What's Your Drama - Ben & Jen's Divorce Drama and Do Breaks Ever Really Work?

Episode Date: April 19, 2017

Welcome back to the Sasha Answers podcast!On today's show: What's *really* going on with Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner. Well, we don't know for sure but we're really good at speculating. We also dive into the mailbox to dish out advice on whether or not taking relationship breaks is really a good thing and how to stay sane when your best friend is f-cking your ex.We are also featuring a new segment called" Sasha's Spotlight" where each week I'll be hitting you up with brands that are doing cool things in the world. Today I feature, CNCR SCKS!Thanks again for listening and keep your questions coming to me at [e-mail] or tweet us at @sasha_tong and @laineygossip. And head over to iTunes and Google Play to download the podcast!S.xx  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi, this is Lainey and welcome to the Lainey Gossip Podcast with Sasha Answers. Hi, Sash. Hi, how's it going? It's good. Yeah? Well, I'm automatically in a better mood because you just worked out. It's actually quite annoying because every time we do this, it's a reminder that I'm not working out, but you are.

I wasn't going to say that. I was actually going to say that it's getting so warm out that I'm, I have like, I am in love with clothes again. Oh, okay. You know, at the end of every season, at the beginning of every season, you're like. You're so excited. You're so excited. Fall clothing.

Like, you know, right around like August, September, you're like. You want more turtlenecks. Right? Turtlenecks and like long jackets and great pants. And then fucking by February, you're like, no, January, I am over this turtleneck. Like, no more sweaters. That's it. And then now, so I'm really into, not that that's, like, that's so fucking deep, I know,

of me. Like, oh, I'm so excited. It's summer, so I can be, you know. Well, it's not even summer. It's like 13 degrees out. But, okay. That's nice that you have that. I am going to hell, and I'm going to tell you why.

Oh, Jesus. Okay. I realized this today that I feel so bad about what just happened, like, a couple of hours ago. So, I was leaving work, and, you know, I haven't had a phone for a week. so I and I just got my new phone today so I'm like I've kind of forgotten that I've had it but without the excuse of that that that is like the base of the story but anyway so I'm walking to go to the parking lot and this woman this lovely Italian woman with like a very deep Italian

accent comes up to me she has her stroller with with her baby in it she's like do you have a phone I need a phone and it kind of like I was kind of thrown off because it was like kind of frantic I was kind of like scared because she was like really panicky and I didn't remember I had a phone. I was like, no, I don't have one. She's like, oh, my phone is out of batteries. And she brings out her phone. She's like, I need to get ahold of my husband. And I still didn't give her my phone. Did you forget that you were phoneless? Like, I mean, I did for the set. Like what I said when those words came out, I don't have a phone. And then it dawned on me, like after I like finished phone, don't have a phone. I was like, I have a phone. But then I just like felt really

weird to pretend that I was like lying. Yeah. Like, and it would be weird to explain. Like, Oh, no, I just only said that because I actually lost my phone, and then it would be like… And, like, who cares? She's fucking frantic. And then all of a sudden, her Italian husband runs around the block or, like, comes around the block, and it's fine. It's a happy ending. It's a happy ending.

But I'm the biggest cunt that I couldn't help a woman who was obviously in distress with a child, and I couldn't even suck up my own shit to be like, oh, you know what? I actually do have a phone. Who gives a fuck about my backstory? This is total karma because three hours prior to that, I ran into you in the hall and you had just picked up the box for your phone. It was still in like the whatever container it comes in. And I don't know where you were taking it.

Oh, yeah. And you were like, you know, you were sauntering down the hall and you were like, oh, I just got my new phone. And you were like sad, like closing the era of you being digital free. Yes, it was the best. And, you know, almost, you know, like, your, you know, your hippie, like, your hippie free way of, like, judging, like, now I have to be back with, like, the brainwashed masses and that, like, week I had of, like, mental enlightenment. Okay, go on, go on. And then, three hours later, you actually were so mentally enlightened that you had brainwashed yourself into not being a charitable person.

I feel disgust, like, I felt disgusting. Whatever. Okay, I know. It was an honest mistake. It wasn't like you were just a jackass who was like, I don't want to give someone his It was 50-50. It was like, I didn't mean to, but then I meant to. Anyway, if there is an Italian woman today that is listening to this podcast, my apologies.

Any Italian woman. Any Italian woman. I'm sorry. So I wanted to talk to you about, you know how last week we were talking about me looking for nail polish? Yes. And lots of people sent in their suggestions on the perfect silver nail polish. I'm sorry to say, thank you so much.

I don't want to seem ungrateful, but like, honestly, all the suggestions, even yours, Sasha, the next day where you were like incessantly sending me link after link after link and I had a complaint about every single one. There cannot be any dusting of sparkle. I'm sorry. And even the ones where people were like, there's no sparkle. I could see the sparkle. I gave up

I like when you kept on just coming back with like I think I see a shed of smear of sparkle I was like meh

over it just I like cut off the fucking email chain I was like nope can't help you but you found the one

that you wanted yeah but I I realized during the week that I should have the right explanation that I should have given about it being wet

is Terminator you know how in Terminator have you seen the Terminator of course okay so you know how they like dissolve into

just liquid metal that's what it needs to look like okay anyway apparently there's this brand that has spent three years

trying to perfect the perfect perfect perfect they say they're the first ones the first one and they spent three years

it's not on the market yet but they had like an Instagram or a photo of it and it looked pretty fucking close to what I'm looking for but there's no launch date

but we'll keep on that yeah we'll keep on that my thing right now is I know you've heard me talk about this but because it's getting warmer yeah

And our clothes are changing. Yes. And so you and I are both proponents of this, is the low side tank top. Oh, it's my fucking fashion M.O. Yes, for the summer, right? Yes. I don't understand why people wear tank tops where the under armpit part is like close to the armpit.

Yeah. Like it needs, everybody, the best way, it needs to hang. Like hang a little bit. Yes. Um, but that has made me so happy that I only wear sports bras. I'm going to flash you right now. I just bought a new sports bra. Is this what the black and white is happening under?

Oh, oh my God. It's, it's Ivy Park. That's amazing. Yeah. Um, I. Are you planning to wear this on its own? This Ivy Park? Um, no.

Okay. So Ivy Park has two, like a two camo sports bras that are awesome, that are like, would be awesome under like a low side tank, low side tanks. And then, but you know, if you can't get them and they are on sale right now, so that's why I bought them, but there's a store, like when you go to discount stores like Winners or Marshalls, they have a whole athleisure sports bra section. Most of my sports bras, and they're the cutest and they have great cute backs and different colors they're $12.99 I just got four of them and are they all Ivy Park no they're not Ivy Park at

all I just I'm Ivy Park was on sale this weekend okay so I got a couple from Ivy Park but I'm just saying that like yeah if you don't want to spend 25 or 39 or 45 on your sports bra like Nike sports Nike sports bras are like $70 oh yeah they're a total ripoff um just go to the fucking like winners or discount stores or whatever um ross i think is the equivalent in the u.s i think target has a really good cheap sports bras like i don't now i just want to find like open back can i see the side of that sports bra yeah because this is what i was going to say i okay right so this is a great option and the back is a racer yeah so sorry yassic for the sound but i'm turning around while stripping she she is stripping which is just really nice for everybody

here. Yeah. I was going to say that the low slung tank is great and some people feel a little bit sheepish wearing it, but the way that you have a sports bra underneath, it really covers any kind of like non-flattering area of the side back. So it like covers it up. So people shouldn't be afraid to do that. I don't wear. Or you can just wear a tank. Well, I wear a low slung tank, but I wear like tiny tiny little string bras underneath and if you want to go that route my favorite is I get all my bras from Aritzia they're fucking rad yeah and that is you know you can get that anywhere in North America online and they're like 30 bucks and they're really pretty and then you just have like a tiny little string on the side of your yeah of the side anyway but I've done it

with like other like I've layered a like a you know a camisole tank or whatever under the low rider uh tanks and it's and then it's a great look on its own like a tank on tank yeah anyway so excited for good we're not quite for summer i don't know why you're talking about summer we haven't even quite ready for that kind of situation yet but soon yes um so both of us kind of want to talk about ben affleck and jennifer garner because i think we get a lot of questions about why do women stay a hundred percent and why do they stay when there's um you know it isn't for sure but infidelity or when there is like a an actual addiction problem whether that be gambling or drinking or drugs yeah which is like check check check for ben affleck and then like to say

nothing of the whole nanny issue which yeah there seems to be a celebrity nanny cheating epidemic Like, not, okay, I exaggerate, but Ben Affleck, Gavin Rossdale, Jude Law had a nanny situation. There's somebody else. Well, which begs the question, I don't understand why, I don't know, is that really horrible of me to say, but like, I don't think I would be hiring some cute little fang to be coming into my house, taking care of my kid. That was kind of, do you remember that scene in Sex and the City 2? Did you see it?

It was shit. It was a horrible movie. I think I've blocked out of my mind. But Charlotte has like an Irish nanny and they, I don't know, the four of them are sitting and having brunch and the nanny comes running towards them in slow motion and her tits are like flopping around and Samantha, and she's like 25 years old, and creamy and luscious. And Samantha at the moment is like taking her hormone pills to stay young and to still be able to fuck.

and the look of horror on her face. And that's the exact conversation she has with Charlotte. She was like, honey, why would you have a nanny who looks like that? Sorry, who, what impression was that? That was Miranda? That was Samantha. Samantha. Honey.

Okay, okay, good. But so there's all kinds of like, I feel like people out there who are writing to us have these conversations or having these kinds of, What do you make of the Ben Affleck situation and what that marriage was and dating a guy like that? Could you? Oh, I couldn't. I would be exhausted.

Mostly because he's been kind of a jerk face for, I would say, up to two decades. You know, even when we think, I remember, so when I was Tara Reade's assistant back in the day. People want more Tara Reade stories. I know. And they'll come up naturally, but this was one of them. When she was in Vancouver and I was her assistant, she went out one night and it was when Ben Affleck was with Jennifer Lopez.

Do you remember this? Oh, yeah. They were in Vancouver. That's when he got busted at the Peeler Bar, right? Yes. And so this is it. Okay. Oh, my God.

Tell me everything. You better not spare details. Well, I don't really remember because she was probably high on coke when she was telling me this too. So it was like very piecemeal. Okay. And not allegedly because girlfriend was doing a lot of blow during that time. But anyway.

So Tara Reid was also in Vancouver. And she was partying with Ben Affleck and Christian Slater and all these people at this nightclub. And she didn't mince her words. She came back and was basically like, Ben Affleck was like, fucking, like there was a girl all over him. And it was a really big scandal because like, what the fuck are you doing? You're with Jennifer goddamn Lopez and you are fucking some side piece on the side in

like in front of people. So I just feel like he's been a mess for a really long time. Yeah. And then, I don't know. I just, I don't know. I wouldn't, I would be fucking exhausted. And, like, you know, cheers to fucking Jennifer Garner for putting up with it, letting him fucking sleep in the coach house and all this shit.

But, like, he's been given, he's been given many chances to figure some shit out. And he hasn't. Clearly, he has not. But you're right about the fact that, like, that stripper, like, stripper story, those allegations. I mean, we were living in Vancouver at the time, then it was all over the tabloids, and Jennifer Lopez still stayed with him for, like, a few months after that, but they did break off their engagement, but they were still together, and then he and J-Lo broke

up, and she, like, within, whatever, five months, had married Mark Anthony, and then he, not very soon after, also started dating Jennifer Garner. So, if you're Jennifer Garner, and they had known each other from, like, that Daredevil movie, if you're Jennifer Garner and you're, like, watching what he did with J-Lo and then, okay, he breaks up with J-Lo and then you guys get together and he's calm for a while, in the back of your mind, are you like, well, he just needed someone like me to, like, chill him out? Yeah.

And I've been like that. I've been that girl. I always think I can save my boyfriends. I feel like so many women are like that. Yeah. And I have successfully done that before and I have also failed at that many times as well. and maybe that is what Jennifer Garner

was hoping like she would be able to finally fix him but as we all know you can't fucking fix somebody they gotta fix themselves yeah

especially someone he seems like he is such like he's all about self-sabotage because he goes as I've written he goes in this cycle

where he's like fucking I was down people wrote me off Gigli whatever and then I'm gonna come back

and he did he became a director and like gone baby gone and Argo and Oscar and he was like essentially completely redeemed, right? You're stable. You've got three kids. You know, you win an Oscar and then suddenly it's like, hey, nanny. Yeah. What's up? And yeah, but back to the hot nanny thing. I mean, I get it. Like there are people listening who are totally pounding their heads on their keyboards or against their phones or against the

dashboard if you're listening in the car and they're like it's so anti-feminist to like reject a woman based on her looks for the kind of job she can do and i totally understand like that's where that's where it's like we're torn we're both like you know it's i'm torn it's only anti-feminist if it's like a total blanket statement which maybe i made but but i take that back because it's you don't put you don't put that you don't dangle a goddamn carrot in front of someone when they have a fucking addiction to carrots and that's what it is, right? Like, I would think that I could hire a fucking attractive, like, wonderful, intelligent woman if I had a kid as a nanny and, like, Corey would be fine. He would behave. But if Corey had, like, a fucking sex addiction

and was, like, a fucking cheating motherfucker, then no, I wouldn't bring in a hot fucking piece of ass. Right. Oh, you know, here's one I forgot. It's Arnold Schwarzenegger. Oh, fuck, right. Had a kid. He had a fucking kid. I think that also it's more than just the looks though it's when and I guess it could apply you know what let's not restrict it to like the women like just the men and the female nannies I

mean I actually think it would be the same situation with like a woman and a male nanny or a woman and another female nanny like whatever or a man the thing is is that it's not just the physical attraction, it's that you essentially share a home and part of a life with this person. So this is someone who is helping you raise your kids. So they're in your kitchen. They're in the basement. They are day to day. You're getting to know them. You are getting intimate in a way. Yeah, you're supporting each other. That's right. What is more intimate than somebody who comes into your family and is looking after your children and so when that kind of intimacy mixes with physical attraction

that's where it's a little bit like i think that that's where these things can happen yeah that's but i am i do feel torn because i don't want to be that asshole who's like you know our site we stand up for women's rights we like we don't want to judge and yet human nature is complicated And when you bring in feelings and personalities and lives and intermesh them with just straight horny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So what are you hearing?

What's like the latest on Ben Affleck and Janet Garner? They filed at the same time, so far without lawyers filing with them. So they're trying to give the semblance of, listen, we're still really good friends and we're going to co-parent. We don't want our kids growing up one day reading all this shit online. So we're going to present it this way to the public so that everybody knows. But I mean, like, can you imagine the serving of whoop ass that she… For sure. Like, because, you know, she is the sweetest and, you know, if you, I don't know, if you

like kind of relate it to Big Little Lies, she's a little bit of Reese Witherspoon's character too. You know, like the best mom and shows up for the school run. But don't think that Jennifer Garner doesn't have like edge. Like that Vanity Fair interview proved it. Oh, I love that Vanity Fair. Where she can cut you. She redeemed herself in my eyes.

She can cut you and you'll bleed out before knowing it. And she's like driving away smiling and like everybody loves her. So I don't know. I feel like she, I feel like she's got him somewhere. Oh yeah. And they're showing good face. And that's what I think people should realize. Like all this like consciously uncoupling shit.

Like let's get it clear. Like it isn't easy for these people. Like, and especially for Jen and Ben, like, they are totally playing us by, like, going to church and, like, laughing in each other's eyes. Bullshit. Bullshit. I hope that they, I have no doubt that they will co-parent really well and that they'll try to have some semblance of friendship. I totally, I stand by that. But the game that they're playing right now is, like, really transparent.

You're not buying it. Fuck no. Fuck no. especially from you know you broke the news that he was had just come out of another rehab stint she's gonna be fucking pissed supportive but probably a bit pissed probably not wanting to like laugh in his face as they exit the church doors well i mean i don't know like i think that she is the one like she's gonna be his biggest she was for years she's been his biggest fan and his biggest supporter so i think that like he definitely would need her to like be there and

be like listen I got this go look after yourself get right and we can deal with everything later and ultimately I mean this is the the fucker of it is that that is the father of your children you also don't want to fuck him that bad yeah and I'm sure he's not like an awful human being he just has some fucking demons that he hasn't really really worked out yet thank you for sharing your Tara Reid uh ongoing um being Tara Reid's assistant stories I know I should come up like I love that you just kind of dole these out sparingly like little crumbs and everybody's like, what else do you have, Sash? But yes, I do appreciate that you're saving them and leaking them out, you know, at strategic

times. So are we ready to, are reader questions? Yeah, fire away. Okay, so here's the first one. Hi, Sasha and Lainey. Okay, my question is whether or not relationship breaks exist and if they can actually be a beneficial thing for two people. That's kind of related to Ben and Jen.

I started seeing a guy, actually nine years older than me, in his 40s a little less than three months ago. He asked me to hang out and I told him on our first date I was looking for a relationship and he said he was on the same page as me. I just wanted to be upfront about where I'm at. The first two months were amazing. We took some weekend trips together, told our families about one another. We both live far from home and just generally fell in love very quickly.

We were dropping L-bombs after two weeks. It's a priority for me to find a partner that's fun and active and with whom I share interests, and we had all of that, plus an intense physical attraction, so everything was great for a while. The only problem for me was that maybe once a week or so, he wouldn't get back to me for hours. This progressed into not getting back to me all day a few days ago, plus not contacting me at all yesterday, to which I told him was very hurtful and strange.

I went over to his place this morning, and though he cooked a nice breakfast, he barely looked at me. He was puttering around getting ready for a bike ride when I finally got him to stop and talk to me. He basically said that we felt off lately, that I've been fussy, grr, that's her saying like grr in brackets, and that we're not having fun anymore and that we should spend some time apart, that he does love me and doesn't want to fully break up, just take some space.

I know that ultimately I decide if I'm single or not. I'm just trying to sort through my feelings about this break. I do agree that we moved too fast and that we felt off for a few days. I also do love him, but is a break actually beneficial or is it just the coward's way to break up with someone by softening the blow? Should I just get back on the Tinder horse? Hmm. Okay.

Well, I mean, this is maybe not related to Ben and Jen anymore, but a lot of people thought that like, because it was almost two years between them announcing that they were breaking up and then them actually filing divorce papers whether or not it was like one of those break separations and whatnot. All right. I mean those two of those things that she mentioned in her letter are two of the things that I always think are a red flag a getting hot and heavy and like wanting to say I love you within the first two weeks or couple of weeks okay I did that with yes yeah yeah but wait then not

and then coupled with the fact that there's the pulling of the plug and then they start to like disintegrate from your life and then all of a sudden want to break those together no bueno right like that I that to me is a recipe for um a breakup for sure yeah like he's go on sorry yeah feelings about this yeah for it was like the gradual pull out right first not getting back to her for a few hours then a whole day then a whole day then a few days yeah then not looking at her and then fussy and maybe we should take a break yeah yeah and that's kind of the trouble too when you get like all lovey-dovey off like in the first two weeks you almost set yourself up for like perfection like so that when there is a little bit of a down slump then you're like oh this isn't

good it should be perfect you know like you see that in relationships all the time as opposed to if you go slowly then you get to see everybody's fucking bad moods and like ugly behavior but then you temper it because there's you know good stuff in between there right there's ebb and flow but when you, like, fucking put the pedal to the metal and it's like love, love, love, love, love, then you almost don't prepare yourself for the dips in displeasure. I feel like celebrity relationships operate like that. Yeah, and that's why they're fucking over in a heartbeat. Like, right now I keep talking about Selena Gomez and The Weeknd.

Oh, that's going to end in disaster. You think so? Fuck yes. Like, I, you know, because it's, I mean, it's not just them. It's also because they work in different spurts, right? Like, you know, for the most part, most of us have nine-to-fives. And you can't be like, let's go to Paris, you know, in the first fucking week of our relationship.

But they have all this time and all this money and all these resources, so they're like big experiences. Like, some people have to save… I've said this before, but I really am obsessed with this point. A lot of couples have to save years before they can go to Paris or they can go to London or fucking Hawaii or whatever. And these people are doing London, Hawaii, Rome, Paris, Singapore, Japan in like one year or six months.

And then, and then like, what do you have to look forward to in year two or year three of your relationship? I mean, I think that you can go down fast if both people are on the same page for sure. And I'm sorry to bring this up again, but again, if like really you are learning each other's love languages and I know I brought this up last time and everybody has a love language, but like, I mean, I can say that Jacek and I went down fast and haven't looked back and I don't know, we've been together a long time. 16 years in November will be marriage and I think 17 years, fuck, it's too long, I

can't remember anymore. But, and so I feel like if it didn't work out now, nobody could say, well, you guys got together too fast but it was because both of us were actually ready i think that unfortunately in your case reader i think he said he was ready because let's face it it felt good but uh this to me this to me is yeah i don't know that this is like a like a break i think that this is just a warm-up to a breakup yeah like he just doesn't he's too weak to be like i'm out and also like too selfish

like I well I don't want to cut her off completely because because I don't know what I have around the corner

yeah yeah I yeah this this is I don't like the sounds of this like I just don't

like and you know what you're right like you and Yasik there's lots of people who hit it off quickly and and you know

stand the test of time but I just feel like there's like an age difference here it's only been a couple of months and he's like pulling back already

like that that shouldn't be happening Especially in an early relationship, things need to be moving forward, not backwards. And fussy, like, I don't know. That sounds like he's being too precious. Yeah. I don't know what fussy is.

So should you get back on the tender horse? I mean, I'm not sure you should get right back on the tender horse, but I do know that I don't know if you're going to be able to follow this advice because, like, we've all been there where we're just tempted to keep going back and going back. But if you can follow this advice, don't call him. Like, it's, like, for all intents and purposes, it is over. And I will warn you, he will call you. Like, there may be a possibility where he's like, what, fuck, she's not calling me?

Like, is she not thinking about me? Or I'm bored or I'm horny or, you know, I'm tired of my hand. You cannot go there. See, I think that's good if you have the kind of heart like Lainey does that you could just turn that off and it would be over. For me, I would confront that shit. I would be like, hey, buddy, no, I'm not into a break. But if you are, that means we're breaking up.

Like, I think you, and some would say that's an ultimatum, but fuck, it should be. It's either you're in or you're out because that's where you're at. You want a relationship, a full-on relationship. If he doesn't want that, if he's a little bit iffy, then he, then fucking cut him loose. I don't know if I, in this situation, I believe in the ultimatum. Like, that's what it is, right? And he's already been like, I just need a break. so you know what like but then you but I don't know what she said to him after that right so I

think for if she hasn't communicated she needs to say if you want a break then that to me is a breakup like I don't want her to go for the break and see how it goes like don't try the break no I think we're both in agreement that don't try the break but when I read this again he says to her uh we're not having fun anymore and that we should spend some time apart that he does love me and doesn't fully want to break up. Just take some space. No, no, no. Like you can't love somebody and then not want to like communicate about what's not working. Yeah, totally. Do you know what I mean? Like his first instinct was break before, hey, let's sit down. Yeah. And work again on our love language. Yeah. And so this guy is, and so what I'm saying is, is he's already told

her what she needs to hear. There's no need for that ultimatum. There's no need to go to him and be like, hey, I'm not doing a break so you either want me or you don't. I think that he's made it pretty clear that he doesn't want her because if you love her, then why are you breaking from her? It's just hard. It's hard. It's hard. Like, I love the advice that you're giving.

It's just hard to do in practice. It is. So that's why at least she could extend one more conversation to be like, you don't really put the effort in? Okay, dude, hit the bricks. Yeah. Either way, hit the bricks. Yeah.

He needs to hit the bricks. I mean, and that's the thing. Like I said, if you can take my advice, don't call him. Yeah. But listen, I've been there. I've fucking needed to hear it spelled out, like written in Shakespearean sonnet, like written in the sky, like before I, you know, could snap out of it. Totally.

Okay. Next question. Dear Sasha and Lainey, I would very much appreciate your take on something I'm going through with my friend. My best friend, let's call her Sandra, started dating my ex. It wasn't the coolest of moves on her part, but she did handle it the best she could and approached me before either of them got romantic or too serious to see if I would be okay with it. We are all in our 20s, so I knew I was not ever going to marry the guy, so I didn't want to stand

in their way. They've now been dating for over eight months and they seem very happy. The problem is that she wants to tell me all the details of their relationship. Their dates, fights, what he's good at in bed, just way too much information that I don't think is fair on me. I feel like I was mature enough to let them have a relationship, but maybe I'm not mature enough to hear about how much they are in love. Is there a way I can ask her to stop telling me all of this? I'm so sick of it. Thanks.

C. It's a fair gripe. She has feelings and her feelings are probably a bit hurt to have to like relive the fact that, you know, her ex ditched her ass and went for the best friend. And I, you know what, I kind of have to say that I think that, see, unfortunately, you might need to suck this one up. And I say that because you can't really have friends with like appendages. You know what I mean?

You can't kind of be like, I want this part of our friendship, but not this part of our friendship. You know, if it's going to be a true best friendship, then you have to hear all of it. And you can't kind of not deal with certain things. You know, you gave them your blessing to be together and so you kind of have to finish the deal up and be there the whole time. Yeah, I'm torn on this too because like you, my first instinct was like, that's so, that's kind of offside.

Like, how did it even happen where they started the, like, spark of whatever it was that turned, like, I know and I, that's what I want to know. Like, I want to know how, for instance, if in a different world I wasn't with Jacek and you and Corey broke up or vice versa, if, like, you weren't with Corey and Jacek and I broke up, like, I don't know how you would find yourself in a situation where you would even be in touch with Jacek or, like… But if we were in our 20s and, like, didn't give a shit about anything, it might be easier. Yeah.

It was easier back in the day. Sure. So I bet you there's probably not a lot of backstory other than he was like, I like her. I like him. And then they got together, you know? Good point. So yeah. But I do agree that it's a little bit like offside. Like, you know, you get the squicks from it for sure. Like, hey. Yeah, it's too bad that your friend's doing that. Well, that dick used to be inside of you. Yeah. Yeah. Right? Like, let's put it bluntly. And then you now have to hear about how, like, that dick works inside your best friend's pussy. Yeah. Like, can

we just put it out there like that's not fun because that's what the friend wants to do the friend wants to be like hey you remember that dick that used to be inside of you well when it's inside of me and it like you know goes in the clockwise motion I really love it yeah and then when like I'm sitting on top of his face like that's what she wants like when she's saying that she's getting all the details that's what girlfriends do right um so sure at the same time i think that in between the lines here she has said that that this guy wasn't the one for her anyway so i think that at some point you're just gonna have to try and find that tweak like what this is just a guy she brought home yeah yeah like this wasn't for her anyway so let it be

good for somebody else, specifically her best friend. Like, maybe it would be easier if you think of yourself as a celebrity. Because in Hollywood, like, they have rotated dicks and pussies all the time, right? Like, take someone like Kate Hudson. So Kate Hudson and Cameron Diaz are friends. You know, they hang out in that Hollywood blonde circle with Gwyneth and Reese and they, whatever, and they're all on Instagram together, whatever. And, but there was a point when Cameron Diaz was with Justin Timberlake, and then they

broke up, and Kate Hudson has been rumored to be flingy with Justin Timberlake, and then there was also A-Rod. Right. Yes. They both have an A-Rod connection, but Cam and Kate are still friends, and the guys are just gone. so you can put yourself in that situation. Oh, and then there was like Courtney Cox

and Jennifer Aniston dated that guy. Is that the guy who sings like turned it into a parking lot? What? Paved Paradise and turned it into a parking lot. I mean, that was Joni Mitchell, but they… Oh, I don't know. Is Adam Duritz counting crows? Yes.

Is Adam Duritz counting crows? Yes. And didn't they do a cover of Joni Mitchell's? Oh, yeah. But I know Jenna Innocent dated him. Yeah. Okay. Well, there you go.

There you go. There's so much proof. But is that the song? Like, whatever. You guys, like, you song nerds can correct me. Is that like Pay Paradise in the parking lot? I don't know. I just know Counting Crows.

Anyway, so there's an example. Like, you can think of yourself as a celebrity. I mean, if you lived in Hollywood, this would happen to you all the time. Yeah. And also the adage of hoes before bros. Yeah. You know, like, your friendship is, you know, your ride or die is with your homegirl. Now, we've just named celebrities in their 30s and 40s, though, and she sees in her 20s.

So if you want examples of people in their 20s, it's a little more dramatic. Well, no, Nikki Reed and Nina Dobrev, they both dated Ian Somerhalder, whatever his name is. And they're friends. Yeah. And they're, like, best friends. And Nikki Reed's, like, married to Ian Somerhalder, whatever the fuck his last name is. Good, good, good example. That's a millennial.

That's a millennial example. Be those celebrities. Yeah. The other millennial examples are, like, a little nastier. I mean, there's obviously, like, Taylor, Swift, Katy Perry, John Mayer. Yeah. So, you know. Justin Bieber and every other, like, Jenner.

Right. The Weeknd. We just talked about The Weeknd, Selena Gomez, and Bella Hadid. They were all friends before, but that is a broken friendship. Yeah. So, I don't know. Like, it depends. I mean, you said that she's your best friend and that you don't care about that guy that

much anyway. So, if… So, stand by your word. That's what I… Yeah, exactly. That's what I want to say. Stand by your actual word and your feelings about this. He meant nothing.

He wasn't going to be anything. He wasn't going to be your forever dude. If she's your forever girl, then you just have to suck it up. And get out, like this, I mean, I know you're, I know like at this time in your life, this kind of thing feels gross and inappropriate to hear all those details. But I don't know, like it's part of being a girlfriend. Yeah. You have to take, you have to hear all the like dick, pussy, cock, like talk.

Yeah. Even though that dick's already been in you. Sasha has to hear it from me all the time. Yeah, but not with my husband. No, no, no, no. I mean, like, you have to hear details of, like, you know… Yeah, you show me your tits. You do all this stuff.

I'm always pummeled by it. I was itchy here. I had shit. This is what happened. Yeah, yeah. I get that. All right. And finally, we have a new segment we're introducing to this podcast.

It's called The Sasha Spotlight. So every week, we're going to try and spotlight people out there who write to us who are doing good, who are putting positive energy into the world because Sasha's motivation right now is, like, you're wearing this world peace hat and you're, like, putting positive energies and essential oils into the world. I think I just know this Sasha spotlight is just, like, fashion stuff that, like, or any kind of thing, beauty that, like, gives you good feelings, right? There's, like, so much out there that it's nice to, like, you know, consume things but

also feel good that you're consuming things. But you've been doing this for a while with your Sasha Finds posts where you're finding things that are all natural, that are good for people, or you're finding lines and brands who are also like giving back to charity and taking some of the proceeds to charity. So this is also in line with that. And don't forget, flash forward to the beginning of this podcast where I was a big cunt and didn't give my phone to someone. So this is the balance.

This is the balance for me. Okay. So I want to talk to you guys about this company that's called Cancer Socks. and so it's c-n-c-r-s-c-k-s.com and it's this girl from Toronto who has just started this sock line and it's inspired by her friends who have been going through and battling cancer and so these socks are adorable and they're all striped and on the underneath on the soles they say cancer sucks but really cancer socks anyways it's cute little play on words and every time you buy a pair you're donating two dollars to the Canadian Cancer Society and I just think that's like such a good

thing to do. And I love that she's on this mission and I want to support her. And so if you want to support her, God knows everybody knows somebody who has cancer, who's struggled with it. So it's just a great way to give back and also have something cute for yourself. I totally believe in this because I only believe in pattern socks. Yes. And they're cute patterns. They're just too little striped. Like I never wear a plain sock. That is like, to me, that if I'm wearing a plain sock, something is wrong. So yes, pattern socks and then pattern socks for a good cause. So it is once again, c-n-c-r-s-c-k-s dot com. Cancer socks, cancer socks.

So thank you for doing that, and good luck with your business. Yes. And we hope you sell lots of socks so that the Canadian Cancer Society can get lots of donations to support those living with cancer and to find a cure. And that wraps up this episode of Sasha Answers. Keep your questions coming to me at Sasha at LaineyGossip.com. Check us out on Google Play and iTunes. Leave your comments.

Leave your ratings. Thank you so much. Talk to you next week. Bye. Bye. Thanks for watching!