Whiskey Ginger with Andrew Santino - Kevin Smith

Episode Date: June 6, 2025

Filmmaker, writer, and podcasting pioneer Kevin Smith (Clerks, Dogma, Jay & Silent Bob) sits down with Andrew Santino for a wildly honest and hilarious episode of Whiskey Ginger.Kevin shares stories behind the making of Dogma, his friendship with George Carlin, and how he gave Jason Lee his first-ever acting role in Mallrats. This one’s got everything: cult classics, career reinvention, spiritual growth, and a few outrageous rants in between. 🎬 If you’ve ever quoted Clerks, debated Dogma, or cried during Chasing Amy This episode is for you. 37 D**KS!? LOL 📺 Watch now and hit subscribe for more deep, weird, and funny convos every week on Whiskey Ginger with Andrew Santino. #KevinSmith #WhiskeyGinger #AndrewSantino #Clerks #ComedyPodcast #JayAndSilentBob #IndieFilm #PodcastInterview #Smodcast #dogma ==========================================================Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS HOF BET USE PROMO CODE: WHISKEY TO GET A 7 DAY FREE TRIAL & 50% OFF YOUR FIRST MONTH! Download The App Today! SQUARESPACE GET 10% OFF YOUR ORDER https://squarespace.com/whiskey LIGHTSTRIKE HARD REFRESHER AN EXCELLENT SOURCE OF 5% ALCOHOL https://drinklightstrike.com KICKOFF GET YOUR FIRST MONTH FOR $1 https://getkikoff.com/whiskey ======================================= Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcas thttps://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria https://www.instagram.com/itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What up Whiskey Ginger fans welcome back to the show. It's the first time joining the show. Welcome to the show. Man, thank you for the journey. We're in the middle of the summer. We're cruising along. We got a lot of great episodes coming up and I'm traveling a whole bunch. Including to London and Dublin. Me and Bobby Lee are playing London and Dublin July 18th and 19th. Go to BadFriendsPod.com or AndrewSantino.com. Either way, BadFriendsPod.com to come see me and Bobby Lee in London and Dublin. One time only we may not come back together. Who knows? So, check it out. Let's go to the episode. In here we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

Oh, that creature in the ginger beard. Sturdy and ginger. Like that, the ginger gene is a curse. Ginger's a pugilist. You owe me $5 for the whiskey and $75 for the horse. Ginger's a hell no You owe me five dollars for the whiskey, and seventy-five dollars for the horse. Ginger's all hell no. This whiskey is excellent.

Ginger. I like gingers. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whiskey Ginger. My guest today is one of my favorite people on Earth. I say that for all my guests when I meet him once again today. It is legendary Kevin Smith. I feel like we're wasting our time here. Why aren't we in an auction house? Do that again. That was so fast. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whiskey Junior.

My guest today is one of my favorite people on Earth. He's the head of the set of all my guest money meetings I get today, it's Kevin Smith. I mean now, now. 45 to 79, 45 to, yeah. Yes, I'm telling you man. Like if this don't work out, this podcasting thing, although there's not pictures of you,

seems to be working out. Fan made. No, I made these. Hot calling and auction calling. I could do it, I could do it. I mean my career is struggling. Hollywood is not calling, so I should do calling. I could do it, I could do it. I mean my career is struggling, Hollywood is not calling, so I should do calling.

Hold my beer, fuck. Well the problem is I keep showing Hollywood, they're like what do you wanna do next? I'm like, Clerks 3, they're like fuck, another Clerks. So they've lost interest in me a long time ago. Good news is I didn't wait for Hollywood or whatever that is to start my career. I started on my own, like I'm an indie filmmaker at heart.

So even when the business has no use for me and there are many years running in a row where they have no use for me, I still find a way to do what I do. Yeah, no, you've done a great job, by the way, for people that are- Let's talk about that fucking jersey, man. Well, I mean, I wore it for you.

Look at that. I wore it for you. Copper and a blue. I just played Edmonton and they gave me this as a gift. Edmonton was one of the first cities. Where did you play at Edmonton? I played a casino, but I usually play, last time we were there, do you remember where we played?

The synagogue, the temple. I played, yeah, there's two synagogues I play, yeah. There's a place there that I've played, no, there's a place that's normally like a temple, but then on the weekends, it's a venue. What is the name of it? But I played there a few times when I love Edmonton I was big Oilers fan not when it was happening right with Gretzky and stuff years later I became a legacy Oilers fan and stuff. So I spent a long time Doing things in the city is great place Alberta. Alberta is a special has a special place in my heart. I headlined

They're young. I love it. Really, so when you were a kid, they were like, we'll take you up here. They took me on when I was too early. You got a Canadian look about you. Do I? They're like, oh, you could pass. They probably looked at you and they're like,

come home, son. Straight out, straight out Regina. Get out here, eh? Get up here and do your gig, bud. Go up there and go for it, eh? They're like, this is not the red of the red and the white, but never blue. It's pretty matchy to this, man.

I mean, I'm pretty close. You are blending. It's almost like a green screen effect. It's like where you gotta... I'm gonna disappear. You are right. It's also game one is tonight. I mean, I know this podcast will be out after, but game...

And it's Florida versus the Oilers made it? Yeah, man. That's a second year in a row where they got pretty damn deep. It's a big deal. Nobody wants Florida to win. You can't. A hockey team from Florida is crazy. But they've done it before. I know that's what's even more nuts. Tampa Bay was the same. We're already talking about a dynasty team. This is way more sports than I'm sure most people want to talk about but this

is a dynasty team to begin with. They won three cups with Gretzky, one without. So they got four cups of their name. They got close on two other occasions, maybe three. This could be the moment. This could be it. And is Connor McDavid still... He's the man. Probably one of the greatest of all time.

The greatest of all time. No, one of them. This could be Jesus' moment. This could be it. You got me excited. I pulled my head out of the hockey world. I've had my head lodged firmly up the ass of dogma for the last month and change So I've been paying attention to much and I did know that

Florida made it in because I saw it in my feed, but I didn't know they were going Dead with the oil boys. I that's an easy pick for me. Yeah, it's Edmonton all the way for you All the way, you know, I I say that with a mom who lives in Florida but still like the to see Canada hoist a cup again a Canadian team for somebody who's not from Canada, but does appreciate Canadiana it would be meaningful. It would be right. I'm saying yeah, and mom is in Florida. Shout out to mom We love mom. We always love mom. We love mom, but without mom we wouldn't be here. That's exactly right at all For people that are are perhaps too young. I do have some youngish fans on the show initiated

Who am I you you you are you are I'm like wait, he's the guy from King of Queens Yeah, yes the other Kevin Kevin. No, you are such a Profound influence in most of my that's why circle of friends life and drove over here to hear words like you are I mean not your movies shaped my shaped my comedic youth my young adulthood the way we spoke to each other the way we joke to each other you know or bit that was so important to our seeing something that went as young guys that wanted to get in the comedy and make stuff We were like that's who we want to do that We want to fuck around and do that stuff so it was kind of like that gave us this little like oh

We could do shit like that you can be with your friends Write these beautiful funny goofy weird scenes and make I mean clerks was such a Big part of our youth in our life and chasing Amy. It's like all these things Amara They became our entire packaging of who we became. Let me tell you something. All right, get the fuck out of here. I know, I'm done. We're never gonna be better than that, Jesus Christ.

I run the risk of ruining all that by saying something stupid like this. How the fuck are you not playing Archie? I know, dude. Like fucking, this is the Archie movie I wanna make where he's just like, you know, it was neither Betty nor Veronica It was Jughead the whole time. It's about two dudes who are like deeply in love. They'll never fuck That's basically clerks. That is I feel like you who would be your Jughead before we get back to me

I gotta know who would be my Jughead. I mean Bobby Bobby isn't Bobby Lee is an easy pick I mean, but give me you know, and that helps He is my best. We don't want to white guys. Yeah Fucking thing put a crown on him. Right cock it. Yeah, maybe it'll be maybe we could I could see glassman being are you guys tight? Yeah, oh, he's my best. He is my best friend. He's in a movie I'm in a movie with him, but he's in a movie with my friend. He's in logic's movie Oh, yeah, I'm just I was supposed to be in it. You were gonna be in it as well?

Right now I'm really sad, yeah. What scene? Logic called me. Because I was the editor, exec produced it and I was the editor of the movie. He told me, he told me you were doing it and he called me, I couldn't do it, I was working. I love that movie.

It debuts at Tribeca next week. You can't tell I say that word 26 times a day. Dogma comes out June 5th in theaters everywhere. 2,000 screens across the country. June 6th, I'm gonna be at the Rebecca Film Festival as Logic debuts his first film. Kids, this picture is called Paradise Records. It's fucking beautiful.

Six months from now, a lot of people are gonna be talking about it and shit. Do you remember where you were gonna be? Were you gonna be in the Bobby Lee scene? Yeah. So you were gonna be getting baked with Logic logic's dad. Yeah, I screwed up team Well, I had to work and he was like, I can't this is why you're not playing Archie Starts with a logic movie and then I know you get fucking returned to Riverdale

I'm not doing the right things man. Well, the kid in the river did they date they dyed his hair, right? He wasn't even a exactly. Yeah In the in Riverdale from CW? That pissed me off. Not only not a redhead, from what I remember, and this is not being me, you know, being fucking MAGA, but not an American. He's not one of us?

I don't think so. If I remember correctly, I believe, can we look that up? America first. I think he might be from Australia. He's an Australian, the kid from Riverdale? And when I heard that, I was like, we can't have a Superman, We can't have a Batman. It's always some Brit and stuff.

But I think he came from some other place, too. He keeps taking it away. All of our comic book icons. Yeah, he's from Auckland, New Zealand. There it is. God! From Enzi right there. He's not even from Australia? He's from the other one?

How can he inhabit the soul of Archie? And yet did for like fucking how many seasons in general? Apparently he did a great job, by the way, so kudos to that kid. Kudos to him. But wait, back it up. Dogma.ma, you're re-releasing Dogma in 2,000 years. We're calling it the 25th anniversary,

technically it's the 26th, but like the Catholic Church, we're stretching the truth a little bit. Yeah. No, no, no. To tell a story, yeah. No, no, no. Have faith, kids. Have faith in this 25th anniversary.

New pope, new pope. That's how they treat you. New pope sweeps clean, as they say, so now's the time to bring it out. We started our tour, because I've been touring for like the last month, which is fucking beautiful. Talk about an easy sell.

Easier to sell dogma than it is to sell, like me and Jay had just come off of, we toured in February the oral sex tour, me and Jason, he was the guy, I'm always standing next to professionally or personally. So we went out and did the oral sex tour, A-U-R-A-L-S-E-C-T-S. And man, I was putting, fucking tweeting and Instagramming, storying and TikToking right up till showtimes,

getting asses in seats. Dogma? Like we did, we're doing a round of shows, they all sold out instantly. So I was like, I'm already in a place at another show that sold out as well So every night on the dogma tour easy sell because it's nostalgia Yeah people like oh fuck I saw this movie with my grandmother when I was a kid and she loved it I saw this movie with a lady. I got three kids with it's your fucking fault

And so like easy sell and then I get to come out afterwards in victory lab So you're not talking about like fuck I gotta come up with like an hour of new material and shit and fall. And so like easy sell and then I get to come out afterwards in victory lab. So you're not talking about like fuck I got to come up with like an hour of new material and shit. I've been telling dogma stories since 1999. So it was like oh my god, I go out Q&A style. But you know, you get to talk about whatever you want to talk about. So somebody asked the dogma questions, which we just watched dogma. I'm loaded for bear with stories I've been telling forever. So what an easy month. Like 20 cities I did when all said and done.

Two shows a night in Jersey, I did three shows because I own my own movie theater there. We were able to sell a little bit more because it's like, see it in my theater. And it was absolute bliss. Now me and Jared are going back out on the oral sex tour part two and Fuck selling tickets is just hard when you don't have like hey, I'm following dogma

You know, but but they were getting a killer value for dogma for like 50 bucks a ticket You see this old-ass two-hour movie, but then I would come out and do a two-hour Q&A afterwards two hours four fucking hours That's a lot. I love the sound of my own voice You want headphones? Do we give me? Yeah fucking you go away. I'm good So it has been Absolute fucking bliss man, and now it comes out just everywhere For people to see it because the tour was like number one we could make good money But number two it's a way to promote the movie before it just hit screens. Yeah, June 5th everywhere so it is coming out again, man and and

How lovely to stand behind something old. Generally speaking, I gotta go out there with something new all the time. You gotta convince people that you're still worth their fucking time, you're still relevant or something like that. So even a couple years ago we did Clerks 3, and it's like, at least it's got clerks in the title. Oh yeah, there's a three, ignore that partnership.

But still, you're asking people to take a chance on something they don't know. No clerks, they don't know what clerks three is gonna be like, and a lot of them were like, why'd you kill the fucking one guy? Dogma, everybody knows what it is. So every night I'd be like, how many people have seen Dogma before?

And you know, wah! I was like, all right, how many people have never seen it in a movie theater? And then there would be a lot of people, because a lot of people just saw it on home video. But then I'd always right, how many people have never seen it in a movie theater? And then there would be a lot of people because a lot of people just saw it a home video but then I'd always ask how many people have never seen this movie before tonight and Under two percent, but there would definitely be at least ten people clapping their hands and shit to which point I'd be like Why the fuck would you overpay to see a movie you've never seen before cuz you you're there I guess for you were dragged with some parent to whom the movie meant something.

So I become this legacy thing that people pass on. Something that in the beginning of my career I never planned for or thought about, like, oh man, maybe one day people will like my shit so much they'll give me to their kids. But I understand it because I was raised that way. My father gave me George Carlin. That was a gift from my father to be like,

you can handle this. At age nine, he gave me Class Clown. And then you got to work with him. Eventually. which is insane to me. I mean I made I'm not gonna Say I made that happen the universe is kind But I did on dogma go like I want George Carlin for Cardinal Glick and reached out We found his manager's numbers guy named Jerry. I called him up. I say miss Kevin Smith Scott Mosher We made clerks and he goes. I don't know what that is Well, you ain't gonna know the second movie at all mall rats. Nobody saw it. We made Clerks. And he goes, I don't know what that is. And I was like, well, then you ain't

gonna know the second movie at all, Mallrats. Nobody saw it. He goes, nope. I said, well, we got this movie now, Chasing Amy's got buzz and stuff. He goes, never heard of it. And I said, all right, well, I said, we did co-executive produce Good Will Hunting.

And he goes, Ben and Matt, I love those guys. And I was like, all right, man, well, we got the next Ben and Matt movie. We're making it, and we want George to be in it. He goes, you want George to be a comedian in your movie? I said, no. I want him to play a role. I want him to act.

He goes, what role would he play? I said, he'd play Catholic cardinal. He goes, fuck, George will love that shit. So he was like, send me a script. I was like, I'll do you one better. I'm gonna be on Late Night with Conan O'Brien back when he was on NBC. So I said, I'm the second guest, George's first guest.

I'll bring the fucking script. And he goes, I'll introduce you to George with the ball rolling and shit. So I said, I'm the second guest, George's first guest. I'll bring the fucking script. And he goes, I'll introduce you to George with the ball rolling and shit. And I couldn't wait. I was gonna meet my fucking childhood hero, man. Like, when you're a kid who loves your parent, like I know there are people out there that are like, I hated my fucking parents.

I love my parents. They were really cool people. We didn't have this super tight relationship like I got with my kid, but I fucking have so much respect for him. Even as a kid, I was like, these motherfuckersers have no money and they figured out how to raise three kids on a postal fucking Employee salary a guvvies salary and stuff and still take us places We went on like cool vacations like my father

I think because he worked at the post office to keep him from going postal and fucking killing people He would go on vacation once a year and we got to go as well And so he was like I want to do this keep him from going postal and fucking killing people. He would go on vacation once a year and we got to go as well. And so he was like, I want to do this, I want to see this. My father wanted to like see the world. So we saw most of America when I was a kid, even though we were fucking poor and shit. So growing up, that dude, he means something to me.

And not in that fucking like, you know, I love my daddy and shit. I just, he's my father My father's mystery is inscrutable as a fucking Iranian film to me. I could never figure him out because we never sat down and had a conversation like this. He was a 70s dad, very closed off. You just respected them and shit like that.

But I saw him light up watching Carlin. If you ever wanna know who somebody truly is, watch comedy with them. Because you'll see what makes them laugh, and you'll see like, not just their intelligence level, but their empathy level as well. It teaches you a lot about a motherfucker, and for somebody who wasn't sharing a lot, watching my father watch George Carlin

taught me more about my father than my father ever taught me about himself. You know what I'm saying? He wasn't that kind of guy But watching him fucking what he laughed at what he thought was funny the shit that I didn't understand which I would then go look Up independently long before there was an internet and shit made me smarter and also made me like Figure him out a little bit more. So my father loved George Carlin and I loved my father So it was a good bet that I was probably gonna grow up loving George Carlin and I did.

And so I got to make a movie one day and then I made another, made another, and then when we were making the fourth one, I was like, we gotta get this motherfucker. So his guy was like, you're gonna meet him at Conan. I said, this is great. I hang up the phone. Between the time I hang up the phone

and I'm gonna be on Conan, George's wife passes away. Rather suddenly. So you'd imagine and he'd be forgiven and be like, I ain't gonna fucking do some late show, fuck this. He still went. And it's, you know, number one, he was a professional. Number two, his wife ran his life. And so his wife was probably the one that set up that.

100%. So I think there was no chance he was going to miss it, because especially like when I met him later on, and when he had a conversation with me. So he did go do the show that night. He didn't do any of the material he'd been doing in his recent stand-up special. He did a much older desk piece where he could sit down and read from papers.

And he was still funny because he was George Carlin, but everybody in the audience knew his wife died. And so you could tell, again, not like he wasn't funny, but you could tell something was off. And the fact that he wasn't going up there and doing his current material communicated, look, I'm here, but I'm not here. So I was like, I saw Jerry that night,

and I was like, dude, this seems like the worst time to be like, hi, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here.

I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here.

I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I'm not here. I was like, I noon lunch. And I was like, fuck yeah. So I go and meet George Carlin. And I remember he comes up to the table and goes, Kevin Smith, George Carlin.

I said, oh my god. I know who you are. I'm a huge fan. He goes, I could tell because I read your script. I was like, did you like it? And he goes, kind of feel responsible for it. And I was like, well, yeah, man, you're a huge influence. He goes, huge influence, Kevin, there's some scenes

where I think I deserve co-screenwriting credit. And I was like, you know, we could talk about that if you're in the movie. And he goes, well, that's what I'd like to talk to you about. He's going, I want to be in it. He's going to fucks with the church, and I'm all for that sort of thing. He's going, but we got a problem.

He goes, as you know, my wife passed away recently. I was like, I know, I'm sorry. He goes, me too. I'm going to miss her. She was a cool lady. He's going, and because of that, I'm not ready to take off my wedding band right now. It's too soon for me. And I know if I'm playing a Catholic cardinal in your movie,

I can't be wearing a wedding band. They're married to Jesus or some such shit. So we find ourselves in an impasse. He goes, but I was thinking about it last night. I think I might have an idea. It could be a fix, but I got to run it past you and see if you like it. If you allow me to wear a band-aid around my wedding band,

in the scene I could be your Cardinal Glick, but in real life I can hold onto my wedding band, still be in your scene, still do what I need to do for myself. He goes, now, I know this might be a problem because then it tells a different story than you were intending to tell the Cardinal, he's clumsy, and maybe you don't wanna see

some big-ass band-aid on the big screen, but if you could see your way clear to let me wear band-aid around my wedding then I think I could be your Cardinal Glick what do you think and I was like I think I wish you were my fucking father I think that's the most beautiful shit I ever heard you can wear as many band-aids as you want so getting to work with like a comedy fucking legend you would think oh my god how how much funny did he bring to, I mean he brought the funny of hey, it's George Carlin.

But this motherfucker was, you would think as a guy who, for my estimation, if there's a comedy Mount Rushmore, his fucking face would be on it, right? You would think there's a guy who's like, I don't know who the fuck I am, I'm comedian George Carlin. He backed into that. That was something he didn't aim for, something he kinda settled for.

He wanted to be an actor, he wanted to be Danny Kay. He grew up going to movies with his brother and with his mom and his mom loved Danny Kay movies, so naturally he was like, well that's what I wanna do, it makes my mother happy and shit. So he wanted to be a song and dance man, a movie for kids that don't know who Danny Kay is. He played Hans Christian Andersen in a movie way long ago.

So that was George's dream was to act. He got cast a few times, right? He was like, with six you get egg roll, he was in the Bill and Ted movies, he was in, Barb Streisand put him in Prince of Tides, and I put him in fucking Kevin Smith movies. And I kept doing it, A, because I like being around George Carlin, but B, he loved to fucking act.

Like this is what he wanted to do with his life. He was so fucking method. It was crazy. He treated everything so fucking seriously. Even my goofy ass shit. Case in point, we're making Jay and Silent Bob strike back in which George's role in arguably is hitchhiker who blows trucker. That's it.

You don't have to be Daniel Day Lewis living the inner life of this character to bring this to life. But you could, it would help. He might do something with it unforeseen. George, I was like, it's a one note joke. George is on set, he goes, Kevin, I have a question for you as the author of this piece. And I was like, recognize?

And he goes, the unwritten book of the road, that's what I'm talking about. He goes, now do I believe in this shit or am I just fucking with these two assholes? I was like, wow, George, you've already given the script more thought than I did when I wrote it. I was like, so if I had to pick a side of the fence when I wrote it, I always assumed your character

was believing what he said. He goes, that's what I thought, that's what I thought, that's the intention I'm gonna play. And I was like, I think it's adorable that you're giving it this much effort, but you literally could phone this one in, man. Like, it's just you're blowing a trucker. And he goes, Kevin, you don't know anything

about the subtle art of performance, do you? And I said, no, enlighten me. And he goes, Kevin, you don't know anything about the subtle art of performance, do you? And I said, no, enlighten me. And he goes, well, I'm an actor. And that means it's my job to tell the lie that tells the truth. In order to do that, I need as much emotional honesty as possible, as much data as I possibly can in order to suspend the window of disbelief

so your audience can crawl through it into your magical world. So when I ask you these questions, I don't do it to be an unctuous actor who needs attention. I simply need you to tell me how deeply you want me to throat this guy's dick and I was like Maybe this much he goes. That's what I thought. That's the intention. I'm gonna play He was so fucking serious about it and wonderful to be around but you're you're a comedian, you know comedians and shit like that Biggest complaint I ever hear about comedians and perhaps the biggest complaint I would ever have about comedians, and I love comedians,

have nothing but the utmost respect and shit, and always have throughout my young life. Comedians who don't turn it off. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Comedians who are working 100% of the time. Now, God bless you, bringing that much merriment to the table at all times. What stamina? But it's tough to have a conversation with a dude who's on.

Yeah, it's tough. It's tough. But there is, there's two kinds of comics. Some people are always on and some people are more private and switch and go kind of dark or low or... Carlin was the other guy. You could sit there and talk to him about fucking anything. Just he was, he was a normal ass guy. And half the time as he was talking, you were going like, what, he doesn't feel the need to be funny?

No. No. And not because he's like, not until I'm paid. Just normal person, and what he did for a living was what he did for a living. It's his job. Now, and Rock was a young actor when he worked, a young comic and actor. And Rock was breaking. Like, huge. Now, you gotta remember, he had a fucking career, like this is a young actor when he worked, a young comic and actor. I mean, like, was his? And Rock was breaking.

Like, huge. Now, you gotta remember, he had a fuckin' career, like, this is a young kid who was in I'm Gonna Get You Suck Out. I'm Gonna Get You Suck Out, yeah. You got changed for a hundred? How much does a bucket of ribs? And also, he'd been on SNL,

and I was a huge NatX fan and shit. But then, after SNL, he dipped, but then he had role with the new and he kind of reestablished as a thinking man's comic. So he was breaking huge at that point and for some, he loved Chasing Amy for some reason. We all love Chasing Amy. I mean, God bless you all. But he, later on, he made a movie in life. He directed a movie, wrote and directed called Top Five, that feels like very chasing Amy to me.

And that movie meant something to him. So he was like, what are you doing next? And I was like, we're doing this movie Dogma, where we got Rufus the 13th Apostle and George, like I didn't even finish before he was just like, I wanna do that, that sounds amazing. So getting to work on the same set with two comics at the top of their fucking game,

like a legend and a growing legend. A legend to be, yeah. And they got to hang out, and I got to watch them hang out and pick each other's brains, was absolutely like spellbinding, in the process of getting to make my dream movie at the same time and this is before i ever took the stage uh... you know at a comedy club

i'd i'd got to comedy clubs like not the true conventional route was a cut thick on funny and i would get up on stage or something when you make a film and go to film festivals they push you out after the movie's done like go answer for yourself and shit you do q and a one and i'd never felt like comfortable about waxing air you died about filmmaking considering I'd made one movie and the movie looked like it was shot through a fucking glass of milk. So I couldn't stand up there and be like, here are my theories on cinema. But I had, I'd watched enough comics. I was a huge fan of standup comedy to know that

somebody puts a mic in your hand, fucking try to be funny. So I would get up there and be like, let me tell you how we got the cat shit on cue in the movie. And you know, there's a charming story attached to it. So I was up there for years doing cue and I was my favorite part of filmmaking. Like you know, fuck making the movies. I get to talk about them afterwards and stand on stage and make people laugh and shit like that and the immediacy of standing on stage and saying something funny and hearing people

react to it in real time beats a thousand percent. Having an idea, going, that's funny. And then one day, writing it down and putting in the context of something, and then hoping nobody ever has the same idea as you, and then finally finding money to execute and or elevate that idea or joke in a movie. And then editing and it survives that process.

And then through different screenings, it eventually winds up in the movie. And then years after you have this initial thought, maybe it gets the laugh you dream about two, three years prior. Standing on a fucking stage and being like, we kept that cat away from a litter box for two fucking days.

And hearing people instantly laugh, I was like, oh, this is way more preferable than what I do for a living and way cheaper in the process. But the great irony is, I don't get to get up there and tell those stories unless I'm dragging ass with a movie behind me. So my fucking tantalist, you know,

my underworld experiences, like, in order to do the thing I wanna do, I have to do the thing that the internet tells me over and over again for 30 years I'm not good at doing. So I have to put up with a lot of people being, you suck at your job, your movies suck, and be like, all right, all right. Because I know at the end of the process,

I get what I want, which is I get to stand on a stage and pretend to be a comedian. So I backdoored into comedy clubs and for years I would not do a comedy club because I was like I didn't earn that shit Like I did theaters like I sold out in the same bragging, but this is just to illustrate a point I sold out Carnegie Hall and bag of just doing Q&A being funny on a stage Without ever calling myself a comedian and never doing comedy clubs, because I was like comedy clubs are only for comics.

I'm not a comic, I just answer questions on a stage. There's a difference. But I knew for years that yes, I was answering questions on stage, but you know the art of Q&A is like, somebody's gonna say what they wanna say. You can say whatever the fuck you want. So you got like 96 stories loaded and ready to go,

and just like any ad lib artist or, you know, what was that shit where they're like. Improv comics? Improv comics where it's like a panda, a basketball. Figure out how to fit those two words in an already existing fucking sketch that you've gotten last before you're good to go. So it just fit like into my wheelhouse, you know, over time.

And so over time I started like getting rid of the movies. Like, it used to be I'd go to, I did colleges for like 10 years. It was amazing because I was so young when I started my career. I was close to the college kid's age. So they wanted me all the time. They would ask for me and shit.

And for the beginning of my career, I didn't know you could get paid for this sort of thing. So any college called me up, be like, hey man, we're showing Mallrats. You wanna talk about it afterwards? I was like, fuck yes, man. So I'd drive down to Delaware, I moaned, they'd be showing fucking Mallrats

at the theater at the campus and shit. Then afterwards I'd get up and talk about it, because these kids gave a fuck. Mallrats is a movie that's tanked at the theater, here's a bunch of college kids going, hey Jason Lee's funny, I was like, right? Fucking thanks, where were you? Fucking six months ago and shit like that.

So I did that for so long, and last time I did it for kind of for free I was at Rutgers Camden campus and you know fucking when you go I'm sure you've been to colleges student activities people bring in shit like that And so I you know I talked for two hours, and then I was like hey I've got these clerks cartoon man Nobody ever saw watch this shit And I went out and grab some cigarettes and one night because I was a big cigarette, I've got these clerks cartoon man. Nobody ever saw watch this shit. And I went out and grabbed some cigarettes and whatnot. Because I was a big cigarette smoker in those days.

So I'm outside grabbing a cigarette. The student activities girl was like, you're not done. I was like, I mean, do you need me to be done? She goes, no, you can keep talking as long as you want. And I was like, oh, great, because I love talking. And she goes, it's just you're gone. You've done double of what Janine Garofalo did already. And I was like, oh, Janine was here, because we'd made dogmas. She was in did already. And I was like, oh, Janine was here,

because we'd made dogma, she was in dogma. So I was like, oh, Janine was here? And she goes, yeah, she did it like 45 minutes, and then she left. And I was like, oh. And I'm smoking, and then she goes, and we paid her 25 grand. And I was like, what?

Yeah, I was like, why? What did she do? Did she save a life? And she was like, no, that's what people get paid to do. She's gone. You're the first person. We've ever booked who doesn't get paid and I was like Are you fucking serious like I thought it was just part of the responsibility of like I made these movies I got to talk about them for the rest of my life carry them around like herpes for the rest of your life So I figure like it's good for my business to go out and talk about these movies But never once occurred to me that I could get paid for that sort of thing.

So from that screening forward, I was like, look, if you want me to drive to Florida to talk after mall rides, you gotta pay for my gas, at least. One day, an agent was like, let me handle this for you. Yeah, we'll get you a little bit more than gas, dude. And I started actually getting paid to do it. So I got to the stand-up stage

through a very long convoluted process where, honestly it was Ralphie May at one point where he was, I was like, I can't do comedy clubs, man. You gotta, if I go to a comedy club, it ain't a comedian's audience that's gonna beat it. It's gonna be my audience showing up to see me. And Ralphie May was like, Kevin, it doesn't matter if it's your audience showing up to see you

in a comedy club. If you can fill a comedy club, you're a fucking comedian. He's like, Kevin, it doesn't matter if it's your audience showing up to see you in a comedy club. If you can fill a comedy club, you're a fucking comedian. He's like, don't worry, go do the clubs. And that was incredibly liberating because when you're doing theaters and shit, and this is gonna sound like first world problems, but when you're doing theaters,

you're doing like Carnegie Hall, that's a lot of seats to sell. Like a comedy club, 200, 300. Then it was like, suddenly in sales wise, wise I got to throttle down but in terms of content wise I got to get even more adventurous and sure oh my god so and then I wind up on stages doing a thing that I grew up watching people doing never once thinking oh I can do that like I wasn't the kid in high school that was or even grade, who was like the class clown or funny or anything like that. You know, I was witty and I could write shit.

But I got to wind up being a stand-up artist in this life without shooting for it. But it came as a back door from movies, which sounds exactly as sexy as I meant it. Yeah, but isn't that amazing to think that, like, Carlin backed into stand-up but wanted to be an actor, and then you. And the only reason I do what I do is because of him.

Growing up, listening to his albums, and watching his HBO specials, seeing a guy be erudite, but when I was a kid, it wasn't even so much that. Like when you're a kid, you come for the cursing, right? It's like, oh, he fucking curses. Cocks like a motherfucker tootsie. Yes, exactly.

But when you listen to the albums over and over again, or watch the specials over and over again in order to learn them Do them on the playground or whatever what sticks to the is how wisdom the motherfucker is even at a young age You're like this guy's smart. He's common sense thinking I think I got smarter listening to George Carlin Oh for sure as a kid and so he was the gift that kept on giving motherfucker never sat me down as though you should do what I do. And probably because he never could conceive of it. Like, you know, he knew me as one guy.

He knew me as the guy that wrote Dogma and stuff like that. And he was never there for like a Q and A and stuff. I got to see him perform live though and many times across my life. But post Dogma, like me and Rock were on set with him one day and he goes, you know, I'm gonna be playing Caesar's Palace in Atlantic City in two months. He goes, you guys should go,

because we were talking about blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And he wanted us to go not because he was bragging, because he goes, I'll show you how to do my show for an afternoon crowd, because he was telling us about the subtle difference between like doing what he normally does and then doing it. Like a 4 p.m. And doing for Vegas Oh, yeah, I think city where he's like Kevin. They don't want to hear the smart shit

He goes they want to hear cocksucker motherfucker. Yes, they want to hear all the easy stuff They don't want to see your sharp observations. And so we're like no way There's no way you just do a normal show and he goes. Oh, I'll show you then so me and rock go to Caesar's Caesar's Palace in Atlantic City As me and my wife Jennifer like we've when we're early in our yeah We must have been married that I don't even know if we're married at that point It's right before we got married She's pregnant and then rock and his wife at that point Malak and we had like

Carlin Carlin goddesses booth like right up front So like I could have taken a Kleenex, balled it up, hurled it at his hip and shattered it. We were that close. So if you know Karlin, he's got this one bit he did later in his career. People I could do without, and it's like a list bit where he's just listing fucking randos,

and it's kind of fun. So it's like guys named Skip, the audience like ah, one of them is, you know, and it always fucking made me smile because I've been doing this shit my whole life. He goes, guys over the age of 12 who wear their baseball caps backwards. So my whole life I've been listening to that bit going like,

oh, I feel seen and shit. So we go to watch him and he does that bit as part of the routine. Because it's not a, this is gonna alienate people, it's a general like, people suck and any audience could enjoy that. So there's me and Roc sitting there and next to our wives and George is doing his bit and he starts it.

And when he starts it, I was like, oh shit, like I'm gonna be in the room for baseball cap. And so he's going through the routine and he doesn't even look at us. He just goes another person I could do without Kevin you're exempt from this guys over the age of 12 who wear their baseball caps backwards and nobody in the room knew who I was and shit like that nor If even if they saw me sitting there, it's not like he's fucking famous Like I was still if you knew art films you Knew clerks and chasing Amy or if you saw the mall rats at home video Maybe you knew who I was maybe bill like oh that looks like silent Bob

But it wasn't like everybody was like all the celebrated fucking Kevin Smith, but Chris Rock was sitting next to me and he goes He knows your name I was like oh my god. You're right. It was a pretty highlight moment for me. That's amazing. It was cool. I mean, to skip through that in the show, because you know what's so funny about that? When we talk about that as a comic,

you could say stuff, most audiences never heard it. They never even knew it happened. It's almost like, it's like passing cars. It's like, oh, that car was blue. You're like, was it? They don't even hear it. So what's funny is it's just for you and how great that he gave you that little nugget and

cruise so fast beyond it. You will hold it forever. No one else knew. That's amazing. It was, and it was one of those things where it's like, you don't have to do that. But he knew I was sitting right there and he wasn't doing it to like, this is going to soften the blow because it's going to hurt Kev. Like I'm thin skinned but I'm not that thin skinned.

But he knew me as like fucking, not only is the guy who was with the backwards baseball cap movies but at that point i gravitated to wearing it in real life as well right so i'm sitting in the audience with my backwards baseball cap for him to casually toss it off i just uh... it felt very affectionate servers why he he's uh... and and alleged into degree i can explain if i don't talk about it all just go blah blah blah in here we pour whiskey hey man we've all been there your parlays one leg away that's all you need in a relief pitcher gives up a walk-off home run in the ninth

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When I used to create sites back in the old days when I first started touring and doing C and D level rooms to 19 people who didn't want to be there, there was no website to be had. It was the olden days. But now you can create a beautiful website that has so much technology built in thanks to Squarespace. It's unbelievable. I mean it's ridiculous. Cutting-edge design. They also have SEO tools that get you discovered faster and you show up more often. And also they have a video space on

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10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using that code whiskey. Okay? Squarespace.com. That code is whiskey. Save yourself 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Ginger. I like gingers. Tell me this. Jason Lee you said very quickly. You kind of went in and out. I like ginger. I like ginger. Tell me this. Yeah. Jason Lee, you said very quickly, you kind of went in and out.

Do you give yourself credit for a lot of the findings of Jason Lee? You know, not credit, but I was smart enough to cast him. I give credit for Jason Lee. Technically, honestly, Jason Lee deserves a credit, and here's why. So Jason Lee is dating Marissa Robisi, who is the red-headed, curly-haired chick in Days of Confused.

Could be your sister in the orchestra. Dude, you write it, I'll do it. Now that I see it, I can fucking, you and Marissa Robisi get Vani in there as well. Come on, man. So Marissa Robici is dating Jason Lee while they're making Dazed and Confused. Marissa Robici is the sister of Vani Robici,

another fine actor from Avatar and movies like that and shit. Better movies, and I'm not saying Avatar's bad, but he's fucking great at it, Vani. He just also is in a mainstream movie as well from time to time. His mom, Gay Robici, is a manager in the business. She manages those two kids' careers, she manages other people's careers.

So we're casting this movie, and our casting, mall rats, and our casting director is a guy named Don Phillips. Don Phillips had cast Fast Times to Ridgemont High, so he discovered Sean Penn. He also cast Daisy Confuse, so he discovered Matthew McConaughey. Good God. I mean, Richard, I think, was like,

you should look at this guy, but regardless, he's the guy, he's the casting director, he gets the cred. So on this movie, we're seeing all of Young Hollywood come in, and then one day, Don Phillips goes to me and Scott, he goes, he goes, Gay Robisi, the manager,

he's gone, she got somebody she wants to send in. I was like, great. And he's like, he's never acted before. I was like, get out of here. He goes, he was a professional skateboarder, but he wants to act. And I was like, and? And he goes, well, it might be a waste of your time.

And I was like, my whole first movie, nobody's a professional. Like, yeah, man, like, worse it could be. It could be terrible. Bring him in. Let's see. So Jason Lee came in, and all the guys auditioned with a TS monologue or a TS scene that was in the movie and cut. It was in the 15- cut, it was in the 15 year anniversary,

the cut opening of the sequence took place on the rooftop and shit. Whole opening the movie we wound up cutting off. So all the guys auditioned for TS using those lines and all the girls auditioned using the brandy lines from that scene. So Jason came in and like I remember he was like, he was a fucking kid, but I was a kid too,

but he was even younger than me. So he's real earnest, like because of the movies you think like oh my god, he's like Jason Mews, like funny as fuck, but Jason Lee's a pretty earnest guy. So he comes in and I was like, so they tell me you're a skateboarder, you know, I'm looking for anything to talk to him about and shit. And he goes yeah.

He goes, but I retired. And I was like skateboarder. You know, I'm looking for anything to talk to him about and shit. And he goes, yeah. He goes, but I retired. And I was like, oh, because you know, skateboarding to me is a way to get from a place to place. And I knew like there were people that ollied things. But I didn't know you could make a living from it, right? So he goes, but I'm retired. I goes, oh, I say you can retire from skateboarding. He looks up so serious as a heart attack.

Not shitty, but just like, oh, I gotta fuckin'. Inform you? Yeah, I gotta disabuse you of your ignorance. He goes, well, I was skateboarding at a professional level for nine years. And I was like, oh, I didn't know that was a thing. So he read, and there was,

honestly, he was like not, he was fine. It wasn't like my God, I could see the future. But we had such a good time talking to him because he was a real person. And unlike every actor who came in kind of like sparkle and nearly sparkle, he came in like a human being who was just like, I think acting would be fun. Like Citizen Kane, I think it would be fun

to run a newspaper, you know. So it was kind of charming. So after he comes in, Don Phillips goes, what do you think? I was like, I don't think he's right for the movie, but bring him back, he's a nice guy. And he's like, it'll be good for him if he gets to come back, because he's never auditioned before.

And I was like, yeah, by all means, bring him back. We like talking to him. So he came back, when he came back, instead of reading T.S., we had him read Brody lines. We were like, he ain't a TS, but maybe he could be Brody. And we didn't think he was gonna be him, because we had seen a guy earlier, day one of auditions, who we were like,

that's fucking Brody. Who was it, do you remember? I do, and I don't know his name, he's, it's not like, and that guy is Leonardo, on the camera, yeah it is. you know, J fucking Toby McGuire. But he wasn't a movie. Like I saw him on the big screen, and that's how I knew him when we had him to the audition.

He was in Speed. He was somebody who was on the bus in Speed, so when he came in we were like, you were in fucking Speed. And he was crushing the audition. So we were like, this guy's gonna be Brody. So Jason Lee Lee even though we brought him back and we let him read for Brody. There was no inclination like here's our guy When he's reading the lines There was a scene also cut from the movie, but it's in the cutscenes You could see it on the DVD if you have it still physical media

He has a line, Brody, where he refers to, he's in front of Svenning's house and he pretends he's his neighbor, and he's like, oh, he's giving the reporter gossip about Jared Svenning's house, Michael Roker, and he goes, the line is something like, I even heard they had a black mass there. And his pronunciation of black mass was so charming to me.

He held it out like a sheep. He was like, black mass. He goes, they even had a black mass there. And it was him holding out those A's like, bah. I was like that. It made me laugh out loud. And not at him, but I was like, that's funny. Like, you know, what a choice. Acting is a job of choices. That's all it is. that's funny like you know what a choice acting is a job of choices

That's all it is. It's not like motherfuckers born with talent. No an actor makes a choice They choose how to deliver a line the choice makes that line believable. That's what makes an actor convincing He made a fucking choice Nobody else would make worked, and I don't know if it was a choice or if that's how nobody else would make. Worked. And I don't know if it was a choice or if that's how he says black and mass. Did he just say it weird?

He's like, that's just how I say it, man. But for me, I'm like, that's interesting. And so we kept bringing Jason back. Like Don Phillips would be like, do you think he'll be in? I said, I don't think he's right for anything. But bring him back. He's a nice guy. He made it all the way to the final round

where Don Phillips did this thing called the pizza party where he had multiple people who were up for the same role come on the Same day and he round robin'd everybody it's something that like I'd never odd You know cast movies before other than clerks, which we did low-budge So I thought oh this must be the way they do it in Hollywood ever since then I've heard from people like that was the worst auditioning experience in my life Like you made me sit in a room with somebody else who was up for the same fucking part. I was like, I didn't do shit, man.

I was like, that was Don Phillips. They told me that's how they did under Dazing Fuse. And people were like, and I hated it then. So he came to the pizza party more as a stalking horse. Like, we needed three choices. We had a guy that we liked and we all thought was gonna be Brody. So it's like, we gotta bring two other people.

Bring Jason Lee. It'll be good for him because he's trying to establish himself and fucking his first movie audition route, he gets all the way to the last round. So we were framing it as a favor to him, even though technically it's like, well we need bodies in there. Even though we got the guy we think we like.

And the strangest thing happened, I'd never seen it before but I hadn't done it before. But I've never seen it since. You know, in hockey, there's an expression, the game is on your stick. Game is on my man's stick. All he had to do is sweep it in to the fucking net. And the goalie wasn't even there. Yours to lose.

And he did. Like over the course of the, like him doing the scene, it wasn't the same guy who was killing it in the room. So much so that I did a thing that I've never done since. Where at one point, three hours into the day, I pulled him aside and I was like, I don't know how to say this, but you're losing it. Which is the worst fucking thing to say to somebody that's doing it,, I don't know how to say this, but you're losing it. Which is the worst fucking thing

to say to somebody that's doing it, but I didn't know what to do. I was like- Just start cleaning the gun like, really? Okay. Exactly. And like in retrospect, but I was like, I was scared for him more for me

because I was like, all my hopes are pinned on you. Like, fuck it. Like, so you got to show them what you showed us. And it never came back. It was a weird phenomenon that to this day, I feel like I feel bad for the kid. However, Jason Lee not even going like, well, here's my chance, just kept black massing it.

Just steady as you go. And like slow and steady won the race. By the end of the day, even the studio people from Universal were like, who is that guy? He's pretty funny. And so Don Phillips, and when the pizza party was done, the people who were left still in the hallways and shit like that, everyone waiting to find out.

And so Don Phillips goes, what do we think for Brody? And I was like, I think it's Jason Lee. I was like, everyone thought he was funny, he's playing. And he goes, if you wanna do it, he's never done anything before. I was like, black man. He goes, I know you love it. No, black mass, I know.

So he goes, you wanna tell him or you want me to tell him? And I was like, what does one do? And he goes, I mean, I'm happy to tell him. He's going, but you could change somebody's life. Have you ever changed somebody's life before? And I was like, no. And he goes, well, why don't you deliver the news? Just to watch his face.

And I was like, all right, fucking yeah, yeah. Bring him into the office. So Jason comes in. He didn't, it was called the pizza party because they literally brought pizza. All the actors, nobody touched the pizza because they were like, I hate this. Yeah, I'm not gonna eat?

Yeah, they were fucking nervous as shit. So Jason Lee didn't eat any pizza, but I guess by the end of the day, he was hungry as fuck and he got himself, in my memory it's a Whopper, he remembers it as Carl's Jr. I don't even know if they existed in 95. Gotta do the math on that.

He can look it up. Did they exist? When Jason tells the story, he goes, Carl's Jr. I was like, I remember it being a Whopperopper but regardless he came in with a bag of fast food and Sat down the chair and he was like do you mind if I eat? I'm really hungry and I was like, oh my god Eat away. Go ahead Was there Carl's jr. I was in your open in 1941 Yep, Carl's jr. Is also hard right there owned by the same company listen to this fucking and let me tell you

I'm like, I don't even know if they existed that they're like we predate you We existed before you by the way do you remember your father ate a burger from us before he fucked your mother? That's who we are while he was fucking your mother One of our burgers was riding your mother's sweet ass, and he was eating a Hardee's I talked about the kid from speed Yeah, what is it? I do have the dog people in speed don't say no, but we'll talk about it out But anybody could do their homework. Yes, make them work for no, but I wanted him to fight it for us All right. We'll talk about it later So he's eating that bird. He's eating. He's eating a Carl's Carl's junior cop to it. Yeah, he knows I tried to least blame to him

I was like, no, it was a whopper. He's like, it was Carl's Jr. Whopper does sound better, by the way. I was trying to get Burger King to buy me. You're a storyteller. And I was trying to get Burger King to give us money. That's right, give us some money. So you know what? Whoever wants to give us money, that's the burger.

That's the burger, dude. So he's eating his Carl's Jr. He's like, would you mind if I eat? I was like, eat away. So he's like, and I was like, well, you're it, man. We want you to play Brody. And this was his reaction. He's like, yeah. And just went back to eating his burger. That's how I changed his life. He wanted one look up, but then right. He was so hungry right back.

Is that right? Cool. Yeah. Almost honestly, like I, I've Yeah, almost is honestly like I I've How to express Jason Lee is beyond talented and talent out But you're literally talking about a guy who was like they could be fun to be an actor. Yeah as a second career After he was like they could be fun to be a professional skateboarder my fucker can manifest. Yeah, he did it. Know what I'm saying? He should be playing lottery numbers. Or he should be picking them and giving them to me. Give me the reasoning for a number.

I think you might know the question I'm going to ask. Why 37 dicks? What a beautiful question. I don't get to answer this nearly enough. Because in the beginning, people would ask. And then when I give them the answer in the early 90s, people were sad that they asked. Because you couldn't really talk like this back then.

My ex-girlfriend, my high school girlfriend, who I'm still dear friends with, had a list of people she had sex with. It was me and somebody else and that was it. Right. But the list of people she had blown was far larger. So two versus 12. And I was always like, 12.

12. Like, my God. And she was Catholic like me and shit like that. Pretty, like, you know, just, that was the Catholic way. It's like, well, I'm not gonna fuck, but. Yeah, but I'll blow you dude So when I was writing the number I like I was like well 12 is too close to home So let me it's got to be ridiculous number like it's got to be something that would make your hair blow back

So I'm gonna at least fucking double it and so I wrote 24 and I was like I don't know that ain't funny It's a round number. It's two round of a number. Yeah, and so I was like well three times that and so three times It was like 36 and then I was like 37 so I just added one more just to be like, oh my god The ridiculous 40 would have been like this ain't true, right? Correct, but 37 felt now for 1994 37 felt unreasonable, unrealistic, and the height of comedy. Because unless you were getting paid to blow for a living,

who would ever blow that many people? I remember fucking showing this movie within the last five years, and in a Q&A, somebody was like, why do you think 37 blowjobs is a lot? And I was like, where were, oh my God, I missed my fucking generation. Holy shit, are you serious? Like, I was told that was were, oh my god, I missed my fucking generation. Holy shit, are you serious? Like I was told that was a shockingly low number.

Well, you're in the generation of OnlyFans, man. This is a different world now, dude. You know, his 25 year olds, it's a different world, dude. I guess it's all blowies these days. But we used to say that so common, like our friends would say that all the time. I mean, the common phrase was when someone would get out of somebody's car and we were meeting someone somewhere, we'd always be like, try not to suck any dick

while walking to the park. And we'd scream it out to our friends. And then just because we'd be driving away and they'd have to be there with it. That's from a movie and everyone around is like, what the fuck were they talking about? And you're like, nothing dude. Even if you drop that quote today,

the percentage of people who are gonna know it, minimal. Then, it's not like anyone heard it, it was like, hey, that's clerks. Most people just hearing that are like, you guys are animals. I mean, our pig friends, I mean, our little clique of pigs knew, everybody knew, and we said it all the time,

but 37 was the number that, as a joke, we always talked about that of like do 37 37 is so many dicks and it was it's the number for years I wore hockey jerseys and I wore the copper and the blue but with my own insignias and then I moved to Chicago alt Jersey colors which black and red and the number on all of them has always been 37. 37 was a fucking crazy lucky number for me. Mercifully, it doesn't play for everybody like oh what a quaint time, 37. There's still some people who are like it's pretty high.

And that gives me hope for the future. Yeah, like we're gonna work out. Well as a father I'm sure you're like ah, is it bad? I remember she saw like Clark's for the future. Yeah, like we're gonna work out. Well, as a father, I'm sure you're like, ah, is it bad? I remember she saw like Clark's for the first time when she was 18, 19 or something like that. And I was like, what'd you think? She was like, you know, for years,

people have been saying like, your father means something to me and I never understood why. And she's gone, I kind of get it now. She's gone, that was a cool movie. And I was like, fucking thanks. That's an amazing moment though. Pretty sweet.

Like that's cool that, like I have friends that have this moment with their kids, especially because your kid, your kid, I say kid, she's not a kid, but- She's 26, but still- Your daughter- She'll forever be my kid. Yes, but your daughter is a successful actor in her own right and works in the-

She would question your use of the term successful. Well, really? She's real hard on herself. Oh my God, I feel bad for her. What is success even? I mean, because it's such a subjective bullshit term anyway. Here's how I gauge success. You wanted to be an actor and you wanted to work

with one of your favorite directors and it ain't me. It was Quentin Tarantino and you did it. That's it, dude. You're there. Keep going, but you won. With me, it was likeentin Tarantino and you did it. That's it, dude. You're there. Keep going, but you won. With me, it was like none of this. I didn't dream of any of this. I just wanted to make clerks.

So I won, for me, a long time ago. Everything else has just been gravy. No life plan, everything else has just been like, oh, I get to do this now, oh, I get to do this now. And it helps it like it's never lost its luster. You know, we tend to silo off and I'm no different. Like I like being at my house and I don't like going places and shit.

But then like, oh, I get to go out and talk about myself. And all right, fucking, wait, there's whiskey involved? All right, let's fucking. So it's the gift that keeps on fucking given, man. Like I'm so, you know, it sounds ridiculous to say, but like so glad I made that movie, the first one, all of them particularly, but like the first one, because it was kind of like a calling card.

It was like, hi, my name's Kevin Smith. I wanna talk to you for the rest of my life. And it was the way to do it. It was the way to introduce myself without feeling desperate. Like if you watch old interviews with Kevin Smith, he was so laid back, cool, it's almost sickening. I can't stand it and shit. Like he can't be bothered.

Everything hurts so much. He's just like, can't believe I'm doing press. But meanwhile, it's like, old Kevin Smith is like, I can't believe anyone wants to talk to you, you asshole and shit. You don't even know how to fucking present entertainingly yet and shit. So it's been a weird, long career, I can't believe anyone wants to talk to you, you asshole and shit. You don't even know how to fucking present entertainingly yet and shit. So it's been a weird long career that I wasn't prepared for.

But then there are cool moments where it's just like, oh, I'm gonna go to a place and talk about myself for a while. Like that still does it for me. And then being able to make a thing. This is an instance where I'm out there talking about a thing I didn't make. So I don't have to educate people on it.

I don't have to be like, well, it's called the 430 movie and I made it and I shot it my movie theater And it's kind of the story of like how I first fell in love with film This is like hey, man remember dogma like fuck Yeah, that was like when Fight Club came out you get credit for movies You didn't even make right because people like that's the same year's Fight Club of Matrix You know like yes, right, and I didn't make either of those But I'm happy to be in the same company. If you feel good about it,

I can tell by your energy that that's a good thing. But now the re-release of Dogma though. I don't have Matrix around me. I don't have Fight Club, so I'm fucked this time. What do you have now? What's around you now? What does it come out? Oddly enough, Ben Affleck.

Affleck is in a movie called The Accountant Two in theaters right now. And this comes out? This comes out next week on June 5th. So old Ben Affleck and young Ben Affleck are finally going to battle at the box office. We hope the young one wins. I do.

I hope the young one wins. Fuck yeah. I think the Accountant's had its time. One and two. In here, we pour whiskey. Hey, here to tell you about Lightstrike. I don't know if you've seen this or you've heard of it, but this is an excellent source of 5% alcohol.

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summer movie but here we are coming out in June. Like- You guys were a Thanksgiving release, basically? Isn't that nuts? That's really weird. Yes, in advance of Thanksgiving, let me tell you some inside art from back in the day. I don't think it matters anymore. It was, they put it in theaters,

I think it was like November 13th, I believe it opened, because they knew if it was in theaters for two weeks when Thanksgiving happened, it would get the Thanksgiving bump. Yeah, isn't amazing like Thanksgiving traditionally, there's always a bump at the box office and There are many theories as to why that happens people like oh you're home with your relatives and fucking people like let's go to the movies There's a family, but the most dominant theory is like people hate their fucking family theory is like people hate their fucking family so much. I can relate to them without having to relate to them. I can sit in a room with them, be with them without having to talk to them.

But there is always a box office bump, so we did enjoy a third week box office bump on Dogma because of Thanksgiving. It ended up doing very well in the box office. 30 million, which is like, well look. What, in the year of its release? That's huge. Yeah, well a hundred at that time. What, in the year of its release? That's huge. Well, 100 would've been huge. Wow. Especially because Pulp Fiction did 100. And Pulp Fiction, and most people in the audience go, but you didn't make Pulp Fiction. I'm like, I know, I know.

But Pulp Fiction, I never would've thought about making a movie that ever made 100 million, let alone, you know, I was shocked. I made a movie that made two bucks and shit. But Pulp Fiction making 100 million gave all of us indie filmmakers hope because it was like, holy shit Yeah, like you could make something that off the beaten path and it could do business

It could cross over into a multiplex right like maybe anything's possible. So going into dogma there was like, oh my god Could we make that we didn't but 30 million was like that's high-end for Kevin Smith Dogma and James Allen Bob strike back both topped off at 30 million. So it feels like I had a 30 million was like, that's high end for Kevin Smith. Dogma and James Salababstreg back, both topped off at 30 million. So it feels like I had a $30 million. You're the $30 million man. You know what I'm saying? That's the name of this episode.

We can rebuild him. Well, I wanna say this to you before, I mean, there's so many things I wanna say to you. Say them all. Well, first of all, shout out to the Jinko jean shorts that you were wearing when you came in, he was rocking Jinkos and you know what's really strange? I said like myself

Straight out the 90 straight out the 90 well this young lad here my my little boy McCone He's just that song from child my little boy Will be a man one day like me we hope but his generation now loves jinkos And I was like they came fucking back! It's crazy! But y'all like them too long for my taste. I like them knee-length, and when I stand, they just cover my knees. Because I got my mom's child-bearing hips and fat thighs. So for years, I've always been interested in elephant-trunk shorts, because they come down enough to cover that shit.

I, conversely, have tremendous calves. You do have nice calves. Thank you. And I can tell you why you have nice calves. Tell me. Because ever. You do have nice calves. Thank you. And I can tell you why you have nice calves. Tell me. Because I see you hiking all the time. Well, that's part of it, but also I had them even before I hiked.

It was because I had to hoist a very large carriage for most of my life. So the thighs retain fat cells and they just get chubby and shit. But my calves, man, always looked good. So I've always wanted shorts that covered everything else but that. But the calves? So it was like good. So I've always wanted shorts that covered everything else but that.

But the calves? So it was like, you know, a kilt would've done it, or a dress, but Jinko particularly worked out for me. So over the years, Jinko's come and gone in terms of somebody revives it and stuff like that. And every time it comes under new ownership, I rush to the website to be like, all right, man, I need 13 inch.

But they commit more to 15 and then almost 17 Which is like, you know might as well be pants at that point So I have bought jinkos and brought them to tailors and been like, can you take off two inches, please? Bring them up. They don't work. It doesn't look right Like it looks like you're wearing bell-bottom jorts or something like that. They flare out So this pair the old reliable man I've had it for so fucking long. And I was saying before we started,

because I got my mom's like heavy thighs, the inside of your thighs go like this and you lose pants and shorts a lot quicker even if you're wearing denim. Fuck, that's why I can't wear corduroy. I learned that as a kid. I hate corduroy. Well, number one, the vrt vrt,

but number two, it's like that shit fucking fades quick between chubby thighs and shit. But this shows you how strong Jinkos are. And denim, I'm still, like there's no, like oh my god. Yeah, there's no like I'm gonna have to give them up. I have to start making plans for what's next. I'll put patches inside or whatever

because I've done that with some clothes. But there's Jinkos, man. They've lasted. Can I propose that you buy Jinko? Oh, the company. Why wouldn't you try? Because they keep going in and out like right they do. Who owns them now? Look up who owns Jinko because I remember they were they were revitalized by a larger company and then they sold them and they stopped selling

them and they started selling them again. Someone like Kevin Smith needs to buy Jinko. You know you know who'd be more successful with it? John Cena. Also a certified Jorts wearer from what I understand. He's a big Jorts dog. You know, you know who'd be more successful with it? John Cena, also a certified Jorts wearer from what I understand. He's a big Jorts dog. I shot a movie with him. I lived my dream. I shot a movie with him and Pete Fairley.

Fuck, which one? I shot a movie called Ricky Stinnicky, me, him and Zac Efron down in Australia. It was on Amazon. I was gonna say, I think I saw that title. We never hit the theaters. Yeah, we never hit the theaters.

Who's in it? Me, Cena and Zac Efron. How was that? It was fucking amazing. I mean, it was a dream come true. Where'd you shoot it? In Australia. And so you got to-ron. How was that? It was fucking amazing. It was a dream come true. Where'd you shoot it? In Australia. So you got to...

Melbourne. For how long? We were there for two and a half months. You must have blended in. Oh, there's a land of white people in there. Yeah, oranga. You're one of us. Look at the oranga, mate.

Is that what they said? Yeah, they call you orangutan. That's what they call you? Yeah, they call you the orangas. No, but we shot, I shot with Fairly, like you said about your daughter with Tarantino as a kid were you big something about Mary fan Fairly's the Fairly brothers made everything that I ever loved I mean everything I ever loved and so and I like Pete more than Bobby kidding but Pete no no but deep cuts no no but but working with Pete was like that was the thing what you said

about your daughter when when anybody asked me they're like what do you want to do in your career whatever I'm like I like, I hope I get to keep doing it, but if I got to check out now, it was spread. You were like, when you get up there, when at the pearly gates, Wherever it is. Before they judge, before they do anything, I like to think when they get there, they're like,

how was it? Like pretty fucking cool. If you get your moment, to yelp it up and be like, mid, two stars, or whatever the fuck. But, you know, it could've been better and here's how. But to be up there and be like, are you fucking kidding me? I got to work with fucking one of the Farrelly brothers,

the one I like. And this guy. I couldn't have been happier. It was incredible. And when you write the next iteration of Archie and you put me in it, I'm very excited for that. Bro, you want me in a Kevin Smith movie. I'm not even kidding. Say less.

It's so easy, you just have to be there when it happens. I'll be here. Just make it happen. Be local. Tell me, who owns Jinko? The original owner reacquired it in 2019, Milo Riva. Damn it. Are you serious?

That's romantic though. He bought it back. I know, it's beautiful. Awesome. Yeah, but that hurts my heart a little bit because now you're definitely not going to get it. I don't need it. But what I do need is to get in touch with them and be like bro 13 inches is a sweet spot

Say the name say the name of the gentleman Milo Riva let's put it out there shout out to Milo Riva if you're listening which let's tag Tag as many people can find Milo Riva that Kevin really needs the continuation of the 13 inch also easy to work with Licensing agreements in the pits, like cost nothing to do a Kevin Smith, Jinko line. Let's do the collab. In one of the incarnations of Jinko, they did, I had, they sent me protos of Kevin Smith jorts.

When it had the silent Bob Hawks logo, I used to wear on my jersey all the time, on the jean pocket and stuff. So they, you know, unfortunately they were too big They don't fit anymore in shit before it for a red hot minute. It was gonna exist. So Jinko can we make this happen again? Let's put that there. That's it dude. Let's let's shake this back into reality Please fans at home like you I mean I know seen as like well We'll make well more way more well-known.

And if you do a John Cena line, naturally, fucking, you'll be selling to like all the wrestling crowd. But there are some, there are a few middle-aged men still around who will commit to a life in jorts, but don't make it good enough that, you know, they gotta rebuy every year. Otherwise, what's the fucking point? So why don't you make some disposable jinkas?

Yeah, yes. You know what I'm saying?y every year otherwise. What's the fucking point? So why don't you make some disposable jinkies? Yeah? Yes, you know like paper straws exactly make it so they wear out man Make it so they wear out I appreciate you so very much for coming on the show. I can be the world Having me bad we didn't whiskey it. No, that's okay. You're not a big whiskey guy. You told me before the show No, I don't drink at and not because I'm like, I'm trying to live sober or some shit. I've never liked the taste of booze, even in high school. So hard to go to high school keggers and shit, cause I was like.

Not even beer. No. Especially beer. What about a little bit of weed? Little bit of sweet? Back in the day, it was a huge fucking store. Yeah, but no, how long has that been gone out of your life? I went crazy two and a half years ago, so then.

Two and a half? Yeah, cause I went into this joint Sierra Tucson kids if you ever feel yourself slipping from the grasp of Reality or in need of mental health. I don't care how old you are race creed or color or or what gender you are for heaven's sakes Don't ever hesitate to ask for help. I did and that's the whole reason we're having this conversation right now So when I was in there I was in for a month and I was like, oh shit, I haven't smoked weed for a month. Like, let me see how long I can keep this going. So it was 15 years that I had been smoking weed and so I was like, let me try to keep going for another 15. I don't think I'm gonna make it

because when I started this journey, the world wasn't as fucked up as it is right now so if I was ever what a great place for an ad if I was ever going to Fall off the wagon it would be for this on June 6th Jeter we're doing a collab as the kids say Jeter Is doing the doughnut joint for National Doughnut Day and this year it is powered by Jeter is doing the donut joint for National Donut Day, and this year it is powered by J. and Silent Bob's Blunt Man's Chronic. That is the strain.

This is one of the most powerful joints on the planet. It has a resin stick in the middle that, as you smoke it, it looks like a donut. This is my gift to you. Oh my God, thank you, sir. This is amazing. We didn't whisk it. There's weed.

This is wonderful. I need both, I gotta be honest with you. Greens, sometime need greens. I need both. I do like both. Look at all this fucking whiskey you're like, it ain't enough. No, no, no, we I need both. I gotta be honest with you. Greens, sometime need greens. I need both. I do like both. Look at all this fucking whiskey you're like, it ain't enough. We do enjoy both. I mean, we do like to dabble a little bit, especially because... It's a good one. June 6th it comes out.

I think there's only like fucking 500 and then they sell out. June 6th it's gonna be out. We'll put the link in the description down below, by the way. And also... June 5th, Dog Munchin' Theaters everywhere. June 5th, get your ass to the theater. Do the right thing. Yeah. Right? Also, June 5th dog June 5th get your ass to the theater do the right thing. Yeah, right I say fucking if you're a whiskey ginger fan, you're like I want him in the next fucking movie and shit Yeah

If you want a place if you want this thing to come to the only new my next movie happens if people like the old Movie when we release it go see it get your ass out, please We end the episode the same way you look into that camera you say one word or one phrase Sometimes people did a phrase or imparting wisdom. Some people just want to say one word to end the episode whenever you're ready. Kids, your voice is your currency. Spend it across this life. And I don't mean just by going out and telling people like, here's my opinion about fucking Superman. You can spend time on the internet, that's fine, but don't waste your life on the internet. Let people know your story.

Your story is valuable and it's interesting. It's different from mine and different than his, different than hers and shit like that. So there's value to it. And I know a lot of people have bastardized this word and made it mean fucking something it don't, but I'm here to tell you right now, you're a fucking snowflake. I mean that in the best possible way because that means you're unique and different than everybody else. That uniquity

It's valuable. I've spent my life Using my voice so to speak your voice is this simple how you perceive the world and how you spit it back to the world How you translate the world and life back to the audience back to any audience back to even just somebody you're having a conversation with Your voice is your currency and we're all in this together, right? Like fucking nobody gave us a handbook so we don't know what's going on. We share information. That's how we proceed. That's how we move ahead.

And since you're a human being and I'm a human being, we share the human condition. But your journey has been incredibly different than mine. Snowflake is very different. So because of that, I can glean things that I haven't learned about my own life. So your story is valuable. It's worth something. Emerging artists always think about doing something that's been done before You know mimicking something that has had success you can try that it could work

But why not die on the cross of originality and tell them something they never heard before I walk into a room I say clerks 19. They're like fuck yet again You can walk into a room and tell them the thing they've been waiting to hear their whole fucking lives the reason they got into The movie business and film financing in the first place because they're like, I just wanna tell fucking amazing stories. You have an amazing story, you've lived an amazing story. Find a way to tell it, to share it with the world. And if you can monetize it, even better.

But if you can't, even if you're just doing it for free, you're interesting and you're beautiful and you're smart and you got something to say, man. Tell them who you are. Let this world know who you are before you leave it this best of all possible worlds And I don't mean by you know by gunning people down on your way out No by sharing your experience your journey and what you've learned man this You count you matter and we need that information that you got think about it man fucking we're all just diodes and some gigantic fucking program

You're just as important of this diode or whatever the fuck I am. So share that information. Share your story. In here, we pour whiskey. Whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey. Oh, that creature in the ginger beard. Sturdy and ginger. Like that. The ginger gene is a curse. Ginges are beautiful.

You owe me five dollars for the whiskey. Seventy-five dollars for the curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me five dollars for the whiskey and seventy-five dollars for the horse. Gingers? Oh hell no. This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.