Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep273 - Guardians of Lore

Episode Date: August 22, 2021

This week we listen to video game nerds read stories about a video game. I may be a boomer, but when I was a kid video games were just games that you played on a video device. I'd think reading homework would make it less fun.  WATP co-creator Kevin joins us this week to discuss Destiny, Tom Myers, the Buffalo Bills, Patrick Michael, Opie, Stuttering John and Cardiff Electric.  Check out our newest sponsor: partners.nucalm.com/karl   Support us and get bonus episodes: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ http://watplive.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's show is brought to you by Newcom, the world's only patented technology could have proven to lower stress and improve sleep quality without drugs. Visit partners.newcom.com slash carl. That's partners.nucan.com slash K-A-R-L. This guy has huge balls. Absolutely huge balls. We have a night who say? Um, I mean like... Uh, okay.

I hope you'll join me this Saturday morning and every Saturday morning at 2. Two. My car comes over, I'll stuff him till he don't know what's what. Episode 2. 3. You know what I miss Venus. Are you a boner guy? Cuz.

Cuz a roo. Cuz a roo. Slapper Cuzz. Cuzz a row. Cuzz a row. Slapperoonie. It's show time. I guess all the best, except when they're not Compton think there's really just a handful that don't suck That's where we come in, hard-catching views like I'll blow up and then they're right there WHOHP Who are these partners?

WHOHP Who likes these partners? Not WHOHP Who likes these partners? That one's beyond me Who are his podcast? That one's beyond me. Who are these podcasts? WHOHTP. W-A-T-P!

W-A-T-P, everybody! Hello, Robert Nixon-Kazaroos. Welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts. The only show that's a bigger turn-off to women than a teleband takeover. I'm your host, Carl Hamburger, with me this week. A man best known for a subtle and nuanced, co-op or commander in Prussian. It's the original co-host, Kevin. What's happening, Kevin? How you doing?

I'm great. Welcome back to the show, buddy. It's been a while. Oh, thank you. Yeah, it has been a while. I'm here. I'm alive. Alive and Tucson. The rumors, the rumors are not true. Kevin's still with us. Yeah, yeah, he did not die from hamburger related accident. And he's still here. Please go to who are these dot com.

You can get our email address, voicemail number, link to our subreddit, link to the discord server, link to our merchandise, link to our YouTube channel, and that link to Patreon and Supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month. And of course, we are one week out from our very first live show in Chicago,

w-atplive.com. And I've been getting notes from people, I wanna clear up a couple of things here. Masks are not required, I know it says that, that's outdated, I don't know why they didn't take it off the site. I asked them to, but they didn't. And there will be seeding there. They warn you that you might not get a seed of a Jesus Christ, because you'd be more of a turn off to buy tickets for this thing. There will be plenty of seeding for everybody. And you don't have to wear a mask. It's going to be a lot of fun. And

we're going to have myself producer Chris Jen from the Jingle's department Croge and the Vinny and Dick Masterson all their to entertain you and both review girls Casey and Vic. Vic was a close call at the last minute but she's in so that's good. Mr. Vic also. Mr. Vic I believe will be there as well and he might be the next review girl. No, he was pretty good. So definitely if. So definitely, if you're in the area, or if you feel like driving a long ways, come check us out on August 28th in Lombard, Illinois, at 6 p.m.

Also, we encourage our listeners to give us a five-star review on Apple Podcasts and then shit all over. In the comments section, today, we'll be reviewing a podcast called Guardians of Lore. This is a suggestion that was set in by Caleb Kirschner. We have both listened separately. We have not discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it.

This is a show hosted by Alamist and Orchid. And this is a show that's about the video game destiny. It sure is. And Kevin, let me tell you what I tried to pull off this week. I tried to figure out what the fuck is destiny. That was my goal. So I start getting into it and I'm reading up on it and I'm watching videos. There's a 30 minute video on YouTube that explains the entire story arc so far.

And I'm like, all right, cool. I'll watch this and then I want to sound like such a fucking moron. What I'm talking about this podcast. I got 15 minutes in and it was the most confusing thing I've ever seen in my life. Like Scientology makes more sense than the story arc of Destiny and new Rick and Morty's makes more sense. Yes, right. I was totally lost. There's so many characters so much going on parallel universes. so much going on parallel universes all for a first person shooter game. I'm not a first person shooter guy I know a lot of people like those games I find them boring and they're all the same Like who cares what the setting is all my different plan. Oh, I'm in Vietnam. What whatever even that if you shoot up Yeah, so what you're describing is exactly what most people's take on

First person shooters would be or video games in that matter Like no one really gives a shit about the lore like I play video games. I don't give a shit about Story when you say no one gives a shit about the war I have to disagree with that because as I'm getting into this like people care about it There are books written. I guess the company that puts this out which is Activision, but there's some other company I guess that yeah,ungie. Yeah, it's Bungie. Bungie. Yeah. Bungie has like a staff of writers. I was looking at their job openings. There's a lot of them. Like they have people who are just in charge of like writing all these stories and shit. I mean,

obviously, someone asked to do it. But I didn't realize it for a video game. You also write books and you can buy books and you can read about it. It's like, okay, what plan am I on? I don't care. What's your guy doing? Shoot that. Well, here's the thing. Like, if you are playing a game, I'll use like, I don't know, fallout. I don't know if you ever heard a fallout. Of course. So if you're playing that game and like you're walking around and you fucking find like,

I don't know, whatever, a fucking book in a game or whatever. It'll have like story elements in it and someone is obviously writing those. Sure, but who the fuck is actually giving two shits about that stuff? Like I can care less, I just wanna kill things. You know, that's like the whole point of me playing is to let off steam, like not fucking read.

It's the opposite of a self-park video game where I don't wanna play any of the playing parts I just want to watch it like just just go to the funny joke parts and show me the story But yeah right for this kind of game There's a lot of things that like drag out and you got to like sit through the guy walking in and then you know There's this fucking ghost thing that gives him some information about what's going on Okay, it's fine. Give me a gun. Where's the gun?

Yeah. So here's the thing, like Bunch, so Bungie is the original company that created Halo. Yes. And which is like a hugely successful franchise. And then I'm pretty sure Microsoft bought it or bought out the licensee, or owned the license. I don't know, some bull shit happened happened and then Bungie was like,

well, fuck it, we're gonna go make our own game and then it was this destiny thing and that's why everyone was screaming their jeans over it when it came out and then it came out and it was like shitty when it first came out. That's what I remember, but I never really played it. Yeah. But I remember being like really shitty

and then it got slowly better and better as it went on. But this podcast in general is just weird because it's all about the story elements of the game, which is like, ah, I don't know. So let's talk about this. So I'm gonna give an example of what these people do. They read the books to you. They read the stories to you,

and I went back and listened to it up so they had shorter stories in it, so it was a little bit more digestible, but this is what it sounds like when they're reading it to you. But he lets out a burst of laughter. It crescendos in an uncharacteristically jovial manner before dissipating into a sigh. I suppose it looks that way, as of all I admit, this is the territory the consensus would seed for the time being. But the plan is to turn the area into a community learning annex, where the elixony and humanity can freely share ideas, culture, and language. So this is like going to the library when you're five except for there's a music pad.

But the library did better, the librarian did better voices, you know. That's what I want to say. The reason I picked this show and I was going through all the suggestions, I knew you're going to come out and I'm like there's got to be one where it's scripted and they're doing characters and so disappointing. It was a bad idea. The guy's reading is like, oh he just slightly changes his voice. I remember like second grade librarians, he was like, he, he, he, he, he, like, oh, he slightly changes his voice. I remember like second grade librarian.

She was like, he he he he. Like doing a fucking witch voice isn't shit. Yeah, I know. He really bring you into it. That's that was all big for. And then they get really excited about these stories after they read them. That's complicated. Ew.

I like this entry. I really like this entry a lot. There's so much here to like work through. Oh, yeah. So I love that we've been told for a long time that Mithrax was in a human fire team. And that was kind of like that's always what's this thing. And we finally get to meet them. Well, that's retarded. So I listened to the story.

Warlock and Hunter meet with Commander Zevola. They decided they're going to join his team. It wasn't anything exciting at all. She's like, wow, that's exciting. That's a really groundbreaking stuff. The names are, it sounds like you made those that's exciting. That's a really groundbreaking stuff. The names are, it sounds like you made those names up. I'm truly not there to say.

I know. So they're so sweet. Commander Hapoblapp and fucking them. Captain Placeholder was talking to, so people are picking up on the fact that this woman has some vocal fry. Oh, did you pick up on that? Sure does. Oh my god, I have a couple clips of that. Yeah.

It reminds me of zero hour. How so? Remember when, remember when zero hour first started and there was, you could have somebody sitting and constantly opening and closing their menu. So it never started the timer, the timer cheese. I want to hand this woman a glass of water so bad. Yeah, because clear throat. A lot of vocal fry is this thing where it descends into vocal fry and by the end of the sentence, they're like,

talking like a last. But this woman gets stuck in this vocal fry loop. Like it just sounds like her throat needs lubrication. Here's an example that I pulled. It was very neat. It was that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that.

I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that.

I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I clicked on it and I'm like, why is this is broken? It's taking me back to my own shed Then I realized this because they tweeted my own shed. So that was neat

But I mean we've pointed out local fry many times on the show. It's a no. Yeah It's not a good way to broadcast No, and of course then that leads me to well, I got to see what this person looks like. Oh, yeah me too You know because I'm I so I I find her Twitter. Yep and looks like. Oh yeah, me too. You know, because I'm like, so I find her Twitter. Yep.

And as I would have guessed, she has fucking purple hair, blue hair, whatever it's like. I just knew there was gonna be some weird hair color in here. Well, she probably needs attention. I'm guessing. Yeah. You know, the more I, because I listen to a couple episodes

and it seems like she doesn't even really like Playing the game. Oh, no, well, she hates raids. She talks about that. She's like you got me your raid last week. I hate raids She like she said she's hated shit like multiple times in the show, and it's like That's what I don't understand about games or gamers. Now it is. It's like. Oh, well, I had to grind for fucking eight hours to get my level up. It's like, what happened to like having fun playing the game? Yeah. Everything's like a job now. Like, you know, you're not going to get fucking, well, maybe you can. Now you could, I guess, get paid for it.

Nothing to have to read books and know all the lore and everything. The care to names, it's too much. I know, we're going to get, we're going to get called Boomers now. It's fine. I picked up on another crutch that Orkid has see if you can figure out what I'm talking about here in this clip Like I actually liked rating in D1 and I liked doing Leviathan and like I don't know what changed like since then That it like has made me hate them so much

which like it's really surprises me that I like dislike them so much, which like, it really surprises me that I dislike them so much that they make me so uncomfortable, I don't like doing them, like I actively avoid doing them. And so I've been trying to find like joy and little stuff again, and enjoy and little stuff again. And it's like standing on my front porch and like enjoying like the sky turning pink is like nice. You notice a certain word getting inserted in there quite a bit there, Kevin? I sure did.

So what I like to do is put together a little compilation. So I went in and I found all the likes. And by the way, the way I do this, if she's using the word like appropriately, I don't even put it in little compilation. So I went in and I found all the likes and by the way the way I do this, if she's using the word like appropriately, I don't even put it in the compilation. I only find the wrong likes to put in the compilation. I mostly do like that. And I thought well I could play her saying like a thousand times in a row and you know we go like oh wow that's a lot of likes. But I'm ready to up my game this week. I have put together what is I'm gonna call my shot the greatest like compilation to ever be put together. This

is the master of likes. Like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like able to hear that song again. Not every time I'm hearing that, not all I'm gonna think about is that compilation. You should have seen me this morning, my wife is in the room with me, and I'm trying to line up the lights, I'm head on the note, I'm like trying to tap out the beat, like a squeezin' a little bit this way. It took me way too long.

Isn't there a way to like trigger, I mean this is inside baseball, but is there another way to like trigger them with like a keyboard to like trigger? I mean, this is inside baseball, but isn't there a way to like trigger them with like a keyboard like trigger samples? You say and I should have done that on the fly Yeah, you could have done it right right to the song. Yeah point anyway That's a good point what I should have done is had an 88 key keyboard with all 88 different likes that she said Yeah, and just been ready to go and hit it on the fly as we were recording. Should've done it live. She's Louise.

She's Louise. She's Louise. She's Louise. She's Louise. Oh boy. Alright. What else you got out here, Kevin? I got some more vocal fry.

Okay. That's just, I would rather do that. I would rather do Halo 2 last run. It's just it's just me. Like I did a master nightfall with a couple of friends and that was fun. Oh I wish I had that master. I guess I'm a master. Master. I guess I'm more work to do. At the very beginning, they do their introductions. And so this is the host introducing themselves with a ton of enthusiasm.

I am your host for this episode, and my name is Orkid. And I am Elimist. Hello. Whoa, was that Vic? Didn't Vic sneak in there? I put together a little comparison here so we could see. Hello. Hello.

Hello. Hello. So what are the door? I gotta ask Vic if she plays Destiny. What's about little energy these people have to start off their show? This is the very beginning of the episode. As of the recording of this episode, which is the first of August, 2021. Anyway.

Hi. Yeah. Yeah. You guys, you should have miles of calls he'd be like a w a tp Hey w a tp and cousin ruse and whatever Yeah, so Kevin's here hey, come hey I'm a hair

So yeah, I brought, I brought enough. Some clips. Yeah. So they do this thing they talk, I guess there's something, I don't know, in the game called sweeper bot. I don't know what the fuck it is, but this is the beginning and this is just the worst like fake laughter. Okay. I've ever heard it's number the clip number five if you play that one first What's all see this sweeper bot?

Yeah, I am Lord's just to play sweeper bots just all over the concert room. Kevin, I just have one quick question for you on that one. What is going on here? What's going on in this? This is so stupid! What is going on in this clip? Yeah. I was in my car listening to this driving yesterday and

This sweeper bot think up coming up with this fucking fake laughter And I literally did an actual live like shut up shut up Yeah Gonna rock it, Jack Offsburg is gonna shock you and he's gonna make with the walk-a-walk It's Kevin's funny voices! It sounds like a gay porn out here! Thank you, Kevin, I wanted to hit that jiggle, it's been a while. I mean, you knew that's all I bring is weird voices. I do love it.

So, I know you have more on that, but I have a clip here where they lose their shit and laugh uncontrollably. Orkins explaining that she enjoys staring out a window at a tree. And no, this is not a Patrick Michael story, but she stares out this window at this tree. And I guess she studied trees and college or something like that. And this just cracks her up. I have a degree in trees. I like trees, okay. What? You're a tree scientist? I like trees, shut up. You do, you do tree search?

I sure do. Goddamn it. I'm not sure. What? What? Tree search, what? Mind blown. Blowed.

Blowed. I mean, my ball's got blown off. Yeah, how's her mind blown if she knew she was gonna say that? Yeah, it doesn't really make a lot of sense. It's like they're really bad at podcasting these two and they've been doing it for a while too. This is not a new show by any means that laughing while talking thing. Yeah, I know It is just I know I don't like it when they're laughing while they're talking or they're laughing while I'm putting my penis in them

So a lot of time they don't want women laughing. It's a terror. It sounds like it sounds like like when you let a little bit of air out of a balloon I know is that she's making. Yeah. It's not fun. Coming back to fucking hair color, when did older ladies, when did they become okay for like old ladies to color their hair weird colors? Have you noticed this trend? I have, and I've talked to my wife about it.

I'm like, you gotta stop dyeing your hair these weird colors. No. No. I did not say that. That was Mr. Hamburger. That's correct. No, I'm talking like, you know, like 70 year old women, like wearing blue fucking hair, like actually blue or purple or whatever.

What the fuck is going on? I'm not on Tinder, so I'm not seeing this. Is this like a Southwest thing? I don't see this around. Did you see this Chris? What? Do you see older people with like crazy hair color? Yeah, older women.

Okay, very good. See, Chris remembers, yeah, sad. That's right, Kevin, what is up with that? Yeah. Come on, I'm not the fucking only person to see this shit all right no way I think people are agreeing with you you got more in the sweeper bot yeah sweeper bot just more fucking ridiculous laughter number track number one it was Number one. It was perfect. I was like, wait, we have a character in universe who cleans. Oh my god, a sweet robot.

Kidnotical. It's the weeping of sea mud. Well considering, considering during the opening Red War mission, like sweet robot was sweeping up Kabal blood. Like, yeah. So, I know that I do this from time to time when I'm like, I know I do that. I'm trying not to. I'm trying to get better at it. I think you. It's super annoying because it's not authentic,

which makes it really, yeah. If you're tripping on ecstasy, you shouldn't be broadcasting. And if you're not, you shouldn't be talking like that. Right, good points. So towards the end of one of the shows, they do shout outs. This was really funny.

So number six is a shout out from, and what if fuck is it, Enamel missed? what's his name? Elements, okay, all right. Yeah, this is a miss in your life, Kevin. It's the first element Yeah, this is the first one As the only other one I know I'm just showing off because I spent all morning going Elements orchid Elements orchid orchid. I'm a mess, orchid. Orchid. I was just proud to say, my host name is doing drop.

I got in the mirror. And shout out to where Cuspin John. Hi, John. He's been helping me stay sane. And every time I talk with him, I actually feel good about how my life has turned out. So even with all the self doubt that I have and everything I

I start feeling really good about myself Did he call this person work husband John? Yeah, what the fuck that was the first thing He's got a work husband. Yeah, the word husband husband Oh, ever I want to reach his own, but this is what kills me is he's like whenever I talk to this guy I feel better about myself like it's just phrasing it in general Whatever Carl has me on he's like I we made the right decision not having good Kevin on before Kevin's my podcast And then they so he throws the shout out to or kid, okay, and this is what she says number seven. What about you shout outs? Shout out to you and for doing a dumb raid on Friday. I don't think it's not how it works.

I don't think you shout out. Shout out to my co-host sitting right here. All right, so who fucking moron? There's a little bit of over analysis going on with the stories that they're reading. So Orchid reads the story that is, I don't know if it can be classified as a story, but she's very excited about it. Doubling back so that the smaller ones at the back of the pack could have a go, let them enjoy themselves, croat thought.

Things will get worse before they get better. They deserve every scrap of joy they can find. That's really cute. I should point out, the one thing I did learn about Destiny is that the Traveler came and made Earth amazing, and then we set up shop on Jupiter and Mars, and people lived three times as long as they used to, and everyone was happy, and then all set up shop on Jupiter and Mars and people lived three times as long as they used to and everyone was happy and then all of that ends before the game even starts

and now you're in the dystopian future, the fucking sucks. So it's not a lot of fun going on and I guess that's called the darkness, the eat, whatever it is. So there's a little bit of overanalysis from this six paragraph story. A lot of it is, it's kind's a kind of the, the wider picture even of like the past year that we've had, like in real life as a, and also in game, um,

with the darkness kind of bearing down on us as guardians and the darkness bearing down on us in real life too. The darkness bearing down on me, how my my soul it's kind of like a metaphor for covered why she was going to darkness so I believe in a thing. What a darkness to her so but she does decide that the moral the story is to find joy it's I think this really the moral of the story is to just kind of find joy where you can Yeah, I can totally see that and just odd. I think that's it I enjoy where you can yeah, so the story that's based in a video game that you play for fun is about finding joy You don't say the thing that should be the fun thing that you do in your life that you're hobby

That's fun and the story is about having fun. I could go on with that. It's pretty profound, I guess. I guess I just like the days when like Italian stereotype plumbers used to just fucking eat mushrooms. It was an easy story. Yeah. It was able, it was easy to follow. There was no darkness. I never, I never understood Wario. Is he the third brother? I, I, I check the story. I checked out way before fucking Wario. I checked out at Super Mario 2.

That's what I checked out. Fair enough. You'll be shocked to learn that Orcid has a cat. And that, Oh. Orcid's cat has an account on discord my cat has to own discord account and just discord's people I don't control that account he confirmed that you fed him this morning so everything is alright you can't drop an end bomb You're cat drops and embossed. Don't keep it, did she feed you this morning?

Have you ever sponsored, like, gifts and meows? And I'm like, what is happening? When he's clearly, like, lucky I've eaten, like, on the Florida bitch, he's giving me my food. And I'm like, ah! I could have predicted that she owed a cat. She seems like a cat mom, right?

One that, like, refers to her cat, ask her daughter thinks that the cat's part of the family. I'm guessing. Yeah. Her Twitter, I think she's got pictures of her with her cat on her Twitter if you really want to check it out. But also, it says she's from Australia. Oh yeah.

Which I didn't, I did not pick up. Or at least there's an Australian flag in there. Maybe she just likes Australia. I don't know Maybe she was the one setting up fire couple of years ago. Yeah possible So apparently there's also a whole one part of the show that's just talking about news around destiny and destiny We can be played on consoles. They can also be played on PCs Using steam and they talk about how on steam, they're going to shut it down so you can't have fun names anymore in the game. And this makes Orkin upset. The big thing though is that in the winter,

they will be adding bungee name like the ability to change your bungee name. Yeah, but you can not be able to change it to big mommy milkers. So you're kind of losing like a big part of like the fun of playing on steam. What's the point of playing if you can't be big mommy milkers? You can't be, I want to be a Carl's Club foot. I can't. Oh, Carl's can't be that. I can't be that.

So there's something I can totally relate to from an element. Yeah, try and explain being too shot by goblins to your team who are all at like 1345. Oh my god. And you're just sitting there like, no, no, there was nothing big. It was just that goblin. Oh my god, dude, if I had a fucking die. He's going on! If I had a die, like all my friends are at 13.45.

And I got a team shot by God when it's brutal. It's so embarrassing. Loser. It's so, yeah. What the fuck? I mean, it's a Christian die. I don't mean for a runny nose on the regular. This is the last stuff I want to play on here.

Apparently, there's this cat that sits about a shelf in this one room within the video game and also within the lore. And the cat can be different colors. And this has caused a civil war within elements to tribe, or his clan, I should say. It's clan. Yes.

OK, within his clan, this has been a big problem. Then noticing something on a high shelf. Yeah, thank you for helping me because I did have the correct term on my notes, but I was trying to wig it like an answer. I feel fucking, I feel dirty just currently. You mean his clan, Carl? Are you talking about the guys clan? I mean, you never played it.

But you're talking about the tribe. What a moron. Then noticing something on a high shelf, he wonders, is that a cat? That cat has caused so much fighting and struggling in my clan. Why? Like it is almost caused a civil war in my clan because we're arguing about the because we argue about the color of the cat. So then what I like about Orkett here is that she calls him out for being a dork. You know it can be a different cat, right? Cats move and there are more than one cat in the tower, right?

and there are more than one cat in the tower, right? Except that it's literally talking about the cat that's on the top shelf of Zavala's office. Is it a live cat? Yes. You know, cats can move, right? You realize that like, there is always a cat there every time we spawn into the tower.

It's not like... know cats can move right? And then cats like high places more than one cat is allowed to be up there. But what I'm saying is that you guys are being stupid. I agree with you. I think that almost might be a dork. Diss. Yeah.

That was a nerd diss, right? He's like, my work husband and I had plenty, plenty of arguments about the cat and the color of it. These people are inseparable. This was a tough one this week. I thought it was gonna be more fun than this, but it was not fun. It was very brutal, yes.

You know, I had to turn it away because it was real low. I had to turn it way the fuck up in my car. And you ever like Ben Park next to say, like you're waiting at a light. And you can hear someone else's bullshit playing in my car. And you ever like Ben Park next to say, like you're waiting at a light, and you're gonna hear someone else's bullshit playing from their car. I was super embarrassed to have this shit

fucking play out of my car. Good. You should be coming. If you weren't embarrassed, I'd be worried about you. Yeah, this wasn't a role done with the windows and let girls fucking hear us. Yeah, if you had told me you were playing

this in your car and then you made friends, that would be a problem. Honey to that dude's wife's vocal fry Gained a work husband So that was guardians of Lord. Thanks a lot Caleb now it's time for So people send me in little clips from podcasts they listen to that are cringe worthy. And the first one comes from the guy who eagin' in our discord who found a clip that is from me actually that's quite shocking. This is a cringe of the week that came in from Matt Lewinsky again.

This guy kills it at podcast underscore hitman. A little forked shadowing there. Holy shit. Oh, shit. Oh, wow. People are going back through the old episodes and fighting some things. Okay, interesting.

Here's our real cringe of the week and this comes in from Adam Throughout once again. It's called yay podcast. And I don't even in from Adam throughout once again. It's called yay podcast And I don't even know what they're talking about. It doesn't matter. This is a podcast that is auto tuned Get off your phone He's a f**k an android bro George doesn't look like an android Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that

Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that

Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that

Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that Look at that auto-tuned song. Can co-worker-man nursing do you believe in life after a lot of for me right now? Do you believe in life after love? The sensitive side of co-worker-man there. Just in time for the holidays. If I can turn back time, if I could find the way.

What about just the two of us does co-worker-manor don't have What about just the two of us, does Cover Commander know that one? Just the two of us! I only know the chorus! Uh, Kevin, today's show is brought to you by Newcom. Newcom is the world's first and only patented technology, couldn't be proven to lower stress and improve sleep quality without drugs. Backed by 20 years of neuroscience. So I reached out to Dr. Steve,

I wanted him to look into this, because I wanted to get his take from, you know, he's a scientist, he's a medical professional. I wanted to get his medical opinion on it, and he sent me back this recording. Hey, it's your old pal, Dr. Steve. Carl, well, he forced me, but that was, what had done it anyway to look at the science behind Newcombe.

There's a nice study on office-based, rhinologic procedures. And what they did was they took 25 patients that underwent office procedures, and they used the Newcom column system. The preoperative anxiety was significantly higher than postoperative anxiety, according to patient reporting on a five point scale. And the finding was highly significant. Preoperative pain was not significantly different from interoperative and postoperative pain, so it really helped with the anxiety and not so much for the operative pain, which you wouldn't expect it to.

So their conclusion was that a variety of office-based, rhinological procedures are technically feasible and can be performed with adequate patient comfort without the use of oral drugs. So there is some science behind this, and I'm looking forward to more articles regarding Newcom. And Carl, you can release my spouse from captivity. Oh, come on. Or you know what, just keep it. It's okay. All right. Thanks, buddy. I'll see you. Unsubstantuated lies. Predictable, effective, affordable and easy to use technology

in just three simple steps. Newcom flips the switch from stress to rust. It's predictable, effective, affordable, and easy to use technology in just three simple steps. Newcom flips the switch from stress to rust. It's used by US military special forces and the FBI. It's used by foreign and professional sports teams, UFC fighters, the US tennis association and NASCAR. As Dr. Steve was just talking about using almost 2 million surgical procedures, what used to be a $6,000 medical device is now available to consumers at an affordable price less than a cup of coffee per day.

If you want to feel refreshed, feel calm, yet creative and perform life at your best, then give Newcom a try. On the day with Newcom, please go to partners.newcom.com slash K-A-R-L to check it out and learn more about Newcom. We appreciate them sponsoring the show and we appreciate all of you supporting our sponsors. Speaking of sponsors, I forgot to play this on last week's show, Cardiff Electric has an ad that he wants us to play for his show.

Hello. Are you tired of listening to a video podcast? Like the one you're hearing today? Are you tired of not having anything interesting to listen to on the internet? Are you tired of haters and trolls ruining everything? Well and we have a podcast for you, the Cardiff Electric Podcast. Listen to it today everywhere you listen to podcasts. So I was just on the Cardiff Electric Podcast. I believe he'd

dry he put it out today. And it was a longer interview than he normally does. I didn't want to stop talking to. It was such an interesting guy. So it was a lot of fun. Cool. Definitely worth checking out our buddy, Cardiff Electric. And we'll see what happens with the hashtag Chicago Mission. I guess there's negotiations going on behind the scenes. But he finally, Kevin, he finally told me what Chicago Mission is. Have you heard about this?

No, I didn't understand the cardiff electric thing. I thought that was fucking stuttering John at one point, right? At one point, we were willing to believe that maybe that was a socket count for Suddening job So there's been a lot of theories about who Cardiff Electric is. I don't know. Yeah, I honestly don't know what the deal is But he told me what the Chicago mission was because Since we announced the live show He's been posting videos of him like working out and stuff and getting ready for this. The S.J. Army is going to be there. So apparently, now this plan has two different things going

on. So it's well thought out. They're going to handcuff each other. There's going to be a bunch of people handcuff together in the front of the entrance. So you can't get into the entrance of it. And then they're gonna have other people eat the deep dish pizza in Chicago that night before and then take X-Laks and then have diarrhea all over the front entrance of the place. So you're gonna be gonna pass the guys in handcuffs. You gotta walk through the diarrhea

in order to get into the show. So that's the plan. So if you're coming to the show, where shitty sneakers, I guess. a moat of shits. A molecule bastard. They're always a step ahead of us. I know. I thought that was fun plan. Is the SJ Army tougher than the kiss army? Let's merchandise involved that for sure.

A lot. They're, uh, they're apparel isn't as as exciting is what I know that is not this is Jean Simmons from kiss I just wanted to let you know that SJ Army that's in fringy not my my copyright for kiss army did you see that Jean Simmons came out and called out D. L. R. go kick them off the tour he kicked them off the tour yeah did you see off the tour. Yeah. Did you see the camera? Really? Yeah, so this is so great.

So the Emily Roth was opening for guests last year back before the lockdown. So after the lockdown, they're going to restart the shows up again. And Gene Simmons took him off the tour and really called about saying like he's passed his prime. Called the fat dad Elvis. Yeah. He's like, he doesn't have anymore. And then Sammy Heygars, like, well, we're and really call it about saying like his past is prime. Call him the fat dad Elvis.

Yeah, he doesn't have anymore. And then Sammy Heygars like, well, we're making fun of the Emily Robb, I want it on this too. Yeah, like I saw it. It's so fucking funny. Yeah, I made it by myself. I care about everything.

Oh my, you know, our army is pissed. The DL Army. The DL Army. It's just one guy, just me, DL Army. The DL Army. It's just one guy, just me, DL Army. The weird thing is, didn't I thought wasn't a Gene Simmons who discovered Van Halen over the years? Yes, Gene Simmons makes it better. My Van Halen, I'm sure they would have someone would have figured it out anyway, because

they're amazing. But yeah, that's what's so funny about it. They have a relationship that goes back to like the early 70s. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you funded their demos, I think. Right. Yeah. I love it. It's by the way, Kevin, that was a spot on Gene Simmons.

He does. Oh, yeah. Well, you know what, the discard will disagree with you. Can you do Gene Simmons telling David E. Roth he doesn't have it anymore? Uh, Dave, I know we used to be really good friends and you bought a kiss coffin from me and everything, but your days are over. You're, you're washed up. No one's buying it anymore, all right?

But you know what people are buying? Tongue magazine My publication about tongues All right, so Kevin I asked you to listen to a show we haven't talked about in a little bit called Tom Myers versus the rest of the world, you know, it's no different than you know Police officer running to the scene of a crime or a firefighter running into a burning building. It's what I do. I'm here. Oh!

Did you check out any of the Tom Myers podcast by chance? I didn't get a chance to, unfortunately, but I am aware of how kind of horrible he is from listing to your show. Yeah, so his show was on a break. What he did was, he put out a new episode on July 2nd, and then he's put out a few new episodes since then, but they've all been best of and it's great too, because it's like there's things that got edited out of shows. They've never been on a show before.

They's putting into these episodes, which is mind-boggling, that there's something that he cuts out, like, well, then this isn't funny enough. Unreal. So I listened to the last episode that they did. that there's something that he cuts out like well then this isn't funny enough. That's unreal. So I listened to the last episode that they did. So this is around July 4th time frame. So there's going to be some references because I was going to see it's a political show. There's some references and things that are a little bit dated. But don't worry, he's tweeting about Afghanistan.

I have some of those jokes that I can read to you. Remind me. But let's just start off with talking about something near and dear to me, the Buffalo Bills. I mean, people are making good jokes. You know, my ears perk right up. Cole Beasley, a player for the Buffalo Bill, says he'd rather retire than get a COVID vaccine.

I've seen the Buffalo Bill's play, and I was under the impression that the entire organization retired when OJ Simpson left. Okay, so the reason why that joke isn't good is because I'm not sure if I'm right. organization retired when OJ Simpson left. Okay, so the reason why that joke isn't good is because the bills weren't good when OJ was on the team. They weren't good in the 70s. So people aren't like, Oh, OJ's gone. Fuck the bills then. I mean, Jim Kelly would have been a better punchline for that. That was when the bills were good.

Everyone knows that they're at the cerebral four times in a row. It's like a famous thing that this is the only team that's they're at the cerebral four times in a row. It's like a famous thing that this is the only team that's lost the championship game four years in a row. Yeah. Are they good now? They're amazing now. All right. They're playing right now.

I think I know. Yeah, they're. So then he has this guest on later in the show. And this guy wants to double back on the bills jokes, and he says this. Thank you, Tom. This is great. Yeah, you reminded me, Tom, when you

talked about the Buffalo bills, all of my relatives, or ancestors, or whatever, came from Buffalo. And even they're like, wait, we have a team? So I don't even think most people in Buffalo remember that there's been a team since OJ lab. I mean what's the thing with jokes is that they have to be based in reality. Yeah at least part. Yeah right and then you can you know take a little curve ball at the end or something but the fact this guy goes no one in Buffalo even knows they have a team that's what

they're famous for is the Bill's Mafia. The fans, I mean, the team's been terrible for decades. And the city, if you've been to Buffalo, this is the only thing they care about in the Buffalo Bill. It's the only thing they care about in Buffalo. And this guy's like, they don't even know they have a team. Like, that's the dumbest joke you could possibly have gotten. It's really bad.

Yeah, they're fucking fanatical. It's ridiculous. They're jumping through really bad. Yeah, they're fucking fanatical. It's ridiculous. They're fucking tables. Yeah Have you seen the internet? What are you talking about? Oh look out. I would love to I would love to Why don't you even have a board? Just like I just do all the drops. Thank you So Tom's favorite I just do all the drops. Thank you.

So Tom's favorite joke style is the punchline is Republicans are dumb. So let's all get into this mindset that there's two types of people in this country, Democrats who are super smart and superior in every way, and Republicans who are just dumb red knacks who can't get out of their own way. And then you'll understand

why this is so funny. The Biden administration will likely fall short of meeting its goal of getting 70% of those eligible for the COVID vaccine fully vaccinated. I say to solve that problem, send free fireworks to red necks, decrease population,

the percentage of those vaccinated goes way up. Simple solution. And he doesn't even know how to structure the joke. Never. Because he goes send fireworks to Rednecks and the guy goes, ha, you know, we get it. They'll blow themselves up. He's like, and that way, they'll have an accident because they're stupid. And then if there's fewer people in the world, those are the ones who are

vaccinated, and then the percentage goes up because the way that it works is there's a numerator and a denominator. And so denominator. If that changes, the fraction's different. It's like, yes, we got it. Tom, you had too much candy. Jesus. He's gonna sit good, didn't I? It's so, is he like trying to audition to be like a joke writer, like a monologue writer?

Oh no, no, he thinks that he's a joke writer. This is so funny. They're recording this on National joke date. July 1st is National joke date for some reason. And someone asks him because this show is formatted so poorly. It's him and a panel of people, and they don't know how to interact with each other. So someone asked him how he's doing and how his day has been.

And listen to how buried in comedy this guy is. This guy is just his whole day is just jokes. How was your day, Tom? Oh, I have been, I am immersing myself in comedy because it is international joke day and so rampantly comedy, that's the excellent comedy platform. They have graciously lent us use of one of their breakout rooms. We're not in our usual zoom rooms. I'm happy to be taking part in those festivities. I have taken part so far in a speed round. I got to do three separate two-minute sets in addition to doing a five-minute set in another hour and hosting a two-hour

block. So this podcast on it. Did you hear that? Oh, yeah. We got to talk about all the amazing things he did. So we put that in a pulse. Let's hear that again. In addition to doing a five-minute set in another hour and hosting a two-hour block. So this podcast honestly is just a bump in the road doing more comedy for international joke day. And my shift at the restaurant. I'm gonna close the night. I got so much going on. Check out my act when I'm closing. I immersed myself in comedy. It's like yeah you should have immersed yourself all the way under the water. Fuckin' drown on comedy, please.

I like that he's bragging about having two minute sets. Yeah, I get to go up there for 120 seconds. That's not a set. It's amazing. That's not a set. That's not even a set in a fucking open mic. Let's talk about the way that they transition from his monologue to talking to the panel.

It's always distracting to me, because there's no audience, but Tom insists on having an applause break that everyone just sits there awkwardly for. This just goes horribly wrong. And now all with the show, please draw me a welcoming Jeff Heisen, Abby Mello, and Michelle Wojekowski.

Yay! Great job. Jeff, Abby, Michelle, Happy International Joke Day. Whoo. And same to you. And same to you, Happy International Joke Day. That's your chance to tell a joke like, oh, this holiday's a joke, right?

Anything. What is it, your mom's birthday? Hmm. What are they going to do in a great bite again? Get it, it's a joke day. Oh. Oh. How do you celebrate this day by knocking on a door twice,

by crossing the road? See these are things they could have said. It would have been better than, how was your joke day? Oh, what be cushion would have done better? Right. A slide whistle would have been a better answer than what this person just said.

So he asks, how was your day, your joke day, and Jeff Heisen, this fucking guy, is out of his mind. How was your week then? How was your international joke day, especially? Well, I started crying today, so it hasn't been going great. I cried today because I saw a commercial for Charles Booker who is running against one of the worst people in the country, Ram Paul, for U.S. Senate in Kentucky. And his commercial was so emotional that I started weeping at the end.

So that was my part of my joke day, Tom. Oh my God, I thought that was gonna go somewhere. Yeah, was that a joke in there? No, this guy is legitimately crying at political commercials. What? Which makes me laugh for some reason. Well, it means he's on stage. If you think easily manipulated,

he's so easily manipulated at 60 seconds spot because I'm crying. Like maybe he shouldn't be voting in elections that. ASPCA, if I could are probably put something to a coma How you doing today? Did you know that they're starving kids in Africa? For 60 cents a day for a price of a gubacabi Jesus Christ How's my day going sir McGlock would you said that people are beating their dogs? What do you mean?

And Sarah McGlock would just said that people are beating their dogs. What do you mean? How's my day going? It's brutal. This fucking asshole is so stupid. Oh my god. Who doesn't like Rand Paul? This is the one guy who's given Fauci shit. We need Rand Paul. Rand Paul is like the scat to pace on Howard Stern. Like you need one person there to be like what the fuck did you just say? I don't want to agree with you with that stupid. What are you talking about? And then this other woman on the show is talking about how it's 130 and she's all excited,

it's the perfect time for her to be on the podcast because it's right before her nap. Oh, I nap, I nap all the time. It's one of the biggest, I'm not looking forward to having to like go back to work because a nap's have become a real regular part of my day. She doesn't sound Mexican, She's napping every day. This is not something I'll help you.

Don't, does. Kevin, it's okay. I can say that, Joe. I can't, I can't laugh. I can say that, Joe, because you're a vice-mexican. Yeah, I legally obligated not to laugh at that. Oh, boy. My friend, Dick, is also Mexican, so that's why I can get away with that. Oh, cool. OK.

It's funny because Tom Myers is constantly talking about like straight white man. On their shows, all they do is dog whistle, racist humor. And I'm like, oh, I'm not dog whistle. Yeah. He got one of those bases covered. Yeah, I'm shit. Is Tom OK with his guests or co-host not telling jokes No one's telling jokes. Yes, it's fine

He doesn't want to stage in him dude. I think this show is done. I think it's gone because they hadn't put out a show in over a month and It doesn't sound anyone's really enthusiastic to be there and I don't know if it's going well the public's not demanding it And I don't know if it's going well. The public's not demanding it. No one's upset that it hasn't put out a new episode in the wild. I haven't seen it trending on Twitter. Where is Tom Buyer? All right, here's, let's get back to some of his jokes in the monologue. These are really funny.

One of the panelists starts laughing at the setup of this one and it just shows you that people don't even understand comedy They're all they all say comedian if you go to their Instagram pages That's how they describe themselves, but they don't understand how comedy works in any way Reportedly Donald Trump wanted to send Americans to Guantanamo Bay to help them recover from COVID-19 in the early days of the pandemic Presumably he wanted to do that because he was planning the insurrection then and he didn't want'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that.

I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that.

I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that.

I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. was what out of jail. So we all ate Cosby jokes at that time, right? We all had fun Cosby jokes. You know, I listen to the creep off. Sure. Sure. I like the Norm MacDonald one. Pennsylvania is just declared rape is legal. So this is, this is the Bill Cosby joke that he comes up with. Bill Cosby was released from prison following his conviction being overturned by the Pennsylvania State Supreme Court. Opportunities to perform form might not be there anymore, but Anthony Cumia might let him have a show

on compound media provided Anthony Cumia can overlook Bill Cosby being black. He got fired from Sirius XM for tweeting racist stuff and its international joke day Reloading. Oh my god. He had to explain it. Yeah, I do explain that one. What the fuck? So all he wanted to do was say Anthony Cruz a racist that was the only point of that because why would it be like oh He can get a job at compound media. Why? It's a conservative Doesn't make any sense

I guess Bill tells people to pull their pants up There's no- There's no- See, that's a joke. Oh my God. So then, yeah, so then he goes, yeah, you know, Anthony Cumi, as long as he doesn't know he's a black guy. And the reason why I say that is because Anthony Cumi is known

for not liking black people. Okay, we get it. Okay, thanks for that. This next joke, I swear to God, I don't even understand how anyone could consider this funny in any way. It's just a sentence. A court in Baltimore, Maryland, my hometown,

ruled that aerial surveillance is unconstitutional. There go my plans to shoot my next round of local stand-up gigs using a camera attached to a drone. Oh. What? What? So he was planning on filming his next stand-up gig from a camera attached to a drone. Yeah, the cameras are on the drones. That's what they do.

They film. And would he be outside? Like, how would you- Maybe. I guess. And he's like, yeah, you can't film, you know, you're from the sky anymore. Well, that, that, that, that, that,

law is about drones. That's why that law exists. It's not because people are jumping into fucking helicopters and filming the neighborhood. It's a drone thing. And he goes, yeah, well, I guess I can't use a drone now. Like, well, right. That's, what do you mean?

Jesus. At least if he had a drone at one of his shows, there would be someone at one of his shows. Yeah, at least there'd be evidence that he's actually done stuff before. There'd be another entity in the room. Oh boy, okay. So Tom is talking about a video where Rudy Giuliani's son was shooting himself, talking about his father, and I guess he wasn't doing a great

job of centering himself in the camera shot, and it's a little bit odd the way that he's filming himself, okay? So the joke is that he has to hold it there because he has an erraction. He's trying to keep his bone out of the shop. Okay. And there it is. Who had the bet of like 10 minutes into the podcast that Tom would use the word erection? Ha ha ha ha. You guys have done the podcast more than me.

So I would have laid 50, 50 odds. I don't know. This is how uninteresting these people are. Who has the overrunner I went top to say boner? My rights. This is bad. It's it's really bad and I hope it's not going away. Hey Carl. Yeah, this is a bad. This is a bad podcast. He just bigger that out. It's pretty bad. It's pretty bad. I last last clip I have on this then we can move on to much better podcasts. So they're talking

about Keith Oberman, who's goofing on Rudy Giuliani. And the Jewish guy who's on as a guest who made that amazing Bill's joke earlier, he's got a comment on this that is ponderous to me. Can I just say that I'm going to admit I haven't seen Keith Oberman since he was on MSNBC and he's a lot older and now he actually looks like Anderson Cooper's straight uncle. You know what I mean? There's been no laughs! What do you mean I'm not? Did you think that was gonna get a laugh? Keith Oberman looks like Anderson Cooper's straight uncle. When they said Keith Oberman, I first went to Ken Ober. The fucking host of remote control on MTV. Yeah, that's what I think of every time I hear a fucking Keith Oberman.

Girl said yes, he said no. Now he's got his own game show. Why do I still remember that, Tog? I don't know. Holy shit. Great show. Oof. The great Colin Quinn CQ.

That was when I first introduced a CQ and Adam Sandler, I believe also. Yeah, because Adam Sandler, yeah. But more importantly, Colin Quinn. Obviously. And, and Kari were. She was quite the, uh, the looker in the day. Kevin, I don't remember that. I just remember the comedians that were on the show and I remember the theme song.

Carrie Moore. Does that make me gay? Yes. OK. What's up? Gay for laughter. Go. I got a heart on for a joke.

That's for sure. Speaking of jokes. Don't tell me you don't like my show. Don't tell me you don't like my show. Don't tell me. I don't like my show Don't tell me Don't tell me if you don't like my show Don't tell me if you don't like my show

Don't tell me Because that's absurd all right, so Patrick Michael I want to plow through this because he's putting out these episodes That's only about me and so it's I'm not even pulling those clips anymore because it's too much It's like the same shit over and over again but He's finally brought up a reference To one of our reoccurring characters on here and I was like, oh, this is interesting because and characters on here and I was like oh this is interesting because maybe some things are starting to align in the WATP universe. Now there are chances that there are some sort of like spy versus spy things happening where oh you

talked about you on his show you should talk about him on your show mention this what about Stuttering John blah blah fucking blah none of this shit matters to me dude wow is it possible that the two low-cows are aware of each other? I wanna hear his impression of Saturday J. Everyone's gotta set up a depression. Patrick Michael doesn't understand. You know, we've been talking about open invites and things and he's more like we're coming to Dick's show

and Anthony Kumia was on here saying that, yeah, you can come on my show anytime he wants. But Patrick thinks that going as someone else's show is a competition. He doesn't realize that the point of going on someone else's show is it benefits all parties involved. Right. You know, you add something to their show,

people find out about you, then they go check out your show, it's kind of like how this whole thing works. It's been going on forever. But he could just, he could legitimize himself in some way just by coming on these other shows or coming on here. Like I'm sure you would have him on here. I would.

If he said he wanted to. I would. We have to figure out how that's gonna work. But yeah, I think I would. I just wish that he would come on because it would make so much more sense as to what like he's doing or what he's the lack of what he's trying to do with his show,

just by embracing the fact that it's fucking horrible and just coming on, but oh well. Well, honestly, I think at this point, that might end the story arc, so I'm not ready for that to happen right away But this is him explaining that going on other people's shows all about a competition. I have never and still will never Try to benefit from being on somebody else's podcast Sure, I'll probably outshine them. I'll make them look like they don't know what they're doing fine

Sure, I'll probably outshine them. I'll make them look like they don't know what they're doing. Fine. My skills will shine so much brighter due to the fact that they still don't know what the fuck's going on. So this is just like a random, he's not talking about anyone specifically. Just, you know, if he did, Dick Masterson show or Anthony Cumia, he's gonna make them look bad

with how good he is a podcasting. Roger, Roger. Sure, why not. But I wasn't shocked to hear this. Is that what we're at now? Is that what it is? Everyone's just sharing the shittiest stuff with people. Fine. But what deems this to be shitty?

I don't know what a good podcast is. I'm simply just yammering on about whatever the fuck I decide. Correct. You do not know what a good podcast is. That is a clip right there. To where words had never been spoken. Oof. When he was talking to Brandon about how he thought his music was good,

even though it was obviously terrible. He's like, why don't I like it? It's like, oh, okay. So you don't know what good and bad is, then, all right. Well, that explains a lot. Some guy wrote something on Instagram and it leads Patty telling me I have nothing to do with his success.

He's like, you know, to one of my friends basically saying, you know, this guy doesn't know how much Carl helped him and if it wasn't for that podcast, what, you know, he wouldn't have any list or whatever. I don't really know what all he said but it essentially started with that and all I know, he wouldn't have any list or whatever, I don't really know what all he said, but it essentially started with that. And all I know is, eh, fuck off still. Right?

Helped me because you clipped my show and bleak, okay. Patch yourself on the fucking back. Pat yourself on the back because you didn't help create any of that content. You weren't sitting here editing for hour after hour, starting new shows, inviting guests on editing hour after hour. You weren't doing that. You simply took 45 seconds of a part of one of my shows and all of a sudden, yeah, helped me. Well, good. Like I said, pat yourself on the back, enjoy your circle jerk, but do realize You didn't And even if in your head you think you did go fuck yourself

He's really some good points. I wanted to clear right now. Anthony Kumi go fuck yourself dick match didn't go fuck yourself Kaya the official podcast go fuck yourself you guys did not help me at any single way You guys worth the one pulling clips on a Saturday morning when it's sunny outside. It doesn't, yeah. It's funny because he's, you know, he's saying like he would have been just as successful had you never single this fucking show out. Like, you're the reason why everyone is paying attention to him, obviously. Oh, yeah. No, he even says he doesn't want people finding him that way. He wants them

to find him organically. And I don't know. It's grown. It's certainly grown. And I have real fans, I think. I think I have a lot of people out there that actually really enjoy this shit. I mean the one guy that said that I you know I'm the man, you know you're the man That wasn't the crap that I was looking for. I'm a little fight it. I'm still pretty funny Yeah, there's one guy that's not the bad guy got real fans now. Thanks coach Oh shit, I forgot to talk about that reminds me these Oh, thanks, coach. Oh, shit, I forgot to talk about. That reminds me, these tweets from Tom Myers, which

is great because he puts them on his Instagram. And then people comment on them. So I just want to read a couple of these because it has to do with Afghanistan, which is a lot of fun. So here's a joke. Under the Taliban regime in Afghanistan, women may be stoned for going to school. In this country, women go off to school to get stone

to avoid being judged by their parents. And Steve Erksroy, telebong hit transplant. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Great. Here's another Jover top buyers. All the people looking to leave Afghanistan wouldn't be so desperate to get on those planes if they were spirit airlines flights. So William's eyes. You may have heard that the Taliban just took over Afghanistan, so this is pretty tightly. That's the top right. I can see a lot of comics wanting to do shows in Kabul. Thanks to the Taliban, they don't have to put any women on their shows. And Zack says, Tommy Boy is just not missing today.

Layed it up. He's just wishing with podcasting with these jokes that he's writing Jesus fire. Oh, he saw the word stone. He's like, oh, I got some Bung it transplant God damn, it's funny. Okay, so Patrick Michael this next clip hits all of the notes And I get excited when Patrick strings together all these different thoughts and feelings into one clip.

Who am I to you? That's where we're at now. I am so goddamn influential that just playing a minimal... portion of a podcast, even if it is a fifth... I'm sorry, it's got distracted by the discord existo. I hear the tale but it's been raping Christian children. Go! What a setup!

Go die what you got for that one! Alright, let's get back to patting Michael being in fun jobs. Sorry about that. That just playing a minimal... Portion of a podcast even if it is a 15 minute podcast, if you play one 60 second clip and I get 30 new followers or listeners or whatever, that's good. But to think it's just because of that, I'd have to be dumb. I'd have to be dumb to think that, oh, well, it's all because they're mentioning me.

That's why. But what it really is, it's the fact that you fucking idiots mention me so much, and I still do nothing. The ticking clock is more entertaining than I know. Yeah, right. I like the pauses better than the words. Yeah, more interesting. What was he trying to say?

He goes, I'd be stupid to think that everyone who listened to my show discovered me through a more popular show that plays me all the time, except for they do play me all the time, and I've done nothing to promote my show outside of that. Like, what did he just say? Oh, you can't trail it off at the end there, buddy. I love that he thinks he's influential now. That's hilarious. All right. So a guy Damien, let him know that Anthony Kumia wants him on the show.

One of the guys, Damien, he ended up leaving a comment where he said, Kumia, once you want his show, you should go on there and talk about it. Do it. Alright, something like this. And he wasn't the first one that had brought up Kumiya within my Instagram messages. I had also gotten a message saying,

hey, you know, I think Kumiya said something about you being on a show and I wasn't sure how this person heard that or if they were actually talking about Anthony Kumiya I had no idea but then I see the the comment from Damien on Patreon and that's when I finally realized oh apparently old Anthony Kumiya wants me to be a guest at some point or something this is this is not confirmed in any way He hasn't reached out his studio hasn't reached out nobody's reached out to me about it Iraq Why have we not reached out to Patrick Michael directly yet? What are we waiting for?

I mean you just heard him say that he's like I this is a rumor. I haven't gotten any communication myself about this. Makes me think that, oh, he would go on. Yeah, if he were invited. He doesn't his deposit like Stuttering John. But then he says this. I'm good. I wouldn't waste my time. OK.

I wouldn't waste a second. Naturally. On that show. Oh, jeez. I'm not a part of this group that you guys think I am. I'm not friends with these guys. I'm not secretly messaging them or saying things in a podcast to trigger them in any way and make them think that, ah, this is, this is certainly about me. And look, he, he talked about me right there. That's obviously

me. He said in the name. Okay. None of this shit is on a personal level where I know these people. I wasn't friends with Anthony either either I got invited to be on the show I took off work I flew to their place to go there right and now I'm a professional Podcast there this is how you do it You understand this I'm not even friends with them I'm not even friends with Carl You really is not connecting the dots in his life is he no I just want to he's like all I know I don't I don't text these guys. I don't talk to them

We're not good. Who it's like you should be in coach. He sounds like you should be texting them You know he sounds like Opie and he's never been to my house. He's never been my daughter like who cares You guys work together. What's the difference? What is the perfect scenario to get you on someone else's show? It doesn't exist right right. So I won't do it right Unless it's kill Tony and his internet doesn't work But he'll keep talking about it on his fucking show like it doesn't bother him, but he's gonna spend a bunch of time talking about it. Oh It doesn't bother him, but he's gonna spend a bunch of time talking about it. Oh He won't shut up about it This is him when he realized that I was on the chip show, but he only watched it for a minute

Like I said the closest I got to hearing anything from this one person was the Jim Norton fucking playing chip chippers and podcasts That's it and I barely watched a second. I just wanted to see if it was real He just wanted to see if it was real. He just wanted to see if I really was on the show. The chippet chippet home too much for him. Yeah, I think you're right. The character's too close. So apparently, the reason why he wouldn't go on the Anthony Kumia show is because it would be a waste of his time.

So it would be a waste of time time. So it would be a waste of time to have conversations with these old radio hosts. It's like, why would I want to talk to somebody who is popular in the 90s? I don't, I might as well get Joey Lawrence on. Whoa. You know what I mean? I might as well do that.

Yeah. Like I said, I'd get him on. I'm not going on his show, because I'm the host. Oh, Jesus. I'm the leader. All right, I'm in charge. This is what happens. I'm not fucking I don't understand what this I don't know guys Sorry, I should have cut this whole thing right here Because it bothers me really to the core you should have cut that out because you always say you don't care And now you're bothered to the core which I believe is probably more likely the scenario because you talk about it every single week for months now. Yeah.

It's actually dragging down my show. It'd be awesome. Cause it's just the same shit over and over again. Yeah, yeah, I don't, I mean, people fucking love ripping on this guy for sure. And he's certainly repible for sure. Well, the problem is is that people want to interject themselves into the story.

When they should just be watching it and enjoying it and letting it unfold, they're trying to actually change the trajectory of the Patrick Michael story as in this example. Well, back to being grouped in with these guys, as I said in the episode where I was talking about quitting podcasting, that is legitimately how I feel if this is who you guys think I'm supposed to be a part of.

These are the guys that should be my friends because people have made mention many times about, oh, that we are asshole's podcast needs a co-host. I mean, he's even reached out to me trying to get me on the show. Both mean, he's even reached out to me trying to get me on the show. Both guys from that show have reached out to me wanting me to do a project in any form. Guys, stop it with all these fucking touch points with Patrick Michael rooting the product here.

And I'll take responsibility. I was the one who said, hey, let's give him five stars that should have in the comments and see what happens. And it was fun for a second to watch him go out. I'm confused. What's going on? But I created a lot. You're fucking Frankenstein's monster or the Frankenstein's fucking whatever Dr. Frankenstein Jesus, I can't even fucking get it right. You're him I have created this fucking thing. There is an abnormal brain involved that is very true Copy that. But the problem here is that even on Patreon, no more DMs to this guy, we got to set all

contact with Patty because it's fucking up the whole thing. We're now we're now involved in the movie that we're trying to watch, you know. It's messing it all up. To be honest, I thought this was going to be the guy murdered somebody. I thought this was going to be the dude you're going to push to the edge. Not too late. I mean I didn't think it could happen. Yeah.

I honestly was funny about that is that Matt Lewinsky was concerned about his mental state back in April. He was something those people saying we should really get you know, some type of welfare check or something going because I'm worried about the way talking I think you might be losing it and it's like well he might be it's possible. Let's find out. So just so you know I know I said E. Rock let's reach out to him but he'll never do kumi as show. But back to the kumi a thing. I talked about it before in other episodes I wasn't even a fan of Patriso Neil let alone opian Anthony

What so to have any desire to have conversations with these people it's Never wouldn't waste my time. I wouldn't even have them on my show let alone guests on their show as I've said And that's not because they're not good at what they do or they couldn't help my show or it wouldn't it wouldn't I wouldn't get a boost in numbers simply because you know other gingers would see a red headed guy and be like oh he doesn't find whatever for whatever reason that they would come to my show because of being a guest on somebody else's show I'm not interested because essentially I prefer those that find what I do naturally find it on your your own, dude. That's impossible. No one's ever found his show naturally. How the hell did you find this show? The better question.

The only reason why anyone knows who Patrick Michael is is because of Jody B. Doug from Who's Right, who are these podcasts, the Dick Show and Anthony Cumian? Where the only people who talked about this guy, and the only reason why we know about this is because Jody B and Doug were involved in this network of podcasts that Patrick Michael was on. He got a huge fight with the other podcast and they kicked him off the network.

And so those guys shot me a note and said you should check out this guy's podcast. I wanted to chew gum. The rest is history, obviously, as we all know. This guy goes, I don't want if he will find me through other podcasts, I want them to just find me naturally. However, all of the titles of my podcasts are names of other things. And I have no SEL at all.

I will not promote myself. It's a dude, how is anyone gonna find you? Yeah, this is, I guess he doesn't realize like the opportunity that he has in front of him. Like, most podcasts go completely fucking under the radar. No one ever knows about them. Right. They fucking crash and burn.

How was that one? For a couple of years with me. You got, I mean, you got to like roll, you got to parlay it into something. Like people are paying attention. Now fucking, use that. Use that to make yourself better in some way or get involved in it somehow. I don't know. It's almost like he's dumb Almost it's almost there I'm starting to think that maybe he's just stupid. He doesn't get it

He's also very confused about any type of fan interaction that he gets He just assumes he's being goofed out at all times. But the interactions are great, man Um, I still am confused on the intentions from a lot of people, especially the ones that are on social media, like Instagram. I don't know if you are actually a fan of the podcast. No matter how you say it, if somebody simply says, I love this show, I'm like, this guy's a fucking liar. That's great fucking liar. That's great. I can't wait for Chicago next week. Hey, Carl, I love the show. What? What did you just fucking say to me? How did you get through the

shit mode? Can we please have this mad remove? He's goofy. I mean, I face. It's insane. All right, last clip I have on this. This is Patrick Michael is in our brain. And then his brain malfunctions. I don't know how you're finding the show and how you're getting yourself in this position to hear it, but you're hearing it. I'm in your brain. I'm in your brain right now. I can do whatever I want to play around.

I don't know. Fuck it. But just now I never actually gave a shit or wanted this to be anything, and I still don't. All right. So, Patrick and Michael never ceases to amaze. Let's not forget the motto of the show. As I've said, the motto of the show is go away. What?

A motto of a show is go away. I'm in your brain. I'm in your brain. Doing my thing in your brain. It's going to rain. And you know, Brian, you just reminded me of something. Some fan art, someone made they put in the fan art channel and discord. Remember when you was all obsessed with rain in Indiana? Someone made a photoshop of me and him. And it says rain, comma man.

And it's rain man. It's like rain man. It's very funny. Very well done. Kevin, right now it's time to... Babble, babble, babble. Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man,

oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, Bob. Opie was talking about the passing of Fes Wattley recently on his show. And I remember Fes very fondly. He was a fun character until he got really weird at the end. Yeah, it definitely got weird at the end. It got bizarre. Do you remember there was a Toyota commercial or something that Fez took offense to because they like talked about like Crazy people or something like you have to be crazy not to get this deal

I can't remember what the exact context was but Fez brought into the show and he's just like this is really offensive and Runny's like to who he's like well to crazy people That's supposed to be crazy first. What do you mean? He like fuzz just fucking lost out of that. I don't know what's going on with that guy. Yeah, yeah. It was it was great though. For a while, man, that Ron of Fes was just the fucking greatest thing ever. Yes. Agreed. Ron Bennington's the man. And so, you know, Opie's on there. Any sharing stories and stuff. I'm not gonna go find him for that. But there's a few things that I thought were interesting.

This is high pitch Opie, and he's talking about Fez because he never knew if what Fez was saying was a bit or not. And this is so meta. I could never figure out Ron and Fez. Do they like each other? Do they hate each other? Is this a bit? Is this a work?

Is this real? Is this a bit? Is this real? I can a bet? Is this real? I love that people are pointing out Opie used to goof on jocks on joktober who would talk with a radio voice Hey, what's happening? Call us and let us know what your favorite cat story is and now he's doing the Opie voice all the time He's not talking like a person. I Bitch Opie Oh, he's all the time he's not talking like a person. I Bet you'll be I bet you'll be Oh Shit, she'll be left I'm gonna get him out here

left. I could have gotten him out here and do that. A bit fud. This is just a flat out lie. So I can go up when Fezz came out of the closet. And anyway, the day that Fezzi went on the radio and announced that he was gay, I remember listening to the show with my wife, and we were cheering for Fezzi. Cheering. Bullshit. Your wife and you were cheering for Fezzy. Cheering. Bullshit. Your wife and you were cheering listening to the radio. Sockmarkock. I mean, I'm guessing the conversation went like this.

Well, yeah, no shit, you're gay. I mean, yeah, I mean, everybody, I mean, good for him for, you know, doing it on his own terms, whatever, but I mean, everyone kind of knew. He was the last one to know, apparently. Yeah. But the way opi tells the story Is if he was him him is like jumping up a dial with their arms of the air. Yes

Do you think he's she's ever in the same room as him ever like are they just live separately? I can't imagine you know about the Philly crew. That's his wife Philly crew? That's his wife. I'm gonna go see my Philly crew this weekend. Alright, so this is what Opie's up to these days. I don't know, I just babbled. I just babbled. Just some of my thoughts. And he does this again later in the show

when he's getting all mixed up. But, um... Oh, what was I gonna say there, shit? I got thrown off. King of Florida radio, blah, blah, blah, blah, eh, that don't matter, I'm just babbling, I'm just babbling. So that reminds me, anyone coming to the live show, brand new merchandise will be available. The dabble, babble, and flop t-shirt.

I'm very excited about, it's designed by GlenJ in Australia, shout out to Glen J, and it's a hilarious cartoon of centering John Opie and Patrick Michael, Dabble, Babble and Flop. Opie's talking about the time, Kevin, you must remember this. Remember when Faz dressed up as Hitler and came into the Opie and Anthony show?

Uh, yes, I do, yes. He would do this from time to time. He would shave his mustache. So he had like the little Hitler stash. And then he'd dress up in full, not to uniform and walk in. And of course, Anthony would lose his shit over this. He thought I was the funniest thing he's ever seen. This is all be trying to tell that story, but he can't say the word Hitler.

It's almost like, remember when Settling John thought he was being demonetized because he was talking about right wig stuff? You know, he's like, oh, you two's watching me and if I say January 6th, they kicked out of people out of the room, oh, seven. So this is, this is OP. Not able to say the word Hitler,

which you can say Hitler. This is not a swear word. You're not pro-hilla because he's alright. And Carl show you say it more often. Door pops open. Fuzzy comes in in a in a Nazi costume. I think he was smart enough to to have it just enough before it would be way over the top even though the whole thing was I don't know. Man, I got to look at the video again because I want to be accurate with this, but he came in as a look. He came in as a Nazi with the bus stash and started imitating Mr. H. and he wouldn't let it go and me and even Anthony were completely

horrified we're like he's going to get fired and he's screaming and yelling and he's saluting and he's got Mr. H down pretty pretty good Mr. H if you ever refer to Adolf Hitler's Mr. H in your life I mean I know we live in fucking woke times, but you can say Hitler. It was his last fucking name right mr. H's You was a crazy organization they had going out there What the fuck with this guy? Mr. H tonight. You okay? He looked like he's from the right that was after the second before the fourth He looks like he's from that right

Mr. H sounds like a substitute teacher Yeah, right Would like give the thumbs up to mr. H Fucking put them in ovens miss H Hey fucking put them in ovens miss the H Hey What what's wrong with OB to let's say Hitler You know in we are us Italians we had mr. M. That was mr. M was our bad guy in Yes, mr. M got his come-up into I believe yes, he did sure did

Mr. M got his come-up, it's I believe. Yes, he did. He sure did. Oh boy. Remember the Japanese, they got Mr. A dropped out of them. Remember that? Mr. S. All right. Mr. S. Choptas had a wife set off, too.

Mr. S. Well, hello, Nat. Twitter world, it's a Mr. S. Oh, no. Oh my god. So Richard O'Hida, the co-host of the Centering Judge Show now, is gonna be on Bill Marr and someone in the chat wrote, OJ is gonna be on Bill Marr and Stern John goes, what? Oh, they're gonna have OJ on Bill Marr and Richard goes, yeah, on some 24th. That's the day you're on, he goes, I'm OJ. So Hita starts with an O and a J. John is so fucking stupid. Why not play the alternate jingo as well? Come in from Doug from the Jingo's apartment. Thank you so much. Doug checks in the mail.

Stuttering John Melendez. He had an interesting beer on the balcony episode recently. John explains what a troll is because he is a troll, but he explains what they are. Oh, getting back to the fact, am I a troll? No. Here's the difference between me and a troll. A troll hides behind a phony name. They sit on their armchair on a shitty basement at the mom's house and our bullies. But they

know that nobody knows who they are. So they could be assholes and they have complete anonymity. You have a anonymity. You know, kind of like Joseph Kelly and Reddit and Maple Leaf fan on Twitter, you know, John Saka counts. He has a non-immunity. And my troll, I did live under a bridge once. I did ask you to solve these questions three. I don't ever want to feel like I did that day. So, when he pronounced non-immunity,

in that way, it gave me an idea. The anonymity. The anonymity. The anonymity. The jingles department is going. It's so stupid. Does, is someone coming to the live show dress as a cockroach? To John show, yes. Oh, alright. Someone's going to John stand up. Oh, right, right, his stand up show. That's right, right.

Yes. And hopefully, I don't know if they're going to walk in dresses a cockroach or what they're planning on doing. We're that so. Walk out with cockroaches. so fucking funny. Oh shit Oh, there's one right there This guy followed me all the way here. I said plus one so John is

drunk out of his mind and he is so bitter at this point. I have a series of clips here where he's talking about the reason why he's not a troll is because when he would go up to celebrities and ask them trolling questions, he wasn't disguising himself, people knew who he was. That's the big difference. He explains that other people have copied him. That's not what I did.

That's not what Sasha Barron Cohen did. And that's not what Triumphy himself told. The two ladders stole the whole thing from me. And both Bob Smigel and Sasha Barron Cohen don't even have the fucking Integrity and respect to you know You know give me like a kudos they don't and I'm not looking for

You're not He needs credit for asking celebrities ridiculous questions. Yeah, the man on the street was not fucking invented by Stuttering John Melendez. Yeah, and also what John Stick was was invented by Howard Stern if it was invented by anybody. But this is nothing new. This is not a new concept. And the fact he's comparing himself to comedians who come up with things to say in the conversation off the cuff because they're funny. Whereas John had jokes written for him by Fred and Jackie that he had to just read.

So they should at least at the very least say, you know what? We were Stuttering John's gig in the beginning. He's an Howard told me, John, you did it the best. He told me that at his house in South Hand, you were the best at it. Howard told me I was also the best to cup in the balls. He said, John, you were the best at sweeping up outside at my house. You were the best at using the swiffer and the living room when you need it too. He thinks that Sasha Baron Cohen and Robert Smigel should give him credit for their careers is what he just

said. He thinks he's more talented than these guys. And this, this comes off as just bad. This is just a bitter drunk. And this is the kind of thing you don't want to stream on the internet. But you get assholes like these fucking, you know, Olig, yeah, such a bar and call, fuck off. Did you make more money out of them, yeah? Cause I had Howard Stern payin' me pennies.

Does Bob Smigel, you know, you know, make my money with Tromba? You are me only with a fucking puppet. You fucking prick. Is anybody, is anybody watching this and taking his side of this? Like, oh, dude, first of all, the Olig character and everything else that Sasha Baron Conor has done is brilliant. Comparing yourself to him is something no comedian would do. No. What he's pulled off is unbelievable. Yes.

And the fact that Stuttering John thinks that he's even in the same fucking league as the sky, who's putting it, who's developing characters, nothing that Stuttering John did. It's not even close. He's making movies, developing characters. He had a TV show. What are you talking about, John? I don't have to explain this to you, but I have to explain this to you. That's some stupid. And Robert Smigel is one of the most brilliant comedy writers of our time. And he's going, this guy just had a puppet. He was just me with a puppet. No, no. He was in trouble. Let me tell you about this goddamn guy. All right

This fucking guy, all right, he tries to say that I ripped him off Oh, I ripped a triumph become a talk. He ripped me off No, no, I did not rip you off I don't have anything I love your triumph because I happen to know that you walk around your house talking to your dogs and giving you a try of voice all day life. I have three dogs when they all sound like try-where. I mean, even just for the fact that Triumph had a catchphrase makes him far and away

from here that anything John's ever done. Well, he's got good-bye-goo. Right. I forgot what he had don't count them out you know yeah when he had Sharon stone he was asking her questions he was like he's sure it's don't go get you know you'll be excited to know John show prop is on point so this is the guy who's bitter, that he didn't make as much money as Robert Smigel and Sasha Baron Cohen.

And so what is he doing with his life now that Howard Stern is in pain and peanuts and he can actually just do his own thing? This is a longer clip, but I'm gonna let it play and I wanna give props to Joe Namath, NYJ4 in the Daveler subreddit. He wrote, this will have you on the edge of your seat. Let's see, there's somebody else who wrote something.

Let's see. Let me just assume as we have this thing comes up. Uh. Oh wait, this is not the speech. This is some idiot from. Let's say I'm trying to find the speech itself so we can actually hear a little bit of it before we get out in here. These guys are fucking on.

Let's see. Let's see. Is he still alive? Let's see. When he's dead, is he alive in your room and dining room? This should be it. And we'll watch this for a little bit. Let's see. Grandpa boy. Oh, get up here No Cardiff you want to come out of the fitness man. You just heard that clip. Are you there card of electric?

Hello, hello If you want to come out of the fitness man, you just heard that clip. Are you there, Cardiff Electric? Hello. Hello. What's up, buddy? This is my new friend, Cardiff Electric, I just had a show. Hey. Thank you for having me on. Yeah, so you're the guy, you're the SJ Army guy.

You started the whole movement. I took it over. What do you like about this guy's show? Did you hear that two minutes of him going, ah, did you hear that? Well, obviously you took that out of context Okay, did he say guys this is my impression of the work show you could possibly put on and then do that Possibly possibly no, he didn't I watched it he didn't Maybe I should start clipping your show and finding all the embarrassing floods that you do. You should. I encourage it. And by the way,

card of electric, you're a far superior podcaster to stuttering, John, I enjoy your show. I don't even know why you like this guy. You're better than him. Did you listen to our interview that we did? I was there. I talked to you that in real time. That is true. Thank you. The current electric, do you do the movie phone? Are you movie phone voice? I am Dr. Remi-Lak. Why don't you tell me what you would like to see?

Is this Brian Johnson? This is my buddy, Kevin. Sounds like Brian Johnson. Well, I wasn't able to get this week, so we got Kevin. Yeah, they're just stuck with me, assholes. You also got the Cardiff Electric podcast. Well, that's true. One of the biggest podcasts in the world, so that's exciting.

Kurt, if what am I getting wrong, buddy, I'm going to give you a, I'm going to give you the four for a second. Go for it. Well, I think as we discussed yesterday, southern John has successfully conquered all the media and You're obviously jealous of him. So I thought we agreed that you weren't gonna do these segments anymore Yeah, I know you had me convinced so that some something happened. I woke up this morning I went oh, that's's right, that does suck.

I gotta keep talking about it, my bad. And please don't forget to play my ad. I already did play your ad. I fell asleep. You were taking a little C.S. set today? Yes, I had to get up early to finish editing the interview. Gotcha. I didn't do it.

It's a card if. I didn't hear, I don't know if there's a lot of out of the egg in your show. I never hear out of the egg going, I never hear any out of the going on Which is part of the chiron by the way. Thank you I'm the best I am fucking confused as shit All right, buddy, I'm gonna let you go. I mean you do bring it I love your energy, but I gotta get back to talking about these setterie John clips that I have if that's cool

your energy but I gotta get back to talking about these setterie giant clips that I have if that's cool. A bello. All right, you guys are ready to hear the story of John's trans son. Now, I don't talk about John's kids, but John's talking about his kids. So I'm going to talk about him talking about it. This is a T.R.I.D. drunk stupgeo.

Telling us about the time that his son explained that he's a man and a woman's body and you'll be shocked to know that John's the hero of the story. After I got the phone with my son right before we got off he said that as liberal as you are I couldn't imagine this conversation going any better. I said thanks my son. I love you. I always love you. Skull. My son told me you are the most progressive person I've ever met and I'm a trans person and I think you're the most progressive person I've ever met. Jesus Christ, John. How does he make that about him?

Jesus, because everything's about him, of course. What a fucking asshole. All right. He's talking about pig with pub and his friends over with the pig with pub. And he explains that he has very, very close friends. Now remember, this is the neighborhood bar that he frequents with other people drink during the day. I'm not shaming anyone for that,

but this is not where you make lifelong friends in my opinion. Because I do have a lot of very, very close and very good friends at the pub. And that's a fact, Jack. Okay, okay, so he's talking about these friends that he has that are really close and just you know, they're really connected with each other and he has this one story about playing Cornhole with one of his friends. Now before I play that, this isn't explaining what Cornhole is.

Kevin, you familiar with the game Cornhole? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm familiar with Cornhole. OK, John explains to us why it's called what it's called. And I think he's confused. We were talking about the game Cornhole. Now, if you want to know the reason why they call it Cornhole, it's because it's a hole. And the sacs that you throw used to be made out of

dried Corn Cornholesels hence the cornhole Cornholeio be with some butt head you got it That's cornhole. Mm-hmm. Wait a second. So the He did have it right and then he goes, you know, just like be was it by cornhole He like no that was about a cornhole. That's about an asshole He's TP for his bug hole. What are you talking about you get it, just like B.O.S.A.B. was a button. I was trying to get more listeners.

What's he talking about? Not to be confused with bunghole. I don't know why he decided to slip that in. You know, like Corn Holyo from B.O.S.A.B. No, that's the opposite of what you're trying to explain right now. So, wait a minute the bags were made that you say the bags were made out of no they had

they had corn kernels inside them oh all right i'm like what the fuck okay i got you yeah they weren't tortillas that you were chucking out the clear i look too close to Mexico everything is tortillas there it is uh although the corn tortilla far superior to the flour tortilla. No way dude. No fucking way.

My wife and a lot of her family, Mexican. Yeah. All flour tortilla. Really? Pro flour tortilla. I think I'm more Mexican than your wife and in laws. That's insane. Maybe.

That's the same thing. All right, I got to play in laws. That's insane. Maybe. That's the same thing. All right, I got to play this clip. It's long. We'll pause it. We'll get through it together. But this is this confrontation that he had with this guy, Eric, at the pub. So he's front of this guy, Eric, at the pub.

They play cornhole together. And Eric is a schoolteacher. He brings us this up multiple times. I love he's trying to dox him or what he's trying to do, but this is insane. I said it was fun playing cornhole when he goes, he had not bad for a re-target. Now, okay, me personally, I don't use that language. Sorry. In the old days? Yeah, it was an acceptable term. Just like Oriental was an acceptable term for adhesion. Guess what? The world changes. Thank you, Kinky. Yes, a teacher used that word. And as far as I'm concerned, so the teacher goes,

he goes, hey, that's a pretty good game of course. We get it up for a retired, which is funny. He says the job and John's all funded by it, because he can't say that anymore. That word should not be used, especially when you're saying it with a tone that is combative. So actually, you shouldn't use that term when you're talking about a slow person. Like, I don't know when do the retard or Gary the retard to characters of the Howard Stern show

that you worked ever 15 years. That's when it's offensive. If you're calling Senator. It's a accurate and be funny. But don't be. You're a good retard. Good retard. I'm about that. The proper way to address a

pretend would be Mr. Ah, right? Mr. Arr. This guy would be Mr. R. Right? Mr. R. This guy was a Mr. R. Mr. R. So I took it to the set. Oh, Todd. Didn't talk to the guy again for two with three weeks.

Now, there's a certain troublemaker at the pub. Who I just got. Yes, Mark B. Oriental could be used to reference rucks. Yes. Thanks Mark B You're a lot of the conversation. I appreciate that they could be called the they're not Asian rugs to Oriental What is don't so this guy is saying I didn't talk to the guy who called me a retard I got upset with them. I didn't talk to her two or three weeks weeks. Because he called you a word? How old are you, John? That's insane. Back to the club. But, this is Tweet at the pub.

Love is wife or a significant other. Love it at that. But this certain Tweet loves to like stir it up. Like he oh how dare you be offended by the term retard. I'm like what do you mean? First of all the dudes a schoolteacher shouldn't be using the term. Who cares what he does for a living? He's at the party college or retard and

John's all high and mighty but we John will call a Republican any fucking word he wants Like he doesn't give a fuck because all that person Leans politically different than me so I can use any term in the fucking dictionary to describe them But this guy can't call me a retard if he's a school teacher like what? Which are why I love the schoolteacher somehow a standard now. Like they fuck children. So you've seen schoolteachers lately? Yes, they're a pro.

Especially in LA. No one's learning shit now, Larry. Are you kidding me? Retard- I got a cousin who had epileptic fits that'll never reach the age mentally above five years old. Okay, that's how it runs in the family. Why the fuck does that have anything to do

with this guy calling you a retard? He goes, yeah, but there's a guy in my family who has a hard time. Okay, but you suck at Cornhole. That was the joke the guy was making. You're not good at a game, the children play. What the fuck is wrong with you? I pray for that kid every day.

His name is Matthew. I personally take offense to that term. take offense to that term. I don't call people that. I once gotten to an argument with a comedian friend of mine who said I was retarded when he was arguing politics with me. You are retarded with politics you are Your comedian friend was accurate with that description

Gran it Another gran it Who happened to be a school teacher now? Shondown school teacher, okay. I don't know why or where they think that it's okay to use that term. But anyway, this guy who likes to stir the shit. Well, John, you call people pricks. Yeah, okay. This is the thing. So, John has this like woke dictionary of the words you can use and can't use. And now he's going to explain to us that when he calls people names, it's appropriate. And when other people call him names, he's allowed to be upset with them for weeks on end

because he takes offense to it. Kevin, did you ever think when we were kids growing up, did you ever think this would be life as an adult listening to someone complain that someone else called them a retard? No, and I certainly, you know, as a fucking 13-year-old starting to watch the channel nine show for Stern. Yeah, never thought one day I'd be fucking talking about Stuttering John and he would be talking about how retard is a bad word to say Yes, this guy's lecturing us about what words we can use. The guy from the Howard Sterns Show.

Yeah, yeah. Holy shit. I'm like, yeah, I do. In fact, I have a lot of close friends. I wish he'd get off his high horse by falling. My friend passed it buckly and floored. Hey, come on, ya prick. Can I stay at your house?

That's not an argumentative term That's not a condescending term so So what I asked if I can crash and people's place on my cake prick I sleep at a couch Mr. P. I don't say break out. I don't get the argument here at all. I did, this is the most insane rant I've heard from Suddory John. He was offended that the guy said retarded or retarded or whatever he said. And John was so taken aback.

He had to go off on a 4 minutes on a show and he didn't talk to this guy for the longest time. John, it's not a big deal. Retarded people exist. The word retard means slow. It's not a derogatory term, unless they're calling you it, then it's funny. Actually, isn't it a music term? It is. It isn't retard. It's a musical term. Retarded endom is a slow down. Do you think one of the audience members might want to go back through all the studying jones interviews and find how many times he dropped he missed the all word? Yeah, he did.

No shit. And I hate this thing where it's like, but now we've learned that you can't say oriental and you can't say retard. It's like, dude, you don't write the fucking rules, all right, asshole? I don't care your rules are. You can have any rules you want want but that's not how this works All right Last clip I want to play so John's in Florida

He's doing these stand-up shows and I want to point out the Centering John who calls the Governor of Florida Ron death sentence and He's like oh my gosh covids going nuts over there. His buddy, Richard O'Hita says, you shouldn't even go to Florida. There's just so much COVID. And I'm looking at photos of him and he's hanging out with no mascot next to fans at the bar. And he doesn't seem that concerned. He pretends to be concerned about it on a show with his

super liberal guest that he has on, but he doesn't actually give a fucking real life. And this is the story about John being recognized at the bar by a fan. But yeah, it's been a fun, I go to this place called Slackers. It's a sports bar and I watch the Yankees. And you'll be amazed, I'm amazed, and I'm not bragging here or anything. But it's amazing.

This is a brand new clean fresh teas, it's called, clean fresh teas. Oh, he's talking about a shoot. I'm gonna show. And they're supposed to make you look slender and show you off your arms. So it's funny, because I get those ads on Instagram too. So they're obviously targeting us fat people,

because it's like, hey, we're this shirt, it'll hide your beer belly. He's like, oh yeah, I could use three of those. Just don't walk your arms. Just on your arms. He's such a loser. Grand, it won't show off.

You have any of parts you've put. And, Grand, by the way, they will take hospital scrubs. When I was watching this video, I thought maybe he was in the hospital. He just got out of the hospital. It's a terrible looking shirt. He bought three of them. He's also drinking of the hospital. It's a terrible looking shirt. He bought three of them He's also drinking Gatorade from the dollar store. Like generic Gatorade. He's like, I love Gordon the dollar store Gator drink

I wish it was just AIDS Look slender and show you off your arms. So what three of these? slender and show you off your arms. So, I thought three of these. What was I saying? So I've been hanging out there and it's amazing how many people recognize me. Like, I'm sitting next to this guy. He's like, hey, are you thinner and John? I go, yeah, I go, how do you know? He goes, come on, bro. I go, yeah, I go, how do you know he goes, come on bro? You're an icon. I go, hey, thanks So he bought me a So of course John makes him buy him a beer because that's what he does whenever someone recognizes them

And I love these like this one encounter. He's like everyone's recognizing me this guy comes up to me and says I'm an icon It's like Patrick Michael. It's guy said you're the man. I can believe it. It's great. So when I'm in Florida, I don't have the anonymity as other people who are in favor. So what happens to me is because I don't have anonymity. They come up to me and they say you're an icon. Oh fuck me. Oh. Alright, so I think that's everything that I have brought for today, Kevin. I feel like we've done it all. We've talked about Guardians of Bore. I psyched Joe earlier.

Yeah, that was so f- You always give me the best ones to review for sure. Sorry, buddy. It's my penance. Sorry. We looked at that yay podcast that auto tunes the thing for some reason. Dr. Steve talking about Newcom science. Cardiff Electric had an ad. He also joined the show for a moment. I'm on his show. Check it out. Tom Myers versus the rest of the world Patrick Michael drops another episode. That's all the same shit. He will not go on Anthony Kumia show nor would he have Anthony on his show. He doesn't want to talk to old guys. He used to be on the radio. OP is remembering Fez and Fez coming out of the closet. Stuttering John is a bitter drunk who is not even trying to hide it anymore, which is crazy.

So you know what that means? It's time for everybody to favorite part of the show. Next week we're going to be alive in Lombard Illinois. Please go to whtplive.com to get your tickets and here's the show that we'll be reviewing. We're back. Here we go again on our own. You did it. Like a drift or a was born to ride the bull. Guys, that's riding the bull is, it's talking about a four-former roommates. That's not a real.

That's not a reference to Toilets. That's a reference to disc golf on Wii Sports Resort. Do you remember this one? Ride the bull? Do you remember? Like a drift or going red Bull? This is a show called Jersey Shore Family Reunion. It's Jersey Shore fans.

A suggestion from our front AMD. As the podcast that we'll be reviewing at the live show, we will not be live on Discord next week. Just a quick announcement for the Discorders. If you want to hear us live, then you should come to Lombard, Illinois. We'll wait for you. Kevin, thank you so much for doing the show this week,

and it was great to talk to you again, buddy. Yeah, thanks, man. Thanks for having me on. Hope you guys have a great live show. And let me know when you want me to do the WATP wrap-up show with Croge. Oh, I love it. The new spin-off.

That would be fantastic. But you can't be with Croge, because it'll be better than my show. So let's think about someone else we can team you up with. Yeah, it would have to be somebody way really bad. You and Casey, the review girl. Yeah, I'm sure her and I would just get along Swimmingly. Oh, credit for electric's saying he'll do it. All right, Kevin. The after show.

Kevin, anything you want to plug my friend? No, nothing at all. No, no, Twitter handle or anything you want to talk about. Not at all. Okay. Well, please join us again next week. We're going to be live and it might be the episode we find out once and for all. Who are these podcasts? Sleep well, every pony. Party in the muskets of morning radio. Get out and show these old right now. Okay. Great show. Good job, everybody. Great job, everyone. Fuck you! There were no laughs! I'm not! Well, that's retarded.

And that's the way! You know, who are these? Podcasts. I don't know. I don't get it makes no sense From the who are these podcasts subreddit Gamarin AZ puts up a w a tp live show prediction thread Will it suck will there be technical failures? Will Carl get too drunk? Yes! Quips are Lucas. Yes, times three.

The only thing that will save it is Casey flashing or the post-show Caitlin Hadley gangthing. Please suit up. Be responsible. That swing has been a lot of places. Dead Eric predicts. I suspect the crowd will derail and ruin whatever

format and script Carl sticks to, so there will be a good episode hidden by a bunch of retards who are pissed drunk. Also, Vinnie will sit at his merch table and not sell any creep-off posters. Deeply unprincipled for Seas, Patrick, Trey, and Dick knows perform a drive-by, accidentally mowing down the entire SJ Army protesting outside. Meanwhile, the live show descends into chaos when Vinny discovers there isn't a buffet. Scary animator rights. I suspect the audio from the live show is going to be horrible and borderline unlistenable, and Carl is going to make the biggest mistake anyone can ever make at a live event.

Audience question... anyone can ever make at a live event. Audience questions. Crographan 1, Kevin Smith used to pull off a good live podcast complete with interaction with the audience. Old Clubfoot is experienced with working in audience. I'm betting he'll put on a very good show for all attending. Hestia is the best he has deaths. My prediction is, Carl will make that a week's episode and it will be

unlistenable, as live shows always sound unlistenable. Why Reddit is piss? Not sure. There are microphones that won't pick up all of the noise of the crowd, and I'm sure someone like Carl who plays live shows with his band has experience with vocal a fuck. He plays in an instrumental band. Outside command pictures this. At least three people whip it out, and Gaviston U-Basterd plays us out with. Carl whip out his guitar and try to make another music special.

And then he'll get stoned to death by an angry mom. And we're back, everybody. Kevin, you still with me? I am. Yes, sweet. We're gonna do some voicemails. No review girls today. Oh, okay. Well, they're both gearing up for the live show. They'll both be on the live show next week. So they got a they got a gear up for that. I want to give a shout out to Thomas. This was kind of funny. Thomas, so Saturday night after we did the show, I'm watching some TV on the couch. I get a phone call from Chrissy Mayer, pick up the phone. Chrissy is like,

hey, there's a fan here who wants to talk to you, hands the phone over. This guy, Thomas, was at her show in New Orleans, and I guess was, you know, talking about how he discovered her through WTPS, so she called me and had me talk to Thomas hey Thomas thanks for supporting friends of the show I do appreciate that he said that Chrissy show was great and of course he does she was standing right there what else is he gonna say you know you wouldn't be like well started good so all right let's get into these boys smells So, all right, let's get into these boys' mouths. Yo, so I just finished listening to that crazy bitch talk about her fake pregnancy death. And all the points you made were solid, but the real male in the coffin, I think it was kind of a blink or you'll miss it moment, is right before she's setting it up and scripting it in her mind.

And she's like, I think this is right, et cetera. She actually said, oh God, I hope my mom doesn't listen to this. I would think her mom would be like familiar with the story, having been there when she learned her daughter was pregnant and then not pregnant, but it's hard to say. So yeah, that's just for what's worth. It turned me into a fucking psycho at the show. Bye. Yeah, referring to Jenny Garth's story

on the 902 and OMG show that we did. And I did pick up on that. I hope my mom's not listening. That tells a story that involves her and her mom. Yeah, that's definitely a made up story, Jenny. Not good. All right, this is an interesting question. Hey, Carl, if we're placing bets on who the next podcast hitman is, I'm gonna guess Chad Dumak, you know, because like any time anyone wrongson slightly, he's like, oh man, they're the worst person ever, I fucking hate them, I hate them so much, they fucking destroyed my life, I'm gonna fucking kick their ass and they're gonna fucking die and like, yeah, I mean, it's probably gonna be podcast hitman.

Or maybe it's producer Chris, you knowman or maybe it's producer Chris you know like maybe he's plotting something right now Carl watch your back should i put a pull up on twitter to figure out or is this trivial trivializing this too much i don't know want to be careful with the next murder is gonna be yeah i want to be all the shit that reminds me someone that you know cavern you know you know uh Lance Mitchell and his sister Dawn Mitchell? Yeah I do actually. So I graduated with

Lance, Dawn was probably two years of how to you. Um they were arrested for murdering their stepfather yesterday. Oh and it is a doozy of a story. I'm going to talk about it on the creep off. It is insane. This is a guy I played soccer with, I went to high school with, and it's really interesting because when Mike Bude was on the show, he goes, Carly, you don't even realize, people you come in contact with, people you think you know, and then they try to be merged. I'm like, no, they don't. Shut the fuck up.

This is just random. And then fucking three weeks in a row, row like what the fuck is going on here? Holy shit. Yeah, I remember Lance a little bit. I remember that kid. Yeah, he was a fuck This is what I remember about Lance, which is kind of funny When I remember it so I played soccer with him and his dad was one of those like dads Really involved and his younger brother would play on our team too Ryan and his dad would be on the sidelines screaming the entire game. You're playing like a girl Lance. Yeah.

He when I wrestled I wrestled one year and he was a wrestler and his dad is at the wrestling music to him was like that. Yeah. What are you a fag? Hey, let's put your purse down and play soccer. It's like that. Yeah, what are you a fag? Hey, let's put your purse down to play soccer. It's like that. Like for real, like that kind of shit. I'm like, oh, this is parenting what a one. No, that's going to turn out. Now this isn't the guy who was killed. The stepdad was killed. This was the real man. Man, the stepdad must have been a real piece

of fucking work. Could you imagine? Anyway, so yeah, Lance Mitchell was his name. And we'll talk about that. On the CreeBug, it was covered very heavily here in the local market, as you might assume. So this guy calls back with another voicemail. Actually, you know what? No, the next podcast hitman is going to be Jerry Bamfield.

Like, it basically already happened. Some of that back then. Anyway, call me that. Oh, Jerry Bambi, all right. That's an interesting one, too. Maybe we'll put a poll up, I don't know. We'll see. Let's give the liable in the court.

Oh, seriously. Is it true, Mr. Hamburger, that the person won, said, Paul? Like, yeah, but it was a goof. Okay. That is your name, Mr. Hamburger. Correct. Mr. Hamburger. For the record.

We're going to need you to be helpful. We need you to be hamburger helpful We need you to be amperage helpful today. Uh, please stop smile talking. Please You're a master. This is a serious matter Hey, Carl you guys are all trying to figure out what podcast hitman was doing with the flesh off of his girls back Three little words for you fleshly was doing with the flesh off of his girls back. Three little words for you. Flesh lay. Got me back. Did he say three words?

Flesh lay? Yeah. That's not all Flesh lay works, sir. That's not what words work. That's not syllable work. I'm pretty sure everything about that was a rock. You know, Karth, thinking the other day, when I was listening to this show and the news

lady that reads the news said that she wasn't going to do sub-bretted news anymore. And then the next week, she's back doing internet news. That's like, San, hey, I'm not going to be a coffee shop cashier anymore. I'm going to be up a reach. You're still working at the Starbucks, honey. Just just because you've moved on from reddit to other website doesn't really mean much kind of uh... lateral movement you know what i mean

well anyway give me a call sounds like he almost got the joke he's real close to get the joke on that one uh... alright one. Alright, let's see here. Hey, so I was listening to episode 272, the 902-1-LMG episode today and you guys talked about podcast, hitman, and how kind of think about how often do you come across a murderer or somebody that like killed somebody and surprisingly enough, I've done at least I know of her effect so far. The first would have been my childhood babysitter who killed her parents.

That was the national news and the next one was my backyard neighbor who killed his girlfriend and burned her body and I was out fried when he was burning the trash slash body so that was awesome. And then a coworker in mind, his dad is actually a convicted murderer of two hitchhikes. I'm in the discord under Tugboat Jim. You guys, like I don't know, want to talk about or something. I'm more happy to share. If not, that's fine. I don't know what to say.

So I love you Carl. Goodbye. Yeah, I'm convinced, man. I went through my whole life not knowing murderers. And now everyone I know, I'm suspicious of. Are we behind? Do we need to be murders too? I don't know.

I need to catch up. I feel like I need to jump on the bandwagon. I'm a staff saying. I'm gonna start murdering people. I gotta get caught. 2021 here. I'm gonna start murdering people. I'm gonna start murdering people. I don't know. I need to catch up. I feel like I need to jump on the bandwagon. I'm gonna stop saying I'm gonna start murdering people. I gotta get caught in 2021 here. So I made a really bad hamburger helpful joke earlier. They got a bunch of oofs.

So I want to read gangrenously. This is how I should have phrased that. Mr. Bandfield has found himself in a real pickle here, Mr. Hamburger. I'm gonna need to grill you about your whereabouts and have you catch up to where we are in the case see your testimony cuts the mustard very well that's how you do it oh boy these long podcasts come and I swear to guy I just start to lose my mind yeah do you remember when we used to were like we need to keep it under an hour?

Oh, yeah. Now it's like fucking it. It's a marathon. Sholes were 37 minutes. It's like, yeah, that's fine. It's enough. It's enough already. All right, we got a fan of destiny calling into the show.

Hey, Carl. It's Josh from Arizona. I'm calling because I just finished, except for the Boy's-Hole segment, the last episode that you just posted for 902.0MZ or whatever the fuck it's called, that show sucked ass. But I just got to the teaser, my favorite part of the show, and that I used to play that game

and just letting you know it's dog shit now because there is so much of it. So in case you're wondering, I'm sure you won't be. That show will go on forever. There will be no end to it because there's so much of that lore and I'm very excited to see how fucking ass they are because I can attack People who play density have no life so I love the show Love you Kevin. If you're on. All right.

Got that voice belt. What on forever? That voice bell was like the plot and destiny. Let's see what he feels about me after this show. Well, I think you'd make it some good points now. I was like, can you just play a game and enjoy it? No, it's got to get fucking crazy for these lunatic fans. All right. Band practice guy called it a show Bambrades guy will be in Chicago that's exciting. You do a live voicemail. It's not like like in carbon Bambrades guys the bust I love that people think that that gets old it does not Here's a guy who

lives in Lombard Illinois Carl hamburger one week away Till the live show. It's right. Can't wait man. I cannot wait you know when You first announced a couple months back that you're coming along bar you're a no girl life event that i just about to get my pants because and i live in long barton i don't know i never would guess that you'd be coming to your car with suburb

your first wide show low on the one that I live in. Anyway, man. Destiny. I just had a question about the show. We're on the giver preview at all. So you're going to be any interaction with the crowd, any audience participation at all. Should we bring anything to the event?

Or are you just going to be flossing your teeth on stage for a couple hours while we watch anyway, let me know can't wait to meet you in your crew, you dick, crow, jandy, gonna be a good time, man, gonna be a good time and I'll probably pick up been i could tell someone uh...

when i'm there as well i'm in take care i'll bring us a thousand rich if you say so i said great question people want to know what the format of the show is going to be what i'm going to do is bring watermelons up on stage and when a smash them which should bring like rain ponchos if you're sitting close it's going to be hilarious

would you do you have like some kind of a large implement that you're sitting close it's gonna be hilarious. Would you, do you have like some kind of a large implement that you, does it have a name? It's the sludge mad at Cabin. Oh, that's, yeah. It's something I invented. Sludge it back. Okay. All right.

Why was that guy out of breath? That was the better question. No, I think he was nervous, but. All right, so he asked if they should bring anything, if there's any instructions, here are the instructions for everyone coming to the live show Sit down and shut the fuck up. I'm trying to do a podcast. All right. You're not the show. All right the show is the show So that those are the rules It's gonna work out guys. I swear to God. We're gonna keep things under control. We're gonna move things along

I got a whole outline for the show We're gonna hit a bunch of segments and have a bunch of people should be fine. At the do's tonight, a live show in Lombard, Illinois descended into madness as the crowd set the host on fire. The host was flossing his teeth at the time, man. That's a floss is highly toxic and flammable. The host was flossing his teeth at the time, man. That's a floss is highly toxic and flammable. The host formally Clubfoot Carl. His friends knew him as Clubfoot Carl.

His friends knew him as Clubfoot Carl. Also known as Mr. R or Mr. Hamburger or grimey as he liked to be called oh grimey oh shit yeah yeah I can see this going bad I can see that happening the fun thing is about it if you come to the show and it's a debacle, it'll be worth watching. Because you'll see all my hopes and dreams evaporate out of my body at once as I realize that this podcast you think is not for me. It's not going to work out. So no matter, it's a win-win for the audience, I would say.

A couple more real quick here. Holy shit, Carl. The fuck did heaven ever do to you? I have a more real quick here. Holy shit, Tarle. What the fuck did you have to never do to you? This podcast you made him listen to is just cruel. I fucking play Destiny and read its lore, and I can't really stand these guys. Lacking the context of what the fuck they're actually talking about, I have no idea how you got through it.

That... I can't... What Kevin must have done to you. Call me back. I'm sorry, Kevin. I'm sorry. I didn't know. What happened I done to you? I'm sorry, Kevin. Oh, this would be a fun episode.

I really fucked that up. Maybe I'll just pull that all and post and I should have just done the pop character a little Fuck I have another pop character yet god damn it. What the fuck? Funny I forget about Destiny What would my character think about the darkness is you're a guardian and now the darkness is coming into your realm Oh sweep our bot The sweep a bot Have an attack character

Devoted to claiming Oh, how do we Voucher-che-cleaming! Ho-ho-ho! Oh, how do we be a slow? This is the last voicemail of the segment here. Buzz Myers, what the fuck is this? Fucking Hoki Joki-E parody band, another one now, Carl? What do you think you can give Tom Myers some drinks and sing a shitty joke over your shitty music?

What the fuck? Why don't you go in on Rich Vod? Where is Jerry Benfield? What about Blaschic Michael? What the fuck is going on Carl? Get on your game here full-time audition now. Not by the fucking Jokie band. Hide out, play it out, and fuck the ice to toast. Listen to ice to toast. Yeah! Yeah. Yeah, so the new band I've been with Andy is called the Buzz Myers and uh, working on logos right now. We'll get something up on the web soon The people can check out all right Kevin again

Thank you for coming on the show. I really appreciate it all that you do for for me and for the isotopes That's thankless work and we appreciate it. Oh Well, thank you. I Know We'll see yeah, Cardiff electric said call him in the chat. So I'll be on the show. You should go on a show. Yeah. Have you listened to it? It's pretty good. It's a pretty good show. I'll have to check it out for sure. Yeah. Okay. Cool. Yeah, he's blowing up, man. He's getting all the big guests now. Get all the big guts

so All right, Gavin. Good to talk to you nice. Yeah, take it here. See it. What's with the dancing around the shit? I stink you hate me great. Goodbye. Ah, Carl. I love you. I got to go goodbye Goodbye Goodbye!