Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 549- 28 Years Later

Episode Date: March 2, 2026

And this week's episode, we are discussing the third installation in this series, the 2025 zombie film 28 weeks later. Special topics for your consideration include; rite of passage for children, zombie body shaming, the inexplicable will to live, mom problems, and some really good gore. We have covered the first two movies in the series and hey look! We did them in order. They are Episode 101 and Episode 553 respectively. The regular lineup of links! You can support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and listen to a ton of action movie episodes omcludonf this month's episode "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective," and bonus, our third podcast, "Nice One, Mate!" Episode 4 drops soon! Get in now to vote for our next movie. leave us a message at 412-407-7025 hang out with some cool listeners at https://discord.gg/DutFjx3cBD buy merch at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance the best place to reach us is at [e-mail] we're on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance sorta on Twitter @werebulance sorta on Instagram @werewolfambulance www.werewolfambulance.com if you feel you really must lodge a complaint with us, please do it on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance because we are probably not gonna see that, ever. If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously, we have the best listeners, hands down.

This is the worst episode of Line of Duty. No cops in this one. No cops in this one. No cops. 28 years. Oh, hey, everybody. Hi, guys. We're back.

Hey, real quick, real, real, real quick. We got to take next week off because I'm moving and I just cannot fit it in. It's tax season and I'm moving. It's hard enough. We're going to take a week off. Don't get salty. Don't get worried. I'll be back the next week.

Yeah, maybe we'll put out a little line of duty episodes so you guys can get for them like. one man. Yes, let's put out Line of Duty series one episode one. Nice one mate. Yeah. Smart. That's why you're the brains of this operation. God, I hope that's not true. I'm obviously the looks of this operation. No, you're the comedy guy. I'm the sidekick. We decided. That's what we decided on cam. They agreed. So, yeah, we're going to be off next week. You'll get a, Check out Nice One, mate. You're going to love it.

Even if you haven't watched Line of Duty. Just give it a listen. Spoilers about. If you listen to Nice One Mate, it's like in The Lost Boys when he says if you have a TV guide, you don't need a TV. If you listen to Nice One Mate, you don't need to watch Line of Duty. Exactly. Perfect. And also, those are my Oreos, and that's my Rup here.

Yeah. So, but this week, we're on. We're on. We're here to talk about a little movie. 28 years later. Third movie and a series of films. films. 28 years later.

Danny Boyle's back, baby. Did he make the second one? No. What did he make? The first one. The first one was Danny Boyle. I have to say, this series does not stick in my mind. Even the first one?

I've seen the first one several times. I've always enjoyed it. But when I think back to it, I just think of Killian Murphy and maybe like pink pajamas and I can't think of anything else that happens. Maybe. Is he not wearing pink pajamas? I don't think so. I don't know then.

Maybe that's just a fantasy. I have occasionally. The first one like rocked my world. Really? I thought it was bananas, how good that movie was. Yeah. And just had like an emotional weight to it

and none of the other ones have had. That second one I remember, see, we did that one like a couple months ago, didn't we? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember being trash, but I can't think of a single thing that happened in it. No, other than Putes.

Putes is in it. Yeah, she's the young girl. She's the girl. Yeah, I already forgot. Like, it does not stick. I watched this movie today. I watch some of it. of it on my drive here from work because I have to take 28 and there's always traffic.

I'm really struggling. I love these reveals so much. Go listen to our Patreon episode to learn what I just revealed about Ace Ventura Pet Detective. I am currently watching 28 years later. I watched it in my car at 1.5 speed and I did not wreck. I came straight from the office. I was watching it at the office, but I was doing taxes at the same time.

It's been a hard day. It's been a long day. Hey, they're going to get what they get and they won't throw a fit. That you get what you get and you don't throw a fet. Because those things rhyme in Pittsburgh. I know they do. What is it that you say? Oh.

I thought you gave me like the what, what it's actually supposed to be. You get what you get. And you don't throw a fit? No, no. And you shut the fuck. I was going to say you get what you get and you don't whine a bet. That's the same problem. You get what you get or you get a,

fucking backhand. I was doing... I had watched 28 years later. Missy was out of town. I was like, you know what? I'm going to treat myself to a horror movie. I haven't watched a horror movie non-podcast a while. I'm going to watch 28 years later.

And within the first five minutes of this movie, I almost bounced the fuck off of it. Yeah, I'm with you. There was a thing that happens. Yeah. That we're going to get to very shortly that I went. Come with it now. Tell me.

So we start off with a... My first one is, will I get mad again? We start off with some kids watching Teletavis. And I was like, you know what? I fucking love the telotubbies. Teletubbies missed me entirely. Sure. Yeah.

Yeah, I used to have a drawstring po. Wasn't Poe supposed to be the gay one according to Jerry Falwell? No, that was tinky winky winky. Tinky obvious. What the fuck am I thinking? What? It was Jerry Falwell, right? It was one of them.

Oh, fucking hell. Who didn't even know. Who cares? Some dead homophobe. Yeah, some sexually repressed piece of shit was like, that's gay. That one puts its dick in the other one's butts. So what the fuck do you care?

Yeah, let them have fun. Tinky. Jealous much? Seriously. Just British. You don't get it. So we're watching the telitubbies with a bunch of kids sitting in a room and it's very tense. Everything's very tense.

And some woman keeps coming in and dropping more kids and saying, shut the fuck up and stay here, you piece of a shit. Yeah, I thought it was a cult. Yeah, yeah. So we're in the Scottish Highlands. The text tells us on the screen. And there's muffled banging. You can hear people yelling.

outside the room, and then a bunch of rage folks, infected folks, like bust into the room. Yeah. And it becomes chaos. Chias. And this lady says, run, Jimmy, run. So Jimmy takes off running. He runs to his dad. He runs to his dad.

He runs to his dad, who's the minister, vicar? I'm going to go vicar. I've watched enough Britbox to think it's a vicar. He's a real Grantchester, if you ask me. He is New Shetland's brother. He's wearing that same blue sweater. Get that, man. Another sweater.

I know you take a vow of poverty or whatever, but come on. Also, I thought the new season was great. Did you? Yeah, did you not like it? I thought it was a little iffy. When Sandy is the best character, it's not doing great, in my opinion. Fair. He's just most improved.

I think he's most improved. It's become a different show than it was with Jimmy Perez. Yeah, for sure. Jimmy Perez, because they are from Scotland. So he runs to his dad. and his dad's in the church and his dad's like, hey man, it's judgment day, dog. Yeah.

And so the kid hides underneath his father in this great and his father gets turned into an infected man. And the kid says to his father, Father, why have you forsaken me? And I went, that is the most lazy, bullshit writing that you could fucking put in a movie. Is it God or is it his dad? I'm so angry right now.

Yeah. I mean, I think so. Somebody wrote it and was like, I'm 14 and this is deep, you know? Yeah. And the guy who wrote this movie writes good movies. Sure. If I'm not mistaken, hold on, I got to, I'm sorry to postpone spaghetti, but I got to do it quick. No, you're fine.

Alex Garland. Alex Garland, I think, wrote like Cabin in the Woods? No. That movie's so funny. Uh, no, I am completely wrong. He's written nothing that I've liked. Oh, wait. No, he's written nothing that I've liked except 28 days later.

Oh, he wrote Dread. He wrote Dredd. You liked that. I did like Dredd. With Carl Urban as Judge Dredd. He wrote 28 days later. Uh-huh. And he wrote Dredd.

He wrote Sunshine. He wrote... What's sunshine? You know what? Actually, I don't care. Danny Boyle... I just clicked on it saw Rose Byrne was in it and clicked right away. You know, I can't stand that lady.

He's also directed some movies that I like. like Annihilation. You liked that when we did that with Perry? Oh yeah, I guess I did like that. He wrote and directed it, yeah. So he writes good stuff. But someone else wrote that novel. Okay, go on.

I'm sorry. But just having a kid say, Father, why have you forsaken me? Yeah, it's bull. You're not system of a down. And also the system of a down story where I just randomly grabbed a book off a shelf and opened it to a page and that's what was in there.

You're fucking lying to me right now, system of a down. Well, that's a pretty famous line, right? From the Bible world. Yeah, you probably. that one going into that book. Yeah. Come on. So yeah, I fucking hated that. Yeah, no good.

So then we, we, we, oh, God. So now we find out that Britain's been quarantined. The mainland. Right. So now we're 28 years later. It's just, this was at the beginning, the Jimmy was at the beginning of the rage virus and now we have jumped ahead 28 years.

I just feel like it would have, they would have it. sorted in three decades. It's kind of funny because... Like all or nothing at that point, right? Yeah. Yeah, like they would have nuked it by now. Yes. The end of 28 days later is this like,

we see the plane going overhead and that's like, oh, the world is still out there. We're going to get saved. Things are going to be okay. What happens at the end of 28 weeks later? Oof. Poots. Poots.

Putes and what's his nuts? left. The child. No. The child dies. Maybe your brother's still with her. You know what? Fuck it.

I don't care. But the, uh, Jeremy Renner. He's like sniping people for them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We can't expect you expected to remember things. No, I'm telling you, this series just does not stay in my brain. Sure. Yeah.

And that, that's a bad movie. Yeah. So 20, we're 20 years later, we're in a small community in Britain that's being interspice with like World War I propaganda stuff. Yeah, like the like war chanting moving up and down again. I don't know why. Yeah, it's a Rudyard Kipling poem that's being recited. Do you say poem?

Poem. Okay. They're British. Pome. Um, that sounds like a Pittsburgh. You like my poem? I read this poem once. It's called Rudyard Kipling.

Oh no, that's a writer. That's a pout. That's the pout. Yeah, the guy wrote Whiteman's burden. You know that one? Oh, I found that so insightful. What if that was the case? A Storm Hill Light Brigade.

So I'm just going to attribute everything to Kipling. I think we should. Kipling's a fun thing to say in a Pittsburgh accent. Kipling. So a child is awoken by his father. child's name is Spike. Give that kid a real name. I know you're under zombie attack and have been for like 17 years, but like...

Name that kid fucking aluminum foil. Who gives a shit? I give a shit. You name a child Spike. You're raising him to be a bully. A cartoon bully. Or the guy from DeGrocy. Forget it.

Drake? That's DeGrosi Next Generation. Oh, I'm sorry. Fucking pull it together. That's someone worth Picard is the... Yeah. Make it so. No, they shot Jimmy's in a wheelchair.

So, Spike's gonna have a big day. Spike's big day. He's getting the extra ration of bacon. Yeah. It's his rite of passage day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we meet Spike's mom. Uh-huh.

Who's played by Comer. What's her first name? Jody. Jody Comer. Yeah. Fucking fantastic actor. You like her? She's insanely good.

Have you watched Killing Eve? No. I think you'd really like killing Eve. Okay. She's unreal in that TV show. How many seasons of that are there? I don't know. Like a million?

Okay, Alan, I just need information. Fine. God, sorry. Oh, she's in an episode of Silent Witness. Oh, two of them. Yeah. Yeah, she's like in a lot of British crime dramas. For sure.

But she's really, really good. Maybe not in this. So we meet her and she's got some stuff going on. She's having some issues. She's hot. She's saying weird stuff. Four seasons. I can manage that.

Oh, few of you all are bridges in it. Yeah, yeah. Someone told me I looked like her once and I thought that was very complimentary. Wow, that is very nice. She's got a weird nose, which I like. But she's also beautiful. So you two have that in common. Oh, shut the fuck out.

Eat a dick. So she, but yes, she has no short-term memory. She's not remembering that Jamie, her husband has told her that Spike is going on his big day out. Right. And she gets pissed and she keeps going to school. Yeah. Yeah. So she just keeps calling him a cunt over and over again.

Yeah. As the British or want to do. Sure. Yeah. I said it British style. Yeah. You're allowed to say it when you're talking about British or Australians. Yeah.

You're quoting somebody. Yeah. So, um, so they. They go out and they're walking through the town and everyone's giving Spike high fives and they're all excited for them. They're like, you're going to do it, buddy, you got this. You're a big special day, buddy. Yeah.

So they're going out to the mainland. The mainland. I.E. England. England. How far? How far apart are England and Scotland? I don't know. Me either.

Yeah. I mean, they're connected at some points. Right. I guess so. Yeah. Yeah. And this is an island off of, it's got to be off. Yeah, because it's off of the coast of Scotland.

Okay. And because, yes, Scottish Highlands and all that business. For all the British crime I've watched, I get a little, I get a little confused. Yeah, I'm not watching British maps. I'm watching British crime dramas. No. No. You think we should watch British maps.

You ever watch British Maps? It's a good show. Let's do a podcast about it. Nice map, mate. Nice one, map. So they're out there. They're perky. They're out there doing it.

Yeah, they're going to go across this land. Ridge. They have to meet with the people at the gate, and the people at the gate are like, usually we wait to their 15, but dad says he's ready. No rescues. No rescues. You get lost out there, no one's coming for you. Exactly.

So, um, there, and this is, we're getting even more of the poem, even more of the, like, we're now seeing, like, archers, like, Roman era archers shooting arrows and there's all this, like, films placed in. I'm not, I don't get it. I don't get it either. I'm sure that they knew what they were doing. I did not understand. I was happening.

It feels a bit like I'm making a movie for my senior art project. Sure. To me, that's how it feels. Yeah. And then, like, then there's static. They're static.

And then there's, um, you know, uh, a sound garden video. Black old son? Yeah, it's black old son.

Of course it's fucking black hole song. Name another. Another sound garden? Or video? Video. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. Rusty cage? Yeah, but what happens in it? They can't break it.

They can't break that rusty cage. Hold, I got to do another quick gook. Okay. Because I think that this movie was shot on iPhones. Why does that bother me? We might have to pick that apart. Yeah, it was primarily shot on the iPhone 15 Pro Max. Why does that bother me?

I don't know. It does, though. It makes sense because like the first, the 28 days later, shot in digital. It was one of the first big movies to be on digital. And it looks so fuzzy now. Yeah, for sure. Yeah.

It looked weird then. Yeah. I remember the rain looking really weird. I remember watching it being like, this is a bootleg DVD. Sure. Because it looked. That's how it looked. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. But that adds, like, it gives a certain frisson to this movie as well. Yeah. Yeah, if you will. And I will. I know you. Sorry, you caught me mid-ice light mango. Mid-gette-Ly light mango.

You have half a beer to drink. I'll fucking neck that in a second. You won't. So they're going across this land bridge. Love a land bridge. And they, so we know that they're going to have a problem with the tide coming in and that determining when they can not go out or come back. We know they have a four-hour window currently to work in.

Got it. And he's basically going to get his first zombie kill. Yeah. Is why they're doing this. This is important. Four reasons. And I guess that makes sense with, like, the Roman stuff because...

Make a boy a man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Imagine Sisyvis happy. Sorry. Didn't mean to bring Camu up. You know I don't like it when you bring up Camus. I know.

You hate it when I go on my existentialist rants. I did like the stranger. Oh, it's fucking fantastic. I thought about getting a stranger tattoo for years. Like the cover of the Penguin Books edition? Yeah, where it's like the stripes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Anywho. Okay. I didn't do it. Yet. Thought about it. You promised you'd get the wear-old ambulance statue. If we've got a hundred patrons, we've got so many more than that. Sometimes your lies hurt me.

Oh, my broken promises. It wasn't a lie. It's your right. Remember I thought I was going to get it on my throat and you found that really upsetting? I did find that really upsetting, especially because it's pink. And you're a man with a pink. skin tone. It's true.

It's true. I can't wear pink. It looks weird on me. I'm a yellow. You're a pink. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So, they go to the main. A little green sometimes for me. A little green. Yeah. You can all live green. I love wearing green. Yeah, you look great and green. Yeah.

Big green guy. As I said here, head to toe and black. If your slippers were black, it'd be perfect. Your socks are black. That's fine. Yeah. Yeah. So the slippers aren't touching with skips.

So, We go to the mainland. They're walking around. We meet a new type of infected. Is this just fat men? The fat infected. So I could not remember that being in previous movies. Why?

What? They are differentiated in this film as the fat ones and the fast ones? In the 28 years later that have happened. Some of them. We have evolved. Some of them started going to Chick-fil-A. Sorry. So, yeah.

They're covered in pickles. I love pickles. So do I. I love making a fake chicken fatty and putting pickles on it. I do the Chick-fil-A myself. None of the religious connotations. Or the murder of innocent, farming animals. Oh, thank you so much.

You're so welcome. X, X, X, X, X, X, X. I hate that you threw CrossFit in there. They're all the same thing. We also see a woman zombie here who definitely breastfed. Is this also the fat lady that's crawling around? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there's a fat kid running around. Why are they fat? I don't like this. I find it just like...

Because it... I don't want to say that fat people are funny, but it feels too irreverent or something. What I don't understand. Yeah. And they're trying to make their own universe here. They're trying to make something happen here. Sure. But what I really liked about the first one is that they were just focused on killing people. It gave them a rage that made them only think about they weren't eating. Right.

Because by the end of the first movie, there are emaciated and infected around. Right. And we do see one of those, but just one, I think, in this movie. Yeah. And so they're so focused on hate and rage that they don't think about anything else but killing. Right. And so we took that away because that was a fucking social commentary, you know, going on. And now it's like, but.

But it reminded me, did you ever watch Romero's Land of the Dead? There's so many of them. It's the one where the rich people have held up in the point in Pittsburgh. They're in a high rise in the point. Yes. And the whole point of it is like zombies are just like us. Yeah. George was late in his cups at this point.

And like he's just doing a thing of like, to the point of like at the end of the movie where the guy's like, you got to let them live, man. They're just like us. And they're fucking zombies. They want to eat your. brains. So this movie's doing something similar to that of like, you know, they're involving into different types.

People, you got some faties, you got some thick dickers, you got some. My God, that man's penis. Do you see what I was talking about being about being in a penis renaissance right now in my career? Yeah, I do. I do. I'm living my best dick life. But before we get to your best dick life, they go into like a barn. Well, sure.

We got the faties that are eaten. worms. Worms aren't going to make you fat. No, they're not a bunch of fat fish running around. That's what I eat when I want to drop a few worms. Just worms. Sure, you got to go out there and dig up in the yard. Yeah, it's so much work for so little.

Exactly. You don't see a bunch of fat birds running around. Oh, this is Pittsburgh, as you do. I saw a pigeon on my street with a chicken wing and it smelled the other day. It was fantastic. Like an eaten chicken wing, you know? Fucking cannibal. Monsters.

Not like a whole KFC chicken wing. No, you know, someone else got to it. first, but it's not like pizza rat. No, my, my cousin Krista raises chickens and at Thanksgiving, she'll take home whatever leftovers, like nobody else wants, like this terrible, like, you know, whatever. The innards and whatnot.

Yeah, and I'll be like, wow, you, the, the turkey, your chickens eat, she's like, it's best if you don't think about it. Yeah. Chickens eat chicken. Chickens eat everything. Anything. Aye, aye.

So, uh, we kill the, the, two of the, the fatties get killed. And then they see the little kid and the dad's like, let it go. It's not, it's not ready for, you know, if we catch her. It's not bad enough yet. We got to throw it back. Well, yeah, what are you doing? If the point is to kill zombies, you kill all the zombies because he's going to grow up into a big fat zombie.

Uh-huh. I don't get this. So they head out to do more exploring and then there's a giant herd of deer. Yep. And I was like, I love nature taking back things. I like the idea of like deer populations coming back. Like, that's cool. I like this.

They go into a barn and there's a sound that I think is a fox. Is that a sound of fox makes? Is it screaming? It goes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry for everyone who's got headphones on right now. In my neighbor, every night when I take the dog out, I just hear fox fighting. I've never seen a fox in my real fucking life. They may not be fighting.

They may be fighting. Yeah. But they're loud. They're getting up close and personal. That's what we call sex now? Up close and personal. War fighting. We don't know. That's the point.

So they go into this house. They find a body hung up by its feet in the house that has Jimmy written on its torso. Not even a body. It seems to be a living infected. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got a bag over its head. And why does it say Jimmy? Because it's a kid from the beginning? Yes. They don't label all of them with their names like they're wearing like their t-shirts from camp? No. Do we, why is this? Is there a reason?

So the suspected reason is his name is Jimmy. He was a child when he went out into the wilderness. So the theory, do you know who Jimmy Saville is? I know he was a British radio and TV personality. Yeah, who did a kid show specifically. I didn't know that, but I know he ended up being a really bad guy, but I don't know the details. Oh, man. But the theory is that they're all, all of, when we meet the Jimmy's later, they all look like

Jimmy Saville. So it's a cult of... The guys at the end. Right. But it's in a period where they would not have known that Jimmy Saville is a bad man at the time that they went into the wild. Why are we doing this? Why is this happening?

Are we going to end up making like a horror movie where everyone becomes Jeffrey Epstein? I don't find that particularly compelling, I guess. Yeah. Well, apparently they're a big part of Bone Temple, the sequel to this movie. Oh, man. Bone Temple. Bone Temple. See, that's not the kind of thing I want to watch. I want to watch Bone Temple of Poon. Carry on.

Indiana Jones in the Temple of Poon. In Diana Jones. In the Temple of Poon. A porn I have watched in my life. On the H.S. Anyway, he's pretty gnarly, at least. The effects are very gnarly. Yeah, the cuts at his belt line from him shaking back and forth are very upsetting. Mm-hmm. His dad makes him look at it, which I guess is parenting in the apocalypse. I don't know. You got to see this.

You got to see it. He's 12. And he wants the kid to kill it. Yeah. It's like, not only do you have to see it, but you have to kill it. Yeah. But the kid takes so long that it gets free and drops down from the ceiling. How long had it been there?

Who knows? Okay. But as we know, they'll kind of like go dormant until they are like activated by people being around. Right. That's true. Yeah. Because you're not going to get a hog like that. just so um but spike does kill it and then um we're back in the village for a second we see the

class is singing and moms in bed um and kids being trained to kill things with like evil looking masks on them i don't get the masks either yeah okay that just felt like this movie had a lot of details that didn't fit in like they were trying to like give it like a folk horror yeah yeah almost like a witch doctor kind of thing was not landing for me. So, Dad finds some blood on some leaves and they find a dead animal. And then Spike finds the animal's head.

And what's dad's immediate deduction? What's dad's immediate deduction, Alan? Oh, an alpha did that. An alpha. That's one with a big peeper. You see, the alpha because his penis looks like a balloon animal before it gets twisted into a dog. Is that why?

Is that why he's the alpha? I just love the, I don't know. It's, I'm sure it's an apocryphal story of the actor just being like, no, that's pretty much what my looks like. Yeah. He's like, that thing was kind of tight, the prosthetic. Really held me back. Yeah.

Couldn't let my freak flag fly. I mean, if I was doing on that run, I would have to throw it over my shoulder. I was doing it. Throw him over your shoulder like a continental soldier. Does your dick look like a balloon animal before it gets twisted into a dog? And we're getting this like night vision footage of the infected eating that dead thing and then like the alpha like kind of like walking around them like hey how's everybody enjoying their dead out? Yeah, he's like the Nader D.

He's that thing that I think about all the time of Satan in Alucarta when they're like having the orgy outside and the devil's walking through like everybody having a good time. Everybody feels safe consent. You know, I have a, I got to. rewatch Halicard. Yeah, fucking brilliant. Is it? That was episode six, by the way. Why?

Why did we come out of the gate with the weirdest? Without warning, episode two? The Warlock was episode one. We let Carrie pick for episode five. It was the devil of Indian, the beast of Indian, the godmaster of Indian Flats. What was three? I bet it was something totally normal.

Four was Nightmare and Elm Street. Yeah, I think I remember being like, we have to do a movie that people have seen. Speaking of which, thank you to DM Fiend on Bluskey. Yeah. Who has been for years doing a letterbox. Loyalty doing the letterbox.

And they just recently updated it. And that's why I know that episode six was. Episode three was stitches, the one with the clown. That was a me. That was a me. That was a me. So we get a bunch of, an alpha sees them,

and so now we're getting chased by the infected. Right. And they have to go back to that house, and they hide up in the attic of the house. And these are the fast guys. These are the fast ones. Now, these aren't your chunky monkeys laying around the forest floor eat worms.

Fuck off. Little chubby hubby's out there. I have a question. In the previous films in this franchise, Did they have to have a head injury in order to die, or could they be shot or killed anyway? You know, I don't remember. I think they were taking them out in the head.

I think they were shooting them in the head. I just think these movies just fall to the wayside. I don't know why. Yeah. I mean, the first one is like, Cilion Murphy and Selena and the young girl. You can't say Cillian, they get so mad. And Brendan Gleason and his daughter.

Like all the human stuff in that is what I'm really like got, like got me fired up. So like these movies not having that human connection on some level for me anyway. You didn't think this kid's relationship with his dying mother was

compelling? I didn't think Atlantic. No. Spoiler alert. No, he's like riffed with his father and then his mother's death. I was for both things, I was like, hmm.

I'm a parent. Normally that shit gets me. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I was wondering that when I was watching it. I felt nothing. Okay.

I'm dead inside of nothing. Yeah. So they're hiding up in the attic. And we get some, like, just them being stuck up there for a while. They're going to be stuck up there because the land bridge is going to be closed for a while. Right. They can't cross it. Right.

But dad says that he's proud of Spike. And Spike's like, well, I couldn't even hit them. And he's like, I've seen people who couldn't even get an arrow off. You're doing great. Yeah. Very supportive of the son's murder techniques. Spike has a dream. that's in night vision of his mom saying I'm drowning while the deer herd runs by.

And in real life, the deer herd is running by and making the house fall down. Yeah. Why do they do that fucking assholes? I like the idea that the deer is like, you guys would go out and knock a couple houses down. You think they just do that every few nights? Like, that's what they do on weekends. Hey, guys, there's no cars for us to get hit by. Do you want to run out and knock some houses down?

Oh, yeah, yeah. So they just make it out of the house, and now they're on the move. They've got to run to the causeway to get across back to the land bridge. But the alpha's chasing them. With his big flanging dick. Well, this isn't the big dick one. This is a different alpha. He's still got a big dick, though, doesn't it?

Yeah, he's got a fine-sized dick. It's not ridiculous like the other guys. Excuse me. Dick shaming over here. I'm just saying, I mean, it's like, I mean, just totally normal-sized dick, right? Just a normal, total. Dick everybody has. Everybody's dick, gets up in the ankles, right?

Jesus. I'm glad that I'm finally old enough that I can fucking stop caring about that bullshit. You're married now. Yeah, yeah. So, but they get a big spear to take out the alpha that's chasing them from the people at the gate. They take them out.

And then there's like, will they won't let them in? Of course they will. She's like, wait, wait, wait, wait. And he's like, Martha. Jesus, fuck, Martha. We're clearly not like covered in ooze, not ooze, red gunk. Yeah. So there's a celebration in town for Spike having dance music.

Everybody's dancing. Everybody's drinking. Everybody's including Spike. Dad's giving him beer. Poor baby throws up, which like broke my heart. I can't stand to see a child vomit. It's just like, I want to hug them so badly. I just can't stand to see a kid who can't handle its booze.

Oh, yeah. Step up your game, kid. When you were 12, had you thrown up from drinking? yet. No. But I had been high. Yeah. I had thrown up from drinking.

Too much red wine. I don't think I threw up from drinking until I was like 16. Oh, wow. Good for you. Yeah. Yeah. And then I did a lot. All the time.

I didn't know how to do it. We see his dad run off with a woman. Yeah. For a moment, you're like, is that his mom? Nope. That's not his mom. No. And that goes down on her in a little hallway.

Out hunting Zonlemon. all day, taking care of a kid all day and still eats pussy. Can you imagine? Yeah, fucking, not all heroes wear capes. Not all heroes wear capes. Yes, he's cheating on his wife, but. Fucking horniest streak of podcasting we've had in a long time. Alan, look, the times they are changing. So, Spike runs home, and the old guy who had reed strung his bow is there. I'm sure he has a name. It's Sam.

And Sam tells him about Dr. Kelson. This felt like a mistake, like, that they meant for it to be Nelson, and someone mistyped it, and then they just did like a control F, you know? Somebody fat-fingered a K into this guy's name. One of them worming zombies typing this out. So, and Spike's like, hey, man, just go back to the party. I'm going to hang out here with my mom. And the guy's like, hell yeah.

Maybe I'll get to eat a little pussy in an alley way. Yeah, let's all eat a little pussy in an alley. It is much like any time there's like a sessy thing that takes place in like the middle ages. And I'm like, oh, the hygiene is very different. You know what, though? It's like when you and the person you're with both eat a ton of garlic and you don't smell it on each other. God bless. Smart.

Je bless. So he learns about Dr. Kelson and Spike gets an idea. Yeah. Goes hangs out with his mom. He's like, I just want to be with my mom. And that also made me sad. That made me feel.

Sure. Her death made me feel nothing. But this is fine. That's what I mean. Like that doesn't hit because, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll get to it. We'll get to it. We'll get to it. We'll get to it.

Morning comes, dad comes home, and he's still drunk, and he's like, ah, this was fun, right? Spike's like, no, it's not. And his mom is like, you look like you've been dragged through a hedge backwards, which I thought was a very good insult. Yeah. So he, dad, or Spike asked dad about Dr. Kelson and Dr. And dad tells a middling story at best. I mean, the imagery is great.

All the bodies lined up, like, in this flashback. But I don't understand. He's just burning dead bodies. Right. Yeah, which is, like, a thing that a doctor would probably think to do to get rid of these corpses. Yeah. Yeah. And they were all like, no, he's a witch.

He's a bit of a freak with these corpses. Nah, dude. He's not fucking them. Yeah. I mean, maybe. I don't know what he is. They're dead. Who cares?

It does make a bone temple. You guys would come back to the bone temple? I really need a break before bone temple comes out. Okay. Is it out? Oh, I think it's already out streaming. Okay,

I need a break. Yeah, yeah. Heads up. Luckily, we're taking next week off and they're coming back with him. So, yeah, he's got a bunch of corpses. He's got them all lined up. He's burning them.

He wants, he's, like, waving them down. Like, hey, come hang out and why don't you ask me what I'm doing? But they don't. Dad burns the eggs while he's telling this story. Spike gets lippy, so dad smacks him in the mouth. Yeah, I don't love that. No, no. He confronts him about the affair, which is like where he gets really defensive.

Yeah. And we see that mom has a really bad headache. She tries to send Spike into town. And we get this like memory she has of town when she was a kid. And then we see it all overgrown. Right. She's like, oh, that's effective. I understand that.

And the kid says to his dad, do you want mom to die? Like you knew there was a doctor all along. Yeah. Kid logic. I mean, yeah. If there's a doctor and she's sick. Yes, but if dad's like, yeah, that guy's legit insane. Yeah, but he's not.

Right. He's Ray Fines. Or he might be a little bit insane. He's just been alone too long. I could fix him. So Spike gets this plan where he's going to send the gay people away and he's going to take mom to the mainland. Yes, he sets a fire. He sets a fire.

He sets a little shit. And he gets mom to the mainland She's like, hey, we're on the mainland We shouldn't be on the mainland Why are we on the mainland? And she also thinks he's her father Yeah, that evolves. She's like, oh, this reminds me

When I did a thing with my dad And as soon as she says, dad, she's like, What, you're my dad. And she's calling him Daddy, which in a 20206 lens is gross. Also, this movie was made in 2025. So, It's not like she's wearing sweatpants with Daddy's girl

written across the back of them. What is that? Oh, you don't have this? Mine just says objectify my bottom. Ask me why it's juicy. It's because I sweat a lot. Because I'm from,

my family's from the Mediterranean and we're sweaty, sweaty folks. So we see some Jimmy graffiti around. Yeah. Yeah. I guess I didn't put it together that the guy at the end is the guy. Yeah, yeah.

It's Jimmy. Whatever. He does say I'm Jimmy, but you were watching at a car. Actually, at that point, I was sitting at the stop sign between the elementary school and your house. I'd run over three kids, but I just came here. It was 7 p.m. Get out of the road. Hey, extracurricular.

They stop at a church to sleep. They had this really sweet conversation where they're making faces of each other. And he's supposed to be on watch, but he falls asleep. And whatever. I said sorry because I made a big yon. Oh. And then one of the fatty zombies shows up. Yeah, slowly.

Don't worry because he's fat. Yeah. And also very sticky. Why is so sticky? Twinkies, I assume. Fuck off with this. I don't, this whole bit is just dumb. That's all.

So mom wakes up and kills the zombie, and we get that in a flashback. Yeah. And they head out. And then we see some middle. military men running. Right. Yeah.

Who? Who? They're sweets. Oh, this is the Winter Olympian. The Winter Olympian. They all look, he looks like every single male Winter Olympian. They don't watch a lot of Olympics. The only, the only thing I saw from the Olympics was the guy crying about cheating

on his girlfriend. Yeah. Wasn't that good? I love that he was like, I met the love of my life six months ago. And then last month I cheated on, three months ago. He cheated on her. This week, I told her. Bro, save it for MySpace.

You don't even know her. This is the inshittification of humanity. We're watching and just... At least he wasn't an American. At least other people suck to. So these military... Wait, do you think she took him back? No, apparently she was interviewing.

She's like, yeah, you shouldn't be talking about her fucking business on the news. Fuck that guy. Good. Yeah. That's so... It's so John Cusack holding the boombox about... above his head, but in front of the entire school. Instead, in front of the entire world.

Yeah, yeah. So they're Swedish military. They're getting chased by zambos. They run into a tunnel. And this is where the first time we see the big alpha. What, talk to me about him? She's like six foot eight. Yeah, he's a huge dude.

Big dude. and I don't know has a 17-inch cock. Oh, longer than that. I mean, I've seen a yardstick. It's just a kid. Think about it in proportion to his body. Yeah. You know how short men's dick's always look bigger?

Oh, sure. That's why my dick doesn't look great because I'm tall. Six foot two. I've never seen Alan's dick and we're going to keep it that way. So, I'm sorry we've gone so far off the rails. I'm going through a real crisis. This movie is so dick heavy. It's so dick heavy.

And that looks like a very heavy dick. Also, yeah. I mean, like big boobs make women's backs hurt, you know? I bet this makes your lower back hurt. Oh, yeah. Also, the beginning of this movie on Netflix, it says graphic nudity. And that did not lie. That did not lie, nor disappointed.

Nor was it sufficient. did not adequately prepare me for what was to come. We see his huge dick, we see a pregnant lady, and we're like, well, those two probably things are probably connected somehow. And this makes me angry too, because previously the only thing these things cared about were killing, and now they're like, you know what, I also want to fuck. So I wasn't sure if they fucked while infected or if she got pregnant and then got turned. But I think what you're saying makes more sense because she's like part of this colony.

Exactly. Although, like I guess they become immediately part of her. part of the crew. Yeah. They don't get jumped in or anything. Yeah, because, like, or in the beginning of the movie, like, Vicker Dad was immediately like, ah, let's go running. It's me and you guys now.

But, uh, why have you forsaken me? First pass. First pass, last pass. So, but this makes me, like, because Samson, as we learn, he's named. Come on. He's got a long hair and a huge crank. And he's massive, yeah. He is focused on this baby.

Yeah. Which makes me think it's his baby. Because we learned that the alf. So he's paternal. Right. The alphas are a little bit more advanced than everybody else. Sure. They have a little bit more going on up top.

But so we see the pregnant lady. Yeah. Yeah. And she all of a sudden then we hear screaming and you're like, it's obviously the pregnant lady. What? So mom and Spike are walking. Mom gets a nosebleed.

She's just saying nonsense shit too. Yeah. And they have to kill the real skinny. guy. Did the fat guy eat all of his stuff? Of his worms. They go to a gas station because every one of these movies has to have a scene in a gas station.

Doi. And in the gas station, there's a bunch of gas. Doi. And it's making them not feel good. Yeah. And then a soldier shoots into the gas and it ignites the gas. Big explosion. And only the zombies are caught on fire because fire works in a specific way for

zambos. Well, as it turns out, fire doesn't catch people on fire. Yeah, no. Not that I've ever seen. Not that I've ever seen either. And so they meet this soldier. His name is Eric. It looks like an Olympian.

Winter Olympics all the way. And he wants to know what's got, what do we do next? What happens next? Yeah. And the kid's like, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Yeah. And he's also like, my friend's a delivery driver and this is a cell phone because I'm from the real world and your stupid little boy.

Which is just so aggravating. Yeah. Yeah. But it's also, he's also giving vibes of like, this kid is 18 years old. Yeah, I get that. I just don't. Well, how did you feel about the filmmakers of this movie, taking a dig at the way that young women look nowadays?

Okay. Not the way young women look, but the things that young women inject into their faces, I'm okay with that. Honestly, like, as a person who injects things into her face, there's a there's a bridge too far and when you cross that bridge you deserve to be mocked I feel the same way about it that I do about face tattoos like you're you're asking for it you're putting that there and you're asking for it listen you cut your you cut your ear off because the eagle with the eye that was right next to your ear just didn't look as good with your

ear there yeah we probably have an issue probably probably it just felt a little like old men yell at young girls, though, for me. I guess as an old woman, is it acceptable for me to yell at young girls? Oh, but they can't. It just, yes, it hits different when it's guys judging women. Sure, that's fair. Yeah. I mean, I'm just not that feminist, so.

No, that's true. That's true. Also, do whatever you want to your face, but like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like, I think that's what I'm getting around to. Decorations are for commenting, you know? If I'm wearing really silly earrings, I expect people to comment. comment on them.

You know what I mean? Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just what it is. Yeah. Go on then. So we learned that the Swedes sank off the coast of Scotland, which makes Eric say, Scotch on the rocks.

Yeah. And the kid go, I don't know what that is. He doesn't know. Even a 12-year-old, many 12-year-olds in modern-day society would not know what that is. They're eating apples while they're hanging out on a tarp. Big old bag of apples. His cell phone dies, so he chucks it away. It'll be a brick in a minute.

She keeps calling you dad, and I assume on this island that's a lot of inbreeding, but this seems impossible. I hate you, Eric. I kind of like that joke. Do you? Yeah. I have a note that says, I know a dick when I see one, too. Yeah, we all do. Because the mom says that.

I know a dick when I see one. He's being a dick. Eric carries her for a while and then learns that she can walk. Yeah, I liked that. Yeah, that was funny. I would let someone carry me as long as they thought I couldn't walk. You know how I feel about Ariada Grande, just having some guy carry around. You think it's fantastic.

It's very funny. But then we hear the infected in the distance, and mom takes off towards an abandoned train. Yeah, screaming. It's a woman screaming. It's a pregnant lady screaming. Screeging, yeah. Why? Because she having a baby.

Yeah. And mom's like, you know what? I'm a duel of the fuck out of this shit. She knows what to do. Although that kind of makes sense, because if there's been no doctors, women, I mean, that's how, that's what midwives are. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I mean, she immediately goes in there.

She's like, they're holding hands. They're putting a baby out. Yeah. Spike cuts the umbilical cord. That baby just floops right out of there. Sure. Just zoom, like a goddamn water slide. Oh, that's how it happens.

I think it does if you're standing up, actually. I could see that. And running. God, the idea of running while a baby is coming out of your vagina. Why are you so? Stay flicked. Because I'm trying to run and let the baby come out. I don't want to knee the baby as it's dropping out.

No, it's true. Knee and the baby right in the dome, starting it off with CTE. So the guy kills the mom as soon as she has the baby and then he wants to kill. Eric is the guy. Eric is the guy. And he wants to kill the baby, but mom and Spike are like, the baby seems fine, dude. Yeah, baby looks normal. Yeah, calm the fuck down.

Why would the baby, is your sperm? An egg not infected? As Dr. Man covered an iodine that we'll meet in a little bit says the magic of the placenta. I missed that, and I would have laughed at that had I heard it. I mean, that's why you ate your placenta afterwards to get the magic out of it. They asked me if I was taking it with me, and I said, no, throw it in the fucking river. He said, no, we have biohazardous material things we have to do with it. No, put in the river!

I was mad about that. Give it to me. I'll throw in the river. I'll throw in the river myself. then. But Eric is like, I'm going to kill the baby, but he's backing away the whole time. Yeah. Until the alpha shows up. Yeah, Dr. Huge Dick shows up.

Dr. Dick. He liked scorpion from Mortal Kombat Fatalities. So he does that to everything? Because he did it to a soldier earlier. He did it to a deer. I mean, if you could, wouldn't you? Why would you learn another move? If you could do that.

Hey, man, you might have I cut in line? Well, I don't really wonder. I only had one item! Yeah. So they're running from the guy, and there's a child on a huge dick swinging at him, which is why the man had to wear a prosthetic dick.

Because of the child. Because there's a child on set, and you can't have your actual dick out when there's a kid around. I mean, one, yes, great. Two. Still a dick, right? Yeah.

So they were, run away with a baby, there's a chase, the alpha is unaffected by arrows. Yeah, shooting arrows at him. Yeah. But he is affected by a morphine dart? Blow dart with morphine and Zanzazine or something in it. Oh yeah, you know that, Zanzazine.

If you are allergic to Zanzazine, don't take Zanzazine. And why do we have to tell you that? Is that a big problem? Like, man, I'm allergic to aspirin, but I cannot give it. My favorite one is Ebglis, which I see a lot of for. I think it's eczema. And it's like, tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection, but like, fucking tell them anyway. Everyone, tell your doctor if you have a parasitivic. You keep that shit secret. You keep it safe. Like it's the fucking ring. I swallowed a tapeworm six

weeks ago. I'm just trying to get ready for the spring. Its name is Ralph. You can leave it the fuck alone. We'll put a cookie on a stool later. You know what I'm talking about? We'll just put garlic in my butt and bring them out. You don't keep garlic in your butt? just like my nana always said. I need a breathman. Or like, okay, go on.

It's just getting weirder and weirder. So, yes, Rafe, your name's Ralph. We'll say Rafe. We'll respect you this one time.

He hits him with a blow dart with some morphine in it and it like pauses the alpha. And he didn't just run up and go niggity, digity, digity at the guy's giant dick like it was his speed bag. He probably should have.

he's covered in iodine yeah he says don't mind me being covered in iodine it keeps the virus it keeps the I think he says virus yeah yeah yeah it the virus doesn't like it but it makes him like pop on screen yeah he looks great he's like he's the most vibrant thing on screen it's a really beautiful movie

the highlands are beautiful it's really gory I'm enjoying the way it looks quite a bit the iPhone 15 max does a great job I don't know why that fucking pisses me off I like that it does. I don't know why. Is it because you're an Android user?

No. I'm an Android user because it's cheaper. And you can get all kinds of different headphones. There you go. No dongle is involved. No dongles. No dongles. That always makes me think of a cat who can't use the litter box right.

You know, like a dingoberry? They're just dongling over the edge. Dongleberries. So they go back to his house, which is called the Bown Temple. Bown Temple? Does he call it that? Or are we just supposed to assume that that's the bone temple, knowing that there's another movie called the bone temple. The titular Bone Temple. Okay.

He tells the kid about Memento Moray. Remember death. You two will have to die. Strips Eric's skull of meat and tells him to find a place for it. It does. Why, the mom's giving the baby water? I was like, can you just give a baby water because it'll fuck up their kidneys. Oh. Yeah, that's why you don't give a baby water.

Well, here we go. Yeah. I mean, I guess it probably kept, if she was dehydrating, it probably kept her alive. Right. That's why you can't just give a baby water. They don't come so they absorb all the water. Right, exactly. Do not take medical advice from anyone on this podcast.

I can tell you how to take care of a baby. I did it really successfully. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you did. I have a note that says the Bone Temple does look cool. Oh, sure. It's a lot of skulls. But I was also like, why didn't you make a house? Yeah.

You had all numb bones. You're gonna be in a house. All them bones. Yeah. All them bones. Yeah. So he boils Eric's head. And then he's like, hey, kid, why don't you find a place with this skull that was

recently your friend? Yeah. This one here? This guy that you, that saved your life? Yeah. Don't worry. It's going to get worse for you. Mom's wandering around with the baby.

The kid and Ray finds are the same size. And I was like, why is that? One of them is tall and one of them is short, I think. Yeah. I did not expect Ray finds to be a tinyman. No. Unless that kid is like 6'3. So the doctor's like, oh, you wanted me to look at the baby?

And he's like, actually, I wanted you to look at my mom. He examines her. Yeah, does a full lymph node check. And he's like, you're riddled with cancer. Yeah. Yeah. And she has no short-term memory. And she says, I know I'm saying silly things, but I just say them anyway.

So it must be in her brain. Yeah, it's a bummer. Yeah. He's like, well, why don't I just kill you? then and she's like down for it. Oh, that would be a good idea. Yeah. So he hits...

Right this moment. Yes, right this moment. You know, I had a... Not tomorrow. No, today. I didn't think I was going to do tomorrow, but... Eh, fuck it. So they blow dart the little boy.

I mean, honestly, you know how I feel about this apocalyptic shit? Like, your people's will to survive is so ridiculous. Just lie down and die. Life is often shit, even without zombies in it. Excuse me. Hit the microphone with my chin and I feel like it's going to go... Because of that big. Big hollow chin you got.

Big hollow chin. Big, big, big, big hollow chin. It's me, Bruce Campbell. Lead with the chin. Lead with the chin. I like to lead with my forehead, actually. Yeah, they drug spike. He has a, like, trip while his mom is being murdered.

Yeah. It's not murder if you consent. It's assisted suicide. Okay. Agreed. It's euthanization. Do you ever tell you about the family circus? Do you remember the family circus cartoon comic?

Yes, you talk about it like weekly. It's good. It's good shit. Not me. And there was one where Billy was learning new words and one of them was euthanasia and it was just a little kid in a rice paddy. That was in the newspaper. I like that that joke came to your mind because I said euthanization and you were like, obviously it's euthanasia. And then you were like, oh yes, the family circus.

No. I heard youth and I was like, Family Circus. Stupid Billy. So what does the doctor bring Spike? What does he bring to Spike, Katie? His mother's stripped skull. Give it a special place. Give it a special hand.

He's like, I'll climb up all the skulls. Yeah. How are they attached? Because he knocked them over earlier. How is he able to climb them? Oh, you can stack skulls. Mm-hmm. Got it.

That's how Jesus made them. To they interlock. Stackable. They're like Legos. So he does. He takes it to the top of the temple and puts it there. Yeah, and makes her face the sunrise coming up. Gives her a little smooch.

He gives her a little smooch. I don't think I'd kiss the skull of my most loved person. The skull? Like, I don't know. People do a lot of weird things. Yeah, people are all right. But the alpha's coming. Yeah.

He basically breaks in. But it seems like he's never done that before. It seems like, although he has an underground hidey hole. Yeah, I guess you're right. But the alpha gets Rave and he's like banging him against the ceiling and trying to rip his head off. He doesn't get him because Spike gets the dart. Yeah, gives him a little dart action. And the alpha's like, oh, so fucking high again.

He probably just is developing a morphine addiction, but okay. This seems bad to keep giving him morphine. But I'm not a doctor, so what do I know? Do you think he's turning into a real Edgar Alpha Po? But um, p. Oh. So the doctor's like, I think you probably ought to get the fuck out of here with this baby. Here's a shopping basket.

I love a baby in a shopping basket. And he takes that baby all the way back. Yeah, yeah. In that shopping basket. And we get some Godspeed you black emperor playing. Yeah, like that. Although I was hearing it at 1.5 speed, which felt very weird. So frantic, so frantic.

So frantic. So he's fishing and he's writing a letter to his dad about this baby. And he's like, dad, suck it. I guess. Yeah, dad, don't look for me. You're a prick. Why don't you go eat that lady's Puss in that alleyway again?

Yeah. Dad's like, yeah, probably will. This is a baby. Her name is Isla, which was mom's name. Yeah, surprise, surprise. Dad goes running, screaming for Spike. But he's not going to find him, I don't think. But then we get

this part of the movie is like, wait, is this your Texas chainsaw mask or two? Is that what's happening right now? now where Texas Chase's on Messinger is this very serious movie and two is like, uh-huh, uh-ho! Was, were people supposed to know that this was meant to be Jimmy Seville?

Jimmy, Jimmy Savile? Seville? Seville. It looks like an ethnic name to me. Savile. I don't know. This is just like the internet stuff that I've heard. I mean, it's on Wikipedia as fact, yeah.

Okay. Yeah. I think if you, like, grew up in that, you would see these people and be like, oh, they're wearing that outfit that that dude. I didn't know he wore that outfit. It was a child predator. Was he working at medieval times? Why, they're wearing track suits. Oh, I thought, oh.

Don't drive and watch movies, guys. Wait, did you think Run DMC worked a medieval times? No, I thought he was wearing like a, like a page. Like a, like a, what's your guy called that rides the horse next year? Your squire. Your squire. I thought he's wearing a squire. They're all wearing like track suits and like gold necklaces and gold rings on.

Maybe that would make more sense. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because I thought, wow, these guys are from the past. Yeah.

No, they're just like dressed like chabs. Got it. Which I'm sure is an offensive term to use. Fuck it. We already did it. Yeah. So this guy shows up and he's like, hey, really impressive shooting there, guy. You're real good at what you do.

You mind if we help out? Because you're not going to be able to take all these zambos out. Yeah, he's like, oh, look, here comes some more. Very. very like, bubado. Yeah, yeah. And then a bunch of people step forward

that looked just like the guy who was talking to him. Yeah. And he's like, hold, fucking go. Yeah. And then they go and do like crazy karate kicks and all this stuff

and they're fucking everybody up. I have a note that says, it's ridiculous because this is all being set to a punk rock version of the telitubbies theme. Of the teletubbies theme. Yeah. If I start a cult, yeah.

Do you think I can get a bit? people to get my same haircut. Yeah. And wear my same clothes? It's a great haircut. We're my same clothes. Cool. Cool.

We're not joiners and I don't think we're cult leaders. I don't know. I've got a leader. I'm a leader. Oh, you've got a leadership qualities. Don't get me wrong. But I don't think you have the...

I have the commitment. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think either of us have the wherewithal to put a cult together. I'm also a terrible manager at work. So, you know, someone steps out of line at the cold. I'm like, fine. Can't let that happen.

That's how cult's full apart. I wonder if how's that is a Jimmy Seville catchphrase. Because they all do this like, how's that? And then do like a leg kick. Maybe. And this guy introduces himself as Jimmy and then says, let's be pals. Okay. I will, between now and two weeks from now, watch a documentary because I'm not going to read

any books because I just can't manage it. And I'll let you know. About Jimmy Saville. Oh, God. Why would you do that to yourself? Because I'm going to find out if these facts are true. A quick goog would probably do. Okay.

Katie. Alan. You do me a favor? Yeah. You take me to the rating space? I didn't. You take this little land bridge across the rating space? I didn't really like this movie.

Yeah. It was pretty. It was gory. Yeah. It was pretty gory. It was pretty gory. Huge dong. Many dons, but one fucking redonculus dong.

That almost makes me not like dicks. Because, like, imagine. it would tear you asunder. Five, no, four and a half. I'm just not that interested in this franchise. I liked the first movie, the second one was trash. I'm just not that interested. I think I'm a little over zombies.

Sure. Yeah. Understandably. Other than, uh, fuck, what was that one with, uh, Nicholas Holt, the Romeo and Juliet Bowledon zombies? Oh, yeah. Warm, bodies. Yeah.

Uh, I'm going to give this a, I'm going to give it a 28 nays later. I don't want anything to do with this. I've watched it twice now. I did not like it at all. It's interesting to me that you really didn't like it the first time you watched it. And then you suggested that I watch it. Because I wanted to talk about the big dick.

My bestie will love talking about this big dick. And I wanted to see if the father, why have you forsaken me would also bum you out. Yeah, I felt it was trash. And it was just like, this is how you're starting? Yeah. There's a subreddit called I'm 14 and this is deep. and that's exactly what it made me think of.

It's all shit like that. Fuck. I can't go on there for fear that one of my old bands will be on there. No, it's just like, you know. Yeah, you check it out. Okay, okay, okay. Yeah, let's put this one in the past. Bye now.

So. Two weeks from now. Two weeks from now. We're doing a new movie. Yeah. And it is, I point at you. Wolfman. I think directed by Lee Wan-L.

Wolfman. Wolfman. Lee Wan-L. I can't bet L is gone. Lee Wan-L. Yeah, yeah, you know him. You know him. You love him.

Is Lee Wun-L the paranormal activity guy? No. You wish. I do wish. You do wish. Saw. Insidious. Insidious.

Oh, motherfucker. He has an upcoming movie called Insidious the Bleeding World. More like a shittious. Shit. I can't wait to do it on this podcast. I thought it was, who was the paranormal activity guy? I don't remember that guy's name But I liked his movies

Yeah yeah yeah yeah No that's not what we're doing here Oh Orrin Pelly Yeah not close No Not no But close in like I could see how you would

Pigeonhole those two together Yeah Fuck Same time here Wolfman Wolfman Is it short at least? Wolfman

It's under two hours That's not short The best I can do for you these days I really hate this This part of the inshittification of the world What do movies have to be so fucking long? You can tell if you, oh, it's fine, it's fine.

We just went in saw, it's an hour 43, it's fine. Good luck, have fun, don't die. And it's over two hours and I have no fucking idea why it's that long. No, it doesn't need to be. It doesn't need to be. Just cut some of your ideas. Yeah, your IDs aren't that great. Not all of them.

Come down. Pick the good ones. Yeah, yeah, give me a shout. I'll tell you what to cut out. Yeah. Anyway, we're back on Patreon. We just did Ace Ventura, a pet detector. we released Line of Duty series one episode four under our nice one mate um umbrella we've got some uh

we're gonna have some packages to open up in future episodes thank you so much everyone who's been sending us stuff yeah and also stop because it's i don't need stuff i gotta move you're very you're so sweet uh so yeah i think that thanks everyone who's become patrons lately who's bought merch lately who's been supporting us has been yeah thanks for your kind kind Kind words. Everyone is so sweet. We've had poems sent to us recently. Oh, excuse me.

I think you meant poems. Pames. It's patry. It's petri. Petri. All right, let's drop this up. I've got to pee and I'm hungry. All right.

Well, we're going to go piss some food. See you guys later. We, I don't want to piss spaghetti. Thank you for listening to another episode of Werewolf Ambulk. I don't want to piss spaghetti. Clear. No. Okay.