What's Your Drama - Michelle Williams, Pussy Line Up, & Work Husbands

Episode Date: June 22, 2018

Welcome back to the Sasha Answers Podcast!On today's show: Could you pick your pussy out of a line up? I thought I could but as we all find out together, I don't even know what mine looks like. After that we get to your questions! Living your life without guilt, sketchy work relationships, and what to do when you have an overbearing boss.Thanks for tuning and keep your feedback/questions coming to me at [e-mail] and hit us up on twitter at @sasha_tong and @laineygossip and Instagram at @lostandfoundapothecary and @laineygossip. And of course on iTunes, Google Play, and Spotify. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi it's Lainey. Hi it's Sasha. And welcome to the Lainey Gossip Podcast for Sasha Answers. Yay! It's Friday and we're taping this on Thursday and we did something really special together. Like something that might bond us for life. Yes. We were already bonded for life like let's not okay yeah but extra extra um we together were on a shoot with a child of destiny michelle williams michelle williams yes and laney who was so nice was um on vacation came out of vacation to do this interview she likes to tell me this all the time um but it was pretty fucking awesome right like listen i'll be honest michelle williams is my least favorite destiny's child uh member i i would say that like you know in terms of popularity there's beyonce yes then

there's kelly and then there's michelle sure i think that that is everyone knows poor michelle yeah um but but it was lovely oh like i for me she's challenging kelly now yes because she was so nice um so chill there was no 18 person entourage what was awesome is she came in and She didn't know she was actually going to be doing an on-camera interview, it seemed like. And she was like, oh, she was a bit shocked to see us all set up, but no fucking big deal. She was camera ready. She like fucked around with her hair a bit, then was like, no, I'm going to put a cap

on and like talk about the work that you and Duanna like to talk about. She came in, you know, without any really pretense of anything and fucking was ready to go. Super cute. Yeah. Great pants. Great pants. Survivor pants, as I noted.

Great pants from Urban Outfitters, she said. really good makeup and really candid we talked about her mental health struggles yep she even dished a little bit about beyonce and jay-z we love her we love her she's now number she's number two and she was super nice good eye contact shook hands with everybody on the crew did she smell nice did you smell her yeah i mean not overwhelmingly nice but i mean she didn't stink okay great I figured so much. But, yeah, she smelled fresh. I really like that, you know, she was happy to meet people and not be like, okay, I'm

just talking to the person I'm talking to and I just don't want to deal with anybody else. But also not, like, begging to be your best friend either. Although, like, who would? If you're already friends with Beyonce, why would you be begging to be friends with anybody? With us. Yeah, that's true. and I feel like

both of us while it was happening I just kept hearing like I'm a survivor totally it was it's so weird

seeing somebody like like someone who just everything in my bone resonates with Destiny's Child so to see her is just so much

fucking fun it was such a fun day but also I think that I've spent many many many months if you add up all the time

like if you add up all the times that I've watched Destiny's Child videos and performances like if you stack up the hours and minutes and whatnot it would probably

end up like being a year straight like 24 hours a day straight and then to see that person and you're so familiar with them in a way that is like probably weird in that that was the first day she laid eyes on us right

meanwhile in my head I'm revisiting every fucking outfit every dance move yeah every high note um so yeah that was that was a highlight of our week yeah um can we talk oh i just want to make sure when you texted me and you're like um michelle williams interview and i'm like i'm off that day and she you're like fuck and i said um but i'll do it which means i like i still would have i was docked a holiday day but i just Dick just came in to do that. But my text to you was like, to be clear, DC, Michelle Williams, right? Because it's interesting that you wouldn't have come in for Michelle Williams, Busy Phillips,

Michelle Williams. Not for my fucking holiday. You're crazy. I guess so. I know. But I would come in for Busy Phillips. The strange thing is, but Michelle Williams, no, because I don't think I like that interview wouldn't be like a thing, right?

It's true. Yeah. I wish she was so, I wish she would show us who she was. I love her. Like, I think that she's really interesting behind closed doors. But I wish that she would open that fucking door once in a while. I think that's enough for Busy to show us. I guess, like, that's the only time she does is when she's with Busy, right?

I love Busy Phillips. I never thought I would. Can we talk about something else that I really am interested in these days? Have you been watching Jada Pinkett Smith's talk show? I haven't watched too much of it, like, press play. but I read about, I mean, it seems like every week there's a new headline, right? Like, I don't know, the time Willow walked in on Jada and Will having sex. And then the time Willow did this.

And then they had Jaden on the show too, who was like seemingly likable. I mean, I know Kathleen loves him. I have never liked him, but it's nice to see him not be a weirdo carrying a lock of hair or his like gold albums. Sure. But anyway, so this latest one, which was fucking hilarious, Well, they were talking about vaginal rejuvenation. Right.

Like her headline was, I'm in my 40s, but my pussy is 16. Right. Yes. Which is great. But I… I don't think she used the word pussy. No. She said her like…

She has like some nickname for it. Okay. I don't know. It's basically she was like, it's my heart chakra or something. She was talking about it being… Right. No, her root chakra. Her vagina is her root chakra.

So, yeah. I… This is the thing that we're going to talk about, right? Vaginal rejuvenation. How you… So it's kind of like anti-aging for your boon. Yeah. Yes.

Well, what I… Okay. So there's, I guess, many different levels of vaginal rejuvenation. One, for hanging curtains. Okay. Zipping those curtains up and making them tight and right. And then, like, internal rejuvenation so that, like, your hole's tighter. Do you know my…

Listen, I'm not an expert on this. I'm sort of looking at you to, like, help me and walk me through what the fuck this shit is. Well, fuck. And would you do it? How would I know? I don't know. I was coming to you for fucking vaginal rejuvenation.

No, I know nothing. Okay, so I do think there's the cosmetic surgery for, like, your cooters. And is that because you've pushed out some children? And I don't mean to be disrespectful. The cosmetic, like, no, like, the B-flaps. Thank you. Curtain flaps. I like B-flaps.

The B-flaps. The beef flaps are for cosmetic only. But do they get saggy or loosey-goosey when you've had kids? Is that what happens? I've never heard of fucking pussy flaps getting saggy because you've had a kid. Like, I've never heard that. But, hey, everybody out there, let us know. That said, even people who haven't had kids, like for a while, a few years back,

They were fucking promoting pussy flap surgery because women were thinking they had ugly pussies. And back then, I was like, really? Because first of all, how often do you look at your pussy? Zero. Honest to God, zero. I couldn't identify my own pussy from a lineup. Me neither.

Right? Me neither. They put out a list of 10 pussies. I would be like, I don't know who's my… I do not know what my pussy looks like. Oh my God. You know what? I feel like that's a really important thing that we should probably investigate.

Identifying, pussy identification? Pussy identification. I would like a pussy lineup to be like, I would like to know myself, I would like to know myself enough to know which one was my labia. I'm going to ask Joanna this on her podcast. What? If she knows, if she could pick out her pussy. um anyway so but so there are women who and this was i think because there were so many

unrealistic pussy standards set up by porn like i guess porn stars are considered to have really pretty pussies and so women were like oh my pussy's so ugly that the guy i'm with maybe will be turned off by my pussy which let me finish because if a guy is gonna not stick it in you because he thinks your pussy is ugly like i don't know any dudes any dudes who'd be like yeah i didn't fuck her because like her pussy was a four and i'm used to pussies that are like at least eight and that's my question i don't know what a four pussy is in comparison to an eight pussy me neither but i guess it's like i don't know i guess it's not wrinkly like but wrinkly from what i remember of my pussy i've always had wrinkly flaps um i think there's no getting around

that i no one has like like um like poreless well it's because you don't watch porn and okay so then So tell me, what does a porn pussy look like? Like, you know, the high-end porn pussy, like, close-ups are all really, like, trimmed. Trimmed. Not just the hair. I mean, like, the skin is even… Like, pulled back. Like a facelift.

No, I wouldn't say it's pulled back, because you don't want it open. You just don't want… Yeah, like, it's… Like a ball… It's taut. Like, on, like, balls. Like, ball sacks. Yeah.

It's not, like, extra skin. Yeah, exactly. Not old person skin. Exactly. Okay. Some of them are like, you know, wrinkly and normal. I'm just so surprised. But I don't find.

Who gives a fuck? Yeah. What guy is like, exactly? Do you care? What? Is this too much? How much porn pussy do you look at? Yassik's asking how much porn pussy.

I probably look at more porn pussy. Okay. And so what do you say? So Yassik's saying he looks at more porn pussy than I do. And so what, Yassik, can you weigh in on. I'm just walking into, like, bullshit land further and further. Excuse me. So what's your point?

What's your point? What would you like to interject? Have you met your wife? Of course she dissected that shit. She's always hiding it. It's not that I'm hiding it. It's just that, like, we don't have to talk about it. By the time you come upstairs, it's over.

Where are we going with this? Anyway. anyway so there's that pussy rejuvenation yes and then i guess there's the internal the yeah if you've pushed out some kids and you want to be fucking tighter that makes see that makes sense to me i think if i had like a loose hole because it had squeezed out a couple of humans or for whatever reason i would understand why you'd want to rejuvenate the circumference of that again Okay, but I feel like I've read somewhere from doctors who are like, it shrinks back. Yeah.

Okay, but maybe it doesn't shrink back to like when you were 16. But how would you know that? Because it hurts, right? Why would it hurt if it was… It's not hurt, but like you would be able to feel the dick go in as opposed to like, I don't know if that's up there or not. Okay. No, I'm being serious.

I think that that is the case. You think that birthing after birth, it doesn't, because it goes back, Sash. I know it goes back, but maybe it doesn't go back to the original state that it was. To the point where like someone could be inside you and you don't know? Maybe. Maybe. I don't think so. I don't think so.

I don't think that it could be. Fine. It doesn't have to be. It doesn't have to be to the point where someone has a dick in you and you're like, are you there yet? Fine. I'm being a little bit extreme. but enough so

that it's not as tight as it used to be so I guess I'm just saying that I would understand why people would get

the rejuvenation for that I don't what how what are you talking about if it didn't feel as good as it did

post kid push out wouldn't you want it to feel do you think well I mean for the woman for the woman

okay good I'm talking about the dude yeah exactly no no okay no this is all just for the woman fine

fine sure we're in so that's it moral of the story we're in for the internal external we don't understand shit but also moral of the story anyway a few take-home things for homework for everybody if you have had pussy rejuvenation please let us know inside or outside but specifically inside give us details details because you know we haven't had kids so not sure if you would still feel the dick inside of you. Yeah. I would like to know.

I would also, followed up with that, would like to know, would you bother getting an outside vaginal rejuvenation while you're in the inside? Fuck it, who cares? Do you care so much about your fucking labia that you would go so far as to get a facelift for them? Well, I was going to say,

hey everybody should we start identifying our pussies like knowing what she looks like i i feel like that's a really good thing to do just for like shits and giggles it's just such an like it's a fucking weird because how would you exactly like your bathroom mirror is up on a counter like right i don't think most people have a full length against the the sink full length mirror that's weird and it's also really awkward to like have that right so then go then you go let's say you're doing it in your bedroom and it's your like closet then you have to go down on the ground yeah scoot right you have to scoot right up against the mirror i'm you would scoot right and then and then like somehow curve your head over into like a c formation to see it or

you lie in bed and then you get like a mirror you know whatever handheld mirror and stick it down there but then i still feel like you have to contort your neck a little bit to get in the angle Yeah. I feel like I would like to… I guess with iPhones now, you could just snap the pic, like stick it down there. But I feel like it's more fun to do it out of a lineup. I don't know if I want that in my cloud. No, fuck no.

No. Exactly. But for… Actually, I wouldn't… You know what? I think I should… Yeah. It should go up in the cloud.

How many pussy pictures do you think are up in the cloud? An infinite amount. Yeah. So no one's going to be able to ID my pussy. If I can't ID my pussy… That's true. In the cloud. Okay.

I feel like we've gone nowhere with this, but gone so many other places. Okay. You are going to read questions this week. Oh, fine. Dear Sasha and Lainey, I'm not really sure how I'm going to lay this out, but here it goes. I'm 32 years old, and I live with my mom and younger siblings, two brothers and a sister. Brothers are in their mid-20s, and sister is still in high school.

My dad left when I was 15, but since he was in and out for a few years before that, it's always been up to me to be the man of the house. here's my problem. I feel trapped. Even writing those words feels like I'm betraying my mom. She's been ill for a few years now and has medication, a long list. She doesn't work, but still manages to do everything around the house. What we fight about are my two brothers in their mid-20s who don't work, haven't worked since they were out of high school, and don't plan to work at all. My brothers and I have a difficult relationship, mostly stemming from me being the disciplinarian when they were younger, which I admit I didn't handle well.

ever since they were younger I was told to stay out of their business and they will stay out of mine both of them have been dealing with various levels of PTSD anxiety and depression I was sympathetic when they were younger but now it's just too much my mom treats them like precious flowers that will disintegrate and is terrified of losing them I don't know what to do I can't abandon my mom and sister but holy fuck this has gotten out of hand I'm saddled with a responsibility I never wanted nor asked for. I did everything I was supposed to do. I went to college, got a job, bought a house,

and now here I am feeling stuck. I feel like I'm not living for myself. I never went away to college, a fantasy when I was in high school, never had an active social life because of my responsibilities at home. And now that in my 30s, I've become resentful. I know I shouldn't.

I can't blame others for decisions I made. And I feel like such a traitor to my mom who did everything for me growing up. And I just can't leave my sister who's a smart go-getter and expect her to fend for herself right when she's about to graduate high school and start college. I selfishly tried to encourage her to move away. I selfishly tried to encourage her to move away for school, but for messed up cultural reasons, girls are not allowed to do that. I have one card to play and that is to kick them, my brothers, out if they don't get

off their asses, but I'm 99% sure my mom will go with them and take my sister with her. How do I have this conversation with my mom without seeming like a total jerk? Thanks. Okay, well, that's a lot. You're such a good guy. I know. Whoever you are. What's a good guy name? Well, I was going to say this reminds me so much of Charlie from Party of Five that I feel like we can call him Charlie.

Yes. Don't you think? Yes. I hope Charlie is of age to remember Party of Five because this feels very reminiscent of that. And I feel like Charlie, our writer, has just taken on so much and is continuing to saddle so much fucking baggage of everybody of his whole family. And I, while I respect that, I also am like, want to yell like, run free, like, just escape it. He deserves to live his life and carve out his own path without having to feel like he needs to take care of everyone else before himself.

Yeah, but then he's like, my mom's sick and… But… And then the… Like, the baby sister. I know. But sometimes you have to go and live your life. um you can't be there to take care of everybody and we've talked about this before you can't take care of everybody without taking care of yourself and he these are all people who are going to be

on their own other like they all have their own life paths like he can't cradle them their whole way that's not healthy for them and it's not healthy for him um so for me it's like it'll be hard you'll feel major massive amounts of guilt leaving your family but it's something that you're going to need to do because the resentment cut to in a decade will eat you up so much that I fear that you will write us again and be in such a deep, dark depression because you never got to live your life. And no one's, it doesn't seem like anyone here is asking him to stay. I feel like this seemingly feels like he's putting this all on himself. What do you think? Yeah, I think that, I don't think that he's putting it all on himself. He's like, he looks

around and nothing else is going to get done. But maybe, to your point, maybe if he goes to live his life, that will be the impetus and the spark that gets his two brothers to step up. Like, they aren't really stepping up now because he's around. So when the need is there maybe they'll respond to that I don't want to put that out there though because you never know like he could leave and then they could just like I mean his fear is that he leaves and he goes and does his own thing and they do like they do jack shit and everything falls apart well I guess so but it's also like and I know that he had mentioned that his mother's sick but she is still taking care of everything around the house and you know seems to be quite self-sufficient

so what's the worst case scenario you go live your life and then they figure out their mess as well like it doesn't it doesn't seem like him being there changes much right his two brothers are still like his mom is you know i don't know like he doesn't really complain much about his mom and his sister is ready to go to college so like they're kind of all set in their ways right now so i don't understand what he brings to the table by being there other than his own suffering I think that, first of all, Charlie, I think you should see someone and talk through all of your issues because I think what's deeper in this to me is that Charlie doesn't want to abandon his family the way his dad did.

Like, the resentment is about that too. Like, the man, the father didn't stick around and he had to pick up the pieces. And so a lot of that resentment is still probably unworked through from when dad left. Yes, sure. So, Charlie, I definitely think that you need to, I mean, I know you're not Charlie, but you're Charlie to us and that comes with so much affection. Charlie, I definitely think that you need to address that and work through that part first.

Agreed. And also understand that should you make the decision to go and live your life and do the things that you want to do, then you're not your dad. Yeah, you've put in the work. You've done more than most parents have done by taking care of your mother and your siblings. I don't know. My heart breaks because there's nothing worse than seeing or hearing about someone who is so frustrated and that feels so handcuffed to a life that they don't feel like they

should be living. you know and i just don't feel like that need if he has that need if he has that desire i just don't think it's i don't a i don't think it's going to go anywhere but b i feel like it's only going to hurt him down the line if he doesn't actually go do the things that he wants to and he's earned it he's earned his freedom and i wonder if he would have that conversation with his mom yeah if she would be like go yeah go live your life you know no mom wants to see their son or no mom wants to see their child suffering and not living their best life you know so I feel like yes you're right go talk to the therapist work out those kind of issues also have

honest conversation with your mom um about yeah what what it would be like if he did start to like separate a little bit more get it like I don't know move out of the house or whatever etc etc I just feel like it's important for him to um yeah as I said live his life I wonder if he pays for the house i don't like the mom doesn't work right so he's definitely a breadwinner in a major way so listen it's not gonna be easy it's not gonna he's not gonna be like peace out with a fucking bag and that's it it's gonna be it's and it might not be an instant but he can start to slowly slowly slowly do these things that feels like freedom to him yeah and you're right even the even speaking to a therapist will maybe be its own source of freedom as well

but the first thing that you have to sort of absorb charlie is that you deserve to have the life that you want and whatever the steps are to get there like the first thing to do because you know your email is really about what should i do but i think the question that you're asking is do I deserve it? And you do. Yeah. So the next steps that you take should all be in service of that statement.

You deserve to go out and pursue the things that you want to pursue. Yes, I agree. Good luck, Charlie. Keep us posted. Let us know. Watch Party of Five if you've never watched it before.

And I'll watch it alongside you because I want to. And yeah, you are the Charlie character. That's how much affection we have for you. Okay, next. Dear Sasha and Lainey, Recently, a colleague of mine, let's call him Zed, we've started becoming more friendly over a discovered shared love of sports.

What started as some verbal trash talk about the playoffs via instant message has led to more personal chats. I would classify our discussions as intimate but not flirtatious. Nothing offside and nothing inappropriate, but we talk on and off all day about our childhoods, families, relationships, etc. It's certainly not work-related or topics I generally discuss with colleagues, but nothing to indicate any romantic intentions on either of our parts. I'm, okay, I'm just going to start summarizing because this is long.

They're both in their 30s. She's single. He's a common law relationship, eight years. They work in the same company, different office locations. He suggested lunch. they walked from the office to like his. Whoa, where do we go from here? He suggested we meet for lunch and walk from his office to mine about a half hour trek. Up until this point, we had never actually met in person and our correspondence had been via phone or IM. He had mentioned he was shy

as am I. So I was slightly worried it would be awkward in person and that our online connection wouldn't translate in real life. A totally bizarre thought as this wasn't a date. It was a lunch between colleagues. Turns out I had nothing to worry about. It was great. We didn't stop talking the entire time. Uh, we looked at the watches. Oh my God, so much time had passed. He covered the bill. They were there for two hours. Um, I would say he's not my type physically, not someone I would notice, but after spending time with him, he's got a certain appeal. Attraction is too strong a word, but there's some intrigue there. I find him interesting, genuinely enjoy his company. Once he got back to his office, he IM'd me and we continued talking until it was time

to leave. I should point out that we only talk at work and don't text or anything outside of the office or on weekends. I have a meeting at his office this coming week and he mentioned we should grab lunch again. I'm hesitant, not because I don't want to go out, but because if I was his wife, I don't think I'd appreciate my husband spending all this time talking and getting to know a single girl, innocent or not.

Sasha, would you be bothered if Corey talked all day with another woman? Lainey, would you be okay if Jacek spent a two-hour lunch with another woman, then proceeded to message her the instant he got back to his desk? I'm trying to respect the boundaries of his relationship, as I would hope others would for me if the tables were turned. As a single woman, I answer to no one and can basically do whatever I want with whomever I want, but try to be considerate to others. From his end, I don't sense anything other than friendliness,

as far as I can see. In my previous workplace, I had a similar situation where my work husband at the time and I spent a lot of time together. I asked him if his girlfriend minded, to which he said no. I felt almost foolish bringing it up, like I was creating an issue when the people who were actually in the relationship didn't care, so why should I? Lo and behold, even with their reassurances, he ended up developing feelings for me. They split up for a time, and he and I are no longer friends.

Even when I try to do the right thing, I seem to create issues, and I don't want to repeat the same pattern. What should I do? Keep my distance? Should I divorce my work spouse? should I nip this friendship in the bud before feelings develop either on my side, his side, or both? Should I discuss this with him or would it create an unnecessary awkward situation? Am I overthinking it? Although not my type, it's not impossible that attraction can eventually grow.

On a side note, he told me he and his wife were former colleagues and he was in a relationship when they met. So it's not totally out there that these types of things develop between people who spend a lot of time together. How am I potentially ending what could be a great friendship for no reason or is this a slippery slope down a dangerous path thanks in advance b oh my god b you're so fucking funny that you would write this whole thing and you're weaving your answer in and out each paragraph i mean the this is sketchy upon sketchy you're only writing to us because there's something there yes yes not my type but kind of i'm interested we're flirtatious um but but we're not flirtatious we're intimate which is like a thousand times worse um

no this is this is crossing the lines of appropriateness for sure um this is leading down a path that I don't think you want to and you've actually gone down this path before with another colleague like the writing's on the wall like bad things are about to happen if you continue to pursue this. Yeah. It just makes me laugh because she knows. She knows. You know. And also you wouldn't be writing to us if this was so innocent. At the very least, you are taking him home with you. You're thinking about him when you get home. You're thinking about him and taking the time to draft this very long email to us. So what that means is even if you don't know if he's developed feelings for you, you sure as shit are doing something, which

means that you shouldn't be doing it anymore because that person is, you have, as you said, you should respect his relationship. A hundred percent. And like, if there's any other sign, Gassic, who really doesn't ever care what we're talking about on this podcast, literally had to stop and wave his hands up in the air. Like, what the fuck? Because this is as blatant as blatant gets. So really, we can pretend like we could take the time to like fucking go over sentence

by sentence. Not necessary. But not necessary. Because you took the time to write. Yeah. You did the fucking hard work. Our quick answer here is like fucking back off. But again.

Back off and back away. Just in case this was not long enough or clear enough for you, because, you know, we know that you want your time here, but also you want us to really lay this down for you. Unpack it. is you is, and you want tough talk, tough talk. You've been through this before. So in that past situation, whatever you were putting out there was being received and that person developed feelings for you.

Yeah. And if you're behaving the same way and I'm sure you're charming and sexy and fun and flirty and you have the sports thing going on and you're just so awesome about the sports thing and… Easy to talk to, all that kind of stuff. Yeah. It's happening again too. So if you truly want to respect the person's relationship, which you say you do…

And truly don't want to get into the same situation as you did last time. Do not even have the conversation with him. No. That is only a door that opens. The way to keep the door closed is just no meetings for lunch. No. And maybe start slowly cutting back on the number of texts and let the person be happy in his common law relationship of eight years.

Okay? Yeah. We tied that one up. KB. Don't even keep us posted. Just do what we just told you to do. Yeah. Okay.

Last question. Hi, Sasha and Lainey. I just started a new job, a dream job. Love every aspect of it. However, there's this girl I work with that I can't stand. Long story short, she's out to get me. She's technically my boss. For my job, we work on teams of five and she oversees my team.

She's the type of personality that I do not mesh well with. I am relatively reserved, friendly, don't like to ruffle feathers. She, on the other hand, is outspoken, rough, and kind of gutless. She calls me out for not doing my job, will actually tell me how to do my job, even though my specific job requires a master's degree and is very specialized and will CC my actual boss on her emails to call me out on stuff. Every time I get an email or have to interact with her, which is often, it literally takes everything in me to put a smile on my face and pretend to be friendly when inside I am screaming and kind of just want to punch her in the face for being such

a you-know-what. I've been really nice to her to prove to her that I'm a good person and don't want to cause any tension. However, it's not working. I'm actually kind of nervous she will get me fired, even though I'm doing everything right and feel like I'm good at my job. How do I not let her get to me? I actually have so much anger toward her and don't know how to settle it. I'm so nervous lately that she will actually get me fired and don't know how to put that thought to rest. Thanks for taking the time to read this.

Please don't read my real name. Thank you, X. I have some questions. Okay, yeah, go for them. I saw your little face scrunch up. What are some of the questions? I just want to know, like, when you get an email from somebody who tells you you've done something wrong, but I just want to know if she did do something wrong.

Well, that's why, I mean, for me, when you were reading it, I was like, there seems to be, there could be the potential that our writer has some blind spots. Because when someone writes and doesn't take, like, an iota of blame, that always kind of raises a red flag to me. Because I'm like, hmm, like, did you do something wrong? Are you as perfect and, like, as professional as you say? Those are, like, my first instincts. Yeah.

I just wanted to unpack more. Like, I want more detail. She says she calls me out for not my – she calls me out for not doing my job, will actually tell me how to do my job, and will CC my actual boss on her emails to me calling me out on stuff. So I just want to know what you're being called out on. Like, let's say that you were supposed to do X and you did X, then… Everything should be above board?

Is that what you're saying? Right. Like, isn't there, like, an X that you could show? Well, that's what I'm saying. I feel like there could be a blind spot that she's not talking about right now, which is maybe she did make a mistake. Because nobody would be like, this person did it wrong, here's the proof, but then the proof is everything's right.

Well, no, I feel like… your boss. I feel like people out there can relate to this in the sense of, I'm sure like everybody has worked for a horrible boss who, and work things are so nuanced, right? So I just kind of want to know what the environment is, like what specifically, I guess, the wrong thing is. Okay. Because very few, I guess, I guess in some situations it's more nuanced what the qualification of not doing your job right is. But we'll never know that. No, we don't know that.

So I just, I want more, I don't feel like we have enough information here. But bottom line is definitely in a broader sense for everybody out there, what do you do when you feel like this one person is out to get you? And also it comes down to work styles. So the boss is abrasive, it sounds like, and this person is reserved. She calls herself reserved, friendly, and doesn't want to ruffle feathers. So it's opposite sides of the spectrum, right? To me, if this person is a sort of supervisor for you, then I want to know if there are

any attempts, like, to approach this person and be like, hey, I just want to know how you think we could improve the project. You know, listen, I have no context here, but to go in and have a very productive, like, work, almost a progress report slash performance review, but informal meeting. Well, sometimes you have to be your own moderator, right? And especially when someone is trying to kind of throw you under the bus at all times and kind of tattle on you. Like, I feel like phase one of this would be to have a conversation with her to be like, how do we get back on the same page, right? Yeah, because that's really important because so much gets lost in translation when there's emails or phone calls. You know, people are, there's so many factors into being misunderstood in a work environment. And the other thing for me is nothing good comes out of the breeding of paranoia.

And weaved in this email is a lot of paranoia about being fired. And it could be warranted, but I think that needs to be taken off the table. Yeah. Because if you start to do that, then you start to be weird. Like, I've been in that situation before at work where I feel like, oh, God, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. They hate me. They're going to fire me.

I'm doing everything wrong, even though everything is fucking kosher. And so I feel like she needs to, again, take that out of the equation. Yeah. So that she's, like, fully functioning in a normal mental space. Yeah. I completely agree. I think that a lot of this boils down to communication always. When you get one of those emails from her that CCs your boss, is there a possibility

for you to have an in-person conversation saying, hey, I just got your email. I see here that you are unhappy with this, that, and the other. Here's what I try to do. Is there a way or what is your suggestion for next time? Yeah. it's as simple as that. Everybody needs direction. And if you are going to be dinged for asking for direction, that is actually a sign of poor leadership. A hundred percent. And so then what do you do when… So if our reader does those two kind of

phases and then you realize that you're stuck with a shitty fucking manager, a shitty fucking boss. Yeah. Well, if that's the case, there's another boss, right? Like this person is the pseudo boss or whatever, the next step down or next step up on the way to the boss. But then you have like the, if you have to call it this ammunition to be like, hey, on this day I went to see her, I asked her for guidance and direction on how to improve it. This is what she told me to do and I've done it. So I've demonstrated as an employee my willingness to improve and my willingness to seek out ways to improve.

I have not gotten the mentorship that I need here. But you have to sort of start collecting that dirt on her. Yeah. And I also think, yeah, I think people are so used to having this back and forth over email. Like, and it's just becoming harder and harder to gauge what people are actually feeling, that it's so important that when you get something like that, you don't fucking stew at your desk or whatever, stew at your desk, but then go and have the conversations that you know exactly what you're working with, that exactly as you just said, getting some

fucking intel so that if you do ever have to take it to the next step up, you already can have all that proof ready and waiting. And then also, you know, when you get those emails and you have said you're a reserved person, but when you get those emails and your real boss is CC, there's no reason for you not to reply all and be like, hey, Jane, here are the things I've done. Listen, we have no context for this, so let's say, here are the steps I've taken to deliver this project, and on this date and this date, I did this, I'm attaching the workflow of it, whatever. You're really doing a good job of pretending about this job. But so happy, like, but happy to take suggestions on how to make this better.

Yes, yes. Then you have it in writing. Then your real boss is going to be like, I've seen the work that X has put in, looks good to me or whatever. Then I am also seeing that X is asking for direction, meaning that X is always open to new ideas. Then you have that fucking documented and you're doing it in a way where it's so nicey nice, right?

Hi, Jane. Thanks for that. Here's my blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, and that's it too, right? Like in a workplace, it's so hard to also not get your feelings hurt and also like become hurt and then act out towards that. Like the thing that I've learned for sure, you know, having a job for a really long time is sometimes you have to create barriers around your fucking heart.

Your work heart needs to be protected and you just have to sometimes pretend that it doesn't exist or at least put on a fucking happy face or a happy email. Like you just have to confront that in like some sort of fakeness to get you through the goddamn day, especially if you're dealing with somebody who is a bad leader. Yeah. So hopefully, hopefully opening up that communication and at the very least not taking it home to Stu, but coming back with a healthier response. Like, if they give you, if she's giving you an unhealthy response, it doesn't mean that

your reaction to it has to be unhealthy. You can respond in a really productive way by saying, thanks, here's what I've done, how can I make it better? That is, if anybody wants to ding you for that, and if everybody, anybody's going to take you to task for that, lawsuit. Of course, of course, yeah. Oh, agreed. Everything you said.

And on that note, to go back to the beginning, please tell us your pussy stories because we're super, the two of us are really curious. I know. I wanted to say send pictures, but obviously I can't say. Are you going to go look at your pussy tonight? No, I'm going to give it a second. Really? Because I kind of want to do this thing, like when you get home, let's look at our pussies

together. Oh my God, BFFs for life. Maybe. I mean, now I'm curious. Now I'm curious. Now I really want to put it to the test. I want to understand if I could, yeah, pick it out of a fucking pussy. You know, actually one thing, one thing about pussies that I forgot to mention earlier is that what I, from my, like from what I do remember about my pussy, like not all the parts are the same shade of skin color. Okay.

Like sometimes your flap is like darker than like the other area. So that's how you would be able to map it out? Is that what you're saying? No, I mean, I think that that's why some people consider it unattractive. Oh, like discoloration. Like, think about your face skin, right? Like, if there are patches on your face skin, sometimes, like, is your face tone even? No, but I guess this goes back to how, what, what condition your pussy is kept in, right? So, a lot of the time, I would imagine.

Condition? I'm sorry, my. Not in a condition. I take care of my pussy. Exactly. This is what I'm saying. Just let me fucking finish. Either one is Brazilian or one is not, right?

Like, so how would you be able, I feel like actually I could, why are you looking at me like that? What does it matter what your fucking like hair situation is down there? Because then you wouldn't be able to see this discoloration that you're talking about, these patches. No, I'm talking about the fucking flaps. There's no hair on the flaps. Oh, you're talking about literally peeling back?

No, the flaps are one color, but the flaps would have hair on them for some people. There's no hair that grows on my flaps. I have no idea what you're talking about. I know. Rewind. Rewind. What are you – I'm going to like – I'm talking about the fucking flaps.

Like, there's no hair that grows on my flaps. I please I I'm actually like busting a sweat because I don't understand what you mean pull up a pussy photo okay I'm going okay stand by people I actually just googled pussy flap this is a work phone oh so right that's what you mean you're talking spread out I was talking about like a closed one what do you mean spread out i'm talking about here like we should pause this for a second can i draw it on that draw it on that no give me the fucking pass me the fucking picture

i'm talking about the these folds do you see how here is a little darker yes yes yes yes And then the pinkness of cake. Yeah. So this whole time, I thought that we weren't talking about spread. I thought we were just talking about the actual… No hair grows on that part. Yeah. I get that.

I was talking… I thought when you were saying beef curtains, they were the stuff, the stuff, the part where there's hair on them. Those aren't beef curtains. The beef curtains are inside? Yeah, Sash. Oh, I didn't know that. Like, can I just properly point out to you what a, like, where the beef curtain is?

Oh, God. Now I'm looking at so many sick things. Like, Jesus. This is a, this is the beef curtain. Oh. Oh, I didn't know it was the inside. I thought we were talking about the outside. What?

Where the hair is. No. It's like the actual lips. Those sick? Well, look at this one. That's eggs. Okay. Okay.

Can't you feel it? Like, don't you ever touch it? You can pinch this. When you think something is pinchable, this area, you can pinch your own flap. If you can pinch your own fucking lip, then, of course, there's going to be some hang. This is so confusing to me. Sash, you need… Listen.

It's confusing to me, too. for that you're confused about that this is something that you know that is that something that lives in you you don't it lives in you too I think we're gonna have to be to be continued because after this podcast I'm gonna need to look at all these images with you okay I look at that I I just don't understand like you don't Do you not know what a vulva looks like? Of course I do. Clearly not.

What I was thinking we were talking about is, stand by, this part. I thought that was what was getting rejuvenated. No. The fucking lips are getting rejuvenated. Got it. Okay. Got it, folks. Thanks, Jada Pinkett Smith.

All right. Okay. Tell us all your thoughts about your pussy. Yeah. We'll be back next week. Thanks for listening. Check us out on Google Play, iTunes, Spotify, leave comments. And keep your questions coming to me at Sasha at LadyFawcett.com.

Bye. Bye. We'll be right back. Thank you.