Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 515- Leprechaun Returns (2018)

Episode Date: March 24, 2025

This week, by the sheer willpower of one listener, we are discussing the 2018 SyFy channel film "Leprechaun Returns." You'll be in a hole if I don't get me gold, etc. Do you like cable television films? You may enjoy Episode 237- "Scarecrow." Whoops. The regular lineup of links! You can support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and listen to a ton of action movie episodes. This month, the Patróns are choosing the candidates! leave us a message at 412-407-7025 hang out with some cool listeners at https://discord.gg/DutFjx3cBD  buy merch at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance the best place to reach us is at [e-mail] we're on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance sorta on Twitter @werebulance sorta on Instagram @werewolfambulance www.werewolfambulance.com if you feel you really must lodge a complaint with us, please do it on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance because we are probably not gonna see that, ever If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously, we have the best listeners, hands down.

I was just describing my depression to Alan and he hit me with I think the worst joke I've ever heard That can't be true. It is true Tell the people let them decide coward. I Asked if Katie thought then Marilyn Manson was sad Because the Flintstones are a thing anymore and I'll never have a character named Marilyn Manstone on the Flintstones. Ah! That's a good piece of business. Am I laughing or crying? Yes!

It feels like both. Oh man. Wow, no one told me this was a sci-fi original movie. Nobody fucking told me. Dear Yogurt Closet. Yeah. No one told me this was a sci-fi original movie. Nobody fucking told me. Dear Yogurt Closet. Yeah. I did like knowing that Yogurt Closet was a randomly assigned Reddit username.

That's wild. That is wild. That's rude. Also, is it true? Yes, I think so because who puts underscores in their names in America 2025? It's true. You're gonna be Robert Blumkin.

Enjoy your name, see you later buddy. Robert Blumkin, 1986. 69 420. There you go. Leprechaun returns. This one's for you. Yogurt closet, occasional vagina user. That made me laugh. And for all of the listeners out there, I watched this movie via the DVD that the yogurt closet sent to us. I mean, talk about doing the work.

Talk about putting in the effort. We agreed to do this movie before we knew that the DVD was coming to us. Yeah. And thus, because there was only one copy, I had to rent it. And I just feel like Alan always gets the spoils. You know why? Because he's a man. Don't you not have a way to play DVDs spoils, you know, why? Cause he's a man. Don't you not have a way to play DVDs?

No, it turns out you can play them in a PlayStation. Okay. All right. Cause a while ago you told me you had no way to play a DVD. What I said was I don't know how to play a DVD. Very different thing. It's like, I'll put it in my laptop. No, I'll put it in the toaster oven. I don't know what it does. No one told me that this was a sci-fi channel, original film. And in the era when they'd stopped being science fiction and it was just, we're sci-fi, S-Y-F-Y. That's not how you spell it.

No. No one also, no one told me there would be a man covered in green jello or anything like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's our opening.

That's it. A little man, green jello. Here we are. Not Warwick Davis didn't come back. No, it's a, I guess it sounded like he thought it'd be too physically taxing. Sure. He's an older gentleman now. And he took time off after having kids.

I'm serious. That's what his Wikipedia said. Why is that funny? You mentioned get paternity leave. off after having kids. I'm serious. That's what is Wikipedia said. Why is that funny? Men should get paternity leave. No, it's just funny for not coming back for the 30th fucking leprechaun movie. And this is the most reason, right? This is where it ends. As far as I know. Okay. I'm sure there's another one coming tomorrow. Cause this sets up a sequel that I'm sure never got made and I will not look up.

Oh man. Uh, yeah, this is holy shit. This is a movie. I came into it with a super bad attitude. I want to be really honest. I was just like, this is going to be awful. Yeah. And then I saw the sci-fi logo and I was like, fuck. And I thought about that scarecrow movie with Lacey Chabert, which was not the scarecrow movie, and was like around the same time as this one, I think. You know, once a week we get a,

I think I found the movie that Katie did. Is it ever? Often it's ones we've already done. Fucking look it up, baby. Search scarecrow on Spotify under our show. And then we get sometimes, this one guy vaguely looks like a scarecrow in the movie. And I was like, well, you do know Katie.

I'm glad that people are so invested in helping me find this thing that probably doesn't exist or was the last one we did where they were like the military group with all the constant narration. It may have been the movie you saw. I don't know. I don't know. Oh man. I fuck.

If I go to my grave not knowing about Scarecrow movie, that's very appropriate for my whole thing. I will be dressed as a Scarecrow at your wedding. My wedding? To death. And I'll run in and say, you never caught me bitch. And then run back out of your funeral and come back in dressed as myself. Will you be crying when you come back in? Yeah. Okay, great. I'll probably be crying when you come back in? Yeah.

Okay, great. I'll probably be crying as the scarecrow. No, you have to be totally gleeful as the scarecrow. I'm sorry, you know me. I cannot shut them tears off. Get yourself something from the nacho cart and try again. Speaking of which, if you go to our Reddit, you can find, I posted a link to another of my bands

that someone recently, one of the guys I was in a band with had remastered and has put it up on Bandcamp. Oh, which one? It's called Numbers Are Neutral. Oh, yeah, yeah, Numbers Are Neutral. And I forgot that there is definitely a part in one of the songs where you can hear me openly sob. Oh my God.

You know what, Alan? No one has as much emo credit as you. Truly no one. No one. Oh man, if only I'd worn horn rim glasses back in the day. You should wear horn rim glasses now. I should. I would look like an excellent shop teacher.

Yeah, yeah. It's a good look for you. Yeah. We almost wore the same flannel today. All right. Leprechaun returns. Leprechaun, and does he. And does he.

He appears for the second time in this movie riding the Greyhound bus. And I was like, yep, that checks out. Like this motherfucker would. You ever go through a period of life where you were riding the Greyhound a lot? I've never been on a Greyhound bus. I've done the Chinatown bus.

Sure. And I've done the, what's that, Dollar Bus? Megabus. Megabus. Greyhound bus is a special kind of despair. Just absolute dreams went to die. Just absolute sad shit. Sure. Yeah. A Chinatown bus, you at least have the thrill of, you're 87% sure that you're smuggling drugs.

Yeah, oh yeah. There is a live chicken somewhere. Maybe in the cargo hold, maybe in the people hold. Maybe in the people hold. But yeah, no, I've never gray hounded it. So yes, we open on Jennifer Aniston's daughter having a dream. Yes, it took me a long yes, we open on Jennifer Aniston's daughter having a dream. Yes, it took me a long time to realize

she was Jennifer Aniston's daughter and that this movie presupposes that all of the others, except for the first one, didn't happen. Is this the Halloween remake's fault? Where the Halloween, that latest Halloween movie was like, one's the only movie that happened, the rest of them were ignoring. Great question, yes.

Yeah, okay. But also I don't hate it. No, it's fine. Cause I mean, is he going to start rapping at some point? Like does he have to use all of the life skills he's gained over the last 30 years? Cutting off ice tees fingers or whatever the fuck he did. So I would point out that you hated that movie. You remember it well though. Remember it fondly. Yeah, I sure do. I didn't see that.

That was pre-antidepressants too though. Sure, sure. Yeah. So yeah, she wakes, she's at, it's nighttime on the bus. She sees a leprechaun between the seats with his face peeled off. Yeah. And then she wakes up at his daytime on the bus.

And do you think they'll use that prosthetic a few more times? No, one time. No, they threw it away after that scene. After that one. He says something about, you've stolen my gold. Yeah, I want it to be gold. Yep, that's un-fucking-wise.

Don't steal a leprechaun's gold. You get what you get. Or do, and then put all your shoes around the room, and it'll confuse him, and he'll have to take care of it. Forgot all about that until the Crocs scene in this film. So this movie was made by a Canadian guy named Stephen Kostanski. This is our third of his movies. Shut the front door.

One we loved, and one I think you liked and I didn't. And they're very divergent. He did The Void, the Triangle movie. And he did Psycho Goreman, which we both loved. Yeah. Yeah. And I really wanted to like The Void, the Triangle movie. And he did Psycho Goreman, which we both loved. Yeah. Yeah. And I really wanted to like The Void, but it just did not pan out for me.

I don't remember anything about it, except there was a hospital and a triangle. Yeah, and like, it's like baby Hillraiser. Is it baby Hillraiser? Is it mean sex? No, it's not the mean sex part of Hillraiser. It's like just the like bringing monsters in from hell part of Hillraiser. Okay. Yeah. That's the part of Hillraiser. It's like just the like bringing monsters in from hell part of Hellraiser.

Okay. Yeah. That's the part of Hellraiser that resonates with me. Sure. Sure. Where on the other hand, I'm a real naughty sexy. Such a mean sex guy. Oh boy. After she wakes up for real on the bus, I have a note that just says, I'm in.

Like that was the opening I needed for this. Yeah, it's a door. It's a welcoming door. She gets, she opens up her phone. She gets on Funstagram. Funstagram. See that I might get tricked by. I might get tricked into posting my photos on Funstagram.

I love that she goes on Funstagram, but later in the movie, someone takes a picture of her in the buff and says, that's for Snapchat. We can reference that app. in the buff and says, that's for Snapchat. We can reference that app. Also, when she goes to search for taxi companies, she goes to Boogledy, but then later in the movie, someone's like, you can probably just Google it.

And I was like, yes, you can! Fantastic, I love this world building. Oh, good googly moogly. For this first scene that we're interacting with, this is Lila, Jennifer Aniston's daughter. Not her real daughter, her movie daughter. Yeah, doesn't look a stitch like her. No, she like, all of her facial acting is just like,

she's doing an unpleasant shit, you know? Just like, you know? Just like, ugh. You know what I mean? So not necessarily straightening, she's just not happy with what's going on. Just she knows, she's like doesn't have a bidet here, and like, you know. Just feels, she ate Chengdu last night.

Get more hyperspecific, Pittsburgh references. I think a lot of people know what I mean when I say Chengdu last night. Get more hyperspecific. Pittsburgh references. I think a lot of people know what I mean when I say Chengdu. She went and got some Oh fries. Oh, Rip. Why would you say that to me? God, do I miss getting a whole fucking bucket of french fries and a 40? Like a sitting on a wall and eating them just like.

So she died. on a wall and eating them just like, eh. Why does everything good have to die? What? I said, why does everything good have to die? So the new things can grow in their place. There's a place they're called like Viva La Taco or something. I want to, I want to burn it to the ground. Anyway, Francis from Pewee's Big Adventure shows up. Forgot he was in the first movie. Forgot he was in the first movie too.

100%. Yeah. And Missy was like, he in the first movie? And I was like, I don't think so. Doot, doot, doot, I am DB. 100% was in the first movie. Yeah. What did you say to Missy on the way up the stairs?

You know she has a good idea when you think it's yours. So what was that? Yeah. You know you have a good idea as a woman when a man thinks it's his idea. Yeah. I think Missy's right more than you think. No, you know that I think Missy is right all the time. You just can't let her know that. No, I'm not that guy. I'm not that guy.

No, Mark Buxton wasn't in the first movie. I'm a literal moron. No, it's so am I. Who cares? Has the town always been called Devil's Lake? Was it called Devil's Lake in this? I missed that entirely. You know, the university right at Devil's Lake. Yeah, this is so this movie, what this movie presupposes is that sororities can do congeneral contracting.

Uh huh. And just pop up and be the only sorority at a university. And there's only four members. Yeah. And one of them is a university. And there's only four members. Yeah. And one of them is a transfer? Yeah, you can just transfer in. You don't have to get beat in or whatever the fuck sororities

do. I mean, it seems like they're desperate for members. Yeah, after that sloth took out most of their people. Oh my god, I liked that. No, I didn't, did I? Yeah, you like sloth or house. You like sloth or house. So to my understanding then, Devil's Lake is in North Dakota?

Yes. Has it always been in North Dakota? Are there a lot of Irish in North Dakota? Yes. Okay. Of course there are. Okay. I don't know.

Have you been to North Dakota? Have I been to North Dakota? I don't think so. I think when I crossed the continent, I was in Canada at that point. Good. Yeah. Yeah. Good. Good on you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ended up as a Winnipeg middle of summer, cold as shit. Yeah. They're dummies up there. So cold. Come here. Also, this movie is so fucking Canadian. I can't stand it. I think the, the actor who has taken over for Warwick Davis is from Winnipeg.

Can only assume halfway through the movie, he just gives up on having an Irish accent. Oh, I mean, my broke is better than that. And I'm from a family of people who really hate the Irish. He gives up on the Irish accent and rhyming. Yeah. It just stops. Occasionally, he'll come back with a slant rhyme.

Yeah. And you're like, I guess. So our girl Lila is not being picked up by the sorority sister that she had planned to be picked up by. So she meets Francis and he's like, I'll give you a ride. And she's like, no. And then she calls the local taxi service and he picks up the phone. Cause it's him. He's the local taxi service. She says, I need a ride.

And he's like, we're best friends now. They are best friends now. And she's suddenly very comfortable with him once she gets inside his truck and sees all of his shamrocks everywhere. Uh huh. Yeah. She says, are you Irish or just a fan of the culture? And he says, no.

Not at all. And I thought me either. These are jokes. Nobody write to us. Please. I don't want to hear it. I cannot hear it. So the she's gonna be living at the sorority house, which is owned by the university, but apparently miles from the university. But also her mom owned it at one point. Yeah.

She inherited from her father, who was killed by the leprechaun of the first movie. And then donated it, sold it to the, what, how did the university get it, not her? That I do not know, because her mom has died of cancer at some point. Cancer and mental illness. God, every time she brings up her mom,

I want it to be dead. I was like, maybe I'll die of cancer and mental illness too. No, come on. Because you're just choked. Come with it now. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Katie and I are both drinking very caffeinated tea, so we're getting rammy.

Yeah, it actually just hit my bloodstream. Yeah. Yeah. Hey. Yeah, riding on that Russian caravan. Oh, no. So he drops her off at the house. And she meets the first of her sorority sisters.

Yes. Who I thought her name was Rose, but it turns out she's Katie. She's Katie, how could you fucking, how could you mess that up? I don't know, cause I think she said Rose first. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was like, oh, you said your name.

Of course, that's what every character does. Just comes into a movie and says, Alan. Oh, when she's dropped off, she immediately heads to the well where the leprechaun has been dumped in the solar paneled well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Also when Francis gets her suitcase out of the truck, it's like, so obviously empty. Like they did not even try. It's not even fucking try. Just a little details that matter.

Or counterpoint leprechaun returns. Yeah. Okay. All right. All right. So there's, there's a little bit of a weird interaction where Ozzy's hasn't, it didn't know her mother and has some weird feelings about something. And he says to her, everything is okay. We made sure of it. But if not, look in the basement and then peels out, which made me cackle. How did his phone get out of the pickup truck? I have no idea. He barely gets out. Yeah.

Cause he has to go back and get his phone. It's such a dumb mechanic. They could have like, they could have done anything to make him have to come back. But so this whole thing is like basically a bikini car wash, but for general contracting, there are just like hot girls doing construction. It's someone's only fans. I'm sure of it. Where do I sign up?

Yeah, I mean, truly I'll give you my money. That's hard work. We meet Rose, who is a skittish anxious little kitty cat. Yeah, who's her entire thrust as a character and in life is making sure this house is off the grid and totally sustainable within the next four weeks. It doesn't look like that's gonna happen. Does not.

Also, she doesn't make eye contact with any of the other characters, which I thought was strange. I didn't notice that. She just stares at the ground when she delivers her lines. Weird choice. The lines are written on the ground. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Katie is like her sassy friend. Yeah. And then Meredith is the drunk piece of shit friend. Yes. Lila says, who is Meredith? And Rose says, well, she's the asshole. It's like, thank you for just laying that out. And as Missy said, oh, she doesn't like to do any work,

she's a bad person. Like as a character in a movie, where she's like, oh, she's a bad person. I myself dream of labor. Oh, is that true? And I love it. I love laboring. I will shirk responsibility of the drop of a hat

till I might be a bad person. I mean, that's movie talk. Yeah. Yeah. No cell service, no internet, no power. Right. Important things. Ozzy has to go back for his phone, which

we know because he narrates it as though I were a blind person watching this movie. Do you think he's just like, I had some fucking peewees big adventure man. Yeah, I was a classic character. I was John Wayne Gacy in that one movie about John Wayne Gacy. I had a hard time watching him as that. Anytime anybody portrays John Wayne Gacy, they just become John Wayne Gacy forever. Yeah.

Take that Brian Dennehy. Brian Dennehy? Gacy forever. Yeah. Take that Brian Dennehy. Brian Dennehy. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So Meredith shows up at the house with some dudes. She likes to party and eat pizza. One of them says, hi, I'm Matt. I'm Andy's friend and I like to hang out. These lines are really good. So knowing that it's Psycho Goreman Man,

all of this makes a lot more sense. I think he was taking the piss now. Let me actually just spoil this. I enjoyed this movie way more than I had any right to. On Dopey. And it did things that I feel like I would normally find annoying, like someone would start to walk off the exit stage left, and then they'd be like, actually, no,

I should really just go do this other thing. The actual sensical thing. And I enjoyed it. I did not find it off-putting. No, and I liked that they did that twice. I thought that was very funny. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hi, I'm Matt. I am Andy's friend, and I like to hang out with women folk. Dona. Hi, I'm Matt. I am Andy's friend and I like to hang out with women folk. Donna. How many Donna will be for the Alasino? I think Tre. So Andy and Katie have some history. Andy is so Canadian. I want to flush him down a toilet. I don't know why, but that's my instinct. So Katie says like, Andy and I used to date, I'm absolutely not gonna sleep with him tonight.

And I was like, good, cause he's gross. But turns out gross, totally Katie's thing. Yeah, she is into this gross ass man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Ozzie has come back. He's looking for his phone. Finds his phone. He's got a big old paper four leaf clover.

Like a children's elementary school project. Yeah, like if the wind blew it might start spinning. Yes, yes, yes, yes. And so he is somehow, for some reason, drawn to the well. I think there's whispering or something happening. Maybe a susurrus coming from the well. A susurrus? Susurrus.

A susurrus. And when he sticks his face in the well, he is hit by the aforementioned green jello that does not stain him green at all. I thought that was very funny. Yeah, because when you start spitting it out, it's just water. I was mad.

It's like the green bottle in the Mrs. Ward movie when he breaks a green bottle and white glass God that movie is really everything. Oh man. It's perfection perfection. Did we give it a 10? We should have given it a 10 Retro rating. Yeah, I'm sure we gave it like a bag of shoes. I Feel like it's been a while since we gave things a regular normal rating So but but he is now infected with something. He's got a baby xenomorph in his tum tum. There's a great scene where he's like, he's got on overalls. So he has to unbuckle his overalls and he's lifting his shirt.

And when they show the prosthetic belly, so it's all moving. He's got these big dumpy nipples. But then when you get a shot of him just standing there, it's barely pulled up above his belt line. Yeah. And I was like, how long are your nipples, dude? They are dripping down his body. He barfs up a clover. Yeah.

Screams, no! At the sky. And then a little hand comes through his tummy, and then a second hand. And then two little booted feet and a head and the head says Papa and I was like, I'm giving this a 10. I cannot stop looking at this movie. I kind of love the actor playing a Warwick Davis playing leprechaun. Yeah. He is, um, Lyndon Porco. I think it's a porso. Um, yeah, I think he does a great job.

He does a really good job. He's very, except for his accent. Come on, take a lesson. It's hard to hold on to. I was about to try to do it and then I'm really glad I didn't really glad I didn't. Oh man. So yeah, the first set of like a fucking xenomorph. It's great. But like the little booted feet really get me. And then he's just covered in the dude's hot dogs for a real long time. We see his hot dogs in many scenes.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, I haven't noticed his Lep is full of himself. All I heard of him is Lep because I wasn't typing out Leprechaun every time. Lep in the hood come to do no good. Oh my God. How did I not like that movie? Are you sure I wasn't typing out Leprechaun every time. Lep in the Hood come to do no good. Oh my god. How did I not like that movie? Are you sure I didn't?

It was really homophobic. OK, well that makes sense. And it was bad. It was very, very bad. No, Alan. The more I think about it, the more I think I loved it. It's been like 10 years since I've seen it. That would have to have been like episode nine.

It was pretty early on. Why? But it could also, we could have seen it last week and be like, I don't know, what was it? Right now I'm trying to remember what we did last week and I don't remember what it was. Well, by the end of the podcast, you were saying. Blood and Black Lace.

Here's the thing about Blood and Black Lace. A way more important movie than this one, not as good strong disagreement. So this is the first time that the leprechaun explains to us the entire plot of his life where he's like 25 years. I've got a lot of killing to make up for. Okay. We get it. You're a murderer. Like, so I was he completely murder-based in the first movie or was that just like, I need to get my gold back and I'm going to murder until I get my gold back.

I think he was task focused. I don't think he was just, and I don't recall a like a, uh, correlation between how much gold he had and how murderous he could be. Yeah. And yeah, yeah, yeah. Not like an energy pack. Yeah. I feel, yeah. I feel like they had got studio notes on this. It was like, I just don't see the connection. So you need to say it at least every eight to 10 minutes so that the audience doesn't forget. And then we cut back to the sorority house with all of the sisters, four of them. That's all of them. And someone asks Lila about

her life and she's like super awkward and start talking to her about her mom having cancer. She admits to not ever having friends. Yeah. And then like one of the dudes is filming her. Cause he's like, that's her future bow. I why? Okay. We got to talk about that. And then she goes, and then she got cancer. Like, save your trauma for a third chat. And then Meredith makes some like off the cuff joke about her dead mom. She mom was crazy. And that shit is hereditary. It's really mean. She should have been throwing hands when that happened.

Meredith's got a drinking problem, as we're to understand. Sure, yeah. And a pizza problem, because it looked like the pizza was just cheese and broccoli and no sauce. It was gnarly. Like, I like a white pizza, but that was not right. That's not food. No.

That was like, can the prop department make a pizza real quick? They're like, we don't have anything red. Is that OK? We used it all for that man's hot dogs. They're like, we don't have anything red. Is that okay? We used it all for that man's hot dogs. Yeah. Oh man. We get a scene of Katie and Andy in the kitchen

and she's like, what? I'm just cleaning while shaking her ass around. And I thought, God, I gotta try that. That made Missy go, oh, come on. I loved it. Look, I'm not as feminist as Missy, I guess. I think you should shake your ass when you want to get fucked. What's in this tea? It's a me, Elon Musk. She does have a great ass though. Yeah. As you said, all beautiful ladies. Yeah. With these two Dilwads.

I have a question about their home. Yeah. So they're, they're working, there's like Meredith, or no, excuse me, not Meredith, Rose, is like really trying to keep them on a schedule. Turnaround time has to be really tight. They're working day and night. Yeah.

Morning and noon and evening. Yeah. Why did they spend so much time decorating? There are bead curtains everywhere. And like cutouts from Seventeen magazine. They have more shit on their walls than I do in the house I've lived in for over 10 years. Listen, if I know anything about sorority girls.

Tell me what you know about sorority girls as a 50 year old man. They always overdo it. Like say they have to go wash their titties off because they got whipped cream all over them. Let's say that happens. Let's say that happens. They're gonna have to wash their ass cracks

for like 15 minutes. They gotta get them clean. Ah man, sorority movies. Fuck, what's the one? Black Sunday? No, not Black Sunday, Black Christmas. Black Christmas? Sorority movie? Oh fuck, it doesn't matter. I can move on now. Yeah, sorority movies. They're great. We've done a bunch of sorority movies. Yeah. I'll put them all in the notes. What's that? I'll put them all in the notes. I'm like running out of things to do with that. Like, did you like this episode? Maybe you'd like these. You start just spinning a wheel. Do you like this episode? I don't know. Listen

to the last one. You fucking piece of shit. Yeah. I don't remember what it's about. Tell me, tell me what, after you're done. So, uh, as, as Katie is going to fuck Andy, uh, the leprechaun is like peeping around being a little peeper. Right. And Lila falls asleep and sees Ozzy standing over her bleeding. Ozzy is Francis and then wakes up with blood on her cheek. And then she sits up and we see that the pizza box is there and the pizza, did you see what the pizza shop name was? No. Legitimate pizza. Which is hilarious because that pizza was not legitimate.

Please God, I love it. Lyle here's running water and I was like, Oh, I hope you girls know how to dig a sump pump. She goes into the basement. Yeah. It's flooded. It's like knee deep flooded. She walks right the fuck in it and like a cami. Little shorty shorts.

They were like bloomers. Bloomers with a ruffle. Yeah. Yeah. And she goes in there and she just starts fixing pipes. And what this- It's a giant wrench. Okay. What this movie presupposes is if your mother has died of cancer and mental

health issues, you weren't able to do plumbing concrete work. I do not understand her expertise. It's very funny. Um, what this movie also presupposes is that leprechauns have gills cause his little hat pokes up out of the water. Do you think I liked that? I do. I do. Did you also like the free to use almost Jaws music? It reminded me strongly of that hurricane movie set in Florida with Barry Pepper,

where there's like a- The movie was great. What, is it an alligator? I couldn't remember if it was an alligator or a shark, and for a moment I was second guessing myself. No, it's like an alligator that moves into their home. Yeah, and just lives in the basement. Like Lyle Lyle Crocodile.

A joke I'm sure I made in that episode. I don't even remember what the name of that movie was either. I want to say Gators with a Z. I'll look up- That's for the sequel. All I remember is that it was Berry Pepper. You just have to do Berry Pepper Alligator movie. Berry Pepper Alligator movie.

Crawl. Crawl. 84% on Rotten Tomatoes. People are way too fond of Berry Pepper in this world. You think that's all bee peps? What can I say? Oh man. So she's fixing this pipe. Rose shows up and she's like, oh no, we got to fix this. And she's like, give me that fucking sump pump and that hose. I'll have this done in 15 minutes. I'm on the cancer and mental health issues. So I know what I'm doing down here.

Rose is like, please stop talking about your mom. It's making everybody really uncomfortable. This is just a really helpful free tip. And I thought, well, that was a nice way to tell her that actually. It was really nice, but also she's going through some shit. Yeah, but you just, she's trying to get this girl into the fold. You know, you got, you have to save your trauma

for a little bit later. I think she's trying to get into dead mom's club. She wants the satin jacket It's a cute jacket. I mean we look great Every time when we come to record we put on our jackets. That's why we're always swishing When our dads die are we gonna get new jackets or should we just throw like a good party? We should put our dads in a car and shove it over into the hollow like the one Louise. I bet they'd get along assholes. Yeah. I feel like in this scene I can barely watch Rose speak. Like it is excruciating to watch her speak.

Why? Because she's always looking down? She's always looking down. She's just her face is contorting in a way that faces don't often do. Well it's probably come to smell because Meredith loves to make juices out of every plant that's in there around the house, but she fills the jars with plant juice and vodka. Yeah, she's really got a problem. Which will come up later. It sure will.

Oh my God, and for no fucking reason whatsoever, ever, the leprechaun pops up out of the water and says, I love the smell of me gold in the morning. Yeah, where do you smell gold? Where do you smell gold? Why are you quoting Apocalypse Now? What's happening right now? And then he just, does he, is it me or does he then just sink back down below the water? I want to believe that he does. See you guys in a little bit. And they have a gray water system in this house because they have no plumbing.

Right. So Meredith is outside puking into their water supply and everyone's like, are you okay? Are you doing all right? As a morning puker, I water supply and everyone's like, are you okay? Are you doing all right? As a morning puker, I feel this so hard. There's a whole earth to go puke on lady, get that fucking drinking water. It's true. You always puke in the grass. That's just a tip.

I mean, listen, this is a tip from me to you as a morning puker, puke in the grass. Less splash back, doesn't contaminate the water supply. Sure. Yeah. I mean, that's just common decency She's come in puking puking decency Meredith also calls somebody an a hole in this scene literally an a hole and I thought but why why would she say a hole? Maybe because it's a sci-fi movie. They can only curse so many times

I guess they must have had a certain amount that they, yeah, they hit their limit at some point. There was a point where I was wondering if this was actually shown on the sci-fi channel or if this was their like foray into a theater film. I do not think this had a theatrical release. Because there's so much blood in this movie. There is, yeah. No, it was released, Release Premier digitally on video on demand on December 11th 2018 made its worldwide TV premiere on March 17th 2019 on sci-fi then released on DVD and blu-ray which someone has kindly mailed to you

Two months later to us. Well, I haven't got my hot little hands on it. You could take the fucker home I already watched it, Alan. Oh, Barry, you loved that enough that you're gonna watch it again. I actually did enjoy it. I was thinking we should start signing these and doing raffles for people to take them. I don't wanna sign anything.

But we can sign our name like we're the director. Oh. It's the most fun thing you've ever said. No, it's not. Martin Scorsese. There's a jump scare where Matt scares Lila and this is supposed to be their meet-cute or something. Who knows?

Oh man, and he's like, Casavetes and Rodriguez, they did it all. It's like, fuck you, man, we know movies too. And also, I kind of feel like you like one or the other. You're not like- You're not a two-fer, no.. Also he is 34 if he's a day. His hairline is making for the back of his head. And I find this distressing because Lila has is maybe

in her meant to be, I mean she's college age, but she's got like sort of chubby baby cheeks. She looks like a little kid. Yeah. I mean she looks like she's college age. I mean, yeah, they do look like babies. And he looks like her professor, which is a different movie. No. So the leprechaun tries to magic a pitchfork at her, but not enough. And he says, I've lost me knack time and a fresh killing should bring it back. To which I wrote, come on. She's talking to Matt and they're like, there's their meat. Cute is progressing, but then she sees Ozzy in the mirror and says,

what are you doing here? Yes, she was previously talking about her mom's shit again. And then he says, who are you talking to? And she says, I thought I saw the taxi guy, but dead. And it's like, in this moment, I'm thinking like, there's gonna be an arc where he falls for her and he absolutely should not because she's both insane and insufferable.

Like she's cute, but like you don't want to go near that. That is weird. You know? Yeah. Right. He could fix her. Oh, I don't think men think like that. Do they? Some do men. Do you think like that? Sometimes it didn't work out. No, it sure didn't. There was no fix in that one. So cut to this poor civil servant, the North Dakota postman. Yeah. Like a rural post, rural mail, mail carrier, which seems like a very challenging job. Sure. Sure. Reaches into their mailbox. First of all, who's mailing them shit? He gets his hand cut on the mailbox. So you think, well, no, not on the mailbox. No, no. The leprechaun is in there meowing. Like there's a cat stuck in

the mailbox. Yeah. The cats know they can't close the door behind him. And then he looks in the mailbox and the size of the leprechaun's eyes are too big for his head to fit inside the mail. So fucking good. He does this all to steal the mail truck. He pulls the mailman's head into the mailbox, which somehow gets stuck, even though it's five times the size of his head. And also the mailman's hands are free to try to pull it off. He does not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a movie of not doing things with your hands when you could absolutely do things with your hands. If he had useful feet and he was trying to get that up there,

he, the mailman falls down, Leprechaun steals his truck and then drives over the mailman's fucking head. I thought this was great. Brilliant. So Oscar worthy. And then, and then to ruin the scene, the leprechaun does like the post office credo while cleaning his boots. His shoes cannot be dirty. You know that they love shoes. Okay.

When I wrote that note, I forgot about his shoe fetish. Okay. I mean, isn't it? I think he's never jerked off to a shoe. Do leprechauns jerk it? We've talked about vampires. What about leprechauns? They seem dirty. Yeah, they just squeeze out a couple of four leaf clovers and move on.

Make a little rainbow, pot of gold at the end. Why do you think that Chicago River turns green? Holy gosh. That's all leprechaun jizz. They also have an ADR line here. I'm sorry, I just zoomed right over leprechaun juice. They also have an ADR line here. I, sorry. I just zoomed right over leprechaun juice. I didn't even let that sit. I'm sorry. Please. I'll throw it out four more times. I'll try to find a way for you to work it in.

I'll be throwing out leprechaun juice like I'm a fucking leprechaun. Perfect. Nailed it. He also, there's an ADR line here when he's walking away that says killing is the key to my health and helps me in finding my wealth, which is another just like, get it in, get it in wherever you can. That's sewn on a pillow on my couch. Killing is the key to my health and helps me in finding my wealth. Yeah, you should get that on a sampler. Fucking idiots. Oh my God. Yeah.

I haven't know this is killing is the key to my health and helps me find my God. Yeah. I haven't know. This is killing is the key to my health and helps me find my wealth. Yeah. F*****g idiots. So we see Lila having a shower as the leprechaun is like peeping around. He's such a pervert. Of course he jerks off. Yeah, of course. Uh, and her housemate takes an unsolicited nude of her to put on Snapchat, which is hilarious and not like snack chat or, you know. Snatch chat. Snatch chat. That exists. I don't want to find out. Here goes Katie to an incognito window.

Already did it. Snatch chat. Alan, this could be a real marketing opportunity for us. Oh, it's real. I have no idea what the fuck this is. Members. All I know is it is currently putting spamware all over your phone. No, it's incognito.

They can't do that. Oh, that's right. No one knows the perverted shit you're looking at. I'm registering. I don't know why. It looks like nothing was found. It seems like someone just parked on snatchchat.com. I'm gonna see if we can offer them some money for it. We'll trade you an angel fire website that we're

not using. I wonder if that's still up there. Incognito mode. Cause that will put spamware on your phone. So at this point in the film, uh, oh, we see Matt going through the footage that he shot with his drone and Lila is somehow impressed by it. I was befuddled. Yes, ma'am. I just Googled werewolfambulance angel fire. And the first thing that came up was a Lyco search.

It's still there. We did it. We did it. We did it. werewolfambulance.angelfire.com. That's funny actually. That's like a first few episodes joke. Yeah, it sure is.

So earlier when we saw Lila going to bed when she had the dream about Ozzy being dead and then woke up with blood on her face. Yes. It only has 1113 views. Most of them are us. Probably. That's a real bummer. All right, go on.

What did you want it to have? I wanted it to get some fucking traffic, Alan. I need to monetize this shit. If you're going to get malware, go to werewolfambulanceandagelfire.com to get your malware. Do it in an incognito window. Nobody can get you there. So earlier when we saw her going to bed in her bloomers, she moved a panda bear that is roughly the size of me. Yeah, which is crazy. We didn't see her have that on the Greyhound. She moved that, no, that came with the house. She moved that to between her and the bed where she had to climb over it to get in bed.

And that should have been a key to everyone else in the house that this woman is out of her fucking mind. I feel like they're so desperate for help or companionship that they don't care. But yeah, she's not bar. So she comes to her room now and the Panda is in the bed. Yeah. Except it's not the Panda because under her bed is the rest of the Panda and it's just the head. Just the head. It's the leprechaun. He's wearing the head. He's wearing the Panda. He loves a jape. He and a joke and a yeah. And she hits him. They're fighting and he licks her ankle and

basically says she tastes like her mother. Oh God. That's gross. She goes, you're the thing my mom always said was real. She wasn't crazy. It's like, you've gone crazy for nothing. He also said something about this piece of gold taken from my friend's bowels. Did he take it from? He took it from Ozzie's tum tum. Okay. Did he? How do you, you can't just keep something in your bowels forever. Well, if you chew chewing gum, this is so not true. This is so not true.

I love bringing up because you have such a, I get really fucking defensive about it because I've swallowed so much gum in my life. I can't chew it without swallowing it. It's so unsatisfying. If I spit it out, I feel like I've been robbed. It's the edging of food. It's the edging of food and I don't like to edge. I like to swallow my food. Listen, I just like the leprechaun jizz and get out of this situation. Perfect. Nailed it.

So the lights go out and he says, I saw your boobs in the shower. Yes. There's no rhyme. He goes, boobs of oodles of talent. What? He also grabs her necklace and it burns him. Yeah. Cause it's fool's gold, which is a thing I've never heard anyone making jewelry out of.

No, I didn't think you could. No, no. They have a really long conversation and this is also kind of lightly the doll problem that I always have in movies where it's like, you can just pick up a doll and toss it, you know? Sure. Yeah. It's the, it's the Chucky issue. Yeah. Yeah. But I like, I love doll movies. So here I am. Remember that Stuart Gordon movie, dolls? Yeah. I liked it. It was really fun. Yeah. I think I liked it. Dysfunctional relationships all around. Yeah. Oh, they were so mean to that little girl. Guys write in if I didn't like it. So, uh, Matt has night vision on his,

on his camera, so he's looking around. And he's also explaining his art to people, which I find to be obnoxious. Sure, yeah, Matt sucks. No good dudes in this movie, except for the one who is a good dude who gets killed in the first scene.

So Ozzy. Oh, oh, sure. Yeah, yeah. I believe he was also a red herring in the first movie. I think he was as well, yeah. But then Matt sees the leprechaun and he gets attacked by him while Katie is fixing fuses

to get the lights back on the house. And Lila is excited because Matt has seen the leprechaun and she's not crazy. Yeah. So, yeah. Is this where, oh, he says, she says to him, you're disgusting. And he goes, but in a sexy way, right?

Oh, well, Katie. The leprechaun says that. Oh, I thought it was Katie to Andy. Oh, I thought it was the leprechaun. Yeah, it might be the leprechaun. Now I'm not sure. My notes are unclear. Because at this point in time,

Katie's going to fix the fuses and Andy does a jump scare at her, which causes going to fix the fuses and Andy does a jump scare at her, which causes her to drop the fuses. But then she's like, you know what? You can finger me while we're out here. Yeah. He's not even cute. And she's like a stunner. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's an absolute smoke show. Like just, I just find it, it makes me mad when a movie expects me to believe that like that man is irresistible. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a real, a real Tom Atkins for you. Yeah. Yeah. It is a real Tom Atkins for me,

but at least Tom Atkins is full of charm. Sure. Yeah. He got Riz for days. Riz for days. Riz for days. I like that while this is happening while they're just like about to fuck outside, Meredith is just looking through the window. Yeah. That was very funny. Drinking because she's always drinking. The leprechaun gives her a little poem about a golden shower. I don't know.

Like he gets raunchier as the film goes on. I can make it linger if you smell my finger. I can put two in the pink and one in the stink. I'm the leprechaun. No rhymes, just explaining things. No rhymes? Pink and stink? Oh, okay, I'm sorry, it was internal, I got you,

I'm sorry, forgive me. I don't know how rhymes work. I feel slighted. He says to her, I got a glad eye for a fellow toss pot. Yeah. Is a toss pot a drunk? Yeah. Cool.

Am I a toss pot? I don't think so. I'm a bit of a toss pot. No, come on now. I haven't had a drink in like two hours. Three. She also has a wrap in her hair, like she went to Jamaica. Oh, the little like thread lock

Well, we've got to know that you're in college so we're gonna stick this in your hair She's playing music on her phone and takes a picture of the two of them and he says a camera and a Walkman and she goes What's a Walkman? This bitch would know what a Walkman is, right? College kids know what a Walkman is, don't they? I don't know. It's the 90s again. Look at the size of these jeans that I'm wearing.

They're massive. I'm still holding on to skinny jeans, tooth and nail. Live your fucking life. Wear what you want to wear. That's all I'm saying. I just want to wear big jeans. Yeah, you look great in them. Tired of having to butter my legs to put pants on, you know?

Me on the other hand, I'm real into beef tallow now. Oh, slather it. What a vegetarian you are. Slather, well yeah, I don't eat it. Oh yeah, just wear it. Just wear it. Sure. So post-coitus, Andy puts a condom in the compost.

So shitty. Yeah, he sucks. And he's being so Canadian right here. And this is like the first scene where we see the leprechaun interacting with him and now the leprechaun gets really Canadian. Like he couldn't hold on to it anymore. They have a brawl. It's the leprechaun lifts Andy above his head and it's fucking hilarious.

It really is. It really is. Oh, and he throws Andy at the gang. And then he also like compost bins him into the wall, like gets it to roll at him. Because Andy throws the compost bin at him and he jumps on it like it's a log in a river just starts rolling it and then kicks it. So good. It's very funny. Earlier in the movie, we'd seen him incorrectly

installing a solar panel, but insisting that he was right. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. But here's where it'll pay off. Yeah. It bisects him. It bisects him. Extremely Matthew Lillard in 13 Ghosts, a film I am now constantly thinking about.

I love that the bisecting of Andy will come back later in this movie in such a fucking funny way. I am excited for this. Yeah. Yeah. Um, so he's cut in half. He fully like, and I love the way he peels away from each side of it. I thought they were going to CGI it. They did not delightful. Yeah, they actually cut this man in half. Yeah. It's so sad. Yeah. I mean, he was not a good dude. The movie knew it. They took a chance and they murdered him on set. Yeah.

No one will see. It's like it's a true snuff film. Yeah, man. Yeah. We watch the snuff film, everybody. So did all of you, presumably. And then they put it on cable. And further, for the person who thinks

we are the decline of Western civilization, my note after he gets cut in half by this holder panel, that's fun. It's our fault. America's our fault. Rose is hiding in a closet. And he, the leprechaun rolls in and pulls his face off again, just for funsies. He rolls his head in and then jumps out of his own hat like a rabbit. I like that.

Yeah, it was fun. And then pulls his own face off. Which I can't be mad at. We've seen it before, but I'll see it again. And then she stabs him with a heel. Yes. And then puts all the shoes all over, like kicks all these shoes all over the floor and he's just like, Oh no. It has to put them right. But then he has to throw away the Crocs. Why did they bring so many high heels to live in a rural area outside of

Bismarck, North Dakota? Katie, let me tell you what I know about sorority girls. When they get a whipped cream all over their boobs. All right. All right. The others are arguing about whether or not he's a cannibal and Katie says he seems a little too refined.

He wears that freaking jaunty hat. I thought I'm with you. I really liked Katie. I did too. And in this scene, they're like, we can figure this out. We're a bunch of smart women and Matt. Oh my God. So they're going to, they're going to get the keys. Yeah. They have to go back for the keys to Meredith's Prius. Right. And, uh, Rose doesn't want to leave the house as if like it will cease to exist if she's no longer in it. Right. Because she has so much,

she's got so much to do and it's a little time. She's, she's ridiculous. Yeah. And Meredith is going, she's like running around with Lila and she's like, I think the thing we're looking for is in the basement. You were friends, go down to the basement. And Missy said at this point, she's not her friend. No, she locks her in there because she's awful. Because she's in Caput's with the fucking leprechaun. She made a deal. I know. When they all get out to the car, someone's like, where's Lila? And she's in Caput's with the fucking leprechaun. She made a deal. I know. When they all get out to the car, someone's like, where's Lila?

And she's like, she didn't make it. She's dead. He killed her. To which I wrote, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha She's piss drunk. She at one point says, I'm sorry, I can't drive. I'm very drunk, but keeps driving. And they can't figure out their way back to the house, even though the road they had come in on was wide enough for a drunk college kid in a Prius to drive through. All right.

100%. Yeah. Oh man. So the leprechaun's in the car with him. He just pops up in the back seat between Katie and Matt. Yeah. Yeah. And he gets pushed into deer poop. Yeah.

Which he doesn't really comment on. No, it's also green. He's happy. Okay. Here I have written, Oh, nice. Fulci maggot barf touch. What does that mean? Oh, so we see Ozzy again in the basement and he's corporeal now. Right. And he's for some reason has a bunch of mealworms dropping off rather than maggots. Yeah, that's I mean, you can get them at a feed store. You don't get maggots at a feed store. Listen, I'm going to clean all those up and feed my chameleon when we're done. She's like, you're dead, huh? And he's like, he nods yes. She was like, well, anyway, it's like, maybe express your condolences. Are you a zombie? No. Are you a ghost? I don't

know. She gives him some saran wrap to wrap his hot dogs back in. And he doesn't. She asks him, is the leprechaun how you know my mom? And I thought, what a fucking sentence. And then Ozzy does this whole long charade bit, which infuriated me because my kid has been doing the charade thing lately too. And I'm like, I don't know, I'm asking you what you want for breakfast, dude. Like I you're fucking signing waffle. I don't know. I don't know. It's interesting. You bring Lucy up cause I'm looking forward to the day that she says is the

leprechaun, how you know my mom, what would you say? Yeah, so he's gold is in a box in the basement right next to where Lila is, fortunately. Very funny. But it's not. It's a map of his gold. Yeah. And it's not in a box. It's in behind a brick in the wall.

And she, I don't even know how it comes to this, but she says he's like an awful David Blaine or just David Blaine. And I was like, does Sci-Fi Network have beef with David Blaine? Because he's definitely done like a does Syfy network have beef with David Blaine? Cause he's definitely done like a special on their network, you know? Listen, doesn't everybody have beef with David Blaine? I mean, it's just wild. I felt like it was wild.

Like he didn't pay his bills or something. Do you have any notes? Yeah. Get a fucking Blaine dig in there and then we're moving on. Blaine! Maybe he was supposed to play the leprechaun. Too tall. What they could do with forced perspective these days. Yeah. John Rhys Davies is like over six foot and he played a fucking dwarf in

the Lord of the Rings movies. If you say so. Sorry, I just zoned out. Were you telling me a fact? We're back in the woods now. Yeah. And the leprechaun is flying himself on a drone. I like this quite a bit. Flies up next to them and gives them a little middle finger.

Yeah. Yeah. He's good. Meredith drives into a tree with not all that much force, but the car's not damaged at all. So I guess that's a good ad for the all new Toyota Prius. Brought to you by the Sci-Fi gentle and Toyota Prius. Toyota Prius, I don't know, hit a tree.

Who gives a shit? Hit it environmentally friendly. Are you drunk? Go hit a tree. And have a little man say to you, looks like you've hit a dead end. My friend. A few more kills should do the trick. Look at this leprechaun just come out of my dick. He pulls out Ozzy's eye

and then puts it in his own eye socket. Because while he was on the drone, he was giving them the finger and then didn't notice that there was a tree in front of him, hit a tree that went through his head and knocked his own eye out. So you got a new one. He had a new eye from Ozzy. Yes. And the, the kids, the,

our, our, our college kids find Ozzy's body and they have to dig around his body for his keys. Right. Because they're like, Katie, go find it. She's like, man, just me then I guess. Uh, Meredith has admitted that admitted that she set up Lila and Lila is not dead, so they have to go back for Lila. Yeah, made a deal with him. Yeah. She runs super funny.

Meredith? Yeah. She's drunk. Yeah. She runs like Keanu Reeves, but she's drunk. Sometimes when I'm walking home drunk from somewhere, I'll run because it just feels so good. I wonder if I look like that.

You're like my little gazelle friend. I just got to, I just want, I mean, you get there so much faster. So I just had this like image of myself running up the alleyway to my house. I should not be doing this. I also like to cut to the footage of you thinking that you're running and it's just like your

arms are going real fast, but you're still walking. Bouncing off the walls of nearby houses. Oh, yeah. So a hose kind of stops her. The sprinkler goes off. Yeah. The sprinkler goes off and I was like, okay, just keep moving lady. What are you doing?

What a hose really stop you? Well, it stops her when the sprinkler head start firing off and hitting her. This is very good. And then one sticks in her mouth and starts sprinkling her fucking blood everywhere. And the leprechaun says, now she's one with nature. Ashes to ashes, blood and guts.

Bro, you're rhyming that, not really rhyming with what it's meant to be. Not with what you're saying. None of this makes sense. Look at me bust me four leaf clover nuts. Um, Apricot is other girls here, Meredith screaming and one says, do you think she's okay? And the other one goes, uh, no, which is funny. And there, and then Matt is with them and he's like, maybe I can slow them down. I've had a good life. I'm 46. So he stays behind dicking around with his drone to see if he can see the leprechaun. So dumb. But then the leprechaun takes over his drone. But first, um, Rose says,

Warner Herzcock would be so proud. Actually, that was very funny. Didn't even notice that she mispronounces me. Cause even when they're walking away and then the other one says, who's Warner Hertzcock? And the one who said it was like, how the hell should I know? I just noticed cause he made a face and he's like, probably not. Um, yeah. So then there's a, uh, Oh, Lila while this is happening, Lila is getting herself out of the basement by breaking out a window. Yeah. She does like a, she finds a hammer and she's like, should he use that in the first one? Okay. I like that. I think it's cute. And there's a bunny jump scare when

she gets out of the window. Yeah. It's cute. And there's a bunny jump scare when she gets out of the window, which is funny. Lights, camera, decapitation. Cause it's not even close. The leprechaun takes over the drone. That just made me think of a, on a suicide tendencies record, he opens it by saying lights, camera, suicidal. And that it doesn't work.

It doesn't follow. It's stupid. Notoriously stupid man. Oh yeah. So he, the leprechaun takes over the drone and then is flying it at Matt's head and in order for Matt to die, which he does and he gets decaffeinated,

what for that to happen, he has to stay perfectly still. Had he moved at all, he would be fine. All he had to do was duck. Yeah. Are drones that sharp? I feel like everyone's cousin-in-law has one. I don't know.

I've never touched a drone. I don't think so. They can be. Too many idiots have them. Are you a drone person? Get in touch. Are they sharp? Just because you have a drone doesn't make you an idiot.

It's true. But if you're an idiot, you probably have a drone That vapes some Loaded that drone with pink cotton it's coming back down here. God I saw so many more notes Suddenly she's become disappointed in the film for not being Following the treasure map and they're like could that be a marker? There's like a 52 Chevy pickup parked over there. Yeah. That seems like a big enough marker in the pickup is the gold where it's been sitting for 25 years untouched. No, not untouched. Rose scooped some of it and somehow cashed it in for currency for American

dollars to spend in the American state of North Dakota. She does say that she took it to Bismarck where she got to a cash for gold place that gave her money. I mean, she bought solar panels. That gold must've been valuable. Solar panels are pricey. Yeah, they're not cheap. Yeah.

You got to get that government discount for them. That probably doesn't exist anymore. There's something here about fool's gold and iron pyrite and four leaf clovers. I don't know. So her necklace is fool's gold. So now they have to like do a thing with a thing with fool's gold to trap him. Okay. And then, uh, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. So they shove a bunch of tampons under the gold to make it look like it's full. I like that. Yeah. What do we have a lot of to fill up this thing? Well, we're in a house of four women. There's a lot of tampons.

Tampons. And she says to him, I guess it's your time of the month. Yeah, very funny. Did you think that was funny? I was like, come on, a man 100% wrote that. Maybe that's why I thought it was a good joke for men. Good joke for boys. Boys like jokes.

We're not afraid of tampons. We'll make jokes. But this is all like a setup so that the other two can hit them with pillows? Or something in pillowcases, but mostly pillows. Well, they did say that there's a clover patch out in back of the house that, they said this is the very beginning of the movie, that Meredith has been making her green juice out of. Oh, right. So I'm assuming they filled the pillowcases with clover though that is not mentioned.

It would take forever. It would take forever. But they're beating him with the pillows and she puts the fool's gold medallion over his neck and traps it. Yeah. And he's stuck. Right. And he's stuck. Right. Somehow they find Matt's head, though it happened in the woods, why are we finding it now? Oh, they run out of the house maybe? I don't know because this is where I was like,

are they clipping this from an episode of Friends? Because it's Jennifer Aniston's voice, and then it's very clearly a Canadian Jennifer Aniston. Set me free and you can have your mom back. Yeah. And I thought, she sounds like she was kind of a lot of work. Yeah. Yeah. Your I thought she sounds like she was kind of a lot of work. Yeah. Yeah.

Mom was a lot. You know, the friends theme. Oh, can I tell you a secret? I've never seen an episode of friends in my life. Why would you? Yeah. I've seen some, do not like, not my thing. Can I tell you a secret? Yeah. I feel the same way about Seinfeld. I like Seinfeld. I've seen some, do not like, not my thing. Can I tell you a secret? Yeah.

I feel the same way about Seinfeld. I like Seinfeld. I know you do. Got some good gags. Not a big sitcom guy. No. Although I was watching Abbott Elementary before you came over here.

Yeah, you cried at that one with Kristen Bell. The Good Place, come on, so good. It's a sitcom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's not like a friends kind So good. That's a sitcom. Yeah. Yeah. But it's not like a friend's kind of sitcom. What's the difference? Is on network TV on a weekday night. I don't know what the difference is. I'm asking as a person who's never seen either one. Jesus.

I'm too good. So fucking defensive. Um, She says, I wish you'd just die already and like puts a tube in his mouth. Why not pull the tube out with your hands little buddy? He can't do it. Hands don't work in this movie as we know. Hands can't stop anything. Hands don't do. You could have grabbed the drone

that was gonna cut your head off, Matt. Yes, and this is, they're going to dump the clover juice that I get, I think that's what it was that's going to go into it. I think so. Yeah, yeah, they're making a clover juice sprayer to stick it in his mouth. Yeah, and he swells and explodes.

And earlier in the movie, he said, a leprechaun can come back if you don't destroy every bit of him. Right, so two of them leave Rose to clean it up. I am also now realizing how many more notes I have in the movie. Not the fuck over already. It's not the fuck over already, but the funniest joke in the fucking movies coming up, which is, uh, when he becomes little guy, when he coalesces into many tiny leprechauns, many tiny leprechauns,

and he is... Coagulates, coalesce, coalesce, no, that's convalesce. What's coalesce mean? Coalesce means to come together. Okay, good, all right, all right. Fuckin' brain genius over here. So he attacks her with a hammer

as one of the little guys and says, stop, hammer time, and then starts doing the dance in 2018. I think it's because he's old. He's talking about a Walkman before. I think it's because, yeah. His cultural references are way off. Yeah. He's been out for 25 years. She bites him open. She does bite him open. And then trips and lands head first on her golden shovel. Is this after she has confessed to like sending nudes to a guy

to get a bunch of money? $20 just to make this project work. We never understand why Rose is so motivated to get this project off the ground. Nope. Okay. And then she's dead and you're like, well, I guess we'll never know. We'll never know. He trips her and she falls on the award that she won that is like a little like gardening shovel. A trowel. Yeah. And it goes right through her head.

And it's very funny. And then. But also why did Rose have to die? She's a hard worker. Hard workers should live. And then he rebuilds himself by all of the little ones like stacking on top of each other to like slowly build his legs back up. I enjoyed this very much until he said, looks like I really pulled it together.

No one loves a quippy man. So she says that he needs to be more fiscally responsible and that, or he says that to her or something. And then he, she, no, she says it to him. Then he goes, you need to liquidate. And I was like, Oh, do a capital gains pun next. to her or something and then he's she no she says it to him then he goes you need to liquidate and i was like oh do a capital gains pun next Roth IRA tax-free growth forever here i question whether or not gold was a conductor of electricity of course it is it's a metal what's wrong with me i don't know you. You're fine. No, I'm not.

No, I take away that brain genius thing. But anyway, they doused everything in the house and kerosene. So none of it matters. Yeah. And light them on fire with electrocution. The house catches on fire. He's doing a fire walk and laughing and saying, and they say there's no global warming, which makes no fucking sense. No fucking sense. It makes no fucking sense. So good. No. And she says to him, Edith.

Wait, no, no, wait. First, first they go down to, she and Katie and Lila go down to the basement so they can go out the window that she punched earlier. And he slides like tummy side down the stairs. On the door. So funny. It's just a little like, why? Right. And she says, I've got a limerick for you. Eat a dick ass baggins.

Not a limerick, not even really a joke. No, but I'm just like ass baggins. Yeah. And the house it turns out was not made of kerosene but dynamite. She should have gone with dildo baggins. It just would have been better. Dildo baggins is a funny joke.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I remember being in New York years ago and seeing a flyer for a show that was happening at a bar somewhere called Lord of the Cock rings, starring dildo baggins. Very good. Yeah. So very, very good. Yeah. Katie says I punctured punctured my trapezius. They all get covered in green goo from the sky. Yeah. Yeah. Who the fuck is this university guy and why is he showing up in a 1994 Chevy

Corsica branded with the university's name on it? Looking like a team who Tom Scarrett. What is he doing there? I don't know. He sucks. I just haven't noticed the university shows up. He is the representative of the university. Why would he come in the middle of the night? Because there's a big explosion and fire at a university.

It has just happened. Yeah. He didn't come when the power went out. No. It doesn't seem like they've had much oversight. And if they had, this would be a very different project. Like, where is their advisor going? So this is when they go to walk into the woods

after they say something to him. And then Katie goes, actually, I've lost a lot of blood and could use a ride. Yeah, yeah. Then we see it's daylight. The leprechaun is holding a Bismarck or bust sign. Would you let this guy ride with your chickens? Absolutely not.

No, no, no, no, no. He gets in a chicken truck, riding on the back of a chicken truck. Can I read you my last note? Yeah. Subtle. Katie. Alan. I'm sorry. I was talking to Katie in the movie. Oh, sorry. All right. Katie in the room with me. Yes. Can you give me a rating? Do you remember what I gave Blood and Black Lace? Because this is one and a half better than Blood and Black Lace.

Oh my god, I think you gave it a six. Seven and a half. Seven and a half, wow. This movie was way more fun than it had any right to be. Sure. I genuinely enjoyed it and would watch it again. And this is why we're going to become a strictly sci-fi original podcast. I know, what else do they have?

Sharktopus. Oh no, that kind of shit. Sharknado. Is there one where a shark is an investigator? Sharkstigator. Card shark, but like for real, it's a shark. Made of cards. I'm going to give this ignoring all the other sequels. Yeah, that's a great rating. It was very fun.

You could do way worse. Thank you. Occasional vagina user. I mean, I'm glad we could give this to occasional vagina user. Okay, yogurt go or whatever. Yogurt go. His hilarious japs on running machine or treadmills. The band, okay, go. They like came to prominence because they did this really

elaborate dance routine. I feel like I made me watch that really recently, like in the middle of the night. Get you up. Knock, knock, knock. Come on, we gotta watch this. Fuck. Hi, this is my Australian accent.

Yeah, pie really is gravelly. Oh man, that was a movie. We should listen to the fans more often. They know more than us. It's true, it's true, it's true. We should do this again next week. Are we reading an email? Are we? Oh, yeah. Let's hear from the fans on an email. Yeah, I love it. Okay.

Hey guys. Hi. I started following you guys around Christmas. This past Christmas? I think so. Oh, buckle up, baby. And I just wanted to say thank you. You guys have lifted my spirits a lot so. Oh buckle up baby. I just wanted to say thank you. You guys have lifted my spirits a lot lately. Oh. I appreciate your humor and your constant words of kindness. You guys have also helped me discover a love for punk music.

Oh fuck yeah. And I would like to suggest the movie Summer of 84. Keep being you and making the world better. Sincerely, Austin. Jesus, that's nice as fuck, Austin. Yeah. Summer of 84, I've never heard of it. You know it? I do know it and I have seen it. That's the summer after I was born.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So we might call it the summer of Katie. No, this summer is gonna be the summer of Katie. Yeah, it is. Hell yeah. Oh, thank you so much. Um, there are so many episodes to listen to. You've got so much, but like seriously just starting like 2020 when I got in on the antidepressants, those were six years or trash. I'm sure they're

fine. I'm sure they're fine. But I was really judgy. I can't fresh out of fucks to give these days. Oh man. Thank you, Austin. Thank you for writing in. That means a lot to us. Yeah, that's very sweet of you. But we're not gonna do Summer of 84 next. No, cause I only just heard of it right this moment.

We picked a movie earlier because we're professionals and we know what we're doing when we come in this room. Well, we know what we do and what we're doing after we sit down and one of us looks at the other and says, what do you wanna do next week? Katie, don't let them see behind the curtain. It's behind the curtain. Let's do another movie next week.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, starring one of our favorites. What is her name? Hold on one second. Laura Linney, Laura Linney's Titties, Michael Monroe, Judy Greer. Downtown Judy Jolie Brown. Katherine Newton. I don't know who that is.

She was in Friday, or Freaky, Freaky. The Freaky Friday movie. I don't know who she is, she's not one of my favorites. I thought you were gonna say Katherine Isabel. I do like Katherine, she's in Paranormal Activity Four, not sure if we did that one or not. Unclear. She's an actor who has, for like a good stretch of time,

if a family needed a kind of troubled teen daughter, she played that. Even so much that she was in episodes of Supernatural, playing that character. Well, what movie are we doing? We're doing Lisa Frankenstein. I'm excited. From 2024.

A newish. A newish. A newish film. I think that's this year. Let's go with that. Let's go with it. Still being 2024. Things are better. It's better there. It's better there. Remember when 2024 was awful and now we're looking back like, ah, the Halsey Hyundai. When my child would have a department of education. Brad. Let's not do it. I'm not doing it. I'm not fucking doing it. Katie. Alan. No, I don't want to talk to you. I'm talking to these people. People come back

next week. We're doing Lisa Frankenstein. Go buy t-shirts on T public. Become a Patron if you want to go become a Patron and go to Patreon. Uh, get at us on the discord or email if you want to get at us. Or the subreddit. We check that a lot too. And Katie's got the login for blue ski. So check her out on blue ski oh yeah you sent it to me when I was drinking and I forgot that you sent it to me I'm gonna get in there all around and thanks for listening to another episode of werewolf ambulance bye bye Many acts aint not dead pools, so many sightings at the pool No way to wake Finland's cube on film reviews

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