What's Your Drama - Sasha Answers: Break-ups to the Third - The Bottle, Lingering Love, and the Break Itself

Episode Date: June 28, 2016

Thanks for joining us again for the Sasha Answers podcast! We feel so lucky that you listen each week and thank those of you who have written in with your questions, your feedback, and your personal stories. It's cool to see that a lot of the questions through the podcasts have resonated with you and have made you feel a little less alone.With that said, it's time to take a listen to this week's new show! It's all about breakups: Breaking up with the bottle, breaking up with a guy who's got a lingering love and breaking up with a break.Keep your questions coming to me at [e-mail] and please check us out on iTunes and leave us a rating/comment. We love hearing from you and are still gunning for that coveted #17 position!Sasha xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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You're buying influence. Learn more by visiting acast.com slash advertise. Hi, this is Lainey. Welcome to the Lainey Gossip Podcast for Sasha Answers. Hi. Hi. How's it going? Pitter patter.

That is my dog jumping off the couch. Yes. It's very cute. How has your week been? It's been good. Yeah? Yeah. It's like hot as fuck.

It is hot. I'm getting- Not that I'm complaining, but it's actually a sauna. One of my happy things, I have three happy things to tell you. Okay. Well, that happened this week where one, my mom was in town, which we know, and that filled me with much joy. And underwear.

And lots of underwear. A cornucopia of underwear. Two, I'm getting fucking air conditioning in my house. I'm excited for you. This is like a really big deal as like a 30, however old I am. You've entered the 1970s. I totally, totally. And then three, I wanted to say that I feel like I have made a movement happen, even though

I haven't, is that tampons are fucking free in New York City, in schools and in jails and in shelters. And I had nothing to do with it, but I'm going to pretend like I did. and no one signed my petition that I made, but someone had a petition and someone made moves and bless the city of New York City. I love that you named three places that you will never be, a school, a jail, and a shelter in New York City.

Still, it just feels like a win. This doesn't change the fact that you are tampon poor. I want to know how this happens. And I got my period today and I didn't have a tampon, But the lucky tampon machine, I pulled on it and then one just came down. Remember I told you that that sometimes happens? Anyway, so it's like a fucking another full circle moment for me. But I just want to know, because I always have tampons in like a pouch that I keep in

my bag. I know, I don't do that. So I don't know what else you want to say. We don't need to relive the last conversation. Anyway, this is just one of the mysteries about you that I love so much. Yes. And also you're getting your dogs bathed and yes, I'm very happy we're doing it. laparoscopically. Laparoscopically. I don't know how to say it. Laparoscop. Yeah. Laparoscopically.

Yes. Where they don't rip her little genitals apart. They take it out and I don't know, beads. And then she doesn't have to wear a cone. Yeah. And I feel very happy about that decision. That makes me happy that I don't. How's your husband dealing with that? He's fine. Okay. I mean, if it was a boy dog, would he be different? No. But what I found that's been very interesting is every time I see a, not every time, but a lot of the male dogs that are kicking around the dog parks aren't neutered. Okay. And whenever I ask them about it, the dude, it's always usually the girl.

She's like, oh, my boyfriend won't let me get our dog neutered because they think it'll take the manliness away from the dog. Is that a thing? Jacek's like that? No, he doesn't, he doesn't think, care about the manliness of the dog. Oh, okay. it's just and he i mean we've had two dogs both of them have been neutered elvis is not old enough to get neutered yet we like to wait a year he just doesn't like to think about the process

because you literally remove the testes and like every time i say that remove the testicles he shivers and yeah but he just because he transfers it to himself he imagines it happening to him Which I mean, it's fair enough. I'm still a bit conflicted that this is even a thing. Like, why can't I let my little dog just have her, period? I mean, I'm pro-tampon. I should let her have, pro-period. I think it's more, but I think it's not that. It's obviously animal control. I know, but some, like, fucking dog. Like, your dog rapes my dog whenever I bring her over. I wouldn't, that's a strong word. And I would not. Assaults my dog.

Um, I would say that he, um, is affectionate towards her. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, anyway, um, should we start? Yes. Hi, Sasha and Lainey. I'm writing to you because I think that drinking has become something that is too negative for me to have in my life anymore, but I don't know if how I could possibly cut it out completely without totally changing my entire life. I'm a 25 year old girl and have honestly never been a good drunk. Since I started drinking around 16, I would always cry or do

something embarrassing. The first time I had sex, I was blackout drunk in a bathroom in high school and I feel like this kind of pattern has just continued. I only drink on the weekends usually, but can't seem to do it without getting out of hand once in a while. I have and continue to act in ways that I feel are not representative of who I am. Saying nasty things about friends or getting into psycho fights where I completely overreact, almost getting physical, or just cry about nothing. I have slept with guys who are supposed to be off limits, just been a general awful person to people who have been nothing but great to me.

I have slept with a lot of people I wouldn't have sober, sometimes I don't even remember it, and wake up completely confused about where I am and what happened. I feel disgusted with myself about this when I actually take the time to think about it, so I don't really. I have done so many reckless and stupid things I've been sexually assaulted Which I don't think would have happened if I hadn't been drunk Whenever there is a major negative consequence of drinking

I will tell myself to slow down I'll do okay at it for a while Even six months at a time But then I always screw up again And do something awful eventually I'm trying to take responsibility for my actions now And realize that the things I do drunk are still me And this is not the person I want to be

Despite my many mistakes, I have a group of amazing, amazing friends who have always been there for me and the best family a girl could ask for who loves me so much. I know that they would say that I'm a kind, thoughtful, and fun person and a good friend when I'm sober. My main concern is that while these amazing friends would absolutely support me if I were to make the decision to cut out drinking entirely, that is legitimately all we do. And for them, it isn't an issue. All our weekend socializing takes place at bars.

We go to music festivals to party. We travel and party. We go out for casual drinks on the patio. I'm very outgoing and this is why I enjoy drinking, partying so much because it allows me to meet tons of new people all the time. I'm confident and comfortable doing all these things sober, but I feel like it won't be the same. I fear I will miss out on having a social life.

I've been told by many people so many times when I express a desire to stop drinking to just have a couple or set a limit and stick to it. Do you think this is actually possible? I would love to be able to do that, but any time I have tried in the past, I just go back to my old ways once I get comfortable. Have I just not been committed enough to my limits? Will I never be able to have a glass of wine or beer at dinner again? If I just stop altogether, how do I explain this to people?

How do I continue to go out and have fun without seeming like a freak and go on dates? Thank you for any advice you can offer. This is a surprisingly scary process to think about committing to for real. Oh, she didn't leave a name. So maybe let's just give her one. I'm going to call her Julie. Okay. Well, Julie is awfully brave and strong and awesome to not only share this super personal stuff with us, but that she is facing, you know, her own demons head on, which sounds like she, while in a tough place, is in the right place to make a change. And I did just want to highlight some things, which is a lot of her behavior is trademark of someone who has an alcohol problem.

So I don't want to make her feel bad, but I do want to just really hammer home the point that she does have an alcohol problem. And there's kind of five telltale signs, which is you want to quit, but you can't. Your tolerance increases over the years because you're intaking so much more alcohol over time. You get yourself in dangerous and risky situations that you wouldn't find yourself in if you weren't drunk. You have a complete change in your personality. And the last one is that you frequently blackout. And literally every one of those, she hits the mark on. And so I think that's just important highlight to know that this isn't something that you can just hope goes away. And the other thing is when she's expressing that she is, um, like afraid of the

change, this is the time to make the change. You don't want to be this person anymore. You want to be the person, um, that is good, that isn't getting yourself into dangerous situations, that is a reliable friend, that is a reliable sister, daughter. Um, and so I'm just really excited, even though I know this is going to be a hard road for you, I'm excited that you are ready to make a change in your life. I, you know, I agree with you. I think that Julie is incredibly brave and self-aware. I think it's a big step to acknowledge all these things about yourself that you do when you are drinking and that you don't like. I think that is probably one of the most important steps is that self-awareness. Before I continue though,

I just want to put it out there. There's something Julie wrote that I want to just, not correct, but put out there and then we can move on. And Julie said that there were times that she was probably sexually assaulted and it wouldn't have happened if she wasn't drunk. And I don't love that logic because the onus, Julie, wasn't on you. And whether or not you were drunk should not have led to you being sexually assaulted. That person who sexually assaulted you should not have touched someone who was not capable of giving consent. And we have to stop using language like that. I read a really amazing tweet that someone showed me a few weeks ago and it was from a man and I

really wish I could find it again. But the man was like, in this tweet, this was his tweet. He was like, you know what's really, really easy? The easiest thing in the world for me as a man is to not rape. It's never been hard. It's never been hard for me to not rape. And then he went on, he was like, you know what? I don't walk down the street and say to myself, oh fuck, I wish I could rape somebody. No. Have to say me, Bill. Let's call him Bill. Bill has never been so confident in anything as my ability to not rape. Yeah. Anyway, so what I'm saying is, is that when Julie has been sexually assaulted, Julie, you were drunk. So what? That is not, you know. Doesn't fall on her own as far. Yes. Exactly. So anyway, we got that out of the way. Julie,

I think that, again, it's very brave of you to acknowledge that you have a problem. I am not an addiction counselor. Neither are you, Sash. Nope. So I don't want to be an expert in that regard. What I do want to say is I think that you should start seeing somebody. I think that you first should start seeing your doctor, your family doctor, and let your family doctor know that you think that you may have a problem with alcohol and that family doctor can refer you to a specialist who can help you with this. And that person will have the skills to teach you how to manage this issue and answer all those questions about how will I be able to stop drinking when all my friends are out there drinking? How will I be able to stay sober? How will I still be able to maintain

a social life. All these things are very valid concerns. You're 25 years old. You're having a great time. You have great friends. You want to be out there meeting new people. I get it. I get the anxiety around that. But I also know that there are definitely ways around it. As it happens, I just watched a really good documentary this weekend. It's about, it's called As I Am, DJ AM. Adam Goldstein. And so he was an addict very young and then he got clean for quite a while, like I think nine or 10 years. And while he was clean, he was DJing in the club scene, the LA club scene, the Vegas club scene. I mean, imagine he was surrounded by all of it and maintained a lengthy sobriety and was successful at maintaining a lengthy sobriety. And that was

actually when his career took off. So he got sober, then his career took off. He became the first million dollar DJ in the world. People acknowledge his genius. DJ Jazzy Jeff was in this documentary saying that he was awesome and he did all these great things. And unfortunately, yes, we know that he died of an overdose. It happened after that plane crash that he was in and pain management from, he suffered very serious burns, there was pain management, you know, there were, there was depression, there was post-traumatic stress disorder that he was dealing with. And of course, as we know now, he wasn't able to cope after that. But what I learned in that time was that he was very committed in those nine, 10 years during his sobriety when he was at raves and at,

you know, the temptation was all around. Awesome parties. And he was able to do that. So it's possible. And the experts... It's more than possible. Oh, yeah. Because I think more and more you're seeing even this culture of Hollywood. 100%. So many people are coming out with the fact that they do have addiction problems. And yeah, it's hard to be... And that's what I want to say to our readers. It's not going to be easy. But yes, as you said, like you go see a counselor, you see an addiction specialist and they will give you those tools to cope because absolutely you can do this. Absolutely. As long as you're committed to it, you can, you can, you can make a difference in your life because you're clearly not happy with what has transpired in the last

couple of years. And I look forward to the person that you want to be. The therapy will also help you perhaps look into some of the root causes of you feeling that you have to drink to have a good time and you will be learning more about yourself, uncovering more about yourself, Julie. And I think that this is a big step for you to acknowledge this, look yourself in the mirror, tell yourself what you don't like about you and want to make a change. So I hope that this is not insulting by us saying we're excited for you. Let us know if you need any more resources. We don't know where you are. So if you can send us a note if you want, but see your doctor, get a referral and start being more honest about it with yourself and even the people around you if you're able to do that at

this time. But again, a therapist can definitely help you with that. Yeah. Good luck. Good luck. Do you keep hearing podcast ads like this one, for example, but always wonder how you actually get involved with them for your own brand or organization well it's easier than you think we're acast and we give you the platform to do it all yourself browse thousands of popular podcasts choose the shows that match your perfect audience set your budget and launch and if you want a hand our podcast specialists are there to help you launch with confidence this is podcast advertising without barriers get started at acast.com slash advertise okay next uh i have a very long track record of being relationships for too long with the wrong

guy my friends have labeled me as the douchey dater when i met a we hit it off right away i tried to find a guy for me that was the opposite of my exes and a was i fell for him hard and fast my friends and family agreed he was a good guy for me i had to have surgery on my lady bits relatively early on in our relationship and he was so caring and understanding during the seven weeks of no sex, which only made me fall for him more. I was used to douchey guys, remember. But about four months in, I found out he was sort of in a relationship when we first started dating. He says the relationship was over when he met me, but the other girl was still living with him, very much still in love with him and trying to make it work. He asked her to move out shortly

after meeting me and says there was never anything physical between them once we met. I felt stupid. I should have noticed something like that. I was hurt. If I had found out early on, I would have walked away. A assured me that she is out of the picture like that, so I stayed, but they are still friends. The other girl does know about A and I.

He told me she found a note he kept that I had wrote to him and had some proof to go with what he was saying. Since then, A has been very honest with me about things related to the other girl. A couple of weeks ago, A started becoming a little distant. He was having a really rough couple of weeks of work, and he was working a lot of nights when I worked days, making it hard to see each other. I didn't think too much about it, but this morning, I found a note in his nightstand table when I was putting something away.

The other girl had come to his place around the time he became distant, which he had told me about, to get something left behind from the move. The note was two pages from her explaining how much she loves him and how thankful she is for all he did during their relationship. She ended the note with explaining in detail what she loves about him and that she hopes that they still end up together. This was something she gave to him when she saw him last. I know it wasn't there before.

I did not mean to find this note, but now I don't know what to do. I was simply putting something away in his nightstand like I typically do. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I don't know how to bring this up without sounding like I was snooping like a crazy bitch. Why did he keep this note, and why did he keep it where I could easily find it? I'm also scared of what his answer will be because I'm starting to fall in love with this man.

I know I'm not a fling because it's been more than six months, but what if he is having second guesses? Am I falling back into the cycle of dating douches? Do I have blinders on like I've had in previous relationships and not seeing him for the douche that he could be? Please help slap some sense into me, douchey dater. Oh. Oh, douchey dater.

You were just putting away something. I don't want to call you douchey, but if you insist. No. No. I don't want to call you douchey. Let's call you a D. Let's call you Snoopy. Let's call you Snoopy.

Yeah. Not that that's a bad thing. We've all done it. Yeah. But I just like how she's like, man, I just by accident put something away and pulled out two full length pages. Fine. Yeah. The letter. I mean, I'm kind of, I kind of have to sometimes work off instinct off of

these things. And for me, I'm not getting a feeling that her boyfriend's a douche. I'm getting more of a feeling that the ex-girlfriend is a bit of a douche. You know, she's trying to woo him back maybe. But I feel like from everything that you've told us, Snoopy, is that he's been really honest with you. You know, he told you that she came by. He's kind of been really like quite an open book. So I feel like you should continue that theme with the relationship and be honest. Tell him that you saw this fucking letter, you fucking were putting something away and you fucking pulled out two pages and read it. And see what he has to say because if you leave this in your own head, you're going to start to feel really insecure. You're going to

start acting differently, which is going to make him feel weird. Like it's just going to turn something that could be honest into like this weave of weird bullshit lying. You know what I mean? I think that the thing is even before Snoopy found the two-page letter by accident, she was already having issues with how they started and the fact that A was with this other girl and was living with this other girl and didn't know about it. And even though A has been upfront with her,

that's a lingering problem for her. Of course. Because the last thing she wants to do is date another fucking douche. That's right. So and then that compounded with the fact that she's found this two-page letter and this girl isn't willing to give up on him

which I mean I wish we could talk to her because there is wanting to be with somebody and then there's wanting to be with somebody who has left you for somebody else. Like that is, that really concerns me Because, you know, when someone has said to you, I don't want you, I'm pursuing something with somebody else, why do you keep- Well, you know what that is.

That triggers people wanting the other person so badly again. It's just so, yeah, like it's- I've been in situations where a guy's broken up with me and then I'm like, hmm, maybe I should have gone back with that person. But I did, I've done that, but then I've manipulated the guy into getting back with me immediately. Yes, that's what this chick's doing. But it hasn't been immediate.

He's still with Snoopy. Yes. Unless you think that he's – No, but I do think that – I know what you're saying. Yes, you've tried to get that person back and you do right away. But sometimes – Sure. When they've moved on and you're like, uh, what?

You want them back again even more. I think that Snoopy has all this anxiety related to how they started. Yes. And then has found this letter. So my advice is I, and this is, it's pretty, I know it's pretty, um, I have like, if it were me, I have a plan and my plan and my advice to Snoopy is I think that you should disclose what you found. And I think that that should be the opening to a conversation that leads to you two taking

a break. Oh, a break. Oh, this is interesting. Yeah. Thickens. Okay. Because I think that, you know, there has to be some resolution in terms of she's clearly not comfortable with the fact that he went from one person straight to her.

And at the root of this is questioning whether or not he has lingering feelings for the ex. She's pinpointed that he's been a little bit distant. But that's due to work. Like, okay, but go on, keep on going, sorry. Yeah. And so in order for you, at the heart of this, he's been a little bit distant. It's leading to her feeling, bottom line, the word is insecure. I feel like in order for her to feel more secure about things, you need to take a step back and let him show you that he's serious about you. Hi, I'm insecure. This is how we started. You had a relationship that was overlapping with me.

you didn't tell me about it. I've since found out. Now I find this letter. I'm not really sure if, you know, you're ready to move on with me. If you are, then during this break, you know, we can take some time, take a breather. If you still want me, then I know for sure I'm your girl. Okay. I don't believe in breaks because they don't really work. Okay. And I also think that before, even if you do take Lainey's advice and take a break, even though breaks don't work, that give the dude a chance to explain, right? Who's to say that if she's insecure, then that's stuff that Snoopy can work on.

I don't think he needs to do any more work. He's been honest and upfront about, you know, that this girl that- Has he? Because he hasn't been honest and upfront about her leaving him this letter. But everything, maybe he didn't want to like hurt her feelings.

Like he told her that she came over. Was he supposed to be like, Angie left me this. Like some things you don't have to share because he probably already knows she's insecure about this chick anyways. Right. I would just give him the opportunity, yes, to prove again, once again, that he is being honest with you and have that discussion and see where that goes. If his answer, if you don't like his answer, if you don't like what he has to say about that letter, then for sure, peace out. I wouldn't take a break. I'd fucking just break up with him. but I really do think

at this point it's a bit too early to give a to take a break like at this point just find out what the fuck he has to say about it

I think to me I think the break would help her sort out she loves him the break's gonna I don't know she says that

she's falling in love with him yes I think you I think that Snoopy needs to just take a step back and reassess

and see if he comes back and see what he shows and at least barf out all of her insecure feelings and her Snoopy letter feelings and then take a step back and be like, listen, I'm just not in a great headspace. Like, this clearly is weighing on her. It sucks. Like, to me, this is not happiness if she's still thinking about how they got together

and this other girl and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So that's my, that's what I would do. Sasha doesn't advocate for a break because she doesn't think breaks work, but we both do agree that you should at least tell him about this letter. But yeah, obviously I'm on the break side and a break doesn't have to be a year, but you know, taking a couple of weeks away from each other or even a month just to sort of sort things out and take a look at things from some distance is not a bad thing to me. Okay. I just, I think Snoopy could do the work if they had that conversation and he's honest with her and she feels like he's telling her the truth, then

she can still continue to do the work on her insecurity whilst in the relationship. That's my take on it. I mean, the third option is a line in the sand and be like, you can't talk to her anymore. Well, I would think that that would be, I would hope that would be his giving of truth, which would also come with the fact that, hey, you know what? If she makes you feel uncomfortable, then I'll fade her out of my life a bit. Yeah. I would hope he would come with that. Yes. Okay. Last letter. Hi, Sasha. I'm 24 years old and I've been with the same guy. Let's call him S since I was 18. It's really hard for me to say letters. So S, I'm just going to call him Scott. I hate the name Scott. Do we know if we hate Scott yet? Maybe we might hate him then.

Okay. I'll call him Sam. Sam. Great. I'm 24 years old and I've been with the same guy. Let's call him Sam since I was 18 he was my first everything when I was 21 we got engaged wow okay 18 then 21 engaged we still aren't married and for the last year our relationship has gone to shit utter complete shit maybe we should call him Scott okay we recently decided to take a break for a few months oh here we go about the breaks just to figure out if being together is really meant to be we both agreed we would see other people during this break Scott asked for the break and that we would try not to have sex with other people during our break but anything else is okay what does that mean anything above the waist is okay look i okay let's get to this i don't know

how i'm supposed to act towards him like can we still text or should we just cut it off completely until the break is over i'm confused about the etiquette of a break another thing is i recently joined bumble to meet other people good for you i feel very outdated with the dating world as some of them want to meet me after a day of texting. Is that normal? Yes. I feel like a grandma entering the dating world and I'm figuring out that I'm very insecure about myself. All the guys I've interacted with are almost an hour away, which might be a problem, but there's one guy on Bumble that I'm very attracted to and we've been texting continuously. I don't want to make him feel like I'm leading him on as I'm not over Scott or the break. Is that wrong? Do I tell him I'm on a break?

I'm even more confused on the etiquette of a post-break. Thank you. Any help would be appreciated. 24-year-old grandma. Okay, Scott, he is totally a Scott because, yeah. So this goes back to the break. Well, this is a stupid break. Like, to me, no offense, 25 grandma, but like a break where you can see other people.

I never said that the previous person should take a break and see other people and do everything but sex. Like, what is this? But that's what so many people do with breaks is like, they're not being celibate on their breaks. They're like, I need to like, this is an emotional timeout. It isn't like, oh, like to me, this is, first of all, the, this, this Scott, who's like, let's take a break, but I, I'm not going to fuck anyone, but I'll stick my finger in her pussy and not get my dick sucked.

Yeah. And she can suck my dick and like, whatever. That's like, I've got some titty action in my face and I like, that's okay. like anyway um grandma yeah who's 24 years old who was going to be was engaged to who's engaged and has only and has been with him since she was 18 been with him 18 since 18 21 engaged now 24 still not married girl i am telling you for me if this guy is saying to you i need a break and the conditions of the break are no dick penetration, but finger penetration and, you know, tongue penetration and all that.

This is not a life. This is not for you. No, not a break. It should be a break up. Yes. A hundred thousand bajillion percent. Yes. Leave this guy.

Kick him to the fucking curb. Told you. Like, leave Scott, the fucking name I hate. And then fucking get on Bumble and find this fucking hot dude and go on a date with him. So to answer your question, is it normal after one day of texting that people on Bumble want to meet you? Yes.

That's what they want to do. They want to stick their fingers in you, have their dick sucked. And that is fine. Like that is the point. You have been in a long-term relationship slash engagement since you're 18. So we're going on six years now. I don't want you to get into another serious relationship. I want you to sample what is out there.

I want you to have fun. Have fun. i want you to feel lots of fingers i want you to put your mouth on around a lot of dicks safely with consent obviously and i want you to go out there and live and not worry about scott i promise you he's doing the same thing and he gets to think that you're at home waiting for him which is what fuck him yes fuck scott i told you fucking not why i hate like the name scott hate it so fucking much I think of Scott

what's the Peterson no the one who killed his wife maybe that one no I wasn't thinking that extreme I was thinking

Scott the model who's an actor who's oh Scott Eastwood Scott Eastwood that too that too and I'm also thinking

of the Scott Kardashian Scott all Scott's bad Scott Disick oh yes it's one of those names right we've just made names

it's like a white guy with like blue eyes no and and like um and he like goes around calling people brother bro hey hey brother okay so we don't anyway so sorry um we don't mean to shit on your fiance but we kind of do mean to shit on your fiance i'm sorry because

um i like i i hate this idea of the break for you and i hate that it was his idea to take the break and he could go around as a break like he really needed the time to think about it emotionally meanwhile he could walk around motorboating people fuck him yeah i think that yes i say fuck him. And so you go get motorboated. I'm mad. I'm mad now. I love how mad you are. You just want her tits to be like fucking jumbled with. I think for sure this break, yeah, I think you need to reset the boundaries of the break and breakup. And so there's that. And I think that's really important. What I can't stand when people do with breakups is they think they can still have the same conversations and texts and have like these like emotional goodbyes over and

over again. No. If you're going to break up with someone and you fucking have to do it right, which means you cut them out of your goddamn life. Like as hard as it is, you just fucking don't answer the phone. You don't answer texts. You don't engage. That is the only way that you can like rip the bandaid off and continue on. 24 year old grandma. My God, 24. You're in your prime, dude. You don't even, you are in a glorious time right now. And we don't want you to be handcuffed to a break and not knowing boundaries with scott so we will just make you linger and linger until you're fucking 32 and you're still with this fucking loser and he still wants a fucking break he doesn't want to get married yeah anyway so release yourself

we want to release you from these break handcuffs yes um as you bumble and tinder and raya if you can get on Raya and whatever is out there because like I'm so excited for you and you're attracted to this guy. The fact that you are attracted to this guy is a good sign. It means that you are curious about what's out there. So do yourself a favor, like unburden yourself from all the things that you're tied down to that are preventing you from pursuing this attraction to this guy on bumble and go out and have some fun. But also have some fun, but also really reflect on the reality of this, this relationship with Scott and, and really be truthful and really be honest about if it was actually a really good relationship. Why did, why did you guys need that break? Like

really do a deep dive into any red flags that you saw. Do you know what I mean? Like make sure that the next person that you're with doesn't have the same characteristics as he does. Yeah, that's a deep dive within yourself. You don't need to deep dive with Scott at this point. Yeah, deep dive with yourself and then deep dive into someone else's dick. I'm on to, deep dive onto someone else's dick. I just want to say one more thing. I think that you, I'm just a bit worried that when you have your final break talk with Dickface Scott,

that he is going to still want to keep you in this state of perpetual, I don't know, breaks and boundaries. please be strong yes please be strong and do not let him talk you back into it and

it's it's done agreed it's done thank you for listening um keep your questions coming to

Sasha at LaineyGossip.com keep listening to us on iTunes leaving comments and reviews we really appreciate it and uh

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