What's Your Drama - Justin Timberlake Is An Appendix

Episode Date: January 31, 2018

We had to take a short little break cause people were gross and sick! Forgive us?On today's show: Why JT is a useless organ, if you should ever cross the friend zone, what you should do if your boyfriend is chauvinist and finally, how to handle your pilfering mother-in-law.Thanks for tuning and keep your feedback/questions coming to me at [e-mail] and hit us up on twitter at @sasha_tong and @laineygossip and Instagram at @lostandfoundapothecary and @laineygossip. And of course on iTunes and Google Play. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Yes. There were health issues all over the place. Yes. And you didn't want to come here and be infected. No. And then Corey had his appendix taken out. Yeah, no big deal. Just an organ came out.

So I need all the details. Well, I know that you and, like, Yasik is very interested in Corey's appendix. Yes. Okay. So Corey had appendix issues for a while. Since June. And they tried to treat it with medication, right? Yes.

We have made many a hospital visit over the last… What is June? June, July, August, September, October, November, December, June. Holy fuck. It's been almost eight months of this bullshit. Okay. So what was fascinating, I just want people to know when, like, as they're listening, what was fascinating is when it started, you thought he was, like, pregnant.

I thought he was getting fat. Yes. And horrible. I'm a bad person. But Corey is a very wee, waify, Kate Moss type silhouette. So when he started to, like, get bigger in the gut, I was like, dude, like, slow your roll in the beers, like something's happening to your metabolism. That's fucking crazy.

So in the space of a week or two, he, you know, like had a baby. He was like four months pregnant. Yes. And was it tender? Like if you like poked him there, would it be like, ah, sort of. It was just more, I think he basically, what he did have was not acute appendicitis. He had chronic appendicitis. So yeah, it was just, it's been fucking so annoying because all we do is talk about

Like, my stomach and this and that and this, right? And, like… You're so sympathetic and kind. I know. And I should. Fuck. If anybody, I should be supportive because I know in our relationship when I was going through my shit, he was shit supportive.

So I wanted to step up my game. But then I realized it's really annoying taking care of someone who's whining. Anyway, he got it removed. And now I've just been, like, being, like, the man of the house. Okay. You just skipped 10,000 steps. Okay. What else do you want to know?

So he has to go to the hospital, so you're in the hospital. In the hospital. And I'm an asshole idiot, so I can never remember right side or left side. Your appendix is on your right side. So if you're looking down at your belly button, it's on the right. Yes. Okay, so what exact… is it laparoscopic? Yes.

So they take a laser. Sorry, if you're looking down right now, it's on your right hand side. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay, so it's laparoscopic, so they make an incision, they make a hole. And then, like, what? They just fucking take it out? Well, what's so fucked about it?

So I don't really, I guess I haven't ever really thought about that surgery before. But they go in, so there's three holes in his stomach. So, and they're tiny. And I guess they go through your fucking belly button. And then they pull out the fucking appendix through your belly button. Come on! Or one of the holes. There's three and they're small.

And what the fucked up thing is, there's no stitches. It's basically, it's just like a, I don't even know what a suture is. I'm saying that word. Like I know what it is. But basically it's just like a bandaid on because they were like, oh, and if it falls off, just put a bandaid back on top of the fucking hole. So they yanked it out of the belly button. And I mean, I'm sure so many people who've had this surgery know what's up, but it's, how do they do that? How do they go in and go bing, bing, bing, dong, bing, dong, and then pull it out of the fucking tiny hole? Well, presumably like that's what you want. Instead of creating

a scar, you already have a fucking hole there. So then you pull it out of that fucking hole. But there's three holes. So I don't know which hole they came, take it out of, but they took it out of one from his body. Okay, so do you get to keep it? Do you want us to stop? This is not the part I wanted to hear. Oh, Yasik was not, what do you want to hear?

This is the part I want to hear. No, I don't care. Not yet. Not yet. Yasik. He's bored about this. Okay, so I've heard stories that people come to and they see their appendix, like sitting in a jar next to them and it's like fucking black no he did not see that but what he doesn't say is he can feel that it's gone which i listen cory doesn't say stuff like this so i have to believe him but it has no function well that's what they say who says that people

who don't have their appendix it within you for something it does something no it doesn't it's not crucial. No, we don't know that. You are not a doctor, nor am I. You can function in life without it, much like you can function without another, what is it? Kidney. Yeah. Or gallbladder, all that kind of shit. Okay. So does he… Okay. I need to back up. So he did not see his rotted appendix. No, he did not. Because he was put under. Okay. But I thought maybe, like, I don't want to ever go through this. Yeah.

Ever. Me neither. Now I'm always paranoid. But if you have ever gone through this out there, are you able to request that you can at least see it? Yeah. If I had that option, I would probably want to see it. Fuck yeah.

Right? Yeah. If it's coming out of my body, I want to fucking see what it looks like. Me too. Yeah. Okay. So there's no, like, there's a baby stitch in his belly button at this point. There's three holes, as I keep on saying, and they're bloody and dried with blood.

And I look at them and I want to fucking vomit all over him. Oh, can you take a picture of me? Oh, I have one. Oh, can you take a picture? Okay. Really? I do have three. But then you get to see, like, you'll see a bit of his pubic hair, which is actually

quite wrong. So I'm not going to show you that. But he's doing well. He is doing well. He's fine. He's fine. Okay. So what kind of drugs does he have to take for recovery?

Like, he was just given Tylenol 3 with codeine. Okay. And that didn't do shit for him. Was he in pain? Yes. Yeah, because you have fucking, again, three holes in your goddamn body. It's like you've been shot three times. So it was the pain from the holes, not the pain from like having something cut away from

your body. It's the whole pain, which actually makes me feel grosser. The whole pain. All the holes. The three hole pain. Is the pain. But he also, I'm sure lots of people, God, are people interested in this? I hope so.

Because this is riveting to me. Because they blow up your fucking stomach with a whole bunch of air. So not only do they like put three holes in your body, but they also blow up your insides. So how does the air come out? Do you fart it out? Yes. So that is the deal. You get so much gas.

Part of the pain too is gas pain. Like sometimes people feel it in their shoulders. It goes, like the gas pain can rise all over your body. And so, yeah. What? Yeah. Okay, so he's… But again, he didn't suffer the big stomach.

Like most people, our friend Danielle Graham, her husband, got his appendix taken out. She was like, oh, right, his stomach must be, like, nine months pregnant. I was like, no, he also has a flatter stomach than me, too. Somehow they blew up his fucking stomach with air, yet he still looks like his stomach's, again, flatter than mine. And I don't understand. He is, like, an interesting specimen, that boy. Okay, so what is the recovery?

He can't lift anything for, like, a month, so he can't, like, do anything with our… He can't do anything. He is useless for the next, like, four to five weeks. Right. Can he walk lightly? Yes. He's walking. Can he shower?

He can shower now. What do you want to know, Yasik? Anything else? He's shitting fine. What else do you want to know? I don't know if we're allowed to have sex. I have no idea about that. Well, I would imagine you can't because you have to use, like, some abdominal-like motion

when you thrust. Yeah. No one wants to fuck Weekend at Bernie. I get it. Okay. Anyway, so there's that. So, and then long-term, what happens? Does he have to take anything?

No. Supplements? No. Okay, then the fucking thing is useless, Sash. Like, if you can take the goddamn organ out and you don't have to take supplements or you don't have to change your diet or, like, eat anything, then, like, there's no function to it. Okay.

Okay, Dr. Louie. Done. Sure. Thank you for indulging my… Okay, good. You know I love this shit. I know you do. Can we just move on from Justin?

Oh, from Justin. Can we move on and just quickly talk about Justin Timberlake, who we said we were going to talk about in our first podcast, I know, but we only have to do this just quickly because his album's out this Friday and then the fucking Super Bowl. Fine. Like, what do you want to say? Well, what do you want to say? Are you into anything?

Has anything… I… No. You've given me… Like, the Say Anything song? Say Something song? Say Something song. I thought was decent, the strongest of the three he's released.

Yeah. But most of that is Chris Stapleton. Who, by the way, I actually never knew. I mean, I've heard his name in the periphery of whatever. Yeah. But what Justin Timberlake did for me was make me a Chris Stapleton fan. Yeah. I was like, oh, I'm not going to buy your album, but I'm actually going to buy Chris

Stapleton's album. Of course. Did you know Chris Stapleton? Yes. I've been aware of him and have some of his music. I'm not like a super fan, but he's very talented. The music is very good. And he outshines JT on this.

On JT's song. Like he makes the song. Without Chris Stapleton on that song, it's like blah, blah, whatever. So the other day I was listening to Senorita. Do you remember Senorita? Yes. And then that is the Justin Timberlake I miss. And that song was very like rootsy and grassrootsy and yet with a little bit of flavor.

It's just such a shame. He is a big disappointment. I guess that's all I wanted to say. He's a big disappointment as an artist right now and as a human being. Yeah. So essentially also useless. He's an appendix. Yes, there we go.

See, it needed to come together. Jess and Tim were like, he's an appendix. Perfect. Okay, so let's get to our letters because we've missed so many. So we're going to do three today. Yeah, you're reading. Okay. Here we go.

Dear Sasha and Lainey, I've been best friends with a guy since we were little kids. Every winter, we're up at our cottage every weekend, spending all of our time together. Come December, we're best friends, but by April, we barely talk to one another. The catch is every time I see him, I get butterflies and I really like him. We've been so close for so long, so I don't want to tell him how I feel because I'm really afraid I'd ruin the friendship, which I cherish. All my city friends say I should grow a pair and just be honest, but I think it would change everything in our dynamic, which I don't want.

The guy and I talk about everything with one another, but he always talks about other girls with me. When I mention another guy, he shuts down the guy right away. I have no clue what I should do. Do you think there's the slightest chance he could like me? Is it even worth risking the friendship? Sincerely, F. Okay, F. Well, I'm curious. Have you ever fallen for a guy friend? Yeah. Oh, really? Like, for sure. Oh, okay. Many times. I mean, through high school, through university. And then did you ever move that friendship into relationship zone? No. Oh, so you have been heartbroken. I've been like, yeah, I, the last guy this happened with, um, he actually lives really close to us and I'm friends with him now, like not super close friends,

but, um, and, uh, and I've been to his wedding. I'm like, okay. Um, and he knows, like we had, We had a hilarious laugh about this. Oh, this is amazing. So… So you guys were actually legitimately friends. Yeah. So it was our last year of university and we were just, like, not doing jack shit all. Yeah.

Like, our last year… Like, during our last year of university. So he had two roommates. His name is Tim. Okay. He had two roommates and he lived in a building where, like, a whole bunch of people lived And I'd be over there every single night. We'd stay up until like 3 or 4 in the morning.

We'd go bowling. We'd just… You know, you're 21 years old, 22 years old. Like, everything seems like there are no limits. It was reality bites. Oh. Okay. Right?

Okay. And I started crushing on him so hard because we were just getting to know each other that year. We hadn't hung out at all for the first three years. Okay. And then in our fourth year, like, I was like, I'm super, super fucking into – like, I'm so into this guy. Yeah.

Then he started seeing this girl and her name was Elaine. Stop. Was she also Asian? Yes. Really? Yes. Okay. She was younger than we were and so then I couldn't do anything because, like, what

am I going to do? I'm not going to be that person. Okay. So I was, like, really, really hard crushing on him and it was one of those, like, in your stomach. Yeah. Like, you feel… You know, we all went to one of those…

I don't know if they do this anymore, but in university back in my day, like, every six months we'd have a semi-formal, just like high school. You did? Like, some sort of… Yeah. What fucking weirdo university is that? You have a dance. Because there are different clubs.

Like, we were part of the, like, Chinese Students Association and then, like, the Korean Association, like, Students Association. And you guys would have, like, a midterm prom? They would have, like, parties for a fun… Like, a fundraiser and you dress up and, like, they'd rent a fucking restaurant and go and whatever. And Tim went with Elaine and I went with his roommate because we were just friends and my cousin Kat came up from Toronto and like hung out and so we partied all night and I

was like, oh my God, why is he with her? And then I started dating someone else like a couple months later and… And then you forgot about him? Totally forgot about… Like not forgot, but Tim and I were still friends, really like seeing each other all the time and hanging out, but all those feelings went away. Okay, so now that you've talked to Tim and you've told him that you liked him, did he reciprocate those feelings? Was he like, oh, well, I wish you would have told me.

He was like, why didn't you say anything? Okay, yeah. So this is interesting. Because he wasn't that into Elaine. Okay. But he would have been into you, Elaine. Did he kind of say that? There would have been an option.

Did he allude to that? Okay. Like, it could have been a possibility. But his mention – but he mentioned, hey, like, you should have told me. Yes, he said that. Well, then fucking there's the fucking answer to this advice question. Well, listen. I don't think so.

These kids are family friends. Okay. So they've spent a childhood together. That's even more hot. I don't think so. Oh, Jacek, breaking news, everyone. What? Jacek says that he did not know this tidbit about Tim, their neighbor, who Elaine loved

at one point. Oh my God, this is drama. Oh. I have a crush on Tim. I'm sorry, Jacek's whispering. Jacek's whispering. Okay, Jacek's whispering. He said, I didn't know this about Tim.

And then he just pointed to the fact that Elaine is raising her voice. Oh, she's red. I don't think I'm red. You're actually not. You might be. Yeah. I don't know what he's saying, but I don't actually get red. Okay, but…

Anyway, Sasha's eyes and I'm not red. Anyway, so with Tim, remember, like, Tim and I only sort of started hanging out in fourth year. Okay. Like, we weren't intertwined. You weren't really actually real, legit friends for a long time. Like, if these kids are spending time with each other every year at the cottage, this is a family situation.

Yep. Or this is, there's history here that I don't know if you want to kill. Yeah, but you know what? What's going to happen now is she is like, oh, I don't, what did she say? Like, I don't want to, I don't want to, what'd she say? Sorry, let me, okay, this is what she says. I don't want to tell him how I feel because I'm really afraid I'd ruin the friendship. There you go.

Yeah, but don't you find that, like, her feelings are real? The friendship's ruined. The friendship's not happening. Now that she's changed the dynamic, that now she can't legit be his friend because now she wants to be his girlfriend. Like, she wants something else. So that's why I'm like, I just gave you proof that like after you crush on somebody, you can go back to liking them as a friend and then be friends with them and continue

to be friends with them and go to their wedding eventually. But there are a shit ton of people out there who I'm sure are listening who'd be like, you know what? I took the chance. I did like profess my feelings and then we got together and we were madly deeply in love and we got fucking married and we have 18 children. Like that is another side of the story too. And as you just pointed out, Tim was like, homegirl, why didn't you fucking tell me?

So maybe, I mean, it obviously worked out the way it was supposed to, but he was curious to know. So why wouldn't this guy want to know too? I mean, the fact that he gets all fucking like, you know, weirdo when she talks about guys alludes to the fact that maybe he has a bit of a jealous bone, which would then also, oh, you don't like this, where I'm going with this. No, but finish your thought. Well, I feel like maybe he could be reciprocating some feelings and just hasn't really thought

that he would have a chance. That's very possible. Maybe he… I don't read it the same way. I read it that it's possible that he shuts her down every time she starts talking about guys because he sees her as a little sister. And, like, if you know anybody who has, like, a dude who has a little sister, no older brother type wants to hear, like, his little sister talking about dudes.

But the same could be said for a guy if he likes her. He doesn't want to hear her talking about other dudes. That is a possibility as well. No, he would ask. He'd be like, are you still seeing that guy? Is that guy still in the picture? He wouldn't just not want to talk about it at all. He would want the research.

He would be like, so what's he like? What friend is that so grossed out that doesn't want to hear about their friend liking somebody? When you grow up with somebody and you go to the cottage every year and you see that person as like a family member. We're talking about a guy who's hanging out seemingly with a girlfriend during summer in a bikini. She's got tits. Like, I'm sure she's like, he knows that she's a woman. It's not like he's like, oh, you look, I think of you as two years old. Guys don't do that. Right. So why wouldn't he have made a move by now if he was into it?

Because maybe she is intimidating and maybe she gives off real, like, for me, lots of guys have always said, oh, I would have never thought that you were interested because you don't give off anything. So I've had to a lot of the time in my like finding a guy, I've had to like pull them aside and be like, you're going to be my boyfriend because I fucking like you. And they were like, what? Like they wouldn't, they didn't know. So maybe she's so aloof that she doesn't give off any vibes. So he just does his own thing. Oh, I really don't like that we're split on this. So what's the plan? I think the plan should be fine. If we can be in agreement, I don't think she should be like, one day I really like you.

Let's date. No. But next summer, this seemingly seems like a summer thing, start to fucking like put the vibe out there. And if our writer is sort of like me, who's like really holds her emotions quite close… No, no. It's happening right now. They're winter cottage people.

Oh, they're winter cottage. Oh, there's no bikinis? No. She has from now until April. Okay. Well, then fucking just start… Fine. No bikinis.

Fires. Fires. Put on like really good pajamas. Yeah. Yeah. Start looking really cute and putting some effort into like more discussions, more flirty discussions with him and fucking throw that out. See if he fucking bites a little bit. Oh my God. I have like a dirty young adult romance that is exactly this storyline. Oh. A chalet shacking of sorts?

Fuck. What's it called? Let me just look it up for a second. I read it like, I don't know, five years ago. And I mean, is this inspiration for her? I'm not saying it's the best book ever, but it like involves Apres Ski and family friends and crushes and like some horn dogging. This sounds ideal. The sex scenes in this are written. What is… Oh, okay. It's… How do you have that so quickly? Because I remembered the title, but I couldn't remember the name of the author. Okay. The title of the book, you're going to love this is Frigid. Ooh. That sounds right on my tongue. Yeah. And the author is Jennifer Armantrout.

Okay. Anyway, I… So could she pick up some tips from this? Yeah. You know me. I binge like all these dirty books. Yes. Yeah. So let me just read you the synopsis because you're going to be like, oh my God. This is so… No, are you ready? I'm so ready. I'm like ready to blow your mind. I know, If we have any questions, you're like, well, let me just tell you about this fucking gross porn book I was reading. It's not gross. Okay, go. Okay, ready?

For 21-year-old Sydney… Oh, fuck. Okay. For 21-year-old Sydney, being in love with Kyler isn't anything new. They've been best friends ever since he pushed her down on the playground and she made him eat a mud pie. Isn't this… Okay.

Exactly. Somewhere over the years, she fell for him and fell hard. The big problem with that, Kyler puts the man in man-whore. He's never stayed with a girl longer than a few nights, and with it being their last year in college, Sid doesn't want to risk their friendship by declaring her love. Come on! Okay, and what happens? Kyler has always put Sid on a pedestal that was too high for him to reach.

To him, she's perfect and she's everything, but the feelings he has for her, he's always hidden away or focused on any other female. After all, Kyler will always be the poor boy from the wrong side of the tracks, and Sid will always be the one girl he can never have, but when they're stranded together at a posh ski resort due to a massive nor'easter. There's nothing stopping their red-hot feelings for each other from coming to the service. Can their friendship

survive the attraction? Better yet, can they survive it all? Because as the snow falls, someone is stalking them. Okay, I don't want you to have a stalker F, but isn't this exactly the plot? Okay, read the book. Read the book. Tell us if it lines up to your life.

But would you be in agreement with me that she should at least try to subtly put it out there that she would like, you know, like dangle it a little bit, dangle her feelings a little bit more than she probably has. I'm sure she's been trying to keep it like all right and tight in there, but maybe she should let loose a little bit and fish for a little bit of affection from him. Do you agree? I agree now that like… That a porn book has come in. Okay. You've turned me around and like you've made me see this as like, you know, a rom-com. And now that I've seen

this as a rom-com, yes, dangle it, as you said. You know, I don't know. What is the expression here? I don't know. Just put your fucking pussy out. Pull out some feelers. Yes. And let us know how it goes. Let us know if your life turns into the book I just recommended. Frigid. Okay, next. Dear Sasha, I'm going to try to keep my story in question as short as possible. I'm in a 10-year relationship, which was tumultuous 80% of the time, and therefore mostly on and off. He and I came together when he was 17 and I was 19, so we were pretty young and had

this toxic will-they-won't-they situation. The last two years we got our shit together and since then it's ongoing. He quit his studies at 21, has worked since then successfully as a musician, and And I lived in three different cities and two countries while doing my bachelor's and master's. Congratulations. Last year I moved back from London to my hometown in Germany and I basically moved into his apartment.

So I guess it's maybe legit and normal that couples have their issues when they move in together. However, here's the issue. Turns out my BF is a chauvinistic idiot. I'm the woman. Therefore, according to him, I will do 90% of the household. He's male. It's normal that it's my job and it's natural that I have a bigger desire and need

for the apartment to be clean. I can't, I just can't. Okay, so there's more description of how entitled he is and how much more vacuuming and cleaning that she has to do. And now she's looking for a job because she's finished her studies and there are times when she's too busy doing that and he doesn't help out. So she needs some help because she doesn't have any more words for this as I am simultaneously gobsmacked and angry and hurt. Is this a reason to break up? I mean, if he has such views about the household, who knows what I'm going to hear when we maybe have kids

or God forbid I decide I maybe don't want any. So what do you think? Is this normal? Your opinion would be appreciated. Lots of love from Germany, Jay. Okay, Jay. I feel like this one is a rip the bandaid off situation. Is this a reason to break up?

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I wish I want to… I wish I had more to say about this, but… Well, we could. We could, of course, elaborate, but… Here's why. The most basic thing is his values and his idea of what a relationship looks like,

although I don't agree with them. Those are his. I suppose he's entitled to them. They do not align with yours. Yeah. The end. The end. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that that is as simple as it gets because really there are women out there and there are men out there who like to fall into those traditional roles and that's fine. But if our writer doesn't subscribe to those things, then it's a no-go. It's a deal breaker. And to even question being in a relationship with someone like this, to have a future with him, like you're just setting yourself up for fucking misery. um so don't so don't bother don't bother anymore just and that fucking sucker no it doesn't need to be a part of your life anymore no like germany i hear you and of course you're you're on the surface question was is this normal do i break up with him i think underneath though what we're getting at is like what's taking you so long yeah um you're angry like your email is like i can't even, I can't even over and over again. Like, so if you can't even, how can you? And the good thing

too is like, fuck, at least you found out now. Can you imagine if you like did the whole marriage baby thing with him and then you were fucking stuck with him? Fucking hallelujah that you found this out, that he showed his cards, that you don't want to fucking play the game anymore. Yeah. I'd get out. But you know what? I also want to, I'm taking a leap and I'm assuming here, But I also think Jay from Germany is a little digmatized. He's got like the musician thing going on and I guess he's, I mean, he sounds like he's super old fashioned. So there must be some of that possessive, you know, like all these dudes.

My girl. Yeah. My girl. And this is what you need to do and whatnot. And listen, we all on our, I hate this expression, journey of figuring out what we want, in somebody else had to like go through the shit that we didn't want. And like when I was 17 or 18, yeah, it was kind of cute sometimes to me if a guy would be like all possessive and, you know, ragey and be like, who are you looking at? Are you looking at my girl? Don't look at my girl.

Yeah. You want to fight? Yeah. And then like miraculously six months later, I turned 19 and was like, that is so lame. Like, I hate you. So you're going through that right now. You're figuring out what you want and don't want in a person. And what you've very clearly stated to us is you don't want somebody who expects a woman who is at home, who does all the work, and her partner doesn't contribute. Yeah. So… That sounds like a fair mindset to have.

And hey, some people enjoy that and it's great for them. You don't. So get out of that apartment, find your own apartment while you're finding a job. It's a very exciting time for you. You're young, you have a master's degree and you're educated. You have all kinds of opportunity. I'm not worried about you. I will worry about you if you're in this situation in another two years.

So, get to it. Chop, chop. Good luck. Hi, Lainey and Sasha. Of course, I'm writing to you both as I need your help. I'm 38, married, and have two wonderful children, eight and three. I'm lucky as my husband has a well-paying job, which has allowed me to stay at home and raise our children all these years.

But now that my children are a bit older, I have taken it upon myself to start my own business. Good for you. It's a business of home decor, and I'm truly proud of myself that I was able to make a long-time dream come true. It's been hard starting a business, but I've learned so much, and I can't wait to expand and grow, but here's the thing. My mother-in-law treats my store like it's her own personal gifting center. Oh, I love this. If it's a friend's birthday, a baby shower,

a funeral, she literally calls on me to hook her up. I, of course, don't mind giving her things at cost here and there, but this is a business, something that is also supporting her grandchildren, and I'm not sure how to tell her that she needs to start paying for these things like a regular customer as opposed to thinking she could just roll up and take what she wants. I really do love her and we've never had issues in the past, but I feel like she's taking advantage of the situation to a point where it's starting to irk me. I don't want to cause friction. I don't want to be looked at as a cheap bitch, but I also need to say something, but I don't know how. My husband knows how I feel about this, but he doesn't think it's a big deal. So I turn to you two. What do

you think? Should I say something or do I keep quiet while my mother-in-law basically steals from me? This is great. There are certain people who have this mentality of like, family, give it to me. And especially in the world that we live in with like social media and like influencers and stuff, people always just want shit for free. I also love free things, but I would never do this. This is mortifying to me. But it's interesting. It's interesting because you don't want to ruffle any feathers. You don't want her to fucking give you the stink guy. And she clearly doesn't think there's anything wrong with it. No. So yeah. I think if it happens once in a while, it's fine. This just seems to be happening like more than once in a

while. And I feel like she's maybe taking advantage of it because it's new. It's seemingly a new business. Yeah. So maybe your mother-in-law's like, hey, hey, this is new. I can always just go in and grab something, no big deal. And I think that as you said, like if it's happening once in a while, whatever, I think if this happens in year two, year three of your business, then you absolutely need to say something. Because as someone who is a small business owner myself, like I always feel bad that I can't give like goods to my friends or to my family. Like, fuck, I got my mom and my sister to pay for one. I wasn't giving them a fucking free perfume. Right. So I think it has to, it should be said that, or known through her husband to

his mother that like, you can't go in and fucking pilfer shit. Like you got to fucking pay for some stuff, at least at cost. Well, I, I, I'm thinking about the, the point you made that this is new and her mother is like, um, her mother is, she treats my store like it's her personal gifting center. A friend's birthday, a baby shower, a funeral. She literally calls on me to hook her up. At a certain point in a new business, and if you have a mother-in-law who has connections and all kinds of friends, it is sort of PR, right? Like, oh, here, I got this for you at my daughter-in-law's new store. It's on Main Street. You're going to love it. Isn't this a wonderful vase? You're saying mother… Picture frame.

Treat mother-in-law as like an influencer, as I just said. Well, as you said, for the first little while, when this gets to a certain point, and this is like V is our writer here, V, you have to decide what's the point, like when that point is, then you might need to be like, oh, hey, mother-in-law, do you want me to open an account for you at a discount? That's a really good idea. Yeah. Like make it feel special.

Like I personalize a friends and family discount code for you. So whenever you need something, just call the front desk and just – yes, that is a good, good idea. So – and look, it doesn't have to be that blunt. You can like massage it and be like, hey, we're low on inventory right now. My suppliers – I don't know, make up some shit. Whatever. Like my suppliers are only sending things like, I don't know.

Small quantity. Small quantities at a time. so I really need to have, like, in-store stock, but hey, this is your discount, is that going to be okay? That would be, I would hope, like, one way to go about it. And I think the key, too, is what you said, which is, like, not right away. Like, see if maybe, yeah, like, if your mother-in-law is fucking seeding gifts out there and you can see people coming into your store because of her.

There might be a return for this. Who knows? Yes. Like, I don't know who your mother-in-law is, but she sounds like she's got some friends. And if that ends up being the case, then you actually might end up at a certain point breaking even soon and then turning a profit. But I do get the anxiety of it. I do.

Because you're like, you just want to fucking make some dough. Yeah. Or you just want to cover your costs. And when that doesn't happen, like, you start to freak out, especially when it's like this new venture. Yeah. And, you know, I kind of, you know, I don't, my mother-in-law would never do that, but like my dad would.

My dad would come into my store or wherever I worked and be like, why wouldn't you give this to me for free? So I understand that mentality of people who are like, but why can't you hook me up? Like, but yes, you have to, you have to set some ground rules. And I think that that will be, give it another, give it another year. Give it another year and see if, if she's still fucking like kleptoing shit. I will say this though. I think there's a bigger issue to keep an eye on is I don't love that your husband isn't supporting you in this, that he doesn't think it's such a big deal. And I'm not

trying to cause shit in your marriage. I'm not saying he doesn't love you and is like choosing his mother over you, but you stayed at home with the kids for a long time. He has a good salary. and now this is something that you're doing for your work. And given his flippant attitude and given your mother-in-law's flippant attitude, I wonder if the issue here is they're not taking you seriously as an entrepreneur. And this happens to women who are rejoining the workforce. Many women out there have decided to put their career on pause, they stay home with the kids, and then they want to rejoin the workforce, start their own business,

and people, you know, people laugh it off or patronize them. Like, your husband… I'm not trying to cause shit here, but I want to know how seriously the people in your life are taking… how seriously you are taking it. Like, in your email, you sound super passionate about your business. You're like, I am here. It's a dream. I'm learning so much. You want this to be a thing, a career. I don't know if the people in your life are actually getting that. And that's why I think it's important to confront it like a fucking boss, right? Is you come up with these strategies like Lainey has offered up with this code or whatever, and you fucking boss up and you take it seriously. Like you don't kowtow to this. You don't let her fucking walk all over

you. You know, like let it breathe for a second, see if it simmers down. And then as we said, if it doesn't, then you, yeah, you are a CEO of your company. But same with your husband. You got to, same with your husband. Like if this is not the situation, then fine. Tell me to fuck off. But your last question, your last statement was, my husband knows how I feel about this, but he doesn't think it's a big deal. He doesn't think it's a big deal that you've started a company and have to give away your merchandise for free to his mother. And he himself is somebody who has a good job. You said that my husband has a well-paying job. So I'm going to assume that he fucking knows what business is. So I think that at a certain point you might need to turn around

and say to your husband, hey, dude, this isn't a fucking hobby for me. You have a job, I have a fucking job. I take your job seriously, take my job seriously. We want your business to be successful. But in order for it to be successful, you need to start presenting, like presenting as an entrepreneur. So it could be smart business to let your mother-in-law like be your free advertisement for a while. Like lots of new businesses give away free product. Of course. Yeah, exactly. Let that sit for a while. But in the interim, your attitude and your presentation of what this business is, do not let people make you feel like this isn't serious shit. because it is. I like that. Let's end on that note. Great. On that note, hope your appendixes

are healthy. Yes. Or I hope your appendices, appendixes? I don't know. Appendices. Appendixes? Let's just say I hope your appendix is fine. Okay. All of your appendices. For all of you who have an appendix, I hope it's fine. But if they weren't and you did get a snapshot of your gross, like, inflamed appendix, we would like to see that, right? Oh, God. Yeah. Maybe we'll do a contest. Maybe we'll do a contest.

Whoever says… An appendix beauty contest. The grossest appendix, I will tie in all this stuff to these questions together. I will give a free perfume to the grossest appendix. Love that. Love that. What a great first Sasha Answers contest. Thanks for listening.

Keep your questions and comments coming to Sasha at LadyCossack.com. leave comments on google play and on itunes and we'll be back next week bye