Whiskey Ginger with Andrew Santino - Monty Franklin

Episode Date: November 22, 2024

Santino's down under! This episode was recorded on the road in the land of wallabys and kangas with Monty Franklin mate! ENJOY! Monty Franklin: Aussie comedian Monty Franklin brings a laid-back charm and razor-sharp wit to stages worldwide. Whether he's riffing on kangaroos, California, or the quirks of life down under, Monty’s hilarious storytelling and infectious energy make him an unforgettable act. Catch his laughs on stage, screen, or streaming—he’s everywhere you want comedy to be. #montyfranklin #andrewsantino #whiskeyginger #podcast #youmadeitweird ============================================ Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS SQUARESPACE Get that site up and running now! 10% off your order https://squarespace.com/whiskey BETTER HELP 10% OFF YOUR 1ST MONTH https://betterhelp.com/whiskey ======================================= Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast https://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria IG: @itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What up Whiskey Ginger fans? Welcome back to the show. If it's your first time joining the show, welcome to the show. Leave a comment down below for the Al Goh rhythm. Let people know. I'm down under. And my guest is Monty Franklin, a Australian comedian who's been masquerading as one of us living in the United States for a while. He's great, though.

And I'm still down under right now. I'm taking some time down. And next up is Singapore. If you're in Singapore, come see me and and Bobby Lee we're doing one show in Singapore one show only and go to badfriendspod.com badfriendspod.com then I return to the United States of America the good old US of A where I go to New Orleans, San Antonio and then it's Krimis and Kwanzaa. Then I go Chicago Theater, Durham, Atlanta, Charleston, Philly, New York, Phoenix, San Francisco, we added a show, San Diego, we added a show, Boston, we added a show, and

Minneapolis, we added another show. Go to AndrewSantino.com. Thank you guys for all your love. I appreciate you. Come out and see your boy, Santino.com. In here we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey. Do that creature in the ginger beard. Sturdy and ginger. Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse.

Gingers are beautiful. You owe me five dollars for the whiskey and seventy-five dollars for the horse. Gingers are hell no. This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whiskey Junior. My guest today is one of my favorite people on Earth. I say that for all my guests, but I mean it once again today.

We are Down Under with Monty fucking Franklin, mate. Down Under. Does that sound good? My accent's not bad. It's actually pretty good. When you did it on stage last night, I was like, alright, it's pretty good. You and Rob Schneider do a pretty good Australian accent.

You're comparing me to Schneidy? Yeah, you know, you're in the same category. You think me and Rob Schneider have the same accent ability? Yeah, you and one of the greatest comedic actors of all time, Rob Schneider, have a good Australian accent. All right. All right. I like Rob.

I'm just saying, you know, I've been working on it a lot. You know? Yeah. That's fine. I like Rob. I'm just saying, you know, I, I, I've been working on it a lot, you know? Yeah. That's fine. No big deal. You come right on the show and you insult me right away. I don't know. I'm not good enough. I thought it was, I'm not good enough for you. I thought it was a compliment. Yeah, I guess that's true. Kind of, but we don't want to be compared to anybody. Do you want to be compared to people? Sometimes.

Who, who do you want to be compared to? Michael Jordan. You never want you to see me play ball and you go, you know what you know who you remind me of your Michael Jordan, what are you doing over there? McCone is testing a little bit of white balance. We're in my hotel room here Why is there a yellow stain on it and a bit hard That came like that when we I got to the room, you know, these hotels come with those yeah, right we're broadcasting live from Australia with my boy, Monty Franklin down in Sydney right now.

We're doing a five city tour here in Australia. You were nice enough to do a spot for us last night in the ICC theater. How was that? You were nice enough to give me the spot. The place is unreal. Pretty cool. It's what?

It's an 8,000 seat venue. Doesn't it feel like it's like a perfect sort of three four hundred seater yeah I don't know about 400 but it feels it doesn't feel like 8,000 it doesn't feel like a chasm of a thing it is pretty impressive to see the one thing I'll note it and you're not from Sydney you're a Melbourne guy yeah the one you'll find about Australia and people get upset when I say this is Australia is just Australia if you're from Australia. Americans love to say I'm from Chicago or I'm from Boston. You guys are very

town-specific, but if we go overseas anywhere we're really first and foremost we're just Australians everywhere. Except when you go to Western Australia and Perth and they will want to distance themselves from the eastern side of the country. You'll see. They've done a good job. It's like 4,000 miles away. Yeah. Perth's the most secluded capital city on earth. I can't wait to go. I do want to go over there. I am excited for that. I know what you're saying though. We differentiate because Boston to Miami is dramatically different kinds of people.

It's amazing. You guys have... Yeah. It's all whites. It's pretty... It's mostly. You guys have... It's all white. It's mostly all white. It's mostly, yeah. Yeah, alright, yes. I was gonna try and defend us and then I just went, no, you know what? I noticed that last night. We talked about it. Doing like, for lack of a better word, racial comedy or like racial jokes, they get a little tight. Yeah. A little tight, which is funny because, and we said this, this was the my breakdown of it.

Because there's not enough, because you're not in brood with so many other cultures the way that America is, you know, like look, there's a lot of Asians down here and there's a lot of indigenous, right? Yeah. And there's a lot of indigenous, right? Look, there's not a lot of indigenous, not as many as like African Americans in America that are sort of... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So... You guys don't have that culture... We have a definite different historical racial history in this country. So when you talked about it last night and the kind of integration of black and white and the way that we bounce off jokes with each other and give each other's culture shit and stuff like that in America, that doesn't exist here. I know it's so what we do have that with is kind of with Italians and stuff like that.

And like, yeah, we call them wogs. And they'll call us skip skip was a kangaroo TV show when we grew up. So that's what the wogs will call the Australians what's a wog a wog is an Italian Greek what is the accolade for whoo you know what I tried to look that up once you know in America if you call an Italian a WOP WOP it stands for without papers that's the that's what I thought it was but wog look, it's not a derogatory term. WOGs will call themselves WOGs.

So that's not an insult? No. What does WOG stand for? He's going to Google it right now. The kid's on it. No. WOG is a racial slur used in British English to black and South Asian people and in Australian English

to people from the Mediterranean region. What does the acronym stand for? So it is racial, it's racially charged. Yeah, but it doesn't have the same connotations. Like Italian comedians I know do a big show called The Woggy Christmas and there's a movie called The Wog Boy, like they call each other wogs. It's kind of like how if a black guy says the N-word on an album. No, it's definitely not N-word, not even in the close realm that thing is so squeaky. I'm just said it like I've just said it like Four times on your podcast. I'm not gonna say it if well alright close to that whatever man my answer So he'll be pissed about it

It's unclear Yeah oriental gentleman, Western orientated gentleman working on government service or... Here's the deal. The fact that you don't know makes it immediately racist. Like you guys don't even fucking know. If you don't even know what it means, then clearly something's afoot. No, because we're so like cavalier with it and it's such a friendly thing that I didn't need to look into it and go, Oh, let's make sure this is okay. I just knew that it was all right. I get it. I get it. I get it, I get it. Well, it's funny because WAP, like I'm Italian,

but if somebody said WAP in this, you know what it is? Racial epithets are only good for the time that they really like sting somebody. Not all of them, but like WAP, if you called an Italian a WAP today, they're not even, it's not gonna hit the same. No. Yeah, 60 years ago, it might've been like, ah yeah, WAP, and they're like, yeah it's not gonna hit the same. No. Yeah. 60 years ago,

yeah, it might have been like, ah, yeah, WAP, and they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, and they might have started a fight. Yeah. If you said that to any member of my dad's side of my family, they'd be like, what? It's so outdated. It's not even like an insult anymore. Yeah. It is interesting. But so WAP is your, uh, WAP is your all encompassing non-racial racial identifier, but it's not racist. I don't think so. Phone in if I'm wrong. Yeah, leave it in the comments below. It's mostly Americans.

They don't know the difference. Everyone just let his guy's an idiot. But I did like to see how racial jokes played out here. It was kind of wild to watch, because I do know that the last time I was down in Australia, I did a show in Melbourne at that comic lounge. Comics lounge, yeah. And it was kind of the same vibe where there was like, we talked about this last night that like, people go, oh, do you change your jokes?

No, I don't change my material no matter where I go. I don't care. It's going to be the same. It's funny everywhere. Yeah. But there are certain references that we talked about last night that's like, they just don't know what that is. Yeah, but they give you the benefit of the doubt, and they think for a second in your head, and then they put it together and they go, oh, I see what that is. They give you a little bit of love, but the references are gone. So they're like, I don't even know what that means, but I think I know what it means. Like, well, you did a joke last night, and I don't want to do any of your jokes. I don't want to do any of my jokes. Yeah, trust me, I wouldn't either. But I saw, no, but you did one about Happy Birthday.

Yeah. And that's so funny, because that would do well in both America and Australia. It does much better here, because they grew. Yeah, but it's still funny there. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

We just don't have, the hook isn't as strong, because for Americans, because we don't know how much that meant to you, at singing Happy Birthday and the way you do it differently here But I found that with comedy over the last 20 years working in the industry for instance I know Chris Rock is a legend. I know he's comedies unreal, but you hate doesn't black just say it just say it No, just say it. He's a walk

What he's a legend and what? He's I the the jokes don't hit me at the same way that they hit you dude. I thought about the You know the the whole Bring back the pain that was his one was it bring the pain bring the pain. Yeah, I remember sitting there I'm polite Australian way bring back the pain bring back the pain That pain was all right more of that. Bring the pain.

Bring the pain. I remember watching it thinking, this is great. I get that this is awesome, but it wasn't hitting me like the same way that it would hit an American who grew up in that culture. Yeah, it just doesn't have the... I thought about that when we were talking the other night about like, great American comedians. And I was like, I wonder, especially someone like Chappelle or guys that are kind of polarizing in their approach in a great way where they talk about stuff that's so like,

inherently American issues. Yeah, I wonder if that even how how it lands here, you know, it lands in the way that we want to be part of that conversation and feel like we do, but we don't know it on the same level that you do. Right. You didn't grow up, you didn't see it growing up. You didn't see it. So you didn't, uh, you don't instantly relate your friend, blah, blah to the thing when, oh, cool. And you feel it at much deeper. We feel it on a, we're watching a movie and all this is America thing.

I understand America. You don't really, cause you weren't there. You didn't grow up with it all around you. But we grew up with it on TV and stuff. So we know enough of it to relate, but not enough that it's really ingrained in us. And we're like, got it. It doesn't really do the thing for you.

By the way, you revealed yourself last night as a true American. I, of course, revealed myself on stage. Yeah, as a true American. Yeah, he pulled his penis out like a true American. That's what we do when we come down. But you did something last night that I found is funny because I've known you for, I don't know, I'd like to say it's got to be 10 years now, right? At least. And you've lived in LA for, or you lived in America at least for long enough now where you've experienced both cultures so much that you kind of have a little bit

of American in you. What's the thing you miss the most about Australian culture? And what's the thing you you've found that you love the most about American culture that you're like, yeah, that's cool that they have that we don't have it and vice versa. There is a laid back nature here to people in general general and I think that's more so than Los Angeles you think yeah there is I like going into a random bakery here and there's a nice Australian like motherly woman there who's genuinely concerned about me. Like she goes, what are you?

And I go, oh, I live in LA. And she goes, oh, you be careful over there. Like actually cares about me. And that's a thing in Australia that I really, I do miss. I miss the culture of the people when they're caring for each other. Cause they can also be dickheads in turn on you pretty quick. I was gonna say, we saw that a lot last night too.

A lot of dickheads. There's a lot of dickheads here. A lot of dickheads. There's dickheads everywhere around the world, but there that a lot last night too. Yeah a lot of dickheads There's a lot of dickheads here. There's dickheads everywhere around the world But sure they were there was a lot at your show. You guys are the most fun dickheads though I will say that Australians are fucking fun. They don't take themselves that serious They know how to take a joke which I love yeah in America a lot of times people are quick to be Offended is not the right word, but they're quick to be off- be off put yeah and you're like let it go dude it's not real yeah it's all fake that's all a joke that's the laid-back that I'm talking about all right

right just we're all here having fun and there's a lot of that going on right all right what's the thing you found in America that you're like man I do really like this and we don't do that in Australia I tell you what Americans do that is good that we don't do here is you will build an individual up and encourage them to succeed at the highest level they can. For instance, you will build up a Tom Brady. My god, he's the goat. You love to build up someone. Right here, we cut people down. It's called tall poppy syndrome. So if you try and do something out of the grain, everyone goes, oh, look at this dickhead wearing a shirt that's not the same as all our other shirts. Oh, look at this dickhead trying to... So when I first started doing stand-up here,

my mates all cut me down as opposed to being supportive. We were in our early 20s and no one's ever supportive in their early 20s. We did the same thing in America. It's the exact same thing back home. Oh it is? Oh okay. Yeah, yeah, okay. So, but I do like that Americans will encourage individuals and talk them up, whereas here, you get shut down a lot. So unless you're Hugh Jackman, who's the king of the country, where everyone goes, it's Hugh, everyone else has to be the same. Well, how did he make it through that? How's he one of one? He's so good. Yeah, but so many people, there's got to be more same. Well, how did he make it through then? How's he one of one? He's so good. Yeah, but so many people,

there's gotta be more talented people here. Yeah, but they've all gotta go over to America. You think about it. Like the talent that stays here can only be capped at so much. And then, yeah, put it this way, Margot Robbie couldn't get work here. She had to go to America to become Barbie.

Margot Robbie, yeah. She's so good too. She's so great. Yeah, she's so talented. And you know, Chris Hemsworth and like all the all the Australians that go over and have the opportunity to excel in fucking Disneyland. Let's just that's what America is. The whole of America is Disneyland for us. Like you think, Oh my God, this glitz and glad and you do and you go there and it's big and everything's

there. It's so cliche, but there is opportunity everywhere. I mean, shit, you can build a podcast and sell out bloody arenas. Yeah, well, we're entrepreneurs. We promote entrepreneurial. That is like the number one American thing is like, hustling is what I love about that I see that. And I see it other places, but what I do love is

you go to a major metropolitan area, a big city. people are making money so many different ways yeah and it's kind of cool to watch yet no one has to do shit like go to New York so many people are making money so many different ways and it's a constant funneling of economy and whether or not you like that depends on if you're a capitalist or not but I think it's fucking great because people have the opportunity without having all of the resources to still make money. You don't have to be a brilliant person to make a lot of money in America. You don't even have to be fucking educated. You can find a way to make money in the slot that you're good at. That's what I find to be cool. Whenever I go to big

cities in America, I'm always like, isn't this crazy how many people are making money hustling a million different ways? I always think that. I look at stores and stuff and I'm like like there is so many different things See, we don't have the population here. We've got a population of California in the whole country. No shit. Yeah So what's California is what 29 million? Yeah, and that's what Australia is Wow Yeah, and so you think about and you've been here. There's there's Melbourne Sydney and Brisbane and then Perth and then there's nothing I mean Yeah, but they're small the population's show it to Adelaida. You know, I like you very much

Killing your own show We're 38 I thought we're only 30 million Wow, there you go So you think about if you were here and all you could do in America is just to around California, which is actually kind of viable. You could actually do that. You could actually do that. Yeah.

But that is the cap of what you can do in this country. So if you're a comedian touring around, you got you got a few major cities, whereas you could literally tour around Florida for the whole year. And there is enough work to sustain 50 weeks of comedy. You could do it I don't know if you'd want to do it forever you'd probably want to spread your wings but there's a guy do you know Bob Marley is you know who that is? Not yeah man not that Bob Marley. No I don't know who you're talking about. Bob Marley for people that don't know is a very very famous comedian in our world

who's been around for I don't know 40 around for, I don't know, 40 some odd years, I don't even know now. But he specifically only tours, from what I know, I could be being ignorant, but in the Northeast, part of the country, right? Like he stays around the New England, New York, he stays in the Northeast and he is the king out there. And he sells out. Does the few would do that?

Would you say David Tell would do the same thing? No, Tell's everywhere, man. Tell's all over the place. Tell just bases out of New York and because the East Coast is so condensed, you can make a lot of money touring around just the East Coast. Right. You can do. There's a million spots to get to that are easy. But because we live on the stupid West Coast, like idiots,

it takes us forever to get anywhere. So we don't you can't. Between California and the middle of the in the Midwest. You know, how many shows are in fucking Colorado and that's it Montana can't do the Dakotas. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like there's not not enough to sustain but there's guys like Bob Marley who make who just want to plant over there and they can Do it, but I know what you mean every Australian. I know they all say the same thing Is that once you've gotten some momentum here?

you've got to get out like you have to go to America and if you want to do bigger things, otherwise you comfortable here doing a nice radio show and you've got a little bit of a presence and a bit of money in the bank and you're happy and content and Nothing wrong with that. Yeah, but if you've got aspirations, I've always wanted to make a movie. That's all I've ever wanted to do since I was a kid. You're making one, we talked about it. We're not gonna give it away, but you're making one. I am.

It's taken this long, but it took me, I had to go to America to do it on the scale that I wanted to do it and get the people involved that I wanna do it. Like, you just can't do it that from here. So. Isn't that the irony that I came down here to shoot a movie?

I know. It's like you fucking, you make it in America only so you can leave to shoot movies everywhere else. Vancouver, Budapest, here. I fucking, I don't do anything in America anymore. I mean that's a huge, that's a whole other issue. But what's funny is, you know, like I found that everyone that I've met that has come from Australia, oh actually, side note note do you guys claim Mel Gibson or no? I do. He is. I do well he was born in America but then raised

in Australia. Right. So and if you look back at a film called Gallipoli he has a thick Australian accent in that. Gallipoli? Yeah. Do you know this movie? I gotta look this up Gallipoli. Gallipoli it's about a young guy in this movie obviously like World War. Yeah yeah yeah. 20s or. Gallipoli. Gallipoli, it's about... He's a young guy in this movie, obviously? World War I. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 20s or something? Yeah, it's World War I. And it's about these two sprinters that go and work as runners to relay messages on the battlefield, right? And so it's him and his mate, and yeah, it's obviously a tragic war story and stuff, but

he's full Australian in it. Outside of all the death and outside of the horrific death of nature. It's a great film. Fantastic movie. Mel Gibson in Gallipoli. Yeah, we claimed Mel Gibson as ours until the incident. Yeah. The what was it? Sugar Tits? The Sugar Tits Jew Cop thing, whatever. Then we gave him back to you. We like, no, no, he's Australian. Yeah. Well, we did that a little bit with Russell Crowe too

Because he's he was born in New Zealand, but then raised here right here now. Yes. Yeah, I went to his house Yeah, did you really crazy story that will never tell? We've actually told it on the podcast on bad friends a few times, but we've taken it out every time really yeah I don't need it Crazy about a crazy weird wild night of like. You'll be telling me that afterwards. He's a polar, yeah, 100%. He's a polarizing guy, I will say that.

That's not negative or positive. He is very much, you know back in the day when someone would be like, a star walks in the room, you knew that that was a movie star or whatever. With him, it's we walked into his room, in his house, and it's very clear that he is the puppet master. Like it's all you know what I mean? Really? Everything is his. Really? It's me. This is my party. Do you think to some degree to have that level of Oscar to have that level like again to Michael

Jordan and stuff you you have to be that kind of person? Yeah I mean that is kind of always the people say that all the time is like well you got to kind of be insane to like get to the top and to some degree you do Yeah, hold on one second someone knocking at the door. I don't know if that was Joe Hold on and cut go answer and see who it is. That's funny. He's gonna record it. That's my favorite part Watch this Towels. Towels. Towels? I'll be getting you towels.

Yeah. But can you come back in like an hour? Thank you. He thinks we're shooting a fucking porno I bet now. And by the way, we are. After this I told you, you are sucking when this is over. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but the building up of these like monolithic people, I do think you do need to be,

I wouldn't say you need to be like, it's an old cliche of like, you need to be depressed to be a good comedian. That's completely untrue. No, that is not true. That's a bullshit cliche. You need to have some sort of, you need to be, comedians are very intelligent,

like extremely intelligent. Like I've met guys that I'm like, wow, this guy, you can tell that their brain works at the speed of light. Or you're kind of a broken idiot like us. You're a broken moron. You're one of the two to be good. And so you don't need to be like, you don't need to have trauma or so much pain in your life

to be a good comic, but you need to have, you need to have a viewpoint on the world that comes from something kind of specific. Could be trauma, could be brilliance. It could be, you know be a complete disconnect from reality. You feel like you're not like everyone else. So yes, to be the best at something, you must be a little different.

You can't be a run-of-the-mill person, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm just saying, you can't be like a normal archetype in society and excel at whatever you're doing because that wouldn't make any sense. You'd have to be a little bit more unique than everybody. Doesn't mean it's better, because by the way, usually it's a curse. You look at someone like Hunter S. Thompson, who's a fucking genius,

but what a broken brain. And he was brilliant. He saw the world in this really distorted lens, showed it to everybody, and then we were like, you're the man. And he's like, I'm dying. Yeah, most artists are like that. They're struggling and then we have their art in museums everywhere marveling at it and they were terribly fucked up people 100% and you

don't need to be like shattered but I do think you need to be you need to be off kilter you're definitely not normal and that's okay like you're not normal I'm not nor we're not normal that's fine, we do normal shit. I went to the gym, I get a coffee, like I do normal stuff, but the way that this thing works and the way we think doesn't make us superior, we're weird, we're a little off. But that's why it's really- We said the thing when we were a kid

that our parents were like, why would you say that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then when you get to this level and you start meeting other people like that, and the conversations that we can have in the green rooms, that is a very different conversation than you can have with any of your funny friends too. Right. Yeah.

You can't, they just, they're not, I was talking about it with someone and it's almost like playing tennis and, uh, you're playing tennis against one of your very funny friends, right? But they're just, they're, they're a different level and you have to lower your game so that you have a good game with them, right? Right, but then when you get to hang out with another pro and you know, Theo Vans here or something Suddenly your games lifted and you're like, oh shit. I'm playing tennis Yeah, that's right. You're playing pickleball with your funny friends. You're playing tennis with us playing tennis. By the way, you don't do this Do you do pickleball? This is swept the world. No, no, no. I can't. I can't. No, I can't. I haven't even tried it and everyone's like,

you got to try it. You have to do it. I don't want to try it in case I do turn into one of these pickleheads. You will though. Yeah, probably. It'll probably be unreal. You'll be a pickleman in no time. I've done tennis. I'm fine with tennis. I can do, but I, um, I have no interest in that game because I, I don't know, the challenge of tennis is hard enough. I think tennis is extremely difficult to be good at. So don't know the challenge of tennis is hard enough. I think tennis is extremely difficult to be good at. So even that is the challenge that I like because I don't I'm nowhere near being good at tennis but I'm good enough to play just play it. Me too. But you're like a pretty all-round sports guy. I was lucky that I was athletic my whole life. So like tennis

to me is the one that is the hardest. Oh, it is? Well, because my instinct, I played baseball and golf. So my instinct is to hit the fucking shit out of it. Right, right. Do you know what I mean? But tennis is so much finesse. So it's power and finesse, which baseball and golf are too,

but there's something about tennis. When you play a really good tennis player, it shakes your world how precise you have to be to be good at tennis. You're like, holy fuck, how did you get that over the net right to that spot? It's remarkable. It is good. When you play someone good at tennis, like I play a million guys, I played with pro golfers, I have friends that are pros, and it's impressive. Not like when I've watched a ranked tennis

player play. Yeah, because the power and strength and and the targeting of it for some reason, because you can see it with golf, someone has a great golf shot. On accident, an average idiot can hit a phenomenal golf shot on accident once in a while. You know how many people have holes in ones that are terrible at golf? Yeah, I got a buddy who's dog shit. He has three. You know what I mean? Like it happens. It's just gonna happen. In tennis that's not a real thing. You can't be dog shit and hit a phenomenally perfect you know 75 miles an hour shot to one little corner. That's never gonna happen. That's interesting. I've always thought about 10 pin bowling that way. When I watch it they're getting strike after strike. I'm like this is is good. But by mistake, my mom can get a strike.

Exactly. My mom would never in her life be able to shoot a three pointer in basketball. You know, she's just, if my mom would just like never, but she could accidentally get a strike. So to watch them get strike after strike, I'm like, this is good, but it is, I think it's the same when I watch, um, uh, kite surfing, they're not doing enough. Did he just say? Jesus Christ, you don't know what I just said Russell Craig no Mel Gibson. Jesus get out of here. No Surfing thank you

No kite surfing what about it? Well, I look at it and it doesn't impress me enough to go my god This is incredible. I think you need to be jumping over like Cruise ships on those things. Yeah, you do need to up it a bit That's true when I watch snowboarding because I don't snowboard and they're doing massive. I'm like, wow, that is incredible But no one on a kite surfer yet. I've gone. Oh my god. I can't believe they're doing that. You need to step it up Well, it's cuz you're also like you're still tethered to a kite. So the freedom isn't yet Right. You still born is still flying a car still flying a kite Put a lolly in your fucking mouth while you fly that

Do you ski then you don't snowboard but you ski no, no, no I don't really know I've done snowboarding a couple times But I think I've got to a point in my life where I'm just pretending for my friends that I like it. I don't Don't need it. I love that Drop at it by the by the time you reach 40 you start to go I actually don't like doing that and I'm not gonna do it anymore Yeah, I don't need to fulfill you we can go do something else You have a mate, but I don't need to go to the mountain with you that where does it snow in Australia?

There is a couple of spots that it will snow. Yes a couple of spots There's not all closest to here is all the blue mountains There is a couple of spots that it will snow. Yeah, there's a couple of spots. But not often. The closest to here is, well the Blue Mountains will get a bit of snow and stuff, but there's... Not enough to ski though. Yeah, yeah, but oof, no. It's bad snow. You know when you go to Big Bear and it's the end of the season? It's wet snow.

That's the best that we'll get. Slushy. Yeah. But New Zealand's two hour flight and that's world class. Yeah, that's good, yeah, that's different. But that's way more south than here, right? Yeah, but I mean a two-hour flight to go Ski perfect conditions is probably worth it if you're gonna do it That's kind of what most people do in America anyway, right? Like we yeah, we can ski you can drive in California We can drive up to well mammoth to mammoth

Yeah, that's pretty good But you'd rather just jump on a plane for an hour and 40 minutes and go to Colorado or Utah I mean if you really want yeah, want, you really want the fun. See, I love it. I fucking love it. You do what, snowboarding? I've done both. I mean, as a kid, the first thing I learned

was snowboarding, oddly enough, because a bunch of my teenage friends did it. And then I learned how to ski, but now I'm an old man. I probably should just ski, but I do love snowboarding. Was that when you first started when you were a kid, was that when snowboarding first started too? Well yeah, right, we're like the same age, so like at the popularity of snowboarding that like really,

it was because of skateboard culture. When I was a kid in the 90s, skateboarding lent itself so easily to, that every kid that skateboarded wanted to snowboard. Cause it was also, it was very like anti-authority, it's against the ski world and ski culture was like rich, you know, snooty, fucking Aspen. And snowboard felt like rats on the mountain.

Like you were a rat in the street on a skateboard, you were a rat on the mountain with a board too. Even though snowboarding is unbelievably expensive. I mean it's a fucking ripoff. Oh yeah, it's ridiculous. The gear, the lift passes, the flight, the hotel. It's all a ripoff. You have to have money to do it anyway. Yeah, that is an elite level sport.

Where skateboarding was so cheap. Now you get a $100 deck and you're, yeah, we all ratbag skaters here for sure when we were kids, but that led into surfing as opposed to the snowboarding side. But also surfing, the board is expensive. After that it's not expensive, but the board is expensive as shit.

Yeah, but you gotta travel to surf. you can't really stay at your home break and and and just Surf every day you've got to spend money on trips. Yeah, you have to well see it's funny Cuz like guys like Malibu guys that I know there's a bunch of Malibu guys that are comics They surf every morning, and they've been doing it for I don't know seven eight years since I've been hearing about it Yeah, they're shit. Oh wow you hear that Daniel Tosh yeah and all your friends also I'll say listen up your shit Eddie Eddie I'll say I've served with Eddie how about Tosh is Tosh good or no touches the touches are up but he's still he's Lachlan Patterson he's's great. No. Whoa, I love this shit. I come from Australia.

So you're better than all these guys. Yeah. I love this shit dude. I don't surf so I just hear them talk about it all the time and I have no connection to it. Here's the thing, you're called Monty Franklin calling out the boys. I'm going to get so much trouble for saying this. If you're better, you're better. California for surfing you think., California is where the surf is. California surf is shit. It is terribly shit. I think people that live in California know the surf is not that great. A lot of them think Malibu for instance is perfect, but it's tiny. The surf is this small. The waves are weak. If you really want surf in America, you got to go to Hawaii, which is that's the best in the world. That's kink shit. Yeah, that's that I've heard. That's that's I'm not even gonna compare what about like what about

like Central Central America have you ever been there yeah I surfed in Nicaragua and around Costa Rica and Costa Rica is the shit yeah I went to I went I went down to Costa Rica and he showed me this the guy who was showing us around showed me this area and I'm so dumb because my brain always forgets but it in translation it means Death Bay or not death bay or like Fuck something like that because all these tourists will come from all over the world Oh, yeah, and they think they can surf this shit and even expert surfers are like I'll fuck that shit up and the locals are like Okay, okay. Really? Okay, because it's because I guess the break is so fast it's by it's by Manuel Antonio

Antonio on the west side yeah I will I'll look up the beach later but the guy said the break is so quick and hard and the angle is so tough you know coming off of the rocks I guess yeah that people get fucked up real bad from it. Well, there's places here that are probably worse than that. In Sydney in particular. Danger-wise. Danger-wise. They are breaking onto, like, there's a place called The Rocks here, I think it's called.

Pretty literal. Yeah, quite literally. But I'll show you footage of this wave. You're actually like, I can't believe they're doing this. Right. Foolish almost. Completely foolish almost completely like that's the one where they go out with the um with the wave runner and they tow you out on a wave runner but guys paddle into it too okay there's a group of guys here from Maroubra that go and surf this spot and it's it's death it is crazy that I

wouldn't surf it so when I hear you I'm here talking myself up at a level but there there's most most people that surf in Australia that are doing it properly, are really very good surfers. What size waves do you do? Me? I like, you guys measure them differently, so I like about a four to six foot wave. Why do we measure differently? What does that mean? We in Australia and Hawaii both measure the waves from the back of the wave and most Californians and stuff will measure it from the front so they say the face of the wave was 12 foot the actual wave is four and a half foot and that's what it actually is. Wow. So it's kind of

confusing sometimes but the easiest way to say is like double overhead so I like a wave that's about double overhead yeah. So it's 12 feet weight weight 12 foot yeah but from behind the wave it would probably be about six so let's cut it in half yeah so it's just your regular height kind of yeah yeah this is so fucking confusing for no reason it is a bit confusing for no reason why isn't it globally just accepted that it's one size I don't know like how would you if you went to center if you go to Central America and you surf would do they say it your way or American way they kind of say both they'll say it's six foot ten foot face and stuff like that.

Ten foot face. Very annoying. Just pick a fucking wave size. But Hawaiians and Australians do the same so that's kind of generally what it is. So if you're surfing, but then in surfing terms if you say like a solid six foot that means it's six but there's eight, nine, tenors coming through. But the baseline is six. So if anyone says to you it's a solid six foot out there it's a it's a big day that's a good day yeah that's a little bit of shit yourself cuz oh fuck here comes a ten-footer what's the biggest freak out though is that you're gonna be that's

when you the throw under when you get crashed under that sucks the most no that's not too bad I think you just normal shit goes through your head like if the board smacks you in your head and you're unconscious and you drown or you're gonna hit the reef and normal shit. Just regular ass shit. Knock myself unconscious, lose my teeth. No teeth here, tooth loss? Anybody you know? Knock out a tooth from the board? No. So I feel like that would be my fear is knocking out my fucking teeth. Really? Yeah, just because like-

The vanity! Yeah, well they're terrible already. I don't need them even fucking worse. I have fucking teeth. Really? Yeah, just because I vanity. Yeah Well, they're terrible already. I don't need them even fucking worse. I have shitty teeth I don't need worse teeth than they already have I'm at a bat. I'm at a basement level. I don't need to go subterranean with my mouth You're a solid six. I've chipped up my teeth so much for so long. I'm a seven, but thank you But I said solid you didn't need that means I means you have to eat. I know, I got the reference, but the tens are coming. In here, we pour whiskey. This episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you

by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online, whether you're just starting out or you're managing a growing brand. Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience and sell anything from products to content at time all in one place

all on your terms. I've talked about Squarespace so much on this show it's because I used it and I like it. I like it a lot. What's great about Squarespace, everything is flexible now. You know, with Squarespace payments, it's the easiest way to manage your payments in one place. Onboarding is fast and simple, get started with a few clips and start receiving payments right away. If you're looking to build a site,

I don't know what you do. I don't know who you are, whether you're a personal trainer. Let's say you make little trinkets and knickknacks. You make little figurines, little porcelain figurines that go above a toilet to give people a smile. You can sell it, distribute it, talk about it on Squarespace because it's the only place to create your own beautiful website. They have SEO tools

and every single Squarespace website is optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions, auto-generated sitemap and more. So you show up much more often, that's the best part. You pop up before your competitors. All right, you have email campaigns blasted out to the world and also there is Courses. It has the tools designed to create and sell your own online course. Start with a layout that fits your brand. Upload videos. Say you're someone that's teaching someone how to do Taekwondo. And you want to do it all from the comfort of your home. Well you can do it by creating a site through

Squarespace. There's invoicing and of course I love the analytics. It's my favorite. You can measure your end to end online performance with powerful website seller analytics. They can know where you are, where you're coming from, and you can know who they are and where they are and what they're into. Helps you focus on engagement and track your sales so you can scale your brand, your business and fully integrate it and clearly displayed so you can see what's going on. So how do you do it? How do you get it? What do you need to do, Andrew? Well, it's very, very simple. All right. Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, go to Squarespace.com slash whiskey to save 10%

off your first purchase of a website or domain. That code is whiskey. Of course, as always Squarespace.com slash whiskey to save 10% off your first purchase of website or domain. This episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you by BetterHelp. I've talked about BetterHelp so very much because I believe in speaking to somebody about what's going on with you. What's going on with you? You never know what someone else is going through. We're all kind of ruminating around this world. Some people are better than others and some people are handling things better than others. But this this month it's all about gratitude being thankful alright and uh... sometimes

it's uh... hard to uh... give yourself some grace be good to yourself it's a reminder to send some thanks and love to people in your life send me love down below say hey love you dog uh... because therapy can help you get through some tough tough times because sometimes you don't know who to talk to who to turn to in your social circle and

your family circle it's not easy and this way you can do it from the comfort of your own home on your terms whenever you feel like it if you're thinking of starting therapy get better help a try it's entirely done online designed to be convenient flexible and suited to your schedule as the British say just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapist at any time for no additional charge. You don't like who you're speaking with? Get a new one.

You don't like that one? Get a new one. You don't like that one? Get a new one. All right? Let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash Whiskey today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, BetterH-E-L-P dot com slash Whiskey.

Ginger. I like gingers. month. That's better help better. H e l p dot com slash whiskey. No, I chipped up my teeth so much over the years in sports so much I've had I I have bonding on for my teeth. You know, cap. Yeah, yeah. What sports are knocking your teeth out? Well, basketball, I played basketball my whole life. And that was basketball. What elbow in the elbows a lot of elbows when you're I mean, I was aggressive. I love to be down under I I love banging boards I thought it was so fun being in the gut of it all then you get older and you're like I don't want to fucking catch a black eye like it's just

annoying Wow I never thought about basketball like that I guess when you're gritty and gruff and doing it on the streets of New York you're gonna get smacked in there should I not have done that? Was the way you say it, ready gruff the streets of New York, hardcore, New York. No, you know what? You know what it really is. Basketball has had this bullshit attachment to like not being a tough sport. What's it? I say it's not a contact sport. It's fucking insane. Go play it. Go play it with talented ballplayers. Like water polo. You ever done that shit out of you? They'll be under the water.

They have to say, beat the shit out of you. They beat the shit out of you. But any any basketball that's at a high level. Here's the problem at streetball level. It's more aggressive because it's unhinged. They're not talented enough to control their bodies. Right. So people more you'll get way more injuries at amateur basketball because people don't know what the fuck they're doing.

Right. Right. Like I had a I had a bruised vertebrae. I almost broke my neck when I was in high school. I fell on my neck. because people don't know what the fuck they're doing. Right. Like I had a bruised vertebrae. I almost broke my neck when I was in high school. I fell on my neck. I went up for a rebound and a guy took out my legs because he was out of control. Right. And I smashed on my knife. I landed on my neck and I got a severe concussion.

I vomited and I lost my vision for a couple hours. It was fucking wild. Jesus. Yeah. I almost broke my fucking neck. Also, my buddy, Tom, called my mom and he's like, he's like, um, don't freak out. But Andrew's in the hospital and he threw up everywhere and there's blood. And my mom was like, don't freak out. What a shitty folk.

You start with don't freak out. I didn't have the smartest friends when I was a kid. Tom, you idiot. Yeah. Tom, Tom, Tommy. Anyway, but basketball is a super aggressive, super aggressive sport, and the more talented people are around you, the more like in control aggressive you can be. But that's one of the sports that I've watched down at Santa Monica Beach when I first went to America and it blew my mind how good they were and how it orchestrated it was and the passes and it was choreography, it was bloody dance and I was just sitting there

going this is incredible it's like white men can't jump. But that's why black people are so good at it because it is like dance. It's like dancing. It's dancing with a ball. We had a guy last night we had a guy from the Sydney Kings is that what the team we had a professional basketball player at the show last night I called he was in the front row. I think I was the American. No, no, there's a lot of Americans come here and play No, he was he actually no. No, he was from What did he say? He was from do you remember not from Australia? Not an American. No, no, there's a few Europeans and stuff. He might have been yeah, he came over here and his

He played for the NBL. Yeah, which is your league. Yeah, it's not it. Yeah. He was the only black guy in the entire show I don't think it's I don't think it's a very elite league. Although we do very well at the Olympics We kind of come in the yeah, you do get a Show up. Yeah, that's kind of weird. But then we import them and then they're gone You know, you know, they go and play like we've had a good few good players that have gone to NBA but that we've had more NFL players a lot of punters kicking the ball yeah this is a big thing yeah the punter the new the punter revolution which I don't if you follow the NFL at all but no I I don't think I follow

anything anymore I'm really anti kicking in football but they got to do it no I don't think they do I think they should take it out completely really Yeah, we've changed the rules a lot so much around kickoffs now where it has to you know, the yeah I don't get rid of it. Actually, I think we should be gone My buddy played ten years Dallas Cowboys and was getting six mill a year or something and he kicked the ball one once maybe Six million for that crazy. It's a joke. We need to be, yeah, I don't like kicking in football. I don't like that these, you know,

these men on the field are busting their ass and then it all comes down to one dickhead kicking who isn't even a football player. Well, they do that in rugby sometimes. People got upset. A few years ago, they did the world cup and there was an English player called Johnny Wilkinson who just kept kicking goals as opposed to running them in.

And the whole country was in arms. They hated him. who just kept kicking goals as opposed to running goal running him in and the whole country was in arms they hated him. But that is inherently a part of the game it's such a kicking is such a big part of the game where I think football you could remove it I know it's historically but you could remove it the only reason we have kicking a football I'm ignorant but I'm guessing but I think I might be right is because of of you guys, right? Or because of, not you guys, but because of rugby, because of, right, because of football sports that predate American football, we stole that and added elements to it. Added that element.

But all the punter does is kick the team out of trouble, right? That's all they're doing. Like, you're so far back, they're like, oh, get the guy and kick it as far as, yeah. So that's all that is. It's a shitty thing. What you could do is you could do a thing, there was a guy who did an article about it, it's called a surrender, right? Like if you're too far in your danger zone and you need to kick it away, you do a surrender,

you take a statistical average of how many times kicks would go to where they would go, and you do a surrender, then they get the ball at that side, on their side of the field, but with an advantage. They do a similar thing in rugby, there is a thing of what you're saying. Yes.

Surrender. Yeah, why the fuck don't we do that then then you eliminate kicking and by the way, then if you score a touchdown Instead of kicking an extra point or going for a two-point conversion You have to go for you have to go for it and a run is worth one to me and a pass is worth two That's what you do. Yeah, that's more fun. It's way more fucking football again. Yeah all the time Yeah, and then on a kickoff and then there's no foot being used at all. Yeah football ball. Yes Then it's football again, all the time. And then on a kickoff. And then there's no foot being used at all in your football game. It's just called ball. Let's go fucking play ball. Let's go ball! Can we just play ball today?

No, but I do actually like, I went to an Aussie Rules football game in Melbourne. Australian Rules is great. It was wild. It's the fastest game on earth, they say say like you would have seen it. It just goes around constantly. It's non-stop And it's player on player stuff. So as opposed to NFL that's team on team driven up Yeah, it's almost like basketball in that respect. You have one player that you just chase around the field I love that. It's constantly going and they are running 20 to 30 K's a game which miles That's 40 40 miles no no no no 12 miles okay so they're doing that flat-out sprinting the whole

game it's crazy yeah yeah the shape that those guys are in is funny because you know no offense but there was a rugby guy at the fucking gym this morning and the rugby guys are different well you can be jacked as a rugby guy, you can also be fat. Yeah, you can. Like this guy was fucking fat as shit, and he's strong, right? No doubt. But the NFL guys are like that, aren't they?

The front, the big guys aren't they? 100%, 100%. It's the same thing, but rugby guys are funnier to me because our, well look, let's put it this way. Football guys, like NFL size guys, like those linemen you're talking about, these are specimens to behold. Where these rugby guys like this guy and a lot of guys I've seen, they don't have to be super tall and big.

Our guys are tall and fucking big. Rugby guys could be 5'9", but be a brick shithouse. Yeah. Most of the time in the NFL, if you're a lineman and you're under six feet, you're never gonna fucking make it. Yeah, yeah. Like good luck. That's no chance. The rugby guys are just tough. You know when you see a guy that just has a thick neck, they don't need to be big and everything but you're like, oh that guy's tough. Yeah, he's been sitting in this machine all day.

That's what rugby guys are. They're just tough. Like you will punch him and their face won't even move. Yeah, they're tough as nails. I think that that's why I think because rugby has made such, I mean those guys are fucking animals. Football, NFL, another thing, and we're stuck on this, but they should do no helmets. No helmets. In football? Yeah, that will help with the concussion thing that's going on. It actually will tremendously. They've actually done research to found that it will because once you teach people how to

tackle the right way, they won't fucking use their heads to stop the ball. Like, what do you mean? They they're running in and just using their head. But rugby guys, they're the concussions and rugby are significantly less than in football. Because men lead with their head when they tackle, because you have a protection plate on. Yeah, okay. So if you remove the helmet, just like rugby, your instinct is to make a more concise tackle so you don't hurt yourself and you don't hurt them.

Football is just like, I'm going to fucking kill that guy. I'm going to run as fast as I can, they lower lower their helmet and a lot of them do it instinctively on accident And then they get a fucking concussion they used to have no helmets in football right? I mean yeah They have leather it was a leather Wasn't really a helmet it was almost like it was like a hat Yeah, it was actually just cuz they because their hair would get messy, so they just wanted a hat on wanted to look good Yeah, it was vain. It was all vanity was the game then of a different tackling nature because of what you're saying Well, I mean you got it. I mean you look back

It's like also the men are half the size right like you're talking babe Bruce and thinking that he could hit a homer today and Right there throwing the ball like 52 miles an hour. Yeah Greatest baseball or like no show. Hey, oh, Tony now. That's a fucking guy, but that's the greatest baseballer alive. No Shohei Otani now that's a fucking guy but that's the progression of every sport is going to be better and better but those guys weren't the... these guys are so big now like I'm friends with a couple of pro football players they're so fucking big yeah if they push you joking around yeah you'd fall to the ground and maybe twist an ankle if they push you you know what I mean you'd be like that hurts. Their sheer force is so different now that the helmets aren't doing shit.

Well, I had a friend growing up who played AFL, elite level, and won two Brownlow medals, which means he was the MVP twice. Like, he's Tom Brady. Brownline medal? Brownlow medal. Brownlow medal. Brownlow medal. What's Brownlow? It's some bloke's last name. So it's named after him.

Shout out to Bob Brownlow out there. Yeah, Mr. Brownlow. So, but when we were growing up and teenagers and everything, he was four times stronger than any of us, but he looked exactly like me. Like I'm, I've got the build of like an AFL player, like six foot one sort of lean rugby players are like you said, shorter and much stockier and strong as fuck. he was my exact size just four times stronger So like we'd just be mucking around and he just got pulled and you get it fall to the ground It shocks you how much like it's central they have such like a good center force There's something about when you meet someone that has that you know, that's like well, that's someone that's God get you

Yeah, yeah something gave that to you you that is another level of like another level supreme gifted being who's that there's mr. Brownlow's name is Chad Brownlow yes look at him send that to Joe that's so funny Chas Brownlow he does look like JP Morgan look at that see you guys have the Brownlow and we have banks did banking. We made the banking industries. Exactly right dude. What made Mel so mad. You're gonna pull me over sugar tits? By the way every time I'm on Malibu and I go to Moon Shadows, Moon Shadows will inherently be,

that was the place he left to go when he was getting drunk. That is always in my mind. Every time I drive by Moon Shadows I'm like, that's fucking Sugar Tits. Who was he calling Sugar Tits? A cop! Oh that bit! He got pulled over, we went back, because he said that's what Mel's so mad about we he got pulled over By a cop he called her he said Hey sugar tits, and then he mentioned he was like you're not a Jew are you right isn't that what he said something like that?

Yeah, when did this all go down? Oh god? This is like 15 years, right? That is the one that I'm thinking I thought maybe there was a new one. No he's bounced back No, he's bounced back. No, he's he made passion to Christ revitalize the guy. He'll find the exact same the exact quote that he did. Also, I don't think he should have been given all the flack that he got because of that. That's a that's a lapse in a man's timing and judgment under the influence. You should be able to apologize and move forward.

Yeah, like like like he didn't beat a child to death, right? He didn't like assault some. He said some dumb shit. Yeah, shouldn't have said it. Yeah, Like he didn't beat a child to death, right? He didn't like assault some... He said some dumb shit. Yeah. Shouldn't have said it. Yeah. You're an asshole. Yeah. Say my bad and then let's move on. Yeah. What'd he say? Here we go. What are you looking at, sugar tits? That's what he said to the cop. What? It's on a quote website. Oh. With a sunset. That is... That is... That is... What are you looking at, sugar tits? Still copies pretty funny. It's very funny, dude. It's just funny.

Like, but not cool. Also, all right, let's move on. But they, dude, they lashed him so hard for that. I remember it was also the, the anti-Semitic stuff is where they clipped him. They were like, oh, he did, well, whatever the Jew quote was, that's what they really got mad. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

The sugar tits was bullheaded. Sugar tits this round of the mill. By the way, you see how people talk to cops now, now that everyone has a cell phone and they're recording, you know, people record them talking to a cop now. Yeah, they say wild ass shit. There's videos of guys in New York. For some reason, NYPD gets fucked with the most because they know they're always being recorded.

So they don't want to do anything crazy. Yeah, but you'll see guys go up to New York. There's a guy on Tiktok who goes up to like cops and just fucks and talk shit. And they just they're like, shut the fuck up, get the fuck out of here because they deal with it all day long. But you're like, man, that's so funny. What are you looking at? Sugar tips compared to this guy just trolling cops. This guy would walk up to cops. He's on TikTok. I don't know his name, but he

walks up with with donuts. He goes, you want a donut, you fat pig ass motherfucker. You want a donut, bitch? And he'll shove it in their fucking face It's really insane yeah, but they they don't have the time of day to deal with it and also he's on his phone So what are they gonna do? They're not breaking any laws. They're just being rude You know we have a very different relationship to cops in this country than you do in America Well, we all have a different relationship with cops even in our country. Yeah, that's one person how they feel It's not it's not a universal feeling.

All right, that's true. Do you know what I mean? We're so... This is something I've never seen before. It was years ago when I first moved to America, and I went to a college party. Yeah, like a frat party? Yeah, and I was probably 30.

But I was... Whoooo! I was... Yeesh! It was on the street that I was on, and I just went, and I said, I want to go and experience what a college party is. Sure. kids said come in we'll play beer pong and stuff and yeah fun But the cops came and the kid who owned the head I've never seen someone talk to police like this

He opened the door and he just was like I know my rights You can't come in and like everything like that to the cool my fucking dad is no He was doing that one and he's like, do you know who my dad is? Like I know my rights. I don't need to do this and stuff and I was there going this is ridiculous Yeah, what happens in Australia if you're having a party and the cops come around is someone will answer the door The cops will come they'll have a conversation with the cops like they're mates They'll become friends with the cops and then they will become the police Representative in the party and they'll go around and go now keep it down guys. Those were good guys. Those were nice cops All right, come on Jimmy turn the music down, they were nice

guys okay? And they'll start getting angry but turn into the authority. They'll become the cops. Because they just were mates with the cops for a second. It's great, it's like a police pyramid scheme. Yeah it is. Right, you're selling cops like you're selling fucking Tupperware, door to door. I think I'll become a cop. Yeah. They just see it. But cops here, every, any cop I've ever met here, the demeanor is different, right? Like our

demeanor in America, most city police I'm referencing, right? Like Los Angeles, Chicago, New York. If you're a city cop, your demeanor is you're on the defense. Like every cop kind of feels like you should be right there on the defense. Like every cop kind of feels like... You should be. Right, they're on the defense. Yeah. Out here, it feels like they are kind of just milling about waiting for something to do. They're kind of rallying and making sure everyone doesn't get too out of hand, is what they're doing. They're just kind of like... And they're like, all right, easy, easy, easy.

Right, exactly. And they're like, you keep doing what you're doing and whatever you're doing is illegal, but just easy. Right, right. Come on, and then as soon as it gets out of hand then they can go okay That's too far you know and that's happened to me plenty of times I've been thrown in the back of the car and taken home really like a drunk tank yeah, but they'd They're nice about it. There's like all right that you've gone too far get in the car, and I go all right

I've gone too far, so I get in the car, and I get driven on sweet way to go to jail cops in Australia kind of feel like You know the you know when you're at the airport and you're in the security line and that roped off part, but you know how you can just pull up on the thing and just skip through it? That's kind of how it feels as police here where you're like, I mean, I'll obey it, but I also could just fucking not. That's what the whole of Australia is like.

Yeah, just pull up the thing and skip the line. Like any legal thing is, I'll obey it to a point, but I'm not going to, and then you do what you want. Yeah, you kind of do what you you want but we do kind of listen to authority a lot and I think that comes from convict heritage and yeah you don't need England yeah you don't want your shit taken away so you're like all right I won't be too much of a scallywag so that I don't get in more trouble than I need to but I still want my shit and I still want to do a little bit of illegal

stuff we're all criminals slightly so you know I'll steal shit just small in more trouble than I need to. But I still want my shit, and I still wanna do a little bit of illegal stuff. We're all criminals, slightly. So, you know, I'll steal shit, just small stuff. What do you steal? By the way, Scallywag, such a British phrase. Scallywag? Scallywag, such an old term. What do you like to steal?

Oh, just, you know, some grapes at the supermarket when you're walking around and just, you know, enjoy your life, you know? Put some underwear on in Target and fucking walk out. You know okay. No never done that but I get it. Yeah live What's the last thing that you stole recently? At Chipotle they forget to charge me for guacamole and I just don't say anything about that And you get your nice little $2.80 a guac and in your heart. You're like, yeah fuck you guys Small crime, but this place is easy to steal from.

It just feels like no one's really watching you here for some reason. Like everywhere I've been. Oh yeah. In America there is Big Brother and you feel it. You know what it is? You've got levels. You've got City Cop and then you've got Feds and then you've got other ones that you don't even know and then there's Elite Illuminati and who knows what's

going on there. God bless. Well we do don't we? Hey! Hey! Hey! After this! We are going to a Diddy party tonight And then there's a lead to luminati and who knows what's going on there. God bless. Well, we do don't we? Yeah We are going to a ditty party tonight actually, yeah, he's flew in just for this Is that why there's ten gallons of lube next to your bed? That's 12 actually, but yeah, that's a big one I got the super size one got the big Yeah, we're going to a ditty party down under what is happening there He can you tell me in layman's terms exactly what's happening because I haven't figured it out yet. He is absolutely unequivocally going to go away to prison for a very long time for trafficking. They're going to get him for trafficking. Right. But is he the head or is he just the one that they're taking down?

Well he's one of the heads. Right. Right, it's almost like in a crime family, you're never gonna get like the top, but you're gonna get one of the top, you're gonna get one of the captains as they call them, right? Okay. So you may not get like the main guy, but you'll get- But he's the head of a family. Well, he's 100% the head of a perv family for sure. I mean, enough people have talked about it for years that the guy was, he would have these insane parties where, look, I would

say probably 90% of the shit that was going on at that party was normal. 90% of it was just coming over drinking with beautiful people who are famous and rich. And trying to hook up. That's a normal thing. That's a normal party. 10% of it was like after hours, who's staying for some wild ass bullshit? And who stayed for the wild ass bullshit? We're going see, because the papers are gonna come out. And they say Jay-Z's name is all over it.

Isn't it funny, the clips that are coming up of Diddy doing something on a show, and then, but watch their reaction next to him, and Jay-Z's just there going, I'm like, fuck. This did not age wells for Diddy, where he's like, he's patting down Justin Bieber for a wire, that's like the weirdest feeling. Yeah, and when you see something like that, you obviously would never recognize it at the time

You're like, oh he's goofing with him or something. Yeah, but man, how creepy did you see the Tyson one? Uh-uh. They're sitting on a Yes, and he's trying to hold his hand and Tyson just puts his hand down and just sits like they're like I'll kill you Kill you and did he kind of just goes shouldn't have grabbed his hand down and just sits like they're like I'll kill you and did he kind of just go so shouldn't have grabbed his hand but that's funny the Tyson clip that just I saw resurfaced now was the yeah I'm voting for Trump so what and and this is from the first time not from this time right they've resurfaced it but the best part is like I don't know he's on a radio show I don't know who it was and he was like. I don't know who it was, and he was like,

why, I don't like that you're doing that. He goes, I don't give a shit, so what? What are you gonna do about it? When Mike Tyson says to you, what are you gonna do about it? That's end game, that's checkmate. What would you say back? Nothing, not at all.

Do you know when he did his standup for a little while? Yeah, I saw that, his live show. Did you ever see him at the Comedy Store? He was working through stuff? No, he did a couple of them Yeah, he was warming up for the Broadway version. So I never saw it. I knew he was there but it was extremely like Produced and coordinated they were like really testing out to see how it would feel definitely So I never saw it, but I did hear that like, you know, the unfortunate thing is like being

Behind the curtain for us. Sometimes. Yeah is a detriment cuz you're like, oh, I don unfortunate thing is like being behind the curtain for us sometimes is a detriment cause you're like, oh, I don't wanna see, I know how the sausage is made. I don't wanna watch somebody else making sausage. I'd rather just see it when it's done in the store. Well, I walked into the comedy store one night and you know how it is. And I walked down into the back hallway

and there was no one around and it was 10 PM. And I'm like, what is happening? And I went back there and it was just Mike Tyson in that hallway. Oh shit. He was about to go on in the original room and I walked in and he just looked at me and he went like that. Fuck off. I'm serious. He just went like that like he was so nervous because he was about to do stand-up for the very first time. Wow. It was the first time that he did it and now I realize why no one was around in the hallway He's been hissing he's been hissing at everybody and everyone and I just kind of went

Did your Monty pissed himself from the hallway yeah, yeah Why I think Tyson hissed at him and then Monty just urinated all down his leg a hiss is such a It's not even a masculine thing for him to do. No, it's terrifying. Terrifying. Right. So he's so nervous, his reaction is, what are you doing here? And he just went... That's so creepy. If he flexed on you, you'd be really scared. The hiss is like, oh, he's going to eat me alive. Yeah. I need to back away from this terrifying animal. He is, he is... I love him. What a bounce back story that guy goes to prison comes out now He's God everybody loves a guy. I love him. Yeah, well. He's gonna lose. He's gonna lose. I think that fight

I just well this already have happened by the time that fights over so I am curious because the fights in two days, right? Or in three days. No, it's next Saturday. Oh it is yeah, okay, okay, so We should go we'll be in Melbourne. We should go watch it it somewhere. Yeah, I'm down. Um, it's on Netflix, that's crazy. It's crazy this is happening. One of the best deals of all time. I mean, I love Mike Tyson, he's to me the greatest fighter ever, but also, um, he's, the age gap is absurdist. I mean, it's insane. You're fighting a kid, like, and a kid who is in phenomenal shape. And he's a pro, like, he's good. He's very good, but even if he wasn't that good the other forces age is The fucking yeah age is the thing that's gonna get all of us. You can't deny it

Yeah, you weren't Mike Tyson when you're 24 years old. Yeah, he's what 50 how old 53 or something like that It's undeniable. He's in phenomenal shape and he looks great. He looks powerful everything doesn't matter Oh, yeah, three. Yeah, or whatever. I mean at some point The it gets you 58 that's insane. That is insane. Yeah, he's probably strongest 58 year old in the world Yeah, but that's not yeah, like he'll kill me with one punch, but you know, but we don't we don't fight for a living Yeah, I'd hope he wins, but I think he will lose unfortunately I think that was my prediction is that if I'm a betting man I think I'm gonna he I don't want him to lose but I think he will you know

I mean like in the same way that You're like I Don't I'd like to see a fair fight. Yeah, but I don't even know how much like I went to the Mayweather McGregor fight Oh, yeah, yes. Yeah, fucking awful. Yeah terrible. Yeah shit. It was all for show So I'm afraid that yeah, we'll also be I think it might be tempered Yeah, I think it might be because when Tyson fought Who do you fight recently or was probably a few years ago now and they did like a exhibition thing. Was it, it was, uh, it was another famous boxer who I can't buddy.

Remember? Cause I'm dumb. Yeah. I'm so, but they came out and they both kind of were, they were dancing. They weren't fighting because they don't want to anymore. Like who wants to fucking get hit in the face? Yeah. I don't know if he's going to knock Tyson out or anything.

No, I don't think he'll knock him out. But I do think he's gonna fuck him. Roy Jones Jr. Yeah, Roy Jones. That's right. Shit, I saw Roy Jones Jr. get knocked out here by an Australian fighter called Danny Green in like 30 seconds. Oh yeah, Danny Green. And it was huge. It was so close. That was after he retired

and came back or whatever, right? Yeah, but he was still good. He wasn't 58. But you know. 58 years old. Can you imagine? It's crazy. I'm 41. If a 25-year-old who's strong was like was like I'll fight you I'd be like listen, dude. I gotta go I can't I can't strong not you. You're a fucking bitch boy. I'll beat the living shit out of you I'm talking about a strong kid

20 just seen this kid in the fucking gym this morning. Yeah six minutes, and then he went home six minutes pathetic Tony working out and I'm like, let's work out. He goes he does like three things He got on his phone. That's such a generational thing too. You're on your phone the whole fucking time It's not even that hard to figure out but even still it's just it's so funny that he was like, oh I keep looking at the exercises and they were like Cartoon images of like little exercises. I was like, just pick, pick two and do them. I feel like, uh, most 25 year olds, most some are going to be obscenely strong and I don't want to. Sure. I reckon I could fight because

they haven't been hurt enough in life to dig deep enough to get that. They're still going to be worried about how they look and if they're going to get pussy after the fight and they will and they will by the way and they will and you'll win and you won't get laid and he will he will lose a girl be like baby oh beautiful well you need to get it you need to get anger in your life to tap into that to get to a point where you could destroy yeah you need to have had a loss in your belt under your belt You've never lost you never will you never end up in a fight?

No, see that's yeah, you haven't that's I mean if you've never taken on L You don't know where to find the pain of the L. Oh, yeah to win the next fight, dude I got smashed when I was a kid I got a metal plate in my face and six pins and screws all through here They had to rip my I got a scar from there to there where they took my face off took my eye out and had To reconstruct the whole thing what because I got smashed in a park when I was 13 using what fists I just was just yeah, yeah, we don't we don't have Any anything else people here do weapons people definitely use weapons. That's true. Yeah, our fights here

I feel like is definitely glass and whatever the fuck. Yeah, but there's no guns. At least there's no guns. No guns, yeah. Well you could have used a gun back then. Could have used a gun, yeah. So how old were you when your face smashed? 13. Your face, you wouldn't even know that anything ever happened to your face. I've never broken a bone in my body except every bone in my face.

Wow. So from this side over, your head was open. Yeah, they had to... How many people was it? It was this one dude really who, but there was a group of them, but it was one who just wailed and it was one punch too really. Like, uh, cause I had other friends there and it was over pretty quick. Like it wasn't a, hey, let's fight. It was a, I was a smart ass cause obviously, and these, these guy was just bigger and stronger and speak the shit out of me. But yeah, I've got all this all this fucking metal work. Where's he now? Don't know probably in jail, you know Check up on that guy. Yeah, we should remember who it was. Yeah. Yeah. Where are you bud? All right, he's listening He's a huge fan of mine

He's so sick and he's loving it Tell him about our fight again Finally tell him about our fight again money Fuck you fuck you up so bad That is that is that is a terrible injury. Yeah, that's why they had to reconstruct your fucking face I know it doesn't even look like like you're this side of your face doesn't look like anything ever happened No, except when I was about 19. I got that um Bell's palsy thing you seen that where your face just drips. Yeah, because of the surgery I reckon it had to be it was that side and everything yeah yeah and

so for about six weeks I was like that and I like shit I'm gonna be like this forever but it kind of just fixed itself the muscles regained some sort of memory or something yeah if you look up what Bell's palsy is that they don't really know what it is it can happen for like weeks maybe months but it usually fixes itself but it usually fixes itself. Bell's palsy doesn't last forever. No. Can it last forever? Well, I would suck if it did, and some people can have it, but it fixes a little but not fully. John Hefferon, you know, comedian? Yeah. I remember him putting a thing out and I said, dude, I had it, just trust me, I think it'll

work itself out in a few months. Is it neurological? Is that why? It usually resolves itself when it's old, within six months. Six months. So it's a neurological thing that happens, right? It's got to be something with your muscle memory. Yeah, but they don't really have any... I remember the doctors going, look, we don't know why it just happens, but we know that it will fix itself. And it did. Wow. Cause is unknown.

You just wake up one morning and your face is full off think about having a Big night out of drinking and you wake up like that. Yeah, and you're like, what did I do? That's what happened I was drinking all the time. So I just woke up and I was like, oh, this is bad guys We're all laughing and then I'm like, this is not fixing itself and then it's not funny. You know, I got so many logos May this is too far. That's fucking wild Well, look, I want to thank you so much for coming on the show. I appreciate you. We're doing another show tonight. You're on tour all the time.

Plug some dates. Tell people where you are, because I highly recommend my friends to go see you. Whether you're not whether you're in America or not, you're touring constantly. So tell people where you are. I'm finishing off the Australia tour. So I think by the time this comes out, I'll only have a couple of dates left in Australia. And then next year, I'll be back in America doing the regular comedy works.

You will say, you will say. And the comedy store in La Jolla and all the better clubs. La Jolla's great, phenomenal. Zany's in Chicago, you know, all those clubs that I love. You know what's so funny? I'm from Chicago, and I've never headlined Zany's. I've only popped in. Well, it's funny because I started in LA and so Chicago's my home, but I didn't start in Chicago.

So people were like, oh, did you start at Zany's? Like I didn't. When I went home, I can pop into Zany's, but by the time that I was touring in Chicago, I went back, I played the Schomburg Improv. Oh yeah, I did that one. I did the Improv Circuits. Yep.

And then, so that was not downtown. And then downtown at the time, they opened up a Laugh Factory, Jamie asked me to go and do that, so I went and did that. But when I would go home, I had this anxiety about it, so I only do one-offs. Like, I don't know how you feel about performing back home, but like, in your hometown, but I wouldn't do a weekend, other than the Schomburg one. I just want to do like one show and go Yeah, I wouldn't do a weekend. I'm doing one show back in Melbourne. It's it'll be the biggest one

I've ever done at the Haimer Hall big beautiful. It's like the Sydney Opera House in Melbourne. It's I thought it was hammer beautiful It's not hammer. That's all right. Is it not the hammer? Hall hammer? Yeah, it's right on the water Yeah, I know I stayed there when I was living there. I stayed right there, right on the water. And I walked past it every single fucking day. It was so funny. And I love that city so much. I can't say enough good things about Melbourne. I know you hate it, but you're from there.

I don't hate it. I know. It's my hometown. So I'm like, all right. It's hard to. I know it on a deeper level than you do. And it's a love-hate relationship. I love it so much.

I love it more than I hate it. I just had so much fun. It was just like fantasy town and on that water So it's just I don't know actually it's a bit like Chicago like that. Yeah running through. Oh, yeah Well, we have a lake a huge lake a lake. That's didn't see that didn't see that big fuck-off lake. Yeah Can't see the other side. It's so fucking big What is it called? The Yarra Yarra River? Yarra. Just run. The Yarra River. Yarra River. Yeah, that's great. I had so much fun. I can't wait to go back down there. Go see Monty Franklin.

MontyFranklin.com? Yeah. MontyFranklin.com. Good thing, because sometimes guys get websites that are like, Monty Franklin is the funniest guy alive.com. And I'm like, okay, just get the regular one. Just pay the guy 80 bucks to buy the real one. Yeah, buy your name. Buy your name back. Go to MontyFranklin.com, check him out on social media and all that good stuff. We end the show the same way.

Fuck it. You say, yeah, well, if you want to. Look at the camera and say one word or one phrase to end the episode. A word or a phrase of wisdom if you have one to end the episode whenever you're ready. Hold on one second. Words of wisdom. Um... Penis. Fuck.

Perfect. Panic. In here, we pour whiskey. Whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey. Oh, that creature in the ginger beard. Sturdy and ginger. Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful.

You owe me five dollars for the whiskey and seventy-five dollars for the horse. Gingers are hell known. This whiskey is excellent. The ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me five dollars for the whiskey, and seventy-five dollars for the horse. Gingers are hell no. This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.