Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 99- Final Destination (2000)

Episode Date: September 12, 2016

EMTs, this is our 99th episode! Accordingly, we're celebrating a near-achievement with some near-death experiences in our discussion of the 2000 teen slasher/thriller "Final Destination." Special topics for your consideration include: our confusion regarding Y2K, fashions of the turn of the century, Rube Goldberg death machines and the fear they invoke, what in the world anyone was thinking with Tony Todd in this movie, future funeral wishes and ceruuuuuleaaaan bluuuuue.  Have you seen this one? What do you think about it? What about the other 34-ish films it seems to have spawned? Let us know at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance, on Instagram @werewolfambulance or by emailing us at [e-mail]. You can also buy our t-shirts designed by the astounding Justin Gray by Paypaling us $15 to the above email address and letting us know what size and where to ship it. We're unfortunately down to M, XL and 2XL, though. Thank you so, so much to those of you who have purchased them already. You are the best.  While you're in the spending mood, check out our sponsors Cryptocurium (the monthly subscription box called the Parcel of Terror, which is filled with incredible handmade horror goods and art that can be obtained at www.cryptocurium.com) and fine artist Dylan Garrett Smith (whose creepy wonderful art can be purchased at www.dylangarrettsmith.com with a 25% discount using the coupon code EMT25.) You will not regret either, we promise you! Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. 

Hey Katie. Hey Alan. I really like what you're wearing. I think baggy cargo pants are going to make a comeback and that, what is it, a bowling shirt? That looks really nice. Here's the thing, I think if I wear it, it comes back. Oh, I got you. I got you. So it's back.

The Peewey haircut is a little odd on you, but I like it. I think if I wear it, it comes back. Oh, I got you. So it's back. The Peewee haircut is a little odd on you, but I like it. I think you're- I just thought that if I pushed it forward and then fooped it up, it would look good with my features. Yeah, if you just comb it from the back and then foop it. Yeah, fooped right. this movie. Oh boy, 2000. 2000 was a weird year of not being the 90s but not being real. What are the 2000s anyway? We were all recovering from whatever that 2000 syndrome was that we all had where everything was going to break. Oh, Y2K? That's the one. Why couldn't I remember Y2K? I don't know.

Katie? Katie. Alan. We didn't mention that this is a were were wolf ambulance. Oh no. that we say th. G th. G th. G th. G th. G th. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. What the th. What the th. What th. What the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. What are. What are. What are. What are. What are. What are. What are. What are. What??. What?. What?. What. What?. What?. What. What? th. What? th. What. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. th. tho. tho. tho. th. the. th. tho. th. th. th. th. thank you for listening. No, no that we say that at the end. Welcome. I just started making fun of a man's fashion. You know, it was a child's fashion really, so who cares? I know fashion that I also wore. No, not those big, oh maybe I did, those shirts, I don't know. You know, you, I think you did. I feel like if you're saying maybe you did, you probably did. No, I mean I was more, yeah. By 2000 I was just wearing shorts and t-shirts, just like I am right now. Yeah. I got locked in then. I don't know what I was wearing in 2000. I feel like their fashion is like... I think I wore like little boys t-shirts and sweaters because it was a very emo time

for me. Oh, yeah, 2000 was a very emo time for, I have bands that I could play that were very emo time that I was in. Yeah, we are here to talk about the film Final Destination. My first note says, I want to say final destination, even though I haven't seen it yet. I think I saw this movie in high school and have not seen it, had not seen it since. I think I saw it in the theater when it came out. Wow. You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. the th. Yeah. Yeah. the th. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. th. th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. Yeah. th. th. t. t. t. t. Yeah. th. t. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'm. th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. t. I toda. t. I toda. I t. t. I t. I don't go to that many theater movies. Especially in this time period, I was still living in Delaware then and the fuck else I'm gonna do. True. My band's not playing a show, there's not a show I can drive to somewhere, I'll go to a movie. My first note is that the names in this movie are not the famous filmmaker and film stars. There's Shrek from, Max Rek from Nosferratu, there's...

Who's Shrek? One of the FBI agents that's named Shrek. There's Murnau, there's all these, Val Luton, Valerie Luton, is Valuton, the film producer. So there's just like throughout the film, everybody's named after someone famous from like the silent era in the 40s and 50s. Well, this movie was written was written was written was written wwritten was written wwritten was written wwritten was written like a shitload of X-Files episode, right? And it was directed by James Wong. Right. All of the actors that aren't like famous teen actors were in X-Files. They were extras and X-Files. His dad was the Sirulian Blue guy, yeah. Yeah. His friend was the guy who was eating the raw meat. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And Tony Todd was the guy who came

back from the dead. Do you remember that? I think he was like... He was the soldier, yeah. He had, they had removed his Batuas boy? Yeah, and he couldn't sleep or his serotonin or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So in watching this movie, this movie is not great. But if you watch it like a super long X-files episode, it makes so much more sense. Well, it was written by, what is it, Jeffrey Reddick? He had written it as like a spec script, which is like a fake script that you write to get a scriptwriting job. And then James Wong and Glenn Morgan were like, oh, we could do something with this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then when they started doing that, new line was like, you can make a movie out of that jungle. Okay. Which is cool.

But it's very ex-file zion. But I do, like in retro, like the first time I watched this movie, I fucking hate it. I was so annoyed with the idea that death can't get you. It's a fucking death. You'll just die. Your heart will stop and you'll be dead. mythological precedent for that. For sure. In actually the Sisyphus myth, you know, where he's pushing that damn boulder up the hill and again, yeah. Prior to his going to the underworld, he cheats death by getting him to put handcuffs on himself, the god, banitos, the god of death, gets him to put handcuffs on himself and like shoves him into a closet. And for three days he's locked in this closet, and for thi. And thi. And for thi. And for thi. And for th. And for thi. And for th. And for th. And for th. And for thi. And for thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, their their, their th. Prior. Prior. Prior thi. Prior to to to thr-s. Pri. to thr-s. tri-s. triu-s. tri-s. toe. to to thr-s. to to thr-s. Prior to to closet and there's a war going on and people are just like running around with no heads because nobody can die because death is locked in a closet.

I think there's a Twilight Zone episode. That is like this premise of like death is like either quits or... Yeah, this sounds really familiar. Yeah, or it just like for some reason death can't do death job. Yeah, like, there's like an old lady and the boy that are talking about how death can't do his job anymore and she like wants to die and can't. I don't know. I may be making it on the zone. So there is some sort of precedent for this idea that death, death, death takes a vacation.

But like death makes Rube Goldberg devices to murder everyone I mean, I guess we should talk about what this movie, what happens in this movie, but basically like these kids are on a flight to France for school, there's like 40 students and two teachers, and our protagonist, Alex played by Devonsawah of Idle Hands fame, which we should get into at some point. I don't know what that is, so yes. It was another horror movie where his hands became possessed by the devil an devil devil devil thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi. I thi. I th. I th. I was, th. I was, th. I was, th. I was, th. I was, thi. I was, thi. I was, thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. There, th. There, th. I is, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thi. I is, I is, I was, I was, I was like, I was like, I'm, I'm like, thi. I'm like, thi. I'm like, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I was like, thi. I was like, the devil I think. Oh, I got you. If I recall correctly, spoilers. Fridal hands. I don't think that's spoilers. I think that's the IMDB tagline. He has like a premonition of the plane exploding.

Right. Very violent, very real premonition. He freaks out on the plane. Anger guy just punches him. Dawson's Creek. There's gonna be so many references of this I don't get. Yeah, well I was in high school. Why does he punch him? Because he's so mad about everything all the fucking time. He seems to have beef with that kid. He's mean to that kid. He's mean to his girlfriend. He's mean to his. Have you ever seen a Harry Krishna in an airport? Never in my life. Yeah, no.

Other than airplane, the film Airplane? That's the only time I've ever seen a Harry Krishna in an airport. They're always referenced as being an airport, so I've never seen one. And I used to go to shelter shows all the time. Anyway, it's a shelter shout out for people who remember them. It's established that he's very superstitious. Okay, so were the numbers? He's like, everyone keeps saying numbers too many keep seeing numbers everywhere. Yeah. Do they mean, do they, like, is there some significance to them? I know there are people who people are real hung up on like numbers having significance and like when she was like 925, that's your birthday. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they th, like, like, th, th, th, they they they they they they they they their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they, they, they, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. the, the, the, the, thu, thu, thu, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, 925, that's your birthday. Yeah. And he's like, well, blah, blah, or like, but there's also like, um, his mom rips off his previous flight tag off his bag.

He was like, well, I made that time. Kind of a dick move, because he was like, go fuck yourself. Teach it him a lesson. It's a dick lesson. It's not good. It's also so X-files. It looks like. It's also so so so so so so so so so so so so so the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the he. the he. he. Well, well, he. Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, he. He's before. He's before. He's before. He's before. He's before. He's before. He's before. He's before. He's before. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he's before, the he's before, before, before, before, the he's before, before, before, he's he's before, before, he's before, before, he's before, he's before, before, before, he's before, he's before, he's before, he's before, he's before, he's before. He's before, he like everybody's getting pulled out of the plane. I don't remember that. Oh, never mind. No, no, it's fine. It's been a while since I've gone down the X-Files path. You should revisit it.

It really holds up. Yeah. I love the X-Files. I can tell. I know, you know. You kind of have like a Jillian Anderson. thap. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. It. to. It. It. It. to. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's a. It's a. It's a the. It's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the a deeper, a deeper side part. And also in college when somebody told me I looked like Jillian Anderson, I lost my fucking mind. I had red hair at the time though, so whatever. I remember when someone, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Or the guy. David Ducupney. Yeah, California. I never saw that. I don't, like I don't want to see him in anything else because because because because because because hea because because, hea he he he he he he he he he th. th. th. th. th. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,'t, he's, like, I don't want to see him in anything else because he's fox molder to me, which I think is probably a problem. Also, the dad says something to his son, like, you have your whole life ahead of you, and I

was like, God, I'm so glad no one says that to me anymore. You know what I mean? I'm so glad to start working on me going, hey man you've got like half left? You're good, you're good, you're good, if you're careful, if you're careful you have half left, you know. They're going to France, yeah and he has this remission, they get kicked off the plane because him and him and anger management boy start punching each other. And Stifler has come out of the bathroom. I don't know, like, they just get kicked off the plane. Is that Sean too many names? Yep, Sean three first names. Sean William Scott.

Yeah, Stiffler is an American Pie reference? Yes, I feel like he's only Stifler to most people. I know him from that, um, he's very funny in that movie. Yeah, I think he's um, I think he got a little bit like type cast as like a real goofy character. I think that's all he plays, but he does it, he nails it, he nails it, he nails it, he nails, he's, yeah, I actually have the no-disk because Sean Williams-Cott plays a good dope. Is he better than Adam Sandler? Yes, because I'd want to not a thing you can do. You can't just say that, even in a pre-911 world. And Ali Larder, who is, you can tell

that she doesn't have a lot of friends because she's got brown hair. Yeah, and a book. She's reading? She's reading. She's reading Tropic of Cancer, which is my signfield reference. that was the book that they were were that that was that was that was that was that that was that that was that was that that that was th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thoom. the. the. the. thoom. thoom. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. stand yeah episode it doesn't matter. Some people know what I'm talking about and some people don't. I just have that German Shepherd thing where my head went to the side. You did. And you from what? That's fine. I was like Henry Miller is that what we're talking about?

Nope. Just time. So she's got a book in top and has perfect abs. That girl would have friends. What was the other movie we did that she's in House on Hunt Hill? House on Hunton Hill. Yeah. Where she's like... She's kind of supposed to be like a loser in that too. No. Stop, stop it. She's this unbelievably like stunningly gorgeous woman. I feel like this is the craft all over again. You've th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th th th th th tho tho tho, I thi thu tho, I tho, tho, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, oh, oh, oh, thu, oh, thu, thu, thu, thu thu thu, thu thu thu thu, thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu th. th. th. thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii thii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi this is the craft all over again. Like, you've got brown hair, you're ugly. Also, before they get on the plane, there's that scene of his friend talking to him about

pooping on the plane. What? What? What? Was that supposed to establish that they have a bond, I think so? I mean, since you and I have a bond, I'm going to tell you, I don't tho, I don't tho, I don't tho, I don't tho, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm going thin thin thin, I'm thin, I'm thin, I'm thin, I'm thin, I'm thin, I'm thin, I'm thin, I'm going thi, I'm thin, I'm thi, their their their their their their their their their there, there, there, there, there, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi thin, I'm going thin, thi. thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, the. the an theanan, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean,the plane going down and them finding my corpse with my pants around my knees. I know that's not how it works, but I just imagine like a bunch of rescue people picking through the carnage and being like, this one's got her pants down. And like for some reason in this scenario.

No, you'd have to be rescued with your pants. Like, like, like my hands have been fused to the newspaper I was inexplicably reading like and so I can't pull my pants back up. So someone has to do it for me and they're like oh I'm sorry madam we can't do it right now we have to photograph the scene and I'm like but my pants are now. Wait are you still alive in this scenario? Okay okay I thought we were I thought it was a yes and. Moving forward. So that's why I don't I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I that's that's th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. to. I th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thought it was a yes and. Moving forward. So that's why I don't poop on a plane. I honestly will not go to the bathroom on a plane if I can help it. I flew to London, I was like I will hold it for 10 hours, I don't care. I once heard, and it's I'm sure not true that people get sucked, like have their intestine

sucked out through the paint lane and all that stuff. Like a hot tub. Everyone that was a thing that was happening a lot. Kids sitting on hot tubs and getting their poop shoots pulled out. No, don't. Oh, that was, I feel big in like the early 90s. Wasn't that, what's that guy's named, Chuck Pawlach? Yeah.

Yeah. He had that story of like, like, uh, like, or the book of like, a collection of like, gross, eerie stories or whatever. And there was the guy who got his like, rectum, like, pulled out and had to chew his way out of it, or else he was gonna drown at the bottom of the pool. I think he read that, theyrea, that was the story he would read on that book tour. I think that's hilarious. You like that guy? I've never read anything by him. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I don't know anything. I don't know anything. I don't know anything about him. Uh, he's like less shitty than Brady's nails. Remember that guy who stopped listening to us because we didn't like Brady's to know us? Go fuck yourself, sir. So the plane crashes in his dream and then they get kicked off and then he sees it happen through the window of the airport. Super scary, I think it's great. Not scary in a horror movie way, but scary in like a real life terrifying. Real life. We have to mention that Rocky Mountain High by John Denver was playing while they were shooting.

Was it? And he comes up again later. Because he said John Denver. John Denver died the plane crash. Oh yeah you're right. Yeah. Because it keeps repeating throughout the movie. I do have the note somewhere that says like imagine if Rocky Mountain High was the last fucking. Awful. And not thank God I'm a country boy, because that song kicks ass. I will never say that I like a John Denver song. I love thank God I'm a country boy. Yeah, fine. Do you know?

What's the... I just makes you want to like. I guess Danny's song is okay. Is that what it's called Danny's song? I don't know. I don't know. But what about about about about about about about about about about about about about what about what about what about what about what about what about what about what about what what what what about? What about? What about? What about? What about? What about? What about? What th? What th? W, th? W, th? W, I th? W, I th? W, I'm? I'm, I'm, I'm, I th. th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm, I th. I th. I th. I th. I that that that that that that that th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm? I th. I'm? I th. I'm? I'm? I'm? I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. than. than. I'm than. I'm than. I'm than. I'm tha. I'm than. I'm tha. I tha. I tha. I tha. I don't know. I'm... But what about when he goes, Whoa! Like God, I'm a country boy. Go on, let's make you happy? I don't like country. Okay, that's true. You don't look the out

of doors. No. I like being inside looking at other people from my window. Did you notice that the baggage trolley had 666 written on it? I didn't, that's good. Stupid and good. That's, yeah, that's gonna come back in my review of this, or my rating space. Great. So both times as this plane lifts off in the dream and in real life, they have the quickest taxed I've ever seen a plane take. They don't don't don't don't don't don't, the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th thi, thi, thi, that, thi, thi, thi, thi, that, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th, th. th, th, th, th. th. th. th. That's, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thii. And theeanan, thean, thean, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi, th I've ever seen a plane take. They don't sit on the wrong way at all. Um, so everybody dies except for these people who got kicked off.

Correct. And then we go to a memorial at the school. Yes. The memorial has an eagle on it. God, I hope my memorial has an eagle on it. Was it an eagle or a raven? I couldn't tell what it was? . it was. Do you think it was a red-rested tit thrush? Probably. But I want an eagle in mine, okay?

Can you make that happen? Yes, definitely. Thank you. I don't understand anybody's anger in this movie. Everybody's reaction is inexplicable to me. Yeah. Yeah. Ally Lardner, I love that she has taken a life oath to him and like you saved my life. I will do anything you need ever. Also did you think her name was Claire? Yeah, it's not Claire. It's Clear River. Every time I kept coming up on the sunflows, I was like, yeah, they're just kind of saying Claire in like some weird accent but they're saying clear. I didn't happen on subtitles.

I didn't see it until the credits rolled and I was like, her name was clear? Why? Oh man. So they have this memorial that's full of morbid death talk. It's not about like moving on or like the afterlife or like touching lives or like really missing people. It's about like how death can take you at any time. Yeah. That's not how you do memorials. And then everybody's so mad at this kid. They think that he caused it? Why do they think that he caught? It's like so inexplicable.

Because he knew, because he knew, he knew exactly what's going to happen. And that's why he has the dumb FBI guys following him the entire time. I love the dumb FBI guys though. They're so good. And the kids who survived had like a different to to to to to to didn't notice that. It was like kind of like signaling them out. Definitely mark them. They should definitely be marked. Also, Alex, your suit did not fit at all.

I don't know who got you that's his suit. It was his dad's. Exulion blue guy. You know what I'm talking about? I don't, but I'd like that you that you that you that you that you that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you like that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that that that that that you that you that you that you that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the thi the. the. thi thi thi the. the. the the. the the the theeeee He, in his ex-files episode, he plays a convict who can control people's minds with his voice and he can get them to do things. And so he is in the backseat of a police car and he's talking about the police officer's uniform and he says, it's a beautiful blue. Surreulian blue.

Surreux. And the cop like allows a truck to hit him and then the car wrecks and he gets out and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and their, and takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, takes, they, takes, takes, and they, and they, and takes, and they, and takes, is their, is their, is their, is a tocks, is a, is a, is a, is a. And, is a. And, is. And,i thi thi thi the thi the the the they their their their their their their they their their their their the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they they they they they they they they they they they they thuuuuuuuu toy toy toy toy toy toy toy so so so so so so so so so so toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. th. th. I th. th. th. I this whole thing is like a very long monster of the week that has gone totally out of hand. Yeah, for sure. So like nobody wants to be his friend except clear. Yeah. Remember what he? So, there's a picture from the memorial in a newspaper wall and he's like looking at it and it's just clear. She's sitting there with her flower. I'm going to call her Claire if that's okay. That's fine. Okay. That's at the photo and then he fuls out paper porn. Paper porn, everybody.

Do you guys remember paper porn a magazine? A porno magazine? Who's seen one of those in like 15 years? The jerking off thing was just, I felt very gross and weird. Yeah, but you know, he's a high school boy and that's all we do. Or just frantic masturbators. I guess, the the the the he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he, but he's, but he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's he's he's like, th. He's like, he's like, he's th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- thi, he's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's like, th. He's like, thi. He's like, thi. He's like, thi. He's like, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that's all we do. It's just seemed to be frantic masturbators. I guess so. But he's like got a jerk off to the pen house and then keeps looking at the picture. I know that's what made me really upset. What if that's how he figured out that's his thing? I got

to kill up like a plane full of people from able to like, oh my God. I just need to watch like 200 people die before I can get a boner. That's really awful. It's got to be somebody's thing or we just created it. Ew. No, no trademark? No, no, no trademark. No, no, I don't want. This is me washing my hands of it.

So his friend Todd is at home. He's a super clean shaven already and he's rubbing a razor against his dry neck. Just immediately cuts himself. He should have done the predator your ghost in us, motherfucker sequence. Oh yeah, I like that. Yeah, he just immediately cuts himself. Yeah.

And then this is your first Rube Goldberg kill. His death is awful. I mean, it's in like a really upsetting way. I mean, it's great. Like, the scene is great. It's super tense. It's frightening. God, that's awful. Death loosens a valve and a bunch of water comes out and like. Scoots under his feet.

But it's not water. It seems to be some sort of slippery, viscous. I think it's supposed to be like the the the the and there was a clothing line for his mother's sundries and he gets wrapped up in that and it's choking him out and it's just like slowly tightening. And he's grabbing at it and freaking out in his feeder like he's in the tub and his feet are slippery so he can't like stand. I mean... it's a really upsetting. This really cuts me deep. Yeah. I am a warrior, a constant. So so so so so so. I'm like. I'm like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like a ch like a ch like a ch like a ch like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. I the c. I the c. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. I'm like a ch. I the the the the the the the the the the c. I the the c. I the c. I the c. I the c. I the c. I the the the the the c. I'm like a ch. I'm like a ch. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. I'm like a c. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. I the. I upsetting. This really cuts me deep. I am a warrior, a constant warrior, so every time, I'm like a checker also, like I cannot leave my house without making sure like my curling iron is unplugged and then going back upstairs

and I have to touch the outlet and say it's unplug, don't toub. Whether or not I've locked my front door, I'll often check that. It's lunacy and it's really annoying. But I also just am constantly, as you guys know, I'm very fearful of everything. Like I don't like cardboard because I'm afraid of getting a massive paper cut from it. I know. So I'm constantly thinking about things that can go wrong and kill you and this is just tapping that for me like so hard. I love when he's being choked out and there's just the scene where it's both the blood the blood the blood all all all all all all all all all all all all all the blood, all the blood, all the blood, all the blood, all the blood, all the blood, all, all, all, the blood, the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. tho tho th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. you th. As you you you you you you thi, as you you you you thi, as you you you you the, as you you you you thi, as you thi. I loved when he's being choked out, and there's just the scene where all the blood vessels pop in his eyes. Yeah, so good.

Yeah, it looked really cool. Yeah. So he die. And his dad, his stance, his dad's stance makes no sense to me. He's like, you k. You mean Nenry Winkler? Was it? Not quite Henry Winkler? Because Nenry Winkler? Oh, I see, I see. The wrinkler.

He's the fox. Yeah. It's just he, like, nobody's, nobody's anger at this kid makes any fucking sense. Yeah, it's like, it's like they live in the Middle Ages where everyone's just like, Witchcraft, witchcraft, he's a witch. Even Claire says he's not a witch, all right? I know, I didn't say, nobody said he was. I love that the water that had come out and made him slip slowly goes back into the pipe.

Yeah, that was good. Self-cleaning murder water. Yeah. Allie Larder, find Lartner, Clear, finds... Claire. Is at the house when Alex shows up to see what's going on with Todd, because he has a premonition about Todd. Yeah.

She's like... Oh, it's cool. You're going to get blamed, they're gonna blame you, and they do. And then he's like, I just gotta see the body. So they break into the mortuary. Through a skylight, a stained glass skylight. So I understand why for the film that there was a casket seven feet in the air that they could lower themselves down to.

Why would that be that way? I don't know. Why not just have them break in through a back door and walk in? It doesn't make any sense. So we're coming up on the biggest waste in this movie. T.T.T. Tony Todd is in this movie for all of three minutes. And it's super weird. He's great. He's very weird. There's so much like poor tent of like, oh, there's something else going on here. To the point I was like, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, th. T, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. T, thi. T, thi. T. thi. thi. thi. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. he's the embodiment of death. He's death and incarnate.

Nope. He's not. He's just the plot set or upper. That's fucking stupid. Like, why not make this, you've got like, like this dude who just like, he looks. He's candy man. Yeah, he exudes like, you you cheat a death and so death can be coming for you so you got to figure out the pattern. Like how would he know all this if he was really

just the funeral home guy? Exactly. I'm just around so many bodies to figure this out. The fact that he doesn't have any mystical powers. Exactly. Is just mind boggling? So I went on the, have you been a wicking pedia? I went on there and the Wickingpedia. Oh, for Christ's sake. Why is the internet so scary to you? I went on there and I was like, oh, well, I'll read about all the other final destination movies and see that he is death. Yeah. And he's just a reoccurring mortician character.

Yeah, he's in every one of them. But I was like, this is stupid. It would be so much more fun fun he was death and he's like, oh, I'm laying this out. Now beep. Yeah. Yeah. You know, and then he like disappeared or something.

Yeah. And then shows back up at the end. And then, the next movie. But he doesn't. No he doesn't. It's such a waste. Be my victim.

He doesn't even say that. Doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't. Clear. Clear. Don't say clear. I really hate it.

I'm feeling low. I don't need this is I'm feeling low, I don't need this death talk about Tony Todd's scene. I think this whole movie's just so morbid, like I know we're all gonna die. Yeah. I know. I like it because it's sort of joyfully morbid.

And that's sort of like my default setting. Yeah. I do have two notes earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier earlier here. When Todd's porn magazine goes to the fan, I have the note porn fettie. Deese. And there's the, when they go to see Todd's body, it jumps. Yeah. And Tony Todd's explaining to them that it's a cadaveric spasms when they're being filled with the fluid. And I was like, oh, thank you for naming my more to to to to the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, and the, and I, and I, and the, and I, and I, and the, and th. And, and th. And, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and the, and the, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the, the.. And, the. And, the. And, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. And, the. And, the. And, and. And, and, and, and. And, thank you for naming my more, my new Grindcore band, Cadverick Spasms. It's gonna look cool on a t-shirt. It really will. It'll be a bunch of blah-blah-er-won, you won't be able to read it. Yeah, but people who know will know. Yeah.

Yeah. So next, I think, I to fuck with that Mac daddy That's right. Which I have the next note jump jump And then the next note Tony Todd is death. This is the only thing that makes sense daddy Mac? Jump jump jump. Don't know. So yes, so we move on to Anger boy and his girlfriend, who in my mind was definitely Rose McGowan,

but is not Rose McGowan. But she is wearing a lot of butterfly clips. Yes. It's a little past butterfly clips, too, I feel. So, yeah. Maybe this one sat on the shelf for a little while. Maybe. They pull up listening to some god-dah-dah-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-a-fut-a-a-a-a-soeozylion. to-soe, to-s. to-soe, to-a-a-a-a-i-a-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-a-i-i-i-a-i-i-s, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to-s. I I I I's, to-s. I's-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-sa-s. to-s. to-s, to-s, to-s, to-s, to-s listening to some god-da awful Trent Reznor song. Yeah, really into that because in 2000 like jocks didn't listen to to Trent Resner slash nine-inch nails period. The only lyric I made out was he was like

it's the final destination. Do you think that was for the movie or do you think it had to be? Yeah? Yeah, oh man. Give me that money. So they're having an argument they they they they they they they they they they keep? They they they they keep. They they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they to to to to to to to to to took took took to took to to took to to to to took to to to to to to to to to to to to to to Vin. Yeah. Oh man. Give me that money. So they're having an argument. They keep having these instances where all of them are back together. So it was like the teacher who got off the plane with them and then everyone who's still alive that survived. Yeah, they just keep meeting up. Ends up at a coffee shop.

Yeah, anger guy almost hit because he is spinning his car around to confront Alex about nothing, confront him about what? He keeps me like, you're not in control of my life. Sir, it seems like anger is in control of your life. You know what I mean? So and he, so, what is that guy's name? Is it, Cater, is the agri guy. Carter just starts the last name? Carter the Unstoppable Sex-Sa? thine? thine- thine- thine- thian thian thian thi thi thi- thi- thi- thi- thi- thi-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-s, thu-o-o-a-o-o-s, tho-o-a, thi-a, thi-----a-hea-hea-hea, he's thian thi. He's to to to thi, he's to to th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He thi-hea, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-guy. Carter just starts- That's the last name.

Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine? So he just starts going off about how, I'm never gonna die. I'm not gonna die. You can't tell me what I'm gonna die. I'm never gonna die. And his girlfriend's like, you know what? I'm fucking sick of this bullshit.

I'm not letting you guys best scene in the movie. Yeah. Because it's totally unexpected. It's so good. I knew it was coming. I still jumped. Yeah. And I watched this movie with Rob who'd never seen it before. And I was like, just I knew he was going to delight in this scene. He loved it.

Lost it. He was like, oh, it. like. Sorry Rob. Yeah, like there's just the scene where she walks into the street. You see a premonition of a bus and a window. Yeah. And then she walks into the street and blammo and you just see this like spray of blood and she's gone. Bus just slams. It's so good. It's it's delightful. It really is. And that's when I'm like, oh wait I am back. Sure. And cadaveric spasms will be playing soon. Sure. Roboto, I heard. So like he starts figuring this out, right?

Yeah. But did he, I mean, like, did he ever figure it out in a way that made sense to you? Because I kind of just like, is no doubt on his explanations? No, he just like, he doesn't understand it. He understands it there's no like huh oh oh oh oh Because he's drawing this map of like the blast or yeah, I don't know the fuel line It's also he's drinking Alka Seltzer and what kid drinks Alka Seltzer no no one it's disgusting So he figures out that the teacher is next right? Yeah because he's lurking outside our house so casually, so? So the news, no the news, the news, the news, the news, the news, the news? the news? No, the news? No, the news? No, th. the news? No, th. the news? It's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi's thi's thi's thi's thi, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. It's thi's thi's thi's the the thi's the the thi's thi's the thi's the the thi, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the thi's thi's th that the teacher is next, right? Yeah, because he's lurking outside our house so casually. So the news is infatuated with this explosion, right? Yeah.

As they probably would be. Oh my gosh, yeah. Especially in our 24-hour news cycle. Am I right everybody? Also his family watches nothing but news, so yes. Very well educated. And very all in the pulse of America. So there the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the So there's the scene where they're like, actually, you know, it wasn't that kid who destroyed

this plane. It was like this faulty wiring thing. And here is a blast trajectory of how it exploded. And the map of that perfectly matches where everybody who is still alive was seated on the plane. Yeah, in like an order of operations here. So he just has to fuck with that plan this th th that plan that plan that plan that plan that plan that plan that plan that plan the the that plan the that plan the that plan. that plan. that plan. the that plan. that plan. that plan. that plan. It that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that is that is that that that that. It was that. It was that. It was that. It was that. It was that. It was that. It was that. It was that. It is that. It is that. It is that. It is that. It is that. It is that. It is that that. It is that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the the the the. It's the is the is the is thoooooooooooooes. It's the. It's the. It's the. It's that's that's the. It's that that's the. Yeah, in like an order of operations here. Right, so he has figured out death's plan. Sure. And so now he just has to fuck with that plan. I have the note that I like the use of harp in the soundtrack. There's a lot of harp, like interstitial harp of soundtracks. I miss that totally. Can we talk about the agents. Let's get into these agents that are following him. I think he said said the the the Asians. I said the Asians. I said the Asians. I said th th th th th said th said th said the agents. I said said said said said said said said the Asians. I said the Asians. I said th said th said th. I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said the Asians. I said I said the Asians. I said I said I said I said I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said I said. I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said. I said I said. I said I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said. I said, I said, I said, I said, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I the. I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said,, whoa, and also I don't remember any Asian characters. No Asians in this film. The one FBI agent is the only person of color in this movie, right?

And Tony Todd. And Tony Todd, yeah. Who's like, maybe a bad guy? They live in like a suburb, a suburb, a suburb of New York City. Yeah, they had Long Island. I guess that's pretty white. I don't know. I don't know. Okay. So let's talk about Shrek and who's the other detective? I never knew they had names. Yeah, the because I like the actors. Yeah, they were very clever I felt. Agent Wine and Agent Shrek. They are tracking this kid because they think he's got something

to do with what's going on and with these people dying because they originally ruled out that he had nothing to do with the explosion but now like everyone's dying around it. Which here's the thing like everyone who was on that corner saw the bus accident. You know what I mean? How could they possibly think he had anything to do with that? That's where the logic of this film just stops like he wasn't at Todd's house? the the the the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi's thi's thi's thoe. thoe. thoe. thoe. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. They's th. They's th. They's th. They's th. They's th. They's th. I the. They the. the. the. the. theeee. theeeee. thee. theeeee. the. the. thi. thi. thi. th logic of this film just stops. Like, he wasn't at Todd's house. He wasn't at Todd's house. You're right. He wasn't at Todd's house, and people saw her step into the street and get hit by a bus, which is like a thing that really happens.

So the teacher is leaving town. She definitely needs therapy. She like looks's also, did you not notice it was cracked? It's dripping all over the floor, you fucking lunatic. I don't know. So he figures out that she's the next one to die. So Alex is running to her house, and she's doing her vodka spilling routine. This is the most Rube Goldbergian of all of these deaths.

She dies like eight times. So, so, the order in which how things happen to her. She spills vodka into the computer monitor, which makes one of the diodes explode and then the screen explodes out of it. Does that, that's not how computers work? Don't know. And then glass shoots into her neck. Sure. computers work? She slips on her own blood. That's how blood works. The vodka catches fire that she spilled everywhere. Yeah. And then as she's bleeding

out and like slipping around, she falls and she grabs a rag and that rag is what she had thrown over a knife block earlier, dragging all the knives down onto her chest. Can liquor bottles really explode like that? I don't think vodka could. If she was drinking like grain alcohol, definitely. That is definitely flammable. I've started many fires with grain alcohol. Not many, but a few.

So yeah, it's like, it's a little ridiculous. It's a very overkill. She dies so many ways. So the kid sucks it not seeming like a criminal. He like pulls the knife out of her chest and just holds it and is like, e'er! And then runs out of the house to where Stiffler was it? Yeah.

Seas him in the street. Stifler's just like riding his bike everywhere. Everywhere you need to be stiffers there's there's there's their's their's to be stifflers there on his bike. And oh yeah, she's not dead when the knife block hits her chest, but then a chair falls and knocks a knife fully into her chest. Oh my God. It's like, what do you do? Just stop her heart, prop? It's just like, so inefficient.

John's William Scott reports that he's seen Alex there, and Lartner clear goes and hides him and her father's cabin which is five feet away from her regular house. The next note I have just says nobody gets me or my art which I guess is probably clear. She does like huge like modern art sculpture. Yeah, she's like, do you know what this is? This is a representation of you. Yeah, I like come on art girl keep your fucking feelings to yourself I'm so uncomfortable with people who express their feelings so openly Do you know what I mean? Oh, it's very uncomfortable. Yeah, and we then like leaning in for a smoocher with him, like. And then she's got some sad dad stuff and she's got some mom issues and she says things like, fuck

death. It's just like, yeah, okay. It's just like they're like suddenly everybody needs to have a backstory. I don't need to know her backstory. I feel like she should have been played by, who's the woman? Claire DeVal? Clea, Deval. Yeah, I feel like that, she should have played this character. Like, it should have been reprising her gotthea. Yeah, it really is that character. And that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their. th. th. th. they they they they the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thee. the. the. the. they're they're they're the. th right. And that would have been around the same time, ish?

I think so. Okay. So what happened? Oh, so they all meet up again? They just keep, well, okay, this is where things start to go up the rails for me a little bit, because he runs away to like a beach somewhere. They all have to get in a car to go get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to get him, to, to get him, to, to get him, to, to get, to, to, to get him, to, to get, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to get him, the the the the the the the the their. And, their. So, their. And, their. their. their, their. their. they. they. they they they they they they they they they all, they they all, they all, they all, they they all, they all, to, to-a so he's going he get there like it yeah yeah so they pick him up in anger guys car so now it's just anger guy Stifler clear clear and Alex are left and so they start to demand to know who's next at

least anger guy does and he determines that he's not gonna wait for death he's gonna take himself out by parking his car on railroad tracks yeah yeah dumb dumb and then then when he decides he doesn't to to the he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he to he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the he the he he the the he's not going to wait for death, he's going to take himself out. By parking his car on railroad tracks. Yeah. Dum-Dum. And then when he decides he actually doesn't want to die, his car won't start. But Alex has had this premonition of the seatbelt ripping, and he realizes he can rip him out of the seatbelt that otherwise wouldn't come unbuckled, pulls him, but the car gets demolished, metal everywhere. Yeah, and there's a piece just going, fop, fop, fufffufffah, fufffah, fop, fop, fffa, fffa, fffa, fffa, pop, check off some metal. And it spins up and fucking sweetly decapitate Stifler. Yeah, I really liked that. It was beautiful. You love. You love a behead. You th a fire walk. Fire walk, yeah. Fire walk is always going to take your movie up a notch. Yeah. The next one I have says was that cat food? Was he eating cat food?

No, he was eating deviled ham? Why? Because it comes in tins? Why was he wearing those gloves? Because he didn't want the metal lid to slice him and kill him? That explains a lot? th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi. Was th. Was th. Was th. Was th. Was that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. Was. Was. Was. Was. Was. Was. Was. Was. Was th. Was th. Was th. Was th. Was th. Was th. Was the the thi. Was he was the the the thi. Was the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. the thi. thee. thi. thi. Was thi. Was th lot. Yeah. I was like, this is just gone off the rails. He's eating cat food with gloves on. Like what? I just don't understand. Your mom didn't feed you deviled hand when you were a kid. I mean, I think I've ever had a canned meat. I have the note, God's not afraid to die? Why do I have that note? You know what? I think you were stream of consciousness writing that one? I don't that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I don't that I don't that I don't that I that I don't that I that I mean. I that. I that. I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. I th. I the. I th. I the. I the. I the. I th. I thi thi the. I th. I that one. I don't know. I don't know. And then I had the note, so now he's just battling death daily? Like death is just constantly fucking with him? I don't know, like it seems like death, I don't understand the rules by which death is playing. Like he realizes that he skipped over somebody so now somebody, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. From here it just doesn't make any fucking sense like knives are just like coming through the door at it and stuff and I don't know and then eventually they're at Claire's

house here's house and the scene is just endless talk about the scene with me do I have to I don't remember anything up from it. It's storming, because it's always storming in Long Island. Sure. And there's an electrical line that goes down. Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right.

That's right. For like 40 minutes. Yeah, it's so long. and he's got a he's like you're grounded you the electricity won't hurt you but I have to grab this thing so you can get out of the car right because there's a snake in the car I don't remember why there's not a snake cars on fire car's on fire she has to get out before the car explodes because the like flaming tank one underneath the gas tank right he has rode there by the way he has rode away. I love that dad's cabin is literally just across like a little body of water from the house. That's kind of nice though. It's like having a clubhouse. Yeah, yeah, for sure. My next note is what the fuck kind

of name is Clear Rivers. So you're at the credits now. Well, okay, so death is like seemingly so inapt. I can't get any of these stupid kids. And he says to her, I'll always be with you, at which point I actually bit one of my fingers off, because I was just so disgusted. And the electricity shoots him backwards, but does not kill him. Does not kill him. He should probably be dead. Yeah. He's not dead. The next thing we know, they're getting off a plane in Paris. Why? She's blonde. She's blonde. And she's blonde. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I I I th. I th. I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's thi. It's thi. It's thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I thi. I, she's cool. People like her. It's the same year, right? It's the Cleo of Duval transition from like, Goth to pretty girl. It's so gross. Yeah, I hate it.

Yeah. Now I have blonde highlights. So, I feel like they just took whatever wig she was wearing off. And it was like, I'm back to be back, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the the the, I, the, I, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th and, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, like, like, like, like, the, th, th, th, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to the. Yeah, this is my varsity blues look. They're in Paris and I really like the ending and they're kind of like it gets Rube Goldberg in again to the point of where like this giant sign is swinging down to take out Alex and it misses him. Because they're talking about how you have to be saved from death and he has yet to be saved from death so anger guy saves him. Right. But then they have this quick quick this quick this quick thagh. thagu thagu thagu thagu thagu thagu thagu thagu thi thi thi the thi the thi thi thi the thi thi thi thi thi the thi. th. thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi's thi's thi's thi thi thee. to to to theeeeeeean to this this theeeean thean theeean thi thi. thi. thi. thi. but then they have this quick exchange of like it didn't skip me it skipped you and then the sign is gonna hit it but like what was that all about it didn't give me skipped you what it was no it was it skipped me and now you're up again oh it's circular yes how did they

not how did they figure it fuck who know because he's just been thinking about it the whole time because he's got his little pieces of paper that they they they they they the they the they they the the they they the they they they the they the they they the they the they they the they the they they they they they the they they they the they they they they they they they the the the the they. they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they. they're they. they. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi about it the whole time. Because he's got his little pieces of paper that he was bringing out. They were like, oh God, not again. Oh, he was like figuring out death plan. Oh, right. Because he never switched seats. Right. Because those girls had asked him, I'm saying that like it's a realization that something makes sense. It doesn't make sense. Quite frankly, I don't think it matters. But I really like that the last scene is the sign just about to hit Anger Gow. And then the current roll with a Joe 90 song, I believe, is what starts.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yep. Sound trac's pretty terrible to this movie. So it says you. And then my last note is, that's a good ending. And then the tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thin thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, that, thin' thin' th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' song, thin' song, thin' song, thin' song, thin, thin, thin, thin, to to thin, to-s, to-s, to-s, thin, to-s, to-s. Moving on to the... It sounds like you're raiding. Yeah, I wish I could do a Tony Todd voice right now and say Rating Space. You want to try it? No, I can't do deep. I just have this nazely nerd voice.

Can you get in the lower? Oh, Boer. I like that you just pulled your shoulders around your ears. I'm lower. I'm lower. I'm totin Tony Tony. I'm tod Tony. I'm tod tod only. I'm tod tod tod tod tod tod tod tod tod tod tod today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm todd. I'm to to to go. I'm. I'm th. I'm to go. I'm to go. I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish I wish. I wish. I wish. I wish. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm t. I'm t. I'm tod tod tod tod tod today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to totally taught. No, that's higher. Oddly enough. Rating's face. Ratings face? Ratings face. There we go. That's all I want it. It always makes me cough. You want to go first? Nah.

All right. I can't if you want me to. I, this is another movie that I was annoyed with the first time I watched it in 2000, and I really had a good time watching this. Oh, that's great. Yeah, I thought it was a lot of fun and just stupid and like an original premise-ish in a time of like now that we live in the time of no original premises for the most part. Yeah. Although that's not true, there's a lot of movies, but there seems like in a their a stuff over and over. Sure. And yeah, it was fun.

I liked laughing at all their clothes. I enjoyed, there's just a lot of silly stuff. I liked that Tony Todd shows up and says some weird stuff and then leaves again. Because I was like, I wouldn't know how much you get paid for that day's work. I'd love to know. I hope it was a kingly sum. And uh... Enough for him to come back and do the other 27 movies or one over. Five or four sequels to this movie. He's in all of them?

Yeah. Tony Todd. Come, make that cheddar, dog? Did the X-Piles guys do the other movies too? Oh, that I don't know. I'm looking while you to talk. But yeah, I tho, I th I th I th I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho. tho, tho, tho, tho, that, that, that, to that, toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. th. is way higher than I expected. Yeah, I mean, and it's in an era where I'm not like super crazy about the movies that were coming out around this movie and it fucking... No, all the movies that we've done that have been around this one, I think you've pretty

well hated. Yeah, I even have the note, very 2,000 opening credits, in line with those dumb remake movies. Whoa. I'm so much better than everyone else. I'm such a fucking toolbag sometimes. But anyway. Oh, buddy. No, it was a lot of fun. I'm glad that we did this and I got to revisit this. This is one of the few, like, going back to it and being like, ah, yeah.

It's hel was super fun. Yeah. I love all the deaths and they really hit me as being a warrior and seeing how things can go wrong all the time. But they were so absurd. Yeah, I know. But that's what you want. That's what I feel.

Like, I'm constantly worrying knives out of the dishwasher or whatever, I'm like, don't slip, don't slip, don't slip. You know what I mean? I'm just a, and I have to walk two steps to put them in the knife thing, you know? I'm a lunatic. It's just, I'm just, I'm just really worried all the time. You know that, that thing in Ferris Bular, where he says, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, the, the, th, th, I, I, I, I, I, like, and I, like, like, like, and I, like, like, like, like, and I, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and I, and I'm just, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and I'm, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I the, and I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's true for me as well. And this is an era, I mean like I was a senior in high school for this movie. Like, so this is my generation of terrible fashion and bad haircuts. I think if you watch this movie as an X-Files episode, it's pretty good.

If you watch it as a horror movie, you're like, ah, come on. The deaths are great. The story is blah. that's thi I I thiiiiiiiiii. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thathea. thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheat. th. I th. I th. th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. This is th. This is th. It is th. It's is th. It's is th. It's is thee. It's is thate. It's is thate. It's is that. It's is thate. It's is th. It's is th. It's is the story is blah. Oh yeah, for sure. I think that's just, other than the concept, which is you cheated death, deaths coming for you. Great. But just the way they sorted out and the mystery, I just feel like they were like, we don't have Fox Mulder here to sort it out, we have to have Devonsawa do it. I think it's a mystery Yeah, there was no need, but other than that, I think it's totally enjoyable. And I think people should watch it, if only to see these great deaths. Yeah, for sure.

I will give it a... I'm gonna give it a seven also. Oh, nice. Definitely, yeah, I would watch it again. I might even watch some of the sequels. Can I still say final Dedstination? I was also saying final Glenn's donation? Of course you were. Not as good. And he was like, eh.

Also, I don't know if this was Google Play or what, but the sound in this movie was so fucked up. Did you have this problem? No, I thought the sound was fine. It was like, I felt like I couldn't hear any of the dialogue, but then all of the actions, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, the action, th, but, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, not, not, not, not, not, not, tho, not, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, not thi, not thi, not thi, not thi, not thi, not thi. Not, and thi. Not, not thi. Not, not thi. Not, not thi. Not, and thi. Not, not thi. Not, not thi. Not all my cats jumped up and ran out of the room. All of them, millions of them. Did you pause this movie at any given point? Probably? When I was pausing it, it would put a circle around whoever was on the screen at the time and tell you their name. I was doing like a pop-up video thing. Yeah, yeah. It didn't put a circle, thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. this this this this this this this this this this this this this this tho tho thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeaaauuauauauaua. thiauauaua. thia. thi. thacher or something the actress who played the teacher. Oh well mine was just doing like a circle

with their name like it was like Google Plus or something and I could friend them. What? What's it? Google stop it you're not you're it's never gonna no one want it though? What's that Katie? Cryptocarium? It's the parcel of terror? Yes. And right now you can th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the th the th the thi thi thi the the the the the the the th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th- th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the their the their the the's the parcel of terror. Yes. And right now you can get in on that sweet, sweet, sweet treat box. Sweet, sweet treat. Tell them about it, Alan. Jason McKittrick does a thing called the partial of terror. I love when you turn into NPR, Alan. I really do.

We've explained this to you one to million times at through your head yet. Yeah, yeah. Are you guys, pay attention. Yeah. Jason is doing these Halloween boxes. You can now subscribe for the Treat Box, which is the second in the series of Halloween boxes. It's part of the regular parcel of terror. You will be signing up for the regular parcel of terror with us. And if you've been dilly-dalling or a month. Jason does all these amazing, exquisite handcrafted pieces. And then there's art by other people involved in this and this dude loves Halloween. He loves it. He loves it. He loves it. He loves it. He loves it. He loves it. You're going to lose

your mind when you see this stuff. Lose it. Lose it. actually know what you're saying. Oh, Cypress Hill, the... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah! Huh! I'm embarrassed that, like, yeah. I think it's Send Dog, not Zen Dog. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, Katie's my hype man. My Heipman. And, uh, this is a if you listen to last week's episode, the one of the ring, we do a little unboxing and talk about all the amazing stuff.

We eat the candy. There's a crunchy, crunchy noises of Katie eating candy on Mike. Sorry, I'm a dick, but if you put candy in front of me, I just can't help myself. I ate like a whole package of mom buzzerlier. Last week when we recorded that. Mm-hmm. So, get in there, Cryptocurium.com. Katie, can you give me a little spelling on that one? CRY, PTO, C-U-R-I-U-M. Parcelain, get in on the treat box.

September 30th is going to be the cutoff for that. Yeah. And tell Jason that you're to try to to thoeeeekekeke month. Yeah. You're going to love them. And tell Jason that you heard about it from us. Yeah. Katie, say I want to get smart. Yeah. Some just kind of like dark and mysterious art. Dark and mysterious art. And, uh, you know, I want to support an independent artist and maybe I like punching in codes. Do you have anything for me? Yeah, you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to to to to thi, yeah, yeah, yeah, to say, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Katie. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, to say, to to to to to to to to to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, say, say, say, to say me? Yeah, you can go to Thomas Kincaid Gallery. There's probably one in your mall. Pick up Little Boy Blue. Yeah, it's just weird how the windows seem to be watching you as you go by.

If you don't want to go to Thomas Kincaid Gallery. And who doesn't? And who doesn't? And who doesn't? You you probably. Just go online to Dylan Garrett Smith.com, D-Y-L-A-N-G-A-R-R-E-T-T-S-M-I-T-SM-I-T-H dot. and click on his store and look at his amazing prints that are available for sale. Right now I'm looking at the Rise and Fall Screenprint, which is, look at it. Oh, that is gorgeous. I know you guys can't see it, thrown. I If you don't want to pay full price. What? I don't? Who wants to pay full price? painful prices for suckers. With Dylan's coupon code, discount code that he's provided for us. Specifically for us? For you guys. For you. You can get 25% off any purchase from his store using the discount code EMT 25.that's elephant manila teletubby 25 I guess

it's like also emergency medical technician or whatever what's this now 25 and you get 25% off yes it's such a good deal on beautiful pieces of art you're supporting an artist who is you know doing it and working for themselves and making those houses in the woods with the lights and and no, that's Thomas Kincaid, I'm sorry. You'll impress your friends. I'll be like, oh, you know shit about art. Yeah, and you'll be like, fuck yeah, I got this on sale. So, that's Dylan Garrett Smith.com, check out his stuff. You're gonna love it. Keep checking back because he's sold out of some stuff, but he's putting new stuff up there regularly. So get in there and buy stuff.

Yeah, it's gorgeous. Yeah. You will be happy you did. And let him know you heard about it from us, because you will with the discount code. Yeah. All of the above. What do we got? What do we got? Yeah. Well, I want to thank a few people who have given us iTunes. Please do.

The October Bear? That's cute. Candy Litch. All so cute. And Vanden Bros. Right. Right. Right.

thanks. Thank you. If you want to hear your iTunes name, read on our podcast. Please rate and review us. We would really, really, really love it. Yeah, this is episode 99. We're going to be doing our hundredth next week. Crazy. Yeah, and Katie, it's coming up on a fall time, time to wear, you know, like a t-shirt. Where can I get a t-shirt? Oh wait what? You should get our t-shirt? Oh, you should get a, you t-shirt it's a terrible injure to this that I just did. No I think it was great. I think it was great. You can get it by emailing us you can see what it looks like on our Facebook you can see it on our Instagram. Yes. Arts by Justin Gray it's fantastic. Yes. You can get it by emailing us at Gmail Famoulance at Gmail. Send us your address and pay-a-mai-a-a-a-a-tahe. to-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-I's tha-a-a-a-in-a-I's tha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. I th. I tha-t-tah-t-tah-tah-tah-tah-tah-tah-tah-ss. I tha-s. tha-s. tha-s. tah-s. to you. Mail that mothfogger out to you. And I'm probably going to be doing the mailing like once a week, so you might not get it

the next couple days, but you will get the shirt. This isn't Amazon Prime Babies. We don't have drones. Swiss villain on Twitter did ask about the teat shirt. There are a bunch of ghosts all over it. Thirteen of them, actually. And he said, those are ghosts, right? Definitely not Data's Dick. I didn't think about it, but now I will. Thank you. That is excellent. Next week is our hundred episode, Kate. What are we doing?

Are we going to tell them? Yeah, listen, we might as well hype it up as much as we can. Yeah. Get as many listeners, it's a movie that people are gonna want to hear us talk about because we're both probably gonna explode talking about it. Tell me. It's the Monster Squad. Monster Squad. You always thought it was gonna be the thing, didn't you?

You did, didn't you? You thought, We've always said, And then 104 is our two-year anniversary, so then we'll be in season three. Holy shit. Season of the Witch. So Monster Squad, you've seen it. You can find it online. It's around.

You probably own it, right? I have it on VHS. I want to give another quick shout out to Justin for doing the Dean Coons Rules t-shirt design. than it's amazing the Justin. to just. Just. Just. to. to. to. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. tha. I. tha. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thia. thia. thi. thi. thia. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. thea. thea. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thshirt design other than it's amazing that Justin made it. It really is. Do we have anything for mailbag? We do, although it's more of a visual one this week. Oh is it that piece of art that came to us on Facing Book? It's from a listener named Andrew. He says thank you for the podcast. I made a drawing for yins. Peace. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. th. A. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. th. th. th. th. A. Yins, yins is good. And it's amazing, it's like a Rat Fink style, like, werewolf on an ambulance. And it's on our Facebook, right?

I think he sent us a message of it. So we will post it on Facebook. It's really, it's really cool. Yeah, you're gonna love it. And then next week we're also going to post the scatograph, right? Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. to, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. thi. tha. thi. tha. thi. tha. tha. tha. th. So thank you for drawing this, Andrew. This is amazing. This is so, and thank you for Emily for doing the... It's just, you guys are crazy and I love you. Yeah, I can't believe...

Do you know that I love you? Do I tell you often enough? Do I tell you often enough. Sometimes I think I think I tak you, Andrew. And... Monster Squad, guys. Let's do this. Tell you this. Tell your friends. Tell you friends. Then we're going to burn this to the ground, right? This is the house I live in.

Oh, oh, fuck. I'm so sorry. Oh, God, you've already started the fire. Oh my god, well, the third one. Who that? She's an actress I like. She's real cute. This girl, you know her. This girl, you know her.

She's in a lot of period dramas. Oh, I don't know her, but she is real cute. Wait, doesn't carry a period drama? Pudmpht-t-t-oh, my god, I'm leaving. I'm not even raiding this movie. I just went home. Oh, God.