Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep190 - Risk!

Episode Date: January 26, 2020

Remember Kevin Allison from that show The State? Me neither. I do, however, remember Michael Ian Black, David Wain, Michael Showalter, Kerri Kenney-Silver, Robert Ben Garant, Thomas Lennon, and Joe Lo Truglio. Unfortunately none of those people have anything to do with this terrible podcast hosted by Kevin Allison. Andeeee joins the show to recap Delvin Cox's interview with Patrick Michael, Opie's clickbait episode, and Stuttering John's ongoing failures as a podcaster and person. Also, PJ sends in his best work to-date. Oh, and Vic is back.  http://bit.ly/watp-patreon Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Slapper Rooney. So a big shout out to who are these podcasts. Thanks for the... Jesus. I'm gonna end up being in their intro music. Showtime. W-L-A-T-P! W-A-T-P! W-A-T-P!

Hello, bag slappers and cousin ruse. Welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts. The only place where Patrick Michael gets laughs. I'm your host, Carl. With me this week, it's Joe's brother Andy. Yeah, let's talk shit. Go to WhoAreThese.com to get our email address, voice mail number, link to our subordinate,

link to the discord server, link to our merchandise, and of and of course the link to our patreon where you can support the show Hmm, oh, yeah, I'm speaking of supporting the show Carl. Hey look at you We're in the W ATP merchandise if you can't wear it here. Where can you wear it? I feel like a really big piece of shit because I should be giving that to you. You should be buying it Hey, I support this show. You do. I love this show. In many ways. It's hours of entertainment.

All right. I'll tell you the least I could do. Well, you're a part of the show, so we appreciate that, Andy. And I do want to say that we're going to do a bonus episode. This week, I'm going to record it Tuesday, put it out on Wednesday, probably. I'm also supposed to go on Drew and Mike on Wednesday. It's going to be a busy week, but I'm excited about it because Stuttering John did this whole thing

with that woman from Radio Gunnk. I saw that. And he like watched his wedding video. Oh, did you see any of that? I didn't listen to that now. Okay. I think Krojan and I are gonna go through the Stuttering John debacle

that is him watching his wedding video. Fantastic. And aside from that, I'm excited to say, I teased this months ago and have done nothing with it. My brother found old rap songs every quarter when I was pre-pubescent. Ah! And we're gonna listen to those as well.

That's amazing. You're gonna hear Master K, which was my rap name, back when I was 10. You're gonna hear Master K, which was my rap name, back when I was 10. You're gonna hear Master K on the mic. So please get over to Patreon and support the show for five bucks a month. You can hear all these crazy things that we're talking about.

Also, we encourage our listeners to give us a five-star review and iTunes and shut all of us in the comments section where we'll be doing our new segment later today where Vic reads our shitty reviews and Andy and I try to guess how many stars that reviewer gave us. Oh yeah. Before we do that, we'll be reviewing a podcast

called Risk. This is a suggestion from Andy. Yeah. We have both listened to the show separately. We have not discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it. This is a show that's hosted by Kevin Ellison. And Kevin Ellison is known from being a member of the state,

which was a sketch comedy show on MTV, where many of the people from that show went on to create tons of movies and TV shows that we love. Correct. Kevin Ellison is not one of them. Yes, you got Michael Ian Black, who's on the Jim Gaffergid show. Lots of people from Reno 9-1-1, John Lutrrulyos from Brooklyn 9-9-9 or 9-9. And you know, Kevin Allison is from this podcast. Right. He's got me. This podcast and a bunch of Asian guys from what I understand. Fair enough. According to him, you know, and his words. And I will tell you that

this guy is the laziest podcaster in the history of podcasting because what this show is is Kevin going, we're doing a show, I'll play a quick clip of that where he laughs as he talks as if that makes it funny. It's not a joke just because you're laughing while you're talking, Duffy. But before that, it is January the year 2020. This dude is fucking corny. What's funny about it's 2020? What's funny about it? How did Dan think? He goes on to talk about their Patreon and he has to be all sing-songy about it. I fucking hate this. So we're gonna keep it running as long as we possibly can. Why don't you help us out by going to patreon.com slash risk that's P-A-T-R-E-O-N dot com slash risk.

So this dude, yeah, this dude's a corn ball and he does these quick reads at the beginning in the middle at the end and everything else is totally different people. It's all far out. It's all of the content. Right, right. And they're just telling stories usually in front of the live audience. They, I mean, we'll get into it. The whole business model. They have all business model. Oh, well, that is white. Wait. I mean, this is what I do. It's no secret that I don't like UCB stuff. Because I feel like

it's a money grab. You get people that think they're going to learn how to be funny. Something that can't really be taught. And then you have these people saying, oh, give me, you know, X amount of dollars and I'll teach you how to be funny. That's basically what this show is. If you want to, this is called Money Grab Story Studio. Step one. If you go to thestorystudio.org, click on learn in person and click on Los Angeles. There you will find the workshop sign up for it. So you can go and learn how to be boring at a party. I know what the

fuck it is. And then clip two. This is what you this is what you get when you go to the story studio. You might end up workshopping a story in that workshop that ends up being featured on the show out there in Los Angeles. You might be a total newcomer to storytelling or you might be someone who has been working on a story for a little while and wants some good feedback from a whole room full of people. Check that out at thestorystudio.org. So I checked it out. Yeah. It's $150 for a two day class for level one. For the low, low price of $150, you can learn how to structure your boring life into a story. People

will pretend to get a phone call in the middle of you telling it so they can walk away. You're right. I know. I thought that was interesting that this whole premise of learning how to be a storyteller, but get up in front of people and talk for 18 minutes at a time, it's like TED, TED talks, for people who don't have anything to say. Right, that have no intelligence, they don't have a profound thought in their head.

So instead they go up and tell some fucking mundane story that usually has zero payoff to it. Yeah, let's say I'm not a musician, but I want to be in front of a microphone. I'm not funny, so I can't write a joke. Right. So maybe the David Crab can teach me how to be a storyteller for $150.

Let me give you a quick example of one of the people they have on here telling a story. And listen to how nervous she sounds in her voice. This is something I always pick up on because I do a ton of public speaking, as you know. And I've trained myself to talk normal. Measured, yeah. Very measured and normal. You don't want to get up there and change the way you talk just because you're in front of people.

You can hear this woman breathing so hard she's freaking out So this is what you get from learning how to be a storyteller, but wait it gets worse that woman you just heard is a teacher And she teaches storytelling for the story studio out there in Minneapolis. She's got a two-day workshop coming up on January 25th and 26th. Just go to thestorystudio.org, click on Learn in person and click on Minneapolis and there's the dates. You would be hard pressed to find a better storytelling teacher than Amy. You know why it'd be hard to find a better one? Because that's not a class! There's not teachers to tell you how to tell a story! Who's trying to learn this? Well, other alert, she says in her story that she's basically unemployable.

And this is what she does for a living. There you go! Hey, have no skills that are marketable whatsoever. Want to get to teach people how to tell a story? Something that we all know how to deal. Maybe. All right, so this is the beginning of the show. There's always a tease. Yeah, to let you know that there's some great stories and the typical episode has three different story tellers, three different stories, runs about an hour long. And this is how it starts off. Hey folks, this is Kevin. On this week's episode of Riskyl here, Rosemary Cipriano.

The Little Mermaid had an excellent rack, and Prince Eric loved her. That and more. Alright, so there's no contacts to this. You just hear this woman talking about the little mermaid's tits. Can't wait. Yeah. Side me up. I can't get to that story fast enough.

Let's go. Did we listen to the same episode? Did you listen to... I listened to your episode that we talked about, but I also listened to a few other ones. I pulled most of my clips from the most recent episode. I see. So I think it was called Substitutes.

Okay. Or something like that. You listen to whammy, right? Correct. Yeah, is there anything? So I found this show to be difficult to clip. Yeah. Because you have these little segments where this guy does his ad reads and laughs through sentences.

And then outside of that, there's an 18-minute-long story that's sometimes fun and funny, like the one example, there was like a comedian who talked about getting fingered by a masseuse. Correct. Which was fun. Yeah. that's sometimes fun and funny, like the one example, there was like a comedian who talked about getting fingered by a masseuse. Correct.

Which was fun. Yeah. Enjoyed that. Yeah. It's good. I don't have any clips. That's fine. What are you- How do you have no clips?

So many clips. I'm so weird. No, I don't clip from that. I have no clips from that story. Oh, we'll play my clip three. This is- This is a story about a woman getting fingered in a massage parlor.

Let's hear- Let's hear how that's- Just a massage parlour. Let's hear that story. Let's hear that story. All right, let's hear the story. And I had nothing going on that day. And so I walked through the Santa Monica promenade and it was fully decorated for Christmas. There's garlands everywhere, a tree. All the minstrels are singing Christmas carols.

I don't know if you can call them minstrels anymore. Buskers is like a slur, I don't know. But minstrels, they were performing. and it was like bestive holiday cheer crowds everywhere And I was like, ugh, and it was nice, but it was a little chaotic and so I be lined to the spot Is this what you teach at the story studio? A bunch of mud and details get to the hand job What is that what do I care? It's a good boy.

I don't even know how I stuck three with to get to the hand job, partner. Also, and you want to keep going on this story? Sure, well, no, this is the guy. This is the guy. She describes the masseuse. Let's hear this. He's like this Spanish-Slashtitalian.

And he has long black hair pulled back into a low bun. And just to give you a vision And even I'm getting turned down is that really because she never said the guys hot it could be anybody I'm the picturing Shrek getting a massage from donkey with a with a ponytail You understand when she said Spanish slash Italian, which is by the way wildly offensive that means a hot guy Oh, it does. Yeah you're a pig. You know hot. That is the problem with this. You hear it's kind of like got some tintillating details. Yeah. And you're predisposed to think that the people involved are hot.

Y'all right. That's not. This woman's not hot. This guy wasn't hot. Also, it's pretty much a sexual assault. It is. It is a sexual assault. If a guy was telling this story, yes. He would be booed, doxed, and then a citizen or rest, that story studio.

He would have been walked out in handcuffs from the stories you know. We'll take the 150 bucks. Okay, now please, you're a derrace. Speaking of people not being attractive the one woman that I pointed out before is actually a teacher talks about her story and she almost gets this correct just one word is off. I felt like my body was this bizarre, distant planet? I gained 60 pounds. So the only thing wrong about that is you said

the word distant. All right, let's get back to your fingering story. Andy, what do you mean? No, I don't know. I mean, let's see, clip six. And I have this realization. I'm like, okay. He will make a really good boyfriend. He knows exactly what he is doing.

Like his mouth and hands are all over my body. Like he knows my body bit of that. I do at this point. Like, so the guy that you just met that goes down on strangers' money. Right, would be a great boyfriend. Like, where's your self esteem? He's always my soul mate.

I can't wait. I can't, I wonder how many skanks he's eating out right now. Yeah, it's like dating a stripper. Like, hey, how was work, honey? A little sore, I don't wanna hear that. God damn it. Let me just go who's on. Yeah.

Good. Let's, let's plow through everything else you got with the story while we're on a boat. But I mean, that's really that. It's so many, but you know what, this reminded me of those paint-to-pine things where 40-year-old women go and drink wine and... Painting with a twist.

Yeah, I've done that. Yeah, it was a work about it. I feel like all of these stories are something that happens after old ladies have to had too much to drink. Yes. Especially the second one. Okay.

This is about a woman that got a phone call from her hairdresser's psychic. Yes. It's just unbelievable. If somebody cornered me at a work event and started telling this story. Right. I would just jump out a fucking window Do you have any what do you want? Why do you start this one off? Carried all right, let me start it off because just like you said this woman Betsy is her name Is a fucking retarded well. Yeah, she has her hairdresser call up and say, hey, I'm at my mediums house and my medium is being contacted by your mom and then later your

dad. Right? And I just want to point out that this is horse shit. Okay, there's this thing as mediums. This is the thing as people communicate through a dead person communicates to live people through a fucking medium. It's been proven time and time again. Right. It's ridiculous. And this woman had a very tumultuous relationship with her father. It didn't end well. So the medium says, Oh,

guess what? Your dad's coming in. Hold on. He has something to tell you. So I said, what does my father want? And the medium said, what does my father want?" And the medium said, your father wants to tell you how very sorry he is that he was so mean to you.

And he wants to tell you what a great mom you've been to your son. And he wishes that he had been a better father to you. That's it? Wow. Okay, let me explain something here. When you say, oh, you're talking to my dead, dead, what does he say? Everyone knows that every woman has daddy issues. So it's very easy to say he wants to apologize

He was a bad father. Yeah, this is how they make their money. They tell you what you want to hear right? They tell you exactly what my dad admits that he was wrong and I was right When can I get another appointment with you to talk to him some more? I want to hear more about how great I am Yeah, oh, yeah It doesn't medium find out something about you sitting in a chair at a hair salon where all they do all day long is Talk shit about each other right he probably overheard all of that 20 minutes prior to saying oh I I have a message coming in from beyond Oh, do you isn't about my friend? I just told you all about yeah, you think maybe she talks about her dad from time to time

You think that maybe comes up. Hey play my clip 11 this? Oh, go ahead. I'm sorry. I got to put this clip next to it. Yes. Because at just she explains that my dad was the worst person, but then I just heard this one thing through this fucking asshole who said he was a bad person. She comes to this conclusion. And then I was struck by the thought that death isn't the end, that people can actually continue to grow and learn and change, make a man's, connect with their loved ones and guide them. Well, that's retarded. What kind of stupid horseshit is that? Her takeaway is that you can be a terrible person on your life Die being a terrible person. Yeah, and then make a man's death in the fact even religious

Zealot still talk about show like that's so stupid It's like any sense. Yeah, I hope you become a better person ever you die. Yeah, it's not gonna happen It's so funny, but let's hear why she had such a bad relationship with her father, like Clip 11, it's her going to see her dad on his deathbed. Yeah, and I just want to point out that everyone's the hero in their own story. Right.

So of course, it's all extremes all the time. I'm sure this is embellished, but whatever. What are you doing here? And then he looked around the room and he said, and where's your husband? Did you lose another one? Yeah, actually he's on her second divorce according to her dad. She's like, what was that loser you married? Did he finally get sick of fucking a burlap sack full of

rat and pumpkins? Get out of here bitch. Yeah according to her she had to take off work fly to Florida to be with him on his deathbed, and he's just like, hey, you fucking suck, get out of here! And she goes home and cries. That's the story, I'm like, okay, whatever. But it's all forgiven because this dummy thinks that dole's talk to dead people. Right. Which, it's all better now.

Yeah, makes sense. Clip 12 is the moral of this story. Today is my 27th wedding anniversary. Thank you. And I thank my brother, my dear brother Anthony, who guided me to this wonderful man. And hey, dad, see, I didn't lose another one. My husband's right here.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's four people in the audience. Oh, I know. Fuck you, Dad. I'm not a boring hag. I piss on your grave. I know. I was like, kill your fucking daddy, as you say. That's why you told that whole story. Also, in that story, is her dead brother came to her while she was driving to Vermont, so for possibly. And said, hey, that guy you just met at the store,

go back and talk to him again. And that's how she met her husband. This woman's life is chaos. She has voices in her fucking head. They should definitely lock her up and straight with a straight jacket after this fucking story she tells. Right. And I feel like they say that this is her first story

that she ever told. How many hundreds of dollars did she spend at the studio before they're like, we better let her get on stage and tell one of these or else she's not gonna sign up for any more classes. Yeah, there's definitely a racket that's going on. They have classes in LA, Minneapolis, or St. Paul, and New York City, and they host live shows that they do. Yeah. And this fucking Kevin Ellison guy, the lazyest podcast in the history of podcasting, doesn't even host the LA ones.

Yeah. He has a different host for the, like, that's what I want to do. I want to start a podcast. I don't have to be involved in it. People other people just do it for me. You hear this Doug and Kaya? Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Little foreshadowing right there. All right, I love this part right here because he starts to talk about a story that they have ready to go, but he's holding off on it. Okay. All right. A lot of people have been emailing me to ask when there was a story told at our Austin Texas show a few months back.

It's the second story we'll run on the subject of cannibalism. We will have that story on the show soon, but we want to make it a very special episode because if you're a wrist listener, you know that one of the things that we've struggled with for over 10 years now is that we get very, very, very little recognition from the media the press the you know People whenever people are writing what podcast you should be checking out

10 years dude that's fucking retarded right? The guy goes we're just not getting the recognition that we should be getting! We're such a great podcast and nobody talks about how we're one of the best podcasts and one you should all let's do. It's because you're not very good. Yeah, it's because your podcast isn't very good. A bunch of crying cry babies. Wait, don't I have a drop for that I think somewhere? Your podcast stinks somewhere your podcast stinks

Your podcast stinks It's not very good, but this guy's got it all figured eyes. I've been doing this for 10 years His podcast is what it is. They have some listeners. It's not that great They have they make them like for grand on patreon. Oh, yeah They have a book that you can buy for some reason that takes these stories and now you have to fucking read these boring ass stories with mediums and shit but he's got a whole strategy and how he's gonna get the show out there. He's holding off on this cannibal story after 1100 episodes. He knows that the cannibal story is gonna be amazing. He's not gonna put it out there.

Yeah, he's got an idea. We're an indie podcast, so we're not connected to some big corporation, like, you know, so many of them are, where they'll have a lot of money for marketing and connections to get the word out about their podcasts. So we're hoping to put that cannibalism start, because it truly is just an astounding story. That's why so many people keep emailing us asking, when is it gonna be on, when is it gonna be on?

We're hoping to put that on an episode with maybe a celebrity or just, you know, a couple of other really jaw-dropping knock you out stories and we're hoping to alert as much of the press and influencers, hey, you've gotta check out this episode because it's, you're just not gonna hear this kind of stuff anywhere else. All right, so, Kevin, you've been doing this

a lot longer than I have. That's not how podcasting works. You don't put out one episode, have a giant PR release around it, and that PR release, what the fuck am I talking about? Have a whole press release around it, and then all of a sudden, everyone knows about your show. It's a pro consistently good shows. Yeah. That's how people learn about a podcast. What we're going to do is we're going to get one celebrity guest on here and then

we'll talk about cannibalism and all of a sudden we're going to blow up overnight. Yeah. No, the show's still going to suck. Next week's show's going to be the same boring nonsense that we're used to it. By the way, when they don't know how to describe something, because it's not that entertaining, you'll notice he said jaw dropping in there. I fucking hate that. the same boring nonsense that we used to. By the way, when they don't know how to describe something, be it is not that entertaining, you'll notice he said jaw dropping in there. I fucking hate that. It's jaw dropping.

I was reading through their website, and I kept seeing that as a description of these stories. You will believe these jaw dropping stories. So I did a little thing where you can search on Google and figure out how many times a phrase is used on a website. 56 pages of this website have the words jaw dropping on it. 56 pages. There's so much jaw dropping going on.

I just can't believe it. My dad was mean to me. What? Jaw dropping. Oh my God. How much of it was I rolling? It's mostly I rolling. That's good. All right. So Kevin again, being the corn ball that he is, is doing a stamps.com

read because of course they have all the generic sponsors on this show. Oh this poor indie podcast. Yeah. Oh, we just, you know, we don't have the big marketing dollars behind this stuff. I just have a bunch of celebrity friends that come on and we have tons of sponsors What was you? Why don't you have a fire? Agra. Yeah, he's got fire agron there So this is the stamps.com read and this cornboat can't possibly think this is funny But he laughs and go to stamps.com instead. There's no risk with our promo code risk Instead, there's no risk with our promo code risk. What?

Why? Who is that for? It's, what is this show for? It's not funny. Every show does that. You're supposed to do that. So people, the sponsors realize where the buyer came from, how they found, you know.

But he used the word risk twice. That's why he was laughing. There's no risk when you use the word risk. Wow. So when I hear stuff like that, I immediately picture the target audience of the podcast. And I think, oh, this is for boring people, probably housewives whose husband is having an affair. And don't have a lot of connection with people or get to have conversations with friends because nobody likes them. Yeah, but then I hear shit like this where this guy is going on his story and he's really painting a picture here. And I scribe five pages double-sided of the most vitriolic bile I could dredge up from

the bottom of my soul man. Just it was just this massive reach for rants. Just like you fucking come, you fucking me up, you fucking you need to fucking just fucking you fucking asshole, just on and on and on. Just, just, hmm. What a wordsmith, right? He must have heard that storytelling class. So fortunately, this Cornballulk cabin does say this. If you're new to risk, you should know that the podcast can be very uncensored. So this is where I'm not sure what's going on. Is it shocking?

Are you supposed to hear our upbombs every two seconds? Or are we laughing at the promo code is risk? And you're gonna know risk trial. Which is it? It can'tey both. And it's all of it. It's none of it is what it is. This is a show for nobody.

And I want to point out, I was reading through some of the reviews at iTunes and I thought this one was hilarious because this gives you an idea of who the audience is. This is a person eight years listening exclamation point, three stars. All right, this person is listening for eight years. Give me a three stars.

And what Jeremy R says is, really love this show and has taken me on so many personal journeys and has made a real impact in my life. I'm leaving this review to leave a crucial piece of feedback. The six minute intro before every episode is really off putting for me and a lot of people I've tried to put on to the show. I understand advertising is the way you make money and also ask me for

other form to support. But can you all shorten the 6 plus minute intro before the stories? 99% of the reason I listen to the episodes is for the stories. Not for Kevin's jokes. I love Kevin's stories but the awkward singing and rambling too much. I've listened to every episode available. I just skip over the intro's an interstitial day this and the interstitial day this point. I don't know what that means. Yes! You can skip over it! It's the last two! It's the last two! I'm like, oh, this is a newbie. He doesn't know how podcasts, writers work. And there's like, you don't have to do it. That's a skip six minutes.

I'm like, can you roll us in a Joe Rogan. Yeah, that's what you do Like everyone does I understand that this is how you make your money, but I don't understand how the fast forward button works Fucking moron and that's so obnoxious. I've been an eight-year-lister to the show three stars I was in the other thing of episode three stars. Wait. Why you give me three stars? This thing I could easily get around is annoying I do every time. Jesus Christ. This is so fucking annoying with their criticisms. Well people are stupid.

Keep it to your fucking self here. People are stupid, specifically people who listen to risk the podcast. I want to be told a story. Somebody tell me a story. What do we fucking seven? Yeah. Yeah. What do you five? You want to hear a story? What do we fucking seven? Yeah. Yeah, Florida team.

What do you have five? Do you want to hear a story? What do you go to bed? Get talked in. What do you hear a story before you get talked in? So here's a story. Here's your warm milk. Here's a story that starts off

with this woman explaining how she has one boob. So I was born without my left peck. So my left breast just never grew. She stayed a quiet, barely there a cup while my right one flourished into a gravity-defying D-Cop. Why would I want to hear that story? Hey, let me tell you for the next 22 minutes about how I grew up with one boob. Hard pass?

All of these are fucking people that need therapy. You should be telling this to a therapist and the privacy of an office. I mean, it's got to be the same amount of money as it does to take a class at the story studio, or $150 an hour. It's probably less to talk to a therapist and not annoy everybody with all your crybaby fucking problems. It's everybody's crybaby problems, man. All your crybaby problems. So this is the exciting conclusion to the woman who was born with one breast. So you would think there'd be something profound. And my thought was, this woman's telling this story.

She's gonna talk about how you accept your body, and how you love who you are, and other people will love who you are, when you love who you are. This is the conclusion to her story. I want to tell everybody in the world that I have fake boobs. I tell everybody, anyone that crosses crosses my path every guy I've ever slothed with knows even if it was a one-night stand they know. They are lucky to have been with a girl who has fake boobs and has a perfect rack. You're lucky.

Oh great. I was born with this terrible disorder that most people don't have and I had to leave with that and not with slot. Wee! Great! What a great moral the story that is! So wait, I can just get surgery and feel better about myself. Yeah, let's all do that! Hey, I haven't seen him yet. Want to come over? Well, it's fun to you say that because at one point she's talking about her boob so much that I'm getting into it a little bit. This part of the story was just a little bit of pudding. I kind of shriveled up. And he opened up the surgical bra and I looked down and I saw that I had two boobs and they were

there and they were even and they were perfect. They may have been a little bloody and they may have been all bruised at the moment. They may have been scarred, but they were my boobs, and I loved them so much. You did it. You did it. Get your gross boobs out of here. Oh! Like Richard Christie. Oh!

Oh! Fucking gross. I wanna hear what your bloody fucking boobs, you asshole. So I had a period of my boobs. I-I'm not-what's the next story? So I'll talk to a medium about their dad. Great. Let's hear that. I'm lactating blood and pus. I want to see him. God. Fuck me. These poor people. Here's another clip about how lazy Kevin is. In case it couldn't get lazier, they're putting out two podcasts a week. Do you know about this? No. So there have this special episode that they do

that's just one story. Ooh. It must be good one. No. Not if it costs. That was no bunch of them. No, listen to this. I'm Kevin Allison and every Thursday

we release these special episodes that we're calling classic risk singles. Each of these episodes features just one story from our earlier years. So he's putting out stories that they've already put out on the podcast again, and repackaging. We're doing two shows a week. Should I just fucking do this?

It's accelerated. Hey, yeah, right. Hey, today on the podcast, we'll be reviewing We're Alive. Okay. I just fucking play that again. We'll see if we won't even know. No. All right.

And by the way, back in the, so they started doing the show, I don't know, 10 years ago. And back then, they didn't have the fucking storytelling studios and the whole racket that they were doing. So they actually did it not in front of a live audience, but like a podcast would do with production. So here's an example of that. This guy's telling the story where he went to this gay spiritual retreat in Ohio to get in touch with spirituality. And they had names like Dionyses and Shadow Wolf and Star Dancer.

And the guys looked a little different than me. They had Mohawks and crazy ear piercings and pentagram tattoos. And I realized I'd ended up in gay pagan witch camp. So there's production there, but it doesn't make any fucking sense. He said this spiritual retreat and they're playing circus music. Right. He's like it's gay pagan witch camp.

I was like, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, I don't think, wait, wait. Is there a circus in town about a carnival? What are you talking about? It's all very confused. I said he wanted to get in touch with spirituality. I wanted to say how old was he? Boo!

Moving on. Moving on. All right, Andy, what else you got out here, buddy? Well, you know, we talked about that woman that was the teacher at the beginning, so they get into her story, which is another one of these, like the woman with the boob job. I have a health problem that everybody needs to be made aware of. So I bind as well, getting in front of a microphone, and it's just one not such a happy ending,

but Trek 13, she's kind of setting it up. So no one could believe that David and I were a couple because I was on the far end of extroverted, loquacious, loud, I was a theater major, I was loud. Yeah no one could believe it. Wow with that voice. You're right. I don't believe it. This tracks. Yep. Jesus is woman's voice. She's not fun to listen to or to look at for that matter, which are two things you have to do when someone's presenting live on stage in front of you. Yeah, I read her bio, she's fighting against bullying Carl. Is she?

Yeah, it's probably not gonna be too happy about this. How are you fucking serious? Oh no! No! I just made fun of her for being the title of a planet. She's fighting, it's bullying? Oh fuck. 28. This whole thing is...

Should I just enter the address of my company so she can try to get me fired? I just like make it easy for her. This whole, all these stories. This whole thing is just like, hey, let's all Congratulate each other Let's back up because this is what I think this story studio bullshit is all about okay The audience you can hear on some of these things the smattering of applause that has got to be

Just nine other storytellers waiting to tell their stories. It's like a open mic. Yeah, so let's hear and Clip nine, okay, I put this is what storytellers are all tell their stories. It's like an open mic. So let's hear, and clip nine. I put, this is what storytellers are all about. And I met this incredibly charming handsome man named Brad. And we struck up a conversation and we really hit it off, but then we just won our separate ways. So I took my brother's advice and I went back to the store and I

made contact with Brad and he asked me out and we've been together ever since. Really powerful. Thank you. Thank you. All I want is that little bit of recognition from somebody to tell me that what I'm doing with my life is okay. And there's so much of that in the hot ass of reassurance. Yes, and that's the audience's job is to reassure that the people that are on stage are so fucking brave. And for putting their feelings that nobody wants to hear about out there for everybody to have to pay attention to. And then my clip 16 is sort of the audience fucking that up and getting this wrong. The woman with the annoying voice is just like, oh, and they're telling me that I have this incurable disease and

that I should just get used to it. So let's hear the audience reaction to that. I think about it all the time, whether I can stop being angry and instead be grateful for my fucked up dysfunctional body, that somehow despite everything is still here, is still surviving. I know, I know. Yeah, yeah, we were like, she was waiting for something to be like, okay, this is good. still surviving. I know. I know. Yeah. Yeah. We were like, she was waiting for something to be like, okay, this is good.

It's like it never comes to that point. She's like, I hate myself. They're like, you go girl. I hate your body too. Yeah, the conclusion of this story was and I'll never be cured. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Fuck. Do they not teach storytelling? Like there needs to be an arc and a conclusion. Like, when I come up with something, she's like, and tomorrow we'll live it all over again. Like, wait, what?

Right. I mean, yeah, all right. You did it. We feel bad for you. Congratulations. I don't give a shit. Sorry. Well, speaking of, um, Kevin, were we talking about Kevin?

Yeah. Let's get back to Kevin. This fucking guy is looking to make money every possible way. He's got the Patreon, he's got the other business model. You can take classes, you can go to live shows. He's doing ad reads nonstop, but he's got a new scheme that he needs to tease. It hasn't even happened yet, but he can't wait to tell you about it. Now in a couple of days, I am going to be dropping a very special announcement about ways that you,

risk listeners, can be connecting with me. Giving me money, I'm an Allison. So stay tuned about that. I'm making new opportunities available for one-on-one coaching, training, mentoring, chit-chatting. There's a very exciting platform. He's going to be on some platform that I have to pay for to talk to him through. And he's for mentoring and one-to-one's like, you're the only guy who didn't have a career after the state. Every other person I followed their career, it's impressive. Why am I gonna need mentoring from this guy?

Kevin, how do I make my dad molesting me funny? Can you help me give a mentor to that? Hey, Kevin, how do I do a podcast where I do zero work? And then bitch about how nobody listens to it. And we're not getting picked up by the mainstream press. How do I pull that off where I do zero work and then bitch about how nobody listens to it and we're not getting picked up by the mainstream press How do I pull that off? I'd love to know. Hey Kevin my grandfather made me shoot my own dog. How is that funny? No, you go. Yeah And then just one last thing I want to play for some reason He doesn't ad read for another podcast

Which usually if you're on a network that kind of thing happens I'm not sure why this happened. I don't know if this podcast paid for it But listen to how fucking boring the premise of this podcast is like it's like The world sees Canada as a peaceful place with wide open spaces and polite friendly people that's mostly true, but there is another side to the Great White North, a side filled with horrific crimes and dark history. Dark Poutine is a weekly true crime podcast with two ordinary connox. They chat about crimes, the country's dark history and mysteries, they explore some of Canada's most infamous cases, and dig deep into little known ones from unsolved mysteries to paranormal

activity they cover it all. God fucking dammit. So what's the difference between that and every other podcast? Well we live in Canada. That's the difference. That's that's your ankle. You know, it's your great podcast where they read a Wikipedia article and then they like go on

and on for hours about all the information they write on Wikipedia. It's gotta be. Yeah, yeah, I know that's nonsense. Yeah, we have that one and those two, but what we live in Canada. Okay, cool. I live in New York State. Who gives a shit. Why does that make any difference? Yeah. People can't get enough of it, man. They can't. That's the problem. That's why I'm angry. Right. I wouldn't be angry if those podcasts weren't getting more downloads than mine. Yeah. The day they come out before, I didn't even heard about it. Right. True Crime in Canada.

Download, download, subscribe, subscribe. You can't fucking wait for it. I know. We talked about it. Carol's like, well, what should we do? And I said, well, I know this other true crime podcast is terrible, but I just can't do it with true crime anymore. I just can't. We were gonna do Sorn's Scale this week.

Right. And we went back and forth because Sorn's Scale's a huge show, one that we need to tackle at some point. Yeah, we could do it eventually, but. We need to do it at some point. But you're right. It's, they're all the fucking sex. It's exhausting.

And it's exhausting. What's funny about this is people are just explaining a horrendous crime for these crime porn addicts who have to jerk off about people being dismembered. Yeah, I don't get it. Oh, they got it worse than I do, so it makes me feel better about myself. And if you wanna buy a Hope Security Sist

and use the promo code. Carl's Crazy Crime Stories. Coming soon, coast hosting by Vec. Carl's Crazy Crime. Alright, I'm all out of clips, Andy. Where else you got, buddy? Clip Play at Clip 15. This one is what's her name with the annoying voice as the life of the party.

Alright. This one is what's her name with the annoying voice as the life of the party. All right. I was rocking back and forth and sobbing like a crazy person out of desperation to have something, some of this, and David was a few feet away and I said, David, we're gonna get one light bulb, okay? We're gonna get one bulb! David would come home from his job and say, Amy, did you go to work today? Did you call and sit again, Amy, you have to earn an income and I would say I'm absorbing the light, David!

I'm absorbing the light, okay God! Jesus, why are you telling me this? Who wants to listen to this? What's this bullshit? Can I get my money back? Can you get your money back from Kevin Ellison? It's such bullshit. Oh, God.

I can't imagine. I got a babysitter. I went out for the night. I'm going to see a show. I sit down and it's this. I don't know who's entertained by this. No. Like, hey, you know that person that work you avoid

because they're going to tell you their life story? You're forced to listen to that person now. You and everybody else, like, fuck! I get corner of the cafeteria as it is. I'm trying to get the fuck out of them from these types of people. Exactly. Hey, did I ever tell you about the time when I had lupus

Oh, fuck. Yes, you did But go ahead what else happens? So I just found out that my dad as diabetes are gonna have to cut off both his feet I wasn't the other one I didn't clip it at all But this guy talks about when he was growing up with his friends They used to be unsupervised and they would play in this alleyway by a busy street and the one kid was chasing a tire into the road and had his leg broken and bones were popping out. They found needles and syringes and they were throwing him at each other and one went in the the kids eye. They were playing with car batteries

and acid fell out on the kids face and turned his black skin white. He was going through all these fucking stories. I'm like, why would I want to listen to this? And the conclusion was, this person died trying to rob a pawn shop. This person's in jail for life. This person beat up his girlfriend. I'm like, okay, what am I gaining from any of these stories?

I don't think they're real. I don't think any of this shit's real. That's all fucking made up. But why are we listening to this? Who is this for? Right. Well, and that was one of the best stuff since they had to bring back. We played this back in 2014 But you you guys got to hear it again. Do I? It's depressing. Oh, man. I guess I don't have it so bad. I guess I don't wanna have it so bad. I guess you don't. Things could be worse. I mean, I am out of beer, but. All right.

All right, I'll get you a beer. I haven't as bad as a kid that got battery acid thrown in his face. My beer is empty. You might as well put battery acid on me. You want one of these guys? Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, there's gotta be better things to talk about.

I think there should move on to more fun topics. Oh yeah, you think there's better things to talk about? You think there's things like this? Don't tell me if you don't like my show. Don't tell me if you don't like my show. Don't tell me... Don't tell me if you don't like my show. Don't tell me. Don't tell me if you don't like my show. Don't tell me if you don't like my show.

Don't tell me. Because that's absurd. I am very excited about these next clips we're gonna play. Yes. Because there's a show called The Delvin Cox Experience. Go to thedelvincoxexperience.com, check out everything that Delvin Cox is up to. He had an interview with our friend Patrick Michael.

Oh yeah! It's not even out yet. I got an advanced copy. Delvin, I'm sorry buddy. I hope I'm not playing this when I shouldn't be playing it. I can't help it. I listened to it earlier this week. I sent it to Andy.

He's listened to it. The cool part was, it's an hour long. Yeah. The first half hour is relatively boring, although there's some things we could talk about. Yeah. But there's too much. So I didn't point anything from that.

The second half of the show, I supplied some questions to ask Patrick Michael that that Delvin asked him, which was great. Yeah. And then my buddy podcast hitman, which is at podcast underscore hitman on Twitter. Yeah. Also, supply some questions. Right. To ask, um, my questions were much nicer. My questions were much nicer. Yeah, it's podcast. Hitman was brutal. That guy lives under a bridge and eats children, man. He's a world class troll. He's got fucking problems, man.

He is not a fan of Patrick Michael. We love, listen, we love Patrick Michael on this show. I've been, I've been, I've been my official stay. I showed Carl before I got here that I was showing him I recently played podcast. Yeah. That was all nine minute podcasts. I was like, I gotta find out what, she's like, I recently played podcasts. Yeah, it was all nine minute podcasts I was like I got to find out what I mean, it's fascinating, right?

Shameless is very excited about the new M&M and Conor Regretter winning and all the other white guys that are the new M&M review was amazing He only listened to a little bit of it. I hear two tracks, but all 20 are great This is too trash. I did a review podcast. It's two tracks, and it's gonna review podcasts. That's how quickly it gets podcasts out. Before you can even talk about the subject matter, it's already out. It's awesome.

It's like kills it. But the beginning half of this thing that we're gonna start listening to, if you took out all of the word podcast out of it, it sounds like Delvets interviewing James Holmes, the Dark Knight movie theater shooter. It's a fucking manifesto. I think you're right about that. Let's start off with the introduction of our friend Patrick Michael. Um, your host, Delvin Cox. In this week, I have a special guest on

the podcast with me. Somebody who hasn't been on it in a long while. Let them know who you are, brother. Some of the people call me Shamus and I did that for a long time, but uh my name is Patrick Michael Thanks for having me, man Very natural. That's not about Patrick Michael. He couldn't get his name out and then he giggle this guy is just so confident He's just so comfortable on his own skin. He's so good at what he does. Yeah, I love that about him And also I should point out our buddy, Jody B over a Poe Boyz podcast was the one who connected me to Delvin.

So I want to thank all of those people for making this happen. And for getting me this episode, I'm so excited to play this for you because not only does Patrick Michael put out a podcast, but he's obligated to. I feel an obligation to the listener. If I stop doing a show, there's seven to 10 people out there that could be severely affected by it. He's not joking. Okay. So he has seven to 10 listeners.

One of those ideas we just learned is eight now to have never made because I have multiple devices. So this guy has seven to ten listeners. He goes, I'm obligated to put on a show because I have seven to ten listeners and they would be so upset. What would WATP talk about if I didn't put this out? Right. They'd be so upset.

So you think about that mentality. It's like, okay, somebody downloaded your show. Why would you assume that this is so important to them? How do you even know they listen to it? Most podcasts that get downloaded, I don't even know if they get listened to, right? So he goes on to explain that, I don't know if I should play this clip or explain it.

I'll be playing the clip first. They could be severely affected by it. And I believe that whole hard, because how many times, if you listen to a podcast and heard somebody say that they get emails from fans or Audience members are just listeners that are like, hey man your show change my life your show brought me out of depression Your show is the reason that I'm still here that type of shit man So what he is saying is he has heard that other shows have a profound effect on people

Oh, and they're very important to them and the fact that he has people download his show means that his show must have a profound effect on people I think you're missing the connection there Patrick Michael. That's not he that works I thought he meant that he's emailed other shows and said that he didn't kill himself He probably has but how crazy is that to think that because I've heard other people tell hosts that their show is really important to them My show must be really important to the people who listen to it. No So nobody's told him that Just So this is funny because he says he feels obligated to put out a show because he has seven to ten listeners

I'm not making that up. That's what he's just saying. So I asked the question. This is the first question that they ask. And I wanted to know what's the end game for him? Like what's the long term vision? I always think about someone who starts a podcast. They probably have an idea of where they want to get to. I don't know, maybe it's an HBO show, you know, my dad wrote a portal. There's been a few that have pulled that off. So what, what is your goal? Like it's okay to have a lofty goal. What do you want to get to. I don't know, maybe it's an HBO show, you know, my dad wrote a portal. There's been a few that have pulled that off. So what, what is your goal? Like,

it's okay to have a lofty goal. What do you want to accomplish? All right. I think I've won the first questions. It's from who are these podcasts? They're actually really good questions for you. Okay. I agree. What's your laws of vision? What's your end game? Well, I've kind of already touched on that by saying that, you know, I just wanted to be, I wanted to be something for after I'm dead. I could care about anything. I don't care about anything else, but I want my voice, my opinions, my thoughts,

my funny to be here after I'm gone specifically for my children. I want them to have something to be like, Hey, that I can go listen to my dad speak whenever I'd so choose. Well, I take that that's what that's the only reason. The only reason why he's podcasting is for his legacy. He wants his adult children after he's gone to tune in to chew gum or the nine minute podcast and here at his dad had to say about a primeist concert as friend went to or a chicken sandwich or a lot of people are joined and above ground. Oh, he had a movie that he read the IMDB page of. I need to listen to my dad's podcast. What was the length of that movie? 138 minutes.

This is what he thinks is important. Shamest, you're lying. You wouldn't put out the show that you're putting out if it was all about your legacy and putting out something for your children. You would do, you would just make a VHS tape like they used to do in the 80s and talk about how much you're going to miss the person and say put this in after I die or something. Because your podcast is unlistedable today. It's gonna be even worse in 2068. Oh God. And whenever it is, it's really irrelevant.

Yeah, whenever you think this episode is gonna pull down your M.M.4A, like they can fucking play that shit on whatever device they're using and try to listen to your podcast. That's the worst possible answer. And it's a lie. He says, I feel obligated.

I have listeners. So why do you do this? What's the long term answer and it's a lie. He says, I feel obligated, I have listeners, so why do you do this? What's the law in term goal? For my kids. For my kids. So stupid. You're poor kids. All right, so another question that we asked is,

what does success look like? I think it's similar. But it's this thing, it's like, you're making this package, you're putting on all these episodes. Yeah, what are you trying to, is it money? thing. It's like, you're making this pocket, you're putting it on all these episodes. Yeah. What are you trying to account for? Is it money?

Is it recognition? Right. Right. And he asked me more questions. I think these are actually really good questions. He asked also, what does success look like for you? What do you consider success to be in terms of podcasts? And even the comedy thing that you do.

I don't know. I have no... I don't have any idea. That's amazing. Perfect answer. Andy, the first time I heard that, I had a stop in, I was laughing for so long,

I stopped him. I could stopped the buoy with that one right there. Like, what do you think is gonna happen? And what are you gonna decide that you're successful on this? Oh, I don't, I don't. Success.

Yes, what does that mean? Can you define success? What are you talking about? It's so awesome too, because these questions are like job interview questions. Yes, I know. And they're not a secret and they're not hard. And he has no idea how to fucking fold it.

We're doing a series of five years. Five years, fuck. Okay, we did hard. Let's just pause real quick though. Cause I gotta say I love Delvin's voice. I feel like he's being interviewed by Wesley Willis. Yeah You won a podcast legend you have 17 podcasts. You off right to the end. Rock of a Gary Rock of a Rochester

All right, such a complaints to Andy and who are these doc? Complaints complaints you fucking asshole All right We don't know what success looks like but he is in it for the money I know he said it was for his legacy, but now it's it's for the money and I mean I make money from doing podcast So the hate positive it doesn't matter because you're still gonna give me you know one cent for the for the download So fuck it. I'm not mad at you sweet. So for the download. So fuck it. I'm not mad at you.

Sweet. So when we download a show, Andy, and you and I both download his show, he's making a penny off of that download. So he's not mad. He's pretty excited about it. That's an amazing business model right there. A penny of download. My God. This is a fun part. He talks about intense, intensive sense he's wreaking in.

He talks about his analytics on YouTube. Now, if you have YouTube videos, you can go into the backend and look at the analytics and understand a lot about how people found the video, how much they watched, how many comments you got, things like that. And he starts off by saying, you know, I get all my views from this Reddit page.

You know, there's a Reddit page that talks all about me that it does was like, there is? Well, that's amazing You know, there's a Reddit page that talks all about me. That dumb is like, there is? Well, that's amazing. Yeah, it's called, who are these podcasts, Reddit page, which is where these videos are posted. So he starts out by saying that. And then he goes deeper into his analytics and reveals this information, which I thought was hysterical.

But the average listening time for my nine minute videos, they can range anywhere from nine minutes to 15 uh less than a minute why would you say that? why would you know? I think I have four views out of average of any video he puts out and the people who watch I'm just gonna I press play I realized it was complete bullshit and I stopped listening So this is some inception level shit right here, you know that what random podcasts that reviews me go listen to them Two weeks from now, and I promise you they're gonna talk about this episode this segment 100% I can guarantee it

Yet yeah, how could we not you right. Holy shit. That's so fucking weird. He doesn't listen to this though. Oh, oh, no, he definitely does not. Which he already. He's mentioned that many times that he does not listen to our show except for at the beginning of the show. Well, except for he knows a lot about the show, what he says. And I believe I played this at the very beginning. So a big shout out to who are these podcasts. Thanks for the, Jesus. I'm gonna end up being in their intro music. How would you know that you would end up there

if you'd ever listen to it? Thank you. That's what I was thinking too, because he says that's the very end of the show. Oh man, I'm gonna end up in the intro. Like, you mean the part where we play all the Christopher people talking about us? Yeah.

The part that you listen to a bunch of times because you're a subject matter. Thank you, Contradict, and yourself. Yeah. Fucking his with crew. Great. So when he asks, like, what are you trying to do, you know, the 9-minute podcast is his main vehicle, he explains.

And he talks about what he's doing with that show. And my thing has always just been, now, I just want to be random and weird. I want to be silly. I want to not hold back. I want to say ridiculous shit. Not ridiculous in the sense of people are going to get upset, but just dumb shit. My grandfather slept standing up.

It's dumb, but I like it. I like it. It's stupid, but it's funny to me. Could you imagine your grandfather sleeping standing up? What a weird thing. That's all I say for it. And then I just move on. Okay.

So we're saying random ridiculous bullshit that is funny to him. I thought this was for his kids to listen to 50 years from now to get a sense of who his father was. Yeah. Meanwhile, my grandfather's up standing up. Is that funny? No. Is it mildly amusing? Not quite. Yeah. But I say it on my podcast. Yeah. Okay. Why? Why would you do that? Random ridiculous is the opposite of structured and talented. Right. Anyone can do random ridiculous.

In fact, that's what toddlers do. That's how toddlers talk. Random ridiculous. And you know how you react to that? What happened, Billy? Oh, neat. I'm bored with this, Emily. Yes, I'm in it.

I'm not trying to pretend you know what they're talking about. Oh, you're crepe of sleep standing up. Oh, neat! I'm bored with this, have a little time in it. Try to pretend you know what they're talking about. Oh, you cripple sleep standing up. Oh, wow! Do mom tell you that? Speaking of your mom, I'm gonna go talk to her. Yeah. All right. So, one of the questions that I asked was

in the unlikely event, the podcast doesn't work out for him. And he doesn't become an amazingly famous stand-up comedian in the unlikely event What's the fallback back because I always feel like that's important right Andy sure? Your dreams aren't always gonna come true right it got to be realistic being an entertainer is a long shot career goal, maybe you should have a backup plan right even I Understood people get lucky and Right, even I understand people get lucky and luck is where preparation meets opportunity and I get it. This guy's prepared. He just needs his opportunity. I'm sure it'll have but in the unlikely event that it doesn't happen. What's he gonna do? I have another fascinating question.

And I think this is gonna be interesting for you to answer. What is the fallback playing in the unlikely event that just stand up career or podcast and doesn't pan out? Well, I always have music. I always have music. And I feel like I'm a virtuoso in that sense because I can pretty much play everything. I'm talking not just instrument

but genre as well. All right, every genre, every instrument. He's a virtuoso. And you know what he's a virtuoso And you know why he's a virtuoso and also humble not only can you play every instrument he can play every genre of music Why are you podcasting that that sounds amazing that should be your plan a so when Andy came over to my house just a little while ago I showed him the soundcloud page that Animal Crossly that's his mute rap name or music name I don't know yeah but I found a song on there I just want to play a clip from it because you just heard him say he's a virtuoso which typically like Steve Vi doesn't call

himself a virtuoso right like typically guys who are actually really talented at music. He's not even playing yet, how hard are you laughing? I just know where it's going. This is the song called Snakes in the Grass. And it's about how snakes could be in the grass. Like literally. We're really, yeah. Yes. Yes. Yes. You're seeing me. Yeah. Yeah. You're seeing me. Yeah.

You're seeing me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. The reason why I played that for you is because our friend, PJ Filium, who is sent in some of the greatest songs you've ever heard.

Okay. I have this podcast. I'll go along with you. Set me a note on Monday and said, I think I've peaked. And I listened to the song one time through and I wholeheartedly agree with him. Okay. And then it got better. He got Doug from who's right to guess that.

Oh, featuring Doug. Yes. So let me explain what this is. And to be honest with you, I know this is a one time and I missed most of the jokes I was laughing, so I had, so this is gonna be new to me too. I'm telling you, I know when I was listening to this at a sped up speed, slow it down.

This is the time to slow it down because what you're gonna hear right here is PJ is duetting with Shamus. He found the same drum track. Yeah. The generic drum track that Shamus uses. I'm this song, because the same drum track. Yeah. The generic drum track that Sheamus uses. On this song, because it's royalty free. Yeah.

Okay. So he was able to splice together him with Sheamus. And he got ducked from who's right. This is a fucking masterpiece. This is the future of WATP. Yeah. Like I was making fun of Kevin and Allison

because he doesn't do anything. Yeah. I just want to come out and show and be like, this is amazing. I can't just play one another, people. I haven't heard it yet. It's already my ringtone. Ha ha ha ha. Oh.

Animal. His name is Shema Samie's here to say, do something in the grass and those things or snails. and those things or snakes. He's never even heard a car. It's more likely he's watching his house with an aculod. Yeah, no. I'm sure now people thought where you went up. We know that Taj is a man. He's car rolls nightmare. He wants him dead, but at the same time he doesn't care. Talkin' like he's wavin' on me, bruh. We ain't never seen it, we ain't no me, bruh. He just drowned the words, no me, bruh. With the words, No me, bro, with the words. No me, bro.

I see you. Baby, and I do it too real. Being in this shit, trying to make you fuck with me. Yet I'm down a steady coming in, I need a mistake. I've been doing this shit. Why are you watching my back? Because I know I'm snakes in my face. Snakes in the brush.

I know they're snakes in my face. Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage And me Snakes in the garage When I sleep in the ass home and watch the studio Yeah, seein' me Yeah, hey, hey, hey, hey I'm bringin' the backseat of this car while he's on a swivel

Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage Snakes in the garage He's been here for a minute and 46 seconds curl hasn't fired back he's running before pie gets him the only place he might be safest Gary Indiana Something something something Harry limping I'm a monster, I'm a human, yeah I'm a human I come on this beat like a fucking idiot And I'm eating, boy, yeah you looking so hungry I've been doing this shit, it's why you're so hot My name is Hannibal, this is my beast, yeah

I do this forever, I'm like, thanks to you for being here I'm staying in the grass, oh yeah I'm staying in the ground Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah Yeah, you see some herding Herding

Herding Oh yeah, oh yeah Sticks in the ground Oh yeah, the snow is in the grass. Oh yeah, the snow is in the grass. The snow is in the grass. Looks rapeseed. Oh, we should. What day? So there is a video of this with subtitles because there's a lot of jokes that everyone

mess in there. Okay. Go to our sub-rata. You'll find it there. Doug just posted in the discord. Looking there. Yes. I got, I'm going to go out on a whim and say that.

I think that Shamist will actually like that remix. Carl gets dragged. Yeah. And there's additional fucking son-of-a-kind. That's true. It's good, it's better. That's true. He'll also get all the references to our show.

So let's just have every episode. So after our friend Delvin reads all of my questions, oh you know before I do that. Since we're playing songs, let's keep playing songs. Okay, I'm very excited about this. First off, Kroge sent in a song for us that I could have played in the beginning but I thought I'd put this all together

and package it up. This is Kroge's with an Andy Jingle. Oh God. Oh, my God. B-Z. But you came and you came without taking him. And you're right, yes, today. Oh, my God. B-Z.

All right, so that's me first of the gimme-gimmes with our friends from Come Downs. B-Z. Overlaid. But even more exciting, and probably took a little bit more work than that is our friend Doug White from Watchman Studios he put together a Shameless song with Shameless as the lead singer and I think his vocals are gonna sound a little bit better on this one

Then they did on snakes of the grass If you have your own podcast, I'm not going to be one of those people that's like, oh, I'm going to go leave a fucking one star review for their show because I'm one of those people that's seeking work that and channeling it right because you know what, in reality, you don't even hardly exist. You exist for a small second and then of course, you know, it drives me nuts for a few months but at the same time. The reason I say that is because I just try to figure out how I could possibly say something back or find your social media and we can start a conversation because that's really how I feel I

get shit going. If these people are real adults, what it seems like I have people that listen to my shows that are just like oh it's terrible why do you keep listening to that? What is unproductive? That's the literal definition of insanity, repeating the same action, hoping for a different result. When people are the critical of the content you make, or the things that you do, and I'm the type of person to talk back. It's like defend myself.

I was going to come in and talk, shit the man does a little girl. You're going to do that, leave her a review. You have the greatest heart in history. Even the greatest heart is today. We're criticized. Some of them were, they were sent letters of, and it's crazy, but that's the word of your aunt, you have to be willing to accept it when you are an artist. People are going to critique your things, they're going to

interpret it in a specific manner, that is not so, not your intentions. For me, and the people, doesn't end, of course, you know, I'd advise you not for a few months, but at the same time, what do you think I say that is because I just try to figure out how they would come at you in a better fashion they wouldn't just yell at you on a review and hope that someday you see it and the people that like it okay that's what makes my sense to make while your people that don't like specific content or content creators or artists or whatever. Why are those ones the ones that listen to your shit or look at your shit or observe your shit? Or review your shit? Is like the last people that should be having them opinion about your things or aren't creating anything? Or there's some reason up up to you in your standard. If you have your own podcast, I'm not gonna be one of those people. I'm like, oh, I'm gonna go leave a fucking one-star review for their show because you know what? In reality, you know, leave a heart. I just tried to figure out how I could possibly say something back or find your social media,

knowing you started a conversation and get up really hard feeling at checkout. If these people are real adults or real humans and they really want to help you get better, they would come at you in a better fashion. They wouldn't just yell at you on the review and hope that someday you see it, don't tell me that you don't like my show because I'm absurd. Yes, what? It's as bad as you think it's worse. Alright guys, I don't want to go too long simply because

Instead of leaving you just to be a dickhead and that's what I do. I'm one of those people that's eating revenge. I'm holding a grudge. I'm one of those people that's eating revenge. I'm holding a grudge. I'm one of those people that's eating revenge. I'm holding a grudge. I'm one of those people that's eating revenge.

I'm holding a grudge. I'm one of those people that's eating revenge. I'm holding a grudge. I'm one of those people that's eating revenge. I'm holding a gride. I'm one of those people at Teaking Revent. I'm holding a gride. I'm one of those people at Teaking Revent. I'm holding a gride. I'm one of those people at Teaking Revent. I'm holding a gride. I'm one of those people at Teaking Revent. I'm holding a gride. I'm one of those people at Teaking Revent. Doug did a phenomenal job on that. There were multiple keys in there. We had to figure out an auto tune. I will say that Shamus is never sung more in tune. Yeah. Doug is the guy that did all of those parody Yes. We played it last week. Right. If the listeners don't remember, it's just an endless supply. Well, Doug is also produced all of the fine isotope music that we play on the show,

Angelus and Hoffman, Slots. What else have we played on the show? I don't know. Who cares? Who cares? Alright. It pops to Doug. You possibly played on the show, I don't know. Who cares? Who cares? All right. So after we go through my questions that were like you said, interview style questions, they read podcast hitman's

questions. And the podcast has been asked Patrick Michael why he has a cock obsession, asked him where's Carly? And then why do you have somebody podcasts? And Patrick Michael's mildly in the way, but plays along with it until this question comes in and he is not happy. This guy's final question.

I don't know how to respond. I don't know what I read it anyway. Do we need to call CPS? That's what he asked. Oh man, now this guy's really just getting on my fucking nerves. Like, pull up, bro. Just pull up. I'll give you my address.

Shoot me a message. You're such a coward that you come through delvin' to say shit to me. Come see me, bro. I'm not that fucking guy. Okay, I'm telling you right now, I'm not the fucking one, dude. If you really want to talk that kind of shit, come see me. I'll give you the address. I have no problem with that.

Okay, I'll treat you like a daddy should have Okay, you want to talk about fucking fatherly shit talk about being a dad fuck you motherfucker 100% you can take that cock and shove it all the way up your ass to your mom feels it I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle.

I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don't know if I can jump the muffle. I don other. They're all saying the same thing. They call me Todd. They everybody calls me Todd, which I just don't understand where that joke is from. I don't get it.

Like I said, what did they call you? When does Todd go from? The only thing that I could make a connection with is Deadpool because in one of the scenes in the first Deadpool, he's sitting with his woman and they're talking about, she's pregnant or whatever, and they're talking about names for the kid. And he says Todd. And then he reverts and says, no, Todd's a bad name. So I'm thinking that that might be the connection that they made to try to use a funny, funny

one. Uh oh, retarded alert. Retarded alert class. Why did you make a connection to Deadpool? I don't know. It doesn't have a good sense. I mean, I would think that it's because Ned Flanders saw his name Todd and he's a fucking loser.

I'm a loser. That makes me so much sense. So Patrick Michael has this weird inflated sense of what he's doing, as you may know. And he goes out and talks about how popular his podcast is. Before they ever, and also I want to point out that I think he's confusing me, Doug from Who's Right and Jody B from Pope Boys.

I don't know that he knows us apart from each other. It's all one guy. Yeah, I think we're all one guy in his world. Before they ever looked at my show even one time, I was well into the 7000s. Now, think back to when we first met. When I first started the podcast group, some we really started talking.

I posted a picture on Chewd Gum where we were ranked in the top 50 podcasts. Bullshit! Okay, so this is wrong. And I just want to point this out. So you thought he was in the top 50 podcasts with chewed gum. And you and I could name 50 podcasts. There are 10,000 times more popular than his.

Easily off the top of our heads. Yeah. 50 podcasts, right? Right. There's no way he was in the top 50. What happens is you get on a platform. And they say you got to start your own podcast. We're going to help you promote it. We're going to get it out there.

We're going to syndicate it to all the things. And then the platform tells you, holy shit, you're doing amazing. You're in the top 50. And it's not different than there was information that came out about Ashley Madison. Do you remember Ashley Madison.com? It was the cheating site where you hook up. If you're married, you hook up with people. No, I got it. site where you hook up if you're married to hook up with people. No, I got it.

No, you know what I'm talking about. So it came out after they got hacked and the whole thing went away. It came out that what Ashley Madison was doing is they had about 217 guys for every one chick. So this was a problem. So they made all these fake accounts to make it seem like there's all these hot chicks out there

just can't wait to fuck. And they were like putting fake messages out to people and it's always in the first month You want to hook people in like hey set up for a six month trial and blah blah blah blah and so now you think that well This site really works well and this is what shabys has gone through too. I was a top 50 podcasts You weren't you got flees. You're not even close You're not even close if You're not even close. If there's 700,000 podcasts, you're easily somewhere between 668,000. You're like 50th from the bottom.

Right. All right, but I do love his shit talking because he really nails people. He nails me with this shit talking right here. Two good singers in this clip. You talk so much shit, you're giving people pink eye. All right, I'm not into it. We're grownups.

Why can't we act like? I'm calling you out right here. I'm not running from you. So if you're listening to Dolphin Cox experience, I hope you love me as much as you do. Because if that's the case, man, somebody's knees are gonna be sore. Ooh.

All right. It must have been on the second track of the new M&M. Yeah, you got that from somewhere. So I went ahead and sweetened this up a little bit and make his shit talking the way that he's hearing it come out in his head. This is what he's imagining when he says things like this. You talk so much shit, you're giving people pink eyes. Yeah, that's a good, that's a good smack-talker right there. Well done. He talks about how many

podcasts he has. I have 17 different podcasts you can listen to. Actually, I have more than that, but I don't want to promote them because I work with other people. That makes sense. I have 17 podcasts. What are they? I don't want to tell you.

Oh, I should thank you. There's 23 podcasts. Oh, well, what are those? I'm not telling you. The host of I'm asked me to not say. Yeah. I know how to be a star. So many lots to know that.

All right, So what else are I have? Oh, so we get respect for the questions that we asked him. The questions that you expected to be bad were actually pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. When did you thought we were going to talk shit? Well, actually pretty positive and gave you some interesting insight. They really want to find out a little bit more about you. So I thought that was pretty cool I Respect that I will give them that I respect that that they came like human beings Right, I feel like we've really turned the corner with this guy They respect that we treated him like a human being right now

Podcast hit man. That's so much. I hope to God. Dude hits me up. Hit me up, bro. Give me your address. You want to talk that kind of shit. I have no problem traveling. I'm gonna fucking, you want to say some shit about my kids, bro? Callin' CPS, bro. What kind of fucking person are you? Well, he listens to W-A-T-P.

So I would say probably a piece of shit. Would be the edge of that. Here's, I'm sorry, just real quick. Yeah. He said he say that his address is, he put his address out there? Did he? There, I think there was something in this interview where he's just like, my address is out there online.

He said that he would give out his address and his phone number and like he wants to fight anyone. Oh, I feel like Delvin was like, you did that, didn't you? Like, you should be good. Oh, okay. I want to say, at some point he put it out there on the air. Yeah, and I think we should all send him some pizzas Get some door dash for the guy that'd be nice It's at least we could he's giving us a lot of content. We should pay him back. This is the worst shit talking

I've ever heard but I'm telling you to right now homie you can come see me I'm not afraid of nobody, okay? That's my whole thing, is these motherfuckers talk shit to you like that? Not knowing what they got themselves into, because you don't know me. You don't know me. Okay? I collect heads, alright? And I have no problem putting another one on the shelf, I promise you.

Oh. It's like a fucking dork. That's how a dork should dox. That's not true. I'm collecting heads over here, y'all. 100. You want to step to this? I keep it 100, son.

Yeah. Fucking nerd. But the podcast hit man definitely crossed the line and he is not happy with that. It's annoying because that's the shit you focus on. You focus on the most negative thing. Instead of the fact that the one guy who kind of started this shit, asked the real questions.

They asked that word. Hey. Yeah. But you know, the way I look at it is, I could see here and be a funny guy and just be a joke-ster and shit. And that's no problem when motherfuckers are saying stuff that's not really relevant.

But this guy crossed the line. All right, so I feel like after this interview, Dolvin Cox and Patrick Michael, the WGP and Patrick Michael are friends now. All right, it's close as they're gonna get it. I think we're pretty good buddies now. And the real out of me is podcasting about. Oh no, for sure.

I guess if it isn't out of me. We can all agree with that. Last clip I want to play from this amazing interview. I encourage everyone to listen to it when it comes out. Again, the Delvin Cox experience.com. And this is, he asks him, hey, why don't you promote your nightman a podcast? And just listen to the confidence

that oozes out of Patrick Mike Goyne's promoting his own show. You don't want to be sitting there listening to a podcast for two hours that doesn't have any excitement Come listen for nine minutes and get all the excitement you can in a flash That's a weird way to end the thing Fucking saft your fingers you dork And I am up against it. I have a thing to go to. So we gotta fly through the rest of these clubs. I see you have a couple from our friend,

Southern John. Yeah, it's just, I listened to not the newest one with the one before that. I was like, oh, this one's only 46 minutes. I'll listen to that, not an hour and a half. And I just pulled some premium things. It's funny, he has a guy, his dishwasher broke, so he had a repairman come to his house

and the repairman refused to fix his dishwasher because it smelled like catshit and he didn't want to lay on his floor. But the first one is him saying that he's finally fixed the left right channel of his podcast and he's using audacity now. Oh, okay. Is that number two audacity? Correct.

All right. Yeah, I'll give you the exact verbage as an online. So I finally figured out how to get this thing down on audacity. That's where I'm recording. I know you're going to complain. It's in one side, but I'm going to try and make it two sides. We'll see if it works. Oh my god I cannot go so then the end of the episode he starts reading tweets from people and answering people's tweet questions Yeah, and some guys starts giving him shit and John decides that it's time to

shit and John decides that it's time to sick the calendars on this guy. Oh geez, okay. And he's gonna put up, you know, like a wanted poster of the dumbass of the day. Okay. And this is John figuring it out in real time. Okay. Let's hear that. So let me just grab a picture of Mateo here. I grabbed the picture. Let me screenshot it. All right, and now I'm gonna post it as dumbass of the day. I won't block him yet. I want him to see his ugly fucking mug. So here we go. Dumbass of the day.

Mateo. So here we go. Dumbass of the, that was a little screwed up there. Dumbass, uh, screw it up there. Time to type in while I'm recording here. Yeah, we could tell. These are two and three letter words. Dumbass of the dumbass, that doesn't make sense.

This is the last time I'll put this up with this idiot. And then, and then we'll be done with Mateo. Feel free to stalk this fucking prick. Please, I ask all my Melendars. Stalk this idiot. What an asshole. Because he's a fucking loser. All right, let me, all right, click this picture.

I misspelled the post in Matteo so you can see him So let's figure this out. The see what is thing is the guy's as ugliest sin. Oh there he is. Let's post Matteo Fucking idiot. All right, here we go There is the dumbass of the day Yep, there he is All right, here we go. There is the dumbass of the day. Yep, there he is. Yeah. Shit. Who's the dumbass of the day?

Just like you three and a half minutes to post a picture of the winner. I'm like an area that I could. It's amazing. Wow. There you go. You know, remember he used to have that Stinger in the beginning of his show.

Yeah, the news reel. Like, oh, that's gone. You can't figure out used to have that stinger in the beginning of his show. Yeah, the news reel. Like, oh, that's gone. He like, you can't figure out how to edit it on to the beginning of his show. Yeah. It's a spectacular, just crash and burn of a podcast. And I will say that radio gunk in the host of that show, we reviewed it on this show.

It's not great, but she's got to stop doing podcasts instead of any own giant. Only worsening her credibility. Right. It's terrible. When she was on the worst. When she was on the first time and he asked her to do it on a regular basis,

she said, no, she should have just walked away at that point. She's like, oh, I can't be your co-host. That would be embarrassing. Yeah. I don't want people to do it. All right. I gotta keep flying.

We're gonna do real quick. All right, you get the point. O.B. starts off his latest show. Yeah All right, you get the point oh be starts off his latest show and this fucking podcast is called Anthony makes me mad and sad So he fight he's never done this in the title before we're like I'm gonna talk about Anthony Kumia So he gets everybody talking oh shit. There's a new episode out where he talks about that and I just want to play What the actual Anthony talk is in this episode. Because somebody writes in and says, hey, if you saw Anthony on the street, you know, you guys both live in New York, and you just passed by him, like, how would you react to that?

Opie's response is, I don't want to talk about that right now. Right. And then he goes on, this is the only thing he says about Anthony on the show. The overwhelming majority of hate I get towards me and my family Absolutely comes from Anthony And that just really really makes me Really mad and really sad at the same time if that makes sense

So that's where you got the title for the episode and then there's no other talk about Anthony on the show And meanwhile he says all of the episode from, and then there's no other talk about Anthony on the show. And meanwhile, he says, all of the hate towards me and my family, do you read the YouTube comments? Have you ever read them? People write out the internet about you. Do you ever go on Twitter and actually read through these comments? They're not Anthony.

It's not Anthony. Although I was talking about it last week that they're two fake accounts or from each other. That's still going on. Now I've been dragged into it. So I'm very excited about this. I encourage everyone to check that out. Opie starts off his show, Waking Amateur Wood, with shout outs. What's going on, Dennis and Justin Collins. And who else? Rachel, what's going on?

Crumbum. God, all the regulars popping right in. Donald, what's going on? McKenry, Cruiser, what's up? What's up, Ken R? Hacks against Hacks, what's up? Aaron Lewis, what's up? Rich Dunn of it, what's up? Rick Bradley, my God. All the regulars.

You guys are like celebrities to me. You're already a merciless. This is what he's doing on his podcast now. Said this over and over again. I can't say it enough. Calling out people's Patreon contributions is exciting for one person. It's not exciting to listen to.

This is not even Patreon. I know. In the chat room on YouTube. You usually just hear it in Patreon, but that's the exact same thing. I know. All right, so he has a sponsor on his show. He talks about him three different times.

It's BluChu. Right. More BonerPill stuff. And I'm gonna tell you right now, I'm predicting that BluChu is done working with OP based on this right here. I was talking to my pals at BluChu. I said, Hey, man, how are we doing? And they said, Oh, tell you the truth, we're 75% happy. And I'm like, what does that mean? They said, well, we need to get to 100% happy. And then we'll

continue sponsoring the OP radio podcast. I said, Oh, okay. So what that means is I need a few of you guys Not many but a few to go to blue chew dot com and get your boner bill All right, that's going away. There's no way nobody says we're 75% happy What that means is we've committed to these next couple episodes after that. Yeah. Nobody listens to your show, Albi. We're not getting anyone from you. We're semi-rigid, but we're on our way to completely flaccid. Yeah. See you later. Yeah, how do you guys feel about me? Man, not quite turgid.

And I call this also bullshit, because Albi is asking for more money. You know, maybe buy a t-shirt or hat at opiradiod.com. I got bandwidth charges up the ass every month. You fuckers are downloading too many episodes so that doesn't make any sense Rick. He needs money because of these bandwidth charges. He has up the ass for people downloading and showing so much Andy. Alright, I'm just gonna throw this out there because my show is downloaded more than his is I pay $30 a month In order to have this Everywhere that it is that you can download and listen to the show, okay?

So open doesn't need you to buy his merchandise. Yeah to cover the cost of these crazy bandwidth fees, right? I already bought the t-shirt carl cheese. What else can I do? All right BAD WITH BEAST. Right, I already bought the T-shirt, Carl G's, what else can I do? Alright, one last thing I wanted to play, because somebody posted this on our subreddit, Met Sarah, the UFC holo-famer, was on the Jim and Sam show. Ah, yes. Did you watch this? I saw in the Reddit feed that he was talking shit. I just have a quick clip, it's a funny video, but this is just great.

So what's really amazing about Obie is, he's confidence. What the fuck does he get his confidence from What the fuck is he so cocky about Because Anthony's hysterical, I think you yeah, I love that. Why is he confident? What what happened in his life? The summer's gonna be was good at something it doesn't make any sense. He wrote on his co-tails to success all right Andy It's time for everybody's favorite part of the show. Do it! The teaser!

The teaser! We actually think it's the teaser! The teaser! The teaser! The teaser! The teaser! The teaser! All right, I am going to invite Doggan Kaya

if they want to come on the show. Feel free to. and they sent me over this teaser to play so let me see what the note says that came along with it it says the show is maps IRL stands for minor attracted persons in real life oh it's a pedophile show. Oh, holy shit. All right. Well, here's a clip from it. Uh, well, first off, peace.

Uh, I'm a boy lover who's a proponent of queer gender and youth liberation. Oh, no. Coming out was like probably better than most people's, because I'd known about my attraction for a really long time, but I didn't call myself a petophile until like four years ago when I joined the community. Because for a really long time, I was into boy-man relationships.

I loved reading about them. I wrote about it in classes, and I'm very glad that my teachers had a good relationship with me because I feel like if not, they probably would have called somebody on me. The only person in my family who knows, unfortunately, is my mom, because she's the most, I guess, progressive of my family.

And she'll make little jokes about it when she sees like a boy or something. She'll say something about it. So jealous. Okay, I'm making a terrible mistake here. So I've agreed to let Kaya and Doug take over the show again. We experimented back in the summer with this They did a great job. It was very happy with it

So we thought hey, it's the super blah. I don't want to work hard next weekend I just want to get drunk and watch football and lose bets. Let's let Kai and Doug take over the show. I should a fucking known They put a fucking pedophile podcast Probe on a failure a prope of failure podcast The guy was clearly a molested kid that it's down grows up to molest kids. Jesus Christ. This is depressing Well this this might be the last episode of more of these podcasts featuring Carl We finally figured it out. We will have one more podcast at least. And then after that, I don't know. So I want to thank you Andy for coming on the show.

The phenomenal job is always anything you want to plug. It's fun. Oh, sure. And I'll be putting on a two day workshop at the story studio. Come see me. So please, Jonathan, next week. It might be the episode where we find out what's it for all why do duck and kaya hate me so much sleep well every party Of morning radio

Great show. Good job everybody. Good job everyone. This dude is fucking corny. Fuck you. That's the world. Mop there me. Don't be chained for attention. That doesn't make any sense, Rick. What's up, what? You do.

I do. Who gets a shit and gets a pop? I do. I do. I do. I do. Who are these? I You know who are these podcasts. I don't know. I don't get it makes no sense Vic join us on the show, please Hello

My bottom bitch Rick Vic what are you wearing Andy? W-A-T-P T-shirt nothing else Vick, what are you wearing, Andy? W-A-T-P T-shirt. Nothing else. Oh, that's good. He wore his sexy headphones just for you this week. All right, Vick, good news. This is an official segment. We have a jingle, Jen from the Jingle's department

finally got off her fat ass. And recorded a new jiggle. Ain't no. We feel, we feel, we feel... With Vic. Vic! Is that too much? I told her a bitch. Yeah, she's not real thrilled with you.

That's fair. Fair enough. Alright, what do you got for us? You're gonna read some reviews of who are these podcasts and Andy and I have to guess How many stars they gave us to go along with said review? Yeah, the first one is titled motorbike crash Two years ago I was at a motorcycle accident where my body was thrown across the tarmac and my skin melted on the road Seconds before I was slammed into a telegraph bowl. That was more enjoyable than this podcast

before I was slammed into a telegraph bowl. That was more enjoyable than this podcast. All right, telegraph, telegraph bowl. Wow, here was that. I'm gonna go with five stars. I love that. Yeah, absolutely. It was from Australia as well. That's a good old, maybe they do a telegraph.

Telegraphs. Still always a thing. Yeah, awesome. I like that. So the next one's titled, which I could give no star. Awful and intelligent discussion. Me too. Do these guys slam 20 beers before they awfully trash talk other podcasts, which are ironically a thousand times better than their own and

listening to some of my favorite podcasters, which guests are on their shows is uns in what the fuck? Uninsufferable. is uns... in what the fuck? Un-in-sufferable. Pfft! Un-in-sufferable. So that means it's sufferable. Yeah. Hilariously bad show. Please stop trying to wing it off the back of insulting other podcasters. Bunch of cucks. That's all the hallmarks of a one-star.

It is. So, did that person say that we have guests hosts that they actually enjoy as podcasters? Is that what I heard? Yeah, that's what you heard. So this must be one of the fucking official podcasts, guys. One of Kai's friends over there. Okay, we'll go to our shows. It's like, oh these people are amazing. Or a dick guy.

No, dick message to fans, I actually like our fun. It's the official podcast, kids that can't take it. So they say the art word, who I like this? It's like words. Yeah, it's not gonna go as one star on that one. Yeah, it knows from the UK as well. From the UK, see, you're up. See, Kaya?

Fucking do it. This last one, absolute dog shit. Wait, hold on a second, Vic, I appreciate your flying because I gotta go, but you said the last one, you only have three reviews. No, listen, I have a twist at the end you asshole. Oh my bad we should we should probably plan this matter. All right. God she's gonna cup the balls in.

That user left. There. Um absolute dog shit. So Carl the main person hosting this show is a lethargic sleazy and uninformed douche nozzle that has absolutely no class. I mean, in one of his episodes, he seemed absolutely baffled that people actually go outside and hike instead of staying in all day. One of his frequent co-hosts, Kaya, is his foil.

A man of absolute class and pure testosterone. And I honestly wished he'd just take the whole show over. Fuck you, Carl. Hmm. This sounds like a vicar review. Was that vicar review, Vic? and I honestly wish he'd just take the whole show over. Fuck you Carl. That sounds like a Vick review. Was that, was that review Vick? Surprisingly not. Oh okay.

I gotta say five. You gonna say five stars? I'm gonna say that's like a three or four star review. It's actually a five. Oh okay. Hey. All right. Chan.

All right. So I actually pulled a couple of comments from Reddit as well. Because that's technically a review, Carl. It is. So yeah, Reddit's interesting. I don't make a lot of friends there lately. Yeah. I just know hate you. Yeah. It's just about the dragging is LinkedIn profile picture. That's been pretty funny. Come on, guys, Carl is human. Okay. This first one is Carl, have you ever considered being handsome? I have. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one.

This next one, and that was by the command, command, Commodore, fucking whatever. It doesn't matter. Uh, Carl looks like every guy at my office who asked, how's it going to the next guy, uh, to the next, what the fuck? Guy in the year. Oh, yeah. And that's David with a three.

I liked it. He has these memorized I wrote that one He fucker and all these Yeah, of course he did He probably has a couple Tattooed like right next to his dick So that way like when he Massed, he can like see it Visualize it a little bit

possible Um, and then this last one Is the only thing that's longer than the show Is the distance thing that's longer than the show is the distance between Carl's eyes. Well, I already thought that was funny, so I guess that's a good idea. I don't really get it. I remember that before. You stopped talking, so I laughed. I was like, oh, that's where somebody's supposed to laugh at that. I feel like Vick has found her calling. I like the segment. I like the segment, too.

Wow, and just like that, Andy and Vic are gone. Jen from the Jiggles apartment is here. It's like magic. It was magic, podcasting magic, and we're ready to listen to some voicemails. Yippee! If you stuck around this log and mind as well

listen to the voicemails, that's what I say. It's the segment you mind as well listen to, you're already mail. That's what I say. It's the segment. Yeah, mind as well. Listen to your already here That sage advice and it starts out with a friend friend russer Hey Carl. It's friend russer and I'm fucking dead Nico actually kept his promise. I was walking by an alley and you know I was expecting to get rate that uh... how to worse but

then you could just jump out of nowhere with no pants on and his baby dick jumping through his boxers and he just fucking slit my throat he didn't wait me which is a little disappointing but yeah just fucking dead now uh... i'll call you back so I didn't hear about that in the news. I didn't either. You'd think friend dresser being murdered would come up somewhere. USA Today, CNN. Oh, at least USA Today, they love that stuff. Fox News. Didn't see it.

Night and either. So I'm starting to think that maybe Nico just killed the Fred Dresher impersonator. You wish. Does that sound right? Well, Nico actually called in to verify this information. What's up, Carl? Sorry, a little bit of a cold. It's me, your bro, Nico. It was so much fun being up the last week and rogchester man i hope the police never find that body of that little girl for way you did her anyway man i'm sorry i couldn't call in last week i had a little bit of a cold and it just would have ruined the like calling

uh... i think you know i didn't think killing people would be so messy when i started uh... you know in think killing people would be so messy when i started uh... you know in the past two weeks but but man is it it's really a lot you know the kill people uh... like a lot of clean up i really don't care about the fact people die

uh... i'm shooting for killing the real fragile dresser not just the impersonators but i think time might just do that for me. It's true. Anyway, Carl, sorry I didn't call in last week. Just wanted to make sure. You all know that I'm perfectly fine. I'm still out there committing crimes. No one is safe because Nico is here.

Anyway, Carl. that's that's it what I think with the thought of that voice now I feel like you was searching his notes murder is messy fun hanging out the last week sorry sorry I didn't call last week yeah I already said that shit is for that twice. Oh, it's okay, Nika, you don't have to call every week. It's all right. But please, I hope he doesn't call every week.

Please kill all of the friend, dresser and personators. That would be fine by me. Oh, Kaya called into the show. Oh, that's weird. He doesn't even do that. From co-host to voice-mower. His career is going to the rock. I'm just going to say, He's like the ad titic.

Spiraling. Who are these podcasts? It's called Run by a guy called Carl. That's a spot on kayak. I wouldn't put that kayak freshen up against any of the other brushes that have come in over the voicemail. So if fake kaios to call in, please anytime. Oh, this guy had to listen to some opian YouTube for some reason. This week, suffered through 52 minutes of OP Live on YouTube, and my God won an absolute disaster. He gives more shoutouts than Riley Martin didn't just hate it. Oh, yeah, we documented that today. Embarrassing.

It's embarrassing. Fishing story about stingrays, shitty jokes about rich vases teeth, 45-minute mark, e.d.l.s out chicken pecata three times, which is just cringe-worthy. And really just shows throughout the whole podcast there's sound issues. The guy just is zero talent. Then he begs for people to subscribe to his podcast, just other disaster. Can't wait to listen Sunday night and see what clips you guys pick. Love the show.

That's a guy who's really suffering to be a fan of W ATP. We do not encourage that you actually listen to OP talk in a real time. It's not fun. It's as bad as you think it would be. It's not like he's taking one for the team either, I mean. Right, we don't need you to do that. No, you're doing it because you want to. Unless you're sending me clips, so I don't have to do it, because I did listen to that.

And it is as bad as advertised. OP has no sense of direction at this point. He just fires up his YouTube phone. He's got his recorder there and he just starts going, hey Billy hey, Teresa's in the chat. What's up Teresa? Seeing you before, hey, Bob's here. It's only marginally less direction than he had before though. Yeah, I guess. I wonder though if Carl were a weezy, be like, what are you doing? You fucking dummy stop doing that call out shit I have a feeling the car would be Correcting his behavior a little bit keeps him on a straight narrow used to used to

All right, I Swear to God it sounds like there's a catch right to get out of our podcast right now For sure, I don't think this microphone is gonna pick it up because the cat is not allowed on the podcast as we all know. All right, this is, I just the only note I have is that this guy has the voice of an angel. Who are these podcasts? W-A-T-P. Who are these podcasts? Carl, please fuck me.

Oh! All right, well me. Oh, all right. Well, it's like that. I kind of have no choice. The voice of an angel was your note. Yeah, I listened to these since I recorded them a couple of days ago or not recorded them, but download them. And yeah, it's funny how these are surprising to me too.

I don't remember any of the shit. I don't know why I grabbed these or what I grabbed if you like the old theme song You can hear it on our bonus episodes Well, wow is out of available to the people who support us on patreon for as low as five dollars a month the price Of what would be the equivalent of five dollars? Well, you know, they always say like for a couple coffee a day But this is way less than that. It would be five dollars a month. You could buy a pool noodle at five below For the price of a single pool noodle and I know you're buying a lot of pool noodles Right just take one of them out of the cart and now you can get a bonus episode on patreon brilliant

This is why Jennifer the chicken department pop sad and Runs clean up on w a t p I like to make a contribution it Perfect. Now again. All right, here's I think this is another impression, but again, I'm just looking at my doubts. Don't say shit for attention. It's not cute.

Don't say shit for attention. It's not cute. Yeah, that's pretty good. Head is good. You couldn't tell what show was. We had to get you. I couldn't tell the difference. Oh Jared from Subway call it. Hey girl. This is Jared from Subway. And this is how I talk. I just want to interrupt it on the Roth Show. And I just like to confirm that I'm a toxic individual. I don't have any friends and I actually just kind of friddle day. Your show is really the only thing that's just been helping me through these last

few years in my life. So, you know, thanks. Keep doing what you're doing. And, you know, okay. That's a lot too. Sure, dead. Guys, when you call into the show,

I understand you know what you want to say at first, but kind of map out what you're going to say to add into the conversation to. Yeah. Or just think through it for a second. I mean, you could just say call me back. Everybody else does. That's a good point.

And did we talk about Jared from Subway on the Roth Show? Am I drawing a blank on this? I don't remember that. I don't remember. I don't know why we would have, but we talk about a lot of things over the course of an episode. So it wasn't all just David Leroth.

I was talking to my brother yesterday. So my brother's a huge kiss fan. And he's a big Van Halen fan. And he said that he listened to our Roth episode to decide he's not gonna go see kiss a David Leroth based side that episode that we put out. Because now he knows David Leroth's personality? No, because of the clips that Kroge was playing

of Roth's. Oh, right, right. We're so terrible. The guy is just... I mean, I'm not against Graham's argument about that actually, because that was so bad. Oh, God! Ugh!

Ugh! See, for me me I love it All right because But you know I love a train wreck so I do love a train wreck myself I don't know why we're discouraging people from going to see diamond David Lee Roth just because we played the fat that he sucks at Performing why would that discourage you from going? Okay, last voice mail that I have here. Carl, hey, I know you have Vick on for that new

terrible segment that isn't funny at all. Hey, so I've been trying for like weeks now to get her to send me pictures of her feet, okay? Like, I just wanna see him, but you know, because want to jerk off to him And she won't send to me. I tried many many many things Anyway, so the reason I'm calling is because I'm starting to go fund me because I need to fly to Australia so I can start a fire Like he said he wanted. Yes, so if you'll just donate to that. That would be great. Okay. Call me back

I can't think of a more noble cause to start a go find me. It's so creepy. It's not good. We don't we need to have. I need to have a tear on the Patreon. That's the VIX feet tier. And a VIX could just be a team player on this one. Maybe we can share some of the profits together.

She's always a team player. That's what I think. But also I don't think anyone needs to explain. They're going to have just be a team player on this one. Maybe we can share some of the profits together. She's always a team player. That's what I think. But also I don't think anyone needs to explain they're gonna jack off onto the. I know you're going to. That's the best part. Alright. Well, thank you for the new jingle. It's nice to see the department is back to work. We the department is extended now. We got Doug White in the department. P.J. is coming at even crows got into in the department, P.J. I know. Even Kroge got into the mix this week. My team.

Your team is doing really good. I think it's the motivation that you give them. I know. Your leadership skills, the way you encourage participation. That's what I do. Oh my face on the cross. Hey! Who are there's not? Hey!

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