Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep308 - Almost Adulting with Violet Benson

Episode Date: April 24, 2022

Ready to learn about how to be an influencer and hit the G spot through the anus? Well, to be fair, I'm not sure that there's a way to be "ready" for these things so strap in. Trucker Andy joins the show to analyze this podcaster who has exactly two things going for her. We get jacked up for a minute. Then, it what will go down as one of the greatest things to ever happen on WATP, Purple calls in with exclusive audio of Stuttering John's latest stand up show in front of a dozen people in Florida. Purple is the king of the Dabblers! After a false ending, we watch a potato slap back at us, listen to some new parody songs, and talk to Vic about her upcoming stand up show with Vinnie and Shuli in Nashville! We're live in Nashville on May 14th, get tickets: https://bit.ly/watp-nashville Support us, get bonus episodes, and watch live every Saturday: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode three. Oh, okay. You know what I miss penis. Are you a boner guy? What a dick. What are you talking about? Are you a boner guy? You know what I miss penis cuz Cuz a row cuz a row slap a runie W-A-T-P-W-A-K-P! Hello, Robert Nixon, Cuzzle Roos, welcome to another episode. Who are these podcasts? The only show that thinks Rudy Giuliani should just leave the mascot. Everyone liked him for the first time since 9-11. Just leave it out.

I'm your host, Carl, with me this week, a guy who was super jealous, I got to hang out in a blockbuster video store last week. It's Trucker Andy! Hey, let's talk shit. Please go to who are these.com, we got our email address, a voice mail number, link to our subreddit, link to the discord server, link to our merchandise,

link to our YouTube channel, and that link to our Patreon and Supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month, we just posted another installment of Easy for You to Say. Yeah. With producer Chris on that one, what do we got like 20 more minutes into that buck? Yeah, not even.

It's great. How much is left? Hours. Oh, good. Hours to go. I want to participate in one of those. You're right. Coming soon, the one too many commentary episode that I did with Tony from Hack the

movies, the private part show that I did with Tony from Hack the Movies, the private part show that we did is now available on YouTube. If you're going to hack the movies, check out private parts with myself and Doug from Good Times Great Movies. Also I have to mention up front, tickets are on sale for our live show in Nashville on May 14th, w-a-t-p-live.com. There's a link in the show notes. And I'm very happy to announce who are these comics has been booked at a place called Never Never.

So that evening of May 14th, we got Shuly, we got Vinnie Paulino, we got Vic. We got a standup show people. Two and a three and a five. So that'll be, listen, I think Vinnie's coming along. Yeah. He's doing all right. We also encourage our listeners to give us a five-star

review on Apple Podcasts and then shittles all of us in the comments section, Vicko Beyond Later. Cool. To read some reviews, but first we'll be reviewing a show called Almost Adulting Podcast. This was a suggestion from Missy B. We have both listened to it separately.

We have not discussed it with you beforehand. Well, let's get into it. This is a show hosted by Violet Benson. Yeah. You don't know who Violet Benson is. She's been on Dr. Phil. She was on in Paul's Eve with Logan Paul. She's been making the rounds.

She's a big celebrity, big YouTuber. So it's called almost a delting. Almost a delting. Well, it's also called Daddy Issues and two cra craze or two tired to be crazy. It's all rebrand every couple months or so. It's the hallmark of a great show when you keep changing the name. Yeah, because you said you know and you go, hey man, you got to check out what was the second thing you said? Daddy issues. You got to check out daddy issues. I'm like, oh yeah, okay, I'll check that out.

So I'm looking all over daddy issues, all I could find was this show. So I'm guessing she renamed it. Right. And when I was scrolling through the episode, the titles, I'm like, why are the thumbnails different when you go back five episodes? Okay. And it's called something else. So almost adulting already, I hate this.

And there's already another podcast called that. Producer Chris listened to the wrong show. That's why he's down to go out. He proves once again, you have to leave these things to truck her in. I'm telling you anything. Amateur move. So the episode I listened to was with this guest, Emily Morse.

And she is from a show called Sex with Emily. And she gives sex advice. And from what I can understand, Violet also likes to talk about sex a lot. Is that what you got from this too, or was your episode different than that? Sure, this is like a Caller Daddy rip off, trying to piggyback on the success of that.

I'm sure there's a million shows like that, though. I don't think it, I don't think Call I don't think color daddy was the first or the last in this genre of semi attractive girls talking about their vaginas. Right. Talking about how much they like penises and their vaginas. Get ready for a lot of hot talk coming up here guys.

So I'll just start off, and I can pretty much just go in order because all of these clips are fucking ridiculous. And the question here is because, as they say multiple times, they don't want to yuck anybody's yum. So the question is, how do you tell your partner not to spit in your mouth without kink shaming them?

All right, because I know this is weird. Some girls don't want you to spit in their mouth. And they don't know how to tell you that. I would do it like this. Please don't spit my mouth. But this is how they doing. Okay how to tell you that. I would do it like this. Please don't spit my mouth. But this is how they're doing. Okay, so here's what. We both are not into getting someone to spit in our mouth,

but we may have a partner that's into it. So how do you not, how do you avoid kink shaming someone? Because there's nothing wrong with you like it. How do you avoid kink shaming someone? But also how do you then talk to your partner about the kinks that you're into without feeling embarrassed? All right, so I have a suggestion.

When your partner spits in your mouth, you say, what the fuck is wrong with you? Why are you spitting in my mouth? Girls mouths are for three things. Penises, balls, and you're lode. Not loogies. All right, and I'm sorry my mother lies less today I says early in the show. I apologize. She has a fast forwarded yacht

You could pull a power move and just spit the spit back in the guy's face Snowball the spit. Yes, yeah, snowball Lougey Interesting while it has been there done the shoppers Chuck or Eddie on the show today Then they're done there. So we can man splay in this to us. All right, you listen to a different episode than I did. Yes, I listened to an episode that was called

Creating Your Dream Job. And she didn't talk about that once. And nothing to do with it. And everything to do with fucking around at Coachella. But in my clip one, everything's her dream job. It's fucking on a Coachella, but in my clip one, everything's for Drew job. It's fun to go to Coachella. She, I think that she's gonna be cool with what we're doing over here.

You let us bully you and you take it and you enjoy it, okay? Yes, exactly. You're welcome. Yeah, right. So I think she's all ready for our feedback. They were gonna be giving her today. Good, excellent, because there's a lot for them to learn about podcasting.

Yeah, so when it comes to creating your dream job, the first thing you wanna do is go to Coachella. Let's have a little quick Coachella catch up. This past weekend was weekend one of Coachella after two years of having no Coachella, and that's kind of where everyone showed up to. I also went to Coachella, but as you know know I left after the first day because something annoyed me and I'm overly impulsive and then I got my car and drove home for two hours and

regarded it the next day. Something she said regarded it did I understand what she was saying. She has a problem. I like speaking English does she? Have you picked up on that? I didn't, but I am now. She has an accent, right? Where is she from? Does anybody know? Horr island? Yeah.

That would be my guess. Who gives a fuck about Coachella? Any, like Coachella's for rich Californians, right? Who gets a fuck about Coachella? You mean the biggest music festival in the world? I don't know, a single person that's ever fucking gone. That doesn't already live in California. Coachella, I thought was in like Tennessee.

Is it? I don't know. I don't know. No, I know, if you could send California. I would never be the coachella. It is for like 2% of the population. So I'm one of the discord. Where is Coachella?

Yeah. It's a Malbecurkey spell it. I was spell Coachella. It's not the city of Compton. That I know. Well, I don't even know where it is. That's how little I care about it. Well, it's obviously a very important thing

that people go to because it's a multi-day event. You stay for the first day and then you get pissed off and then you leave. Right. And that's how you live your life. Like a pro. All right, so let's talk about this woman Emily because this sex with Emily podcast,

I hope you want that we want to look at at some point. She has a lot of interesting ways to help you communicate with your partner and figure out what you guys are both into. Cause you know, sex can be a little messy, especially when you first start out a relationship. And what you really need is start filling out dittos. You should both sit down and complete dittos. When I think romance, that's what I think about.

But as far as finding out what your partner really loves in the bedroom, I mean, I have this great thing on my website, it's called the Yes, No, Maybe list. You should totally do this list. It's a free downloadable guide, and it has about 80 different sex acts. And you do it with your pride. And so many people have done this.

And because it's fun, It's like a list. It's like kissing. Yes, is this a yes and no or maybe spanking? Yes, no, maybe dirty talk. Spitting. Yes, no, maybe. And then you both take it and then you look at the list. You're like, oh, kissing?

Yeah. Is that this is what you give me to a prostitute? They're like, well, no, not kissing. Oh, okay, I was in the kiss. Like, okay, bye bye. You got to ask your partner if kissing is okay? Maybe have 79 questions out of the state of the 80. That seems like what that's.

Yeah, that should be an easy one. That's crazy. Do you like, when I peck you on the cheek? Yes, okay, okay, that's okay. All right, how about when I put my tongue in your ass hole? Is that something that you're into? Yes, okay, no. No, good, I do want to do that to me.

No, okay, got it, got it. Let's go back to kissing on the cheek again. Just watch porn with her. Is that something that you're into? Yeah, so check. No. Do you want to do that to me? No. Okay, got it. Got it. Let's go back to kissing. I got the cheek again. Just watch porn with her. Well, that's the thing is that they talk multiple times about how guys don't know how to

fuck because they watch porn too much. Okay. Because I guess there's a story I didn't pull the clip, but I guess Violet dated this guy right after high school who used to finger her Clit with this fingernail all I was picturing was uttering John during that Any of this long ass fingernail and he cut it and she started bleeding all over and had to go to the hospital Like what's porn videos you watching at that idea? That's our terrible idea I would just like someone's clint open with your fingernail.

Just dating Freddy Krueger. And she's giving me fucking sex advice. Oh yeah. Well, it sounds like maybe you need to, I was picked out. Too shy to tell them not to scratch my clint off. Yeah, seriously, that's what she said, too. She's like, yeah, he was doing that all the time.

And finally, just fucking ruptured it. Look, it sounds awful. All right. He was clawing my clit. I was biting his dick. You know? Yeah. Neither one wanted to say that they weren't into it.

So this is Emily talking about her show. Listen to a lot of people listen to my podcast together. A lot of couples listen to the sex with Emily together. And then they like stop it in a moment. They use it as therapy or as suggestions. Like what Emily says that most people want anal with a, you know, in this position. Have you ever tried anal that way?

Or what's your thoughts on anal? All right, so this is what I just heard. This was an average as a first show. That's basically you want your girlfriend to be into anal? Listen to sex with Emily. We'll talk about how she should be into anal. Okay. I use it as a sleep aid.

With all of the porn and celebrity sex tapes out there, do we need to tell people how to fuck? I feel like that's the one thing people have figured out from the internet is how to fuck. I guess some people need help. Some people are still needing help on this. All right, I don't want to get too gross and graphic. Andy, please, take over, Farah.

Sure, let's go back to what Violet is looking for in a husband and clip three. If my husband isn't literally turning into a chair for me because my fee got tired after I showed up at a festival seven hours late, then I'm sorry, but I don't want him. Ugh.

I'm sure guys are lining up for that job, right? No, raging cunt. This is right. First of all, I'm pissing you for being seven hours late. Yeah. And now I was supposed to fucking bend over backwards literally for you. Fuck that.

This is why men don't live as long as women because they're, you know. They want off. Digging ditches. We're ready to go. That's enough. We got it. They're digging ditches and killing spiders

and turning into furniture. Right. Some fucking transporter of a husband. It's too much. Listen, I understand. you have a vagina. That's awesome, I don't have one. But guess what? Tons of other people have one too.

Yeah, you're not the only fucking one that has one. All right, get over yourself. All right, well, she sounds like an asshole. So I'm already Rudy against her, so that's good. I'm really. It's always good I'm Rudy against the podcast. It's a good start. Yeah, it makes it more fun.

I can't believe you're wearing up the goat hands. It's a fucking guy. It's given to me, really leaning into it. Yeah, it makes it more fun. I can't believe you're wearing up the go-past. That's a fucking guy. It's given to me, really leaning into it. All right, keep going, buddy. Okay, more Coachella talk. Apparently Logan Paul's ex-anigan off again, girlfriend Olivia O'Brien was there singing some song

about the girl that he fucked and Clip Forer's talks about. Like how to stage or just like in the crown. Yeah, I always say, yeah. She was a performer. Yeah. So out of an eye, I'm like, with the, I don't know, I never heard of her. OK.

I hope that it was worth a fucking jaw-soulin. And then Logan just came out with a sign and said it wasn't worth it. So that just proves you, the men always come back, especially if you're performing a Coachella. They don't always come back. They usually don't. Yeah, right.

They came back because you were performing at Coachella. He wanted free tickets. That's why you think Logan Paul gave you free tickets. Yeah. I've known his acts helping him out. All right. I guess that's possible. Let's get back to gross sex talk.

And let's talk more about why someone who want to spit in someone else's mouth. You could even ask some questions. Tell me more about why you like to spit. I'm genuinely curious about what spitting does for you. And who knows? Maybe the way they explain to you, be like, spit. And you know, it can turn you on the phone.

It can turn them on. So you're like, okay, let's do it. Like it's not my thing, but it's your thing. Let me tell you why I like to spit in your mouth. I want to humiliate you, because I'm an asshole. That's the only answer why you'd want to spit in somebody's mouth. There isn't like a romantic answer to that.

They're like, oh, okay, well now that you put it that way, let's go. I had to bury you about a practical reason. You know, I like a wetter blow job. So, I you needed an extra spin. It's very practical. I'm an asshole. What don't you fucking understand?

Don't you get it? I feel like it's pretty self explanatory. Okay, then they get into the G spot. Okay. Doesn't exist. Wow, that's the cute angle they have as well. There's a smith going around Not the Santa Claus is real. It's a different type of myth but I'm similar that women has it have a g-spot at this point My question is is having a g-spot a myth and where is my g-spot?

Is it in the North Pole? Is that the answer? It's not the Santa Claus myth. That's a different one. Get it? There's a lot of fun over here. This podcast is a lot of fun. Let's get into some more Vajitatok, which I can never get a doubt of the super hot Vajitatok. Think of like your clitoris like this little knob here, but then there's these legs and it looks like a Like that like it looks like a what is it like a chicken like a Washbone and here's a clipper. Wishbone. Yeah, exactly. That's hot Let's say to my fucking health teacher talk about sex legs like mr. P nut

It's like my being is running around with a little stick figure legs on it Oh, I wishbone Bona never heard that. It's horrible. All right, but the great thing about the G spot is that you can give a girl an orgasm through anal. And this is the one thing I choose to believe from this show. Wait, is that why some women think that they're having a G spot orgasm when they're having anal when they're laying on their back?

Yes. Because it, uh, through an o it hits the wall to the gspot. Exactly. There's a thin membrane. It's exactly it. There's a, I keep coming closer to you. There's a thin membrane that separates your anus from your, your, your vaginal canal. So that membrane when you're having anal for many vulva owners again It's all different, but it can hit up against that G spot or that G area and you're more likely to have an orgasm

You're fucking know all about this shit. All right That's a pretty good reason for having anal There's the G I mean I can't hit the G spot any other way. There's only one path to the G spot And then it's through the asshole. Yeah. Do you want an orgasm or not? Right. No taco Tuesday for you. It's not about me. I'm doing everything I can over here.

I just need some lube, and for you to say yes, every now and again. All right, I'm gonna gross out by myself. Um, Andy, what else you got out of here? All right, so when you're creating your dream job and you can't go to Coachella, yeah, you could go to Revolfest, which is like the poor man's Coachella.

Oh, okay, cool. So if you couldn't get tickets to Coachella, then Revolfest may be for you. If you don't have tickets to actual Coachella, you're able to attend that festival. And they have performers, they have swings, they have everything. And everything! Swings? Swings was number two? It sounds like a really lame festival.

A sandbox with only a little bit of dog shit in it, everything! Is there a guy with mushrooms at least? What are we talking about, swings? That's so funny that that was the second thing. The performers. They had swings, everything. This guy who swallows swords. What are we talking about, Swings? There's so funny that that was the second thing. The two-formers. They had swings, everything. This guy who swallows swords.

It's a swing set. What the fuck are we talking about? I didn't even wanna go to go to cello. Now I gotta go to this fucking thing. Some terrible. Swings. Oh boy. Well, in Clip 6, Carl,

there's trade secrets about how to be an influencer. Okay, good. I want to know that. Yeah, what's here? I want to influence people. This is trade secrets. So they're probably never going to hire me again for admitting this. But they make you post so many posts that you don't really have a chance to attend the festival. I'm fully enjoy it because a lot of times the girls are not doing really care for whoever's performing and after two seconds they're bored and they're taking more selfies, but a lot of times we're stuck to having to do like five posts and like five taitoks and all this stuff.

Oh, it's so much worse. What a hard life. I have to take five pictures of myself and I have to listen to the chain smokers and I don't even care about them It's like why you why did you elect to go to a music festival? We don't care about the fucking performers. Oh, so this is an asshole who's staring at her phone all day long every day So it's not like she's like oh should I get my phone out and take a photo of myself? That's all you're doing anyway. Yeah, what's the problem here?

I'm I'm I'd rather be doing right now. I mean I'm on Twitch and I have to play video games It's such a fucking drag. What the fuck I have to be Snoop Dogg and Call of Duty Damn it. Do you see that by the way? No he's a new character in Call of Duty. Is that right? Snoop Dogg. Yeah. That's funny. He gets once to the German soldiers. It's pretty accurate. It's kind of how I went down All right, so this is some advice for Mr. Vick. I don't know if he listens to our show or not cool But our review girl Vick her husband Listen up Do you have any tips though for men?

And then we'll wrap it up just to play my game. Do you have any do you have any tips though for men who are not well in doubt? Because you know as we're we're focused so hard now around you know body positivity So of course it's important to also be body positive when it comes to men. Yeah, what about those guys with small decks? What are they supposed to do? I have a suggestion. Two in the bank and one in the state. Yeah, I'm a shocker.

Obvious answer. You may. Dr. Carl. Sure they've already figured that out. Hit the G spot. You know, eat the pussy. That's where they answer, right? I Am Dr. Carl You eat the pussy that's where the answer is is like am I a doctor now? Why do you say that because that's literally the answer that they get of course it is and I love that Of course is it and he's like I know the answer He's not just the code of a podcast

He's the go- small penis, is there? So Violet knows a guy who has a small penis, and he's got it all figured out. But if you have a, you're not happy with your penis size or you're insecure about it, like I promise you, there is a penis for every pot. Yeah, and my friend who... Like a lid for every pot, there's a penis.

You're gonna find your person, and it might not be every person, but if you're letting your penis size at your height hold you back, it's just like the person who's letting their left breast bigger than the right breast or there are three pounds of weight hold them back from dating it. So the way that she can kind of understand where guys are coming from with a small penis is like well it's like when you're three pounds overweight, I've never met a girl who was three pounds overweight. That does not exist.

That's not an overweight girl. Like, remember when you were three pounds overweight? Oh, God, it was horrible. That's imperceptible. Oh, God, I couldn't even go out to the club with three pounds overweight. So, what? Pressed is bigger than the other?

Yeah. Gross. Get outta here! Hey, welcome back to Body Shavecast with Andy and Garthole. So anyway. I wouldn't fuck you with my two-inch cock. Our friend, our friend Violet, was trying to say that she had a friend that she knows sufferers from.

And I have a friend who doesn't has an average penis. He coined the term boyfriend dick. And he's very into going down on a woman because be a good love, be a good pleaser. So he focuses so much on that and making those sure the girl comes before they even start having sex. And then she's not even thinking. All right. So you can have boyfriend dick or do what I do.

Cuck, cuck. You know, that way I'm like, Hey, why don't you just have like a guy with a bigger penis come in and satisfy you? And, you know, we'll take care of things after that. Yeah. You know, that's another way to go about it. How does, how does Lickin' a Twatt make me feel better about my small penis? I don't understand that. It's not about you.

And it's her feel better about my small penis. Not me though. It's not about you. All right, so there was a time when she made a guy cry and she feels pretty good about that for some reason. Well, then I had no problem to tell him he wasn't the best. And I was like, you know what, you can't make me come.

So get the fuck out of my house. And he cried. If I cried every time I couldn't make a girl come, I'd be dehydrated. I would die from dehydration. I'm like, didn that he cried because of it. I'd be like, oh, whatever. Who cares? It's a difference. How did that affect me? Yeah. I came. I'm fine. Yeah. It's a difference. Oh, you're still here. They were cares of joy because he was getting away from you. All right. Let's go back to Coachella. Sure, and I just, I was delighted when I heard the,

this term dropped in clip seven. There were so many people that were trying to attend that the buses going to the Revolt Festival were way too packed that there were so many people trying to get on the buses and they couldn't, that some people were trying to document their experiences and they were calling it the fire festival because of how unorganized it was because it was the first time revolved, tried to kind of dabble with influencers and with people who shop on their sides.

They got a change of name to dabble fuzz. Dabble fuzz! There's a whole sobriety which show up for that. Right. Yeah. Sounds great. I love that she goes. It was so hard to get to this festival where there's a whole sub-run, it would show up for that. Right, yeah. Sounds great. I love that she goes, it was so hard to get to this festival where there's a performer and swings. Are people start for entertainment? They don't own an X-Bice. What's going on here? Why are people trying to get to revolve fast?

It must be more to it than that. It could be right. Alright, in a clip, eight, Carl. Yes. There is, she has a friend that is a basketball player named Chandler that apparently is fucked everyone in LA except for her. So that's what this is. The thing about Chandler, person, he has a baby mama now.

But before, years before, he has at this point fucked half of my friends and half of the girls in Los Angeles. That's how we know each other because he's dated half of my friends has been inside of them Never been inside of me. We've always been homies and we always just get each other It's a weird way of saying they haven't had sex together. Yeah, and are you happy about it or unhappy about it. Why doesn't he pick me and out of all of the crazy lunatic insecure broads in LA He's smart enough to not fuck you.

Yes, that's what he's saying. Which is that say about violet and how crazy she is. And I'm starting to wonder, she kind of sounds like a kind of sister, doesn't she? That's that. You're still like suck on this accent. That's so weird.

I guess it's a Southhor island, is that it? Yeah. It's very distinct to a specific spot. I can't put my finger on it quite. All right, so then there's a fun part of the show where they ask the listeners to send in the most embarrassing things that have happened to them in bed. And then they go through and they read all of these fun stories starting with this one. Okay, this guy said, I have a very hairy ass. I pooped in public toilet and then I accidentally left a small skid mark on her sheets.

That's a lot of information. That's actually known as the Amber herd hello. Yeah. That's when you wipe your ass on the girl's sheets. It's a lot of fun. This one, this story, not as fun as that story, guys. So if you have an erection right now, you might want to comment down before It's a lot of fun. This story, not as fun as that story, guys. So if you have an erection right now,

you might want to comment down before you hear this. She wanted to have sex on top, but she actually came down on it, sat down on it wrong. She fractured his Johnson, and then his mom had to take them to the ER. That's embarrassing. Embarrassing. That's not the problem here.

Fractured as cock. Oh, how embarrassing. No, horrific. Yeah, that's terrible. It's something the worst thing possible. Mom, she broke my dick again. Boys, my face ran. Look at me with a bent up cock in front of my mom. I'm so embarrassed by her. So then they go on because they're both doctors to explain that you can break a boner and why that is. Your boner isn't bone. So you can actually actually...

Uh oh, retarded alert. Retarded alert class. Did they know you can fracture bones too? Your boner's not a bone, so you can fracture it. Yeah they know you can fracture bones too? Your bone is out of bones, you can fracture it. Yeah, but you could also fracture. Wait, what? Why do they- What are you talking about?

I'm actually more surprised that you can fracture a bone because it isn't a bone. And they're acting like, well, yeah, duh. Of course you can do that. Are they trying to? Yeah. It sounds like a wager. And it just keeps getting weirder and weirder with these fucking stories.

And they're so into it. I can't figure out why they think this is a good thing. Sarah said, my new dog started humping my partner from behind while he was doing me from behind. That's awesome. That's all right. I wonder if they have to stop. It's funny.

I don't think it's funny! Listen, it's all funny games that we shits out puppies. That is a fucking problem. This guy's getting fucked by a dog gather like, that's hilarious. No, that's awful. I shit a cackr-spaniel. Oh, you guys want to hear the most ridiculous story yet? Sure.

This one is bonkers. Listen very closely to this one. She had sex with a guy and she slept over. And then in the morning, it must have been in university. And then in the morning, she went to use a bathroom and she had to go number two. So she used number, she didn't, she went number two and then she seized the bathroom doesn't work. So she was like all freaked out and oh I think, I think he said I'm gonna go to class so you can see yourself out. So she decided to use the bathroom before she left. So she was a well-known

apartment. So then when she went number two, it wouldn't flush. So she decided to put her poop in a bag. And then she put in the bag and then she put it somewhere in the kitchen while she was gathering her things. She gathered her things. She walked out and right as she walked down the door close, she realized that the poop bag is still in the kitchen. That's horrible. I call total bullshit on that story. So I know the women are dumb, they don't know you can pick up the lid. What's the time when I get that?

But why would you scoop out your shit put it in a bag? There's no way that happened, right? Just the logistics of that alone. So I'm crazy to me. Yes. Scooping your shit out of the toilet because you're embarrassed by it. I'd be more embarrassed if I'm crazy to me. Scooping your shit out of the toilet because you're embarrassed by it.

I'd be more embarrassed if I shit in the kitchen. You did it all the time. Yeah, it's worth it. What you did is worse. Yeah, you're up for it. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, you put it in the microwave. Whenever you did with it.

Imagine this class guy can't still do you, he walks back and you stand there with their shit in the head. And he's like, oh, I should love this to the toilet. I said, boy, who I like dumb. Now that's embarrassing. Oh, what a dumb story. What a dumb dumb story for dumb dumbs. All right, Andy, what do you got?

Okay, so back to the basketball player. She gets interested in her. Is he a professional basketball player? No, no, no. There's tons of washed up athletes out there. Yeah. But apparently, Violet and this basketball player's girlfriend

have a best friend in common, which is whatever everybody's their best friend. Sure. So she tells this story that the girlfriend doesn't know her in any single way, which is also a red flag that is like, is this best friend, really your best friend? If this woman has no idea who you are, you've never been spoken of.

And really this clip is only I'm only playing this because it speaks to her insecurities of like, oh, don't you know who I am? I have this podcast that Andy's never heard of until this week and we'll never listen to again. So that's what this clip is. I acted. So he's like, oh my God, I want you to be my girlfriend. And he's like, this is my blank girlfriend. I'm just not going to feel like saying her name. And it's my blank girlfriend. I was just like, oh my God, hi, nice to meet you. And he goes, and Chandler goes to his girlfriend like, oh my God, babe, like this is daddy

issues, she's so hilarious, like, and she goes, I don't know who that is, which was already weird to just get so aggressive. And I'm like, so I'm just like still smiling like, okay, look, that's so weird. And he's like, no, babe, then like you should check out that page of daddy issues. I'm she she like, I've never seen it. And he's like, no, no, babe, but like it's so weird. And he's like, no babe, then like you should check out that page of daddy. It should, I've never seen it. And he's like, no, no babe, but like it's so funny. Like you'll crack up, like I'm telling you guys, we probably have so much in common.

You will love daddy. She goes, I've never heard of it. And I'm just standing there like, what the fuck is that going on? And he's just like, yeah, but like you should totally check it out. She's hilarious. And then she looks at me and she goes,

I have literally, I've never heard of you. And I'm like, yeah, but like you should totally check it out. She's hilarious. And then she looks at me and she goes, I have literally, I've never heard of you. And I'm like, okay. I like her. Yeah. I'm sorry, I don't follow you. I've never heard of you. Like she repeats that again. I'm like, okay.

And I'm thinking like, I'm sorry, bitch, but my page is gonna thrive with or without one extra follower. So like, unnecessary, but I'm like, okay, whatever. Like, that's cool. Like, I don't care if someone knows daddy issues or not. Like it doesn't change my life. So I'm just like still smiling, a little weirded out. I'm like, okay.

That story was 80 seconds long. It sounds like you're kind of buttered. Yeah, I swear that's only like one third of how much he talks about. She goes on and on and tells it over and over again. It's just like, what? You never heard of this? You never heard of me. I did find the right podcast and I did make it through that story.

Okay. And I understood that that would be one of the worst things you could tell this person. I don't know who you are. We don't know who you are. Yeah. She thinks she's a celebrity. Right.

For sure. And by the way, I do want to point out, just because you said you listen to the right podcast, you're not getting paid. All right. I see what you're up to. I just want to point out in our discord, our buddy Alex put a photo of

Violet and she does have some BFTs. She is talented in one way. All right. Hey, you know what? I might subscribe to her YouTube channel. Maybe she does have something going on after I take it all back There's a lot of filters and angles and lighting and angles and lighting. The jokers are so fuzzy. Giant tit filter on Instagram. That gets me every time. Damn it. But yeah, I just thought that it was funny because you're an influencer that's

I didn't find anything and that's very exciting there. I hope that chick was actually that rude to her. I doubt she was. It's probably how she was filtering that. Oh, right. But I hope that she really was. I don't know the fuck you are. Why don't I know who you are? Your diamond doesn't.

Oh, you're a YouTuber with 30,000 subscribers. Give us a shit. I've never heard a daddy issue, and that's all she heard. Yeah. And she can't stop hearing it. They're in LA, so... All I... All I...

So that's like really the only thing that matters is being famous and having a big YouTube following. Someone telling you they've never heard of you, it's the worst thing that matters is being famous and having a big YouTube following. Someone telling you they've never heard of the worst thing that could happen. And it was the girlfriend of a guy has never even been inside her before. Yeah, right. What is she so jealous?

What is this girlfriend so jealous about? So the one guy or the one woman that he hasn't fucked. Right. Who's she care? Yeah. Do you wanna go through your other clips here? Yeah, my very last one. This is just her not being able to talk again.

OK. But before everyone starts to freak out, there's no hard evidence of this. People are saying she's Russian, by the way. I know her folks are Russian. I did pick up that information. I don't know if she was born in Russia. I stayed with Ukraine, Carla.

Fair enough. But before everyone starts to freak out, there's no hard evidence of this yet. And this rumor started on that one, Celeb Instagram that I cannot pronounce. But of course, Heather knew I would not be able to pronounce it. So she wrote it out to me. She wrote it out for me.

It's do, moa. Because I've been calling it doxmoi. And she has not corrected me until today. So I thought the Instagram was called Doxmoie. And that was the celebrity Instagram, but no, it's Dumas. It sounds way more French, way more classy. Yeah, yeah.

More classy than Doxmoie. To take away from this is that Heather is hilarious. And she's letting this moron embarrass herself all over YouTube. It's a pretty good day. Good one. I have a little treat on here for people who like to podcast and are learning how to podcast.

I get questions from time to time. Carole gonna give me some tips, some pointers. One of the things you wanna do is when you bring a guest on your show, you wanna make them uncomfortable and put them on the spot and just watch them squirm. That's always a good way to have a show. Do you have a funny story? And no.

No. I think you do. That's always a good way to have a show. Do you have a funny story? And now? Um, no. I think you do. Oh my god, I can't think of funny to- You do. I- Come on. Oh my god. I don't end this moment.

I don't have a funny story. I'm so sorry. My life is fucking funny stories. Let me think right now. I have a funny sex story. Go. All right, then this fucking doing it! She asked her three times in a row,

you sure you don't have one, you want to have one, you want to pretend you have one, you ever take a shit out of a toilet paper? Oh my gosh. Yeah. So uncomfortable. It sounds like a super cut of them, just saying funny story.

Yeah. I have a funny story, funny story, funny story. Funny story, I have a funny story. Okay, you tell your funny story, then okay, here's a funny story. Stop asking your guests to run your show for you. Can you please be entertaining for like a half a second or something?

Fill some amount of time please. That was a two-parter by the way. That episode with Emily Morris. Oh, man. Sucks with Emily podcasts. You can't get enough of that. There's a second part. Yes.

All right. And is that enough on this almost adulting podcast? Missy B, have we done enough on this? It's a podcast. It's a podcast. I mean, the point is that she's a Russian mail order bride with big titties. There's a pointless to do a podcast. Your titties can't be seen.

It's a YouTube. It's a YouTube video. She wasn't really dressed the way that I would have enjoyed based on what I'm seeing in our discord coming through. Exactly. That's what I'm just trying to find out now that I was. All right, let's get into. And this starts off with a suggestion from Adam Thoreau, who always brings us great cringe of the weeks. Cringes of the week? Great cringes of the week.

That cringes of the weeks. No, that's not fair. We both cringes of the weeks. And Thoreau said in a show called The Morning Drive with David. Now David is a trucker. Andy. Mm-hmm.

I know him. You might all know each other. You might be able to relate to this Andy and I know him you might know each other You might be able to relate to this Because he does his show that's very noisy He said fortunately this episode it wasn't raining out. So it's not as bad as some dives But it starts up. I have three clips on here the first one proves that he does do post-production editing to some degree Who's ever gonna forget this? Jada, I love you.

GI Jane 2 can't wait to see it. Alright, so we obviously pulled an clip from something else, put it in a show so that he could talk about it. Well, the second clip shows that he doesn't always remember to put in things and posed. That relationship seems toxic to me. Especially since, you know, not too long ago, she said this. So I mean, maybe she should show will that. I don't know. Okay. So he says the second clip is proof he's not going to podcasting. And then the third clip he says, see above. Oh, and then not too long ago, this clip came out

and I was like, what the shit? See, I mean, that's what that poor dude is dealing with. The morning drive with David. Good job, David. Good stuff. And then I have another cringe of the week. And this one comes in from Kran Baruni on Discord. And this show is called The Same Drugs with Megan Murphy.

She has a guest down, Michelle Evans, who's running for a state representative seat in Texas. This is a long clip. There's a lot of dead air. So let's just kind of muscle through it together. Shall we? All right. Go back to Pro's here. Teaching what we're supposed to teach, you know, reading, writing, math, science, history, interpreting history in

Oh, I lost your audio. I think maybe something got unplugged. I can't hear you anymore. I like Nirvana unplugged better. Can you hear me? Yeah, you're back. Oh, I can't hear you. Oh, can you hear me now? Yeah.

Sorry. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's all good. No, it's okay. No way. Um, can you hear me now? I'm totally screwing this up for you. No, no, it's okay. It's easy. It's easy to, it's easy to fix another thing. That's okay. Yeah. You're right. Yeah. This is easy to fix another thing.

You have a solution. Yeah. You know, just pull this whole thing out. It's still going. This reminds you of every Zoom call I have during the week. Yeah. Oh, no, I can't hear you. Can you hear me?

Oh, I'm muted. Oh, you're muted now. Yeah. No, I'm muted. No, no. Oh, it's unplugged. Okay. Now, I know the question is. I'm so sorry about that. It's okay. Um, so, uh, I'm trying to think of, yeah. Okay. So you were saying, oh, wait, I lost again.

There's a lot of that air. What are you going to say? I know the question is two plus two. And I know the answer is four, but I'm just going to leave it blank. Yeah. Of course. If the answer is edit this out. Yeah, she was so sorry I'm ruining your show. No, you're not. It's fine. It's fine. Oh wait, no, she is. Yeah, this is actually terrible. And by the way, as I'm talking, this is still dead air.

This is still the show that they put out. And three, two, one. I'm having issues on the end. I could not. Oh, there you back. Okay. Can you hear me now? It's going on. I'm going to nightmare.

I can hear you now. The female stomachs. The staggering John's. Can you hear me? I do want to point out that this does go on for another two minutes or so. I just decided to just that. Can you hear me?

Put that all in there. Can you hear me? Wow. Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Sure, that'll be a successful run for state representative. If you're doing media like that, it's good stuff. Wow.

I haven't even talked about this in a little while, but I actually was listening in on a recent. Chak-toe, Redu-Show. It's a Chak-toe, Redu-Show. I love people to get jacked up for the Chak-toe Review Show with host Cameron Sully Sullivan. He has a guest on Zach Schaefer and Zach is a first time guest. And boy is Cameron prepared to talk to him and introduce him.

And let's get right into this jacked up show. Welcome. Welcome back. Another exclusive episode that we are doing on a cult franchise. I got podcasting after darks and $2.00 like these exact shaper. Hey, happy to be here. Alrighty. So it's first time guests. I've always just allowed everyone to just kind of do a little quick introduction. I've been following Zach's many shows for two years now,

really dig a style and just how it just breathes the just life into just forgotten pop culture and how it affects his own persona, his talent and voice acting career. How are you my man? He goes, I like to look first I'm guess, introduce themselves. I can't stop themselves from trying to remember everything you know about the guy. I really careasmatic guy like me does a really entertaining show like I do. So this gets really meta very quickly because he's talking to his guests. So Cameron's talking to Zach about guests that Zach has on his other podcast. And they're not good guests.

And then we interview celebrities and actors and directors from connected with the movies that we love. And I can't believe you got the one Latina guy from that mirror on the street and where Jesus was like, I thought he had just left the movie industry all together. Yeah, J. Zoo Garcia, for those that don't know, his name was Nick Corey in the 80s. I couldn't believe you got J.S.U. Garcia from Nightmare at Elf Shedder show. How'd you pull that off?

So, I did a little research on this J.S.U. Garcia guy because I'm like, yeah, how did he get such a famous guy? Do you remember the movie Gacha from 1985? Actually do. I do too. So this guy played the best friend of the protagonist in the movie Gacha. So that's pretty impressive. Hey, today I have a great guest on the show.

He had a guest on his show. You've never heard of. Yeah. Who was gonna move you've never seen. How'd you get him? Well, he's a fucking nobody now. Yeah. It was pretty easy

But I do want to say this guy's that it's pretty proud of all the celebrity guest that he's had on the show or just Celebrities that he's met randomly. Yeah, I mean we've we've used you name it. We've Met them or interviewed them. We interviewed we have an upcoming interview with Barry Bostwick Barry Bostwick the Barry I guess so I was gonna try to stuff up coming interview with Barry Bostwick. Barry Bostwick. The Barry Bostwick. Whoa. I guess so I was gonna try to stutter. He's like, you name it. I'm like, well, I can call up some names.

But if you're gonna throw up Barry Bostwick, then okay, maybe you're right. Maybe you do have some good celebrity guests on there. So now Cameron's interviewing Zach about his interview with Barry and he's pretty jacked up about it. If there's anything I know about Sully, Cameron Sully's telling everybody he gets jacked up. A movie called Megaforce in the 80s that I love.

HBO still plays it to this day. You know they secretly love it. Oh yeah. I mean, if you've never seen Megaforce, you should check it out. But yeah, I have a lot of fun on those shows. And did you tell you about the German fan club? I think you might have. Yeah, either of these drops, by the time this air is the interview will probably drop

or it may drop a week after depending on when you air this. But he's got, yeah, he told some stories about the underwear that he sells on his website. So it's, I'm telling uh, ha ha ha ha ha. It's, I'm telling you, it's a real story. And the guy is, is a hoot. So, ha ha ha ha. Oh, wow.

He goes, he tells a story, didn't say what the story was, he goes, ha ha ha ha. What? Ha ha ha. That's insane. Wow. All right, well, I mean,

I can't knock them too much because they are conversationalists and they have a great conversation. This is the Gus Zach just stopping mid-sentence, just for no reason at all. No, it's funny. I was looking at the cast earlier today and I forgot that German more rony is in it, right? And he's in that show Hanna

right now on Amazon Prime, which is the television version of the movie that Luke Bisson was a part of, right? So there you go with uh, or totally. And so I just love I do it's interesting that. Oh, it's so great. You know, the thing about bad is totally Andy, are you still here with us this year? I'm here to throw. Yeah. She's surprised. All right, last clip I have from this. So this guy's promoting, he has two podcasts in which he talks to wash-up actors. And he tells you the things that wash-up actors have to say because this is a good tease.

And now we wanna go check out his podcast. Yes. I will say on $2.00 or late fee and podcasting after dark, we've interviewed quite a few actors and so often with these people that kind of lose touch of in Hollywood, it's for sometimes it's those reasons where they're like, forget it, I don't need this lifestyle anymore. It's too much.

Oh, you mean that washed up the actor stop getting work and that's why they stop working? And then they go on your show to talk about that? Yeah. Sounds pretty good. It's not that Hollywood is too much. It's not enough. They, you weren't getting any work. So you let me industry.

You should. It's a chapter. Reduce your whole. get any work. So let me just show it so fucking bad Cameron somebody posted this was like a month ago or something somebody posted in the discord I think no the subreddit that Cameron showed up on this reality show about cheaters, and this person was out on the date, and Cameron was the date, and the guy came in with the camera crew, and they're like, oh, you're cheating.

So it's obviously fake, because that's like the kind of acting job this guy Cameron gets, is like being a villain on a reality show. I don't know, do you see that? Do you have any catch that? It was really interesting. He's so awkward.

I don't know why he gets, he's gonna be the guy that your girlfriend's cheating on you with. All right. I mean, maybe that's a good thing. Maybe you can then move on. He's definitely a bull cuck in losers. I have a fun treat for us today,

because our buddy Stutt Joe was down in Florida this week doing a live standup show, and a person who went to his show Recorded it finally and what's to talk to us thank God Yeah Gakia purple. Oh, yeah, I was your my testing testing. Hey, so great Yeah, what happened was the the webcam mic was picking up instead Whatever Here's the deal Nobody needs to know.

So purple is a proud supporter of who are these podcasts. He's the guy who sends all the cat picks to Vic. Nice. It's his claim to fame and he lives down in Florida. Out of control. And he lives out in Florida. And John was at the black box. And you went to his show.

I did and it was by far the worth 30 minutes I've ever sat through. So he doesn't even do 45 or an hour? Oh, barely. Wasn't he the headloina? Well, there was an opener Steve Zimmerman. He did a movie I think called Taps or something. He was decent.

Okay. He got the crowd warmed up. Made a lot of jokes about how empty the theater was, which I don't think John liked very much because he took an extra five minutes even getting out on the stage. I have that. Can I play the beginning of your audio here?

Please. This is funny because he trips right out of the gate. You know, like John just can knock out of his own way. How many people do you think were there watching this show? So the peak was 15 during Steve Zimmerman. And three people left when John appeared on stage. How much were tickets I need to know? So tickets when I bought them were $20.

And then they started giving away free tickets if you bought a bar card. I saw that. Yeah it took it to her free eventually All right, so this is introducing Stuttering John and him making his way to the stage A smattering I'm gonna give it up for the suckers on my lens guys. He'll be so great if he came out with half of a ham sandwich. Because he didn't have a G. Well, he came out with two more. Yeah, of course he did. I'm sorry. I was a hell of a intro.

I was a intro, I was leaning on the cricket in the back. How we know a condition would be difficult to open my car. I know I'm really packed. I know I'm really packed. I know I'm really packed. I know I'm really packed. I know I'm really packed. I know I'm really packed. I know I'm really packed. I was a intro, I was leaning on the brick to the back. How we know a condition would be this whole trouble in car. And I'm really packed in today.

Give it up for everybody that's playing in the ring. Woo! Woo! I'm guessing you didn't go on his podcast next day and say, ah, we could have done better with the top dance. I'm guessing you thought this was an amazing show that he did. I crushed it.

So he came up with two cores lights in his hands, Purple? Yeah, he came out with two cores lights. And I didn't have time to clip it, but he finished them within like 15 minutes. And I see just kept taking swigs from the empty one that he still had in his hand. Yeah. Well, he's still adding his hand. Well, he's got no CD.

See, so he has to drink the beer and the pretend he's drinking it for another three times. He's put it down two more, put it down one. I could tell by the look at his crowd, I'm going to need four more coins. Well, he's sig, he's signaught to the bartender eventually to get him another beer, but she didn't just ignore you. You're credit's no good. I'm sure he hit his limit before the show even started.

So let me ask you this because I have not seen Centering John do stand up live. Does he wait for an applause break to take a sip from his beer? How does that work? Well, it was barely any applause to begin with. So he just drinks whenever, really. What else? What else? He did, yo, skull.

I forgot to cut that. But when he finished his second beer, he looked at the bartender and went, go! And nothing happened. So I will say that you sent me the entire 35-minute clip. And I think I might want to turn this into a bonus show or something.

I mean, the audio is not great, but we can decipher what's going on on here. Is there any timestamps though, purple that you want us to go into and check out? Yeah, I sent a text file of the timestamps on Discord. You did. I don't know. Yes.

Can you look at those and tell me where to go? I mean, to go on here and sell that. Sure. Can you look at those and tell me where do you want me to go? I'm here, is that all that? Sure. From six minutes to six, 16, there's his first belly rub joke, and it was disgusting. Okay. But like a fucking bumble-up. You know what I mean?

Now we're taking, you know, like I'm sure my whole family is short and bowel shaped on top. This is short for skinny little legs and bowel shaped. My whole family is built into gov'n head and a foals. Our family's all looks like Donkey Kong. And my wife was such a hick and she was like, she was dying months pregnant and she insisted on where it comes from She stopped

A freaking angry You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? She's in a little like a hand grenade. You know what I'm saying? Just add it to punchline He's having rings out of yes, I know what you're saying It I'm I should have I should have realized it didn't translate very well to audio, but for that entire bit, he pulls up his shirt all the way to his nipples and just starts rubbing his belly.

And his pants are fairly well down. You can see like way too much. I don't want to know any of this. Yeah. It's a crazy. You need try my head. You need to find it. Do us a personal time off. You don't come back in June. At the very end when he does his second belly robe, I'm in the squeegee joke. I legitimately had my head in my hands just holding vomit. We all know the squeegee joke

because he jerks off onto his stomach and then uses his underpants elastic to squeegee it down and do it. Since we're on the vomit train, let's go to his fake orgasm bit. It's from 10.05 to 11.17. I can't wait. I'm so excited about this. Now you're taking the bar out of the piece. I'm gonna shoot and I spray the car. Now it's here, the point's gone. Now I don't know about you, and you gotta go, friend. What I'm having sex, I started getting tired.

Right? Like, I started getting tired. Like, because you can't keep up with you, you know? You know I started getting tied and I swear on my life, I paid an orgasm. And ladies, we have no business. It may not take more cash, you ladies have plenty of practice, you know?

We don't. You know, in the island, so I've been having a little bit of a risk and I'm having access to my car. So I just say, oh, man, man, man, man. Because you didn't come. I was the only one who did,

and this is the problem. Now I'm thinking of our gaffers. I think we do enroll rehearsals now. I'm thinking of our gas. I think we do a rolling verse over there. I'm thinking of our gas and she speaks out to me like I never called me again. I don't think that was because you couldn't come. I think it's because you're raging alcohol. I'm not going to start feeling bad for the sky. That was how much time did we just spend. It was almost, it was over a minute. What we just listened to, and he's still building to like a joke I got.

He's like, get it? I was faking the orgasm, and then 30 seconds later. Cause I was the one faking the orgasm, got it? Like, yeah. Just like no, just like no joke in there. And if I didn't know the history of this guy, I'd think he's so sad. Yeah.

And you'd be right. She's sneaking out like the audience here. I got a key now when people sneak it out. I wouldn't sit every weekend. I mean, he's out of practice. He hasn't had a show that didn't get canceled all year. This is the first time I'd stage in 2022. I legitimately thought you would cancel.

When I got to the four-minute mark and he hadn't come up on a stage. I thought you was just going to book it out the back door and never return. Did you see that he the show the night before was canceled? He's supposed to play at a different black box in Florida and the book of black box. The book of black box. Did you see what people were saying about that? Because have a foul the subreddit? No, I have it. So apparently he was promoting this show and then oh, you know what? I have the clip of him talking about why it got canceled and Let me see if I can find that real quick

Because it's pretty funny. Yeah, this is him. This is him lying about why the gig was canceled. I have my gig tomorrow at the Lake Park Black Box. Anybody in Florida please come down and see other people living Florida. I guess they didn't get the one that all. Great start of a ring John on stage. I was supposed to do last night on four twenty at the bulk of black box but uh... the weed company only wanted open michaels not a professional comic pop out like myself so that's why the owner who i'm very tight with with trying to get me on the bill but they're like we only want open michaels no no pros that's never happened in the history of comedy clubs

they only want open michaels so the reason why everyone knows he's lying is No, no pros. That's never happened in the history of comedy clubs. They only want open-mikers. So the reason why everyone knows he's lying is because they went to the website and there was a grateful dead cover band playing that night. So it was 420. He goes, I was supposed to be booked to do a comedy show. They probably sold no tickets. They went, shit, we gotta do something that's 420.

Yeah. Let's get a grateful dead cover band in here and at least get 30 people to come hang out with us and smoke weed. How pathetic is that? Well, that's the worst excuse I've ever heard. Let's get a gravely-to-cover band in here and at least get 30 people to come hang out with us and smoke weed. Ha ha ha. How pathetic is that? Well, that's the worst excuse I've ever heard. Just to be all open-mikers. And they didn't want someone professional like me.

Yeah, I mean, I was running an open mic at the comedy club last night and Anthony Jesselnik showed up and I was like, no professional holy amateur bullshit. Get the fuck up up up up up up up up up up up up. But I brought 100 people with me. Get the Get out of here. Bup, bup, bup, bup. But I brought 100 people with me. Get the fuck out of here. I've never come back again, you asshole.

Oh, John. And where's he broadcasting from a medical tent? Oh, there's, and now that you bring that up, actually Hell sparks makes fun of him because Hell is also wondering where the fuck job is. So by the way, congratulations. I hear any day now your appeal will get you out of a Belgian P.O.W. prison. Is that what you being held currently?

That's got the engineers house. Oh right. I had no idea that he did his whole entire house like these prison cell and the John Claude Van Dam movie. All right. So what's again, John has to mooch off his friends and stay with Scott the engineer. He can't just get a hotel room. He's not playing gigs or they'll put him up because honestly, I happen to know people who work at the comedy club here at Rochester and when comedians come to town, they put them up. That's how that works. And John can't even get that in his writer. Can I get three course lights?

You get two and we're not community hotel room. Skull. I wanted to was two. That's how I'd negotiate. Sorry, Purple. I've been ignoring you and you have so much to talk about here. Well, I was just going to make a comment. If you hear a lot of outrageous laughing in the clips, that's Scott.

He's one of the 12 in the audience. Okay. That's nice of him. You sure he's not just like coughing from having smoked cigarettes for 68 years. He might be. I'm like laughing, but it's not. What else do you want to play from this, this comedy show? Well, we got a glory days recap from 1546 to 1720 We know

That yeah, I know If that was like that by the way, you know from the Howard Stern show. Hey everybody. It's doing something with that. Yeah, I know. By the way, you know from the Howard Stern Show, hey everybody, it's the work of the Howard Stern Show. I'm just like, the Howard Stern Show. Yeah, I said, I asked a bunch of questions. It's kind of like I asked a dog along with people going

to say hello, darling. Oh my god, they got nothing. Yeah. Good. That was his first example. I asked the dolly lot of people go up to you and ask, Hello, Dolly or say hello, Dolly. Do like, okay. Fred write that one. It's not as bad as. Let's see what's in the news today. You guys didn't like that one? All right, well, let's see what else I do. This is so bad. This is so uncomfortable.

I'm not even there. And that one got one. I can pause it whenever I want. Oh. I need a car. I need a car. I need a car. I need a car.

I need a car. I need a car. I need a car. I need a car. I got it. I got it. I got it. What did you do with the money? I just bring those off. What he did with the money he said. No, no. What did you do with the money? That's the question we're asking. What money? I said the money you bought gave you the signal lessons. I got strapled by the re couldn't really grasp the unity still. You know what I feel bad about when we first did

the Centering John podcast years ago. I started off the show by saying, I like Centering John, and that was the example I gave was the Ringo Star thing. I'm like, look, he had some really funny bits. Here's one of them. If I had known, then 2022, that's the middle of his fucking stand-up act.

I never would have given him credit for it. It's like, oh, he's giving himself credit for it. Okay, that's fine. Then he gets it. He's doing 30 minutes and part of that is saying, remember when I said this on the radio 20 years ago, 40 years ago? And four of it was getting to the stage.

Yeah. Remember when the lowest form of conversation I might want to add. I asked Olgin Simpson if he was signed by a knife. And the winner is there. Will he already have some? Best response ever, God's God, if you remember his best response ever, God was John Rivers and Olf-Brayin. You know, this is how great she was. Basically, you know, she rested at least.

What else could I have been? I said, John, do you think I would be able to skill up? You know, this is how great she was, baby. You know, she rested at least. What else could I be? I say, children, do you think ugly people should give out to have children? She said, now I told the parents that. Ah! Ah! Wow, this is, it's sad.

It is very sad. Because the laughter is nervous laughter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's nervous laughter. Yeah, sad because the laughter is nervous laughter You gonna pull out a gun and kill himself Stuttering John do what stand up now you went and saw Billy Joel recently that he in between songs was he like You know remember I wrote for the longest time. Yeah, If you heard of that one, maybe it sounds a little something. Oh, like this. Yeah.

Or, no, he doesn't even play. He's just like, remember I wrote that. Yeah, right. So it's my luck. Yeah. What the fuck is he doing? Oh, he really amps up the awkward crowd forced interactions. And one of the clips starts at 2016 to 22 17 he forces the crowd to yell

you won't continue until they make it seem like those are more people here Like I said, I got a war between dad and I think it's my dad and a son-in-law. That's what it looks like. That's what we got two people on one. See, this is like a big way to reset where we're going to get our own engine for powerful life-twenty minutes of this. Can I get Bloney Sam just for everyone in the room please we need some energy We're watching us on YouTube right now He's gonna make people say how cheap was he? Is that what he's doing?

I think so, yeah, you ready for it, Ed? They're not the 15 people that are there and not Jews from the cat skills, okay? They don't know what to do. They're not doing your show for you. So, Jesus, what we all have come together? They do say, how cheap was it? The right side of the room's got to do no have to miss. When she sits around the house, And you say

When she sits around the house stop you heard this one guys This went from bed to worse Why did you get the volume? Out of the shit! What the fuck? This went from bed to worse. Ha ha ha ha! Purple, this is a good clip. Yeah! 5-0 is so cheap! Out of the blood, hey! He was so cheap this like here,

and trust farmers are gonna get another try. Oh my god, I've heard that too, I was fucking mad. Alright. I didn't even say I couldn't hear it. His dad was so cheap, his trust fund was, you'll get nothing trust me. Oh, right. That's from the book.

It's in the book. It's from his podcast. Yeah, he's listed all the time. She's a scryce. This guy doesn't need more media outlets. Alright. He's too much, he's oversaturated. Ready, audience?

Knock knock. Orange and glad I didn't see banana. Holy shit. Purple is there. You yelling at the very end there? Was that Scott the engineer next to you? I had to yell because I thought a little bit bad. But he wouldn't end the show. I know how I felt bad doing.

I'm G.WaSty. All right. I thought I'd get this shit over with, man. I thought I'd get over with. I'm not getting off stage until you say it. Purple, what was the audience like there? Were they Howard Stern fans? Were they dabblers? Like, what did you see when you looked around?

They had to be Howard Stern fans. No one besides me was under the age of 50. Okay, yeah, that makes sense. And I stuck out like a fourth thumb. I'm surprised he didn't call up on me. Well, yeah, your purple. And his sort of sore thumb looks like. Anything else you want to play from his stand up? Just one more. The last infamous squeegee joke. up just one more the last infamous squeegee joke. 31, 48 to 34 20 42.

That should have got to the pause break. Yeah. I want to. Yeah. Thank God. Use your all the cars start up in the car. Yeah. All three cars. Yeah. Yeah, you can agree that I'd say crap, but it's not a school life cap. I don't have a roof. A roof. A roof. Okay.

Yeah. Oh my God. How did he not have a joke for that? How did he not have a joke for when it's an empty comedy club? Yeah. You should have a joke ready to go for that. How does he not have a joke for when it's an empty comedy club? You should Why do I have to, I'll hang out in the bar, we'll have to be if you want to take pictures or talk, you hang out in the sky. He's a great guy.

Don't fall in the skin. What? Don't fall in the skin. Oh my god. Okay, well, maybe you start one and then you'll find the next one. I'll see you next. For people who aren't a Howard Stern fan, Scott, the engineer, was never allowed in the studio. He's not a good ad-libber.

John and Scott, neither of them, should have a microphone in front of their faces. Right. He was like a black hole. Yeah, they goofed on him how unfunny he was. He was. He was. That was like his bit. And now John's putting him on the fucking spot during his comedy show.

John, abort, abort, what are you doing? Okay. Scott, when you're cold, do you prepare? You want to prepare? Yes. Trey Peacock would tell you she'd get a kru sock for your ejaculate. What would I clean next?

Nothing. Okay, I'm in a circle, when you journal. Do you prepare? No. See? A lot of calories. Sir, you prepare? Can someone answer this question?

Do I keep please? My punchline works. Officially back to not feeling bad. No, shit. He's so bad at this. All right, how about you, sir? All right, ma'am, how about you, a hugeer guy? Is anyone here?

It sucks out loud. Does anyone here grab a box of clean-ups? Anyone? A lot of guys use the clean-ups. Right? Now, here's the thing, I'm gonna give you an invasion, a moment of what I do. Clean-ups does not work.

You try and wipe that shit off with pre-mixed It's like trying to blow away more paint wipes with a fucking cute pick Yeah, cuz he's been saving that batch Oh, yeah, that's right So the random random and nothing is picked up This is what I I'll be alone in bed And I'm just in my underwear. And I'll marry spontaneism as all of us guys know is another word for ladies.

And you know, they're right in just in my underwear and I start jerking on. Hold on and keep start jerking on. Hold on and keep the black guys here. I start jerking on. And then I sploosh all over my stomach. So then what I do is I take my undo. Why is this taking so long? Yes, you know what it is.

This is the latest bit, and he's built it up into a three-minute setup for this payoff. So let me give you a little bit of a visual what he's doing. As soon as he said my stomach, he pulled up his polo shirt all the way up to his stomach and then he yanked his underwear all the way up to his chest. I've seen this bet. Yeah. And it's... I was like looking at Madusa's head. I was petrified just staring at this monster.

Just so you know, just so you know purple. This is how Carrotop started. Okay. He was like, all right, what can I do? It's got my underpants and my shirt. And then I bet he's like, what if I bring a whole trunk full of props? Yeah. So he's giving himself a melvin on stage. Yeah. This. And I'm squeegee. So he's giving himself a melvin and stage. Yeah. This.

And I squeegee. The house. Everything down. Right into my fuse. To where I was standing, my fuse tried to find out Kate's head. Good night everybody. I want a fucking clothes drive safe. What a closer.

You always want to add to thunderous applause. Well done, Chad. With a dated reference to Don King. Can we go back to talking about scooping shit out of the toilet? Yes, that was so gross just now. Although women, which by the way, they look like they were dragged there. Yes, they were all the women in that audience were horrified at what he was doing on stage. And by the end, I could see one gagging.

Yeah. That's hilarious. Well, purple, I will tell you everyone in the discord is saying that you are now king of the dabblers. Well done sir, we've been waiting for this to happen for someone to show up. So amazing. And record a rucket English. Come. This is worse than I thought it was going to be and I've seen a set before. It's pretty much what I thought it would be so awkward. I thought it would be well rehearsed and at least get through his thing instead.

It's like, what about you sir? Do you use Kleenex? No, okay. How about you over there? The server. When you're done serving those drinks, can come over here, I got a question about Kleenex. Jesus, just get to the point. Just get to the point. Okay. Purple, thank you so much for doing that.

Anything else you want to add from your experience? Did you talk to me? Did you get an autograph or anything? I got an autograph. Obviously not autographed in my direct name. I will probably be giving it out at the live show because I will be going. Yes!

Yay! We'll see Purple and Nashville. And I got a photograph of him and Scott the engineer. And he put his hand on my shoulder. And it may or may not have left the mark So look for the guy with a yellow shoulder to be purple When you're in that swell. I should have mentioned this at the beginning of the show When I got there about 30 minutes early just so I could see all the people trickle in and two people two teenagers

Just came in randomly. Yeah, and the lady at the front desk tried to hard sell them stuttering John tickets. And they legit said to her, who? Yep. Sounds about right. Like we're grateful dead concert. Oh, that was the other black box. Fuck. It was so bad.

And ever as soon as a set ended within two minutes, everyone except me stuttering John and Scott the engineer, without a theater. Of course. So just you guys got to hang out and shoot the shit afterwards. Shoot, shoot the shit. He seemed very bitter about everyone being gone. I would imagine.

Purple, that's fine reporting, sir. And our field reporter, purple. The best fieldabler says goodbye. Next week, we'll be talking to Purple from Ukraine to get the latest time. Everything happening there. Yeah, gosh, smear now. I've got more zone to another. All right, Purple. Thanks, buddy. Great work, my friend.

Thanks. See you. Great show, Carl. Hey, thanks, man. That's pretty good. Pretty good. Wow, that was fun. All right. So I got a bunch more segments from Centering John show on Thursday. He's at Scott's house. He had his gig cancelled, but he's got Hell's Parks on for the entire time. And he starts up the show by talking about he took an airplane into Miami. And there's a guy next to him on the airplane.

They didn't care for it first, but then he started talking to him. And this guy is in the marijuana trade and this peak John's interest. He's got some advice for us here. Anyway, he works for a lead firm. He's out in Florida for $4.20. He tells me to buy a stock

That he thinks is gonna go up because they're gonna get bought out Mary Med M-A-R-I-M-E-D. Don't sue me. He said You know do your own do your own research So I went and bought some joy high and GG by the sea So Chad goes think I told me to do some research and I didn't, I just bought it immediately because I like weed, so of course, that's gonna make money and then he tells people on his show about this, he's not no research, he doesn't know anything about it,

he's random, he talked to this guy. The guy said, keep it a secret, too. Yeah. Well, the guy must have really taken a shining to John because John offered him a ride to his hotel room. But I ended up offering a guy to drive him to his hotel, Kimberly Glanz from Kent, Ohio. And then he went to get his bag.

I go just meet me at the car rental. And then he never showed up, so hopefully I'll hook up with him when we're back in LA. He's really nice to do it. The guy goes to them in between baggage claim and the rental car place. I guess I'm shit. I don't like it away from it. Yeah, just gonna go shit the bathroom. I just got my period. I'll be right back.

Thanks for the thanks for the ride. I saw him hanging off landing gear of a departing flight. Get away from me. The guy was out of there like it was Afghanistan. 2021. Move, move. All right, so of course John is beginning of the show. The first over 20 minutes, he's reading names.

And thankfully somebody finally fucking calls him out for this. Catherine de Filippo, Roderick Berry, Kelly Shaffron. And I should mention, soerick Berry, Kelly Shaffron. And I should mention, so John Decker, who gave him the Super Chat here for $199, says I'm looking to hire you. And right before this, John's like, oh, yes, sweet.

All right, DM me. And let's talk about it. He doesn't say what it's for, or anything, it could be house-pigging. And he's like, all right, yeah. This isn't a Super Chat, it's a rate quote. A dollar $199. God, I did.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. John Decker, why is how you read all this the names. Yeah, yeah, it is exciting. Police of Howard, I like to do that in the beginning because I appreciate the people that appreciate me, dummy. Um, I mean, do I have to explain why that's fucking hilarious? This guy just offered to give him money

and then he goes, oh, so what are you just gonna read? A list of names, he's like, oh yeah, you idiot. That's how people do shows. It's not like there's a most of these shows, John. It's actually really boring for everyone. So then John starts talking about his DC trip and it turns out it might suck.

Go figure, John, finally admits it might suck. Also go to the Venmo, which is right up here and then hold the phone up because as you know, my DC trip is happening. And I said to somebody, I think it was Joni, someone he was like, because I said, if I get the interviews, they're going to go up first on on Patreon or on to YouTube for only the members. And she said, you know, it better not be if, well, the truth of matter is even when I was doing the Stuttering John interviews on Howard Stone,

there was never a guarantee that I would get anything now I am tenacious, that's for damn sure, but there's never a guarantee. So I'll do my best. Believe me, I'll lie, I'll do anything I can to try and get the interview. I used to say I was from Kaborki in television where every interview was a suicide. Tell that one on stage. But yeah, so I used to wear ABC sweatshirts to make an appear of that one from ABC. Should be ABD. I can both show it to the best.

Always be dappling. I love it, Jon's already kinda hedging his bad areas. Now just so you guys know, just because we, I doubt he has a film crew yet. He hasn't talked about it. Just because we have a film crew, we're gonna be in DC after all the politicians are, I might come back with nothing.

Throw it out there as a possibility. There is a chance I come back with absolutely nothing to show for this. It's gonna be John with a selfie stick getting shot by a rubber bullet. You think a selfie stick's in this budget? I do like the idea of getting shot by a rubber bullet. You think a selfie sticks in this budget? I do like that. I'm getting shot by a rubber bullet.

Oh, that's funny. All right. I'm just going to bounce around here because there's a lot to talk about. Like, so hails on the show. And I want you to pay close attention to John's eyeballs. John's not paying attention to hell. John has one job to do, one job, pay attention to your guest and have a conversation with said guest. And John is not paying attention. I came in one week and everybody was like, oh,

like, like, what happened? And he goes, well, Gilbert was here last week and he wasn't having a great time. Something else was like, he was just, it just wasn't flying the set. He was kind of bombing or whatever, but he had to be on stage for 45 minutes. So he just laid down on the floor and talked about the room just like, wait, wait, wait, I'm just, why did he wait? I don't, he was just bombing because he didn't, the crowds weren't having him. Whatever, it didn't matter But he had to be on stage for 45 minutes to get paid he had to be funny. Nobody can put that in a contract

So you and then he oversells that yeah, you see that you that transformation from wait What are you talking about? He's like what I Gilbert? You don't say So this is John talking about how he takes care of Scott, the engineer, because people were giving him grief for not getting a hotel room like most comedians would and staying with Scott. So he's got to be able to play that some idiot off. I post a picture of Scott and I, oh, can you stop taking a baby and just cut?

I'm like, I texted the guy go, I paid. I paid for that, you dumb, schmuck. And I got Scottie a gig to a paying gig. You dumb. Why don't you put air quotes around paying James? You know what those payings mean? What's he gonna do? Give him a blowjob? What do you do?

Pull the railing for Applebee's coupons? What is it? Quote, unquote. You try to get a free appetizer for a night's worth of work. It seems like he's trying to be really quiet too. Oh, he's got sleeping dirty thus. Oh, that's right. John, if you get those fucking dogs,

better get in here to the fuck outta here. Yeah, I was sleeping right next to him. That's actually some foresh if you get those fucking dogs, better get in here to the fuck out of here. Yeah, I'll leave him right next to him. That's actually some foreshadowing for my next clip, producer Kress. Paul, I'm bravely, I take care of my friends. Okay. You know, Scott, let's me stay here tonight. I take him off. I take him out the demo and I get him a gig that's paying him more than you know

Then any any two nights at a very high-class hotel in Florida trust me. Right. My mind Okay So John's all proud of himself that he's gotten Scott the edgidier of some type of paying gig That's paying him all this kind of money and that's what justifies him. Staying with him. So again, he can't get himself. Right, for some reason, Scott the engineer has no idea how to get himself gigs,

but John can help him out. Yeah, and so let's do the math. 15 people were at your show, that's $300. Mm-hmm. How much does it cost to stay in a hotel? Probably about that. Her cup of nights. Yeah.

It's like, it's so ridiculous. Well, he also worried about taking him off for dinner. Yeah. So, before, and he posted this on Instagram, there's a photo of John and Scott at the shitty restaurant as somebody wrote, Wang John fingernails. The trigger you laugh for the art. It's such a funny, funny thing to say. All right, so then hell's out of the show with them. And Scott wakes up.

And Scott gets up. And John's all excited to show Haley as another friend in life. So what, watch this. I just, I hope that Scott just like sits up behind him. Like Frankenstein. I want, I want you to watch for how awkward John is trying to like give Scott a hog or show that their friends to hell.

And then it gets even funnier at the very end of this clip. Only Stuttering John would do this during the show. That's great. Oh, here he is. Hey, how's he hiding? And he's got to say hi to-hide. This is how sparks. How? Yeah. Oh, hell.

Hey. How are you? Looking good, Scott. I've seen my dog lose you. I know. I'm I'm I'm beloved by animals with four and two legs. I'll see you with John. Thank you for having him as a guest,

and we apologize for his behavior ahead of time. Exactly. Oh, it's a puppy. Look at that puppy. Look at the puppy. What's happening, puppy? I love this dog. It's a cute dog.

What's it? What's their name? Winston. Winston. Oh, OK, sure. Absolutely. After the witch trial that I'm sure he is. I think the back of the theme going on here.

He's a witch spotter. Oh, I got you that. Hey, believe me. I got the money for you. Oh, that's not, what are you doing? What is this business going on? Anyways, everybody says hi to the dog. Yeah.

There it is. No, I got, I got Scott and Gig. That's kind of guy in hell. All right. Look at that. A paying gig. Get out of here. With a broom and everything.

I'm a good friend, hell. That's kind of guy in. Right, you're a munch. That's why you sleep on the porch. I'm a munch. Yeah. Fucking hell. I was just like, what do you do here?

I got you that money by the way. It's like, I got care. I got you the way. Yeah. Fuckin' Hell is just like, what are you doing? Yeah. I got you that money by the way, he's like, I got you the money. Scott, Hell just see what a great guy I'm just now. Yeah, you're the best. Hell's politics are insufferable, but he's such a breath of fresh air. Yeah, I agree.

When you put him next to Stuttering John, you're like, Hell's Marks is brilliant. Compared to John. Right. Yes, correct. This is John doing his daily affirmations in the mirror. You old, wrinkly, prune-looking scum thing. All right, and now this is John,

being a prick to one of his fans. Now, I don't know, with the number of fans that John has, they should be like pissing them off or being a douchebag to them. Seems like a bad idea, but just look, look at the way he talks down to this person. Shorty one. Wonder why John was on Tuesday.

Hope I was well, I did warn everyone, Shorty. One I was on a plane at 6 a.m. Flying to Miami, which I landed at 2 p.m. Eastern time. So I couldn't do a show. Thank you so much. So long, just had to figure out the fucking time zones. See guys, this is the way it works. There's Eastern time and there's a Western time.

It's got it all figured out. Bloody da. What an asshole. All right. So now he's asking for stars on Facebook, which they make you read this script because Alpí does it too, and it sounds so pathetic. But there's a reason why John needs you to give him stars on Facebook, obviously.

And for all you people on Facebook, during this broadcast, you can support my page by sending stars, a digital gift that helps me earn money. And I am going to have to get a hotel room in DC, which will go for like 309. Well, yeah, it's a business expanse, John. You gotta stay at the place where you're doing business and three in a night.

It's kind of sad that he brings that up, isn't it? I'm not going to be able to buy Scott a four piece at KFC and sleep in his driveway. Seriously, why would you bring that up as if that's a lot of money? It can't be a lot of money, even to, I guess it is. Yeah, on the heels of saying that I got your money. Right, I know he's so proud of himself

and then immediately give me stars on Facebook, which I've done the research on it's a dollar a star. How many stars is he gonna get from the seven people watching on Facebook? They can afford this hotel. I know you didn't believe that I would get it, but I got it. So this is, oh, and that's interesting too,

because if you remember, he was gonna say at Glend Kershner's place. I guess that fell through. Remember when he had Glennon? He's like, oh, you live in DC? Can I crash at your place? Cause again, sure, I'm sure there was a text. I mean, oh, by the way,

I forgot, I'm family in town. Wait, what week are you coming here? Oh, yeah, all of those weeks. I'm busy, actually. Where are they gonna sleep? Yeah. I can sleep on the porch. I can sleep on a sofa.

It's fine. This is John recounting a time when he met Don Rickles at the tonight show, just to show you how delusional this retard is. You guys know Don Rickles, right? You know what he's known for? Busting balls. John's not sure if Don was being truthful with him or not. Just don'tstop on fire. Then he comes in and he's getting,

he's sitting in the makeup chair. I come up to him and say, hey, down. You know, I'm a big fan. He goes, hey, listen to me. You're funny and then Jay. You're funny and then Kevin. You should do more talk. And Jay wants to keep you down.

Don't let him do that. I watch every single night. Just hear what I'm saying. You got to talk more. You hear what I'm saying, Paul? I go, uh, I'm Mr. Rickles. My name is John. And he goes, what happened?

You just got to talk more. I don't, still this day. Don't know if he was messing with me. And I'll never know. You don't? Yeah. You think he was having a heart to heart with you, John? Like, let me give you some career,

I know I'm in bus everyone's balls here, but let me give you some career advice real quick. What a fucking more of the joke was Paul! Yeah. That was the joke! I think you're great, you got a lot of talent, kid. All right, Paul, thanks, good to see you. Oh, I'm John.

That's the joke. He didn't get it then, he still doesn't get it now. And he's talking about, like, that Rickles game is a really good career advice on. Holy shit. I know this goes without explaining, I'm just still dumbfounded. It says, we just witnessed that.

John wants to believe that he's funnier than Jay Leno. Yes, if someone wants to believe something hard enough, you could convince them that it's true. Mm-hmm. Ha, ha, ha. You know. You know. You know. I got, I got a couple more here because John tells us by

Agra joke. Now this joke is also on a t-shirt that he sells. And I know that because Vinnie had to buy one of these t-shirts for a consequence. It's up in the other studio at the creep off. So it's a curtain. It's a curtain. Fucking John can't stop himself from telling the same jokes over and over again in his book at his live show on his podcast in his

merch store everywhere with these jokes. Lacey Carter, we don't need anyone to test her on the stars from all we need is my biagra. Come on Support the inventor of biagra. I hear he, a biagra. Here, he lived a very hard life. Nancy Cox. You can tell I love doing this, don't you? Jamie Steele.

You got to love what you're doing. Else, why do it? Some people work jobs, they can pay their Wi-Fi bills. Some people work jobs, they don't even enjoy. So they can pay Wi-Fi. So they can stay in a hotel, not in somebody's screen dog house. Have a working oven on Thanksgiving.

Yeah, there's a lot of reasons why you might want to work a job that actually pays you money. And he's so proud of himself after that. New sneakers. That's such a bad joke. He lived a hard life. The guy who invented Viagra. And he's so proud of himself. I was like, yeah, he's like, I see how much fun I'm having of myself after that. New sneakers. That's such a bad joke. He lived a hard life. The guy who invented my egg. And he's so proud of himself.

I was like, yeah, he's the guy's see how much fun I'm having on there. No one else is. I'm glad you're having fun, John. It's probably not even his. It's like when, probably not. If you have like a friend that's telling an antichdote that you've heard three or four times,

or like your wife or your husband or somebody that's just like, oh, I told this at work, and now I'm telling you, and now I'm telling this guy that didn't hear it, but your husband is standing there, listening to it again. And you're like, I kind of fucking hear this joke again about the guy that invented a Viagra. And a hard life.

Yeah, did you hear that, Chris? The guy who invented Viagra, good to hard life. I have fun, guys. You hard life. I have fun guys. We have fun here. After you've heard it twice, you're like, oh my god, this again. Have you heard it once? Yeah.

That's something good, Joe. Why is it a T-shirt? Say something funny that hasn't been heard a million times already, everybody's heard it. This is interesting because somebody asked hell, if he's ever been on Joe Rogan, and hell says, yeah, I did do Joe Rogan a while back. He goes, the thing that I'm having come with

Joe Rogan is Joe's into drugs, and I don't do drugs. Hell sparks a straight edge guy, and this was kind of interesting. But it's like a shortcut to those ideas, or it creates a certain biochemistry where you're more apt to lean one direction than you might have naturally. Do you know who would agree with you? All three of my kids, they don't drink smoke or do anything.

Gee, I wonder why your kids have seen that alcohol was bad. I wonder how that came out. Ever since they saw their father and their billboard. Yeah. They were raised by cautionary tale. You know, it's not like Joe Rogan forces drugs down your throat if you do this show. You want to come out of the show and do acid for three weeks?

Yes, sure. Why not? You should. I have, um, something that I want to start doing is still doing John flashback because people in the sub-writer posting like things from last year or two years ago. And this is such a great video clip. It's been Hockey puck told John

that all those trolls who are calling his phone and masking it as someone else, Hockey puck told him, hey, if you pick up on them, they have to pay for every minute. That's crazy. That's the way they're talking about that. And John thought he was getting over on these people

because he believed it for some reason. So he left his phone on the phone, just keeps ringing and John thinks that he's getting over on the trulls. This is so funny. Oh good, good, good. I was instructed how to deal with the trulls that call me, love it.

There we go. Let it do it like this here. Yeah, see now, yeah. There we go. There we go. Yeah, just answer the phone when they call now. They gotta pay for every minute. Okay.

Thank you, my old moderator, for giving me that little piece of intel. Just answer it. Answer it. They got to pay now. They can't hang up. And if I don't hang up, they're paying for every minute. Love it. Thank you Sean for that intel. He's so fucking proud of himself, too. Oh, he is so stupid. Oh, good. Do it again, do it again. Do it again, love it. There you go. There you go. I'll just keep answering, bro.

You keep paying. You keep paying. I'll keep answering. Don't worry about it. Love it. It's not ruining or derailing my show it anyway. I love it. I'll just say, hey, hello, how are you?

How are you doing? Thank you. John, just say, hey, hello, how are you? How are you doing? Thank you. John, if you sue someone more twice, they have to pay twice as much. So just do the same, Nick, you be when they call you to do the same. Just answer it. They have to pay for it. Oh, now they're calling for a different number. See, this little service that they do, it cost bucks. It costs money. Bucks. Every time I answer, it cost to me more.

You make it better. I didn't notice. Sean had to tell me and I appreciated it. So Nick, you do the same thing. Mom, do the same thing. You pick it, answer it and just put the phone down. Who cares? I don't mind the calls. I don't care if my phone rings

I Entertain it. I just got to answer it He wants to spend your money I don't really care. He's so fucking stupid. Fuck it idiot. He doesn't look like Donkey Kong Come on, y'all got a laugh. Yes That would call me. And if I answer, then they got to pay more. I love it. So so Nikki B when you get the call, mom, when you get the calls, poor mom, just answer it and then put the phone down. Let them pay for it.

to call. Just answer it and then put the phone down. Let them pay for it. Has the great Reggie Jackson ones. They don't boo nobody's. Right now I've received about 20 call. Each call according to my former moderator. Cost them I think 10 bucks. Okay, they just spent about $400 to call me. Since they're trying to disrupt the show. But they're not. They're in the same house. Yeah. Because I know that they're spending their money on me

and there's no show. And there's no last time anybody paid money to make a phone call with me. It doesn't exist. It's an infatuation. They have an obsession with me. What about when he calls his mom? Mom, it's me.

She puts the phone down. What am I trying to do? I'm trying to bring in the great post and one of my favorite guests is Ev Shellev. I say one by time, I'll be a pick with pub every day. In what the hell? Every day. Why don't you come to my face and troll me?

Come on, I dare you. Come right in my face like Robin Conrad used to day you to knock the battery off the shoulder. You cover my face and I'll use my underpants to squeeze in. Don't think about doing anything that's violent because it'll be about 20 or 30 people at the bubble jump on your ass like that. That's what, you're tough. But good luck with that. I doubt you'll come. See, because you can cowards. I'll show you. A little alluded to or I'll get a standing ovation from everyone else. Yeah.

Thank you for beating down that asshole. Oh my gosh. So I like going back down memory lane because there's so much that's happened in the last two, three, four years that keep posting those old videos that we forget about. We said, we forgot how stupid he has always been, sometimes. Andy, what have we done today?

We haven't done. I'll throw out people off with us now. We've done it all. The almost adulting podcast with Violet Benson. We talked about the Jacked Up Review show, Stuttering John, had a stand-up show. The purple went to He's in Florida, getting gigs for Scott the Engineer.

So you know what that means. It's time for everyone's favorite part of the show. The team's next week's next week's Jacket League season. The's time for everyone's favorite part of the show. The T-Tex! The T-Tex! The T-Tex! The T-Tex! This is the part of the show we play a clip from the podcast that we'll be reviewing next week's W-A-T-P and it sounds a little something like this.

Hey Jill, we'll be there in a second. I've talked to my friend here. It's a little bird. Number here. That's a little bird. Number one, it's a tiny bird. Come on. It's scary. You can't, you can't. Ha, ha, ha, I'm young. I'm strong.

Oh, come on, here's a deal. Here's a little bird. Here's a little bird. Jill, I'll be there in a second. Come on. Oh, he flew off. What should I do. Come on. Oh, he flew off. What should I do with the pudding? Oh, he flew away.

That was him. All right, there you go. All right, this is a show called Fly on the Wall. Very popular podcast. And this is, is it fly on the wall or fly on the all? Did I typo that on myself? That doesn't make sense, Rick. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Let me fly on the wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade from Ryan Rebalken. Oh my God, it sounds like Hollywood Handbook. Yeah, no, this is Dana Carvey doing his Joe Biden impression and David Spade playing a lot. Jesus. They did an episode with Sarah Silverman, which I'm planning on checking out. Oh, so they have a lot of fun guests out there.

So that's it. We'll be checking in on next week on W ATP. And we are in the, we're heading towards the live show May 14th of ATP live.com. Get your tickets. It's going to be a great event. There's only 10 left. No nine. Now wait now 24. Get them while you can. For as low as $20 a seat you can go and come and check us out. We're gonna have a party. It's gonna be a blast in Nashville and anything that you want to promote my friend. Yeah, check out my new YouTube channel where I teach women to find their G-spot.

Okay, does that have a name? Trucker handbook. Trucking down the birth canal. Gee, I don't know what I'm doing down here. So it's good, well thanks for coming out, Andy. Yeah. Potato news. From Reddit.

Oh, shit. This is reminding me, I've left out a whole bunch of shit that I was gonna get to Cuz he said potato news Man, I thought you were deliberately leaving it out because of potato news. I tell man. I don't have time for this Do you have time for this right now? Sure all right, so Cardiff did a video on that. Oh God, I'm not going to be doing it. I changed my mind.

Oh yeah. No, that's worth it. It's worth it. Okay. Fucking brilliant. This is so brilliant. Yeah. God dammit.

Uh. All right. All right. It was all worth it. All right, check this out. So people who aren't watching this, Cardiff is French fries and the French fries are watching the potato. Good morning, everyone.

And welcome to after Palm Swipes After, an after show of the after show of mom swipes left. Let's get started and see what our pal, Palm De Terre is talking about this week. Mostly back to our regular lease scheduled program. Oh, good news. I have to get to the top of the page. You've time traveled back to Palm Swipes after.

Scratch and sniff of the latest episode of Palm Swipes laughed. The podcast with two-minute-lage women who don't care if you want to fuck them. Ha! This is episode 35. Valade, my cell episode 174. I'm your host. Good episode.

Thank you. First off, if it was good to have the ladies back informed, just talking their own shit. I would agree. Yes. Talking their own shit. I would agree. Yeah, raspy sexy cold voice was working for her. Yes I was apparently need to get to work on a venn diagram of skank whore and slut Might even throw in Jezbel or Harlett and femme fatale or Femi Fittali As you would probably say no no hold on palm

tally as you would probably say. No, no, hold on, pal. Please don't add extra categories to the discussion that the ladies had. Let's keep focused and on track. All right, so that later on, they talk about the junk falling out. That's terrible. Really, but it was terrible. A does it happen to my grandma running the family twice. Two probably not the old pro labs puts he spell like I won't answer that. That's all I've got

for the regular show. Then there's the cell phone Titus of the Tes testicles in the room. They need to? Are these podcasts? Hey. Thank you guys for taking the time to conspend to a tuber. You're welcome.

No, I am not Carol's husband. No. Or a white knight, because they don't need one. You're a potato. Isn't evidently clear. a white knight because they don't need one. Your potatoes. Evidently clear. By now, the last thing is women. I know people don't like Garnet, but this is actually really fun. This is a perfect rebuttal.

I can't do a better job. It's why I've just let a Garnet do it. He is a savior. That is the last thing he leaves. So I guess that leaves super fan, which apparently is a Saturday and a Cuck. Yep, a little bit. Say, whatever, have what happened to Cuck's that it's so bad.

All right, so I would answer that, but I actually kind of does a pretty good job of responding to that question. I wouldn't think that's what. If you're a cock and that's what gets you off, hey, at least. Well, let me pause right there, Pomp. What happened to a cock that's so bad is somebody has sex with their woman in front of them. Let's continue. You're getting off, so good on you.

Very importantly, I wanted to say. Let me add to that too, is they usually have sex with them better than you. It's a good point. Say that. It's pretty nice of good points. Tatos are not silly, and they don't have silly voices. Yes. We're buried alive.

We're moving with our thoughts day in, day night. Spit it out. Yeah, you're gonna pick on that too. Don't give a shit. Cause somebody's gonna come and cut me into pieces and plant me next to myself until I clone. Flagging French rice. Look what happens when you get cut into pieces as a potato.

I'm glad you feel good. Thank you. Detrash a sad sack potato. But I'm afraid I'm not taking it personally there. But for you. And you can also be proud of the fact that now I have a few views. Yeah, thanks to you. Thank you to your troll link, you beater.

Oh, they have a lot of trolls. Trust me. Also, thank you. No! And we're thinking that I spend all my computer time at the asylum. They call it screen time. Doing this, but I get 35 minutes a week and I only use about five on. Whoa, whoa, whoa, 35 minutes a week. All right.

That's a lot more than me. We should chat. Mondays for Palm. Then if I suck the orderly's dead, he gets me an extra 45 seconds. That's how long it takes. Oh, I understand now. Also, I want to give you credit where it's due for a few of your jokes. Oh, please.

What's here? Played a fries with vocal fries. Kind of funny as what you're in cell come back about that you just don't want to fuck your way. Neither do I. You might do it anyway. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, my his wife. I'm sorry, my wife. This video over. Yeah. Alright. Well, well done, Cardiff, I have your response. Yeah, I bust Cardiff's boss, but that was good. I can't do a better job.

I'm not front-frizzed. Honestly, if you do. Well, the real thing that you have to understand is that this is an audio format right now, you have to see what the fucking potato video is. When I saw it, I fucking lost it. It's up on YouTube. Good or YouTube channel?

Who are these podcasts? It's worth checking out. If you're listening to this going, this is just boring. It's because you're not seeing. You have to see what this potato looks like. It's very fun. And the french fries card if is pretty fucking hilarious too.

And also card if did send in a Carl Song parody, because apparently Vinny declared there's a Carl Song parody. Cat, that's the supposed to sound a bit Vinny, but uh... This is... The Man Who Killed Stuck Joe. From Cardiff Electric, I'm just gonna talk it up to the poster of W-A-T-P. He lives in Rochester. Used a dabble in marketing.

He gave that all up. Focused on podcasting. He said it's all in fun. Did it know what he had done till John died on the floor? Who is light and lipid tour? Goatee, Clubfoot, he's the biggest John Trone, go Tokes, that's Carl, he's the man who killed St. Joe. All right, very well done.

Good stuff. Card of good stuff. And there were other songs that came in, I should say, there's this one that came in from Jody B, from Poe Boyz podcast and Rubber Nuckers, with our friend John the Fleet Fanatic and Man Brain, and this is the W-A-T Potato. So this is not a sorry parody for me, this is a sorry parody for the potato. That pic of lane. There's a lot going on here. This has a long inch of me.

20 seconds in and still got a guy area. To Carl and Crows, Rev you show W-A-T-P The old girls took it well Then came this one dumb himself And he said it was a bendet Oh, at the fact that the boys didn't care Careling, Jin, we're honest How about the girl's gun A potato guy, may have to be

A potato guy, may have to be Oh, put it over. Mastee. Oh, no, it happened at J.O.D.B. He sang that slap or rune song like really wow. And these notes are all over the place. The chorus was a potato got mashed today. Yeah, what? Apparently.

I'm gonna be honest, I didn't know what he was saying. I didn't know either of you had to send that to me. And then this is another, I guess, potato parody. This comes in from my sister-in-law, Chrissy. Oh, great. It's four minutes long, huh? Let's try to play this. Come on.

Come on. No, I just tap out. What are you ready to tap out, please? By really selling this, I'm going to talk it out. I'm going to talk it out. I'm going to talk it out. My night chain, Janne Carole, I'm not cute. You're a cock, a super fan Come and join

Oh, take a fan What's going on? You all We need a GON Yeah You are We need a gone All right, you're a crazy person. I get some right or something people check it out I don't know what's going on there. I just think it's funny because she listens to everything That is related to the podcast and we'd say all the time I mean taken from a guy that did a fucking Phil Collins thing that was way too long. Yes

just like four minutes. Come on. And the mix. The mix. The mix. I want to know if Vick is here. I think she is. Vick? Hello.

Hello. Victoria. I want to know, Vick, are you ready to catch a dabbler? Absolutely, I am. It's time for everyone's favorite game show. To catch a dabbler. Are you ready to play? To catch a dabbler.

He's probably the bany, if you should pick up. That's my last name to be You have reached the voicemail message What yeah, I'm all right. I potted down the number. I'll call All right, hey Gary and Stuttering John Just wanted to talk to you on my podcast. I like to Honestly I just wanted to talk to you on my podcast. I'd like to honestly... To catch a damn look. What did John say next?

Here are your choices. Number one. I'd like to apologize for all the gags over the years. I'll be in New York next week. Let's grab a beer. B, I'd like to see if you guys want to have me on to promote my book. 3, I was hoping to borrow a couple of bucks. Next, I'm having a party and I just wanted to ask if you left any shrimp in the ocean for us. Five, I wanted to reach out as I'm sure

you heard about my call to Trump. Maybe I could come on the show to talk about it. To catch a dabbler. I'm going to say it's the trump call Andy. What do you say shrimp shrimp? Shrimp. Alright, I think that's too funny, but God Beck, what do you got? It's a shrimp one. Oh, everyone says shrimp. Alright He's probably the baby. You should pick up. That's my last name to be You have reached the voicemail What? Yeah, I'm gonna put it, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I honestly, I'd like to see if you guys want to have me on to promote my book. You guys are gonna love it. Comes out October 16th.

It's called easy for you to say. Alright, give me a call and you get a chance. You know my number. Alright, I'll talk to you. hilarious. Be sure to come back next week to find out if you are man enough to catch. Fuck it. Fuck it.

I kept waiting for like a teeth thing because I was like he's gonna tell a joke Yeah, he's told a hundred times right and the shrimp thing was the closest thing exactly a joke I told a hundred times But what you got us don't get the pressure now after you lose Andy Let me tell you the secret to my unsuccessful It's not impressive You lose, sir. Good day, sir. I'll see myself out. All right. Um, that came out for a second. We're gonna do some reviews. Uh, but please Sleep while I reply to his stories.

Hmm. Okay. Great show. Good job everybody. Great job everyone. the saddest, cringiest, most pathetic thing I've ever seen, and I've seen beer on the balcony. Outside command asks, and what point is the potato found to have either committed a mass shooting or polapod cast hitman? GG Gilman, potato guy does indeed remind me of banana docks, only more low-key and sane, instead of constantly making noises. Get Elise Thumb. Was that potato retarded? Seriously. Not Vinnie.

I mean, the actual spark. Turbo-7049. This is the type of whack job that would actually stock and kill someone. Carl should keep it up. Arlycus. The potato is genius. Listening to him cry made my Easter.

But deeply unprincipled makes an interesting point. Normally I would agree, but there is something too ripe about this peach. He's not going to get any stranger. There is no ego behind this to derive. It would be like poking a dying puppy. And regarding cartoflectrics and intriguing response to said, you, tuber? Fix it 403 suggests, Carl should bring back the hamburger filter to review this. Brad Logan agrees.

Yes, after after Palm Swipes, after needs to happen. Just be sure to keep up the high energy level. Terrible ad marvels at French fries reviewing a potato. Now I've seen everything. Proud soul. Now we need mashed potatoes. Vinnie. Reviewing French fries. we need mashed potatoes. Vinnie. Reviewing french fries.

Reviewing a potato. Advanced catch. There are so many levels of irony here. I'm not sure what to think about it. Dr. Steve flexes with. Palm to tear exposed. I don't think he's actually a potato. Thought kicker inquires what gives it away.

Cream explanation warns. you must be careful. This is libel and slander. From YouTube, Michael writes, great fucking point, Carl. I was thinking that myself last week. I never imagined this is how adults would act when I was a kid, but here's a crying potato man, the night rambler gets one in with.

The dude has a chip on his shoulder. Oh! And Jay plays us out with, at least the host of the potato show is living cleaner than John. This is getting so weird that the news section is ahead of the show. We just did that segment. Yes. And there's already comments about it. I know, right? Fuck is going on.

It's like people are paying attention outside of the show or is that way? The future is now. ["We Feel The Free Real Reveals"] With Vic. Yeah. Wah, wah, wah. So I am excited to have Vic on this show

because she is going to be performing stand-up in Nashville. Yeah. She will be in the Egard, Vin a unique art and many poly and I'm big. I hope that you're getting a tight five together for this. I am. I started doing it again like three weeks ago. You don't have a tight anything. I have a tight asshole and that's about it. Very good.

I'm excited to see you do stand. It's going to be a lot of fun. I'll be in the front row laughing, Lisa Scott, the engineer. Yeah. Vix only job is to make Julie seem funny. He said, I'm full of love.

Oh. Do we have any more, or more do we have new reviews this week? You do, I have three for you. Perfect. This one is by a cosonator too. They say, I like this show just not very much. Two stars. It's a five star. Hey fool to solve. Yeah, they finally started getting it.

This next one is Kevin is a smart one. This is one giant parade of losers telling one unfunny joke after the other. That only the losers who listen to this podcast can find funny. Imagine listening to nine minute stories stuffed into a briefcase and then throw them like beers from the balcony while you're driving around in your car talking to yourself and looking for your doggy. This is exactly what this podcast is like. Horrible. That's a five star. That's a good one.

Uh, it is a five star. Nice. That's how you do it people. That's perfect. And then this last one is worse in the show they criticize. I don't get the premise of the show. They rip on some show that is better than what they're doing for an hour. Then the rest of the show is drive time warning shock, shock, shock. What do you got me there. Nailed it. That's a one star. Absolutely. All right.

Who will find out? Have to break. What's the ratio at now? The one to five star. I don't know. Colin, tell us what you think the ratio. I'm going to get to take it. It's time.

I'm going to turn her over dry Sorry, I actually have two more five stars than one stars. Oh shit We have flipped it. That's amazing. I was not expecting that we were someone the whole I don't know how to feel I'm gonna find a three star rating. So congratulations Carl. Yes. I have to put that in the promo for Nashville because they're asking me how to market this event in Nashville. Well, check out ratings. We're a three star podcast. Three inches and three stars. What else are you going to do at one o'clock in the afternoon?

That's our slogan. All right. Let's hit these voice mails real quick. This first one is a little bit longer than I'd like it to be. But this is a good one. There's some rapid fire jokes happening here. Hey, Carl, I know I'm late in regards to the mom's wife's life. Well, let me tell you what I'd rather do

than listen to this podcast. I'd rather listen to 10 Tom Myers' comedy album, while Oryan Sue Bitches shared long needles in my year of reading and screen-like advanced sheet directly in my ear. I'd rather listen to Sarah Silverman give me a lecture on transgender rights. While Amy Schumer flicks her sticky bean directly

in my face while praising BLM. Okay, now I hate compound and I do not understand it as I am a 40 year old black man, but at least Nick Mullin makes me laugh sometimes. I think it's called jokes. I rather awkwardly watch many devours in an entire shakaron piece of while at least screams about Carl and I sping that stupid ass will for that film that show that they do together. Okay. And in regards to producer Chris, and I sound like I see, I see, motherfuck you used to be my favorite dude.

And now he was a bottom of bottom line like you're on my hill It's so there you go and how to call him for you. I like the show. I ain't a lot for this address I like you better than Carl, but now car H is going to a forefront with that bitch ass fucking like That beard that he's growing, you know what? Fuck y'all. Big shot. I said because I love y'all. I think it's just that. All right. Thank you, I see for calling it. Brilliant call. Shackaroni pizza. I think it went through a lot in a couple of minutes. Yeah. He could read really well. It's well-spoken. Yeah. Is nobody for Vic in Nashville. I see what you did there, Vic.

All right, Banana Docs call us out. Banana Docs has a potato joke for us. Woo! Oh, there is Banana Docs. Whoa, I'm calling because the potato you played last week. Yeah, you're stealing my stick. That's not cool, fucker. Whoa! Now, here's some jokes about potatoes. What's up, potatoes's favorite horror movie? Silence of the am's.

Yeah. Oh. Um, what disease kills more potatoes a year than any other? Two butter, two losses. Uh, uh, I don't really get that one. I'm watching the biggest villain in the potato world. Don't skate or... Oh, all right.

Let's just put that whole thing in there, Doctor. Stay off my ship. All right. At least you open a joke book. I don't get that one. All right. They're all shorter than those two. I promise we're going to rapid fire up from here on out. Paco called in a few times.

And the set up to this call is that he calmly said this is too much Amy Schumer. I don't know why we're listening to so much Amy Schumer. And he is too much. And then he called back 10 minutes later with this call. So, Crowley, this is Paco. It was seriously, seriously, you're taking this much time to talk about Amy Schumer and how it's done, what's wrong with you, do it? I left the price message, maybe halfway through the in the humor segment. I didn't know it was this long, what is wrong with you? What is wrong with you?

So of course, Paco and I are good friends, and I was concerned that maybe he was mad at me. He was offended, but he called back. So, Carlos and Pacoo looks like he deserves himself with a settling down. You know what all this is given. It's upset tonight anymore. That was good. Cool.

Everything's good. Good. Back on track. I'm going to have our friends again. Back on the right track. With the show. Thank you. I'm going to have our friends again. Back on the white track. What's your show? Thank you.

Pockles, the only regular listener that was surprised, Senator John came up later. Oh, okay, this is Senator John segment. Okay. Thank God. I wasn't expecting that. Now we're friends again. Uncox the gun. Takes the anthrax out of the envelope.

All right, all right. All right. all right. He made up for it with that. That's fine. This is a sediment I might agree with. Our show is getting too long. Carl, oh my god, my voice is gone from the concert. Anyway, I'm in many more months until we get a four hour

long episode of WHP. I'm really looking forward to that. Maybe a five hour long episode of W-H-A-T-P. I'm really looking forward to that. Maybe a five hour long episode. That'd be really cool too. I think you could swing that for me sometime, but I think it's gonna focus on. All right, I got it. I got it. It's too long. All right. I understand. Working on it. You follow, I'm sorry, I'm following you twice in a row. But I finally looked at your YouTube channel and I just

seen the thing you did with me anyway and looking at the mom's wife left. I've been it looks like a potato. It's so funny. I know you probably won't play this voice in hell but I just wanted to say that's hilarious. Bye Carl. It is hilarious, I will play that voice. People should go out YouTube channel and check out us goofing out of potato. That's one of the better bits we've done. So I called out Tucker Dixon because he said Mrs. Tucker Dixon was,

or maybe Casey said Mrs. Tucker Dixon was coming to the live show. Mm-hmm. So Tucker got his wife to call and to answer back or clap back at us here. Hey, Carlos Tucker. And I just heard the latest episode. You better keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth. I knew what that needed.

Hey, my wife wants to talk to you. Hey, Carl, this is Mrs. Dixon and this is my talk. How can you not believe someone has a smart, funny, and handsome and Tucker Larry? Maybe I will come to Nashville now. But all that Tucker does is so wonderful. Anyways, Anita out. Alright, I think it back. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman.

He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's obviously very happily married to a woman. He's a need of dicks in.

He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in.

He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of dicks in. He's a need of d I have a message for the potato. I'm a fucking stab you. I'm a fucking kill you. You don't fuck with. W-H-E-P. You don't know where I'm from, bitch. I'm from the streets. Fucking kill, from the street. Fuck, fuck, fuck kill you.

Alright, I shouldn't mention, is everyone's talking about in the discord, that Paco was a guest on Cardiff Electric show. So if you need to hear more from Paco or and or Cardiff Electric, that's where to go for that. And if you're trying to get on the show, turn yourself into a vegetable or a barnyard animal?

Correct. If you could threaten the life of potatoes, be aware. Oh he's good. I got a better would you rather than that fuck talk addiction? Yeah. Would you rather lick the shit under uh, uh, stuttering John's fingernails and probably catch some bizarre new playing that is yet to be seen and darn Listen to an hour long Tom Maya special and probably committing voluntary suicide Figured out figured out good choice on our going back in voluntary suicide Never heard such a thing. It sounds awful

Russell the gut out of my hand Coral I just want to call in and tell you you look like a muppet Jacked up teeth Also you talk too loud what? Big fan Thanks, buddy, you get used to it Well, what's in that big thing? The show All right, thanks, buddy. You get used to it Talking to other people like a puppet. Oh, okay. This guy calls me out and rightfully sell

Rightfully so on this one. Oh Carl Nobody do the cure in my car song for the only parody contest because I'm calling dibs totally gonna do it and then you know fuck you're doing it wrong and we're the silver bullet song let's send you out of the cage and write some songs you wait me fuck all right I love the show he's right he's right I was a perfect song parody that I, what do you do all we? I declare that I was gonna do it. I know. I said I was gonna do Snoop Dogggy Dwarg.

Yeah. That's the only thing that's gonna go easy around here. Oh, I'm the laziest. Shout out to the Smith song parody guy for giving me an entire voicemail history lesson. If you guys remember last week, that stoner show, the guy had a given entire history lesson on music festivals before they talked about,

I give you remember where I was tripping balls at that fish show. So this guy called it literally left a three minute long voicemail about voicemail. I was like, well, I get it. I'm not gonna play. So here's the last voicemail. I'm excited about this because we're talking about people.

We're gonna be showing up to the live show. VIX gonna be there. Mr. VIX gonna be there. Their gay friend is going to be there. Who else is going to be there? You got it all. This is cocaine Jesus. I'm calling about the live show cocaine Jesus. I'll call it that. All right cocaine Jesus will be at the live show again. I haven't seen him since Chicago. That must be when he's not on cocaine.

Yeah. Hey, guys, it's cocaine. Jesus, what's up? That's when he's watching the show. Sleep in the front. Oh, boy. All right, Vick, did you figure out what you're staying in the Nashville?

Yeah. Yeah, I did. Oh, nice. Well, we are going to have some type of party. So I am looking forward to that. You're going to be there one. Are you there for Friday? Friday. Yeah. Okay. We'll have a party Friday for sure. We'll go out. So exciting. Carly. Can we? I know. That's so exciting. I know that's dripping with sarcasm, but I'm also excited about that. So, Vic, thanks for your

time today. Thanks for happening on with us. Of course. It's my favorite way to spend a Saturday. Jesus, I gotta go. This is getting stupid. Bye, guys. Okay, folks. Guess what? The episode's over. I gotta go. Goodbye.

Goodbye. W-A-T-P-L-I-D-O-M is where you get tickets for our Nashville show, May 14th at 1 o'clock at the city winery in beautiful downtown Nashville. I've never been there, but I assume that it is. See you there.