Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep496 - Brendan Schaub - Tune Town, Golden Hour, TFATK

Episode Date: February 25, 2024

This week we're doing a deep dive into the world of Brendan Schaub. We check out the latest episodes of Tune Town, The Golden Hour, and the Fighter and the Kid. Tune Town is a weird, highly produced show about cars because that’s Brendan’s new hobby. He’s a gearhead who doesn’t know anything about cars. Of course the Golden Hour is always a brutal watch as Erik Griffin and Chris D’Elia both pretend to be interesting. And finally TFATK did their first ever live show in Austin and it was embarrassing. Where’s their friend Joe Rogan? Doesn’t he live there? Mersh from Revenge of the Cis joins the show to help promote our live show coming up on March 22nd. He’s well-versed in the Schaubverse but he didn’t realize that Tom Myers has a weekly podcast so we dig into some great political commentary from the King himself. Then we watch Joe Matarese do a podcast for 9 people (literally) and his latest appearance on MLC where KB continues to try to convince people I should be embarrassed by the mandolin video. Also, Stuttering John gets tricked by reddit yet again, we try to catch an alien, and Maribeth Rosie joins us for reviews and your voicemails. Tickets to the live show in Florida on March 22nd! – http://watplive.com Tickets to the Vegas shows May 31st – June 2nd – https://www.hackamania.com/ https://revengeofthecis.com/ https://onlyfans.com/maribethrosie Support us, get bonus episodes, and watch live every Saturday and Wednesday: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What's up guys, I'm Brennan Chobb. Welcome to the channel. This is episode number four. 96 WCMF. Are you a boner guy? Oh, I was a boner guy. You know what? I miss penis. What are you talking about? I'm the one who should apologize. Is it gonna be absolutely riveting? Is it gonna change your life by any stretch? Probably not, but it's gonna be at least entertaining, okay? By the way, for those people that are in the back, remember to shut the fuck up! Cuz. Cuz a row. Cuz a row. Slapperoony. It's showtime. W-A-T-P. W-A-T-P. W-A-T-P.

Hello, everybody, it's your guys, Bruce. Welcome to another episode of Worldly's Podcast. The only show that's safe space for thick boys. I'm Carl Hamburger and I thank you for stopping by with me today A man who is known for his comedic wit biting political views and on-air strokes from revenge of the sis It's a merch everyone. I feel like I've heard all this before hi Thanks for coming out buddy broken record over here Go to who are these dot com get our email address voice phone number link to our subreddit link to the discord server link to our

Merchandise leader YouTube channel and the link to our page on Supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month. And you can watch the show live when it's aired Saturdays at two Wednesdays at 5pm. Also come and see us. And I mean all of us in the Tampa Clearwater area, Largo, Florida, Friday, March 22. Revenge of the Sist will be there. We'll actually show up for this one. We're going to have two keys going to be there and Cardiff Electric and Dr. Steve.

And I'm glad that we had to restart the intro because of the software fuck up because now we're not going to talk about what a great guy Dr. Steve is this time. Yeah, fuck that guy. I leave all of that in the country for her. Idiot. Also, Hackamania is coming up. That is in Las Vegas,

May 31st through June 2nd. Hackamania.com for more information and tickets to that event. But WATP.com, I mean WATP live.com, too many URLs being thrown around in the first five minutes. Also, we encourage our listeners, give us a five star review on Apple Podcast, then shittle over us in the comment section today. We'll be reviewing Toontown, Golden Hour, and The Fighter and the Kid. So it's my idea to do a deep dive into Brendon's shop.

It's been a minute. And so we are gonna be discussing everything, starting with Toontown. Now Toontown is a show that Brendon's shop does about fast cars and modding cars because he's a gearhead now. Yeah, that's his new thing. He's pivoting. That's his new thing. But he's not a

gearhead. He just likes driving fast cars or expensive cars. He doesn't know anything about them at all. But he does a show about it. Yeah, it's like Jay Leno at least knows about his cars. Yeah, until you burn your face off. I don't want you telling me about your fast cars. Stupid.

There's an episode that he put out. It's highly produced. You could tell he wanted this to be a TV show, probably wasn't picked up, whatever the deal is. This is an episode he put out a month ago it has less than 7,000 views. By Shabb numbers, I'd say that's not great. Doesn't seem like it's going to catch on. I don't know. Maybe it's not working for. Let's see.

Let's see the intro to this video. What's up guys today? I'm here at Willow Springs. It is one of the top racetracks in all the land and I want to learn how to drift. So I sent out the bat signal to one of the very best drifters and he is a badass. It's Andy Haley. What's up guys? And he's teaching me how to drift. Yeah, he looks like a badass. Oh good Andy Hately's on the show. Oh, thank God for that. So it's highly produced. How long before these two have a falling out? You could tell that the production value this is costing a few bucks. You know, you got the drone there that's doing the overhead shot of the race track. You got the little teaser clip that's going through and you got a little bread and shot. He's so hip. He put out the bass signal. Yeah.

And you got all that generic reality TV rock music beds too. Yeah. Yeah. I was trying to figure out what style this is. There's a certain like TV network or something that all the shows look like this. You know who nailed it was Shane Gillis when he did the grill, Sergeant? Oh, I haven't seen that.

We've never seen that sketch. Oh, it's basically Guy Fieri, but if he was a Vietnam vet and kept having flashbacks, but they did the same kind of hokey production value to it, where the generic rock and the cutting to the car and then showing the burger, you know? Like, you're right, there's that style. Yeah.

This would have been huge like 15 years ago, I think. Yeah, I think so. And this, this is coming gone. Yeah. It's every crawl show sketch. Yes, right. Right. Because it does the slow pull out where it's just like, Hey, I'm

Brandon Schaum. We're just talking to the microphone, but guess what? I also have a buddy here. Hey, it's Andy. Let's go right in. Exactly. So, uh, let's, uh, let's check it out for those of us who aren't in the drift world, as he says.

That one is so fast, man. Yeah. And we're putting another 200 horsepower in this year. We're at like 750 ish right now. We're going to be up around a thousand next year with the new Magnus and yeah. That's so cool, man. Check this out. So for those of you not in the drift world, Andy's changing his tires out right now. After every single run, they have to swap the tires out. About a minute of fun, and then you have to switch tires out. Every single time. Yeah, it probably burns a lot of rubber, I would imagine. I'm not even at the drift world, and that didn't surprise me at all. I like that he's complaining already. It's his first day on the job and he's like, Oh, I keep changing these tires. Like, all right, doesn't sound like you like

this then. Well, he's not even doing it. The fuck is it? That's what I was doing. Like, come on, I want to get in the car now. So we got to change the tires out for his friend. Give it a minute. He has to try to sell every aspect of this because this wasn't an exciting day, but they had to make a video out of it So even him putting on a helmet they have to try to turn that into I think a comedy bit. Yeah, I noticed Apparently you gotta wear a helmet during these things You see the tort linear oh Love this thing

Dad what's up, Dan? What's up, Dan? There's no way to look cool in a helmet. Man, he's so good at riffing. I know. You know, he just, he put it on and it was like funny when he's like, what's up, Dan? I like where he goes back and forth between self-deprecation and being the thick boy that he is. He's just like, yeah, don't I look like a dork, guys?

I mean, not really, but I do though, right? You mentioned at the top that he's not a gear head. Right. And I didn't know that when I was watching this episode. OK. But it dawned on me maybe three minutes and it became apparent that he's got nothing to bring to this. Yeah.

Well, even just like showing the engine, they're like, yeah, we're going to put 200 more horsepower. So he's like, nice. Yeah. No, no, no, no. That's going to be fast. That's going to be a follow-up question. Yeah. No, no, no, no. That's going to be fast.

That's what it says. How are you modding that thing? Nothing. Just like cool. All right. It sounds shiny. Is that where the oil goes right there? Where do you put the windshield wiper blue in?

That's also when he's not repeating what people are saying as they're saying it. He has echolasia, which is an actual mental disorder. Albert Baris had it from the Sopranos when they'd be like, yeah, could you believe that guy? Didn't even show up with an envelope? I know. Could you believe that guy? Didn't even show up with an envelope?

Like, it's, there's people that have that disorder and Brendan has it, but he does it while you're saying it, which is even more enraging. It's like, he's literally like, yeah, we're going to go get the tires. I'm going to get the tires. I'm going to get the tires on the car. Get the papers. Get the papers. Yeah.

Can I say it? Well, and we're going to see more of that, especially in the golden hour, because he's trying to hang with the boys on that show. So it's constantly like Tourette's almost. What's the word you use though? Just now, because I, ecolation, I like, ecolation. Yeah. It's ecolasia or something like that.

It's literally, yeah, it's something they have it in. It's a real thing. Yeah. So I just want to point out to Brandon that wearing that helmet is not why people make fun of you. So don't worry about that. So now we have to build up the drama. I got kids.

Imagine this how I go. They call it, he was what what he's drifting in a BMW Tell my kids I was doing something cool right if I go just be like oh, he's racing I'm a person you're seeing that forward verse for our movie. It's like that. So he thinks this is cool That's why he's making this video about drifting. He's like she mentioned embarrassing to me if I died in this super fast race car while we were drifting. I Want to tell my kids I would do something cool like I was a Hamas paraglider going into a music festival Don't tell him I was drifting on YouTube. Don't tell him I was drifting in expensive cars Yeah, I was embarrassing and you know that he's just saying that to be like, I mean, this is pretty fucking cool though

Alright guys tell him I was murdered in prison due to my sex offender status, you know, make up something cool Yeah, tell me me and Brian K Kale gate rape that girl back in 1999. All right. So he is still trying to make thick boy. If you don't know what thick boy is, that's his clothing brand. He's still trying to make that a thing. I have an empty bottle of thick boy of tiger thick whiskey at the house. Oh, yeah. A fan sent us a bottle of that whiskey.

It's terrible. I finished it because one day I just didn't have booze. Yeah. You know, it was one of those bottles. I'm like, well, this is here, whatever. I'm not going to go buy a bottle of whiskey, but it was not great. It was not great. Scope. Yeah, we don't have a problem, obviously. Who a good boys can't drift I fit pretty good to your legs leg room. Yeah, who said thick boys can't drift I wonder if he wrote that ahead of time or if the producer told to say that or if he just set it off the dome Yeah, it's up a dome. You look for a thing who owns a thick boy hat is my buddy blind Mike Erie and he doesn't as a goof Yeah, I was gonna say boy my coast one. It's obviously as a fucking goof.

But let's check out the Thick Boy website because when he said that, I'm like, what's going on with Thick Boy? Oh, it's just the Tampa Bay logo. Okay, yeah, that's legally actionable. You know, it's funny to say that first because I've been doing shows with Mike for a couple of years now

and he'd wear that hat or he'd wear his Yankees hat. And until he announced that it was a thick boy had no idea. Yeah. How could you know? Oh, OK. That looks like that looks dangerously close to Tampa Bay's logo. But what I love about this is that he actually models his own hats on. Of course he does, of course. So if you roll over some of these clothes, you see him making face. Glasses on for this one glasses out for that one.

But my favorite thing that I noticed when I went to this website is that he's got a bunch of things that are sold out. Thick boy mystery long sleeve. Yeah, it's just a question mark. It's yeah. Now this is not even a worst logo. It's just a question mark. But it's sold out. How the fuck does a long sleeve shirt get so this isn't microchips during COVID

Just fucking print up another one if someone orders maybe we never printed them. It's a mystery Look at this. Wait, so is he having like Stock made because like I mean like top lobster does our shirts. He just you know prints them when you need them Yeah, yeah, I mean right. I mean everything is is you can just print one off if you need to. But look, he's got like his chubby boy dad hat is sold out. The thick boy mystery shorts. Who the fuck is buying this stuff? No one is. This is obviously a market because why would you even leave it on the on the website?

Is obviously a marketing point to be like, man, this stuff is in demand. Yeah, this stuff is flying off the shelves. We got to start doing that on our store. Like, ah, man, I don't know when you're going to get those ROTC, you know, Legion of Doom hoodies, man. They're just flying off the shelves. I want one.

I used to work for a t-shirt company website. And the owner of it, we always had, today only, buy four, get two free. Every single day, that was on the home page of the website. It's like, most people don't come to the site more than one. So it doesn't matter. Yeah. What do you got to lose?

Oh, what I'm about this thick boy site, too, is the tour dates page. Oh, no. It was his request to show. Will you come to my house? I can't believe I can't wait to see, like the new appearances are gonna be like the El Cerrito car club Oh, yeah for sure. Yes. Hey with his boys that get him. Yeah, we're peering at the swap meet dude This looks like Chad Zumax website right here That's actually not fair because Chad at least gets a couple of shows

You might have one coming up. Yeah. It's very possible. Okay, so we got to build up the tension more. Let's get back to this video. Are you nervous? Oh. Yeah, you talked to me about being on fire several times. So I was fucking.

I'm a BMW. I don't trust BMWs. If you're just listening to this, it's showing him in the car and he's touching stuff and he's fidgety and these letters are coming up saying like, oh, he sure is nervous. Look at him, nervous laughter. Oh boy, he's not ready for this. He doesn't know what he got himself into everybody. What's going to happen next? I wonder. I hope this car hits absolutely nothing

and explodes anyway. I like you give them credit for wanting to build up the tension. Yeah. And of course the production was trying, but he was just sitting there waiting to go like a little boy just touching things. I don't think there was anything nervous. No, I think I think somebody somebody more clever than him in Editing was like, oh, yeah, we'll make this kind of punch it up make you seem all nervous But you're right He just he looked like a little kid when you strap them in the car seat and then play with radio walk around to get in the car And they're just kind of like

Touching the steering wheel going Toe prints on the windshield You should give him a cookie or something Play with your McNugget body until I get All right, so then speaking of children now the next part of this is them just Driving around and I called this clip. We. Can you believe you got to put new tires on after that? I know, really?

I never would have known that. Honestly though, I mean, this, I can't lie, that does look fun. It looks fucking awesome. But a whole show about like a whole show where I watch you do it. Well, yeah. OK, so this is the payoff. This is the payoff of all payoffs because the name of this video is Brendon Schott learns to drift. So he's just sitting shotgun here as the other guys doing all the work.

So then they're like, all right, now you know how to do it, get in your truck and make it happen. And I've seen a few of the Fast and Furious movies. This is not drifting. What we're about to see Brendan's job do here. It says Brendan driving. Okay, he peeled out and now he's turning. He's just turning.

He's got a signal on. This looks like when we used to do donuts in like high school. Yeah, I think he just made a big stop and stop sign. What the fuck is he doing? Now he's parallel parking. And those were the highlights. Yeah. I would have been like, listen, can you just go in my truck

and we'll film you doing it. And then I can look like I'm cool. Yes. And the guys just like, no, because I need new tires. And we don't have tires. He's got tires. Good point. I can drive home after this. Oh, I got to pull up the video, the comments under this video are very funny.

That's how I know what an old man I'm becoming. It's like when I see somebody in a truck do a burnout nowadays, like I constantly just think to myself, but sir, you're tires. Yeah, what are you thinking? What are you doing, bud? Like we're in a good economy right now. So, Brendon gives off the vibe

he's literally never been near a car in his life. They call him Brenda. Brenda should be required to wear that helmet 24-7. That's great. This is pretty much the worst video ever seen. I'm surprised this is great. I'm surprised they let Brendan near race fuel with how much he bombs. Call ments are funny.

I love Brendan isms comments. Yeah. Wow. Brendan drifts as good as he works on his trucks. This has to make a wish for it all over it. It's just fucking hilarious. He's a buffoon. He really is. All right, let's shift gears. Let's go to the golden hour. That's not a comedy shift gears. I see what you did there. I'm a pro. Let's head over to the golden hour. Now, of course, the golden hour,

Chris, Leah, Eric, Rick and Brendan shop. I'll team up. I got to first show you guys the thumbnails on this YouTube page. Thank God. Carl actually pulls clips before the show because trying to skim through this show is brutal.

It's it's rough. My least favorite part about this are these thumbnails. Every single one is these three assholes losing their minds, laughing their proverbial asses off. I mean, you can pretty much just take any pose of them laughing and put it on any video and call it the show. And that's, you know, what's great too is none of these are from the show You know, they all have to like make a face for the thumbnail. Yeah, that you know

Alright, so let's get into the golden hour and this episode I've watched a few of these and it's usually just devoid of any type of points or reason or anything. Just these guys are rambling about nothing. They don't seem like their friends. No, they don't like each other. It seems like you just took three guys pick three guys up from an airport terminal and said, here's this. Do you do in a podcast now? No, I think the pitch was, do you like paychecks?

You're like, yeah, paychecks. All right, we got to paychecks. You got detention with these other two. Yes. So Eric Griffin actually tries to get the conversation started on the show. This is how it starts off. And I just have to say that this is not a show.

This is not what I would do if I was sitting down with two other comedians and going, all right, let's start riffing on something Do you guys have something that like with your wife that you guys have in common that this is why you know you're with this person? You know I mean like is there like some kind of Well For all the sex trafficking allegations. So I mean, she's a keeper, dude.

Yeah, we both like, did I run a sex call, which is pretty cool. So we got that thing out of course. Why even bring up wives? Brennan Shubb obviously was trying to hook up with Kalilah. That's the whole thing about him cheating. And then Chris Delia is like the most famous cheater in America right now. And Eric Griffin goes, hey, how cute is it that we have our wives with us? Huh?

That fun? Hey, shut the fuck up. He's the only one that marries. Marriage is going well. Yeah. I think that's what he's saying. Marriage, huh? Boys, I'm a right high five.

Eric Grybs like, isn't it great? We have no other options other than your wife and so you can just be faithful to her. Such a simple life. Don't know what that means. Let's see what he's talking about here. I got TV shows, food. No, no, no, because we had this stupid chair in our bedroom. It's supposed to go on the balcony.

It's like an outdoor chair, but it's kind of comfortable and we've kept it in the room, put clothes on it and stuff. But we got all this baby stuff now, so we had to move it. But we moved it, like it's sitting in the stupidest place in front of our dresser, it's in the way, that shit's been there for like two weeks. And then I look at it and I go, oh, neither one of us care.

Right, right, right, got it. It's not a priority right now. But still, it's like, that's the thing that like, You connect on that. Yeah, that's a parent thing. You don't even think about it, but I'm saying, if you're like a neat freak and the other one's not, that's a parent thing. If you don't even think about it, but I'm saying if you're like, if you're like a meat freak and the other one's not,

it's not necessarily gonna work. But is there some kind of thing you guys have with your wife that you're like, oh, this is how we connect? Every drop I have on my soundboard applies to that. Right! And I'm just like, it's rambling, it's unfunny, it's fucking!

Can I point out the big takeaway from this clip though? Is that Brendan is such a fucking idiot, right? That he doesn't know how to connect with another human being on anything but like these eat like, so literally he goes, is there something like a bond you share with your wife that you know you're with the party? He's like, you mean like TV shows or like food? Yeah.

Those are literally the first things he went to. You mean like be outside? No, I'm at like, okay. Like tires? Yeah, yeah, buddy, like tires. So, Chris takes over here, and Brendon Chubb does the opposite of what he's supposed to do on a show,

an improv style show. He does the good old no but, thwarts the conversation. Oh no. That's funny. You know, well, before we even get into that, they say that, and this is crazy but it thwarts the conversation. Oh no. That's funny. You know, well, before we even get into that, they say that, and this is crazy

because I've tried it and I tested it out. If you have one chair in your bedroom, you'll put a bunch of stuff on it, always. Always. But if you put another chair there, you won't put stuff on both of them. Not true. Why, I have to point this out.

Before he does what he's about to do, he just repeated, Crystallia, always, them. Not. Why I have to point this out before he does what he's about to do. He just repeated, Crystallia. Always, always. Yeah. Just like what you were talking about. Cheers. Cheers. That's funny. Cheers. Cheers. You know, well before we even get into that, they say that, and this is crazy because I've tried it and I tested it out. If you have one chair in your bedroom, you'll put a bunch of stuff on it. Always. But if you put another chair there, you won't put stuff on both of them. Not true, depends how messy you are. Okay, but it worked for me. It worked for me.

The test worked for me. Yeah, but you might see some more data. Eight chairs in there with tables and there'll be a swing. And she does go overboard. Yes, yes she will, yes she will. Yes, she yes, she will. It's a rough start. I would kick this guy out of my poker game. Yes, I'm sorry.

Yeah, this was a bad idea. It's on me. It's Eric. We're not talking about bedroom chairs here, sir. We're playing poker. I'm sorry. One more peep out of you. Just look at the porno deck and pretend you like women.

You know, I said this on our show and Carl was on there, but like, for a guy who doesn't drink or do drugs supposedly, Crystal Lea looks like a guy who drinks and does drugs. You know, he looks rough. He's living hard. Whenever he's doing, he's doing it a lot. I like that he goes, you know, I've heard the people say, you know what they say is if you put one chair in,

this happens, two chairs, I've never heard this conversation ever in my life, I don't know what he's talking about. And then Eric Griffin tries to make an interesting, he's like, yeah, I mean, you guys probably put a swing in there. Sure. Okay, why not?

And it's just all like, these conversations, it's just blurred together and it's all therapy taught. It's literally like, yeah, you know, if you put one chair in your room, you'll put a bunch, yeah, you know, if you put one chair in your room, you'll put a bunch of stuff on there. But if you put two chairs in your bedroom, you'll never work another day in your life. Like, wait, what? Are we even having the same conversation?

So this is and Brighton's shop tries to be cool at all times. So he uses weird words like that don't work in the context of the conversation. Like that. So no, like that. So no, I got another example three nights ago. And Kristen was like, Hey, if I stay up late tonight, will you get up with the kids tomorrow? And I said, sure, what are you going to do?

She said, I want to clean the house. So I said, stay up late. You, she says, she says she says I'm locked in I want to do it I have the the energy to do it. I'm locked in she's like that dude. I'm locked in I locked in and So I was like alright if you're gonna clean the place then sure he just said stay up late and clean savage She's all crazy person Brendan job looks like he's doing a skit where he knows he doesn't belong with the other people on the show And it's just trying to fake it so no one notices Well, that's most Brendan job podcast appearance. He's always like panicking and being like say something say something say anything That's where the accolation comes from yeah, he's got nothing so he might as well just say the last word He's got nothing so you might as well just say the last words of the last person

So this is how really right here this is how you know the crystal Leah and his wife do not get along this is proof right here I don't I I mean, I would get general, like last night she made, I can't remember what it was, but she made a joke that was so funny and smart to me. And I was like, God damn, like, you know, sometimes she'll surprise you, like your girl, whatever, like, you're like, not many people would fucking make that joke. And it's on the wavelength that I'm on.

Like just, and I did have a moment last night where I was like, man, I'm like. My wife, she's not like those teenagers. I fuck out of the road. Like she's got a great head. It's unbelievable when she comes up with. This is the guy who's cheating on his wife all the time. He's just like, my wife is amazing.

I never loved someone. He already has a kid and a wife and he's like just now going wow You know what? I'm starting to realize I think I really love my wife. Hey, merch I didn't know what love was until I met my wife. That's that's somebody's cheating I didn't know what love was so I met a woman who has a very high threshold for what she's willing to put up with And I said, you're perfect. And I did have a moment last night where I was like, man, I'm like, it's so cool that she does that. It keeps me stimulated and it's funny and I'm lucky, you know?

So there was that moment then last night. But if you want to get real specific to like a chair's in the middle of the room before the dresser, I'd have to think about it Yeah, he can't think of one thing that makes them compatible I don't know. She's told a joke to my laugh that um, what was the joke? I don't remember. Uh, yeah, I don't know But it was brilliant brilliant He sounds a little afraid so then Eric goes into this really boring story. Like Eric slows everything to a halt on the show. And this show is fast paced.

It's just constant talking and noise going on. But I don't know why they brought Eric onto the show full time. Because I remember in the when we first when we moved, but when she first moved into my place. I answered that for you because Theo was left. And this is the only guy who's willing to work with a rapist. Yes. Correct. This used to be King and the Sting.

Yeah. And then Eric Griffin would come out as a guest a lot. And then Theo Vaughn's like, I got to get the fuck away from these people. Smartest movie ever made the wing, which was. Ridiculous, because they were trying to say that Crystal Lea has a beak. So now he's the wig, whatever. It's also stupid. So that, yes, Eric Griffin gets the full-time gig

to do things like this. I remember when we first, when we moved, but when she first moved into my place, and I was at before, it was like, I had like, I had a honey spoon, I called it. And she was like, what are these baby spoons? And it was a whole big deal. And she like threw my baby spoons away, and I was like, those are baby spoons? And it was a whole big deal. And she like threw my baby spoons away,

and I was like, those are my honey spoons. It was a whole big deal. Is just for you to eat honey? Yeah, just to put honey in my coffee. So cut to. Use the fucking regular spoon. No, because it's one of those bears. I don't got to explain myself to you.

Go fuck yourself, all right? And that's not real honey. There's a whole honey scandal. Nick, look it up. There's a honey scandal. Nick, Nick, Nick, don't look it up. Look it up, Nick. Hey, are we vibing right now? Don't let them honey. Nick Nick. Don't look it up. Okay? They're saying the honey a lot of the honey in stores, it's all face not from these it's all corn syrup, you know

So it's not be so up snooze some of that food. Yeah, I get my honey. Oh by the way, Denver Don't give you a kid honey. You can't have it. the kid have it to like four years old. I mean, if your kids. A little see. But um, what the fuck is going on? That's what this show is. That's right. That's a bit right there in capital encapsulates this show. It's ridiculous. These guys are talking about the diner and they're all talking over each other.

And Brennan shop could be in any conversation. Are we vibing right now? Are we vibing? He's not real. What are you talking about? Yeah. Clearly they think they have some momentum going. Are we vibing right now? Are we vibing? Honey, is that real? What the fuck are you talking about? Clearly they think they have some momentum going. Yes.

This is weird because Nick, the producer, he just heard them call out. That's the other thing about these shows. I know you guys have a producer, I'm Revenge of the Cis, who does a great job. These shows, well, I like them. These shows all have three well, I like these. Three or four guys in a booth somewhere across from them running the show as if it's that difficult to play a video clip or whatever they have to do from time to

time. Oh, it drives us nuts. Me and Roy's bitch about it all the time. Like, like what we could accomplish if we had a studio with like in studio producers doing things like a staff running around grabbing coffee like a desk digital. I'm like, we would be, we would be killing it. But like these guys just come in and like, yeah, you ever have like a chair in your room? That's like, man, I love my wife. Fuck, you just bring something, bring a better anecdote asshole.

Well, yeah, even like Garrett on compound media, like with the the Anthony show and shit like the stuff that they're able to pull up Mead conversation that Got the hosts aren't asking for it and they're able to like pull shit up That it's relevant to what they're talking about or even on the shooley network Got to give huge props to those guys because they're photoshopping shit on the fly and then bringing it up and putting it on the screen as the show Is going I don't know what these assholes do. They do nothing. You mentioned Cumia. I checked him out not too long ago, and he was basically questioning, what is a show anymore?

That was a good question. Yeah. What's going on and on? He's like, I don't know. Everything's a show, so nothing to show. And this is that in a nutshell. This is not a show. It's not a show. They just show up and they just make noise for a while. But was, I didn't see that clip, was he watching Opie at Gebhart's? What he asked what the fuck's his show?

What he wanted? Oh my God, those are bad. They're so bad. Opie just drinking a beer in front of a pinball machine? God, I hate him. He sucks so bad. And then he pulls out these highlights from that show that are the most mundane thing you've ever seen in your life and he's like, check out this.

If you want to see the full thing, watch the show and air it. Guys, if you like the golden hour and you like talk about wives and where to move chairs in your apartment, but you just want more background, ambient noise and like terrible, just drunks yelling in the background, you'll love OPI show.

Yeah, this show would be great if someone was doing really bad a pinball at the same time. You can hear that. Kid guy, right? What the fuck? So, all right, so Nick, the producer went to a UFC match the other night and he's there with three of his buddies and one of the guys is like a male model.

And so, Brett gets very excited about this. He always loves seeing hot guys Like the model on the right. I mean Hold on play the with a model guy. Let me see let me see the action He's the four of them in action. He looks right into the camera and he puts his glasses down It's pretty you know, he knows he knows his poses. Hold on. Let's see Let's see the four of them before you get into what you're like finest. Okay. Yeah. Oh, I did. Oh, he's doing it The guy on the right looks nice

It's good. That's good You know, I like Nick, but I like this. I know your hardcore You showed up for the first prelim as Callan I go this gonna dictate whether you're real fat or not What time did you did you get to the Reno? You're seven o'clock went not a real? He's the guy dude. He's the guy who leaves the baseball game when he or they're gonna win I'm gonna leave. Yeah, you know what I mean those Those guys they don't stay the whole time and that's fine. Oh, dude. He's kind of just chilling right there that guy That's my boy. He was on every Taco Bell in America for like six months. What do you mean on every Taco Bell on outside of it? They had his really of course he was look at him in chalupas look at him dude. Oh, yeah

Liv my handsome bastard all I could think of when he was going pimping chalupas Oh, that's gonna end it into a stand-up act if he's still doing stand-up, which I don't of when he was going pimping chalupas. Oh, that's gonna end into a standup act. If he's still doing standup, which I don't know if he has, I think he retired. That's gonna be a punchline. He's gonna write that down in his notebook. Yes, because I was listening to I think it was Why Are You Laughing? Why Mike Project where they were playing his second special. I don't know if it's showtime or when it was on, but he was not prepared to do a

special at all. He had no material at all. Everything was a setup and there were no punchlines. He would be like yeah It's a club bell pippin chalupas Was it was it the one where he talks about Mexican food a lot? Yes. Yes That was the last one and that was the one that was this independent one. Okay, we watched that too on our show And it's so bad. He's like yeah, wife, I tell her, man, this is spicy. You know, like, okay. It's the one where he stole the Nick Swartz and Fahida's bit. Oh.

About the sizzling and everything. He lifted that directly from Nick Swartz. And not as well. I'm sorry. He left out the fun. Okay, so the name of this episode is Life is a Highway. So when they name the episode this, they must think this is the best bit that happened during the show. So this is it right here, everyone.

I jogged on the treadmill at 4.5 for two minutes. Okay. Then I stopped, then I'd walk for, you know, a minute and then run for two minutes. Yeah. Have you ever heard more boring old guy talk? It's bad, dude. Really is the most mundane subject matter. And this sounds like again, this sounds like three guys that went to college together 30 years ago, and they had one night out like a round of beers and now they're at the diner and everything's all about their bad knees and their fucking nephews and Christmas presidents

and you're like this socks, bro. Oh, that here. And you know, that's what I do. That's good. Yeah, I do a little interval training then I do my weights I'm doing good. That's good. That's good. Yeah, you've been going or no you said you've been out of it Yeah, that's okay though. That's okay, man. You know life's about Life is a highway and you got to write it all dude that song when that song came out When that song came out I was how old was I when did that song come out? I didn't let me listen to it. She said it's too vulgar And when you're cocks and the pussy some pussy in cocks. I mean, it's not vulgar at all But I can watch

It's it had to be so extreme. I mean dude, it's about driving. That's the joke there Eric These are guys in the diner. Yeah. Trying to be funny, but barely trying. Like three dads hanging out after a little league game. When that song came out, who gives a fuck? Oh, this conversation goes on for a while. Sure. They talk about how amazing that song is.

Also, it's a great question to ask me when a song came out. And then you ask me how old you were. How. How old was I then? How old was I? I don't know. You're you. I'm me. Yeah. I don't know how old I was when life as a highway came out. I had no idea. You could tell me 2008. You could also tell me 84. Yeah. I don't believe you. I'm sure. Dude, yeah. I don't know. It's like we've been around, I think. So I always love these guys and I give them credit for this. They're so confident in what they're talking about. They think everything they're saying is interesting. I lose confidence immediately when I start going on about bands

I like or whatever fucking nonsense as you should. Yes, I know. I've learned. You have what a comedian should have, which is the circuit in your brain Oh, I've been going on about this little long. I'm starting to get quiet Yes, but these guys don't have that so now we're gonna figure out because they like life as a highway They're gonna figure out like what other songs they like and this leads to a Amazing tease is probably gonna make them all a lot

of money right here I mean it is it is it's a little bit of a high way my always been bump what's your top five songs all time then oh my god that's tough me my girlfriend with Tupac never had a friend like me with Tupac life is highway don't finish the next patreon okay you can play it guys if you want to know christalie is full top five. We only know three of them right now. We got to go on Patriot and they'll make a Patriot only episode. How did we how did anyone miss the only way you could have made this segment

funny? It was when he said life is a highway. Somebody should have said by Tupac, right? Yes, the only way to redeem this conversation. That would have made it more fun. Yes. And they're all too busy going, ah, yo, no, what is a good song though? So it's this whole show is like a wedding speech that goes on for weeks and long.

Yeah. You're 14. We go like, all right, Uncle Joey, come on, man. You know, we only have this venue for another hour. It's the brother of the groom. And they haven't really had a relationship in 20 years. All the stories are about when they were nine. Dad's been dead for 15 years. Me and my brother listened to life as a highway would come on the radio.

We'd dance around in our PJs. Oh, crap it up. Come on, man. We gotta seriously. Oh, come on, man. We got to seriously. But no, I love this guy back up. But then when he met Jessica, I knew they're taking tablecloths off of tables while you're still giving your speech. The vacuums going. All right. So then they watched this TMZ clip that's been making the rounds. Maybe you've seen it. Danelle Rowlinglings goes ballistic on comedian Corey Holcomb at the laugh factory. So basically what happened is this comic comes up Corey Holcomb and starts talking shit about the comic who was just up before him. And then he comes back and he's like, Hey, I'm still here, motherfucker. Start yelling at him. So they watch that. They don't understand the context of it. They have nothing.

So they just they just watched the clip and have no commentary, but then it's amazing Eric Griffin actually has an interesting story But don't worry. He stops himself from telling it Yeah, I don't understand he is a beast super beast Yeah, I don't know why but Cory like nice to do that. Oh does he I didn't know because it's like because I feel like this is bad This is foul play man. Why I hate what comics do this. Yeah. Well, I mean I can't stand like you like you like you just get off stage Yeah, like you like you like this. I I hate when people do said the comedy store you go on you get off You go again come up next boom and then that person has to say some dumb shit about you Like it's like but when they say it like in a way where you go

Why the fuck would you say that you mean mark maren? Yeah, like yeah, yeah, yeah Neil Brennan did that shit to me one really what he did almost was like oh shit what like what man? As I want oh god, I gotta you know, but I'm just like I don't like that. What the fuck you're named names Yeah, tell the story. It's like oh Neil Brennan. It's a bullshit to you. What are you gonna do? That would be interesting. You're right though, that's a good look let's spice it up this show sucks Tell us this thing like you said he already named dropped the guys and I he's already gonna be annoyed at you the producers like Seriously the only one time Neil Brandon came up in my house and he moved my bedroom chair The only reason why it's like one time Neil Brennan came up in my house and he moved my bedroom chair

And then me and my wife fought for like weeks about that shit. He took off his coat and threw it out of chair They didn't have a second chair Eric Gryffindor also does a black a factor every time hey, you know what up? I'm Eric Griffin So I just yeah, I thought that was so weird that he's finally gonna say something interesting and Crystal Lee is going, yeah, yeah, say the interesting thing. Like if you're gonna drop the name, you've already gone as far as, so then Brendon's job is a hot take

on these two black comedians going at it. And I gotta give credit to Brendon for figuring this out. I don't understand. But Hulkamite has just done it to rile him up. And it goes on and on and on. I don't wanna dip my toe in this pool. There's a lot of beef in the black community. We didn't article It's like a lot of I don't know. I just don't know why you would do that. Yeah, but cats will Smith Chris Rock these guys Based pretty good stuff, huh based

Brandon's Brandon's starting to take the black crime pill Not good But Brennan's Brennan's starting to take the black crime pill. It's not good. Brennan Shops is going to be doing a race realist show when his car thing fails. Well, it's so bizarre because he's doing a white nationalist. He's literally just naming off. What's up with the blacks, B? He's literally just naming off black people have nothing to do with anything. He's like, you know, like Will Smith and Cat Williams.

You're like, well, OK, what do you mean? He ends the list with these guys. These guys, these two guys. Ties it all together. And also, look at, like, I once again, shout out to Eric Griffin for cucking the content again, because they literally go, well, Chris is going, well, let's play some more of it. And he's like, oh, God, play all that.

Like the one interesting clip they have. And he's like, we don't want to make the black community look bad Do something man do something for the show. Yeah, Christian. Bless us. Brendan would be huge on rumble. Yes We got to tell him that's his new colleague So we're gonna switch over to the fighter and the kid they're the first ever live show in Austin And I saw blind Mike was playing a clip recently where Brian Kellen was bitching that they called up Joe Rogan and Joe Didn't want to help them out with their live show. Dude, hasn't Joe done enough for you guys?

He's got to fucking... So they're doing a show in Austin. He literally made you. Yes, I know. Well, Brian Kellen actually had a career in comedy before Joe Rogan. Yeah, but I mean, was he doing... It was on A Respirator by 2015. Right, correct.

So but yeah, so Brian Kaelin calls up Joe Rogan. They do a show in Austin that's not even at the comedy Mothership. It's a Thursday night and they can't even get on the comedy Mothership, Joe's club. Yeah, that's a huge red flag right there. It tells me things are going great. So I want to play this clip, this I pulled from Comedy

Podcast Roast, which is a newer channel on YouTube, but it shows how they were promoting this live show coming into it. I hope so. And then we got live find the kid now to live find the kid in Austin, Texas. Get your tickets February 15th. One show only. Can special guests, very special guests February 15th for

Joe. And we got find the kid live Fire in the Kid live in Austin, Texas. That is February 15th, Thursday night, one show only with very special guest. Yeah, we'll see. It's gonna be exciting. This Thursday, one night only, one show only, me and Brian Callan, it's a live Fire in the Kid, not stand up. It's Brian Callan and myself doing a live find a kid with some special guests

in the capital of comedy these days. That's awesome. Texas. Okay. So the takeaway here is it's one show, one night, very special guest. Wouldn't you say that's probably the takeaway? Yeah, I kind of got the gist. Let's see how he wraps up the actual live show that just happened. Yeah. And we'll be back and we'll next time we're going to have we're going to line up some serious guests. We're going to actually be more organized. Oh, that's a good thing to hear. So that's a good thing here at the end of a show.

We're going to be live in Largo, Florida. Mark Norman is going to be there. Shane Gillis is going to be there. Fresh off his SNL appearance. Joe Rogan. So definitely. But you know, they thought Rogan was going to swing by. He's just like, guys, I'm out of time for this shit Yeah, that's pretty sad dude, that's sad that he can't can't combine his own town for ten minutes

Well, it's literally a block where they are is one block from the comedy mother ship. I'm looking up on Google Maps Oh, no, you know, they were planning the comedy mother shit, and I was like, oh well No, because you know they were planning the comedy mother's and then it was like, oh well. It's right on 6th Street. And it's a Thursday. Like I understand, all right, we got our guys in for the weekend and we can't move them around. We have our shows, but it's a Thursday.

They couldn't get a one. Anyway. We used to, when we would do stand up shows like in towns where nobody knew us, we would go out flyering like the day of and we would just hand out flyers or whatever and that was one of my goatees. So I'd always go, hey guys, we're doing a live comedy our live comedy show tonight people be like oh really? I'll be like yeah I'll be like you like Jerry Seinfeld and they're like oh yeah, and I'm like oh me too. He's not gonna be there

But come check us out anyway. It'll be a lot of fun So now I'm gonna fast forward here to the live show. This is up on YouTube anyone can watch it It's pretty embarrassing and let And look at how this starts off. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Vulcan Gas Company. Just a reminder during the show, keep the talking to a minimum and no heckling now. Vulcan. I've been to a lot of comedy shows.

I've never heard them say no heckling because you don't want to put that word out there. You don't want to put that in something. Oh yeah, heckling. That's the thing that we could be doing at this show. I forgot. Well, yeah, cause there's always going to be to put that in someone's head. Oh yeah, heckling. That's a thing that we could be doing at this show. I forgot. Well, yeah, because there's always going to be people too that, like, me personally, if I go to a show, I'm not going to heckle.

But also, don't tell me what to do. Like, I'm one of those, the minute you tell me, don't say the F word, I'm like, oh, god damn it. I probably wasn't even going to. Guys, I know heckling is cool. I know your girlfriend. You think you're awesome.

It probably is like your dick. Probably get laid. But not also not here. Guys, please know heckling also know smoking. This is an actual gas company. So please, everyone careful out there. That's just like a weird announcement, I thought. But I guarantee that Brian's job is just like,

can you tell him not to hack on us, please? The show keep the talking to a minimum. And actually, it's probably Brian Kalein because Brian is spending so much of his time and efforts into sticking up for his friend, Brendan job. It's a whole time job for this fucking guy. So no heckling now. Vulcan, make some noise if you're ready to get this show started. Even the analogy.

Remember guys, not nice. Yeah. Yeah. Just like, no guys, make some noise if you want to get this thing started. But not happening. Yeah, no heckling related noises. That was pretty good. I think you do better than that is Thursday night in Austin, Texas. Vulcan make some noise. There's a guy sitting right here. I just want to point out wearing a the golden hour coat He's wearing a golden hour. Oh my god. Yeah, it's like one of those silk jackets. I Hope he's one of the producers. I hope he works out the show Wow Oh, Brennan Chubb and Brian Kelley. Listen to the pop these guys got. Wow, the acoustics in this place. The violin.

What's up? What's up, Austin? Bro, this venue is an acoustic nightmare. What's going on? Yeah, it sounds terrible. Oh, yes, it's not great. So, Brian comes up, he's got all the energy. You know, Brian's done stand-up for years. It's not great. So Brian comes up, he's got all the energy.

You know, Brian's done stand up for years. He's a veteran at it. So he should be really good. Getting up on stage probably knows what he's gonna do first. Stop, what's up Austin? What's going on? Thank you for coming out. The Vulcan, huh?

And by the way, we have female fans. I had no idea. Those are the only female fans we have. It's usually just bros. Yeah, there's a lot of dudes up in here It's just usually the bros who cut and then the girls look at us with blank faces So or might me with a blank face you with a hungry face I like the diversity in here too it is well diverse Yeah, oh my god There. He's like, slip right out of the gate. Yeah.

Oh my God. By the way, I have a Brendan just completely like dismisses Callan's point right away. He's like, wow, look, we finally got some girls here. He's like, lot of dudes though. Thanks. Just completely just undercut his whole point. I guess we'll go nowhere with that. I was going to talk to these ladies for a minute. He's not listening.

No, he's definitely not. There's a lot of nervousness that's going on here. The only sold, I think 75 tickets. It's not sold. Bro. It's not a good luck. It's not a good luck. The fighter and the kid.

The fighter and the kid. One of the biggest podcasts of all time. It's really not doing well. One night only. We've already sold more tickets to our WTP ROTC show in Largo. These guys like ROTC post 75 people I'd go well, you know, we only have like so many fans like yeah Fucker way, but like holy shit if you're if I'm not if I'm up there with these two and I still sell at least 100 tickets like what the fuck yeah, it's got a good doing this a bad look

No wonder Joe Rogan wanted no part of this. He pretty much theovod these guys. He's like, no, no, no, I'm not gonna get anywhere near you at all. Smell it from a block away. Yeah. So this only gets worse. This is bad. Only fucking getting younger.

When's the last time we were on stage together? 18, 17. It's been a long time. I'm getting younger. I pulled a muscle in my neck, drying my hair. That's a true story. I went like, and I went, ah, fuck, and I'm fucked. For the next 10 days, I pulled a muscle in my neck, drying my hair, that's a true story. Like I was, I went like, and I went, ah fuck, and I'm fucked for the next 10 days.

I know I am. And how annoying is it when your buddy, when you're telling somebody he's like this? Yeah, I know. He's moving into your mind. You move your neck like Robocop right now. I know, at least we're here. Why do they call it the Vulcan gas company?

Does anybody know? Me neither. Nothing? This wasn't a gas company once? Probably not. Probably should have researched. Imagine if it was though, huh? Wow. You just got nothing. They just arrived there? That's crazy. This is live podcasting everybody. Now, if I hadn't been on stage with Royce in years or whatever, and, you know, a little rusty, whatever, right? Like I would get an opening act.

Yeah. Right? Like remember Dick, when he did Road Rage, he had that fucking crazy dude, the rapper guy who was nuts. Yes. And like goused himself with water and like went fucking crazy. And then like, you need an opening act like that. So then everybody's hyped.

Like they just were like All right, no heckling you guys want to start the show Here's these two dipshits And they're just coming out like is this a real gas company? And now they asked someone to front bought a jacket for this. I love though the bright gallon. I mean, obviously, if you're doing a live show, you're a comedian. You're thinking of a few bullet points before you get up on stage, right? Of course. So some local stuff like whatever.

He immediately goes to pull the muscle washing my hair. What? Yeah. There would be pitiful on a podcast. This is a fucking comedy show. So bad. Someone in our discord posted a photo of the theater that we're playing. Completely empty and assess that the crowd goes wild. This one we're watching right now is my nightmare.

This is my stress dream. I'm done a show like that. I did a I did a 1500 seat theater one time and I think a hundred and twenty people showed up All right, so then Brian tries to to make this funny this one's things you just name it huh? It's called the Falcon gas company Right, you know that's how you do it. This call is good Vulcan because it's like Gas oh You want to hear vocal? Vulcan was poppin. This was the spot. This was a lot

I love this place and then Rogan said cool story and then fucking right across the street, dude Yeah, but I like this place. It's I it's got a good reputation and we're here And it's about to blow the fuck up when they find out You know how when the Beatles they found out they were playing on a roof Yeah, I will say though Austin is alive in comparison There is some energy if you look at I'm gonna mute this you're panicking just look at Brian's leg as he sits down on his stool here See his leg is just trembling well his legs are always jumpy. He's one of those fidgeters He's always jumping his leg, but he's I'm more concerned about the look over to Brendan and then Brendan's doing the nervous sip

They're sharing a moment of like, bro, we got to pick, we got to pull the stick up here and soon we're going to end up crashing into I-75. Yeah, thirsty real quick. I love that they have to make reference to the fact that there's a much better comedy club right across the street. Yeah, way to highlight the fact that you couldn't get there. It's not that you couldn't book that venue. Folks, we're going to have a quick meeting backstage

and start the show over. Is that OK? Yeah. I like, yeah, we're going to huddle real quick. We're going to call an audible here. Yeah, you know what? I want to make sure too that when we open up with WATP Live, WATPLive.com, March 22, I want to start the show the show and I'm gonna open up just discussing the various other venues that they have

Choices on where they could go, you know the bar across the streets really kicking man. That's go check that place We realize you have a choice in venues Actually, we'll tell you to go to the other one. Yeah This place used to be cool and then the better place opened up. Okay, cool. Brendan Shops gonna save the day everyone. I'm happy to report because he's gonna start making fun of the homeless people and he's got a new word that he wants to use.

The homeless here I just look at I go, summer is coming. They don't like that. They don't like that. Yeah, your homeless here are bad shit crazy though It's not also listen. I love Austin like six Street. Dude. It's ratchet as fuck here. What are we? I I wake up every morning look at World Star hip-hop. There's four videos from Austin on six Street every fucking Tuesday It's it's so ratchet out there. I it's ratchet a half. It's so ratchet out there dude. That's a sir that We retired ratchets as a wigger as a recovered wigger.

We were tired ratchet back in like 2018, bro. Now, he's pretty happy. Maybe you don't know if you don't know. We were using ratchet like 12 years ago. I think Obama outlawed. Obama is like, retards out. Ratchet is definitely out. If you don't know the backstory of that, Mursh, Sutter and John once informed me that I can't use the word retired

because Obama banned it. What? He thought that we really thought that was true. He's like, Obama made it so we can't say that word anymore. I went, well, Obama's no longer the president, so you're a retard. Stuttering John is a he's a precious gem and he needs to be protected at all costs He's so unintentionally funny. Yes All right, so now we're gonna go into uh, hey you guys from austin you guys from texas you guys farmers when you guys farmers and stuff So then brian kalen goes into his gentleman farmer bit

I don't know if he uh was planning on doing this, but this kills Does he realize Austin is now mostly tech jobs? Yes Realizes what Austin is not taxes is the opposite of Texas He doesn't need some block like me if I'm in the if I'm in the Austin son on my farm I go I would I get so fucking pink and then I That's the thing about Texas like the son and the farm life isn't for you right now I want it to be about Yeah, dress like a farmer.

Elon Musk wearing overalls. He's got a straw hat on. He just wants it. Someone milk the cows, please. That's how I would be. Dude. I mean, your hands are terribly strong. Someone massage my calves.

I want to be that guy. I want to be like a gentleman farmer who has land. I want land. And if there's a coyote near my chicken, someone release the hounds. And he won't let him kill the cow because he's too cute. I know. I know. He's cute. Don't kill that one. Bring me something soft for my hands.

Bring me the small you. Why is his Texas farmer British? He's a gentleman farmer. That's the bet. He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer.

He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer. He's a gentleman farmer. Bring me the small you. Is now why is this Texas farmer British? He's a gentleman farmer. That's the bet. But he's British. Right. Because that's what gentlemen are. They're all British.

Wouldn't you do like a I would do more of a Lindsey Graham. Yeah. Mint julep accent. Not like a bring me my cows please. You don't think this is working? Is that what you're saying? Merch. No.

Did I over stop it? No, it's not. Oh, it gets worse. Please you don't think this is working. Is that what you're saying? No, it's not oh it gets worse It's not what is never isn't a female sheep of you, you don't fucking know. Yeah, you're not a real farmer Are you I've never used that word before but would you actually move here be what would get you here? Okay, this is great. So but would you move here be, but would get you here. Okay, this is great. So, but would you move here be? And this audience reaction to that perfectly sums up this live show. Listen to this. But would you actually move here be? What would get you here? You know, I got a, yeah, I would.

Single person. That's worse than silence, right? I'm from here. Is that worse than silence, right? Yes. The sound of one man clapping. Oh, man. Pretty much frames it.

Especially in that fucking echoey dungeon of a bar. It's not great. Is that, you think it's the guy with the jacket? It's got to be the guy with the jacket, right? The golden hour guy. Woo. He's like, I got the last one from the website. You're sold out. It was sold out. I was gonna get a thick boy long sleeve, but alright, so just a few more clips here. So they're talking about how the comedy scene in LA used to be awesome.

All the comics would be there hanging out and then that all got ruined. And we'd be in the parking lot laughing till two in the fucking morning being silly geese. And then that goes away. It just went away. Well then COVID hit, COVID hit, then a Me Too movement hit.

Yep. And then. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, the party was over there. And then I was like, where'd all my friends go? Yeah. That's what happened. What happened?

Yeah. That's weird, because what he's referring to is Brian Kellen and Chris D'Alia both got hit with rape allegations. Yes. So silly. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's like, yeah, they remember me too. And I was like, where did everyone go? And Brian's like, yeah, I'm sitting right of me too. And I was like, where did everyone go? And Bryce looks like, I'm sitting right fucking.

Brian actually was off the show for a while. Yeah, they shoved him in front of a bus. Yeah, they were like, all right, Brian, you got too much heat. You got to go. They brought in two black guys to sit with. Brian and Chab, that was fighting the kid for a while. Go hang with Crowder for a while. Yeah, I was like, but I also, yeah, I love the fact that he's like, yeah, man.

It's like, we used to be up till two in the morning, just being silly, having a good time. And then everybody started holding us accountable for all the rapes. And then I was like, where did all my friends go? Oh, yeah, the rapes. A bunch of nitpickers. Yeah. And then these guys called the FBI got involved and ruined all of our funds. They're seasoned phones.

And then we can't text each other to go like coordinate our hangouts. Now, this is the douchiest moment of the show. That the fund we were having was innocent. It was fucking beautiful and artistic. And all we did as a group was make thousands or hundreds of thousands or millions of people laugh.

Yeah. Whether it was on podcasts, I'm talking about all of us, not me and Brennan, but everybody, that's all we did. Right. It was great. And then somehow it became, you know, it got weird. It got weird. It got weird.

It got weird. Things got weird. Things got weird. And then also, oh man, Basically the way I'm translating this is they're like, you guys used to like us, remember? Yeah. We had all these fans and all these hundreds of thousands of views and all of our shows.

Can we have those back please? Yeah, what happened? Like they're just asking for it back. Yeah. They're like earning it back. Can you guys tell the trolls on the sub right at the stop being so mean? I thought it was gonna take more of a nosedive.

He was like, and now we have this. Yeah. Tonight. Yeah. You assholes. Right. That was so weird. Like all we ever did was like millions of people laugh and I don't know why we're getting punished over here. I don't hear you guys laughing. What a cope at the end. He's like, but it's all right. It's fine. He got weird, but it's fine. It's all good. We don't care. You know what? I like small. I like smaller venues. They're more intimate. It's fine. It got weird. But it's fine. It's all good. We don't care. You know what? I like smaller venues. They're more intimate.

It's intimate, yes. It's always the move. Okay. So, now he's trying to convince everyone that they're having fun doing this podcast. I think they're trying to convince themselves. This is fun. We're having fun. This turns into rambling.

And I feel like the past six months doing the podcast has become fun and different and exciting again. That's what's weird. Maybe it's just because you go through some shit. Yeah, I think we both got too busy. Yeah, yeah, too, yeah. Like, you know, it's a dry, like, I'm sitting on fucking a set doing a sitcom.

Yeah, he's fucking all that shit. It's just like, it's not, there's something about, like, there's something about success when it becomes commercial that is anti-artistic. I think that to be, if you wanna stay innovative and different and funny, you've always gotta feel a little bit like your clothing is too big for you. You can't be too cool.

You can't feel like you're too successful. You can't that that attention that public embrace sucks. What? So so so working on a television sitcom making scale. Yeah. It was terrible compared to being naked or dressed like a cow and being whipped by a naked Crowder. Yeah. This is such a cope right now that he's going through just like I don't even want to be successful and have everyone adore us. That would be terrible if everyone liked us and thought we were actually funny and interesting

that I'd hate that. I hate having so much money and I have to count it all the time. So much money. I have to hire people to count it. It's crazy. I'd be so pissed. Flying first class. If I was in the audience it's like I came here. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad.

I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad.

I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad.

I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. I'd be so glad. It was like, you want to do a live show? Because it's weird. We're doing a show and there's no chance for feedback. You could just say, it was a great show. We had fun. We were laughing in the studio. Everything seemed fun. When you're on a stage and you're being your silly goofy you and no one cares and you're getting silenced, it's brutal. And that's what the show is for 30 minutes.

So then 30 minutes in, this is what they go to Let's get weird fire away Just do fan questions and there's no order to this You'd think that there'd be like a microphone set up somewhere. People can form a line, get up, talk to them. It was just like, just fire it out. They told us not to hackle, sir. I'm sorry. I'm still following the rules. They said, keep the talking to them.

Yeah. No, no, no. It's inviting. Is that OK? You're sending a lot of mixed signals here. Yeah. It's a lot of pressure. Can someone just yell something at us, please?

So it seems like there's people here? Yeah, there was no enthusiasm from the crowd. Yeah, no no we want to do questions like dude We've heard you guys talk for a billion hours. I have no questions for you. I learned everything Did you try to fuck Lila or not? That would be my We're ten minutes away from everybody going hey, you guys just won't go across the street get drinks It's the whole point for you. I haven't seen that Eskimo bro shirt in 10 years. Oh, dude. Dude, that's an old school fucking shirt.

That's where you know the show is going very well. When you start putting up shirts in the audience. This is this is fucking brutal. Dude, I was so happy as I was doing my branded job deep dive today that they had just done this live show. I was like, oh, this is perfect. That is brutal.

I could do an entire episode just on this podcast episode, but that was just a few clips. How much were the tickets for that? That's a good question. I'd be curious to know. I don't know. I can't believe they could sell that out. I paid more than 10 bucks for that. I'd be furious.

Maybe they were out flyering. Well, honestly, if that was in Rochester, I, maybe they are out flyering. Well, you think? Honestly, if that was in Rochester, I would have gone just for the spectacle. Oh, the train wreck is not to keep bringing him up. But Blind Mike does these things where he gets all of the gear heads together and they went and saw Brandon Shabdoo stand up and they went down and saw Tom Myers. And it's like, I just want to see a train wreck.

Yeah, I would. I would have gotten to this. Oh, fuck. Yeah. They could have. If it's in like Tampa, I would have been like, I'm going. I would have gotten to this. Oh, fuck yeah. They couldn't step out. Yeah, if it's in like Tampa, I would have been like, yeah, I'm going. I would have been that soul clapper in the audience. Woo! All right, guys, it is time for our... Bridge of the Week, Bridge of the Week. This one comes in from Jody B. And unfortunately, it's my buddy Doug from Who's Right. Doug has a woman on the show he's talking to

and this does not go well for her. Uh-oh. Lindsey. Yes. Can I smell your pussy? That, that's, that could work. Is that dark? No, I'm asking her a question.

You'd have to drive real far. OK, can I smell your butt or no? I don't think your wife would appreciate that. Can I smell your pussy? Mal, look at you there. You're supposed to say no. Fuck. The whole show's over now.

The whole show's you offended her. Here you go. OK, so when I ask you, you're supposed to say no. OK. Can I smell your pussy? No. Here you go. Okay, so when I ask you, you're supposed to say no, okay? Can I smell your pussy? No. Then it must be your feet. My feet?

Are you one of those kinds of guys, Doug? Forget it. Moving on. What do you want from me? All of that went over your head. All right, anyway, question to you, Tom. He's trying to nicely tell you that your vagina smells bad Yes, oh Okay

Lindsay I said can I smell your pussy you say no I say oh it must be your feet then oh Ha you explain it gets funny you know that if you didn't walk across the room to get your fucking cat. Good. I was around. Sorry, Doug. Oh, sorry about that. Who makes you feel better about myself? You know what else makes you feel better about myself is listening to this asshole. You know, it's no different than, you know, police officer running to the scene of a crime

or a firefighter running into a burning building. It's what I do. I'm a hero. Wow. Tom Myers versus the rest of the world has a new episode up. I was checking it out as I like to do. And are you familiar with this show, Mers? I'm not familiar with his show, but I'm

very familiar with Tom Myers. I became familiar with him due to come town because of Nick Mullin. Just if they got they shit on him so much. But yeah, I know Tom Myers would be a very angry guy who will take any bait. Yeah. So Tom Myers is from Baltimore where Stavros is from from come town.

And that's why he got on the radar of come town. And that's how we all know. Yeah, because they were all like doing comedy way back in the day. And that's how they became, you know, so familiar. Stavros was in the front row at one of Tom's specials that he was recording. You could hear Stavi laughing throughout the whole thing. It's great. Yes.

That's one of the ones I like I remember listening to was when they him and his brother and they were all there just good like just left And I think I stop roast did the the fighter and the kid thing at one point he did the Yeah, exactly so He does a show Tom Myers versus the rest of the world it's him with a panel He invites some other people on Jeff Heisen some other people that will get introduced to and he does a political show Now if you don't know Tom Myers, he is a staunch Democrat. He believes everything that the Democratic party tells him and that

the news media tells him, and he writes jokes. He does a monologue on his show. He thinks he's like Bill Maher. So let's start off with the first joke. I know that you follow politics a little bit. I think you're going to enjoy this style of humor first. Hello, and welcome to Tom Myers enjoy this style of humor first. who flaunted his classified documents to the point where the only way he would piss off the National Archives more would be if he streaked through the building.

All right, I have a couple of things I want to say about that joke. What's great about Tom Marzies, because he's himself savvy when it comes to politics, and then all his punchlines are like, and then he took off all his clothes and ran around the building. Like, well, that's the sign as anything to do with politics.

But I love that setup right there. He goes, yeah, you know, the special counsel said that Biden didn't do anything wrong. That's not what they said at all. They said he's so incompetent and has dementia to the point where no jury would convict him because he has no idea what's going on. It was very embarrassing for Joe Biden. He had to do a press conference saying, it's not true. I got my shit together.

This fucking idiot, Tom, I just goes, yeah, they said he didn't do anything wrong conference saying, it's not true, I got my shit together. This fucking idiot, Tom Rogers goes, yeah, they said he didn't do anything wrong. Like that's not what they said. All right. So he doesn't like Trump. No, get out of here. Yeah, so he's got a joke about Trump's speech in Pennsylvania. During a speech over the weekend,

Trump said that if he lost the election, then they would change the name of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, which may work that way. His supporters would be able to spell the new name. Was that the joke? Yeah. So the panel, the panel, the panel on this show has been trained to laugh when he stops talking because there's no way to know what the punchline happens. I want you to listen to this again. I'm just going to play the end of this. Listen to how the

panel each laughs one at a time, which is not how laughing at a joke works. His supporters that his supporters would be able to spell the new name. So bad. Because the last one was like, oh, we're laughing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, harmonizing their laughs Okay, that was a pretty good joke though, you have to admit right yeah, it was because they're dumb Sporters can't spell. Yeah, exactly. Okay, so Mary Ann Williamson just dropped out. She was looking to be Going up against Biden to be the press. Was she crazy crystal lady? Yes.

Okay. I remember her. I think that Tom Myers wrote a headline and then wrote these series of jokes. Mary Ann Williamson suspended her presidential campaign in the Democratic primary. When did she start? This is a good move. If she wants to help shore up those anti-biden Democratic votes Maybe she can help Dean Phillips get to the point in the polls where you can see the little bar on the polls without needing a magnifying glass

Hell maybe she can get Dean Phillips to a full 5% of the Democratic vote I didn't see you laughing over there. Wait, that was oh my god That was the joke. Maybe didn't hear it. I'm gonna play it again. No, please. No, no, that's fine Don't play it again Shit, there was a three-parter these are these are bad by Tom standards these these jokes Yeah, no, no, no Tom like Tom at least has had like I've heard him tell jokes before where I at least understood it was a joke. Huh? One very funny, but like some of this is like I don't even know like that's why I was silent. Yeah, because I was waiting for him to finish. Oh, that was it, huh?

Okay, there were three different punchlines according to him in that little clip. And now this might be one of the worst bobs even for Tom Myers that I've ever heard right here. Former Maryland governor Larry Hogan announced that he'll be running for the U.S. Senate seat this November in an effort to replace the state's retiring Democratic Senator Ben Cardin. I'm not sure he can successfully win in a post-Trump Maryland even in a post-Trump Republican primary Considering he's the only cancer patient. I know who went through treatment and still fail to lose weight in the process That's dark. Can you believe that? That's dark. He's like, can you believe his cancer patient's fat?

Good one. Good one, Tom. It's a good rubber to get there. I know. That's actually funny if you just go there. Yeah. Maybe the cancer patient had a bong hit transplant. What do you put in radiation and cheeseburgers?

It's easy. It's easy. It's easy. It's easy. It's easy. It's easy. It's see? It's easy. Tom, Jesus, man. Carl summarizes it perfectly. This is bad by Tom's standards. It's brutal.

And it's also jokes for it's so inside-bed. I follow politics. We do political comedy on ROTC. I don't even know half the people he's talking about. I know. This is deep like DC shit. Like you'd have to hang out in like journalist bars in DC to understand half of these people they're talking about. You have to give a shit and think that politics means something in this country in order to follow this.

But I do know that you know who Matt Gaetz is. Oh, of course. Of course. Because Matt Gaetz likes to traffic. Pensacola Gaetz, baby. He likes to traffic teenagers across state lines So Tom's gonna get a Florida thing Tom's gonna get him good with this Florida congressman Matt gates Said he wouldn't watch the Super Bowl because it featured the song lift every voice and sing also known as the black national anthem

and sing also known as the Black National Anthem. This is the same guy who would only watch the Miss Teen USA pageant if it took place in his bedroom. What does that mean? By the way, I love that that's gonna stick to him forever when if they wanted to nail Matt Gaetz to a fucking cross, they would have done it. So it's just, I love that they're still doing that. Oh, Tom holds on to any accusation.

He's still making Russia jokes, Russian collusion jokes with Trump. It's like that was, we figured out that wasn't the case years ago. What do you do? But he just holds on to all this shit. It's great. All right. Here's, here's his RFK Junior joke. Get ready. He just holds on to all this shit. It's great. All right. Here's, uh, here's his RFK junior joke.

Get ready. Robert F. Kennedy, junior apologized for misusing his family's images in a super bowl commercial. No word on whether he'll apologize for not being the Kennedy junior who took flying lessons. The one guy started laughing because he thought he had already stopped talking. Did you notice? He's like? Oh, there was a joke. OK, sorry. I was thinking of something funny. I was thinking of family circuits. My bad.

Dude, honestly, Terry Gross is funnier on NPR. Yes, it's brutal. All right. So it hasn't been funny yet, but it's going to get better because I know that, you know, that Drake's penis is making the rounds on the internet. And in the hands of a comedic genius like Tom Myers. A leaked video of the rapper Drake playing with his penis made the rounds on Twitter X.

Now I know what he meant when he signed the lyric, we go zero to 100 real quick. What does that mean? Do you think he knows how penises work? No. Yeah. They think they go fast. Yes, you're 100 has to do with miles per hour. We're talking about.

I'm going to shoot my piece across the room so fast to you. This guy's never had sex. No, obviously. Oh, this this next joke. Jeff Heisen's never had sex. No, obviously. Oh, this next joke. Jeff Heisen's reaction to this. So, Jeff Heisen's this like 80-year-old lawyer who tries to do stand-up.

We've played his stand-up on this show before. He is even less funny than Tom somehow. And his reaction to this joke is so telling. A woman in Catonsville, Maryland celebrated her 109th birthday by playing bingo. I'm glad she's having fun, more power to her. She's doing something she enjoys. It's very low key. I hope she keeps it low key

and doesn't get too excited when she wins and yells out bingo. So, I'm guessing she dies. And guess she died show. Yeah, the joke is, you know, hopefully when she wins, she doesn't die. yelling bingo. And Jeff Heisen, sound like he had his head in his hands. His face and his hands are just like, oh, what are you doing? But I also love like everything with Tom Myers is like local Maryland.

Like he's still doing the same spiel of like a hundred and one year old Maryland resident Esther, you know, Silverstein. It's like nobody knows this shit, Tom. I'm not reading fucking Maryland Times. Oh, you mean that woman who got off on exit 78? Is that what you're talking about? Yeah, I know. Tom's the only asshole that still gets the Baltimore Sun like delivered to his house.

Probably. Well. He reads it. I only have a couple more clips, but I do have an example of exactly what you're talking about. But first, we got to introduce the panel. Please draw me a welcoming Jeff Heisen, Gina Brown, and Chip Jones. Hello.

Hey, Tom. Everyone, welcome back. Thank you. Gina, haven't had you around for a couple of weeks. You notice, I know Tom's show better than Tom does. That's where Jeff Heisen already has a preplanned quip that he's going to put in. And he's tried to start talking,

and Tom cut him off to talk to Gina Brown first. I'm just going to back that up real quick. Because he didn't like the bingo joke. That's probably why. He's yeah, I'll punish you now. Sandbagging each other. Thank you. Gina, haven't had you around for a couple weeks. You've been pretty busy. Tell us about it. I've been busy.

Yeah, I am. I was one of the four finalists for Sherry's Funny Over 50. So she's drunk, right? Well, I was drunk and I can I know what drunk when I hear one. She just said she is one of the four finalists in the Sherry's Funny Over 50. She is referring to Sherry Shepherd, the daytime talk show host. And I have no idea who any of these people are. I don't know who any of these people are.

This is local. This is, no, this is natural. This is Gina Brown talking about how fun it is. We're going to have a real good time. I'm Gina and I'm a mom and a bit of a Renaissance woman. I really am a performing storyteller that was just stuck in the corporate closet for so long, but now I'm out of the closet. I'm here.

I was never a class clown. That wasn't me, but it's my facial expressions, like forever, particularly colleagues that like don't sit across from Gina in a meeting. Do not do it. She's, she won't be able to get through the meeting. I mean, I really find comedic elements in all aspects of everyday life. Can you imagine? Someone goes, all right, just need to shoot a promo about how funny you are. Be like, go fuck yourself. I'm not going to do that. I just make these facial expressions.

People lose their minds over it. I'm just so funny, just naturally. I can't help myself. I can't help but cringe. Anytime somebody is telling me how good they are, like anytime somebody's doing their own bio or something, I always just cringe. It's so hard to watch when they're like, you know,

people say I'm a performative storyteller. And I would shut up. I'm a Renaissance woman. You're a Renaissance woman. She's starting up by saying, I have so many talents, you can't even fucking believe it. I wanted to knock her teeth out with a fucking croquet mallet. This is a woman who has the time

to be on Tom Myers podcast. You're not that important, I promise you that. She led with, I'm a mom, of course. But I also love the idea that, you know, I've been cooped up in corporate America and not able to spring my talents onto the world with all these meetings that I'm in. All right, so let's get back to Tom Myers versus the rest of the world. A couple more clips real quick. Though there's a one of the guys on the panel has a tag for that Drake joke

that Tom told. And then that's going to get into Tom's Super Bowl material. One one correction though. You I think you misrepresented Drake. I believe he was on Twitter triple X. I think is what. Hey, the Super Bowl must have been a rough game for conservatives and Trump supporters to watch. Wow. He knows. Yeah. So wait, wait, wait, he knows. Sold them, huh? Yeah. Wait, so wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

So they're required to laugh at him. Yes. But he doesn't have to return the favor at all. Not at all. Wow. Well, what's ridiculous too, and I didn't point out we played the clip earlier, when he said the Drake thing, he goes, it's been going around Twitter X one or the other time. Yeah, Twitter X.

It's not Twitter X. It's X or whatever. Let's get, let's get to do a Super Bowl joke here. Bowl must have been a rough game for conservatives and Trump supporters to watch. On the one hand, you have Taylor Swift's boyfriend's team. On the other hand, you have a team whose home is a sanctuary city. That's enough to give one of them an aneurysm. And to those who say I shouldn't joke like that

because someone actually could have an aneurysm over that, good. What? Could you make sense of that one, Merch? Cause I'm lost. Can we go back to the fighter and the kid live? One more clip. Can we go back to Brendan Shaw I'm talking about One more clip. Can we go back to Brendan shop talking about truck tires? This is brutal

This is so bad one more clip from Tom Myers. How does Tom get worse over time? He's doing this for like 20 years. He's getting way worse, which is incredible But what's amazing and I'm so happy this is the case is a Tom does a podcast where he sits and writes jokes for every single show many many jokes I Love it. It makes me so happy. I don't wait for his next stand-up special I just gonna watch him try to write jokes every week so this is incredible because He's a big Baltimore guy the Ravens made it to the AFC championship game as we know

playing the chiefs, not the bills. But. And apparently there was a promo that was cut by another famous Baltimore Terrian, Baltimore, Deon, Baltimore, more and Baltimore and he is not happy about it. Prior to the AFC Championship game where they were set to take on the Kansas City Chiefs, my hometown team, the Baltimore Baltimore Ravens posted a video on their Twitter X feed Featuring a caricature of a Ravens fan by podcaster and comedian from what some people tell me Stavros Halkias Oh, no Stavros is so famous that the Ravens are having him cut promos are having him cut promos for the big game. This is kind of really pissing off.

Okay, that has to hurt. Okay, so let's see. Well, because Stav also does the really good accent and he does that stupid Dundalk accent and he looks like Baltimore trash. Like he's perfect for a fucking, I'd hire him too for Raven's promo. And let me just say this,

I've seen Stavros perform stand up twice. He's fucking hilarious. He's a very talented guy. He's fucking hilarious. He's a very very funny If you want to imagine what the video looked like imagine someone who looked like he was conceived at and Born nine months later at the sewage treatment facility in Dundalk He's perfect for a Ravens promo I love these throw it out, you, that sewage treatment plant down the road over here.

Yeah, you guys know by the old Baltimore Sun Building, by the train tracks over at Patapsco. Come on, you've seen the wire. You know, the problem is, is that to understand Tom Myers jokes, you have to have seen season two of the wire specifically with the Docs. Yeah It's actually my favorite and then imagine him doing a caricature of a Ravens fan If that's too much of a visual for you, then just imagine what it looks like when a dead body actually eats the maggots You know, this makes me wanna see the fucking video. I know I looked I looked for it I couldn't find it because I have to get the same thing.

I want to play this. Oh, no wonder the officials made the calls they did against the Ravens. They were like, who do we want to the Super Bowl? Taylor Swift or this guy? Even Lamar Jackson saw that video and said, what the fuck am I even playing for? In a way, Stabros Halkias is the archetypal Baltimore sports fan, an overweight, balding racist. The same person at the Baltimore Ravens organization who thought it was a good idea to post

the Stavros Halkias video was likely the same person who said, hey, Lamar Jackson can do a great job at running the ball in this probably the most important lead up to the Super Bowl. I don't think Tommy understands football either. What? The same guy who decided to use Stavros in a promotional video is the offensive coordinator for the Baltimore Ravens. Is that what he's saying? What is he talking about? There's a coaching staff for that, Tom. Very different than the marketing department. What is he? He's so upset with Stavros. He's like, yeah, he's fat and he's ugly. He's shoe worn.

He's shoe worn this in just so we could beef with Stavros, but he didn't even have any good material about it. He even brought up balding, which, you know. Yeah, look at this guy who doesn't have a lot of hair on his head. OK, OK. OK, Chairman Mao. Boom, we're roasted. You got him good.

All right, I want to bring up. It is always great, like when somebody who's fat calls me fat or somebody who's like bald calls me balding and I'm like, yeah, OK. I get it. It's it's the sands of time, brother. And it's in its in its eroding all of us. It happens. I know. I know that we're not going as quickly as I wanted to, but I have to play for you, Joe Madarice.

Oh, I love Joe, right? I love Joey Madarice. He's great. He's, I'll enjoy this way more than Tom Wires. Joe has a certain endearing quality to him. Yeah, he can't get it right. It's not funniness, but it's something. Joe can't get it right, and he knows it, but he will never it right. It's not funniness, but it's Joe can't get it right and he knows it

But he will never stop trying. No bizarre like Tom, but he also never changes So and I think I've talked to Mike about this where it's like Joe Matarice goes. Hey look it You know, I'm not good at this podcasting thing. So here's a new podcast. I do. It's the same thing. I was doing before You're like, what's the fuck? Why? You just said you know that's not good. Why are you doing this? I think the difference between Joe and Tom Myers is that Tom Myers thinks he is fucking brilliant. Correct.

Like Tom Myers is a guy that watches Bill Maher on HBO and goes, that should be me. I'm better than him. Absolutely. You know what I mean? Whereas at least Joe knows he fucking sucks, which makes him a little more endearing. Yes.

Tom Myers has literally commented on our videos, calling me podcast Karen and trying to link to the actual episode and saying, see what the show really is without it being taken out of context. I'm like, Tom, I played the entire setup and punchline of your jokes. It's not how are you a Karen? Are you like trying to get his podcast taken down? No, I'm just making fun of him. Yeah, I'm just spotlighting it.

Probably getting a lot more downloads. It's all I can imagine I'm doing. So I want to point this out. Joe Maderese, people have been saying we should talk about the fixing Joe meltdown episode with Artie and Jim Norton. And we will do that. That's a classic. Yeah, I think I'm going to do as a bonus next week.

Cool. Or this week coming up. We'll do it where they came on his show and made it funny. And he started getting angry and insecure about it because he had all his notes. And it's like, bro, you got already in Jim here. They're killing. You know, it's even, you know, as a show host, it's even less work for me. You be funny on my show that I'm monetizing works. It's like when we would have Alex Jones on we're like just let him cook for an hour

I'm just gonna kick my feet up and just let Alex talk right so in Anthony Kumi was the other one So it's Jim. That's right I'm laying Anthony Kumiya and Joe Maderese and it was supposed to be this episode where he's like guys give me advice What should I be doing differently? There's like you fucking sock you're an idiot He's like how are you how's your know, it's like, this is a constructive. He's like, how's your marriage going? It's like, yeah, nice shoes, stupid. Like, you're just trying to do a funny show. So, yeah, so we're gonna go through that video

coming up very shortly. Sign up for our Patreon. Patreon.com slash who are these podcasts or become a member on YouTube. You'll get access to that. Okay. That'll be a banger. Joe will need a bumper for Joe soon, right?

We do. I definitely need a sounder for this. Joe Bannerese. You're gonna need a bumper for Joe soon, right? We do, I definitely need a sounder for this one. I got this. Here comes the grease ball. Perfect, okay, so Joe Bannerese did a show recently where he just went live. He had nothing to do, nothing to talk about, he's just testing out his software and stuff

and went on for 32 minutes. And that's what it looks like. How are you, everybody? Shut this lovely Joe Matter, show music off as we shut this off. You can just do it. How are you today, everybody? Welcome. Welcome to a spontaneous. You don't say what you're doing.

Well, let me just to pause this video real quick and let me pop this down Let me bring this mic off I kind of take with producer Chris That exaggerated way of talking is not natural and so opi like it is can't get away from the old one opi parallels I've been picking up now the knit hat and there's actually one I'm glad you said opi because reminded me, there's something he does specifically that is exactly how OPI thinks. I'm welcome to a spontaneous.

Those are the most medicated eyes I've ever seen. Yeah, well, yeah, I found out about that this week too. He is definitely on medication. Spontaneous live, as I got to get in the car in probably about an hour and a half. So basically what he's talking about is he has a show at governors later this night. And he's live broadcasting for 12 people and going, if you're in the long island area, come down to governors tonight.

I got another show tomorrow night. Dude, this is not a good for you. Better off putting flyers underneath that. Which is what it is. All right. So now he's doing a Jim Florentine impression and having fun with his sound board. Great, it's a fucking great impression.

It deserves a sound effect as I'm enjoying my sound effects. Yeah, it's fucking beautiful. The other day I rented a porn and I returned it fucking 30 minutes later I'm like I'm done I'm fucking done How are you guys tonight you seem like a fucking great crowd Alright alright, that's enough. I'm not fucking Matt reef. I'm fucking no. I'm not doing crowd work

It's Matt Reif Matt Reif not no Matt reef And are we doing is the premise that we're renting VHS porno tapes in 2024 and returning them if I'm Jim forate I'm like season to zest this you can Ever mentioned You're on the Chad zoom necklace now. Don't call me. He fits like that. Yeah.

All right. So now he's reading comments. This is a bad format for him. And again, similar to OPI where OPI goes on and just pulls up random comments that are happening in his live stream and half of them are ripping on them. It's like, what? This is a bad format.

Stop. Stop doing that. Yeah. And it like literally OP of them are ripping on them. It's like, this is a bad format. Stop. Stop doing that. Yeah. And like literally, OP streams are all yeah, man, how about those jets? Yeah, they had a good season. And then the next one's like Anthony and Jim fucking own your ass. And it'll be like, you know, man, I'm over it. I'm over it.

What if like, I don't want to do it anymore? He sounds like March Simpson after a while. All right. So this is also a bad format for Joe because there's no one there watching him. So they're saying like, I'll just read the comments as they come up with. That's a bad format for anybody. Nobody's listening.

What a format. Declined host says LOL. Huffy. What do we got here? Fucking Huffy Deely says yes. Yes. And one of the greatest Florentine sayings of all time is why would you do that? Why? Why would you do that? It? Why would you do that? It's fucking, there's no reason to fucking do that.

Great, it's all about your show. Why would you let a cop cop you? Now wrap it up. Ed Gannagher, fucking brutal. He's fucking brutal. He's going for the fucking jugular. I love it. See, you should be saying funny shit like,

ah, I got cocked, I got cocked by a cop. Right. My wife left me for a guy who makes $50,000 a year. Like, that would have been funny. No, just brutal. It's my warranty. 40 to 5. So he says there's 14 people watching, and he's out here promoting his gig,

and then people stop watching him, and he figures out why right here here and this is so opi. All right, we're up, we're down to 10. Well, down to nine, it's fucking dropping fast. We need a new fucking voice. Give me a new voice. That's the problem. Give me a new voice.

Somebody who's listening live. It's not the voice shithead. It's not entertaining in any single way. Yeah, I have an idea for a voice. How about the ghost of Joe Matterese? No voice on the channel out of Jim Florentine into somebody else. That's so embarrassing. I got 10.

Now we got nine. All right. Well, hey guys, tell me what to do. So I'm funnier. And I like that he thinks that there's like a word of mouth going around. Like if he just starts getting funnier, all of a sudden people are starting to start piling in. Oh, he's funny again. He's funny. Yeah. No, no, no, he's doing it already laying now. Yeah, you gotta get it. You gotta get

it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it.

You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. You gotta get it. What would you do? I'll ask both of you guys. If you're doing a live stream and there's nine people watching you, what do you think you would do? I'll answer for you. You'd ask for super chats, of course. You'd expect those nine people to start giving you money. Huff Deely says, get it.

How come nobody's fucking doing super chats? Fucking throw me a couple fucking dollars. I'm doing governors on a Friday. I need gas money. I gotta leave and rush out. It's fuckin' brutal. How much money could I be makin'? Help me out.

Help me out. Steiner loves it. This is a good podcast, he says. This is a good podcast. It's fuckin' brutal. It's not what he said. No, it's not what he said. And I love that he's like,

guys, can you start super chatting me please? I would work on a threshold of like 100 people people maybe before you start thinking that's gonna happen Yeah, like if I do if I just do nightwave alone on rumble, right? I'll average between 800 sometimes on a good show of a thousand people watching out of those people Maybe 25 people will donate. Yeah at some point. It's not a very high percentage, but so you're looking at maybe one super chat. Maybe, maybe if he's lucky or someone takes pity on him. And also, why are they going to super chat when you're putting every comment on the screen? Well, that's the other problem, too.

It's like, what do I get for super chatting? You're you have nothing else going on. So that you're. Rik Rikata won't even read a super chat less than fucking. If it's like $10 or less, he won't even read. Right. Yeah, it's very different. But this is the problem though is that guys like Joe Meta-Rees are all of a sudden getting brought on Miserable's company.

Right, they're watching that. They're watching Kevin Brennan just read Super Chat for Super Chat. They're just like, guys, now I'm live streaming. Why don't you Super Chat me? It's like, well, that's not how this works. Sorry. It works for Kevin. It doesn't work for you. It doesn't work for you.

It doesn't work for me. You have to take your shirt off and threaten the fist fight Chad and then like, they'll come over to your stream later. That's how this works. You see, you understand you're all buffoons and it's a bigger of a buffoon you are. The more we'll watch you. The Joe, the reason people watch like Patrick Melton and Chad Zumac and

like, and, and, and Ray DeVito is because they're, they're spiraling. It's fun to watch. You know what I mean? Right. So I mean Joe is too, which is why I'm watching him. And I think he's going to build an audience similar. But it's a sad spiral. Like he's he's on medication and he's like trying to be misdopositive all the time. And it's like, no, we want you to spiral. Talk about how you talk about a fight you

had with your wife recently. Yeah dude something interesting. Alright so then he starts playing sound bites and he starts quizzing the audience. Everything he's doing is the exact opposite of what he should be doing. Talking to the five people watching you is the worst thing you can do but he plays a sound bite from a movie and then asks, what is this from? He just, oh, God, it's terrible. I don't know what he's doing. Touchmen, I'll sue. What movies that from? I'll play it again.

We'll do Jim Florentine movie trivia. What movies is from? Yeah, the winner gets tickets to governors. My show tonight. You got. The winner can drive me. He can pick them up at will call. That'd be non-Italian or it doesn't count because every Italian knows that one.

Do you know about his Italian thing that he's doing now? Oh, he's always been doing that. Yeah, but now he's got this comedy tour called the 93.7% Italian comedy tour and it's all jokes. Well, you know what that's born from, right? Have you ever heard, when he had a rant years ago, everybody tried to fuck with him and like fake cancel him over. He went off one night and I don't even think he knew the direction he was going in, but he was just talking about how hard to get gigs and how certain people have a lot

of influence in comedy and he was like, we should get together like a bunch of Italian comics and start like our own thing, like we're Italian. And I'm like, you mean like a comedy ethno state? Like that's basically what he didn't realize what he was saying, but it was like, it's too many Jews in comedy. We gotta get the Italians back. See, I am under the impression,

and you might know more about the backstory here, is that he just saw Sebastian Making all this money with his old the top Italian thing. He's just like I could do that too. I could be an arena I could do that similar to how he wants to be Kevin Brennan on the podcast He wants to be Sebastian Mascalco when he does his comedy. He's just doing bad impressions of all this stuff Yep. Well Sebastian Mascalco really when you slow him down he's just a funny Joe Matarice. Well, Mike, he knows how to write jokes and they're interesting and funny, right? But it's the same cadence and everything pretty much.

Do you need it again? What is this? Touch me an Al-Souf. Touch me an Al-Souf. What movie? It's Rocky V. There's not enough people in your chat. That's the problem. What movie is that from? Touch me an Al-Souf. I'll sue what movie it's rocky five there's not enough people in your chat

There's more Rockies than there are people Huff Daly says if you build it super chats will come But that's the plan live as Then as I can but this new software software, it's fucking great. Fucking E-CAN live. It's fucking great. $32 a month if you buy the year. Who the fuck knows if they're going to be doing this podcast for a fucking year? Rocky III, Huff Dealey says, so close but not right,

that is not correct Huff. It was actually first blood. So someone does get it right here. And then as a reward, he switches the impression that he's doing. Oh thank God. Touch me in Al Su. Touch me in Al Su.

What movie? Ron Pollackwin. Ron Pollackwin on the brutal. I just started doing Harry Callas for no reason. I saw Ron Pollackwin's name and all of a sudden my voice started to do, I have to play third baseman, Ron Pollackwin for the Philadelphia Phillies. be a fellow he's swinging a lacing ball down the third baseline in coming to score is Dicky Thine and Ron Pollack when you are the man you suck. I'm sure the impression is spot on but he's talking about maybe a double down the third baseline and then he came in to score it doesn't even make sense? How many air?

How many feeling errors were there in this? This show has the energy of a guy who is locked in solitary confinement and they forgot about him for years. They're like, oh, man, Reese is still in there. Oh, shit. Go get him. Oops. So he's so bad at this.

He starts doing this baseball announcer and the people are just dropping off. No one's watching See who else we got out there in the world of law. We're down to two people watching Nobody like Harry Callis And you know he's got a tab open with his own show to my He's one of them So there's one dude. Sir, sir, sir. Don't go. This is when YouTube should shut your stream off just out of mercy.

Yes. Yes. This is fucking brutal. Since Ron Pollack was listening, Ron, if you're out there, maybe you throw a super chat in and then it starts like a sensation. Everybody starts super chatting. Everybody who? Two people.

I love this. They're just like, hey, why don't you super chat me and then other people think I'm cool. Now it's your turn. Now you go again. This reminds me and I don't know if you know about this, but Chad Zuma got busted. About a year ago. I'd say He was on his show in his live stream things are going slowly doesn't know what to talk about Oh, so he looks down at his phone for a while and then he pops his head back up and a super chat comes up The super chat says hey come on guys, let's start super chatting

He tried to grease the pop He might be as dumb as stuttering John sometimes he really is it was very funny Did you hear the story of Chad when he started emailing people who were canceling? Patreons Yes, and like sending them like passive aggressive messages like well, I mean I guess if you want to support anymore Yes, people have read those out on the show because I've seen those emails that go out. And it's also there's this weird desperation

where it's just like, you know, if you want to sign up at the dollar level, you can do that too. It's just like, oh, is this even worth your time to email someone? Dude. I mean, like, listen, we have like almost 2,000, I think, people just on locals now yeah that are that are subs and like yeah chat they drop off sometimes like people have financial situations change the debit card gets stolen they gotta order a new one whatever like you don't passively aggressively

message everyone the next day over five dollars yeah chat could be shooting himself in the foot by stealing cards Oh my god, so That was the other thing that Chad used to do He actually did it recently again where he talks about his patreon and he goes do you guys see how much Tim Dylan is making? Why can't you give me some of that money? He's literally saying like I want some of that Tim Dylan buddy We're selling internet money A match of comparing yourself to like that level of somebody Tim Dillon, buddy. We're selling internet, buddy. I want some of that. Come on, buddy. Money. Imagine comparing yourself to, like, that level of somebody. Yeah, he needs to think like...

That would be like me and Royce being like, what's up? You can't give us Theo Vaughn money? Right, yeah, that's the problem here. Hey, Spotify, how can we not return to my phone call? What the fuck? We're just as good as Theo Vaughn. Oh, my God. You guys are giving money to Tim Dillon and not to me. Yes

That's exactly what we're doing. All right one more impression here before we somebody should have responded with wait Tim Dillon has a patron Gotta go all right one more amazing impression here before we get off this podcast. I can brutal Impression here before we get off this podcast brutal You guys are doing a whole fucking thing like Rocky How you guys doing all right, I'm doing I'm doing job not reasons act as Rocky So I got this psychologist wife. I got like brain injuries and I got a doctor wife, you know, like opposite contract. You know what I mean? I believe that that is Joe Matariz's act that he's doing.

Instead can you do the monologue from the end of first blood as Joe Matariz? I'd rather hear that. That would be better. I'll do it next week. Yeah, we'll get AI to do that for us. So... Nothing's ever over. We've...

We've... We've... Obviously played his stand-up before where we're convinced he's sweetening it. Yeah. And here he is on his show playing that same laughter and applause That we hear on his stand-up things. I think that confirms it, right? Yeah Yeah, man, I mean I couldn't be more obviously I got like a relaxed brain and she's got a phd in Neuro psychology, I mean, I don't know what you

It's not funny no one knows what she sees in you Yeah But I found this video recently that he does a he puts up these like stand-up bits that he has is he still doing the The Kyle canane thing with the fucking the face mask thing on it's he was loving that for a while I didn't I haven't seen that no Oh, he was doing a lot of those face masks like filter videos where you're like still on on his face And then like he's doing the Dream but like you know that tech isn't perfected yet So like the face every once in a while pops off and pops back on so you'll just see show batteries again

But the face will go onto his lamp behind him. That's funny. Well, also the other thing too is that, because like he was saying, he was like, what voice do you want me to do so you guys stick around? It's like, no, you also need to have material. Yeah. We don't care if you just do an impression. That's not funny.

Material, you say. Yeah. Here's the thing, Joe. I do a pretty good podcast. I mean, people kind of know who I am and I do very little voices. Right. We don't do very little voices. Right, you don't have to do voices. It's amazing. All right. I want to play you this stand up bit that he put up here because there's a grift going on.

I think he tried for this. This is from last summer. I think he tried this angle and it didn't work out. He tries a lot of things. I didn't find out my dad had this anxiety thing until my 40th birthday. I planned to cruise. We start pulling away from land in Fort Lauderdale. I'll never forget it. He's looking out the porthole on the ship and he just starts going. That's gotta be sweetened, right? Something funny about someone breathing heavy who has anxiety. I wouldn't think.

Oh, you think they're, he's adding them in? I think so, because some of this doesn't even seem natural, but okay, let's see where he's going with this. I'm like, Dad, what's going on? He's like, I don't know. I think I'm having one of my anxiety attacks. I go, what are you talking about? He goes, well, I've had an anxiety problem most of my life. So he says, I go, why would you never tell me about that?

He goes, ah, thought it might have skipped a generation. This isn't Teen Wolf. It would have been really nice to have known that this anxiety thing was running through my family. Because it ended up doing a lot of damage early on in my comedy career before I started taking anti-depressants, which I didn't realize. Yeah, now you're doing great. Yeah, he looks terrible right here. So, yeah, he looks really bad.

Like that lighting is not doing him favors. No, so he cuts to this video right here after he shows his little bit about his dad had anxiety Your panic attacks. So now he goes into this and this is crazy could make all the anxiety go away It really hurt my career. I wasn't able to go on airplanes to go do gigs when I was pitching SSRIs right now Mm-hmm, which is you know, Pfizer's hot right now. Yeah, right. Well, you know, Fyre's just hot right now. Yeah, right. Yeah, he's trying to get out of that. He wants that Fyre, he wants that Travis Kelsey money. I wanted to use the word

transform, transpose into anger really easily. And then I marry a psychologist and she notices in me that I get angry way too easily and you should try going on anti-depressants. Life changing. If you're somebody out there who suffers from anxiety where you're afraid to even get on an airplane, you overthink things, you have anger come out of you from the littlest thing, you might want to go see a psychiatrist at least start doing therapy because doing therapy Was life changing? I've been in therapy for years. You're so happy. Yeah, I know it's going really well This is like when Howard Stern says yeah, I see a psychiatrist four days a week I'm like well, I'll never do that. You seem miserable

Everyone I know that goes to therapy and takes these drugs are just shells of people So the reason why I'm happy the reason why I said that this is a grift is underneath this. So this is a standup from my special Medicated Available Free on YouTube, blah, blah, blah, and then it says, to hire me to perform for the mental health comedy show for your group or organization along with speaker slash comedian

Dr. Matt Ballas contact him at so he's promoting this thing where I guess if you have a whole company of anxious people you know do a retreat where they're like yeah we're gonna go hear from an anxious comic who takes SSRIs and now it's feeling better yeah Joe come on out to the anxiety bit would you hear me out on this if you're feeling depressed and anxious why don't you hire a funny comedian like funny stuff and not talk about my fucking anxiety of my panic attacks good point so I don't think this worked out because this video has 98 views it's from June of last year there's two likes just like. Oh, come on. Word is poor guy.

So well, I really poured salt in the wound. I mean, yeah, you're going to send him into a fucked his ratio all up. So that is a misery loves company star, Joe Metteries. So he's been going on MLC because I don't really watch MLC because it's on at four o'clock and my show is on at four o'clock. But is it? I guess. Well, I have a couple of clips. I'll see because it's on at four o'clock and my show's on a four o'clock. But is it? I guess. Well, I have a couple of clips.

So he was at yesterday. Oh, no. And they're talking about me and Joe Maderie doesn't know who I am. And he's on there with Tukey and Ray DeVito, who I'm friendly with both of those people, and he's got Joe Maderie doesn't know I am. And Kevin Brennan is really trying to push this Carl's a loser thing. I think you and Kevin never patched it up. I think I would have broken Kevin Brennan because he's trying to push this Carl's a loser thing. I think I even Kevin never patched it up. I think I would have broken Kevin breaded

because he's trying to push this so hard to get everyone on his side. So they're talking about the video where my wife comes in the room and I was playing my mandolin. I set it down on the floor. I'm OK. Careful as my mandolin right there. And she asked if I had taken a nap that day and I said I didn't.

And so he's explained to Joe Maderese like like you gotta see this video, it's so embarrassing. You guys building it up, building it up. Adam can't find it. So they're just talking about it finally over an hour and he finds the video. And he's like, oh, we got the video. Joe Maderese is like, oh, I can't wait to see this video right here.

Instagram stories, Instagram boring stories. Jesus, I get it. Cause there's no mandolin involved in that story. So it stinks. If there was a mandolin involved, then that'd be noteworthy. Oh, I got the clip if you guys want to see it. Yeah, we do. I would suck it.

I would give Noren's wife's dick to see this. Yeah, that's the other thing too. So you hear Joe, Joe's going, oh yeah, yeah. We definitely got to see this because we've been building this up. Kevin Bren that's the other thing too. So you hear Joe, it goes, go, oh, yeah, yeah. We definitely got to see this because we've been building this up. Kevin Brennan on the show said he would rather make out with a dude than a woman who's older than him. And I do keep just like, well, that's gay.

What do you mean? Would you rather have a woman who's older than you than a dude? He's just and so. Well, you don't want to talk to dudes and old ladies. I want to suck a dick, Chad. So that was a weird angle that he had. No one went along with that. I had to kind of pull it off of another thing. So it's not great

quality, but there you go. Sorry. Careful of the mandolin. I was doing requests. We were playing request for a good job of digging up. I did not. That was my request. Alright, that's the full video. Joe's staring like what just happened one more time Careful the mandolin. I was doing requests Flag requests for a job in shiggy nap. I did not that was my request. What's Joe right here? Wow? I don't get it No, I don't either though. That's the best thing. That's how any body who doesn't know the party's involved

should react to that absolute non-video. I know the party's involved. It's nothing. Brennan did two hours on this. So he's speaking. So your wife came in the room, and you guys had a nice friendly brief exchange. Yes, she just got on the work.

And then you went on about with your stream. Yeah, I just got on from work and came in. But Kevin had to do two hours on this. Of course. Because he's got nothing on me, so he had to make it seem like this was a big deal. And he's guess what some of those audience into thinking this is a this crazy sick burn. But look at how hard he has to work to explain to Joe and the rest of the crew how embarrassing that is. The worst thing ever. I thought we were going to watch you shoot the three pointers.

That video made Kevin's year, Joe. That is his mom's wife asking him why disappointed that he didn't take a nap like you would treat your son and he was asking her, can you please be careful of my mandolin? Please don't step on my mandolin. Yeah, we saw the video. That's the kind of map. He's explaining why it's so embarrassing though, Marish. And he was asking her, can you please be careful of my mandolin? Please don't step on my mandolin. Yeah, we saw the video. That's the kind of map. He's explaining why it's so embarrassing though, Merz.

You're not understanding this? I'm not getting it. No, I'm sorry. It's the craziest thing ever. The courage they have. Dr. Steve said maybe the don't step on mandolin is a euphemism for that they're going to have sex or the napping was a euphemism for like let's go Betty by I mean it's so it's it's so it's it's just it should never be it should never be Adam

keep that if you don't even have anything to make it sound like, uh, you're going to take in a nap or something. It's like, uh, what are you going to bed? You're going to take a little nap. And so you're resting. What is that? Ray DeVito wants to give him something. He wants to please Kevin Brennan. Tuki wants to please him.

They're all just staring at him like, I don't know. I, what else are we supposed to say? Hey boss, you're the same thing. Honestly, Tuki kind of sandbagged him. If you go back a little bit when he goes, devastated. Worst thing ever. He said devastated.

Speed rock on, speed rock on our boys. He's saying keep that. Yeah, I'm going to just hold on to it. Keep it in. Put it on the sound board. If we have a sound board, put it on. Audio and video have their own separate fucking channels. That's brilliant. Carl's a fucking clown.

Tukey is one of his best pals. Tukey, you can tell Carl, he's a fucking clown and there's no way you can watch him and go, wow, they must have a lot of sex. They have a really, he's worried about his mandolin and she's worried about him taking a fucking nap, just like your mommy would. really, he's worried about his mandolin and she's worried about him taking a fucking nap. Just like your mommy would.

Carl, you're a clown and you don't even have a lot of sex with your mom. I'll be telling him, I'm going to tell you this Carl to your face. Everybody's covered for him. Wait, no, they have a loving and she wants him to get his rest because he works so hard doing his prep for a shitty show where he watches more stuttering John clips. What a homo. Thank you, to keep. He's totally sandbagging him there and he doesn't even realize it. You don't even have enough sex with your mom.

Well, he's based on a seven second clip that he saw and has watched a thousand times. He's like, look at this guy's sex life. Why don't I have sex with my wife every second of every day, sir? But here's the thing, right? Again, it's just a mundane clip and you're both being polite. Like it would have been a funny clip if you guys had a little spat or something where there was like a quick, almost a flash of like a fight and you're like not now or something and she's like

Oh, okay, that's juicy. That's funny, but she literally just came in from work. She's like she get an happen Now I was doing so well. What can you do? You know I think I'm trying to make sense of this too and I'm involved so it's hard for me to take an outside perspective I think that the word mandolin was mistaken as like mandalorian. And they thought I was talking about Star Wars toys or something at first. Not an instrument. Those are in his glycerin.

Different room. Right. Yeah. Star Wars toys are upstairs. The man. He said, don't touch its mandalorian. I think that's what they got a baby Yoda there. Did he nap with it? Because I went out of Ray DeVito's show and Ray was trying to buy with me. He's just like, yes, so you got a baby Yoda there. Did he nap with it? Because I went out and read a video show and Ray was trying to buy with me. He's just like, yes, so you got Star Wars toys too.

I go, no, I don't. He goes, oh, OK. Because Ray literally still has Star Wars. I thought he was going to bond with you over something. I thought he finally had an adult man to bond with Star Wars. Can you ask the mom, wife, if I can sleep over? I don't know. She's in a bad mood today.

She was stepping out mandolins all morning. The drug engineer says, you don't have sex all day, every day, gay. Yeah, for real. Merch, I've kept you much longer than I was planning on, but I have a couple clips of Suttering John totally up to you. No, it's fine. I'm here for you. All right. I love that. I appreciate it. Let's get into it. I've got no life. So when I was on Revenge of the Cis last week, we played the clip of Rocco going up to Stuttering John and asking if his son's ever queefed in his face.

That was fucking cool. One of the greatest things ever. John is so upset with Rocco, and that's the guy who's two-key on there. Same guy. Trashing my kids. Yes. So what John does on his show, he's so unprepared. He just starts scrubbing through different subreddits, and he's literally just scrolling through looking for things that are interesting, falling for obvious jokes like this one, which is hilarious. Is this really true? Now, people, someone, is that Rocco Burrow?

He got arrested in Bergen County. Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Are you joking? No. he's falling for this. This is the famous Frank Sinatra. I was going to guess it was either Sinatra or it was I was like, who was it? It was one of those rat back. 1938. It's in black and white. It's a very famous photo that was so stupid. Are you photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo.

That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo.

That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo.

That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That was photo. That got arrested in Bergen County. That looks like a young tuki. Is that true? Could somebody tell me if that's true? They don't take click shots of black and white. What do you think this is? Is that really a young Rocco Barrow? Holy shit. So another another criminal in the devil verse. Oh, God. If you saw a wanted poster in the post office,

could you believe this guy is wanted? It's right here in this post office. Holy shit. It's amazing. Yeah, it is amazing how stupid you are, John. Yeah, John, that's why they sell you can buy framed pictures of Roco's mugshot on Amazon. It's a wrestling 1930.

Your man cave. All right, so. You know, I've seen a picture of Rocko's mugshot in a pizza place. Do you think he owned that pizza place? Oh, John. No, John. It's Frank Sinatra. It's very famous.

All right. It's a place. Oh, John. No, just for a sin. I just very famous. All right. So John, like I said, he does a show where he rants and raised like a lunatic says the same shit over and over again that he says every day. And then he goes, time to go to the subreddits. And he starts scrolling through and he can't find what he's looking for. So I'm going to play this whole clip. Feel free. We'll have a discussion around it because it's a lot of dead air.

I suppose you would judge show is So I'm gonna play this whole clip, feel free. We'll have a discussion around it because it's a lot of dead air. Especially what Joe Joe is. And he's got the sound down. So all the videos are on play as he's. Oh my God, John. Mute your tab, you fucking retard until you need it. He's so stupid. Let me just do that for a second. So he did that.

There was one I really wanted to get here. Okay. So let me ask John Why do you copy paste? No shit before the show paste your notes somewhere retired Where is it? This is what he does Fuck and your first himself as the goat. Oh, this is what he does. Fuck. And your first himself as the goat.

This is what he does. Damn it. This is like this reminds me of like the occasional night waves when I go like four hours on a Friday night and I'm hammered by the end. Yes. And I'm like. But even you don't go. But. Somebody took it down. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Uh. Uh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh.

Da, da, da. Don't tell me they took it down, because that was my favorite thing. What was it? I made a note that I was going to speed this up, but it's kind of funny to watch it in real time. Oh, OK. Yeah, that wasn't Rocoburro. OK. I didn't see the date.

That's the thing. Last time I'm doing this, That's the thing, a lot of times I'm doing this. It's hard to be doing this and doing everything else. It's like, you know, you're the most famous mug shot in history besides Trump. Yeah. Shoe-y mask. I like that he goes, it's hard to do this while I'm doing, you're not doing anything, Josh.

You're not doing anything. Everybody's not doing anything. You're staring at your computer. No, that's not it. He does do more than Kevin Brennan. Kevin Brennan, I will give him that. Yes, that's true.. He does do more than Kevin Brennan. I will give him that. Yes, that's true.

Although even Brennan's now playing Clipster and John on his show. But he's not. He's going, add up. Pull up that clip. Did you find it yet? It's so embarrassing. Get that clip of Carl playing with its baby Yoda.

Look at his wife. I think she's older than him. Oh yeah. That's embarrassing. No, I don't know. I bet he doesn't even ride a bicycle. What color is his helmet? Oh, there it is.

Oh, boy. I love this one. This is by the way, it's his cell phone going on this whole fucking time. He's trying to find out. It's one of them. Mercer just amusing ourselves. I think this is what his audience does. He's still going. He's still going.

This is probably good scene. Okay, this is great. So he finally fucking found the clip that he wanted to do. That was two and a half minutes of him looking for that. So now the thing that everyone's calling out shooly for, and by everyone, I mean Kevin Brennan and Stettering John, is that he homeschools his children. When I say he homeschools his children, it doesn't mean that he's teaching them. Just means that his children are homeschooled.

I have a friend who homeschools their kids. They get a group of kids together, and then they have different instructors that come in and help with different things. I don't know how shooly does it. I have no idea but According to that dude It's my it's honestly fire kids. I probably be keeping them out of fucking public schools I think I would too because the propaganda that's going out of public schools right now is insane not just the propaganda but like

See any more videos of these kids just getting Stalked into fucking goo and you're like yo like when I was a kid We beat the shit out of each other every now and again, but we're stomping with both feet on people's heads and shit Yeah, it's it's it's brutal So she only decides to homeschool the kids and this is a big gotcha and of course John always has funny quips When he finds things out about people they think they're embarrassing. Oh, so you're doing the you're doing the homeschool stuff too. Yeah, we were doing the homeschool before. He couldn't even pass high school and he's homeschooling.

Are you fucking with me? How are you gonna have a trans son if you don't So one of his favorite go-to's now is are you fucking with me? That's one of the jokes. Let's see what else he's got on this one Your homeschooling Who's gonna homeschool you? Holy shit, that's his other one Pandemic hit

Doesn't want his kids to get Molested and beat up You fucking with me holy hell All right, you're not even gonna have you fucking with me? Holy hell. All right. You're not even going to have a daughter with zippitits. So John has been doing this thing. He bought a new computer and his MacBook Pro has these things built in. So when he makes certain gestures, balloons come up or fireworks go and stuff like that.

And so because John is a child, he thinks this is entertaining and fun. And it's not except for when it fails. Because he tries real hard to get this going. John, is it true that the German Navy used your apartment to sink the Luzia? Why is he laughing at that? The Luzitania. It was a thing. What does that even mean? The German Navy used your apartment to sink the Lusitania.

It was a U-boat. What is the joke there? I didn't get it. He's laughing. Yeah, it wasn't the Lusitania German boat. The Lusitania was going from New York to London. Oh, okay. It was all right.

Or not London, but England. And it was a U-boat that took it down. And one of the reasons why we got into World War I, but- Does he have flooding in his apartment? Did he have to Did a pipe burst I don't get the joke. I don't think he does either because he's just someone gives him two bucks. He goes ha ha ha It's the the old Tom user apartment to sink the Lucia

I don't think so, but I'll give you this what is Napoleon after the witness? I don't think so, but I'll give you this. What is Napoleon after the with this? Ha ha ha ha ha ha. All right, so now, John's excited about the tube box, so he's gonna give us a show here. Yeah, baby! Oh, come on, man. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Hey! Yeah! Ha ha ha ha ha. Get any love, yeah! Ha ha ha ha ha. This is the best. Yeah! Ha ha like, I don't give any love, yeah! This is the best. Yeah! He's just gonna get angry and go,

fuck this over here! This is the hardest he's ever made me laugh! It's amazing, when he fails at shit, it really is impressive. It almost looks like he's trying to cast the magic spell, and he lost his powers I have another clip of him looking for a clip that goes out for minutes, but whenever we get the point He's really John rules

He's ever bad. He's so bad. That's the hardest thing's ever made me laugh. Yeah! He's the best. Incredible. All right, guys. Well, look, thank you all for the super chats. You know, I went, I had to start late today because of of I was at the doctor other doctor I want to tell you about that so look at his handshaking turns out because I asked him why Like suddenly now like when I'm doing laundry I start

running out of breath So they didn't he KG and apparently out of shape alcoholic Smelling your dirty laundry. He has the doctor. why do I get out of breath doing laundry okay let's find out what's going on here they think that something happened with my heart now granted I had a panic attack in Long Island and the ambulance took me to the hospital. What's the balloons come out? They checked me. They said there are three wires, nerves or whatever that supply energy to your heart and one

of mine is completely clogged. Oh shit. So the doctor today said it very well could be that. But I was hiking like last year I was hiking. It's walking. Yes. Hitchhiking. Yeah.

So I think just. That's kind of an awkward, kind of awkward now. But it feels kind of weird when you were doing a victory lap about Kumi as a high tech. Well, right. That's the first thing I thought of. That's what I was thinking too. Karma.

He was being a little ghoulish when it came to Anthony. That's like when people come to me and it's somebody I hate. And they're like, did you hear he's in the hospital? I'm like, yeah, well, that's not. I'm not happy about that. Like, yeah, let me know when he does something stupid. I'll make sure of it. No, when I stay away from that bad juju stuff.

Right. I got reports back from AC that Chad Zumak looks like he doesn't have long to live. He can't keep his hands steady, he's drinking and he's on a bender all weekend. And I'm like, well, I hope he gets hope. I don't want to see someone drink themselves to death. And no, I want you to like when Crowder went to the hospital and everybody's like, ah, yeah, fuck him. And I'm like, no, I want him to live a long time so I can keep calling him a

homosexual on the internet. I don't want him to die. Yeah. Um, so yeah, that's unfortunate. I guess John has some health issues with his heart. So we'll be watching that. Hopefully he gets whatever he needs. This came in and this is, I think from Daniel sent this into me. It shows that John's height is actually five five Because what they've done here this the internet is fucking

This is incredible So they show that the base of the microphone stand the standard size is nine Inches and 13 16th of an inch. So with that scale They could then figure out all the other heights on here. So he's five, four and seven eighths of an inch. I like that they even accounted like it goes through the feet because the angle is different.

Like they really did this with detail. Yes, they found the exact spot on the floor. This is insane. These people, dude, the internet is fucking insane. It's great because John, when he was in Atlantic City, people saw him for the first time in a long time. He's very short. And they went, oh, you've shrunk. And then it was crazy.

He went to the doctor when he got back to LA and went, and they measured my height and I'm five, seven and a half losers. Take that. Five, seven and a half. You're bragging. Yes. You're five seven. That's a brag for for a job. Then he went to the doctor and he's like I don't understand that I pissed off the voodoo guy from from from Beetlejuice. Somebody's trying to shrink me. I think Patrick

Melton put the shrink in powder and my drink in my cause. I want to bring on our review girl. Mary Beth Rosie joining us on the show. What's happening? How you doing good Mary Beth is gonna be joining us in Vegas along with Brian Johnson. They're both coming out for hackmania That's exciting. So we have a quick game to play a card of put together another episode of to catch an alien and So we have a quick game to play. Cardiff put together another episode of To Catch an Alien, and this is gonna be pretty self-explanatory, Mersh. There's this guy named Tommy for MSCS media, although I think he's rebranding the Tommy T show.

Cardiff sent me that. But, which is weird, because I think his last name is Knightly or something like that. I think it's Tommy K, but whatever. It's time for everyone's favorite game show to catch an alien. Are you ready to play? To catch an alien. Do you think nowadays, you know, with all this social media and kids, adults, they seem to never be happy? I mean, I get Botox right, but I just want to be an old Plastic surgery on his hair This is the California Raisin podcast.

They seem to never be happy. I mean, I go get Botox, right? But I just want to be an old guy that looks good with a cigar one day on a chair, you know? I can see that. Yeah, I want to have like a full head of hair, not too wrinkly, good tan, and smoke a cigar in my lawn chair. But you know, like these kids now, they see all this stuff on social media and I think it's called like a

dysphoria type of thing and nothing against them But they look in and not day the individual Looks in the mirror and they see not what everyone else sees like their lips are huge, right? Or they're at the right spot and they don't need any they look beautiful Totally, but in their head they're ugly and they need more I just want to point out mercy if you haven't seen Tommy before, I just learned recently that English is his first language. I was shocked.

I was shocked to learn that. I thought for sure there was his third or fourth, but. And then next thing you know, they're out to here and out to here and out to here, and they think they look great, right? Because they're maxed out. He looks like the bastard child of like if Patrick bet David had sex with a gray alien. Yes, okay I was convinced that he was an alien a space alien. You have made me very But I recently met a guy who knows him and he says no he grew up in Philadelphia

I was like, I don't know how that's possible But okay Right because they get their maxed out How do you deal with that and is that do you think that's a cause of social media or it was there and that was What did Tommy say next here are your choices? number one rubbing salt in the wound. B, closing the door after the horses have left the barn. Next, tip of the iceberg. Four, just scratching the surface. Tommy laughs and says, literally.

And lastly, the cherry on top. To catch tough an alien. Okay. So it says, do you think that's a cause of social media or was it there? And that was was I always go first I'm gonna say the be closed in the door the barn door after the horses left what do you think merch I believe I'm gonna go with be got be as well Mary Beth I think I'm gonna go with scratching the surface literally, although I mean, it really could be any of them in this one.

All right, you're going with the four. Yeah. Producer Chris went with B. Yeah, B as well. All right. So this Cardiff do this on purpose with one B next. Yes. It's okay. Because I'm like, it was fucking with me when I'm like, what is he doing? Gotcha. He was it was fucking with me, but I'm like How do you deal with that and is that do you think that's a cause of social media or it was there and that was just a cherry on top

My god, that doesn't even make sense Zero none of us even thought that was possible. We get the one that would have made sense the cherry on top. Even she looks confused. Is that like the cherry on top of the mental illness Sunday? Yeah. Give us a program, Carl. Suicide Sunday.

Even she just looks confused. Like what? Have suffered from dysmorphia for a long time, especially with the media. And before it was Instagram, it was magazines. And then it was commercials and movies. And it's just all across the board, just how we are geared. I do think that Instagram really brings more of it to life

because it's at our fingertips and it's just constant. Keeping it on. Why does she dress like those shitty strawberry candies that your grandparents used to have at the house? Yeah, I feel like if you unwrapped her and make a lot of noise. Yeah, everybody in church would turn and look at her. Yeah, you would want to be in a movie theater. Everybody in church would turn and look at her.

It's just so much and you can see like literally like what everyone is doing and... That's all for this time come back next time to find out if you have the botox induced dysphoria enough to catch an alien subreddit surfing live saturday the 9th comedy at the Carlson in Rochester, New York Get your tickets now at Carlson comedy comm Sit Eugene sit good dog Thank you card And we definitely appreciate that. Guys, we pro corn dip around here.

Yeah, I haven't seen corn dip in a while, but I liked him with Opie. Oh, yeah, I like corn. I couldn't believe any back to back Opie and Chad, like making them likeable. Yes. Yes. And that was the weird thing is that as soon as Cardiff and corn dip and Tuki and whatever other character that guy plays started going on OPI show and Chad and even almost stuttering

John you're like, Hey, this is actually an entertaining show now. This is kind of fun. It's like, you know, cartoon characters all getting together. You like when Hannah Barbera would have like the cross thing and they're all like wacky racing or whatever. Yeah. No plot. Just music.

There's a hang. There's all these characters you love together. Yeah. It's like Sesame Street without the learning. Yeah. Some Who. Just. It was a hang. It was a long trip. Did you love together? Yeah. It's like Sesame Street without the learning. Yeah. Some Who Framed Roger Rabbit type shit. Right. Yes. All right, guys. I want to thank you, Merch, so much for coming on. Thank you. This has been fantastic.

I had a blast. WATP live. You guys need to come to this show. It's going to be lit. We're going to fight each other. We're going to get banned from venues. Fuck yeah. I'm going to go after K after cola i'm throwing drink after drink after drink should be a lot of fun um people should check out revenge of the siss i had a blast with you guys on the show uh last week you guys do a fantastic program on this your friday at four on rumble right

you have four to six every week a day and then you also do night waves. Oh cute puppy. Thanks. Yeah and a night wave radio also just on rumble because they don't oh and a plug since we are on the YouTube side of things. Yes. The Bad Luck Boys on YouTube it's my cat channel where I did try to help cats. No shit. It's like not a joke like I know some people think it's like a fucking bit I swear to God like it's a little side project where you like TNR and trapped a pregnant cat last year and got her into a rescue. So we do some cat stuff. You're the Beth Stern of the dabbleverse is what you're telling me.

I'm the attractive one. That's right. That's awesome. Well, definitely check out Revenge of the Cis over on Rumble and check out Nightwave. But most importantly, come see us live in Largo, Florida, March 22, WTPLive.com. Merge, great talking to you, buddy. Always a good time. Thanks for coming on.

Thank you for having me. Yes, for sure. And then Mary Beth will be reading some reviews. But first, everyone's favorite part of the show. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea.

The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea.

The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. The tea. Okay. Do you want us to get away from that, at least for some time and get back to just doing our regular format?

Or do you enjoy the Andy and Lucy and me competition? So go on our Patreon page, I'll have a poll up there, you can let us know what we should be doing. And then based on that, we'll choose what we're gonna be doing for the Wednesday show. Cause when you all talk, I listen. And I don't wanna run that bit into the ground.

I enjoy it, but honestly, the reason why I started doing it in the first place was so I wouldn't have to do so much work on was this. Yeah, why don't I let these people bring some clips so that I don't have to do all of the work. What happened? Well, I don't do it too much anyway. The show's gone for fucking eight hours to three hours. It really is ridiculous. So anyway, that's the teaser. I don't know what we're doing yet. But we'll definitely put that out

Mary Beth hang out after the news. We'll do some reviews. We'll listen to some Voice mails. They're gonna say Jews. No Take it away Lucy type box From Facebook judge hard groove posts a current picture of our hero Stutcho in the line at the deli and quotes, I go to the gym every day. Rob Hock cuts up with the classic, 12 ounce curls, Ryan Malady comments, I find his lack of chin disturbing.

Hanu Moray's notes, he's so tiny. Tom Jornow riffs, it's no wonder he's confident enough to try to hit on 24-year-old women. From YouTube, let's hope Trigavelli is correct when he writes, Matarice is the new stut Joe because Joey Mattress doesn't let anything slide. He'll respond to all of this. Naz Redna offers, he needs a lot more than a producer. Chris Sadowski makes a strong point. If everybody has OCD, nobody has OCD.

This self-diagnosis is really getting old. From Reddit, Dr. Ted Pinas Astronaut reports, Matarice is awful. Might need to be a regular check-in podcast, Carl. John stinks. Kevin is an abysmal human. I'm sick of this WWE shit. Do you know how to drum up buzz about your podcast? You start by having a good fucking podcast. Kevin. John. Kinda looking your way too, Cardiff, enough with the fake drama. Hack the Movies represents the Italian people wish

to apologize for Joe Matariz. Soul Server says, Matariz is kind of amazing. Most talentless middle-aged comics would have given up after the first documentary. Speaking of the porcelain docs, when does Zumac get one? Delaware is a lie, Joe Matarice is the worst. The guy is every obnoxious New Jersey dago that has no personality outside of being Italian. I hope he chokes on linguine. Count Kumya points out, Joe Matarice

talks about being Italian only slightly more than Shule does about being Jewish. Fix it 403, Tukey had to breathe John's stink long enough to make a 40-second video in AC and he barely survived. Nothing gets passed your wife's BF, wife's BF. Putting a television sample in the intro is not lost on me. Fuck you, Carl. PicoNicky confesses, I don't like voting for a woman, but Lucy's podcast was next level bad. PX7 blah blah blah. Goddamn, Carl is a hardcore brony. Fucking sick!

Joggerlicious ads. I wouldn't be surprised if Carl is a furry. Ender Perk with his two cents. We need an update on Mushmouth Rich Voss as well. From Patreon, bigtime superchats shares. Bravo Carl and PC! It's fantastic having Patrick diving in at just the right time. John is obsessed with shit, assholes himself, shitty assholes, and John. Nobody wants to know

about your five inch wart penis. Daniel Brzezinski, and then he gets into a fake fight with Stevie Lou. What has become of the dabbleverse? Out for smoke soap pines? It's really a bad look when people in real life make the characters of always sunny, seem reasonable, and likable. Total Anon, Caleb Hammer from Financial Audit is fantastic. Please do an episode just going through the delusional assholes that come on and say the dumbest shit. Lynn Gush's, Love Eric, The Better Z Man, and Economic Hitman sounds pretty tough when

he plays us out with, Yeezy's dog is twitching his legs while he sleeps on the couch behind Eric. It's so cute. All right. Fantastic net news segment, as always, producer Chris and Lynch Typebox. Thank you for pointing that together. And Mary Beth, you look fantastic today. Thank you. I just got my hair done. You look great. People should check you out on Only

Fans and Mary Beth Rosie. M-A-R-I-B-E-T-H-R-O-S-I-E. You sound like Sir John Spong, my last name. Get it down. That's good. Do you have any new reviews to read for us today? Yes, I got one here. Beautiful. It's titled, This Is Bad. Okay. They totally missed the point with the Music Commentary podcast. YFBS was an awful critique of the show and totally missed the point and have no idea of the background and education of the creators of that hilarious show.

I'm going to guess that's a one star review from a fan. One star. idea of the background and education of the creators of that hilarious show. I'm going to guess that's a one star review from a fan. One star. Yeah, either one of the hosts or a fan of your favorite band sucks. I'm going to go with one of the hosts. Yeah, probably. They don't even know our background. I studied music. Yeah. I know music better than they do.

And I played the recorder. I mean, the only thing I would argue with that in that critique is that your favorite band was not hilarious. The guys were just angry at Will Cole. Yeah, an old genre of music, but any who let's hear what our voice mailers have to say about the show. Oh, Carl, I got a real axe to grind with everyone in the devil verse that's shitting on the singer of the outfield cover band. Everyone's given them a hard time. That little 12 year old boy went up there and sang his fucking heart out and

you're all given him a hard time. Fuck all of you. I see what you did there, Sarah. So we're talking about the, uh, the famous fight between Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy. There's that outfield song being sung by the cover band at the Borgata and it's just playing on repeat as all these videos keep Surfacing is hearing over and over and over again The woman didn't have the greatest voice in the world What do you have there?

You know, I usually wait until I'm home to all those background noise for my job, but Jesus Christ Carl this fucking Joe Mattariz episode is fucking painful. Don't ever do this to me again. I'm fucking going home right now. I don't even want to be here anymore. This sucks. Fuck you.

Sorry about that, sir. I don't know what to tell you. By the way, Dang Lizard says, can you get Merced to do another audiobook version of Julia Fox's book? So Blind Mike and I have been doing these cross shows on each of our patrons. We're going through Julia Fox's book. I finally watched Uncut Gems last night. I watched the movie that made Julia Fox famous.

And wow, was she a bad actor? Wow. Have you ever seen that movie, Mary Beth? No, I haven't. Are you fucking kidding me? Are you fucking with me? There's a scene in there where she's supposed to be hysterically upset, and then there's no tears or anything, and she's,

oh, blah, blah, then she's like smiling. She's going, ah, right now. I never want to see that again. Cut. All right. Good afternoon, Mr. Hamburger. This is the customer service department from Rochester custom dildos. There's a bit of a problem with your recent order. You ordered our manzingo XXL line with a requested circumference of 16 inches, but our manufacturer can only go up to 12 inches around also under additional specifications, it seems to you simply wrote, more veins. Give us a call back at your earliest convenience.

We can sort these issues out and have your custom dildo on its way to you in no time. Have a nice day. That wasn't for the show. Producer Chris, what the fuck? Did you get that mixed up with my personal stuff? I wanted to surprise you. Jesus. Hilarious. Thank you. Show producer Chris, what the fuck? Did you get that mixed up with my personal stuff? I wanted to surprise you. Jesus.

Hilarious. Thank you. That's not cool. That's not cool at all. I don't know if you realize it, that's very embarrassing. Well, get back to them about the veins thing, would you? All right. Well, the embarrassing thing is that it only goes up to 12 inches.

I know. What's up with that? With that, it's circumference, though. You have to understand, Marybeth. Oh, yeah. I understand. Oh, with that with that circumference now. You have to understand Mary Batz. Oh yeah. I understand. She's a girl. I get it. I. You know, I've been I was listening to the show this week

with the My Little Pony and then director Johnny fucking Andy Q. Public brought some basic bitch. L.A. Dove shit. You know, honestly, I'd rather watch my little pony than LA Very popular space reality show. I haven't finished this portion yet. I was thinking I was really thinking about skipping over it But good job. Good job Carl. Good job. I always like listening to Good job, Carl. Good job. I always like listening to God bless the retards that watch children's cartoons.

How else am I supposed to be entertained? I don't want to watch either. I want to watch the people react into that shit and laugh at them. But God bless you, Carl. And Trucker Andy, I'll see you on our date. Yeah hot hot piece of ass I Think those were good points. I got lost for a minute. Yeah A lot going on

One of the things that I we've noticed is that Highlighting stuttering John and his alcoholism has helped a lot of people who would otherwise be going the same path. Hey, Carl, what's up, man? Speaking about sobriety, uh, yeah. It's, uh, ever since first part of understanding what the fuck was wrong with Sittering John,

I straight up quit and have been saying, what, five months out now? So yeah, somebody's fucking misery is somebody else's, you know, success. So keep it up, John. Keep going. That's great news, buddy. All right. It's interesting because John loves to say he's charitable.

He's always giving back. What else are we here for? He doesn't realize that the way he's helping people, he's not even trying. It's by him being a lazy alcoholic that's actually helping other people. It's the best thing he's done for people. It's incredible. I know, it's a weird thing to wrap your mind around, but. Well, I was wondering if maybe he helped OCD people also.

Yeah. You know, that have the sloppy kind like his Yeah That OCD thing is so weird to me. All right Joe Maderese called into the show He did a couple times last week too. He keeps calling our voice about wine Hey Carl, it's me Joe Maderese. I Heard you talking shit about me on your recent podcast. What the fuck bro? I thought we were cool I really am 93.7 Italian just like you're 93.17

Gabba go Gabba go to you Joe matter is We didn't call just once though he called it twice. There's Joe matter ease again Joey mattery Here, that'd like to throw my hat into the Lucy type box. You know, I got, you know, she makes my Italian blood boil and I'm running red hot baby. I'm an Italian stallion ready to fill that type box up with cannoli too. If you know what I'm saying. Yeah, I do. Yes. Sex. Baby. So, the discord writes, I think that's really

him. Could have been. I don't know. Oh, that was number. Oh, my uncle called into the show. Unk. No, not that one. Remember, I was talking about that commercial for child molestation? Not four child molestations, but bringing awareness to it. Is your child not molested enough? There are children in Africa, none of you are molested. Because a code implies. No one wants to fuck these kids.

Anyway, so there was that commercial they would say that little kid would be like I was wrestling with my uncle and it changed it felt icky and I didn't understand what that was. That's the context of this next voice from my uncle calling in. Yeah, this is Carl's uncle. And you know, back in day, Carl's told us commercial we wrestle with his uncle and, you know, he asked me about it it so I took the little rascal into the garage and we got to wrestle on a little bit And you know he's got sticky and you know, maybe I got a little sticky too. So love you Carl. Love you Rockle See you at the Hamburg reunion buddy. Thank you. Wait the rest of them I just want to point out that first up I go didn't fuck me, but if he did, I wouldn't

still be his type. Right? I'd be over that now. Well, you'll always have the garage. It's our special place. All right. Ronnie and Syracuse, coming to the show. Hey, Carl.

Ronnie and Syracuse. I wanted to make some comments about the most recent bonus episode with the bizarre love triangle between Chad, John, and Kate Me. It seemed like Patrick Melton was saying that Kate wasn't smart enough to be manipulating John and I don't know about Chad. But when the question came up, who's more attractive or who's better looking? And the answer was either John or Chad. And she said, John, that tells me right there that she's completely manipulating everything. But the other thing was I wanted to call John. So you think Chad's hot?

In this thing with Aaron. That's what I got. Yeah. Susanna's husband, where Aaron reached out to John and said, I'd like you not to talk about us on your podcast. Right. Podcast. And John's the one that's patent legal action and we're striking channels and all this crap over the wedding video because he doesn't want you to be talking about his family to leave his family alone and just goof on him.

And Aaron, as you guys pointed out, made a reasonable request that said, Hey, don't talk about us on your podcast. And John, the hypocrite again, what applies to everybody else, but doesn't apply to him. Anyway, don't call me back. Go figure. Could you imagine trying to figure out all the things John has done that's hypocritical?

It'd be much easier to do the opposite. Right. I do the lifetimes work. All right. Here's another one we got. Hey, Carl. This is 18th century chemist Agnes Pockels. Back in episode 400, you described Bert Krascher as weaving a pile of sweat on the stage. That is incorrect. He would have left a pud pile of sweat on the stage. That is incorrect. He would have left a puddle of sweat on the stage. You can learn more about surface tension at your local library. Take a look, it's in a book.

So Agnes Pockels was a German chemist whose research was fundamental in establishing the modern discipline known as surface science, which describes the properties of liquid and solid surfaces and interfaces. So I'm glad that that person called it to the show to correct me on that. We have quite the cross section of the video.

We do, it's very good. I tried to a lot of Germans on this. I also tried the metalheads. All right, man, I was just gonna say this, like the one time, probably gonna bitch about it for the rest of my life, but I can handle you like talking out of turn or whatever when it comes to like, king stuff or like, I don't know, other things,

like just like talking about shit you don't know about. That's fine, it's whatever, I don't fucking care. But when it comes to fucking metal music, music Carl stay in your goddamn lane all right not everybody's gonna be some boring ass band like we never heard of them I have just fucking stay in your lane bro oceans in Alaska fucking awesome all right I do 2010s crab core myspace era music. All right. So just fucking. I don't know. Figure it out or don't. I don't care. I'm not actually upset. I love you. Very good. Call sir. That's great Asians. Oh, Asians. Oceans eight Alaska. I don't think

I said anything bad about it. I just that was the band that Patty brought in and he described why he liked them because the band name is clever is what he said. So that was my only commentary on that. Mary Beth, favorite band? Favorite brand? Blue October. Blue October? Mm-hmm.

Look at you. Fucking hipster. Hipster over here in our midst. Is that hip? I don't know. I don't know. Mary Beth, people should definitely check you out on your OnlyFans. We'll have the link in the description of this episode if you're listening to it.

And also, we're looking forward to seeing you in Vegas. That's going to be a fun weekend. Yeah, I'm super excited. Is Cardiff going to be there? I think he's going to be a fun week. Yeah, I'm super excited. Is Cardiff going to be there? I think he's trying to make it happen. Make it happen. But we have two keys. It doesn't matter.

Yeah, well, two. You'll be there. So he's awesome. It doesn't matter if Cardiff shows up or not. Poor Cardiff. He was filling in for the B. Dablin live this morning. Yeah.

I guess Rocco had to work or something. So Cardiff comes out on his channel to do it with OJ. And immediately he's just like, I know everyone likes Rocco more than me. I can't. I'm not as good as him. I was like, oh, for Cardiff. Oh, by the way, point Dale point yesterday was fantastic.

I was very happy with how that episode came out. We had OJ on for the very first time along with Christian Blatt and Missy B and myself. And it was fun. We had a good breakdown of the week that was with Stuttering John Melendez. I enjoy those shows. They're very different than everything else I do. Yeah, I enjoy them too. It falls in a time slot where whether I'm on the show or not, I really enjoy kicking back. Yeah. You know, take a break from editing Lucy's fuck ups in the news. And she's usually spot on but a couple of times you got to tweak a little bit here and there. A little bit she dog. Sure.

But yeah, it's nice. Yeah. So I'll put that out. Audio only for our Patreon and Supercast folks, but it's available on our YouTube page. You can find that our latest point, Dabble Point. Mary Beth, love you. Thanks for having us with us today. Thank you. OK, bye.

Man, that was a good episode. That was a good episode. I enjoyed that. Ban ban ban ban, practice guy, world World Order BPGWO Okay, folks! Guess what? The episode's over! Ah, Carl. I love you.

Go fuck yourselves. Have a good week. Bye! A plane has hit. I rewatched at Carly. Boom! Like it'sly. Boom! Yes, mom! Boom! Boom!

Boom!