Whiskey Ginger with Andrew Santino - Eddie Pepitone

Episode Date: August 22, 2025

Comedy legend and “Bitter Buddha” Eddie Pepitone sits down with Andrew Santino to rant, riff, and actually make you feel better about the end of the world. We get into panic vs. peace, late-stage everything, why screaming can be therapeutic, and how Eddie forged his new hour THE COLLAPSE. Watch the special now on Veeps: https://veeps.com/eddiepepitone Eddie’s newest hour THE COLLAPSE (exec-produced by Patton Oswalt and directed by Steven Feinartz) is a full-throttle romp through modern anxiety, self-ownage, and tiny moments of joy. If you love raw, soulful, end-times comedy, don’t miss it. Then come back here and tell us your favorite bit. 🍊 🔥 Subscribe for new Whiskey Ginger episodes every Friday 🎧 Full audio on Spotify, Apple & all podcast platforms 👕 Merch & tour: andrewsantino.com FOLLOW EDDIE: Instagram: @eddiepep FOLLOW SANTINO: Instagram: @cheetosantino TikTok: @cheetosantino #WhiskeyGinger #EddiePepitone #TheCollapse #AndrewSantino #ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy ====================================================== Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS MONARCH GET 50% OFF YOUR FIRST YEARWITH PROMO CODE: WHISKEY https://monarchmoney.comSQUARESPACE GET 10% OFF YOUR ORDER https://squarespace.com/whiskey ROCKET RX GET 30% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDERWITH PROMO CODE: WHISKEY30 https://rocketrx.com FACTOR GET 50% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDER https://factormeals.com/whiskey50off ======================================= Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast https://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria https://www.instagram.com/itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What up, Whiskey, Jeter fans. Welcome back to the show. It's your first time joining the show. Welcome to the show. I'm doing a couple of dates. So come check me out. Andrewsantino.com. I'm going to San Francisco. I'm going to Tempe, Arizona. I'll be playing Hammond, Indiana, Indiana, a casino down there doing a bunch of other casinos. I'm going back to Borgata and Atlantic City. Come see me. Go to Andrewsantino.com for those tickets. Andrew Santino.com. In here, we pour whiskey, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk. You were that creature in the ginger beard Sturdy and ginger Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse Ginges are fugitive You owe me $5 for the whiskey

You're $75 for the horse Ginger's all hell no This whiskey is excellent Ginger I like gingers Ladies and gentlemen Welcome back to Whiskey Ginger My guest today is one of my favorite people

On Earth I say that for all my guess But I mean once again today It is Eddie Pepiton Hello sir How good was that? It's great to be here and the Whiskey Ginger hideout. This is the hideout. This is a little, it feels a little like a, it feels like I built a fort as an adult,

like a kid's fort of pillows and blankets and stuff. That's the best. That's the best. I believe Rock Hudson carried on affairs here. You ever hear that Hollywood bullshit? Like, I went up to some party and the woman who owns the place goes, you know, Rock Hudson used to have his affairs in these bungalows. And you have no way, you have no way of knowing whether.

that's true enough. But you just want to believe it if it seems like it's probable. My first landlord, I'll never forget, I hated, hated. He would do this all the time. He'd go, you know, in that apartment that you guys were living in back there? I was like, yeah, he's like, you know who used to live down there? I was like, who? He goes, Sean Hayes. He used to rub this in my face. He used to go, so I know you guys are like actors or whatever, you're little like goofy comic actors? Sean Hayes lived there. Legend, Sean Hayes. Sean Hayes. Sean Hayes. That's what you say. He goes, Sean Hayes, you should live there. Remember that guy's, when you're doing your sketches, because we would film, you know, Sean Hayes. Who the fuck is Sean Hayes? Sean Hayes, the guy, is that, am I saying the name wrong?

Yeah, from Will & Grace. No, from Will & Grace. Sean Hayes, the actor Sean Hayes. You know, I did an episode of Will and Grace. He was a sweetheart. And you don't even remember Sean Hayes. Well, I forgot his name, but I did ask him about the Rock Hudson thing because, you know, you know about Hayes. And he didn't have any. yeah you're handsome guy very handsome and he was successful he's the most successful person to come out of that apartment and he didn't know he didn't know anything about this was is this your first apartment first apartment in with uh first apartment in hollywood where first but it was in west hollywood obviously west hollywood it was on um laurel no it was laurel it was on laurel right down the street from the laugh factory no no south of santa oh okay by laurel elementary school we were right

around the corner from there. And a bunch of famous people used to live in that neighborhood back then. Like, Seth Rogan used to live over there. I remember we'd see him walking his dog. And I'd be like, wow, dude, Seth lives right there. And we're living four to a room. Four guys. And two of my friends live subterranean. Half of the apartment was underground

and it flooded twice a year, just about. Really? Yeah, a poo pipe would break, a city poo pipe would break. And there would be, I'm not kidding. Poo water all over the place. Oh, shit. Yeah, but we got paid. Every time it happened, we claimed. It was nice. You claimed? Yeah, you can claim with the city of like damages wow you're somebody who doesn't mind going through the red tape i'm one of

these people i get these class action lawsuits mail to me all the time because my dad has been breached and says you know all you have to do is fill out this form and i'm out you're out you don't want to do it i don't want to do it for 13 dollars and 86 cents it's a fuck well it's fun it's fun you're right and i want to make those fucks pay yes you know they screwed people over oh absolutely get the money from those guys. Absolutely, but I just can't sit at a computer and, you know. It's a waste. I get it. It's a waste of my time. It's a waste of my energy. But I do think if somebody went through the process to sue the city, I want to support the lawsuit. I agree. But here's what I should. You know what I usually do? I don't get the checks. If I do fill out the form, you know, you can say donate it to whatever.

So I'll just donate it. Right. Unless I see that it's over $20. You have to over $20? I get it. I want a latte? I'm going at Canters. Is that still there that place? You remember when this city was rich with Jewish delis and now like they're all gone? All the good ones are gone. Greenblats is gone. Gone. Greenblatz is gone. Juniors is gone. Canters is still there. Canners is there but she's holding on. She's got one pinky. Is that right? Is that right? It's just not the same. When we, when I moved to L.A., and I would hear that, you know, everyone's a call. What year did you move? I moved here in 2006. Six.

Oh, I beat you here. Yeah, you beat me. I was living in the New York City, I'm from New York, and the Twin Towers came down. That was you? I'll tell you, my first thought, and I knew I had to be in Hollywood, my first thought, when I saw that first plane hit the first tower, I said, this is going to be a great vehicle for Nick Cage.

And so I knew I had a move. You had to. You got to. Hollywood was calling. Pick up the phone, Eddie Pepper. tone a plane has just hit tower by the way i have no capacity to take in tragedy i know i mean that was such a huge tragedy it was unbelievable it was so bad you didn't think it was real that's correct like the amount of people that go it's a movie right am i watching by the way you always

hear that now people saying that like in any big tragedy it's like i felt like i was in a movie i felt like no you're actually in real life you know these people they don't nobody knows what reality You know what I saw last night is Eddington. Did you see that yet? No, what is that? It's a new Ari Aster movie. Oh, Ari's movie. Oh.

You know Ari? He lived here for a long time in this bunker with Rock Hudson. No, Ari Aster movie, I do want to see that. He's pretty, he's interesting to say the least. And Yaquine is always, just anything that he does. Powerful. It's intense. Yeah, he's good.

I wonder what it's like to just have a cup of calls. coffee with him. Do you think it's it's still intense? I would think so. Yeah. Like he like he he probably put you in a little bit of a of a spin cycle because I, because I've been with guys like that and I'm nervous the whole time. Because I'm like, I don't know what to say to you. I told him the story of the time I got to work with, isn't this crazy that this just happened with Christopher Guest? Yeah. Christopher Guest, you got to work with Christopher. Well, but I got to interview with him first and I was so nervous the whole time. And he, he just asked me about the coffee I was drinking.

That's all he wanted to talk about. He didn't want to talk about the role. I heard he's a prick. Really? That's what I heard. He was quick with me and easy. It was just he wanted to sit with me to see if I had any chops that he was interested in. And I was like, whatever.

It was an interview for a job, possibly? Yeah, but not for, but I did, he didn't want, so he didn't want me to read the character or read lines or anything. He was like, what are you drinking? And I said, coffee and he said, tell me, or tea, it was tea. He said, tell me about tea. And so I just, you know, I feel like saying. Fuck you to that. Say it right now. Say it. Say it right now. No, I mean, when a big guy, you know, gets you and he's like, yeah, just tell me about tea. And you know that he wants to see something interesting. He wants to see a play or something. So you're like, well, Camamel tea, my friends, their new age, they say, Eddie, I can't sleep. I'm an insomnia. They say, Eddie, try to drink sleepy time tea. And I'm like, is sleepy time tea going to make up for the fact that I was molested?

And then you wake up, then you wake up. Then you wait for his reaction, and they're always dead pain. They're dead, they're dead, man. Yeah, but they go, you got the job. But he goes, just don't bring the molestation to the taping. Leave that at home. But bring that same kind of, I know, you're right. He put me in a place where I'm already vulnerable and nervous and scared because I'm like, I want the job so bad.

He's Christopher Gass. And I need the work. And I was like, please, I want a job so bad. How long ago was that? You don't need it. No, it was. Now you're, now you. how long ago?

No, no, I need the jobs now. I need, what, wouldn't it, I shot that? No, he doesn't. No, I do need it. I probably, it was probably seven or eight years ago, something like that, I shot that. You know who was with, in that scene with me? Matthew Bronger, Matt Bronger. You know Matt Bronger.

I sure do. Yeah, Matt, what, do you hate him? No. You said it, there was a pause. No, I love Matt. No, yeah, Matt and I did the scene together, and I asked him, I said, did you have to do one of these weird interviews? He goes, what are you talking about?

And I was like, either you're fucking with me, or he was, just did it to me. Or it's like he was having a day where he's like, I'm going to fuck with this little red at an idiot. I did.

What was it? It was, so we did a, it was actually very funny. It was, um, in the, in the television show, the main character goes to appease

one of his lady friends, uh, who's into reenactments. And so he goes and does a civil war reenactment. But he doesn't want to take it serious. But we're all taking it obviously as serious as those Yahoo's really do, do that. Right, right.

And we do a death scene where we've captured his, girlfriend and he shoots and kills us and all all guest asked was over be over overly dramatic in your death so the death is it's like a four minute death it's the dumb it's like so stupid what was this part of is this new it was it was a tv show on hbo called family tree it ran for like a couple maybe two seasons or something i don't know there's so many fucking shows out there too many too many that that i haven't even and the only one that you watch is love island you've told that to me. That's the only thing you like. Do you know it came down between me and Nikki Glazer to be the host of F-boy Island? I got to tell you, it's because you guys are so parallel, both comedically, both

physically? The physical, I think. Is closer than comedic, you think? I think so. I mean, I put on weight lately. Not much. Well, compared to her. Yeah, I guess that's true. But anyway, they didn't, they gave her F-boy Island last second, and they gave me something that didn't last at all. It was called, it was called Fuck Me Island. Oh, fuck me island. Fuck boy, it was fuck me. And it was just me walking around a deserted island. It was way out near Malta.

Yeah. And I would just walk around going, fuck me. And nobody was interested in. Why? I don't know. It didn't have legs, they said. Yeah, I feel like that's a hit. Just following you around a deserted island for a whole season, 10 episodes.

Next on Fuck Me Island. And he scratches his head. Just you under a coconut drink But those things deserve parody Has FBoy Island I just can't believe that there are shows about people Just hooking up

Trying to have sex But it's so stupid That's the core of reality television That's the core It's like how can we get these people To have sex You're like no there's a competition show About strength and endurance

They're like no no It's about them having sex I don't know man It's stupid It's dark Well how about we Instead of doing Survivor Let's do our spin on Survivor

What could be a new version of the spin-off of Survivor? Well, first of all, I haven't seen that show in a long time. Is that, give me the premise again? The premise of Survivor? I know. Okay, so you have to do alliances and that kind of shit? It's a bunch of agents and managers.

It's U-T-A-C-A and William Morris are on, they're on an island with you. See, this is pretty good. And you have to fistfight to see which lawyer and manager will take you, but you have to form alliances with certain managers and lawyers. Oh, man. And here's the trick. they fly in halfway through the season, business managers. And now they're really shaking up the mix, you know?

A production assistant will come in who hopefully will align, you know, align with you. Man, you're very, you know the business. I'm a biz guy. I'm hands. I'm like with the forms for the class action suits. I don't want to know. Yeah. You guys please leave me alone.

Leave me alone. Leave me alone. Well, I've done this. I did this recently. I have no lawyer, no manager. I don't even think I have an agent. really much anymore. Well, that's everybody.

I'm flying free. It's kind of great. Is that right? A little bit. I just feel like I didn't really need a lot of stuff anymore. I was like, I guess we're making so much of our own content. Oh, yes. I mean, like, I need someone to help me book stand updates. But outside of that, I was like, I don't even think these guys

want to try to get me work anymore. So I'm just going to make my own nonsense. I don't get that. I don't. I think that's the biz, man. That's the They don't want to get you work, but that's how they make their money, don't they? I think they make their money on deals on deals on deals guys that's true that's true they're big deal you're a big deal's guy you made deals for years you've been wheeling a dealin since i met you you're always

well i had a suit back then and and it got burned in the la fire so i cannot make a deal well i got burned the l a fire because you were saving families people don't know eddie was running into homes saving families yes and the suit caught on fire yes i i hear a very high-pitched whistle and uh look at this what what happened huh what happened i just had a stress test i'm at the age where um like you know i'm still super into comedy and i'm really i'm an old guy but i don't feel like an old guy so i'm super in a comedy but you know they're like look you got to get a test on your heart well your heart's got to be fine you take care of yourself it was i see your gym videos you do

You post gym videos. I do. And I've got to tell you, because I'm overweight and people see that, I inspire a lot of fat people. You do. But if you start to get too skinny, what's going to happen? They turn on you. They turn on me, and they'll be like, oh, the hot guy. But right now, it's like, wow, this is something that I could do.

And people actually are always like, go get a meddy. I'm actually thinner than I was when I first went to the gym years ago. I was the type of guy where other guys at the gym would come up to me and pat me on the back and go it ain't easy, is it? I think you look good, by the way.

I didn't compliment you, but you do look really good. You look like you've gotten in really good shape. I've gotten in okay shape, but I did pass that stress test. Now, what is the level of what's pass and fail?

I don't know. Yeah, but who cares? If you got the pee, you're fine. I read it today. You know what's hilarious now? I don't know if you get this, but doctors, I'm with UCLA Health

whatever, through SAG, and doctors put on your portal. Have you, have you, like, my UCLA health, I'm on it. Yes. I'm on it. So, so I have a stress test, which is big. Yeah. And they put on the portal the results. Yep.

With no doctor talking to you beforehand. So you're reading these things going, left ventricle is not showing any signs of ischemia. Do I want a shemia? Do I want it? Does this have anything to do with? F. Boy Island? What the fuck is going on? Is this why I lost

to get your messaging your doctor? Did I lose F. Boy Island gig because of my lack of ischemia? I do hate that so much. It scares me because I got a test done because I'm on statins. I'm a stat dog. I'm a stat daddy. How many milligrams? I think I'm on 10 now. Me too. Yeah, I think I'm on a tenor.

And I told a joke, I do a whole bit about my, because my father, I said, I said, I was telling my doctor, I was like, I'm in, I'm doing the best I have been, you in years and, like, working out, not eating late anymore. I'm trying to stay in check. And my doctor was like, yeah, but you should be on a statin?

And I was like, why? He's like, probably your father. But I called my dad. Genetic stuff? Yeah, I called my dad. And I was like, are you on this? I didn't know. He's like, yeah, dude, we've all been on.

Everyone in your family has been on this for 30 years. You had no idea. No clue. Well, because it's like, I, they hide it. The family hides stats. Well, we're Irish. Shh. Don't say it, you know?

By the way, did I learn exactly. that about the Irish when I was in Ireland for a festival and I said out loud to the crowd, which I cannot believe I did in retrospect. I said out loud to the crowd. Round of applause if you're in therapy. Oh, and don't do that. That's a day, yeah. It was dead silent and I talked to an Irish comic after he goes, mate, we don't do that. They don't do that. Saying are you on, saying the word therapy in Ireland is like the N word to them. You do not, you do not, that's, that's a no-no. my friend. Yes.

With Irish people, it's, we'll figure it out when I'm dead. That's what it's always been. My grandfather notoriously hated doctors, and that was always a bit for us, that he never went to a doctor. He was a firefighter for the city of Chicago who smoked his entire life. And then finally, he was like, man, I'm having crazy pains. I guess I'll finally go to the doctor now. And the doctor's like, you're going to die pretty soon.

But the truth was, if you don't know, you don't know. He lived blissfully until they were like, will die in about a month. And he was like, great. I'll see you later. Why find out? I understand that. It's like, why am I reading this portal? Why do I want to know about ischemia? I don't care. I don't need to know about it. It's going to get me when it gets me. Ashemia sounds like a terrific sushi. It is really good. What is that? Is that Noki Woki has ischemia right here on Ventura? Very good. A little, little ischemia with brushed, with a little bit of brushed soy on there. And you're not

allowed to put sauce on the ones that they pre-sauce. You know that. If they put the Ashimi on, you have to eat it as it is. As is. Yeah, you're not allowed to... Yeah, there's a lot of abuse in sushi restaurants. Oh, yeah, there are. These days, like, did I see you eat the sauce, they say? Yeah, did you eat the sauce? Did you dip it when it was pre-sauce?

And I'm like, take it easy, pal. And they're like, listen. And they're like, arragato. Arrogato. Please remove yourself from our restaurant. Please get out of here right now. Hold on. Before we get too far, I want all of the people to know I've loved you for a very long time I've always admired you as a comedian

as an actor as a and you used to be a model when you were young you will get back to it you're a male model in New York Calvin Klein was the first campaign you did yes I don't know if you remember that you've got the look I want to know better yeah that was yours

that was me right and you were you were usurped by Mark Wahlberg who unfortunately kind of slid in your spot yeah and I let myself go a little and I became, I went way down the list as far as models. I became like, all of a sudden I'm like modeling for J.C. Penny in the lawnmower section. That's okay. I know, but it's not as hot. It's like, there's a lawnmower, that kind of thing.

But look, everyone needs lawnmower. So you are servicing America. That is true. But you are a lovely, hilarious person that I've always been a huge fan of. And for those at home, please do yourself a favor and watch Eddie Special that's on Veebs right now. If you don't watch it, he will have to go back, of course, to modeling lawn mowers. So please, it would mean a lot to us. You look at those models, and thank you, Andrew, for that. And yes, it's on vips.com slash herding.

Pepitone, you can watch the special for $12. Pretty reasonable price. I think so. It's called the collapse, by the way, because it's about my collapse and society's collapse, like how I mirror the collapse of society. You follow the trend of the collapse. It's going down, so are you. That's right.

That's kind of the goal, I guess, right? Why try to be different? Just go with it. It's like your Irish ancestors. Why are we going to the doctor at this point? What for? Because most doctor's offices because of climate breakdown are flooded. Like if you ever go to the doctor now, it's like you're in water.

You're in water now. They're like trying to show you x-rays and you're like, I can't see it because of the water. order. What's your, go ahead. Give me your collapse thought about climate, about the climate. The world getting, the world getting,

I think that, I've been trying to develop a bit about this, but I think hurricanes are going to be pretty soon. Instead of category five, it's just going to be weather people are going to be like, this is a category, fuck me. Fuck me.

This thing is so big. By the way, I have a sick thing where, Maybe because I never lived in a hurricane zone, but I have a sick thing where I like it when they're big. Oh, yeah, well, because you want the destruction, don't you? What is that about, dude? Well, I always thought I was a good person. No, no, you are, but it's cool to see.

It's kind of beautiful to watch. It's like when they get big and I order in exactly at landfall and I don't care what time it is, like 3 a.m. if it makes land. I know what it's going to make landfall because they're so good. at predicting. And I'm like, baby, let's order in. Let's order in. Let's sit in for tonight, light a couple candles, and watch the world go down. In here, we pour whiskey. Hey, there's a huge lack of awareness of most people's finances. It is very hard to keep it all together, particularly because life throws a lot of different stuff at you.

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Fires and earthquakes Which are kind of past say now Well which one Earthquakes are like big deal Big deal Earthquakes are past hey Fires are making a comeback Fires or all

That's what we're about now That's our thing What's all the rage Were you here in January Of last year When this shit was going down Yeah It felt like where do you live

Ish I live in the valley here Oh, me too. I'm trapped in the valley, which tends to be, I can't get, I can't leave it. I don't know. I don't want to leave it. I don't like the heat. No, I don't like it, but I feel like what am I going to do?

I'm not going over the hill anymore. Yeah, the hill, after you're in the valley for a while, you're like, okay, it's cooler over the hill, but it's too crowded or so. Too many humans live over there. And also, I don't, I like, if I'm being genuine. Yeah. I like the piece of the valley. I like when I go deep in the valley, it feels like. And Sino?

Yeah, oh, God, it feels like it's, it's its own, it's lived in a little bit of a time machine. It's stuck in the past. But I like that it's easy and calm and slow and nobody's really up to nothing, anything. They're just kind of moving through life. Right. It's easy.

Over the hill, chaos, panic. It seems like it. They're trying. Everyone wants, ah, ha, ha, ha, ha. Up here, it's like, I don't, I'm going to get a lawnmower from that Eddie Pepitone ad I saw. That's what most people are doing. I live, I live, um,

like Tunga and Riverside-ish. Lovely. And we'll put Eddie's address right here. People stop on by. And the other day, and I just feed birds now, like I'm at that stage of life. You do love birds. I love birds.

Are there any birds you won't feed? There's a couple, you know, a couple of crows that are paying the ass. But, no, I'll feed these birds of gold finches, which this is a goldfinch hat, if I think I'm wearing the right hat. You are. And I'll just feed them.

So I was out there feeding. the birds and as I'm out there feeding the birds four cop cars just converged on this homeless guy they slant they put him down what you know and it was this big fight and I realized it was

because I had just gotten a new couch and put out the old couch and it tracks a lot of homeless guys yeah new couch is a new couch to them so you're old is new to them my friend And it's still in good condition, knowing you, you take care of that couch. You take care of that couch. Look, I don't want to brag about how I take care of a couch, even though a couple of my cats urinated on the couch, you know.

But they're old, that one of them is just muttering to themselves at this point. One of my cats is just like, fucking pettone. Veeps. Oh, your cats are condescending in your home. Well, cats are a bit arrogant. right i do like a little bit well that's cats no we have dog but i i will say the reason i do admire cats is is because of their um level of disinterest in you it's pretty remarkable yeah i do think it's a good baron you know what it is having a cat is the same thing as when somebody gets

success in any industry at all and it goes to their head they don't have any cats around them meaning human like humans to go hey man your shit isn't that good and a cat is going a cat is basically a real friend that you grow up with that goes eddie that last thing you did was awful. And a dog, a dog isn't agent or a manager. They're going, oh my God. Oh, my God. It's a hit. Oh, my God. Who couldn't like this? My dog, man. I am so, I'm, I think, too close with my dog. What's your dog's name? Charlotte. What a lovely name. And what kind of dog have we talked? Can I guess? Let me guess. Is it a terrier? Yes, it is. Really good. And I didn't even say the full

breed. No, no. It could have been so many other things. It could have been a lot of things. But it is a terrier, and I've had her for 13 years, and I'm just like, I actually talk to her more intimately than I should. I'm sort of like, Charlotte, you don't think I have diabetes, do you? Dr. Ben Bassett thinks I do, but you don't, and she's like, oh, don't worry, you don't have it. You know what I mean? She probably does have a better gauge if you have diabetes. You know, they say dogs are instinctual. They can tell.

Do you ever hear about the dogs who know when someone's going to die in a hospital? Oh, yeah. Yeah, they, like, put their paw on them. They know. Yes, they, like, single them. It's almost like the executioner. Kill. Kill the switch on bed number 50.

Dogs do have instinct about death. They know when you're going to, they smell death. They smell cancer. Yep. They smell. Desperation. Well, yes. They're very good at that.

They smell desperation. Do your cats give you any words of wisdom? I have one cat, and I have, we had five. Me and my wife had five at one point. Now you're down to one? You didn't want to restack? We're down to one. There was a mass suicide.

It was like a Jim Jones type thing where we had no idea that they got a hold of arsenic from someplace. Yeah. It's on the street everywhere these days. Yeah. But they did a mass suicide, the cats, and they all, what did it say? It said, I can't take the fact that you only clean the litter box once every couple of days. They put up their own fight. And you know what?

The dog says nothing. The dog doesn't care. It doesn't matter. Like you said, the dog is like a toady. You know, it's like a, you know, it's like, yeah, boss, yeah, boss. Whatever you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, go jerk off. It's fucking middle of the day, of course. You got an, you got a window.

Right. She's, she's at the supermarket. Go, go, go, go, go, go down. I'll sit at the door, and if she comes home, I'll bark. You'll hear me. So go jerk off, and I'll yell. That's a signal. I'll yell.

Go it right on the couch. Yeah, right there. On the couch that you gave way to the homeless guy? That one. Go jerk off on that, and I'll scream as loud as I can. Does your dog ruin furniture, too, or just the cat? No. I had one problem cat.

Yeah. And I loved her so much. But after a while, man, it was like, whoa. Ruining everything. It was ruining. For some reason, it was the couch. It was the couch. It loved to ruin the couch.

Is that a signal, do you think to you? Was that a sign? Was the cat saying something? Well, she saw the Veep special, and she certainly wasn't enamored by it. Fist all over the couch? A little bit. No, was it a signal to me?

I don't know what the fuck. She always was a little disturbed. She always had a little, you know, something. She must have been a pepotone. She was a pepotone. She was a pettoe. I feel like cats, because of their genealiener, history are very aware. They're very intelligent and they're aware that they used to be bigger and

they're mad that they're not big anymore. Because in their mind, you can hear them saying like, you know, we used to kill you, we used to eat you guys. We would eat you guys a lot. And there's still or some of my brethren who do still eat you. Yeah, that's right. And they will. And by the way, when I grow in my second life, I'm going to eat you as well. I'll be looking for you on one of those safari tours. And I'm sure you'll be one of the idiots with your window rolled down. Whenever I see that, they're like, feed the lion. You're like, yeah, feed the lion. That's always worked out, beneficial.

Lion! Whenever I see a video online if someone getting attacked by a big wild animal, but they're in the animal's home. Ian Edwards had a great joke about that, about people that get shark attacks, that he's like, you're in his house. You're like shocked? He's like, if somebody walked into my house, I'd be like, do you know this guy? Yeah.

Then let's murder him immediately. That's another thing. I think in general I root for nature, whether it's a hurricane or, when I hear of an animal killing humans. It's like, yeah, you're in, you know. But one thing that really pisses me off, dude, is people are like,

oh, fucking coyote is here. And they're all, like, scared of the coyote. And I'm like, it's because we keep building houses where these motherfuckers used to live. Right. Right. So now they're coming down into the burbs and bears, too.

There's no more fucking food for them because we keep fucking, and they come down into the, you know, you see those videos where a bear is in a store. Have you seen that shit? Yeah, because they're like, look, you know what you did to my house? Because we want, because Charlize Theron wants another mansion, and so the bear is going to go, okay, well, I'm going to come rip apart the town then. Because you built, you built on my property, and I'm going to come, I'm going to start some shit. The coyotes, by the way, when a coyote eats a cat or a dog locally. That's what they do. It's sad,

but it's also like fair game. We're in their house, man. I root for you know what, that's what it really is. When you asked why you like the hurricane, I think it's because we root for nature. We deserve the wrath. We fucked it up. What are you going to be shocked? We did all this shit. We fucked it up. I hope animals bond together.

And this is a message to all my animal fans out there, because I do have marsupials have been starting to get the viewership on this show a lot. We're getting a lot of marsupial. I want you guys to really ruin us I think the attack All these movies are about zombie attacks I wish there was an animal attack

You know what? Maybe we should write it That's a great way or give it to a kid to write He's 25 he'll do it Are you 25? Oh you've got the energy 26 now he just turned 26 I forgot You're getting up there then yeah he's getting a little 25 is the turning point It's like ah

He can no longer write Yeah he's preoccupied What the fuck is going on back here? Right it all it starts to hurt Right by the way It just reminded me I went to a wedding and the day before the wedding was

let's get to know each other and they had a roller skating party and it was for my sister's stepson in New York and they're all doctors it was two doctors marrying each other I thought it would be a good idea to try to skate

because I I used to rollerblade around New York I'm a big hockey guy. I love hockey. I used to roll-blade, play hockey a little bit. And I thought roller skates, this will be fine. But I knew it. I put them on and they felt shady, like they were a little shaky.

It didn't seem like they really gripped my ankle, but I was like, fuck it. I took no more than two steps. And I went like this backwards. You know, like my feet just went out front of me. Nothing to grab onto. I had no helmet or anything If I would have hit my head Probably dead

Or just a vegetable You know I'd probably be a prop on F Boy Island Whatever it is Whatever show Been on the pepotone on the way out For good luck I rub the pepotone

But I landed This happened at the end of May I landed squarely on my back Like Boom Like I thought I had broken

everything but I was surrounded by doctors and they were ER doctors oh you're good so no worries whatsoever I just lean back and go do what you have to and you know what they did they just kept asking me the same question did you hit your head and I was like no it got to the point where I started getting angry I said no no they're like all right don't don't get mad because sometimes people forget but you didn't forget you would have known if you hit your head yeah I was fucked up for about six weeks no more roller skating part for you. No more roller skating. We were also at a very memorable wedding recently, and we have photos of this somewhere we can show that you were at Jeff Bezos's wedding. Yes, that's right. You were

one of the best, one of the star guests, I guess. Yeah, I did, I did a little, I've been very critical of the billionaire, so Bezos is a guy who likes a roast. Yeah. And I was like, Hey, Jeff, great to see you. And boy, there's a lot of Botox here. But anyway, Jeff, so you have robotic dogs now that chase around your employees in warehouses what the fuck how can you turn our closest

animal friend against us robotic dogs you don't let your worker and he loved it he loved it crushed he loved it the people of Venice though were protesting because that's a city I don't know if you know this that is

going underwater and they're saying it's going underwater soon that with the canals and everything it's the canals are rising they're rising bad well i just saw they flooded not too long ago we saw video of it did you yeah and you know what you guys are on top of it well i was a part of the flooding we turned on some of the i'm not gonna lie we turned on a couple of those pipes because i figured teach him a lesson you know but what did you get jeff and his wife again for a gift i remember i remember you said it was a pretty big gift yeah i feel like you're christopher guest now like what did you like imagine if you're having tea with guest in some shit diner over

here and he's like what did you get for Jeff Bezos as a gift and you're like fuck I have to tell him I didn't no I just got I figured the guys got fucking everything yeah but I thought it would be funny to send them something on Amazon to this

address and it was just a rechargeable like little speaker Bluetooth speaker well you gotta have those you don't have any of those we need more of those I'm saying that to friends and family please give me more rechargeable speakers I don't have I don't have enough. I need them. I need more. By the way, the fucking thing with Amazon is that I love electronics.

Me too. You do. You guys do. And I fucking order them. And like I do have these rechargeable Bluetooth speakers. I have like seven in my house. Never. Why would I use them? Oh, man, I'll take it outside and I'll be in the phone. Yes. Never going to use it. I'll put it on top of my car when I stop to overlook Mulholland. Never. I'll never. It's, they are, they are, rechargeable speakers will find out in a hundred years that they made 30 billion, you know? And we're never used. And they were never used. Yeah. They were like, the use time was about an hour and a half on average. And after that, they were never used ever again. Brilliant. And they use, the minerals used to make them are like killing people all over the globe. Yet we never like, you know. And those kids who are going into mines in these third world countries are like, You mean they never, I don't know what accent is. But just, yeah, I like, I followed. You mean you never, they never used these things we make. Keep digging.

That's all they would say. Keep digging. Yeah, mining for lithium and all that good stuff. When you see those videos, it is soul crunching. It's like, well, this was bad. You watch a lot of videos. I stay away from like the hardcore, you know, videos. What's a late-night video?

video session for you then what are you watching on the internet rock concerts that's good i mean like i i'm an old guy and i still watch the same shit like the last waltz i can't get enough of the last waltz you know what i'm talking really this is like your favorite thing to watch the last waltz one of my favorite things to like do you know what it is no what is the last waltz you don't know you're younger um it is the band you know the band Levin Helm Robbie Robertson

all these guys they're mostly dead now but they had a last concert and they knew everybody so Van Morrison was a guest

Joni Mitchell was a guest Neil Young was a guy all my all the people I grew up with crying in the car too especially Van Morrison I would cry you know Van Morrison

I love Van Morrison he's the Irish guy he's great Your favorite Van Morrison song? I'm going to say St. Dominic's preview, maybe. Pretty good song. Yeah? I just love it.

They're so soulful. He's so soulful. And I used to, I went through a lot of breakups when I was younger, when I was hot. There was a lot of mixed feelings. I would hurt people. They would hurt me. Now that I'm like this, it's very straightforward. It's pretty kind of dry.

Please have sex with me. you know but back then a lot of hurt feelings because of my physical prowess right and i would cry in the car a lot and van morrison there would be a particular did you ever have this in your life a particular song that would turn on the waterworks i got a couple in the brain well one was happy birthday happy birthday that would really bring back some sad memories and felice navidad ironically i could both ways it really have really me for some reason. Waterworks. Felice, that we don't know why. Other language's birthday just gets me good. Van Morrison, we were born before the wind, right?

We were born before the wind. I mean, yeah, what a, one of the best songwriters. I had a big crush on James Taylor when I was a kid. I think because my dad liked James Taylor, so I like James Taylor. Where are you from? Chicago. Oh, you're a Chicago guy. Okay. I think because my dad liked James Taylor in the car, I like James. So it reminds me of the 90s of smoke when people would smoke in their car, when that was a very normal thing with windows up, you know? Or he would crack it.

My dad would crack it just like this much. Fireman. No, he was. No, no, he was. My grandfather was. No, my dad was construction. Oh, wow. And he would crack it just a little bit so some would get out, but we'd still be in a haze.

And the smell of the sun on a cloth car, on an Oldsmobile seat with smoke soaked in it. I've seen fine I've seen rain Man that that would always get me I'd be like you mean he never He never saw her again Just the way I'm not never going to see

Manuela again She didn't die in a crash But same same same Same shit Let me name some artists you tell me if you like them or hate them It's a pepotone Love them or hate them And go into great detail

Okay I want to know Yes Mr. Yes Yes yes And go into detail of how much you like them or dislike them okay okay um zeppelin love them

fucking love them the beetles fucking love them as a matter of fact do you have serious x-em radio in your car don't have it anymore i gave it up oh you left well they did the renewal thing and then they were charging so much money that i was like oh really the higher they go the more i'm in

you're like more charge me more you say I use reverse psychologies, reverse psychology on these subscription things. You want to charge me higher? I'm like, I'll see you, and let's see when you're going to raise it. It's a poker game to me. Smart, dude. And I'm always bluffing because I'm out of money. Right, right.

It doesn't matter. You're not going to pay the bill anyway. It doesn't matter. Yeah. But I grew up, my first album, like, you know, I was born in 1958. No, you weren't. Were you really? I thought you were younger than that for sure

I look younger and I seem younger The way you live is youthful Yes The way I live is such a bond vivant I go from diner to diner You know By the way doesn't it suck That there's not many diners

Yeah they're all Well we don't I think What the fuck is that Because we don't want to sit and eat anymore We want we want to go Really you think it's that I think American culture is go

I want you want to sit I know you love the crosswords. You just want to go. Like eggs. People want to go. They got to go. Everything is to go. I got to get it to go. We've got to go. We've got to go. We've got shit. People have too much shit to do.

That's true. As comics, we don't. That's right. We have almost nothing to do. We just make shit to do. You know what's even more hilarious than comics are actors. Yeah. Those are real people. Those are what? They're not real people. They're not real people. And I

originally, I took a lot of acting courses in New York. So I originally was really going to be an actor, you know. But you are a great actor, but I'm okay. No, you're pretty good, man. No, I love comedy. I always love comedy. I always wanted to be a stand-up, but I started taking all these acting lessons.

When you take acting lessons, you know, the teachers really take the shit seriously. Oh, yeah. And so I started to think, this is going to be my means of expression to get back at my parents. Smart. How did that work out? Not good because It's tough to be a really good actor Yeah

Because you got a fucking You've done it too Yeah but not good I've done it to my only ability Which is like as good as I can be But I feel like a fraud Because when you're with real actors I get

I'm like forget about it Yeah you ever fucking You ever fucking be with a real actor You're like watching them And holy shit So that's what you do That's what it's supposed to be Well how can I keep faking it

That's what it is How do I keep pretending like I'm just to go, and I'm glad I don't go on them anymore, I just will not do it. I used to audition and the most humiliating thing in the world for commercials. Oh, I did. What do you mean?

I did it for years, and years and years and years. Oh, my God. The last one I ever did was for something, I forget what the product was, but it was a potato chip that prevented anal leakage. And I kid you not about that. I know you think it's a bit. And of

course, and I've had this many times, where the director of these shit commercials are British, and they're like, Eddie, you're not doing a proper lay. Yeah. You know? I don't believe the leakage, Eddie. I don't believe that it's blocking the league. He yelled at me, actually, and I yelled back.

And then I got a call from my agent, my commercial agent, who I love. She was hot. They're always good-looking commercial agents. She was. Yeah, they usually are. And she cared about me. She said, do you know? And she kept me in the game a little bit for a while.

I'd never booked them, but she said, do you know that this commercial could change your life? She would say it like that. Anil leakage chips could have changed your life? Not anal, but one of, you know, like a big national or whatever. You know, it could change your life. Eddie, it could change your life. What does that do to you when somebody says that? Well, from a pretty, from an attractive woman, it makes me think, yes, she's correct.

But from an ugly guy. I think, you know, they're idiots. Right, right. You do what I say to them. To her, I say, I will try to please you. try try is the keyword what you got the chip what's the yeah olestra also known as olene oline chips oh lean chips never booked it and i never went back did you ever book any commercials you've had to have book commercials what was that you've booked commercials yeah everybody

says that i must have booked something maybe one but i don't remember it because i would go in with such an attitude. When I got to L.A., which was 2003, I would drive, you know, it was before all this bullshit with the pandemic, so everything was in person. Yeah. And I would have to drive to Santa Monica.

I was living in Hollywood back then, and I hated it. Yeah, the drive along. Yeah, the drive alone. I would drive super pissed off, and all the commercials were like, honey, ha, ha, ha, how did you get this shirt so fresh? And I would just be pissed about it

And they knew it They would sense my anger Eddie, no, no Just a warmer warmer they would say This is as warm as I can be This is all I could be Have you fought the traffic

Today? And I can't leave now till 7.30 Right Like you ever get stuck on the west side? You're stuck, I have to go out Now I have to go get a taco And sit in my car and wait Yeah

Until I can manageably get home within an hour and a half. Yes. That's what it is. Yeah, I used to wait it out and on the beach, just getting burnt on the beach, just sitting on the beach because I read, the ocean heals you, you know, and I would be near the ocean and just, it would be too hot after a while. You know, I didn't have a, I didn't have a beach umbrella, I didn't have a blanket, I'd just be sitting there in my audition clothes, you know. On the sand. On the sand. Just loving it.

You don't seem like a beach. beach guy, Eddie. I'm not. I'm not, but I, I love the, I do love the water. Yeah, you like to swim, huh? I'm scared of the ocean, but I love swimming, man. I love big pools. Yeah. Yeah. Do you have one? I don't have a big pool, no. I don't have anything. But we can break into any big pool at any time. That's true. I thought about the first time I came to L.A. when I flew over, and I thought, look at how many these people have pools. All these people have pools. That was, that's the stereotype of LA. It's so funny. Like you see the big pools in Bel Air and Beverly Hills. They don't use

them. Brentwood. Yeah. I don't think they do. They don't ever use. Why would they use the pool? It's like a Bluetooth speaker. The same thing. In their mind the same way. Mind the same way. You mean we build the pools. I don't know an accident. No, that's good. We build the pools and they don't swim? Why don't they swim? They're Italian. Why don't you swim? They're Italian.

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I like gingers. I'll tell you, I had a beautiful Italian moment. My dad is, you know, he's wonderfully old and kind of closed-minded, and he's in his home. He's in his, you know, this is how I think.

Yeah, they're all in Chicago. Nobody leaves. I got out. I escaped. I'm Andy Dufrein from Shawshankford. I'm, by the way, yes. By the way, you have a big poster and they don't know you're gone. They have no idea. You're your back bedroom.

No, Rita Hayworth is still on my bedroom wall. They've yet to discover. I'll see an Andrew in a few years. Yeah, he'll call. Ah, fuck it. They'll call. But I love the comedy audiences there, though. I love performing in Chicago.

Chicago, Boston, Philly. I performed, yeah. I performed the special that's on Veeps now in Chicago in Lincoln. Lincoln Park. Hall. Oh, Lincoln Hall. Oh, wow. Which is mainly a music venue.

Yeah. But I've done stand-up there, and I like it. I just love the Chicago audiences. Chicago is, it's like the best of the East Coast, but has a more homey or feel. So it has East Coast people, but yeah, they do. Yeah. They fucking get it. And what were the other cities you named?

Philly, Boston. Yeah. I love Philly for some. Philly's always been so good. I love New England in general. Yeah, New England in general is always really good to me. Philly too, huh? Yeah, Philly's great to me.

I don't know why. Yeah, yeah, I like Phippsburg, on the other hand. Not so nice to me. Well, you've got to get the right place. Bottle Rocket. Have you done that? No. It's a good place. Pittsburgh never really hit for me. I don't know why. Yeah. Well, it's a disgustingly drab.

Bridges. A lot of bridges they brag about these bridges. Yeah. But I've had this place. And the Pittsburgh hipsters love me. The pitsters. Yeah, they call them pitsters. Yeah, they call them pitsters. Yeah. That's great. Wait. Oh, so let me say this. This blew my mind that we were at. I took my mom and dad and we're walking in in Italy and. And the guy says, he's asking about it. We're at a, we're at a vineyard. And my dad is asking about the cultivation of the grape. Well, when do you decide to pick them?

You know, I don't know anything about one. Cultivation of the grapes. Oh, so you're in a vineyard, yeah. Yeah, and he said, you know, and the woman says, well, we used to pick later in the season, but now we pick earlier because of climate. And my dad goes, oh, really? And so I'm like, well, here's a farmer saying to my dad. dad, well, the climate is literally changing.

I have to change the way I pick grapes. And he was like, your dad isn't buying it. He didn't buy an inch of it. He was like, no, that's probably because of the something, you know, because of the timing of the wine, and I go, I don't know, she's totally the fucking,

a farmer, but a farmer's like, no, we have to because of the grapes. It will go bad, the early, because of the climate. My dad, no fucking chance. Swirling, no way. Yeah, and we wonder why there's no hope of the divisions in this country being

healed because everybody is like oh really is that oh is that so really you don't do your own research i guess that you don't do your own research is my favorite oh you got to do your own research man no i let i let the doctors tell me what a shemy is what do they know they don't know what they don't know shit they're bought and paid for what you know what's fucked up about a lot of it is they're partly right sure like yeah doctors are bought and you know there's an element that they are and paid for by pharmaceutical. Yes. But also, they also know the body better than you, Luigi.

No, I don't think you do. I don't think they do. I know it better than you, a Pepitone. We're making a pulse. Everybody is bought and paid for. Everything is a lie. And I think you just pick which version of the lie of life that you're interested in. Yes, at this point.

You know, and I've always been someone who rails just because my dad was a union leader and I will always very left wing and I always railed against the rich and at this point I'm just like hoping I do become rich so you can rail against yourself I mean you do love we love to self-hate comics love self-hate oh so that's the best part about it then if you get you'll become a billionaire soon we know after the veep thing takes off well it depends on the left ventricle that's going that ischemia stays away if the ishebia stays dormant then you're I'm okay. I do want you, you said it, you breezed over it, but what you said you've been out loud, critical about billionaires.

Not a hot take, but give me your version of it. Why, what's your biggest beef? Well, just that, and I've always been like this because my dad was a union leader, always rallying. The first book my dad ever gave me was called The Rich and the Super Rich by a guy named Ferdinand Lundberg. And he just talked about how the American, I don't think he lived in America, but how the American population is busy being distracted by everything while the banks and the insurance companies bend them over and just fuck them.

And he was so visceral, he was great. And so my take is that the polarization of wealth now in the country, now it's like the worst it's ever been almost in history. Like you got Bezos and those guys, Mosque, Bezos, I don't know who the other. Zuckerberg. Zuckerberg. Fucking Branson.

Gates. All these guys, right? By the way, who needs a billion dollars? Not only they have a billion dollars, they have $110 million. 100 billion, yeah. And then, like, the bottom 50% of America has, like, you know, a hot plate in the Mark Twain hotel over here. You ever see the Mark Twain hotel? Do you ever see the Mark Twain?

hotel in fucking Hollywood. You would think Mark Twain would have a better hotel in his name. But then again, I don't know if you know anything about Mark Twain. He went bankrupt a few times. He had a fucking very unlucky life.

But didn't a lot of these great artists go do this? He wasn't. It wasn't self-inflicted by Twain. And do you know that Mark Twain, do you know this? He was really the first. He needed to tour the country and gave lectures. He was basically the first stand-up comic. No shit. He used to just go across the United States and then probably Europe, but he went across the United States

just making people laugh. Speaking engagements. Was he ever reading anything he wrote or no, it was just him speaking. I'm not sure about that, but he was funny, Mark Twain. Yeah, well, I think the interesting thing about like the great artist or or orators or anything in that, You read all these things about a lot of these guys died broke and they're immortalized for their art. And you go to a fucking museum and you see an art piece and it's worth, you know, Sotheby's is like, this piece is $175 million. Van Gogh's the best example of that. And he died super poor, right? He was broken.

Super poor. He's cutting off body parts. He sold that ear for money. Yeah, he needed that money. He's mailing body parts. And back then in Holland, the mail system was very slow. Not as good as it is today. By the time his ear got to the woman, you know, it was shriveled and not impressive.

The gig was up. The gig was up. That's so funny to think that the male was so slow, the joke didn't land by the time it got there. Too much time had changed. And comedy is about timing, and it just didn't work. It was really Van Gogh thought this would hit. Didn't hit. No, but his paintings were mega millions.

Hundreds of, yeah, I don't even know. You know, of a wick, a chair or whatever, you know. And meanwhile, the guy wound up, you know, just making a life in a ditch that he dug. It's crazy. What's his name? Michelangelo had lead poisoning because of his ditching in his eyes. He wasn't one of those broke guys. No, no, no.

But I'm saying like he just would rather die doing art. Yeah. How do you feel about that? Of die doing art? Well, comedy. We're doing it right now. We're dying right now live and from these people. I feel like comedy is one of those things that we are, we are such a, we're a stepchild of the world.

We're loved, but it's not, it's not, we're not actually this kid. You know, we're not the kid. And I said it as a step, as a stepson. We didn't get the love we needed. Right. Okay. And my mom was in and out of mental institutions. This is for real when I was a young, young, young.

kid. So I definitely didn't get any mother love, which is why when any woman gives me any kind of attention, I'm like, it's crazy. But here's something I read that I think will perk you up a little, is that stand-ups and people who perform and get love from audiences, which we do, it lengthens your life big time. Theirs or ours. Both. Both. But definitely ours. Like all the, that love that we get on stage is a huge, I don't know what, endorphin hit or whatever it is, but it's the same as your mother saying, you know what? You are a good little man.

That's all we wanted. Yeah. You only wanted to hear that. You're a good little man. I scream at the audience at the end of my set. Am I a good little man now? No, I just think stand-ups are this cultural phenomenon where they like you. They like you, but they don't need us.

I mean, you don't know what I mean? It's like they like you, but if one day somebody goes, stand-ups gone forever, everyone would go, ah, what are you going to do? If you took away music, people would be really mad. Oh, yeah. On the scale of performance art, if you took us away, people would be bummed, but I feel like they would get over us. And that's kind of the life of a stand-up. They go, man, that stinks.

No, but it is true because of the way things have gotten particularly here that, I don't know if you hear this, but, oh, we need stand-ups more than ever. They say that. That kind of thing. They say that. They say that. But I feel like we are a valuable part of society. But again, in the revolution, okay, when the time comes for the dogs and the animals to kill us, right? And the sacrifice.

Who gets to go first? They'll go, who do we save? The dogs will go, who do we save? and they'll go, we need people to help us physically, so we'll need someone with some of doctoral... No, we're on the lower... We're the bottom of the bottom. Lower of the... It's us, jugglers.

Jugglers and mimes are pretty close. Knife throwers are useful in a time of war. Right? So they're multifaceted. We need more skill set. I think we are very valuable. I just also think that stand-up gets a... Stand-up does get a societal... It's got its moments in time and it goes away. Like, you know, when they joke about,

the ebbs and flows of stand-up it's it was a boom in the 80s it was a boom yeah but then people get sick of our shit there's never been a time of music where they go it was the music boom no it's it's it's a forever if if music musicians are making more art people want to see new music hear new music when we have when they're tired of us they go god guys go away for a little bit yeah and i feel like they they they this this is what's hurtful is that they like us very selectively like they'll a few of us out and go, we like those people. That's the one we like. Who is he? Like, they love

to go, who the fuck is that? I never heard of him. Right. And if I never heard of him, he must suck. It's the opposite with bands. They'd go, who is this band? With a comic, they go, who the fuck is that

asshole? You know where it's different? I swear to God, and I'll know if you experience this, I don't know how much you go overseas, but they really take comedy seriously in the UK. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they want good comedy. Yeah. Well, we brought them a bunch of shit.

You what? We brought them bullshit. I did the Edinburgh Fringe Festival twice, which by the way almost killed me both times. But they would have huge and I wasn't used to this, huge newspapers reviewing my show. Oh, that scares the shit out of me.

That's such a big deal. It was. Because you're there for a month, right? You're doing a show a night for 30 days? Is that what it is? It was ridiculous. I did it twice. That schedule, you'd have one day off in 30 fucking days. Wow. It was like Ground Talk Day. But it made you, it's true, it's strengthened your comedy is what everybody says. Big time. Yeah, they just say it's you're, you are really putting in the, when we, if you live. If you live. And it's like mentally, there's a lot of people fucking break down mentally, seriously. It's pretty cool. But yes, it's like rooting for a hurricane. Right. That's our hurricane.

Holy shit, did you hear about Will Stevens? What happened? He's losing it. He doesn't come out of the apartment on high street. That's Day 17. You're just over half and you're breaking. By the way, they did a movie or did a TV show. What?

Baby Reindeer. Oh, my God. It was about a guy who did fringe who started to have mental breaks, right? That's what that was about. Well, yeah, a stocker starts. Did you see it? Yeah, Baby Ranger was great. But I mean, the idea of- He did a one-person show.

you're right and some people have got also the the woman who did i forget her name phoebe waller some she did flea baller bridges yeah she did a one person show and became huge some people well because they because i think both of those things uh embraced the zeit guys this chaos and the sadness of how how heavy that is to perform all the time and barking for you're really singing for your soup that's truly old school like please come see me please come see me, please come see me. Yeah, I luckily didn't have to do that because... You co-headlined with Kevin Hart, that's why.

Kevin Hart's material sings overseas. But you did co-headline, you and Kevin... I heard myself running! That's my Kevin Hart. That's a good Kevin Hart. That's not bad. I hurt myself a-rarning. I always use the accent.

That'll get me in the least trouble. But I... I broke my mind. ankle. Can you believe? God, this Kevin Hart is good. This Kevin Hart I like. Hello, I'm Kevin Hart. But I came back from the French Festival both times. So sick, bronchitis like no rest and my act tends to be loud at the end of the first run, the first 30 they said I did, I had no voice by

the last week. So the last week, and that's when they were deciding who would get best of the fringe. And of course, my manager, and the people, they were going, you got a shot at best of the fringe. They're here tonight.

And I'd be like, I had no voice. And the stress. Yeah, the stress is heavy on you. Are you writing every day that, are you redefining the act or are you just perfecting yet? I mean, you know, I'm very improvisatory, but at some point I just was like, if I get through the show, like day 23, if I get to day 30, that's a victory.

It's a war of attrition at some point. And that's who really, did you win that year? Who won? I didn't win, no. Who did? Do you remember? I forget some scumbag. You know, somebody who had an act, and I'm serious, where they didn't see. say a word and they were taped up

and duct tape. Oh, it's, I know who this is. Oh, yeah. Or, I mean, I've seen it before on the internet. I know who this is. Yeah, it's like a tape guy. Yeah, tape. The tape comic, if you look that up, that's a... Yeah, yeah, tapeface or something. Tapeface. Yeah, tapeface. Yeah, tapeface. I don't know. I think that's the name. Yeah, look that up. It was kind of brilliant, and I thought,

that's how you save your voice. Lesson learned. Lesson learned. Just start taping, Eddie. Why are you wasting all this time? Yeah, I'm just sitting in an office. on Wilshire with my agent going I'm going to tape myself this year in Edinburgh

you mean record it no no you see this duct tape I just got at DIY I am going to tape my whole body my whole body not say a word and just throw myself in the audience and and the guy was doing shit like he'd be

in front about it in somebody going like and it was just this thing that was the thing and it did well I guess right it did very well he won And I was like, what about me? They're like, we're flying you home. You have to go. They don't fly you home, right?

You have to put yourself out there. Don't you have to do that? Don't they make you fly yourself and put yourself up and stuff? Yep. In my case, I had it paid for the first year. I think both years, actually. But most people go down 10 grand. Wow, that's crazy.

10 grand to do that. Pain. And then they all say, oh, it was great experience. Not all of them. The honest people will be like, I'll fucking never do it again. One and done. Ari, I think, Shafir told me he was like, you've got to try it once. Yeah.

And I was like, I want to, I don't know. It just had scared the shit out of me. That much is that. You would probably do great, though. And you're, you know, I got to Ireland. You know what was interesting? It's like I got to perform in a lot of places around the world because of that. Yeah, right.

That opens you up to that. Yeah, they see you. You know, I got to do Melbourne. I got to do Oslo. I got to do Ireland. How's Oslo? Good? They were amazing. They speak, and this is always funny to me,

they speak better English than us. Of course. Yeah, we don't take it serious, right? We got a free ride. We didn't have to pay for the ride. We got the free ride. We got the free ride. We're born here. We got the gift of all the shit.

No, but I couldn't believe the response I got in Oslo. Very good, they would like you. Do that right. You know what's hard? For me, anyway, I performed, and I performed, and I did it. three times in Amsterdam. Oh, I've never before. And they don't laugh that much. But they still like you.

They like you, but you don't hear it, and I have to hear it. Like, I'm like, Mommy? Where are you? You're not institutionalized again, are you, mom? Mommy. How many times did she really go to that

beautiful place? A bunch, and she wound up there at the end of her life, and it was like... No. That's tough. Yeah. Oh. I mean, I mean, that's why, you know, I am what I am, as Pope, I would say, it's like, and at the end of a life, I mean, that's why everything to me and I don't, like, a disaster like the World Trade Center happens, and I'm like, and I was right there. Yeah. I was living in New York where I had to go through a checkpoint to get to my apartment. It was, Jesus.

I lived near Union Square. It was really nice. It was the best place I ever had in New York, and then the fucking Twin Towers came down. And I immediately got out of New York. I was like, I think L.A. is looking good. Yeah, an honest New Yorker. Everybody else was like, we got to stick together. You're like, I've already bought my ticket.

I'm out of you. I don't think Al-Qaeda is going to hit Warner Brothers. And yet they have. And yet they have. Eddie, I want to say thank you for coming on the show. Also, please watch his special right now. And we'll put the link in the description. And when it's not on Veeps anymore,

it'll be on YouTube. Yeah. So please watch it regardless. You're brilliant, you're funny, you're wonderful. Thank you. You got to get to the gym. I know your agent said he's got to get to the gym. I'm getting to heirloom where they have good eggs.

God bless heirloom. You know it? Oh, what do you mean? Of course. I love heirloom. It's one of the best. Me too. I'm hungry.

Okay, we'll get you there. We end the show the same way. You look in that camera and you're single and you say one word or one phrase to end the episode. T. In here, we pour whiskey, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk. You were that creature in the ginger beard. Sturdy and ginger. Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse.

Ginger's abugers. You owe me $5 for the whiskey and $75 for the horse. Ginger's, oh, hell now. This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.