Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep358 - The Beauty Of

Episode Date: November 6, 2022

This week we tackle that Ulta Beauty podcast everyone has been talking about. I know, it's long overdue. It turns out that telling people that you're attractive is not what makes someone attractive. Go figure. Pat Oates joins us for a bit then his tech issues get the best of him. I will be donating to the "get Pat a real laptop" fund, I hope you will, too. We visit Stuttering John for part 2 of his last ever Beer on the Balcony before checking out what Chad Zumock considers his best work on the Alan Cox Show. Also, an update on Vic's bubbas. https://youtube.com/c/PatOates Support us, get bonus episodes, Vic pics, and watch live every Saturday and most Wednesdays: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode 58 are you a boner guy? You know what I miss penis. What are you talking about? I'm the one who should apologize cuz Cuz a row cuz a row slap a runie at showtime W-A-T-P The Blah-T-P Hello, Robert H. Cuzzle-Rews. Welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts, the only show that thinks this is the most important election of our lifetime. So if you're a W-A-T-P listener, please do not vote. I'm your host, Karin, with me today,

a man who was called Hall and Oats in High School, probably, it's Pat Oats. What's happening, Pat? Yes. I was called that a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar.

I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar.

I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I was calling it a liar. I then, I'm sure. I don't know, it's made for us. Please go to whoarethese.com to get our email address, voice mail number, link to our sub write at link to the Discord server, link to our merchandise, link to our YouTube channel, and then we need to pay you around a supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month

and you can watch the unedited show live while we're doing it, after we're done doing it, whenever you want, I leave them all up there to check out. We're gonna do a bonus show, I gotta get a schedule still. We're gonna get Bob Lee Vian, we're gonna doing it, whatever you want. I leave them all up there to check out. We're going to do a bonus show. I got to get a schedule still. We're going to get Bob Lee Vianne.

We're going to do the next part of Easy for You to Say. Cool. I'm excited about that. John's trying to take his content away from us, but he cannot. Nope. I still have much of his book to get through. Yeah, a lot. Also, we encourage our listeners to give us a 5-star review

and a little podcast and then shoot all of us in the comments section. Hopefully a review girl or two shows up. Mm-hmm. Because we got a lot of questions for Vic. Got some splain in there. to review an Apple podcast and then shit all over us in the comments section. Hopefully a review girl or two shows up. Because we got a lot of questions for Vic. Got some spleen and now we need some answers here. But before all of that, before our chat zoo box segment and our new stingers that we have for Chad, before stuttering John's last beer in the balcony part two, before using that. We're reviewing a show called The Beauty of.

This was a suggestion from the great Missy B. Pat and I both listened separately. We have not discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it. This is a ultra-beauty podcast hosted by David Lopez. Pat, can I read you the description of this show real quick? Oh, you can't. I'm ready.

We're going. And all the beauty podcasts, the beauty of joined David Lopez and his iconic guests as they go beneath the surface of non-traditional beauty topics. Each episode, they dive into timely cultural conversations, the spark curiosity laughter and newfound knowledge. Listen now as they explore the unexpected beauty of beauty. So basically what this show is, is they find people who are unattractive in every single way,

and then try to convince people that we should be attracted to them. And I think that's a funny thing that we do now in 2022. Like, hey, look at that big fat fuck over there. No, no, no, she's hot. Oh, I got a high-end idea. I thought she was just disgusting.

My fat makes her study me straight there, all to beauty. I thought she was just disgusting. My dad makes sure he's studying me straight. They're all to beauty. I'm going to this corporation. It's letting me know what's going on. So there were two episodes I listened to. One of them was with this woman, Tamara Welcott. And she is a bodybuilder or like a weightlifter. She's a rudster.

Why would she? She's a monsterster. Like, she's one. We are listening to two voices that share been made by Jim Henson, by the way. When you listen to this, you're two of the weirdest voices I've ever heard come out of people. And they should just swap because the host is a gay man whose voice would fit better on a monster woman.

And then the monster woman would fit better on a gay man. It's weird. It sounds like you're doing effects and you're not. Yeah. That's hilarious. All right. Let me play here the intro to this show. So we all understand what's going on here.

Hi, friends. Welcome to the Beauty of a No.2BD podcast where we talk with and learn from the pioneers that are helping us redefine what beauty is and where it lives. I am David Lopez and I've been called many things and I've had many titles, but today I am your host. Okay. You can tell me that Leslie Jones is attractive, but he isn't. So I'm not going to fall for that. I don't know what you think you're going to accomplish with the show, but I'll give it a chance. See what happens.

Not even that. Just right from the beginning of his day, I've been called a lot of things. I know all the words a lot of us sent our head and never calling them. It was like, I was thinking you were that too. We didn't mean that. He's a real bundle of sticks. This guy. I've noticed that. Oh, yeah. And then, so like you mentioned, this Tamara woman comes on and she gives us some real Herman monster vibes. Tomorrow welcome to the end.

Hi David, thanks for having me. Hi guys. That's like when friend Norris used to do that. That's a girl everybody to see that. Oh, that's a girl, everybody, to see that. When Fred Norris did the, uh, the cold bass voice. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Oh, hi, Howard. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh both beautiful and strong. What was that like for you to really dive into portraying to the world? I am physically strong and physically stronger than most people. You have a Guinness World record. Yes. But I'm still beautiful. Uh-huh.

Was that always part of you or did you have to develop those two to live together? What kind of fucking question is that? What does that even mean? I don't know. What most questions are riddles? question is that what does that even mean? I don't know. Most of his questions are riddles. He doesn't know how to phrase that. He just goes rambling on sentences. So he doesn't really end up where he started.

And I'm shocked. He answers anything. Yeah. I guess what he said was, when did you decide that you're attracted, which is not how that was to be like, curl, when did you decide having fucked up teeth was a good thing? Well, Billy Corgan and I got together. And we had a little conversation about it.

It's not how that works. I thought they were asking, when did you decide, when did you find the thing that would make people not notice that you're ugly and notice something else? Oh, well, that was the other words. Yeah, when did you decide if I get super strong, like a super man, that no one will notice that you're the grossest lady ever. Right, like I could wear like a quirky hat or something and

that people wouldn't talk about my teeth so much or my chin or my club. I'm just doing that. It's already when you could turn down a little bit because you are actually peaking on my recording. Oh, I'm just screaming. I'm just screaming. I do, I do too, but I just want to be on a make sure that we don't have some to story more things that can comment about us. Oh no. All right. This is the

answer to that question. All right. We all heard whatever question that was. Let's see what she comes up with for that. People were saying don't do this. Don't do that. If you lift this heavy, you're going to do you're're going to look this way and you're not, you're going to lose that feminine essence. And I'm like, but these curves are popping though. What are you talking about? It's getting better and better like fine wine. So definitely, I just owned it. Curves, you mean like your biceps? Like what curves is she talking about? Have you looked at her? Yeah, I did. Yeah. I didn't, I, I'm purpose didn't, but I didn't want to know.

I wanted to learn at the end, and I never checked, because I almost threw up, but it was like, I didn't even know she was black until halfway through. Yeah, she looks like Juno Biscotti's liver. I was gonna qualify that, and I'm like, no, that's it. Yeah, that's it. That's about it.

I get it. Dark and gay. That's it. Precisely. All right. So this person, besides being a body builder and unattractive, is also really dumb. There's days right now where I'm driving to the gym.

I'm like, I don't want to go. But the hardest part is getting there because I'm dedicated. It's like paying the light bills. Do I want the lights to go out? the hardest part is getting there because I'm dedicated. It's like paying the light bills Do I want the lights to go out? No? Does anyone pay light bills? Do you have light bills in your house, Chris? I don't get that analogy at all. I go to the gym. Oh, I can't think she goes more into it. She can't break the town so it's even sadder and weirder.

It's so bizarre. I mean, listen, I go to the gym because I want to look this on attractive. I can't look this on attractive. These biceps are ridiculous. I can't have things. I don't go to the gym. No, I got it. You're making bad decisions. You know, but you go to the gym to improve, to get better, to have results. You don't pay the light bills to get better. You work hard to get money to pay the light bills. You know, she's not like dedicating to signing a check. That's just she says she's doing. The analogy is wrong. I agree with you there. Aside from the fact there's no such thing as a light company that you pay light bills to also the analogy is

right. You wouldn't believe this to mirror up but that's actually electricity that makes the lights go on. So you want to pay your electric. You want to pay your electric? You want to pay your electric? Yeah. Alright, you know what, I'm just going to hit these clips because the time that I clipped them I thought they were funny. So let's find out why I clipped them. I want to go back and fact check because you do have the Guinness World Record for a word that I still cannot say cumulatively.

Cumulatively. Cumulatively. Lift. Yeah. Basically it's three lifts, right? You have the squat, the bench, and the deadlift. Yes. And all three together add up to 1,620.4 pounds.

That is the world record. Yes, all time world record. All time, not like genderized. All time world record. No, no, it's genderized. It's genderized. Oh, it's so weird. Wait, it's genderized.

But all time world record for the heaviest total by a woman in the world. Uh oh, Ray Tartelur. Ray Tartelur class. So David Lopez thinks the most weight that's ever been lifted in the world was done by a woman and he thought that for real. That's really dumb. That's really stupid to think that.

But the beginning part I won't call him stupid because he is what he is. He can't say cumulatively. He sees CUN and wants to say comical. Good point, no. So wait, you're the strongest person in the world. Oh, oh, no, no, I'd be like a million, found the list. If you count guys, oh, okay, now I say I was impressed for a second there. I guess it wasn't that important. So then because he just said whatever that weight was 1500 pounds or something, it's like, how do you put that in perspective? How can I understand what 1500 pounds is? Well, thankfully, David does that for us.

That's insane. And for reference, a giraffe, an adult female giraffe is 1500 pounds. For reference, it's about as much as a giraffe. I can bench a giraffe I picked up a giraffe Yeah, that did nothing for me I never stood next to a giraffe ever I was thinking that was less of a even seen a giraffe I can't even tell you

How many kangaroos is it? Come on, you need get some more reference points. So this is a comedy podcast, right? Dude, it's the opposite of a comedy podcast. Oh, you're talking about WOTP. Yeah. Oh, what kind of bullshit? All right, so this is the worst follow up question ever.

If I can do it like so much other people can. Yeah. And you just think that's bark I I wonder if Is there something to be said about like what do you mean when some people think that they can't? What do you mean? Some people don't believe in themselves. What do you mean? What do I mean? Some people don't believe in themselves.

Well, so much people can. Like the great Samaritan fucker name said. So much people can is not a right thing. That's the thing that's been to follow up. What do you mean by so much people can? Listen, I realized that English is not your first language. Oh, it is. Oh, shit. Okay. I'm sorry. Whoops With kids she was married with kids got divorced and decided what she need to do was get strong. That's a good mom

Yeah, she's like so I'm single I have two kids at home, so I just go to the gym all the time Well, that's not I'm gonna get all life to be away from a kid. That doesn't sound healthy, but all right. This is the clip that you wanted. Pat, do you have any set up for this? It's the noise at the out everyone. It's whatever this question is fine. It's to know these man makes, which is like haunting. I couldn't sleep last night because I listened to his voice. So I want to have that conversation. What was that like for you?

It was. So in the beginning when I first started lifting, first of all, white dominated sport, male dominated sport. Here comes tomorrow. Well, got walking into a gym like only girl there at 11 o'clock at night most of the time. And then. Oh, what was that noise? I was like, why does Pam, I'm gonna clip this part.

I'm gonna see to it that I heard that he had, I'm like, oh, okay, no, I got it. That was it. That makes sense. At first, I thought he meant, like, oh, that's scary. But then I'm like, oh, maybe he's excited to have all those men alone with him. Oh.

Only one woman at the gym. Mm. I like the sound of that. That sounds good. All right, alone with him. Only one woman at the gym? Mm. I like the sound of that. Man, that sounds good. All right, I'm in. All right, what you are about to hear might be the longest and dumbest question of all time. I say that often, you know, I'm in the business of beauty,

but I'm not in the business of selling things. I'm helping people find things that make them feel good. When you feel good, you're better able to communicate your thoughts and your ideas and your feelings. And then you spread that feeling of goodness onto others. There's just like funny kind of trope about like, you know, nothing feels as good as when you're in a bad mood, nothing feels better than spreading the bad mood because it does spread around.

But when you feel good, you know genuinely genuinely happy people that feeling spreads on to you Like oh my that person feels so good. I'm curious Since you're using kind of a beauty approach to help you feel good Girl, I need to know the tea. What are you putting on the skin? Like do you you're like? Okay? I need this foundation I need this in the skin. Are you thinking about all these things like when you get your nails? And you're like I need the strongest gel, strongest acrylic. Like what is, I mean, first of all, the nails. What is going on here?

I hit that on deck. We almost doubled up. Dude, what was that question? I've no idea. It was something about spreading joy and then it was about like the types of nails she put on or pressed on nails or something. I don't know. Well, it started with skin. It also started with mood. about spreading joy and that it was about like the types of nails she puts on or press on nails or something.

I don't know. Well, it started with skin. It also started with mood. Yeah. Like, basically said, hi, I'm a moody bipolar bitch. I like the yellow people sometimes. When I do that, I make fun of their skin. I like my skin.

Your skin's nice. Power your nails. I was fucking nuts. Thank you for putting that into perspective. Now I understand. Obviously. Duh. I was talking about it. Thank you for putting that into perspective. Now I have to stand tight. Obviously, duh. Trump was the worst president we've ever had.

His hair is fake. What do you do with your hair, by the way? Because your hair is amazing. Tell me about it. That probably is a Southern John quote. You just said something. Probably. All right, so I guess this is a compliment.

I'm not sure. You're talking about pouring into yourself and I know that lifting for you is a way that you poured into yourself that it became about competition. And it seems to be that it's a competition but I don't get a sense that you're a competitive, you're not, I don't get a sense that you're competing

with others. She's a competitive weight you're not, I don't get a sense that you're competing with others. She's a competitive weightlifter. And his compliment was... He's a genius record holder. Yeah, she's a good striker holder. She's a good striker to be other people. Yeah, she's number one. She beats everyone else.

He goes, I look at the sense that you're competitive. Was that a compliment? All right. I listened to another show for the beauty of. And this was with Virgit Hover. And she wrote a book called, you have the right to remain fat. Oh, I saw that title. I almost listened. Yeah. This is a pretty good one. So as I'm, you listen to her talk, I'm like, something sounds familiar. She was on a podcast called The Rebel Eater's Club,

which I believe we did on a crossover with Dick Masterson. Because we usually pick out these types of shows. So I've heard this before, but it never gets normal to me. Whenever I hear you will talk like this, I'm always like, wait, what do you think? What do you think's going on? And for me, Fat Fobia, which is the form of bigotry against higher weight people,

Fat Fobia is a type of bigotry against higher weight people. Have you ever heard that term before back as I haven't? I like to tell a girl, like, your weight was high today, girl. You're the high club. So what she's trying to do now is she sees how much fun it is. girl like your weight was high to the girl. You're high club. So what she's trying to do now is she sees how much fun it is to call people racist and the call people homophobes. So now she's trying to equate all of this into, oh, well, fat phobia is just

like that. And you can't point out the fact that I'm an unhealthy fat pig because that makes you a bad person to do that. Yeah, so I mean, fat phobia is a form of bigotry, right? And a lot of people don't know that because we've been taught that our attitudes towards higher weight people are right, fully negative because of health reasons, right? Right, right, right, right, right? Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, negative because of health reasons. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right.

Yes. Right. Right. Yes. Right. Right. Yes. Right.

Yes. Right. Yes. Right. Yes. Right. Yes. Right.

Yes. Right. Yes. Right. Yes. Right. Yes. would phobia come in though? Yeah, this is this annoys the shout out to me because phobia is like being afraid of something. Like I don't like spiders. Yeah. But fat people are hilarious. Right. I got one video.

I'm not afraid of any. They're not all the most of them are not fun. They are angry and they're gross. They're sweet. The fun ones come on TV, but there's scary ones that target. You don't want to go in here.

I'm afraid of them. All right. Pat does have fat phobia. Oh, that's out. On an airplane? Yeah. Well, that's true. When I'm getting out of the airplane and I'm looking down on like that might be real

13. I hope I help that's not 13. Fuck. It is 13. I have had fat phobia. Yeah. Okay. You're right.

Now we all get it. Well, let's find out why we think that it's unhealthy to be fat. Because I've had to find out your Steve about this. He also thinks that, you know, after eight years of medical school, for some reason he thinks being overweight is unhealthy.

And a lot of physicians do and scientists, let's find out why that is. I will parenthetically say that our notion of health is deeply flawed, problematic, and kind of living in the 1800s. Like the BMI was invented in the 1800s, okay? By European men. Yeah.

So, European men are the problem here. They decided in the 1800s that being fat was bad for you. Or David just broke up with the European man. Yeah, he ran into some weird stuff. You gotta get him out of nowhere. European men are the last people you're allowed to make fun of. Like, yay, talking about the Jews loses everything that he had. But these two time how European men are awful.

It's like, yeah, that's fine. No one cares about that. That makes sense. Let's get. No one cares about that, that makes sense. Let's get back into how this is basically, if you don't like fat people, you're basically a racist. In fact, Fatphobia is an actual legitimate form of discrimination. It aligns with other types of discrimination like around race or gender, or any number

of marginalized identities. How convenient. Yeah. By the way, if you don't like alcoholics, you're a fucking asshole. You're a bigot for not liking me. What's your problem, asshole? Did you drive drunk and hit those school children? Yeah. Are you drunk phobic?

What's your problem? Why are you shaming me about it? What do you drunk a phobic? I don't know. You're a phobic. What are you shaming me about it? What do you drunk a boat? You could just fight by saying well, if you don't like it you're an asshole That's awesome. I'm actually at board with this now when I was clipping it. I was angry about it now But actually this is kind of a fun workaround. So there's really a self-help podcast that we're running here.

It's just the opposite. It is just the opposite. Never get help, continue to be an awful person, it blames society. It's basically what we're doing here. And this is interesting because I like the people use the word science. It's been happening a lot over the last few years,

obviously, with COVID and things. And people who talk about science seem to know the least about it. In the sense that, you know, it's largely a belief system that isn't really based in evidence or data or science, but that is socially condoned and creates an idea of some people are better than others. So the fact that being overweight is unhealthy

is not based in data or science. No. No. What do you think about that? It's never been proven that if you're super fat, your body can't handle it, never. No, definitely not. No, it's definitely not like a high blood pressure,

diabetes, and heart disease It's never been tied to obesity never and I'm not even mad at her because she's just a lunatic A people let her do this right so she's going around as a host David little bit of job is to go come on. That's not true science has proven it He's at least have a little bit of an argument Instead of just being all I can tell there's so much skin lotion Bulk Whatever you say queen yes

David Lopez might be the worst host of a podcast I've ever heard of that is saying something. I mean, I'm there. Marissa Jones level of bad at podcasting. He doesn't have questions, he doesn't know how to follow up with anything, he doesn't challenge these people for the ridiculous notions at any point. You'd think it's like for a second, you'd be like, well wait a second, isn't there some science? Is there been a study or two that maybe Link's obesity

and some health problems? Maybe just like water too. I don't know, am I crazy? You probably should have researched this. Wouldn't it be more or less weight? Because a number could be higher or lower, but with weight it would be more or less. So it wouldn't even be higher weight people.

That doesn't even make sense. It's not even the correct phrase But higher sounds more empowering Right, oh you want to take me out my throne cuz I'm higher Yeah, you're not as wonderful as me because you're higher it's because you're going to die And by the way, not for nothing, but there are issues with weight, like even on a treadmill,

you have to be under 220 pounds. To get like, they're inherent issues with being overweight, beyond just your health. Like just things functioning around your chairs, for example. For sure. You can't ride a horse, we learned a few months back. Yeah. There are elevators that can't write a horse, we learned a few months back that.

Elevators that can't operate when it's made to hold several people if you do yourself get a heart. Yeah, actually, I'm pretty sure that Kobe Bryant's helicopter is because a fat chick got on it. I said, go, where are you guys going? I'm going that way too. Is that cool? He's like, that's fine.

I'm not fat. What could go wrong? Yeah. That's what that big fat foe will get you deaf. Yeah, she thought his last name was beef. Wait for me. Wait for me.

Yeah, that was a higher weight joke. All right, this is this is some up talk right here. Like there's all different ways that fat phobia manifests. So now I hate her for two reasons. Yeah. Like there's all different ways that fat phobia manifests. Yeah, like they call you a cow, they call you a pig,

and there's a lot of ways that this man is fast, obviously. So Pat, I'm happy to tell you, we have a solution. She actually has the solution to fat phobia. And I'm really here to dismantle it. So I see, like the culture is like, oh, a solution to fat phobia, just try and force and bully every fat person to become a thin person.

Correct. That is correct. If you bully fat people person to become a thin person. Correct. That is correct. If you bully fat people enough, they'll stop eating. Yeah, that's been the rules through every middle school ever. Correct. It's a good thing. I'm glad she knows it at least.

I mean, she doesn't care about it, but at least she knows that that is the solution to this. All right, let's find out. What is the definition of health? Because these two numb knots have a really hard time with it. They can't figure out like what that even means to be in good health. I know plenty of people that would, according to a BMI index or according to a doctor, oh, they're overweight, they're obese, but they can run a mile faster than I can. They are more flexible than I am. They're more healthy

in the way that we consider health to be healthy. Where do you see the intersection really? What is your definition of health? Mm, yeah, that's really complicated, right? I think I wanna sort of, I wanna talk about that question, but I wanna start by saying that, you know, no one has to be healthy, no, right? No one has to be healthy.

He was trying to set it up like, yeah, but what does healthy even mean? He was trying to set it up for something, but yeah, of course, there's lots of different ways you can define this and lots of different ways you can measure it. And said she goes, yeah, but who has to be fucking healthy? What's the point of that? I'd like to answer your question, but not answering it. Yeah. I know the cigarettes are bad for you,

but I like to smoke them a lot. So what the fuck? I'll put back. I need to get all the way up my back now, please. But to be a singer is saying no one has to be. Like I don't have to not play in traffic, but I'm not going to do it. You're just a saying you don't do.

You want, even if that people want to live. Right. Because there's a Twinkie tomorrow. I'm saying you don't do what you want even that people want to live right Because there's a twinkie tomorrow That's a bad example there's not oh shit the Twinkies are All right, so then this is quick. Yeah, VMI stand for I know I think I'm in. All right. So then this is great. I'm in real quick. What was VMI stand for? I know I think I know. Body mass index, right? Right.

And why does he keep saying BMI index? Yeah. The ATM machine, right? Yeah. Yeah. I was like, oh, is that means to the else? No, this guy's an idiot. I think that's what it comes down to.

All right. So now, because they're starting to talk about health, and this is a tough one, this is tough enough to crack when you're obese. So now she decides to compare herself to disabled people, and just on behalf of my friend crippled Jesus, I find this to be, and my friend, Blind Mike, I find this to be a bit offensive. Look at the disabled community, right? Like I think people with disabilities have an activist within that space

have consistently been saying, like I'm never going to be your notion of healthy. That doesn't mean I don't get to be a full human. You get to treat me some kind of way. Yeah, but the difference is blind might can't see if he stops eating Oreos. You can fix with the element that you have here. That's the point that everyone's making. Yeah, like you for every disease

We do walks, but the only thing that would solve about walk with health is being fat That's a good point. That's really fucking funny. Yeah a 5K for madness. Who's running it? Oh you fatties For 75k is actually solving the problem That's all here All right, I just have a couple more here First semifinal, he's actually solving the problem. That's hilarious. All right, I just have a couple more here. And this is beyond stupid. So now these are talking about how the problem is

these pesky scientists with other science. That's what the real problem is here. If science isn't serving humanitarian ends, then what is the point that we're doing? What's the point of it? And it's like, right, because are we making science for aliens? For like some, I mean, like, what are we,

you know what I'm saying? It's like, so if by our scientific notion of whatever health is right now, if that's excluding 68% of the population, which is like the plus size population, if that's excluding 70% of the US population, then it's not working. It's not working. It's not working. No. I mean, you just, you took us all to church. By the way, I don't think you did this on purpose, but yeah, you're turning science into a religion right now.

Like, yeah, but I want science to tell me that what I'm doing is great. That's what science does. That's not the point of fucking science you idiots. Oh What a morgue You can't take your own it's a whole like it for proving shit, right No, let's play this is the last clip that I have on this show and it's Great because this woman is wildeal beast. She's talking about fat phobia, and if you don't like your racist,

and then she's like not a victim enough. So she has to bring up this weird thing about how when she was a child, she was treated like a boy. It sort of started with a conversation I had with a friend I grew up with, and she said, do you remember when we were little and how you were always expected to play the boy, whenever we were play acting?

Really? Yeah. Whenever we were play acting like stories from the babysitters club or from books that work. Yes. heterosexual romances. Yeah.

In which I am being expected to play the boy 100% of the time and it's not even discussed. It's like, there's not even consent or it's just like understood that as the largest body girl that I was supposed to play the boy, right? What does that have to do with anything? Say that shit for your psychologist if you're that concerned about it because that doesn't mean anything to anyone. Yeah.

I had to play the boy. So she said at the beginning she didn't even remember this happening. Right. A friend told her, and by the end of that statement, she's like, oh my god, all the concern it gave me. Like, you don't even remember, bitch. Yeah, you're not traumatized, did you? This is, they probably didn't happen.

You're friends with me. Nobody plays babysitters club. It's not even a thing. Yeah. I knew when you were a boy, I was like, no, I don't remember what I was a boy. I'd be the best psychiatrist ever. I think you're like. I don't think I'd be the best babysitter. I feel the worst babysitter. You don't like scotch? Are you sure we're trying it? Have you tried scotch? Because it's delicious. It's a quite a tough case. Who are these take talks would be amazing. Let's delicious. So the quagga taste. The moral of two kids that who are these take talks would be amazing.

I don't want to say. Let's go. Let's stop stealing that one. I don't see you writing, producer Chris. All right. All right, I'm ready to move on. Mr. Magenta sent in a song parody that had me rolling. And this one gets into our settering job stuff here.

I didn't shower today and I smell like gas. That is disgusting. Stain shirt, shit shoes, and we don't know where I'm going to. Pick, quick, Scott and Y'all, getting drunk and acting like a tough. They all run away as fast as they can Cause ain't nobody gettin' near a stained-clined man I mean, surely though, it'd be honest with you, man I would've done the exact same thing if a fuckin' man

With stink lives and a microphone It came to me, I'd call the goddamn Barreet Pit stains, chip tooth I can't stop drinking, that's the honest truth. Lip dick, itchy palms, when I do stand up, yeah, I always bond. They all run away as fast as they can, because ain't nobody getting near a stinkline man. Perfect, Mr. Rejet. Killing it once again, speaking of people who are killing it, this is a 10 second video that I want to play on me.

Add this to the stream yard, everyone can see it. This is that animated, Suttering John show on YouTube. Or just takes real audio and animates it. It is a day in the life of an idiot. It's what this one is called. Uh. Uh. Uh.

Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh.

It's perfect. Uh. Uh. So what happens? And if you're not watching the video, he up he goes to the pub he comes home and podcasts What was the other thing that he did there watching the game? Oh, he was driving He goes to bed there's the orange juice next to him. There's empty course cans everywhere Phenomenal all right, I like the list of enemies on the wall There's empty-cores cans everywhere. Finavenal. All right.

I like the list of enemies on the wall. Yeah. Yeah. Shulee SH-O-O-L-E. All right, let's officially get into it here. When we last left you, Stuttering John was performing his final beer on the balcony with his good buddy, Joey Cola. Let's get back into that, shall we? Cause they were talking about Jimmy Fallon. And Joey Cola told the story about meeting a young Jimmy Fallon, helping

him out. And then Jimmy brought him on the tonight show years later. And then John told the story about Jackie, the joke man, be a dick to Jimmy Fallon. And now we have to bring up the fact that when Jimmy Fallon took over for Jay Leno, he did not bring John over as a writer either tonight's show because Jimmy Fallon is a smart person. So he knew better than to do that. But then Jimmy's on the show right before he takes over for Jay. While he's, I visited him in his dressing room. And while I'm in there, they play one of the bits

that I wrote, a video bit on the thing, and he's looking up, he goes, wow, that's pretty funny. I go, yeah, that's me, Jimmy. I wrote that. And he goes, oh, that's awesome, John. So I go, hey, Jimmy, I'd love to write for you now. That Jay's leaving, because I was Jay,

you know, I was just afraid of. And then, yeah, sure to just contact my head guy. They blew me off. Yeah, well, that happens, man. It's, you know, whatever happens is just meant to be. And then if it, something didn't happen, it didn't happen, whether it's in show business or your regular life or whatever, you know, all right. I love when John gets rational people who understand how life works on a show because they immediately realize they have to explain this to him. Yeah. Like John, okay, well, he didn't hire you. But so what?

There's another opportunity out there. Go do something else. Make something else happen for yourself. No, I'm just going to get pissed off on my behalf. Yeah, no. So literally, Joey has to explain to John that being bitter about it is doing him no good. This is not helping him in any single way. And of course, John's not hearing it.

So he goes on for a while about how like, yeah, I've had opportunities. He actually tells his whole story about how he was going to be in this movie and then he wasn't in this movie. John's not paying attention to any of it. So as Joey's talking here, watch John just typing and reading the chat and just doing anything but listening to his gas stock to the junior jumble. I did the backyard one day and by shed, you know, shopping my lawnmower blade or whatever. He's trying to figure out his matchbox cars. I don't know if that's what it is. I don't know if there's no keyboard.

You got two action figures. You got one of Jimmy Fallon, T-Lat on his background. Yeah. All right, but hold on. Who do you think will win the firebird or the Corvettes? Because I got a sweet track in front of me. I'm in the backyard one day in by shed, you know, shopping in my lawnmower blade or whatever.

And I got the radio on and Rocky Allen is talking to Matthew Perry. So Rocky Allen says to Matthew Perry, hey, a good friend of ours, Joey Colas, and you're moving and you're promoting. Then you got coming up. So Matthew Perry goes, no, he's not.

I knocked him out. So Rocky Allen is like, what, he's not knocked him out. So, he's rocking all the time. What? Joey's waiting for his spot, too. I realize that the John is not paying any attention. He's not in pretending to pay attention. No, he's making a sandwich. He's doing something completely different.

Nantim Perry's not in the mood. Joey's interviewing himself. He's literally stopping answering those questions. He would be great. All right, we knew this was going to happen, Pat. Haven't it's happening again. All right, I should bail on you guys. I will figure out a better way.

I apologize everyone listening. I'm poor. I'm terrible. Call me nice. It's fine. Dude, I will. I'm going to bail on you guys. You can do your thing.

Listen, I will start a fundraiser to get a new laptop for Pat Oates from a very beloved Co-host of the show all proceeds a patreon mini Alright, see you Pat god dammit. I love Pat. I know that sucks I want to make it work, but not so badly that I'm going to try fucking zoom again Super annoying Zoom mock. Oh, I see what you did there. All right. Let's finish this clip up. They knocked them out So Rocky Allen was like what? He goes, yeah, they knocked him out. He's not in the movie anymore I'm using John Taney is a friend of mine and so I got kicked out of the movie and at that point I had the William I was with the William Morris Agency

I was you know I was I had a lot of heat going on and I called my manager and he said yeah it's his movie so you know he knocked me out. So that whole time he's explaining to him how he missed an opportunity on a movie that he thought he was cast for and then he wasn't cast for it and he he goes, and for a moment, I was bitter about it. And then I got over it and it turns out that was a great thing for me because I ended up doing this and this and this and this. Yeah. And John is not listening to a second of this.

He refuses to learn anything, pay any attention. So as he continues to explain to John, how to be successful in life. This is so insulting. We were talking about that bit that John wanted to play where he was playing Bob Ross. Oh, yeah. And he couldn't find the bit. Right. So finally, because John's not listening to this guy at all, he just interrupts him with us.

Because as you get older, you know, you get wiser and you get burnt to a certain extent by other people and circumstances. And then what you have to do, the only one that's that survive and the only thing you really could do is take it in, use it as an experience and then roll to the next thing. That's all you can do. Hey, Joey, can you do it? We can't find the Bob Ross. Can you just do it? What an asshole. Joey, could you do it? We can't find the Bob Ross. Could you just do it? What an asshole. Bob Ross, I'll do it. I'll do it, okay. Yeah, I do it, do it.

I'll do it a bit, I'll do it a bit. Can you just fucking tap dance for me, asshole? Why are you explaining to me how to live my life? Yeah. I obviously am not going to learn. I'm 57 years old, I haven't learned yet. You're gonna teach me how to fucking live my life now? Joey, come on, just do the fucking bit.

What, I mean that, by the way, this is the last beer on the balcony, I've already think, I don't think John's ever gonna come back to doing this again. I think he's just a broken man. I mean, we can talk about theories later. Okay. But this is such a perfect ending for him,

because this shows how terrible he is at doing this. He can't even listen to a self-debted, canning story where his ears should perk up and be like, oh, well, I'm not the only one. Honestly, if he went hot sucks for you, that would be better. He would be listening. He's fucking listening to it.

That would be better. That would be for you. I'm just going, just do the fucking bit, asshole. I don't have you on here to talk about your life and your history. Yeah. What are you doing? It's like I'm interviewing you. No.

And showing even says I'm older and wiser. You know, he's actually giving him a compliment and here's how John proves that he's wiser. Dude a bit. Yeah. John, you've been around a long time. You've probably learned this stuff. No, I haven't. No.

Do the bit. Say the line, but that's exactly what that is. All right. So Andrea Brower still looking. This is what he's typing, by the way, while this guy's talking, he's like, could you find this video? I think I found okay. So apparently she finally found that. But that's the bit. I'm going to get thrown out a lot longer than that. Yeah, I know I think Angie I found it send me the link cuz it is I Can't find it. I got people on my Instagram Facebook texted me. Can you do the paint a bit? Can you find me to paint a bit? Can you put it up?

I can't you're not doing it justice cuz oh So he makes him do the bit and then he goes here. He had didn't wrong. Yeah, you did it wrong, buddy Let's keep fighting let's keep looking for I think Andrew found it now. I'll show you so now he's already done the bit So we know what the punchline is yeah, and he's still looking for it and now he's found it and They're they're going to play it but before that happens It's funny because John's talking about how he didn't go into a stand-up comedy because he has a stutter And he wasn't sure if he could do standup comedy. And it was Joey who really actually helped him out and taught him how to be a standup.

And so Joey goes, well, you know, there are other stuttering comedians. And this works, John, this triggers John. Say fuck it because I was afraid Joey that I would stutter you know on jokes yeah should be a friend he fall over yeah right yeah there's a comedian that stutter is now that does stand up I forget his name young guy he was on HGTA thinking no I know I know yeah, and it killed me when Howard goes, oh, wow, this guy's an inspiration. I'm like, an inspiration, Howard,

you had a stutterer on your show for fucking, fucking 20 years, and then he becomes the announcer on the tonight show. Yeah, yeah. That's an inspiration. He can't let it go. And Joey, after this, even says, well, you can't think that way though,

John, that's kind of unhealthy, you know? Whatever. I'm sure John does agree with him. Yeah, you're right. John, it's not an inspiration to anyone. I can't tell you, and I mean this for real, how many notes I get from people who stopped drinking? I was gonna say that the only thing he could inspire.

Yeah, because of the Centering John because we play, people in their 20s are like, oh, I don't wanna end up like that. I have caught drinking out of my life because of what I see from your show. All right, so, and of course, when he's explaining to John, like that's not a healthy way to live

or think John again is not listening to him at all. So, now he finally finds the clip, he's going to play it, but John fucks everything up. Of course, like he always does. Because even though you were like, if you were disrespecting somebody and doing some kind of setup or whatever, the stunner and made it funnier, you know, so whatever it is, that might be. yeah, I think I finally found the clip and we lose Joey yeah, so John Fies the clip and then takes that off the screen that takes Joey off the screen He's just fucking well Jesus Christ can't make it happen sideways

It's fucking sideways of course so then This is John He has to set up this bed. He's going to play it. But he has to explain to you again, because we played these clips before that there are words used in the early 90s. Oh, Jesus. That you shouldn't use anymore. You know, now there are fans that back that hilarious. Now offensive. I'm going to say it rhymes with Cooke, but it was a derogatory term for an Asian person. Yeah, chicken. I'm going to lay off the Asian.

Spook. What's he talking about there? Spooky. Yeah, just come on, no. Spooky. Yeah, just come on, say it, John. So as he's lecturing, you know, whatever he's doing, he's explaining away the reason why you're about to hear something offensive on my show, but I don't condone it.

Then Joey comes back in and John gets him caught up on what he's explaining. I'm explaining that, you know, you use a word that in today's day and age, just said it I've seen, but keep in mind, Joey. And I've said this on my show, that when we were on Howard, it's so true. In the 80s and 90s.

Yeah. That's when you can use the term oriental. Now, you could can use the term oriental now You could only use that term if you're talking about a rug. Right I guess If you say so all right The way that John explains things to people as if they're children is insane to be this guy's going Yeah, all right now. I know and obscene is not the same as offensive correct go, yeah, all right, no, I know. And obscene is not the same as offensive.

Correct. All right, so I gave John the benefit of the doubt when we saw the stains on his shirt, but there are two stains on his shirt now. And as I'm watching the show, I go, wait, where the fuck did this come from? Why was I giving him the benefit of the doubt? He's bleeding. This is the moment that he actually spills beer on his shirt, which is what we're looking at right now, watch this.

All right. What I was telling you. He lifts up his beard, just pours it down his shirt in front of him. Why the fuck did I think for a second that those stains were like, I'm getting out in front of him and guys, of course they're not. He's a disaster. He's a mess. All right, now I was saying she had a good time to talk about some theories. Okay.

About what's going on with John, because honestly nobody knows. It's John's turned into fucking Arty Lang. Where's Arty? Is Arty coming back? What's going on? Arty is he using? Is he not using?

Now it's like, where's John? What's going on with him? We know he's trying to sell his apartment, and we know he's gonna have some cash when that happens They can do something with it. He's probably gonna move somewhere He said he's gonna stay in California so his kids are so if he does move away It means maybe he doesn't have a great relationship with them, but I don't know we'll see and I think one of the theories out there and This could be true

John's alcoholism is on full display and there are people who love John. He has family and friends. It's possible that someone got to him and said, John, you got to shut this down. Listen, I'm going to get you some help. Let's spend the next 60 days. Let's get you some help, buddy. We're going to do this together. We got you. It's possible that John's in rehab. I hope so. I honestly, I hope he comes back in 2023, and he's like, guys, I hope he looks way better. Guys, Southern John show is back on.

I'm not drinking anymore. I realize I've been making an ass of myself the last couple of years, and now we're gonna go. Cause I would actually love to goof on John when he's coherent and sober and trying to do a good job. I was thinking the same. You know what I mean?

Because this is too easy. This is ridiculous. I am rooting for him to not die. You know? You know? We are. Yeah. So I hope we all are.

No, honestly, I think all of the devil verse, Roots for this guy to pull through, but I just think that you can't be this much of a disaster on full display every week to not have someone, whether it's his mom, his ex-wife, even his kids. I don't know someone in this family go, listen buddy, you need some help. I would hope that someone would fucking do that for me if I was doing shows like this. Holy shit, maybe it's fucking Joey Cola afterwards. It's just like, dude, what the fuck is wrong with you? All right, let's talk more about the words you can and can't use.

Oh yeah, I need to hear the list again. Yeah, it's fucking cats and saying. First of all, if you watch a movie like Platoon, yeah, they use these words in that movie, oh. Yeah. Well, that's what you're talking about Vietnam like a person in Vietnam He's portraying a person who's racist we get it

John we fucking get it fucking contact. He's trying to explain this It's like yeah in the dire straits song it's not Mark Nuffler calling the guy an Eftler it's the guy who's putting in the fucking microwave of it he's playing a character why are you looking at that I see the rock name no I was thinking about the song so I got sidetracked sorry he's talking about Nikki six okay and he's watching him on MTV. All right. And he's like, look at that sewage cell

with the earring and the makeup. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway. I don't know. What do we gonna talk about, Dyer Strait Cell Day? Sure. All right, let's do it.

Chicks for free. All right. This is great because John's gonna be in New York, visiting his mom for Christmas. And obviously Joey lives in Long Island. So John's gonna go ahead and invite himself over to Joey's house. So he's a classy move. Hey, Joey, I'm I'm coming out for Christmas. Please, please. Please. I'm right. We're going to tell you When you come please please invite me over see I got an invite That's the worst thing ever okay Chris I feel like I've been teasing you

I don't know what your blue balls are like we're finally gonna get to the firehorses factory He's been talking about this fucking bit. They found the bet. They're gonna play the fucking So everybody kick back about this fucking bit, they found the bit, they're gonna play the fucking bit. So everybody kicked back. 1989, I think it is. This is one of the funniest bits from Joey Collar. And again, people, this is what? 1991.

Is it 1991? I don't know if you've found that. Is it about what somebody says in 1991? Because that's 30 fucking years ago. Here we go. Okay, so John has a very soft audience now. Yes, he explained to them 18 times, not to be offended, but the words you're about to hear.

Don't cancel me. It's fucking insane. So then he plays the bet, I'm not gonna play it for you. It's basically Bob Ross is painting a picture and then it turns out he's having flashbacks to Vietnam and he says a lot of ridiculous things about Those comedy bastards. Okay, let's put it that way So then after they play that bit it turns out Joey Cohen never used the word gook Yeah, all of that set up all of that build up and he never even said anything offensive in the fucking pants

And that's the bit that And that's the bit. That's the cleaned up version of the bit. Yeah, because when I did it in the clubs, like I would do it in a rascals and in front of 400 people are going crazy. I pulled all the punches and I went completely, you know, crazy. Yeah. And that's where you use the term, the Asian yellow. That's what that was that that was the one thing, you know like that Yeah, but you also said the word that rhymes and cook oh

Yeah, I Would say that too. Yeah John he's like, yeah, maybe it didn't happen in the evidently just watch But you definitely said this thing that's super offensive. It should never be said Like why do you bring it up up that much time to mistake cumulatively? This is 30 minutes or two. To achieve what? To achieve what?

They've destroyed this bet. Yeah. But it's actually funny. I'm like, all right, I know exactly what's going to happen. It's not funny. And then for John to like make excuses for the guy, and then he doesn't say anything that's offensive, and then he comes back and goes,

yeah, but you happy for it, all right? I mean, that's just so- It's just so- Yeah, all right. Just tell us some cook jokes. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha But did you have a bit where you were talking about a guy who's named Rams with bigger Alright, so this is again, let's talk about John's mantra in life Because we poke for them and we act like he's a bad person, but I mean obviously it's just a goof We've had some laughs it is That's actually a great guy

You know what I admire and Joey about you? You know, is you're always willing to help people? And that's like my mantra is, I'm here to help people. What the fuck else am I here for? That's right. We're only on the planet to help people. You know, my mantra is those cores are going to drink themselves. I love that he pretends that he's this charitable guy just giving back to society and all fucking times

You're a self-assert drunk John Yeah, you're selfish in every fucking way. You won't even listen to your guest talk That's how selfish you are you don't give a fuck about anyone And addicts never are addicts don't give a fuck about other people. It's fine. It's just how that works You know, I hope John gets cleaned up and I hope that that does become as a fucking mantra to help other people. All right, so this is great because

they grew up in the same area. And so Joe is explaining that, yeah, when you grow up in this area, you have two choices. You either got to be tough or you got to be funny. Because otherwise you're gonna get get your ass kicked and he Actually insults John in a way he doesn't even realize he's insulting John the best kind

They all come from this tri state area here because it's a survival technique if you better be tough or be funny here You know, and that's it. You know, I mean you know better than anybody. You know, you know You're wanted to tough toughest guys. I know You're gonna be tough for me funny. You're pretty fucking top Holy shit, that's perfect That is perfect joey It's gonna slay in it fucking nailed him holy shit. All right, so now that John's been called a tough guy He's like look at his gonna say say they say no

You don't even fucking know bro. I am super top. I don't even have to do laundry You're in a real deal to a detriment sometimes Unfortunately, some of these assholes that fuck with me don't know that Yeah, I would I would never some of these assholes that fuck with me don't know that. Yeah, I would never fuck with you. I would never. Yeah, I don't think you care until they see me in person. That's right. And then it's I would never I would never do that.

That's because you're yeah. Yeah, these people who fuck with them, they don't realize that what a tough guy he is. As he's falling over drunk. Yeah, you don't intimidate anyone, they don't realize what a tough guy he is. As he's falling over drunk. Yeah. You don't timidate anyone, John. It's a wild talking of that. It's fun now. It's fun that you've retied that.

So guess what? Produced a crest? What? To be continued, there's going to be a part three of this. Oh, cool. I can't get through this episode. If you have the balcony, it's so insane. John, there's another theory going on.

Then it's not just booze. There might be some pills involved as well. Because the way that John gets wasted over the course of this hour is not three beers. There's something else going on there. Something else is kicking in, it seems like I could be wrong. I would never wanna slander or libel someone. Right.

I wouldn't want to be libel. It's not go there. Yeah. So I don't know what's going on. But holy shit. He does go zero to 60. Yeah. It's the wall. It gets bad quick, doesn't it? Yeah. By the way, I mentioned on the show that our friend Tony Michaels is real name is Michael Anthony's. Oh, Jesus. Now I forgot. Saw forgot saw something just go phony Michaels. Yeah, so snowsky Oh, yeah phony Michaels. Is anyone use that I saw it in red it. Oh good. I like it. So phony Michaels finally admitted that he did do jail time What's let's hear his very stupid crying? Let's hear his confession. Okay. His last name

is Nozoski. That's great. General geek. He always a much higher bar than just a defense and a trial. And the reason why is because you're already convicted. Now the reason why I know these things. You know what? He sounds like the guy who does the impression of him more than he say, you know what I mean? Like that fucking nasally whiny voice of his fucking socks. He's not a broad, he's a broadcast quality. Obviously. Reason why I know these things, the reason why I know Steve Bannon will serve every single day and I want you to be rest assured that he will serve every single day of that four

months eventually is that I know because I've been in the federal criminal justice system. Yeah, I've been there. I've done that before. I made a mistake a long time ago, a bad business decision that I, a bad business decision. I've made bad business decisions before. I've hired the wrong person, worked with the wrong client, maybe presented something in the wrong way. These are all bad business decisions.

What Tony Michaels did was sell any legal substance to people and got arrested for it. There, I've done that before. I made a mistake a long time ago, a bad business decision that I decided to participate in selling a questionable product. Now questionable. You mean poison? Listen, I'm off for selling drugs. Don't get me wrong. What he was selling, though, is not what I would consider selling drugs. He's just selling poison to people. It's not what I would consider selling drugs. He's just selling poison to be a ball

Because of that I know the system. I know that Steve Bannon will serve the Alright, and then he gets into the stupid Steve Bannon shit So we found a way to be smug about his past, dude I know he's insane He won't just come out like if you were just watching his show because he feels like he needs to come out Because everyone's tweeting and everything if you're just watching show you wouldn't be like, huh? You can go to federal prison for bad business decisions. What? What the fuck? What's he talking about? That would raise way more questions than give me answers if I was a listener of his show and enjoyed what he did. Thank God, that's not the case. Do you even imagine? No, I really can't. Anybody enjoying that all right. I have some very good news for you Chris

We need good news. Yes, because pat outs it's gone His time is past I know So we need some good news the good news is I now have on my sound board Now I on my sound board if you look at it. I have an entire board dedicated to Patrick Michael I have a board dedicated to Opie. I have an entire board dedicated to Patrick Michael. I have a board dedicated to Opie. I have two boards dedicated to Stuttery Judd. I know I have a board called Chad Zuma.

And I got some, I asked for a sticker. This comes in from Tony Musgrat. And this is fantastic. And this is fantastic. Walmart. Walmart on Dale Maybury. Walmart. Walmart on Dale Maybury. Please clap.

Well done. Fantastic job, 20 Muscrab. But that doesn't win the Stinger Contest. The Stinger Contest winner is Cardiff Electric. This is our new Chad Zumaq Stinger. It's time to mock Zumaq. Nailed it. Perfect. Let's go.

How did we not think about that? That's fucking ago. Chad Zumaq used to be on a show called The Alan Cockshow on WMMS in Cleveland. And on May 3rd, 2020, he posted this on YouTube. For everyone asking, here we go. I'm putting all the old stuff out there that people wanted. No egos, just giving people what they want. Here were the early years, oh, it's a long time.

Here were the early of years of dysfunctional greatness. That's not a good sentence, Chad. Here were the early of years of dysfunctional greatness, no bigger show in Cleveland in 2011, and they still sell on that. So Chad is putting out the best of Chad Zumak from his old radio show on YouTube, not because he wants to show how great he is.

No, no, he goes. No he goes. People are demanding it. This video has 206 views. It's hard. Demand again, I don't know. The public seems a lot smaller than I remember. It's weird.

Go figure. His failure is so transparent. It makes it fun with Chad. So what's here? What Chad thinks is some of his best of material when he was the third mic out of the afternoon tribe. Can't wait. Radio showing leaflets. Imagine this being... So he shows them to the studio his hands all wrapped up. It's all busted up. So he's going to tell this story about how this happened. So you know how we decided we were doing like a little comedy tour amongst these far away places like it was that we were calling ourselves a scumbags of comics.

Scumbags of comedy. The first show was Saturday night. It was out at the Muscatir's bar in Richfield, but it was Mike Pol, Joe Howard and Haqqar.ar, essentially just an excuse for us to hang out. All right. So Chad is doing the scumbags of comedy tour with a couple of his buddies from the radio station, I think. I don't know. I don't know. These other people. Sounds like it. Yeah. Never heard of these people. Nobody has. All right. So let's explain what happens. And Alan Cox already knows this is not a funny show and you could tell that by the way he says this. All right, so you guys did a show on Saturday night. Yeah, I expect it was a roaring success.

Everybody was drunk celebrating. It was fun. And then it just went downhill from there. So what we're doing is trying to go these far away places that don't essentially get comedy like they can they don't get down to the city full towns with nothing but frowns no laughter Exactly right So we're so and I you know the idea is good and

All right a couple things going on there first off It was Cox knows this is not a funny show you go So I assume everyone had a good time or we got really drunk right yeah, that's why we had a good time And we got wasted and it all went downhill from there is what he said yeah, Chad said it was fun He yeah, he never once said, oh, were you guys on that night, a lot of laughs, people have really enjoyed the show? No, because Ellen knows this guy, he said it's a crosser room.

By the way, spoiler, Alecox hates Chan Tsubak, I'm shocking, I know. Everyone hates this guy, it's incredible. So the other thing that Chad says there is, we're doing these shows in remote areas. We're not on people live. And that is a quote unquote, good idea. Yeah.

That's terrible idea. It's a bad business. Yeah. You should go to the federal prison for that. I'm just kidding, Chad. You have to listen to the earlier bet. I understand why I said that. I know you're fast forward to your part.

All right. So this is Chad explaining how he got blackout drunk and why that happened. This guy is full of excuses. One thing you'll never hear Chad say is this one's on me, guys. You know what? You'll never, if someone can find audio of Chad going shit my bad, I'd love to hear it because you'll never hear that out of this guy's mouth. Even from time to time, John would say something like, and I screwed it off. I've heard it.

But I think it's impossible for this guy. Need to hear some evidence of that. Okay. Like we drink a lot on these these shows and I pulled the biggest rookie mistake. I didn't eat again. I just quit. I keep forgetting to eat. Okay. And the bar owner is really nice guy. He's buying me shots of bartenders buying me shots. And I think somebody put something in my drink, somebody roofied. I really do because I don't remember anything that happened. Okay.

One thing. So check out Blackout Drunk, but someone must have roofied him. Because everyone's trying to think advantage of Chad Zuma. Yeah. Could you imagine being the bartender and be like, we got that guy fucked up. Yeah. He's not going to do it on his own. So there was like a bunch of excuses.

Oh, I never got a chance to eat and everyone's Miami shots. And I think I was roofied. Which is it? I just pick one thing, Chad. Like, why is it three things? I woke up my pants run zip. Why is it three things? Chad, all right. So remember, he busts up his hand.

And we got to find out how that happens. But uh, at one point, all I know is this is what's being told to me from Joe from Mike. I don't know. You have to momentum yourself out of this once again. Yeah. And uh, basically at one point on the limo ride back, I guess somehow Mike convinced me that he was Republican and he owns a gun and I flipped out I freaked out Uh-huh. Let's call him swear words and and listen like in retrospect like I don't care if the guy owns a gun

He doesn't he's right. He's just messing with me So in the heat of the argument I decided the best idea to end this argument is I jump out of the limo now How quickly was the vehicle going at the time I'd say about 25 25 miles an hour you figure you I jump out of the limo? Now, how quickly was the vehicle going at the time? I'd say about 25. 25 miles an hour, you figure, you'll jump out of the, yeah, yeah. I was like, I'm out of here. All right, so I'm already gonna start poking holes in this story, because I think it's bullshit.

It's a stupid story to say. Yeah. He goes, I don't remember any of this. All of this was told to me by the other guys. How fast did the limo go on? I think about 25. Wait, so you knew a fastie was going, but you don't remember any of this.

That seems odd to me. That right there already sounds a little fishy. He got an argument with a guy who said he was a Republican and so Chad decided to exit the vehicle while it was moving. Does that sound plausible to you? No, and there's other people in the limo with him. Correct, yeah. And they just let him go.

Yeah, they're like, hey, be careful. Here's my stuff. Yeah, continue to shove Yeah, actually if he said they got really annoying me and threw me out of a moving vehicle I'm like yeah, that sounds plausible. Yeah Like he's putting his head through the sun roof. He's all proud of that. They're just like yeah, get the fuck That it would make sense to me But this they're just like, yeah, get the fuck out. That would make sense to me. But this story, I'm like, huh? Okay, well, let's hear more.

Remember, Chad put this up, saying this is one of his best subs from this radio show. But it's not like I went out and I like, listen to Ellen Cox for 80 hours. I was like, do a check this thing out. Chad filed this for me. He's like, opi in that way. He's like, oh, be in that way. He's like, hey, you want to see some stupid shit here it is.

Thanks, buddy. Appreciate it. But that's, by the way, that's the dumbest, and I want to thank my friend Drew Wayne for sending this to me. He's like, I can't believe he's posting this. If I had a bit on the radio, it wouldn't even make best of the week.

This bit that he's putting out there is like his best of But that by the way, that's the dumbest thing in the world. I'm drunk. I could have been easily killed a car could it hit me? Yeah, I mean it's unfortunate that didn't happen, but I Supposed that's possible. I love it explains to us that it's really dumb to jump out of a moving limo Yeah, like we like, well, was that a good decision? No, it wasn't. Oh, okay, so that was dumb. Okay. Explain why. Yeah, no, we know, Chad.

We all know that that was really dumb. So then it's like, well, were your friends concerned about them? Pulk says to the limo driver and he goes, yes, sir. Would you mind circling back? I think my friend just jumped out of the limo. He's like, excuse me Yeah, we're gonna go pick them off. Um, that where they all freaking out when you do this by the way, they were laughing. They were laughing

So he remembers that part too. Yeah, why would you know that? Yeah Granted that that part of the story does check out It's like oh, Chad might be dead And one of the things I've never done was driven a limo, but wouldn't you know if the door was opening? Yeah, and someone like closing and while you were driving. For sure.

It seems like you would. Yeah, it seems like you would know that sort of thing. And this idea that his friends would react with laughter. And I've never seen Chad attempt suicide. Maybe I'd react that way? I don't know. I've seen him attempt comedy. No one's laughing that. That's right.

That's the only chance that people laughed at. I'm gonna kill myself. Standing up. Holy shit. This guy sucks. All right, so this is the dumbest part of the story. He says he jumped out of a limo. His friends knocked on the partition,

hey, we got to go back and pick up our buddy. Chad says he just walked to his friends house, who was in that limo by the way. And remember, they're on this like far part of town, they're way out there and who knows where. And Chad just walks and walks and walks. I'm walking and I ended up walking, I guess, like towards rocky river and it's cold out. It was very cold Yeah, and all murders of sweater best on a t-shirt So they don't immediately stop the limousine I guess 25 miles an hour's not you're not flying down the highway 25 is like when you're pulling out of a parking lot. It's very dangerous. Of course it is Why did they keep going they could have easily slowed down quickly from 25 miles an hour to zero.

The limon driver didn't know what was going on. He had the partition up. So they had like knock on the partition. Our friend just jumped out. Yeah, right. We got to go pick him up and they can't find me. Bullshit. Absolutely. Do your Alan Cox is just like, oh, okay.

Yeah, right. Right. He's not buying it. Not at all. This is all just for the radio. I'll chain out a cup of the story because he did do something fucked up. He's embarrassed by. So now he's coming buying it. Not at all. This is all just for the radio. Chad had a cup of the story because he did do something fucked up. He's embarrassed by.

So now he's coming up with the story. Oh, I got roofy and I jumped out of the limo. I'm so crazy and then I walked 80 miles. And I like, none of this is adding up to anything, Chad. This is such a horshift. Yeah, it's definitely not adding up to the result you wanted, which apparently is being the heroic victim. Right.

Why is everyone a heroic victim that we talk about? I don't know, it's insane. All right, so then Chad seems to remember what happened. All of a sudden, this is the funny thing about this story, is he goes back and forth and I was black out drunk and then this happened. So I'm walking like five in the morning. I don't know where I'm at.

In my book bag was in the limo, has my keys, my wallet, keys in my car, keys in my apartment. I don't know where to go, I don't know what to do. So I think if you were gonna jump out of the car, you'd take all your belongings with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, get any of the backpack or something. Are these your keys to get in your house? At least your keys. So I mean, I don't remember any of this.

This is what's scary. I wish you weren't a liar. So we had to remind themself, oh, I don't remember any of this. Even though it's like, I'm walking, I don't remember my book bag, I can't go back to my house, but I don't remember any of this. Like, that's how I would tell a story of being blackout drunk. Actually, I'll show you how I tell a story about being a blackout drunk. Ask me what I did last night. Uh-oh. What do you do this? I don't remember. Yeah, that's...

Shuts out. I don't know. Where did that bruise cut from? Not sure. Who cares? Your guess is gonna fly. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like that's, anyway. So last year I'm gonna throw you my life. And oh, the last year I'm gonna do is like ask my friends,

like, hey, so what do they do last? I don't want to know. Don't tell me. I'd rather not know. Just move on. All right, so now he's walking over to his friend's Mike's house and he finally gets to Mike's house. Okay.

So for some reason, I don't know where I'm at. I don't know all I know has been walking nonstop I finally get the Mike's house doors locked So he remembers that he gets to Mike's house the doors locked That doesn't make this Mike's in the limo I think well, I guess he's home by then because the limo gets there So this is the other thing. This is the other plot hole. Okay His buddies are all riding in a limo. They went to some barren grill, and they took a limo there. And then his buddies couldn't find him or something

because he jumped out and then he just started walking. He walked out of the road immediately when they went back to get him. And so they're just like, all right, well fuck it. And then I just went home. The limos are expensive, I get it. You know, I spent too much time looking for your friend. He's got his phone with them, they're not calling him.

None of this makes any fucking sense So he gets to Mike's house and the door is locked So I I Punch Mike's window. Okay, shatter it My hands all cut up like I was bleeding all over myself. You're thought I'm gonna break his window Well, I have to get my bag. He's not answering the phone and you figured it was inside Well, I have to get my bag. He's not answering the phone and you figured it was inside. So now all of a sudden Chad's going to the house where all of his stuff is. He knows where that house is, where his stuff is. He knows what he has to do to get his stuff and he punches through a window in order to get it.

You following this? I'm trying. So remember he showed up with his hand in a bandage and they're like, what happened? This is the story he's telling. And a certain point about me on the cox, I'm just like, Chad, can you come up with something different tomorrow and try that? Because this is so stupid.

This is so implausible. And Dom and you're telling it wrong. So this is actually, Alan, starting to poke some holes in this story. But so I get the bag and my keys to my place and I woke up the next day. Does he hear you break the window? No, he doesn't come down here. He's always the slugger. I do. But I guess someone calls the police.

You didn't do the elbow thing in the door. I've always put a towel around your hand. You ball up the sweater vest, put it over your fist. Or you're not. You'd rather cut up your arm. Yeah. Yeah. You ball up the sweater vest, put it over your fist. You'd rather cut up your arm. Yeah. Okay. Makes sense. So I guess someone calls the police as cat guy outside. I guess it was a whole ordeal. He was mad. And it was a whole thing. The cats out, the police are call it. He's mad. It's a whole thing. A whole ordeal. For the Sir Chris. God damn it. I know. I know you're struggling with this one. Oh, I got a few workups

Get a few more clips of chat like But this is the best part of my friends is like we know each other so well and it's just We're not none of us are mad at each other. We're just it's like perfect We're like that's exactly how we wanted the show to go just for the story So so he's just like dude he goes it goes, because I said, hey, man, I broke your window. Just tell me how much I owe you. He's like, no, dude, he goes, you figure out how to get this thing fixed. You put the window in. That's how it works. I'm not mad or anything. Just get the window fixed. You fix the window. So you jacked up

your wrist, punching the window. No, jumping out of limo. Jumping out of the limo. He is a stand hand to punch the window. He uses the same hand to punch the window. Yeah. That doesn't make any sense, Rick. Chad, this is falling apart now. You almost broke your hand. He said it's not broken, he got x-rays, but you thought it might be jumping out of the limo. And then he used that same hand to punch through

a window glass when he got to his buddy Mike's house. Yeah. And this really seals the deal that this is made up. So I'm injured now. You have to do that. I can't move my house. Yeah. And this really seals the deal that this is made up. So I'm injured now. You have to do that. I can't move my wrist. Yeah. Are you left handed?

You know what I'm right handed. So. So we punched the window out with his left hand, even though he's right handed and he had just heard his left hand. Chad, that's bullshit. Nobody punches a window out with their weak arm. You never do that. It's really stupid He sucks at lying. He sucks at comedy. He's not a good storyteller. This wasn't compelling

He thinks this is one of the best things he's ever done that radio show shocker. He's not on it anymore and Ellen sums up pretty well here and the variation is the issue. Yeah, I think I said one slid me something man I guess it wasn't a drunk. It was like a, how do you just not remember any of this? Like, I don't remember. I remember the only thing I remember is the window. That's it. Everything else is blank. Lier, Lier, pants on fire, if you ask me. So, ale and Cox, something up perfectly goes, well, inebriation is the problem here, Chad. Oh, no, no, no, that's not my fault. Well, let's fast forward to about

a year later when this happens. Also, Newtoday at six o'clock Cleveland's WMMS radio personality and comedian Chad, Chad Zumak was arrested this morning charged with driving under the influence. Officers say the 37 year old was driving in Lake Avenue in Lakewood when he went off the road and hit a tree. It happened early this morning. He was not injured and refused to take a breathalyzer test,

along with OVI, Zumaq was also charged with failure to control and a seat belt violation is currently out on bail. That's how he lost his job. I'm W.I.M.I. That's from what I've been told.

I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong about that. Don't sue me, Chad. But there you go. Ellen Cox. So you came with a bullshit story. You got wasted at some shitty comedy gig and maybe you should stop drinking so much. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

that's not the problem. That's the, he's like, Ellen, I know you host your own show and everything, but I got this. Stan Newlyne. Trust me, I know you host your own show and everything, but I got this. Stan Arlene. Trust me, I obviously know better than you do. All right, so that is our Chad Zumak segment for today's show. At this time, we need to bring in some review girls. Yes.

Review girls are here. Whoa, for a second there, I didn't know if you were wearing a top. That's a good color. Well done. Vic is here. Hello, Vic. Hello. And the Waveli Hannah. Hello, Hannah. Hi. You both are killing it today. I appreciate that. Are you both ready to catch a dabble? Absolutely. Definitely ready. And am I ready to catch a dabble. Absolutely. Definitely ready. Am I ready to catch a dab or I don't think I have this download and hold on a second while we're waiting. Everybody wants to know what's going on, Vic.

What's going on with the the picks that were promised to our Patreon members? The picks that are promised are now sitting in Carl's email. What? As of yesterday. I did. You're going to send. I fucking As of yesterday. I did. That's the picture. I'm fucking you. Fuck you. I tried to like literally a week to do like a fucking squeegee joke. Like boobs. And I fucking, uh, because I can't. Husband and big daddy

military does not want it me to show my nipples. Um, oh, you're playing this on the Navy now. And my husband. Okay. Well, I have, I have some words for Mr. Vic that. Of course. That's very disappointing. Yeah, we just got zoom out.

Got damn it. No, I don't know how it feels. All right. Well, there is a pic that is pretty crotesque. The big did send me. I wasn't going to put that up on page. I was hoping for something better, but we'll put that up. Who doesn't want to see that? I want that for a tease. I Chris. That's why I make the big box. Yeah.

Give me five bucks. I will see this awful thing. All right. Let's get right there. It's time for everyone's favorite game show. To catch a Daubler. Are you ready to play to catch a Daubler? Browder her. But now we have a big announcement of our own. The Stuttering John podcast has just inked the deal with CLNS media. Yes, CLNS, which is an advertiser, you get to play it Royce, they're an advertising company. Yeah, and by the way, we don't applaud ourselves. So yeah, they are an ad company and that's the kind of the next step

here as the show progresses. We're going to work with those guys to partner up with some great brands and we'll be bringing them to you. Yes, and we have so much to talk about today I can't tell you how excited am I'll start with my trip to Arkansas now Kansas really I don't know why I don't know how they come up with this like Missouri is Missouri but Arkansas like it should be our Kansas It's like they see a and if they see a hot, it's not a good bet. What do you think Missouri?

Well, how do you think it was pronounced, Missouri? Yeah, yeah, yeah, from the Ozark area, they call it Missouri. Do they? You would know. All right. Thank you, back. It should be our Kansas. It's like that they, and if they see a hot,

they go, hey, check out the awe on that girl. I mean, no, it's S. So ARCANZAS, I was there. I did stand up at the Grove Comedy Club. I got to give it up to the Comedy Club on the Bill Adams. He's an ex-Army guy. He was in Somalia. He's depicted in black hawk down. I don't know if you ever saw that movie, but he was one of the infantry guys that came in to save the down helicopter. But anyway, this guy was an awesome guy, and I gotta say Arkansas is beautiful.

I've never been Frank. Have you ever been Royce? It is beautiful, all green, and I asked Bill, and he's like, I got, how much can he get a house here? 150,000 for a nice size house That's it. I'm an I could fucking I can sell my place now and I moved to Arkansas and the girls and nice everyone's cool and The shows were awesome as opposed to the El Paso show, you know, I What did John say next? I know these are a little bit too long and people give card of shit for it, but it is fun to take a walk down memory lane

Yeah, we're stuttering John. I didn't recognize his voice at first. Yeah, I know that was John. Yeah, fucked up Fucking they still doing the andread for CLS. I like a rose goes we don't applaud ourselves Like they would eat doing goes on the longest victory lap ever It's pretending to still be still have a relationship with them, but she does not yeah Actually, what's better line dot AG gonna do now the chance to have two against show There's the biggest everdice her we gotta save them. All right. What was the setup? I? Gonna go back, hold on, sorry guys. I mean I can fucking, I can sum my place now and I can move to Arkansas.

And the girls and nice, everyone's cool. And the shows were awesome. As opposed to the El Paso show, you know, I- What did John say next? Alright. Here are your choices Number one people in Texas just don't get good jokes

Next I Was sick as a dog in El Paso See The club owner in Elpaso was a giant prick for the wait staff, the sound, the room, it was all awful. I'll never play there again. What kind of comedy club has carpeting? Lastly, I could not believe that they didn't do any promotion. I'm done with Texas. Just done to cash a dab.

Oh God, this is one of those ones where it could be so many different things. I loved the owner as a prick. It sounds like so much something that John would say. That last one was really good too. They didn't promote it. That's not something John would say too. Like, I just didn't promote it. So I know what he showed up. I guess I'm going to go with the owner as a prick. What say you, Vic? I'm going to go the last one one they didn't promote it guy Hannah. What do you think? I Was thinking the last one too? Okay Producer Chris I'm gonna go with that long list of everything awful about

All right, Missy Bees and with C. So all right, let's find out I'm in I could fucking I can sell my place now and I can move to Arkansas. And the girls and nice, everyone's cool. And the shows were awesome. As opposed to the El Paso show, you know, I I was sick as a dog in El Paso. That's what I came down and we did the podcast. Royce and I almost killed ourselves.

But you almost killed ourselves, but Kill each other you almost killed me. Yeah, but not really I do that shit all the time I don't know frankly the clip. Yeah, yeah You should play the clip I aim my car at Royce and then fucking but I think I turned into last minute You know I wouldn't hit you I move I love you too much. I move I was gonna have everything you own. I was so close. Yeah, I know. I know.

I didn't move. You fucking laughed the whole time. Because I think you're insane. Of course. You got to be insane. I just stand up. That's all for this week. Come back next week to find out if you are man enough

to catch a doubt word that classic bit of almost hitting someone with a car. I know I love these times you get a martial amp out of it. I can't walk anymore but I always get your martial amp. Happy days. So this game is starting to get anti-chomatic. It's climatic? Sure, something. Because it's the most boring answer. I thought about that when he said that, I was sick as a dog,

I was probably that one. And no one picked it, cause it's such a boring thing. I have like, Cardiff's answer is better. I like what Cardiff cause I was, I think those are funny other things that John says. I guess it's my point.

What do I know though? Just a dumb guy. Hehehe. Hehehe. Hehehe. Alright, what have we done today? We've done it all. Pat Oates was here for a minute. We talked about the beauty of. We talked about Stuttering John. We had the new Stinkline man. Oh yeah. Parody saw from Mr. Magenta. We got into Chad Zuma. Got some new Stinger. New Stinger. Yeah, Tony Muskrat, Cardiff Electric,

sending us a new Stingers for us. We tried to catch a dabble, we all failed miserably, but you know what that means. It's time for everyone's favorite part of the show. Long chance, Rich. Rich, Rich, Rich, Rich, Rich. The team. The team.

The team. Rich, Rich, Rich, Rich. You know what this is, Chris? Oh, yeah. This is the part of the show where we play a clip from the podcast that we'll be reviewing on the next show. Do you get people excited about the next show that we're going to do? Because I need to be excited about it.

I want you to be excited about it. Vic doesn't seem that excited, but maybe this will do it. Take a Under It was all written on the piano Finally got me to cry on the air. It's the first time ever wow It's all written on the piano and all the little intros and the big jungle land intro I wrote it all on the piano Howard Stewart went back into the studio Not only do you leave me his house for dinner parties, he went into the studio for Bruce Brickstein and cried on the air.

Did you notice how he goes? I teared up during that song. Bruce Lee Gannon want to talk about that. Anyway, moving past that, please. We're going to think about Howard Stern. I got the prime time Alex, 99 coming on the show on Wednesday. He'll be on on Thursday.

And we're going to get into Howard Stern going back into the studio. On Wednesday, it'll be on on Thursday, and we're gonna get into Howard Stern going back into the studio. I can't imagine how neurotic I am, I'm listening to you. I can't even imagine. He must be freaking out. I do know, because Jim and Sam were bitching about it, that no one was allowed to be in the lobby of the building.

Yeah. Did we talk about this on this show? No, I'm just, that checks out. Yeah. Yeah. They literally this on this show? No, I'm just, that checks out. Yeah. They literally had to clear out the entire, no, think about building in Manhattan. How busy a lobby is. Like you need to be in the lobby

before you go upstairs and check in and all the different things people are in a lobby for. I mean, the list goes out. Yeah, lobbying. If this fucking asshole Howard Stern says, I got to clear out the entire lobby before I will go in and sit on my throne and listen to Bruce Springsteen play his piano song that I cry it out. Yeah, soul to the earth that guy. He really is something else.

So that's going to be a lot of fun. All right, coming up, we've got to get caught up on reviews. So that's gonna happen when we got some voice mails. But please join us again next time. It might be the episode we find out once and for all. Who are these podcasts? Sleep well, everybody. The party in the mush this of morning radio. I'm now the show these clothes right now.

Hmm. Okay. Great show. Good job, everybody. Great job, everyone. Internet news with Lucy Tightbox. Regarding Chad Zumaq's stand-up, we go to Reddit and Roscoe 577 has us rolling out of the gate with the Boston Marathon had a more enjoyable bomb in. Bitter Brian, Carl.

I'm done with Chad Zumaq. Also, Carl, I'm, Carl. I'm done with Chad Zuma. Also, Carl, I'm dedicating the next four episodes to Chad Zuma. Dr. Steve suggests, next WATP event should be at the Boko Black Box. Terrible ad knows how to get under certain people's skin with. I like how Jen said almost nothing the whole time, but still managed to sneak in one of the best singers of the show. She's coming for your crown producer, Chris. MOX knows how to ask questions certain people don't want to ask with. What the fuck was that audio during Net News, Carl?

And regarding Episode 357, high-low with M.Rata, Least Bag kicks it off with, what a bunch of boring ass cunts. There was also the podcast they reviewed. Baldrousel speaks volumes with that Tom Sawyer's Stuttio parody song was the best. And so does a real blue falcon, holy fuck that roast was bad. Deeply unprincipled opines, fantastic show. I have waited years for WATP to cover the Chad roast, but I have a big gripe, sir. You are disrespecting the Smiths, the greatest fan of the 80s. Ooh, if I was a

fightin' man, Wabio Dunks, I get the feeling that if you were a fightin' man, you wouldn't think so highly of the Smiths. Jizz Rad writes, Chrissy is the kid who got yelled at by a teacher once and has had a grudge for 40 years. But Crogor fan 88 with the D. Yeah, she's right about teachers. And from YouTube, we get comments about our Stern leaves the house video. West Harris. It's hilarious, and it's always been hilarious anytime Howard tries to get how us little people live our lives. Raging Cookie. I'd love some more Howard segments, a bit of Howard, a bit of OP, a bit of Stuttering John.

It's like having different flavors of ice cream, but it's different types of delusion, and I like the variety. Matthew Marklund, we need more ragging on Howard. So many of us fans feel so shafted by him. And Nicholas M plays us out with, I mean, it's one banana Michael. What could it cost? $10? Howard Stern.

an Anna Michael, what could it cost $10? Howard Stern. So admittedly, I could have popped in the net news and post on top of everyone talking while we were doing the net news, and people would have been able to hear it. And I should have done that. Because I thought about it after the fact, I'm like, oh yeah, that was really annoying. Well, okay, this is why I didn't.

Now I'm remembering. I didn't go back and listen to that audio at all. I could tell. Oh, I meant to count 10 hours, we got, should to do. So I just, you know, I made sure I had all the levels right and I mixed it and I fucking uploaded it and then I listened back and I was like, oh shit. It whoops.

Is this the apology segment of the show? Sorry, please. Sorry, it looks you tight-fax. I should have cleaned that up. Well, it's funny because people don't realize that I end the show, but I'm not really ending the show. So I'm like, all right, thanks everybody. See ya, and everyone gets up and just immediately starts talking.

Right, it makes me, and I'm like, what did I get my fuck? Whatever, give me a shot. So I guess that's not me. And then someone root feed me. Yeah, you need three excuses to get through this one. Yeah, it's everyone's fault for nine. All right. We have any new reviews to go through? You got a couple. Okay, good. Take it away. We'll start off with a torture by Chowderkeg. He said, show is so excrush eating it forced me to rat out Charlie M. I don't know what is your time? I don't

rob it. Is that a five-star? That is. Okay cool. I was hoping you would understand it. Yeah. Who the fuck is Charlie M? I don't know, but that's good, okay. Chowder Cag is a funny name. All right, what else we got? Hannah? All right, I'll do one. This is by Jeves Kat. It's called podcast.

Really fun to hear an outsider take on podcasts I like. Host are kind of hard to like, but maybe they're just not my vibe. For all the complaining about how much you hate listening to other podcasts, I guess y'all found a niche. Not for me, but Meta Podcast talk is an underrepresented genre, so. Wow, that's something taking it very seriously. This is my job. I don't take it that seriously. I know, okay. Cool. I'm guessing that's like a three star, two star, baby. Two. Two.

Two. Two. One, two. I'm confused. That's an interesting life that person lives. That they checked out the show and they're like, I can see why people would like this. It's not for me.

I've only went and wrote a whole review of gave it to stars. Who would do that? It'll waste a fucking time. Yeah. Anyway, move it on. What else we can? This next one is Total Loser by Southern Yankee. He said, if it wasn't for Southern John,

this nerdy virgin would be making ASMR videos in his mom's basement. It's pretty good. Nerdy, for. You're laughing a little too hard for us to create a good band name. too hard for us to create. It's a good band name. We open for nerd to hell in the end.

Is that a five-star help, Vic? Yeah. I fucking... You're on a practice. We haven't had a review segment in a minute. I know. Anything else to handle? Do you have another one? Yeah, I'll do another one. I don't think... Stop me if I've, if we've done this one, but I don't think we have. Okay. This is called one of the best modern comedy podcasts by Black Gay Lesbian.

I definitely have not heard that before. Okay. It doesn't ring a bell. Well, thank God for these guys. Update, they touch me down there. Be careful with the one with the one eye. Read that again. Yeah, one more time. Yeah, if it one of the best modern comedy podcasts, thank God for these guys. Update, they touched me down there. Be careful with the one with one eye. Why am I so confused with these reviews today the guy was what I Did a dick joke like Mike's blind Mike guys

The Is that a five-star review Anna it? It's a five-star review. Very good. Thank you very much. Before I play the voicemails, I want to promote Vic as a big appearance this weekend on Simpcast with Chrissy Mayer. Hey, what time is that on Sunday night?

Oh, fuck. I know it's late. Like eight or nine probably, right? I think eight to 12. She does four hours. Yeah, so you're gonna be on the whole time We'll see because I work the next day. Okay, we're doing more military stuff Will you be playing strip poker on the show? Is that something that happens? Yeah, I'll suggest it to Chrissy. We'll get that happens Something that happens. Yeah, I'll suggest it to Chrissy. We'll get that happens. No, it's exactly what happens

All right, I know everyone's disappointed in Vic and their manager right now including myself But we should still support her and watch her on Chrissy mayor show Simcast I've done that show before that those gals are a lot of fun Let's get an update from Gary from San Diego. I'm Southern John if anyone's gonna know what's going on with Southern John It's gonna from Gary from San Diego. I'm Suttering John if anyone's gonna know what's going on with Suttering John It's gonna be Gary from San Diego Hey Carl Gary from San Diego Well, everybody's wondering where the hell is Stuttering John So I figured I'd grab the bull by the horns trying to find them

I got through to Benny loco in the high desert. They said, hey, Benny is the substitute teaching. Is the under arrest? Is the in rehab? What the hell's going on? Her answer, her definitive answer? Your guess is as good as mine. I don't think she knows either. And she's severing John's best friend. And only. So what are we gonna do? Where is he? Where is severing John? Holy shit, it's a mystery. Yeah, it's a mystery for the eight where the world is. Yeah. Even Gary San Diego, can't find Saturday jobs. Hey, that's good. See? Yeah. All right. Hey, that's good. I hope you get the reaction I do stand up someday. Hey, that's good.

All right. Do you remember when I was doing my Australian thing? How could I predict? I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. If you're going to do the, you can all that enough, at least follow it up with I say you've played 90s Spoonie before. Kill yourself, Vincent's fan. Get stuck yourself.

Come on. Alright, fair enough. I deserve that. That one I deserve, Sarah. Thank you very much for that. Alright. Bukhaki Queen is back. Oh my God. Carl, it's the Bukhaki Queen. I just wanted to call and

make sure you heard the amazing news that there is a new BQ variant of COVID. It's super contagious and easily spreadable. Fuck you, Carl. All right, well, I hope that the Buckeye Queen does not get the BQ variant of COVID. We're all rooting for you over here. All right, somebody calls in and fucks up their phone, Carl. Hey, this is Chad Zuma. You need to tell that bitch. No, no, never mind. I've fucked that up. All right, let's try it again though.

Let's see if you can get it this time. This is Chad Zuma fuck me okay I really is Chad yeah don't see my dad he gets set it up all right maybe the third time will be the child here let's see Carl Carl Carl

Carl Chad Zuma Carl Chadzoumach. You had Christie on the show and you pronounce it Jeff, it stands for graphic interface of something not graphic interface. I mean she's so stupid. This is why you don't this is why you're not cool Carl You don't have a cool crew you're not cool, Carl.

You don't have a cool crew. You should hang out with my crew, because we're cool. That's true, that is true. So, Chrissy did pronounce it Jeff. I will say the inventor of the Jeff pronounces it Jeff. Even though we've all decided it's Jeff, which makes more sense to me,

but the guy who invented it says it's pronounced Jeff. So I'll take either answer But thanks, Chad Make sure three phone calls to get that figured out for us. I appreciate it My name is Carl I had to bring this clip up like 14 D.P. That means Deciple, oh man, that is that audio engineer kid means decibel. Oh man, that audio engineer has typically fired. Oh, I'm calling. I know all these cool fucking little thought cuts for audio things. Fuck it nerd. I forgot sometimes I sound like an idiot. Thank you for reminding reissarate much appreciated.

Hey Carl, this is animal that I keep forgetting you do ten in the morning. Saturday fucking savage. But I have a legit question. Like people always are ragged about what is just going here? What do you associate? Like entertaining like dick. because they're entertaining. Like Dick, he gets a bunch of weird characters like the guns or Digi-Bro or some autistic guy from Australia, like he has interesting characters

on the shows, like the Howard Sternapodgas. You go there to do that. You rag on weird people and people that can't do a podcast and you see how they react. That's interesting. Anthony Coomy has got Gino and what you have was like react. That's interesting. Anthony Cooley has got Gino and you boy, you have a, because it's hilarious. Come on, Pat Jekson punched him in the face,

it's fucking funny. This is a pretty good gag. So why does Kevin Brennan like keep Chad Zumak around? I was listening to the last episode and I didn't realize like, oh, we only know Chad because Kevin Brennan keeps it like, oh, we only know Chad because Kim Brim keeps it like, why? Like, what's the, I just don't get it.

Hell, I am burger. Did the answer his own question there? It sounded like it. Yeah, I understand what you have idiots on your show, but why does this guy have that idiot? I don't know. I think you just answered that. I think you nailed it.

Go back to page one. I think you nailed it. He's like, why is Vic out there all the time? I'm like, yes. Kidding, Vic, we love you. Of course. I'm excited for your blossoming career. No, not even a little bit.

It's so much work. There's no way. The mission of work. Can I just say this? There's no way the Navy would know or care about topless picks on a Patreon somewhere. I am saying this is all Mr. Vic got involved with wait what are we doing? You should have gone to a different photographer don't ask him to

take the shots. Get your who's your gay friend that you hang out with? Oh he's in Florida now he's a Florida gay man now. All right, we'll tell him to take a trip up. Right. See how the solutions got it, Chris. This is what I do. I saw problems. I saw problems. Hannah, what's going on with you? We haven't seen you in a week or two.

What's new in your world? Not much. I've just been working a lot and I've had to be out of town to go see shows, but we won't go there because people probably still have PTSD from the woman's event, but yeah, so I've been either gone or just working really late every day. So Vic is now doing other people's shows, she's becoming a celebrity,

all because she talked about eating ass. Hannah, have you learned from this? Is there anything you want to tell us about what you've been up to in the last week or two? Um, are you trying to ask me if I've been eating a lot of ass? It's a right sound, it would. I have not been eating a lot of ass.

God damn it, I do. Yes, assing. I'm eating aww. I get it. I get it. I get it. I get it. I get it.

I get it. I get it. I get it. I get it. I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww

I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww

I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww I'm eating awww Why? Yeah, I don't know what it was. It definitely seemed like a Wi-Fi thing. I like that he said he said a Wi-Fi dead zone. It doesn't even exist. That doesn't even mean anything.

What do you mean a Wi-Fi? What do you mean a Wi-Fi doesn't work? Either there's whatever. I'm not gonna get it. It's a Carl Tuck talk. I'm shooting. All right. But it's either there was a Carl Tuck talk.

Everyone loves that. You're so good with technology, Carl. I know. You can shoot other people's stuff. I told him to be explaining to people how to do this kind of thing. God damn it. At least to people how to do this kind of thing. God dammit. At least I didn't embarrass myself in front of Vic

at the live show in New York. At least it was just Anthony and Missy and... Yeah, but nobody said. No, I am gonna be going to the Philly show whenever that is. Okay, cool. I don't even care. I just love Dick so much. Awesome. He's a good boy. There's a nice though. I am so recording. That's good. Carl, do you roughly know when the

Philly show will be? I'm shooting for April 1st, but I don't know if the venue is going to be available yet. I have to figure that out. Okay. It'll hopefully be the first or the second weekend of April because the 15th we have a show so I can't go to fill in that weekend. Oh yeah. And it's also Anthony Jesselneck will be in town. Oh I thought that's what you were talking about. No the ice tubs are playing the 15th. I fucked them.

This is so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. The ice tubs are so great. I One sound great without you and me So we got this show either just the next coming to town and Vinny Paulino's featuring for Anthony jess on that's fucking dope or so he thinks

Like he gets so excited about these big shells Then they bring someone they're bringing someone like oh no actually we brought some Here's a t-shirt Oh wait what's that? Well for you it's a watchcloth but you get the bite Put a tops ad in post oh Shit I forgot to promote the Tobe Show. He's still can't. Don't forget the ice-telps are coming to your town flying by's in brewing. November 12th. You're gonna redo that.

Hey Buffalo, don't forget! The ice-telps are coming to your town. You're gonna redo that. Hey Buffalo, don't forget! The ice-telps are coming to your town. You're gonna redo that. Hey Buffalo, don't forget! The ice-telps are coming to your town. Hey Buffalo, don't forget! Flying Bison Brewing November 12th. You're gonna redo that.

Hey Buffalo, don't forget. You guys the tell us we're coming to your town November 12th at the Flying Bison Brewing place. Flying Bison Brewing. Yeah. Dennis, didn't they say something about how we get stage indoors? Yes.

Is that the last airbender thing? Flying bison? The flying bison? No, it's in Buffle. Everything in Buffle has to do with like Buffle and bison. Bison. Yeah. What do you say with a Z? Why do I say with a Z? Because I can't talk. I don't talk. Wow. The bike you just figured is out now. I guess so. I love it. People aren't going to look on BICN. They just lost respect for you. I don't pronounce words correctly. You try talking with these teeth.

I have them. All right. Well, that was not fun anymore. Okay. No, it's not. No, it's not being fun for you to cry. Sorry. I had enough it's not me. Now it's not me. It's not me.

I'm not producing Chris. Sorry. I had enough of all of you. Thank you both for joining us today. Of course. I'd like to see you. I'd like to see you. I'd like to see you.

I'd like to see you. Send me a better picture. Send me a better picture. Send me a better picture. I still like the one I sent you. I'll post that one. It's funny. It is funny.

And oh, it's gross. But I'll post that one. It's disgusting. It's so disgusting I know I don't like where you pulled that anyway But send me another one and honestly is Mr. Vick on the patreon No, exactly You don't I'm saying Mr. Vick is on our patreon, so it'll be our secret wink wink I want him bring it up on the show I hope you bring it up on the show you'll be fine. Oh fantastic. All right later The isotope hey Buffalo

Buffalo the isotope so November 12th at flying bison brewing November 12th 6 p.m. 6 to 9 You go into the severs game that night don't come see us flying by is in brewing. November 12th 6 p.m. 6 to 9. You go to the Savers game that night, don't come see us.