Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - From the Patreon Files: Surviving the Game

Episode Date: August 3, 2026

Babies, we're on vacation this week! You know who isn't on vacation? Ice-T. He's being hunted for sport in "Surviving the Game."

Welcome back to Patreon. Thank you for welcoming me. How are you? I'm not being hunted by Rutger Hower, so I'm doing pretty good. Could be better, could be worse, I would say. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, it's just the world.

Yeah, I think that's the problem. Maybe even just the country. I would accept just the country as the problem. Sure. Today, as we record this, is June 30th, which means the 4th of July is, is just around the corner, just around the river bend. Fuck you, Mel Gibson. Never mind.

You know, I have a strong feelings about Mel Gibson. I said, no Mel Gibson movies on here. And then Lucy was watching Pocahontas the other day. And I was like, is that fucking, is that fucking Mel Gibson. Speaking of things that are wrong with this country, Pocahontas, Mel Gibson. Anyway, as I was saying, I went to do my annual review of my 4th of July playlist. Yeah. America at the fucking beautiful.

You have a great playlist, yeah. Well, it's long and obnoxious. Yes. I went this year to remove Proud to Be an American by Lee Greenwood and replace it with cop killer by body count it's not on Spotify. It's nowhere.

Too controversial. It's on YouTube. Is it on YouTube? It is on YouTube. Okay. Because I had to listen to it then to make sure it was existing. The last I looked,

I thought you couldn't even buy a CD with it on it. Really? Yeah. I listened to it in the car on the way over on YouTube. It's great. Yeah. It's a great song. Yeah.

Yeah. So I'm going to have to rip it from YouTube. to my computer, upload it to Spotify so that when my family comes over for the 4th of July... Upload it to Spotify as a werewolf ambulance.

That will probably get us kicked off. Yeah. I have a playlist that's called Look for the Helpers. Oh, some Mr. Rogers stuff. It's all anti-cop songs. And I had a picture of Christopher Dorner as the photo for it.

And I was like, that's probably too much. That's a bridge too far, I think, yeah. One moment. I left the Sicy Light Mango behind me. Oh. I need it in front of me. Ooh, just got on your new couch. Salute.

Salute. Salute. Sulae, Mia Familia. What are we here to talk about? Oh, I thought we were just rapping about the state of the world, man. I did. Now I'm done. It's terrible.

Terrible. Speaking of cop killer and a man who got in a lot of trouble, for writing that song. Yeah. A fucking great protest song. Oh my God, yeah. Yeah. Time to get even.

The Mr. Ice-T playing an unhoused person in the 1994 classic Perry's favorite movie. Perry's favorite movie of all time. Surviving the game. With that wig, though. Which one? Why?

Rucker Hauer? No, Ice-T. Why are they doing this today? him. That we gave him Frankenstein forehead. Yeah. Well, okay. Let's be honest.

Yeah. He has been blessed with a very generous forehead. Sure. Sure. There's a lot of thoughts in there. If I was a younger woman, I'd call it a five head. But I'm not. I forgot how hunky a young iced tea was, though.

Really? Oh, yeah. I find him very hunky. Yeah, yeah. He's never done it for me. I think he's a little too dangerous for me. Just as a human being Just he's just too edgy

From what I understand He was never actually a gangbanger Nah He just hung with gangbangers He's a military guy isn't he He's a vet Oh I don't know Oh I'm sure of that

Yeah Yeah yeah Not to say you can't be both But you're not usually both Yeah so this is a movie About hunting homeless people Okay so everything that the person Anarchy did wrong.

This movie did so right. It's the microcosm rather than the macro. They're keeping it tight. You're also just like these people are fucking insane lunatics. They're not everybody, you know? It's shocking because it's shocking. You're casting a movie with lunatics. There's an actor you want on board.

It's Gary Busey. It's Gary Buccy. And he's doing his part. I was sad that he was the first one to die because I wanted to see what he could do. I would put money on. the cast being like, yo, can you...

Yeah. He doesn't have to be here the whole time, right? We're out here in the woods in what is probably Vancouver. Can you just... Can he just switch with F. Murray Abraham? I love the

like, the stuff that are like right off the bat they want to make you empathetic with iced tea. Like friend of dogs. Yep. Friend of old white dudes. Yeah.

And he's being watched by one... This is a movie with a lot of gentlemen who have to say their full names. Yes. So Charles S. Dutton. Charles S. Dutton. A.k.a. Rock from the TV show, Rock. Uh-uh. I don't know. I know him. I know I know him.

He's on a TV show called Rock. He was in jail for manslaughter. Oh, no. Was he hunting people? Maybe. Was it manslaughter? Something along those lines. But yeah, he's, I like when he shows up in things. I think he's a good actor.

Let me double check that. Hold on. I really don't want you defaming Charles S. Dutton. on here if that's not true. Charles S. You know who I will defame? Please. Stuart Copeland.

Love the guy. What? Why did they let him do the music for this movie? And what was he thinking? The music is insane. I definitely have a note that just says the music is bonkers. Let's see. After a knife fight, he pled guilty to manslaughter and was sentenced to five years in prison.

Wow. How do you get into a knife fight and have it be manslaughter and only serve five years? What's the situation there? You can probably make an argument that it's self-defense. If it's a knife, if it's two people involved in a knife fight, one of you may end up manslaughtered. Yeah, that's true.

A slaughtered man, if you will. That seems to be what happens, yeah. Bringing a knife to a knife fight and all. I didn't realize it's Stuart Copeland today. Stuart Copeland. Music by Stuart Copeland. The Stuart Copeland. Bringing it back around, it was in a band called Virginia Blacklund.

We had an anti-copes song called S. Copeland. Ah, about Stuart Copeland? It was just, it wasn't anti-the-police, it was anti-the-police. Really? No, it was anti-the-cops. Yeah, good. We thought we were witty. The only thing,

No, it is, it's okay. Honestly, the only good thing about the police is staying. Oh, not true. I mean, the police. See, I'm talking about Max. Macro police, not micro police, which is Alando's D' Moore. A fucking fantastic album. One miss, one miss.

What's the, what's the most? Born in the 50s. Oh, fuck you, Sting. I get it. He went on to have a magnitude of misses after that, so, I'm on the fields of barley. I kind of like that song. Well, you're a mom now. I liked it when I was a child.

Anyway, my immediate thought was, is he going to have to wear that wig the whole time? The answer's no, but it doesn't get a whole lot better. He trims the wig. The wig is just getting so wet in that rain scene, and I just felt so bad for him because it had to have been so heavy and gross, smell so weird and chemically. I would like to know the evolution of those dreads if he had those before he became unhoused, or if we're supposed to believe in the fiction of the fiction of the film. film. While he stopped caring about himself, he put very much care into his hair.

They are tight trends. Yes. The director of this movie, Ernest K. Dickerson, directed the film Juice and the movie Demon Night. Oh, all right. You might know Juice as the Tupac Shakur vehicle. I've not seen it. I've heard of it. My Favorite Hip-Up Song of All Time.

Juice, Know the Ledge by Eric Vien Rakhan. I think it's perfect for me getting to end. And it has the rhyming couplet of, They Set Me Up, They Wet Me Up, After He gets murdered, which I think is very good. That is very good. Because he's telling a tale about being murdered. Which is, you know, it's interesting.

That's good. But yeah, the director of Demon Night, So it wraps into horror films as well. Yeah, and things we talk about regularly without knowing much about them, which is my favorite hobby. We should probably do that movie at some point, yeah? I've never seen it. Me either.

Yeah. I've only ever listened to the soundtrack. Wait, does it have Billy Zane in it? Oh, I don't think so. No. Could it? Maybe. See, again, I haven't seen it. Tell me everything you know. Yeah, Tales from the Grip, Demon Night, starring One, William Zaintington.

All right. Oh, he's the collector. I have seen the movie because Jada Pinkett Smith is in it. Oh, okay. And you know I don't miss Pickett Smith. I didn't know that. Oh, Thomas Hayden Church is in it. I like him on wings. And CCH Pounder, who we've liked in things as well. CCH Pounder. Oh, yes.

Okay. That name that I didn't believe was a name. Dick Miller's in it. Oh. As Uncle Willie. Big Willie style. Yeah. Oh, man.

There's a bunch of women who are cast as only party babe. There's at least nine of them because one of them is party babe number nine. Boy. Yeah, we're going to have to do it. We're going to have to. We're going to have to. We haven't done it. We haven't done a Pinkett Smith yet.

She's also in Scream, too. Oh, that's right. We still haven't done Scream, too. Mingo, his friend who is a dog, get hit by a taxi cab and turns into a bag of yarn that he then carries away. Yes. Well, the taxi driver is yelling at him about wanting his fare, which seems insane.

And then, ice tea. Meanwhile, the whole time Charles S. Dutton is lurking in the shadows watching him. I did not notice that. Yeah. I'm very observant. So Ice-T and his buddy, what is it? Hank. Hank.

Go to steal some meat from a meat place. Yeah, from the meat store. Which they then encounter a security guard who gives them the business. He's a very, very tough security guard. And he finds a gun because Ice-T had found a gun. He goes, I got a gun, I got a gun with like very little emotion. Oh, he is terrible in this film. Which is crazy, because I don't think he's a terrible actor.

No, but I think this was still early in the game for him. What year is this? 94. What year was Lepricon in the Hood? You know that off the top of your head. 2017, I think. No. No.

How dare you? After this, I'm for sure. Lepergan in the Hood. No, before you look it up, does you already look? No, I'm just on Ice Tees, Wikipedia. Give me a guess what year that movie came out. Lep in the Hood. come to do no good.

Keep in mind this movie was 1994. 94. I'm going to say that was 98. Oh, we were worried about all the computers shutting off.

Really? Why 2K? Year 2000. Wow. Man, I wish they had. That's a terrible movie. That's a terrible movie. No, he was fantastic

in that movie and I will hear nothing to the contrary. And he's been on law and order for like 30 years at this point. For sure. for sure.

So yeah, they go and steal the meat, they have a confrontation with the security guard, he starts beating the shit out of them, and then we see that Ice T's a good fighter.

He's got good fighting skills. He's a good fighter and he's also insane because he's screaming shit like, let's all die and I'm gonna shove this up your ass. I mean, he's a man who works with words. Yes, that's true.

Meanwhile, there's like sad clarinet music wafting all over this scene, which then as the scene changes, turns into like optimistic base mall 1920s music. When they're grilling the meat that they've stolen from the aforementioned meat plays. And it's just like, Bada-a-bum-ba-bba-bba-bba-da-da-leap.

Yes. Yes. Beal-de-le-leap. Beal-de-leap. Bip-a-le-leap. You're going down to see the pirates at Exposition Park. I don't know when Forbes Field opened. I don't think yet.

Yeah, they're playing the Homestead Grace. Different leagues. I know. I know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. you knew? You're looking to me like, fuck you, I knew that.

Hope said grace were in the Negro leagues, right? I know, but I just didn't know if you knew. I watched the X-Files too. What does it have to do with the X-Ils? There's the baseball episode where the alien team are the Grays and their uniforms were based on the Homestead Grays. I have no memory of that. That sounds like something I would remember. Stewart! I feel like he was like, oh, can I do the music for it? And they were like, yeah, you're a fantastic drummer.

And then he's like, here's what I got. And they were like, oh, no. Oh, fuck. No, my computer just went to sleep and that's the music. It makes when it goes to sleep. Oh, no. So they wake up and, uh, iced tea says, God's still constipated.

And then he's like, Hank, you've got to get up. Hank. He sits up and he goes, another fucked up day. It's like, we're like, we don't need to say it out loud. We know it sucks to be unhoused. But that sounds like he might be beginning an iced tea song. So I was like, uh, no. It's true. Okay.

Yeah. So Hank's dead. Hank's dead. He says, you can't die on me, Hank. But I already knew that Hank was dead because he was shaking him and he wasn't moving. There's a lot of iced tea telling and also showing. Earlier Hank had said, Hank has two jobs in this movie. Yeah.

Ice T finds the gun. Hank says, always check the barrel of the gun. If it's jammed, it'll blow up in your face. That's right. Chekhov's jam. Mm-hmm. second thing he says is I'm not going to die until you're doing okay in this world. Yeah.

And he just dies the next day before I-T is doing okay in this world. Such a fucking lie. You can't tell people you won't die before they do something. Sure. You can't do that because then you will immediately be dead. Final destination. So, Ice-T has given up on life at this point. He's lost his best friend.

He's lost his dog. In the same day, or at least same 24-hour period. Yeah. by a like food bantering that Charles S. Dutton is working at. And Charles S. Dutton chases him down and is like, hey, hey, I want to help you. Ostensibly over giving him a free lunch. Yeah. Yeah. They're both, I think, in the scene doing a nice job with relatively shitty dialogue. Sure. Because they're yelling sort of like cliche things at each other about why won't you just accept help and no one could help me. But I thought they were both being very, I thought they were both very compelling.

Yeah. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is for sure one of the better, like, scenes of Ice Tees acting. Absolutely.

I am so really terrified that I'm going to slip up and call him Ice Cube. Yeah. I would do Anaconda again, by the way. Charles Dutton is like, we should do,

fuck, what's the, is it, Ice Cube did an action movie, Triple X. He did one of the Triple X movies. There's more than one. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. I think the first one is Vin Diesel and the second one is Ice Cube. Okay, let's only do the second one. we've given Mark Sinclair enough of our time in my opinion. So Charles Sondon is like, hey, I've got a job for you. We'll need a survival guide. Right.

Which is insane to think that you could be hired for that. He's smarter than this. It's like if someone came up to be like, look, we need someone to be an IT executive. And I'd be like, you know what, I'll do it. Yeah. Yeah, I like that. So he goes to Hell's Canyon, Out. While they're playing like wistfully panning for gold music, which is just insane.

You need a job naming library music tracks. I know. If that were a job, see someone offer me that job, I'd believe it. I could get it. No. They'd be like, we need you to teach kids out of dunk basketballs. And I'd be like, all right. I can't do that.

Sweet Georgia Brown. So who does he meet at Hell's Canyon Outfitters? Fucking Rutger Howard. You like Rutger Howard? I fucking love Rutger Howard. I think I love Rutger Howard. You've seen Blade Runner. Yes?

Yes. If you don't love Rutger Hauer after seeing Blade Runner, I don't know what's going on with you. I mean, I was going to say if you don't love Blade Runner after seeing him as Lothos and Buffy the Vampire Slayer of the movie. Of course. Go to fucking hell. Of course. Yeah. This must have been not too,

they must be pretty close to each other. They're both 94. Yeah. He made four movies in 94. His hairstyle is very similar. Oh, wait, this was 94? Yeah. Oh, it's not on his filmography.

Oh. On Wikipedia. Is this the movie he doesn't want to admit to? This must be selected filmography. I think it's 94. What is my information? Yeah, 1994? Yeah, it's not on his filmography.

Weird. So he did a lot of movies in 90s. I mean, he did. Oh, no, he is. It's here. I just didn't notice it because it's purple, because I've clicked the link. I wish I was dead.

I'm glad you're not. Oh, brother. So Rutker Howard got the direction of, just be evil now. Just be evil now. I think he's doing a great job of it. He's such a good bad guy. He's eminently hateable.

He has that super punchable face. I really like him. And in this movie, he very briefly has a bird, which I think makes him such a better bad guy. having that macaw or whatever it is. It briefly turns up into a bond villain. It's great.

I don't even know what that means, but I agree. Why doesn't the bird come with him? I was so disappointed that bird doesn't come back. He's just petting it. He's petting the bird. I love that Rutger Hower's facial hair and head hair in this movie can easily alternate between, I don't know, mid-century Dutch painter and biker dude. He's a very Van Rinn meets.

Hell's Angels. Yes. Agree. He's also a man that I... That's a rat brand. He's also a man that I find very attractive. Yeah, would. Wood, wood, wood, wood, wood.

But yeah, he is so like, I'm just going to ooze evil right now. Yeah. Is that okay if I use evil? Yeah, if I'm just a bad, bad dude. And he's like, yeah, we don't actually need you because you smoke and we need people who can do cardio. Yeah.

And, uh, and, uh, uh, uh, iced tea says, oh, you got one of them running, things. And I was like,

you don't know a treadmill? I mean, that's insane because I don't think he's been on the streets very long. Two years. Yeah. You knew what a treadmill was before that. Running thing. Running thing. Like, the movie can't decide if he's smart or not. He's very crafty. Right. But it also...

Right, but also not that long. I mean, two years is certainly a long fucking time to live on the streets. Sure. But you don't forget a treadmill, I don't think. Running things. Maybe back in 94, that's what we called him. Maybe. So he Rucker Hauer pays him an advance and he goes to

stay in a motel where the proprietor is straight out of the 1970s. I do not understand what this man is doing. He's like straight out of Dolomite. It's like just black exploitation cinema. Oh, yeah. So he goes to the hotel. He gets like a bottle of hooch.

Hooch, yeah. Meanwhile, the music is now like sleazy noir jazz like Picard on the hollow deck kind of thing. And then it's briefly flamenco sketches from Miles Davis when he gets in the tub and you're like, wait, that's a real song, I know that song. It sounds weird

having a real song in this movie. And then in the tub he takes a razor blade and cuts off some of his dreads. He should have cut off more of his dreads like perhaps most of his dreads. Arguably he put them in a worse place because it's harder to put him back in a pony.

Yeah, there are his eyes now. They're like dread bangs. That's got to be tough to deal with as a bang. Hanghaver. Have you thought about dreading him? You think I should? No.

My next note just says, look at those cargo pants and then I want to know what that goat is doing today. I wish we would have stayed on him a bit longer. So I was smoking weed, I guess. What goat? There's a goat. They show a goat at one point just like galloping across the plane and I was like, what's that goat doing here?

What's he going? Where's that goat going? I love goats. Goats. At no point up to this point have we seen Rutger Hauer or Charles S. Dutton say, I'm sure they have names in the movie.

At no point did either of them go, so we're going to take a plane. But they put him on a three-passenger plane and he's like, okay, yeah, yeah, that makes sense. This makes sense. Yeah, yeah. They take two planes to get there because there's a posse.

Yeah. Who flew the other plane? Um, one of the other rich people. Okay. Okay. Maybe an F. Murray Abraham. Yeah, maybe. I like F. Murray Abraham.

Who doesn't? He's great. It's fucking Salieri. Yes, right. He is Salieri. Or a John C. McGinty. McGinley. McGinley?

What is he do? He is wild out of the gate in this movie. As soon as they show him, he's doing crazy eyes, and you're like, fuck, I'm here for it. Now I wrote, the music is building tension to what I assume will not be a jump. No, it wasn't. They send ice tea to get some beers. He comes out with what I think is Moosehead. I was like, oh, they're in fucking Canada.

And also my bloody Valentine. Oh, God, what's that dude's name? Which one? The guy from My Bloody Valentine that everybody wants to be or be with. Jensen Ackles? No, no, not that one. Oh, it's like Harris or something. Is it Harris?

I think so. I thought you meant IRL. So there's also Gary Busey and William McNamara. Is William McNamara the kid? He's the kid. And I know him because his first film role was in a Dario Argento movie. We've not done yet. Yet.

I hear the word yet. It's on the docket. All right. I find him to be very badly cast as the son. of F. Murray Abraham. Why, they look at a lot of like. A jeanful. His mom must be a real

different looking person from F. Murray Abraham. A real wasp. Is that way? Yeah, that's what I'm going for. Anyway, Johnsey McGinley is so much fun in this movie.

He's a Texas oil man. Yes, he is. Also, F. Marie Abraham's character is named Derek Wolf and he's a Wall Street executive. Derek is the son, but yes.

But they're both, Derek. It's senior and junior. Oh, right. You're right. You're right. So he's the wolf of Wall Street. Yes, he is. He's the most feared man on Wall Street, we're told. And I thought, but why? There's nothing. F. Murray, Abraham, don't take this the wrong way.

You're fabulous. There's nothing about you that makes me afraid. Nah. When you're being tough in this movie, I'm going, ah, F. Marie Abraham. That's sort of John C. McGinley, too, is you're like, No, you're funny. You're funny.

Even when he's staring at Ice Tea, just doing that, like, over, like, I'm a kill you face. It's hilarious. He's super buffing this movie, though. He's got guns. So fit. Yeah. I didn't realize he was such a big guy. He's really tall.

Yeah. Because Busey is real tall, too. Is he? Yeah. Yeah. I don't like to believe that. I want him to be small. Like a lumbering of.

He played Buddy Holly. It seems like the weirdest casting in a fit. Oh, yeah. Wow. There's some story that I heard about, you know, in more recent years, like, somebody mentioning that they liked him as Buddy Holly. And they mean, like, I'll come back to the trailer. So they go back to the trailer and he just sits and tortures them by playing Buddy Holly songs and singing to them. What?

And they're like, well, I'm going to go. One more, one more. Oh, man. Oh, yeah. Well, on this, he's a weird old, rich white guy. and they sort of skirt the weird old rich white guy thing by having a black guy and a young guy and you're like, oh, I see.

It's not just weird old rich white guys. It is. It really is. This movie was surprisingly subtle in its racism for being a movie about a bunch of white dudes and Charles S. Dutton hunting a black man. Yeah, I agree with that. I feel like if this movie was made now, there'd be N-bombs dropping all over the place.

I agree. It seemed a lot more about class than race. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not that the two things don't go hand in here. but it seemed like their issue was with him just being poor. Oh, so they brought a pig with them as well. Right. And any reasonable person at this point of all the weird shit they're doing and the way Johnson McGinley's looking at him,

the fact that they're just carrying around this pig, any reasonable person would be like, what the fuck is happening here? But they sort of excuse him, the film excuses iced tea not noticing it by his being homeless. Yeah. Which is like,

it doesn't make you stop. stupid. It does not. You know? He seems to be like extremely trusting of anyone who wants to give him a helping hand. But he does also just did not want a helping hand. Yeah, for sure. 30 seconds earlier.

Right. I just, I find that whole bit of him being smart but stupid and wanting help but hating help. Kind of bleh. Yeah. Yeah. And there's the whole thing with like, there's a locked door when he goes in to get the beer and he's like, ha, wonder what's in there.

Oh my God. I thought it was going to be weapons. When you really opened it, I laughed so hard. So I've never cooked a full pig. I don't know if you have or not. I've witnessed it. Okay. It's not a quick process from what I understand.

No, it's an all-day affair. So seemingly they kill a clean and cook a pig from the time that they arrive in the afternoon. Late afternoon slash dusk. To dinner time. And it's delicious from what everyone's saying. They are all going to. going to get worms. So they ask,

Mason is iced tea's name. They ask him something about what, I don't know if that's the worst thing he's ever done or something like that. He says he killed his wife and daughter. And John C. McGinley fucking flips his shit and it's great. And he's just screaming, You're fucking mine tomorrow, which is great. And they haven't revealed what's happening yet.

No, I mean, you can guess, but you know, he's still like, well, I guess I guess I'm. I'm here to be a wilderness guide. Why? I'm a survival man. Yeah. There's the scene where another scene that'll make you think that iced tea is stupid. F. Marie Abraham is like, so, how do you like the wine?

And he's like, oh, it's pretty good. He's like, it should be for $4.50 a bottle. He's like, $4.50 a bottle. I should have gotten two. And then he says it's $450 a bottle and he spits the wine out. Ice tea. Yes, he's so stupid. Oh, it's so dumb.

It's so dumb. He's not that stupid. But also then someone asks him how that made him feel when John C. McGinley was shouting at him and he just goes, I came in my fucking pants. Sir? So weird. Sir? Then we get the scene.

Oh, my God. Where Gary Busy is describing his childhood trauma. Can you do all of it in its entirety? I just got out all of my teeth. She has so many. I have so many fewer than he does them. How does he have so many? Where does he put them?

I don't know. It ends with him fighting a bulldog to the death. The dog that he loved. He loved this dog more than anything in the entire world. Raised it from a puppy. This is wild. When he's doing the thing where he's like, my dad told me that I had to throw M80s at the dog.

So I would light one up and I would light it and go, boom! He would like, do the loudest boom you've ever heard come out of a human being. Yeah. But the rest of the time he's just talking like this. Yes. And it was like, oh, I made him a butthole clench every time he did it. It's so, like, terrified. He's a scary man.

He's a very good actor. Is he not kind of scary in real life, though? Well, I've never spent any time with him. Oh, yeah, but you really like Buddy Holly songs. I think anybody's scary if they're punishing it with Buddy Holly songs. So we learn that he's a psychiatrist with the CIA. Yeah. And we learned that Charles S. Dutton and Rutger Hauer are both former CIA.

Yes, right, right. And that this whole hunting expedition is Gary Busey's idea. Oh, I missed that. Yeah, yeah. So they toast him for coming up with the idea. I see. They're all drinking out of Peter Goplets, by the way, as well. Oh, yeah, they are.

Meanwhile, the son, Jr., is just like, That's Stuart Copeland's fault. Yeah, that's true. That's true. So they're like, yeah, don't get too drunk. You're going to need your wits about it. Meanwhile, they're all getting hammered. Right.

Yeah, they keep telling him he's going to need to be like on it. Yeah. Johnsy McGinley says to him, I want you so bad. I can taste it. And I was like, you're going to fuck him. You're going to fuck him. I'd watch it. just for a little bit.

I don't need to be there the whole time. Sure. Let's see what it's all about. So he goes to sleep where Rutger Howard takes him to his bedroom. He's like, here's your bedroom and have a good night's sleep. See you in the morning. They'll kiss on the forehead or whatever he does. Tucks him in.

Give him one last smoocheroonie like you have to. And then Charles Lestutton wakes him up by cocking a gun at his face. Yes, they have flipped. They are so mad. They are so going to kill him. They tell him that he has the head. head start of them eating a nice leisurely breakfast. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I would have asked what they were having. Yeah, to see how long it's going to take. I mean, if they're just having like yogurt with some granola and then it's not going to take long. Or you've got like the mid tier like eggs and bacon, but it's like if you're making pancakes, I can do this. Yeah, I've got some time.

You got to get the waffle iron out? What's going on over there, Rucker hour? You got mixed or are you doing this from scratch? Because like, yeah. I'm pretty fast. It's just like, oh, the fucking beautiful outdoors, right? Like, no, it's deadly. Again.

Again. It is very beautiful outdoors, though. Yeah. Yeah. I'd go for hiking those woods. I'd look at a postcard of it. I'd do a jigsaw puzzle of it. Would you ride a dirt bike and or ATV through it?

Hell no. Okay. No. Hey, roots are out there. You've been in falling logs. So he takes off running and then falls down and goes, I wish I never started smoking. Doesn't stop smoking at any point in the movie.

No. Continues to smoke. And the kid is like, we're not really going to hunt him, are we? And it's like, what did you think you were coming here for? How was this explained to you? Your dad's the most feared man on Wall Street. The literal wolf of Wall Street. The literal wolf of Wall Street.

But like the son's hesitation is why the purge is a stupid concept. Sure. Because normal humans have a moral compass. Yeah. The sun's also beautiful. Yeah. So that might have something to do with it. Yeah.

Beautiful people are less likely to murder. It's true. Is that true? statistically? I don't know. Look into it. How many uggos are murderers? Get in touch, beautiful people.

Are you murderers? Let us know. So yeah, they chase them down with some ATVs and dirt bikes. They've all got ear pieces, which are such a rich bad guy thing. And some of them are wearing like expensive hunting clothes, which I appreciate it. Like a junior and senior both decked out and like they're going fox hunting. Yes. Meanwhile, John C. McGinley is wearing like a T-shirt and overalls. I feel like he should probably not be allowed to participate. It's clearly not good for him. We find out that he has recently lost his daughter. Yes.

Who was murdered, assuming by a black man. I think so. Yeah. I just feel like if you're out there and he's your friend, I don't know. This is a pre-Dick Cheney shooting that guy in the face world. But like, I still wouldn't want to be in the woods with John C. McGinley and a gun. even if he's my friend. Sure, he's insane. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. He thinks he sees iced tea and shoots up a bunch of trees. Yes.

Which they all laugh at him for. Yes. It's like the man with a gun. That man with a gun who's clearly wild. Yeah. Yeah. But they're all kind of crazy too at this point. Yeah, I guess so.

Ice tea doubles back to the house. Yes. They say no one has ever done that before. Really? No one? Really. That would be the first thing you'd think of, wouldn't it? Yeah.

Yeah. And he dumps gasoline all over everything. Well, this is after, I'm sorry, he first busts the lock open and goes and finds a bunch of heads in formaldehyde. They all have names under them. And we're looking at all of them. And then we get to his and it just says, Mason. No last name.

No identified. Just Mason. So what is the cashier at Things Remembering think they're doing with those engraved nameplains? Yeah. This isn't a pre-internet world. Like, we have a fantasy football trophy that gets passed around, and I've had to put names on it such as Coxuckington who won one year. But I get this from Love Your Pets.com.

Okay. Yeah. Okay. They had to go buy those. You worked at Things Remember. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I did. Do you ever get to engrave something like that? Mostly flasks.

Yeah. Yeah. Mostly initials? Yeah. Ever anything funny? Yeah, not that I remember. No, you can too much. Wow. You would remember it.

Things remembered. We have a garbage memory. That's why I was fired. More like he's forgotten, huh? Hi-o. I'll show you motherfucker some therapy. Yes. Is the thing that Ice-T says?

Yes, because they describe this as their therapy. Yeah. Here comes Gary Busey. And house is on fire. And he's just kind of running into it. Yeah. No, get down and scramble. He's also wearing his fucking jacket with fringe on it.

Yes, he is French. which I think is the next phase of your fashion movement. Of course. Of course. Yes. Turquoise fringe. And while the cabin is burning down, the music is like just shredding an axe so hard. Just like, whew!

It's intense. I can keep going. Into adding tension to this thing. Yeah, I guess. It isn't. So F. Murray Abraham gets stuck in the house because he's a dummy. He's clearly the one who was meant to die in the scene and they just subbed out Gary Busey to get him out of the movie, right?

Because everyone was like, no, can we not anymore? I absolutely think that's what happened. Good call. Because that whole dog scene wasn't in the movie. So then Gary, you see like, busts out of a door and attacks iced tea and they have a fight and an ice tea throws him back inside. And then the house explodes. Yes. Yes.

He literally throws him back into the building. Yeah. Yeah. And then he runs out into the woods into what I think is a wolf. Yeah, that's a wolf. Yeah. Okay. wolf what's a wolf that looks like a collie so i don't know you know the dogs are descended from wolves

yeah do you know that and ice tea goes hey man we're cool everything's good and the wolf's like yeah yeah no we're good yeah he's like i smile you you're a dog guy you're friends with mingo right oh i'm sorry to hear about his passing oh i hate it when he turned into a bag of yarn and then he has to jump into a river. Right. Yeah, but he's riding the rapids. He does the cigarette trick where he has been given a pack of cigarettes by Gary Busey, and he lights them and sticks them into a tree so that they'll follow the smell of the smoke.

So smart. So smart. See, he's not stupid. He knows what a treadmill is. The running thing. The running thing. John C. McGinley's jeans are so tight. and it's actually amazing that he can bend his legs. Yeah, there was no stretch dead at that point. No.

He is giving like strong Tom of Finland vibes. I don't know what that means. He was an artist that like drew dudes with big dicks and tight pants. Okay, tell me more. That's about it. Okay, good to know. I'll bring up a picture of the Tom of Finland drew. Doot, do do do do do do do do do do.

do to do do do do do do do do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do he's a Finnish artist yeah that's the kind of thing in the Tom of Finland oh did he how many balls does that man have well it's two balls and a dick yeah I guess I can see that yeah it looks like those pants would be very painful around those huge ass balls yeah so I think Janssey McGinley felt hiding in a tree. He is. And how does he take out John C. McGinley? He jumps down out of the tree onto him. This is the first time we see his like a point of view of iced tea coming down at you.

Boots first. It's first. It happens again later. It's his signature move. It's very good. And then he just starts hitting Jonsie McGenley's head into the tree. Yeah. I like that a lot.

I love that a lot. Mason, you're a sack of shit. And we've also had F. Abraham describe him as a nothing person, a worm. Yeah, he's the worst. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, they go, ice tea takes McGinley to a cave on the side of a mountain. That's not the same place they go and find him in later, which is very funny.

It is very funny. And truly, there's no reason to not just kill him. Why is he keeping him alive? Because he's supposed to be the good guy who's not just going to kill people. And he should have killed him. I mean, he just killed Gary Busey. Yeah, but that was everyone requested that he do that. That's true.

Yes, yes. I forget what I see says, but Johnson McGinley says to him, of course you are. That's your kind. Yes. And I see he's like, you're the one who's been out here trying to kill people all day, which was my favorite line of the movie. And he gets on the communication device with the rest of the guys. He's like, if you don't give me a plane with Rutger Howard flying me home, I'm going to kill him.

And they're like, okay. Do it then. You won't. Yeah. And like, every. Everybody in this film, John C. McKinley's like, yes, please just kill me. I want to die. Yeah. He probably ought to get therapy. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Probably not the murdering kind of therapy. So he, how does he end up back with his friends? They find him? Yes, because back to Ice-T being stupid, he leaves a flashlight on in the cave so they could see exactly where he is on the side of the mouth.

Right. That's very stupid. You would just take the flashlight with you. Sure, and turn it off and you're not using it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So they find. John C. McGinley and he's like, I'm going home. I'm going back where I belong. The ranch. Because Ice-T shows to him that he's not a bad dude. And he tells him how his wife and daughter died. Right. Because he was the super in a apartment building. And he just didn't get around to fixing something. And the apartment burned down. And the apartment burned down. Yeah. And John C. McKinley's like, oh, you're not actually a murderer. No. And then he shows him mercy. Yes.

So Charles S. Dutton puts a fucking bullet in John C. McGinley's head. Yes. As he's walking away, shoots him from behind. And Derek has now lost too many sanity points. And he's going to have to roll on a table. And he might be eating dirt for the next several rounds. Yeah.

But it's a great scene because John C. McGinn is like, oh, what are you going to shoot me in the back? Yeah. And Rucker Howard goes, no, I'm not. Yeah. And then Charles S. Dutton shoots him. There's too many initials in this movie. It is true.

I like how they have like a real bromance, the two of them. Yeah. Yeah. I know we don't say that anymore, but I do. They're like BFF, FFF, F F F F F Fs. At one point, I thought they were going to kiss. I wish they would have kissed. Yeah.

Yeah. I would like them to be a couple. I think they'd be cute. Very cute. Back to Smart Ice Tea, he leads them into the water, but he has doubled back on them again. Yes. And gotten to their ATVs. But they're also like, they get part of the way into the water and they're like,

this just doesn't feel. right. You're like, come on. Well, they've hunted the most dangerous game before. That's true. They have, if that room was to let us know, there were a number of, a number of heads men. And we also saw them hunting someone at the beginning of the movie.

Oh, yeah, we did. That guy looked like he was wearing a mask or something. He looked so strange. Yeah. I like that the one guy whose head was in from Outahy just had like the Fuman shoe. Yes. It reminded me of the head room from Richard. turn to Oz, like the momby heads where she could trade in and out.

And I wondered if F. Murray Abraham was in there just trading them. What are those things called the wheelies? The wheelers, yeah. The wheelers. So scary. So scary. Was that the first movie we did for our pandemic bonus movies? I think it was.

That's how I ended up with Disney Plus. Oh, I see. And then that has ruined my entire life. Tell me the plot to The Little Mermaid, too. No, don't really. I don't know. I'm just joking. I know how that movie tortured me.

I mean, I'll tell you. Sorry you don't want to actually know. She vows revenge. And Ariel and Eric have a daughter, Melody, who doesn't know that her mom was a mermaid. And King Trayton, her grandfather, has given her this necklace with a seashell so that she'll always remember the sea. But then, never mind. Does that crab show up and sing the song? No.

Why would you watch the movie then? Well, he doesn't sing a song. I don't think he has a song. At some point, there's like a penguin and a seal. that are like the new animal companions. And they seem like they're from a different movie. And then they're gone. I don't really know how it ends.

So no one says, Under the Sea. No. But in the live action version of it, Shaggy played Sebastian. Shaggy the rapper. Shaggy, the rapper. It wasn't him.

I love Shaggy. Shaggy! Fantastic, Mr. Boombastic. Stuck in my head at least once a week. Oh, God. It's so good. I remember the first time I heard Shaggy speak. And he's just like, hey, I'm Shaggy.

You're like, but no. So that's like a, you're just putting that on? Shaggy, also a vet. Thank you for your service, Shaggy. As we come upon the 4th of July, like to thank Shaggy. And iced tea for their service to this country. Mr. Fantastic and the cop killer. So, ice tea, back to,

being smart again, puts a starter wire into the gas tank of an ATV. Yes, I didn't know you could do that. I didn't either. But it makes sense. It's going to make a spark. And so Charles S. Dutton hops onto the ATV, starts it off, and blows his fucking legs off. This movie is so wild.

That part is so good. And this is where you get this intense scene. I thought they were going to kiss. I thought they were going to kiss where Rucker Howard bends over and he's like, he's like, I've got to say good night or goodbye to you or something. Good Night Sweet Prans, basically. And then does this with his fingers, which is crossing his middle finger over his pointer fingers.

Yeah. And he sticks them on the arteries. I don't know why I said it like that, the arteries. No, it's archery. The arteries of Charles S. Tutton's neck until he dies. Is that a real way to kill somebody? Oh, Katie. Of course, it's the way the CIA kills everyone.

Oh, okay. I don't know. I mean, I know you can knock someone unconscious that way. Sure. Not knock someone. You can make someone unconscious that way. I mean, that's what is. sleeper hold basically does. Yeah. Okay. I guess I can kill them. Yeah, but you have to,

you have to put fingers over other fingers to do it to get the extra pressure. I'm glad to know that. You get to push one finger with the other finger, because the power of one finger is not as much as the power of two. But as the famous saying goes, power of two fingers is going to make anything happen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then there's a fight between the junior and senior. Yeah. But the, but juniors has something like, I'll help you find him and maybe kill him. But I'm going to be really mad at you about it. It's like, I'm never going to forget this dad. It's like, what the fuck are you talking about?

Like later when he's like, you know what? Fuck you. Fuck you, dad. Fuck you dad. Fuck you dad. So then I see his knees all fucked up and he's trying to run away. So he gets to a gorge. Oh, yes, he's been shot.

He says, oh, it did go in. Okay. And he has to get across this gorge. So he uses a shotgun to cut a tree down. Unbelievable. It's really going to let them know where you are. Yeah. But he doesn't cross the bridge that he's made by the tree.

Again, back to being very smart. Very smart, very crafty. At this point, it's like, is it day or night movie? You have to decide. No, they don't. You have to. We can't decide for you. When you're that far north, the cycle is just so fast, so fast.

Every 13 seconds. Got it with a nightmare. So Rutger Hauer goes across the tree. And then Junior starts cross. And I see starts throwing rocks at Rutger Howard. Very funny. And Junior slips. Yeah.

Dad's running across to get it. Junior. And then Junior falls to his death. Yeah. And now they're going to get that son of a bitch. Now if Marie Abraham is really mad. Really mad. Now you're going to see the real wolf of Wall Street.

Yeah. One of them yells, look Mason, I got no gun. And then immediately fires a gun. What are you talking about? That is so funny. Most is funny is when iced tea falls down that hill. Which you know they had to do an ADR later. So they were like, no, more ows, no more ooze.

This time more ass. Mr. T, no, tea, iced. Tracy? Tracy, we're going to need you to come in here. So Rucker Howard gives F. Murray Abraham a talk about like, you just got to be a good hunter. You just got to be a hunter and you got to wait and be quiet and wait him to come to you. And F. Murray Abraham's just screaming on.

but he's like, and I'm, I'm going to go over here for the night. I'm going to wait over here. Well, more shredding music plays. It's just shredding. But it's like real quiet, shredding. Yeah, it's like really fast, but the soundtrack's not that loud. And F. Murray Abraham sees something running around in the woods around him. And that's when he yells, I don't have a gun and then shoots a gun.

Immediately. Immediately. Meanwhile, Rutger Hower is just putting on makeup. Yeah. It's like putting on camouflage. I thought that was Ice-T putting on the camouflage. Well, they both do.

Oh, they both do. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Calling back to Gary Busy, killing the dog. Yeah. Ice-T breaks F. Maria Abraham's neck.

Yes, he does. Just like Mozart did. And then there's an ATV chase. Yes, there is. That's exciting. My next note just says, shooting your own plane to own the libs. So I don't know.

Because Rutger Howard blows up. up one of the planes and then flies the other one away. Okay, yeah. And he blew up that plane to blow up ice tea. But you can't take ice tea out like that. He hidden some dirt or something. Yeah, there's like this holy choir, Christ-like music with his resurrection. It's insane.

It's so silly. It's so silly. Now we're back in the city. Seattle. Seattle. Three days later. Was he living in Seattle the whole time? Whole time.

All right. Yeah. And it was definitely very. Vancouver. Yeah. At least they didn't make the like, at least they didn't try to set it in New York and be like, this is the Adirondacks. Like, at least they were like, look, we know.

It's the Pacific Northwest. It's not that one episode of the X-Files where they're hunting the Jersey devil and there's mountains. Like that doesn't happen. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Not in that part of Jersey for sure. Was it Jason takes Manhattan where they sail from New Jersey to Manhattan and there are mountains in the background?

Uh-huh. Love that fucking movie. terrible moving. Well, first you got to go through Vancouver. Yeah. But he does punch that one kid's head off into a dumpster. That's true. And that did spark our mutual love of bone thugs on Harvey.

So cut to Rutger Hauer dressing up like current day Stephen Segal. He's got a priest look. He's got a ponytail. Yeah. He's dyed his hair and beard and eyebrows black. Yes. and he's getting an answering machine message from F. Marie Abraham's wife, who is British? British.

British. And he's pretending to be a Russian priest. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And then he gets haunted by Ice-T. Yeah, this is the second POV of Ice-T's foot coming in hot, you know?

And then he just starts biting him. How did he get back? There was a motorcycle, because you see the motorcycle parked in the alleyway. Oh, okay. And Rucker Hauer walks by the motorcycle, and that's when he gets the gun out. Got it. Because he realizes what's going on. All right, thank you.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Yeah, and then he tries grotting him with a rosary. Yeah. I was like, they can't be that strong. They're not. Yeah. You could break one as soon as you pull on it. He seems pretty good in hand-to-hand combat.

Yeah, for sure. Yep. finish the game. Game's over. Bang. He kills him with the Hank knowledge. God. He stuffs a cigarette into the gun and then when Rucker Hauer goes to shoot him,

kills himself. Yeah. And we have just survived the game. I loved it. What about you? It's a joyously stupid movie. It's a joyously stupid movie with like way more competent acting than it. it deserves.

For sure. Than the script deserves. You got fucking F. Marie Abraham on this thing. How? He's a real guy. He's a real actor. But there's so many initials.

F. Marie Abraham, Charles S. Dutton, John C. McGinley. Yeah. Ice tea. You got it. Shush. Junior and senior.

Can't do it. No. So that's surviving the game. We did it. Oh my God. What a movie. I hope you're happy, Perry. I hope Perry.

happy too. We did this one for Perry. Yeah, this is for Perry. Yeah. And Kason. Yeah. Yeah. But mostly Perry.

Yeah. He loves us that delightful voicemail. Yeah. Boy, we got our first drunk message. It's pretty good. It's either drunk or real sleepy, but voiced it. Because when you get a Google voicemail, it just gives you a text version of it. And it did not understand what this person was saying at all.

So if you want a booty call us, that's where you do it. 412. 407, 7025? I believe so. God damn, and I hope that's right. Let me call it real quick. I also want to throw it out there that if, let's say you're out on a night on the town, what you say?

412, 407, 7025. 7.25. 412, 407. 7.025. If you're out on the town and some dude is, like, bothering you for a number, give him this voicemail. Give him the world. voice mail wait what do people hear when they call it i don't know oh my god i'm calling it hold on

do we get to record an outgoing message probably i just haven't done that yet so yeah call our voicemail leave us a message yeah or leave us a message anywhere you like we like to hear from you you guys are the best we'll figure out what to do with this like let me call on specific topics or something yeah um or just call us when you're drunk yeah yeah yeah yeah or call us when you're sober or call us when you need a friend yeah we're not going to be but any answer right away But we're listening. We're like Frazier. We're listening.

Woo. That's it, really? Yeah, I don't. Woo! Now it's gone. I cannot believe you got so close and you've given up. I can't, woo. Woo!

See, she's so good at it. You do it again. Woo. Come on. Put your back into it. Woo! That was better. Now you're breaking into DMX territory.

Oh. Thanks for listening, everyone. Oh, bye. Bye. Bye.