Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 495- Split (2016)

Episode Date: October 14, 2024

Hi EMTs, this week we recorded and did not lose our "Split" episode. Were the jokes as good the second time around? I guess we'll never know. Special topics for your consideration include: beautiful teenage outcasts, being mad at M. Night's bad takes, absolutely stripping a therapist of their license like yesterday, films that make you believe that someday you will have to crawl through an HVAC vent, and an extremely important bit of information about new patron saint of the podcast Frank Langella. Anya Taylor-Joy really is everywhere, isn't she? Catch her in Episode 73- "The Witch," Episode 319- "New Mutants" (which is also a crossover with the 'Marveling at Marvel's Marvels podcast), and Episode 415- "The Menu." The regular lineup of links! You can support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and listen to a ton of action movie episodes. Join now and you can help choose our next film!   leave us a message at 412-407-7025 hang out with some cool listeners at https://discord.gg/DutFjx3cBD  buy merch at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance the best place to reach us is at [e-mail] we're on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance sorta on Twitter @werebulance sorta on Instagram @werewolfambulance www.werewolfambulance.com if you feel you really must lodge a complaint with us, please do it on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance because we are probably not gonna see that, ever.   If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously, we have the best listeners, hands down.

CINEMATIC MUSIC MUSIC Katie. Alan. In a Shyamalan twist, at the recording of our last episode of Split. The computer shitted the bed. It shitted the bed. And to be fair, that's your fault. Now, the rest of this episode not being on time is my fault because I was so fucking hungover

after we went to the prom last weekend that I couldn't get out of bed to record on Sunday. You people, you're dirty little birds. They're, oh, that's the daddy-daughter dance thing? That was offensive, I was offended. I do like that. People are sick. There was a discussion from a couple people that were like, so I think I'm discovering I'm bisexual right now.

Wow, that's great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, welcome to it, to your new life. Forget it. Alan refused to touch my hips in the Welcome to it, to your new life. Forget it. Alan refused to touch my hips in the photo because it was too weird. I touched your hip. You touched it and then you pulled your hand away

like it was on fire. It's a daddy daughter dance. I don't want to get too weird. What a great platonic friendship we have. I feel like we are like, I don't know if we're the exception that proves the role of the thing. Like, do you have a guy's good friends with a girl that you're just thinking about fucking her

all the time? No, definitely not. I'm like, I just want to help my friend. Yeah. Alan bought me a headlight because mine's been out for a couple of weeks and I just, you know, I'm going to get to it. Thanks, Alan. I figure I could help. Thank you. So it's the least I can do, Katie.

Speaking of helping and the least we can do. Yes. Katie, we have a message from a listener. This is from Amanda Kay. Hi, Amanda Kay. Amanda Kay says, I'm a huge fan of y'all. I live in Asheville, which has recently been hit by Hurricane Helene. Yeah, sure has.

We are going through it. Can you please mention us? It's not big in the news anymore and it should be. Please encourage your fans to donate to Beloved Asheville. Beloved Asheville, where can anyone find this? I believe you can search belovedashville.com. It's a charity in Asheville, North Carolina that helps people out, get food, get shelter,

get the things they need. If you guys have a few extra bucks, think about they're on their way. Yeah. This is some real shit that's going on right now. Also anything you can do to help in Florida. We probably got this email before Milton hits. Imagine your house being taken out by Milton.

That's just insulting. So fucking rude. It was like Marion not already taken. Why do we have to name them anyway? So you can be like, oh, when Milton came through, he really gave me a wedgie. I guess so. Katie.

Yeah. Can I read another? I went to Instagram recently and saw that we had a bunch of messages. So this is another one from Instagram. Oh, great. This is from Lauren M. And I think it's proper that we do this

at the top of the episode, because it'll set the tone for the rest of the episode, I hope. Okay, hi, Lauren M. I had a parishioner years ago who dated Frank Langella when they were both students at Syracuse University. Hole up. She told me that he was very sweet,

but only wanted one thing. And she was waiting for her true love, parenthetical marriage. So she dumped him. So yes, Frank Langella fucks, confirmed. This person did not fuck Frank Langella though. They were waiting for a marriage. They had the chance to fuck Frank Langella and didn't when he was a college

student. Could have fucked Dracula, young Dracula. Oh my God. Could have fucked Skeletor, young Skeletor. Could have fucked that cake fail. Oh my God. Wow. Thank you, Lauren. Also, is this, are you a religious practitioner? And also what are you doing listening to us? Cause I feel like we're pieces of shit. Just to start off, I had a parishioner. I had a parishioner. I had a parishioner.

It's like an episode of Grantchester. Thank you for writing in and thank you for the confirmation. Yes. And thanks to folks who write to us on Instagram. I check it every once in a while. It's hard. It's hard for us out here. You know, when else is hard, Katie, we get to talk about Split again. Doing this entire episode again, but to be fair I watched the movie nine days ago and remember none of it

Yeah, even though we did just watch the trailer I watched half of it and also I feel like I had recorded that at the end of like a 16 hour day and was being a real asshole So I'm just gonna be a regular asshole tonight You kept throwing rocks at me. It was very weird That was head wig You can't fucking blame it all on me. It's not all Katie. Barry, I'm going to need you to calm down.

Please would Barry be wearing the sweatshirt in public? But he would cut the shoulder out of it. I should cut the shoulder out of this. So this is a movie by one very sensitive M. Night Shyamalan. His sensitive and compassionate look at both childhood abuse and trauma and mental illness. Oh my God. Did you just remember that?

Yeah. Oh no. Oh God, no. Yeah. M. Night. M. Night. M. Night. Like, yeah.

Milton Knight. Milton Knight. Shyamalan. Milton Night. Milton Night. Shy Mullen. What are you doing? All right. My first note says, I can't remember why I hate this movie, but I know that I hate this movie so I definitely went into it with a great attitude. My first note says Blue Mouse.

Blue Mouse. Blue Mouse. You know, I decided to watch some like shitty true crime on Netflix this week to let my brain rest. Oh yeah, sure. Why not? it's all made by Blumhouse now Yeah, they're making like Netflix true crime documentaries. Why not? I mean you've got Brazilians of dollars and they make buku bucks because everybody's at home not wanting to get murdered. Yeah It's not that I don't want to get murdered

Katie speaking of murder. Yeah, can I punch up punch? I punch up. What's punch? I was on some I think read it and I saw a thing from my favorite murder Katie, speaking of murder, can I punch up? Punch up. May I punch up? What's punch? I was on some, I think Reddit, and I saw a thing from my favorite murder. And it was Karen and the other one talking. That's all you need to know is it's Karen and the other one. That's the first problem.

And the other one was talking about how she has finally reached an age where she was at a cafe and shushed someone. And I went, oh, I knew I didn't like you. Yeah, the other one. Don't shush people. Don't ever shush people. Karen was like, oh, you were justified in shushing.

And I was like, mm. That's why your name's Karen. Oh my God, they're the worst. Punch up. I actually think Karen Kilgareff is very funny, but. She's fucking hilarious. Yeah. Just on that show, it just like rubs me the wrong way.

Suck my flaps. My favorite murder. What is the like rubs me the wrong way. Suck my flaps. My favorite murder. What is the woman's name? It's Georgia. Georgia Carstark. Cardstark. Yeah, something like that. Carpark.

Georgia Carpark. Cardstark. There's so many things. I'm sure she never got any of that in school. I'm sure she didn't. She's very pretty. And that's the problem with this movie is because we're meant to believe that Anya Taylor Joy

is an outcast when she's fucking Anya Taylor Joy. I feel like it's every supermodel that's like, I was just a tomboy. No, you fucking weren't. No, you fucking weren't. Here's me going to Cotillion as a tomboy. I was an early bloomer, but also a tomboy. Yeah. She's at a birthday party where everybody else I was an early bloomer, but also a tomboy.

She's at a birthday party where everybody else is having fun and she's staring out the window. And this is a great M. Night setup of people having a conversation about someone and the camera slowly pans the room and ends up on this dejected Ugo sitting in a corner. She's just hideous. I mean, hideous.

We learned that she was a Mercy invite from the birthday girl who said she couldn't invite everyone from art class except for Anya Taylor-Joy. And her dad's being real nice about it. Yeah, because she needs a lift home because no one's there for her. The other children are trying to get them to put her in an Uber, which I think is kind of fucked.

That's safe for kids, right?, which I think is kind of fucked. That's safe for kids, right? Yeah. I think they have Uber Teen now so that you can just be a fucking predator. You know how I know because I listen to podcasts and all I get advertised is Uber Teen. Every third ride is Chris Hansen. Gotcha. and gotcha. So they're going out to the car. Dad's got a lot of leftovers, which I appreciated about dad. He's like, fuck, I'm not making lunch for anyone tomorrow. This is great.

No, this is the next three nights of dinners. This trip to Bennigan's really paid off or wherever we are. Hula hands. MR Ducks. I can't think of another one. I can't think of another one, but I was drinking this and it burned my nose when I left. Chee-Chees. Chee-Chees. Rip, it wasn't even their fault.

It was the goddamn green onions. They didn't give people hepatitis. Listen guys, we don't know much about this movie anymore, so you're getting what you get. And you get what you get. And you don't throw a fat. You don't get upset. No, you don't throw a fat.

I'm from Pittsburgh. That's a party. A fat is a party. No, you don't throw a fat. Don't throw a fat. Don't throw a fat. So dad gets knocked out and James McAvoy gets in the car and sprays knockout spray in these teen girls' faces in the backseat. I definitely thought one of them was the mom.

I don't know why you thought that. Dad looks like somebody would date young. And ATJ kind of sees it going down and she's like, well, I better just accept this and see what happens next. She like, this is, yeah, go ahead, I'm sorry. Here's the thing, as a teen, I feel like I also wouldn't have said anything when I saw that dad had spilled all the food. Oh no, definitely.

Like, I wouldn't make a fuss. No, you wouldn't wanna embarrass him. Yeah. Yeah. But he like puts on a mask to spray the other two and then takes off the mask. But Anya Taylor-Joy is unaffected, so I guess that he didn't really need that mask. Uh-uh, no, not from the knockout juice. No, she reaches for the door handle,

he sprays her, that's it. What kind of outfit would you say James McAvoy is wearing? I would say he's dressed like a vegan in this scene, a straight edge vegan. I love your interpretation of a vegan, just very uptight, just very uptight. He's buttoned to the Adam's apple and his glasses are pushed very high up on his nose.

And to me that says straight edge vegan. Don't drink, don't smoke, don't fuck, at least he can fucking think, you know? His clothes are very slim fitting. Yeah. He's fucking straight edge vegan. He is ripped in this movie. Yeah. Yeah.

And he's fine in this movie. He's great even. I would go as far as to say he's fine in this movie. Oh yeah, would. I mean, what he is doing in this movie is spectacular. Sure. It's just a shame that it was written by a toddler. He's doing a thing that's spectacular and also like,

oh, this will be a good acting exercise. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, I'm going to use this for my senior project. This will go good in my reel. So yeah, they get knocked out and then they wake up in a basement of somewhere. Who could say where this basement might be?

And when you find out where it is, you just, you just want to be dead. Oh my God. There's flowers and a vase in the bathroom. Yeah. The bathroom's super nice. Cleaner than my bathroom. I would not give these girls glass. Sure. Glass is a weapon. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, as pie taught us, you just, you just glass somebody. And if you'd like to hear pie, you can listen to our wormwood episode. I feel like that movie is just getting edged out of my brain right now. I remember a tradie. I remember everybody have a name like Chaz or Tomo. The more that we do this, the more there's like,

I'm just shoving shit into my brain and my brain's like, all right, well you're, all right, age six is gone. Yeah, yeah. Totally. You know what though, for the best, I'd way rather remember warm wood than my own childhood. I can't wait to get rid of junior high. Oh yes. That was the worst. Oh my God. When everybody else got their period except for me. When my armpits just started stinking one day in school. Like out of nowhere, they were like, well that switch flipped.

Wow. You smell like a hoagie now. But we're not here to talk about hoagies. This is the kind of trauma these girls have endured and nothing worse, nothing worse has happened to them than this. This is a movie about trauma. It's about beating your children, but not beating them too much. Yeah. Beating them the appropriate amount.

Sure. You got, there's a beatometer on kids and you just want to get, you just want to kiss that line. There's like red, yellow, green. You want to keep it in the yellow. Sure. Cause if it's in the red, they're on your Taylor joy. Right. If it's in the green, there are these other two. Right. Exactly. Exactly. You got to keep it in the yellow. Because if it's in the red, they're Anya Taylor Joy. If it's in the green, they're these other two. Right, exactly, exactly. You got to keep it in the yellow. But your kid, just enough. Just enough.

Just enough. And that is from the M. Night Shyamalan School of Child Rearing. This man has no children, correct? That's not true. He's got a daughter who just directed a film. Really? I believe I suggested to you, and you went knew what. That sounds like something I would say. I'm sorry. So he chooses one

of the girls. I believe this is Marsha. Marsha, Marsha, Marsha for all you Brady Bunch fans. And stop as she's going out of the room. ATJ grabs her and says, pee on yourself. Yeah. This is the only point at which we get any sort of indication of ATJ's past where it's like not ham-fisted. Yeah. Because when she says pee on yourself, you're like, oh, fuck, that's experience. Like she knows what to do.

Yeah. And that's sad. Yeah, but also weaponize your urine. Oh, absolutely. Not even just in an assault situation. Piss into a water Yeah, but also weaponize your urine. Oh, absolutely. Not even just in an assault situation. Piss into a water balloon, throw it off your roof. I don't care. Ha ha ha.

When you get your cup from Starbucks, hand them over a cup of your urine and say, it's a trade. It's a trade. And believe me, sir, you have come out on top. Ha ha ha. That's a good pee pee. Uh. Ow. Ow. And believe me sir, you have come out on top. That's a good pee pee. I, full disclosure, the reason I couldn't record on Sunday is because I threw up so hard, I pulled a muscle in my chest. It's been four days and it still really hurts and laughing hurts it.

So I might cry. I'm so sorry. This is a mess. This episode is a mess. The last funny thing I might cry. I'm so sorry. This is a mess. This episode is a mess. The last funny thing I will say. Thank you. I will not either. Because I laugh at my own jokes. According to some reviews that we get, I didn't say anything funny yet. Fucking idiots.

So she does. She pees on herself. It works. I have a note that says she's going to get itchy. Yeah. Yeah, you she's gonna get itchy. Yeah, yeah, you're gonna get itchy. And we get a flashback. Katie, what's the flashback of? Is this, excuse me, I'm sorry. Is this a flashback to her Uncle John

who looks like Liver King and her hunting dad? Yes, they're at a restaurant and Uncle John's talking about something and dad is making fun of them and young, I don't look anything like Anya Taylor Joy is agreeing with dad. They needed a child whose eyes were further apart. I'm saying it. They needed a child.

That child did not start out with eyes that were a normal distance apart. She's like a little anime baby came to life. Yeah, she really is. And, and, but yeah. So, and they're talking about hunting. Yeah. Yeah. And she knows stuff about hunting. And I was like, all right, we're going to get a year next. We're going to get this very experienced child who has been out in the world. Maybe the no one to pee thing was cause the coyotes. I mean, if you've not seen your next, it's a great film about a woman who grew up as a survivalist who then can use her skills. But that's not what this is about. This is

about a different kind of survivalist in the least empathetic way. You know the thing where you want to crawl out of your skin? Yeah. Yeah. You feeling that right now? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I hate it. I hate it.

So we're at the therapist's house slash office. Yeah. Do you feel that right now? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hate it, I hate it. So we're at the therapist's house slash office. Yeah. If my therapist's house slash office was this nice, I'd be pissed. Cause you know he made that money on the back of my brokenness. Sometimes I think that my therapist has a pool in his backyard in the shape of my initials.

And I feel like when I showed up and I was like, well, my mom died, he just was like, I'm getting a hot tub. He's like, Oh man, I could add that fucking middle, middle name in there. Now. Yeah. The full name. Get the full name. I'm happy for you.

Dr. So-and-so. Dr. Bleep. So we get Yuki Washington on the television telling... You love Yuki Washington. He doesn't. His name is Yuki Washington. It's a great fucking name. Anyway, he tells this, you know, just talking to her over the TV,

tells her about these abductions that have happened. Right. And immediately she's like, oh, did I do that? She is like that, but not to any amount of concern in which she might inform the police about what's going on. Oh yeah, no, you don't snitch. No, you're not. Katie.

It's a patient confidentiality. Let him rape and murder those teen girls. If you see a cop, warn her brother. Oh, no. I don't know, Alan. ACAB and all, which I know we can talk about later in this episode. So I just feel like if I knew where kidnapped teenage girls were, I might talk to cops. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Call some of the feds. Call somebody. If you don't feel like calling the local pigs, call somebody. Call your big pigs. Call the main pig. I need to speak to the big daddy. Do you mean the chief police?

I don't know. We're getting a cut between the therapist and the girls who are, uh, still in, in this underground room. And Anya Taylor joy is saying is saying things to him like, everything's so easy for you guys. You do one thing and you can predict the outcome. Yeah. I thought that was a very strange look at her.

Like that doesn't say what you think it says. Well, I do appreciate Claire because Claire's like, all right, well, we just got to fight him. Yeah. We got to beat his ass right now. And Marsha's like, Claire's smart, let's listen to her. And I was like, is Claire smart? And then fucking ATJ drops the line on her head when she's just like, listen, just because you went to karate classes, the King of Prussia mall doesn't mean you're going to be able

to do this. You ever been to the King of Prussia mall? Have I ever been to the KOP? Of course I have. KOP baby. I've only ever been to the King of Prussia Greyhound stop. Oh, okay. Pretty bleak actually. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, because it's the bus where dreams go to die.

Mm-hmm. And drugs go to sleep. Oh yeah. And diddlers go to diddle. Claire says to Anya Taylor-Joy, whose name is Casey, she says, why do you act like you're not one of us? You said she was a mercy invite. You said it, you said it right there.

So it's Casey who has removed herself from the fold. I see. It's not Claire being a real so-and-so. I could not be. So another flashback rolls in. More hunting. Dad's teaching her how to hunt and then at the end of this flashback,

her uncle walks up and hands her dad a beer, which is very like bum, bum, bum. But it shouldn't be. No, because dads be drinking while they hunt. That's why would you go into the woods with a gun without beers? You take a rifle and a 30 pack and you come home with nothing.

Nothing, not even the cans. Where did the cans go? Not even the guns. You left them. Well, the cans are in the back of with nothing. Nothing, not even the cans. Where did the cans go? Not even the guns. You left them. Well, the cans are in the back of the pickup. Oh, gotcha. So they rattle around when you're driving. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

She also says at the end of the scene, I'm better than a boy, right? Yeah. I don't know what, I don't know. Is that, is that, is that, is that, is that M. Night, is that M. Night, is that M. Night being subtle in some way? Is he trying to say something?

What would he be trying to say? I don't know. Oh no. I don't know. I don't know. Okay. So this is when we see James McAvoy in a new outfit. That little jaunty cap.

His Pete Davidson look. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah. What did he do? Why is Colin Joe so mad at him? What are you talking about? I got some news alert on Google saying Colin Joe's isn't talking to Pete Davidson anymore. Oh my God. Are they going to be okay? I don't think so. Really fucking matters to me. Apparently Pete Davidson isn't allowed back in 30 rock right now. Wow. Yeah. What did he do? I don't know. Probably made that movie that we watched. Bodies, bodies, bodies.

Bodies, bodies, bodies. I kind of liked it actually. Yeah, he was fine. He was fine. So we get, yes, Barry and his Pete, James McAvoy and his Pete Davidson look, which is his Barry persona. He's a fashion designer.

And he seems to be the one to go see the therapist, or several of them go to see the therapist? He's supposedly the one that's going, but she knows something's wiggity wiggity. But does she see more of them than just Barry on a regular basis? I don't know, Barry seems to be the only one who has the email address to get in touch with her.

Okay, that's what I wondered because I thought like, what if she was billing this man 23 times a week? The copay plus billing his insurance? Plus his toothbrush budget, as we'll find out at the end of the movie. It's fucking insane. His healthcare budget is insane. Once every three weeks, 23 new toothbrushes?

What is happening? You replace your toothbrush every three weeks? Somewhere in there. Three weeks? Maybe not, maybe two years. What's right? What's the right answer? I don't know, but three weeks seems excessive. It's fucking brand new, baby.

Well, I use an electric toothbrush. I'm just replacing the head. So I just replace it when it gets worn down. I don't know how long it takes. I don't know much about. And if you're brushing one set of teeth 23 times a day, you might want to replace your teeth after that. Yeah, your gums are receding. So it would not surprise me to learn that Dr. Fletcher was billing this man 23 times a week

because she sucks. She seems very corrupt. She is extremely corrupt. She is like letting on that she has a whole mess of patients that all have this disorder, which is DID. Yes, dissociative identity disorder. And like, yeah, but he's the best at it because he's held a job for a long time.

Yes, she says to him, all my other clients with your disorder, what if your fucking therapist said that to you? What if he was like, Katie, all my other depressed clients are doing much better than you? Every other bag of anxiety that walks in here. clients are doing much better than you. Every other bag of anxiety that walks in here. They're prettier than you.

No, you're the prettiest. That's how it's got to go. You're the best of the year. Me, I'm the prettiest. No, I think so. I'm the Barry. You're the Barry. I'm the Barry.

Of course. She also says something about doing a panel at the University of Paris, which I said in the last time we recorded this episode that I didn't think that was a real place and wasn't going to look it up. I still haven't and I still don't. University of Paris. Ah, fuck, it's real. Yeah, of course it's real.

It's the Sorbonne. University of Paris. Why not just call it the Sorbonne? Because he's from Philly. I hate this motherfucker. I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it.

I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it. I would rather watch it. I not just call it the Sorbonne? Cause he's from Philly. I hate this motherfucker. I would rather watch a movie that Yuki Washington made. Oh God, I fucking hate this. Okay, go on. So she is concerned about him.

Right, she thinks this is not Barry, but one of the other personalities pretending to be Barry. Yeah, yeah. Which means that something is afoot. And also there's three fucking abducted teenage girls. Cut back to the underground prison. She also says, you're the longest who's kept a job. I'm proud of you for keeping your job for so long.

Not letting on where he works, like it'll fucking matter. Well, it does lightly matter, which I told you in the last time we recorded this. I'm still so angry about it. I can't wait to tell you again. You have to feign the same amount of anger. Oh no, it'll be the same level of anger. Great. Then the therapist goes across the hall and talks to a lady. It's just like M. Night Shyamalan writes a woman. He's like, I've got a character for you.

I hate this. You're gonna be watching a TV and not paying attention to the person who's talking to you. Just like every woman, I'm sorry. And then you're gonna do some shopping on the phone because women be shopping. Is this when she drops the shattered people are more than us

line to this woman who's not paying attention to her? I think so. She says shit like that so many times, it makes me want to bury her alive. Having trauma doesn't make you better or worse than anybody. Yeah, no, you're the next step in human evolution. Me? If you've been crushed by being a human.

I mean, is that just what evolution is? We all just keep getting crushed? I don't know. I mean, and like, when I go see my doctor on Monday, they're going to be like, you know, creaky knees old men are kind of the next step in evolution. You're evolving into a higher being of a man with creaky knees. That arthritis in your hips is really going to take you to the next level, buddy. My next level is going to be eating this bag of candy corn. Sorry.

I know we're not supposed to eat on here anymore, but I'm giving up. Oh, this has been open for a while. Yeah. They're fucking candy corn. Oxygen just makes them more flavorful. It does. You want a pumpkin? Sure. Yeah. Put your hands up. Oh, I threw that so badly. I got it. No, don't eat it off there. Here, let's try that again. Wait, I'm gonna underhand it. Yes!

Got it. Caught it like Yuki Washington. This is now my Yuki Washington cast. Oh, that's good. Oh, that's good sugar. Just sugar. Mm. Mm.

Wow. Sugar corn syrup, confectioners glaze. That's gotta be sugar. Dextrose, is that also sugar? Yeah. Gotta admire. Honey, honey. There's honey in this. Bee sugar.

All right, well anyway. So after we've had this conversation about how me being beaten down by the world makes you a better person. Unfucking believable. We cut back to the girls who were trapped in the basement. And they see now there's a woman talking to the vegan straight edge guy. Yes, they only see the woman's body through the crack in the door.

They don't see a vegan straight edge guy. And this is when I have the thing, having this disorder is so fucking annoying because every time you need to change your personality, you have to change your entire clothing. How much laundry is Kevin doing? 23 amounts, 23 separate loads. How do you own all those clothes?

I don't have enough clothes to clothe 23 people. Katie, he's been working job for a long time. Job is paying really well. I've been working job? I have job? So the lady comes in, she's British. Yeah, and she's James McA, and she's James McAvoy. She's James McAvoy.

Yeah. Is she wearing a padded bra? I think so. Okay. He does have some sweet pecs, but I think there's a little bit more going on there. I don't think you could flex on that much. Yeah. Yeah.

She says, don't worry, I'll talk to him. He listens to me. He's not well. He's not allowed to touch you. Yeah. Yeah. And when Marsha had come back from being rejected for having peed on herself, she's like, he just wants to dance with us. No, wants to watch us dance. Watch us dance. I'm sorry. It got worse somehow. It got worse somehow. Wanting someone to dance with feels just like kind of Whitney Houston.

Yeah. God, that's such a hot jam. Oh yeah. Oh, what a bop. Kids still say bop. Uh huh. Okay. Yeah.

When I'm hanging out with kids. Yeah. That's what they say. I don't know. So we're going back and forth between this and fucking Karen, Karen Fletcher, the psychiatrist. Yeah. Yeah. She's talking to different people about the various ways in which dissociative identity

disorder is real and how she's proving that these people are more than everybody else. She's fucking insane. It's banana time. She should have her license revoked. And when, when Barry was talking to her, oh wait, no, Barry goes back and talks to her again. Yeah. And this time she's like, are you Dennis? I think you're Dennis. Right. And he's like, no, I'm Barry. That's stupid. But he's moving. He's, he's like, uh, O'm buried. That's stupid. But he's moving. He's like OCD-ing things around the room. Yeah, which we know is Dennis' thing.

He's got to keep everything clean. Because he's a straight edge vegan. That's why the bathroom's so nice. That's why the bathroom's so nice. Yeah. But he's the trauma response to, if I keep everything neat, I won't get in trouble. Yeah.

It's sad. It's sad. I'll be asked back to this movie. It's sad. From the failing's sad. I'd be asked back to this movie. It's sad. Yeah. From the failing of the mental health person who's supposed to be helping you to the failing of everything else. And to the absolute financial success that it was. That's sad. So he asks her if she's ever been married and she says, no,

she's always been alone. And then we get a shot of her in her bed where one side of her bed is just completely covered in folders of her patients. So fucked up. I was like, Oh, so she's just, she's married to her job. She's married to her job. Thank you so for laying that out for me. And also what if your therapist was sleeping with your file? It's the subtlety by which he explains things to you. I mean, it's just painting a picture, you know what I mean? And spoiler alert for the movie Signs, this is just once again, oh, these aliens that are allergic to water are coming to Earth. Stupid fucking idiots. You can see it from space.

fucking idiots. You can see it from space. It's the only planet that's got it readily available. You can see it right there. Anywho. So we get a scene where Dennis refers to the girls as sacred food. Gross. Yeah. Yeah. And, and, and, yeah.

So then we meet, we meet Hedwig. Yes, he's, he's sitting in the doorway wearing a hoodie and says his name is Hedwig. Yeah, and he's the nine year old. He tells the girls that he says he's on the move. And he says, but he's done awful things to people and he'll do awful things to you, which we just watched in the trailer and I got so fucking mad about.

And again, McAvoy doing a bang up job, believable nine year old. Oh yeah, I guess so. He does the like, I just need a hot dog, which felt very number four Michael Keaton in Multiplicity, when he's like, I got a wallet and he's putting a piece of pizza into it. I don't know, man. Ridiculous.

I just can't, I can't take it seriously. I hope that multiplicity was one of the inspirations for this film. It's a fantastic film. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. So yeah, yeah. ATJ like kind of talks to Hedwig and she's trying to get in there to, uh, figure if she can use him to get out of this situation. Yeah, and he's giving up information.

He says things like, it took forever to get this place safe from the nosy bodies that work here. Yeah. Work where? Wherever work is. Yeah, wherever work is. And we find out that Dennis had followed them

for four days. Yeah. And I was like, who? Because she wasn't with them. And it opened till right now. Yeah. So, yeah, yeah, yeah. Great. Then Hedwig leaves.

Yeah. They find a hollow patch in the ceiling. And then Claire, once again, taking care of business, opens a fucking hole up,ets up into the vent system. Die hard style. I mean, movies would really have you believe that someday you will have to crawl through a vent. Yeah.

Do you think you'll ever have to crawl through a vent? Well, someday you'll, I'm not, come on. They don't make vents that are six foot two. Like, I'm not a vent person. You know, I'm not either. Yeah. I'll probably just wait here. I was watching some things about the Egyptian pyramids.

They were talking about how like the, the like hallways you have to traverse are three and a half feet tall. And I was like, well, I'm, I'm never going there. Three and a half feet tall. Yeah. You have to bend in half and walk down. And I was like, nothing is worth me going down there to see. Wow. No. You got a picture? I'll take it. I'll look at the picture.

Looks cool. Look at that. Hey, how about that? So Claire basically abandons the other two. Yeah. And she also does the most annoying thing, which is she hops down in the next hole. She finds an event. Yeah. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Go as far as the holes will take you. Yeah. Yeah. It's got to go outside somewhere. It's a vent. It's a literally right there in the name. That's so true. You could keep going till you found the outside wall. Yeah. It's got to go outside somewhere. It's a vent. It's literally right there in the name. That's so true.

You could keep going until you found the outside wall. Yeah. Or something. Or yeah. A room that doesn't have a light on something, do something different. But yeah, she gets caught right away. She hides in a locker. He finds her. She's dirty. So now she has to take her sweater off. And he's unbuttoning his shirt. Yeah.

It's just like, oh, god damn it. Oh yeah, you wanna get a little sex assaulty, right? Just a little, mm, a little for salt. It's so weird that the child sex abuse is so on screen. Yeah. So evident, but then he's like, I'm gonna be subtle with him molesting these teenage girls. Why?

It's not subtle anyway. Yeah, no. I just think from his perspective. God, I fucking hate this movie. So Barry returns to the doctor the next day, cause Barry is like emailing her in the middle of the night, I guess when Dennis goes dormant, Barry takes back over. Yeah. They keep talking about the light.

They're banned from the light or they're taking the light or they're in the light, which means that they are the forefront personality at that time. Right. When you find out that Kevin is the base body that is inhabited by these 23 other personalities. Fucking Kevin. we find out that Kevin is the base body that is inhabited by these 23 other personalities. Fucking Kevin. And, oh yeah, yi, yi.

So she's convinced it's Dennis and she's talking to Dennis and she's trying to get Dennis out of there. I think this is after she gives the panel presentation where she talks about the Russian weightlifter who can lift three times his body weight is from someone's personality. And she's like, is this the ultimate doorway to all things we call unknown? Well, like, no, it probably isn't. Saying shit like that is why nobody takes you seriously in the science world. The reason I was watching the Egyptology thing is I've been, or the thing about Egypt is

I've been deep diving into pseudo archaeology. What is pseudo archaeology? Pseudo archaeology is shit that people make up. They're like, oh, humans have been around for like 12 million years, like deal with it dog. Wait, that's like science people make up or just that like, You can put pseudo in front of science as well for the science that they have. Okay. But it's like, they have like a strong feeling.

Okay. These are, these are Facebook scientists. Yes. They're very much like, yes, they, they, yes, that's a good way to put it. Like, um, they're your uncle who knows everything about everything. Like this mountain is shaped like a pyramid. So it was probably built by aliens. Oh, that kind of shit.

You've been married four times. You're currently single. So yes, her saying that, what if this is the next step in human evolution and the thing that will open, and she's like, no, you dumb fuck, that's not what's going to happen. And you're not treating your patients.

No, she is absolutely not treating him. She's using him as a means to make herself famous. Publish or perish, Karen. Not treating him and the hundreds of other Philadelphians that have the same disorder. How many people in Phil, I mean, honestly, if you were to tell me that Philadelphia was the epicenter of people with personality disorders, I would say yes.

Yes, it fucking is. Yeah, listen, I know people in Philly got a bit of an attitude problem. No, don't start with me. So she's talking to a person dressed as Barry, saying, I'm talking to Dennis, who likes watching young girls dance naked. Why is Dennis even there, assuming that Dennis is a thing?

Because Barry made the appointment and if Dennis misses the appointment as Barry, it'll set off alarms and he can't do his naughty business so the beast can come. Right because the ultimate goal is not for these girls to dance for Dennis. For somebody. The ultimate goal is for them to be eaten by the beast. Yeah, their sacred food. Their sacred food. Yeah, he needs their power.

I cannot wait to talk about the beast. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, I've got the power. Oh, God. And we find out that Patricia and Dennis have both been banned. Banned from the light. And so he leaves and I just have a note that says M night.

I assume when I wrote it, that's how it was supposed to sound. Yeah. We get a great, oh, here's his scene, his Hitchcock scene where he is talking about going to Hooters. And I think it sucks. I think it fucking sucks. I think he fucking sucks. It's so funny to call it a Hitchcock scene.

What? Cause he, even reviews are like, yeah, it's homage to Hitchcock. He always puts himself in the movie. No, no. Watch Alfred Hitchcock walk a small dog outside the window of a restaurant. Yeah. He never spoke. Right? Did he ever have a speaking line? I don't think so. I don't think so. You wouldn't, I mean, there are movies. I don't know where he is. Sure. Yeah. And then he's right behind you in the room. That's so weird. You're you've been dead a long time. Get out of my fucking house.

And he's like, I'm sorry, you're not a beautiful blonde. I have to go. Ouch. Who says I'm not a beautiful blonde? Then he slaps me across the face. And across the ass. Well, it was a different time. No, it was never okay. Oh, so now we get a scene of Marsha and Casey talking and Patricia brings them a meal and then like she's brushing Casey's hair. Yeah. But she does it wrong. She's hurting Casey and puts flowers behind their ears.

It's very weird. It's very dumb. It takes them to the kitchen where they're like exchanging factoids. It's sort of an industrial kitchen as well. It is, I wonder where Job is. Where Job is at Job. She says something like, Asian people's music aids digestion.

And tigers have only 30 teeth. Is that true? I was like, that's still a lot of teeth for a tiger. Tiger teeth are huge. How many teeth do we have? Like 32. Fuck you tigers. I win. Yeah, their teeth are way better than ours.

Yeah. So at this point, Marsha decides that she's going to hit James McAvoy with a chair. Yeah, fuck yeah, Marsha. Step up. Now Marsha. Actually, this is a lesson. Kids, if you're going to hit someone with a chair,

hit them in the fucking head. And don't stop. Don't stop. Don't, hit him in the fucking head and don't stop. Don't stop. Don't just hit them in the back and then stand there. Anyone can take a chair shot to the back. It's true. Literally anyone. Your grandma could take it.

It's like getting hit in the back with 30 light bulbs. It's fine. It's fine. Yeah. Toughen up, rub some dirt in it. Pussy. So he's got knife her. He gets her into her own personal closet, much like Claire's in her own closet.

And he's already made Casey go into her room and shut the door and she does it. She listens. I think I would maybe not be going. What are you gonna do? You're a kid. And he makes her take her skirt off because it's dirty. And that might be why I have another note that says M. Knight. Yes, that's it. Because it's a very loving shot of her body. And it's like, this isn't lascivious.

With him at waist level holding a knife against her stomach. Yeah. And he says, you've never truly suffered. That's why we chose you. And this is why we need to beat our children. Come the fuck on. Are we almost done? It's this movie almost over.

It's, I hate it. I have to be honest with you. Yeah, I hate it. I'm like looking at the rest of my notes being like, do we have to? We did this once. I know, and I'm very upset. So we get more scenes with Anya, Taylor, Joy, and Hedwig. And like, is this when she wakes up and he's in bed with her?

And asks her to kiss him? And he says, you might be pregnant now? Yeah. She's trying to get him to sneak her into his room because says, you might be pregnant now. Yeah. She's trying to get him to sneak her into his room because he says there's a window there. Yeah. Yeah.

And this is being cut with scenes of Barry back at Dr. fucking Fletcher's and she's talking about a high school students being on a field trip at his place of work. And they took his hands and put them under their shirts on there. What is this? I guess it's his version of events of him attacking youngsters. He wouldn't still have that job though. What do you, I don't know. What is job? I mean, but when you get down to it, I'm eating the candy again. I'm sorry. When you get down to it, his job is a real place and I don't think they would

like their name to be smirched in such a way. A real place that has been in business for like a hundred years. And has field trips of children going there. Yeah. So I'm going to go ahead and say, it's all a mess. And she says to Dennis, I could use Kevin's full name and Beetlejuice him into existence. But I know that would be chaos for all of you. Why did you just never say his name?

Okay. Keep in mind, dear listener, that this entire time she's assuming that he has three teenage girls trapped at job. Yeah, you're right. She's very concerned about the fact that he has three teenage girls trapped at job. So in order to talk or to deal with that, she's not dealing with it. She knows where his job is.

Yep, she goes there later. She drives there. She gets a cab there. She tells Dennis that the beast is a fantasy. Cut back to Hedwig, who should be at the therapist's office taking her, taking Anya Taylor-Joy up to his room. He dances at her, it's very upsetting. Yeah.

Because an adult acting like a child is always upsetting. Always weird. And then she's like asking about the window and he's like, oh, the window is just a drawing. Oh, you were gonna try and escape and he's mad at her now. This is where she finds out that he has a walkie talkie that he has stolen from Dennis.

So she gets on the walkie talkie. She gets somebody, she gets somebody on the other side. Somebody who doesn't believe her that she's real. Which is such a dumb callback at the end of the movie. It's fucking socks. It's like such a window into M. Night's brain. So much of this is windows into M. Night's brain. When Dr. Fletcher is talking to Dennis, she's like, I just want to know how you and Patricia,

the other undesirable personality came to be aligned. she's like, I just want to know how you and Patricia, the other undesirable personality came to be aligned. It's like, was that meant to be in parentheses? Like, was that, did you, did you mean to say that out loud? Yes. It's like the video of Kevin Sorbo as Hercules just being like, disappointed. How could we have predicted he would be a fucking moron? Oh my god, what a piece of shit.

A favorite of our friends at GodawfulMovies. So, she attacks Hedwig and then Patricia comes out and puts her back in a room, but she finds a nail that she's going to use as a weapon. Right. And then we get an uncle flashback. and puts her back in a room, but she finds a nail that she's gonna use as a weapon. Right. And then we get an uncle flashback. Yeah. Which is her uncle sexually assaulting a small child in the woods as a rutting animal.

It's fucking disgusting. I hate it. It's awful. I hate that someone's brain thought of this. I hate it. I hate that this is... Yeah, I hate it. I hate that this is. I yeah, I hate it. That every time there was a showing in this movie, the entire theater didn't just go, Nope. And get up and walk out. I mean, let's see where he's going with this. Yeah. Let's

see what comes of this. Like you fucking know what's going to of it. In this flashback, she has a gun on him and he just takes it away. Yeah, yeah, post the assault, she has the gun on him. Right, correct, he's dressed again. Yeah. Great, fucking fantastic. Yep, and then we cut back to the doctor's office and we see that Barry has sent 20 emails.

So there's 23 personalities in Barry. Right, right, right, right. Three of them did not send emails. So there's 23 personalities in Barry. Right, right, right, right. Three of them did not send emails. Yeah. The other 20 did. Is Kevin his own personality or it's 23 plus Kevin? 23 and me, if you will. 23 and me, Kevin started that company.

Kevin started that company. He had to find out who he really was. I can't do this anymore, Alan. I have a to say. She says, great. Thanks, M. Night. And then we cut back to Anna Taylor Joy crying in a corner because we want to see young people cry. So, Dennis goes to meet the Beast at a train station. Amtrak is coming in. And he's there and he has flowers for the Beast. Which then means that he just turns into the Beast

because he strips off most of his clothes except for his pants. It's also very funny because there is a very famous Marvel superhero named The Beast. Okay. And it's just like, well, there's already. What's his deal? What's The Beast's deal?

He's like a big blue gorilla looking guy that's also a scientist. He's an X-Man. Oh. Yeah, he was played by Kelsey Grammer in the older movies. No, he wasn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Type in Kelsey Grammer, The Beast, please. Do wasn't. Type in Kelsey Grammer the beast, please.

Do I have to? I want to see what this looks like. I'm doing it in incognito window because I really don't want my phone to think I care. Kelsey Grammer. Don't do it in incognito. You're just going to see his dick if you do it in incognito window.

Oh my god. What the fuck is that? It looks like shit. Oh my god. What is that? It looks like shit. Oh my God. What year? What is happening? Is he wearing a Steelers jacket? No, those are the X-Men colors.

I would love it if he was just wearing like a Steelers starter jacket. Okay. Well, anyway, you were right. Okay, we got to get through this because I can't do this any longer. All right, buddy. I'm not yelling at you. I'm yelling at everything. We're told that like, I mean, Dr. Fletcher is like, he can't be real, there must be limits to what a human can become. But what we see is that there aren't limits to what a human can become. But what we see is that there aren't limits to what a human can become. She was right all along. It's true because suddenly you become this giant dick veined all over your body man.

Yes. So vascular. Just looks like a Snickers bar right through here. It's disgusting. Oh God. And they're talking about like her, her, her having a patient who was blind, but some of her personalities could see. And it's like, you speculated that her optical nerves regenerated because of her beliefs, which feels some very like pray the cancer away shit,

which is dangerous to our society. Just what a stigmatization of mental health. No, you think? Sorry. Whatever. Yes, on every fucking level of like not supporting people. Oh, God damn it. So Dr. Fletcher goes to see Kevin and she goes to his job, which is at the fucking Philadelphia zoo.

So the Philadelphia zoo. And the beasts see the zoo, the beast, the beast, the zoo. Maybe they're connected. Maybe they're not. They are. So she is going and she's like, Hey, we're having this great conversation. I get to go make a tinkle. I'm going to run down to the bathroom. Yeah. And she doesn't go to the bathroom. She goes and finds Marsha. She sees, she finds Claire. Claire. Yeah. And Claire gets dragged away and then she sees the beast eating Claire?

No, no, no. Is that later? No, that's Casey that sees the beast eating Claire. Oh, I see, I see. At this point, she sees Claire and James McAvoy, I can't even remember what personality he has at this point, comes up behind her and says, they'll never reach their full potential. To which I was like same girl.

And then he chloroforms the doctor. This isn't where she has the stabbing happens later. Yeah. Doesn't it? Yeah. Katie, talk to me about when he's squeezing her to death. We're not there yet, but that's fine. I'm going to go. I'm going to skip me about when he's squeezing her to death. We're not there yet, but that's fine.

I'm going to, I'm going to skip ahead. Why is he squeezing her to death? Cause he's a boa constrictor. Because what is the beast? The beast is an amalgam of animals at the zoo. He can literally climb walls like a lizard. Yeah. And run across the ceiling like an ape and squeeze people to death like a boa constrictor.

He hugs her to death. I didn't realize any of this while watching the movie. I was just like, well, that dick vein man is going to be strong. Yeah, obviously. I mean, if you have that many dick veins, you are strong as fuck. If I knew anything about dick veins. So strong. So strong. Such strength. Such power. She tries to stab him with a knife, which is like a butter knife. And it breaks because he's super tough now because what? He's an armadillo to armadillo.

And that's it. He hugs her to death anyway. Yeah. So A.T.J. now has some keys that she got. Oh, because she found their video diaries on the computer. She's on his computer. They because she found their video diaries on the computer. She's on his computer. They've all been recording video diaries. One of the personalities is diabetic, giving herself a shot of insulin and says, why do I have to be diabetic? Which is like, you don't, if you say this is a shot of insulin, you don't have to also

tell me that they're diabetic. I as an American of age to watch this movie, know what that means. You don't have to write it all down. You have to write every word down and then have someone say them. Every one of their person or their, their, their bios starts off with, hi, I'm a new personality. I'm not the same person you just saw. Hi, it's me. Someone else. You can tell by my shirt. Hello me. It's me again.

I knew we weren't going to get through this episode for a second time without you saying it again. But yes, she finds the keys because she sees an episode of Barry picking up his hat and the keys are underneath the HBO television show. Barry, starring Bill Hader. You loved that show. And yes, she sees under his hat is the keys. And she's like, wait, I can unlock this mystery. I am in this room. She picks up the hat, there's the keys. I'm the keys now, dog.

She opens Marcia's door. Marcia's been disemboweled, I think, but not really well. Right. She looks like shit. It looks like shit. The effects are terrible. And then we see that the next sacred meal is being eaten because Claire is getting yoinked across the floor and chowed down on. Yes.

She gets dragged away and it's just chewing her tum tum. Yeah. Okay. That's where her sacred meats are. Um, that where everyone's sacred meats are. Are they all in the same place? I guess I don't know. Okay. I guess the other woman was also had her hot dogs on the outside. So I guess, barely not even good hot dogs. No. Tom Savini said push off. Yeah. She just locks him in a room, which is fine. Yeah. And then he gently pushes the door open. Yeah. Yeah. You liked this though. I recall from last week that it bends and it's like bends

the lock rather than breaks. Yeah. And it's like, oh, you're so strong. Yeah. Uh, and then she, she finds a note that the doctor had written that says, say his name, say his name, say his name. It is not Beyonce. It is Kim, Kevin Wimbledon, dimpled in Kevin Wendell crumb. That's what I said. Wimbledon, dimpled in. You were really close. She yells Kevin Wendell crumb. And I wrote, there are still 20 plus minutes to this movie.

And we get a flashback of his mom yelling at him, gonna beat him with a wire hanger, Joan Crawford style. He is now he's Kevin in James McAvoy's body and he suddenly feels bad and he goes, is it still September 18th, 2014? And Anya Taylor-Joy just goes, no. What day is it then? How long has it been?

You've been underground for some time. Is that recent? Is it a year ago? How long has Dr. Fletcher been keeping this charade going? And he's like, yo, I got a shotgun. Some shells over there. Get it. Shoot me.

Do it your damn self. It is insane to ask a teenage girl you've taken captive to kill you instead of killing yourself. That's true, that's true. But then he starts like changing channels. Yeah, he becomes Patricia, and then he starts becoming the beast,

and then other people are showing up. He rips open Anya Taylor-Joy's calf, so that's something. Yeah, what animal does that? The beast. Oh, the beast. He's an amalgam. He's rooster. He's cock fighting her leg. Yeah. I love that. It's got a wobble on everything. Wobble?

Waddle. Waddle. Waddle. Yeah. Yeah. She, she gets the gun in the shells. There's a whole ass cage down there. She just goes ahead and gets in there. Yep. And we get a flashback of her dad having died and her pervert uncle is like, sorry, not pervert uncle, fucking rapist uncle is like,

hey, you're gonna have to live with me now. I'm gonna take care of you. I'm gonna take care of you. Gross. Yeah, and James McAvoy, meanwhile, is gone full gorilla and he's bouncing around in the ceiling, breaking all the lights. But not full gorilla because he fucking speaks English. He says,

your gun cannot hurt me. Can't you see I am not human? Listen, M. Night. And then you can't have it both ways. He bends the bar. He passes his Ben bars check. Yes. And she has taken her shirt off or takes her shirt off. And she sees, and he sees that she has only a little cami. Little cami. And she is covered in scars from the attacks from her uncle. He says, you are different from the rest.

Your heart is pure. Which is when, in this this movie that my friend Colleen laughed so loud that everyone else in the theater laughed as well. Oh my God. He's also screaming rejoice at her. Yeah. Like it's a religious revival.

What are we meant to take from this? That, Katie. Yeah. If you've been through hell, you're the better for it. Sir? Sir? Sir? Sir, Nite Shyamalan. And also, if you've been traumatized,

you can never do anything wrong. Uh-huh. So then the beast takes off, and she is in the zoo. And a guy finds her, and he's the guy that was on the walkie talkie. No, he's not. He's not? This is a different guy who is just smoking indoors. That that was on the walkie-talkie. No, he's not. He's not? This is a different guy who is just smoking indoors.

That's right. Finds her in a cage. How often do people come down here to smoke? A couple of times a day. Then what has been going on? The lion's eating it when you're smoking. Like they were in this industrial kitchen of the Philadelphia Zoo. Was nobody down there heating up their leftovers at lunchtime?

It was off zoo times. People work. He was just, yeah, just smoking indoors until he finds Casey in the cage with a gun. He takes her upstairs past all the enclosures. I swore to God something bad was going to happen to her at this point. Like the guy was going to be like, actually I'm a bad man too. She turns, he's like helping her and she turns around and it's just a lion. I'm a bad man too. He's like helping her and she turns around and it's just a lion.

But no, so we get up to the ground, to the zoo, to the fucking zoo. I don't know why I didn't just say that. And we meet Vince, who is the guy who had the radio, because he goes, oh, and puts his hands over his mouth. And I was like, that's not a comedy beat that will haunt him for the rest of his fucking life. Whatever. And so she's in a cop car and this lady cop comes up to her and she's like, Hey, your

uncle's going to be coming for you. And she just looks at the lady cop. Stares at her. And the lady cop goes, oh. No? I don't believe this for a moment? Wait, there's no demonstrable examples in history where the cops had just given people back to their abusers? Jeffrey Dahmer would beg to dig her. I also just want to comment on the fact that Anya Taylor-Joy's lip liner looks better than mine their abusers. Jeffrey Tomberwood. I also just want to comment on the fact that Anya Taylor Joy's lip liner looks better than mine when I've just put it on. And she has been underground for a days.

Keep in mind she's also a Vivich. That's true. She lives deliciously. Yeah. She made a pact with the devil. I'm going to live deliciously with some more Brocks autumnal mix. She, she, the chocolate ones always weird me out. I like the chocolate ones. I'm enjoying them. Okay, all right.

There's a lot in here. Have you been picking around them? No, no, no, it's just been up here. Probably the, the ash action figure's been going through it. Yeah, I noticed that. It's weird that you have them set up to look at you. Hey buddy. Hey.

So we get this like, this montage shot of the basement dwelling of Dennis, Kevin, Barry, let's see if I can get all 23. Patricia Hedwig, Alvin Simon Theodore. John Paul, George and Ringo. John Garfield, Odie Nermal. Arlene. Arlene, how could I forget?

With those sexy lips. Why did you have sexy lips? It's fucking bad shit. So there's 23 toothbrushes. Yeah, Costco level toothbrushes. There it is. Yeah, it's just, oh, good Lord. There is one last great scene here for James McAvoy where the cameras are

switching back and forth between the mirror and his actual face. And he's rapidly changing personalities, which must be incredibly challenging until the mirror, the camera stops switching. It just stays in one mirror while he keeps doing it. It's crazy. He's doing it and the cameraman quit. Yeah, I can't do this anymore, JM. It's just working so hard. So yeah. Yeah.

We, okay, so now we're in a diner. Everyone in this diner is absolutely entranced by this news broadcast that's on, which we learned that the killer, the kidnapper, became an amalgam of animals in the zoo. And everyone's like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. No one's like, what? And they call him the beast.

The horde. The horde, I'm sorry. The horde. And the waitress is like, hey, wait a minute. Wasn't there a guy in a wheelchair that also had a funny name? About 15 years ago. Camera pans over.

Oh my God. Bruce Twillis is sitting right next to her. And he says, Mr. Glass. I hate this movie. Which is like, oh good, so this movie is a callback to a decent movie from M. Night Shyamalan called Unbreakable. I hate this movie.

Yeah. Negative 23, Hugh. One for each fucking personality. Actually make it negative 24 because Kevin deserves one too. What about the beast? Take it to 25. Negative 25, shit.

So this is his filthiest movie I've ever seen. It's very, I mean, well, we did watch a movie where children fuck and then have a baby that dies. It was so stupid. I liked the concept. Oh, that beach makes you old? But then again, I like the concept of this one too. I like the idea of like, okay,

this person has dissociative identity disorder, they've kidnapped you and now you have to like wrangle with all their personalities. It's everything else that's shit. He should walk into a room, go, I have an idea. And the group of writers go, come back in a week. Yeah. We'll have a movie for you.

And we're gonna write you your own little part. Oh, can I go to Hooters? You can go to Hooters. I love their wings. Can this be set in, yes, it can be set in Philadelphia. Fuck. Where's the cabin in the, what did he call it? He didn't call it cabin at the end of the world.

Which was a good name. Knock at the door. Knock at the woods. Knock at, anyway. Knock at the cabin, knock at the cabin. And like that movie just like shoe horns in the couple being in Philadelphia. You're like, dog, do you owe Philadelphia money? What is happening right now? Ow, ow, my chest.

I'm going to give this movie negative 76 for Philadelphia. Ben Franklin thanks you. Suck my dick Independence Hall. Suck my flaps Philadelphia, truly. I love you Philly. Fuck. While we're on the note of bad things, why don't you read that in recent review? You want me to read that review? I do, we read it last time and it fucking fired me up.

Oh, we just got a new review, it just came in. Is it a good one? It's from Oh Peaches. It says love it, five stars, really loving the show, found it about a month ago and now it's one of my favorite show. There's never a bad episode in my opinion. Thank you.

Love the energy and friendship of Katie and Alan, all names spelled correctly. We love you too. This is from. This is the one I want though. Cockadile. Cockadile. Cockadile gives us one star and says,

good until they get political. Let me go ahead and expand this so I can get the entire thing. I would give this a four if they weren't such, get the great gravitas in this, liberal dum-dums. Why not a five, crocodile? Where did we lose that one for you outside of being liberal dum-dums? No, you are a woman.

Oh, stupid pussy. They're way too old to have the opinions they do. What is that? What is that? They never miss a chance to call out a man or bad cops. In what world do you not call out a man and bad cops? I mean, miss your chance, buddies. Constantly stating ACAB, which is pretty cringe.

No, it's pretty fucking true. Which is a pretty cringe take for a middle-aged person. At what point do you become a cop appreciator? What age is cop appreciation age? 63. Okay. But when it comes to bad women, they either glaze over to make excuses for them.

I love making excuses. I'm an excuse maker. I love making excuses. I'm an excuse maker. I love bad women. One star. Cockadile. You two can suck my flaps. That is unintentionally one of the best reviews we've ever gotten.

Truly. Because if I'm looking for a podcast, I go ping, check, check, check. That all sounds great. Yes, it sounds like they're youthful. It's youthful and have good ideas, and they're on the right side of history. Listen, we, I'm gonna say this.

We have a platform. Yes. It's not a giant platform, but it's not a small platform either. And when I looked at our Spotify stats, like 44% of our listenership is under the age of 35. Is that true? It is true.

That's on Spotify, so people using Apple podcasts might skew older or other pod catchers, but for Spotify, which is where we get most of our listens from is Spotify. So that's who needs to be engaged with politics. That's who needs to be voting. So if we don't say that you should get off your ass and vote for Kamala Harris. What are we doing? What are we doing with this platform?

Except making dick jokes. And that's fine most of the year. And as well as saying like, we love trans and queer folks and like support your friends and like Black Lives Matter and all the shit we've said over the years, like if you don't like it, it's not a fucking, you're not a plane. You don't have to announce your departure. Just leave.

And also why do people think you're supposed to get more conservative as you get older? Is it taxes? I don't know. I'm not, I'm not getting any more. I'm getting more liberal. I'm getting worse. I'm getting worse. My liberalism is a disease and I'm fucking dying. Anyway, vote for Kamala Harris. Yeah. I mean, fuck it. It's the, it's the, I mean, it's the better option for the cop says me ACAP. Yeah. I mean, there's that whole thing of, of, of voting to, for, to, to, to lessen the evils that are done to people. So

I feel like we will have more rights under Kamala Harris. Sure. So let's do that. Yeah. Maybe you'll have the rights of your body. Maybe that'll maybe you'll have bodily autonomy. Yeah, that'd be rad. Yeah, it would be. Katie. Yeah. Speaking of bodily autonomy, what are we doing next week? Next week, we're doing a movie of your choosing. It was supposed to be this week. No, yeah. And now we're going to watch it next week. It's called oddity. Oddity. It's on the shutter. Why don't you give them a little who's a, what's it about it? I won't want to spoil anything. So I won't tell you what happened in the film,

but I will say there is some fucking excellent spookery in this movie. Okay, great. Give me a little, a little goosing bumps. I could use some little ghosting bumps. Yeah. So go check that out. Uh, we're going to stop doing this so I can hit stop and hope the file doesn't go away. If it goes away, I'm not doing this for a third time. If we, if it goes away, it's M. Night.

He's done. He's done this for us, yeah. To us, not for us, to us. Fubo. And... Wow. Go find stuff on T-Public. If you wanna be a Patron, go to Patreon,

search Patreon Werewolf Ambulance, T-Public Werewolf Ambulance. If you go to any of our now ghost ship social medias, they have link trees, um, that you could find all of our sources and, and you can also find suicide hotline and where to, uh, donate money to keep abortion safe and legal. Um, and beloved Asheville beloved Asheville, go to that out there and help them. Yeah. We'll make sure to put that too liberal for you.

Cogadile is a too socialist. The worst thing is cockatiel kind of love the name. Fucking funny. I feel like in another life we'd be friends. I was driving home today and I saw a yard that was filled with really great Halloween decorations on a Trump side and I was like, no, you're not ours. So come back next week for Oddity. Enjoy the spooky season, go watch horror movies.

Yeah, I've been watching a lot of movies just for pleasure. I will tell you that I made Rob watch The Beyond last night. I told him it was building character for him. And what did he think of it? He did not agree. He's wrong. Yeah. I love that you've come around on Fulci. I mean, I'm a twisted old fruit these days.

Thank you so much for listening to another episode of Werewolf Amulets. Bye. Empty. Empty. So empty! Many acts aint on deadpools, so many sightings at the pool No way to end Finland's cute, fulfilled reviews Killer glans and leather face, killing him in outer space Appearance on glassy encased, please make eye-catching your grave E.M.T.

Borrowed and comedy reviews, crying, from Wayne's and Stephen King EMT We live deliciously, bad temper, trees obese, nicely gone to daddy A pair of normal active ditties from Mr. Rogers City EMT, EMT