Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 264- Deep Blue Sea (1999)

Episode Date: January 20, 2020

In this week's episode, we are thankfully done with the space rock block but are somehow STILL in the 1990s! We're talking about the film "Deep Blue Sea," the 1999 killer shark vehicle picked by the winner of our YouTube sweepstakes, Jermaine Howard. Special topics for your consideration include: shark science explained, a lil bit of poetry, feeling joy at a main character's death, a lovely rousing speech by Samuel L. Jackson, and loving LL Cool J but feeling a bit less comfortable about Thomas Jane.  Are you into the concept of ocean creatures being murderers? May we recommend Episode 41- "L'Ultimo Squalo (The Last Shark)," Episode 193- "Orca" and Episode 247- "Piranha"?  We'll be bringing back the video next week to tell you about our upcoming plans for February.  But if you just can't get enough of us, you can get our faces printed on a t-shirt, throw pillow and more at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance. If our faces aren't doing it for you, may we suggest Brian from "Wings"?? Have you seen this one? What did you think? Let us know your thoughts at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at [e-mail] and if you're feeling super generous, leave us a rating and a review on Apple podcasts or wherever you can. Or hey, just tell a friend about us. Thank you for helping us continue to grow.  Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. 

Kitty. Alan. If you'll allow me, I'd like to read a little bit of my poetry before we start the podcast. I have been hoping you would ask. My hat is like a shark's. Deepest, bluest, my hat is like a shark's fin. Deepest, bluest, my hat is like a shark's fin. Deepest, blueest, my hat is like a shark's fin. Deepest bluest, my hat is like a shark spin. Deepest Bluest, my hat is like a shark's fin. Deepest, bluest, my hat is like a shark's fin.

Deepest, bluest, or my head is like a shark's fin. I, I should be honest with the all. This is the lyrics to Deepest Blueist by L.L.J. You plagiarized that, and you told me it was you. Wow. Like, LL Cool J is a respected musician. I mean, what happened here? First, what, three, four happens by that guy? Killer. Top notch. Pop, hip hop. So good. Round the way, girl. Yep. That one song? Mama said, knock you out. There's one. What's the song where he says, I'm the type of guy who says the pudding is delicious? The pudding is delicious. I love him so much. Yeah,

he seems like a good guy. How could he write this song and then perform it? Classic Lip liquor? Classic lip. That's thi. That's sort of his th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, th, th, th, tha, mama, mama, mama, mama, thu, thu, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, mama, th, th, th, mama. Mama, th, th, mama. Mama, th, mama, mama, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, sau's tha, sau's tha, sau's tha' tha' that's that's that's that's that's tha, tha, tha, tha, this song and then perform it? Classic Lip Licker. That's sort of his acting style though, isn't it? Just lick those lips. My favorite verse of the song is, it's so good. Struggling to flow with the hemorrhages in your throat, oh my god. Getting the lap dance while I smash your boat. In the fixt that's not real. In the fiction of this song he is a man who can turn into a shark. Yes. Deep as blue as my head is like a shark spin. Yes. I want to know is he the one getting the lap dance while he smashes the boat. How is he smashing it as the shark or is he just driving his boat into your boat while also getting a lap dance?

Could you give a shark a lap dance? It just... Does a shark have a lap? There's so many questions. Can a sharp smag it? Ah, let me smang it, girl. Let me smang it, girl. Let me smang it, shark. Smash it and bang. Well, I'm glad we got that out of our systems.

Oh, don't worry. I went through my notes earlier. They are almost exclusively L.L.CoolJ. Related. Oh, good, good, good. Tell them what we're talking about. Tell them who we are. What are we doing? I'm Alan.

I'm Katie. This is where Wolf Ambulance. We're talking about the sweepstakes winner's choice of Deep Blue Sea. Thank you, Germain. Germain Howard, everyone. Lo Cooljjah, thu. I thought I was going to be hitting Deep Blue Something real hard in this episode, but Ella Cooljay is just the gift that keeps on giving. I even, he gave us so much gift that I even forgot that you brought up Deep Blue Something.

So this film opens on 90s, teens on a boat, I guess, with very nice bods and a lot of Ticatte. Yeah, on their fuck pontoon out in the ocean. Boats are gross though. I mean like fucking on a boat is gross. It's probably smells fishy. Don't you think? I think it would be weird. I definitely am not down with having your foot in the ocean when it's dark outside. I think that's a mistake. I think everyone should know that's a mistake. Yeah, yeah. I'm also not down with when you're doing a shark movie and the underwater shark shot and the music is going, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Oh, that didn't just like build tension for you? It wasn't just like a really innovative way to do that. I'm also not down with putting your boombox on the edge of a boat. Like fucking put it on the floor, you dofess.

The fish don't want to hear what you're listening to. But also when something hits your boat, it's going to go right over the top. Put your boom box on the floor. I did laugh really hard at them all falling out of the boat when the shark get it. It was like,, boom, boom. Hey, hey, hey. Which is basically how Thomas Jane's shark hunter gets the shark back. God bless you, Thomas Jane.

Can we talk about Thomas Jane for a second? I feel like I need to get something up my chest. Please. I feel like very ashamed to be attracted to him. Why? He's a very attractive man. No, he's so corny. It's hard to watch him act. Is it the dyed with lemon juice hair that he has in this movie? No, it's just something in his like pouty-lipped demeanor. He's so corny. Yeah, yeah. But he's also very hunky. He's got a hunky. He's a a a the the the he's got a he's got a he's got a h's a huky he's a huky he's a very he's a very he's a very he's a very he's a very he's a very hea hea hea. He's a very hea hea hea hea hea. He's a very very hea hea-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-hea-hea-hea-hea-hea-hea hea hea hea hea hea he's a very he's a very he's a very he's a very he's a very he's a very th. He's a very th. He's a very th. He's a very th. th. th. th. tha-hea-s. tha-s. tha-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa-sat-s at thattra-s. tha-s. tha-hea-hea-hey-lipped demeanor. Yeah. He's so corny. Yeah. But he's also very hunky. It's got a hunky-corny quality that's really nice. Yeah.

There's a lot of attractive men in this movie. You got L.O. Cool Jay. Mm-hmm. Thomas Jane. Stelan Scarsgard. I saw Steal and Scar's G. I saw Starran's a's a's a's the the the the the the the the the the wa's the th's th's th's the we's th's th's th's th's th's th th th th th th th th thine's a we' thine's a wean's a we' th th thine's a we th th th th th th th th th th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th th th th th. It's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thorough thorough thorough It did not do it for me. You got Michael Rappaport, famous, famous handsome man. Famous bad on Twitter, man. Is he bad on Twitter? Yeah, what's the deal?

He says a lot of things that he shouldn't. Oh no, racist shit? No, just dumb shit. Just like, I know what I'm talking. Actually, I'm actually Michael Rapport, you don't know what you're trying to go away. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, th, th, thin, thin, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tham, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th tho, th tho, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi's thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii's thi, famous famous famous. You can go away, man. It's okay. You and your pudding can go away for a little while. So yeah, we get the boat being tipped, but it's rescued implausibly by Thomas Jane harpooning the shark and holding it in place. Yeah, he's so strong in this movie. He is like, this movie sees him being comedically heroic. He is like a theeee the the the the the thoooooooooooooooo th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to Spider-Man. Did I do that right? You did? Thank you. When he is just holding that shark and I'm like, no, it would be threshing.

They thrashed. That's what they do. That shark just like tore up a boat and Thomas Jane is it? Just, just nicely held in place, holding it by the scruff of its neck, if you will. And the shark was like, oh man, guess I'll go home. Also weird that they didn't notice his boat, the party people, because his bone was right the fuck there. Was he just watching them? Yeah. Just quietly rubbing one out while they're making out. I thought that the shark's gonna show up. Thomas Jane, no, it like helps his focus

to rub one out right before he has to shoot a harpoon. Never to completion, it just keeps him focused. Oh, gross. It's tantric shark hunting. Thank you. We, then we flash to, what is the doctor lady's name? Non-American, Carrie Russell is what I refer to her as in my notes. NAKR. I mean, Dr. Suzanne, or Susan McAllister.

Okay. What is her accent? Non-American. I like listened to it and then I listened to it again and I was like, I can't make the joke here. It just has to be non-American. I was like she else no South Africa no she's not British. Hmm no no she's not like Scottish it's it's like all of them yeah she's got them all she's like I'm from Europe she is in an office with an old dude in Samuel Jackson

or Sammy Jackson or Sammy Jackson, Sam E. Jack, as I have him unknowed. Sam L. Jack, for me. Let's talk about his hair lard. Tell me what you think about his airline. I love it so much. Do you? You want to roll around in that hairline?

I love his hairline, and he's later on the floating Alcatraz, as he calls it, and is dressed like he's in boys to men? Yes, I love that look, and I fucking love boys to men. Just kind of like a baggy, polo, sweatshirt with a collar shirt underneath and... He looks great. He looks very good, very good. It's a shame that that floating alcatraz will be the end of the road for him. I can see myself to the, I'll just... That was beautiful, you know I loved that. I know. Man, I saw Boys to Men a couple years ago.

They were so good. There are three-piece now, right? Yeah, the one, the other guy's gone. Sure, they killed it though. Oh, they killed it. Although when they did Motown, Philly, everybody booed, and I was like, why, though, Pittsburgh? You know why? Because of Philadelphia? Because they mentioned Philly and Pittsburgh has this like... But why?

I don't really have beef with Philly except they're all assholes. Except for those of you who aren't, thanks, guys. Anyway, yes, he's dressed like poised to men. In like the best possible way, it looks so good. So she's about to lose her funding, but then she's like, give me 48 hours. I got this shit. Yeah, and he's like, oh, I guess I'll go with you. And she takes him to this facility in the middle of the ocean that they built with the company's money investment, but they were never informed of it. I think they would be informed of this large-scale facility that everyone is working at.

At least a billion dollar facility. Oh yeah, he's like, wow, look at this. And she's like, oh yeah, we built this with your money. I'm like, you're the worst of being the president of the board for not knowing about this. Aquatica research. Aquatica. the worst of being the president of the board for not knowing about this. Aquatica Research. Aquatica. Aquatica. It's no Aquarina which I think about, I don't know, once a week. What movie was that? Perana? That's Aquarina? Okay, I think about it all the time. So we cut back to the Aquarina and Thomas Jane is trying to get a license plate out of a shark's mouth? Yes, which is a commentary on littering?

I thought that was just another Jaws reference. Yeah, that's fair. Okay, I'm just being too generous. So apparently he actually did swim with this tiger shark. Ew. But they wouldn't let him do it until his last day of filming had to film everything else. In case he died? In case he died. Why would he want to do that? That's why I say ooh, why would you want to get in with a tiger shark? He's super strong. He is super strong. That's fair. I guess he could just rip the shark in half. It's comedic the thigi tiger sharks are. they're so th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thak. thak. thak. tie tie tie tie tie tie tie thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. tiaa ti. ti ti he is able to do in this movie. That and how comedic these CGI sharks are. Oh man.

They're so beautiful. Yeah, they really are. And I have to say in terms of CGI, this movie really let me down because I feel like the 90s was when filmmakers learned how to make really big waves. Oh yeah, yeah. And the 90s was just rife with giant waves and there wasn't one in this movie. I know there was! Well, it wasn't like a big, it wasn't what I wanted it to be. It wasn't a title wave.

It wasn't a tidal wave. Yeah, yeah. That's what I wanted. Yeah. It was... You mean when this movie turns into Titanic for like a really long time? I feel like both this movie and thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, it was was thi, it was thi thi, it was thi, it was like thi, it was like th. It wasn't thi, it wasn't the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It was was was was was was was was was was was was the the the thi. It was thi. It was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it was like, it Around Wet. Not to be that guy, but a lot of this movie was filmed in the same tanks that they filmed Titanic in. Oh, I believe that. I did a modicum of research for this movie. Why did you do that?

I thought we had a deal. It was LL.L. Cool Jay related related research. That's fair. L.L. Cool J's best friend is a parent. Yeah, but his name is th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. other facts while I was doing it. That's fair. LL CoolJ's best friend is a parrot. Yeah, but his name is Bird, which I have a hard time believing because I think LLLCool J doesn't name a bird. It's true. Who do you name that bird? You know that I had three birds and they were bird one, two and three? Are you fucking the name? Why didn't they deserve names? I don't know. I don't know.

Were you a child? Oh yeah, yeah, like two. Oh, that's different. I wasn't trying to come down on a baby. But I feel like your two-year-old would knock it out of the park with a naming situation. She names everything kitty cat. The bird tells him that he has th butt all the time. Yeah, and calls him like shit ass. Dickhead. I really like a swearing bird. Yeah, that's funny. Oh, oh, he also, why did

they bother taking the license plate out of the one shark's mouth when they just fed that shark's. I guess so they wouldn't have they they they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd the they'd their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I'd their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I too. I te. te. te. te. te. te. te. tell. tell. te. tell. tell. I. I t shark to the other sharks. I guess so they wouldn't have to pick that license plate out of the other sharks. Also, does sharks normally eat sharks? Or were they surprised? Like, this movie is a little science heavy for me. But it's also a little science light in that I don't understand what's actually happening to the sharks? So they've they're actually happening to eat other sharks now. No, no don't typically they won't. So why are they feeding sharks to sharks? Because that's like the thing. They've evolved beyond sharks. They're like something besides something above sharks in the food chain. But they would still probably just eat like whatever you would feed a regular shark. I think it's that thing of like, how can we show how badass these sharks eat sharks. That didn't work for me. I was just they, they, they, they, they, I, they, they, I was. I was just, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they they, they they they they're, they're, they're like, they're, they're like, they're like, they're like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've they've they've they've they've they've they've they've they've they've they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they've like, they're like, they're like, they're like, they're like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they're like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they've they've they've they've they've like, they've like, they've like, thing of like, how can we show how badass these sharks are? These sharks eat sharks. That didn't work for me.

I was just like, does sharks eat sharks? Do sharks eat sharks? This shark is like a shark spin. Yeah, for sure. Deepest, bluest. Yeah, they genetically engineered these giant sharks, Gen 1 and two. Yeah, what was the difference? And Gen 1 was smaller. Okay. So we don't find th th th th th th th th th th th th, we, we, we, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. That's that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, thia''a'a'a'a'a'a, thi. Yeah, what was the difference? Gen 1 was smaller. Okay. So we don't find out, and I'm putting find out and the biggest finger quotes that there are until the end of the movie that they were, they had broken the Harvard Compact.

A fact that the Harvard Compact was mentioned at all in the first act kind of gave away. There's no way they're going to break this thing that no one's ever heard th of th of tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the tho tho their tho tho the their their the tho tho-a tho-a tho-a. tho-a. tho-a. th. th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi thin. the the the the thea. thea. thea thea thea thea thea thin thea thea. thea thea thi thi thi they're going to break this thing that no one's ever heard of before. Right, that they had to explain to us with a wink and a nudge. Throughout the movie, you're supposed to feel sorry for the doctor, but then she turns into the bad guy. But then they have to let her be a hero at the end. It makes me so mad the end of this movie. Okay, I won't the the the the that that the that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thr. thr. thr. thr. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. thr. thi. the thr. the.things that sharks aren't supposed to do, like drive cars. Yeah, swim backwards and jump on trampolines. And recognize guns when they're pointed at them? Yeah. And synchronize their attacks. Yes. And order a pizza on Grubhub. Take the L-Sats? Yeah. Did better than me! I appreciate that this movie gets into the fuckery pretty fast.

Yes. So we load up the Gen 2 shark so they can suck out its brain juices to make. The whole thing is they're trying to make a drug to cure Alzheimer's. Right. And these shark proteins can reactivate neurons that we're not firing before. Which if I'm not mistaken, is like, I don't, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I th, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I th, I th, I thi, I th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, the the the the the the the the thi, thi, the thi, take take take thi, take take take take, take, take, take, take, take, the ta, take, ta, ta, get thi, get thi, get thi, get thate neurons that we're not firing before. Which if I'm not mistaken, is like, I don't know if it's Alzheimer's specific, but like that's testing that they do because sharks like don't degenerate the same way we do. So it's like, this is somewhat based in science. How dare you? But it's like,'s so silly. Well it's extremely silly

because she's holding a needle with her bare hands that she puts into the shark's fit and I was like you should be wearing gloves this is so unsanitary. What are you doing? Well Thomas Jade is like lightly stroking and maybe pelvically thrusting against the shark. Yeah, was it his job to just stay in there and nice it from there? Like, chill, baby, chill. It's all good. It's all good.

It's all good. As soon as he rode that shark in the beginning, I was like, oh, this is going to come back, isn't it? One hundred percent. come back, isn't it? 100% fuck. So they, they, she sticks this needle, she runs the needle through her bare fingers, sticks it into the shark, pulls out all this goop, and then pours the goop on some raw chicken from what I can tell. Just, just dripping it right on there. There's like, no, she doesn't inject it into the raw chicken. She just fucking dumps it like syrup on pancakes.

It's a syrup tech that the kids are using these days. It's very scientific. It's based in real science, according to Alan. I mean while the whole time, Stelan Scarsgard is just talking and like quips about how he is God or something. Did you catch that? No, I did not. He like does not have a line in this movie that isn't him being like, this is, I don't know, just like a cop quip.

Yeah, he's the most important scientist of his generation and all that kind of stuff. Exactly. So they get like a couple seconds of regeneration and this chicken breast that they dump the fluid on. And uh, Stelling Scargard celebrates celebrates with the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, the smoke, th, the smoke, th, celebrates with the smoke, as you do. In the lab, with the sharks. Okay. And the sharks like, no smoking, it bites his arm off. I was really happy that that happened, and I really liked it a lot.

A, the animatronic, as much as I did not like the CGI sharks, the animatronic sharks were fucking great. They do look great. The fact that it took his whole goddamn arm off and there's just blood everywhere and I was like, yes, this is good. There are some like nice shots of like blood on tile too, which I really liked. I just I thought it was very effective, yeah. Yeah and if you read the lyrics to Deepest Blue asis, he does reference your, your arms being ripped off and you now have short sleeves. Oh my God, oh my God. That's so callous to poor Stalin Scarsgard.

I have to assume, not to go back to this, but I said I would. I have to assume that L.O.C. Is that today? Oh, shit. Yeah. Can you read? You can't. Ah, mother. All right. Hold on. Give me.

Okay, I'm done. I've got it. And sharks get a lap dance. It's just obscenely bad. So all hell breaks loose. Yeah. How does tell in scars guard end up in the... Oh that's right. So they have to meta vacuum out but there's a storm. There's a storm. Of course there's a storm.

And the... Oh, there was a birthday party earlier too that we skipped over? Who cares? They have feelings towards each other. Thomas Jade wants to bone in the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, to the doctor, the doctor, to the doctor, to the doctor, to thoes, thoes, thoes, thi thi thi thoes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the is. Yeah, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the oh there was a birthday party earlier too that we skipped over. Who cares, they have feelings towards each other. Thomas Jade wants to bone the doctor, of course he does. I think has boned the doctor and then it wasn't. I think, I think then she didn't, she was just going for Fuxies and he was there for the for keepsies. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a lover not. the th. th. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love. He's a love the the th. He's a love th. He's a love th. He's a love th. th. the the the the the the the the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a theeat. He's theat. He was theat. He was. He was. He's theat. He's. He's theeat. He's theat. He's a th. He have no fucking idea. It's not February yet. They have to meta-vac him out, they're like the coast cards coming? Yes. From another country, seemingly. Well they're off the coast of Mexico. Okay. Which I was like, is there a war war two base? Off the coast of Mexico? If in America? It did not seem right. I'm not a science, but I don't know.

I'm not a history either. So they end up like winching him up in a helicopter, and they only get him so far in the winch jams. Who would have thunk? I can't believe that happens now. And the shark jumps out of the water, grabs Stone's Car's card and just takes off swimming, dragging the helicopter and I was like like thaa into th..... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi o' th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the thi thi thi the th. thin thin' the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the an theeanananananan. teananananananananananananananananananan. theanananananneneneeeeeeeeee an and I was like, oh, this movie fucking rules. Yeah, I love this scene. I love this scene, but here's what I hate about this scene. Please.

His wife, Jan, is presumably a medical doctor, and Thomas Jane is a shark hunter, and he's like, just keep him talking to his wife, who is a medical doctor. And I was like, Thomas Jane, don't you man-mann't to me me me me me me me me me me to me the the the the the the the thain, his wife who is a medical doctor. And I was like, Thomas, don't you man's willing to her. You know what I hate it? What? The tourniquet that Sammy Jack splits on Sell and ScardsGuard arm with that woven belt that he had on? You don't like a woven belt?

I was like, that's not going to give you proper attention. No, it's, it's no, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, that's, it's, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's not. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that's the that's not. that's not. that's that's, that's not. it's not. Those things are fashion, overfunction, come on, Doc. Wove and built. I feel like that is a very 90s conceit, a woven belt. Oh yeah. So, I just have a note that says, L-O-L, that shark got him again. The shark drags the helicopter into the station. Yeah. K Killing the the thii, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. thi, thi, thi, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the only likable characters of the radio operator dancing lady. Brenda, her name is Brenda, I love her.

She does not get anything to do. She's a great actress too. I've seen her in a lot of things. Yeah, she's a Tony Soprano's sister in the Sopranos. Yeah, you're right. And she's really good in that. Yes, she should have been more in this moving. Yeah. But no, unfortunately she has to be blowed the fuck up by the shark helicopter.

It is a nice explosion though. It's just keeps going. It's definitely that 90s, like, is this base made out of gasoline and dynamite? It had to have been. How else are you going to keep it afloat? I do not know. I don't know. And this this whole debacle is wrapped up basically by the shark throwing the stone scars guard's gurney into the window and he's still alive somehow he's not drowned. It's just... Well they put an oxygen mask on him and I was like, why are you put... Oh, so you could do this later. I see, okay. Well, they put an oxygen mask on him and I was like, why are you put, oh, so you could do this later? I see, okay.

Well, it worked. I love when they, I think it's Samuel Jackson, that no, he's like, what the fuck? Yeah, the shark literally just throws the gurney at the glass. It's hilarious. There's so much shot of the shark swimming up with him in his mouth like, yeah, I'm gonna do this, I'll do this forever. I love how long it had it planned. Oh this will be funny. Yeah and it was, it was so funny. So this breaks the window and then water pours in. Uh-huh. And starts flooding the station. And knocks L.L. Cooljay down, which is a big bummer. He's L. L. L. L.L.Colje is is. I is. I is. I is. I is. I is. I is. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It. I. It is. It is. I. It is. It is. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. I. I. I. I. starts flooding the station. And knocks LL Cooljay down, which is a big bummer. He's LL Cooljay is the cook slash bartender, chef slash bartender.

How do you think he got this gig on this research facility? At aquatica. I love that he has to wear Chef Whites too. Yeah. Aquatica. It's so confusing. It is. So the next, like, I don't know, hour and 15 minutes is just people running away from sharks. Yeah, yeah.

Well, apparently this movie was written because the guy who wrote it had a nightmare that a shark was swimming after him in like a house. Oh wow. And so he was like, ooh. Oh, oh. I will make a blockbuster. This is a blockbuster, right? Oh yeah, yeah. You got the director of Cliffhanger doing this movie. Oh, fuck.

That's a beat-ass movie. I have never seen it. I have never seen it. I just assume Sylvester Stall and mountain climbing. Yeah, I've seen about probably most of it in bits and pieces and then enough to know that it's a beat-ass movie. Do you like, so everything's flooding and LL is standing like hip deep and water and a playboy comes by and he has to like pick it up and go to the center ful and like, mmm. Did you think he was going to say melons?

Big, beautiful. Melons. I was like, is he got a chicken right now? To a wet playboy. This is the last time this magazine will be useful. I hate that scene where he's trapped in the oven. That made me very upset. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's super creepy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to the the to to to to be beautiful. to be beautiful. to be beautiful. to be beautiful. to to to to tooful. to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the ti. ti. ti. the ti. the ti. the ti. ti. the ti. ti. the the scene where he's trapped in the oven. That made me very upset. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, that's super creepy. Yeah.

That's like, it does do some of that stuff really well. But the thing is, that's really spooky, him being like trapped in an oven and having to like, the shark turns on the gas, and like, he has to hatch it to hatch to hatch to hatch to hatch to hatch to hatch th, hatch th th th th th th thue, thue, thue, thue, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the the the that, that, thu, thu, thus, thus, thus, thus, thu, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th........ th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thus, thus, t. tha, tha, tha, tha. together, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, tha. tha. th. to hatch it through the ceiling to get out. But the whole time he's like making jokes about a chef being killed in an oven and oh the irony and it's like you don't have to tell me I'm watching it you know. It's like they were worried it would be too tense. For you viewers at home that are way too high this is ironic that I have to get out of here. Yes exactly and then th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and the th and th and th and th and then then then thi thi thi thi thi thi thi too high, this is ironic that I have to get out of here.

Yes, exactly. And then he straight explodes that shark. And I was like, but what that? Okay, that's fine, whatever. I mean, so he takes the hose from the oven, right? No, it's just, he just like lights the lighter and throws it at the shark. Oh, that's right. But like, not only does the oven explode, but the shark also explodes. Yeah, I mean, turns to nothing. It's so funny.

Yeah. But I will have to say like, the idea of being in a house that's full of water and a shark is chasing me, creeps the shit out of me. For sure. That's a terrifying, like, it, it, it, it, it also like, you're not going to win, you know? No. So then, I just have a note that says, lagoon, and I don't know why. Someone must have said the word lagoon. The shark eats LL's bird, which is a bummer.

Yeah, that's, he does say you killed my bird or something like that. Kill my mother fucking bird, I'm gonna guess, he said. Get that hard, R. Yeah. And then we got, my notes are all over the place and they're mostly just about L.O. Coolchay. But like Sam Jackson gives this rousing speech. I love that he starts it with, with like like, with like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th, th, th, th, thi, that, that, that, that, that, that, thi, thi, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, I love that he starts it with with like you think waters fast you should see ice. Because 14 times during this movie it's been in reference that he was trapped in an avalanche. Like who

would think that something like this could happen to you twice? I love what he's talking to LL for the first time he's like, you're like, you're the first time and he's like, yo, you were the guy that was trapped in the avalanche? Don't go on mountains, that's for white people. They have enough ways to kill, kill black men. It's so silly. So he gives this big speech he admits to cannibalism? Yeah, he admits to murder and cannibalism. And then it's like, and we will fight them forever! The first thing we're gonna do is... Shark jumps out of the water and eats him. I lost my mind. I lost my mind. I was so joyous and just...

Oh, I lost it. It's so good. I just was like silently screaming into the void. It was so good. I think my arms went up in joy when that happened. Touched! It's just so perfectly timed. It. I. I. I. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's, I. It's, I. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I to to th. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. It thi. It thi. It was ti. It was ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti. I ti. I to ti. I the void. It was so good. I think my arms went up in joy when that happened. Touched out! It's just so perfectly timed. It was really good. And he's so compelling, Samuel Al Jackson obviously, that you're like starting to get into his speech too. Like when it happens, you're like, oh!

And then, it turns out that the shark is legit trying to sink the things so it can eat them. Yeah. And I want to be like, shark, there's literally a lot of other things you could be eating. But he's got vengeance on his mind. Right, I mean, much bigger things they could be eating than this like 115 pound woman, you know? Like other sharks, because they're crazed or whatever. So the they start the shark, they have to like, Michael Rappaboard is the smart guy. And he's like, oh man, there's this like stairwell that we can go up.

But if blah blah blah blah will happen. So there's basically like a pressure issue. And if they open it and it's been depressurized, water will just look at it. They don't, they like wait for something bad to happen. And Carter is seriously the only one who can do anything at all. It's true. Thomas Jane. Yeah. Like everyone else is utterly useless and he's just like scaling the game. the game Assassin's Creed. It's like scaling buildings. the building. I I I I I. I. I. I. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. They. They. th. They. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. they. they. they. they. they're like. they're like, they're like, like, they're like, they're like, like, they're like, like, like, they're like, like, they're like, like, they're like, they're like, they've ever played the game Assassin's Creed, he's just like scaling buildings and like leaping over the rooftops. That's funny, I was going to make a Laura Croft's Tomb Raider reference with it as well.

Yeah, yeah. But it's just like, and it's also funny because it's like all these people with PhDs, and he's like the only one who can come up with any fucking plants, anything. Right. And he's just flexing, just flexing and making his pouty-lipped face. Flexing in that like body glove onesie that he's got. He was so happy he got to wear that. This will help with hypothermia. Well, what if it doesn't have sleet, huh? Yeah, right.

What if I'm just rippling? How about then? So they start climbing up, and I really love the shot of the water coming up from below, and for some reason, fire is above them. Yeah, why? I don't know. It's so silly. I don't know. Maybe that's where the tower was that the... No, it couldn't have been, because that was somewhere else.

Oh, that's true. that's true. That's true. Yeah. that's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. tho. the. the. the. th were stuck inside of it. It's a light bulb. Oh I don't know how that works. Is that what? Yeah, it cooks with a light bulb. Best best brownies cooked with a light bulb you'll ever have. So they start climbing up and the shark like lets all this water in to flood them. And Thomas Jane's like, I gotta wrestle this moth fucker or something. Oh he's got to open a door to let water out. Right, but I I I I I I the the the the shark the shark the shark the shark the shark the shark the shark th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi's thi's thi's thi's thoom cooks thi's thi's thoom cooks thoom cooks thoom cooks thoom. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, their their their their their their their their their their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, they's thi. Oh, te. Oh, tea. Oh, tea'ea'ea'ea'ea'ea'e. Oh, too's too's too's or something. Oh, he's gotta open a door to let water out. Right, but I'm not sure why. To buy them sometimes so that they can climb up. Okay, climb faster. I just kept looking and being like, I mean, fuck it, I'm done.

I'm not climbing the goddamn ladder. Like a 30-story high ladder. Yeah. And you're wet. This movie must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must must thuuuuu. been such a misery to film. You would be just be soaked all day every day. I have to assume the water wasn't cold though? Yeah. Because when L. O. Cool J. was trying to do like cold jaw, it just wasn't working. Oh no. I felt sorry for him that they asked him to do that. Can you do that? Gug, good, good, good, good. He's like, I guess. I guess. Am I'm doing this right? They're like shiver and he's like just doing a little shoulder shimmy. They're like, eh, we'll speed it up. You said lick my lips right? I got this.

Yeah. Why does he lick his lips so much? It's just sexy. Just a sexy. Didn't genuine do it a lot too? Yeah, genuine was a big lip liquor. Probably still is. It's very sexy. See, he's sexy. I really like the scene where the Dr. Susan has to, or is going to electrocute the shark and thinks to take all of her clothes off and stand on top her wet skin. Yeah, yeah, she's a brain genius. That's pretty smart. That works, doesn't it? She does. She kills the shark doing that. Okay, cool. I also like the thing with her, I love the fact that all she needed for her replica shark was the head because all she was doing was brain stuff, but it was still a 20-foot long shark. Yeah, that's a really good point. Why did she need that? Because they were just investing so much goddamn money into this company. They were like, we don't need to just buy the head. We can get the whole th th th th th th th th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They were like th. They were like th. They were like th. They were just like th. They were just like th. They th th th. th. Because the the th. Because th. Because th. Because th th. Because th. Because the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, the. the. the. the. te. teat, te. teat, te. te. te. te. the. the. the. the. their, their, to just buy the head we can get the whole thing. I wonder if it had all its other organs that she could dick around the lips but I thought this was like how can we get a woman into our underpants in this movie?

Oh absolutely and it's such a like it's such a cheap way to do it. Oh it's lingering like yeah yeah yeah but we've lost Jan by this point. It's true I think we've also lost Michael Rappappappappapp. thapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap. th. that that th. that th. that th. that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're like th. We th. We're th. the. We're to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. We're the. We're the. We're the. the. the. We're like the. We're by this point. It's true. I think we've also lost Michael Rappaport by this point. Oh, right. Because like real quick before Michael Rappaport dies, they need to prove that he and LLL.CoolJ were like best friends forever. Because it's not mentioned before five minutes before his death. And they do that fucking brohug where they like collapse hands and then like smack each. I hate it. Do you have the note, yeah, buy Michael Rappaport. I said I'm fine with Michael Rappaport dying.

Is that the same thing? I was also fine with Jan getting eaten because she was just... She was not helping anybody. No. They did not flesh her out very well either. So when the doctor goes back, she goes back for her data, is why she's in the room. She's got to get her zip disks disks the zip fucking mind when there was that external zip drive! I love it. Those discs were so thick. I still have an external zip drive somewhere in a box. Don't know what I'm going to do with it? Put a were all family-wants episodes on it and

bury in a time capsule in your backyard. People will be like, these two things were not the same time. It's the first podcast. Yeah, so her data gets ruined when she goes back to get her zip disk because the shark Elektra bites them. I feel like in the first pass of the movie that was supposed to feel like punishment enough. Right. When it is not at all punishment enough. Because there is apparently a different ending to this movie. I hope it's the one where they just don't do the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last the last's the one where they just don't do the last 15 minutes. It's the one where Tavis Jane and Dr. Susan make out on the ship as they're waiting for people.

Fuck that. I'm so glad. Because they're like teasing this romance and I was like, one, you people are terribly suited for each other. And two, she did something horrible. Theau. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th. th. th. th. th. thi and thi and thi and thi and thi and thi and th. th. to too, thi and thi, too, tooom, tooom, tooom, tooom, tooom, too, too, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the is tobo. thea, thea, thea, thea, thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. tobess. So Machiavellian. Apparently when they tested it with audiences, audience was like, mm-mm. Fuck her. Yeah. Let her die. I mean I have a note here that just says, I mean, please eat her. And then I wrote, Let Her Live because she's the pretty one. So I do love the fake out that we get next next, which is LL Cooljay getting grabbed by the shark. Yeah. But then he uses the power of Jesus to save himself.

The power of Christ compels the shark to basically let him go? After he stabs it in the fucking eye. He does stab it in the fucking eye, but I feel like they should be evolved beyond that. They don't need eyes where we're going? Yeah. I mean, whatever. Weak-ass shark is what I wrote. And also like he probably would have bled to death anyway. It's true. Yeah. So then Thomas Jane, non-American, Kerry, and L.O. Cool.J. are all like on a piece of dry land, basically, left from thethe from the facility and I feel like the movie really ought to have just ended there. Well, they've got to kill the shark before it once again hops the fence and leaves.

It was just bold of them to assume that I want more movie at that point, you know? How long is this fucker? Over two hours? Is it really? the fuzzle? Is it really? Holy shit. I think, no, probably not. It felt like such a breeze. Really? It felt very long to me. Uh, no, it's an hour and 40 minutes.

One of, one, no, it's an hour and 35 minutes. It just felt really long. I think because of this like last weird coda, where it's like the movie had wrapped up to end and then they were like, but wait, their their their th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, that, that, that, that, that, that, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, the movie who had wrapped up to end and then they were like but wait there's more. I that must be where they started tacking shit on after they were like yeah no she can't live so but they couldn't I feel like they should have just had her be eaten by the shark like I don't hate her hero turn I hate that oh when she sacrifices herself you know you know I have the note she baits herself. Yeah. And then I called her Dr.

Chub. That's funny. I like that a lot. So she cuts her palm to attract the shark and dives in the water. But doesn't even say like come eat me, motherfucker or anything. She doesn't have a cool motherfucker line at this point. No. But to be fair, I don't think she deserves one. It's true. You don't deserve deserve a deserve a deserve a deserve a deserve a m deserve a m deserve a m deserve a m deserve a m deserve a m deserve a m. the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi. thi. theat. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. to. te. te. te. te. te. te. the. the. the. the. think she deserves one. It's true, it's true. You don't deserve a mothfucker lying. And she draws the shark, Carter shoots the shark. No, Carter jumps on the shark and rides the shark. Forgive me. And then L.O. Cooljay shoots the shark and shoots Carter on the shark with the harpoon.

That was pretty funny, actually. And then blows the shark up after it runs through the fence and knocks Carter off Thomas Jane. I haven't noticed as that shark had a lot of blood in it. Because when they show it from above, it's like six square miles of blood in the ocean. And still bubbling. Yeah, yeah, it's literally like dropping a bath bomb in there. Like it's fizzing. And so then we just get a L.O. Cool Jane, Thomas Jane, hanging out, waiting for sure, the boat, the crew's coming back to hang out with them. It's Monday morning, it has. Oh, right, right, right, because they ran a skeleton crew on the weekends.

As soon as they said that, it was like, you know though. And then he has the end line in the movie, which is, take me back to the ghetto. Oh, man. I mean, it's up there with ice cubes. If I knew the head snakes this big, I would have stayed in Los Angeles. Yeah. That's actually funnier, though.

Yeah. What's the woman who was in 13 ghosts as the nanny? Oh shit, yes, yes, yes, I can't remember who it is though. She had a lot of choice lines like that too. Yeah, another person that deserved more respect than she got. Somebody asked us on, uh, I think it was on Twitter, if L.L. Cooljay is the best rapper-turned actor? I do not think so. I disagree with that assessment also.

Who would you say is better? You know I want to say ice tea, but that's not really it. I can give my answer. Go ahead. Method man. Yeah. Well, I think he's the best rapper that turned into an actor. Oh, the top-tier rapper who became an actor. I think so, yeah, yeah, because I think he's an amazing

MC. Yeah. What about ludicrous? Can I pick ludicrous? Oh, that's a good one? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, L.L. is great. Don't get me wrong. Yeah. I love his hip-h. L. L. th. th. th. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. I th. I th. I th. I th th th th th th he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I Yeah, I think I thought when we said no to LL that we were talking about, his acting chops. They're very subpar. I get more excited when Method Man shows up in something than when L.L. does. I think the only thing I've ever seen Method Man in is how high. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. He's in Keanu, the Jordan Peel of Keek and Michael Key movie. You did love that movie. I did. It was all my favorite things, smashed together. He shows up in your favorite, The Wire. Oh. Plays a character named Cheese.

I like that. Yeah. He's great. Yeah. So, uh. Thanks. That was a fun question. Yeah.

Yeah. us. Do you want to rate this movie? Sure. When it was over I was like, oh boy, I don't think I liked that very much. But now that we've discussed it, I realized that I really liked it. It was a lot funnier than I anticipated it being both on purpose and not on purpose. We've just done so many fish movies. We've just done so many movies where the villain is in the water, you know? I'm getting like a little... Waterlogged? They just... Yes.

That said, I definitely think this movie is worth seeing for fun. So I'll give it a six and a half. I feel like that's solid. Yeah. If you want a dumb 90s action movie, yeah. I think it's a hard call to call this a horror movie. Agree. But it was like a fun dumb, like thrillery action movie. What did you say, six and a half? Yeah. I'll go six and a half. Yeah. I had a good time watching it. I feel like all the cast was charismatic and enjoyable for the most part. I think this movie's getting a less favorable rating from us too because we're just so fucking

sick of the 90s right now. Oh my god, he had 90's fatigue. I just didn't realize when you pitched a space rock block. same year just about it. Jesus. And then what year was this? Like 90? 99. And then we just did, you've got mail, which was 90s. So we've done what, six 90s movies in a row? We got to get out of there. You want to do something different next week? I do want to do something different next week. What era should we go to? Why do we go to the best era? Okay. The 1930s? What do you pick the movie? the the th? th? th? the th? the th. the th. the th. th. th. the the the th. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. You th. You th. th. You th. You've th. You th. You've th. You've th. You've th. You've th. You've th. You've th. You've th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. th. We th. th. th. We th. We th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You've th. You've the the the th. You've th. You've th. You've the. You've the. You've the the. You've the the. You've the. You've the the. You've the. You've th. You've s. Yeah. Why don't you pick the movie we're going to do? We're going to do. And it's so many words. It's so many words. Sorority Babes in the slime ball ballerama. Did I get all of them? I believe so. Sorority Babes in the slime ball ball. thawrama, which is currently on Shutter. It is?

And is like an hour long, so buckle in. And it's got a fan favorite little day I'd quickly in it. And two other women who were very popular horror actors of the time. Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of the cast has been in movies that we've covered. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Do you have anything for a mailbag? I do. We recently got two reviews on the podcast app that I use, podcast Republic. I do not recommend it. It's glitchy and I often click on ads when I don't mean to, so please don't take this as an ad for Podcast Republic. Also I just accidentally clicked on a Walmart ad while I was trying to get to our reviews.

So no, fuck you, podcast, Republic. Okay, the first one is from SkyRimRunner, often contributor to the show. Always good to hear from you. Excellent, cinematic commentary and analysis can be found elsewhere. Oh. But if you want to listen to two besties talk about the horror of watching bad horror, then this is your diamond in the rough or the Savini in the pool. Pure fun, 11 out of 10.

Oh, that's really sweet. Besties! Yeah! Slam dunk. Oh, I do it. Oh, I do. Oh, I'm the wall. Why, I love it. He's with Salim. They got their arms around each other. I was like, hell yeah, Samedie. Hell yes, Salim. That's Baba Canoosh in

Fucking Fitzburg. Salims is so good. But I used to live next door to that place in Oakland. Oh yeah. And the animals that they would load in there were just hard to look at sometimes. Sometimes I'd come out of my apartment the apartment the apartment the apartment the apartment the apartment the apartment the apartment the apartment th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Some. Some. Some. Some. Somea. Somea. Some. Some. Somea. Somea'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a' to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. Ssoe. Ssoe. Ssoe. Ssoe. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. I's the. I's tole. S. I's the tole. I's the tole. Sa. I's the tole. I's truck pulled up on the sidewalk with the back door open just full of goats. So hard. What's the next review? This one is from Fatty the Santa Bite. We're talking about Butterball. Fatty the Centibite. Five stars.

The Perfect Horror Comedy Podcast. It will make you laugh out loud and look forward to Mondays whether they love or hate the movie that week. Thanks, guys, heart emoji. Then April Fool's, question, question, question mark, question mark, suggestion? Cats! 2019 for a true reviews and for your kind words. It's really nice. It's really nice and it really apparently does help other people find us, which makes us more popular and thus more egotistical.

And gets more traffic to Walmart apparently. Yeah, speaking of our egos, I forgot to tell you this, but during the week that we had rare exports as our film, we hit 65 in Finthe Finnish podcast charts. Holy shit! Yeah, we were number 65 in Finland. So that's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, we fell off the Mexico rankings by the way. We were in the top 200. We're not anymore. I think we need to do like, what's a good Mexican horror movie? Al-Qaeda. Again, go back to it. There's other movies by that director. I don't want to do them. That was the first time in this podcast I was like, oh I've made a mistake. God I love that movie. I gotta re-watch it. Probably not.

No, you're probably good. It's fine. So, yeah, come back to X-week for that long-ass movie. Sorority girls, sorority babes at the slime ball ballerama. Thank you. Go to T Public, search for wear-wheel family, and buy all of your wardrobe from there. You get underwear, socks.

Homewares, home goods, yeah. You're a werewolf ambulance branded spatula. That's cool. I would buy that for myself, yeah. Hot dog tongs. Those little things that you stick in the ends of corn on the cob to eat. That's really nice. We should think about these as a gift set. What if they were just like little were wolf pauls that you stuck in there? It's adorable. Think of us every time you have corn on the cob in your chompas. I love corn on the cob and water-and-I'm just a sloppy boy. Oh I'm such a fan. I'm such a fan. I'm th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th-I th- I'm th- I'm th- I'm they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're just they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they they're they're they're they're they're they're they they're they're they they they they they they they they they they're they they're they they they're they they're they're they're they're they're they're th I th. I thi thi thi thin. I the thin. I theat theat the. I thin. I the. I they're just like like like like they're the cob and watermelon. I'm just a sloppy boy.

I feel like you have that like coolane stain around your lips. It just turns me into an eight year old. Yeah, and we did a video for this week. And we did. So you can go watch that. It's gonna have everything we're doing for the month of February. Uh huh. We don't we Let's do it next week. So fuck that. Yeah. We take that.

Fuck all y'all. Get at us on the internet, email, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. And if you have a moment, please leave us a review or a rating or both. Actually both. I think it has to be both. On wherever, whatever platform you listen, to, to, to to to to to to be both yeah on wherever whatever platform you listen to podcasts it really does help us and it really makes us feel good so thank you for that it's really nice when people do that yeah we're famous in Finland sometimes in certain weeks let's own Mexico currently

yeah and in no other countries do we rate oh oh oh we'll get there we're in our six year of doing this. And thanks for listening to another episode of World Ambulance. Bye. you know you