When Reality Hits with Jax and Brittany - In The Mind of a Man: Hookup Culture & The Evolution of Relationships

Episode Date: January 24, 2025

On today’s episode of “In the Mind of a Man”, Jax delves into the rampant hook up culture we are seeing today and the effects it’s having on monogamous relationships. Jax reveals the first time he lost his virginity, his one and only “boujie behavior,” he also explores whether or not men and women can have platonic relationships and he finally explains that “JetBlue fiasco.” A special pop in by Jax and Brittany’s publicist, Lori Krebs where they divulge some never told behind-the-scenes stories about Jax!  Please support the show by checking out our sponsors! G-DEFY - Go to Gdefy.com and use the promo code REALITYHITS for 50% off all orders. JLo Beauty: Head to JLOBeauty.COM/REALITYHITS for 20% off and THREE FREE LIMITED TIME OFFER GIFTS - a one hundred and seventy-five dollar value. Nutrafol: Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code REALITYHITS Progressive: Quote your car insurance at Progressive.com to join the over 28 million drivers who trust Progressive. Discover Your New Home at apartments.com 

What's up guys and welcome back to In the Mind of a Man. How are you? First of all, happy, happy new year to everybody. You know, I was really looking forward to starting a brand new year because man, 2024 was probably the hardest year of my life. No words can really describe it. Unfortunately, 2025 has really started off horribly. The heartbreak I have felt watching my city of LA completely burned to shreds has been absolutely devastating to say the least. I think everyone knows one person who has lost their home in these wildfires or is just suffering or somebody hit and has a family member that lost their home. There's just really no words to describe it. My heart goes out to everyone that has been impacted. And I want to give a huge thank you to the

incredible firemen out there. Man, I've been watching these videos of these pilots just dumping water on these fires and how they maneuver is just absolutely amazing. So the first responders, the frontline workers have literally risked their lives and continue to work tirelessly to contain these fires. Please consider donating to the Red Cross to help in any way. There's many, many organizations that can help support and I will continue posting them on my Instagram. So today's episode is a great one, guys. So buckle up. So much to unpack here. And I'm really, really excited. I hope you guys are really enjoying the In the Mind of the Man podcast. And yeah, let me know if there's anything you want to talk

about in the future, but let's get going. So I want to talk about something I was thinking about. And that's today's hookup culture. I don't think we've really talked about this yet and just how really rampant it's become. More and more people seem to be looking less and less for meaningful connections, but instead like prioritizing random hookups or sexual encounters, I guess, with different people instead of committed relationships. So I got a little story here, and this came from a family member's friend of a friend. And this was happening in junior highs and high schools

where this is just, this is absolutely disturbing to me, that girls are wearing different color wristbands, kind of like hair ties, rubber bands, that are different colors. And this signifies what they do sexually. And I was like in shock when I heard this because I'm just thinking back in high school when I was in high school, I mean, we barely held hands with people. Now girls are wearing wristbands to let boys know or girls know what they do sexually.

I literally was jaw dropped. I mean, this seems to be starting at like such a young age now. And so it got me thinking about like the evolution of relationships and marriages in general, and just how differently things have progressed from generations ago. I'm going to tell you a little bit about my story real quick and on how I lost my virginity. And it really goes along, if you had to describe it, anybody seen American Pie? It's literally just like that. I was a late bloomer, I was 19 years old,

I was with a bunch of my friends, and there were some girls up there, we literally got a cabin in up north Michigan, on the lake, very small cabin, and each couple had their turn in the single bedroom, it was a very small cabin, so there was only one bedroom. And well, when it was my turn, I was dating somebody at the time, or interested, I guess, and she was a little older.

And when it was our turn, I don't know how it got brought up, but I said that I've done this before. Clearly, I haven't. And I don't know if I want to get too in-depth with this, but let's just say it was very, very awkward. I had no idea really about, I'm going to be very PG about this, PG-13. I had no idea, let's just say, how to warm up the car. We're going to put it in car terms because I'm a car guy.

I had no idea about foreplay, how kind of just getting it going. I grew up in a very, very conservative neighborhood, town, school, it was a different time, it was the late 90s. We just didn't deal with stuff like that when I was in school. It was holding hands, it was varsity jackets,

football games, keggers, like I said, dating the cheerleader, I did all that. I did all that, but we didn't really, you know, there was no sexual thing. So again, I didn't lose my virginity until I was out of high school. And then I started hanging out with different kids from different high schools. And then, sure enough, that's kind of when it hits.

So I ended up, you know, doing the deed. And yeah, it was probably the most amazing thing ever. I was like a rabbit after that. I was like a rabbit. I was born in 79, like I said, and I look back at my grandparents' generation. During that time, divorces were basically unheard of. Even if you were unhappy in your marriage, people just stuck it out. They were still together.

They just kind of went with the motion because it was frowned upon to get divorced in those times. It was just, you were looked at like, Ooh, that couple's, it just, it wasn't a good thing to do. Like you just stuck it out and you were miserable in your marriage. Um, you know, uh, what was this? I'm sorry. Um, you know, then it became a little bit more, you know, accepted like during

my parents' generation, but still nowhere where it is today. Today I feel like people just get married for sport on a Tuesday. There's something to do. People get divorced and they don't really put the effort in. It's just the idea of marriage has lost its... We were looking for this word earlier and I can't find this word, but the, the, the idea of marriage has lost its like significance. It's lost its, you know, what marriage used to be about. It was a really,

really big deal. And I feel like as the world went on, we lost all that. And you know, I think too, when I, how I felt about it, you just see celebrities, you would see celebrities getting married, like just abruptly and they would be like, oh, this, this, so and so got married would see celebrities getting married, just abruptly. They would be like, oh, so and so got married and then they got divorced a week later. I think that may have started it. I used to watch a lot of MTV when I got home from school and you used to see all these celebrities getting married for sport.

I think that's kind of what maybe springboarded that. Now, my generation today, more than half of all marriages, I did the research on this, more than half of all marriages I did the research on this more than half all marriages are ending in divorce and You know obviously guys my excitement level when it comes to marriage isn't at a at a high right now And I think you guys all know that so every single every single day You know I hear about another couple that's that's divorcing It's really you know you throw a rock close your eyes and throw a rock you're gonna hit somebody that's divorcedcing. It's really, you know, you throw a rock, close your eyes and throw a rock, you're gonna hit somebody that's divorced or going through one.

I mean, I can probably ran, you know, I could probably think about three to five people right now that are going through a divorce. And obviously COVID wasn't easy for a lot of people. The divorce rates spiked during then, but I think just in general, people are, you know, not really giving it a try. They kind of just copping out early.

What does this mean for the generations to come? I have no idea. I don't know if marriage is going to be done away with. The way I see hookup culture today and the modern dating world as it stands, is it possible that monogamous relationships won't even exist anymore. I always had, well, I want to know what your guys' thoughts are, but I always had this idea of I think marriages should be kind of like owning a driver's license. I think every 10 years you need to re-up.

I think it would save a lot of money, a lot of stress, a lot of discomfort. I know it sounds pretty crazy to think that, but think about it for a second. You get married and then every, I don't know, maybe five to 10 years you go through the I know it sounds pretty crazy to think that, but think about it for a second. You get married, and then every, I don't know, maybe five to ten years, you go through the process, like the DMV, and you say, okay, I want to stay married or not. And if you don't, you walk away.

I don't know, what are your thoughts on that? What do you guys think? Because I honestly think that's where we're headed. Is this due to social media? I think so. Maybe the dating apps? I mean, the world is so small because of social media. I think the standards are set so high because you're seeing such, I'm going to say it,

bullshit on social media. You're seeing bullshit. You're seeing things that are fake. You're seeing these shiny-faced people, facetuned people. You're seeing people put things on Instagram that's not necessarily true, in my opinion. We talked about this in previous podcasts, and just how many women, I guess, and men too, talk about how incredible their date was. They had the time of their lives, they were swept off their feet, and then a day later

they were ghosted. You could probably blame a lot of this to the bachelor because they have these unrealistic first dates. A date in Fiji, a date on an island, a date on a yacht. And then you watch this, you're like, well, and then you go into real life, right? And then you're like, wait a minute, why are we going to Applebee's? You know, like stuff like that. And again, this is due to TV, social media, right? And like I said, people are like swept off their feet, you know, and then never, some people never hear from that person again, you media, right? And like I said, people are like swept off their feet, you know, and then never, some people never hear from that person again, you know, without closure or an explanation. In my opinion, I think this does have to do with the fact that we, the way that our society

is built today. I personally think that, I mean, you guys could probably argue with me, guys don't really have to work for it anymore. You know, you don't really have to work for it anymore. You don't have to buy them a drink. I feel like the chase is kind of gone. Again, social media. Think about it.

Back in my day in high school slash college, all these social media platforms didn't exist. Maybe we had one. We had AIM. I don't know if people remember AIM. I know that's my generation. I think- BBM. Oh, we had AIM. I don't know if people remember AIM. I know that's my generation. I think- BBM. Oh, we had BBM.

Yeah. And by the way, Lori is here with me, guys, as you guys know. So she's going to chime in here and there. I think I had a pager, to be honest. No, I don't think. I know I had a pager. I remember when my father took me to Best Buy, I begged him for one. And in those days, the only people who had pagers were drug dealers and doctors.

That was the only people who had pagers. And I was doctors. That was the only people who had pagers. And I was like, no, no, I have to have one. All my friends had one, which didn't really make sense because I was in grade school. Who the hell am I going to page? We're all in class together. It didn't really make any sense, right? And then what was I going to do? Hop out to the hallway and use a pay phone?

And who the hell was going to call? Who was going to page me? It didn't really make much sense. And in those days, like I said, p pages were used for if you were dating somebody, you did the 143, which meant I love you. Guys did the boobs, which was 8008. There was just different codes with different numbers to meet your friends. It wasn't, you know, it was more of a style thing.

It was more of a trend. You had the chains hanging off of it. It was just what it was. And you know, my pager would buzz and I'd have to go run to, like I said, run to a payphone or something like it. It was just really, really silly. So my parents and our grandparents' generations, you know, they didn't really have cell phones for God sakes. I mean, it's social media completely revolutionized relationships and marriages. I think it's, I think social media in general has hugely impacted not only relationships, but it's been a main

contributing factor to the mental health pandemic. And I can take, you know, I will 100% agree with that. You know, the mental health pandemic has become such a big thing now, and we are living in it. You know, so many more people now are battling with anxiety disorders, depression, and other mental health disorders. Let me get you a little story here real quick. So as people know, I recently visited a facility. And this is tough to talk about. So OK, I recently visited a facility, and they took away my phone for the first 72 hours.

Now, mind you, I've never in my life had my phone taken away from me. Never. And I got to say the first 24 hours was really, really hard. Not only being there was very vulnerable for me, but not having a phone and not being able to be in touch with the outside world, especially having a wife and a child and just everything that was going on at the time for me, it was really, really hard to stay focused on why I was there and to be present, to be taking

place, taking my therapy seriously without thinking in the back of my mind what is on my phone. But I got to say, after the first 24 hours, I was okay. I was okay. I was like, wow. And then when I got my phone back, there was a point where I'm like, I don't want it. I really don't want my phone. Adults in general don't know what it feels like to get their electronics taken away from

them. You know what I mean? So we know what it's like when you punish your child, you know, a nine-year-old boy take away their iPad and they go into a full-blown tantrum. And that's kind of like what you experienced, you know? Like it was so hard for you not to check in with Ryan and I for work. And even for us, it was just something completely different that we had to get used to. And guys, I want to make this very clear.

I think people kind of don't understand my relationship with Ryan and Lori. Ryan and Lori are not only, we all work together, but they're very close to me. They're like my family here. So I know a lot of people get confused, like why are they so close? Because they're my friends first. They're my family first.

Yes, we also all work together, but they have been like literally my, along with my sister, my rock through this. And I don't think I could have gotten through what I've gone through without them. They have literally checked in with me every single day. And that's not even their job. You know, they have other clients, they have other things to do, but they put that aside and put our friendship slash family, you know, first.

And it really, really helped me because if I didn't have that, I got to be honest, I don't know where I would be because I really didn't have anybody. I didn't have anybody. Nobody really knew that I was there other than Brittany. And Brittany and I obviously were not on good terms then. And you guys will see, you know, on the show, I really can't get too much into it. But people did know that you were there, because it did come out. Oh, you're right. Right. It did.

But I don't think people made a really big deal of it. It was all over TMZ and everything. Okay, maybe not, because again, I didn't have my phone. And when they did give it back, I'm not going to lie, I didn't want to use it. And until towards the end, I got a little aggressive with the phone. Because I felt like I was in prison a little bit and I, it was my only way out. And instead of taking it 100% seriously, you know, I would go to therapy and then I would go to my phone and I would rage text.

And it's just so hard to explain to people that aren't going through a divorce publicly. It is so, divorces are hard in general. But I do think at that time, the best thing for you would have been to have no phone completely the entire time. In retrospect, you know, for Brittany, for you, for... Like I said, if I had to change one thing, and I did my research in a lot of different institutions and they do give their phones back, it's not unheard of.

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Nutrifol.com spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L.com promo code reality hits. That's Nutrifol.com promo code reality hits. Just to get back, so the social media, of course, has it has its positives, like staying easily connected to people, promoting businesses and products to large audiences. So many people really rely on social media to make a living. I mean, I know a lot of people that rely on it. And it's kind of scary what's going on with TikTok right now, because people do make a living on it. You know, but the rest, in my opinion, is is very, very toxic. Because like I said, I mean, quite honestly, I'm guilty of it myself.

Let's be real for a second. This social media highlight reel is 100% true. The photoshopping, the face tuning of photos, people posting their best moments of their day, let's be honest, most of that's bullshit because they're going through a hard time. But they want other people to think that they're having a great time. Because again, it's an insecurity thing and it's what we want people to see. But it's not realistic. I think you get more out of things when you show what you're really going through, especially

as a parent, especially as somebody going through what I'm going through. It's nice to read things like that. I don't agree with the people crying into the phones. I think that's a little much because I think you're looking for something there and you're looking for sympathy. So that I'm a little confused about, but you see so many of these mom influencers, and this is what I'm trying to get at, posting their family photos in their matching outfits, going to church, stories and snippets of people's perfect marriages and relationships. That is all bullshit.

And if you're buying that, you're just as much of a fool as these people doing it, in my opinion. And that's what we all watch. That's what we watch all day long. And it's thrown in our faces. It's what we strive for, a perfectly curated life, which in all honesty, in this day and age is absolute shit. But guess what?

It doesn't exist. And I've said this a hundred times. You know, I'll be honest, the big reason why I really wanted to be part of the valley and create this show, I wanted to show the real and very raw lives of normal everyday people. It was my choice to put everything out there. It was my choice to talk about my divorce and what I was going through. It was my choice to talk about me going to an institution to better myself. Why? Because I want people to see this is real life. I'm not putting myself as an A-list celebrity at all, but I am somebody that's on TV. I am a public figure and I do have people that look up to me and call and

DM me and say, man, thank you so much for sharing. So if I can help one individual, then you know what? I've done my job and I'll feel happy. Regardless of what 90% of the people are going to say about me out there, you're this, you're that, you know what? Call me whatever you want, but this is real life. You know, the struggles and the challenges that people face and that, you know, I know everybody can relate to it. It's not easy sharing these dark sides of my life,

especially after the past year. Like I said, it was the worst year of my life. Other than my father's death, I can't imagine going through something like this, not only going through it, but going through it publicly with a child. So despite what many of you think, it's hard for me sometimes.

And that's sometimes, I'm gonna be honest, it's hard for me a lot. I sometimes I'm gonna be honest, you know, it's hard for me a lot You know, I know That 90% of the time I say I don't really give a fuck what anyone thinks and I truly And I truly I think I feel that most most of the time You know, I've been in this industry for such a long time and I've learned To really, you really block out the noise. But believe it or not, I'm a human being.

Yes, Jax Taylor is a human being. I do have a heart. It's buried very deep and might be a darker shade of red than it's supposed to, but I do have a heart. Some words, they hurt. They get under my skin. I think people are going to be really, as your publicist, I think people are going to be really surprised to hear you say that.

I'm happy you're saying it because what we see, and I'm always calling you saying, delete that. And Ryan, why are you responding in the comments section, calling people a clown and these things? Because it triggers me. Right. Because it actually does hurt. And I love that you're admitting that. And the people that are doing this have three followers, have an egg as a pitcher. And I know they're sitting in their parents' basement or wherever they are, they're pissed off that

their life didn't go the way they want. So what they're doing is projecting their insecurities out on me. That's exactly what they're doing. And I forget about that because sometimes I sit on my couch and I'll see thousands of great comments, but that one comment will piss me off. It's hurtful. It's definitely hurtful. Even Jax gets hurt. It gets under my skin. These commenters are keyboard warriors. It could be a lot sometimes, especially when you're struggling with your own mental health, which I've been very, very open about. Just trying to wake up every morning and face the fucking day is hard. But I know there's people out there watching and following my life and that connect with

my battles and my story. And again, that's my goal here. That's who I'm targeting. And that's the rewarding part of doing this show, is I can put it all out there. You can love me or you can hate me, but this is what I'm dealing with. It's raw and unfiltered. So, all right, enough of that.

I just kinda wanted to touch on that a little bit. So to go back to the hookup culture, while I were here, I read this and I found this extremely interesting. I wanna share it with you guys. I'm just gonna read it out loud here. The frequency of hookups has increased 1000% in the last 100 years. Why is this?

So during sexual encounters men and women release this hormone called I'm gonna butcher this but I'm gonna spell it. O-X-Y-T-O-C-I-N. Okay, so Oxytocin produces the euphoric high and feelings of emotional bond between partners during sex. Oxytocin effects are very powerful and what makes hookup culture so addictive. The hormone produces a sugar rush high and if you're ever eating yourself sick with candy, imagine this, you know that sugar highs are always a result in what? Crashing, like anything else.

Coffee, sugar, you crash, right? That's right. The rush you get after engaging in hot, steamy, one-night stand, you know, noncommitted relationships has some serious, drastic effects. Now, researchers report that people who are not depressed showed more depressive symptoms and experienced feelings of loneliness after engaging casual sex. Can I touch on this? Well, you could try. Okay. To me, in the past, before Brittany, I personally think casual hookups were kind of like a drug. I think it was something that I was looking for. I think it's codependency. I think I really didn't get anything out of it. It was kind of an instant gratification.

Again, I use the word for breeze. I've used it many times. I was for breezing a situation that I couldn't control, and I thought a casual hookup would fix it, but it would end up being worse. You know, and that's exactly why you're hosting in the mind of a man, because you were that person. I was that person, and I want to go back,

and I want to talk about why I've done what I've done and we'll get into this later but I am going to go back in the future and I'm going to start from season one of Vanderpump and I'm going to dissect all my relationships, all the dos and mostly all the don'ts of what I did and why I did them and I'm going to look back and probably shake my head at myself 99% of the time, me watching. Well, I'm going to probably shake my head at all of it. I'm just going to be like, Oh my God, what is this? Because as you guys know, I don't watch the show.

I think I've watched maybe two episodes of Vanderpump Rules because I don't like to watch myself on TV. I think people would want to know your opinion by you dissecting the other relationships. I'm going to dissect them and I'm going to talk about things that people don't know about. There's a lot that people don't know. I feel like because the show was 45 minutes long and we had so many cast members that they couldn't fit every scenario on the show in an hour long. There was a lot that wasn't in there that was pretty good stuff that people, they watched

the show and sometimes the dots didn't connect. It wasn't the show's fault or anything. It's just we ran out of time. And I think people, if they knew how fights or arguments or situations happened, they would understand it a little more. And that was really frustrating. And that's the part I want to dissect a little bit in the future. So anyways, we're going to get back to casual hookups.

Sorry, I go on these tangents sometimes and I talk about other things, but I'm excited to get into that in the future. So casual hookups are, in my opinion, tricky. They definitely don't work long term, that's for sure. And it may work for a while, but the one person usually, I want to say the female, I hate to say it, but I think the female usually ends up more attached than the other. I feel like you're right by saying that. And I'm not trying to offend anybody, but in my opinion, in my past, the female tends

to fall. And you want to know why? Because we talked about this last week, bread crumbing, love bombing. Guys want to keep the girl on the roster, regardless of how they feel about them. In that moment, they might want to put her on the shelf for a while and try something else, but they want to make sure they get her back. So okay, topific topics. I'm going to go on a different side real quick on a lighter note, okay?

Because I think we kind of digressed in like a little bit of, I don't know, why ho-gibs aren't good, but because they can be good too. I came across a hilarious reel the other day. It said, can guys and girls be just friends? Now, I'm curious to know your thoughts on this. What you think. Can a girl and a guy be platonically best friends and nothing more? Laurie, you and I had a discussion about this and you know my thoughts on this. What are your thoughts? Yes, I know your thoughts. I personally feel that yes, when you're a certain age and let's say you're married, you could absolutely have real friendships with guys that, for

instance, who you work with, right? But in general, no, I don't have, I've been married for what? How many years? 18 years? No, I don't have, I've been married for what, how many years, 18 years? No, I don't just have a best guy friend unless they're gay. I do have gay best friends for sure. But no, I do, I think that would be weird. But in terms of work, yes. I think because of my life and the route that I chose being in the entertainment industry and living this crazy life that I live, I don't think girls and guys can be just friends.

Now, that being said, I think girls and guys can start out as friends. I think they can maybe even go a few years. But at some point, there's going to be a situation... Okay, I'll give you an example. So I had a good friend. But at some point, there's going to be a situation. Okay, can I, I'll give you an example. So I had a good friend. I'm not going to name her name. And we were friends for years. She was the first person really that I hung out here with in LA. I met her in New York and whatever in LA. And we had a relationship for years. It was just friends. But were you attracted to her while you were friends?

I was not attracted to her while we were friends at all. She was my friend and we got along and we hung out. We had that going, but I physically wasn't attracted. Is she pretty? Absolutely, but it wasn't my type. Down the line- You were attracted to her. 100% you were attracted to her.

I wouldn't kick her out of bed. My point is, is I ended up sleeping with her. But it was years down the line. I want to say it was at least five to six years later. Did it ruin the friendship? We took a back seat on talking as much as we did. We took a back seat. You took the back seat? I much as we did. We took a backseat. You took the backseat or you definitely took the backseat? I think we both did. I mean, we were also, it was years down the line. My, you know, my friendships were changing with other people. I think too, we, I don't know. I just, I think too, and then another situation is like, I would ask her girl advice and I think it bothered

her when I asked girl for advice. So I think she would give me misinformation because she didn't want to see me with another girl even though we weren't sleeping together or hooking up. Yes, but if you started off as best friends, you already have that connection with each other and then it resulted in you guys sleeping together, that's not just a random hookup and you probably treated it like that, where you just, okay, it happened one night, whatever, and then you continued just being friends with her. But to her, it was more. You didn't acknowledge that. I didn't acknowledge that. It goes back to that old movie with Julia Roberts. Do you

remember when it was called something with friends? Friends with Benefits. No, Julia Roberts back in the day where she, her best friend getting married. Do you remember when it was called something with friends? Friends with benefits. No, no. Julia Roberts back in the day where she, her best friend getting married. Do you guys know the movie I'm talking about? It was like in the nineties. It was an old movie. It was a great movie.

My best friend's wedding. My best friend's wedding. Yes. Okay. That's exactly what like kind of what happened. He was getting married and she was like the maid of honor of his, like it was just, and she ended up falling for him after being best friends for so long. Again, this is kind of, you know,

this is nobody's right, nobody's wrong here. This is again, just my opinion. No, you were wrong because as best friends, you should have had the conversation. And that is exactly why you're doing this in the Man of the Mind podcast, because explaining, you know, from that toxic male perspective some of the mistakes that you've done in your past. But I didn't want to have that conversation because it could have ruined our friendship. Because I think in the head, I don't want to say it was fun, but the idea of it could happen was kind of fun.

It's kind of like texting somebody and meeting somebody on DM and you're kind of flirting with two people at the same time. You want to keep it there. And I felt like if I would have just shut the door. These are the games of a toxic player. Again, this is a me in my 20s though. I was 20 years old, 28, 29 years old at this time. And again, I developed these traits really early when I moved to LA.

So I'm curious to know what you guys think about this. So anyway, my answer is no. Lori's answer is yes. So agree to disagree. So OK, I saw this comedian who I really like. And he kind of springboarded really, really quick. And I think a lot of you guys know who he is. His name is Matt Reif.

And very controversial. Very controversial guy. Stunningly handsome, though. Stunningly handsome.. Stunningly handsome. I can say that. Is it actually possible, he's saying that it's actually possible for a guy and a girl to be friends. And his response was, as long as the girl is not attractive.

I think he used the term ugly. Okay. Again, this is probably why he's very controversial. You know a lot of my friends. Do I have unattractive friends? I mean, all of your friends are on television. So of course, everybody's beautiful. I think everybody's attractive. There's some people that... But see, attractive is in the beholder. I am the beholder, right? I am very, I have my own type. I know you wanna laugh at that, but I have my own,

I have my type, and what I think, what someone thinks is drop dead gorgeous, I think is, eh, you know, what I think is amazing, other guys think is whatever. Like for instance, me and Tom Schwartz have total polar opposite attractions, you know? A lot of my friends, we all have different tastes, but that's what makes life beautiful. That's what makes the world go around. If we all like the same thing, then that'd be boring.

And I have different interests. When I was born, I didn't say, well, this is what I like. This is what I want. This is just so happens what I like. And it is what it is. That's what anybody likes. You like what you like. No matter what I want. This is just so happens what I like. And I, it is what it is. That's what anybody likes. Nobody just, you like what you like, you know, no matter what your friends date or whatever, you like what you like. Okay, y'all, I want you to do something for me. Go into your bathrooms and count how many skincare products you have in there. I tried to count mine, but I have too many to count. I don't even remember what most of them do. But what if I told you that you just need five? Well, thanks to J.Lo Beauty, that is all you need for radiant glowing skin. Get that J.Lo

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I think Ashton Kutcher is the one who found him and kind of gave him the green light. If I'm making that correct, I think he's the one that got him going and kind of funded the whole thing, more or less. Do you know more pop culture things than I do? I do because I scroll and I want to say Ashton Kutcher is the one that kind of started him. And I think that they did a commercial together back in the day and I think he was doing shit on his own and he kind of just went off on his own. And it's very rare that you see a comedian who's stunningly handsome.

Most comedians are, you know, yeah, all right, but they're not stunningly handsome. I mean, maybe you can just be friends if the girl gives you the ick and we've talked about the ick many, many times. You know, in some way there's zero attraction. Now I've had girls that given me the ick and we've talked about this. Well you recorded that pod, the ick podcast with Schwartz a couple weeks ago and we were actually on the plane coming home from Toronto, the three of us. Oh my god, we have a set economy people. Oh my God. One thing I'll tell you guys about Jax,

he is the least bougie person. I will say that, like he will eat anywhere, you'll eat anything, you don't need an $80 steak. You're not like Jesse who likes to go to my friend Jesse by the way, who you guys know from the show is extremely bougie. Louis Vuitton loafers drives the Porsche lives in Beverly Hills. You're wearing Louis Vuitton loafers right now. I am. Well, there's something. Yeah. But there's things that like, but I get them. I don't

like it was, I get them as a gift. I would never spend that kind of money on myself. And what Laurie's trying to say is I am the least bougie is person in the world. You are except when it comes to flying anything but business class. The biggest tantrums Jax Taylor has is over a flight situation. I cannot, and I think I'm allowed to be bougie in this. We're all allowed to be bougie in certain things, right? Some people like to eat certain things. People like to get their coffee from certain places.

I need to sit business or first class. I cannot handle it. I can't remember the reason. Now, this, no, we got kicked off a flight is what happened. I can't remember the reason. Now, this notes we got kicked off a flight is what happens. Sometimes we got kicked off something. We got bumped. Okay, no, no. So don't say kicked off because there was that incident with you with that was my recliner, but we're not going to talk about that. No, can we explain what happened there? There was a reason why I got kicked off and it was not for me blowing a

tantrum. Okay, I got on the plane. Okay? I paid $3,500 for my ticket, okay? It was a flight from New York to LA at six in the morning. I had to go home, I had to pick up my son and take him to school and do all this stuff. Again, I paid for the seat. So when I got on the plane, the seat was broken. It was stuck in recline. I couldn't fix the seat. So therefore they were like, sir, we need you to go back and sit to economy. And I go, listen, I can't sit you want to call it, the tunnel. It already stepped back and I couldn't fix the seat and I go, I'm sorry, I'm not going

to sit in the middle on a five hour flight back to LA when I have a long day. Something definitely happened. I wasn't going to get my money back. The fact that I heard about it through press, I do believe- Thank you, Page Six. Yeah, so what? You sometimes withhold the truth a little bit. I what you're, you're, you sometimes like withhold the truth a little bit. I know the truth. The seat was broken. Yeah. What else can I

possibly say? We're probably very grumpy. I will say in Toronto, when this did happen, I was in New York. No, no, but now I'm going back to Toronto. Recently, when we were together, it was myself, Jackson Schwartz, and I don't know what happened. We were bumped. Like suddenly we got an email saying, your business class flights are no longer. There's no more room on the plane. So we're putting you in economy anyway. I think I kept my cool because you were there. That's what I think happened. Because I was there and I'm like, guys, it's really not that deep.

We're going to get home. I just don't know how they can bump you like that. We didn't get our money back. Nothing. They just said, nope, sorry, Air Canada, by the way, that's who it was, and just bumped us. I can't tell you how. I think you had a middle seat and you had a lot of anxiety about that.

I had switched with someone, the person in, yeah, and then I was in the middle. We put eye masks on. That was the worst flight experience of my life sitting in between Jacks and Tom Schwartz for six hours. There was a lot of, you know what, it ended up being a lot of fun though. It ended up being a lot of fun. We put eye masks on. We were so bougie back there. We did, and I can't handle when people talk loud, when people snore, when people take their

shoes off. Like, why? But even Brittany has told me this before and I saw it with my own eyes. You put your feet up on the armrest too. So you hate when people do it. Yes, but you do it on the back of somebody's seat. When I'm in first class, when I'm in my cubicle, yeah I can't see the feet but when you're sitting economy keep your freaking shoes on

Nobody wants to see that Brittany has has said you take your shoes I do when I'm in my cubicle my pod Brittany and I first of all for the fact we've never sat seat and we've never sat economy except for when we take our connecting flight to Lexington. Just so people do understand, anytime they're flown out for press or for an event, it's the companies and the networks that fly them, obviously. Put them in business class. I don't know, would you buy your own business class flight?

Because you're very frugal with money. First of all, I'm very frugal. And I've never once in the last 12 years of being on television, I've never once paid for my flight. Right. And that's another thing I'm not sure people know about you. You're very frugal. I'm very frugal with money. I'm very good with money. But like I know what it's like to live paycheck to paycheck. And I think it took me from living paycheck to paycheck to really realize how to manage money.

It really did because I didn't know how to manage money. I would just spend, spend, spend, spend and didn't care. And especially when I lost my job on Vanderpump, COVID happened, I lost my job, my wife was pregnant, I had a mortgage, I had car payments, I had all this. And thank God, I had a mortgage, I had car payments, I had all this and thank God I had a savings account. Yes, I had to ask for Brittany for a little bit of help here and there, but I was okay. We were okay. I wasn't being like, oh shit, what are we going to do?

I wasn't relying on my paycheck. Nicole Zichal-Benendiz-Sandoval Yeah, no, but the point was we were saying, you're not bougie like that except when it comes to flying. I literally took a video of Jack's walking past business class into economy and he looks back. We need a podium. There's nothing worse than people in first class. Just I like staring you down like as you walk past and I like I'm on a television show, right? So they're like, why is Jackson Taylor going to economy? Why is Tom Schwartz going to economy? That's what I'm thinking

in my head. They're probably not even, they probably don't even know who we are. But in my head- People are going to listen to this and think you're so gross for saying this because it really, but what they don't understand, like even at the facility, you're not staying in this beautiful, like where these A-list celebrities are staying. Dude, I drive a pickup truck. Okay? I am not bougie. You'll sleep a cot on the floor. You're really simple. Listen, every single person out there has their one thing that they need.

Every single person, whether it's their designer coffee, whether it's a certain shoe they have to wear, whether it's a certain hair product. Everyone knows you drink gas station coffee. I drink gas station coffee. I drive a pickup truck. I'm from a blue collar family. I save my money. But it's just about flying.

But what is it about the first class that you need? I need to be not around other people. Other people bother me, crinkling bags, snoring, loud people on the phone, people talking out loud, people slamming your seat. I get anxiety. But there's like nine of those people or 10 of those people in business class. I've never had an issue in business class, never. People are usually... I don't want to offend anybody, but people are just kind

of keep to themselves more or less. You know, I just, I'm sorry. Again, everybody has their one thing and I don't think I'm offending anybody. Okay. It's your one thing and he also gets these flights for free. So you're not paying for it. Yeah. And you know what?

Even Bravo and they're really good with me about this. They're like, Jack, do you want to stay in these lavish hotels? And I'm never, I'm always like, no, I like to stay in my one hotel. I like to stay at the Gans Vort in New York. I like to stay at certain places. Well, there was that one time years ago that even Brittany had said, remember you're like, Lori, I cannot stay, we cannot stay at this hotel. It was literally a bed, New York hotel.

No, I'll tell you, you want me to say the name of the hotel? No, don't say that. Okay. They are very nice, but it's not, it wasn't good for two people. It was good for one person. It was good for one person, but it was, it was not good for two. And obviously I'm staying with a woman, right? So she's got a lot more accessories and she needs to get ready and you know, just, just more things. She needs to hang up things like I'm a guy. Yeah. And especially when you're going, you're going for press, you're going for watch what happens live.

Brittany has the glam team coming in. You need space. Oh God. The room was tiny. And like I said, for me, I would have been fine, but Brittany, no, she needed her space. Any girl needs her space. But I'm the least bougie at all. I mean, I don't know if you'd look at the housewives, they need to stay at the Trump

hotel. They need everything. And we just, I think our cast is just kind of like, we're easy. We don't care. We're just happy to be together and hang out. We like to go to our lunches. And as long as I'm in the meatpacking district, I'm good. As long as I can go to catch, as long as I can go to my places.

He's not bougie, but he's naming catch, Craig. By the way, these people always say, hey, come to our restaurant. So I'm very lucky that they like me and that I love going. And I'm so blessed and honored that I get to go to these places because, like I said, I'm very frugal with my money. I would never go to these places on my own dime. Never. I'm not that kind of guy.

I drink gas station coffee, AM PM, by the way. So anyway, so like I said, I did, I did going back to the Ick. Laurie, you'll account to this. So I actually did episode with Schwartz about this, by the way, we call it about the Ick. And we were watching our show, Nobody Wants This. And that's where I learned about the Ick. I want to point out something funny. Nobody wants this every single time Jack's posts, he writes the word, he spells it K-N-O-W.

That's because they sell, that's how they spell it on the show. No, it's not. They don't? No. I've told you multiple times about this, but you continuously spell it this way. I think it's hilarious because we are going to have Aaron Foster on the podcast in the future. Yes. So excited. And Jax is friendly with her and she's actually, her husband is a huge fan. Her husband had her birthday, his birthday party at my bar, at my bar. And

they bought a cameo from you. Yeah. They're awesome. And her show is amazing and I love her and I can't wait to have her on. I'm so stoked. I have so many questions because... Yeah. So it's, it's nobody is spelled N-O-B-O-K. I know how it's spelled. Well, no, you don't know. I could have swore it was K-N-O. Maybe I was wrong. Well, I was wrong. Are you sure? Yeah.

I know people are going to say, because they know I have access to Jax's social media pages and everything, but I can't spend my entire day. You have how many clients? My team can't spend their entire days deleting and uploading and re-spelling. I mean, this is Jax. This is who he is. He owns who he is. He's not a great speller. No, and I don't care. I don't give a shit. I'm in the car most of the time doing this. I'm quick, I'm fast, and I don't edit. I get yelled at by Lori and Ryan all the time. Edit your freaking posts before you post them. Read it. I mean, how

hard is it? Read it back to yourself. And yeah, I've got in trouble for that. But anyway, getting back to my ick factors. Okay, here is Jack's Taylor's ick factors. Okay, I cannot handle when a girl has a messy car or an apartment. Cannot handle it. Again, this is with my OCD. Now, if you've seen my house, I am immaculate. It drives me crazy if the remote control is not vertical on my coffee table. It needs to be like, I can't leave my house. In fact, I was late this morning because I saw a crumb on the counter. So I think it's ironic because your place now is immaculate. But when you were staying

at the house, and Brittany and I, we joke about this actually, when you were staying at the house yourself, yes, like there, if I'd go to the bathroom, there was no toilet paper there. I mean, it was a little bit messy. By the way, Brittany maintains the house. It's pristine. I give her that. It is during Christmas. Oh, I give her that.

But I was going through such a dark, dark place because of the separation. You guys will see this. I can't really get into it that I just didn't care. And I didn't care about nothing. I was sleeping in the same clothes, sleeping on the couch. What man do you know that goes through a divorce takes it well? They go through a hole no matter what. Divorce destroys both people, but I always see the manliest men break in half when they're going through a divorce. I just do. I think divorce is the hardest thing I've ever been through. And I've been through my father's death. This is the hardest thing I've ever gone through. And I never thought in a million years we

would end up here. But again, we'll get into that later. Anyway, my second ick is cigarettes. I cannot handle if a girl smokes. That is a huge deal breaker. I think because I grew up in a household of smokers, my mother and my father were smokers, that's just the way it was in the 80s and 90s, everyone smoked. It was like a thing. They smoked in airplanes for God's sake. There was ashtrays in airplanes. I think it's really common actually that when kids grow up around it, it actually deters them. Oh my God. And I can tell you right now, I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. Never.

Wow. Never even tried? No, the smell, it just, ugh. I remember if I liked a girl or whatever, you can smell it a mile away. And I'm like, I am not kissing that ashtray mouth. I'm not. When Reality Hits is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? I know I do. Progressive makes it easy. Just drop in some details about yourself and see if you're eligible to save money when you bundle your home and your auto policies. Process only takes minutes and it could mean hundreds more in your pocket. Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you could save. Progressive casualty insurance

company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states. Hi, I'm Stacey Schroeder. On my podcast, I share candid updates from my personal life, chat with some of my best friends about what's going on in our lives, give commentary on the latest pop culture headlines, and sometimes deep dive into random topics I'm obsessed with, like human design. It's a bit all over the place, but that's how I like it. And you will too. Listen to my podcast

Stassi wherever you get your podcasts. Okay. Here's another one. This one's kind of funny. I think I made Lori laugh with this one. Platform shoes. Okay. So I know this is a thing in the early 2000s. Like when you go to Vegas and you see a girl in those BB fricking foam platform flip flops that are just dirty and white. Oh, gross. To me, it's not even the platform shoes. It's the next thing. It's the precise size of the foot that you like. And by the way, it is Brittany's size foot.

It is Brittany's size foot. That is a huge deal breaker. And I think you and I were talked about it. What is the first thing you notice when you see somebody? Am I jumping ahead here? I'm not sure. What is the first thing you notice when you see somebody? I did ask you that.

And I don't mean to be... I mean, obviously you see your face. That's a given. But where do you go from there? I am a... I'm just going to be blunt. I'm an ass and boobs guy. You know, I, You said boobs and I actually think that is not the most common answer for men.

Okay. What do they look at? I looked online and I think the answer was like they did a poll and our statistics have shown that men actually look towards the cheekbones and ridge of the face. Something strange like that that you wouldn't expect. The only problem, I love a good cheekbone. Love it. But the problem with that is usually girls in opinion, who have such great bone structure,

they don't have the body type that I'm attracted to. Does that make sense? They're a little bit more on the thin side than I like. Because their face is so thin, that means usually their body is very thin. That's just not what I'm attracted to. I need, I like voluptuous, curvy women. That's just my taste. Nothing against anything else, but that's what I like voluptuous, curvy women. That's just my taste, nothing against anything else,

but that's what I like. And usually women that are like that, you know, have a little bit more, I think just fat in their face. Is that safe to say? They just have a little bit more, yeah. And okay, so here's the next one that kind of, threw Lori for a loop.

You have to have a good, you have to have good feet. They cannot be larger and I'm taking seven and a half. Seven and a half is my go to. You have to have a good arch, they have to be tan, and they have to have white nail polish. Not have to, but I would prefer a white nail polish or no nail polish at all. White or no nail polish at all. Manicured, tan, good arch, seven and a half, that's the biggest they can be. What are your thoughts on that? Is that disgusting? I mean, no, it's not disgusting.

It's just, it's shocking. You're a breed of your own. You know exactly what you want, very, very specific. It's very clear I love feet. I didn't say when I signed up when I was born, I didn't sign up to say, Hey, what there wasn't a list of like, okay, what are your future fetishes? I didn't sign up for this. That's just what I like. People like weird shit. That's why there's such a, a plethora of different things on porn websites. If you ever go on a porn website, there's a million different fetishes. Great. I'm not into 90% of them, but somebody else is. And again, that's the way of the world and that's what we like. So just to get into that, those are my three things. I mean, there's more, but those are my top three. I'm curious to know what the women look to in guys as the first thing.

I think what I see, not just guys in general, but people in general, I look at their mouth, their teeth. Yeah. You're not the first person that I've heard other girls say the same thing. Teeth are an important thing. When I'm speaking with you now, I actually, I may look like I'm looking you in the eye, but I'm not. I look at your mouth.

And I have veneers. So, my teeth are perfect. You know what? Everybody, you know what, this is at least another thing. Everyone always says, Jack's, you're so full of yourself. I tell you that every day. Right? You know what? Who the fuck am I supposed to be full of if I'm not full of myself? Here we go. Of course. What did I tell you? Of course I'm full of myself. Who else am I supposed to be full of? Who else should I? Yeah, come on. Okay, girls, I was watching a video the other day and someone had great advice on how to get over a guy.

They said the trick is to give yourself the ick about them. Again, please watch, nobody wants this. Think of the most revolting things about him. Even if you have to make up scenarios in your head. Picture them doing something absolutely disgusting like picking his nose or just picking his nose or scratching his ass or just something gross about guys. Let's be honest, guys do a lot of disgusting things. I'm guilty of it, but I just do it privately. I thought that was really, really funny. And the ick is a new term.

It's a real thing. I've seen people do disgusting things. I've been on dates where I thought, okay, this is going well, and then they just did something bizarre and I'm like, time to go. There was no term for it. Normally people are on their best behavior in the first few dates. Yes, 98% of the time they are, but you're going to go on a date where someone throws you for a loop. Again, when I did this, there was no ick that wasn't around that word. So it was called...

For you, your icks are very superficial though. That was the difference between you and Schwartz for Schwartz. It was more You know their communication style Bullshit Okay, maybe Tom is like yes like that, but you listen he's very picky when it comes to girls He has a certain type. He likes pretty girls, but he has a type So, you know what? I think a huge dick is for women? What?

Like the biggest across the board. And I think a lot of women aren't going to agree with me right now. I know TikTok does men that go to the gym and take mirror selfies of their muscles. Guilty. Yep. Guilty, guilty because you want to know why? I don't know why. You know what?

The reason I do it is because especially lately I've been working my ass off in the gym and I just want to show it. I guess it's kind of the same thing as girls showing bikini pictures, right? Is that the same? I guess, but I mean- I'm just proud of myself for working so hard in the gym. I spend two hours a day, seven days a week in the gym and I want to see progress. So, I mean, yeah, but we find it icky. I know. And I don't

know why I'm looking for other people's validation, you know, I just want to, you know, I've been working in the gym, somebody, God damn it, tell me that I'm looking good. Like God, Jacks put on size or whatever. It makes me feel good. And I'm not looking for it from women, to be honest. I'm looking at it from, from men like, man, Jacks, you're Jacked. What are you doing? I get off on that. I get off on that. I just, I really, really like it. Well, guys, thank you so much for tuning into In the Mind of a Man. These are just some of the things that keep me up at night to be honest. And what I want to know your thoughts, where are we all headed? Is social media the downfall of our existence? Our monogamous relationship is going to be the extinct 30 to 40 years from now. DM us at In the Mind of a Man. We will be taking

one caller live per episode where we'll be decoding your situation. So message me, tell me your situation. Let's talk it through and get to the bottom of it. Thanks guys. As always, it was fun and looking forward to the next one. Pluto TV is the place for movie fans like me. And TV fans like me. They've got something for everyone, and it's totally free. You can binge laugh out loud sitcoms like Frasier. And rewatch cult classics like Higher Learning. Whether you're in the mood to solve a little crime before bedtime with NCIS or Tracker.

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