Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 354- Dolls (1987)

Episode Date: November 8, 2021

In this week's episode, we're taking a break from the new and popular films of peak spooky season and discussing a piece of work that just stinks of our old friend Charles Band- the 1987 film "Dolls." Special topics for your consideration include: questionable parenting choices, the perks of being a manchild, a celebration of a different film that truly never stops amazing us, movie punks, nip slips, child support, tiny knives and an extremely prescient dream. I know Stuart Gordon directed this film but frankly I like Charles Band better, so let's talk about movies that he's had a hand in: Episode 156- "Gingerdead Man," Episode 164- "Puppet Master," Episode 165- "Puppet Master 2," Episode 171- "Ghoulies," Episode 186- "Tourist Trap," and Episode 199- "Terrorvision." Somehow we have never tackled an "Evil Bong" film so uh...stay tuned for that, I guess?? Find us online: Support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and get bonus episodes about action movies-- this month it's STALLONE-A-PALOOZA with the (probably) fine film "Demolition Man"! Buy merch for yourself or those you love at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance on Twitter @werebulance on Instagram @werewolfambulance. [e-mail] If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously, we have the best listeners, hands down. Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. 

Katie. Alan. Welcome back to the Charles Band of Verses. I love Charles Band. I think that I, while watching this movie and realizing I was just, I had like a stupid grin plastered across my face. I was like, oh, I love Charles Band. I love Charles Band.

I think I, I think I, while watching this movie and realizing I was just had like a stupid grin plastered across my face. I was like, oh, I love Charles Band. I love semi-plotless movies that are like, I've got an idea. Okay, let's go. I've got an idea and maybe like puppets or dolls or mannequins? Great. With, I don't know, maybe tiny people inside, who knows? We'll see what happens. Let's make a film.

And that's exactly what happens. This movie is directed by Stuart Gordon, who is referred to as Stuart Gordon Little. And I was like, do you mean Stuart Little Gord? Never mind. Never mind. Just don't even do it. And this film starts with shitty parents almost hitting movie punks on the road. Yes. The parents are so, don that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's is is is is that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's almost hitting movie punks on the road. Yes, the parents are so shitty.

Like, comically shitty. They're 80s shitty, which means they're just abusive monsters. And you are just rooting for their deaths. Oh my gosh, yes. You cannot wait to watch them die. And this, there's, the opening credits are over these bat shit-looking dolls. Yeah, they're really something. And I was just watching it like, oh I'm Charles Band, this fucking stinks of Charles Band. And has a stink all over it. Oh, we could do an animated thing here, or you could just hold dolls heads up. Got it. Got it.

Done and done. Also one of the movie punks is holding a snare drum? And then I thought do you just have your clothes packed in the snare drum case because that's weird. Uh-huh. Yeah. So the dad says to the, or the husband says to the wife, you almost hit them and she says, want me to go back and try a second time, which which, which, which, which try, which th, which th.. th. th. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the th. th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the to to thu. to to to to to the to says want me to go back and try a second time which I thought was very funny. She is Cruela DeVille without the hair she is just like the most monstrous human that's ever walked to the face of the earth. I mean this goes along with Mike can I wear a wig but do you think I can wear a turban? 100% really? Yeah Nick Cannon the Cannon thinne Nick Cannon can, why can't you? Because I am not, sir, Nick Cannon. Nick Cannon is a personal friend of mine, and you are not Nick Cannon. No one speaks to Nick Cannon that way.

He's whiling out. Yeah. They're lost, and he says to her, maps bore me. Was he giving you William Cat vibes? Yes, I thought it was. I looked it up. And then I thought it was Marjo Gortner. Okay.

You remember Marjo Gortner? Can I forget? I think about Marjo-Gorton. All of the times. That's Demon Titus. He's trying thing on her. Judy's got a face like an adult. Little Judy looks like she's paying taxes.

Adorable taxes. She's like, don't swear. My mom says it's not nice to swear. And I thought about how I let Lucy say one swear word a day. So often in the evening, she'll be like, can I say my one bad word? And I'm like, yeah, go for it. And she'll be like, son of a pear bitch.

I laugh and then it's over. And I really think it's good parenting. I think it is too. She just keeps substituting words in there where she'll be like, son of a koala bitch. That's sooing. And she's just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just a the the tha ca ca tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thoom c, thoom-s thi thi thi. thoom-s thoom-s thoom-s thoom-s thoom-s thoom-s thoom-s tho-s tho-s tho-s tho-s tho-s tho-s thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi-s thi-s thi-s thi-s thi-s thi-s. tho-s. thooo-s. tho-s. tho-s. tho-s. tho-s. tho-s. tho-s. to make you laugh. Yeah, yeah. She's got excellent comedic timing. Oh yeah.

When she says that to her father, his response is, well, it's good thing your mother's not here. Yeah. And she's like, God damn dog. And then she says to Rosemary, you're not my mother. And Rosemary goes, thank God. And then one of them tham tham tham tham the tham the tham says tham says tham says tham says tham says tham says they says they says they says they says they says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says says th says tham says tham says, thi says, thi says thi says, thi says, that's says, that's says, that's says, that's says, to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that that that that that that. that that that that that to to to to to to to to to thi of them says, I'm going to kill that kid, and the other says, stand in line. And I thought, I'm a wonderful mother. I've told you my defense of Stuart Gordon before, right?

Which is the movie Stuck, where he retold the story of the man who was stuck in the windshield of someone's car and died in their garage. Did we just do something Stuart Gordon did? Because I feel like you told me the story recently. I don't, maybe, I may have just been on one of my defending Stewart Gordon ran. Sometimes you do that when no one's even talking about Stewart Gordon, huh? Yeah, politics are cool. You guys ever talk about Sturton. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. tho thi. the the thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story. St. St. St. St. St. St. St. St. St. St. th. St. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. S. S. S. Se. S. Sote. Sote. Sote. Sote. S. Sote. S. S. S. Sote. S. S. S. S. S. S. S.'s pretty dope. I don't know why I'm yelling, we're not at a party. Wait, he wrote the dentist. Did you know that? I don't know if I knew that or not.

I don't think I knew that. Oh boy, that's okay. That's a good one. That's a funny one. That's a comedy. Oh, he worked on with Brian Usma who also worked on this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh boy. He's deep in the Charles Band camp, right? Yeah, I wish Charles Band had worked on the dentist. I'm sure his fingers were somewhere in there. I hope so. I hope he was consulting. So they, their car gets stuck and they spy a, there's a thunderstorm coming up. And they spy this manse that they're going to run over to. Which is all all all all all all all all all all all, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. to, to, to, to. to. to. to. to. thi, to. to. to. to, to, to, to, to, to, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, to, to, to, to, to, their. their, their, their, te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. this manse that they're going to run over to. Which is all these things. I was like, I would walk for miles before I went to someone's house. Yeah, absolutely. Because like even if they let you in, then you're in their house.

I live in America where people get shot for knocking on doors all the fucking time. Even if it works out well, you still have to make small talk. Oh my god, I've been to say... Also, this is the plot of the film Knock Knock, by the way. Oh, for sure. We were talking about this recently, but I saw a news article yesterday where a man was hiking and got lost in the woods and didn't answer the rescue calls that were coming in for him because he didn't recognize the rescue calls that were coming in for him because he didn't recognize the numbers.

He's fucking kidding me. And I was like, I'm pretty sure we have joked about that on where we'll family lives. That sounds like something we would describe as absolute satire. Oh, Lord. I'm going to go on a limb and pick it up. Just see what happens. See if it's, I mean, what else do you have to do? He's like, ugh, ignore. Oh no, I don't have a warranty. Leave me alone. Were they leaving voicemails? Were they texting him? Like, what is happening here?

Oh my God. So they get out of the car and start walking and for no reason Rosemary throws Judy's teddy bear away? Crazy. so mean. And then we see that Judy has the wildest imagination of any child ever. I was like, oh, I hope Teddy gets his revenge as a joke. And then all of a sudden there's this enormous beast with plastic teeth and no neck, just like, ah! Like a wild ass Chubaca, just killing this family. He ate her arm. I love Judy. You are sick in the brain. But I really, I really like to like, first it's like this adorable like 10 foot tall

teddy bear and then there's like a monster inside of the teddy bear. And I love it. Ripping out. I was like, this rules, this movie rules. Yes. This is where you know this movie rules. When they're going to like try to break into the house and Rosemary says, that's breaking it entering and dad's response is who's going to arrest us, Count Dracula? Maybe the police. Can I tell you a very sad note I have written here? Yes. Don't recall writing this. I wrote, I wish I could imagine. I feel like I was like ghostwriting. What's it called? Like, automatic writing? I'm sorry to laugh at that. What's it called? Automatic writing? I'm sorry, 11 laugh at that. No, I deserve it.

It's so... Was that something someone said in the movie, maybe? No, no, because I remember them being like, wow, you have this crazy imagination and I thought, wonder what it's like to imagine. To not just be so grounded in all practicality? Whatever, it's fine, I'm good. No, my brain is very healthy. Oh, that's... Oh, man. So the scene of them leaving the car, walking to the house, getting

to the house, like, trying to get into the house is like 13 minutes long. Of this like, hour and 17 minute. Oh yeah, did we mention that this movie is 77 minutes? A tight, delicious 77 minutes. Them getting to the house is like 13% of the movie. Yeah, God bless them. Ten minutes, 13%. That was the math I did. Did that come right after the I wish I could imagine?

Because that's beautiful. I feel like this is perfect because that's beautiful. I'm this is perfect. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It, this. It, this. It, this. It, this. It, this. It, this. That. That, this. That, this. That, this. That, this. That, this. That, this. That, this, this, this, this is like, this is like, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is this is this is this is this is like, this is this is like, th. It is like, th. It is like, th. It is like, th. It's thi. It's thi. It's that's thi. It's thi. I thi. I thi. It hit the calculator app on my cell phone. I feel like this is perfect because all I do is daydreams. So like, yeah. And I'm the least practical human being, you know. I get mad at myself if I approach my front door and have my keys in the wrong hand because it was inefficient for me to have to switch hands to unlock the door. Oh man, I love you. I love you too. So they get in the house, Rosemary's bitching about her coat. Yeah. I have a coat that can't get rained on. Go to hell. And Judy sees a little monster in the corner, gets scared and knocks her father down. Into a pile of empty boxes, which everyone has in their living room? Are they in the living room?

Or are they in the basement? They're in the basement, yeah. Which I can attest that everyone does have a pile of empty boxes in their basement. And the dad's like, oh, what'd you do? You see a goblin? A ghost. And then an old man when the gun shows up. Yeah, I wrote, ha ha ha ha, ha, this guy, so I guess he looked funny. I watched this yesterday. He's wearing so much foundation. It's hilarious.

Yeah. It's Mr. Hartwick. And his wife, Hillary, who has been in two of my favorite movies that we've covered in the show. Don't look now. She is the blind sister psychic. And, and, and, and, and, and, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, the the the the the the the the the the the we've covered in the show. Don't Look Now. She is the blind sister psychic. Yes. And the devil insider slash, I don't want to be born,

slash, put me back in there or whatever. Really? Yeah, she was the nanny that gets like shoved in the sewer drain by. Okay, guys, I'm gonna spoil this movie. So if you haven't seen it, like just skip, just to to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to to be to be to be the to be the to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the the the the to be to be the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I don't thiol. I don't thiol. I don't. I don't.efooomeoomboomorrow. Iboomorrow. Iboomorrow. I don't. I don't want. I guy in the movie is a very strong baby. I love that movie so much. I love it much you love that movie. I just, Joan Collins is a disaster treasure. She's not the only famous person in this movie. Who's the other? The other is... Marjo Bordner. Isabel, played by Buntie Bailey, who is the love interest in the aha video.

Oh, wow, how about that? She's in take on me. She's in another aha video as well. But yeah. Great video. Yeah, yeah. Is she British? Yeah. I felt like they were faking their access. Yeah, it does feel that way doesn't it. Also, they're their their they were their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. thea. the. the. tha. their. their. their. their.a. their.a. their accents. Yes, it does feel that way, doesn't it? Also, they're driving on the right side of the road, but everyone's an American except for the punks. The punks. And I guess the elderly couple are British as well. They're like, I don't know if they're just British or rich people from New England? Exactly, Waspi, that's what I'm trying to say. So they ask Gabriel, the older man, yeah, he says something about his work and Rosemary is like, what kind of work is that? Witchcraft and then they all, hah-haw-all about it, and he goes close, doll making. And I was like, wait.

Those things are not close. But aren't they? But they are, because they are. You're right. When dad and rosemary get their own room, and he's like, all right, here's my plan. We're going to ship the kid back to Boston, fuck the divorce settlement, then we'll go to Monte Carlo. And it's just like, you know one place that rich people go to. Yeah, Charles Band, who did not write this film, but I'm going to assume he did anyway for

the purposes of this episode, was like, put in Monte Carlo. Yeah, I know it is rich people there, putting to Monty Carlo. Wow, that's a great word to say with a Pittsburgh accent. Monty Carlo. Moni Carlo. You have to really swallow the R. Money Carlo College. Mostly girls. Uh, not Carlisle. Carlisle.

Carlisle. Carlisle. Isn't that an area near Pittsburgh? Hey, no, that's on your Harrisburg. Oh God. Anyway, here are the aforementioned movie punks with Ralph. Ralph. Also an American. I love Ralph. He's a real Richard Mazur type. He's a real Richard Mazur type. And the doll the doll has given Judy a punch doll, a punch in Judy. And Ralph is like, hey, a punch doll. And I was like, you're American.

And you don't have Britbox. So how do you know what that is? Oh, I love those when I was a kid. Really? I mean, not a kid anymore when Ralph was like freaking out about toys. It's like I love toys. No I'm a guy who's going to have to have to have to have to have to have to have sex to have sex sex to have to have sex sex to have to have to have sex sex sex sex to have to have to have sex sex to have sex sex to have to have sex to have sex to have sex to have sex to have sex to have sex to have sex to have sex to this to steal his wallet. It's like the worst plot. I love them so much.

Isabel and Enid. They have the most like old lady names. It's great. They go into their room and they start playing a tape. And it's like the Charles Bandiest punk song I've ever heard. It's straight out of terror vision. The only one we did for a live show. Also, I just remembered a nightmare I had last night. We did another live show and it was

packed out, like packed to the gills. And we were just like fumbling around and couldn't get it started. And by the time we got started, there were like eight people left. And I woke up like and that's why we can never do another live show. Yeah, yeah, too much fumbling. Yeah, I bet we can make fumblin funny. I just remembered that. That's hilarious. That's terrible. Yeah, it's the most like generic punk.

I love it so much. But it also has that like beep-boop tone that Charles Band loves so much. She puts the boombox on the mantle by knocking all the dolls off the mantle. Movie bunks are monsters, or at least Isabelle is. Yeah. Ain't it seems fine. Isabel is just like stealing antiques without remorse. And it's like they're my grandparents. No, they're not. Antiques. Ant Antiques. Antiques, too.

She's the Antiquies. I do love that doll that she finds that's like moving its bloodshot eyes. I love that the eyes are bloodshot. I think that's so creepy. And they all have like real pointy vampire teeth too. Yeah, she does that like weird smile. Oh, it's so good. And then I wrote, I think this is at th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like that's like thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.'s so good. And then I wrote, I think this is at its core the same movie as Taurus Trap. Sure. Yeah, it is. Tor Torraps a lot spookier than this movie though. Is it? Oh yeah. Okay, I don't remember.

I remember loving it. Yeah, yeah. But I just, it's so fucking ridiculous. ridiculous this movie is. Cut to Isabelle's sneaking around the house trying to steal stuff. Yeah. And she finds like silver hairbrushes, which I'm like, there's no way this punk lady is like, oh I can move these. Yeah, she's picking them up and appraising them. Like she's like not this one, not this one. And it's like what do you know about these? She thought they were anti-cused 10 minutes ago. Yeah. And the music box keeps opening that's got like death dancing with a woman inside of it. And I was like, oh, that's a dope music box. It is a dope music box.

And then the dolls come to life, attack her and start slamming her head face first into the wall. We see her being dragged. And I was just like, I cannot wait to see what is dragging her. And it's just shoving her face into the baseboard as something holds her arms out to the side, just mashing her face. Knocs her fucking teeth out. And she has a nip slip.

Oh does she? I didn't notice. I did. Damn it. It's free on Amazon Prime. Just rewind it. And then she sneaks out into the hallway, thi. the the th and th and the th and th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. thi. thi. to. too. too. tooom. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, too. And, too. And, too. And, too. And, too. And, the the the the the the the the the the the the. the the the the the the the te. tooome. the tooome. the tooome. And, too, too, too, the hallway getting away from them and Judy has gotten up with Punch to get a drink at this point. Yes.

I'm thirsty and Punch says, I'm thirst too. Yeah, adorably. And she sees a smashed up Isabel and was like, huh? Yeah, like Judy, isn't this a little weird for you? Nah. Yeah. Oh man. And then she goes to her parents? Yeah. And their dicks about it?

Well, her dad goes to hit her. And Rosemary stops him because he doesn't want to have to pay more child support? Because hitting your children means you have to pay more child support? Yeah, when you hit them, they ding and then a little number flies up above their head like like Mario. Yeah, like a little cash register sound. Yeah, okay. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. But then she goes to Ralph and Ralph's going to help her.

His hair is voluminous. And her bangs are half her head and I love both things. Oh, man, because Ralph sees the blood on her slippers and I was like, oh, you weren't bullshitting me. Yeah, yeah. Man, I really need a creepy old man's. Need a creepy old man? Manz. Man's. I'd be creeping around in a robe carrying a candelabra for no reason because I would definitely have electricity.

Just to go pee. Yeah, flicking a lighter in my room. So Ralph and Judy go a wander in looking at a trail of blood, which takes into the attic. And somehow they don't notice that Isabel is in the attic with doll's eyes replacing her eyes. You're right, they don't. They don't. But it's creepy. It is, oh my gosh, she is so creepy when Enid finds her. Yeah, I think she's great.

The dolls like sort of shove Ralph down the stairs. Or they trip him anyway. Yeah, he thinks he got bit by a rat. He thinks he gets bit by a rat. Meanwhile, Judy's dad is trying to set the punch doll on fire? Well, first he calls Ralph a pervert and says he's trying to bless to bless,then probably killed the other women or killed killed Isabel. Yeah, he's trying to burn punch. Yeah and then it just scuttles away into the darkness just like in Puppet Master. Yeah. Very Puppet Master. Very Puppet Master. And apparently the actor who played Gabriel, Guy Rolf, is in Puppet Master 3-4 and 5 playing the Puppet Master. Which we'll get to eventually. Yeah, eventually. Yeah, we've done the first two, right?

Yeah. Did we do the back-to-back? I think so, yeah, yeah, because yeah, I think we went slightly insane doing that. Yeah, I don't know why we did that, it just happened. It's like we're gonna do it with a love member, we're gonna announce later, two them all back to back. No, I didn't agree to that. You're really dragging this out, huh? Letting them know what it is. You're so excited and also just it's gonna be such a letdown for everyone. All parties.

Every single one of us. Oh, man. One of the dolls says, you know, Ralph, deep down inside, you know. And it's like, fuck! What does Ralph know? Who knows? He's just a little kid at heart, I guess.

Oh, man. There's all those angry dolls that come out from under the blanket to kill Rosemary with tiny knives? It's. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. Oh. Oh. It's. It's. It's. Oh. Oh, it's. It's. Oh, it's, it's, it's, it's, oh, oh, it's, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, it's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to's all those angry dolls that come out from under the blanket to kill Rosemary with tiny knives. It's so wonderful. And they're all a stop-motion animation. Yes. And it's so fun. And they're all like newsies with knives. Yes, they're making the angriest faces.

Yeah. And it's so funny because when we find out later what they are, it's like, why are they doing this? This is redonculus. When we find out, I have some questions about what they are. Let's get there. Okay. Someone jumps out a window to avoid the dolls. Oh, that would be Rosemary.

Yeah, she jumps out like she is jumping over the defensive line to make a fucking touchdown. Wow, that was two big sports talks for you. Oh, thanks. I was just thinking of Refrigerator Perry. Good for you. But it's just like, it's absurd. Why did she jump out the window? I don't know.

That kills her, yes. Yeah, but then they bring her back inside and put her in the bed oh that's right they must have really dragged her because dad comes back I only refer to him as daddy in my nose why? Because that's what Judy calls him and he's like he gets into bed with her and smells her and goes I'm gonna take a shower yeah was it why was that well I assume when she died she shed herself herself oh and but it's like you you you th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th like th like th th like th like th like th like th like th th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi the they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're thi thi thi thi thi thi thi te took took took took took took took took took took took the the the thi thi thi thi thi shower. Yeah, was it, why was that? Well, I assume when she died, she shed herself. Oh. And but it's like, you taking a shower isn't gonna cure this situation, sir.

No, no. I did like how she has a sheet pulled over. Did he think maybe he should himself? Is Daddy Incontinent? It's been a long night. But he comes back out in this like motley colored pajama set. Yeah, which is later described as modern apparel. You know those modern silk chamois. Yeah. So we see Enid going around looking for Isabel. Yeah. And she sees the older, the old lady that lives there. Pushing a doll around in a carriage? Yeah. Why? Just to be creepy? Yeah, just to be weird. Just to set the tone? A little atmosphere. I just the other day found out why they're called prams in England. I don't know why they're called prams. They're perambulators. Oh. Oh. It's the full name for them. Yeah. I'm gonna go prammulat-pam. Pr. Pram. Yeah. They. They. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. They're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. They're. They're. been abbreviated to Pram. Love that.

Yeah, I'm gonna go perambulate. Yeah, strollers. We were like, hey, make it a stroller. We can stroll. We don't need a perambula. Parabula. Whatever. But, and there's just like a little doll in, like, in the bram, and it's so funny. She's just quietly walking down a the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, to be th, th. to be th, to be th, to be th, to be th, thrown, thrall, thoom, tho, thoom, thoom, tholers, tholers, tholers, th, th, tholers, th. We th. We's, th. We's, th. We's, th. We's th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrall, throoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooolololololooloolooloolo, th. Yeah's just quietly walking down a dark hallway. And her hair is wild. And her hair is wild. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, I think just to be

weird and creepy. Yep. Okay. So she finds Isabel in the attic and she has a doll's face with doll eyes that fall out of her stupid doll skull and I just love, I wrote, oh my god I love it. She's holding them. I love it. She's holding them. I love that less. Because she holds the eyes up to the side of her head. She's still looking out of them. And I was like, I don't like that anymore. I like to. But because we see their eyes are just black pits. Yeah. Yeah. Oh man. She starts setting them on fire. There's a doll writhing on fire, which is all chattering, which is just so good and weird and stupid, which is I guess basically, the basically the descriptors of every Charles Band movie ever. Not Ginger Dead Man. No, it was not good.

See, I would think that you would, did you like Ginger Dead Man better than Terrorvision? No. Okay, okay. Ginger Dead Man was unwatchable. Yeah. Terrorism just didn't strike my fancy. Sure, yeah. Is this when when when when when when when when when when when when the doll when the doll when the doll when the doll when the doll when the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the doll the the th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. Yeah. Is this when the dolls start sawing her? Oh no, that's Rosemary, though, they're trying to saw her legs and hands off. Yeah, this is

when the little band of marching soldiers does the firing squad. Oh, that's right. It's so cool. They fucking shot her twice, which I loved. She has so many squib right on her skin too. I fucking love it so much. Yeah. The firing squad is so funny. It's so delightful. It really is. There's like a cowboy doll that lassos are so that's like, y'ah. Yeah. Yeah.

But she starts breaking the dolls. Yes. And we see that there's like little monsters inside the dolls. It's like goblins or something. Or something, and some of them just have full-blown skulls inside of them that are making ah, ah, gna, guses. That's true, too. That is true, too. And this movie is moving at a clip, because it's got a lot of ground to cover and not, and not, and not, and to to to to to to to to to the their, and their, and their, and their, and their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thoomomomomomombs, tho, their, thoomomomomomomomomomomomomomomomom. And, and thoom, and some, and some, and some, and some, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi.... And, and thi. And, and thi. And, and thi. And, and thoombs. And, and thoomorrow, and thoomorrow, and thoomorrow, and thooomorrow, and some thoooomorrow, and some thooomorrow, and some do it. No downtime in this movie. We cut back to Rosemary, she's back in the bed and the blood is starting to seep through the sheet that she's under, which I like a lot.

Yeah. And dad's like, all right, I'll still do this. Yeah, dad's down to fuck. And then he pulls the sheet, when he pulls, when she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, the sheet, she, the sheet, she, she, she, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, the sheet, she's th. She, she's, th. She's the, s. She's the, s. She's thee, s. She's, s. She's th just dragging her? It's so funny. But the dolls are he like hears something and the dolls whisper just the wind, which I thought was very good. And he's like he's got to kill Ralph now because he's convinced that Ralph killed Roseberry. Yes, yes. And so he chases them down into the basement, where Ralph and Judy are like finding out that the dolls are animate and they're not going to kill Ralph because Judy defends Ralph.

That little terrifying little doll conference that they're having when they're trying to decide what to do with them where they're like looking over their shoulders is so fucking good. And the fact that Judy knows what they're doing? She knows what they're doing? She knows what they're saying. She's like, oh they're trying to decide whether or not they should kill you. Yeah. And then she's like, oh they're gonna let us go, we can go. Because you're a kid at heart. Yeah. And I was like, oh so every manchild in America just heaved a sigh of relief. Yeah, into their Marvel movies. I don't know. There's just something so joyful about like the the wrench menacingly. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, it's like everything you wanted Pennywise to be. An hour and 17 minutes long. That's right. And a clown holding a wrench. Making a mad face.

This is where I have the note, I'm going tell my kids this is Toy Story. You're not. Please don't tell my kid that. So Ted's trying to kill Ralph. Ralph goes to hit him with a doll and the doll starts to cry and Ralph cradles it instead of hitting him with the witch. I just thought it was so funny. Ralph rules. Yeah. I love Ralph. Like in early in the movie in my notes I was like, oh maybe Ralph can be her new dad. Yeah, yeah. And then the movie ends with Ralph becoming her new dad. Apparently Stuart Gordon wrote a second movie to this where Ralph met her mom, they fell alone, got married he's thethe new dad, and someone males, Judy dolls of Hillary and Gabriel. Oh, I'd watch that. Yeah, yeah. And then like mayhem ensued,

yeah, but it never got made. Bummer. How many shitty things have gotten made and this did Dolls too didn't get made? How many puppet master movies are there? Oh, a Brazilian. But they all turned into Nazisthere? Oh, a Brazilian. But they all turn into Nazis later. Anyway, oh yeah. There's some weird stuff in those, huh? For sure. Well, so dad tries attacking Ralph, and then Gabriel and Hillary come in,

and they're like, yeah, no, we're witches. We told you that earlier. This is, uh, after Punch pulls a sword out of his little flag that he's been holding. And then eventually ends up with a drill? And David just unplugs it and he yanks him over and punch goes, whoa! Which is funny because it acknowledges that like, yeah, they're just dolls. Like you can just pick him up and throw them. This is after he's thrown his sword into David's shoulder. Yes. And when David kills him, he just screams,

fuck you, clowny! And crushes his head. And for some reason, there's nobody inside of this doll? I think, because they weren't gonna give, they liked Judy. They weren't gonna give her a evil dog. Yeah, but somehow it came to her her their their their their tha tha tha tha tha, tha, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thus, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thus, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. th. th. th. th. thu, thu, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thii. that's, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tha. tha. somehow it came to her defense, so actually I don't get that. Yeah, because it talks at one point, you're just like, what is going on? Yeah. So yes, they come down. They come down. Keep him a talk about parenting. And then through top five best transformation scenes in a movie turn dad into punch. It's up there with American were wolf in London. Oh for sure. When he, at one point is just a the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tol to tol tol tol to tol to to to to to to to to to to to to to tol, tol, tol, tol tol tol. It tol. It tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tooo. to. tole. to. to. to. to. to. to. t Weirwolf in London. Oh for sure. When he at one point is just a man with big floppy hands and a giant head and I was like this rules this is so good.

So hard. Charles Bands sure can't imagine so can Stewart Gordon. So cut to. Her dad is a doll but like I fail to see how that helps anyone actually. Somehow they got access to all his money, which is hilarious. Yeah, like, this is going to be a problem when the mother tries to prove that he still owes her child support because he, like, the story that Gabriel and Hillary tell is that he ran off. The next morning, Gabriel wakes Ralph up who've been sleeping in their coats. On the couch. And he's like, oh, your dad left a note. Let me read the note to you. You'd be better off living with their mom. You'd be much happier there.

We're moving to another country and changing our names. Like she's gonna go after him for child support. And then Ralph says, where are the two hitchhigers? Oh, PS, we're taking the h the h the hitchh the hitchhik the hitch the two hitchhikers? Oh yes we're taking the hitchhikers with us. And then pulls the paper away so he can't grab it. Oh it's so fucking fire. Oh yes I am taking the two hitchhikers with me. Yes. So fucking funny. And Ralph Ralph puts on his Cubs hat and walks on out of there. Why are you in the UK the UK the UK the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thiolk. thia' thiolk. thia' thia' thia' thia' thia' th. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yesubs hat and he walks on out of there. Why are you in the UK? I don't know. I was like, and why does he drive that old motor car? There's a lot, a lot of questions. Oh, my God. So basically, they were like your dad left you all of his money and enough enough money for a plane ticket and they got Ralph a plane ticket to Boston too. He's going to take you back to back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back back. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. tttthe. tthe. their. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. their. their. their plane ticket and they got Ralph a plane ticket to Boston too, he's going to take you back to Boston. And so she's just going to show up and be like,

Mom, this is my new dad, Ralph. It's your new husband, Ralph. I can't believe that was actually the sequel. Actually, I can. And as she's leaving, she says that her dad had called her. Yeah. So, okay, tell me what they, why are these, what are these dolls? So the, the, what do they call, the, hardwicks, used magic to turn people they didn't like into tiny doll people? To keep them around their home forever and let them have ambulatory function? Yeah, but like they're under their sway. Are they?

What if the dolls turn on them? I would hate that. They were, they were conducting this. Don't you feel, don't you worry about the risk of turning criminals into dolls and giving them tiny weapons? Yeah, but you know if you're a child at heart, I think everything's fine. See. The moral of this story. Is never grow up. No, never grow up. Never get old.

Yeah. Never die. Was Enid not a child at heart? I guess not. No, she had to be shot multiple times. Play a tiny firing squad. Holy shit. Kady!

Alan. Rate this movie. I loved every second of it. And it is not very many seconds and those are my two favorite things. Loving something and having it end quickly. What's wrong with me? I'm giving this movie a nine.

It's fantastic. I loved every, literally every second is fun, except for the first 10 minutes, which is 13% of the movie of them walking to the house. I think this has to be the the th be th be th be th be the the the the the the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the theateateateateateate. I the. theateateatheatheatheatheatheatheateateatheatheat. I'm the. I'm that. I'm that. I thatting, I thatting, I the. I the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the theate. theateateateateate, theateateateate. theateateateate. the. the, thethe first 10 minutes, which is 13% of the movie of them walking to the house. I think this has to be the most high-rated Charles Band movie for you. Didn't I love Pop and Master? And I love Goulders. And I loved Tourist Trap. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe you're a big Charles Bandhead. I think I am. I think I am. I think Terror Vision threw me. Yeah. Yeah. But it's like fine. It's just not for me. Yeah. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say I fucking love TerraVision. I know you do. What do you think about this movie? I adored it. It was such a good palette cleanser after Halloween kills. Definitely. Also nice that we did two movies for this week that were under three hours total. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I would give this movie an eight. Nice. Yeah, it's a delight.

Oh, so much about. You can not. You could. This is a good way to spend an hour and 17 minutes. There are so many shitty ways to spend an hour and 17 minutes. You can lose that scrolling through Reddit. you know what I mean? Don't do that. Watch dolls 1987 instead. I don't know why I always put 1987 on the end like that's the title. It's not. Tall's 1987. Yeah it's like Blade Runner 2021 or whatever. Katie. Alan. Can I shout out a Patron? Please. This is from Scott from Lowlville. Hi Scott from Lowl-Woll. He didn't give us his last name because he would said we'll probably say it that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's they. they. I I they. I'll they. I'll they. I'll they. I'll they. I'll they. I'll they. I'll they. I'll they. Hi, Scott from Lulwol. He didn't give us his last name because he would said we will probably say it incorrectly. How dare you? I say everything correctly.

My message, Katie shits on everything I love, five star, go Stillers, go Bucco's, go State. I'm a pit-alum, so no, but okay. I don't, I'm not, when I shit on things that you love, I'm not shitting on you, and I'm glad you appreciate that. Yeah, for sure. Keep up the good work. I've already started watching films I haven't seen so I can listen to those episodes. Oh, that's awesome. Thank you, Scott. And thanks to everyone who's a patron. Yeah, and if you want to Patreon.com back slash Waroff Ambulance. And you can watch our action movies. Or listen to them. Wait, yeah, we don't make action movies.

You can watch, yeah, no, we're going to start making action movies. Should we? We stopped making YouTube. We could just set up the camera. What are we going to punch each other? I'm going to make a tiny firing squad. claymation. I have enough dolls around up here. I have a lot of polymer clay. Oh great let's do this. Let's make it happen. Our first movie Take Bigelow is going to be great. Yes I think that's probably a copywritten.

Katie. Speaking of movies in Pittsburgh, I need to throw a shout out here for a movie we we probably won't do or at least not until our 500s but innocent blood is a fucking fantastic movie if you're from Bitsburg. We've that has been requested multiple times. Yeah, oh I just watched it with a group of friends and it is so, it's the second time I've watched it also with a group of friends. It is so fucking fun. I need to see this movie. this in the 500s. It is so fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun. It is so fu fu fu fu fu fu fu. It is so fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu. It is so fu fu fu fu fu fu fu. It is so fu fu fu. It is so fu. It is so fu. It is so fu. It is so fu. It is so fun. It is th. It is th. It is th. It is th. It is th. It is so fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. to see this movie. So, so episode 500, Market Town is Innocent Blood. I said in the 500s, but I'll take 500. Okay. Okay. No, we've got to do something big for 500. It can't be Innocent Blood. An extremely niche film, in which point, which is actually you can see the corner of my block. They come and they walk around my corner. Oh, nice. And then at one point Anthony Lepaglia says he's not in Bloomfield. And Tom Sabini's in it! Of course the Amy's in it! And Dario Argento is in

it. Wow! Yeah. That's well as all the hits. Dario Argento is an EMT just patting a man's head for no reason. It sounds like something Dario Argento would do. Yeah, okay. Sorry I'm done with innocent blood now. Well we're gonna get to to to to to to get into into into into into into into into into into into into into into into into into into this this this this this th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm t. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. t. te. te. to. tom. tom. tom. t. t. I. I. I'm. I'm. I innocent blood now. Well, we're gonna get into this right now. Oh, well, this will be a conversation. Yeah. So I've put in a special request for a movie for us to do next week. This is what Allen's, this was like one of the first things he said to me upon sitting in our chairs this evening. Actually, I think it was the first thing. I said, trying to figure out if I was missing a joke or if Twilight was something else. The answer to both questions is no. No, no, it's not and you're not. We're gonna do Twilight.

We're gonna do Twilight. It's a horror movie? It's vampires and were wolves and shit. Fair. I've only ever seen the RiftTracks version. Oh really? Maybe you should just watch that again. We'll just steal some jokes. I'm so high, I remember none of it.

Oh man. So we're gonna do Twilight. And with that, I'm punishing Alan the following week, so. Buckle up, babies. It's gonna be a rough road for a couple weeks here. Also, do you like how Alan insinuated that I agreed to do the series earlier in this episode? Because he was like, oh, and we're going to do that again with the, like we did with public, no, sir, unless I love it, in which case I'm going to read all the books? I just know that at some point a baby gets bit out of someone and I really.... that. In the first movie? Or a later movie? Well, why don't we just do that one then?

Because we've got to start at the beginning. Why? We've never done that before. We can't just jump in in the middle of the series. My theory is that I'm going to watch this movie and love it. thi thii tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho. thooo. thooooooo. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thoooooo- tho- tho- tho-s. tho. thi. tho-a. tho-a. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to to to to thi. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Why. Why t going to watch this movie and love it. And that's just a slippery slope to 50 Shades of Grey, right? Does the baby get bitten out of a tum or? Or out of the vagina? Yeah, yeah, it gets bitten out of a Kristen stew.

She's gonna be okay? Yeah, I think she becomes a vampire because of it. Why couldn't they get that baby out any other way? Uh, from that I was explained to me, just go ahead and skip ahead if you don't want to hear this. Well, get ready for Twilight Talk, because it's apparently the next six episodes. How many Twilight movies are there? I think five. Oh, no. There's four books and I think they're Harry Potter that shit.

You really know a lot about Twilight. Turns out Missy has read all of the books. Missy. She's got a dirty reading history that I think... I don't think she wants them to know about this. She's read all the Twilight books, that's all you need to know. So apparently, Case 2 gets impregnated by our pets. And the baby grows super fast inside of her because vampires and humans aren't supposed to have babies. Like in Joan Collins movies, I don't want to be born slash the devil within her, slash the devil inside her.

It's growing so fast that she's not going to be able to birth it. It's just going to rip out of her, so he has to bite her tum to liberate the baby. I have a question. Sure. Sure. the thoomk. tha question question question. thaaqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq. th. th. thi. thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi. the the thi. the the. the the. the, the. thi. theat, to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. theateateateateateateateate. theatea. thea. thea. thea. to thea. thea. thea. I th ask me, I am now a twilight expert. The vampires in the Twilight Universe are a regular-sized people. You got it. So why are the baby so big? Well, the baby should, I mean, so babies are usually small when they're, I don't know if you're familiar with babies.

No, please, ma'am explain babies to you. Please, I'm ready. I think the problem is that like the baby was going to be multiple feet tall. Vampires are born full-grown. I, I, I, well it's never happened before. This is the first time. It's not supposed to happen. Wait, she's birthing a vampire? She gets, she gets impregnated on their honeymoon. From what I understand. They get married, but she's not a vaffiired but thired but thired but she's thired but thired but thired but thired. thired. thired. thired. thired. thieded thied, thied, thied, thied, thied, thiom. I's thiouined, thiouined, thioued, thiouined, thiouined, thioued, thioued, thiom- I'm thioued, thioued, thioued, th th th thiated, thiated, thiated, thiated, thioued, thioued, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. to thii. to to thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi. to do the whole series. I have intrigued you enough with knowing almost no facts. I'm not intrigued. I'm baffled. I just love it also because apparently the whole thing is like an allegory for why sex is bad. Oh really? Wow, this is what happens in year eight I guess. Welcome to it. Season 8 off the rails. Which is why 50 Shades of Grace started off as Twilight Fanffic. What? What? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? th? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? th? th? th? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not? I'm not. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I. I? I? I? I? I? I. I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I. I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I'm, I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. to it. Season 8, off the rails. Which is why 50 Shades of Grey started off as Twilight Fanfick. What? Yeah.

I didn't know that. Yeah. Ew. And then it morphed into the weird, whatever 50 Shades of Gray is. Horny Housewives or whatever it is. I don't even want to tou that with a 10-foot pole. It seems so gross. It just seems th-it-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-yorouiiioli-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. just seems no. Yeah. Yeah. So come back for Twilight. So come back for Twilight. Or don't. As I said last week. No, come back for Twilight because I'm sure it'll be fun for you guys. Yeah. I'm sure it's going to be fun for us too.

Is it a long movie? I don't know. Ah. Dr. Google over here, referring to myself. My, can you wait? No. No. I don't. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm th, I'm th. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, th. Yeah, I th. Yeah, I th. Yeah, I th. Yeah, I th. Yeah, I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. Is it a long movie? I don't know. Dr. Google over here, referring to myself, my can you wait? No, I don't want the whole saga. Just forget it. Bella Swan? Her name is Bella Swan. Did a child write this? Is Stephanie Meyer a child? Okay, Google. How long is the first Twilight movie? One-twenty-one minutes. Ah, okay, I'm in. All right, so go back next week for Twilight. Or don't, it's up to you. Or do.

We're gonna have a good time with it, though. It'll be fun. You get to hang out with your old friends, Alan and Katie. Yeah, that's what you're here for. Certainly not the content. And go buy t-shirts, tea public. Patreon, we already talked about it. Yeah, uh... Twitter, Instagram, Facebook. Have we said that in years? I don't know.

Leave us a review. Yeah, could you? Because we're falling in the rankings because everybody else gets reviews. And... because everybody else gets reviews. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Uh, and... Maybe we should start offering incentives for reviews. Well, we give them. I'll mail them a Kit Kat. One single Solitary Kit Kat Kat.

Who wouldn't go online and leave a review for one single Solitary Kit Kat in an envelope? I'll do it. Don't test me. An unprotected springing for bubble. No, you know what I'm actually gonna do? Is put it in a side of sandwich bag full of cotton balls and then put in an envelope and mail it to your front door. If you're lucky, I'll throw in a Reese's piece as well. Oh no, I'm gonna eat those.

Yeah, you can have whatever pieces of candy my kid-treating. So there you go. She's gonna eat the kit, thki, thki, thki, thki, thki, thki, thki, thki, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. tho, th. th. tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. And there you go. She's gonna eat the kid cats. I'm sorry. Write a review, somehow let us know that you've done that with your address. Katie will send you a maybe a chewed candy bar. No, I'm not gonna know, listen, she knows what she likes and what she doesn't. You're gonna get a little bit of honey. Sure. You're gonna get, I don't to get, we'll to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho, we, we'll tho, we'll tho, we'll tho, we'll tho, we'll tho, we'll to to to the, we'll the, we'll the, I the, the, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the, the, the, th the, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the, the, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that of pretzels. I have stamps. tho-com at work. I can do that. And this episode is brought to you by stamps. dot com. Because who has time to go to the post office? Thanks for listening to another episode of Wear-Wilf Ambulance.

Bye-bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Who? At the pool. Now we do it, Finland's to fulfill reviews. Get the clouds and let the face. He in the air space. Appeals are tasked in case. Please make I continue to crave. E&T. A-Rodd.

All road and comedy reviews. Hary, Brian, from Wayne's and Stephen Gang. E-T. We live deliciously. Henry Bryan from Wayne's and Stephen King. END. We live deliciously at tempo trees of bees crazily gone to the day. A paranormal act of duties from the Strue Roger's city. EFT. E.M.D.