Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep48 - The Anna and Susannah Show

Episode Date: February 6, 2017

It's Super Bowl week and WATP upped the testosterone by reviewing a show with two female hosts called The Anna and Susannah Show.  These are a couple of funny ladies who joke about pregnancies and other things that probably don't need to be joked about.  Oh, did we mention they are also super religious... because that's fun too.  Kevin and Karl have fun with some ecards and Shaq stops by.  It's a hoot, people. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello and welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts. I'm Kevin. And I'm Carl. And we listen to podcasts so you don't have to. We want to remind our listeners you get to visit us on WhoAreThese.com, our Facebook page, or on Twitter at Who Are These Pod. We're always looking for new podcast suggestions, so leave us a comment or post a death threat. Today we'll be reviewing a show called The Anna and Susanna Show.

As always, we have listened to this episode separately. We have not discussed it with each other beforehand, so without further ado, let's find out once and for all who are these podcasts. It's show time. W-A-T-P everybody! W-A-T-P everybody. W-A-T-P. We want to welcome our new listeners who came over from the Anna and Susanna show in Travis out. Yeah, we share a lot of the same audience, I'm pretty sure.

Well, as soon as they find out that we have this connection with Anna and Susanna, I think we're going to get a pretty big listenership from that. Yeah, we're going to get like a three listener spike. Watch out. I got eyes. Apple won't be able to handle it. They'll be like, oh my god. What's what's going on with your Q1 earnings? Well, you know, we our iPhone sales are down and then we had that server outage due to WATPs download rate So that didn't help legs Yeah, so

This week we did the Anna and Susanna's show as you had mentioned and This is two two girls talking to each other Essentially, other ladies. Yeah, one one more wave or southern the other. Essentially. Two Southern ladies. Yeah, one more wave or Southern than the other. It sounded like, but. Well, do you mean how far South they actually live or just how? How much of a draw she has.

A Sunday sound. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the thing is, because she says at one point that she's 35 years old, but she sounds like she's 75 because of that. It's fucking that accent that draw is like so. It's wildly unattractive and yet she's the attractive one on the show.

Oh, weird. Yeah. Why don't we play some clips so people know what we're talking about? All right. Do you have, do you have something loaded up there? Sure I do. Here's something.

Here's some good witty banter between the two hosts. What do you have in it too? Just busy, busy, busy, a lot of riding, a lot of running around. That doesn't sound good, does it running around? Yeah, I will. Just live-in-life, ball games, schoolwork, homework, extracurriculars, Bible studies, yada, yada, yada, yada. Lots of busyness. Yeah. But it's good. It's good. If I wasn't busy, I'd be complaining that I was bored, I guess, wouldn't I? No.

It's very richer. This is your dad. A busy busy busy. Just go on to sit another squirrel. So I guess we'll be eating tonight. Go on the ball games. I just real busy talking about, you know, pregnancies with my podcast co-host here in bacon cakes, using lots of butter in those cakes? And now we should, we should remind people if you didn't hear our podcast from last week and we teased this episode, don't, subject matter is walking through big disappointments. I'm not sure why you walk through them, but that's what it's called. So life's biggest disappointment. So they talk about how this woman can't get

pregnant for about 40 minutes. Yeah, it's, oh boy, it's, it's a hard listen. It really is. It's, it's tough. It's tough to get through. Yeah. They're talking about miscarriages and oh I think I have I think I have a clip of that. Oh, okay Well, how about track 11 I I got to tell you Kevin. I don't know if this hits you the way it hit me I thought this was a pretty inappropriate reaction to the statement and Just like you know I had miscarried. Um, two and a half years ago. I took that laughter, which is a real part of the show. And just I sewed it because it's so over the top. There's nothing fun or funny being said in the show. But these two women sure do laugh a

lot. Yeah, I have a, uh, geez, hey, just, there's just so like, many historical parts are when they're like laughing hysterically that don't really make any sense. So there's nothing that warrants that kind of reaction. Yeah, here she's telling a story telling a story here about being in a car with her friend and hearing the wrong lyrics. So let's listen to this little gem. I was in the car with one of my girlfriends and the 90s was playing for 80s. I don't remember what era this is in, but she's like, oh is scary and I go wait wait wait wait wait did you just say this is scary she's like yeah it's not the lyrics I was like I was like the song is

I'm pretty sure the song is even called voices carry this is scary I'm like what scary oh gosh I grabbed the same part because it doesn't get funnier The reason she keeps saying over again it just laughs harder and harder each time this is scary That's a little bit ricks and I was like? Because you know, I'm a weirdy woman. So, I took a knife from that. Point my eyes so of weight, whoa, whoa, wait. I don't like those fucking Sesame Street free dudes. Yeah, there's a lot of just nonsense. I grabbed that same clip and I called it recounting an extremely boring anecdote because if you were there in the car with these two and one that's happened, you'd be bored out of your

mind and now she's telling it out on podcast. Yeah, well not to mention the fact that voices carry is about like a child abuse or something so I'm like it's a pretty heavy song from 40 years ago You know it would be more entertaining that they like picked like a song that a lot of people get wrong. Like, you know, RIVDA, Black Adouche, you know, like that. That kind of you know, one that might be funny, but to pick on whatever voices carry whoever hell does that song is, I don't know, it just doesn't, it doesn doesn't warrant the gut reaction laughter that she had over it. But there's another, oh god. I was gonna say there's another, this is the beginning.

So they're both authors. We should, I guess, mention that because they talk about it a little bit in here. One is, one I guess is self-published and the other is in the midst of getting an agent to be published, but they're writing books about having kids or some shit like that. But, all right, listen to this, because this is very deuce, God. It's very deuce chilly.

Yeah. hot. It's very, it's very doust chilly. I had a really good week. Good. And I'll tell you why. It's because I landed my dream New York agent. Ding ding ding ding. We have some Yeah, I'll be very sure That's wonderful What are forms so proud for you? So the thing that hold on Just let just let that sit for a minute. Let's just let that sit there very little dead air All right, all right now we're good. God Okay. Alright. Alright. Now we're good. Go ahead. Let me start out. I'm gonna just fucking unpack that whole clip. So she gets to the point where she's like,

I don't know how that fits. Yeah, in my head I just, yeah, in my head, I just, I'm a mitch, like I, I picture a cartoon wolf, like with his eyes popping out of him and said like, boogah! It was heart-like pounding. Yeah, that's right, right? It has nothing to do with getting an agent in New York. And then she proceeds to go on and sing the beginning of celebrate celebration, which is that whole thing. She does that, but she has to make sure that she says it's a celebration after that.

As if no one would know what the fuck she was trying to do during that. So that whole thing made my balls shrink smaller than they normally would be in the mornings here the crisp mornings in Arizona Right, I'm still looking for my testicles after that part. It was I tried to climb inside myself. I was so embarrassed Oh, shit One thing that you should never do on a podcast and let this be a lesson for podcast here's out there if you don't want us to review your show. Don't leave an open ended question laying out there because we will fill in the blanks.

I have, there was an open ended question. I put together my top three answers. It's kind of like a David Letterman thing. My top three answers, I want you to play, what do people say to you three? This is the third best answer, count down to number one. What are things that people say to women like you who are dealing with infertility?

Oh, good for you. So that's the third most popular answer. Thank thank you Christian Bale. Yes, I'm glad he had phoned in for this one. He did. He did. That's that. That's what I want. What do people say to you? Uh, two, this is number two. Come at it. What are things that people say to women like you who are dealing with infertility? Oh geez, oh boy pulling an old Mel Gibson there Wow, he is very pissed off. He's still pissed off. She wasn't drinking all day. This guy is pissed off he's still pissed off. You must have been drinking all day this guy is. Yes.

Alright, the coveted number one. Number one everybody. What do people say to people who are suffering from infertility? Take it away. What are things that people say to women like you who are dealing with infertility? Just a chance for a smile and for a smile. infertility. Oh Mel Gibson takes the number two and number one spot, everybody. You know what he was the favorite, but we're still shocked. You can't even notice. Oh God, that's the best one of the best rants ever from a hysterical anti-Semitic person. I only wish that that happened while we were doing this podcast because that would have

been four episodes at a row. Just play the melody. Who are these? Who are these drunk Australians? Name of the show. So the other thing that's going on in this show, it's four Southern ladies, by Southern ladies, there's a lot of religion brought in. Oh, yeah.

Kevin, you and I, we've not tackled any religious podcasts. It's not really a realm that we want to delve into. People feel very strongly about their beliefs and their face and it's kind of shitty to just shit on someone for what they believe. But here we go. I have a track I want to play for you, number eight called Susanna Changes Her Prayer.

I really pray and my prayer changed from I want to get pregnant this month too. God you know I'm gonna this is your will you know you'll be done in this and if I have not had have not conceived in this coming year by the end of the year then I'm going to just kind of take that as a sign that it's time to release some control over this and kind of let it go. So, that's not how praying works.

She was explaining to God how she's going to wait 12 more months and keep praying for this, but if God doesn't answer a prayer of 12 months, that's just going to stop bugging him about it. Yeah. It's what she would say. And, Kevin, I do have a lot of thoughts on this whole prayer thing. Okay. I can't say it better than the great George Carlin. So just play this George Carlin clip and then we'll move on. And I say, fine, pray for anything you want. Pray for anything. But what about the divine plan?

Remember that? The divine plan. Long time ago God made a divine plan. He gave it a lot of thought. Decided it was a good plan, put it into practice. And for billions and billions of years, the divine plan has been doing just fine. Now you come along and pray for something. Well suppose the thing you want is an in God's divine plan. What do you want him to do? Change his plan. Just for you, then it seemed a little arrogant to divine plan. What's the use of being God if every rundown shrunk for the $2 prayer book and come along and fuck up your plan? And here's something else, another problem you might have. Suppose your prayers aren't answered.

What do you say? Well, it's God's will. But I will be done. Fine. But if it's God's will, he's going to do what he wants to anyway. Why the fuck bother praying in the first place? You see, like a big way to pray to me. Which is exactly my point, because these women even talk about how God works in mysterious ways, and we pray for things, instead of if you don't get them, but it actually works out well, because you shouldn't have gotten that anyway And it just all comes back to them. What the fuck is the point? Why are you wasting your time? I have some great examples I want to play real quick out of them all righty that seem to They don't work in parallels they they seem to

They don't work in parallels. They seem to disprove each other. Places whose anus ability to pray part one. Big dreams. Susanna, you have prayed for me along the way, so thank you so much for your prayers they worked. Absolutely. So this woman got that agent in New York City for writing a book, and she says Susanna, you prayed for me and it worked.

And then just a little while longer, place you've had his ability to pray part two. I had, you know, really prayed about, I've been praying farvantly about this for four and a half years. So I would say that she's not all that good at praying, then. Yeah, she's, she's as good as praying as she is as having kids. Right. Uh, boy, I don't know. The, the, the religion thing is such a weird thing. And

when they started, like she said at the first time, she's like, oh, I'm going to pray for you. And you know, whatever people throw that in. Sure. But it kept going and going. And they just kept bringing it up constantly. And I'm like, is this like a Christian podcast? whatever people throw that in. Sure. But it kept going and going. They just kept bringing it up constantly. And I'm like, is this like a Christian podcast? What are we listening to? I didn't realize it was going to be so... Well, speaking of a Christian podcast,

Play Track 9. I call it, oh, no, I call it, this is some idiotic thinking, holy shit. And the Bible Sarah had such great faith and she had a baby Because God promised her one and God has not come down to me on a cloud or in a vision and said Susanna You're gonna have a baby right another baby, but I have this desire in my heart so strongly to have a third child that I I believe that it it's ordained by God because I have prayed you know God if you're not gonna give me a child take this desire away And it's still as strong as it was you, when I was a kid that I want to have three children. So this is how dumb this woman is. She thinks she's going to have a kid because

if she still has the desire to have a kid, God wouldn't give her that desire if she wasn't able to do it. He would have taken it away. That's fucking crazy. Yeah. Well, you know, I have the desire to eat six pizzas at once. I've seen you do it. Yeah. Yeah. The desire and the will. And God willing to happen. Yeah, it's such a weird thing when you are faced with a religion when you're not expecting it. Like if I went into this knowing that it was going to be sort of religious, you know, a lot of praying about, you know, and miscarriages and all kinds of stuff, I don't know. I probably would have been like, let's do a different podcast, but...

Yeah. You know, I... I have been like, let's do a different podcast, but you know, I'm very... Yeah, that way. But then I thought about my own beliefs, you know, and my own kind of belief in the almighty... Oh, yeah, Zeno, exactly. And, you know, his... You know, I guess I feel like there's a reason why he was trapped inside of volcano.

The souls are everywhere. Everyone has their own. They're just souls trying to find their place. Well, it's the one true religion. I think we can all agree on that. I think so too. I say sometimes I pray to Mr. Cruz and I say, Mr. Cruz, if your will be done, we need another mission impossible movie.

And I hope and I pray that those things are heard and that he makes another one. And you know, what the hell, Vennel's Sky too. I might as well just throw that in there too. Hopefully he sees the wisdom in my prayers and he answers those. But I pray to to John Travolta that he'll just finally come out of the closet already and get over it. But that's not happening anytime soon in the pier. No, no, he's firmly inside. I think he's got the door, the door is welded closed. Yes. All right, I do want to get into a couple more clips and then we can move on about this faith and religion. I have a track on here that's called dummy doesn't understand how

faith works. Play track 12. The only thing that we really can have, whether you're a believer or not, is faith. Absolutely. Because otherwise you're just kind of clinging to gosh, I hope this happens. So faith actually works in the opposite way that this woman is thinking, she's saying that if you have faith, then things will happen for you. If you don't, then you're just hoping that they'll happen wrong. When you don't have faith, you make things happen. And this is a hilarious clip that ties into this play track 14.

I am in no way. I think adoption is a beautiful, beautiful thing. And that is on the table now. That is something that my husband and husband are praying about at this point. They're praying about adoption. You don't have to pray about adoption. Just go, just go do it. If you want to adopt a child, don't talk to God about it. He's not going to fucking do anything for ya. He'll fill out the paperwork for you. Exactly. He's like, Hey God, this is going to be be about 12 crank and I get a loan

Option thing That was the dumbest thing I've ever heard we're gonna pray about adoption. Well, you know I think God George Michael said it the best when he said I think he's got a song that refers to This topic right one of your sex Exactly. I want your sex. Exactly. Yeah, that's the song. And no, I think, maybe God can assist with an adoption. Maybe he'll, maybe it's just like a big bank.

Like you go in and you've got to ask for your loan and he's like, well, my child, isn't my God impression. Well, my child, uh, it's going to be 16.67 interest rate. That's your AP off of this. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah. Jesus. He says Jesus and then he points over and Jesus is like running a teller. He's like Jesus God is playing God Yeah, so you know the religious aspects aside this was a pretty shitty podcast to listen to because it was Kind of depressing, you know because they're talking about you know having miscarriages and stuff and

When I'm not gonna obviously, you know, because they're talking about, you know, having miscarriages and stuff. And when I'm not gonna, obviously, you know, sit here and make fun of somebody who's gone through that. Obviously, that's a pretty traumatic thing for a woman to go through and a guy to us, but you know, you have to go through that. I get it. It's not fun. But neither was this podcast because I just don't think.

This was a miscarriage of a podcast. Yes think this was a miscarriage of a podcast. Yes, it was a miscarriage of justice. It was tough for both the men and the women to deal with mentally, physically. Kevin, I have a clip. The show starts off a little bit awkwardly telling people to buckle up. It's almost like the last week when we were talking about hold on your hats. Here comes Carol and Kevin. It's just the dumbest thing to say. Play track one. Buckle up ladies. The show is coming up next. Buckle up buckles.

I Get a supper Caitlin Jenner Not a good driver that came in the buckle on Buckle up. Oh, geez. I Got a couple clips where there's just jokes that fall flat Oh good, and then that never happens on our show. So I don't know. I can't relate to this at all.

But here we go. I'm just wondering when if she calls a shisei, shisei am lounge or whatever you said. Right. When she's old enough to be in a wheelchair, where's she gonna call that? A wheelchair yet? Yeah, probably.

Oh. So they're talking about Mariah Carey. that a wheelchair yet yeah probably. So they're talking about Mariah Carey. They talk about Mariah Carey for a good 10 minutes. Yeah, yeah, start the show and Mariah's world or whatever their reality show is. And yeah, I had that same clip Kevin because you could tell she wrote that one down. She was gear it up. She's like, okay, so let me just set the premise here. She doesn't know how to call things, stop, right? All right, all right. So instead of a wheelchair, you know, if Norman Donald runs this show, it might be funny. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, she's like, it just talks about, you know, having a wheelchair there when she's that which is got a wheelchair what she can recall that uh... wheel chair that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that I got another bad joke example if you want to keep on this track. Yeah, yeah, let's let's go with that. Play track 13. I have spent enough on pregnancy tests about a fully loaded Kia. That's literally what I had to. Okay, because what I love about that joke is it's one of those exaggeration jokes.

I've spent so much money on this, I could have gotten a car. But a fucking Kia, like those exaggerations, you want to take it to that, like, you know, I could have gotten a Mercedes or a fully loaded Kia. Right. How much is that?

Like, $3,000? I'm not gonna buy that. As a Kia owner, I can tell you, as a base model Kia owner, I can tell you that, yeah, there's folks, there's folks's a guinea pig and I can't imagine it's that expensive They're over at not too bad. It's a guinea pig with a fupa

Yeah Yeah, I thought the same thing was was pretty funny. It's like it just maybe choose Now I don't know Lamborghini you know something that's yeah you know fully loaded and then add that that's the the embellishment you know like a fully loaded uh you know whatever not not the shittiest car that you can in the fully loaded model with the money aspect I could have gotten a use out of them. One of those fancy ones where you could store shit inside of it. Well, that is a nice out of it. Yeah, actually that is true.

All right, you got, I got a few more clips out here that I want to play. Okay, let's let's do it. All right, I got one that's called Hilarious Story. Play track 16. And she was like, now first one of the first things that you guys should just rub it, just rub the essential oils on the bottom of your feet. She realized that most of the people in the audience didn't have legs. What a story, Mark. I also had the same clip. Okay. And it's not the same.

Yeah. So she was doubled over a letter that there were a bunch of people with no wags. Yeah. I thought they got here. It's so with no wags. Yeah, it's so hypocritical in a way because it's like I spent all this time talking about God and having babies and shit and then she's like yeah, then yeah, she's talking to a room full of people but no legs. Oh my god. These fucking dumb war veterans got their legs shut off. Most of the total have limbs.

They have to limp to the VA hospital. God. They were in that pointless ward, Vietnam. Oh, I'm certain to take this woman sets a humor actually. I was going to double back at this one. Coming back around. Can we talk about when they intro the show they say that

you know I'm Anna from Ha Ha's for Hu Ha's and this is Susanna from Woe Susanna. Did you do any research as to what Ha Ha's for Hu Ha's is or? Well I didn't want that on my Google. I'm like I'm gonna share my history later. Yeah. All right, so Haas for Who Haas, the tagline is because funny women need a funny website. And oh, there is no fun to be had here. One of the things they specialize in is e-cards. Okay. You ready?

I got some fun e-cards. So these are things that you can send around for a good gag. There's one of a business woman. She's dressed up in her business suit. She's got her arms up. She's celebrating and it says, it's Friday. Let's go home and put on our sweats. What? That's the joke. That's the joke. Are you ready for another one?

Here we go. Yeah. Keep the last rolling. Here's one that just has a picture of clouds in the sky. And it says that there are two things I know for certain in this life. Number one, avocado is extra. And number two, I'm worth it. Oh My god, I

Mean that these aren't supposed to be funny, right there is supposed to be Inspirational or they're supposed to be funny listen to this one All right, if you tag me in that selfie where you look hot and I have eight gins. I'll freaking kill you Oh my God. This person does not run a joke. There's just not understanding how this works. These are actually put together by the Chinese folk who write fortune, fortune is for Chinese. Big zero sides.

Wow, that is some really horrible shit right there. I thought maybe they would be sort of funny, you know, just like not good, but these are not funny or good. They're... Ugh. I don't even know what to say. I'm completely flabbergasted with this entire experience of the show. Well, what this woman, Anna, is best known for,

is the fart that almost altered my destiny. This is her most popular post. And she's got graphics around it, and all sorts of things, driving people to this page. So I started reading this story about the fart that almost altered your destiny. It's mind-numbingly boring. But there was one thing where she says,

I was one SBD away from boiling his plans. Okay. Okay. And then in parentheses, that's silent, but deadly for you, prudes. Prudes? Yes, because, you know silent but deadly for you prudes. Prudes? Yes, because you know, if you're a pretty like, oh, SPD, well, I've never. Medical falls out of your face and you're like, that's SPD.

Oh, oh, I've never read something so violent in my life. Wait, you're so with your hand. I've got violent my life. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, mm-hmm. Oh, guys, watch out. I'm up to something. Oh, God. The SBD. So anyway, I just wanted to point out that these women who claim to be funny, self claim to be funny, are lacking in that department. Well, I don't know.

I'm holding out hope on these e-cards There might be a couple of diamonds in the rock. There's a holy room for improvement with these e-cards My lord, I was reading Ha ha for who ha the other day and oh I almost spilled my lemonade all over my lap. Oh! I think we should make our own e-cards. And it just says, fuck you! From my ADP. No, it should be like Mondays, don't you hate them?

That's one. And then the next one is something like vacation. I got a request vacation that's that's another Another one you can print that one down if you want Okay, okay, we take this off wide. I think we need to do some work right serving. Oh, all right Okay, so please start making this okay. I got I Got another one this this is a it's a picture of somebody going through the drive-through another one. This is, it's a picture of somebody going through the drive-through at Burger King, right? And they get their order and they look at their order and they go, I didn't order this.

Yeah, I think you should submit those to Ha Ha's for who? That last one I think is pretty good because it's got a whole new one. That one's pretty good. Yeah, no, it's, right. I didn't order this. Yeah, yeah, the drive-through right right pretty good. Yeah Kevin am I in one of the podcasts that we listen to? Consider this for your Consider this for your picture if you will picture if you think the podcast suck his co-host gets worse and worse as he does but the drive-through thing is good that's a good gag yeah work on that yeah I

have a I have a clip out here talking about the essential oils play track 15 The essential oil recommendations Sometimes are great, but some they they aren't Magic they're not magic check out the big brain on bread So these people are dumb so I have a clip out here. that's called the smartest person involved in this whole show. Point track 17. Is that I had a boyfriend for much. He was my boyfriend through much of my childhood. We grew up together. My first kiss, everything. And then once we were in our early 20s, we were engaged to be married. And he broke up with me. And the his reason for breaking up with me was really brutal but he's like well

when I close my eyes and I think about what I want my wife to look like and be like you're not it that guy is the smartest guy average like I'm engaged to this can retard you think she's funny Oh my god, this is Oh my god, here's another Another E card Okay, right, you want to hear it. You want to hear this one? All right, so I have another e-card. Okay, great. You want to hear this one?

All right, so it's a woman in an office, right? She's in a cubicle, and her coworker comes over, and she's like, the coffee maker's broken, and the lady just looks at the she she's like looks right at the camera or whatever and she's like i just can't function without coffee okay so i don't think you're interested in what it is i really describing a scenario there's a skit ball

well i'm just you know i'm doing exactly how they're doing them you know just just basic scenarios you you know, with... All right, Kevin, I got one for you. All right. So there's this woman, she's dressed up in a business suit. Yeah, and she's looking straight on. She's got a catty-cat little smirk on her face. And she says, today is the Monday-S Tuesday ever.

That's a real one from Ha Ha's for who I'm not making that up. Oh. Oh, I can't. These make Kathy. These make like Kathy strips look like fucking George Garland. He's outrageous compared to this. Here's a woman who says, I don't want to be rude, but if you burn popcorn at the office again, I'm afraid I'm going to have to get you fired. Wow. Watch out! Boy, that's a loose cannon.

That one. Yeah. How about this one? There's a girl in an office right in, she's like, by the copier, you know, and she turns to her coworker and says, the copier's broken again. Yep, and then what happens? Well, that's it. That's the joke.

Okay, I got one. I got one. You're going to like, so again, it's a woman in a business attire. She's got her, she's standing up with her legs crossed. She's kind of being fun and flirty. And it says, going back to work after the holidays, officially blows. Huh.

Okay. It's official, Kevin. It's official. All right, I could see where that one would be. Would be entertaining. All right, so let me see. I can come up with some more here because I think I I feel like I'm coming up with some gold here for for ha ha for who has or whatever the fuck that name of the place is This is me pretending I'm not bitter. I didn't get Columbus Day off

Columbus Day what. Columbus Day, what is, what the fuck, what's wrong with these people? What was the last time you had Columbus Day off? Yeah, that's it. Here's another one I got. Yeah, here's one. So it's like two people in an office, they're like looking at each other or whatever.

And one of them's like, hey, do you know what the date is? And the other one's like, yeah, it's February 3rd. And the other one's like, oh, I can't believe it's February already. And the other lady's like, the other lady goes, yeah, it's, it's, the other lady goes, wait, she goes, uh, it's black history month and the other lady's like, oh no. I don't think you're understanding how these cards work. Alright. I thought, you're like scripting a movie over there. It's just, it's just a, the old phrase is one thing.

It's the old conversation, exactly what it is. I'm actually cracking myself up. Oh, it's fucking dumb. All right. I got one. Okay. There's these two women, right? And they're standing by the water cooler at work.

Okay. And they're both wearing the exact same outfit. And it just says awkward. All right. Yeah, I like that one. That's good. Put that put on that in the key pile. Oh, hold on a second, Kevin. This is a good one. This is a little snarky e-card to send to someone. It's got this same woman who's in the business attire smiling, looking straight on and says, just a friendly reminder, my emails have a reply button. Yeah I like the other one better I like the awkward one better. Yeah yeah I think that one.

Look at what are you regardless with another one of your conversations. Alright let's see let's see what I can come up with here, all right? Okay, here's here's a new one. This is brand new, right? Yeah. So it's a girl and she's getting it out of a car and it's snowy out. And she's just wearing high heels. She doesn't have like snow boots on. And she just looks at the camera and she says, I can't even.

That's good. That actually that actually was pretty good. I'm going to have to says, I can't even. That's good. That actually, that actually was pretty exactly at. All right. Yeah. See, I took it to be a while, but I got, I got where there I go with them. Exactly right. Yeah. Kevin, I have a clip on here. It's number 18. it's called Garth Brooks is a moron. In the words of Minimuses Garth Brooks. Yeah, sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers. Exactly. I know. They even he has enough sense to know that and he's a moron What what's the saying Kevin? That's like the pot calling Shaqial black

black. Broke some more. This is me. This is me. This is you. Chikki. O'Neil. What'd you mean by that pot? Yeah. I want you to buy a general insurance because no one nobody beats the general. Holy shit. Can we talk about that? I forgot about it. There's three sponsors on this God awful podcast. It starts up with Geico and then there's a Staples commercial And it's a very impressive get on board with this. Yeah insurance loves this show We just clip And off the radio and playing on our as that what they're doing. There's no way they have sponsors, right? They're on block talk radio or whatever whatever which is kind of like a big podcast

network so I don't know this be sure kill or kneel and I hate to show and I choose add in to Zana they're a couple of dumb bitches like them. Let's see what kind of topical e-cards we have here. Hey I have another one Facebook all right let's see what kind of topical e-cards we have here. Hey, I have another one. Facebook, all right. Let's see what kind of Facebook e-cards we can come up with. Okay.

You have one? Yeah. Life is too short to feel shame over what trending topics you click on in Facebook, forgive yourself. Yeah, it's hilarious. I have one it is okay, so it's like the old the other style so it's the girl and She's coming out of the women's room and it just says my pussy itches I love it. It's going right. I think it's relatable, you know, women can relate to it. It's kind of, it's not uh, here's this old woman I've been following.

And, uh, remember, this is a, uh, Facebook meme. So she's saying, I'm sorry, but I'll no longer be giving you lives on Candy Crush. I can't support this addiction any longer. Hm. Yeah. We all been there, though. I mean, you know, it's like, it's like, it's like instead of, you know, it had been a heroin addict, this person's playing Candy Crush too much, you know?

Yeah. So it's funny because it's not, it's not heroin, you know, Candy Crush. Right. Well, addiction is, addiction is hilarious. I mean, we all know that. I mean, you can't, oh, D. I'm Candy Crush, you know? Well, I beg to differ. I think that you probably could. You want to hear the tagline for their e-card, Kevin? Yes, I do. Well, it's not the best e-card I've ever received, but I guess it's not the worst. Hmm. I hate the whole fucking snarky attitude of this website. This website blog. I really think they should put my pussy-itches one up there. I think...

I think you should put my pussy itches one up there. I think I think you should submit that. Yeah. If you're a listener to WATP, I want you to go to Ha Ha's for Hu Ha's and please submit some of these ideas. Kevin will forget. He's pretty authorgic. Yeah. He doesn't motivate easily. So we're gonna need you guys to submit some of these ideas and hopefully we can get published on such an amazing website. Yeah, or you know, we could just start our own e-cards on our WETP site too, you know, I could come up with some witty ones. Can I sign up for that please? I'd like to not be associated with that. No, okay, but I'm not possible. We can keep that shit to yourself.

Okay, but I'm not possible. You keep that shit to yourself. Um, I'm gonna think of some more by the end of the show. So did you have any more clips to you? What did I play for this charming show that we listened to? There's a part where she's talking about a book. She says there's a great book called The Battle Plan for prayers where you write down all of your prayers. She wrote a book that told her to write down all of your prayers.

She wrote a book that told her to write down prayers. Kevin, maybe we should be writing books. Yeah. It's called Sit Down on Chairs. That sounds like my kind of book. No. Laydown on couches. Come and help, soon. Sitting onairs by Kevin

It's a book of my life. It's my I have some more class but I'm done with this. I'm moving on All right, are you good? I'm you know, I think I'm good. I'm gonna come up with some more e-cards I think okay, and the next week or so and we do now we're e-carders. Yeah, yeah, we're a couple of e-cards Oh geez All right, so This has been a lot of fun not listening to the podcast but making fun of it definitely made up for all that time I spent listening to it. Yes, and I have good news Kevin. Oh, yeah, what's what's that dude? We're gonna do this again Oh really?

Real soon maybe not next week. I'm gonna be in New York City, but we're gonna do this again real soon. Oh, okay and You know we now have a little Bumper that went to play before we play next week's teaser Yeah, you know what that means everybody is sad to listen to a clip from the show we'll be reviewing next week and Kevin go ahead and play next week's teaser. Hello and welcome to the most positive podcast on the planet. Hey beautiful, it's all about love, happiness and beauty, inner beauty and outer beauty. It's about life's journeys, yours and a little bit of balance.

But mostly it's about sharing positive, fun, uplifting stories and advice. Hey beautiful, beautiful it for you Kevin this is a show called hey beautiful really Positive podcast available Well, I can't wait for this one. I need some positivity. Yeah, we're being we're being asshole So it's it is about time to be get some positivity. Yeah, we're being we're being assholes. So it's about time to get some positivity. I agree. So this is a show called Watch Your Words

from November 30th, 2016. It's about nine minutes long. So I'm going to go ahead and throw it out there, Kevin, listen to as many of these as you want to or or can stomach. Okay. I don't think you can put these things down like you can't pizza, but maybe you can get a few. Well, I have quite a bit of stomach that I can handle with these, I think. Hey, Carl.

Yeah, I have another E-card. So this one is two so it's like, it's two women, right there, like eating lunch or whatever. And the one is coming back from the bathroom, right? And she says to the other one, she goes, I didn't think Vinny Gret would give you the shits. But I guess it did though, right?

Yeah, that's, yeah. I was like, it did though right yeah that's yeah You like that one it's it's pretty good. I got to say Kevin you're hitting your stride right now All right good. I don't want to stop you because I feel like you're you're coming up with gold Well, I'll keep working on them all right because Because I mean, it's all you can always improve. There's always room to grow and to get better. Well, here's one, Kamala. All right, so this is one that you put up on Facebook for all your friends to use at.

Probably get some loves, some likes, some ha ha's. So this is just a woman, kind of deadpan looking at the camera and it says every time you check in at the gym on Facebook, it reminds me to cancel my membership since I haven't gone in six months. Thanks for the reminder. Well, that's a worthy one. I like it. Wow. It's it's worthy, but man, I really packs a punch. Yeah, that's I can so relate to that. I'm like, oh my god, I got to cancel my gym membership. I'm a lazy cunt That's a good one. I like that a lazy cunt It's good

That's got potential. Go ahead. You could take that one. You can put it on your new website there cool cool Here's another one I got it's okay. So it's it's two girls their They're sitting at it like a table, they're eating, and the other one just says to her, and then she, then he tried to fit it in my ass. So it's like dot, dot, dot. Like there was like a vision before that. Yeah, and the other girl like the other cartoon girl

has a really big eyes. Like she's like really surprised by that revelation right right okay yeah I think it had like a nice callback celebrate oh boy so please everybody join us again next week because it might be the episode we find out once and for all. Who are these podcasts1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1.1. You know, who are these? Podcasts. I don't know. I don't get it.

Makes no sense. I don't get it. It makes no sense.