Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep489 - Bombing Run Game Show

Episode Date: January 28, 2024

This week we’re checking out a stand up comedy game show. It’s shocking how bad people can be at telling jokes but still do it on the internet. Of course, Tom Myers is featured heavily on this show but I’m even more excited to introduce WATP listeners to Kristine Knowlton. She’s the female version of Tom Myers if Tom Myers were somehow dumber. Dr. Steve is back on the show to define C and F words. Then we find out how Bobby Lee manages his money and I’m predicting this will end well. Tookie has a surprise appearance and we check out Leslie Jones on Club Random with Bill Maher talking about how brilliant she is. Then Stuttering John is victory lapping all over the place, he somehow won the Dabbleverse this week. Also, Cardiff comes on with a new game of To Poke A Dabbler, Kindy with reviews, and your voicemails. Come see us live on March 22nd – http://watplive.com/ https://www.doctorsteve.com/ https://tookiesoup.com/ Support us, get bonus episodes, Vic and Hannah pics, and watch live every Saturday and most Wednesdays: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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or visit connexontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Have you heard Tuky do Carl? I know he says he can't do Carl. Oh, bullshit, check this out. I know Tuky, I'm a fucking loser. I'm a fucking loser. No, that's Carl.

It sounds like rock to me. I don't know why that's me, but... That is really good. Yeah. I don't know, T's Carl. No, it sounds like Rocco to me. I don't know why that's me, but... That is really good. I don't know, Tukio. So that's you doing you. Fucking loser. I know. I'm going to actually be doing Jim Norton doing me during one of those scenes. Oh, wow.

Got your fluids? Yes. I want John to see me sipping from a glass. Look how he drinks tea. Meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep And now let's go through a little lesson on what really is a loser. So what defines a loser then? Episode 49. I'm a loser. Are you a boner guy?

Oh, I was a boner guy. You know what I misspeen? What are you talking about? I'm the one who should apologize. By the way, for those people that are in the back, remember to shut the fuck up. That's the gayest thing I've ever heard in my entire life. Shut the fuck up, ass wipe and suck my cock. Cuzz.

Cuzz a roo. Cuzz a roo. Slapperoony. It's showtime. W A T P W A T P. Hello, Robert X Couserous and bag nappers and welcome to another episode of Warthys Podcast. The only show that helps you fall asleep when you need an app. I'm your host, Carl. With me today, he's the Grim Reaper

with a slightly better bedside manner from Weird Medicine. It's Dr. Steve. Thank you, my friend. Glad to be here. Thanks for being here, Dr. Steve. Please. Good to see you both.

Go to WhoAreThese.com. Get our email address, voicemail number, link to the subreddit, link to our Discord server, link to our merchandise, link to our YouTube channel, and the link to Patreon and Supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month tomorrow. Yes.

By the time you hear this show, it might already be out. We are finally finishing up. Easy for you to say it's gonna be bittersweet. Yeah, I've enjoyed this book so much. Yeah, I'm gonna keep enjoying it long after. I think so too. I think we'll revisit it probably. To start over again.

Yeah. I mean, we can start over again with just different people going through the chapters with us. I think it'll revisit it probably to start over again. Yeah, I mean we can start over again with just different people Go into the chapters with us. I think it might be fun But either way we're gonna finally complete that two keys gonna be on the show producer Chris Sunday noon Eastern times you want to watch it live if you're on our patreon supercast or if you're a YouTube member You can sign up become a YouTube member and you get all the links in the community tab on our YouTube page For all the shows that the community tab on our YouTube page for all the shows that are behind the paywall.

Please come see us live in the Tampa Clearwater area of Florida on Friday, March 22nd. Dr. Steve's gonna be there. I will. See how excited he is guys? I'm very excited. Spoken with confidence. All right.

I liked that I was joking. I go, let's kill the mood. We gotta start the show. And I literally, Dr. Steve just like lost all his energies like, oh, I was joking. I go let's kill the mood because start the show and I literally that receive just like lost all his energies like We were yucking it up having all this fun. I just like She's like Cocktail starts drinking prune juice

It's my ammo. I just ruin every show W ATP live calm is where you want to go to get the tickets. Also a link on our website who are these dot com and you can go there and pick out your seats. I haven't checked in a little while but there were not many seats left that were the the front rows of the theater. But hop on that now get good seats. They're assigned seating in there. And we can't wait to see everybody down in Florida.

I gotta figure out my schedule. People are asking me when we're going down, when we're coming back. Usually I like to get in a couple of days before the show. Usually I come in on Wednesday. Yeah, we have to. Get there, B and B, get it on. By groceries.

Yeah, get some groceries, get that all figured out. Probably do a meetup thing on Thursday night. And then do we fly back Saturday or Sunday? That's the question. Monday. Or Monday. Fuck it. All right, we'll figure it out. I gotta figure that out.

So, but. Yeah, it all depends on if we have a pool or not. So, let's figure that out. Interesting, interesting. Okay. So, if there's a pool, we stay for the week. Yes. I see.

Okay. Well, make your plans March 22nd in Largo, Florida. Also, we encourage our listeners to give us a five-star review on Apple Podcast and the shit over us in the comments section. Today, we'll be reviewing Bombing Run Game Show. This was a suggestion from Jay and the Discord. We have both listened separately. We've not discussed it with you beforehand.

Let's get into it. This is a show hosted by A-Aron. And I'm going to go ahead and start things off because there are two brutal jokes right out of the gate by A-Aaron and I'm gonna go ahead and start things off because there are two brutal jokes right out of the gate on this particular episode that I was checking out. Okay, so let's please welcome our mysterious comedian, Judge for the night, Judge O'Style, everybody!

Judge O'Style! Yes, I found him behind a Macy's going through the dumpster trying to find something to wear tonight. But they say they're a comedian. They are a comedian. Don't worry, they are a comedian, but they're always a mysterious comedian judge, so they don't get chased down the catwalk.

All right. Oh, fuck is going on right now? Okay, so what this is, it's some type of game show where comics get up and do three or five minute sets, and then somehow there's a fake judge and they decide who wins at the end of it. And I cannot believe how many people humiliate themselves on YouTube thinking that they're a standup comic and you see these same people all over on these zoom comedy shows legion of zoom or the fuck they call it and um here's the lineup for this particular episode that i was checking out contestant number one yes sir i am paul whitney duty from beautiful but hot Scottsdale, Arizona

All right He's holding an accordion. He's holding an accordion. Yes. Okay. What else we got today? Meekabatten number two Oh, I remember that asshole. Yes. I was going to say, the Nashville show, where we picked out one of these Tom Meyer Zoom comedy showcase things. The caveman guy who doesn't speak English, but has a white beard. That works in comedy. Yeah, no, it's great.

This make noises fucking one bit wonder. All right. Oh my God. Now, community combat number three These community combatants will be doing If you guys don't know Blind Mike discovered Christine Nolton and we've been playing some of her stuff on Who Are These Socials.

She is as bad as Tom Myers. I was gonna say worse, but that would be incorrect. That would not be possible. Yeah, that's hard to pull off. She's as bad as, she's the female version of Tom Myers. And speaking of which, Steve, you were checking out a different episode of our program. That's right.

Do you have a clip that sums up the show for you or anything that you want to share first? Oh, well, sure. Season 4, Episode 1 of The Bombing Run, which, by the way, the show could not be more aptly named. Correct. If you could just play my number one, I think that gets things going. I'm Tom Myers, and I'm from the city where I am the most popular entertainment figure right after anything involving drug dealers and John Waters, Baltimore, Maryland. Yeah, tell me that!

Comedian combatants, please remember, do not say the F or C word or Freddie the F bomb. The bomb is set. You know, if by F or C word, he means funny or comedy, doesn't everything worry about that. You don't have to worry about any of that. It's the fucking thing I'm ever seeing. Sure. It'd be funny if it was like, oh, Edwards are cool?

All right. Yeah, I can do that. Yeah, the hard J. No problem at all. The hard J. Well, Tom has a joke about the N word later on. We could go to it if you want. It's number four.

Oh, yeah. It's a good one since you brought up the N word. I want to point out that this one is called dog fight. And it's just two comics. Mine was three comics. This was just two comics because they're both previous winners. Tom Myers has won this show before. Which is okay.

We got to see the one that he won because I wanna see the person that will... He beat out Caveman? Oh, shit. Lost the talk. But I live in kind of a rural area, so I am kind of like Seinfeld in that I too have a weird, crazy, wacky neighbor

who when he gets flustered, gets mad, and yells the N-word. Yeah, he yells no every time Tom tries to talk to him. What's interesting about that is that there is something there that you could make funny. Sure. It's not a bad preface. You know, I also, I'm just like,

whatever the fuck he said. It could be funny, but he just cannot find a way to make it happen. He sucks the funny out of it. Yes, he finds a way. He finds a way, like even making fun of Kramer's just the easiest thing ever and he ruins it. Well, he compares himself way like even making fun of Kramer's just the easiest thing ever and oh, yeah He ruins it. Well, he compares himself to Seinfeld. I mean, I guess I'm on a little roll here

It's if you do number three, it's always fun watching Tom compare himself to someone who's infinitely more successful than he is Great to be here. I live in a magical little place called Maryland where the voters here just recently I live in a magical little place called Maryland where the voters here just recently Legalized weed weed is now legal in Maryland and that's great because that means the competition will drive down the price of heroin People often ask me to describe me I'm like, you know, I'm just a normal guy and I do shows like this either live or on zoom two three or four times a week Basically, I'm like Seinfeld but with herpes It's more like Seinfeld with cancerous AIDS I mean, let me do a

Seinfeld with the purulent secretions Seinfeld with the purulent secretions More like Seinfeld with Flaccid Peroni's disease that that would be a lack of two messens Carl weird medicine Well in my own head I hear Jim Norton's impression of me. Right. That would be funny, actually, now that you've mentioned it. Is Jim around? Can you call him and see if he wants to hop on the...

Well, Jim, you want to tell those jokes? Okay. Fuck off. Speaking of Jim Norton, play number five, then. Oh, yeah. They want to open a Dollar General in my neighborhood, and all my neighbors are against it. They have signs on their lawn that say no dollar general keep us rural Because anybody ever been to a dollar general

Like a dollar general makes the waffle house look like roots Chris steakhouse We've been talking about this cadence for a while. Yeah, and I think I found it I found you don't Oz? Take a seat my friend. Hello. What's up man? Take a seat. Yeah Jimmy lost a lot of weight. Just go to the gym, just go to the gym and eating better.

Just go to the gym, just going to the gym and eating butter. I think I got nervous. He's going to the gym. You've got a job at eating, but he got fucking good. One of the greatest things I've run up. We had to the gym, Norton worships Ozzy. Ozzy comes in and Jim's so nervous that he immediately embarrasses himself.

Just go to the gym and eat and that's a. Yeah. A lot of people pointed out the similarities between that and Tom Myers delivery. I want to ask about this joke though, because the joke says Dollar General makes the waffle house look like Ruth's Chris Steakhouse. You got to compare something else. You can't just say the Dollar General makes something look like something. What does that mean? How does that work? I don't understand it. It's not a joke. You got to compare something else. You can't just say the dollar general makes something look like something. What does that mean? How does that work?

I don't understand it. It's not a joke. They sound like jokes, but they're not jokes. It sounds like it could be a joke, I guess. Why not? Okay, speaking of sounding like jokes, I want to introduce you guys to Paul Whitney, that man that we saw with the accordion

when we were being introduced. Paul Whitney, everybody. Paul Whitney, everybody. Yeah. Go Paul. What a crappy world it is. Well except for Mr. Pulse plays. Well except for Mr. Pulse plays. Hey everybody, welcome to Mr. Pulse plays. Oh my god.

He can't play the accordion or sing, but he decided to open with those two things. Did you notice, so when you play an accordion, You play chords. you play chords, you play chords. He's not playing with the left hand at all. And the right hand's playing the same. The names. Yeah, that's a chordian. Yeah, it's good point. Sing a note McGee over here. Trying to play along with the melody. And it's louder than him. Yeah, I know I couldn't even make out what the fuck he was doing. Okay, maybe it gets better guys. Let's see where he goes. Let's see the next joke for I like to vision

What a kitchen would be with a bunch of washed up musicians? or in first case Serial killers Every dober do on Sesame Street. I Think he'd seen this. Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes, head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes, eyes and ears and mouth and nose.

I hate your head, shoulders, knees and toes. Yeah! It's better than fatty panty. Well, I'll give you that. I was just thinking that this guy probably is a substitute teacher. He probably is, yup. Oh, great. What's his fucking name again, Mr. Whitney?

Oh, Mr. Whitney's here. Did he bring his fucking accordion? Oh, they brought all the instruments. Oh, shit. Is it too late to be sick? How about that set up there? He goes, what would it be like of a whole kitchen full of musicians, but actually not musicians, serial killers, but actually not serial killers, Jeffrey Dahmer.

Just start there. Yeah. Why are we getting doing that? OK, let's find out why he's doing that, because now he's going to start talking about musicians. And this is Jim Morrison. Ha ha ha ha. Then Morrison from the doors. What if he was doing that? Oh that's the other one. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha From the dollar

What if he was doing a thing about fire predicting me before future scouts I'm on a call. I got to go. Go, Hitler, Kurchif on fire. Oh, no. No. I'm not saying anyone watches this show, but wouldn't you rehearse a little bit? A little bit.

Think of what the chords are before you start going into your songs that you're going to do, your little routine? I think he did. He rehearsed in the mirror and he's cracking himself up so much. He's like, I gotta save this for the show. I gotta, yeah, I gotta. This is gold. I'm gonna nail it. I don't have to worry about any of this. He must have inherited that accordion. Those things are not cheap until not how to play it.

Yeah. Yeah. It's a- He's not funny enough for it to be a prop, you know. Anyway. You guys remember we did the holiday song parody contest and Ben Hilton won with a really good Bruce Springsteen impression. Yes. Well, guess who else has an amazing Bruce Springsteen impression That's right. Paul Whitney

Good, you know what Bruce Springsteen is on tour right now So not many people know he's kind of washed up and he's I don't even think he said Bruce Springsteen is on Tur right now, but not maybe he would know he's kinda washed up and he's I don't even think he said Bruce Springsteen correctly, but he also said Tur. Let's hear that again. Let's hear this. I think he's nervous. Oh. Cause you know what?

Bruce Springsteen is on Tur right now, but not maybe he would know he's kinda washed up and he's actually doing kids music. Like, five little monkeys. Alright. Five little monkeys. Five little monkeys. All right. Proud. Five little monkeys. Five little monkeys. Five little monkeys.

Five little monkeys. Let's jump. Five little monkeys jumping on a bed. All right. Everyone close your eyes. Because this is why you don't think it's Bruce Springsteen because you're looking at him. But close your eyes and you'll think we're listening to

Bruce right here. One fell off and a bumped his head. Mama called a doctor and the doctor said, no more monkeys jumping out of bed and there were four little monkeys. Four little monkeys. Yes, born in the USA it has repetitive at five little monkeys. Bawling monkeys. Yes, born in the USA it is repetitive at five little monkeys. Wait, that's what he was doing?

Was born in the USA? I didn't even get that. I left that in there because I also didn't recognize what soggy was doing. I had no idea. It really sucked. And he's getting laughs from someone. Well, he borrowed Tom Myers' panel, I think. A lot of polite laughter going on in this. After this, he does lettered panel, I think. A lot of point laughter going on in this.

After this, he does Leonard Skinner. And I'll, I will make that you guys sit through that. I had to sit through it. He does all of Freebird. I could imagine. I will spare you guys that. I'll go back to Dr. C. What did you pick up on from your episode?

Oh, well, let's do number six. There's two in a row that make me wonder about Tom a little bit. Sex robots are a thing now. Like, I don't get that. I find it enough trouble having sex with a human. Yeah, he says human rather than woman. I'm starting to wonder if Tom has had the pleasure either way, to be honest.

But number seven really kind of. You know what I'm having sex with human people? either way to be honest, but number seven having sex with human people. You guys do that too. Right. Sounds like Tommy from MSC. What's it like? Try number seven because this one really locks in that idea. If I were to have sex with a machine, though, it would have to be my panini press because I'd love the idea to have sex with a machine though, it would have to be my panini press because

I'd love the idea that having sex with something that by definition has to make a sandwich for you afterwards. I mean, of all the appliances to fuck, he picks a panini press. It's basically a George Foreman grill. I'm really wondering if Tom knows what sex is. Oh, you're gonna put your penis in it? Oh, well, never mind that. How it picks up the difference.

Also, why not a garbage disposer? At least it's got a hole in it. This guy's never had sex. Because he goes, I'm gonna fuck so I was gonna make me a sandwich afterwards. Nobody has an aftersuck sandwich. You have a cigarette or a nap. Speak for yourself.

Anyways, that would you make yourself a roast beef after that? Whatever, no. Someone makes it for me. Yeah. There's nothing to have intercourse with on a panini press. I mean, I know I'm being a little too literal, but it's ridiculous. It's better than a blunder. I'll give him that.

I mean, maybe, maybe he does understand. Let's go to his closing joke. Tom knows how to close a set. I saw this thing on Facebook recently where it listed serial killers and their astrological signs and there was no Aquarius on there I was born in late January. So that makes me an Aquarius. So that puts a lot of pressure on me to be the first That's my time, thank you so much everyone It's time for his birthday

So much everyone boy. It's time. I was birthday. That's what I wanted to point out. That's that's the main. Goddamn sound boards tonight. That's the main takeaway here guys. Wish Tommy a happy birthday. Yeah. Oh, he's got a couldn't shoehorn in a Zodiac killer joke. No. No. Okay. I mean, literally the first thought that came into his mind when he was staring at Facebook is like, that's a joke. That's my closer. He's like, Paul Whitney, I got this.

All right. No need to be heard. All right. You guys are saying, all right, Tom's not very good. Paul Whitney is not very good. What about this guy, Ed Smith, who plays Oog Son of Ag, the caveman? I bet he's got some good bets here. All right. Up next, the stage of our second community combat. The caveman. I bet he's got some good bits here.

Alright, up next on stage is our second community combatant. Please welcome Ed Smythe, everybody! Woo! Woo! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, uh, uh. Uh, wham, wham, wham. Wachu, guchu, guchi. Wham, wham, wham. Nah, nah, nah. OK, that's what the audience is saying.

If you're listening to the show, and you're wondering why this is funny, trust me, it's not. It doesn't matter if you see the visual element or not. It's best you don't. It doesn't help. No. That makes it worse. So that was a 40-second bit that he did, where he just went, oh, nah, ding, bah, me, bah, like, whatever So that was a 42nd bit that he did where he just went

Oh, no, I think Bob me like whatever. I don't know what the fuck he's doing But do you understand what the narrative was of that was he talking that yeah, I mean he's Son of a I'm not a woman and I'm not a baby. That's the long that's it Okay, I thought he was trying to say he wasn't to have sex with a woman because she would get pregnant or something. Oh, that also could be the case. Well, that ain't going to happen. I think he said his pullout game was weak and that's why. Yeah.

So the caveman also has a musical instrument. He also has a prop, which is a trend on this particular episode. And so he busts out his harmonica. Oh, good. And what's great is that he's got that noise canceling software going on. The one that's supposed to get background noise out of that. It takes on harmonicas. It takes out that harmonica. Okay, come on out. This is fun Now it's funny. You know. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, All right, now I know what you guys are thinking. Prop comedy is the highest form of comedy and I agree with you. And so does caveman guy when he busts out the dolls here. I just want to get me a bonus. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I heard that Kyle doesn't like your jokes. He's an idiot. So what's crazy is that this is a show that just came out last year. And after both of those sets you just saw, the host goes, Hey, we're going to be fine. Yeah. And social media both mentioned their Facebook page. I know. What? Okay. Fine. Good enough.

So now I'm excited to introduce the WATP audience to Christine Knowlton. Christine Knowlton is one of the least attractive people I've ever seen in my life. She's fat and ugly and her personality matches that. It's impressive. What? What do you mean this style is prehistoric? I forgot that he tries to ad-lib there. How could you forget that? Sorry. What do you mean his style is prehistoric?

How is that a joke? What do you mean his style is prehistoric? the Thank you. Thank you. Everyone. It's so great to be here. Oh my gosh. It's so trippy. Right. I have to start out with the story. So the other day I left at chickens for about two hours. I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. That's where my mind was going. Come with me on this chicken journey if you will. Not gonna lie. I've seen the chicken bit before. She did it at another another show a zoom comedy show with Tom Myers that we looked at did a kill I heard these socials. It wasn't great. Oh, okay, but maybe she'll do a better job this time familiar with her famous chicken bit Steve no, but I'm sure if she's done another show is that she's perfected it Yes, she's awesome this time correct. This is this is gonna be great

to that. Yes, she's awesome this time. Correct. This is going to be great. She looks very well. Let me set the scene. OK, these chickens were chilling out in the grass, maybe 20 to 30 feet away from a place that sold chicken. You know, like rotisserie pulled the dead kind, right? Mm hmm. At first I thought, you know, I should call them, tell them a couple chickens, you know, got out and they escaped, right? But then I was like, no, let them tell them a couple chickens, you know got out the escape right, but then I was like no Let them go on a little chicken adventure. I'm gonna pause it. I'm sorry. She is so nervous The way she's delivering this she's gulping when she's hoping to get laughs the dead kind so anyway

Chicken adventure she might have chicken in her throat And I'm thinking the conversation was going like this. Like, we made it Vern. I haven't ran my little chicken legs in so long. I sure hope he doesn't check out our coop. But let's set out on a whirlwind adventure. We could call it chicken fest and go meet other chickens. We could call it yes chicken fest. That's where we go But first we have to figure out how to cross the road. What was that old story? Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but I don't think it ends well

She just told up Yeah, go on why did the chicken cross the road joke? Well, she doesn't understand what the joke is, because she's going, oh, look at that dwell. It's very neutral, actually. All of her teeth are separated from each other. It's very annoying. Hey, we don't talk about teeth on this show, Steve. I sent you the checklist of things that are acceptable.

Yeah. You can't talk about mandolins, naps, teeth. Naps, mandolins, right. Mommy. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Go over ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Let's go on an adventure and we'll call it chicken fest. Now, that sounds like a festival. Not an adventure. I don't like to take a trip and call it Carl Palooza. It doesn't make any fucking sense.

You're the marketer. Well, that's a good point. That's a very good point. All right, I can tell that you guys are enthralled with this. Let's keep it going. Let's see where she's going. This is a long bet. I have to, to unfortunately tell you.

Why hello is my beak on? But all I could think of was sweet chicken freedom, right? Just breast freely roaming around. Okay, I think they called it the 70s, but it's due for comeback. It really is. But I do like chickens a lot. In fact, one time I got high and... One time you got high? One time! Come on! This dude is fucking corny! In fact, one time I got high and I stole a rotisserie chicken. That's a punchline. That was a punchline. Well, that's right. What's a prize?

That's the punchline. That was the punchline. Well, it's better than a ninja blunder. Yeah, get rid of that. But all right, let's see where she's going with that setup. Because now we're off the chicken adventure. Hopefully we'll get back to it, but right now we're off the chicken adventure.

Chicken fest is canceled. This is a little tangent that we're going on. Yep, that's right. That's right. I made it into a song. And I called it my emotional support rotisserie chicken that I stole. I really hope that there's some jokes in this because the other guys' songs didn't have any jokes in them. So I really hope she's got something. All right. Let's see. Sometimes we all get high.

Sometimes we get high and go shopping. Sometimes we shop on Amazon. Sometimes we shop how to store. They should never put frotisserie chickens by the door. Where you can pick one up and just take home. I mean, she... Okay, it's just in the wrong era. The Gong show would have loved this act.

Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, Chuck Barris would have been all over this. She would have been on every third week. They would have put a paper bag over her head. Are you the unknown comic? No, you're just ugly. There was a time when musical comedians actually were musicians and knew how to play their instruments. That's true. Yeah, I could point. This is bizarre. And that instrument, what is that? It's an electric ukulele or something and she doesn't have plugged in.

And of course, she's singing about stealing food and singing about food. I'm not why I would have been surprised about that. Yeah, good point. And also, I like that she sets up, you know, sometimes I get high. She doesn't have to floss though. And then I steal rotisserie chicken and here's a song about it. And she sings everything that she already said.

I was like, okay, I do that. Okay, let's see where else she's going with this. My emotional support rotisserie chicken. That's not a song. Oh, come on, like you don't do dumb stuff when you're high. Somehow her wig has a bad haircut, too. That's the worst. Well, at least she's showing some cleavage.

Yeah. There's that. Plus one. And he never got a boner again. A couple more verses, guys. It's painful. I got feared. I got scared and guys, it's pain. Oh no. I got feared.

I got scared and feared for the worst. What I ever be able to return to the start. I had to think of something fast, so I made a name. My emotional support rotisserie chicken that I stole I kept the chicken close to me Well in the fridge where it belongs I'm kinky but not into Salmonella Salmonella is a very hard word to sing

Don't worry it's- Singing is also hard for you. Jesus Christ. Salmonella. Salmonella is a very hard word to sing. Don't worry it's dead. Cause you should never keep alive on in the fridge

My emotional support rotisserie chicken and a stall They said so good Oh wait was I not supposed to eat it? I had to get rid of the evidence somehow My emotional support rotisserie chicken that I stole. I'm breaking it home now mostly because I stole it. My emotional support rotisserie chicken that I stole. This has been your chicken chat. She timed herself for the three minutes that she had

and her alarm starts going off. Like why would you have that on while you're performing? Sleep because I stole it. My emotional support registry, chicken that I stole. And this has been your chicken chat. I've been Christine Nolton. Thank you so much for having me. All right. Let's get it up for Christine Nolton, everybody. Christine Nolton, everyone.

One more time for. Sorry, I want to announce my final appearance on W. A. T. P. No shit. Understood. Brutal. Well, of course, the question everyone's asking right now, where can we find her on social media? She has an answer for us.

Where can we find her on social media? You can find me on LinkedIn at Christine.nulton. So you were close. She brought up her LinkedIn. We're the fighter, but hold on a second, because the host is all over this. Don't worry, we got this. LinkedIn?

LinkedIn. LinkedIn. Oh my God, I got this. Okay. LinkedIn. LinkedIn. Link tree. Oh my God. I've got my chickens and my trees. Link tree at Christine.nulton. I know what you guys are wondering. Who won? We just saw three amazing comics. Paul Whitney, Oog Son of Ag and Christine Nulton. We know that we lost. Who is the winner of those?

I don't know who the Joker Ace is. Joker Ace for Game Number Two. Oh yeah, I mean I know the answer obviously. Oh you do, okay. We got pulled the fucking clip, what do you mean? Ha ha ha ha. Do you not know how this works? No I do.

I just confirm in Cardiff's hypothesis that you cheat on all the, all the games. You know all the answers. Well yeah, that's what I do. I just confirm in Cardiff's hypothesis that you cheat on all the, all the games. You know all the answers. Right. Well, yes, this one I did. I would say Christine probably won this one. That would be my guess. Interesting.

Producer Chris? Tom Myers. To poke a dabbler. No, Tom Myers wasn't on this one. Tom wasn't on this one. This is Paul Whitney. That's why he won. That's why he didn't know that.

He won by not being there. From once. Two inches. Paul Whitney, everybody. Woo. Yeah. Woo. I did it.

Paul Whitney won. How bad would you feel? This guy didn't know the chords to his songs, didn't know the weirors couldn't sing the melodies correctly. They weren't funny or good in any single way. He was the winner in this. Everybody stay tuned for dogfight edition right after this. None of these people are well.

No, this is not good. This is on the internet and they're okay with that. It's the funniest pawl up in the tumor. I remember back, baby. Weird medicine. It's here in 6-Hop. Yeah. All right.

Diatracee, what about the other comic that was at? I only pulled one clip from him because he was just so boring. I was hoping that you had pulled some, but I had number two was just this guy and what he, you know, comics who used to go on radio shows like opiate and Anthony, they didn't like him if they just started doing their materials, you know, doing their act. Well, check this out. This is crazy. All right. So like I mentioned, I live in New Jersey. Anybody else here from Jersey? New Jersey? Yeah.

He's doing the crowd work. Yeah, you probably don't want to do the crowd work part of your act while you're at the Zoom meeting. He's got three minutes. Anyone, anyone? Jersey? That's all I got. Stuttering, John's, did you prepare is more accomplished than that. Yeah, so I have another bit from this guy from Ryan Patrick. He's just straight up doing his open mic set.

Doesn't worry about the fact there's no people there watching him to interact with. Some of you are looking at me like, what the heck is this guy talking about? But there's like one or two of you that are like, heck yeah, brother. Family films first, alright. Everybody involved is a retard. Yes, I know. It's insane. What did you think was gonna happen here? I was hoping this would happen. Wow. Yeah, I like a train wreck too.

This worked out pretty well. All right, so now the big question is who won between Ryan Patrick doing his crowd work and Tom Myers? And I want to give a big round of applause to our judge judge ohmatic who I forgot to put quarters in the computer so I could get the results wait one moment oh wait oh no I don't need to put quarters in thank goodness who I was gonna have to go get some change I had to go to the 7-eleven guys. It was gonna take a little bit He's pretending to talk to someone Interacting with him in some way it's not happening

But no, I know who is the winner the top, the ace of aces of bombing run dogfight edition. And it is Tom Myers everybody. Tom Myers. Hey. That's exciting. It is exciting. I'm proud of you for him.

He's our buffoon, so I was rooting for him. I was rooting for him as well. But again, I got to imagine Ryan Patrick has to eat a bullet later this day when he loses to Tom Myers. He got to rethink everything you've done in your life. Oh, they're all zooming in. No one's in the same room, right? Yeah, okay. Correct. Because could you imagine losing the Tom and being in the same room when he comes over and he's like, yeah, you know, you got good stuff, but what you got to do is...

Oh, you know me. Immediately give me advice. Don't do your crud work when you're on Zoom. I used to do that the first four or five years. I was on Zoom too, but I've learned. And I'm still on Zoom. You got to go right to the jokes of that stuff. All right.

That's enough of that show. I think we've covered it properly. It's time for our fringe of the week. Chris. And today's cringe of the week comes in from my buddy Christian Blatt fresh off his interview with Jackie, the joke man, Martling Christian Blatt is on fire right now. You can see that on the, who are these podcasts?

YouTube channel, who are these broadcasters? This is Bobby Lee being interviewed. This is on TikTok. I guess it's been going around a little bit. But this is an interesting way to live your life. How much do you make? I don't know. You don't know?

You gotta have an idea. I don't have an idea. It's like a ballpark. Can we guess? No, I'll tell you why I don't know. I've never asked. Who do you got to have an idea. I don't have an idea like a ballpark. Can we guess? No, I'll tell you why I don't know I've never asked. Oh, who do you have to ask? I have a got money guy and I spoon I first signed them 50 years 15 years ago. I go I Don't want to know How much money I have I don't want to I don't want to live in a life in a world where I'm like always looking at my bank account worried and this and that

So, um, yeah, I don't know the only problem is how much does he take he takes? in a world where I'm like always looking at my bank account worried and this and that. So I don't know. The only problem is how much does he take? He takes 2%. Of your income? Of your income? No, he has no idea how much money he makes, how much money he has. And he thinks his money guy is taking 2%.

Fast forward two years from now with his a giant lawsuit and Bobby Lee is broke Did you have multiple clients then millions not like a really credible ones. So how does it work? I work with Kevin Bacon, it's a legit. Okay, cool. Yes. I'd be up. He's a very powerful money guy I'm saying hey, could I afford this today or like if you spend too much He's like, hey, you gotta cut back on the spendings. No, I call them like, I called them five days ago and I said, I'm thinking about buying a new car. And she said, all right, go ahead.

You curious? No. Is there anything you want to buy? Because the number is really low. I'll just be depressed and I'll start panicking. Sure. I need to do more, right? But if you don't know, then you just kind of just,

I just live my life. OK. Like I asked my money guy, I go, go you know how long can I not work you know I mean until I run out of money yeah he goes a long long time so you can go a long long time without specific can you just ballpark it for me I don't need to know exactly really long really really fine you know I mean so just ballpark it for me? I don't need to know exactly. Really long. Really, really. Fine, you know what I mean? So just as long as I end up out of fun, okay.

I don't know what I pay for my mortgage. I don't know what I pay for my car. I don't know what insurance costs. I don't know what my lighting, light utility costs. I don't know, all that's taken care of. Every bill? Every bill. I've never, I don't even know where to,

phone bill, I don't even know where to go to do it. VerizonWireless.cap. That know where to go to do what Verizon wireless comm Is that crazy doctor Steve it's crazy I Get the sense that things are gonna end badly with this relationship Can I buy a car and I say I go ahead? Doesn't matter. You're broke. No, sir Wow, that's that's something else I have a special treat for us. I wasn't expecting this today, but Tuki is here every one

Hello nap taker. Hello soul SoulTaker and Hello, BreathTaker. All right, Tuki. He knows the rules as well. There's no, you can't make fun of Naps on this show. That is the specific rules that I gave everyone. I'll give you another chance too. Just because you don't have a pink comforter. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That's better. Guys, we were talking recently about what an asshole Leslie Jones is when she was on with Bobby Lee. And we learned a lot about how she big times everyone. She acts like she's underappreciated. She's this superstar comic.

It doesn't get the respect she deserves. What offended me the most is who forgets to pay someone back. Right. She borrowed tons of money from all these different people when she was an up and comer in LA. And then someone had to tell her, hey, now that you have money, she probably pay those people back. She went, oh, oh, I forgot.

Really? That's what people do. They pay back people who want the money. So you don't forget. No, you don't. So she was on Bill Mar's show, Club Random. Not too long ago. I thought I would check that out.

I always like Bill Mar and the way that he interviews guests and we're off to a bad start. You got all dressed up for me? Yes. Oh, thank you. What a pleasure to meet you. How you doing? We've met a couple of times actually. I was drunk. There's nothing worse than, hey, it's a pleasure to meet you. We've hung out multiple times.

So I was like, oh, that was a great answer, though. I was drunk. I'm going to remember that. I'm making my business to not remember anything. Oh, that was you. Oh, I thought it was a different seven foot top black woman. It was way too obnoxious. I had a guy, one of my co-residents

when I was in residency in 1986, loaned me $280. Wake up, Tuki, wake up. And I have never forgotten that I never paid him back, but I never forgot that I never paid him back. At least you know about it. Yeah, right. This bullshit. You don't borrow thousands of dollars from somebody and forget.

Anyway, I wouldn't think so, but but she did for some reason. To Tuki, are you holding your breath? Are you OK, man? What? Oh, OK. Breathe through his nose. I didn't know what you were doing. Am I really like really loud or something? No, no, no. You're not even talking. What do you mean?

I thought I thought you could even be breathing or something. Your mouth wasn't moving. Chris was making a joke. Never mind. I thought you need to be breathing or something. Your mouth wasn't moving. Chris was anyway making a joke. Never mind. I thought Dr. C was putting to sleep there with the story. That's why I was answering. Very boring. Very, very boring. Fuck off.

15 second story. And it went on and on and on. OK, so Bill, they're talking about how, you know, Bill's always drinking and smoking weed on these shows and Leslie doesn't drink but she's smoking up and This is an interesting little tidbit about people as they age. Yeah I very rarely I save my liquor for when you really want to drink For like this. I mean, I could only really only have a few drinks a week and so I save it for like club random

People don't understand it when you get older that is a real thing. Well, otherwise you'll just look horrible You just look fucked up. Yeah Yes, especially me No, you look at no because you look great, but but the whiter you are the worst Wow No, because you look great, but but the wider you are the worse. Wow. That's a brilliant observation. As you get older, you can't drink your face off every day because you'll look terrible if you do. Sounds like a wager to me.

This is a woman he's talking to. Well, Jerry's out of that one. I'm not exactly sure. So I just thought that was an interesting observation because as we'll be seeing at a little bit, a 58-year-old who still drinks every single day is now looking great these days. So maybe you should cut back on the alcohol consumption as you get older. So now they're talking about how weed's legal everywhere now and it's great. They used to travel around with weed when it wasn't legal and Leslie tells an anecdote about a time she got busted in Canada with weed

Canada where we in the security line what oh on my birthday cuz like oh No, dude the day before 9-11. Oh, could you believe that happened on her birthday? I can't believe that she would get busted for a week again on her birthday. Like that's. Departure. That's brutal. Yeah. And Bill seems so concerned.

He's like, Oh yeah. I know he's lighting up. He was very concerned. Right. All right. So Bill Maher's talking about some old movie that he hates, that people like and he thinks sucks. And he's got a pretty good line here and it gets nothing from Wasley. I mean, I, my view was I could swallow a can of Kodak and puke up a better movie.

This she's just like, yep. Swallow a can of Kodak and puke up a better movie. Kodak does make you puke. That was pretty good. What do I know? All right. So this is great because there's a subplot to this episode. There's a spider.

There's a spider here as they're doing the show. And Leslie gets very distracted. I knew I wanted to be a comedian when I was like eight. Right. You know, I mean, I never ever had a part of my life where I was like, what am I going to do with my life? Whereas I meet kids that are like 25, they don't know what the fuck to do. Right. I was new.

You're always the same way you. I had no clue until, oh, you see that spider? A spider. I had no clue until I actually walked on the stage and touched her mic. So uncomfortable. She just got her posture completely changed She pulled her legs up. She's all freaked out by the spider. Well, that's because the spider keeps saying to her that'll do pig Real sassy spider. Charlotte's web joke. Charlotte's web joke. To be for the kids.

Yeah, we got it. Leslie is distracted by the spider, but then they get back on the conversation. It's rolling and it's going fine until the spider comes back again. They called me in a room and see spider. They called me in the room and they, see spider? They called me in the room. Yes. And you gonna kill it? Well, it didn't do it to you. Okay.

You're right. And it might be killing like other ants or something. You keep bringing it up. They both did not come out to be killed today. It was just like. That's not the kind that I like. There are certain spiders. Is that a Black Widow?

Well, it's Black Widow. I have no idea, but it's anyway. Come on with your story. So I hate when you get shamed out of not killing a spider, kill the fucking spider. 100% of the time. Or shut up about it. Or shut up about it.

Yeah, or act like it's not there if you don't want to kill. But if you're going to keep being like, see that spider right there, like, I'll take care of it for it. No! Definitely not. I've seen you go apeshit over ladybugs. They almost died. She immediately went right through the black widow. Oh, it's got to be a black widow. Is that what you want to go black widow? Okay, never Brown recluse. So let's get back to how naturally funny Leslie Jones is.

She's one of these comics who tells the story about first getting up on stage and she was reluctant, but all of her friends are telling her how funny she is. She has to go up on stage. So she does with no material. She just gets up on stage and you won't believe it, she was incredible. For me it was more of like, oh, I was funny? Oh, I didn't, I mean, I thought that I was saying funny stuff but I ain't no people actually who's laughing

at what I said and for her to be like, yo, no, like you're funny, funny, like you need to get on stage. And when I got on stage I'm telling you it just felt like all of it came it was like And I was like oh shit. Oh Comedian I'm gonna be a comedian cuz I was you'd be like yeah, I'm gonna be an actress that's gonna play whoopee Goldberg That's that's what I whoopee or donkey Kong sure So it's amazing that she's not funny now, but somehow 40 years

ago she was killing it on stage. Was that stage the top of the Empire State Building? Hard to tell. Hard to know these things. All right. So when she was hired, when she was hired by SNL, she was originally hired as a writer. And then the first time she got on camera, they let her do a bit on Weekend Update. And spoiler, she was amazing. They, when they gave me that update, the update was just like doing standup,

but just sitting down. I was like, that's this shit, that's eats. You want me to do this? This is like fucking taking candy from a baby. You know, the first update, they was like, you were nervous. I was like, bitch, I just was doing stand up. Taking candy from a baby.

Yeah, I'm not sure what the analogy is there, but apparently she was so comfortable because she's so funny and naturally gifted at stand up that she could easily just go on a weekend update and Crush it for the first time. And so Bill Maher is intrigued by this and he says what was the bit that you did? What is this amazing bit that you crushed because I don't remember because no one knows but she's gonna explain what the bit was Because if I was a fucking slave, I would have all the best men They were trying to breed me. Yeah, I would have Denzel.

I have a shot. Can I have all the fine motherfuckers? And every every nine months, I will be giving them a fucking breed, baby. Wow. So her bit was if she was back in slavery time, rather than never getting laid like she does now, they'd be forcing guys to fuck her. Yeah. rather than never getting late like she does now, they'd be forcing guys to fuck her. Okay. Ew. Get it, Tuki?

Pretty good pants, right? Did she say every five months or nine months? I think nine, I think she said nine. Oh, okay, I thought she said five. No, no, no, she said three months after my birthday. Okay. I got your hand off my penis! Sh! day. Okay. I see Dr. Steve looking down. I'm like, I know it's coming. Yeah. That's when I back off. I'm like, okay. All

right. So this is great because now Bill Maher is talking about how great that bit is and how ballsy it is. It's unbelievable. We wrote it. It's a ballsy one.sy it is, it's unbelievable. We wrote it. It's a ballsy one. It's not even that it's so ballsy as much as you gotta be talented to perform it. Cause when I would do it, it was just as simple as that.

It was just like, if I was on the fucking plantation, I would have the best, I would be recruited. I think I would be the number one slave draft pick. But I mean. No, you gotta be black to perform it. That would help. Bill Martin did that joke. Holy shit.

This would be a way different episode. This would be a lot more fun. I'm sorry for what I said. He'd be on the all apologies podcast next week. So she just says, she's so pompous. She goes, well, it's kind of ballsy that you talk about slavery time instead of in front of a white liberal audience.

She goes, no, but you have to be super talented to pull it off, which thankfully I am. So no problem there. Yeah, you're killing it. She could tell a chicken crossing the road. Probably. She could probably do that. I bet she can do a well crafted cancer joke as well.

It has to be well crafted though. Those are the rules or just a joke. Any any genocide joke will do. Yes, they are. Cancer has to be well crafted. Well, specific rules. I sent you guys all the rules. I think it's on page three. The handbook. Steve's flipping through it right now as we speak the Right now, Steve. What did you want to say? What do you got? No, I was just going to. It's terrible as the audio audience can't see it, but Bill is actually thumbing his nose at her. He's digging for one.

So now we're talking about how that joke does very well in white clubs, which Bill Maher was surprised by because he would think that white people would be uptight about that. But she says, no, actually, the black people are uptight about the joke about me being on the plantation. And then the other guy is fucking me in order to get me pregnant for more baby slaves that

would grow up to be giant black people that would then do the things the slaves do on the plantation. You follow me? Yeah. OK. So hilarious. It's hilarious. It's all brilliant.

All of it's crushing. So she's talking about how this crushes it at white clubs. The bigotry is funny. The black people would get mad at me. No, I'll tell you this. Listen, they would when I do that joke, I would do that in white clubs. I'm telling you that shit would I mean rush because I would come out of like the number one thing. I'm the number one slave draft pick. I'm going to Arkansas, Nebraska trying to get me. It was just like, if the whole joke was an intricate thing. In LA? In LA, I would do it at the parlor all the time

at J. Davis show all the time. It would rip, because it was a genius joke. That was a genius joke. That crushed everywhere she went. Wow, that's everywhere she went. Wow This escalated quickly Yeah, I get the sense that she's getting more and more confident as Bill Marr compliments her So it started as like yeah, it's pretty comfortable on SNL doing this bit I've been doing it for a while and now you know Bill Mars like well, that's pretty ballsy. Oh, you don't even know

It's fucking amazing. It crushes everywhere. I go. I'm so good at it. Everyone loves the fuck out of it. It's amazing. But she has to explain it to black people because they don't get the joke. No, I didn't call black women niggas. I said that if I was on a plantation, I would be breed it because I am a Mendingo and I would have all the best men

that come, that's what I said. Stuff fuck like, and it's what pissed me off, I told people I said, if the joke is so fucking genius, you should be proud that I even wrote a joke like that. Right. She's telling black people they should be proud of her for writing such a genius joke. She has done a service to her race with that joke.

Why is he disrespecting us, queen? Why is he disrespecting us with that joke? This is the craziest shit. We got to get Leslie Jones on this show. I just want to wind her up. She's a black woman, John. Yeah, I could do a couple better than she's just like, yeah, I know. I'm the greatest ever of all time for sure.

Yeah, this is different than Bobby Lee though, is just laughing nervously and completely afraid. Oh yeah, very different. Bill Maher is intrigued, like genuinely. Yeah, and he's a bit stout and drunk. Yeah, yeah. So there's also that, he's like, oh, that would happen. And she's OK with just taking over and talking about how

he's just. Yeah, he doesn't have to do anything. But didn't she like restructure that Comment that that one broadcaster made years ago and got yeah, Nambasid for me the Greek She just took what he said and just made it you know, I'm a big black lady The genius joke she just told us it's a genius joke, Tiki. Are you not paying attention? Get on board.

Come on. Oh, Tuki, very stupid. Tiki. She's such a genius. She has to explain how smirky she is. Of what, like, you surprised to see a black woman be smarting and what the fuck that you see some of these with other women do?

Oh, I'm so sorry that I'm not just talking about dick. Well, it's kind of about dick. I mean, when it boils down to that joke is kind of about dick. Her dick? It starts with the premise of I'm not getting laid, but 200 years ago, I'd be fucking all the hot guys. Yeah. So she's thinking of fucking. That's how the joke started. That's how it started in her head So then she starts talking about how this is obviously brilliant and genius material George Carlin ask But she says that when she started her goal was to do just dick jokes But not just any dick jokes producer Chris. In fact, I believe the term dick jokes is kind of synonymous with hack comedy Low hanging fruit easy things. It'll get a chuck a lot of people get a rise out of people

I don't think she understands that when I first started my goal was to write better dick jokes than men. I Remember the first time I was oh my god. I was so good I was so good I remember TK Kirkland coming up to me one time going women ain't supposed to talk like that You can't be talking about dick and I said you talk about pussy and you don't have no pussy. I got a pussy Why would I not talk about it? So she's not only good at dick jokes she's better than everyone else at dick jokes, which is a weird thing to say.

When I set out to be a hack comedian, I wanted to be the hackiest hack comedian that ever hacked and I accomplished it easily. Congratulations, Leslie Jones. Dr. Steve, can you please stop interacting with the chat who's telling us to move on? People that show like, all right, what's the next segment you're gonna do? And I was like, I know, what the fuck? Why are we still talking about?

What should I fast forward through? Can you just remove the chat from your view, Steve? You can talk to me in the puppet and Chris. We're all right here. Hang out with you. It's okay. It's all good, Steve. Let's get to the part. let's get to the part.

Let's get to the part that we often get to on this show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Boom. All right. So suddenly, jazz having quite the week. If you caught point dabble point yesterday, I've been on a whole media tour. I was, I did Rain De Vito show on Thursday, the BS show on Friday.

We did almost a three hour point dabble point last night. You got jet lag. A lot going on in the devil verse right now I didn't demand my friend. Yes. Yes, it's um, um the toast to the town as they say Why are you laughing at that? That's how I'd sum up this past week John on the other hand is Trying to deflect from all of these papers that came out about it, not paying child support. A lot of embarrassing things about John's personal life has been leaked by Jimmy Dabbles on Twitter. People

are going through reading every page, Tukeno and Chris will be doing that tomorrow on the show. And so John has to deflect from this. And so what he's talking about is how he is winning And so what he's talking about is how he is winning the dabbleverse right now. He's the leader of the dabbleverse. And why not? It's not as if you need a computer that works or some type of format to your show or new material, talent or prep time or anything like that. No, no, no. He is crushing it and he talks about how.

Yes, it's true. His computer freezes up every episode. And maybe just maybe he should get a new computer, but he actually has a better plan. Somebody emailed me and the person was right. Totally right. Totally right They said I Should buy a new computer now I Could afford to buy a new computer, but this computer is not that old

You know because it is thing getting locked up. So what I'm gonna do I'm gonna rent a new computer a fairly new computer from the guy down the street and We're gonna do show with the new computer, or a fairly new computer from the guy down the street. And we're going to do a show with the new computer. And if it doesn't lock up, then we know it's this computer. And then I'll take it to Maxwell one last time. And then if it's broken, then get the fuck. I'll fucking buy another computer. I don't care. That's a lot of steps to this process.

John, it is the computer. I'm not sure if it's the computer or not. It keeps locking up. It's the computer. What'm not sure if it's the computer or not. It keeps locking up. It's the computer. What else would be freezing up? I don't know. I'm trying to figure out here. Yeah, but I saw Hulk Hogan on the TV

and he said that I can rent a computer for no money down in 999 a day at Rent-A-Center. So I'm going to go that route. It's not even that, Tuki. He's borrowing someone else's computer who's not using their computer. Are. He's borrowing someone else's computer who's not using their computer. Are you using that? Can I try it? He goes, I'm going to borrow a new computer while it's just someone's computer, probably like the iPad that he gave to the

whole lot of staff. Can I donate that? Yeah. So he is going to, he's going to grab that and test that out. And then if it proves that it doesn't freeze up with that computer, then he's going to take his current computer that he's freezing up, bring it back to the Mac store again. The scientific method. And then if they tell him it's broken and they can't fix it, then he'll buy a new computer. Also, sir, you're a loser.

And he can easily afford. There's some process he's got right now.'s gonna take months. I have a feeling well That's what he's hoping for Everything he does has a giant process. It's like the cancer charity thing or whatever. Yeah You give me money and then I'll calculate the percentage that I need to take out of it And then I will send that to this guy who will write a check and then he'll write a check and then he'll mail it There's more convoluted than suing tookie. Yes.

All right. So I wanted to play that first because it does set this up pretty well as John is really calling me out good here. Vince is a fucking genius. All right. Because obviously Vince is saying the same thing I'm saying. So Carl, hey, Carl, I know you're watching. So it's okay to fucking.

There we did. I knew it was going to happen. But we had a full opportunity. He's a fucking idiot. Whoopsie. Yeah, it's not the same effect when you're freeze up in the middle of your rant yelling at me directly. This is a crazy thing that happened last night.

So Vince the lawyer is funding John's entire operation right now and not just monetarily, although that's part of it. All of John's bits, all of his clips that he's playing, he's getting all of them from Vince the loser now. And at a certain point, John is running out of beer and he's very concerned that he's gonna run out of beer because usually during the show, someone delivers beer to him from Vince the loser.

So John's panicking and he makes a phone call to Vince on his show. Vince. Yeah. Come on the show. Not the chance. All right. Did you order me beer or not? Yeah, it's supposed to be there by now.

All right. Cause I was going to go because I'm about to call postmates. They're outside. I think they have a knocked. All right, cuz I was gonna go cuz I'm about to call postmates Yeah, but they haven't knocked No nothing nada Yeah, but they need my driver's license this guy's no shame at all No, he's doing this. This is a conversation. You should be having off air Talking to your one friend who buys you beer every day and asking where the fuck is that he's really irritated. Yeah. It seems like Vince is fucking with them too. Like oh what it didn't do 20 minutes ago.

Does it seem that way? Steve? Well okay. I have a great clip after this one. Yeah like no shit Sherlock. I have a great clip for you. John needs Vince to buy him beer and fight his battles now Hey Vince listen, you just say because I'm on the other key just say one thing but Vince I say you sue Carl, please How much time do you have? He said he was gonna prove Josh that I was muttering Jay. Or he just gotta retract his full statement.

What do you have? Alright, alright, but I want... Cause look, he's got some money. Come on Vince! Be a man! Hey John, don't fuck with his business or his show, please. Well, he's trying to fuck with you, isn't he? Yeah, but I don't want anyone to fuck with Carl for his business.

Okay. Money. Alright, but I don't want anyone to fuck with Carl. Oh, okay. Money. All right, whatever. You hear? Yeah, I hear. All right, I'll see you later, you pussy. All right. Why don't you sue and call your pussy? It's gonna bully him into suing me. What is she suing you for?

So we'll get into it here. I've been claiming that muttering J on Twitter is Vince the lawyer Now I believe this to be true. I have a lot of evidence that would back that up However, I will say this there's got to be more than one person managing that account Because this week muttering J tweeted at me 214 times in the span of about 24 hours So I can't imagine that's all Vince the loser. There has to be someone else or a team of people manning this account.

And it's weird because muttering J who's British never spells any words the way the British people spell words. And also has very different styles depending on the day and the week and the time of when they're tweeting. So there's a lot of evidence to say that maybe it's not all Vince the Lord.

Maybe the muttering Jay that tried to get John fired was a different person using that account at that time. Sounds like a good gig. I want to work for money. Right. I know it's fun to go on and troll people all day and then your shifts over and move out with your life. Someone else morning rail.

It's brilliant though. Someone tries to sue you for restraint of trade for, say, tweeting to your employer and you lose your job. They can just say, well, that wasn't me. There's six of us. I can't remember who posted that one. It's genius. Yeah, we talked about it in the break room, but that was months ago.

Who could possibly know? Yeah, right. Does that mean you are giving Vince traction? Are you giving him traction right now and saying he is not? Necessarily muttering Jay. You know what? Thank you for asking that Vince if you're listening to this You can go ahead and sue me. Ah Now this is this is hilarious. This is a great clip right here from John. This is from Thursday show. No, he wasn't Why do you think muttering Jay is Vince? Look Vince is not gonna lie to me about this. I

Think John believes that to be true. I think he really thinks that Vince is not going to lie to him about something. He's upstanding. I don't know what evidence there is of that. They would back that up. Vince lies about everything all the time. That's his shtick. That's his thing. It's just getting sad.

He's getting sad. He really needs a real friend. Well, speaking of needing a friend, we broke it wide open yesterday on Point Dabble Point that our boy Tim Duransky once again catfishing John. And the way he did it was brilliant. He set up this account on Twitter with just an average attractive woman and just commented on Brian Karam's post, never contacted John at all. John reached out to him. John found all. John reached out to him. John found her, went right to her page,

so I'm looking to meet people and reached out and within 48 hours was inviting her to Atlantic City. They were already divorced within 48 hours. I'm a horny guy, I'm a horny guy, is that so bad? Yeah, he's, he's not so bad. So she claimed to be living in Rhode Island. He's like, would you ever come to LA? You want to go out to dinner? You want to get some drinks? Like he's moving in really quickly with want to go touch on this. So this is

Tim Duransky super chatting, John Friday night. Oh, yeah. Tim Duransky's, why aren't a thick girl? Hi, John. Tell me, why don't you talk about me? I still have your pics. Swink. Yeah, OK. Yeah, OK.

Like, I'm never going to do that. I was on to you right from the get-go. Trust me. I made a video that day. I said, here it is. They're trying again. You reached out to her. Yeah, I was going to say that's why you reach out to a total stranger because you're on to them. Get your onto them. That's why you spent all that time going back and forth with these

private correspondents because you're on to them. Did Tim say that he sent him picks? I missed that. Wow. He didn't say that. I have a feeling the job would no better than to do that. Unless unless it's turbo moendez. If he's sending those picks, I would. Yeah, I have no idea who that is. So I don't know. I have a clip of that.

He has no idea. Actually, maybe I should get to that now because there's a super chat that comes in and John obviously does not know who turbo moendez is. Oh my God. that comes in and John obviously does not know who Turboble One is. Oh my God. Oh, this is funny too. So he's trying to make fun of my wife.

And so he found a video of her singing karaoke at Dabblecon. At Dabblecon. Yeah. And my wife has like an amazing voice. She's crushing it. And John's going, she can't even dance. What is she doing? She's a karaoke thing. He going, she can't even dance. What is she doing? She's carrying a Yoki bag.

She's like, her moves are off. Oh my God, why is she wearing pants? She wears pants. Oh, you see how stupid this is? She's wearing pants. Oh. It's Lady Kay's mommy. Oh my God.

Dude, I've never met who that's a big piece you are turbo. I don't have oh you mean cock cuz I don't wear Who has a bigger piece you or turbo is the question from Mesa International Never met who has a bigger piece you or turbo. I don't have oh you mean cock cuz I don't wear any hairpiece Pieces I don't know. Pounds baby pounds. I don't know. I look I'm six inches, bro Okay, well how big is turbo do you know to key? Oh? I mean at least eight or nine. Well, how big is turbo? Do you know Tuki? Oh, I mean, at least eight or nine. Okay. So turbo definitely has a bigger piece. Yes. Then job. That's unfortunate. I guess it's not hereditary. No, it is not. You thought about them. Just the volume of knowledge you have to be have to understand jokes in this insular universe.

Just as a bigger piece, you were turbo. We all know what that means. And then the song is in our head right now. You know, I wanna feel you deep inside. I think. I got stuck. Oh, I think I have to re-record that song. Yeah, you just got yourself a new gig.

That would just, you should definitely be the singer of guys stuff. It just amazes me for sure. The level of just symbolism and stuff that's just there, just like a language or an alphabet or anything. Sorry, I'm waxing. Phyllis, honestly, Steve, I think about this, too, because we want to welcome new people into W.A.T.P. in the devil verse.

And sometimes we get to a point where there's no way anyone's going to know what the fuck anyone's talking about. Try explaining this to someone. Right. Yeah. It gets to be a bit much, which is why I don't want to spend all day every day trying to decipher this, but I do want to point out that John does not get jokes. It's a hilarious, these super chats. Nice place. Fan for a long time

I'm new LA migrant care for the longer texts oldest use Men woman restroom oldest use men or women restroom is the question. Okay, hmm. John is has no idea What is this person's talking about? I? Have my own bathroom, dude. I didn't clean the tub this morning. Ew. Man, why the shit?

Tub cleaner. You fucking sprayed all over the tub? All right. Now he's pranking. Yo, he really is new to this. Yeah, I find this stuff, it's called tub cleaner. I didn't know it existed. No one told me there was gonna be bursting.

I am the tub scrubber. But that's where his mind went to. When someone's asking if his trans son sits or stands when they pee, he's like, ah, I don't know, but I just washed my tub today. He just immediately starts flexing. He's patting himself on the back. I also bought a bar of body cleaner.

I wiped myself until the toilet paper was clean this time. I'm learning. Yeah, shit, way, I can do that too. Next week, I'm going to start washing my heads afterwards. All right. So I was explaining that John was taking his victory laps this week. This is a clip I'm definitely gonna keep around for a while. I think we'll want to revisit it in a few weeks few months Tomorrow it's over

It is over It's over Carla first off. I have to point out because John does this to me over ends in ER have to point out because John does this to me over ends in ER. Susanna ends in a he says over and Susanna. What is with the Long Island where they swap those two things out? It's weird. Now we do that down here too. Do you? Doesn't make fucking sense.

Turlet, turlet, Earl. Put Earl in your car. Everyone knows Southerners talk like idiots, but I'm just saying John talks like an idiot. What can I trying to make? It's Ova. It's Ova. Get to the print.

Yeah. He's White Trash. He's Long Island White Trash. And he'll always be Long Island White Trash. That's why he fucked up the move to California so bad. He bought a house he could afford because he is Long Island White Trash. And that's what he'll always be, John.

He tells the story about how, I guess, Susanna was driving kind of a shitty car and they bought that mansion in Calabasas. And someone commented to Susanna, like you got the wrong car for that house or this neighborhood or something like that. Trying to help her out. Like it's not a good look.

You shouldn't have a big, you know, $2 million mansion and driving around a 10 year old Subaru or whatever it was. And John's like, that's how snobby they are in California. It's like, you're the one who fucking bought the house in that neighborhood asshole. What do you think was gonna happen? What's the big idea? What big deal is the 2010 Corolla?

It's only got 105,000 miles on it, Susanna. Those things go for 200,000 easy. We can flip that right now I gotta make money up this car, but you're right. I mean that's what I mean when you say he's white trash. Yes That's a specific example Right, I'm not one of those people is gonna shame someone for their fucking car But you have to understand why that's happening where you are yeah, right? It's a kid with nothing with $200 sneakers Correct. Yeah, It's a kid with nothing with $200 sneakers. Correct. Yeah. It's great. Paulino.

You said he didn't realize it. But he followed you on the exact same time. And we're both right. I gotta go chain and to Mayor Jordan's and this is all the stuff I'll be buried in. So it's brilliant. All right. So John goes out and out about how much my show sucks, how much WTP sucks. And then he gets distracted. This is John.

It is finest. All right. Here we go. Run to Sue. Alhari black. Hi. Who you with? Impulse.

Yeah, people just walking into his shitty studio apartment Postmates or a grandma. Okay, that's a probably approved list. Oh, this is janitor's closet Russia, yeah, listen to this follow-up question. He goes, where are you from? He goes, Russia. Now, did you hear a thick Russian accent there? Because I didn't. Just sound like he just said Russia. Listen to his follow-up question on this. Did you get out of there after the war started? Did you get out of there after the war started? It's a two year old war.

You think this guy's been living in the States for a year? Yeah, I ran for Kanoga Park. Also, yeah, no one's fleeing Russia. That's not where the war is. Tell me. Oh, we invaded Ukraine, I'm out of here. He's so stupid. Whenever he tries to talk about geopolitical anything,

it really shows how unlearned he is. He makes me feel smart. Right. There we go again. Oh, and his ID never works for some reason. It's gotta be covered. That's his Mensa card. It's gotta be covered in so much crap

they can never scan it. Boogers. You know, it never works. I don't know why. You have to have them for it. covered in so much crap they can never scan it boogers never work. You have to have the board. No, you don't have boogers and come out of the park. I'm an idiot. It worked. Thank God.

All right. Thanks, buddy. Have a good night. Holy shit. Oh Fucking non-stop here He's all worn out. Yeah, I can't catch a break. I can't catch a break. You just got a free meal And I love that he's just like I can't believe every time he's delivered people come while I'm doing a show. What are the chances of that?

He's complaining when they're not never any other time exactly Vince the loser is not sending you shit when no one's watching you. Yeah waste of money. That's the show That's the point. He's Perry caravella. He doesn't understand it. This is the whole thing that we're doing We're watching you get fucked with thank God. That's the entertaining part about your show now that we're doing, we're watching you get fucked with, I think that's the entertaining part about your show now. So John is trying to scrub through my video here. I'm not gonna play it for you. He's scrubbing back and forth and looking all around.

This is, by the way, this week he's been bragging more than ever how much prep he puts into a show. And he only had Kevin Brennan for not prepping and he puts all the prep in and he can not find the spot. What is the time code? You need to know that would help me. He needs his producer Vince to tell him what the time code is. But I can't find a goddamn time code.

It's almost like you should have written it down or something. I'm sorry. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh Super chat. All right. So now Vince is messaging him. Right on schedule. Yeah. This is what John's upset about. We got super chats, but watch this. Now, Steve, I want you to watch this closely and tell me if we should be worried about this gentleman. Okay.

Okay. Should we? This guy knows a webcam is staring at him right now. Who? You. You. Who? this guy knows a webcam is staring at him right now who you know who was episode Who's episode? Oh When do the slow adult but what is he doing? What is he doing? You go to the zoo and you just look at the orangutan the old orangutan Yeah, it's just like playing with its blanket that it thinks is his baby. It's just so Yeah, it doesn't even realize all these people are watching it.

So I think what's happening is John just said on a show and of course, Vince the loser is watching. So John just said on the show, hey, what's the time stamp? I can't find it. So Vince texted him. I bet what Vince said was not Carl's show. You got to pull up my episode watching Carl's show, you know, because that's how Vince wants to get his stuff up there.

That's why he's asking who. Yeah, right. He's like who what? Yeah, I'm cool So Look at all the money he's collecting That's what he's upset about that's what it all comes down to out here. Oh, no. He put out a shitty tweet that people didn't like.

People gave him a lot of shit for it. And then he watched us do a show talking about it where people supported us and gave us super chats. That's what really he's upset about. Why don't I get I'm the one who wrote the shitty tweet? Why don't I get the super chat? I'm way more likeable. And actually, and Dr. Steve,

perhaps you because you reached out to me once you saw this tweet and you're like, okay, this is a new love for this asshole. Fuck this guy. And now he's been vindicated for whatever reason. Vince the loser has convinced him that he's in the right. So now he's just doing this, the joke, the joke. Yeah, Carl's dad is recovering.

I don't do good accents. I'll try Australian. I'm making a fucking... Carl's... This is Australian-British. Carl's dad is recovering, not from the embarrassment of his loser son, but from cancer.

Sorry. I don't do impressions, but I don't do four-jokes. You don't do impressions, accents, jokes. Shows. You don't do anything, but I don't do four jokes. You don't do impressions, accents, jokes. Shows. You don't do anything. It's very obvious, but it's so easy to get him to just do these things and embarrass himself. He just reads a super chat. They're like, hey, can you do that in German accent?

I could do Australian British. My kids love you. You could tell he's also very frustrating confused because that one day he got so many super chats Hmm, and now everything has dwindled back down to his average like right hundred dollars or less This is why John's an idiot because he saw the money that he made on that Monday show But it only came from three people It was like broccoli Leo gun one of the person gave like big dollar amounts and so John goes I'm on easy street now

This is my life now. This is my life. 500 bucks a day. That's fucking holy shit. I can't believe it. I'm going after everyone's sick pants. Don't tell Susanna. Yeah, right.

Who else has cancer out there? I gotta do bits. John's going back. Yes. He thought he was making his big comeback with that. So the other big thing that John's big gotcha this week, and we talked about it yesterday on Pointe Double Pointe, Andy was here and we were talking about

Vince the Warriors kids enjoying Centering John's program. And he goes, those kids sound like losers. And I repeated, they do sound like losers. If they enjoy Centering John as a entertainer, they must be losers. And Vince the lawyer played that on his show, and then John played it on his show a bunch of times,

and I made this point yesterday, but here's how I know that it's not actually offensive. These guys keep playing it over and over again. Taylor Swift is suing a company for making AI nudes of her. She's not posting the AI nudes on her Twitter. See this? Look at what they did. Look how terrible this is.

The point is. The point is, Carl Botte AI decides to explain to John why that joke is a joke. Carl Botte, the joke is the idea that any child who watches a dripping wet belligerent has been screaming the same idiot points over and over and must be a loser. Yes.

You mean like Carl and Shuey doing a show on me every fucking day? You mean like that? The same show over and over again? Do you think he gets the irony there? No. I think that's over his head, right? He's not understanding that that's precisely what he's doing.

It's anywhere but in his head. Okay. That would make a lot more sense. So I love the fact that the guy has to explain it. One of the joke is that, you know, someone enjoys your show. They're probably a loser. And I don't know if you heard about this, but yesterday I really stepped in it.

I proclaimed that all children under 18 are losers. Oh, no, I know. It's a lot of miners. It's a lot of miners. I had to be losing yesterday. I'm going to piss off a lot of people. That'll be the new S.J. Army. Yes, a bunch of miners.

Yeah. All right. but the good news is, the good news is, guys, and this is not a rerun, John is still excited to get me in trouble with the Jewish defamation league. Oh, jeez. Yeah, he really thinks this is real. So I'm going to cut this. And you know what?

You're fucked. Because I'm going to send this you know what you're you're fucked because I'm gonna send this to the Jewish defamation league Because you can't be making these fucking comments. Are you out of your mind? He already did that he already tagged them in something they have bigger fish to fry at this point Yeah, they do not care and john tries this to he tried it with 2 key to he started tagging LGBTQ things and no one cares, John. Yeah, it's your fight. It's not their fight. They don't give a shit. 73 million people are under 18 curls. Oh, shit. That's a lot. Oh, it's a lot. How many of those people have parents? What percentage? At one point they all did, but yeah.

I would have a lot of parents upset with me. I'm like, I really stuffed in it yesterday. Oh, there's a certain point. I might have already played the clip, but there's a certain point where John declares that Vince is a genius and he goes, he's saying what I'm saying. This guy's a genius.

He's awesome. You gotta love this guy. I love that he believes everything that he reads. So people just send him super chance and he believes them. Oh, Frost tips. I know Carl Frost and his tips now. Is this guy. Does this guy realize he's a laughing stock of the double verse now?

Oh, Carl Frost and his tips now. Can you believe it? This guy, this Frost and tips. What do you think he is? And you nap. Got me again. And you nap and you play mandolin. We have lines. That's what the whole thing.

It's crazy. It's what it is. Crazy. I love that. Dodger Steve is just having a conversation with Eric Nagel in the chat. And if anyone's hearing typing on a keyboard, that is what's happening right now. They say that young people have a short attention span, but I don't think it's just the young people. All right. Held hostage. Who's being held hostage? I am. It's fine. It's totally fine. Who's side

of you on that? Cardiff's telling me to shut up. See, Carl doesn't pay his guests, and then he makes them stay the whole time. Dr. Stevie even said it. All right, so now John is seeing the Broccoli's fed up with the same clips over and over again. And it's getting annoying for him. So he's explaining that

Well, I know I know I'm gonna get off it But this is just my my big victory lap and I gotta go over it and so he pulls up a video that no one can hear or see I've been saying that for fucking 30 years 30 years. Well, it's not frozen. It's not frozen. This is John just staring at something and watching something. And no one else can hear us. Oh, yeah, you can see the scroll under there.

It literally looks like it's frozen. Yeah, no, this is the show. Dr. Seve gets paid and kisses from Carl We all do Everybody knows oh my god. That was all All real time that we're watching this is John show show. Tuky, can you give me a, it's not a show. This isn't a show. This is not a show.

Into the elephant and out. Oh my god, how embarrassing. You summed that up very well just now,. A good job. What is the elephant thing? I think I missed the beginning of the elephant thing. And now I just get it all the time. And I don't know why he's doing that. I don't know either. I saw the. Oh, is it a Vinny reference?

No, is it because he. How dare you. I just see for the win right there. Oh, he doesn't mean I always say he has a mind like an elephant. He never forgets. He does Yeah, he does point to his brain a lot. Is that it? I don't know maybe although it wouldn't make sense there Although we don't know what he was listening to eat peanuts with my nose So does a shit hay

The good news is is that Vince the loser has put out some videos of me and my wife singing the victory lap song And so John is now learned of the victory lap song and he's now showing off his chops No, this is so embarrassing victory lap victory lap John is taking a victory lap victory lap John is not taking a victory lap, victory lap, victory lap. John's not taking a fucking nap. Good, look out. John's taking a victory lap. I love it.

It was only a matter of time before you all realize this guy is a loser. Skull. He's amazing. Yeah. I wonder what who Steve's typing to now. We see the squirrel watcher is it forced to join? Oh, it's both.

Okay. I think Steve is monitoring Jay. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Oh, could you imagine that'd be a twist, wouldn't it? Well, I was. Dr. Steve's like, oh, I retired years ago, guys. I'll have a real job.

You guys thought I was a doctor? No. Yeah. Definitely not. I'm on Twitter all day long. Can you believe me? Dr. Steve, could John be drowning internally? No.

I don't know what that means. He always sounds like he has liquid in his lungs. There's a lot of liquid. Oh, okay. Well, I could have, I don't know what that means. He always sounds like he has liquid in his lungs. There's a lot of liquid. Oh, okay. Well, I could have, I mean... Can he dry drown from drinking too much beer? Not really. What can happen though is if, which, listen, I've never examined John, but just take someone,

a hypothetical, if someone is drinking and they have cirrhosis, they can actually exude fluid from their liver. It's called a CITES and they get a big distended abdomen. It pushes up on the, on the, you know, the chest wall and can cause problems with breathing. I don't think John has any of that. No, I think he's doing great as after CITES. Never seen any evidence of that. Yeah, no, he's doing great. He's killing it. And he just drinks to hydrate anyway. He said so many times. That's true.

Yeah. Coors light and Michel obaltras is water. That's why when he was almost out of it, he started panicking and not only had to call Vince, but after that, he ordered it himself from Postmates or whatever. Just in case Vince was fucking with him and he wasn't going to get. Not that Vince lies to him, but just in case something were to happen, he needed

to make sure the beer was going to be there. How I used to get about Coke, but I've never seen anyone with a Coors light addiction. Right. Yeah, I've never seen someone like sucking out of the carpet. I think I spilled a beer. But so you just heard John's victory lab side, which he nailed. That was good. He is a writer and the writers guild. That's true. So yeah, all that stuff.

So this is John singing another song for us because in John's mind, and this is very similar to Chad Zumak when he discovered like an isotopes video or something. And he's just like, it's over for Carl. It's over everything You saw one subreddit or you know post somewhere to separate it. It's over this guy. It's done I saw three comments who are all greeted me on this reddit thread and so this is where John's at right now Look it hold on. I gotta back this up a second. This is funny Look at the face of the injection. Look. This is similar to

Kevin Brennan's breakdowns of me lately, where he's just making shit up. He just is grasping its straws here. And so, John, I'm looking over at my other monitor. I have this monitor here with my notes and then this monitor over here is where I see Tuki and Steve and the chat and the discord. So when I'm on with, yeah, hey, what's up? So when I'm on with Ray, I'll be looking straight ahead'm on with Ray I'll be looking straight ahead at him and then I'll be looking over here I'll be doing different things but to them this is you come contemplating suicide yeah but yeah watch the analysis of those face of the injection look right there yep it's over look at that face that is the moment I realized my career in podcasting is over. I started working

my resume right after that. That is the face of a guy. I know I don't know how to turn this is as loud as it goes. That is the face of a guy who realizes it's all crumbling. That's the face of a guy on the Ray DeVito rock bottom podcast. We got another hour and a half of this shit. Okay, whatever. Must be so bored. That's when you start messaging Eric Nagel. Yeah, I wish I was texting with Eric Nagel. That's the worst.

I'm a guy who realizes it's all crumbling. It's all crumbling when the walls are crumbling and down when the walls are crumbling, crumbling when the paddled walls are crumbling down when the paddled walls are crumbling, crumbling, you dick. He never loses his comedic instinct. Because even though he's angry and comedy doesn't come from an angry place He's still killing it. It's amazing only son. He did get pulled out off. He's very good tag at the end Dick has a pretty good tag. I gotta figure out why producer Chris's camera is not working and Why Steve keeps typing the people during the show. Okay. And while I do that,

Cardiff is here back from vacay. Hello. Hello. What's up, Cardiff? Okay, hello. Apologize, I feel like John looks right now, so. Oh no. I guess this part's gonna get cut out of the show.

Maybe this is a good time. Yeah, we say that every time, bud. Let's see who can say the N word. Whoa. Ready? Not to leave you go first. Okay. Or I could announce that tomorrow night on. This is a sausage fest that we have going on and you know with potatoes that's all right.

But I would love to bring on. It's good with me. The lovely and beautiful. Emily! Kitty! Hi. Hi. Oh yeah, I know.

We're all disappointed too. Sorry. Trying to pretend that we're excited. How's it going, Kendi? It's all right. Yeah, that's what I thought. I can't I can't believe Dr. Steve and two gear here. Yeah, you see my kidney.

You seem overwhelmed. Hi, oh my God. Seem really excited about it. Oh my God. Oh my God. Yesterday's potatoes over here. Yeah, hearing my name and Dr. Steve's voice is like an all time high.

Oh, yeah. You can't you don voice is like an all-time high. Oh, yeah You can't you don't worry it gets old pretty quick. Yeah, you might want to try drugs I'm pretty quickly part of used to be impressed Candy, I don't want to put you on the spot, but if this is you excited. What does an orgasm sound like out of you? Hmm. You loud actually All right, not a bad Time for everyone's favorite new game show, to poke a dabbler. Poking dabblers. That's right. Are you ready? What I hope?

A dabbler? Never a talent. Shulie is the worst. Tom Della. We hope. How big was Susanna's Areos? You have an Areola fucking fetish. They were normal. Decent. Decent. Any rank off. Any Joe or some loser who used to have a good job. Let's see, I didn't used to have a good

job. I used to have about 20 good jobs. A par. Something John ever pick up tricks with the plan parenthood. No. Ah, pass it with a nice guy. Thanks for the two bucks. Stuttering John Clips. Thanks for the dollar. And of course, dang, Lizzie, you're back. Thanks for the $5 bucks, John. You're right again.

No musician in the movie, Sarah, has ever used the pseudonym that got a filing on the fake name just like Cardiff Electric. Uh-oh. The difference is we all know what their real names were. You know what I'm saying? Like Ringo Starr, we all know, is Richard Starkey. You know what I'm saying? Like, we know their real names.

Share everyone else's name. I think it's Tim Duransky. If I'm not mistaken. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I don't remember. John, everybody. Yeah, I don't remember completely, but most of the celebrities that he says,

he knows the everyone knows the real name. He doesn't know the real name. I mean, you guys, I'll know. He didn't follow share up with anything. Nope. Everyone knows the real name he doesn't know the real name You know John everybody knows his name You know, I mean they could change your name, but we still know what that real name is There's the difference David Bowie was actually Davey Jones But he changed it because he didn't want to be

associated With Davey Jones from the monkeys. There's a little trivia for you. And you know what? Joey Ramone? Not his real name. It was Jimmy Ramone. It was Bill Ramone. I thought it was just Ramone.

Ramone. Ramone. Oh my God. I am going to take that keyboard away from Dr. Steve. I saw me. That was candy. Sorry. Fuck off.

Jesus Christ. Oh, the one time you weren't typing in your man of need. How? Fuck you. You see? You see? You're stupid minds. Stupid, stupid.

I have officially lost control. Officially. Yeah. You gotta do the one finger typing. One finger. Definitely gonna need a nap after this. Stupid stupid I've officially You gotta do the one finger type thing definitely gonna need a nap after this one And you cuz you didn't want to be associated With baby Jones for the monkeys. There's a little trivia for you

And let me tell you another thing. What did John say next here are your your choices. Fuck. Number one. Hey shit-weir. B. H. B. B. E. Yada yada yada. Next. Listen lady K. Number four. And you Brennan.

Lastly, silent Mike. No, oh, this is a double. So I don't think it's B only because he only spells my last after he says my name. It's programming his brain. Now he has to do that. He doesn't even know why he doesn't anymore, but he still does it. So I think I'm has to do that. He doesn't even know why he doesn't anymore, but he still does it So I think I'm gonna go with

Hey shit, where because that's just out of nowhere. I think that'd be a funny thing for him to say next What do you think? Dr. Steve? I? Actually wanted to go with number one because it's just funny Yeah, but I will get the only other one that's a pseudonym is silent Mike. So I'm going to take lastly. Okay. He's going. Well, there's listen Lady K. There's a shit wire and there's well shit wire. But other than that, I mean, we all know your real name. So and we know Brennan's. It's not Lady K asshole. Why do you think it's Lady K? It's not my real name. OK. I'll call my parents. I've asked.

You're always in his chat as Carla, so we know it was you, Lady K. All right, so you're taking Simon and Mike? Lastly. OK. Tuki, what do you got? I am actually going to go with a B, because I think he's going to try and say

that you use a different name. Good point. That is possible. Kendi? I'll just go with next because, you know. Cause you're obsessed with me, I get it. For the spread. She says listen lady, what are you laughing about over there?

Oh, nothing. I thought it was something funny. Someone told me in show curly. Producer Chris, what do you got? I also went with lastly silent Mike. All right, so no one went with Four and you brought and you brought it. All right. Here we go. It's fine. Damn it Carter Is There's the difference David Bowie was actually Davey Jones But he changed it because he didn't want to be associated no confused Davey Jones for the monkeys

there's a little trivia for you and let me tell you another thing hey shit way shit away. What a segue. And boy the way. Like he has an alarm on every five minutes. He has to scream about something. That's his dick. It's the only nickname he has. That's true. Yeah. It's the only one he actually does consistently because he calls me Carl L. ADK, Lady K, Mar, like a silent Mikey. He uses a douche pair. But yeah, but he kind of got off douche pair and just does the shit wire now. Then was he called Zen Houser like log cabin Larry? Oh, right. Look at that.

I guess Larry, the cable guy was taken, so he had to find a different one. Well, you ever have a conversation with George Cooney? I don't think that's thank you. Crack it, Bob. You're welcome. He's such a fat.

Cooney came up to me when I was on tonight show. John, I'm so happy for you. You ever get lost in his eyes, shit whale? He's Francis from Pee Wee's Big Adventure. Yes, he is. Without the money. Without the money, yes. My dad says I could have anything I want.

Do you see me? I'm happy I'm moving on. That's all for this time. Come back next time to find out if you have the George Clooney pandering enough to poke a dabbler. Subreddit surfing live Saturday, March the ninth comedy at the Carlson in Rochester, New York. Get your tickets now at Carlson comedy.com. Sit Eugene sit.

Good dog. Sit Eugene, sit. Good dog. Dr. Steve after he fucks? It's like, oh, I know that was lackluster. I'll see myself off. That's never happened before. Thank you, boys. Weird Medicine is where you want to go. Do you have a website people can visit? No. Don't you see, come on. Help me help you. I'm trying here. No, you can check out. Listen, I like doing the cameo because it's dirt cheap. I had him down two bucks at one point But it's just fun to do cameo comm slash weird medicine

I tried to do a goof cameo with Tom Myers. You know, I tried to engage him to do, you know, I have people do like someone got John did yell out WATP back in the early days Trucker Andy, right? Yeah. Was it Andy? No, Andy got to do something else. That's right. This was a listener.

Yeah. But he turned me in and said, this person is impersonating a popular radio personality. I thought, pop. No, and I found it hard to dislike Tom after that because he called me a popular Radio personality something you got he tattled on you. Yes, but he did dad Cameo cameo. Yeah blocked me

Weird dude man money. Tukysoup.com. Yes. And also, I am taking questions that people want Tuki to ask John to his face in Atlantic City. So if you have a question that you want Tuki to ask John to his face, email it at tukysoup.com. I want to know how long turbo is. That's my question. Okay, I will ask that. How many can I ask? Can I add a question? Yeah. Yes. Just a shout out to Don and Mike. Did you wash your ass today? Yes. That's a good question. Writing that down. Has your son ever queefed in your face? What else?

Do you ever borrow your son's tampons for your hemorrhoids? Yes. Is your son really happy with his vagina? Chad did say that. My son is happy with his vagina. My son says he's happy with his vagina. Broccoli! We should just recreate. So one of the deep fake videos we did a few years ago is John was talking about his hemorrhoids.

Yeah. And I just wrote it down verbatim word for word. And we just had you read the script. Yeah, we posted that. Yeah, I posted it pretty recently. It was great. But I wonder if because it's pretty easy to transcribe this stuff. Could we get an episode of John or I don't know 20 minutes of a show

or something like that and have to key recreate it. Yes. Word for word. Yeah. Yes. March 22nd in Largo, Florida. Yes. Very good. You and Cardiff do something like that. W. A. T. P. Live.com. Cardiff will be there to kill me. Dr. Steve will be there.

Chris will be there. I will be there. Candy. No. Steve will be there. Chris will be there. I will be there. Candy. No. What? She's the fastest. I'm out. I'll be in Rochester for subreddit surfing live.

What blanket? Can you are you coming to subreddit surfing? Mm hmm. Nice. That's excellent. I'll sell some tickets. Hold on a second. I just want to tell kind of a guest room and I can throw my wife right in there. No, no. Rather than sleeping a second. I just want to tell kindy. I do have a guest room and I can throw my wife right into there

No, no Rather sleep in a car Very cold very cold in Rochester, but speaking of dr. Steve I actually have a thing up on my patreon patreon.com Slash be dabbler network where we had dr. Steve screening our calls the other day and he recorded it So it's kind of interesting to hear dr. Steve screening phone calls and trying out all different voices And it's just an interesting behind-the-scenes look at dr. Steve when He has creative freedom and his pronounced annoying

I Heard that because most of the colors hung up He was such a bad call screw. There's one with the fuck is this Who's doing all different voices and they didn't know who he was and stuff like that, but it's all my cousin Delmer Yes, so thank you, Dr. Steve. Thank you for screening being the first celebrity call screener Doing that. That was the most fun. I've had a long time It was a lot of fun. Took he's had problems with call screening and I've been doing live calls here for forever. So I just hooked him up with my

the same company that I do my call screening through and it's very much like those serious XM call screening thing and I wanted to be the first call screener. So I'm gonna get a phone system for this show We're gonna have we'll be able to take phone calls I'm gonna get a phone system for this show. We're gonna have we'll be able to take phone calls Live, I just gotta get the system and then we'll be able to take phone calls John did all through on that one to get an idea. Yeah, what if W ATP sponsored John's calling system? Hmm. So similar to how Alex Stein sent John a USB microphone and a ring light and he uses neither of them I don't think I want to pay for equipment that John doesn't know how to use and hook up.

Yes, that is true. I sent him a robotic litter box way back in the early days of all this. Did you really? Yeah, when Hal Sparks was flossing at him. Yeah, I was like, yeah. Yeah, so I sent him one, yeah. He pawned it for a 12 pack. Yes, he's not using it.

He's obviously not using it. Three months later, I texted him and I asked him how he liked it. And he said, yeah, an opening yet. Kate Meadie has it. And I was on your show from the beach. And then he motherfucked me and DMs for about a week. And I saw him. Yeah.

I saw this stuff in Vegas called Pretty Litter. And basically, the Kitty Litter turns you're and it tells you if your cat Has some sickness or something if your cat's healthy dehydrated turns different colors. It's like a piss test. Hmm for cats That's what we should be paying John for let's check on these cats John use the pretty litter Send us a picture of it and then we'll pay you $100. It's not a poor cats if John Pete on it Would we know what kind of diseases he has? It's amazing we have that technology for cats, but humans, we just, you know, Yeah, right?

Piss the toilet. The toilet doesn't tell us anything. If the box gets up and runs away. And, uh, so, Card, if you got a potato soup Sunday night, I'm going to try. I'm going to try. I'm going to try and get it all in today and tomorrow. But yes, I'll try potato soup tomorrow night after the big game.

How did you second big game? How did you get sick? Was it in Vegas? I don't know. Every time I go to Vegas, I end up getting herpes. So I don't know. Story checks out. Kindie, you promoting anything right now?

Do you have an only fans? Do you have an only fans you want to promote? No. Are you a tinder? No you have an only fans you want to promote? Are you a Tinder? No, where can people find you? No, no, God, no, I don't suck foot on Walmart. Alright, we're gonna do some reviews and voicemails if anybody needs to scoot, they certainly can hang out if you'd like to.

And please join us again next time. It might be the episode we find out once and for all. Who are these podcasts? Sleep well, everybody. Starting in the moshbiz of morning radio. And now the show is called my town. Mm, okay. Great show.

Good job, everybody. Great job, everyone. Internet news with the Lucy tight box. From Facebook, Jimmy Khalidzitz comments, In John's defense, I know countless multi-millionaires that use their shirts to wipe themselves. Travis Wilson, at least the snotty shirts distract from the hemorrhoid blood, that's mencer level subterfuge. From Patreon, we find enthusiasm for our Tiger Belly revisit with Jim Florentine.

Damien McGinn, Buggin' Hyped for this one, Big Guest, a podcast where I used to follow, and some kind of primate. Fudgicle Notes? Well, if Florentine's here, that means no Stutjo segment this week. Brian Vivaro had a good run. I'll have my cyanide capsule close by. Oh fuck. Andy is introducing Paul Rust.

I'm done. Andy is responsible for my death. Hope you're happy Andy. Dash with the chef's kiss. This is why you're the laughing stock of the comedy community, Carl and Friends. Winky face. From Discord, Stormy Enquires. Any weird fetish podcasts about ducks?

Japanese fart enthusiast? Just Carl's. Bean and rice, so pines. Theater faggots are the worst. Hue essay is concerned. Watch out producer Chris. This guy's drops are gonna give you a run for your money. Go go gadget wang.

I think I'd rather see Dat Fan Live. And from YouTube, 76 spazzle writes, Questioning if this is good for me, and now it's funny again. Monkey One. Haha, John is the best. The level of smugness he reaches while being totally wrong is incredible. The facial expressions are just top tier. Ramon makes a couple points. If anyone ever feels bad for this dolt, watch clips like this. This entire dabbleverse came from John not taking a 30 minute roast of his awful show. Even after you're dead and buried John will continue to goof on you. Random Brandon schools us.

There was an old wet brain in the rehab I went to and he acted just like John. You can spot a wet brain by the eyes. You can see the confusion and anger. Chimp in a bow tie. Aww. SJ is so scary when he makes his dumb empty threats. Ross Robertson asks a valid question. How about use that eraser on the pencil and give an apology if you're actually remorseful? Severious Brandusa? Chris D'Lea needs to go away. For life. Fauci34? D'Lea's beady eyes creep me the fuck out the mighty horse rocks That's that must stink of prime energy drink ax body spray and unfunny one Dalia is bad enough at Prio

Oh insufferable may not be the right word But it's the first one that comes to mind and DK 84 plays us out with I guess shampoo was never a thing in the Dalia household And we're back. Kendi, do you have any new reviews you could read for us today? Yeah, I've got a couple. All right. All right. So this first one is from Dustin G. If you like this podcast, I don't get it. It's so painful.

It's like having my wife stomp on my balls with her high heels It is nice, thank you very much for that mm-hmm All right, the next one is by leisure lotion It's titled they sound fat by leisure lotion. It's titled They Sound Fat. The exaggerated laughing would be fine if they didn't criticize other three star podcast for fake laughter.

Uh-oh, that sounds like a three star. Does anybody remember laughter? Is it a one star review, kidney? It's a three star. It is a three star. Oh, did we already hear that one? Is that why? How did you know that? Because they said it sounds like another three star.

Oh, God. God damn it. I'm not paying attention. I'm I. Any other ones for us, kidney? That's it for now. Very good. Thank you. You're doing a fantastic job. I think your performance review will be very pleasant for both of us.

Are you going to start paying me? Come on. She's hilarious. Come on. What? What? W I E T P. Hey, Mr. Hamburger. I just want you to know we stand by you in this evil

piece of fucking shit. John Melendez and what he's done to you and hamburger senior. It is disgusting. It is awful. It is so evil. Like this needs to be said. John Melendez isn't funny anymore. He's not a joke. He's fucking evil. I just had to say that. And just say God bless you and your family, the entire hamburgers. And God bless Papa hamburger too. Thank you very much. That was from Patrick. And the reason why I'm chuckling is I'm watching Steve type. Yes. And I looked down and what he typed was I had to pretend I'm not typing.

But yes, Patrick, I appreciate that. We've got a ton of support and it's very much appreciated. I was messaging with my father this morning and he's definitely blown away by all the support that we've been getting. It's very fantastic, as Tuki would say. It's fantastic. Carl, Brian from Detroit, listening to the emergency, you're talking about John being at the bar spending $48.

He's the asshole that brags about the $48 he spends. Yet he takes no consideration of the fact that he probably runs out 200 hitting people inadvertently spitting, pissing off the bartender. This asshole is so common. I fucking hate these losers. For the fucking worst. Alright, man, go fuck yourself.

Yeah. Bartenders when they hear John talking about the bar, all have the same reaction, like, oh, I know this guy. In fact, Pat Oates is coming back on the show in a couple of weeks. I was just going to say. I got it lined up to come back. I feel like I really bonded with Pat Oates

or with bartending. Yes, when you're talking about the day shift at the bar, it's like, oh, I know these losers. That's like comedians when someone says, oh, yeah, I was telling all kinds of jokes to the comedian on the stage. They, you know, they love that. Oh, I helped their show. Yeah. I helped the show. I was there. Good stuff. Hey, Carl, I know you've heard of it, but you got to review this wall cow podcast. You

got Keemstar who's hosting it and he is clearly doing events for the lawyer to both wings of redemption and boogie2988 is just an absolute dumpster fire. They just recently had Ethan Ralph on and all three of them were doing the Spider-Man meme. You know, all just pointing the finger at each other, calling each other pedophiles and just all kinds of things really. just pointing the finger at each other, calling each other pedophiles and just, just all kinds of things really. And it is just, yeah, you can, you can make a lot of fun of this. I know you can. Just listen to it.

You're going to love it or hate it or bulls or whatever. Clip it and let us know about it. Thanks. Keemstar's local podcast. Pedophile podcast. Sounds fun. Well, no, I mean, Ethan Ralph, we've covered him on the show a few times. A lot of news going on with that gentleman. And that actually might be worth checking out. You were talking earlier during the Suttering John segment of how

difficult it would be to understand what people are talking about if you just came into this because there's only references and it goes so deep with the lore. I feel the same way about boogie and Ethan Ralph and Keemstar. But that does sound fascinating. I'll make a note of that. It's a good suggestion. I'll check that. Have you ever have you ever done horrible decisions when horrible is spelled with like whore? No.

That's OK. So I I I have no idea what it is, but an Uber driver had it up this week and just based on the on the arts. I think it would be a show you would enjoy. I mean, very good. And also based on the Uber driver listening. Kindie, are you familiar with Ethan Ralph? No. Is he your type? Oh, you don't know. Yes, I don't know who he is.

Are you listening? Probably not. Not her. Uh huh. Not her. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Listen, shut up for a second. You stupid fucking blah-blah-blah-blah cut. All right, let's keep it going. Yo, what's up crowd? This is Paco. Yeah, I know Andy's over here trying to be dating or something, trying to win a date with Andy. It's not for me. I got a cousin, like my cousin cooks, cleans, you know what I'm saying? Listens, you know what I'm talking about? All that, all that good stuff. I think he'd be a perfect match for Andy. So, you know, just hit me up if you want to, uh, his contact information. You know what I'm saying? Oh yeah. Um, all right, I'll see you guys later. Yeah, shout out to Mindy, you know. Please don't give a fuck.

You know what I'm saying? I like that. I see you all motherfuckers later. Did he call her Mindy? Yeah, he's paying attention. So I didn't know that we were doing a win a gay date with Andy, but that's a good idea. Should we do that in the same time we're doing win a date with Lucy?

No, let's milk this. OK. Did you notice the one descriptor that Paco left out? What's that? Nothing about her physical appearance Can you seem so sad she done sweat much for a fat girl So this past week we did improv shows week. We did improv shows. He's confused. What's the topic? Hey, call me again. Oh, man. I'm what 17 minutes and 50 seconds into your YouTube stream from

the Wednesday show improv comedy podcast. Oh, fuck me. I don't know if I can finish it. These assholes made me wish I didn't have fucking ears. Yeah, it's not great. The the improv shows. I've not found one that's good yet. Got to be honest with you. And I know everyone enjoys what we play the improv clips on the show.

I couldn't get, I think he got farther than I did on that episode. I couldn't listen to it. Oh, it's the best though. It's the best of these people. I have no idea. Mr. Acula. That was a great idea. Vampire's name.

Vampire Maracula. Maracula. So close. So close. Whose line is it? Anyway, made it look easy. Yes. So many people think that they can do it. And it's just. And I say it all the time. Whose line is it anyway? Probably films for 12 hours for a 22 minute long

show. I mean, there's a lot of editing involved in that. Wow. Well, I mean, there's a lot of editing involved in that. Phew. Wow. Well, I made it through. And you three are souls. Jesus Christ. Carl, you're the obvious winner, though. Get the worst one out of the way to begin with. You know, I watched quite a lot of stuff on YouTube and there's this channel, Scary Interesting, that did a video about the time Belgium basically annexed the entire Democratic Republic of Congo and basically turned all of the population into slaves to produce rubber which was enforced by cannibal warlords, you know, locally employed people.

And the picture at the end of that episode of the man looking at his, the severed remains of his baby daughter, the hands and feet after that she'd been killed and cannibalised by said warlords because he didn't produce enough rubber or whatever was both far funnier and less brutal than your effort there Carl. So I guess, well done. Actually, how dare you? Actually, how dare you? People with a blank. I gotta say, it's not the destination, it's the journey. I know, I think that wasn't what we were going for.

I wasn't sure where he was going with that, but that reminded me of the OP challenge from a few years back. Yes, that's pretty well done. Tom Myers has just as many words. And that guy had a ton of words and it was I mean, I was wrapped. I had to know where we were going. Are those church, it's a. Yeah, you. Dr. D.

Everyone turns out each other. Yeah. I wasn't looking at me. No, look at me. The only new improvised radio program on the Internet. I'm your host, Johnny McFuck withit. Hey, I'm Johnny McFuckwit here and let's go to traffic with Tom Carcrash. Hey, Tom Carcrash, here's a lot of fucking bad drivers out on the street. Back to you. Hey, that was great Johnny car crash. I forgot my name already. So let's go to Cheryl McWether face

And it's gonna rain back to you host of the show hey, it's hosty mckhost and I'm the guy on the host show Wow back to commercials now for 15 minutes while you're driving to work in the morning. That's pretty good. Yeah, it reminds me of interdimensional cable. I was gonna say it's like the end of a Rick and Morty. Yeah, that was pretty good stuff. So I was gonna animate that. I already forgot my name is.

All right, here's another contestant for Lucy. Lucy, listen up. Hello there, I'm calling for the date Lucy type box contest. Just a quick description of myself. I am actually a world class swimmer. I've been told I have a great smile. I'm about 20 feet long and I've also been told that I have eyes like a doll's eyes. So yeah, hope you pick me losing. Oh, I get it. I think it's a shark. Hey, you're that wet shark, aren't you?

Talking about dating references. All right. Moving on. Carl, you're starting to flip with the show. So you had in the six-sixth show, you follow in the formula, you kill off main characters. So you kill off Boomer Guy, Grace. You kill off PJ Filion. You kill off Triple Jesus. You kill off Vic. You kill off Casey. You kill off overrated crows. You're kind of out of standstill now. So it's time for Fulfi's Choice. Gary from San Diego will band practice guy. Make a fucking choice. Wow. Gary, Gary, Gary. Swing in the myth.

Yeah. Protects the impact. This guy at all costs. BPG, I'm sorry, but the Jack of Ladders that we've all received to bought him a couple more years. Sorry, Gary. Amazing.

Gary carves turdips, if that helps. A little bit. Oh, hey, this is Small Penis Carl, right? That's Jim. I was just calling to see if we were going to expect you at the Gay White Power Rally next Thursday. We'll save you a seat. Just let us know.

Did I give all my voicemail number? Shit, I get him confused sometimes. I shouldn't have played that. Hey, it's Sergio from Providence. You want to know why sputtering John's an idiot? Because he missed out on the most obvious nickname for Patrick Melton. Patty Melt. You want to make fun of the guys for being fat? You call him Patty Melt like a big greasy cheeseburger. You don't call him Patty Patty. That's why John is such a hack.

Love you, Carl. That's pretty good. Hold on. I got to go back to the last voicemail. You you thought you being a gay Nazi was news. I didn't think it was news. I was concerned that wasn't my personal voice. Now I was out of the show voice now. Worst kept secret in the devil first.

Oh, that's how that's already out there. Yeah. White claws a hell of a drug. It's good. What? All right. Monday's makes a good point here. Hey, it's Monday's.

I don't know why you guys keep saying John is stupid. Frankly, I think it's pretty impressive and shows a lot of intelligence that a monkey learned how to talk. All right, call me back. Very good. I'm glad that wasn't about Wesley Jones. One more voice coming in for my money manager calling into the show. about Wesley Jones. One more voice. I was coming in for my money manager calling into the show.

Hey, Kyle, it's your money manager. Hey, I've been noticing you're just sitting on money. You're not collecting super chats on Tuesdays or Saturdays. Wednesdays. Well, fuck day you do this. What the fuck, man? Do you like Sam Hyde? Only read $50 or more then you get money You see how that works you dumb fucking mensch do it turn the super chat son milk your fucking fans for all their work They're bunch of fucking pay pigs

Fuck you pay me. I'm a vision to play that one. It's a good strategy I don't want to be calling everyone pay pigs fuck you pay me I should have played that one. It's a good strategy, man. I don't want to be calling everyone paypegs. Fuck you, pay me. Seems like that wouldn't catch on. Shulie sounds a lot different on the phone. Yeah, he puts that on when he's doing the show.

He's your money guy too, Tuki? Yes, of course. You always need a shulie to handle your money. All right, we probably shouldn't be discussing this on air, but he just takes 40%, right? 40? Yeah. 65.

He takes 65? Yes. He said that was a good deal. Two years. You should never give your money manager more than 35 or 40% of your income. Getting ripped off if you do that. All right, guys, I can't thank you all enough

for being on the show with me today. This has been fantastic. Dr. Steve Tukie, Cardiff, producer Chris, Kendi, even Kendi. Especially Kendi. Thank you for being here. Thanks, producer Chris. Remember, we have a bonus show.

We're finally finishing up. Easy for you to say. Centering John's autobiography We'll have a bunch of bonus stuff on there a lot of the Jimmy Dabbles Stuff that we're gonna be talking about So it should be a lot of fun We're doing that Sunday at noon and if you can't join us live You can listen to it afterwards sign up for our patreon patreon.com slash who are these podcasts or you can go on our

Supercast or our YouTube all the links are on our website. Oh, OK, bye. I'm not making the noise for you anymore. What? You want to soak up all my Sunday soupy shots? Mom. Oh, no. I'm not.

No, Carter's mad at me. Man, that was a good episode. That was a good episode. I enjoyed that. Okay, folks! Guess what? The episodes... Oh, waaaaaah!

Jesus, I gotta go. This is getting stupid. Bye, guys. Go fuck yourselves. Have a good week. Ah, Carl. I love you. Ha!

Are we done here? I think we are. Bye, Brennan. This is it. It's over. Okay? Goodbye. Goodbye. Hey, goodbye. Okay, bye. But again, we're only here for one thing. Alright, with the briefcase, we're only here for one time all right with the briefcase we're only here for one thing And that is for me to get the fuck out of here

That's a good old who played that drop that one me My show dog