What's Your Drama - Driving for D updates and Bailing on a Birthday

Episode Date: July 16, 2020

This week Lainey continues on her "things are normal, right?" rant. She does this weird thing where she declares she's going to do something, this week it's going to the gym, and then somehow turns it on me that it's my fault she can't do it because of COVID. Once we deal with that compulsion it's time to get into your drama.Remember "driving for dick"? Well, she's back again with a follow up on top of a follow up. I won't lie, I was so exhausted after hearing her letter, but Gertrude is definitely dickmatized and we need her to snap the hell out of it.  Then it's onto L who is feeling stuck about what to do when it comes to her friend's upcoming birthday party. It sounds like a banger, but she doesn't know if it's worth the COVID risk.Finally, we end on Emily who has recently started dating an older man who hasn't officially divorced from his ex. Does that mean he's still hanging on? Is that a red flag? Should she bother putting in any more energy? Our answer might surprise you.We hope you enjoy the show and keep sending me all your DRAMA! Send your advice questions my way at [e-mail]. We also love hearing from you on Twitter at @sasha_tong and @laineygossip and Instagram at @lostandfoundapothecary and @laineygossip. And of course subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, and make sure to leave feedback and comments because it helps others find our show!  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm worried that allergy meds dull your histamine receptors. Okay. So you're always – I mean, listen, I will be crawling, dying, sniffling – I'm listening. What are you doing? I'm listening. I noticed you doing this anyway. You're pulling back your face skin. Yeah.

Okay. I'm just seeing what I would look like if I just got a little tweak. Yeah. you were doing this though do you keep hearing podcast ads like this one for example but always wonder how you actually get involved with them for your own brand or organization well it's easier than you think we're acast and we give you the platform to do it all yourself browse thousands of popular podcasts choose the shows that match your perfect audience set your budget and launch And if you want a hand, our podcast specialists are there to help you launch with confidence.

This is podcast advertising without barriers. Get started at acast.com slash advertise. Hi, I'm Lainey Louie, talk show host and entertainment reporter, I'm also the editor of LaineyGossip.com, and I am a BTS fan. Yeah, you are. I'm Sasha Tong. I am a producer at an entertainment show here in Canada. I'm also a fashion and beauty columnist on LaineyGossip.com.

And I am not a big BTS fan. But this is What's Your Drama, where we gossip about you. are you reading this week no you gotta stop doing that that's no no just accept who you are in this podcast now you are the reader you know what's funny why do you hate it so much i just don't get it i don't i just you know what's funny is that um uh in uh i heard it i heard it I heard you're talking about… And she thought she could read and I was like, no, I actually do this for a living and I'm doing it.

Yeah. So why do you think I do this for a living? I don't read shit for a living. Duanna would probably be a better reader than I am because she's like dramatic and loves stories and fucking arcs. She'd probably be decent. Anyway, who cares? Read.

Oh, no. Not read. No, I wanted to. Oh, right. So, I'm sorry, but where we live, in a few days, the government is moving into another phase and included in that phase is that gyms are open. So, it is legal to go to workout. And I work, I have the best results and I respond better to going to workout classes.

So, am I going back to the gym? That is a question you will have to answer yourself. This is what you do to me. I feel like you- Why are you being so judgy? Why are you being so judgy? But this is why I feel like you do this. You, like, week after week, you pose these questions like,

Sasha, like, I'm getting back to life next week. And you do that, but then you also recognize that every time you're wrong. Your instincts about COVID, when it's going to be over, when you feel like real life is going to start is always incorrect. But I'm saying this is the government schedule, Sash. They're saying gyms can open. Do you – like you run your life by the government. Like whatever the government tells you, you go, yes, sir.

I will do – you tell me to go into a restaurant and eat with 50 people? Cool. I'll do that. Would you do that? I'm not going to go to a restaurant. Exactly. So if you can decipher between those things – Because I can eat food in my home.

I can't work out in my home. No, I haven't. I haven't in four months. It doesn't work for me. I can cook. What have you tried? Can you tell me that you… You're very particular about your workouts.

You only want a treadmill, right? So maybe you could be a little less inflexible and maybe… Like, when you say I've tried to work out, what else have you fucking tried to do besides pretend that you could maybe, like, run on a treadmill, on some fucking phantom treadmill? What do you do? Do you watch videos? well I'll tell you I found this amazing this is actually wow what a great platform we have to actually give this chick um some love so her name is Rachel Fitness on Instagram her workouts are

30 minutes I only do them three times a week you're supposed to do them five and you're also supposed to couple that shit with like a 15 minute run which I do not do but three zero minutes three zero minutes it's fucking excellent I'm fucking rinsed to the tits afterwards and um like I don't mean to be like look at my arms but my arms are fucking really good right now they've never been this good i look at them i know you're looking and judging but like i have i have like biceps and triceps and i'm like weirdly no sorry she showed no sorry lady just showed me her arms um so sorry no that was an arm but there was no what muscle bicep bicep anyway she's great Rachel Fitness look her up and surprisingly um I'm motivated I'm I'm not motivated to work out

because I only do it three times a week but it's great and you just give her what you can along the way. Like, you know, she's offering it for free, but if you do have employment, then you can pay by Venmo or PayPal. So just like a really good free, if you need it to be free, resource. Well, Haley's doing really great stuff on our website and she's like, you know, on YouTube with, it's just, I find it like, I don't know, I feel because I'm surrounded by comfort in my home. it's hard. I'm like, oh, there's my book. I was just reading it. It's so good. And there's my TV. And oh, look, I have popcorn in the cupboard right now. I know. Listen. Yes, I know. It's fucking hard as hell. But I don't know. I kind of just keep on thinking about

how much money I'm saving in terms of like not parking and not wasting money on gas. And listen, the other way that I have worked out pre-pandemic was boxing. I fucking love boxing I can't recreate that at home so we just circle back to what you said am I gonna go back to my favorite boxing gym which I love and hold such like a beautiful place in my heart for because not only is it a wonderful place in Toronto called Bolo by our friend Callie and I want to support her but I am not ready to go into a fucking gym where people are huffing and puffing when we don't know if this virus, still we do not know if it's aerosol or not. That's a fucking problem for me. I'm not rolling the dice on that shit. You are though? Well, that's why I'm talking about it

with you. And obviously Yasik is not going to be on board. Okay, good. Yes, no, stop that and don't get your fucking nails done right now. Can you just fucking chill on the mic? My ma went and got her nails done and she's immunocompromised and she is like more militant than you. But I think the lady up by her neighborhood like closed down the place and disinfected it before she came. And so it was just her and the lady. So she feels okay about it. But I'm, you know, I've been calling her every day.

But no, I am dealing with my janky nails, whatever. All right. All right. Well, should we get started? Let's get started. Okay. So our first letter is a repeat because a few weeks ago, if you've been listening regularly, you may remember that we got a message from somebody who initially we thought was getting

catfished and she sent us a photo of the dude and she was like we were like and it's during COVID and she's like should I travel five hours for the D and she sent us the photo and I of course was like yeah go get the D and then some of you thought she was getting catfish, but then she actually sent us a picture of the dude in bed with his face blushed and in a hotel room, and they clearly boned. Anyway, so they've been boning regularly. And she sent us some updates, right, which is lovely of her. We have an update, so we're going to call her Gertrude and him David, okay?

The reason why he's called David is because she's compared him to the sculpture of David, which LOL, LOL, LOL, LOL. Okay. We've seen the picture. LOL. well. Okay. So to recap, this is from Gertrude. We started off online. It was casual and hot, but things are escalating. We constantly book hotel rooms just to spice things up during COVID and go on walks. We haven't talked about being official, but he'll say things like,

how's my mom going to like it if you leave hickeys on my neck? And he makes some other comments that sound like he wants to keep seeing me. Don't ask about the hickeys. I'm a beast. Okay, Gertrude. We're so immature, P.S. Yes. I think we'll know that by now. Also, she is too, okay? Okay, so wait, wait, wait.

Hickies, hickies. Oh, right. But the reason I'm mentioning this is because he's got a questionable Instagram. I've noticed before but chose to ignore it. I've concluded he's insecure and buys many of his followers. It was hard for me to believe this because he's gorgeous and has an interesting personality, but I've done some intense lurking because I'm desperate for answers. The, quote, followers he has live either in a different country

and he doesn't follow them back or they're just flat out fake. On a regular basis, he posts polls on IG Story if he should cop or drop a pair of Amiri jeans or Versace glasses. What the fuck are Amiri? Do you mean Armani? Armani? Maybe it's Armani. Okay.

That is a typical day in the life of David, but I ask myself why you're seeking validation from mostly fake followers. He wears head-to-toe designer in basically all his pictures. Most celebrities don't even wear head-to-toe designer. Yeah, because it's a little bit lame. Well, actually, no. BTS has been known to wear head-to-toe designer and it looks really good on them. Keep going.

This person is not BTS. Anyway, so David has 47,000 followers but isn't promoting anything and he's not verified. I asked him how he affords all this designer stuff and he says he invests in high-risk stocks. I believe it, but it's fishy that he learned how to become a good investor through Reddit. His family seems average. Their suburban home looks smaller than my old house, so I doubt his family is rich and they're gifting him all this designer shit.

I have many questions about his social media and why he needs constant validation. I know he's insecure because on our first date he told me, you better not bail, even though I'm the one dating up. Okay, Gertrude, we need to work on your… Yes, that will be phase two of this advice. And on our second meetup, I decided to pre-drink. So he asked me if I was pre-drinking just, quote, to be able to put up with him. They are really insecure comments and he has no reason to feel this way.

I'm commuting far to see him and I've paid some of our hotel stays. His insecurity seems extreme. I asked myself, what more do I need to do to prove to him that I'm super attracted to him? Certain things don't add up. We've been seeing each other for about a month, but he never lurks my Instagram stories. Like, wouldn't he be slightly curious to know what I post on my stories? He does watch my Snapchat stories, but I find it weird that it's never Instagram.

He's so active online too. I originally didn't think much of it, but now things are building up. We were exchanging photos and when I sent him my pic, he's like, you posted it on your story so it doesn't count. I want an exclusive shot. But when I checked who viewed my Instagram, his name wasn't there. Anyway, she goes on to say that she doesn't know how he's seeing her Instagram stories unless he's hiding his identity and why he would go so far to hide, right?

Anyway. And whether or not if it's a glitch that he's viewing, but she can't see who's viewing, it's all kinds of social media details and mess. We don't need to read through it. Okay? Okay. So I don't know why he's doing this, but I'm slowly starting to believe he is logging in, but faking it, right? He mentioned how he previously used to know how to pretend to be someone else on Snapchat. So it seems on brand for him to pull something like this with Instagram. If he actually is doing this, why does he care so much if I can see that he's seen my stories? Is he just trying to play it cool?

We are going out. We're fucking each other. I obviously care to a certain degree. So why is he being sketchy with Instagram and with all these insecure remarks? Or am I just crazy for thinking he's shady? He's clearly insecure, but I can deal with that. We all have insecurities, but I don't want it to be an extreme situation where he needs constant validation from fake followers and myself.

no matter what I do it's like he's always second guessing my interest in him should I continue talking to him and sweep it under the rug or actually drop him well first of all Gertrude who are we kidding you're not going to drop him please oh no can we not start it that way I want I'm sorry but do you think she's she's already been flying all distances five hours to fuck him get hotel rooms she she's so invested in this like you and I are not going to get her to drop him. That is not on the table. As much as she thinks it's on the table, come on, let's live in reality. She's not, but we should. Okay. Well, for the sake of this podcast, we have to give her some sort of advice and I'm sure shit not going to give her the advice to be like, yeah, this guy

sounds like a gem. Keep going. Because to me, like if I started to date and I know that I am like fucking ancient and old and fucking cobwebby when it comes to social media. But I feel like I have like a gauge of cool. And I feel like if I was starting to date someone and they had a whole bunch of fake followers, that would be like an instant turnoff because that says enough about somebody, insecurity, trying to be like a celebrity, also like a clout chaser, but like a faux clout chaser, like all of that is gross to me. That would be so unattractive that I'm, no matter how attractive this person is, and we've noted that this is not our type of good looking, but if Gertrude, you know, gets shit

wet down there for fucking David. David. Great. fine do what you need to do but like I would never be so clouded by someone's beauty if I thought they were such a nerd behind the scenes like I couldn't I wouldn't I would be a no-go so the fact that she's questioning this makes me have hope that Gertrude is is could maybe be swayed to lose the loser because this guy sounds like a loser and someone who has to like dress in designer clothes like I don't think he has fucking money in high interest stakes I think his shit is

probably fake as well like I don't think the dude you know coming from Hong Kong there are some really good fakes out there like I feel like he's probably wearing fake Armani fake Balenciaga fake followers fake tan we looked at his fucking picture initially looked like a fake fucking picture I just feel like our gut was right that he was um no he's super thirsty and not legit he's super thirsty he probably does buy followers lots and lots of people buy followers who has 87,000 and 47 oh 47 are you sure you said 47 okay yeah yeah 47 follower 47,000 followers lots and lots of people buy followers lots of influencers buy followers lots of like influencers who are allegedly legit and get brand name sponsorships by followers but this is none of

those already yeah but he wants to be he has an aspiration how is this any thirstier than like in the old days people wanting to be actors and they like you know did whatever they could to be an actor they like went up to directors they you have to there's if you really want something there's a certain desperation in like, there's a certain desperation that you have to resort to, to get what you want. I don't love desperation and I desperately don't like desperation coupled with insecurity. Well, fuck. I mean like every, first of all, to go back to actors, every actor is painfully insecure. We already know this. That's why they're the worst. Sure. But it, that's you. And are you saying that you speak for lots and lots of people who wouldn't date an actor who

wouldn't be into an actor? No, you can't say that. I cannot say that. Okay. In fact, you're probably the minority. So we are working from a baseline of you have zero thirst and you're not into that. But the baseline out there, especially for this generation is that they have an acceptable level of thirst built in that they're cool with. But this generation is savvy, savvy enough to spot out somebody who is fake and that like, right, that they are savvy and so savvy that this, we had to skip over what Gertrude was saying because, A, we didn't understand it, and, B, it was, like, way too technically, like, advanced for us. Like, she is doing all the data and, like, fucking crunching all the, like,

Instagram numbers. Like, she's like, this is fucking lame. She knows it's fucking lame. So I don't want to pass over her to be like, oh, you're such a dummy. She also is, like, getting the red flag here that something fucking jacked up. For sure. I mean, Gertrude, in his initial photos, he already looked thirsty and insecure as fuck. But as she said, she can handle insecurity.

She said that. We're all insecure. What this is, it's Instagram drama, as usual. She's wondering why she knows he watches her stories but isn't admitting to watching her stories, which stems from insecurity. He doesn't want to admit how into you he is. However he's watching your stories, I don't know. We are not tech experts here.

I do not want to go into an Instagram deep dive on how, whether or not he's a fake profile or whatever. Somehow he's watching your stories. He knows what you're doing and he doesn't want to admit to it, which amounts to him not being, probably not wanting to share with you how into you he is. Right? Do you agree with that? Yes.

Common denominator here, though, is trust. She does not trust him right now. No. What does one do with that? then? Well, I, I think that it's all compounded by her weird, her being weirded out by where he gets his money. Right. Cause that also is part of the trust thing. And I don't know, like she's saying it could be sketchy. Like how does he afford all these clothes? You're saying maybe they came off a truck. Yeah. I'm very much saying it's coming from a truck. Yeah. Someone's fucking

back drunk. Yeah. Yeah. Um, and, um, I'm saying I wouldn't know this until Jacek said it to me the other day. So he, his, he reads like the economist and all kinds of other financial reporting. And I don't know if you know this, but like, have you seen the stock market? I mean, it's doing okay. Even though so many other parts of the economy are so shitty because of the pandemic. It's not in line with other business streams. Like the fucking stock market is inflating. Yeah, that's right. And he read that there are some analysts who believe that the reason why it's inflated is because so many people are staying home and they're doing their online playing of the stock market, even those who aren't experts, right? You can fucking teach

yourself anything these days. You can YouTube yourself a degree in, I don't know, dentistry. Fuck. That's scary to me, but… Totally. It's possible. Right. And so she's saying that he said that he learned how to become a trader on Reddit. That actually happens. I believe that. It's crazy enough for me to believe it because this is our world. Okay. And so it is very possible that he is spending his hours online trading and making very quick wins and perhaps making or losing quick losses. Okay, so you're like…

That is your game. So you're like, Gertrude, just… Yes, I believe him. Go for it. Keep fucking… It's not that I don't believe him. It's a possibility. Like, I wouldn't write off the whole Reddit thing.

I learned how to, I learned how to be a trader on Reddit because. Possible. Okay. For sure it's possible. Okay. So then what, I just want to get down to what you're trying to tell Gertrude here. I'm trying to tell Gertrude that I don't, I think you should get the conspiracy theory shit out of your head, first of all.

I think, because Gertrude sent us a follow-up email, which was so wildly conspiracist. That we're not including it. That we're not including it because, Gershford, neither one of us wants to go there. Yeah. So enough with your conspiracy theories. I do not think this guy is whatever you think he is. I do think that he's painfully insecure and desperately wants to be an influencer. So those are your two things.

Do you want to be with a dude like that? Answer your question and get back to us. That's it. Don't get back to us. I'm good with all the updates, Gershford. I feel like we have given you the wings to fly now. Go fly. I'm cool without the updates.

All I will say is trust your gut. If you think someone's suspect, they probably are. I don't think you should go down some dark hole of conspiracy theories. I don't trust Gertrude's gut. But when she is fucking Reddit conspiracy-ing this thing. Okay. You had your time, Gertrude. i am i thought he was sketched from line one of your initial um letter to us so i am trusting my

gut whether or not you want to trust your own i think he is um insecure like laney said i think he is uh fake thirsty and thirsty and those are no qualities i would like to bring into my life Okay. Bye, Gertrude. Fly. Fly away. Love you, but fly. Digital precision, host-read authenticity, and performance data that proves it worked. Don't fight for attention. Buy it with Acast. Learn more by visiting acast.com slash advertise. Okay, next.

Hi, Sasha and Lainey. Got a friendship COVID drama question coming your way. Oh, Sasha's favorite. My friend, let's call her Penelope, is turning 40 in a few weeks, and she's decided to invite our group of friends, 15 plus, up to her vacation home for the big celebration. She is quite a big compound, so we can all sleep at her vacation home. She's getting it catered, renting some extra boats and water toys, and is really going all out. Don't get me wrong. I want to go. It's going to be so much fun, but I'm not feeling like it's the safest thing to

do during a pandemic. I know Sasha is more vigilant and extra about this all, but I'd love to hear what you guys both think. Wouldn't I be awful if I didn't go? Is there a way I can make it up to her or should I go even though I'm uneasy about it? I know everyone is going and I know everyone is taking this pandemic seriously, but I'm still nervous about spending an entire weekend indoors with people even though they're my closest friends. Help. It's coming up soon and I need your advice. L. Don't you dare throw this over to me right now. I fucking am. I am Debbie Downer, I guess. So you tell me what you do, even though I know what you're going to say, which is why don't you just say what you're going to say, which is what a quick no, hell no. Right. Pretty much. So

I just wanted to wrap this one in a bow. So I'd let you talk longer about how you would like show up with your forties and you'd be like, yeah, let's fucking party to the break of dawn in your house. Yeah. Let me fucking sleep with you. Let me fucking co-sleep with you. Let me eat your fork and, like, fucking take food off your plate and eat it and I'm fine with it. No. I'm… Unlike you, I have had one to two people over at a time. Inside your house.

Inside, which is allowed. Who? Can you not out them? Yeah, a friend. I've had one person over twice. No, I've had two different people over twice. Yeah, okay. At different times.

Okay. Okay. And this weekend, two people are coming over at the same time. Okay. Didn't get that invite. Got it. I'm not inviting you because you would say no. Well, it's always nice to invite people that you know and you're friends with who are… Oh, do you want to come over on Sunday, Sasha? Desperately, love me. Go on. Do you want to come over on Sunday, Sasha? Keep on going. Would you like to come inside my house? No. Keep on going. Great. Because I have vegan burgers. I bought them. Your own… Okay. Just keep on going. No. Because see? That's why I'm not asking you because you're full of shit because you wouldn't come.

I wouldn't come inside because I don't know. I know. Because I, well, it goes, it goes deeper because I don't know who these two people are. But go on. No, I'm saying, I'm saying they're coming Saturday. I'm asking you to come over on Sunday. Would you like to come over on Sunday? Oh, you're taunting me now. Continue. Let's keep on this question. Okay. I have to have a quick vape. Okay. So I've had one or two people over and I've also been to someone's home with another person. Like last Friday I was over at someone's place with another friend and there were three of us. Okay. And that's fine. I do not go to patios. I don't like the patio situation. I think that's weird. Yep. But 15 plus people in a compound. Like what kind of compound? Are we talking Drake's

compound? Because that's… Well, she did say she's like… There's obviously… She's flush, right? Because she's getting extra boats and shit's getting catered. She has money. Okay. So maybe it's not Drake, but enough that there's enough room to house 15 people comfortably, I'm imagining. 15 people maintaining six feet apart at all times. Like in my house, which is small. It's hard to have even… They're not. That's what her concern is. That she knows that they're not going to be staying six feet apart. Yeah. I mean, you don't sound very comfortable, Elle. That's the thing. Exactly. I'm just going to go with the vibes that you're giving us. If someone else had written and been like, I really, really want to go. And like, I'm really tired.

You know, I think it's going to be safe. And I know all these people. But that's not your tone. Your tone is extreme discomfort and I feel like your only worry is that you're going to, like, it's FOMO, that all these people are going. But you know what? I think in the new COVID-19 reality, if people aren't comfortable, we all have to learn to respect that. That is exactly… Right?

That was where I was going to pick up, which is what has been so nice. And yes, of course, our friend group is all about, like, poking fun and fucking calling out people and making fun of people. but what I have enjoyed is that people have respected my boundaries, which is, and it's not about me being a psycho. It's like, what makes me feel comfortable? What makes me feel safe? And you can't fuck with someone's safety and their feeling of safety. You can't, no, you can't question it. You can't, you can't second guess it. Like I've said to people like, no, I just don't feel comfortable. Or no, I can't do that because of X, Y, Z. And people like,

okay, cool. Like, um, and I think right now no one is going to make you feel bad for feeling not comfortable. So if these are your closest 15 friends, then I'm sure that they probably know you're, you know, on the scale of Lainey to Sasha, you're a little bit more Sasha and that they'll probably see that coming, but also that they'll respect you and your choices because this isn't fucking willy nilly shit. It's like, it all, that's what freaks me out every time I think about like, do I, is it worth it? Is like just that one thing, that one fucking off chance of touching something or fucking walking into someone's car, who the fuck knows? Is that, is that something I want to risk? Right. And that's what it is. It's a, it's a risk,

it's a risk management situation. And if you don't want to do that, if you don't want to put yourself in a situation and listen, are you really going to have that much fun over the weekend? If you're kind of worrying about everything and you're like that weirdo person, like being like, ugh, don't come close to me. Like, no one wants you to be there either if you're going to be weirded out by it. So, yes, I also would like to then piggyback with what Lainey said, which is, yeah, you clearly, you're writing to us because you're unsure. So that's your gut.

Trust it. And just how to make it up to her. I don't know. After this is all said and done. Oh, my God. Your birthday is coming up soon. What do you want to do for your birthday? No, it's not.

It's in like 10 weeks. Yeah. Again. It's in 10 weeks. Okay. So we're going to be in a similar situation in 10 weeks. What would you like to do? Are you wanting to do something indoors?

You know what? I will do something with you separately. I will walk over, which I have respected your boundaries. And when I come over and I sit in your yard, you know I'm very respectful of you. Yeah. So I'll just come over to your place. I'll sit in your yard and you'll have to celebrate me in your yard. Just the two of us.

But no, I'm fine with a small group of people. Do you have something else planned that you're not telling me about? I haven't thought about it. Okay. But I actually really like this idea that I get a specialized, customized, individualized celebration from you. That's a lot of pressure. That's a lot of fucking no. From you on the birthday.

I'll go wherever you want. Thank you. I'll go wherever you want me to go then. No, no, no. I really like this idea. Do you know that will be disappointing for you? No, you can sing to me. You can prepare a…

Like, you can prepare a performance, like choreography. Oh, right. That's what will happen. Okay, go. Last question. But wait, wait. I just want to finish with Elle, but about this general thing. My colleague and friend on the social, Cynthia Loyce, put it this way.

This is a new and related but next level conversation about consent. Yeah. What COVID has done. It's not unlike an intimate relationship where you're like, is this okay? Can I keep going? Do you feel comfortable? Can we go even further? And if you out there are a believer in consent when it comes to sex, and you should be, and

the fluidity of consent, that consent is ongoing and isn't just like at the beginning you say yes, so it means yes all the way, then you should be also on board with COVID consent where you shouldn't be judging people for not feeling comfortable and you shouldn't be making them feel bad. I have to sneeze. My allergies have been so bad. Oh, Yasik's going to get me for this because he's been like on me to take allergy meds and I've been so resistant because I've never taken allergy meds in my life because I have never been as allergic as I am lately. Well, I developed allergies like eight years ago out of fucking nowhere and it was horrible. I think this is what's happening to me.

Can I tell you that I have, and I'm happy to give you a box because I got a shit ton of them. Wait, but let me blow my nose first. Whoa. Can't you still listen and blow? I have a new, like a new, what are they called? Like a new generation allergy medication. Okay.

And they like are better than Claritin, better than Reactin, better than whatever the fuck. He's on Allegra. Again, this is like you have to get it prescribed to you. Okay. It's really, really good. And it's yours to have. It's a box to have. Really?

Yeah. I have like eight boxes. Anyway, just saying, if you need it, it's here for you. I just don't like a new drug, you know? Okay. I thought you would be so into a new drug. I just, I, I, I don't want to like, I, I'm worried that allergy meds dull your, dull your histamine receptors.

Okay. So you're always, I mean, listen, I will be crawling, dying, sniffling. I'm listening. i'm listening i noticed you doing this anyway you're you're pulling back your face skin yeah okay i'm just seeing what i would look like yes i just got a little tweak yeah you were doing this though fine okay well anyway so covid consent everybody um don't be an asshole about it because if you wouldn't be an asshole with sexual consent, then you shouldn't be an asshole with COVID consent.

Well said. Great. Next and finally. Hi, Sasha and Lainey. I've been dating my BF for the past six months. I'm in my late 20s and he is in his early 40s. Let's call him Dave. Okay.

That's a popular name today. He is extremely wealthy and a somewhat public figure. Oh. He's been legally separated from his wife for the past three years, but not yet divorced. as Gwyneth Paltrow would say, a conscious uncoupling. He speaks highly of her and calls her his best friend and says they just grew apart. They were together over 10 years and have no children, so there is nothing tying them together. It's not contentious, so I'm not sure why they haven't moved ahead with the divorce. He said that since they didn't have a prenup and his newfound

wealth was acquired during the marriage, the untying of assets and all the legal complications are just too time consuming and neither is in the rush to remarry. They live separately, everything is amicable, so there is no real reason to pull the trigger and finalize the divorce. He doesn't post pics of us because he says he doesn't want to rub it in her face. As well, because of our age difference and his wealth, he warned I'd probably receive backlash on being a gold digger as the last girl he was spotted with, spotted with, received a lot of hate online and he learned his lesson to keep things under wraps for everyone's sake. Hmm.

I honestly don't think he wants to reconcile with his ex. I truly don't. By all accounts, he's a great boyfriend and there are no issues in our relationship. I just don't know if I should continue investing in a relationship and getting further attached if there's no real future if he's so unwilling to let go of his past. Is his unwillingness to fully move on a red flag or should I stick it out? Thanks, Emily. Hmm.

Well, Emily. All right. Extremely wealthy. That, first of all, I will say that that is not the first time. And a lot of people I know who are either financial advisors or involved in that world as, you know, adjacent to very wealthy people or who work with them or whatever, um have told me that yeah it is so expensive to get divorced and wealthy people are sometimes the cheapest about this kind of shit i shouldn't say cheapest but like you know they're like why when we get along and so it's not unheard of listen we're not extremely wealthy so i know we can't put ourselves in the mindset but for them there there's a fuck so it's like a fuck ton of fucking shit tied up and locked down and it's so complicated especially if it's amicable

like why are you going to lose a bunch of money when everything is kosher do you know I mean like if everybody's like squared away and like everyone's handshaked and everyone knows that we're moving on then yeah maybe it's not worth the I don't know almost a hundred thousand dollars like it's expensive yeah um yeah I'm struggling because I sort of I sort of believe him like I'm sort of like oh okay like you're old enough you've you've you've made some mistakes you've learned from them you're trying to protect Emily a bit with the whole like I don't want to post you on Instagram because I don't want fucking trolls coming for you like but then the other way is like could he be really sketchy like has he has he is he just like really like a well-played player

I don't know. I'm a little bit torn, but Emily says he's a great boyfriend. He's obviously been quite honest and forthcoming with his past relationship. So if the only red flag is that he's being upfront and telling you the truth, then I'm okay with that. I just, like, you know, not posting about her online seems reasonable given how fucked up it is on social media these days. Yeah. Online hate is real, you know, from Twitter and social media. Like, people are, for sure. And by the way, Emily, you can easily verify that. Like, there's a record of it. There must be. You can go back and look if it's still there. But, I mean, I think we've seen enough shittiness on all these social media platforms that happen

to celebrities and crazy fans with crazy theories and it's trash out there. It's total trash. It can be. I mean, there are fans who do great, great things. Like mostly I would say, you know, 90, I'm going to bring it back to BTS again. I would say 95% of BTS fans are awesome, right? Like, look how much money they raised for Black Lives Matter, and look what they did to cockblock, you know, Trump's stupid convention or whatever.

It's amazing. But what would happen? But what would happen? There is, yeah. But there is a segment that they attack each other. And I don't want that segment to characterize the entire army of BTS fans, because that's not fair. They do so much good.

But there are, like, and, you know, a 5%, a 5% amount can still be really hurtful and abusive. Yeah. But what we all know is as soon as you invite people into your personal life, it's a whole bunch of other shit that just is unnecessary and unwarranted. So maybe he, you know, as we said, he's learned from his mistakes. He's learned that, like, is it really worth it to, like, parade your new relationship on the gram?

Probably not. Well, the only… So, yeah, I think that all of his reasons sound reasonable, as you say, Sash, and yet we still have to leave open the door for sketchiness. So my question is, he doesn't have to introduce you online and you guys don't have to have an online relationship. Like, that doesn't… It's not real.

but have you met his friends? Yeah. Have you met his colleagues? Have you met, or is it, are you completely separate from every part of his life? You didn't, she didn't say, right? Like she hasn't, she hasn't said anything at all about, um, it's just online. And I, I, I honestly, she's in her twenties. So yeah, people are focused so much on the online presence, but what about his friends? What about his family? Like, you know, you said that they're very amicable and she's his best friend. So have you met her? Yeah. How is he bringing you into his life? Yeah. Is it real life? Does she know about you? Right? Does she know about you at all? So I have some follow-up questions. I hope you can answer them, Emily, because otherwise on paper, what he says

is kind of legit. Totally. But we still want to leave room for him being a fucking asshole. So. Yes. We're always happy for that. Yes. Yeah. But you got to give us more info. Have you met the friends? So let us know. Yeah. Well, also just answer that question. Also tell us who he is. I know. Again, send us pictures. It was funny because I, she sent it, her real name's not Emily and I guess nor is her email address because I copied and pasted the name to be like, let me see. And that person does not exist either. So she's obviously keeping it under wraps. She's quite smart um but yeah i think i think emily needs to answer exactly what you just posed which is is he is he inviting you into his life outside of social media which is totally fine friends

family ex-wife if there's children involved like do people know you fucking exist people know you exist then i think you can move forward with this relationship but yeah he's like keeping you in his living room and all you do is like hang out inside his house, then yeah, that's fucking suspect behavior. Yeah. Yeah. So I think that's pretty simple. Like I think you can move forward once you answer those questions.

Let us know. Please. Please. Yeah. Now that we don't have Gertrude, we're still looking for more follow-ups. Thanks to all of you for writing in and for listening. Keep your questions coming to me at Sasha at LaineyGossip.com. and subscribe to us wherever you get your podcasts,

leave comments and reviews. We so appreciate it. And just let you know, our new summer schedule is every other week. So we will be back in two weeks and show your work. We'll be back next week and we're just kind of alternating so that we can get a little bit of a summer, all of us.

Well, yeah. Yeah. As much as we can. Okay. Yeah. Bye. Thanks. Bye.

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