Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 564- Psycho Killer (2026)

Episode Date: July 6, 2026

In this week's episode, we are discussing a film chosen for its dubious honor of having an actual 0% on Rotten Tomatoes after release (don't worry, it's up to 9% now!): the 2026 movie "Psycho Killer." Special topics for your consideration include: the shoddiest of police work, using a vocoder in your day-to-day, hand tattoo placement, Pennsylvania lore, and the work of a private detective. I dunno, maybe watch "Se7en" instead? It's Episode 251. You can support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and listen to a ton of action movie episodes, including oir upcoming episode on "Hard Ticket to Hawaii." We are also getting into the meat of our second season of "Nice One, Mate!" which is FREE EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A PATRON. leave us a message at 412-407-7025 hang out with some cool listeners at https://discord.gg/DutFjx3cBD buy merch at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance the best place to reach us is at [e-mail] we're on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance sorta on Twitter @werebulance sorta on Instagram @werewolfambulance www.werewolfambulance.com if you feel you really must lodge a complaint with us, please do it on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance because we are probably not gonna see that, ever. If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously we have the best EMTs, hands down.

Hey, Katie. Hey, Alan. Before we get into an episode, we have an advertisement from our sponsor. We got a sponsor this week? We got a sponsor spicy, sugary crabs. Hold on, listen to this. Not sugary. Not sugary?

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You're not trying it. No. You're just here to commentate. Yeah. We don't know what they say because it's all in Japanese. Right. But here, Liz, why don't you smell? Ooh.

Sounds like crab oil? No. What does it smell like? It's like... It's spicy. It's pungent. It's pungent. It's spicy with crab.

Okay, okay, I don't hate it. You're trying it. Joe's trying it first. Joe's gotta go first. I'm going first. Oh, they're just tiny crabs. Like, I like that. They are just crabs the size of, would you say like a quarter maybe?

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You're Alan's favorite pescatarian? Yeah. How was that? Pretty good. It's very crunchy. And it makes you wonder why. I like you even ice cream cone in one hand. It is spicy.

Would you like crab? Well, how spicy would you say it out of ten? It's less spicy than the El Sabore spicy salsa. Yeah. Oh, the aftertaste really hits you. That does. Just bite it. You aren't going to get the plate.

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Thanks, Michael. I can't wait to visit your country someday. Okay, well, that was that. Yeah, that was that ad. I hope you enjoyed it. I don't know that we got it across, and we don't know the name of the product. Thank you so much again to Michael for sending those in.

What a delight. Bring families together. I think he did threaten to send horse meat at one point. Oh, shit. Don't threaten me with a good time. Is that legal? I don't know. And I was like, I don't want that in my life.

I do. I don't want a dead majestic animal. Every time on that like a parade or some sort of community event with my niece, Daniela, and there are horses, she's like, Aunt Katie. So I would love to make her watch me eat horse meat. I feel like that would be a good right of passage for her. And her mother, Vicki, would let me. I feel like you got to get like whatever the equivalent of the Renfair turkey leg of horse meat to eat,

not just like some jerky. No, I'm eating the shank of a horse. It's bigger than all of me. I got it out of the freezer at Costco. Yeah. Anyway, psycho killer. Psycho killer. We did it.

Guys, we're in the Annex Annex. We're in the Super Annex. Cutting all of that. No, it's saying it. No, please don't. That's not entertainment. We are in the annex of the annex because the feels like temperature in Pittsburgh today was 106 degrees. Yeah.

We're in the Northeast, baby. We're in Atlantic. We don't need this. No, my grass is dead. My grass is very dead. Is that inside grass or outside grass? Outside grass. inside your heart grass.

I figured inside grass was pubes. Yeah. No. No. Hey, did that joke about having your pubes shaved into a triangle that points up make it into last week's episode?

Probably. Good, I hope so. It's not one of the things I deleted. No, I don't think so. Okay, good. Yeah. Anyway, Psycho Killer. Who picked this movie?

It was me. Yeah. You know why I picked this movie? Because the lady from barbarians in it. Oh, the lady from barbarians. Yay. Jane Archer. No, that is not why.

No. I picked it because it, I saw a headline several months ago that it was notable for having a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes. Here's the thing. You had told me that before. Yeah. It's better than a 0% movie. It's stupid. It's a stupid movie.

I'm dumber for having seen it. Oh, I'm worse for having seen it. It's up to 9% now. So let's talk about that when we get to the ratings. Okay. All right. All right. Psycho Killer 69, baby.

There's a bunch of 609s in those opening credits. which go on forever. It's not just sixes in a circle. It's six nine. Yeah, I assume so. There were 68 other psycho killers previous. Yeah.

To Richard Reeves. Richard Reeves. Richard Reeves. This is so stupid. It's so stupid. It's so stupid. And not even like, they don't even touch the explanation. Oh, yeah.

So right out of the gates, you know, I'm on board. Satanic Panic. That's my shit. And also, we're, I feel like. a movie about a woman hunting down a serial killer is right in both of our wheelhouses. We love mysteries. We love, you know, procedural drama. Sure.

Goes into our podcast. Nice one, mate, on Patreon. And possible dead psycho killers. Yeah, we're in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was going to say, have you ever watched the South Korean film? I saw the devil. I have not.

It's about a guy whose wife is killed by a serial killer. Okay. And the rest of the movie is him chasing the serial killer down. Sounds great. It's fantastic and it's also an exploration of like exploration of, hey, if you try to be like hunt them, you might become them. Oh, interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's really good. Yeah, I think we both really love the Zodiac movie with Jake Jillen Hall.

Yeah, just watched it again recently. This, this is, this should hit for us. Sure. But it's so stupid. This is one of the most first past movies we've ever done. I think so. And we've done like student films. They put them so much heart into those.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This would be into $10 million budget. We've done Don Doller movies. Don Dollar is not even a first pass. It is improv. So we see a man get pulled over in his vehicle. Yeah. He sort of intentionally gets pulled over.

He pulls himself over. He pulls himself over. Yeah. And he's got Darth Vader voice. He speaks through like a vocoder. And vocoder, is that what they're called? In real life? Whatever.

whatever has to fix Anthony Keyes' vocals. Maybe there's just a demon in his demon. Later in the movie, when he sounds like macho man Randy Savage, I couldn't stop laughing. When he's doing his Satan Ben, yeah. I feel like macho man Reddy Savage wouldn't stand for this.

We're in Colby, Kansas, when this man gets pulled over. Kansas, it is flat, it is snowy, it looks like hell on earth. And it's also the most diverse police force in Kansas. It's true. The cop who has pulled him over

as a black man. Yeah. And his partner, not his partner, his partner in life. His life partner. His life partner. His wife.

I think the only people who can legally love a cop is another cop. That's true. Keep your cop loves to yourselves. Keep it in the family. When the guy gets pulled over, he pulls a gun out and we see that he has an ominous tattoo on his hand of three triangles.

And I was like to. Does he have his hand to look like a jack-a-lantern so he can talk to it? Because that's kind of what it looks like. Yeah, it's on like the mouth part if you were to make your hand be a mouth. We don't see his other hand yet, right? No, not yet. No mercy tattoo that's in the weirdest spot. That's in the weirdest spot.

Just get nucks, buddy. All of his tattoos are in the weirdest spots. Yeah. Remember, our friend Simba had no regrets and his, or no regret. No regret because he didn't have enough knuckles. He was spelled Nugles, and one of his hands just said Nore. I was like, are you a big fan of Nore, the rapper, Norega? Oh, I miss Simba so much.

Yeah, man, I was thinking about him the other day. It's been a year. Yeah. Oh, shit. I know. Yeah. So, yeah, this guy pulls a gun out and he's waiting for the cop to come up. And the cop's like, uh, you pulled yourself over.

Everything. All right, buddy? Yep. He asks him for his license and registration and then goes back to the car. And then he walks back up and is like, do you even know what a license and registration are doing all cop voice with him. He gets real aggressive out of nowhere. And I was like, that tracks.

You got it. You got it. Highway Patrol particularly, because he got nothing going on. Sure. If you're Kips, the Kansas Highway Patrol. Kips. So his wife has pulled up because you always need a second vehicle to pull up on your traffic stop. And she rolls up.

She's like, everything good. And he's like, everything's good. Baby, baby, baby, make a little meatloaf for me? She's like, make it go fuck yourself. Yeah, make your fucking meat loaf, you're praying. Cops can't even love each other. It's just ketchup and hamburger. What are you doing?

I think there's onions. There's onions and some green pepper too. Ooh. Green peppers ruin everything they're in. I love a red, yellow, orange. Green peppers? Same fucking animal. They taste, they all have different flavors, first of all, and you know that.

They're not Eminem. Oh, now you're going to tell me skittles all have different flavors too. No, you have to put them all in your mouth at once, and then they taste like skittl. Who eats a single skittal? to know what it tastes like. Psycho killer. Oh, man. So he shoots her husband.

He pulls him in and shoots him, which that was funny. It was pretty good. Gun works best if I get it right on you. Right on you. You got to touch him with the gun. Yeah, it's like opening a lock and a college. Yeah, so he shoots it because the lady cop has come back around because she's like, something doesn't feel right.

So she watches her husband die. Right. And then he throws it in reverse into the cop car that is in park, hard enough that it sends it into the cop car to knock her over, but does not damage his vehicle, which we see unless he takes into a body shop at some point. She definitely blows the back window out and that's fixed. So yes,

he has visited a repair shop at some point. And must have done the work himself because we can see that he is avoiding everyone everywhere. Sure, sure. So she gets knocked over, then she jumps up and shoots a million rounds and misses each time. Yeah, except for the one that takes his rear window out. Right.

And then she yells into her, um, then she yells into her radio that he's on 28. And I was like, oh, don't worry, he's going to get stuck in traffic there because that's a Pittsburgh joke for nobody. Either that or some dude in a pickup truck is going to run him off the road. Oh, yeah, because there's more lanes than you think there are. So she's at the hospital. Yeah.

And her dad shows up. Yeah. And what did she say to him? I don't know. I just was writing, boy, I wish I had a dad. Which feels a little sick. It's just this morning. I was a little mountain call.

Sure. She says Michael's gone. Yeah. And that's when we learn her husband's name. And that's all that. I never knew it didn't need to. Killer goes to the motel and we get a new story about the satanic slasher. It sounds like a really fun RPG, doesn't it? The satanic slasher? Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, I can play the shit out of that. Yeah.

Might write it. You should. I love that for you. Yeah. What system should I use? Oh, man. Because probably just going OSCE on some shit. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, we can make it happen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I would love to assist you on that. Okay. Let's sell it to these people for money. Because times is tough out there, babies. In this economy? In this economy? He puts on a gimp mask with glass eye holes. And like a muzzle, like a Hannibal Lecter mouth.

Yeah. Like he said he might bite. But it also kind of looked like a Janet Jackson microphone. There was a lot going on in that mask. You did have the Janet Jackson. I just want to dance. microphone. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. But also like it's a gas mask, right? Or is it? I don't know. It's like there's like electrodes on top of it too. Did he make it himself? Did he help glue it?

So he goes into the closet and takes a little nap in the fetal position with a shotgun He's a big man. This is a pro wrestler here. He's like 6-6 or something. He's huge. Yeah, same. Yeah. Yeah. This is James Preston Rogers. The big deal? The big deal. The big deal. D-E-E-L? The big deal.

Why? I don't know. It's like at a point of time where I didn't even have friends that were watching wrestling, so I know nothing about, like early 2000s. This is what he looked like. Oh, Sting. He's like a shitty stang. Yeah.

Stang. Boy, he's probably all natural. Oh, yeah, yeah. Look at this man's body. He doesn't look Royed at all. Not at all. Big deal. No shade. Do what you got to do.

Yeah. I guess he was also the Reaper. That's when he was the Reaper. Oh. Did people fear him? Because you're not supposed to. If Lewis or Colt has taught us one thing, do not fear the Reaper. Don't bother. Just chill. Just chill on the Reaper. Don't bother the Reaper. He's reading the paper. He sleeps in the closet and then he's out driving the next day and he sleeps in the car waiting at a drugstore. Don't let your Walgreens parking lot look all red and foggy if you don't want.

want it to be a murder scene, right? What are we doing here? What are we doing here, murder scenes? The pharmacist comes out of the pharmacy. Yeah. She gets in her car. Yeah. She lights a cigarette with a cigarette later, as if those still exist.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She didn't have an old car. No, it was a regular car. It was a regular to-newish car. And he's in the backseat. Yeah. This really bothers me, and I want to tell you why, not just because of the cigarette

lighter. Yeah. Because when the cops are talking about it, they're like, he took her ID. so there's no way to identify her. She's in her own fucking car. He's probably registered to her. See, she's also a pharmacist.

You know what pharmacists have to do? Be fingerprinted. What that cop didn't finish earlier when he said, do you even know what a license registration is? As he was going to say, because I don't. Because I don't. Can someone please explain this to me?

I've been pulling people over all day. All day. They haven't taught us anything in the academy because I'm dead and this guy doesn't know about it either. It's so very silly. Also, what women gets into her car and doesn't look in the fucking backseat? Yeah. Right.

Of course. Look under it, too, to make sure they don't slash your Achilles. Fuck. Don't do this to our listeners. I got those mirrors that I look under the car to make sure there's no bams. Bams! Bams! Bams!

Bams! I'm blowing up my car with your bams! Do you think you are a mafia target? it. They're like, this motherfucker always going to the vegan bakery. That Colette was delicious. How did it not have butter in it? I know.

It's too good. Too good. Listen, you made me watch that movie about Pittsburgh Mafia vampires and now I'm terrified of them. That was, you say, made me. You should say, I treated you too. You gave me the gift of watching that movie. How's the fuck do you get to shady side?

We cut to our protagonist. Jane in therapy. Why does she not take it seriously? She doesn't seem like, you know, she's a woman born in the 90s. I feel like she should take therapy serious. No way, dude. She's toxic masculinity incarnate. Yeah, but why?

I don't know because she's a cop. The therapist is like, now listen, you're doing some toxic masculinity and carnate shit here. And she's like, yeah, shove it up your therapy ass, bitch. Suck my dick. Suck my dick. I have a note that says we are 12 minutes in. pacing in this movie sucks. Wild. Absolutely wild.

I do feel like it flew by though because when it came to the end I was like, wait, is this the end of the movie? Really? Because it just like it turns into a stupid snowball and it's just rolling down hill and getting bigger and bigger and bigger. Collecting all the stupid on its way. Oh yeah. And don't forget, he carved 666 in the lady's forehead after he killed her.

Oh, did he now? Yeah, yeah. He's satanic. He's super satanic. Yeah. He's given Satanus a bad name. He's definitely giving dudes with satanic tattoos a bad name. Sure.

As a man, he's been one of them. So yeah, she goes home. We learned from the news that he is a body count of 32. And I was like, in what world? Why is she the only person chasing him? Why do these movies, why do these movies always speak? Presuppose that nobody cares about killing. Nobody cares about catching a serial killer with 32 bodies to their name.

Five would have been sufficient. Five would have been a lot. Yeah, that would have been like, holy shit. Like 32. And at some point, like, they're comparing him to the other killer, the original Richard Reeves, that he may or may not be. And they're like, oh, yeah, yeah, he's not a serial killer. He's a mass murderer. They're different things.

Because he had like 15 bodies to his name. Wait, no, it's, yes, right, right, because that all happened at once where serial killings have to take place over a certain period of time, right? Exactly, exactly. I don't know. I have a note here that just says, let's all explore life's sinful perversion. Every damn day, girl. Before we get to that, though, because we have to talk about her father saying to her, you've always been Kansas Highway Patrol. That sounds like something my father would say.

to me as an insult. Kansas Highway Patrol little twat. She was like, Daddy. Can I have my binky and my Kansas Highway Patrol hat so I can go to sleep? I've always loved it, as you know, father. He wakes up in the middle of the night to hear her like riding a hot wheels around the upstairs hallway going, wee-wee-wee-you. Going too fast.

You have to tell me what a license and registration is. I don't know. Somebody explain. If people are, it's like cilantro, you're just born without the knowledge or be able to comprehend what a license or registration is. That's a birth defect. Yeah. My opinion. Yeah, so she's going to go away for two weeks.

She's going on a little sabbatical, I guess. Right. Her dad's trying to talk her out of him. She's being real mean to him. And I was like, your dad is there for you. You should be grateful. This is where I learned that she's a lady from Barbarian. Oh, okay.

I didn't know that until you. told me. And was she like, you know what? I did another low budget movie that the script didn't make any fucking sense when I read it? And look how that worked out. Fucking big time. So maybe this sack of shit that I read is going to be great.

Not big time. Though I thought she was pretty good in it. Oh, she's fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No complaints about her. No. No complaints about any of the acting. What?

So the- No complaints about Malcolm McDowell. I will say that. So the killer is listening to Mr. Pendleton, who is voiced by one Malcolm McDowell. Yep. Oh, that's who Mr. Pendleton is. Yes.

He's the one who's talking about life's sinful perversion. Exactly. So he's like a, he sounds like a radio evangelist. Yeah. But for Satan. But for Satan. Yeah. The infernal majesty.

Yeah. And pharmaceutical empire for painkillers and erection medication. Because Satan loves bone dogs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Satan loves fucking. Satan loves a big old tort, tort, tor. What's the word? Turget.

Turget penis. I would accept torqued. You got a torqued torpid? Torpid? That's not right. Torqued? Torqued. Torqued.

Big old dick is what I'm saying. Sure, yeah. We got interviewed for our local newspaper. We had to give them fake names. Because I say stuff like that. Somebody who worked and I said, you have a podcast, don't you? And I said, yep. The end.

Bye. I'd like to keep this job. She was like, can you send us a photo of you? And we were like, no. Oh, hubba-bub-da. So he drives by a couple that's got a flat tire. And he drives by them slow and then passes them. Everywhere this man goes, the fog follows.

It's so foggy everywhere he goes. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. If you're a satanic killer, you're fucking with the atmosphere. Yeah. You're changing the dew point all over the place. All over the police. What else? What else you going to do?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But luckily he turns around and goes back and kills the couple. Yeah. Well, he kills the guy. Charlie. And then the woman steps out into the road and a oil tanker hits her. And he walks away. And then the oil tanker explodes because, like, of course. To which I have written, he's doing all of this because of priapism. He's so uncomfortable. He's a boner for six weeks. I love singing priapism to the tune of a rancid song.

It gets stuck in my head. Priapism! It just over. It doesn't matter. I know that it's a rancid song. Priapism. Listeners, do you know what he's doing? Write in.

Are you Tim Lint Armstrong? Please write in and tell me what song I'm doing. I don't really feel like I want to have a conversation with Tim Armstrong. at this point in my life. Why? Because he sounds like Tom Waits' baby. Oh gosh. He draws a pentagram on the window in blood,

but I'm not sure that that's a pentagram. I think it's a pentacle that he's drawn because like is it up is pentacle and down his pentagram? I didn't know there was a, I didn't know there was a real deception. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the pentacle is like a witchcraft thing.

Okay. And pentagram is your standard Satanism thing. But he does it point up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's not his. He's not a witch. He might be. Witches are for us.

I mean, uh, Satanism. Which is a lefty kind of thing. Oh, you feel like this guy's got like right wing tendencies? I think he's a maga. Yeah. It's true when he killed like copp, he said blue lives matter. Yeah. He leaves a cryptic ad in the classifieds.

Oh my God. He sure does. He's just like on the phone being like, no, no, no. I said M. Am as in Michael with his vocoder voice. Oh, yeah. I got to call in and place an ad. It goes like this.

M. No. M. N. Nancy. It's Matt. Nasal Octagon. To those who also share faith seeking our mutual friend need help.

Please reply. Fucking hell. Meanwhile. Meanwhile. We see our protagonist picking up a three-way pregnancy test. I don't understand that. Generally, it's yes or no. I don't know what the three.

There's no other choice. It means you of the flu. Oh, no, COVID. Very weird. That's after she goes and talks to Agent Zolan. And Agent Zolan is like, uh, what are you doing? Is she the 16-year-old? No, no.

The 16-year-old comes to her afterwards. Comes to her afterwards. Yeah, I just glazed over her going to see old. The Fed's like, yeah, you're not supposed to be doing this. And I'm like, what? Are they being responsible right now? Don't worry, that'll stop. Don't worry about that.

Look, she's a highway patrol agent. She can handle this investigation into a 32 body count. Not that body count. I mean, 32 is like you find out years later that the person's like, actually, I did this many. And they were all sex workers. and runaways that nobody was looking for. It's not just like a pharmacist leaving the Walgreens right after she locked up. We're going to pay less.

Yes. I needed, uh, brother, I needed new boots. I forgot about payless. Rip. Never forget. You're a real one. Yeah. Oh, man.

In the beginning stages of being vegan, that's where I went to get my dress shoes because you could get like plastic dress shoes for 15 bucks. You weren't going to get real leather at pay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. So, yeah, she's pregnant, and then she gets a call from the lady fit and immediately forgets about the fact that she's pregnant, and it comes back up kind of later. Yeah, you sort of, like, at the end of the movie, you're like, oh, yeah.

You were all talked. This FBI, Jesus, fuck, I have ruined the miracle of life for so many people, haven't I? I'm sorry, guys. Oh, yes. Before you, no one knew that you had to have. You told me yourself, with your own mouth, that you can't. look at a pregnant woman anymore without thinking, wow, she got raw-dogged. You told me this with your mouth. You didn't use to think that. This is a thing I have wrought. This is my nail-s-a-son.

Hey, hey, hey. Best friends share everything. Not everything, Alan. My diva cup down. Someone did point out that I said, you're my best friend think about my skeet in the last episode. Did you really say that? Yeah. Because you said, you said, you don't want to think about my skeet. Well, I don't. You just brought it up again. What kind of best friend are you? Skeety one.

The 16-year-old FBI agent tells her that he has hand grenades and dynamite. And she said, I'm sorry, did you say ham grenades? Because that sounds delicious. She's like, oh, fuck, I am pregnant. She's like, dip that in some ice cream. Ham grenades and ice cream. We learn that he is broken into a library and stolen. and only two things.

Two encyclopedias. N&T of the encyclopedias. N&T. I would be furious if I walked into my local library and they were using bookshelf for book space, like shelf space for encyclopedias. I know this isn't Kansas, but fuck. Dude, I loved an encyclopedia when I was a kid.

Rad as hell. Just open it up to anything? The ones that had like the acetate where you could like, it was like the human body and you could like flip it and it would be the circulatory system and the musculature and all that stuff those were sick yeah fucking nar-nar now you just see now you just see it on a computer screen you're like i don't even i can't even flip it yeah is this porn maybe are we doing are we doing this one so she takes our cop the fbi agent the 16 year old fbi agent takes our cop to a motel she's

like oh you want to see his real last room you want to see it you want to see it right because she says he's been staying in motels and our cop is like, I hate saying our cop, but I'm gonna, our cop is like, oh, I assumed he was sleeping in his car. Yeah. She's like, no, here's how we know it's motels. Yeah. She's like, don't tell my boss I'm doing this. Cuts the seal on the door.

You're gonna get caught, my dude. It's covered in satanic stuff written in blood because he killed a person in the hotel room. He has lovely blood penmanship. Sure. For things such as Hail Satan and Satan arise. Mine would look like shit. Yeah. I have bad handwriting.

Whatever the equivalent of satanic chicken scratch is, that's what I would have. They'd be like, does he want a satan hoagie? Al satin? What does he do? Salton. Nights in white satin. This is where we, I don't even know why we hear about Richard Reeves of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Oh, she brings him up.

She's like, oh, that's like that guy, Richard Reeves in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. There you have it. And that's where we're like, no, no, he was a mass murderer, not a serious. serial killer, don't be a dumb dumb. Right. I know you're just Highway Patrol. Well, yeah. She didn't take a detective's course.

It's like, you've ever been to Harrisburg total shithole? It's a capital over a beautiful Commonwealth. I was going to say state, but we're a commonwealth. Baby, it's a dump. Nothing good in Harrisburg is, I'm concerned. Sucks. Nothing good there. Nothing good comes from there.

Sorry, Harrisburgians. Hey Harrisburg, get in touch. Let us know what's rad. Maybe we'll take a field trip. I've had a good burrito there once. Our next live show, Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Live from the Capitol with our guest, Governor Josh Shapiro. My boyfriend and yours, but mostly mine.

This is also where you find out that he's stolen T&T. Right. Dino mite. Fuck off. We get news clips of Richard Reeves. Yeah, yeah. who has, who we are told, was it 13 years prior? Yeah.

Open fire into a church and went to jail. And something, there's like something, a voiceover of this one being like, I saw an 8chan that the government put him. Lowell at the idea that women are on 8chan. Do you think there are women on 8chan? Because I don't. Do you? No.

No. Absolutely not. Also, this movie is very funny. from the standpoint of like it's trying to be like ripped from the headlines because this is like some Dylan roof shit sorry to say the piece of shit's name right they call the church the church is called Christchurch

yeah that happened in New Christchurch oh in New Zealand yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah he was in what North Carolina yeah yeah yeah but like I feel like it's just like okay so these fuckheads and then like the end of it is very do you remember Adam Wofflin SS no they were this satanic Nazi group that was like a bunch of X

military that were like planning on getting nuclear devices and detonating them. So. Why? Oh, because they are accelerationists and they're trying to bring on the race war in the end of the world. Why? Because they're pieces of shit. Why?

Because the internet has rotted people's brains. Yeah. That's really the core. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what it comes down to. Yeah. When was that? Uh, maybe a decade or less.

Jesus. Fuck. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They're fucking, it was, it was like, when everything came out about that, it was like, oh, if you guys weren't fucking fuck-ups,

you'd be fucking terrifying. Right. If you could actually be competent. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, but speaking of incompetence, we see our cop in a diner. She's reading what to expect when you're expecting. And? And hold on.

The waitress is like, wow, congratulations. And she's like, on what? You're trying to be a detective here. Use your, okay. And then she goes, oh, can I have a glass of milk? and the waitress looks disgusted. She looks disgusted because next to what you're expected when you're expecting was the Satanic Bible by Anton LeVay.

Oh, I thought she was like people who, like, that's a wretched book and people who order a glass of milk are wretched people and the waitress knows it, you know. No, it's the satanic Bible that said her all. Look, I mean, for my own jokes. So our boy, Dickie Reeves, goes to, oh, we've also. seen that Richard Reeves, in the, like, the news footage flashback that we get, he had no mercy tattooed on his hand like he had fallen asleep on a book cover. Yeah, it's in the wrong spot and everything. He was supposedly shot and killed while attacking a prison guard. Yeah.

I have written here, Hey, Alan, you like this band? Oh, Venom? Yes, I do very much when he's fucking listening to Venom. I was like, wait, is he listening to it? And also Dark Funeral was on the soundtrack who I also like. So, yes. Man, I love fucking heavy metal. That's because you're a Satanist. Yeah. Blanket statement, I love heavy metal. Fine, fine, fine.

Are you sitting on a couch with a fat dude in a Texas jane soles mask or t-shirt telling you how much he loves heavy metal? That's what I always dream would be doing with my 40s. To be fair, you're sitting on a couch with me wearing a mozzarella sticks t-shirt being like, I don't understand anything. I mean. I don't get things. I'm stupid.

Help me. We are the level of humanity we deserve for each other. That's true. And I couldn't be happier about it. No, you get what you deserve in this world. So he goes to church and he goes into confessional. When he walks into the church, the cop, the god cop. The priest is like, can I help you?

It's like, yeah, do I. That's what you're supposed to do, dumb, dumb. That's what confessionals are. The whole thing that we do in here. What does he do to the priest? What does he do to the priest? He stabs him and stabs him in his head part. Yeah.

What's he stabbing with? I'm not sure. It's a tube. It's a tube. Okay, I thought so. But where did he get that tube? Yeah. It's a tube.

Okay. It's a piece of copper piping. Yeah. He sticks inside the priest's head. And then what does he do? He lets it all run out. Yeah, and he drinks it. He drinks it.

He drinks it. He drinks it. He drinks it. Well, Satan. See. Yeah. Boy, this isn't what Satan wants.

No. Satan's chiller than this, right? Oh, man. If you ever get a chance, listen to or watch an interview with King Diamond talking about Satanism. Okay. Where he's just like, yeah, man, Satan just wanted you to be cool to everybody. Like, I'm vegetarian because I don't want to hurt anything.

And like, you know, I just want to be cool. Why do we ascribe these values to Satan though? Like, well, how do we get to ascribe any values to Satan? Because people do it to be the opposite of the church where the church is like, you have to do all this shit. And Satan's like, I don't know, man, whatever. I'll talk to you later. Why don't you cut your grass, have a cold glass of lemonade.

Yeah. And lay on the couch for a bit. Why don't you cut your grass? drink the two icy light mangoes that are left in your fridge that you bought for your friend. I'm going to get to them. Oh no, I already drank them after I cut the grass. Oh, did you? It's a perfect actor working in the yard.

Yeah, I got to do some weeding tomorrow. Oh, oh. I'm going to drink a mango afterwards. I love it. We're all the sorts here in the annex, annex. Sure. I'm throwing my phone all over the place. Is this where we get the ponytail motel guy?

I was like, he's going to be a bad guy, but he turns out to just be a bad actor. Oh, yes. I thought he was going to feed her to the jaws of Reeves. But he doesn't. He's just like, he just looks like that. So he's staying in motels under his real name. It's got to be he's assumed the name of the killer, right? And just to have the matching tattoo?

No, because of the last line of the movie. Oh, God. It's so stupid, Katie. Is it? It's so stupid. Sometimes I worry I just don't get it. No. Oh my God. What if you got this movie? So she realizes that he is staying in this motel.

Yeah. She tells the motel guy to call the police. Yeah. It seems like she'd get a faster response by radioing in. She does not. No, no. She does not wake for backup. No. She goes into the room and shuts the door behind her so that it's dark. And then she confronts him. She knows a highway patrol cop. She knows he's 110 feet tall.

Yeah. She knows he's murdered her husband. Yeah. And 31 others. But she goes into the hotel room and there's no like satanic graffiti anywhere. So she's like, I don't, maybe not. But then she sees the personal ad is circled in the paper. Why is he circling his own personal ad?

That's the response to him. Oh. That's the code. She has to crack. Okay. And the code is just texting before smartphones. I, Alan, do you think I stood up and screamed? Yes.

I did. Which again is why I'm giving this better than a zero And rotten tomatoes because there's some stuff that happens in this movie that made me gofall That's not a comedy It's fine Listen This world is bleak I'm taking it where I can get it

It's true So he's in the closet Yeah He keeps going in the closet Are they trying to tell us something I don't know I don't think so I don't think so.

I don't think he, I don't think he's a very queer-coded character. He's Richard J. Reeves. It's very silly. Yeah. She, he, the shower's on,

but he's not home. And then, uh, he comes out of the closet and throws her around the room for a while. It does not kill her. No. Uh-uh. Why wouldn't he just kill her?

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Okay. She, uh, does a master class and pull, the TV down off the wall onto his head. I thought that was really smart.

Yeah. For a highway patrolman, she's very versed in hand-to-hand combat. Yeah. And then he, uh, georges her out the window. But I seem to be on the first floor, right?

Yeah, yeah. So she's just like outside, I got, ow. I guess I'll go then. Ow. And he just walks out the back door of the hotel

because they all have them. And goes to... He breaks all the windows first. Oh, that's right. Why does he do that? Just to be a dick? I think so. He's like,

I'm not even worried about getting away. And then he goes to his car and drives away because it was just parked on a residential street with kids on bicycles. Oh, man, so scary. So scary. Those kids dodged a bullet. They sure did. She takes the code and decrypts it because she is a cryptographer. Before she does that, how is she not in jail?

What do you mean? She went ahead. She's not in her. her jurisdiction. Yeah. She's like in a random place. Yeah. She's in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania.

Is this Harrisburg? Or she's heading in that direction. Baltimore. Baltimore. Sorry. Sorry. No, it's not Baltimore because she gets the 401 area code, which I was like, oh, that's Baltimore. So she, she, she is not in Kansas anymore.

She's not in Kansas. She's, dear, dear toto. Yeah. And she has caused irreparable damage to this hotel, motel holiday in. With her, with her head and body. Yes. And ruined the cop's chances of getting this guy right now. They don't seem interested, and I don't understand why.

There's like this overarching thing of like the government wants him out there, but it doesn't make a lick a sense. They're trying to see how many bodies he can get. Like if we can catch a guy who's got 52 bodies. I see. I thought there was like, it was like that scene in cabin in the woods where all of the different departments are betting on things. Oh, yeah. So when she decrypts. Shit.

The code. Which is generous to what she does. She just looks at her phone. She looks at the numbers and she's like, I never had to text like this, but I bet old people did. Which like it makes sense because to the Satanist listening, I apologize. Sorry Satanus. But every Satanist I've ever known is just a dude trying to get his dick sucked. Sure.

I mean, isn't every dude just a dude trying to get his dick sucked though, Alan? Like how many of you met that are like, no, no, no, no, no, thank you. Oh, I couldn't. obviously have another. Thank you. I am just all sucked out. Tries a whistle down there. This is why we had to give them fake names at our local newspaper. So yes, he also decodes the decode.

Fines of Baltimore phone number. Yeah. Calls it. Oh, yeah. I hear that you guys want to help me. It's just a cute little boy. Just a cute little guy, a little Marvin. Who's in this home that is decorated so lovely.

I love the decor. It's very hot topic. It's very hot topic, but I love a dark wall. There's a lamp that's just a human rib cage. I missed that. I think I liked the gallery wall. Sure. He says to him, where are you?

And Reeves says, I'm in Pennsylvania. And he says, oh, then you're not far away. Pennsylvania's a massive state. Not all of it is near Maryland. You could be in practically New York. But if you think, I mean, like, he's not in like, oh, I'm in outer Mongolia. I was true he's not an elder Mongolia. He's not far from Maryland in that sense.

Okay. Marby just has a very large, like he's just, he's looking at it in macro, not micro. Yeah. He does say you can get here tonight. Yeah. And he does. And he does. And he does.

He pulls up to the gates of this mansion. This is where I have a note that says, shit, there's a classic dark funeral song here too. Oh, good for you. So Malcolm McDowell, RIP to a real one. Is he dead? No, but what's he doing in this movie? Oh, he's a tax problem. I assume.

He's Malcolm McDowd. So we see the kid who answered the phone. He's a Satanist with a golf cart, which is a very funny conceit to me. For sure. Very fucking funny. Satanists, they're just like us. Yeah. I don't have a golf cart.

Not yet. No. Should we get one? The poor family one's a golf cart. What are we going to do with it? Just drive it around the park? Yeah, drive around our respective neighborhoods. I'm going to wear a helmet, though, okay.

Try to do jumps. Hi, I'm Alan, I'm Katie, and this is jackass. You can cue the Minuteman. He says to our killer, are you a cop, a policeman? As though he weren't sure what the word meant. He's kind of cute, Marvin, the same is. Oh, yeah, he's adorable. So we get this table filled with like, Malcolm McDowell, Mr. Pendleton,

and a bunch of like younger folks who are eating Chinese food and doing toot. Yeah. Sounds like a great night. I don't know. I feel like having soy sauce in the back of my throat and then like booger sugar going down there too. It was just a weird sensation. You keep the soy sauce in your throat for later. Make a paste.

I have sats. I have sacked. It does seem blasphemous to say, Hail Satan with Lomain in your mouth in that moment. Sure. But, I mean, Satan loves blasphemy, so there you go. That's true. Yeah.

We just get this sort of montage of Malcolm McDowell on cocaine, jibber-jabbering about all his ideas. It's just like, God help us all. But if you've ever been cornered by a Satanist as they explain things to you, Mr. McDowell nailed it. I have not. Oh, well, you know. I've never known a real Satanist, actually. So, yeah, they're just partying and hanging out. Yeah.

And he gives Marvin a job of, like, like going to do research for the killer? Right. Well, he's got, he just had to look at LinkedIn. I mean, Marvin could have done it for him.

Well, that's what he needs Marvin to do it for him. Marvin hires a private detective to look at LinkedIn. Oh, sure, sure. Literally, he's like, I need to know the name of the person who does this job at this. You could just look at their website,

presumably. But it's certainly on LinkedIn. Yeah, but our killer does not go online. Right. And Marvin's like, I'm spending Pendleton's money. Right.

Yeah, because every once while I have to, like, give him a dry handy or something. Sure. Like, there's something Marvin has to do that he doesn't like to do it. We're told that Marvin is the smartest and most dedicated of his acolytes, but I feel like when the killer is trying to explain to him that he needs to find this particular person, Marvin just does not understand it at all. I think it's that complicated. But I think Marvin's also like, you could do this.

You don't need me to do this. It's www.com. Brother, I don't internet. I don't know why he's a macho man Randy Savage in your mind That's what he sounded like to me Elizabeth My name's Marvin, sir

I do love that Malcolm McDowell refers to Jesus as a hippie superhero It's not bad really Jesus is probably cool I love when this woman takes her clothes off And she has under chains Instead of underwear

Yeah she looks great Yeah. Is this when they're going in for the orgy? They're doing acid and then they're orging. Yes. And I was like, oh my God, that woman's going to masturbate with that cross right now. Yeah, that's got some edges, lady. Be careful.

You don't want that. Just give yourself a rose. A cucumber at the very least. Seriously. Seriously. This is where I have the notice says he talks like macho man. Fine. So he ends up outside.

It's during the day. Yeah. goes outside. Richard and Marvin are outside. And he's like, I think you're a true believer. Yeah. So I'm going to let you go. Yeah, the killer says that to Marvin.

Yeah. And Marvin runs away. Like, at least take the golf cart. I thought you were supposed to be smart. It's not my golf cart. No. I don't want to catch a charge for stealing. That's over $500.

Yeah, but he's going to come Malcolm McDowell. No one will ever know. Oh, my God. So he goes back in to kill the Satanus. They're all having an orgy. One woman is given a beage. Yeah. I don't think you're supposed to move your head in circles like that.

are you? Are you supposed to pretend it's like a... You're supposed to pretend... Like a windmill? That you're playing the arcade version of skater dying. You have to go in circles real fast. But with your mouth. With your mouth.

Got it. I thought I've been doing something wrong. You know the whole thing about like when you go down on someone with a virgin. What are you saying right now, Alan? What are you saying? You want to do the alphabet. Someone with a hoo-ha. You want to do the alphabet with your tongue.

And this you want to pretend that you're playing 720 with your mouth. 7-20. She was trying to start him like an old-timey car. Turn in the crank. Jack in the box. Someone in the scene says, Pizzuzoo. I got pissed. He was his Malcolm McDowell.

He was like, tripping and just be like, get away from me, Pizzuzoo. Fucking Pazoo. Goes into our turn on god-awful movies with, was that Exorcist to Charity? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that was fun. Until we do the Exorcist with Hedges on here? We did. Yeah, because he'd never seen it. Yeah.

So the wrestler goes through and kills all the orgy people, including Malcolm McDowell. With an axe. Yeah, axes them to the head. It just doesn't feel like a... single axe wood. Some of them just get it to like their tummies. It doesn't feel like it would be immediate death,

but they all just fall dead to the floor immediately. Yeah, yeah. She's like, I don't have to suck his dick in a circle anymore. That's fine, I'm dead. God, my neck was killing me. And then I'm like, oh, he's going to pour gasoline

on everything. Nope. Nope. He just sticks a full gas can into the fireplace and walks away. Yeah, he's like not real committed to the bit, you know? I kind of liked it.

Yeah. But then he like hears a noise upstairs. So he goes upstairs. Oh, he sees a light outside. That's what he goes upstairs. And he holds his mask up to a window and our lady cop is there, Archer. She tries to snipe him. Yeah.

But he gets away. Yeah, because he just holds his mask up to the window. Right. He holds it up with like a stick. Yeah. She tries to snip it. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

How does he get away again? She's there with a gun. Oh, yeah. He leaves. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And then he knocks her off the road in her car and her engine fails. and she's like, oh, shucks.

As a Pennsylvanian, yeah. The phrase the satanic slasher is going to Harrisburg is very, very funny. Would watch that movie. We did. We had to. I watched it today. So this is where we learn.

I can't fucking take this. I can't fucking believe this, Alan. As we record two days before our nation's birthday. What is the anniversary on March 28th? Three Mile Island. Three Mile Island. 1979, baby. She goes to the church that he originally did the slaughter at.

And there's graffiti out of this says 3MI. Yeah. And she's like, 3M1. What is that? I mean, like, that would not necessarily be the strangest graffiti in Harrisburg. Sure. But like, there's a tag near my house that says, what is MK Ultra? And someone else tagged, I think it's a.

the beer. Like, they don't mean anything, you know? That's very funny. It's very good. Like, I rewound several minutes of this movie to figure out how she figured out it had to do with Three Mile Island. And I watched the scene again and was like, no, it's still not, though. You know how she figures it out? How she figured out? She turns her out of Three Mile Islands behind her. She does. She does see it glistening in the distance.

Like Three Mile Island has been following her in the entire time. Oh, when did you get here? Yeah. Because she's like looking to snipe at him. And then she starts pointing her gun at random buildings. And then she sees three miles. She's using her scope as a telescope. Oh, boy.

Oh, boy. Howdy, brother. That's funny as fuck. So he's got the address for Leonard Wilkes. Leonard Wilkes is the person he was looking for on LinkedIn. Yeah. Leonard pulls up in his car and his driveway and he and his wife get out and they're like having some sort of little marriage quarrel.

Sure. And the killer says, Leonard Wilkes. And he goes, oh, fuck. I think he goes, oh, yeah, Leonard Wilkes. It's just not right. It talks like jigsaw.

Parts unknown. He says, do you love your wife? Game over. I like the idea that you have a problem where you hear everyone speaking in that way. My wife's yelling at me. She keeps calling me. Gorilla Monsoon. A gorilla monsoon ruled.

He did rule. So he is kidnapping Leonard Wilkes by kidnapping his wife. Uh-huh. He puts them in the minivan. Yep. And they go to the plant. They go to three-mile island.

He works at three-mile island. We are to learn. Let's say, I don't know. Let's say you're trying to sneak into a place and you have a six-foot-six, 300-pound, roided-out muscle maniac in your car. And you're in your wife with duct tape over. her mouth. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And they're both together because they're spooning in the back seat.

They are spooning so cold. Do you think he's a boner? Because he's been on erection pills. We've, we're told he loves erection pills and we saw him rob a pharmacy. She says, I feel a little poke come through from you. And he's like, it's not for you. I do it for Satan. I'm hard for Satan. Only get hard for Satan. I can't get hard unless Satan is around in my heart. Hey, that's why that's two. Yeah. So you can always. get hard. You guys can't see it because again, audio medium, but Alan just looked at his arm with a goat tattooed on it.

And was like, hell yeah. Boop! Also, that private detective got paid just to look at LinkedIn. That's the easiest fucking job on the planet. So he's going to sneak into the power plant. And he hides this. giant man in the backseat of his minivan, and there's like five security guys going over this van. They're like, Leo. You just left. Leo, what are you doing coming back? And he's like,

oh, Kruger called me in. Oh, boy, howdy. So he gets in. Yeah. He's in the plant. Oh, and while this is happening, we see that she has brought all of her cop gear with her and dresses up in her California or Kansas Highway Patrol gear. Yes, she does. And a like flack jacket and all this shit. You know why? Yeah. Because she's always been Kansas Highway Patrol.

Always. Day she was born. I looked in her eyes and I said, that's a highway patrolman. Patrol woman. Patrol person. That's a highway patrol person. Got there in the end. So they go inside and there's a checkpoint inside so he just throws two grenades at the checkpoint.

We don't hear them explode. There's like, I was watching this with subtitles. on and it kept being like muffled explosion muffled gunshots and I was like I don't think so guys I think you're just inferring that from the film oh boy but then she shows up at the gates

three mile island she's like there doesn't say Tanna killing in there he's like she's like this place is under attack and they're like what and then there's an explosion or gunshot or something and then they're like let's go fix it she gets like this little tiny baby child to help her out

security card he takes her to behind like a pain of plexiglass he's like it's bulletproof i'm sure you should know you're the security guard it's just diana's bat shit she tells them that this guy's on a suicide mission right and we watch him kill leo and the little guy's like i'm getting out of here get on out of there you this isn't for you he's got on some dynamite taped to his chest or something it's strapped to his tum yeah why did leo think that he would be spared if this would take out the entire or East Coast. Uh-huh.

Okay. He was just worried about his wife. I guess so. Oh my God. Did anybody ever get her out of the van? Hopefully. Shit. Hopefully.

Poor Mrs. Wilkes. R. IP to a real one. I hope not. We barely knew ye. She's just still taped up there. What did she do with that bulletproof glass? She shoots it with bullets and then it's not actually bulletproof and then she makes a bullet hole in it that she can use to shoot other bowlproof.

bullets through. Uh-huh. Well, he's saying like the cringiest Satan shit I've ever heard. It's so embarrassing. I'm telling you, it's mad corny. Yeah. Yeah, he's like got a grenade that he's going to use to detonate his dynamite. Chat, should we shoot a man with dynamite strap to his chest?

She shoots his hand so he drops the grenade. Right. And it is just a little tiny explosion a little bit away from him. Is that what grenades are like? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

jump on them because they feel fun when they go off. Wee. It's like a vibra magic fingers. Whatever. You know those snappers that you get in the box? You just throw them in the ground to make the popping noise? Yeah, my brother wants to convince me to put one in my belly button and push it closed. I heard so bad.

It hurts so bad. Listen, I'm not a fan of your brother. No, who is? Most of most people are not. Kind of a boss move. For an older brother, it's kind of a boss. This gunpowder in your belly button, you little bitch. So she shoots her man, she kills him.

Or does she? The cops are saying he's dead. Yeah. And then we- You're right. I have written, wait, I have to rewind again. Why would our government create human monsters and release them back into the world? That's the thing that's just like said to us the viewers as though it were true.

Fun fact? did not hear them say that. Really? I think I was laughing too hard at this point. It is really funny. She's back at home. She's really pregnant, but that was all a dream.

Wait, we're told that by the end, he had 48 deaths under his belt, including the ones at the plant, yeah. But does he get to count the truck driver that, like, fucking jackknit his truck? Because the lady... No, the lady was the one who ran in front of the truck to cause it to flip.

Why did you run in front of the truck, Alan? I mean, but like, all right, all right. So how far back to you go? It's true. It's a butterfly effect. Exactly. It's truly is. The butterfly effect of psycho killer.

Are we going to blame his parents? Are we just going to keep going back and back and back? You're right. They should be held accountable. I have written, I literally already forgot she was pregnant. Why she got her highway patrolman uniform in her baby's room. Let that baby have its own life. It does not need to be a highway patrolman from the jump.

She has hers and her dead husband's highway patrolman. Yeah, dude. It was a dream. Nobody would really have this bad of interior storage. So now our killer is going to Death Valley with some real bad, like half-ass Marilyn Manson song playing. Why is there blood on his mouth mask? He can't eat anyone. He doesn't eat anyone.

He drinks the priest's blood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The amount of resources it must take to run that prison in the desert are insane. It's so stupid. But they say to him, we've missed you here. or something like that, which means that he was there before, which means that he is Richard Reeves. So do you think the person who wrote this movie is like,

dude, Psycho Killer 2? It's going to boggle your mind. I mean, the person who wrote this movie also wrote 7. Oh, that's right. Yeah, so I really don't know. Jesus Christ, I forgot about that. I know, doesn't that change things for you? Because the script is terrible.

So I really loved it now that you brought that back up. Yeah, I mean, yeah, yeah, I celebrate his Eve. Andrew Kevin Walker. Wow. Yeah. He needs another Andrew Kevin Walker who just like, yeah, he's Kevin Andrew Walker, but he's like, no, no, I'm Andrew Kevin Walker. Altoona, Pennsylvania's own. That's probably the interest in Three Mile Island.

You know, he would have been a teenager when it melted down. Yeah, I remember when that show happened. I grew up in the aftermath of it, but I remember, yeah. It loomed. It loomed. He also wrote Sleepy Hollow. The Tim Barton movie? The 1999 one, yeah.

Oh, wow. And 8mm. The M&M movie? That's 8 Mile. This is a German-American co-production starring Nicholas Cage as a private investigator who delves into the world of snuff films.

I bet that's a pile of shit. Why if we not watch that? Joaquin Phoenix, James Gandalfini. RIP to a real one. RIP to a real one. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like James Gandalfini

should fall on your wheelhouse. That's Tony Soprano. I only watched the first season. Yeah. Do you just think that because he's my people? No, no, no, no. he's like a kind of balding man but very hair suit. Oh, you think I should want to rub my tits on his head.

Right, exactly. You got to type. Craig T. Nelson. Stop telling them this. You told them this first. Do you want to know my last note? Yeah. This film's greatest crime is being boring.

Did you say being born? Being boring. Oh, I thought it was being born. Which is what I'm going to stick with. You want to rate this thing? Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead.

Two. It's a two. It's terrible. Oh, yeah, yeah. I had a really good time watching it. It's fucking awful. It's awful, but it goes fast for some reason. It does not laugh. Yeah. I have never seen more of a first pass movie than this. It's fantastic. Yeah. Fantastically, these are my ideas. Even like first pass on tattoo placement. Yeah. What about like, I don't know, three quarters down his hand and tilt to the right? I don't give a shit anyway. For those of you who haven't seen the movie and aren't going to see it, put your hand in front of you. look at your, I'm looking at my right hand I think it's on his right hand.

Yeah. It is on the back of his hand between his middle and pinky knuckles about an inch down. Uh-huh. And it's two lines. No mercy. And then it's, yeah, it's like a cutesy hang.

Yeah, jaunty. Jaunty. Jaunty. Yeah, what do you rate this in? Kestousay. Yeah, 100%. Is Keskese? Is Keku-Kee, what is this?

What is this? Is that what that means? What is this? I don't know. I don't speak French. All right. I think it's what is this. Can I read you a message for a patron?

That's it. We're done. What the fuck else? I'm saying this shit-ass movie. Yeah, go on, move on. How have we talked about this for over an hour? There's a lot we're cutting out of this episode. This is from listener and patron Matt.

Hi, Matt. Matt says you all are the best. No, you are. I don't have anything particularly witty to say other than hearing you both gab about whatever, continuously, hearing you both gab about whatever, continually brightens my day. And I can't wait to dig through the Patreon backlog. There's so many. Oh, and my wife refers to Yin's as the movie podcast.

Thank you, Matt's wife. When I'm waffling about what to put on in the car, so officially there are no others. That's, I mean, first of all, Matt's wife, who is a person unto herself. Thank you. Yeah. I appreciate that. Second of all, why would there be other movie podcasts? When we were being interviewed for a local newspaper earlier before we started this episode.

Did you guys know this? We're very famous. So fucking famous. They were like, oh yes, these other podcasts I listened to and we just kept going, what are they talking about? What are they making up? What is she saying? She was like, I might start a podcast. I was like, but you can't because we did it.

Ma'am, you have to stop lying to us right now. So fucking weird. I thought cops could lie to you. I didn't think journalists would. Weird. Maybe my president's been right about the line media. Yeah. False, false flat.

No. False flags. Fake news. Fake news. Look, I'm tired. Listen, those journalists. We're just all suffering. The journalists and their stolen valor.

Oh, my God. For real. Like Brian Williams, right? Didn't he steal all that valor? Father Williams? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. and claim she got shot at. She didn't. Did she really say that? Yeah, yeah. Oh. So.

I won't vote for her again. You might have to. Fuck, I would. I'd do it in a heartbeat. I'm with her, I guess. I'm with her if that's my only choice. Oh, hubba, blah, blah. And you want to do another movie next week?

I was just going to say how fun this was. Yeah, we should do it again next week. Let's do it again next week. Let's do a movie of your choosing, which I'm very, very, very, that we're both excited about. What is it? Ready or not to, here I come.

It's not funny when we do it to people that aren't us. So come back next week for that. If you want to hear more stuff, you can get us become a patron at patreon.com back slash wharrowfambulance. We got to get another action movie up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Someone suggested we do a movie called, I was going to see if you,

were also down with this, we would just skip the pole and do this movie. Okay. It's our thing. I mean, I know they pay for it, but we can do it every want. Yeah. Hard ticket to Hawaii. Perfect. So, 1987. Uh, they describe it as being on tuby. It has a highly dangerous snake, lots of rocket launchers, karate, and enough titties to break your bell. Oh, my God. Why haven't we done this before? So, uh, join the, uh, Patreon because our next action movie's going to be hard ticket to Hawaii. And then you can get vote for the one after that. Yeah. Also listen to all our episodes of Nice One Mate for free without even having to pay us.

We're already in the second series. We've done two episodes of that so far. For some reason, this one isn't sticking in my brain. I feel like I need to rewatch the first two and then watch the third one. But that's just, that's just your brain be like, give me, give me, give me more of that Steve Arnaut. I just want to fuck him so bad. No, no, no.

You gave most fuckable, me. You came to so care. You're in America, though. No, I'm in America. We got Craig T. Nelson. And James Gandalfini's. What are we doing here? Let me go home.

Thanks for listening to another episode of Werewolf Ambulance. I'm so sorry. Goodbye. It's real hot, y'all. Brains ride. Stay cool. Stay cool, guys. Yeah.

Bye. Bye.