Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 233- Chernobyl Diaries (2012)

Episode Date: June 17, 2019

This week, everyone else has been talking about Chernobyl so why shouldn't we? Except instead of diving into a well-crafted, critically acclaimed HBO miniseries, we decided to discuss the 2012 dark tourism horror film "Chernobyl Diaries." Special topics for your consideration include: a new boy band that's just about to blow up called BOYSTREET, the first and ultimately last installment of our new segment "the Yakov Smirnoff minute," a film loosely based around Scooby Doo, a shocking plot revelation and autocorrect: it really does know you best.  Do you like...I don't know, travel & tourism horror movies? We can help you out! Check out Episode 15- "Blair Witch Project," Episode 60- "An American Werewolf in London," Episode 175- "House of 1000 Corpses" or Episode 186- "Tourist Trap."  Hey, this week we're asking for a favor-- can you help out a fellow horror fan by taking the Queer for Fear survey? It's being administered by a PhD student who could really use your input on their dissertation. Go take the survey here: https://mmu.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/queerforfear Have you seen this one? What did you think? Let us know your thoughts at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at [e-mail] and if you're feeling super generous, leave us an iTunes rating and review. Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast.  

So, friends of the podcast, Jim and Sarah, recently went to Turnbill. And when talking to Jim about it, I said, you're braver than I am, because if I went to Turnbill. And when talking to Jim about it, I said, you're braver than I am, because if I went there, any time I had an itch later on in life, I would just assume that I have the cancers. Oh, for sure. It seems terrifying. It seems terrifying.

And it was a terrible. I knew very little about Chernobyl before recent weeks that it's become sort of mainstream in American culture to talk about it. I just knew that it that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was a that it was a that it was a their that it was a their their their their their their their their their their their that's. that's. that that that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. their. their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. t. t. t. t. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te.. I just knew that it was a nuclear reactor that went kaboom basically right? Mm-hmm. Technical term. Uh-huh. That's what the actually the HBO series is called. It's called Went kaboom. I don't know if you knew it. Chernobyl colon. Went kibum. It's starring Bobcat Golthwaite, Yahoo! It's cahoom. It's crically acclaimed at this point, so. Dramatic turn for everyone. Damn, what a depressing, horrible thing. Yeah.

Yeah. This movie got out in front of, got in there early. Want to capitalize early. It's 2012. It's called Chernobyl diaries. By your friend in mine, produced by Orrin Pelly. I know him. Yeah, from the paranormal activity.

Oh, OK. The highest, grossed, lowest pay, or lowest output money of all-time movie. Sure didn't have a lot of money to work on this one either, huh? A little bit more. Well, OK, in this episode, I'm going to be both crueler and kinder to this movie that is necessary. So. The last week's episode definitely made this movie shine a lot more than it would up under normal circumstances for me. Can I be honest with you? This is a better movie.

It's a better movie. It tells a story. I mean, what this movie presupposes is that I care about the emotional lives of its characters, which, like, the problem is that I don't and you don't and nobody does. But I get it. I got this movie. I was like, oh, I see what you did there. And I appreciated it. This isn't that long line of like, like a movie like Hostel where you have like a bunch of characters and I'm like, oh, I don't give a fuck if these people die. Just bodies. Just walking bodies. Like, fucking Malcolm in the middle, little brother. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thoom. thoomea. thi. thi. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. And, I, I, I th. And, I th. And, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi. And, like, like, thi. And, like, like, thi. And, like, thi. Yeah. Like fucking Malcolm in the middle, little brother, I don't care if that guy dies. You mean Jesse McCartney?

Of what was that boy band he was in? Dreamtown? He's like a boy band singer. He's a pop star. He's not an actor. Well, yeah. I mean, that was his brother Paul. I have a lot of notes of, oh, don't make that's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that that, that, that, that, that that that was a that was a that was a that was a that was, that was, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the that the tho, tho, tho, don't make him do that. It's, it was called, Dream Street.

Dream Street. Dream Street. The Nightmare and Elm Street tribute band. Dream Street, yep. Oh, he is bad and acting. Weemal. The other actors, I would say, are on the level of like, um, bit part on Young and the Restless, which is fine. That is fine to me. That's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. That's, th. That's the Restless, sure, which is fine.

That is fine to me. That's a bit of acting that I almost find heartwarming. The actress who plays Zoe. Which is Zoe. She is the Norwegian. Okay. She is on Westworld. Oh, a real job.

Yeah. And she plays a super intimidating outlaw in that movie. And like when I was like, that's that's, that's, that, that, that, that, that, that, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. That, th. That, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, that's thi, thi, that's thi, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th like when I was like, that's a lady from which world? But like, she's actually, she's legit. She's good. She's good, good. I'm glad to know that. And Michael, the Australian. Yeah.

Uh, Nathan Phillips is his name. He is in the movie Wolf Creek, which is an Australian serial killer movie. Ooh, I like that. How to that? They got a lot of crazy killers in Australia. Why haven't we done that movie? I don't know. You want to? Maybe.

It's real brutal. Maybe not. Maybe. We'll talk about it later. All right. They don't need it. They don't need to know. Did you say that because because because because because because because because because because because because becausethink of a Wolf Creek. Is it a horror movie?

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. In the, in like the grand Texas, Texas Chainsaw, like, gotcha, gotcha. This is a movie about four, nay, six kids who go to Turnover. I love when they added to them, I was like, oh, that doesn't bode well for you guys doesn't I first I was like oh the Australian guy's gonna be the first to go because he's like a dumbstoner and then I was like but he's a survivalist because exactly. Don't let the man bun fool you. He's gonna take some people out.

I was also sad that the Russian host was the first one to die, because I was like, I want him to stick her out. You liked Yuri? I did like Yuri. Yeah, I figured. It was unclear whether you... for a while I thought Yuri was in on it and he was like luring them into like some sort of trap. But I think Yuri really was just an extreme tour guide.

He really was just trying to make some money some some some some mmmak some mmak some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m make some m maketo make some make some money. He works alone. Are we going to do the accents or now? We said we were, so. I, fucking dark tourism. Yeah, that's just such a stupid thing. Did you ever watch that Netflix show of Dark Tourist? No, because it looked stupid. When we were on vacation last year I got up early one morning and like binge like four episodes of it and it's stupid but

it's like he goes to Chernobyl he goes to Fukushima like what are you doing and he does just like dumb shit that's like I go to a museum asshole sorry he goes to like a like a Nazi Sorry. He goes to like a Nazi museum? Yeah. And it's like a Nazi serial killer museum. What? And it's like, you know, people find the stuff offensive to the guy and the guy's like, yeah. Yeah, I know.

That's why I make my money. The fuck you talking? Yeah, this is fucked up that you're doing. I know, I know. I I I the Nazi museum. I know. Oh, right. Oh, my God. So there's these four American kids. There's two brothers who are Chris and Paul. Of course they are. They're American brothers. And there's Amanda Natalie. The curling irons gone wild.

What? Okay, the blonde woman's wig is a banana ramma. Why is there a wig involved in this? She's wearing at least two two two two two two two two two two two two two two thi thi thi thi thi. Oh thi. Oh thi. Oh thi. Oh the thi. Oh their thi. Oh thi. Oh, tho tho tho tho. Oh, thi. Oh, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, thi. Oh, the the the the the thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, the the thi. Oh, the the the thi. Oh, the the the the thi. Oh, the thi. Oh, thoo. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, the blonde woman's wig is a banana-rama. Why is there a wig involved in this? She's wearing at least two different wigs. Yeah. And she looks like a bunco, Christine, Taylor. Taylor? Melody from, hey dude, Ben Stiller's wife in those movies, you know. Oh, Marsha Brady.

Yes, exactly. She looks like a bunco that woman. She looked like you shouldn't be hanging out with these dudes. Right, these like these terms. Your fiance is not, you know, maybe if he's in Dream Street I guess, boy street. I like Boy Street. I like Boy Street better. I feel like Boy Street. Look I'm putting together a boy band. It's called Boy Street. If you want to get involved, let me know. I'm going to be the producer. It's going to be the next Backstreet Boys. Attention, Boys. Well, it's not Man Street.

Ha ha ha. Attention boys. Attention boys. Do you want to make money? Of course you do, boys. Who's that dude that just goes around and like, there's like the kingmaker of those bands, right? Like, uh, he worked with like new edition and then new kids on the block and like, he's

just a dude that goes and finds boys to be in a man. Ah, boys, come here. He's a Boy Scout. Not that kind of boy scout. Woo, boys. Boys Street, it's going to be great. Debuttal the album is called I Love You. That sounds like it would have been Rickard Javais's character on the office would be like, yeah, I was in Boy Street.

Um, so okay, so there's these four people and they're totally unlikable, even though they haven't done a single unlikable thing. You just, you're like, fuck you! Chris seems like a dude, your boy street boy. Seems like a guy who would walk with his hand at his girlfriend's back pocket. Oh, it's gross. And she seemed like the kind of girl who would be tha tha thuuuuuui. th. th. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th, they they they th, they th, they they they they they they they they they they th, th, they they th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi they're they they. Yeah, ugh. Yeah, like. And they try to like humanize them and make you care by revealing that he's going to propose to her and I was like, you're 12. You're 12. Don't get married. You're in Boy Street. You haven't even aged out of Boy Street yet, as you will at age 16. Aluminuto.

Just an FYI for Boy Street yet, as you will at age 16, alumnudo. Just an FYI for Boys Street. You're gonna get menudowed. I just think it's fair to let them know up front. But maybe you'll be the Ricky Martin. Maybe. Um, so handsome. Does it ever make you sad that, if we talked about Ricky Martin before, does it ever make you sad that they made him do live in Levita Loca and pretend to to to be like the the to th. th. th. th. th. th. And thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, to thi, thi, to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th, th, th, th, the the th, th, th, the th, the thi, thi, the thi, the thi, the thi, the the the tho thoooooo the thooooooooooo the thi, to thi, to thi make you sad that they made him do live in Levita Loka and pretend to be like a lady loving Lothario? That fucking bums me out. Somebody quoted a lyric from that the other day and I was like, that sucks. That sucks, right? But he's like married to some other very

handsome man. And I think they have several children who are also very handsome, so man street. They're actually in a band street. It used to make me so their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. they they th. they th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they they they they're they're th. th. th. th. they're they're they're they're th. Somebody. Somebody they's they're they're th. Somebody. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Somebody th. Somebody th. th. th. Somebody th. th. Somebody th. th. th. th. th. th. t t t t t t t t to to to to to to to tog to to to to tou to to tou t sad that they made George Moycobi in a closet. And I was just like, fuck it. That's one of the most handsome human beings to walk the face of the earth. Let him fuck whoever he wants. Let him do his thing. So yeah, like, and I like that they want to show you that like these kids have a little bit of chutz when like the like three like holigan dudes. When like the like the like the like the like they. Like they. Like they. Like the the the they. Like the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Like th. th. Like th. Like th. Like th. Like th. th. Like th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. the the th. the th. th. th. the th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. th. the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. their. their. their. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th.. Oh, the Letcherus Ukrainians. And they're like, oh, we got to kick grass. Yeah, I knew you were going to do it. And the guys was like, hey, man, everything's cool. And they're like, go home. I was like, oh, yeah, you guys really stood up to those guys. It was real good fight. Those two not want. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the to. to. they. they. to. they. they. to. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the. the. the. the. the. the. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. We're. We're. We're. We. We're. That was weird. It was dull. Like, ugh. It was like we need to get this up to an hour and 30 minutes. It was like a lot of parts of this world are dangerous guys. I mean, I have watched enough like Eastern European Holigan videos to know that these people are terrifying. And okay. They meet up in like fields and just kick the shit out of each other. It's insane. Yeah, oh god

Let's say I watch it and not a high time in my life No, no, you were just like putting popcorn eminms and popcorn and watching that on your evening Everything's going great. Let's watch four hooligan videos Oh my god. What are we doing? So? Paul's like hey, I talked to my boy, Yuri, and he's going to take us to, uh, is it, tria pat? Tria Pat? Yeah. Which is the abandoned city in Turnoble. Yeah.

And that was like, it's going to be the factory town where everybody lived, as Jim told me, in my behind-the-sign. They're the-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, thi-s, thr-s, thr-a-s, thr-a-s, thrie. to-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, OK, let's do that. Like, the amount of turnaround that people have in this movie is insane. It's because that woman wants to fuck him. But doesn't? But doesn't? But does it? But also doesn't? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, the way it's shot are very, very good. I assume they, I mean, they went there. They went there. Yeah. Oh yeah. It looks great. I'm just saying like, it looks awesome. I think it's filmed well. I think it looks great. I think the, like, the entire town is so spooky. I think they did a really good job with that. They also were smart and didn't give you the full reveal on anything that's attacking them except for the bear. Well I don't know about that because I would have liked to have seen something. Obviously they spent their money on plane tickets. I get that? I get that? There was clearly no budget. This movie was made for a million dollars. I'm sure there was a lot of a buttering of palms to get them in there and stuff because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because they they they they they they they I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I'm they I'm they I'm they I'm they I'm they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're to they're to th. the the the thi the they're they they they're they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're there and stuff because you have to pass their checkpoints to get in there and I'm sure they were like, hey, guys?

But I do think that like they should have left, actually in my opinion, the Norwegian lady out, don't pay her, don't buy her a ticket, make get us a ghost, get us a monster, get us something. Well, that's, yes, let's get into into in a little bit what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, their, the, the, the, th. And, th. And, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. And, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. And, to, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, their, their, their, their, and, and, their, and, their, their, their, their, their, they. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, they. And, they. And, that's... Yes, let's get into in a little bit what I wish was there. The Chernobyl Diaries of your dreams. Somebody did ask us, I was, I was, uh, when I requested, um, people give us questions for a mailbag. Um, someone asked us what, like, a question about movies, but they were like focusing on, they wanted this movie to be good. They thought this could have been really good and it could have been for sure.

Yeah. Especially as much as I like surprisingly paranormal activity. Right, I honestly don't think this was a that bad. No, and I think I think it harkens back to 50s sci-fi horror movies where it. We're just like, yeah, we're just cranking these fuckers out. Who cares? But like, it's got a little bit of like, hey, all right. This isn't a bad idea. It's definitely not a bad idea. And it looks great. And I have to say that like the packs of dogs,

that is extremely frightening to me. Yeah, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. the. the the the a pack of starving dogs. I feel like that's, I mean, I saw an off-leash dog in the cemetery recently and I was like, I'm gonna die. I was like, can I climb up onto one of the mausoleums? Like, I was scared and it was just somebody's off-leash dog. I have the opposite reaction of like, oh then I would want to help I didn't get food. Yeah, it's going to eat you. That's what they do. Anyway, I thought that was very frightening.

Yeah, I mean, like, you know, going into an abandoned house is a scary situation. Yeah. You're just magnifying that. Yeah. It's an abandoned city. That's crazy. that's an abandoned city that if you stay. thia. thia. thia. thia. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tha. tha. that thi. that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that. that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thou. that. that. thou. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. thou. tha. tha. that's that's that's tha too long, we'll kill you. We'll kill you. And like, there's very scary guards guarding it. I feel like once they got there, they're like, well, we drove two hours, there are no other choices. Like, if I got there and those guards wouldn't let us through, I wouldn't be like, yeah, let's find a way around those guards. fucking guys. I know, take me home. We're going to Taco Bell. I know I am 100% made out of chicken shit, but when I'm in a car with an ex-Russian special service guy, yeah.

And he's like, yeah, we're not going to do it. They're like, oh, come on, mother fucker. No way. No way. No, sir. Yes. You want something. .

. Bye-bye. You want something from Taco Bell. They have these potato tacos that will knock your sex off. They're so good. They're shockingly good. But he's also doing exposition in Adidas track suit, which is a little on the nose for me, for Yuri, the character of Yuri. In my mind, you can't put on an Adidas Traxuit. Like legally, you have to have a Russian accent to put on the full tracks soon.

It's, oh yeah. So there's this like kind of menacing shot where the camera just turns 360 degrees while they're in the van and the guard walks all the way around the outside. And I was like, this is good. I thought the guards might be bad guys. I thought thought thought thought thought thought thought th thought thu thu thu thu thu thu thu-I thu-I thu-I thu-I thu-I thu-I thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thi thus might thi thi thi thi thi thi thus thus thus thus the kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind thu, I might thu, I might thu, I might thi, I might thi, I might thi, I might thi, I might thi, I might thi, I thi, I thi, liked, liked, liked, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi. I thi. I thi. I them or something, I don't know. That would have been cool. I thought it might be like a most dangerous game scenario. Which felt very of the time with things like hostile,

but I guess that was much earlier. Anyway. But this movie is sort of like repeatedly making these nods to stuff like hostile. Um, in the beginning of it felt very much like that movie. I don't have they've ever seen th seen th seen th seen th seen tho hostile tho hostile tho hostile tho hostile tho hostile tho hostile tho hostile tho hostile tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho that move. I don't know if you've ever seen Austell or not. I did once when it first came out. But it's sort of like people traips it around Europe and blah blah blah blah. And then and it also has like um like the Hills have eyes kind of vibe to it of like people going into a desolate area and like there's obviously somebody or something out there and there's just this creepy. Yeah. Yeah. So it's got nonnnods to that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff that stuff the the the the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills the hills. the hi. the hills. the hills. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the hi. It's the h. It's the h. It's the h. It's the h. It's the h. It's the h. It's the h. It's the h. tap. tap. tap. tap. tap. tap. tri. tp. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. there and there's just this creepy, yeah. Yeah. So it's got nods to that stuff going on, I think. I've never seen the Hills have eyes.

Not the original nor the remake? Yeah, yeah. Maybe we should do that sometime. That is a movie. Yeah, I'd be interested. I haven't seen that movie since I was really way too young to have seen that movie. Yeah, yeah. And it's got Michael Berryman and who's someone I really. I'll show you a picture of him later. Okay.

But, so yeah, they get in, they sneak in over like this bumpy road and it's ha ha, fun times. There is no fucking way I would sneak past those guards ever in my life. Under any circumstances I don't care how far I drove to get there, turn around and go home. Go home. Go home. My sneaking in period of my life, it's a done. It's a done. And also it was a swimming pool in the community park. Not fucking, no. It was going to see a second movie after you only paid for one.

I've never done that. I was always so nervous. Yeah. Also I never wanted to miss the beginning of the next movie. You know what I mean? It's like we just going to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thiing is. thiing is thiing period. thiing period. thiing period. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I's. the. the. I's. the. the. the. the. the. I's. I's. It's. It's. It's. Itthat. I was always so nervous. Also, I never wanted to miss the beginning of the next movie. You know what I mean? It's like, Woody's gonna pick it up. We're, no. It's not worth it. It's fine. I figured out what was going on against New York.

But like, yeah, I'm not, I'm not a breaking name kind of guy. But like, yeah, no, no, no. I'm going to Cape May, New Jersey. Tell these monsters where you're going to be really nice. They know I live in Pittsburgh. So they get in and they're like tooling around. They park the car and they go and they look at the abandoned Ferris wheel, which is so fucking. Yeah, I I remember seeing pictures after Katrina of an amusement park and outside of New Orleans that got flooded out and it was just immediately the creepiest place you've ever seen. Right. For some of you

that I think it's like it's like the lack of joy? Oh maybe. It's like where's the screaming crowds? The lights and their lights. Yeah, right. Your brains me like oh this is wrong something is wrong here. Right it's the opposite. It's. It's. the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. the. the. I. I. I is wrong here. Right. It's the opposite of what it should be. Or is it the Scooby-Doo effect? That too. Scooby-Doo did a really good job of playing on that in your brain. Absolutely. Yeah. That end ghost towns?

Why are there so many ghost towns? There's no special guest star in this though. No. The guy from Wolf Creek. Who says things like, oh, spot the convict because he is from New Zealand. It says, oy, a lot. I mean. I mean. So they're like tooling around, they go into an apartment building and there's this like really poignant scene where they're standing at the window of an apartment building looking out over Turnoble over the reactor yeah he's like that's right there yeah and then they

kissed in front of it took a photo which I thought was fucking disgusting yeah but they're gonna get married you'd be divorced in like five years I'm sure of it they don't have to be now they don't have to be now. Oh, spoilers. Returnable diaries. For some reason, I just thought about the fact that every time I try typing diary, my phone auto corrected to diarrhea. I like that your phone was like, no, I'm sorry, I know which one you're talking about. I know who you are. I know who you. Diarrhea again. What am I logging it? I don't know. Are you? So I don't get that as much as I don't get making out at the end of the world, I don't get

selfie in front of hellish nightmares games. Right, they're smiling. Or like sad, like people like, people go to like, like fucking Auschwitz and take selfies. And I'm like, what are you doing? Right, it's just, I mean, it's the world we live in. And it is a garbage one. As they're leaving that apartment building, a bear is in there with them. That was great. I loved it. It was scary. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was a the world. Yeah. It was a tha. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. theea. thea. t. t t t t t t t t t t t t t t together. t t t t t t thea. the in there with them. That was great. I loved it. I loved it. It was scary. It took me by surprise. And then when it was actually a bear, you're like, oh, that's so fucking

scary. And then I was like, oh, I guess in Russia. Bear does eat you? And then I was like, don't write it down. Where is the flip where in this place you eat bear? I don't know. Unless that's that's. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the flip. Are. the flip. that's the flip. the flip. that's the flip. that's the flip. the flip. that's that's. I I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I is that's. I is that's. I is the. I is the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I that's. I that's. I the. I that's. I the. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that know. Unless that's a, are you doing like a Yakov-Smirnov big Lebowski combo joke? I think I am. Oh man, Yacof Smyrnoff, y'all think about him all the time? Me too. No one knows. They recently heard him interviewed. I thought he was dead. No, he still owns a the theater in Branson. Let's not get into Yakov's Mirrenoff. Let's do something else. We're done. That was the Yakov minute. So there's the bear that get out to the car and the van won't turn over. Somebody has ripped all the wires on the distributor cap.

The wires have been destroyed. That's what he says. They've been chewed through. Oh, did you say that? Yeah. Well, that was the second, I think the Australian or New Zealand guy was like, they've been chewed through. Oh, okay. I did have to look up what part of the car that was that he pulled off. Well, I was like, this was like, that girl does not know what wires she's looking for. That girl does not know what wires she's looking for.

Like, they don't, they're just like, let's look for wires in a car. But luckily, the fucking New Zealand guy's like, oh, that's the exact same van. Hold on a second. Is that the Texas Chainsaw Massacre parking lot? Is that where all the cars of people who have died? Oh. In this area are parked. Not like abandoned vehicles.

Right, because there was the bus that was filled with bullet holes. Yeah. That were shot out. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Because there's a big reveal later on in the movie. What is it? That they're not that they're not people that are mutated by the radiation, they're scientific

experiments. What? When did we learn that? What? What? The doctor who's got a woman on the stretcher on the gurney. Oh my god, yeah, I forgot. And he's like, oh yeah, just put her in with the experiments.

Alan, I fucking totally forgot. So I think that that's a parking lot full of cars that... That's why you were saying it was like hostile. I get it. They've taken, they've experimented on, and they've turned them into mutants. Damn, I forgot. Here's what I wanted in this movie. Monsters. Yes. I wanted there there there there there there there there there there their their their their their their they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th. th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. they're th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. they're the. they're thea. thea. the. that's that's that's that's that's there to be like, oh, that's a bear, but there's actually a nightmare hell

bear outside that's going to eat your bus. Right, right. Like, I wanted some like, I just wanted to go fucking through the roof. Like, I wouldn't have cared of it with CGI or whatever. I just wanted to go off the goddamn rails. And there's even like, there's, there's, there's, there's, the, the, the, the, the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they... they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the room and it's with their back with a the child has their back to our party but we never see what it is we never see what it was I guess it was just a trap I think it's just a doll okay yeah yeah yeah yeah because they hear a baby crying I was like could you really not afford like a baby crying oh yeah the sound was terrible in this movie. It's disappointing. I mean, I'm like, can't hear shit because of my tonightest, but yeah, it's, um, but I also

like, because they, when they chase the baby noise and that's where we lose the Russian. Yeah, right. But he seemed to think it was the dogs. Right. And they get torn apart. Can I ask a question about dogs? Who let them out? Who, who, who? It's such a shame.

We can't drop in music anymore. You all know what that sounds like. Yeah, they don't though. I bet a lot of them are like, what the fuck are they talking about? Um, let them have an eighth grade dance they went to. Dogs won't get in the water. Well, dogs not getting the water. I thought dogs swam. Because when they like get to the body of water,

they just have to like get in and the dogs all pull up and stop short. Like, will they not chase you into water? I felt like a hungry dog would chase anytoday. rabbit because rabbit dogs are hydrophobic. Sure that's fair. They didn't look like Kujo though. No, they did not have a Kujo look. They didn't have a hot mustard in their eyes. Yeah my one dog when she swims she bites the water and it's the cutest damn big ever. I was offended by the dogs not jumping into the water. It looked like it was like the scene in Lord of the Rings where the the horses are chasing the little little little little little little little little little little little little hobobobobobobobobobob. I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I the the the they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. I they're they're they're they're they're. I they're they're they're they're they're. I they're. I they they're. I they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're not. I they're not. I they're not they're not they're not they're not to they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not. I don't they're not. I they're not. I they water. It looked like it was like the scene in Lord of the Rings where the horses are chasing the little hobbit people. You know what I'm talking about? Technically they're the riders, there's a nine riders, the ring race. Are they not horses? Well they're actually nightmares, they're like

ghost horses. Oh fucks sake, you know what? And they can't crass running water. Horses are nightmares. Hors are are they are they are they are that that that that that that that that that that that we are that we are that we are that we are that we are that we are that we are that we are that we are that they? they? they? their their they're are are thoes. their horses are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are they're not horses. Are they're not horses. Are they're are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are are they're are are are are are are are are they're are are are are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are not horses. they are not horses. they are not horses. their horses. their their their their their horses. their their not h. their not h. their not h. their their their they are not horses. they are not horses. they're not horses. course it's... And they can't crash running water. Horses are nightmares. That video that we got sent of Jessica Chastain's boob getting bit by horse? It bit by boob. Yeah, of course it did. You turned your... you looked away from a horse. Never look away from a horse. Maintain eye contact at all t. Like the horse's day was ruined. Oh, come on, lady.

But you're a boob. I love that people just said you fucked up shit about horse. I know, they're like, you know what they're saying? They're like, Katie will feel vindicated by this. And I appreciate them because there's a big horse propaganda out there. Big horse wants you to think that horses are beautiful and soulful. And I appreciate all of you who are part of my revolution. Horse horse revolution?

Yeah. Oh, boy, howdy. The whole time, Yuri, in the buildup to this, Yuri is like, we can only stay here for two hours. That's when it'll be safe. Right. Also, if I only had two hours in a place before I'd start the radiation start giving me canceries, I think I would not go because two hours is a really small margin of error. From what Jim was telling me, again, my Chernobyl expert, people live there. Why? Because they're still their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. thi. thi. their thi. thi. th. th. th. to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. to. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. to. to. to. to. to. their. the up and they're working there. I thought it was just done. Just done. Yeah, that they were just gonna... Well, that's what I thought too, because when I was a kid, they were like, if this, if something melts down, 500 years. We're done. Right, that's it, right. You just have to abandon it. It's all encased in metal and concrete now. Oh, man. that's that's that's that's that's that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. that's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all, that's all, that's all, that's all. It's all. It's all what. It's all what's all what I's all, that's all. It's all. It's all. It's all what. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It So it supposedly can't seep out, but yeah, we know a lot about science

But yeah, so they're stuck there and it's overnight now and The Russian Yuri and Chris our Boy Street boy go off to find the the crying baby noise Yuri runs out Boy Street is like, I'm going with him. Why? Just stay there. Because literally you running after him ruins it for everybody else. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, what are you going to do, boy street?

I don't know. And the answer is, get mauled. Get mauled. to go find him and bring it back? They have to like drag him back. But I really I thought that the once the Australia I got Michael I thought his reaction was one of the most honest things in the movie where like the two two people are like all right well Yuri's gone we're not gonna go look for him he's like I literally have to go find out if he's alive or not yeah because if he he he he he he he he he person are you? And I was like, that is exactly what I would do.

And that's why I will die in these movies. Oh, man. So, okay, so, so one of the big emotional premises of this film is going to see if people are alive, which... Constantly going to see people are alive. Rather that I actually made an agreement after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after movie that if we are ever in such a situation we will presume the other dead and move forward. Oh wow. We have a we have a just scorched earth policy on on going back to look for one another so I think

that's important that you have that that communication with your partner before you go on any dark tourism leave me for dead. Leave me for dead don't come back looking for me when I've been dragged off by a pack of wild dogs. I'm fucking dead. Save yourself. I'm gonna make sure you're all. No. I'm sorry. Okay, if you can't make this deal with me, we're not doing any dark tourism. So like. Oh dang it. to fucking think about it. Can we just eat pie instead? Yes, but I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. But I have boy street. I have boy to to have boy to have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have boy. I have to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the're gonna have to be do it pretty quick. Because they have to be home by five for dinner. Boy Street. I love you. That's what it's gonna be called. Is that one of their hit songs?

That's the first record for Boy Street. I feel like Boy Street is probably taken on us. Oh, 100% yeah. 97 degrees. That's what mine is because it's always low. 98, I got a fever. And two Lachet brothers. Why do I know that? I gui. Cincinnati's own.

Fuck. So Yuri's dead. Yeah. And we find him later in like an industrial kitchen or something. I don't care for, I don't care though, do you? Well, someone's dining on him. Yeah. And we find him later in like an industrial kitchen or something. Yeah. I don't care for, I don't care though, do you? Well, someone's dining on him. Yeah. Who is it? It's one of these, uh, presumably Chernobyl victims, aka scientific experiment. Yeah, oh boy. I love that the scientific experiment thing is just fucking tacked on. See, I guess I thought it was like, the people were still alive and they were like monitoring what thi thing thi thi th. the th. the th. the th. the th. I the the th. I th. I they thi they thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I don't thi thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. Well, I thi. Well, I thi. Well, I thi. Well, I thi. Well, thi. Well, thi. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. the, they. I they. they. they. th. th. thi. thi. thi. heir, they th. they they're they're thi. they're they're thi. thi. they're they're thi. thi., I guess I thought it was like, the people were still alive and they were like monitoring what happened to them.

Like they, like, like these people were affected by the radiation, and it's like, rather than putting them out of the misery, let's just see how this plays out. Which is probably the more honest thing that would have happened, but my theory is that they made them scientific experiments so it's less offensive. That's fair too, honestly. Because people legit died from this shit. No, that's a really good point and actually that's well taken.

Yeah. Yeah, that's fucked when I'm thinking about it. Oh yeah. All right, then I'm fine with it. I think it's a good ending. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. that's a great. that's a good. that's a good. that's a good. that's a good. that's a good. that's a good. that's a good. that's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a good. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great th. It's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great that's a great th. It's a great think this is a great movie. On day 15 of shooting so I was like, actually. Yeah, and everyone was like, oh no. Why did we do that? Rick, thank you. You got the scientist? Got it. Yeah, get the gurney. Get the gurney, Rick. Rick, she's like, yes, my big break, Ma. So it's a lot of running around and being chased by... It's the same scene over and over again. It is, and it's all about Paul making it about his goddame self. No one would be here if it wasn't for me, Paul, I don't care. You're right, though.

You're right. But also, like, you crying about it is so abrasive to me right now, and I'm trying to enjoy this movie. You know what I mean? Paul! Paul let someone else talk. So here's a thing. If you're running into an abandoned industrial complex and the only way to get away from people is down. Don't do that. No, no it doesn't seem like the right move. And the the Norwegian girls even like down again, no. Yeah, but they do. They go down again. And down and down and down. And to your street in a range, driver street, sweeper, baby, got ready to let it go. We can't do this anymore, can we? This is okay though. I can sing the songs? Yeah, no one knows what that is. Pass it to me now. Light it up and take a puff. This is parody. It th. It. It th. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. the. the. to. the. It. It. It's. the. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. A. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. is. Pass it to me now. Light it up and take a puff. This is parody, it's all, uh, just make a funny line at the end of it.

Pass it to me, meow. Is that good? Oh, it's your cat singing it? Yeah. A cat would say meow after you passed it to him, wouldn't they? Okay, so, okay, given this new information to me me me their science experiments, the guards were guarding the science. The science. But it just so happened that on that same day, the experiments killed all the guards.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I know. Yeah. There's a lot of holes. We forgot to mention the fish attack early on in the movie. I liked that. Did you like that?? Well? Well? Well? Well, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their science. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S science. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Ga. Ga. Ga. Ga. Ga. Ga. Ga. they. the theya. the the their. the their. the their. their. their. theto mention the fish attack early on in the movie. I liked that. Did you like that? When his fake-out fish attack, yeah. Yeah. And then you see the actual fish swarming in the water. I like it. I like that toothy fish. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It did make me think of the three-eyed fish from the Simpsons. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It did thi th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi th picked off one by one at this point.

Right, but we don't really see what it is. Well, sometimes it's dogs. Sometimes it's the dogs. Sure. Which is, honestly scarier to me than science experiments. Science monsters? Yeah, science monsters. There's one point where they're in the van and the van's getting like rocked. And you just see like shapes moving outside. Like pale faces, actually, yeah. And that's when I wanted to be like something huge.

Like, I guess I just wanted to watch Cloverfield, it turns out. Yeah, because it would be hard to like hide something huge in that, in that. It's an abandoned city with tunnels in it though, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th,nels in it though. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, just tunnel times. They didn't have money. They shouldn't have money. They should have flown two fewer people over there. They should have gotten some extras from locally, you know, like. Why aren't these four Russian dark tourists that are going right? They just should have had some sort of budget for effects. have drastically improved this movie. Sure. Yeah, this isn't paranormal activity where like just like seeing nothing move something is

going to be scary. I went some god damn monsters. Yeah and we deserved monsters. Yeah. And but instead we got a lot of tears like Zoe screaming after, he was your boyfriend for a month. Pick yourself up Zoe. you barely knew him. You know?

Yeah, but you get yourself one of them New Zealand boyfriends, you're gonna want to hold on to him. Not that one. He was like such a stereotype. If he had pulled out a hacky sack, I'm like, of course you did. And then she dies and it's like, oh, not a moment too soon. I like, and th, and th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. And th. And th. th. th. th. that, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, you, you tho, you, you tho, you, you're th. Yeah, you're th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, thi. thi. tha. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. tho. tho. tho want them all to die because Shh. Because if he's, shh, everybody.

The problem is that Paul lives way too long and just keeps talking and talking. I'm trying to emote and it's like, hmm, don't make him do that. And then he speaks Russian, we've been told. Yeah. At the end, when the, um, like the armed forces or whatever have the guns on him, he's just screaming at them in English. And I was like, dude, you speak, we've seen you speaking Russian. You've used your Russian skills to diffuse situations prior.

And then he just gets shot because he's yelling in English, presumably. Okay. Because otherwise you'd think they'd want to experiment on Paul. . they'd want to experiment on him too. Sure, who wouldn't want to experiment on Paul? He's a specimen, a specimen. What? He's a science specimen. He is. He's the specimen bestman. So we are left with Natalie. Is that her name? I called her young and the wrestlers. Olivia Taylor Dudley. What else has she been in? Oh, um... Well, Katie, you'll like to know that she was also in the Anna Nicole Smith story as dancer.

Okay, I like that. Oh, you'll remember her as Susie's girlfriend and remembering Phil. That was a bad one. She's in Chillorama as Nurse Unger. you'll remember her as Susie's girlfriend and remembering Phil. That was a bad one. She's in Chilorama as Nurse Unger. Mm-hmm. Dude Bro Party Massacre 3 has Motherface. She was starred opposite David Dukovny in the second season of NBC's Aquarius. David Ducovney is on an NBC show? 2016? Apparently yeah. She's on CSI my I AME so she's with your other friend. David, do companies on an NBC show? 2016? Apparently, yeah.

She's on CSI Miami, so she's with your other friend, whatever that guy's name is, it pulls his glasses down and screams. What? What? What are you talking about? There's nothing to see inside Miami where he's like, yeah, lock them up and like his glasses come down and go, wow! What are you talking about law and order and Dick Wolf?

That man gets so far with the name Dick Wolf. Is that who you're talking about? The guy who was on NYPD Blue and then was on CSI Miami or one of those shows and he never I'm sorry. No, no, why would you? Why would you I said the one kid look like Malcolm in the middle no one knows anything the fuck I'm talking about he did you look like Malcolm in the middle head he was this those eyebrows something was wrong with his eyebrows that is not going to cut in Boy Street I want to be clear

pluck those brows. Yeah, clean yourself up. Oh, so Paul and Natalie have been getting radiation burns because they are now in the fucking reactor. Yeah, they do go inside the reactor, which I think would probably just whoopp it pretty quickly, right? Yeah, I think you're going to get pretty quick looked. Also the technical term, the Chernobyl, get whooped. That's the sequel to Kibum. Yeah.

Yeah, so the doctors are like, put her in the room with the experiments and then, wow! They all attack her, I think. Why were they not just attacking each other? Like, what were they doing in there? Because she's human and they're not? Aren't they? So they're not they they they they they they they they they they they they're not going they they they they they they they they they're not going they they they they they they're not going they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're not going to they're not going to to to to to to and they're not. Aren't they? What? So they're not going to experiment on her?

They're just going to feed her to them? I guess so. She's probably so irradiated with this point. Just get groceries. You have a car. You know? Yeah, fucking. their nooodles. proposition only feeding your monsters humans. Once they get a taste for human.

And then the most unpredictably 2012 thing happens, Marilyn Manson's song starts playing. It's just so late for that. And it was like him just be like, no, ma'am, man, no, it was a cheap one. Marilyn. Can I have any energy from you today? Marilyn. What is his real name, Brian?

Brian. Can I at least get a mo'er out of it? No, da da da da da da da da da, da, da, da, I think it is. Back in your lunchbox collecting days? Shut up. He was a big lunchbox collector. I didn't know that. I wasn't.

I thought you were making fun of me. I wouldn't do something so lame. I collect therbuses. They're harder to find. Katie. Alan. Ratingspace. Honestly, I watch this after Susperea,

thought it was way better. Way better. I think this was a movie made with a lot of intent. I think it was made with a good eye. I think they did a lot with, you know, what money that they had, and I wish they'd had more money to do more. The acting acting acting acting acting acting acting acting acting th acting thi acting thi acting thi acting thi acting thi acting thi thi thi thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'd thi. I'd thi. I'd th is th. I'd th. I'd they's they's they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. I'd to thi. I'd thi. I'd to to to the. I'd to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. I'd to the. I'd theat. I'd the. I'd the. I'd th do more. The acting is bad but not in a distracting way. Yeah. It was fun actually I thought kind of. Kind of. I mean just I think it's really just it's the proximity effect to watching something that made me so miserable as Asperia

and then to watch this and big that's pretty good. Yeah it's a shitty horror movie. Yeah, shitty horror movie felt like just like a glass of bubbly, you know what I mean? It was really, it's really nice. Yeah. And the more I talk about it, the more I think I loved Chernobyl diaries. Um, six and a half. That's so high for this movie's this period. Totally checked this movie up.

I love it. Do you think this movie was, I guess, it's funny too, because when we were talking about what movies to do, I was like, man, I feel like fucking ripping into something. Let's do Trinobal Diaries. And you were like, perfect. And then, I was like, hmm, and then I it's fine. I'm ready to start my week, you know? Yeah. So six and a half. Yeah, is that, that's too high. It is, but I like it.

It's where I am though. So, I thought this movie was fine. I feel like if this movie, this movie is like, it's a fucking B-Hara movie, go, we're th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thuu. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's like, that's like, that, like straight up. Like, no Chaser, B-Hara movie, go, we're done. It's, it's, fuck, like an hour and a half. It's perfectly acceptable. It's a free movie on Netflix, basically. Yeah, fuck it. I'm gonna give it a solid five.

Yeah, you're fine. Yeah, toovell. To the novel diaries, you're fine. You're fine. Chernobyl diaries, you fine. I thought HBO would have a bigger budget for this. I know. But, you know. Well, the way everyone was raving about it, I just thought the acting would be better. I'm going to watch that show, but I'm like stealing myself for it. Yeah, I'm not.

There's no way it's a favor to ask you. We were contacted by a PhD student who is doing a dissertation on sort of like queer studies in horror. Yeah, I think so. That's a good way to put it. So what they need you to do is take this survey. It's a link, so we'll put the link in our show notes for this episode and we'll put it on all of our social media as well so please

go find it and really try to help this person out because they are a lover of hoar and doing some really interesting research. Yeah, we say a lot of dumb stuff on here so having somebody do the smart side of things. Yeah, someone someone someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. Someone. to, someone. to, someone. to, someone. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the they. they. they. they. their. So, th. th. th. So, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, we, we'll, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the. the the. the tho. the the. the tho. tho. the the tho. th. th. th. th. Someone should do the smart side of things. So yeah, we'll put that link up in places where you can find it. Please just go and take the survey. It'll be open for probably through the rest of the month of June, possibly a little bit into July and we'll keep reminding you about it. And you can also follow them at Queer for them. their for I like that. Super dope. A lot.

Do you want to do a mail bag? Sure. This is from Jake T. What horror movie do you think you could manage to survive until the end? Oh, fuck. What a survival? Like, can I just walk away from the situation until everybody else is dead? I just got my answer. Yeah, Jaws. I'm not get th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. thin thin thin, thin' thin' thin' thi thin' thin' thi- I'm not thi- I'm not thin' thin' thin' thoom, thoom. thoom. Do tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho' thoom? Do thoom? Do thoom. Do tho-a. Do tho-a. Do tho-a. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Doe. th. thi? Do thi? Do thi? Do thi? Do the? Do the-a. Do the-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a' answer. Jaws. I'm not getting in the fucking water you assholes. I'm out. I'm out. I'm going

inland. Yeah. Wow. All right. All right. All right. I didn't mean to step on your question there. But as soon as you said, avoiding the danger, I thought, well, that's easy. Yeah, that is really, yeah. So I'm also going to say, ultimal squalow. Orca? I'm just not going to get in the water. Yeah, I mean, that is literally the perfect answer to this question. I think you fucking nailed it. Thanks. I'm going to say the thing. I think I'd be able to make it without me. You think so. Yeah. Damn, dog. I think I could do it. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I'd. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I mean. I th. th. I mean. I mean. I th. I mean. I that is. I that is. I that is. I that is. I th. Yeah, I think I could survive the thing. Yeah, that's a fun question. Thank you, Jake.

Jake T. Jake T. Katie. Alan. Let's do another horror movie next week. We're going to do a movie called The Woods by the director, Lucky McKee. I feel like every time you've said his name in previous episodes, it's been with sort of like a Lucky Charms accent, which I would I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I would I I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would like I would like I would like I would like I would like like I would like I would like I would like I would like I would like I would like I would like you to do again please. I have to say Oblagora first though, Oblagora look at McKee. You've got a warm up. Warm up however you got a

warm up. I'm sorry to all of our Irish listeners. I know. Sorry to all of our listeners honestly most things that we do are offensive. I think that uh I think this movie will the Woods will be an interesting A B situation with the remake of Susperea. Oh, okay. That's all I'll say on that. Okay, okay. But it's like his imagining of Suspireya, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a sort of retelling-ish, but not so straightforward. And this is the guy who did all cheerleaders die, which is a film that I loved. Is that a Lucky McKee movie? Yeah, I'm sure of it. Because it was so good. Yes, he also did a movie called May that got a lot of accolades back in the day, because it's like a maybe feminist retelling of Frankenstein.

It's interesting. But not to be confused with Ma, with Octavia Spencer. No. That's Al I think now. It is. Yeah. Yeah, I mean it looks bananas, but I'll wait for video. For sure.

That's not a hidden theater. Yeah. Yeah, we're going to run it for red box. They still have those, don't they? They too. That's how you're going to get killed in the thing, though, isn't it, Alan, hugging a red box? I love you, Ma.

Oh no! No! No. No. So it's on a streaming on Prime. And you can get us on the internet. Don't forget to do that survey. Give us reviews if you use the app podcast or public, baby I'm going to see it. And if you have any fun questions, send them our way? Yeah. And we'll see it. We'll talk to you next time. We'll see you the next time. I don't know why I'm changing up the outro for this.

Pace. Thanks. Thanks for listening to another episode of Wearable Ambulance. By the next time we'll see you at th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. thi. th. th. the. the. the. thi. the. thi. the. thi. We thi. We the. We th. th. th weekends, tomorrow's. What? I don't know. I'm tired. Good night. Bye. Clear. I already said clear. Nice. Nice. the