Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 277- Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)

Episode Date: April 20, 2020

In this week's episode, the people have spoken. With a 51% majority vote, you chose "Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives." Because of course you did. Special topics for your consideration include: extremely rad 80s haircuts, the problem of identical male actors, dance sex, the absolute pinnacle of Vanilla Ice's efforts and some things that would only fly for a 10 year old in Delaware in the 1980s. God help us, this is our fifth foray into this franchise. Check out the others  with Episode 32- "Part VII: The New Blood," Episode 117- "Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan," Episode 141- "Friday the 13th" and Episode 259- "Jason X." And if you just can't get enough of us, you can get our faces printed on a t-shirt, throw pillow and more at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance. If our faces aren't doing it for you, may we suggest Brian from "Wings"?? Have you seen this one? What did you think? Let us know your thoughts at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at [e-mail] and if you're feeling super generous, leave us a rating and a review on Apple podcasts or wherever you can. Or hey, just tell a friend about us. Thank you for helping us continue to grow.  Theme music by Aaron "Toxic" Mortimer SoundCloud- https://soundcloud.com/toxic_dsm Contact- Facebook (ToxicDSM) or Instagram (toxic_dsm) Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. 

Hey Katie. Hey Alan. Welcome back to Camp Crystal Lake. Oh no, it's not. It's Camp Forest Green now. Oh, okay. We're somewhere else then. Yeah, um, who put up that tombstone for Jason? Some dickhead. What, like, those are expensive? I don't know. That one was pretty shitty though. Even a shitty one is expensive, Alan, I'm telling you. Okay, okay. I believe you. What are we talking about? Friday 13th, part six. I guess he's back again, Jason Time.

Jason, Jason Lives. Oh, that's the one. Yeah. I'll tell you what, it opens on a tidy little intro where random guy is telling his friend, seeing a corpse won't stop your hallucinations. They'll send us back to the institution, we'll have to destroy it. It's like, they just, like, they, they, they, they, they, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, the they just, they're just, they're just, they's they's they's they's their, their, their, their, they's they's they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they're just, they're just, they're just, they're just, they're just, they just just just just just just, they just just just just, they just, they just, they just just like, they're just like, they're just just like, their just just like, their just just like, they're just just like, they're just like, they're just like, they're just like, they're just, they're his friend, seeing a corpse won't stop your hallucinations. They'll send us back to the institution. We'll have to destroy it. It's like, they just like really get it all in one. They're like, here's the back story. Katie, can I correct you about that man being random guy? Okay. For all of our youngsters out there, that is Horshack from Welcome Back Cotter. Alan. Did you have to? That's Ron to Lillow.

Did you have to? That's Ron Tolillo. Did you have to? This, in my memory, when I think of this movie, I was like, oh yeah, that's the one that starts with Horchack. Okay, the Horshack, the Horshack years. He's only in it for about 45 seconds, so. Most of what he does is shiver. He's with Tommy Jarvis, who was in the previous two movies maybe? Okay, he had like a story arc then.

Yeah, yeah, he was supposed to be the new Jason. He was supposed to take over for Jason. Why? But it tested so poorly that people were like, no, we want Jason. Like, we're not going to get behind Tommy. Tommy Jarvis. Oh no, no, tom tomorrow. Wait, so what it can you quickly, quickly, quickly tell me why he's involved with Jason. So he was originally like a victim adjacent and I think three, or four, I guess four. And he was played by Corey Feldman. What? Yeah, so a young Corey Feldman is in Friday the 13th,

Okay. Part four 4 I guess. And like there, because there's the famous footage of him at the end of the movie with like most of his hair pulled out and just like little like Jason Tufts of hair and he's going insane. Yeah. And I don't remember what happens in five, I guess I got to read about it. Nah. There's nowhere to find it. There's no way to look that up. Tommy Jarvis kills Jason. That's why he's in a grave. Okay. How though?

Because he can't, we know he can't die. But he's dead. Well, this is... This is... This is the movie, part six is the movie that he becomes a supernatural being. I see it's the electricity that does it. Right, and I guess the maggots? So before that he was just a, just a guy. Just a, a machete-wielding maniac.

Got it, got it, okay. Well, this took a turn, this film in the franchise. Because I believe Part 5 is the final chapter. Spoilers, it is not. It is not, because as we know, Part 6, Jason's back again, I guess. You guys voted on this, you picked it, so buckle up. And I'm pretty sure I saw this in the theater. Yeah.

But I'm trying to think of how I would have gotten into an R-rated movie when I was 12. And I may have gone with my sister. Yeah. No. I can't believe they would just let her bring a 12-year-old in there. But it was, you know, the 80s, I guess. Yeah, as long as you had an adult with you. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah. Oh boy.

I mean, kitty, I was already two years into buying my own cigarettes at this point. Oh, body. You were buying your own cigarettes at 10? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Delaware. You just shrugged at me like, look at me, I'm a little scamp. Shiny shoes, govna.

Also, I'm smoking. I'm smoking and drinking. Yeah. Yeah, I can't, yeah. Anyway, Delaware, it's weird. My friend Adrian, texted me after the, bringing on an episode where we talked about having a quad at my high school and she was referring to the smoking court that used to be at that high school. Oh you had a smoking and I was like oh yeah I got to smoke at that smoking court when I was in

seventh grade the last year that it was available to teens. Oh my god. Because I was in summer school. Why were you in summer school? I have so many questions about you. I failed seventh grade. Did you, what have I never known this in all the years I've known you? Oh yeah, I was a real fuck up in school. I mean, oh, how'd you do in summer school? Yeah. Was it at all like the film summer school? Yes, I took the bathroom pass and then came back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back. the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be. to be. to. to. to. to. to. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the the the the the th. to. the the to. to. the to. to. the to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the film summer school. Yes I took the bathroom pass and then came back at the end of the movie. No, see my problem with school was like I was not

I was not dumb even though I thought I was but like so I could do all the work I just didn't want to do it. Yeah I just hated authority and being told what to do. Well it wasn't until my 40s that I got diagnosed with oppositional, or oppositional defiance disorder. Yeah, well at least you, at least you can put a name on it. Sure, yeah, and I turned out fine. I'm a well read and intelligent human being. Absolutely and compassionate and kind and also really think the core. Yeah. Except if you're a listener.

And then in which case, you're okay. You think any cops listen to this podcast? Probably. Sorry guys. You're probably all right. Right. Oh yeah. How do we get into me... Oh, oh, because I think I saw this movie when I was 12. Sorry.

If not, I saw it like right when it came out on VHS. Gotcha. Oh. I do love the spooky cemetery. I think it's a great spooky cemetery in the beginning. I feel like that is being overshadowed by the dialogue that's happening where Horshack, I guess, is like, oh man, you're not really going to open that coffin, are you? And it's like, he fucking dug the hole. He dug a six-foot deep, six-foot long hole.

So like, yeah, Chris is going to open it. Why the fuck else would you dig the hole? You know? I love that like this like early 20-something guy brought his 40-year-old friend with him to go help him take out this grade. They're friends from the institution, see? It's true. Yeah. That's so weird.

Um, also, the guy who plays Tommy Jarvis, Tom Matthewtoo, by the way. Sorry. He was in Return of the Living Dead. Don't say that name to me. I said I was sorry. But I got very pumped when I saw that guy and I was like, fuck yeah, you were in Return of the Living Dead. I love that movie. Did you get pumped? Did you get pumped when you saw him like eight more times th throughout this movie? Because every like random guy they brought out to just murder I thought was him. Like the counselor that gets killed at the beginning I thought was him. I'm starting to think you have white guy blindness. I think I'm well they all had the same hair and the same coloring and the same noses. It was 1986, we all had the same hair.

All right. I had that haircut. Well, I'm just saying, they all look exactly the fucking same. That's what I'm saying. They do. They're all like moderately buff white dudes. Yeah, with like, like, like into the middle distance, you know? Like if that's not the same guy, why does he look exactly the same? That's all I'm saying. Speaking of looks in this movie, Sheriff Mike Garris.

There's nothing about that guy that says sheriff. No, he is definitely not going to be elected. I just think, he's a very confusing character to me and here's why. The cops believe in Jason. They know that Jason is real. Yeah. So why don't they believe that any of this could happen? Like they, they, maybe I'm looking at this from a hindsight perspective where later we realize he's a supernatural being and at that point he hadn't been, but they were willing

to risk the lives of many children. So I find that very confusing and also very odd that they seem to have taken a page from the Friday or the Nightmare and Elm Street playbook of like the parents are denying this is happening. Yeah. That Freddy is real. Right. They know he is because they were there. They saw it. Yeah. It's real weird and like it's only like how are we going to make this plot go? Yeah, all right. And it is, as far as plots go, it is not one. Would you agree with that? Yeah, there is, it's just like, Jason's back from the dead. Electricity, I guess. Yeah, there's your plot.

Right, he gets stabbed with, like a piece of metal fencing or something, or a piece of ornamental metal, I'm not sure. It. And. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. And it. It is. It is. It is, it is, it is, it is, it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is, and it is. And it, and it, and it, and it, and it. And it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, the th. And it's th. And, th. And, th. And it's th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, it's, it's, it's, and it like a piece of metal fencing or something? Or a piece of ornamental metal? I'm not sure. It was like an iron fence post or something, yeah. And then lightning strikes it because of course they're doing this during like a superstorm. Which is why Horshack is shivering so much. And then Jason comes out of the ground and punches through him like a fucking mortal combat fatality. And then throws his ass at the coffin. Can I tell you something? Yeah.

I loved it. It was great. It was great. It's also just like, you know, Jason could have actually just stayed dead if they hadn't fucked with him, you know. Yeah. and just rotting and so grody. It's also just like, you know, the Jason could have actually just stayed dead if they hadn't fucked with him, you know? Yeah, if you didn't have to go all supernatural

and salt and burn him. Yeah. Ah, damn it, Tommy Jarvis. So, wait, Tommy Jarvis's friend is immediately killed. Why doesn't he just take the cops back there to see the body? He tries to, but the old drunkman has filled in the grave because he's like, motherfuckers, mothucking down here all the moth fucking. It just seems like if you go into a police station and you're like, help, help, help a body.

They're going to get to it before that old drunk man can fill it in. No because see I totally sc-keyed and got spooked and pulled his gun on him so therefore he hates him. Oh right, oh right that's right okay I forgot I said I totally forgot about that I forgot that's how it works. And then he finds out he's Tommy Jarvis, who Tommy Jarvis got blamed for a bunch of murders. So he therefore hates him and wants him to go back to the psychiatric hospital, though he just drops him off at the edge of town. Yeah, you can't just take someone to the county line, can you? I like how he's like, we're going to call the institution to come pick you up, and

then he's like, we're the grapes of wrath. What are you doing, buddy? It's so fucking weird. It is so fucking weird. I love when the old man is filling in the grave and Horshack's shoes just sticking out of the casket. He's like, he like, makes a note of it. He's like, didn't even put him back in there right. Well, I'm not gonna do it because that man has to narrate his every thought.

And he's also just like a stereotypical drunk caretaker. It's like, oh my god. He's constantly swigging off of a one-third filled bottle of something. Of something, question mark. But before this, we see the murders of two counselors who were headed to camp blood which is still operating shut it down guys just let it go no we've got these buildings for campers what else are we gonna do what can we do with these cabins so he kills the male counselor

by like running him through the pole and then tossing him over his shoulder? Is that right? Yeah. I like that a lot. I love the fake out that he does on the woman. Yeah, he's such a flair for the dramatic though, Jason does, like jumping over her head like that. When the woman's like tries to offer money and then he disappears, then he shows up behind her. And then there's like just a long shot of a sinking American Express card and I was like, is this a commentary on capitalism?

What is this? Nothing is trickling down. That's why it doesn't work. It's like there would be symbolism in this movie if someone thought to make something symbolic. Sure. And then the next scene is just the sheriff's daughter, Megan, being like, come on, Dan. Dan, he Dan. Dan, I want to fuck that guy in that jail cell. She's there with her friends, eyeliner guy, ethnically ambiguous woman, and play school my first movie. I love that they're just like the assortment pack of 80s friends.

Yep, they absolutely are. Gotta catch them all. And then she's like hitting on him while he's in jail in the jail cell. And he's like, first of all, he's in a jail cell. Second, Jason is after him. He saw him be resurrected and murder his friend. but he's also kind of like, yeah, I'm into this broad. Wood. Yeah, it's like this movie just like sent me into hysterics. Is it because you were thinking about how this movie cuts in a sales team, uh, team building exercise mid-film?

Does it? Yeah, there's people who get murdered playing paintball? Oh God! I just kept referring to them as the nerds in the woods. One, I really wanted to play paintball. Two. Oh, jeez. You don't want to do that?

You don't think that would be fun? I think it would hurt. Yeah, I mean, everything hurts. Keep in mind, I'm a giant target. There's not a lot of hiding for this. We're going to play in the Redwoods? Oh, Alan. I'm a giant.

Okay, fine, you're a giant. So one, you want to play paintball? One, I want to play paintball. Two, I love that this movie was like, we need maybe three to five more people to kill, let's get a sales team in there. And it's literally just a team of people who work together playing paintball. Playing paintball? Competing at people? I don't fucking know. I have playing paintball as a note. But we wouldn't know, would we? And they're doing a team building exercise and Jason just murders them all for no reason. Including low rent Rick Moranis. And they're all like super massaginous too.

Yeah, they're terrible. Except low rent Rick Moranis. Yeah, he's just a nerd. Yeah, leave him alone. I love the one kill where he slams the guy's face to the tree and when the guy falls away, there's just a smiley face in the tree. I like that too. I also really liked when they did the three zoom-ins on each of their horrified faces before they got killed. I also love that fucking he defted three people in one shot. Cleave, cleave, cleave. Exactly. He kept just rolling 20s. Yeah, that's great. I guess he was in 19 to 20, crit-range. Yeah, for sure, he's a high enough level at that point.

Although I think you would probably lose some levels if you've been buried a while, wouldn't you think? I don't know. Hmm. Yeah, resurrection can knocks you down a level. Yeah. I do like him also just ripping off an arm hole with holding them, never mind. My notes don't make any sense here. Now, when he gets the machete after he rips the guy's arm off, and he just picks up the arm to get the machete. That's it. And it's the chromiest machete that's ever lived. Yeah, it really is.

And then he just drops it later for no reason. Why would he leave it behind? Is this the beginning of when Jason has to kill with it? Like, because in 7 and 8, he seems to like need a different weapon for every murder. Oh, that's right. Maybe you're right. I'm an artist. I have to keep moving through. I like to work in different mediums. Harpoon gun maybe. Oh my god, don't remind me about that harpoon gun. Was that Manhattan? I think so. Yeah, a boat. What are we doing with our lives? Spending time laughing? I guess so, yeah. I did, not to jump ahead, but the end of this movie where he gets fucking drowned in the lake, and I was like, oh, I know what happens next. I know. I was like, oh, that's why he was in the bottom of the lake. Okay, I get it, and then I was like, I hate it. I hate it. I hate myself for it. that. that. the that. I was, I th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. the the the the the the to to to to to to to to the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to I know. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Why do I know this?

I was really disappointed in myself, honestly. I can't do algebra. Why do I know this? How did you feel about the eyeliner guy's earring? I didn't, was it dangly? It was dangly. Oh, it's dangly. So dangly. The eyeliner guy as a character is very terrible. So, that's how I feel about him. I love him because he's the only thing that roots this movie to New Jersey.

Mmm. He's extremely New Jersey. He's extremely New Jersey. This movie is a big fan of doing like funny cuts where like the old drunk caretaker system like, oh do you guys think I'm a fart hat? And then it cuts to all the kids going, yeah! And then like the one kid's like, well this is as exciting as it gets, we're gonna be in trouble and then it cuts to a bloody machete and I was like, first of all, funny cuts. And second, like can we not involve children children children children children children children children children children children children children children children the children the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the old, the, the, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the, the, the old, the old, the, the, the, the, the old, the, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old, the old cuts to a bloody machete. And I was like, first of all, funny cuts.

And second, like, can we not involve children in this please? Just like, can you have some fucking tact? I love the only thing scarier than Jason is a bus full of kids. I did like that, actually. Actually, there's a couple funny things I liked. I liked when the drunk caretaker looks at the bottle and says, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th... th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and says, thi, thi, thi, and says, thi, thi, thi, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi a couple funny things I liked. I liked when the drunk caretaker looks at the bottle and says you're gonna be the death of me and then it's immediately stabbed to death with the bottle. And I liked the child, one of the children was asleep reading no exit by Sartre.

My son. I laughed really hard at that. No exit is the one that coined the phrase hell as other people, right? Oh, I don't know, maybe. I think so. And I was like, is that just like a little joke in there for those of us who hate ourselves and get it? And yeah, and the joke that a like 11-year-old child is really starting to be like, mm-hmm. With permed bangs, she's having an existential crisis. Holy shit. Yeah.

How did you feel about when eyeliner dangly earring goes off to have sex in that trailer? I wasn't expecting that. They're also really... In a Friday the 13th movie? Well no, just from him. Oh, okay. I just thought he would be like the weird celibate friend. I don't know why I thought that. He just didn't seem very fuckable. But it's a very weird sex scene. Oh yeah, dance sex? Who does that? Who has the energy?

Teens? And who was that girl? She was some lady who had her uncle's winnopeink. Because at one point, she's like, I need to get back before anyone notices that I, that this is missing. And I was like, I think they're going gonna fucking notice you took the RV, Jennifer. That 30-foot vehicles missing. Where they live?

I loved when he took, he was driving the RV. Listening to Teenage Frankenstein by Alice Cooper, very, very excited about that. Yep. And first of two Alice Cooper songs in this movie. And actually I think there's more, but two I recognize. And there's the whole like comedic, her getting killed by Jason and she thinks that she's masturbating. Well, she's getting killed by Jason in the bathroom, but he's just hugging her really hard for a long time and I kind of felt like Jason is better than that, you know? Like he's a better killer than he shouldn't have to like struggle with a small woman in a small bathroom on a small RV. That's all. Jason, you're better than this. Like get it together. I know you've been only reanimated for like a day or two, but, well. So he kills her by smashing her head into a mirror.

And then he kills eyeliner by stabbing him in the head with a knife, which I liked a lot. Mm-hmm. And then there's that really, I really like the shot of him standing on the flipped camper that's on fire on the bottom. Yeah. And he's like back lit by the the the the to get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get get it to get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it to get it to get it to get it to get it to get it to get it to get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, mm-hmm, and then there's that really I really like the shot of him standing on the flipped camper that's on fire on the bottom Yeah, and he's like backlit by the moon It looks cool, but you're also like oh Jason, you're a shit driver, of course you are No one ever taught you to drive Oh, I have a note here that says sex lady has rad hair. Her hair is rad. They're also fucking with their shirts on, which I just find to be so strange. Yeah, if you're gonna have dance sex you need something to catch all the sweat. Okay I wasn't aware I've never had dance sex. Cheer sex. You were having cheer sex with him. Torrance. Torrance.

Bring it on! Um, on this movie, there's, the, like, Tommy keeps calling into the police and being like, oh my god, this thing. You're like, Tommy keeps calling into the police and being like, oh my god, this thing. You're so desperate to involve these cops who are like, go away. They keep dropping you off in different places. They just drive him to Ohio. He's like, I will be back. So he calls and the cop is out of the station because he's at the camper flipping and his daughter answers the phone and she's like, hold on, I'll come get you and then you can stare at my crotch for this entire car ride.

That was so uncomfortable. Why did they keep shooting to this woman's crotch? I don't know because I saw what it look like once. I need not see it again. Was this an Alice Cooper song the Hard Rock Summer in the USA song? I don't know if that was or not. Because that's a... He had a few songs on the soundtrack but yeah. It's an incredibly stupid song. Hard rock summer in the USA. It's just like a mad libbs of that era. It's like someone who is English is not their first language. They listen to like a Kiss album and a John Cougar Mellon Camp album and they were like I can do this. I love a hard rock summer in USA. Just like the boys and girls of summer in America. Yes, hard rock summer is by Alice Cooper.

Come on, guy. It's a dumb song. I mean, the teenage Frankenstein and he's back, the man behind the mask. I just feel like they approached Alice Cooper to get some of his songs for this and he was they were like can we have hard rock summer in the USA and he was like what? Hard rock what? I don't remember. I did who now? Fine I guess. I'm a huge Alice Cooper fan. I know. As you probably guessed. And I like this because it's during his synth heavy period? So I'm a fan of this because it's during his synth heavy period. So I'm a fan of this period of Ellis Cooper for sure. Yeah. Yeah. I like he's back the man behind the mask.

That's like on the turtles wrap at the end of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, you know? Turtle Power. Wasn't the vanilla ice? Was Mutant Ninja Turtles, you know? Turtle Power. Wasn't that vanilla ice? Was it? Or was it MC Hammer? No, he did Adam's family. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it was vanilla ice. T-U-R-T-L-E power. Got to be famous enough to be able to just give someone shit and then be like, oh, I guess I gotta use it. Why can't we be that famous? Truly. I mean, in Vanilla Ice's defense, it was the best he could do. Yeah, I mean, he put his entire effort into that, I'm certain of it. So yeah, we get the crotch ride back to the camp. Because, oh no, they get picked up by the the thed the thed thed thed their thi thi thi thi thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I guess, I guess, I guess, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I guess, I guess, I guess, oh, I guess, oh, I guess, I guess, I guess, oh, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess, I th. I th. I th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I I, I th. I th crotch ride back to the camp because oh no

they get picked up by the sheriff's department again. Right he's like the other cop radios it into the sheriff the car the car and he's like that's my daughter's car and the cop just like smirks which I liked a lot. She's got a guy staring at her crotch the whole car ride. Yeah she does and it's also the guy she just let out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I the the they. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. te. I'm. the. I'm. I'm. I'm the. I'm th.the whole car ride. Yeah, she does. And it's also the guy she just let out of jail. Or no, no, no, no, no, they had dropped him off. She lets him out of jail later. They just cannot keep Megan away from this guy. She just loves him.

She loves Tommy Jarvis. You know, it's right in these movies where people meet in a day and then like get the huts for each other and then their lives become intertwined the way that they do at the end of this movie because like you don't know if you have anything in common. He could be a Republican. He could be like a flat earther. He could be a Cubs fan. You know what I mean? Like you know nothing about him. Can we write the marriage story equivalent of the divorce of these two people who have met in a traumatic serial killer incident? I think that actually win us some awards.

And to that I say copyright, copyright. It's going to be half marriage story, half behind the mask, Leslie Vernon's rise and fall. That would be so good. Oh man. Yeah. Okay, think about it. 100% less crotch staring.

100. It was just so like, wait, is this supposed to be erotic? What's going on right now? I don't know. I don't know. Oh, those pants? That's where her vagina lives. What?

That's her vagina's a dress. What year is this film? 1986? And the first one was in 1980. They put one of these out a year for six years. Cash cow! Holy shit! Yeah, these things made money.

Holy fuck. They were huge. Yeah, I guess. Like, I mean, they were like, and this is also is also, so, 86 would have been Monster Squad too, where they're making fun of Friday the 13th movies. Yeah, like, they're watching the killer movie where he just keeps being reanimated. Yeah, that's true. You're right, you're right. Okay. Oh my God. So these were like, yeah, they had huge cultural sway, like, you know, so many kids I know like their older brother would taunt them with the ha ha ha ha kiki and all that stuff.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I like the little girl finding Jason's machete once he finally gets to the camp and starts offing all the counselors. I just found it outside. It's covered in gore. And play school my first movie is like, oh I don't think it's anything. They're just playing a trick. That woman is a terrible actor. The things she's doing with her face are like would get you kicked out of an improv class for being too bad at it and they don't kick anyone out of improv classes for being too bad at them if you would know if you've ever been to an improv class graduation. She is Tommy Yso level of like you know you're in a movie right yeah or like you are so aware that you're in a movie sure sure her other friend is wearing the most confusing

ensemble in the movie I would say. Are you talking about her friend wearing sweatpants and suspenders with a crop top football jersey? But the crop top football jersey is over the suspenders. It appears to be raw suspenders crop football jersey. Mm-hmm. The fuck. Respectfully, I inquire unto the, the fuck. As our representative from the 1980s, can you explain this to me? You never knew when you were gonna get pants,

so you always had to have the suspenders back up on your sweatpants. It's so weird, she's like, it's like her comfy clothes. She's also got slippers on, and she's sitting in an arm- the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I the. I the. I's thi. I'm theck. I's th. I's th. I th. I their their their their their their their their their their their their. I I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I's th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th threatea. th th th threate had to have the suspenders back up on your sweatpants. It's so weird. She's like, it's like her comfy clothes. She's also got slippers on and she's sitting in an armchair reading Menat Play magazine. Like, this is her relia, this is her lounge wear. But it's, it doesn't look comfortable. No! I mean, maybe the sweatshirt and sweatpants. But why on earth when you would have suspenders on like touching your bare skin? The only thing I can figure is like there was no way to keep the, like the sweatpants crammed

up her ass enough for this movie? They're like, well, we're just gonna put suspenders on those to make them, make them stay there. And just put the sweatshirt over them, maybe no one will notice. But also it has to be a midriff-bearing sweatshirt, because did you see her abs? Do you think she was like, I love these sweatpants, but the elastic is just blown out of them, so I'm going to have to wear suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders to wear to wear to wear to wear to wear suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders suspenders susp with them. I'm still comfortable, okay? I have the note, why are they kissing about Megan and Tommy? I can't figure it out. Just straight making out. So they do like a, uh, a, uh, a ruse where they pretend to get into a fight. And when the jailer comes over to break it up, she steals the keys, lets him out. I was like half paying attention. I think this is what happened.

Yeah, no you got it. The ruse was they were in a fight because Tommie grabbed her and kissed her. Right, they do an old prisoner swap, but they like have feelings when they kiss. Yeah, oh. When you feel that kind of crotch staring magnetism, like... You don't stare into someone's crotch for 10 minutes and then not kiss them with passion. I thought you were going to say you don't stare to someone's crotch at 10 minutes and not see their soul. I mean, I think that's why you kiss them with such passion. You see them for who they are. I mean I think that's why you kiss them with such passion. You see them for who they are. We're all just crotches, Alan. They only say it's the gateway to the soul. This movie has broken my brain. Yeah, I think

you mix up soul and birth canal. Oh God. Did you think that at any point Jason might kill a child because I kind of did. Oh yeah, I was kind of hoping for not an on-screen but him just to walk into that cabin and just bloodspray on the windows? Oh, yeah. I was kind of hoping for not an on-screen but him just to walk into that cabin and just blood spray onto the windows. Come on. I like the line where the one kid's. I like. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I like. I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, oh, I like, I like, I like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the and just blood spray on the windows. I like the line. I mean, fuck it. I like the line where the one kid said to the other one, so what were you going to be when you grew up? And I was like, that's so fucking dark.

That little kid has all like, when a dankly earring is like trying to explain Native American lore to him, and he's just talking bullshit. I loved it. And the kid is just like, God, this is as good as it gets. Yeah, that's when it cuts to the machete and it's like, oh, okay. This kid's like having a midlife crisis at camp. I just like hearing the line from one child to another, so what were you going to be when you grew up is legit the darkest thing I've heard this week

and we're living inside a global pandemic and I watched a tale of two sisters. So like, it is so dark. It's so fucking funny too though, like kudos to whoever came up with that. And then just like sat back and was like I I I I I I I I I the the the the the the the the th and was like, I I I th and was like, I the th and was like, I th and was like, I th th th th th thi thiing thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thiolking thiolk, thi thiolk, thi thi thiolk, thiolk, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi th. th. thi th. th. thi th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi thi th funny too though, like kudos to whoever came up with that. And then just like sat back and was like, I'm clocking out. I'm done for the day. That's a wrap on Dave, everybody, I'm out of here. So Megan and Tommy come up with this. Megan and Tommy, the most 80s of protagonists. I forgot to mention

that when they get to the cabin it is literally painted in the blood of the other counselors. I love that. Those counselors had a lot of blood and he did a great job of dispersing it. He would have had to have like just cut arteries and swung them over his head. Which doesn't sound out of line for the Jason we know It's true. It's true So the key I have a note here. It says oh he crackleacked her dad. But I don't remember what he did. How did he kill her dad?

I don't know. Uh, oh, didn't he fold her dad in half? Yes, he cracklect him. He like cracked his back, too hard. Yeah, he, oh, my autocrack changed folds to foods. Foods. Foods. the sheriff. Foods. Jason Foods the sheriff.

Great. Great. So they're going to kill Jason by drowning him? Well, it's chaos. Like, her dad dies, and then Tommy's like, I'm your dad now, get back in the cabin. And then she turns to head back in the cabin. And he's like, no, don't go in that cabin. And I was like, you just fucking told her to.

You just fucking screamed of her too. Oh, that's so dumb. Oh, that's so dumb. So, Tommy goes ontakes the kids into the cabin and then there's like, don't go in the cabin with the kids, the fucking kids. The kids. Just get the kids out of there. I know. I know.

Maybe don't bring them there in the first place because like, also like, I know there's no Google reviews or yelp or anything at this point, but like, you're going to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to send to to to to to have to be other camps in New Jersey. It's true, there are. I've been to other ones, yeah. Whoa, you went to camp? No, I've just seen them. Same girl, same. I grew up in New Jersey. Uh, so Tommy's gonna sink Jason by tying a chain to a boulder and then putting a loop around Jason's neck. By all accounts it kind of works. I mean it's how part 7 starts.

Does he get stuck by lightning again though in the beginning of part 7? I think the lightning strikes a, um, is it like a phone cable that's underneath the lake? Right, there's some utility work happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. Like, there's so many questions about part seven. We can't re-litigate that movie. Wait, which is that, that's not Manhattan.

No, no, that's the psychic girl versus Jason. Oh, right. Why was she psychic, though? Okay, never mind. It's too late. I'm not going to go down this hole. I do have a note that says, I hate when Jason walks underwater, and I don't know why.

And now I realize it's because he does it at the beginning of part seven and I hated it there. He just walks on out of the lake, like fucking Dracula. Do you have the note Megan Motorboats Jason? I don't. Also, so like that hurts him I guess. Somehow that really hurts him even though being shot doesn't. Yeah, a lot of hunks of meat are coming off of him. Yeah, I guess. It seems like getting shot would also hurt him in that case. Okay, just checking.

Baby boat propellers are the only thing there is Krypton Knight. I hope that's written into the next Jason movie. Jason at sea. Oh, wait, that was Jason Takes Manhattan. Yeah, right. Jason sails around the Pacific Northwest. Of New Jersey. New Jersey. There are no mountains, you guys. What are you thinking?

Oh, this series is just too much for me. It really is. So Tommy ends up living. We thought he was dead, but he's not. Hey, I like that Megan's actually a very quality lifeguard. She like, dives in, does the cross chest carry, does CPR? Like, all right, Megan is maybe a good camp counselor. Yeah. The children seem to respect her. And they cheer when Tommy lives. I mean.

Like, they're emotionally invested in Tommy. You're like now you guys kiss because like we've been so into your romance. But this is where it's stupid because at the beginning of Part 7, Jason is hell-a-dead and has to be resurrected. Right, it's the electricity gets him again. Right, but at the end of this movie, Jason opens his eye and then the credits roll. He has a beautiful eye. Yeah, ha ha ha. You're right though, maybe he drowns eventually.

Maybe. Oh man. Alan. And that's where I have them to, this Alice Cooper song is a fucking jam. Which one is at the end? That's the, that's that's that's that's he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he's he's he's he. He's he he's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He he he's he. He he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he's he he he he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he he's he's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's the he's I have them to, this Alice Cooper song's a fucking jam. Which one is at the end? That's the, that's the he's back, mask. He's the man behind the mask. Gotcha.

And he's out of control. Woo. You sound exhilarated. I think, even though I watched this after a tale or before a tale of two sisters, it has so much more like, it has so much less of an oppressive atmosphere. Oh yeah. And I'm just like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, shake it off. This movie is, um, it's joyous if nothing else. Yeah, I'm stupid. Can I tell you something that's going to surprise you? Yes. Let's go to the ratings face face face face th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I tell you something that's going to surprise you? Yes. Let's go to the ratings face.

I loved this movie. Oh, me too! It did not sound like it from the way we just discussed it, but honestly, I thought it was a true joy. I thought the comedy was on point. I thought it was stupid. I thought it was stupid. I thought it was stupid. I thought all those guys look the same. I thought it was great. The deaths were excellent. I liked it. What number are you going to give it?

Oh, I forgot I have to do this movie an eight. I liked it. This series is so shitty, and it gets so much shittier that this is for me something that I can be like, well, I really enjoyed that. I genuinely enjoyed watching it. I think almost like the way we've watched these in reverse is like just setting them up to get better and better almost. I like that a lot actually. It's like saving, you know, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they, they, they, they, they, they, like, like, like, like, like, like, watched these in reverse is like just setting them up to get better and better almost. I like that a lot actually. It's like saving, you know, like opening a bag of Skittles and

saving all the purple ones for last. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. That's a, and it's also nice because Halloween and a Nightmare in Elm Street are not going to give me that same thing. No. They're not going to just keep to to to to to to th to to to get th to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get thi better thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the thi thi the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the their their their their their their their their thi their thi thi thi thi thi the the the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thi. thi. to give me that same thing. No. They're not going to just keep getting better as I get lower into them. Well, I guess the first three aren't bad for Halloween. But like the third one is... You have to take three out. It doesn't count.

Oh yeah, three's great. It's Halloween movie. Okay, fine. It's not a Michael Myers movie. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tha. the. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. the. thea. the. the. the. th from that, then the third Michael Myers movie is terrible. Halloween 4, yeah, not good. Nightmare on Amnesty 4 is Dreamchild, I think, isn't it? Four or five, yeah. I mean, three is the peak for that series. Yeah, yeah, that was good. Yeah. I would give this movie a seven. It was totally

enjoyable. I really enjoyed it. Do you think this is, it's because we watched it back to back with Tale of Two Sisters where it's just like, well, this is a different, this is air that I'm breathing that I can breathe, you know? I do, and I also feel like it hit all of those 1986 horror movie things that I th.. th. th. I th. I th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, so the, so the, so thi, so thi, so thi, so thi, so thi, so thi, so thi, so th. th. th. thi, so, so, so, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, throoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooomu, that, things that I want. It had the right atmosphere, like especially starting off with like the spooky thunderstorm cemetery. Gotta be raining. And all that stuff. And having horse shack right in the beginning.

And then it was just like, it was joyously stupid. Absolutely. Well, thanks guys, guys. I'm glad you voted on that. It was a very, very close vote. So. Yeah. Yeah. Next week, we're going to do screw three.

Um. Scream 3. We're doing it. I hear it's shit, Dick. No. When we watch that, are we going to decide that they were justified in their Friday 13th part 6? I think that's a good question for us to ask is, were they right?

And we'll know. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I'm sure you can watch Scream 3 somewhere. It's a movie. I hope so. Yeah, I didn't look it up. I'm sure you can rent that. If you can't rent Scream 3 on Amazon, what can you rent? I don't know. Maybe you have to get Disney Plus to watch it. I've got it. You can just share mine. I forgot to cancel it so now I have it for another month. Oh no! I know. Everything I do is wrong. Ah.

Uh-huh. Can I take you to a little place that we like to call Mailbag? Please. Mailbag! Hi! This is an email that we received. This is from Tim K. Hi, Tim K.

He says hi. Hey. He knew I was going to say that, yeah. Love the podcast, listening from London town in Mary Old England. Wow, you're in a cooler place than we are. Congratulations. Your amazing show is a perfect companion for binging shutter Netflix. I'm watching a film then listening to the same film on your podcast. Lake Bodum was a delight.

Oh, good. He said he just, we listened to the Black Death episode and he wanted to suggest that we do the disnified version of Black Death called Season of the Witch starring Nick Cage. I have definitely looked at the cover of that movie and thought we should investigate that at some time. If it's about a plague I don't want to do it. But... No right now. No right now. We really fucked up on that one and our download numbers show it. We had just planned it, we planned it too early. So now we're not doing whole months in advance anymore. I'm glad you enjoyed the episode though Tim K and thank you so much for writing and thanks for being a

friend. The last line is keep up the strong work. Oh thank you. I I like that as it's not good but we're giving it our best, you know. Yeah, we're the vanilla ice podcast. Right, it might not be quality, but it's effort. Oh shit. You think we can get that on a shirt? We can upload anything we want. It's sure, I'm just gonna draw that and MS paint and fucking throw it up there. Oh God. So yeah, next week we're gonna do Screthream. I think it'll be fun. Isn't it? I'm sure. It'll be fun. Apparently, Courtney Cox has terrible bangs in it, I'm looking forward think it'll be fun. Isn't it F. Campbell on it? It'll be fun. Apparently, Courtney Cox says terrible bangs in it, and I'm looking forward to it.

That is something to look forward to in this time and place that we're in. Thank you all for being so kind to us. I hope you all are doing well. Yeah, reach out, let us know how you're doing. You can email us, you can get us on the internet. It would be cool if you left us a rating in review. We came so fucking close to being number one in Finland. We were number two in the film reviews category for Finland. We were so fucking close. I'm standing behind the amazingness of a low podcast from Pittsburgh, pig number two in Finland. That is insane!

All right, I'll take it. Yeah, that's pretty to. All right, I just wanted to be number one, Al. We charted on like comedy in Guatemala briefly and I was like, what? Guatemala needs a laugh right now. Everybody needs to go anywhere they can. Anywhere they can. And then they were like, not this and we immediately fell off the charts.

I love it. I'm so proud of us. We are so stupid. Just keep on being stupid. It's good to be able to be stupid. Oh, it feels great. All right, that said, screw threem. And thank you for listening to another episode of Wearwulf Ambulance.

Bye. Bye. Bye. I