they'd have to have have a director the whole time being like okay what what do we need to pay attention to inside the coliseum you know inside yeah right exactly yeah go to two go to two yeah make sure you don't miss this when that particular jew is getting put on the cross at this time Man, like, what if they'd miss that?

You know what I mean? Like later, they'd be like, God, we really didn't get that. I would, you know, so there's a lot to consider there. I think one of my, this is obviously. The porn would be wild. You can do that now. I've got a MetaQuest 3.

You can walk around that ass. Anyways. No, I meant like I'm trying to watch Mary Magdalene get down. Oh, yeah. No, no, no, no, no. Before she met Jesus. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, when she was a real.

She didn't have hope. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. dude she was a foot washing whore and the best one of all time i it's morbid but like i want to go back to when abraham lincoln got shot but not the lord's or the lord's hoar the lord's hoar lord's own i want to go back to when abraham lincoln got shot but not even to watch him get shot i want to hear how hard that stupid fucking line from my american cousin made them idiots laugh you know what i mean

like i want to get that because that line at the time that was like the funniest fucking line there was and I've read it since, but I want to see that work on someone. What is the actual line? Do you remember it? I think I've got to that she was. So the whole premise, this is why it's funny. You have to have the context. The whole premise of my American cousin is essentially the liberal redneck goes abroad, right?

Like he's my American cousin. They're this hoity-toity aristocratic English family, and their cousin from America is coming over. And at that time, all of America was just Alabama. You know what I mean? which it still is really, but like that's how they, that he's dumb because he's from America. And so they're treating him dumb the whole time,

and he's not really saying much. And then you get towards the end and you realize he's really smart and he's known what y'all are doing the whole time. And the way he reveals that he is smart is by the line. She says something, yada, yada, you're stupid. And he's like, well, I think I know enough to turn you out, old gal. You sock-jogizing old man trap. That's the line.

But it's only funny because it was fan. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Yeah. Oh, it's only funny because before this, he hasn't said any fancified words. You know what I mean?

Right. And you sock doll. I think I know enough to turn you around. You sock dologizing old man trap. Bangor line. That is like page and doctor from hangover of them, of this time. Yeah.

And I want to see that. I want to see that hit for people. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Same vein. I know that there's a composer. I can't remember which one it is.

It's one of the bigger ones who, like, was so ahead of his time at first. People booed. Mm-hmm. That's crazy to me. They went nuts. They were like, get this. What the fuck is this? And it wasn't lyrics.

They were offended by the noises. That's crazy. Hey, Prince opening for Rolling Stones. I'd like to see that show where he got booed off stage. Hell yeah, dude. Because I want to see how hard he actually was. I know he was hitting. You know?

Like, I know he was hitting. Zepplin had that first album blow up, but they weren't huge, but they were kind of big. and then they played stairway to heaven a few times live and people were like what the fuck is this this is awful yeah that's crazy yeah i don't know i don't think it's funny i'm drawing limitations on this completely absurd scenario your imagination's such a grave place i don't think that even aliens would have been long enough round long enough for this but like you know trying to see some dinosaurs it would hit for me real hard like that hip see what they actually well we ain't got to get into all that

but you know, but uh... Watching cavemen like it was a reality show would be prime television. Yeah, probably pretty, uh, because that's something like, would it be like, how much of it would be a like, oh, we really weren't all that different than type of thing versus would feel like completely totally alien to you basically. I think there'd be moments of both. Right up to the rape. Right.

Yeah. Well, that's why I almost said. I was almost like, yeah, it'd probably be very, very upsetting and disturbing to. I was like, I don't know, maybe they, maybe they mostly just, like most of the time, they were just picking berries and shit and cooperating on hunting fucking elephants, woolly mammoths and stuff like that. And they weren't doing all that much. Truly, it was mostly that, right?

Yeah, you keep rape all the time. You got to eat. It's like that great, have you ever read this story? There's that book, I fuck, it's famous. The Boys on the Island. Lord of the Flies. Lord of the flies. eyes. Someone pointed out at some point like, well, this really happened.

Some British school boys who lived on, who summered on some aisle, the Brits owned at the time, got lost for months. And when we found them, they were basically communist. No one had heard anybody. They had organized themselves in a non-leaders. It was like, oh, like it's not always that we're, right. We made it because we cooperate. We have different, but we also cooperate. Well, see, I've, right. See, I've thought, I think we've talked before. about like in i love post-apocalyptic media like i eat that shit right but like i get annoyed how it's almost always a situation where it's like let's say it's a zombie apocalypse it's like oh

the zombies aren't the real threat it's the other people and it's like that's always the thing where it's like every time like any other group of humans is like the worst thing you can run into and they're they're all fucking cannibals now or their bloodthirsty or you know it's going to be bad when the hero runs into a different set of humans and that type of shit and i've just always thought like I'm not saying I'm not saying they wouldn't be that or some of that but I don't know

I think we do a little bit better maybe than what those movies and shit give us credit for but maybe I'm just completely naive but I just you know I don't think we'd devolve immediately into complete chaos I think we try to figure some shit out and help each other and stuff

at least in smile I think brutal author Cormac McCarthy who's never been one for naivete or yeah sang you know sangring that's not the right word the road is maybe

the latest post apocalyptic thing of but I think he nailed it in the road because at the end his whole point is to get the boy to the group who is cooperating and then that group lets the boy in I'm sorry for the spoiler

everyone not the but not him because he's not like to me he captured exactly what it is I think tribalism does take over in those, you know, like, all right, going back to the K-Man thing, I think they would all get along and cooperate with each other. And then if an outsider came around,

they'd buck that person up, even if that person was innocent, even if it was just someone stumbling through. I think that is closer to reality. I think that we are so big and connected now, it's hard to, like, you know, get rid of that part of us. But I think Kormack captured it where it was brutal,

it was tribal, it was awful, and then there was a group that was not living that, way that was not being full on savages but they like very sternly was like you can't we've been watching you you cannot come into our camp because you are a savage but the boy can i think those movies are democratic propaganda to try to teach us that we can't live without big government what about that liberals i think it's actually genuinely right wing not propaganda but instincts taking over a lot I think a lot of sci-fi writers, I don't think they skew like conservative Republican. Yeah.

But I do think they skew like brutalist. Yeah. And I think it's like this idea of like every man for himself is the way of the jungle. It's human nature. Like human nature. Right. Yeah. And it's.

Anarchy actually is mostly cooperation. It's just. Yeah. Andarchy's fine. But anyway, I think it's actually that that stuff skews little C conservative, like conservative philosophy. Well, because it's like it's like you. said a minute ago, part of the whole reason we even got all this, all these computers and shit to begin with, the way we even got here to begin with was because of, uh, you know, our capacity

to work together on shit and exploit one another. Yeah, but our desire, we have a desire to connect, I think. Right, but, um, I don't always buy the exploitation thing. I've been thinking a lot about this, not for any reason related to comedy, because it's not funny. So I'm going to warn you guys of that right now. But, you know, we get this thing of, um, a good friend of ours. Bobby, I won't say the last name, maybe he won't care, but he said to me at some point, like we were having a discussion about some

of the protests going on when he still lived in L.A. And I was like, I don't know, it seems to me that the corporate allegiances of America have sort of led us here. And at the heart of that is capitalism.

And he's like, I'm not saying it's a good system, but it's the best one we got. It's the only one we have that works. It's what got us all innovation. And I thought a lot about that and I still think about it. This was years ago. I don't think I agree. Like I hear what you're saying about exploitation. It exists, but I don't think it helped

us. I don't think that capitalism is why we got a computer. No, it helped four people, is the point. I think time is why we got a computer. Yeah. Like the notion that I do think freedom, which came at the same time as capitalism, individual freedom

helped. I think the ability for upward mobility inside society, which came at the same time as capitalism, and capitalism was the first system that introduced that, and I give it credit for that, helped and created that. But I don't think that the idea we can make money off this is actually what made the explosion in tech.

I was actually thinking further, but I know I started that by saying the whole way you even got all these computers, but I was thinking even further back as far as in terms of exploitation, I just feel like nearly every great achievement of man, going back to the very beginning. It's like, you know, it was slaves. Right. Or the equivalent.

You know what I mean? Like it was like you can skip a lot of stuff if you don't have to talk people into your dream. You just got to make them. I just refute the fact that like even if you want to have capitalism, I'm like fine, but I just don't understand why hospitals and jails have to be a part of that equation. I don't think like to me it's like we're sick is why. Right. But I'm like, dude, we wouldn't even have to dismantle our entire way of.

living to just get free health care. Like it's not going to dismantle everything. They think it will. But I mean, like, they make too much money on the fucking prisons and all that. There's just so many things that shouldn't be for profit and we decided to make them for profit. But I have to, dude, if you got a clothing company and you work your ass off and you design, like, yeah, absolutely.

You should be able to have that business and make money and charge whatever the fuck you want. But, like, I don't understand why you have to have the same model for prison and health care and want to get rid of public education and all that shit. It's like, can you not let something fucking. live in harmony for fuck's sake but you know i agree with you i mean the only reason i brought up capitalism though and i guess tray's right it was the computer thing that set me off was like i just don't i was trying to say i don't know if exploitation is needed for innovation but i do think

tray has pointed out that like but it can speed things up absolutely that's undeniable it's very undeniable absolutely and fear you know like the fucking the space race and all our fears of like we can't let Russia beat us on this thing because what are the implications if they have all this technology and we don't like fear exploitation and a lot of it ends up making our lives better but I don't know that that's the primary like like you know I'm glad that uh fucking what what's a thing that hits uh air conditioner fucking whatever cheeseburger cheeseburgers yeah they hit they do you see signs had your back Corey actually I mean you may not I don't know how either of you will feel about this.

I liked it. So you guys will pray hate it. What is it? You should eat two cheeseburgers instead of cheeseburgers and fries. No, I've been saying it. The cheeseburger is the side. Because unless the fries are banging, then it's like whatever. But like, when I go to dinner.

They're pretty like nine times out of ten, that's better for you. They have to say it. Oh, I don't even need to be convinced of that. I'm actually just, I find that French fries are the single most hit or miss item. Exactly. And if they miss, no point. In terms of America, period. Like, in and out, I get two burgers.

French fries can be so, so bad. And it's like Corey said, I feel like 10 to 15% of the french fries I ever get. I'm like, these are fire. I eat every fucking one of them. I love it. 60 something percent are like, I don't even give a fuck about these. Give me some chicken nuggets or another cheeseburger or whatever. And then 30 or whatever percent is like, I'm upset by these.

When I go to Wendy's, I get a time. Yes, absolute waste of time. And instead of fries, I get chicken nuggets. Those are my fries. And now I do more protein, you know? Protein is the main scientific point and then also the way most fries happen to be made now. Like I read through it and it was like, look, if you're getting fresh cut whole potatoes and they're fried and decent oil, it's not as bad of a difference. But for the most part, they're just made in trans fats and whatever.

If I go to a burger joint and their standard burger like just comes with fries, that's just the thing. thing. I'm like, okay, whatever. I'll get the fries, you know. But like, yeah, for the most part, like if a bird, if you can just get it all a cart, if the burger is big enough, like one of them hearties burgers, often I don't even get a side because I'm like, well, dude, the buns are the side. You know what I mean? Like, I got my carbs here. I got my meat here. I got the vegetables. This is a goddamn complete meal. I don't need any extra carbs on my shit, you know? Hell yeah, dude. But since I think, now Central Park, I got to get them.

I can trouble more sauce into my mouth. I agree with that. And I love. And I love. love me some shoe shoestring fries and Central Park fries, but like, there's just a lot of restaurants where their fry game does not make it appealing to, it's like, why waste, why waste 1500 calories on a thing that don't hit when I could get a fucking ice cream or, like, or, you know, another burger, like. To say nothing of the entire nation of England, like, I don't know what y'all are doing over there. I know you love your chips with your fish and stuff, but they don't hit. It, no, they're all the thick cut, what we would call steak fried type varieties, whatever.

With barely any skin. They're pale as fuck. They're not crisp. Like, it's like not even, they don't even cook them in oil. They just like have an old lady breathe on them for like an hour. Yeah, I don't. No, that's true. The fish goes hard.

The fish goes so hard. We ain't sorry. I heard that. All right. Well, on that note, let's get out of here. Y'all can come see me this weekend. Omaha, Des Moines, and Kansas City. And then after that, coming up, I got Indie, Austin, St. Louis, and a bunch of other places.

Go to Trey Crowder.com and check them all out and make a hit, please. I will be in Knoxville this Friday the 25th, Kingsport, Tennessee, the 26th. I've got coming up the 31st. I've got Birmingham, Alabama. I know that I have Denver coming up, and I just added Boulder. I'll be announcing that soon. and then I have Chattanooga, September, let's say 5th and 6th, around that weekend, Drew Morgan Comedy.com for tickets.

Come out and see me. The Knoxville show is about sold out. Let's get it done. Kingsport, we announced that late. Somebody please come. Word. I'm going to be in Lexington, Kentucky, August 14th, and Charlottesville, Virginia on August 15th. Tickets are moving fast, but get them because if both of those shows sell out,

I've said this multiple times online. And I'm sticking to it. If both of those shows sell out, I'm getting a tattoo on my ass of Robert E. Lee sucking off Colonel Sanders. So Lexington, Kentucky, and Charlottesville, Virginia, Corey Ryanforster.com for tickets. Even if you don't live in the area, just buy a ticket and don't even go if you want to be a part of history. If you want to see the stupidest tattoo ever and make my wife and mom mad, we love cori.com is all my bonus stuff. Thank you all for listening. Oh, and I write for the Atlanta Journal Constitution and just put out a new thing.

thank you all for listening to the well red show we'd love to stick around longer but we got to go tune in next week if you got nothing to do thank you god bless you good night and skew fart