What's Your Drama - Sasha Answers: The Time I Asked Out Ryan Reynolds

Episode Date: February 7, 2017

Welcome back! Thanks for joining us again this week.If the title of this podcast doesn't get ya, I give up. Because today, I tell you one of the biggest shafts of my single life. Enjoy. But that's not all - as usual, Lainey and I get down and dirty with your problems! On today's show: how to de-clepto your coat from a friend, how to embrace getting dissed, and whether or not constant boyfriend check-ins are cool.Thanks for listening and keep your questions coming to me at [e-mail] and check us out on iTunes and Google Play!.Also guys, I'm on Instagram now, don't worry no selfies but take a peep at @lostandfoundapothecary. However if you *are* looking for glamour selfies then hit up @laineygossip.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi, this is Lainey, and welcome to the Lainey Glass Podcast with Sasha Answers. Hi, Sasha. Hi, how are you? I'm good. It's Sunday, Super Bowl Sunday. Yes. Which means it's, what, like less than 12 hours. When we're recording, I know this is going to be posted on Tuesday, but we are recording

just about, I don't know, 12 or so hours after the Saturday Night Live hosted by Kristen Stewart. Yeah, fuck the Super Bowl. Can we talk about Kristen Stewart? I thought she was good. Because you have always had major lady bones for her, right? I have always supported her. Like, I felt like I quite like her acting.

I, yes, definitely criticized her for her, like, weird, awkward, fucking whatever mannerisms. But I did say two or three weeks ago that I was excited about her hosting because the Kristen Stewart we've met over the last two years has been, you know, she discovered her, how do I say this? I mean, she is opening up more now that she's dating women. She, I feel like as she said, I don't want to hide my private life because I'm gay and hiding it contributes to the fact that some people think that being gay is something should, being gay is something that should be hidden.

So she's kind of opened up and that monologue was… Well, that's… Right? Well, the monologue was the most interesting part where she, you know, was able to read Trump's tweets and just blatantly put out there that she cheated on Robert Pattinson, which I thought was great. Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. Like, she's like, hey, this was whatever five years ago. Yeah. It's over. It was a mistake. Let's joke about it now. And then she did mention too, right? She was like, we broke up and then we got back together.

We didn't ever really know that they… Did we know that they got back together? We did. We saw them. Okay. Like, that happened. But that was an admission as well, which I thought was interesting. But it was almost like water off my back, man.

My past. Not going to apologize for it. This is what happened. Hey, and by the way, now, Donald Trump, I'm so gay. Yeah. No, it was good. I actually enjoyed her because I typically, I really hate her. Like, I'm so uncomfortable.

I'm so nervous because I just don't find that people who are nervous and uncomfortable have to express it when they're uncomfortable and nervous. Right. I call bullshit on that. Especially since you're an actor. Yeah. So, like, figure your shit out. The camera's on.

Play the persona when you're not uncomfortable. Yeah. Which I found interesting because I think maybe that was part of it because she had a lot more taped pieces. Yeah. Than most. But… The tape piece with, like, the Super Bowl meal was…

That was the tater tots. The… What was it? Tater… I don't know. Tater Tinos? Something like that. Yeah.

It was hilarious. But then Melissa McCarthy. Oh, my God. I was… I had finished watching it. Yasa came upstairs. I rewound it and I was like, please watch this with me. So I've now watched it four times because today I've rewound it and watched it so many

more times. It was hilarious. But do you think that they, like, she looked identical to him. So is it one of those things where she looks in the mirror and she's like, I think I can pull this off? Or does someone come up to, like, it was, she looked identical. Imagine if you look in the mirror and say, hey, I'm actually Sean Spicer. Yeah.

Anyways, I loved it. It was so good. It was so good. I'm glad that we agree on Kristen Stewart. Like, I mean, mostly it was the monologue. I think that there were parts in the show that, like that, the first sketch where she was playing that college student who was… Oh, Head Shaped The…

That was kind of like, meh for me. Sure. But overall, I felt like, hey, which is what I wrote about, I was like, I think that when she goes on Saturday Night Live, she's actually going to have a sense of humor about herself, which is what that monologue was about. Yes. She had a sense of humor about herself. Yeah, that was like one of my favorite Saturday Night Lives in a long time.

I thought… I was like laughing lots and lots and lots. Anyways, I thought it was great. Also, she's hot. She… Yeah. She's gorgeous. Yeah, especially did you see her body in that… when she was… in that… when she was playing

Giselle in that Family Feud skit? Yeah. Jesus. In the heels and then like sticking her body… like her hip out and whatever. Yeah. Yeah, she's hot. It made me want to get more tattoos. Really…

Okay. Can we talk about another show that I really love? Riverdale? Duanna's been talking about Riverdale. Okay, talk to me about it. Well, it's… First of all, the guy is really hot to me. The ginge.

I mean, there's… I can't believe there are, like, so many gingers in this show, and all of them are popular, which is great. So, for people who… Yay, gingers! Yay, gingers. It's just a take on… Like, it's like a cruel, intention-y take on Archie comics, basically.

And a little dark. Dark and… Yeah. Yeah, kitschy and really, really good. So if you haven't started… You have to. You will love it. I haven't started, but I have been hearing a lot about it, so I'm thinking maybe on

a flight soon. I have a flight coming up or… Yeah, where are you going? Actually, no, next weekend. Next weekend I have a lot of time because I'm like literally chained to my house with dog… Oh, right, because the dog's gone. Yeah.

There. Bank some and you'll be happy. Yeah. Okay, shall we? Yes. Okay, so first question. Hey, I have a question. Let's just get into it.

There's no like, hi, Satchel Dainey. I love this. I love that you're direct, whoever you are. Hey, I have a question. What would you do in this situation? I thought I lost my coat on New Year's Eve this year. Then I ran into my ex-roommate this week who was at the same party and she was wearing it. It's a long leopard coat from Topshop.

She has a low-key history of stealing, borrowing people's things without asking. Or alternatively, I may just steal it back. My friend lives with her now and she's going away next week. The thing is there was a hole that I got stitched up and I had my friend take a pic of the coat at her house and the stitch is quite obvious. What would you do? Isn't this so… I fucking love this dilemma.

Yes, I know, right? Okay, so what do you do when you have a friend who's a low-key thief? and first of all the audacity of showing up like wherever you are and wearing your fucking shit you know what when you're a klepto you gotta own that shit right like you can't pretend you can't look fucking sketchy you gotta put on that fucking coat that you stole and walk in like it's yours so so i'm kind of kudos that you can do that you're a little you're showing some admiration for the klepto no no no of course not but you know like kind of hats off that you can just lie like that and just own shit that's not yours.

That is gargantuan ballsness, especially in your tight group of friends. It's monster ballsness. I would never, but if I fucking ripped off a friend, I would be like, I'm never showing up wearing her fucking shit. I imagine, like, we had this, oh, you'll be interested in this. We had this chat on the social a few weeks ago about scents, like a person's personal scent and loving perfume and what your fragrance is. And I don't have a signature scent yet.

But I always dream about jacking someone's signature scent. Because like we have a friend called Callie. Callie smells so fucking good. I have to rewind and think what Callie smells like. I'm sure she smells great. Callie smells so good. And every time I see her, I'm like, oh, Callie, you smell so good. What are you wearing?

And then for years in the back of my mind, I've been like, should I jack Kelly's scent? But I haven't. But you can't. No, you can't. You cannot jack someone's personal scent. No, no. It's so like signature to them. Yeah.

Our friend Dan Levy, he always smells really delicious. I don't know what the fucking cologne is that he wears. We've asked him and he's told me and then he told me I couldn't wear it, which is fair. You have to stake claim to your scent. So imagine like a coat and a leopard print coat is pretty, yeah, it's not just like a plain black coat. No. Yeah.

So she knows what she's doing. I don't know. I wonder, it's like, I kind of, I'm vibing that this isn't like a best friend. So this is just like a friend. They live together. So. This is, no, she lives with another friend. No, but she lived with her before.

Oh, right, right. Right? So they might not be super tight, but they obviously run in the same circle. I don't know if you live with someone before. Well, I think if you realize that your ex-roommate was a fucking klepto, you kind of have some arm's length. Right. So Jacek…

Okay. So anyway, so you're setting… Jacek has decided that he wants to chime in here, but as usual, we are not letting him. Anyway, be quiet, Jacek. Like, no. Imagine there's a wall between you. Like in a real studio. No.

The producer is behind a glass wall. No, in this case, he's right next to me. Okay, I… you know what? I think that someone needs to be called on their shit when their shit is being stolen right in front of their fucking eyes. So I would probably just send a text just to be like, hey, dude, what's up? You know what's so crazy? I lost my coat during New Year's and I think I'm pretty sure I saw you wear it yesterday.

Do you mind checking in the pocket? Because if it is, mine had a stitch in it. If that's it, do you mind getting it, like, do you mind if I get it back from you? Can't you just call a stealer a stealer? You don't have to say sorry. You don't have to pretend like, oh, no big deal. Like, it's me. You don't have to dance around the fucking issue.

You stole my fucking coat. I would like it back now. No hard feelings, but I'd like my fucking coat back. I just have to say that this is, like, one of the reasons, like, one of my great fears. Like leaving my shit somewhere at a party and then not, at the end of the night, not getting it back. You know, you go to a party and you're like, you leave your bag somewhere. Oh yeah, I never do.

And I always have like all my personal belongings all over me. Well, we went to a party recently where you had to put your coats in like this room and I was like, I was wearing my fucking puffy winter jacket, whatever. But I love my puffy coat so much. I love it. It's para-jumpers. There's the plug. the high pair of jumpers

I love you I paid full price I just want to let you know everybody this is not like I'm not being paid to say this it's from Italy

my coat was essentially I love this coat so much they didn't bring it in in Canada for whatever fucking reason I don't know it's amazing

I don't understand why people wouldn't want this coat it is a really good coat and so I ordered it online from Italy it came I have worn it

every single day all December, all January, and so far all of February. I have not, not worn this coat. Okay, so what would happen if someone took your fucking pair of jumpers? Holy shit. Okay, rewind. Feel the rage. And then someone, we're walking at our building at work, and you see the person that was at

that party wearing your fucking pair of jumper. What do you do? I, like, to me, I would like to think, in the back of my mind, I would like to think that that's a throw down. And you know what? But you know that it's your para-jumper because it's the only fucking para-jumper of this kind. It's the only fucking para-jumper in Canada.

Well, I mean, like, not in Canada, but like I ordered… For fucking all intents and purposes. Yeah. Okay. You know it's yours is what I'm saying. I know it's mine. I know it's mine. I don't know.

I would like to think that I would be… It would be a throwdown. I would go up and be like, that's my coat. Okay. But this is your friend. So you're going to confront her like a crazy person? I don't know. Like, these are the things you imagine, but then can you truly execute it?

So, advice giver, this is what we're here to do. What you're saying is like you would send a text and be like, hey, can I have my coat back? And then I would also provide that proof of being like, there's a stitch in that pocket. So you're not straight up accusing her at first, but then you're like, but hold up a second. If there's this stitch in there, it's mine. But you're giving her an out.

Why? What's the out? You just want your coat back. The out is like, hey, I lost my coat. I think I saw you wearing it. Can you check? No, I think I saw you wearing it. I saw you wearing it.

I saw you wearing it. Can you check the pocket? Yeah. If it has a stitch in it, it's mine. And I'd like it back. Give it back. And so you're giving that person like a backdoor. You're like, she could be like, oh, I'm sorry.

I mistook it for mine. It must be yours. Great. I don't care. I want my fucking coat back. Oh, please. And I'm not here to… I'm not here as a…

I don't want the backdoor. You want to confront your friend and be like, you're a klepto fucking maniac. Not only do I want my fucking coat, you need to go to therapy. You're fucked up. No. I would, as Jacek momentarily recommended, the difference in this case is that she's been presented with a revenge opportunity, which is to thief back. Okay.

Like, you know this person's leaving town. The coat's going to be fucking hanging there. Or how about if she takes it with her on the trip? Then opportunity missed. If she doesn't take it with her on the… Here's what I would do. Okay. If she doesn't take it with her on the trip, you get your friend to take it from your friend

or the ex-roommate and return it to you and you fucking flaunt that shit the next time there's a gathering. You make a next time gathering. You're like, the week after, you're like, hey, everybody, let's all get together for… Let's celebrate Friday. We're all going to be outside. Yeah. Let's celebrate Friday and like, you know, let's show up and make sure we gather on

the sidewalk first before going into the bar. You make sure that you are seen. Okay. This is your friend, by the way. An ex-roommate. Okay, sure. I don't know. If somebody… Fight fire with fire. That's what you're doing. If somebody violates your, like, your personal property, essentially, violates your trust and takes from you, I don't see that this is fire back with fire. It's like, I'm just taking what's mine. But don't… And I listen. I agree with you, but can't you give that person the heads up? Like, I know that you took this. Like, I just don't think that person gets to get away with stealing something.

That's true, Sasha. I agree with you. Okay. So maybe if she leaves the coat behind on her trip, then you say, hey, I just got Sarah, Julie, whoever lives with Klepto right now, I just got Sarah, Julie, Jane, Claire to grab my coat back from you. So just FYI. Yeah.

FYI. Okay. So you're… That's a good move. I like this. So you are still kind of shaming your friend. So you're telling me that don't say anything, get the current roommate to steal the coat back, then you send the text and say, hey, P.S., I just found my coat at your house.

Jane, Amanda, Tony gave it back to me. Correct. Thanks. See you at the next party. Yeah. I wouldn't even say I found my coat at your place because we're not snooping through her shit. It's just like, hey, I saw you wearing my coat the other day.

It's my coat. So I just got Jane, Tony, Amanda to grab it for me while you're away. FYI. Oh, okay. See you next week. I like that. That bridges both of our feelings together. Yeah, that's a collaboration between your view and my view.

Okay. Then you let Klepto know that you know she's a Klepto and you're calling her out for her Klepto-ness. and you like as you say fight fire with to me right what's right revenge right right okay i like that i feel satisfied i do too okay next but that is oh my god like that was just off no fuck i can't imagine i know i know can you fucking imagine and the nerve anyway either way i get your coat i want my fucking coat back yeah um but now this gives me even more reason like i when i'm at a party or whatever and it's wintertime, I'm hanging on to all my shit.

Like I'm one of those people. Remember the last time we were out at Kathleen's birthday and I like literally shoved the coat behind your back like you were sitting on my coat because I was like, if anyone steals this shit, I'm going to kill them. And girl to girl, when I was leaving, I made sure to find you. That is the code, right? You did such a solid. You were still carrying my coat waiting for me.

Oh, I loved you. That's right. I meant to say thank you for that. To me, that is like what we do for each other. Yes. Because I'm like… You're not going to walk away with my coat. Well, I wouldn't want you to leave my fucking para-jumper.

Like, if I had given you that responsibility, I would have expected you to, like, live up to it. So I was like, okay, Sasha entrusted me with her coat. I feel like I am the most trustworthy person for you because you know me. Yes. So thank you for that. Anyway, so everybody out there, do your friends a solid. Monitor everybody's shit.

Yeah. Okay, next question. Man, that got me fired up. I know. It was good, right? Okay, dear Sasha and Lainey, I'm dying of embarrassment and I need your advice on what to do. I've been crushing on the guy, let's call him Jack, for about a year.

We work at the same coffee shop. I'm 23 and he's 25. Okay, I love coffee shop romance, so let's paint the picture here. Yep. These are two baristas. Yes. We always flirt and have fun doing our shifts. Needless to say, I fell hard for him, secretly though.

But yesterday after talking to my best friend about my feelings, she told me to ask him out already. So I got the courage to ask him out to go see a movie. We had both been talking about going to see Moonlight. Excellent choice. Definitely go see it. Sasha and I both loved it. Yeah, we were just talking about it.

So I asked him, and what transpired has to be the worst 30 seconds of my life. Oh, no. He looked all flustered and totally deflected and pretended he had to go to the stockroom. I died. I actually still feel like I'm dead. I don't think I read our chemistry wrong, but maybe I did. So what do I do now? How do I face him this week?

How can I work after he dissed me so badly? Do I quit? Do I talk to him about it? Do I pretend it didn't happen? Please help. Please don't use my real name. Okay. Well, we're not going to use your real name, but I will give you a name of…

Like a name that's always used in rom-coms. We'll call you Kate. Okay. Everybody in a rom-com is called Kate. Yeah. Kate and Jack. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Do you remember my most embarrassing moment?

Do you not remember… Does this not trigger anything for you? Because this triggers… Well, why don't you tell everybody? But do you know what I'm talking about or no? I have like two things that I'm thinking of. What are the two things? Just go.

No, what are the two things? I'll tell you after. No, what are the two things? I want to know if you actually have two things that are really embarrassing. No, it has to do with one of your exes. No. Okay. Then that's one of the things.

The one that I told you? Okay. So this is like… Listen, I'm here to help. So I'm going to offer the most embarrassing thing ever. Except I do want to hear about what I did with my ex. But anyways, when I was like 27, I was working at MTV in London, England. Younger than 27.

Okay, I don't know. 25. I don't know. Did I know you were something? How old… How do you know how old I was? Because I knew you already when you were 27. Oh, really?

Yeah. Oh, right. That's true. Okay, so maybe I was like 22. Whatever. Yeah. I was fucking… You were young.

You were a baby. So, I was working at MTV and I was doing a junket for Van Wilder. Does this not trigger anything yet? There we go. Okay. Yes, now. So, Van Wilder starring Tara Reid, who I was actually a personal assistant to, who is another story, was a fucking cunty cunt cunt to me.

And then… Your Tara Reid stories are the best. Yeah. And Ryan Reynolds. Yeah. And Ryan Reynolds is from Vancouver and happened to be like a fairly decent friend of one of my friends. I've never met Ryan Reynolds in my life before at that time.

And so I was living in London. I'd been living there for a year. I was kind of wrapping up my stay there. My friends had kind of left. So I was… and I didn't have like a great dating life there. Anyway, so I am… after the junket interview, I'm like, you know what? I'm like bored. Like I'm going home soon.

I have like nothing to do. And you're 22. You're fearless. And you know what? You're fearless. I'm looking pretty good at 22. Like, that's probably my best years of my fucking life. Right.

So I'm feeling confident. I've got a job at MTV. I'm feeling good. Yeah. I know this guy. So our interview goes well. And then I'm like… So I left him a note.

So after the junket, I left him a note, which was like, hey… I forget exactly what I said. Basically like, hey, I'm friends with our mutual friend. And if you're, like, staying in town for, like, a night or a couple nights, let me know. I left my number and my email. Well, obviously, you know what happened. Fucking nothing. Ryan Reynolds straight up da-da-dissed me.

So I feel our readers pain because that was so embarrassing. Not only was it embarrassing personally, but like I like totally crossed professional fucking lines as well by asking someone out on a fucking date. With like on a sticky note. And on a sticky note to Ryan Reynolds. Like who? Granted, he was just doing Van Wilder. It's not like we're talking about fucking Ryan Reynolds now.

But either way. Right. He would have been with, like, Alanis at the time, right? Well, so, cut to that apparently was the excuse because Ryan Reynolds told our mutual friend that I had asked him out. Oh, fuck. That's right. Oh, my God.

I fucked it out of my mind because I'm so mortified for you. Yes, because it's so horrifying. What did he say again? He was like, by the way, P.S., Sasha left me a sticky note with her number. Because he was dating Alanis Morissette at the time. Even if he wasn't dating Alanis Morissette, I'm pretty sure he wasn't fucking interested. Anyway, so that's my horrifying story as my hands are sweating and I feel like totally red in the face.

But so, but so this is it. I felt totally like a big old fucking loser for two days. What would happen if now you were sent on assignment to go interview Ryan Edelman? Yeah, I'd fucking ask him out again. Nothing. No, but like would you say yes to the assignment or would you be like… He would never, ever, ever, ever remember me. Never.

Never. But like, let's try it. But, um, but so it felt like shit for two days. But then I was like, I like gave myself a little pat on the back after I like felt really bad about myself. Cause I was like, what the fuck? I'm 22 fucking living in London. I get like, you just, you, I was taking chances. I was taking chances and I got dissed. But like, I'm so much happier. Even after like a couple of days after that, I was like, great story to tell. Yeah. That I got dissed. Yeah. But it also just makes you stronger. It's not one of those things where you need to fucking like die and then think you're disgusting and no guy will ever like you. You're just like, fuck. Like guys do, like we know tons of guys who fucking hit on girls and

get smacked down all the time, right? All the time. It's part of fucking life and you got to be a go-getter sometimes. And sometimes you're not going to get the shit that you want, but at least you fucking tried. I agree with you 100%. For her though, for Kate, we need to figure out how she operates now that she's back at work. Because she has to see him, whatever, every other day. You play it cool, yo. You play it cool. Yeah.

You play it cool, like whatever, you just, you know, hey, I just asked you to go see a movie. If you want to go see a movie, whatever, I have other people to go see a movie with me. Like, yeah. The whole point is now it's time to put on the mask. Put on the mask. And it's not like you asked, it's not like you professed your love. You asked somebody to go to a movie.

Really. Yeah. Obviously, you had some feelings behind that, but he doesn't necessarily know what those feelings were. Yeah. And you don't… Like, that's right. When you live in your head, and we all live in our head, we think that everybody else

is in our head. But right now, you have to remember, he's not in your head. He doesn't know all the months and months that you've spent fantasizing about him. He doesn't know about, you know, the screenplay that you've written about the two of you and the names that you've given your… Say your movie montages. That's right. He hasn't, he doesn't know what your movie montages are.

He doesn't know that you've already named your kids. Like, none of that shit. He is oblivious to that. All he has is that two minutes where you said, hey, do you want to go see Moonlight? And he fucking ran away. And, like, he ran away into the back room. So, to me, you have to remember that he has no idea that you're carrying all these weeks and months of a crush.

You just go in and you're like, whatever. Nothing has changed. You know what? You say, you fucking go see Moonlight and you go back in and be like, dude, you missed a fucking good movie. Moonlight's awesome. Like, it's no thing. Nothing has changed.

You continue. To protect your heart, you may not want to flirt as hard. To protect your heart, you may want to like… Give the idea of him up. Yes. Stop the movie montage in your head. Don't name the kids anymore. But outwardly, nothing changes.

Right now, pride is everything. Totally. I agree. Pride and face is everything. So if you want to fucking look a little better, you know, I'm good. I'm down with that. I'm down with like you wearing your best pair of jeans in next time you see them. I'm down with you getting a blowout.

Yeah, totally. Yeah, for your next shift. No problem. But our point here is that the mask comes on and you are totally 100% cool and chill as fuck. Fuck. And then also, at the end of the day, really give yourself a pat on the back because, like, you fucking did something.

You put yourself out there. Yeah, I like that. You put yourself out there. It didn't work out. He doesn't need to know. No. You tell it to everybody else. Tell it to Sasha and Lainey.

Tell it to your parents. Yeah. Tell it to your landlord. I don't care who you tell it to, but he is not going to see that you're broken up about this. At least you didn't ask out a fucking celebrity. So there's that, right? So…

It worked out okay for you. That's true. Now you know what people are going to be saying, though. They're going to be like, Sasha, what are your stories about Tara Reid? Oh. For next time. Yeah, for next time. A pertinent question.

For next time. All I'll say is… But please submit your questions about working for an asshole. Yes. I can really help you with that. Those stories will come out if you ask a real question about working for an asshole. Okay. Next.

Dear Sasha and Lainey, I'm not sure if this is a red flag or not, but here it goes. My BF of two months and I have been dating. I really like him. I'm not sure he's the one, as I'm only 27, but you never know. We are taking it slow. Rather, I want to, but he's really in for the long haul. He always talks about marriage and kids, which is nice, but it's more fast forward than I'm into.

Here's the issue. He wants to know where I am all the time. He texts me when I'm out with my girlfriends at least five times during the night. Typically, he's just texting emojis and stuff, but he always wants me to text him when I get home. And when I forget, we then have to get in a big fight. I feel like he's trying to control me and I don't like that feeling as I've had boyfriends in the past try to do that to me.

Is this a problem or am I being a bitch? Love, O. All right, O. I don't think that that's a problem. I think like, isn't that nice that he's just like checking in and it's not like he's like texting her and be like, yo, bitch, where are you? He's like texting fucking heart faces and shit like that. Am I reading this wrong?

Maybe I don't, I'm not finding this like, he sounds, yeah, like a touch overbearing. Yeah. But nothing that you probably couldn't talk to him about. See, I, I see it the same way as you. I don't see that this guy is like, why are you going out with your friends? Who are you going with? Submit a list of names of people that you're going to be with. Totally.

Send me photos. Yeah. To me, this is a little bit more about safety, right? Yeah, like text me when you get home. That's a nice thing. Like I just want to make sure you're okay. Yeah. Yeah. I guess we could get into our personal lives here. Jacek, like, I mean, we never have

an issue of a possessiveness, but he does like to know where I am. And there have been times where if I haven't texted for three hours and I'm out, he will text me. And sometimes, although this is rare, because I'm always checking my phone, sometimes I will forget. Like, I will be at a party and there'll be a lot of handshaking to do, like, a work party, you know. In my job, Sometimes you have to go to these work parties and you kind of have to be like schmoozy schmooze. Hi. How are the kids? Keep busy.

Yeah. And whatever. And so there have been times where I haven't texted him in three hours or whatnot. And he'll like, because he knows all my friends, he'll text all my friends who he knows will be there. He's never done that with me. You weren't there at that party. Just to check where you are.

He'd be like, hey, are you with Elaine? Like, where is she? And I don't feel like that's oppressive. Right. To me, I take it as shit, like, he's probably worried about me, which is nice. Yeah. And he, if I'm out late, we were just talking about, there was a period, I guess a couple of years ago, where we had a friend who was seeing this fucker, and I had to go out with

her, like, it was all weekend, and we would stay out till four o'clock in the morning. Yeah, you partied a fuckload. Fuck. But it was, like, wingman partying. I know it was work, but, like, you secretly also enjoyed it, too. Well, I liked watching the high school- I know you did. development of this non-relationship. He was such a jackass. But I was there for her because

it was like emotional support and we would stay out till fucking 4 or 5 o'clock in the morning and I would text him or I would like… Plus, these were nights where I wouldn't leave the house till like midnight to go out and whatever. Anyway, so I think it's just about… Courtesy. Courtesy. Yeah. Yeah. Now, you've talked about the fact that like when your husband goes out late at night, you're like, oh my God, I can't go to sleep. Oh man, I stalk Corey. I think you talked about it on the show before.

Oh yeah, yeah. I mean, when Corey doesn't, like last night, he didn't get home until like 2.45 and then I didn't sleep because I was worrying about him before and then fucking was up after. But for me, I, like that's our, that's my biggest gripe with him is when he goes out, he doesn't, he has so much fun that he doesn't ever check his phone. He doesn't ever check in and that pisses me off. Yeah. He knows that.

But I fucking text him all the time, like, every, like, couple of hours. I'm like, where are you? Mostly because I'm, like, always afraid for his safety because I think he's fucking a fool. But I try to check up on him all the time just to see where he's at. And I think that he finds that annoying. But I'm like, I need to know that you're alive. That'll just, like, that puts me at ease.

Yeah. I don't, listen, I don't give a fuck who you're with. Like, I'm not, I'm not checking in on him because I'm like, are you doing something bad? Like, are you with another girl? Nothing like that. Yeah. It's just like, where are you?

You're okay? Like, you're in a safe place? He probably would… He thinks it's unnecessary because he's always like, I'll be fine. Right. Relax. I'm coming home. But I like the check-in.

I really appreciate the check-in. Right. So for me, when I'm listening to our writer's problem, I'm like, I think she needs to take a little bit of a fucking chill pill because he's just trying to be nice. And like, yeah, he is just trying to be respectful. Yeah. And caring and… But the undercurrent here is that I feel like if she was into this guy, like super into

him, then she wouldn't mind. Right. Right? Yes. She would find that cute and endearing like we do with our partners. Yeah, exactly. Like, I don't find it annoying when Jacek does it to me. No.

And although Corey's like, I'll be fine, whatever, and thinks it's unnecessary, he doesn't hold it against you. It's not a turnoff for him. Exactly. Yeah. So, to me, if it's a turnoff for you, O, I want to know what your name is that starts with O, but okay. Odessa.

Odessa. We're giving her Odessa? I like the name Odessa. Okay, Odessa. If it's so annoying to Odessa, then this is probably more about the fact that it should maybe be a little ping for you that I don't know if this is the dude for you. Like, he clearly is more serious and wants a future with you. You're like, meh, I don't know.

I'm only 27. Like, I don't want to talk about this. Like, I think that if this was the guy for you and you were as committed and as into it as he is, then you wouldn't be annoyed by this. And number two, you'd probably feel a lot stronger about him. So maybe this is a little signal for you. Like, why are you wasting this guy's time? He's clearly a nice guy.

Yeah. Like, the idea that she doesn't want to be locked down. Yeah. But then I also think, and I totally agree with you, but before you kind of, like, toss the idea of him out of your life, I would probably just, like, yeah, like, maybe take a little nugget from what Lainey and I have said, which is, like, he's just doing it to be nice so that maybe your back doesn't get up and that you start to cause rifts in this relationship when there doesn't need to be.

Like, I know you've been burned before by other dudes who have been controlling. That sucks. I'm glad you've moved on from that. But now you have, like, a nice person who I don't think is asserting his control here. At least not from what you've told us. Yeah. It doesn't seem like a power thing. I think it just seems like maybe you're misconstruing it as a power thing.

So I would take a beat and just, like, see if you can level a playing field here and just know that he's not out to get you. So if it becomes more of a problem, fuck, yes, let's… we don't need to revisit. We can revisit, yeah. Yeah. But at this point, like, I would just see… maybe just take a little bit of, like, change your mind frame a bit, see if that works out, and then if you're still fucking annoyed with him, you're probably just annoyed with him, and then you can leave him.

Yeah, for sure. I mean, also be careful what you wish for because you might have this one person who is super wonderful and you're not really appreciating it that much. Yeah, exactly. And there are a lot of other people out there who are like, I don't give a fuck what you do. Yeah. And then you go to the opposite side of the spectrum.

So anyway, but carefully consider your feelings. Yes. And if this is not the guy for you, then back the fuck up and maybe stop wasting his time or reassess how you feel about this. Okay. That's it for us. Thanks for joining us. Yes.

Thanks for supporting us. Check us out on Google Play and iTunes. And keep your questions coming to me at Sasha at LadyGossip.com. And we will be taking a one-week hiatus from this podcast. So nothing next week, but we'll be back the week after. Bye. Bye. Be safe.