Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep697 - Vegan Abattoir

Episode Date: February 1, 2026

Kevin Smith does a show where he eats vegan food with his adult daughter. If that sounds terrible you’re right, it’s absolutely atrocious. They eat vegan tacos and pretend they taste like actual t...acos. Doubt it! Tab from Here’s What I Don’t Get joins us to explain Kevin just does this show to get free food. The Legion of Skanks recorded a bonus show where Luis J Gomez, Big Jay Oakerson, and Dave Smith got into a deep discussion about the Dabbleverse. Whitney Cummings stepped in it again; this time she infuriates millions of moms by clowning Miss Rachel. She guest hosted The Daily Show and made it all about her. Stuttering John created a new character, Da Duke of Da Future, and it’s embarrassingly bad. We finish with Internet News and your voicemails. Tab’s show: https://hereswhatidontget.com/  Support us, get bonus episodes, and watch live every Saturday and Wednesday: ⁠http://bit.ly/watp-patreon⁠ ⁠https://watp.supercast.tech/⁠ Come to Hackamania! April 10-12 in Las Vegas, use promo code WATP for 10% off – https://hackamania.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:03:30 We've all listened separately, not discuss it with each other beforehand. It's a show that's hosted by Kevin Smith and his daughter, Harley Quinn. Actually, you should reverse that. because he always puts her first because he think he's trying to give her a career. Is that what's going on? Yeah. Is he feel bad about giving her that name? So he's trying to make it up for her to her.
Starting point is 00:03:48 It's ridiculous. So there's the most recent episode of this show called Sina Vegan has 6,382 views. This is on Kevin Smith's YouTube channel that has 559,000 subscribers. So it might not speak to his audience, this show about veganism. But, Tab, before we get started with some clips here, what's your take on Kevin Smith? I was thinking, like one of the first road races we did together, you and I and some of the people we were talking about Patton Oswald. And you asked, was Patten Oswald ever funny? And you and I both agreed that, yeah, Patton was funny at one point.
Starting point is 00:04:29 And now he's just completely intolerable. And I think Kevin Smith's the same way. Like at one point, I kind of respected him. I liked his films. I liked his self-made, you know, like he. He created his own career by selling all of his shit to make clerks. And now he's just an intolerable terminally online early Gen Xer that I just can't stand seeing his stupid face. We are once again on the exact same page.
Starting point is 00:04:55 I really enjoyed Kevin's early movies. Of course, clerks is fantastic. Every sequel he's made of that has been dog shit, like embarrassingly so. And the Jay and Simon Bob's stuff that he's done has really jumped the shark and gotten horrible. the animated series, fucking, it's just, it's all so embarrassing. Yes. Yeah. So I'm not a big fan of his work after his first few movies, although his first few movies were great.
Starting point is 00:05:19 Dogma's great. I liked Mallrats a lot. Chasing, chasing Amy. Chasing Amy's really good. Yeah. So I have checked him out as a podcaster because he was early to the game with his smodcast. And he used to go on Open Anthony a lot and talk about his podcast. And I hated him on Open Anthony.
Starting point is 00:05:37 He fucking sucked down there. So I never was into his podcast. I never wanted to check it out. And he's doing this new show with his daughter. And the energy is obnoxious. Greetings culinary cucks and dairy. You went to the vegan abysmal. I'm Kevin Smith.
Starting point is 00:05:53 And I'm Harley Quinn Smith. Welcome to Vigannuary. Yes. Happy New Year. That's right. It's 2026, kids. And just like 2025, I'm sure it'll be incredible. It was a bit of sarcasm.
Starting point is 00:06:05 I think it is going to be. 2025 was a nut biter. I'll be honest with you, particularly at the end of 2025. Last time we shot the show, I had a mother. This time we're shooting the show? No mother. I mean, I had a mother, but she took off. She left this best of all possible world. My son-to-mother, Harley's, mom-ly, if you will.
Starting point is 00:06:21 Grandmother. I was thinking about it before we came up, I was like, oh, man. Like, everything is now a first. Oh, my God, this is the first time I've done this since my mother died. Oh, my God. This is the first time I've done this since my mother died and stuff. So, oh, this is how the show starts off. the most recent episode.
Starting point is 00:06:38 Fucking brilliant opener. Like, hey, welcome to the show. Bet you wish you were sad. And his daughter even has to console him as he's talking about how depressed he is. And his mom has passed away. Go to a therapist. Please. It's pretty wild that he would start off his show because he's got all that like energy.
Starting point is 00:06:56 Screwing about culinary cucks and blah, blah, blah. He's just like, oh, my mom died. I'm kind of bummed out about that. Cool. Oh, wow. Let's find out real quick. The first episode they did of this show, which is only a couple months old. And I guess they didn't have a podcast before this.
Starting point is 00:07:12 I think based on this clip, they filmed like everything that they released prior to this episode in last year. And then so the first episode through like what the fifth or sixth episode was all done in one day. And then they filmed this like last week. And now they've got another six in the tank. Probably. Yeah, it looked like they all dropped one month ago at the same time. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:34 So they had those all ready to go. Well, so this is the very first episode, and they explain why they're doing this podcast. For those out there who are like, fucking vegans, fuck you, which I've encountered many of those in the world, man. Let's take you back to the beginning of all this. Seven and a half years ago, something happened that we were, we kept out of the papers, we kept it very quiet, subtle, tasteful. I had a hard attack. Nobody knew about it. So fucking quiet.
Starting point is 00:08:05 The internet knew about it before I knew about it. That's true. I posted. It was like, maybe I should tell hardly. It was actually the most fucked up thing my life. Which is very traumatic, but thing in your life,
Starting point is 00:08:17 pretty good. Me posting before telling you, not even the heart attack part. I'm just going to treat this as the like the office now where every time you say something annoying, I'm just going to look to the camera and be like. Who are you, Jim or Pam? I'm obviously,
Starting point is 00:08:30 Jim. Fair enough. Fucking veganism. Cured my fucking heart. Praise. vegan Jesus. He had a heart attack almost eight years ago, became a vegan, and now he's asked to be one of these assholes.
Starting point is 00:08:42 Like, how do you know someone's a vegan? They'll tell you. Yeah. There isn't a vegan alive who keeps their mouth shut about it and just enjoy what they enjoy. I also love that, you know, so I think he goes on to say at one point in this episode, he talks about like, people are ticking time bombs. You have no idea. Like some people, they're fat and some people, they're skinny and they're ticking time bombs.
Starting point is 00:09:01 It's like, Kevin, you were fat. We all thought you were on the verse. urge of death since mall rats. Like, I didn't see him walking out of gyms any time the paparazzi was capturing him. But he bought all these jackets, you know, in the 90s and was like, this is going to be cool forever. And so he's just still wearing his fat guy jackets. It's like, you can't go get a jacket that fits your new more spelt form, Kevin.
Starting point is 00:09:26 What the fuck? You're right. He looks like the penguin. He looks like he's wearing his dad's clothes. He looks like he's a kid. Like, hey, look at me. I'm dad. I got to go to work.
Starting point is 00:09:35 going to wear my business suit. And your mom's like videotapes it and like, isn't that cute? He thinks you're an idiot, Dale. Not his mom, but. So. Oh, yeah, not his mom because she's dead. The editing in this is wild. So there's just the two of them sitting at a table. And we're going to watch the meat food for a while.
Starting point is 00:09:53 That's the big part of the show. And there has to be at least four camera angles, right? No. There's one camera angle. It's just the one wide lines and they just like find the different spots. At least for this one. When they have the guess, there might be two. But on this one, it's definitely, it's definitely constantly cutting.
Starting point is 00:10:10 I don't know if Kevin Smith can't form a sentence because there isn't a single sentence that goes by that there isn't a cut in. And so, I mean, it happens throughout the show. You'll see multiple examples of it. I also want to point out that they're using those DJ I little clip on loaves that TikTokers use. Yep. But they have them clip to forks, which I guess is I find less offensive than when they're just holding. the little stupid things and it like ties in with the theme but seriously like you're you're a million air film director get a real fucking microphone yeah i think they're being cute the dj i uh microphones on forks
Starting point is 00:10:48 irritating i will say pretty decent mic control though that's something i'm very critical especially of uh movie stars and celebrities when they do these podcasts they have no idea how to be near a microphone because they're used to just a boom mic picking up everything above them these guys actually talking to a bike, which is... Yeah. He comes to me to do us a long time, but still, good for him. He makes references that his daughter doesn't understand because his daughter's a lot younger than he is. Really? Yeah, go figure. That's crazy.
Starting point is 00:11:15 And I wasn't even holding out for a better offer. I was just like, I was like, Pierre, I don't care. Who's the other motherfucker? Mikey, he don't like it. He don't need nothing. You don't know the life commercials. Oh, no, you've... You've... The motherfucker Mikey, whoever was like, he won't eat it. And then he fucking ate it. That's very much a dad thing where the dad's made the same. joke for her entire life and been like, oh, you don't understand this. Like, no, no, no, I got it.
Starting point is 00:11:37 I got it when I was seven. Yep, you keep saying, Mikey, he likes it. Okay, good stuff. Where's the beef? Yeah, I heard that one, Dad. Good stuff. Very funny. Here's a great example of these jump cut edits. But I thought of my mom, just to close it up in the last two years of her life, when I would go down, and I'd go down frequently. Is that wild? That was wild. There was definitely audio changes in there. It's like every two words, they just, they cut something out. I don't know he stammering. And he says in the first episode that him and him and Harley are not editing this. They have like a professional editor.
Starting point is 00:12:10 So you got to imagine that poor bastard's life is just like listening to him ramble on and being like, how do I build a sentence out of this? Yeah. So when I used to edit the audio podcast, I have at the editor now, which is great. But I used to go in and edit every single episode. And I would go in and take out stammerers and clean things up. But if I was editing every three or four words, I'd lose my mind. That'd be so. frustrating to do.
Starting point is 00:12:34 And there's no shortage of words with this guy. But do you guys see what I mean? There's definitely multiple cameras here. Is this different than the first episode? This is different than that opener episode. Yeah. Okay. Because it just keeps like it's an MTV video from the 80s.
Starting point is 00:12:45 It just keeps cutting to a different thing every two seconds. Yeah, even though it's the same thing. Yeah, it's all just the same thing. So still talking about his mom and, you know, his mom wasn't a vegan. Do you have to be sad to be a vegan? Yes. Yes. It's fun to make sure.
Starting point is 00:13:01 It's a prerequisite. When was the last time they had a cheeseburger? I'd be sad to. They had a cheese. They had a cheese sandwich melty thing in the first episode. That was just like gross. It looked gross. No, but they went ape shit over it.
Starting point is 00:13:17 They did. They had to go ape shit over everything. It's ridiculous. Tim, you ever have a Beyond Burger? No. Me neither. Yeah. But apparently these things are amazing.
Starting point is 00:13:27 Whenever I went down, like one of my favorite things to do is go food shopping and just buy her like tons of ice cream and shit. Nothing vegan. but I buy Beyond burgers. And I would make Beyond Burgers for her. And she loved it. She was always like, Tiger, will you make me a Beyond Burger?
Starting point is 00:13:40 Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Mommy. Yeah, yeah. The fact that his daughter's talking like a child here is disturbing. Yeah. She's got to be, what, 30? She's 26.
Starting point is 00:13:51 Yeah. Oh, yeah. Momaly. Okay. We're all grown up here. I'm doing a show. I've heard people, you know, when Burger King did the Beyond Burger, where people were blind taste testing it.
Starting point is 00:14:06 And everyone I knew that didn't, that was like already on the veggie train was like, oh, you can't tell the difference. And everyone I knew who was not on the vegetarian train was like, this shit is awful. Yeah, I've never tasted one, but I know that they're very bad for you. It's just like, if you don't want to eat a cow, then have this, but it's really way worse. Yeah. There's so much train in shit in here. Right.
Starting point is 00:14:30 And so it's odd that their father and daughter opening up the episode talking about how Kevin's dad, her grandmother just passed away. And it gets really real. How's your head and heart? Well, first of all, long live, momily. Long live, momly. Although ironically. But yes. But in our hearts and our house.
Starting point is 00:14:53 She ain't going nowhere. She right here. And if you look for Momley, look no further. Look no further. She lives on and us genetically we're connected to her and stuff. Oh, is that, that's how? Oh, yeah, no, that makes sense because if she's your mom, then, yeah, she's probably the reason why you have a bad heart that got jammed up with all of the ice cream. That's the thing.
Starting point is 00:15:14 So in the first episode, they're talking about how he lost all this weight and blah, blah, blah, from switching it being vegan. And it's like, well, no, you lost all this weight because you stopped, like, eating, like, ice cream and cake and candy and shit. And, like, you started eating fibrous vegetables that fill you up and don't take. 10,000 calories to do it. Like, yeah, I'm happy that you're healthy and veganism was the path, but you could have just made different dietary choices and still had to steak once in a while and also shut the fuck up. I've met fat vegans.
Starting point is 00:15:41 Have you ever encountered a fat vegan before? I've seen some tubby vegans, yeah, vegans and vegetarians, yeah. Yeah, it's not hard to do. You can eat fried potatoes. Oh, yeah. All the time. So it's not like veganism equals healthy eating or low fat or I guess fat's not the issue, but like high carb and shit,
Starting point is 00:15:59 like you're still gonna get fat from that. But yes, this is very forced this conversation. How's your head and your heart? And then it turns into this whole thing where it's like she lives on. I was like, this is a private conversation you could have done before the show started. It would have been fine.
Starting point is 00:16:11 So then producer just joins the show to talk about what's in store for them. Some people say no. Our producer says, Jess, what you've been up to? Happy Vigua. I'm doing fine.
Starting point is 00:16:21 I mean, you know, 2025 also kicked my ass a little bit. In what way? You know, a little heartbreak, dealing with... We're all dealing with. loss. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Well, grief. It's kind of crappy because you're like, I don't want to start the year like this, but it's the real world. You don't get to pick, man. You don't. What the fuck is going on? What is this show about?
Starting point is 00:16:41 Everyone's depressed. Hey, everybody. This is what I'm sad about this week. Jesus Christ. Them tithes are depressing. Good point. Those tithes are not vegan. I'll tell you that.
Starting point is 00:16:58 Like, I'm going to eat away all my sorrows with this pile of whatever slop that they've brought us for free this week. Yeah, so let's find out what is on tap because you guys have seen episodes of this. And I watch enough food network shows that I know you have to go absolutely fucking bananas over whatever the food is going to be. And then when you get the food, it's fucking the greatest thing ever. And then when you're done eating the food, you can't be talking about it. You got to make yummy sounds. Food that you hate. All right. What are we eating today? Who are we eating today? And when the fuck are we eating
Starting point is 00:17:34 vegan? This is the reaction I wanted. I fuck with Santa Vegan. And I do. I literally have ordered Santa Vegan many times on DoorDash. And also, I didn't eat all morning. So I'm like, I'm going to eat the fuck out of some Sennavegan. I had no idea. Did it know? I can vouch for these cats, man. Shut the fuck up. This is another thing that drove me nuts listening to this was they have these mics on. They didn't phase invert one of them. So it gets this weird phasing
Starting point is 00:18:08 where he sounds like he's like talking through one of those reverb microphones we had as kids. Yeah. And it was making me fucking nuts. It's like, what is your editor doing? Fucking change the phase on one of these
Starting point is 00:18:24 so that this effect doesn't happen. Yeah, considering how professional this whole thing looks and like I was saying, it's highly edited, you'd think they'd clean something like that up. I know. I was watching this. I had to keep checking to see my laptop speakers were on instead of my monitors. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:39 It has that kind of quality to it. You're just like, is this coming out of somewhere else? All right. So did you see Harley Quinn fucking lose her mind over a son of vegan? She's like, wow! Do you remember my mom died? Let's keep it in check. Momoli, that's right, I forgot.
Starting point is 00:18:57 Momily. Is there anywhere for dinner that you would like have that kind of reaction? Like if your wife came home and was like, hey, we're going to Ruth Chris night. You'd be like, whoa! It's almost like it's like Peewey's Playhouse. Said a vegan. She said the secret word. Whoa!
Starting point is 00:19:17 Losing their fucking mind. Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of restaurants that make a lot of food that I enjoy. And it turns out that I can go and enjoy that food kind of whenever I want. So I don't get all that excited about it. I mean I was a little kid if my mom was like going to get McDonald's, I'd be excited about that. Yes. But that's when I was six.
Starting point is 00:19:36 Yeah. I used to dunk chicken McNuggets and honey. So I didn't really know what the fuck I was doing back then. Oh, the culinary delights. All right. So there's ad reads in this too, which is why I pointed out, there's only 6,000 views on this video. I can't imagine they're making a lot of money off ad reads, but they have a couple of them. And boy is Kevin Corny.
Starting point is 00:19:59 Hey, kids, you want to hear something neat? Is Cretto. That's right, Cretto, oat milk, cheese. Do you, do you, I feel like he's invested in this. He's like an investor. It seems that way, because he is really hocking some schlock. Yeah. Which is these ads.
Starting point is 00:20:15 One of the ad reads, he's like, stop fucking around with salsa. I'm like, whoa, salsa is absolutely vegan and it's delicious. Yeah. It's one of the good ones. Yeah. There's nothing in there that you can't eat or won't eat. Well, so I don't know. I think granola would also be an example of a vegan food product.
Starting point is 00:20:33 I would think, I mean, maybe I'm off on that. But boy, is Kevin excited about this. Whenever I go into the grocery store, I always linger in the granola. Oh, do you? Yeah, yeah. I feel like I've been around for the introduction of granola. I know it happened earlier than the 70s, but it got real popular in the 70s. Remember asking my parents, can we get some of this granola?
Starting point is 00:20:56 And my parents were like, that's commie food. something, I don't know. Years later now, I can eat my own granola. I don't need permission from my parents. It's so strange. You don't need permission from your parents either, man. Boring. What happened to this man's career that he has to go on YouTube
Starting point is 00:21:13 and be like, I love lingering in the granola section at the supermarket? Isn't that the greatest last time? What? Do you think Kevin Smith actually went to the grocery store? Probably daily. I don't think he's that rich anymore. I think he's invested in some really bad movies. flopped. Well, I mean, but think about
Starting point is 00:21:31 we're in the age of Instacart. You don't need to go nowhere. And I remember he did a stand-up special like in the early 2000s talking about food, having groceries delivered. So I don't think he's hanging out in the granola aisle anywhere. Well, this
Starting point is 00:21:46 ad copy is ponderous. Do you want to join the granola club? Do you want to not have to go to the food store and lose time in a granola induced coma as you're trying to figure out There's so many granoles out there. There's only one that you need, man.
Starting point is 00:22:01 It's plant strong. Is he, like, improvving that? Is that what was written down? You know, I'm getting up there. I'm worried about my heart. If I have a heart attack, I'm going to turn into this. Yeah, I hope you just die. It's unlikely.
Starting point is 00:22:17 I hope you just don't come back from it. Me too. That'd be so much better. All right. So the food comes out, and they're going to be really calm about it and just be like, acknowledge it. Like, oh, okay, good. Dignified.
Starting point is 00:22:30 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll be enjoying this food, I bet. Today we're eating food from the sensational Santa Vigens with Carmen Sampi. Breakfast is served. Whoa. One of them was howling. Like a cartoon coyote. And seeing like a hot lady coyote.
Starting point is 00:22:53 Yeah. Auga. We did see in the wide shot, though, they're using those gimbal DJs. DJI TikToker cameras and they have at least two of them on their table plus the one that was handheld. So you're right. They're using their multi-camera shooting. I didn't even catch that. Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:23:09 popped up there on Apple boxes. Apple boxes and actual thing used in the film industry. DJI camera is something that's used by TikTokers for 300, 400, 400 bucks a pop. Yeah, you're right. There's a camera back there and then a couple on the table. So they have the individual shots and then the one that they can back up and zoom in on. and boy, they are so excited to meet Carmen, who is the co-owner of this restaurant.
Starting point is 00:23:36 Also, this is in their house. There's something to be said about kind of being, you know, you talk to them before, hey, welcome to the house. I'm Kevin, I'm Harley, blah, blah, blah. What do you got? Like, we logically know this, watching this, that they, and then they still, like, overperform.
Starting point is 00:23:53 And I would think they would be for TikTok, but they're not filming it vertically. So I don't know who it's for. Yeah, that's a really good point how fake this all is. The fact that they have to be like, whoa, how did you get here? And you brought food?
Starting point is 00:24:05 Yeah. I was hungry. It's like Mr. Rogers, who's at the door? Who could it be? Oh, my God. Mr. McPhealy every week? You've got a film about how they make crayons?
Starting point is 00:24:15 But Mr. Rogers knew how to play it. He did. Yeah, he was full better at it. I was just as surprised as he was. I always thought that he was my neighbor. All right. So, yeah, this is Kevin's energy is over the top here. this is Senevegan and this is Carmen.
Starting point is 00:24:32 Carmen, what is your connection to the amazing food at Senevegan, which I have fucked with many times. I'm ordered from Dordash over and over and from Uber and eats, man. So I'm way familiar with the restaurant. But what is your connection to food? I'm one of the co-founders of Senevagan. Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:24:48 Thank you. Thank you for your service. Who else are they going to send? Who else are they going to send? A founder or the actual chef. Yeah, it's just like, no, no, I'm just your Uber delivery driver today. This is Jamal, our Uber delivery driver. Jamal, what can you tell us about this restaurant you deliver us from?
Starting point is 00:25:10 It's a lot of traffic today. There's a shelf when you walk in and you get the food. Can I go now? Did you hear what Harley Quinn said at the end there? She wasn't sure what to say. Listen to us. Cool founders of somebody. Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:25:26 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for your service. I think that's offensive to veterans, right? Thank you for your service. Oh, I don't know. I don't know what that means. All right.
Starting point is 00:25:38 So now they have to talk about these food items. And one of the things that annoys me about, here's what I don't get about veganism, is that rather than just eat all the food you can eat, all the vegetables and fruits and I don't know, there's probably other things too. I'm not sure. Soy products.
Starting point is 00:25:57 Rather than just, like, eat that stuff, they have to turn it into things that look like delicious food that anyone would eat. Right. It has to be, like we said, a Beyond Burger, has to be a taco. Fake grill marks and shit. Yeah. Yeah. It's bizarre, but this is an example. And the very first one is the barbacoa.
Starting point is 00:26:15 It's cooked in a smoky adobe sauce. It's a little bit sweet. So it looks like porkish kind of thing? It kind of does. But in this case, it's soy. It's soy-based. It's all soy nice. A barbaco is not pork
Starting point is 00:26:27 She was like yeah sure Whatever you want to be We just threw a label in there Have you ever eaten vegan food? Have you ever gone to a vegan restaurant? I've definitely been to a vegan restaurant, yes Yeah, I went to a vegan restaurant In college with it because the woman I dated
Starting point is 00:26:42 Was a vegetarian Yeah, that's how it goes Yeah, it was the worst fucking food I've ever had It was just like completely inedible, tasteless mush And you know, this burrito that I got had just nothing but quinoa in it and the side was more quinoa and i was just like what the fuck is this and it's 14 dollars uh and this kind of shit too it's like i look at this and i'm like i know that this is you know these are like 25 30 dollar plates and it just it's just piled
Starting point is 00:27:11 every meal that i've seen from this show is just piles of random shit and vegetables right throwing together like this is a salad these are tacos this is you know hummus and it's like just okay fuck off honestly if the food was good they wouldn't have to tell you how good it is all the time you would just already know which i think is why they have to be like oh no vegan's the way it's so amazing like if that's true i'll figure it out yeah turns out that's not true because i haven't figured it out um all right so you never you never walk into a restaurant and be like oh no it's this is all vegan food you'd walk in and you'd be like hey this sounds good these barbicot tacos made with soy yeah yeah if that were the case you'd be like all right cool
Starting point is 00:27:52 I didn't know. I just got myself in too, but sounds fantastic. Now, Kevin Smith has a joke here, and I'll spoil it a little bit. This is clipped at the beginning for the cold open to give you an example how funny this show is. So this is the biggest pop that we're going to get. Damn. All right. I'm going to dig in while we do that. Are you calling a taco? Do you want to just share? Am I called to a taco? Yeah. I don't want to take it. And you're like, that's the one I wanted.
Starting point is 00:28:21 And then you're on a therapist couch going like, he ruined my childhood and he ruined my tacos. And he took my fucking dog. Good stuff. Glorious. I love the dynamic between the father and daughter on this one. Yeah. Really good.
Starting point is 00:28:34 All right. Carmen starts talking on and on and on and on about how this restaurant was started while these two are just eating. I can't imagine who this content is for. Who would give a shit? Don't worry. I spent it up. And so he had some seven-day Adventist volunteers that helped them do that work.
Starting point is 00:28:50 So he wouldn't have to do it. himself and he said look next time we come finish the rest of the project i will feed you tacos fast forward i don't know five six months later my husband unfortunately had lost his job but he kept this promise that he was going to feed him tacos we did the math we're like i said we about eight hundred to buy the protein that we need to make the tacos he's like no way he said how hard can be to make this stuff. And so he went to you to make this stuff we're trying to make this stuff. He went to you went on the internet to figure out to figure out. It can be that difficult. And then it was say time because that's what we do at home but we didn't buy it. He
Starting point is 00:29:12 he goes, you know, I think I got it. I said, you know, all the other stuff you made is great. What's wrong with it? He goes, it is spongy just like everything in the I want something that has a texture and chew it is a beef. But I think I got it. I think I know what I need to do to make it just like I think it should be. So he asked, can you make me some maranates? Like when we used to make Garnasada, I'm going to get Garnasada. So I made in the marinerates, I left for work.
Starting point is 00:29:24 And when I came back from work, as soon as I walked in the door, he hands me a taco. He goes, you got to try this. I think I got it. I remember biting into the taco thinking, my God, this is like chewing on me. This is so close to the real thing. I'm like, this is incredible. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:29:41 Uh-huh. Listen, shut up for a second. Jesus Christ. And by the way, it started before that, it goes out after that. I was just like, I got to find it starting to end for this fucking thing sometime. Holy shit, the story. And these two idiots are just like fucking shoveling food in their face. I'm waiting for one of them to accidentally eat the microphone.
Starting point is 00:29:58 I was thinking the same thing. I want one of them to just pop it off and go completely feral. Listen, I know our show does not look very slick or professional. I'm aware of that. But the fact that they have to keep changing camera. goes during this is so unnecessary. It's distracting. Yeah. There's just two people sitting and eating this food. We don't have to like show the overhead shot and then from this angle over here, then zoomed in and then zoomed out.
Starting point is 00:30:25 Well, it's also funny because they don't do any of the other like food channel stuff where, you know, they'll put it like on a turntable with like nice lighting and it'll spin around and the someone will be like, and now we have vegetarian tacos made with siton and barbacoa chili soy sauce and, you know, and like describing it all for you and before they actually eat it. It's just, it's like, it's just, hey, what if instead of paying for Uber Eats, we trick these restaurant owners into bringing us a bunch of shit? And then we'll just throw them up on YouTube for 5,000 views and get a free lunch. I mean, they pretty much come out and say that that's the reason why they do this is to be able to get free food from these restaurants. And we'll
Starting point is 00:31:05 get to that just a moment because I can't imagine he's doing any good for this place that serves a eight-mile radius somewhere in LA. Yeah. How many of the 6,000 people watch this video are going to be ordering from that because of it? But again, they're trying to... Hey, yeah, is this the Saitown place? Great, cool. Do you guys deliver in St. Louis?
Starting point is 00:31:28 No. Well, I saw you on Kevin Smith's podcast, Ben. That's kind of interesting. Oh, well, I might be out in L.A. in 2027. You guys still going to be there? Can I get a reservation? Nope. Actually, you know what we should do is we should call these places and order Uber Eats to Dick Masterson's house.
Starting point is 00:31:46 That's a good idea. Just order a shit ton of vegan food for him. That would be great. And then don't tell him and just listen to the next Dick show. We kept getting these fucking Uber Eats orders and it's just vegan food. I can't even eat it. I thought it was a fucking taco. I bite into it.
Starting point is 00:32:01 The shit isn't a taco. Oh, that would be hilarious. And I think he would be fooled because that's what these people love doing is trying to make people think that they're eating. meat when they aren't. And it goes through multiple pieces of equipment to be able to achieve that texture and that little char that's in it. No bullshit kids. I know I haven't eaten meat in like eight years. Next month will be my eight year vegan anniversary. Oh wow. Congratulations. Watch. I'm going to put the arm. God damn it. I don't have the texture. It's the barbicle is insane. It's so bizarre. And Tab, to your point, I want to get into a whole nutrition conversation. I'm obviously not an expert on that.
Starting point is 00:32:37 but this whole thing where it's like oh my gosh if I even ate a piece of meat my heart would explode so I haven't been able to touch it in eight years like no you if it's not for like animal cruelty reasons which it sounds like it's not first I don't know why veganism is the answer you think you could just like cut meat out whatever
Starting point is 00:32:52 and then it just be like holy shit this actually tastes like meat like me sounds like you want a piece of meat man help yourself it very much sounds that way yeah it's sadness it's truly sadness well I mean I had chicken before we started the show today it's great
Starting point is 00:33:07 I had some brisket enchiladas. You cruel bastards. So good. I wanted to have a whole rotissory chicken during this segment. I just be like plucking off like a mini evil lord. Oh, you don't like all the greasy meat, Kevin? I just have a turkey leg from the Renaissance Fair. Shout him down on.
Starting point is 00:33:27 That would have been fun. So apparently this woman was making food. And once they figured out the secret to making tacos that fool people, she started having friends over and fooling them. We started feeding it to our friends and to our family. And it was great because they're like, wait, that was vegan? I'm like, that wasn't even beef. Fuck you!
Starting point is 00:33:47 Isn't that kind of, you know, like, hey, have these brownies. I'm like, oh, I've got nut allergies. They're nuts. And I'm like, no, no. You're right. It's like, fuck you, man. I don't want to eat your bullshit soy. Just close what you're making.
Starting point is 00:34:03 Right. And then she says something, I don't think. as a restaurant owner, you should even float this out there as a possibility. One thing is to make a meal in your kitchen and feed it to people. It's another thing to mass produce it and feed it to a lot of people. There's a lot of risk if you make a mistake and you make people sick. I didn't want to do that. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:34:24 There's a lot of risk to make you mistake and getting people sick. Yeah. No, no, no. Edit that out, please. Do you not put that out here? Please come to my restaurant. We might make you sick. If I'm the husband, I'm like, Carmen, I can't send you.
Starting point is 00:34:36 any of these anymore. What the fuck is wrong with you? No, the way to say that is like it's a different to mass produce it and like still maintain the quality and flavors. Right. Now, I could get people sick. Yes. Just one tiny little mistake. Kitchen has that sign six days without botulism or whatever. You guys want to get to some more parents are dead talk? Oh yeah. I know I do. The reason they're so important to me is my mom died when I was very young. And so I was 17. Oh my God. I'm so sorry. It's okay. Yeah. It's like 50 years ago, man.
Starting point is 00:35:10 He's like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. It's like, no, I just thought that's what you talk about when you come out of this show. You know, that's not what everyone talks about? This is my first time being on a podcast where we hold forks to put the mics up to our mouths since my mom died. You know, every day's a first. All right. So it turns out, Carmen is a bit of a sellout. This is disappointing.
Starting point is 00:35:31 It was totally against us having nachos. No, really? Why? Why? So good. Because they're not authentic. I guess that's right, right? Like that's a bastardization.
Starting point is 00:35:40 Exactly. I was against it. But at a festival, that's what sells the most is the notches. I'm really glad you made the not. Yeah. The notches are. I like them too. Authentic or not, man, they're pretty far.
Starting point is 00:35:50 Is Harley retarded? Yes. She's related to Kevin Smith. Yeah. It's, I don't know what this show is. I don't know who's supposed to be for. It's a great scheme. man.
Starting point is 00:36:07 It is. Don't you wish like you had hit some kind of minor, even, I mean, Kevin Smith's maybe a C-Lister, B-lister, and now he just has restaurants bringing him expensive food to eat. They're probably preparing it in his kitchen. He's probably like, yeah, come on over, cooking in my kitchen and serve it to me. I have these cameras set up. Maybe someone will see it. Who knows?
Starting point is 00:36:29 And then Harley Quinn makes it all about her. The tamales are so special to my, he was my boyfriend. and now he's my fiance. Congratulations. Thank you. His family. Because of the tamales. I understand that.
Starting point is 00:36:43 He'll do that. Yeah, who cares about the tamales and your fiance? That is his singer. You ready for the call to action? This is the important part of the show. Thank you. Send of vegan kids. Go order it right now if you're within an earshot of us in the area and whatnot.
Starting point is 00:36:58 But they'll travel. We will travel. Yeah. You'd be crazy not to. This food is hell of delicious. we were talking about before we started the show, movie review podcasts, where these movie enthusiasts love movies.
Starting point is 00:37:14 They're like, I watch this movie, it's fucking great. And after a while, you're like, why would I listen to anything this person has to say? They just like every movie they see. Yes.
Starting point is 00:37:20 It's the same thing with the stupid food review stuff. Kevin, Kevin says, wow, this food is unbelievable. You'd be fucking crazy to not order this food. The very first second you get a chance to.
Starting point is 00:37:30 You're like, I mean, you seem to like everything now, man. Rather watch Frenchiata. Actually, she just dropped a new one. Did she? Yes.
Starting point is 00:37:36 What is she reviewing? Can he tell us? It looks like different breads. Okay. The thing is, too, there's got to be what 10,000, 40,000 restaurants in the greater L.A. area that you can get, you know, food that you actually like. Like, I'm sure I could get all this same ship with actual meat in it. Right. And I would enjoy that much more.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Wouldn't that be delightful? Yeah. All right. So you've alluded to this a couple of times here, Tab. This is the real reason why they started the show. The genius of this show, I feel, has always been the food we normally eat. Now we're going to eat for free. Yep.
Starting point is 00:38:13 Yep. That's what it comes down to. He's like, hey, hook us up. Why don't I pretend you paid for it? Why is he so braggadocious about the fact that they're not paying for this food that they're eating? It's a good point. Right? It doesn't be the last thing I would bring up.
Starting point is 00:38:26 It's smug. It's like I'm so famous that people are just tripping over themselves to lavish me with their delicious food. You know what I never say? Hey, check out this magic mind. I get him for free. I get to drink magic mind every day for free. Fuck you. That's a weird thing to say, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:38:44 Yeah. Did you pay for your magic mind? Yeah. Oh, well, you're a sucker. With Amex Platinum, you have access to over 1,400 airport lounges worldwide. So your experience before takeoff is a taste of what's to come. That's the powerful backing of Amex. Conditions apply.
Starting point is 00:39:05 Local news is in decline across Canada, and this is bad news for all of us. With less local news, noise, rumors, and misinformation fill the void, and it gets harder to separate truth from fiction. That's why CBC News is putting more journalists in more places across Canada, reporting on the ground from where you live, telling the stories that matter to all of us, because local news is big news. Choose news, not noise. CBC News
Starting point is 00:39:34 All right, I have a very interesting clip package here. This just came through this afternoon. Apparently, I unfortunately, I don't have the video version of this. I just have the audio version. But Legion of Skanks did a bonus show
Starting point is 00:39:54 behind the paywall on Friday. And, or it just dropped yesterday. But this is their bonus show, and they can. get into dabalverse talk. Now, Lewis J. Gomez recently called into the Blind Mike Project while Tuky was on and they were talking about whether or not the devil verse is gay and who, in fact, in the devilverse is gay. And of course, you got Big Jay Ocerson who's on Legion of Skanks and he's way into the Davilverse. We've seen him super chat, point, dabble point before and he watches
Starting point is 00:40:23 the shows. He doesn't do it. He brings it up from time to time. And then you have Dave Smith who doesn't give a fuck about any of us and has way better things to be thinking about doing than ever get into dabbleverse talk. But they bring up the topic because apparently at Skankfest this year, there's a lot of talk of Stuttering John boxing Chad Zumak.
Starting point is 00:40:43 So Lewis brings this up to see if anyone's interested in this. But a lot of people are like, yeah, dude, you don't understand, man. You got to get fucking, you got to get Tuky and Blind Mike a live show at Skankfest and have Stuttering John and Zumach fight. It's like, come on, you have no idea how motivated the Dabbleverse.
Starting point is 00:41:01 is and I was like guys anybody in the dabalverse knows about legion of skanks already there's not like there it's just like this small subsect of the internet that it's like we don't we don't need what is it what is the dabble verse exactly what shows are in it is that what's like the who are these podcast guys i literally only know the name from hearing you to say the dabble verse yeah that's dave smith i don't know what the devil verse is man this is really a real thing but props to big jokerson for saying yeah who are these podcasts wATP What are the other shows? Which, by the way, you'll find out if you watch my new show,
Starting point is 00:41:35 Davelverse Live, available wherever you listen to Find Podcasts. You can find Davelverse Live in audio form. We also do it on YouTube. It'll either be on my channel or Blind Mike's channel every Thursday at 4 p.m. Although this Thursday is going to be 8 p.m. But normally 4 p.m. Eastern, Devilverse Live. We're covering all things, Davelvers. So these guys try to figure out the origin.
Starting point is 00:41:56 And it's interesting that it starts off by them saying, like, you know, Lewis, I understand he's built a really big thing with gas digital and skank fest and everything he's been doing so i could see why he'd look at the devilvers would be like oh there's like a few dozen idiots who are laughing at stuttering john don't care about that uh they'll learn more about it but they start it starts off a little rough but i don't know what the term comes from or anything like i don't know the actual origin but i think the initial thing was like shooly making fun of suttering john john and then kevin brandon started doing like hate watch podcasts so i think at the center of it is kind of like Suttering John as a jackass that everyone makes fun of.
Starting point is 00:42:33 And then everyone started building shows around. That's the son. I guess like an alcoholic or something. In this universe. So it's truly started it by making fun of Sutter Jailer. Close enough. You know, that's fine. No, it's funny because it's like, you know,
Starting point is 00:42:46 there's always discussion about why did, you know, where did the 9-11 conspiracy come from? You know, there was only 20 years ago. And here we are, you know, just six or seven years out from Christy Mayer's famous interview with Stuttering John where she asked to, asked to be dabbled in comedy. and became the dabbler and that became the dabble verse and like that history has just been lost in the sea of of other texts that have come out and till the burning of Alexandria when your YouTube channel and your podcast is finally taken down by this righteous lawsuit against you Carl. Right.
Starting point is 00:43:16 No, it's funny. There's a lot of like weird sayings people have that I look up the, you know, the meaning of or the origin of. And there's like a lot of things. We don't even know why people say this. It doesn't make any sense, but it's just always been said. So yeah, there'll be a day when it's just like, yeah, we just called the devilverse. Why? And that's what they call it.
Starting point is 00:43:34 Yeah, there's only theories about it. Yeah. Why would? I don't know. But they all seem very excited about talking about this subject, which is great. And then everyone started orbiting around stuttering John. And then there's all these other little planets with their own solar systems now. And it's like, there's like certain shows that have 12 viewers.
Starting point is 00:43:52 All three of them talking at once are like, what are they talking about? They're like, wait, wait, wait, what are they showing? What are they talking about? This sounds interesting. And you're not going to like this tab. Because they are way off on what, and why it's the dabbler verse. Did they go like dabble, dabble, dabble, dabble, like, as they're orbiting. Like, where did that word come from?
Starting point is 00:44:13 That I don't know. But they, um, isn't it like the Ray DeVito, like, is part of that whole thing too. And Chad and Kevin Brennan. That's like their whole world. He's the furthest planet from the sun. And there's the, who are these podcasts that kind of just goes at everybody and kind of like just picks apart. the podcasts,
Starting point is 00:44:28 uh, in general. Appreciate you, Jay. Thank you very much. But I like that Ray DeVito gets brought up a few times because they do their show from the stand on Mondays. They do their show live.
Starting point is 00:44:37 And I think Ray DeVito is a regular at the stand. So I think they cross paths a lot with Ray. And Ray is adjacent to the dabover. He's been on this show before. We've made fun of them a few times. Maybe he was crudged at the week pretty recently with that chick. It was zuted out of her mind. Um,
Starting point is 00:44:56 and then, of course, you know they they give some love to blind mic because louis j gomez really does appreciate blind mike i've heard the show like it's blind mic project right like a show i see like the clips and stuff yeah no he's actually awesome because he's actually a fan of comedy he's a fan of comedy so he like does like half like making fun of the dabble verse stuff but also half just like talking about what's going on in the comedy world he was um a uh what do they call barstool guy he like worked on barso sports for a while he was like the blind guy on one of the bigger shows. Kirkman and show, yes, very good.
Starting point is 00:45:30 So I like that they're trying. They're trying to figure out who the players are and what their roles are. Tuki gets some love. Yeah, I mean, I did Blind Mike's podcast a couple weeks ago, and he was like, I was on with Tuki, who is a puppet. Oh, yeah, yeah, I've seen that in the little squares on the shows. I was booked for that show. I got bumped by Tuki.
Starting point is 00:45:52 The two books you? You got the one bumped to you? But that's one you don't get upset about. It's bound to happen, dude. It's almost a badge of honor. Badge of honor at this point. So Dave Smith chimes said, you know, making a joke about, yeah, I got bummed because Tuky's still popular.
Starting point is 00:46:06 Tuck is actually pretty popular. Yes. It's a pretty good get if you can get them on your show. But I get the joke that Dave is making there. And Dave has no idea what's going out with any of this. So he's just trying to play along. So anyway, they're describing what they know of the dabbled verse and who are the players are and stuff.
Starting point is 00:46:22 But let's get back to, is there any. interest in Melendez versus Zumach at Skankfest. So they want to box it? You don't have any interest in Stuttering John and Chad Zumach boxing? No, I mean, unless you guys really do. If you guys want to see it, I'm not like, oh my God, fuck the dabble verse. Like I get how it's kind of funny. It's this little subsect of a world, but it's just not, I just feel kind of cheap being
Starting point is 00:46:46 involved. No, I got you. I don't know about anything else other than I said. I would just like, as far as having people do shows and podcasts, I have no idea about that but watching Chad Zumuck and starring John Box would be funny yeah for sure that would be funny and also I guess I would enjoy watching that yeah steel toe
Starting point is 00:47:01 morning show that's another guy he wants to box Harrington yeah that's another thing so here's the thing though you're never gonna get Zumach and Melendez in the ring together but they will do a lot of shit talking for the couple months of lead up and then they'll both
Starting point is 00:47:17 have some reason why they can't be there and then the other guy but the other guy quit first oh yeah they both will check it out of this if they pretend to commit to it. The contest to have between them is a drinking contest and you put them in teams and you get them totally dried out for three days and then you put them in the boxing ring with just cases and cases of course and you see which one of a passes out first. Can you tweet that to Louis J. Gomez for me right now, Mr. Chris?
Starting point is 00:47:44 That's brilliant. That is what they should be doing at Skagfest. I am. That's what they're good at. I'm front row if that happens. Yeah, I am there for that. He's in the splash zone. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:47:58 It's not exactly sweat from the boxers, but close enough. I'm trying to catch it in my mouth. Like those fucking horrors, they go around and pour shots from the bottle in people's mouths. I'm that guy. So you just heard them bring up our buddy Aaron Imholt from Steeltoe Morning Show. and Big Jay knows about this as well. Well, somebody also in this world got in trouble for sending naked pictures
Starting point is 00:48:29 and like maybe went to jail a little bit and a couple that did a show together broke up. It's like there's actual like drama within it which is pretty like that's my problem is like it gets a little bit like it moves off the internet and they start to like docks each other and get each other swatted and like yeah there's like a lot of like the problem I'm in real trouble for like sending a dirty picture or something.
Starting point is 00:48:50 Yes, that is correct. Aaron did go to jail for sending Revenge porn. Kayla Riccata's nude to Gino Pisconti. And you can tell these guys love the Davelverse. They're resisting it. Lewis is as they talk about it.
Starting point is 00:49:05 Yeah, and also I heard this thing happen and that thing. Like they're all in on this. Get off your high horse. Yeah, come on. Join us. Join us. Please. So they're like,
Starting point is 00:49:14 they're discussing the tabloid headlines that they saw on the grocery store, check out the National Inquirer stuff. and kind of kind of fingered while they were waiting for the they're like no no no I don't I don't read it I didn't buy it once I bought it once you know so anyway I guess bad boy is now in Indonesia and they're tracking him down but no I don't care about that stuff either I'm not following bat boy
Starting point is 00:49:36 so then their producer comes in and decides to explain what is actually going on how the devilverse came to be I found a whole retarded Reddit thread that has the history of the dabbled verse for retards. Yeah, nice. I'd like that. I'm a retard. Sure, I'll bring that up. I'd like to read that first and then maybe get into some more
Starting point is 00:49:59 advanced dabbleburst, dabble burst. He's like, I'll do the for dummies book now, but then eventually I'll graduate to the 201 course. The tavel first. I like how strong she comes in. Like, yeah, I found this this retarded pose for retards there. You know.
Starting point is 00:50:16 You guys want to stupid at this level? Because we can do it if you want to. He seems like the only one that's not interested in this. He's just like, these fucking guys with their stupid. Well, I got to give props my buddy Big J for some more WATP love here. Stuttering, John, they're talking about. John, for the last decade, has been unemployable and try to be a podcaster and failed several times. A podcast review show called Who Are These Podcasts reviewed one of his attempts,
Starting point is 00:50:41 and he went irate and threatened the two hosts physically. So that's the start of it all. What's funny is, who are these podcasts? I did an episode, they wouldn't talk about me, right? I guess I think they were fans. They were, like, they didn't, they don't want to. I met, uh, I met Carl before up in Rochester. Good dude, very funny.
Starting point is 00:50:57 Thanks, Jay. Um, so I was actually surprised that Lewis remembers this. Because on real ass podcast, we reviewed it. Me and Doug from, from, um, who's right, reviewed the real ass podcast with Zach amico and Lewis J. Gomez. And then they did an episode that. Chrissy Mayer was on. Wait, was Chrissy on that one?
Starting point is 00:51:20 Maybe the one we were making fun I've had Chrissy Mayer on it now that I think about it. So they did an episode where, well, I'll let Lewis to explain it because I really thought that he forgot about this, but he remembers it very well.
Starting point is 00:51:32 No, yeah, no, I think they're good, but they wouldn't, they wouldn't trash me on the show. So then I, um, I did a bit with, it was with Shane Gillis. I remember this specifically because this is one of the episodes that I had to pull down when Shane was dealing with the, um, SNL thing. But we had, we had it like an intern or a girl that was working as an office manager or something and we used her and we put a black bag over her head and we had the gun in the office. The same one we put in your butt initially, Jay. And we put it was Carl's girlfriend. And we kept on taking turns gang raping her in the bathroom. It was the whole bit throughout the whole show. She was like just struggling and be like, you don't want to fuck with us. You don't want to talk about us. Well, we're going to rape your girlfriend over and over again. We pissed the whip her. And you had to take that down? How to take that down. I love to remember that episode.
Starting point is 00:52:20 It was very funny. They were repeatedly essaying my girlfriend at the time. She had it coming. She did. What did she do and messed up with me anyway? I didn't realize that Shane Gillis was on that. That's before I knew who Shane Gillis was. That's pretty incredible.
Starting point is 00:52:37 I wish that episode still existed. I'd go back and watch it again. This clip right here has a really good drop in it. So that was my history of call. Go back to the history, please. Classic Carl. Classic Carl. Perfect.
Starting point is 00:52:54 Someday we'll have that on the board and not even know that it would actually, they were talking about me. I'll just think somebody said, classic Carl. So then they finally get to the, all right, after they go through the whole origin, then Suttering John reacted to this, and then Shulie got involved, and John did that, and they finally summarize it. Basically, everything happened because John has no sense of humor and became irate at everything. That is enough for a beginner to learn how. began. There you go. That's beautiful. That was legitimately very helpful for coming from a
Starting point is 00:53:22 beginner who didn't understand it. I feel like I now have a good understanding of the basics. I'm not saying I can teach it. I would I would watch that documentary. I would spend in my hotel this weekend if somebody had the origin of the dabblerverse, like for sure it exists. Sheet Shitterson is the man who's created the documentary that you need to watch because there's now two parts of it. But part one is. fantastic. We're trying to understand what the dabbled verses and how it came about. And so I like that Jay's just like, I'm sure there's
Starting point is 00:53:53 a documentary about it. It has to be out there because again, Ray DeVito gets brought up. The whole, like the actual documentary. 100%. There's a YouTube video for sure. Maybe. Someone has made it for sure. But they have like full documentaries on Ray DeVito himself. It's a, like, seven hours long. They're crazy. Well, it's so funny, like all of these people, I know all of these people.
Starting point is 00:54:13 It's like, yeah. Somebody's like, there has to be documentary. There's talking about Ray DeVito of all people. So, of course, there is. So they realize that as they're going through and talking about all this, that, you know, maybe they're entering the dabover is here. I'm going to say maybe this is actually happening. I just can't bring myself to it. I just don't care.
Starting point is 00:54:33 People are like, oh, dude, this guy sucks. You don't think this guy sucks. And I'm like, sure, maybe. I don't care. There's a lot of people who stink. And, by the way, there's a lot of people who stink way worse than a lot of it. I mean, I don't know about Suttering John. He seems pretty low on the list.
Starting point is 00:54:48 Is common stand-up? Have you seen a stand-up before? No, I haven't. Does it exist online? Dude, we're going to become the doubt. We're dabbling. I don't want to be dabbling this hard, Jay. I just learned.
Starting point is 00:54:58 I just took the for retards test. I don't think I'm ready to dabble. Are we considered doubt? I thought the dabble means that you dabble in comedy. Oh, no, we're not. We're dabbling in the dabble versed. We're dabble versing. Yes.
Starting point is 00:55:09 The devil versing right now. You don't enter the dabble verse. The dabal verse enters you. Forrestle. Forksfully, without permission. All right, well, here's the big question, and I'm going to ask our audience to definitely reach out to Louis J. Gomez. It was a big enough of a, if our, how about this, our fans, Skanks fans, not fucking Dabbleverse fans. If you want to see Stuttering John versus Chad Zumachan, let us know.
Starting point is 00:55:38 Is there a path to that? Sure. Oh, sure. There's always a path. I like Chad. I'm on Team C. I'm on Team C. You're on Team C.
Starting point is 00:55:47 You'd want to see it. Yeah. I think that certain and John said they'd have to make me a financial offer. And that's, I guess I'd root for a crazy, dude. I guess I'd root for Chad because I know Chad. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:01 They all agree they'd root for Chad over John. I think that's a pretty good bet. Those two actually did fight. My money's on Chad. Yeah. For winning, yes. I think Chad would probably win. As far as who I want to win,
Starting point is 00:56:14 I want them to like end of Rocky three both punch and knock each other out at the same in the same go. That'd be amazing. I don't think that either of them could connect hard enough to knock anyone out. But they're so drunk.
Starting point is 00:56:29 They're just one punch and they're out. Yeah. I have a feeling that we have a new show that's entered into the dabbleverse. Do you have, yeah, see if you can find Suttering John versus Crazy Gabby. We're dabbling, dude. We're sitting.
Starting point is 00:56:43 This is just. Is a Friday night hang? You know what, Friday night hang could just be a Dabover show. Yes. This is where we get into it. And Gino and Kevin Brennan. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:55 See how fun it is, guys? You pierce the veil. Join us. Yeah. Join us. First one's free. So I love that. And thank you to Cardiff for sending that over to me today so that I could check that out.
Starting point is 00:57:10 Much appreciated. You'll know they're part of the Dabalverse when Cardiff starts showing up. on their show. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's the real. That's when you're out, you know, you point a past the point of no return. There's no escape velocity that'll get you out of this situation. Tim, have you been paying any attention to Whitney Cummings? I have not. She has been having these weird meltdowns. She, she performed at Riyadh, comedy festival, got a lot of pushback from that. A lot of her fans were not happy, but who don't like her, weren't happy.
Starting point is 00:57:44 They were racist. But it turns out they're all racist, so it's their problem, not hers. And then she got into this thing where people were noticing how many views her podcast is getting millions each episode. And so they were speculating that she was buying views. And then she came out and said, hey, guess what we're doing? We're buying views. So we're like, oh, okay. We showed you.
Starting point is 00:58:03 Yeah. Big idiots. That's what everybody thought, actually. So, yeah, that's cool. Well, now she's having more issues. And she's always has these problems with people. in the comments and you'll notice that there's very few comments underneath her videos compared to the number of views.
Starting point is 00:58:21 And she explained this by saying, oh, we have a bunch of words that are auto blocked so that you can't comment certain things. And too lazy to try who has a great YouTube channel was going through some of the things that Whitney's been up to, especially on social media lately. But this is interesting. She also always argues with people in the comments now and blocks them if they're too mean. Like on Instagram recently, she went over words. She auto blocks.
Starting point is 00:58:47 And the list was hilarious. I guess you can't comment old, ugly, busted, Botox, an old. Okay. So I was like, this is fascinating. She listed. She listed the words that are auto blocked in her comment section. So I went to her Instagram to find this video. The two ways to try was pointing out.
Starting point is 00:59:07 So if you want to be a woman on the internet. Okay, I have to stop it right there. What a fucking asshole. She takes zero responsibility for the fact that people are hating on her. It just happens to all women on the internet. If you want to be a woman on the internet, here are the things you have to do. Yeah. It has nothing to do with that.
Starting point is 00:59:23 There's a lot of women that people love. Everything she says sounds like this whenever she's defending herself. Yep. It's not me. It's just like being a woman. It's always wrapped up in some sort of victimization. Yeah. Right.
Starting point is 00:59:36 This happened upon her. She didn't do anything to put herself in a situation where people would be annoyed with her. Yeah. No, it's not about her hypocrisy or the fact that she's buying views and it's super obvious because there's 2.1 million views of a podcast episode that she has. And when she's on Joe Rogan, it has 600,000 views. You're like, wait a second. Why the fuck would that be? You do need to auto block words that filter out certain comments.
Starting point is 01:00:02 I feel like not have people talking about this. People talk about all these negative comments and negative comments. You've got to auto block words. The funny thing is, if you go to her comments section, there's so many negative comments. comments anyway. Yeah. Even with this. I don't know how many they're suppressing with these words, but that's, uh, it's not really
Starting point is 01:00:19 working. Here is my list of words that I had to auto law. Okay. So, uh, this is great because you have, uh, busted. It's one of the words that a fencer unfuckable. Is it a word that offense are unfuckable? Botox. Botox.
Starting point is 01:00:37 Notting. Shrill. Cougars in there. The word old, hack. Why would you let everyone know what offends you? Slot and old are in there and ugly? I want to find a post that combines all these words like this old unfuckable horror is too ugly and busted with all this Botox in her shrill-ass voice. Her small tits, I wouldn't even let her suck my dick, even though she's a cougar,
Starting point is 01:01:05 uh, I think an annoying cougar bitch slut. I think you nailed it. Yeah. It's actually the perfect comment. This is the most offensive thing you can say to Whitney Cummings. Cougar? What's wrong with Cougar? She doesn't want to be seen as an old woman.
Starting point is 01:01:24 No, she doesn't want people to think she works for an industrial smoothing company. Being a woman rules, there's also some memes that I've had to autobiog. So again, she has to reiterate. It's just because I'm a woman, guys. And doesn't it suck that I have to be a woman on the internet? I can't just be like a guy who just has everything handed to them? You gotta auto block words. Here is my list of words that I had to auto block.
Starting point is 01:01:49 Being a woman rules, there's also some names that I've had to auto block because losers try to like drag me into their drama and I'm like not trying to participate. So there's some other specific. I wonder if Kevin Brennan is one of those names that she had a auto block did not get dragged into drama. With ones, you might have your own specific ones. I'm telling you, block comments. It will change your life. Can't you just turn comments off entirely? You could.
Starting point is 01:02:15 That's not a great look either, but I like that she goes. Or not engage. Yeah, just not engage. Don't look at them. That's the thing. That's what was so interesting about the two ways to try thing, where he's showing evidence that she's going in and responding to specific comments. Like our social media manager and you film your little deals and you send them to them and they post them and you never actually even look at the account.
Starting point is 01:02:34 So this is an example from this Two Aways to Try video. He's showing the comments where someone goes. Her producers and PR team are not her friends allowing. this rant to air. And this is the rant that we played on WTP a couple weeks ago. And then someone responds to that. Narcissists tend to get rid of anybody who will tell them when they're going off the rails. And then Whitney responds to that and says, where's the lie, though?
Starting point is 01:02:58 I mean, what are you doing when you're going to defend yourself to one person at a time on the internet? She's the same woman who's going, rather than put a snarky comment, DM me. You want DMs from individual people telling you that you suck? That's a horrible idea. Okay. If you want to really fucking show me what it is, you'll send a self-addressed stamped envelope to. Whitney Cummings, P-O. Box 63671, L.A., California. And I will handwrite you a letter back calling you a dumb bitch.
Starting point is 01:03:30 So the latest controversy with Whitney, she's stepped in it again, this time on social media. She's decided to make Miss Rachel her target. She thought this was going to be an easy one. Yeah. She thought she'd be able to score some points going after this baby entertainer, Toddler, entertainer, Miss Rachel,
Starting point is 01:03:48 who I only know about Miss Rachel, because Howard Stern did a whole fucking bit about Miss Rachel, because he's a granddad. And so his grandson or granddaughter is being entertained in the car by Miss Rachel, who just does a dumb kid show. And so Whitney came out and was calling out Miss Rachel and everyone's like, fuck you. It's so funny.
Starting point is 01:04:10 Whitney just had a baby. So she's like a new mom. And so she's now experiencing this programming for toddlers, and she doesn't realize that all the other moms are passionate about this person. Doesn't she bring up being a new mom in her defense over and over? How could she possibly know? She's new with this. She's a new mom.
Starting point is 01:04:27 So this is the most recent TikTok video she dropped to try to smooth things over with everyone. Apologies for being in the car, but the last video I made addressing the Miss Rachel situation, I think the audio might have dropped out. Some people said it did. Apologies. I'll try this again. So regarding a video I made about Miss Rachel, I'm just going to own it.
Starting point is 01:04:52 I did not know that she was specifically for neurodivergent children. She's not, by the way. No. She's like, oh, I didn't realize that it's just for the slow kids. I don't have a slow kid. So maybe parents are slow kids like this woman. She's for the kids who have Nickelodeon or whatever. She's on.
Starting point is 01:05:09 I think she's just online Inoffensive kid content The comments on here are fantastic This is her TikTok And someone posts a gif that just says Cunt That's not on her list That's true
Starting point is 01:05:25 Angela says Says here you're a little bitch Winnie the Pooh reading that I love the who is Whitney Cummings That's my favorite kind of comment And with these people is just be like What are you talking about? like what is this situation?
Starting point is 01:05:40 I haven't heard anything about this. This is the first time I'm hearing of you. Why are you famous? And it really pisses people off. People hate that. This is a great one. It's just a stick figure holding a brain that says, please use it, bitch,
Starting point is 01:05:53 handing over the brain to her. Who even are you? Yeah, there's a lot of that. All right, let's get back to her. Are you L-O-L-L question? Yeah. Let's get back to Whitney's explanation for this. I'm sure won't piss off even more people.
Starting point is 01:06:09 People are saying she's not specifically. A lot of people are saying she is. It doesn't matter. I should have known more about Ms. Rachel. And the way that, you know, she speaks in her videos, it does overwhelm my son, but maybe he's just not old enough. You know, that's all I'm going to say. You know, he struggles with people being in his face really loud. And sometimes when you...
Starting point is 01:06:37 She, I wonder who's doing that to him. him. He's probably terrified of that fucking six head she's got going on. She looks like she's about to get picked up by the closer cameras of the third kind aliens. She's so obnoxious. She's like, my son doesn't like obnoxious people. Yeah. It sucks for him. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:55 He's doomed. Go to the dentist or take them somewhere. People are like really loud and children's faces and like a moat. She gets into his face when she's She's literally getting into the face of the camera. camera. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:10 Psycho. The way that might be overwhelming for some, might be super comforting for other children. So I'm navigating him and what he reacts to, and I only have the experience of raising my son. So I'm sorry if it wasn't the same experience that you guys have had with Ms. Rachel. And I'm sure that maybe when he gets a little bit older, he's going to be obsessed with her. Maybe I just showed it to him a little bit too young. I made videos before about other children's. icons. It didn't, it didn't, they haven't gone this poorly, uh, like Winnie the Pooh, you know,
Starting point is 01:07:46 not wearing pants, you know, it's always. Yeah, that's totally comparable. Hold on a second. Her hot take is that Winnie the Pooh doesn't wear pants. It's like the Donald Duck argument. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a bear. Right. Bears actually don't wear pants. He doesn't have a, he doesn't have a weiner hanging out. Right. The weird thing is the shirt. Yeah. Fucking idiots. But I like that her, her, her defy her defy, her defyance. her apology includes the why aren't you mad at me for the other things I've said about children entertainment
Starting point is 01:08:14 and I'll give this to her I don't think she's being performative I think she's like this all the fucking time yeah yeah she's so defensive everything's a backhanded apology right she's right she's missing the point and again just like when she goes oh I realize why you guys are criticizing me for Riyadh
Starting point is 01:08:29 it's because you're racist yeah exactly well that's not gonna cool people down so to be on here and just be like oh you guys don't like what I said about Miss Rachel well Winnie the Poo sucks balls Why come no one's coming at me for that? They're like, I'll put this fire out with gas. Something that I don't know how to explain to my son.
Starting point is 01:08:48 And then in the audiobooks and on the, um, the tuny, there's the story where everyone's playing with his bottom. And I'm like, I feel like we could cut that, you know, so I'm just navigating. She's working out material now for us. It sounds like. Being a new parent and a comedian. And I realize that a lot of these, uh, you know, you know, children's heroes are such a big deal. And I'm sure to us,
Starting point is 01:09:12 since we're so emotionally attached to them. And I realize if, you know, if someone, you know, made fun of Thomas the Train, I'm sure I would be just as pissed as you guys are. We're going to fucking get in Thomas the Train's face, but, bitch. That's my thing. All right.
Starting point is 01:09:27 As the autism spectrum kids, that's who Thomas is. Hold on. You're triggered. You're triggered. I think she's pro Thomas the Trade on this one. It better be or I'm going to be commenting. Who are you?
Starting point is 01:09:37 Who is? You with Hay. Who was Rudy Cummins? I'll show her. I'm going to get her. Also, that list of words, you could just misspell them slightly. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:48 I just realized how easy it is to form the exact sentence that tab just came up with. Cunt with a K. Yeah, just put numbers in there. Fair. When it comes to our kids, it's a totally different. Oh, my God. Oh, look who's standing outside her car.
Starting point is 01:10:06 It's her fiance. Chris Cole, professional skateboarder who also is being accused of beating his ex-wife. She just went. Yeah, there's a little creepy like, oh shit. I'm sorry, Eddie. Don't hurt me. Excuse me.
Starting point is 01:10:22 It's a totally different thing. And I'm navigating it not well at the moment. I hate this navigating. I'm a comedian and a new mom. I'm just trying to navigate that. Yeah, I'm lost on this journey. Yeah, it's like, okay, so people got offended. because you made fun of Miss Rachel.
Starting point is 01:10:38 So what? They're not your fans. Move on. Who gives a shit? Yeah. Do you want fans of your comedy who get offended about you making fun of Miss Rachel? That wouldn't be a fun of stand-up show. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:49 What audience do you want? Apparently everyone. Yeah. Well, you can't have everyone. So, like, cultivate the audience that also thinks Miss Rachel's tacky or whatever and move on. Yeah, or ignore it and move on. But it would have been way better. She doubled down and went, fuck Miss Rachel.
Starting point is 01:11:04 I don't know why you guys like Miss Rachel. She blows. been way funnier. Hashtag team Thomas. All right. Another of your propaganda about Thomas the train. Every time you're on the show. And I did not know about all the deeper,
Starting point is 01:11:23 it became about Palestine and Israel and all these other things. I didn't know that I was stepping. Would you be not paid attention to the news? Like that's all anyone's talking about with Ms. Rachel right now. She might be in anti-Semites. Really not a time to kind of jump into a big fucking internet backlash. Like, read the room. Where is this apology going?
Starting point is 01:11:44 That's a great question. I thought maybe she wasn't aware of any of that. And now she is aware of that. And she's like, this is getting so much worse. Yeah, I know. That's how it goes. Wow. This is her second attempt at it.
Starting point is 01:11:57 You hear her out of the start. She's like, I don't know if the audio works on the first one. She's rehearsed this and it's going this poorly. She's like, if I filibuster, I don't have to talk to my boyfriend outside of the car. Maybe he'll calm down by the time I unlock the doors and he won't hit me. He also, he's a Miss Rachel fan, it turns out. And I should have known that I was. And I should have done more research.
Starting point is 01:12:24 I should have known more about her. I should have known more about the situation. It was unnecessary to post, frankly. And it's a really scary time as well. right now. Tendents are high. What's going on in the world is terrifying. Especially if you're a woman, right?
Starting point is 01:12:48 Trump's America. You know, I apologize if I added any stress to anybody's day or maybe being mad at me was a nice diversion from being mad at what else is going on. She just undid everything. If that was supposed to be an apology, well, I guess being mad at me is what you got you through your little fucking day. Now, isn't it? It's like, fuck you.
Starting point is 01:13:11 What a bitch. I compared her to Aaron Embo before, but that sounds like someone he would fucking say. Right. Yeah. So you're seething. You feel better? Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, so I sent some revenge porn to a buddy to get back in a ex-girlfriend.
Starting point is 01:13:24 Oh, I'm so sorry. I pissed you off about Miss Rachel. You're welcome. Yeah, right. What? In this country. So thanks for listening. Thanks for your patience.
Starting point is 01:13:38 And I'm a little insecure that this video is not funny, but I'm really going to just try to not. Why? None of your other videos are funny. I was going to say she's insecure about things that aren't funny? Holy shit, that's a lot of insecurity. Jokes around, around these, the sacred person that I obviously need to learn more about. Oh, Whitney. Wow.
Starting point is 01:14:01 Apparently, you guys think she's really important. I shouldn't be making fun of Ms. Rachel, according to the internet. That's what she's. saying. I tell jokes about my cunt. So really, who's the more important influencer here? The one trying to help your kids, or me? A
Starting point is 01:14:20 30s woman who spent her 20s talking about getting railed in the back seats of cabs and other fucking random places and about how nasty my pussy was. Yes, that's what I thought. Aha. Well, that certainly doesn't make your vagina sound very appealing.
Starting point is 01:14:36 New mom. I'm going to start navigating things a little bit differently when it comes to children's heroes. Got it. Thanks for listening. And oh, God, this is almost four minutes. Sorry. What a horrible decision that was. Here's my recommendation on navigating life as being a new mom.
Starting point is 01:14:58 Put the phone down. Yeah. Be a mom. Raise you kids. Right. Do your fucking comedy shows. Don't be a woman on the internet. Not fucking around with your phone.
Starting point is 01:15:08 Well, she obviously could use some good PR, could use some good press, wants to be out there in the mainstream. She's buying those views to make it look like she's out there in the mainstream. And maybe Comedy Central execs are paying attention because she this week hosted the Daily Show. She was a guest host on the Daily Show. And she did this whole bit about how we shouldn't judge the Democratic candidates for president coming up in 2020. too harshly. And so, uh,
Starting point is 01:15:41 let's see how she does with this little monologue. But I am a liberal. Okay. How do you not remember this? I had blue hair for like a year. And that was, that was mostly to try to get my dead dad. Bitch.
Starting point is 01:15:53 It's true. You did have blue hair right now. Yeah. You just can't tell because I have a blue halo. Um, listen to her make this all about her. Now, I love John Stewart.
Starting point is 01:16:03 I thought he was great on the show. I used to watch it all the time. John Stewart never made the job. jokes about John Stewart. He just made witty political jokes. And I'm not saying that Whitney wrote all of this. There probably is a staff that helped contribute, but I can tell what Whitney wrote.
Starting point is 01:16:18 Does she have a tie on that matches your shirt perfectly? Yes. You've never been. Wow. I know. She can't get out of her own way with the way she dresses. But I am a liberal. Okay.
Starting point is 01:16:29 How do you not remember this? I had blue hair for like a year. And that was mostly to try to get my dad's attention, but I still couldn't go near a bookstore without people. asking me to help them find Lena Dunham's biography. That's a terrible joke. Yeah, it's trying to be like a self-deprecating humor, but it's not. Right. I blue hair.
Starting point is 01:16:50 So if I was near a bookstore, people would ask me where to find Lena Dunham's biography. Because she's also very liberal. Got it. Cool. Okay. I got assaulted in a Waterburger because I have blue hair and they assumed that I was a liberal. Good. You deserve that tab. I hope you learned. That was the way my year started. 2.30 in the morning on New Year's Eve, getting assaulted in a Waddeburger. What is happening? I mean,
Starting point is 01:17:13 you don't need a Waddeburger at 2.30 a.m. the first couple hours of the year, do you? Yeah. I had just finished a loadout. I was starving. Oh, okay. Fair enough. Yeah. All right. So, she's making this all about her and continuing on with that. And of course, the whole reason for this because she's caught some flack from the left for when she went on CNN New Year's Eve a couple years ago. and had some base takes on things. And so people were just like, whoa, is she going like Joe Rogan, right wing on us? Is that what she's trying to do? So she comes out, she's like, by the way, I'm super liberal, right?
Starting point is 01:17:49 And just so you guys know. And then the jokes, again, are about her. But I just want to give you a little heads up. And in 2028, we're going to have some candidates for president, and they're not going to be perfect. They're going to make some mistakes. They're going to make mistakes in speeches. They're going to make mistakes on social media. I've never done that before.
Starting point is 01:18:06 but I've heard it can get pretty bad Ugh So this is Whitney Going into the Daily Show Which is like an institution And thinking it's the Whitney show Like they're all going to be like Oh yeah
Starting point is 01:18:18 Do you see what happened with her on social media this week This is just an extension of her apology video I mean It's crazy that she thinks that everyone's gonna be like Oh yeah Whitney's really known for fucking up on social media Yeah Yeah that How much of the the audience of the daily show
Starting point is 01:18:33 Is watching Whitney Cummings TikToks and being like, oh, she's in a controversy. Zero percent, which is why she got no reaction from that joke. And also, she doesn't understand that there's a whole world outside of her little worldview. Yeah. What are we going to say, Deb? I was going to say it looks like she's wearing her dad's shirt just like Kevin Smith, you know. It does not fit her.
Starting point is 01:18:57 That's for sure. All right. So she's going to get into the different candidates that might be running for president. and Cory Booker is the first one she brings up. None of them are the dream candidate. They're all going to have issues that you're going to have to deal with. Like Cory Booker, I know he's not very exciting, but he gets the job done. He's like the sketchers of candidates.
Starting point is 01:19:21 Not a good joke. I think she wrote that one. Yeah, I would say so. He gets the job done, like the sketches of candidates. That might have been funny in like 2008 when Skechers were popular. Yeah. The popular is stuttering John. That's true. That's a great reason not to reference it.
Starting point is 01:19:42 Yeah. The antithesis of what is interesting and hip. We talked about veganism a lot in the first part of the episode today. But he does have a big problem. If Cory Booker became president, America would have its first vegan president. I love making a good fruit shape, you know, throwing a bunch of different
Starting point is 01:20:02 fruits in a blender, banana. I would love show you a great vegan meal. No thanks. It's hard to imagine a vegan president. I agree. Comes off a little weak. You don't want our president in the situation room. Like, hey, before we attack,
Starting point is 01:20:18 are these muffins made with coconut butter? That's the most hack vegan joke. Yeah. That's brutal. Yeah. I would talk about something like demoralizing, like Putin's over there eating this giant grass-fed ribeye and you're having your sad satan.
Starting point is 01:20:36 Yeah. Is that way you want to look at a world leader? That would be better than the situation room. Before we make any decisions, I have to have a snack. That's what vegans are always saying. That's what women are always saying. That's probably more women are always saying. Oh, yeah, we're going to buy my Iran and then I'm going to get a little treat.
Starting point is 01:20:52 And then we're going to Duncan. Who wants to go with me? Let's all pile into the limo. We're going to Duncan. So I love this because she flubs this set up hard. You know what, though? It is not precedent. You know what?
Starting point is 01:21:06 It's not unprecedented. Oops. She's talking about presidents and unprecedented. I can see where you flubbed that a little bit. J.B. Pritzker, oh, watch out. Everyone's getting roasted on this monologue. None of these people are going to be perfect. Like this guy, Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker,
Starting point is 01:21:26 you might not recognize him unless you've maybe run into him at a spirit Halloween. Governor J.B. Pritzker and the first lady celebrated Halloween dressed as Shrek and Fiona. Governor J.B. Pritzker dressed up as a convincing Professor Dumbledore. Light saber in hand got under the Star Wars spirit for the unofficial May the fourth holiday. May the fourth be with you. Okay. We cannot let Vladimir Putin see any of this footage. None of these candidates are perfect.
Starting point is 01:21:53 Stop holding out for another Obama. So that was the punchline. The punchline with J.B. Pritzker is that he's 10 pounds of shit in a five-pound sack. That would be better. I think that she thought the clips of him dressed up in costumes was funny enough that you didn't have to have a punchline after that. Could you imagine if Putin saw this? And what would happen then? Here's a great punchline.
Starting point is 01:22:16 Who is he? Trudeau? Come on. You know, because he was a drama guy. I don't know. Trying to think of who does he think he is. He's a fat bastard. I hate Jamie Pritzker.
Starting point is 01:22:28 I'm too close to Illinois. Fair enough. Maybe that one was too close to home for you. So then they get into Josh Shapiro is the next one who's going to get roasted. And this is the laziest joke writing you'll hear. If you can look past that, I will look past my own personal problem with him that I just can't really picture us having a president named Josh. You know what I think Josh, I think like guy with three jugs of protein powder who lectures you on a first date about how monogamy is not natural. But we can get through this.
Starting point is 01:23:02 We can get through the name Josh. Vice President is named J.D. Like, if Josh is the guy at the frat who's pledging, JD is the senior who's branding Fy Singh on Josh's nuts. Thanks a lot, Carl. I love the people who are just like, how about those people named Frank? Am I right? I mean, you think about it, Frank.
Starting point is 01:23:23 You're like, what's this guy waiting in line for a taco? What? What does any of that mean? I can't believe the pop that guy. It's so stupid. It's the lazyest writing. A pop because she said the word nuts. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:35 Yeah. It doesn't think much for this audience as long as it goes along with their worldview because she brings up AOC and this gets an applause break. But there's no perfect names here. There's AOC. I mean, she doesn't even have a name. She doesn't even have a name. But it does rub some people the wrong way that she goes by a three-letter acronym.
Starting point is 01:23:58 So that's wild. She's just doing the setup. There's AOC and people start applauding that. And I want to say right now, I hope she'd be. becomes the Democratic nominee for the 2020 presidential run. They'd be fucking awesome. It would be awesome. I would love for AOC to be in the spotlight and be on these debates and stuff.
Starting point is 01:24:16 That'd be fun to watch. But these people love it. They're all excited about it. So let's see what jokes she was coming up with for the three-letter acronym. But it does rub some people the wrong way that she goes by a three-letter acronym. You know, like she's in the company of luminaries like MLK, FDR, and DMX. but focus on the good things, focus on the fact that she was elected at 29 years old.
Starting point is 01:24:42 At 29? You were doing at 29. At 29, I elected to get a nose ring. That had changed the world? No, but it did keep a lot of stable, responsible men from dating me, and they went on to do great things because of it. She wrote that one.
Starting point is 01:25:04 Again, makes it about herself. That is some real self-loathing on display. It's so lame, too. When I was wondering, I got a nose ring. Cool. I can't roll my eyes hard enough at these jokes. Also, the DMX thing, is DMX relevant? Where did that come from?
Starting point is 01:25:18 I don't know. I was wondering about that. It seemed dated to me. Tom Myers wrote that one. It's brutal. All right. Tom Myers is calling her up like, hey, I've got some suggestions on your jokes.
Starting point is 01:25:30 I saw you on the daily show. You want to shorten the setup a little? So then Gavin Newsom's the next one to really get it. Gavin Newsome. You might be surprised that he's running for president because based on how he's traveling, he already seems to think he has the job. Gavin Newsom. The California governor dashed off to New Hampshire and Nevada. Governor Newsom, he toured some small towns in South Carolina. California Governor Gavin Newsom took the fight to Texas this weekend, furnishing his foreign policy credentials in Davos. Jetting down to Brazil. California's governor Gavin Newsom,
Starting point is 01:26:05 guess where he was? He went to China and sat down with the president Xi Jinping. To be fair, the only reason he was sitting down with the Jijing Ping, but to try and book him for his podcast. I can't wait for him to tell Jijing Ping that, hey, America won't back down. Also ask him, do you mind just looking into the camera and say sponsored by Bluchu? Wow. Yeah. Wow. That was ponderous.
Starting point is 01:26:32 He's going to, so book him for his podcast. That was a long way to go. That was a big clip package to get to just the last thing, acknowledging that. that and then saying book him for his podcast. But then the boner pill joke, that's what those things are just like, if I say blue chew, that'll get a response from people. What? Whoa, Viagra.
Starting point is 01:26:51 Ha, ha, ha. Yeah, that's great. So then more on Gavin Newsom, this joke bombs because it's critical of a Democrat. And you cannot do that on the daily show. People do not like that. I don't care for that. But look, Gavin also, he does unite both sides. Liberals likes him because he's mean to Trump
Starting point is 01:27:12 and conservatives like him because he let Los Angeles burn down. And that means something. Okay. Do you hear that reaction? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Ironically, that was the only one that I thought was like almost, almost smile worthy.
Starting point is 01:27:30 Yeah. And people hated that. Yeah. So it shows you the kind of audience here in front of there. Talk about Miss Rachel. Isn't she a bitch? Last joke I have on here. What I guess I'm trying to say, America, is that we're not a young country anymore, okay? Look at our bridges.
Starting point is 01:27:51 They're sagging. Lakes, they're drying up. We're drying up, okay? We can't just pick apart every candidate and think that everything's going to magically work out. This is the real world, not Nancy Pelosi's stock portfolio. No one candidate is going to check all the boxes for us. And if you keep holding out for Mr. Wright, We're going to end up with Mr. Altright.
Starting point is 01:28:16 So maybe we all just stop approaching politicians like we're looking for a soulmate and approach them like we're on Grindr. You know you're going to get hard, but you still want to be able to walk home. I didn't get that at all. So I think, again, this is like chat GPT writing jokes for it. It's just like, all right, what's going to be some outrageous things to say? Blue Chew, Grindr. it's almost like the word is the most important thing in there.
Starting point is 01:28:50 You got to approach the candidate like you would a guy on Grindr. That's a gay dating app. It's a very niche audience you're talking to here. Yeah. But Grindr was probably like ranked in Chanch Ept as funnier than Tinder. Of course it is. It's always funnier for a joke. But I didn't understand that be able to walk home afterwards thing.
Starting point is 01:29:08 Like none of that made sense. None of it can I. Well, you know, if you fuck a girl hard enough, her hips don't line up right and she has to go to the hospital. I've done that. But I don't know a lot of guys. I don't know why you guys are pulled that off. Do you guys
Starting point is 01:29:20 want to look at the comments underneath this video? Yes. I believe. Fingers crossed, who is this? So this is, this was posted.
Starting point is 01:29:31 Did John Stewart get a sex change? This was posted by, oh, God, what I just lost it. This was posted by the Daily Show. That's a jump scare. And sorry about that.
Starting point is 01:29:43 And the Daily Show YouTube has 13.5 million subscribers, pretty big channel, and 305,000 views, 3,000 comments on here. Isn't this the woman who has been crashing out saying Ms. Rachel is evil? There's 1,700 thumbs up on that 58 replies. The Saudi money did not last long. Isn't this the opposite of every John Stewart monologue? Yes, yes.
Starting point is 01:30:09 The best thing about this video is how everyone in the comments is on the same page. Didn't she call Kid to enjoy Miss Rachel deaf morons? Wow Highly came for the comments. Isn't this the comic we got mad at Miss Rachel
Starting point is 01:30:22 for saying you shouldn't block medical aid to children? Guys, this ain't it. I don't like to I'm going on this. Daily show blink twice if her publicist
Starting point is 01:30:34 is holding you hostage. These are great. Anyway. I've never seen this before. Celebrity sitting on a mountain money telling voters not to demand change. I came for the comments. Yeah, it's great.
Starting point is 01:30:51 That comes up a lot. The amount of hatred that she's getting on her videos on her own channel, but that everywhere else she goes to. And by the way, you can't block those words, which she shows up on other people's channels. She could do the Maddox thing and be like, all right, here's the list of words, Daily Show. You must mute these from the thread.
Starting point is 01:31:07 Yeah, I wonder, like Joe Rogan and stuff, does she present a list of words? words to auto block because that's going to get a lot of comments on YouTube. Yeah. I wonder if she's in there responding to the Joe Rogan interview comments as well. Oh, that's the thing to go digging into that YouTube comments and see if she's replied to anyone. Because you know she's spending way too much time looking at that stuff.
Starting point is 01:31:31 Yeah, obsessing about how people feel about her and she's just making it worse and worse. Here's a guy who doesn't care what people think of them. Sturgeoning John in a very special episode, presenting a new character for us to enjoy. on Thursday's The Stuttering John podcast. And he's going to set this up for us and let us know we've got a good one coming up. It should be a very special show. You know, we might get a visit from a guest.
Starting point is 01:32:21 You never know. I mean, you never know, right? So on the scroll, I haven't seen this in a while. He's got Venmo me at John Melendez-Five. I don't know. I just like, just give me money. Why? You know, what's funny is I listen to the show on, on like 1.3 times speed.
Starting point is 01:32:40 And so he sounds slurry and drunk at 1.3 times speed. And then I come on the show and I'm stuck in real time. And I'm just like, oh, God, this is not good. Yeah. I've been letting this run. I just paused it now, but I was letting this run the whole time. He's just kind of looking around. This is how the show starts, too.
Starting point is 01:32:59 looking around and then he says this. No need for the, no need for the ticker. I don't like any of you fucking cheap fucks are going to pay me. Pay for what? He's got his Venmo up there and he's like, I'm just going to take that down. You cheap fucks. How many people
Starting point is 01:33:17 do you give VDMO money to that you're looking at on YouTube, John? Right. This is like when I get home, you know, after going out with friends and having too many beers and I come into the kitchen, I'm like, where's that fucking frown pizza? You fucking cats, you're eating all the fucking food in the house, you know, just like stumbling around. And I got to, I don't know what time of day this is, but I got to imagine this is the beginning of his day.
Starting point is 01:33:39 Yeah. Yeah. Now, Deb, when you do that, do you turn on your webcam and start streaming to whatever social media platform you can find? No. Oh, okay. It's probably smart. It's probably a good move. I mean, I do watch it.
Starting point is 01:33:52 Welcome to cooking and frozen pizza after the bar. Please, memo me at John Melendez. V2-52-56. So he wakes up and he's got all these fucking Venmo payments. Like, what the hell? All right, so just this week, John sent Miss Judy the link. And Miss Judy came back on the show again, which we were all a little surprised about
Starting point is 01:34:17 because Miss Judy was on Point-Dabblepoint with us on Monday, on Shui's channel over on Rumble. And so then Miss Judy goes on Bob Levy's show, Levyverse, which Bob's all the way back. Yeah. I've been texting with him a bunch this week. He's back on MLC.
Starting point is 01:34:33 I'm excited about that. I think him and Kevin was the best iteration of that show, those two beating up on Chad Zumach together. But John watches Judy talking about this on Bob's show, and John is not happy. I was like, man, I'm so tired. I don't want to talk anymore, you know, but Vince convinced me to get on because his show was tanking as usual.
Starting point is 01:34:57 Was it? So my show was tanking as usual. Oh, and I have it both ways, Miss Judy. Your dwarfy counterpart realizes that I'm the son that every show revolves around, you stupid fucking fuck. Oh wow He wanted to say bitch He wanted to say crunt He wanted to
Starting point is 01:35:38 He had a bunch of things Ready to go He was up the ceiling He's like I don't know Brain went into overload With how he was gonna finish That sentence
Starting point is 01:35:48 That was amazing He did not want to be too hard And shot now His ram His ram went like really low To really high Oh God We got an AI
Starting point is 01:35:58 Generates A new ending with his sentence. All right. Well, he's going to introduce this new character. Now, I've sped this up quite a bit, but I wanted to show you guys this presentation that he had 45 minutes into the show on Thursday. Only three beers so far, right? God, I swear to God.
Starting point is 01:36:20 Man, dropped dead. So on my third beer. Good for you, John. And now. In the last 10 minutes, sir? I'll be back I'm just going to take myself off screen for a few minutes and then
Starting point is 01:36:37 we will do something fun okay so now I have it at 10x speed he's gone to completely black you know play a video or something there's a lot of things you could do so you're not just completely like if people are just tuning in on YouTube it's just a blank screen like I guess it's not on
Starting point is 01:36:55 yeah there's just nothing There's no ticker. There's nothing to make you think that anything's happening. Again, this is still at 10-neck speed. This goes on for many minutes. And now he's back. He's got a turbanon. He's got a crystal ball in front of him.
Starting point is 01:37:11 He's got to re-center his green screen. I have this at two and a half time speed because this is going on forever. He's still muted. Ted, describe what you're seeing here. He looks like he's dressed as Johnny Carson's character where he predicted the stuff. Carnac. Yeah, and he's got like a background, and he's trying to set his green screen, so he's, like, becoming more and more ghostly back and forth. Completely transparent.
Starting point is 01:37:38 They can just see his eyeballs and turning into a movie poster. He doesn't know how to do this. He can't figure it out. But the funny thing was he had it like immediately, and now he's just digging with it, and it's totally ruined. This is still a two and a half time speed. He's just fucking with it all this time. It's crazy. And you can see this.
Starting point is 01:37:56 there's like a menu and streamer where you can set all this stuff without being live. No shit. In fact, he's live and then it's up in front of that. So he probably doesn't even see the fact that he's on the screen for everyone. Oh, you might be right. Yeah, because then he goes black and
Starting point is 01:38:12 because he just took himself back off. Yeah, that checks. I bet you. I know the sound of his engines. The Duke of the Wow, this is amazingly produced. it's time for the Duke of the future
Starting point is 01:38:33 what a fucking debacle what a train wreck that was what is he so he's got he's got the turban on and then is he just wearing like a suit jacket or something I think so this took him like 25 minutes to slip into get on a hat could you imagine he was gone that long
Starting point is 01:38:51 comes back fumbles with everything for another couple of minutes doesn't think anyone could see him yeah and then finally comes in hits the wrong thing because it goes back to the escape from L.A. And then he overrides that with this new thing that someone produced for him.
Starting point is 01:39:07 It's got the AI, the Duke of the Future logo on it. And then he repeats what they just said. Yes. So he got a new toy. He's very excited about it. He plays with it like a child would in front of our very eyes. The Duke of the future will change as he looks through the globe of the future.
Starting point is 01:39:29 That's red. Now it's green, obviously. Okay, now it's purple. Now it's orange. There's the globe gold. You got like a T-moon light, and he thinks this is the greatest bit. Oh, he's loving this. He's so excited about it, and he's playing with it. Like, we can all the different colors that it could be.
Starting point is 01:39:47 I don't think he planned on having that affectation. Yeah, he changes his accent multiple times. And he even catches himself. He's like, I don't even know what accent I'm doing. I have no idea. I'm just being vaguely racist. Romani, Gypsy, who gives his shit?
Starting point is 01:40:03 This is great. So we see what the production of this show is. John is going to show images, like the whole point of this bit and it drags on forever, like all of his bits do because he kick out of his own way. But he shows a photo of someone like Vince the lawyer's the first one.
Starting point is 01:40:19 And then he looks to his crystal ball, and then he sees what's going to happen to him in the future, and then he shows the image of that. And the way he has all of this loaded up is the way that John always produces the show through his email. Watch this. So this is crazy.
Starting point is 01:40:40 He pulls up his email and we can all see it and we can see what his emails are. YouTube copyright, new copyright counter-notifications. He's got two of those. Oh, wow. That just came in that morning. He also has, um, he's got HBO Max. Yeah, Pruddy for that. That's cool.
Starting point is 01:41:01 But check that. this out. So we just watched him yell at Miss Judy on there. Not only did he have to do that on his show, he emailed her back. Look at this email right here from the Join Me on Stream Yard when he sent her the link. He writes
Starting point is 01:41:16 back, L.O.L. I need you to save my show. You're the epitome of boring. No, no, it's epitome. Epitome. You're the epitome. It's an epitome of boring. It's crazy to me that John has to reach out to Judy directly. I
Starting point is 01:41:32 saw you said a mean thing about me. Fuck you. I could look at Jod's email when he dachens himself all day long. And then you have all these emails that are from him. Oh, there's also, there's also Richard sent him, Duky's post-production. I guess that guy he was asking to fix his award show thing from two years ago. It was like somebody worked on that for him. And then he's got all these emails that are to him, which just names like LogCap and Larry,
Starting point is 01:41:57 silent Mike, Vince, so that he can go in here and do bets. Now check this out. He fucks this up. Great. Oops. So he just clicked on one. We're seeing an image. I don't know if he realizes he's sharing his screen yet.
Starting point is 01:42:15 Now he's showing image events. And he's silent during this. He's not saying anything. So this is what the future holds. So check this out. What we saw the first image he showed was going to be the payoff to this whole. That was him in the future. and then he went back and showed Vince O'Watchy realized he fucked up.
Starting point is 01:42:41 Didn't mean to do that. You were gone for so long and had all this shit ready to go. It's amazing. It's like, ah, fuck, I didn't mean to do that. Put the pictures on your on your desktop in a folder and just click through them with the arrow keys. He does not know how to save anything to his computer. He has to pull everything up through his email because you, You've used Streamyard before.
Starting point is 01:43:09 There's literally a button where you can just, like, put up an image file. Yeah. It's right there. Share my screen. I mean, you could also go in here and, you know, I can go and change my background in the middle of us recording. Look at that. That's tab in the past. You didn't have to.
Starting point is 01:43:27 Not even glass tab. Madcox. You didn't have to get up and walk away and then come back and do that. One click. Boom. Done. Incredible. I'm going to be a creepomaniac for the rest of the show.
Starting point is 01:43:37 Sounds good. Yeah. I approve. All right, so let's watch the Vince the lawyer payoff since he already fucked it up and gave it away. Let's watch how he presents this. Mr. Mbesi finally realized that he may be gay. So he dumped his wife and found happiness. with Casey Armstrong as they hang out on the beach,
Starting point is 01:44:15 holding hands and watching men nakedly grapple. Oh, my God. Grapple. He is so slow. This could be a funny bit if he had a co-host who was like, oh, what do you think is going to happen to Vince the lawyer? And then he looks at his ball and they bring up the image. I also find
Starting point is 01:44:38 I find it endlessly funny when liberals who are like we love all gay people and all this stuff they call, like their big insult is to call someone a gay person. He calls me gay. He calls Vince Gay all the time. He calls Casey gay. This is
Starting point is 01:44:54 horrible AI. So whoever made this forum, it doesn't look anything like Vince. It doesn't look like anything like KC. Armstrong. But apparently it's supposed to be them holding hands on a beach and they're watching two other men that look just like them grapple? None of this makes any sense.
Starting point is 01:45:11 And yet, it's so homophobic. What he's showing you're trying? Like, this is his big payoff. Oh, wow. You burned him good. Well, guys, it's my turn. My turn to get roasted. Now we move on. You know, to your point earlier, Tim,
Starting point is 01:45:30 when I watch John Clips, I'm typically at 2x speed when I'm watching a show because it goes on forever and ever. And actually watching it a 2x Speed is easy to understand everything that's going on. There's never a time. I'm like, wait, what did he just say? He's so slow the way he talks.
Starting point is 01:45:49 To others in the double verse. Skull! Was that number four, five, six? You are now listening to the Duke of the Luzza. Between every character. What a loser. Oh.
Starting point is 01:46:13 You know, how proud of himself he is. He thinks he's killing it. Okay. How many people, how many views does this have, like 15? So he takes it down. Immediately, I was watching the live chat was crushing him. They were clouding him so hard. But anyway, this has been clipped by, I think, Stala 19 and Doom have both clipped it.
Starting point is 01:46:35 So there are thousands and thousands of views on this shit. Oh, where do we see? Lady Kay, oh, just do it. The ball's pink because you're gay. You're such a gay goal. No, no, no, no. The reason why he goes, if they're a bad, if they're an evil person, it turns red.
Starting point is 01:47:00 He says that early on, so then he goes, Lady Kay, it changes it to red. That's his big presentation. Just do it. Just do it. There's an eternal logic. Yes, I know. of the lighten the loafers.
Starting point is 01:47:16 That's literally calling me gay. He always says just too. It's not anything about him being gay. And he goes, he's late in the loafers. Isn't that calling someone gay? Yes. Yeah. Yes, I know.
Starting point is 01:47:29 Yes. Yes. Get to it, John. Oh, no. What does this accent? Lady Kane, not a good day. What did he do? Lady Kane.
Starting point is 01:47:40 That is a cab driver. Yeah. Let me show you And I forgot it. Lady Kay In his natural habitat. My natural. In the future or now?
Starting point is 01:47:52 There is Carl Heberger. Oh, he said my name. Now, I don't know. I don't know. He hasn't said my name in a long time. I feel like since the lull suit, he really hasn't said my name, but he's back. That is a really horrific picture, Carl.
Starting point is 01:48:08 It's not great. It's not a good photo of me. I'll be honest. You never should let that be put up on the internet, no shit. That is actually the photo. That's the background photo for one of the streams of the creep off for me. Fuck you.
Starting point is 01:48:20 So I can tell the difference between the two of them. Fuck you. This nagled tooth. This is what he put on his business card. Now. It's not my business cards. That is one of me. Here's this horrible, horrific photo of me.
Starting point is 01:48:38 Would you like to hire me to do a job? That's your business card. No. I did not be anywhere near me again. Can I get in contact with you? No, please don't. Your high school pictures, the little pocket pictures you give to your girlfriend.
Starting point is 01:48:57 What? It's never been taken. Now, that is one ugly fuck. With the snaggle teeth, the fucking plaid shirt. I mean, that's the,
Starting point is 01:49:12 With the fucking little buttons. Whatever. I love this. His second go-to is my shirt is planned. Fuck. Roasting me good. He's always got five jokes immediately when he sees someone. So he gave up the accent.
Starting point is 01:49:30 You're a pretty background like you're in a Photoshop. He gave up the accent and any of this having to do with the future. Well, remember, he wants to first let you know who he's going to look into the future. Oh, okay. So that's why he's letting the audience. This is also, this is your like natural habitat. Just a blank. Natural habit with your name next to you.
Starting point is 01:49:51 That was the right. Floating next to your body. That was the right term to use. Whatever goatee to hide his fucking double chin. It wasn't working. With that stupid look of stupidity. God damn. You fucking.
Starting point is 01:50:06 You got me good. You bit stupid. Stupid. stupid stupid stupid look of stupidity all right you guys want to find out what happens to lady kay yes yeah the guy who's lighten the loafers and has a stupid plaid shirt on and we must find out what happens to lady k after these messages boom boom boom boom boom boom boom what happens to lady k
Starting point is 01:50:43 new accent I bet I can get a case of these accents here in one of the pretty close The future is not is dim for Lady Kay We'll be working on it I think the only thing dim is you And
Starting point is 01:51:01 Take your time there, John Oh my gosh The future is dim for Lady K Okay, you got it though Is it not Crystal Boy? Is he from Transylvania? Christopher
Starting point is 01:51:23 I need your help here. You're letting me down. I'm going to go to the Budweiser Brewery here, and I'm going to show them these videos and get them to send a cease and desist allowing John to drink Bush Light. Yes. This is a very bad look for their brand.
Starting point is 01:51:41 And they're like, no one even has high regard for Bush Light, but we can't allow this. No, not at all. Yeah. Came up. Jesus Christ. The future looks good for Eddie Kay. Oh, I thought it was.
Starting point is 01:51:53 It was dim. That's an empty. That is an empty. I thought it was dim, but now it was... Well, we'll do lavender for Lady Kay. Because he's gay. He's got purple because he's gay. Yeah, he just did the just do it again after he pulled up the lavender color.
Starting point is 01:52:08 I think he's saying that I'm gay. I think he is saying that you're gay. I think he might be accusing me of being gay, something that his daughter is. So is that, like, are gay people bad? Should we make fun of people who are gay? Because I'll make fun of his daughter, if that's the gay. Gaywad. The doors open.
Starting point is 01:52:26 Oh, this clip's coming out. He was going to make fun of my daughter. He did it. Well, we'll do lavender for Lady Kay. Do it. Yeah, I'm the ugly one. Go! Now, where was I?
Starting point is 01:52:44 Yeah, take your time. The future looks good for Lady Kay. Okay, cool. What do we got? He ended up purchasing a second home. That was the past. That's still the past. On the same block as a gas station right across.
Starting point is 01:53:07 Future looks good for Lady Kay. Future looks wonderful as Lady Kay can park on the lawn and hang out with homeless people. Right at the gas station next door. This is my favorite new thing that he's attacking you for, is this gas station bit? Like, I can't figure it out. The fact that Keanu goes out and laughs like,
Starting point is 01:53:42 ah, dominoes, blah. I can't figure this out. So he just showed a photo of my house, and then there was a 7-Eleven, and there's a guy who had a sign, Carpore sign that said, need help on it. Now, there are gas stations in Cape Coral.
Starting point is 01:53:56 Yes. I will admit that. There are 7-Elevens. That's big of you. That's sell gasoline. What I've not seen is a single homeless person. You've been to Cape Coral. few ties with me.
Starting point is 01:54:06 Are there homeless people there? Well, someone thought I was. Yeah, I mean, you look like it. That's you. Oh, yeah, of course. You're like, I'm not up. Actually, no, thanks for the five bucks. Yeah. It's working out.
Starting point is 01:54:18 I live, you know, I think a mile from three gas stations at least, you know? I'm sorry. But I live, like, deep in this neighborhood and, and, you know, there's no gas station people wandering onto my street. I don't know what the own is. I saw a meme that was about how places wouldn't, nice neighborhoods won't like zone a gas station,
Starting point is 01:54:39 but now they have data centers coming in. I sent it to you, and I was like, I think John saw one of these memes and is like, oh, oh, gas stations must be bad because people are saying data centers are bad. So, you know, if he's got a gas station nearby, he must be an idiot. Maybe that's what's going on.
Starting point is 01:54:54 I'm still confused about this whole gas station thing and the fact that he thinks that's really funny. He's cracking himself up looking at this stupid image someone made for him. he goes to 7-Eleven all the time this is funny somebody points out in dabbler's anonymous that Howard Stern wore almost the exact same turban when Howard Stern was doing a stern act the improbable bit all those years ago
Starting point is 01:55:20 like this is totally a rip-off of a rip-off of a rip-off which is fine it's just like John goes around talking about how everyone's unoriginal and only he's the creative one and it's like this is just completely blatantly ripped off from Howard ripping off Johnny Carson. All right. So the next day, Friday.
Starting point is 01:55:42 So that was Thursday. And by the way, like I said, he goes through Mike Morris and Shulie and LogCab and Larry and all these characters. You saw it long it took to present me and I'm editing a lot of nonsense on. So it just drags on. There's never a payoff. It's never that funny. Just someone generated these AI things for him and he's showing it like it's hilarious.
Starting point is 01:56:02 So the next day, Keanu comes on. And, you know, Kianu really understands how comedy works. She explains that I don't, but she does. And she has some good advice for him. Did you like the Duke of the future? I'm telling you, do it once a week. It has to be at least a weekly segment. I thought it was fabulous.
Starting point is 01:56:29 From the robe and the crystal ball, it was absolutely ridiculous. I loved it. Perfect instincts. Once a week to do that character. On drugs? Yes. I don't know what's happened to Keanu. I honestly don't know why she's decided that Suttering John is doing a good job on a show and laughing along with them.
Starting point is 01:56:53 It's the most embarrassing show you've ever seen. And because John gets this positive reinforcement, he decides, oh, sweet, she likes it. I'm going to do it right now. A pretty girl likes it. I got to show off my new toys that I have. The Duke. You're like, and I'm going to tell you. What's the chances that she is actually a big WATP fan,
Starting point is 01:57:17 and she's just putting him on so that she can watch this show and then laugh with us. I would have thought. She's capable of being that calculator. I know. There was a time when I would have been like, that's probably 50-50. Yeah. And now I realize that, no, she is all in on this. She thinks that this is hilarious.
Starting point is 01:57:32 And encouraging John is actually making it funnier. It is. Because John thinks he's doing something good. you're like and I'm going to tell you what's going to happen with this other person Good recap These are children
Starting point is 01:57:47 This is not real Oh you really were watching This is not real life Oh hey John You remember that time that you had the crystal ball And then you said that Carl was going to live by a gas station Man that was great That was awesome
Starting point is 01:58:01 In just one second here I had to buy props. The turban. It was so funny. It was fabulous. I thought it was great. Wow. I had to buy props.
Starting point is 01:58:20 I am telling you, this is the reason, you know, Lewis J. Gomez going, so one of these guys just make fun of stuttering John. Yes. Yes. There's a reason why everyone needs to be watching this. The more the merrier.
Starting point is 01:58:32 This is insane how bad this guy is. And Keanu's retorting. hearted. She might be the slowest person in the dabbleverse. What do you think that turbine ran him? Uh, 18 bucks. Um, I'm finding him for 12 and 13 dollars on Amazon. He's so proud of himself.
Starting point is 01:58:48 Yeah. Drop the big dollars. I got the 1398. It's a tax for it off Keanu. I'll explain that to you at some point. But John wanted Keanu on the show when he was doing this bit as he'll explain. That, you know, I predicted, right? And I think the Duke of the future. had predicted a certain thing and it has come true.
Starting point is 01:59:12 And I wanted you to be my straight man, but you fucking... I know, I have planned. I'm so sorry, but I did get to watch a good, most of it. At least all of the Duke of the Future. And I, for one, I was elated. I wanted you to be part of it, though, because as my straight man. Okay. So John was hoping.
Starting point is 01:59:33 I found glowing balls that looked like the one he's using and they're about 20 bucks. So he's in for about almost $40 on this bit. Yeah, 35 at least. Yeah. Wow. No wonder he had that in his email. I saw there was an Amazon rate your order. Your transaction, yeah.
Starting point is 01:59:50 Yeah. I was hoping you could see what the transaction was when you couldn't see it from the subject line. So yeah, I think he did get those delivered. Very exciting stuff. You know, I'll give John credit. So he did the Duky Awards, which was an embarrassing disaster. We covered that on the most recent WATP. He's
Starting point is 02:00:06 this the Duke of the Future thing. Like, he's trying stuff. He's trying to create comedy. He can't. No. It's amazing. The ineptitude is phenomenal. But he can't watch clips anymore because he's DMCA striking the channels that play his clips.
Starting point is 02:00:21 So it would look very hypocritical of him just like play clips, even though he was playing Levyverse that we saw. But whatever. So he's not doing that. So instead he's trying to create these new characters and stuff. And, yeah, John, after. playing me being right next to a gas station in my house in the future decides oh kiano i have even more footage driving around carl's neighborhood so the duke of the future predicted that lady kate
Starting point is 02:00:55 would be living next to a 7-11 gas incident i kid you not kiano this was not playing i am literally driving. I did not invest to get 7-Eleven built near his house. This is not my doing. I was out of the board meeting that approved this. I am literally driving
Starting point is 02:01:17 to the supermarket. Just, I mean, I don't want to get too technical out of this. John lives to the southeast of me where I live in Cape Coral. There's no way he'd drive past my house to get to a supermarket. Because if you go, the more northwest you go, the less
Starting point is 02:01:34 shit there is. It's just there's nothing. I'm in a very rural area. You have to go east or south to get to publics. So just saying, I just have to be driving by my way to the supermarket is a lie. He's purposely driving by my neighborhood and filming it every death. Every fucking day he's doing this. Market. And I see this and I have to share it with you. Okay. I love these. They're so good. I just, this is, this is real. Here we go. Look at this. this is Carl's what does it say the Duke of the Future
Starting point is 02:02:10 was right 711 right on his fucking block they're building a 711 gas station you stupid the Duke of the future manifested that
Starting point is 02:02:27 if any or just predicted the Duke of the I'm not playing it it it's like I don't know what the predominant gas station is in Cape Coral, Florida. I'm going to go out of a limb and say it's 7-11.
Starting point is 02:02:45 It'd be like, mostly 7-Elevens. Look, a quick trip's open over here by tab. It's the biggest fucking thing in St. Louis. You know, like, yeah, that's when their new gas stations are usually the big company that opens gas stations. You fucking moron. I know, I can't believe you thought that was a big gap. They finally put the 7-11 logo on the gas property.
Starting point is 02:03:03 He's like, holy shit, this new gas station is a 7-Eleven. Like, it'd be more impressive. he was like, it's going to be a wah-wah, and then it was a wawa, which would be uncommon. Right. I think there's only one wawa in Cape Coral. So, anyway, that was a big gotcha. Got me good with that one. He's going to be able to buy slurpees and walk there.
Starting point is 02:03:23 What a fucking loser. I honestly don't even think it's walking distance in my house. I'm pretty sure it's miles away. Yeah. Anyway, whatever. But it's on your block. It's on my block. These two are such fucking dorks.
Starting point is 02:03:37 It's so embarrassing. Yay. Yay, your turban. There's no real way a real woman can feel this way about this bit. There's just no way. She talks to him like he's a kindergartner,
Starting point is 02:03:55 but she also talks like a toddler. Yeah. So I can't tell what's happening here. The Duke of the future. She does it better than he does. That's true. Yeah, I think It is so.
Starting point is 02:04:09 It's iconic. Do something with it. You took the time to get it out. He just wanted to show it off. He was just doing show and tell with this girlfriend, Keato. Do you see the stuff I have? I'll bet she laughs at this. And she even said, she goes, yeah, I saw that yesterday.
Starting point is 02:04:26 I saw it was the whole segment. He's like, oh, you saw the somewhere where I did this? Yeah, yeah, that's the one. That's the one I saw. What is wrong with this idiot? So then you have to ask yourself, how much planning went into that that whole segment. The segment that could have been maybe five minutes,
Starting point is 02:04:41 but it was stretched out to 20. Was that a day? Was that two days? On John's end, almost zero. Someone sent him all of those images. Someone came up with the idea and put that all together for him. Oh, you think that someone came up with it for him and not him go into someone and saying,
Starting point is 02:04:58 I need an AI image of Carl's house in front of a gas station. And like he had those setups and punchlines. Yeah, I'm saying someone came up with that for him. Oh, the entire thing is really. written. Yeah, this guy, if that's what he's coming up with, if he is sitting around,
Starting point is 02:05:13 I'm trying to give him credit by saying he didn't come up with that. Yeah, I know. If that is what he's coming up with, well, he's just driving around my house, seeing what's going on there, then, holy shit. I'm going to show him.
Starting point is 02:05:26 This guy thought he should go back to L.A. to work in Hollywood again? Yes. He's insane. I got an idea for a movie. So this guy, he drinks lots of beer, and then he could see the future.
Starting point is 02:05:40 Now, one of his rivals is this gay guy who's like the lofas. He lives to a lawyer who's out to get him. This is great because a super chanter calls John out on his OCD. And John, once again, caught not having OCD. Oh, Diablo 420, how many steps is it from your bed to the bathroom? Um, hold on. One, two, three. Now, remember, he claims,
Starting point is 02:06:10 show off. When he has to go to the bathroom, he has to do this ritual in order to go from the bed to the bathroom. So this is something that's been well established. Two, three, then one, four, five, six, seven. Then I do eight, nine, ten, eleven. And then I have to get my large dog, 12, about 13, before I can,
Starting point is 02:06:33 before I can whip out my weapon. and P in the Turlet. About 13 is not OCD. No. And I feel like if you had OCD, you wouldn't want to land on 13. True.
Starting point is 02:06:44 That's a good point as well. Right. I thought there was a specific number he wanted to get to. Instead he's just like, well, let me think about this. It's probably takes me like four steps. He gets to the past the bed.
Starting point is 02:06:52 And then that's not your OCD, you idiot. About 13. He doesn't even know. I have to get out on the one side of my bed so that I can extend it because if I get out on the other, I'll hit 13, which is bad.
Starting point is 02:07:02 So I go out on the other side, so I hit 17. Right. Right. That would make more sense. Yeah. So speaking of his OCD, Foraken West, 288 posted this last week in the,
Starting point is 02:07:14 who are these podcasts up Reddit. And I thought it was pretty good. She does a little parody song to ACDC. I want to the, I'm a drooling. She says she's not a sake or anything like that. That's a hard song to sing. That's pretty good. I like that.
Starting point is 02:08:36 DM me. I'll sing it as John. Perfect. Yes. Yeah. I thought OCD worked good for that. TNT. OCD works really, really well. All right. So someone else brings up the trailer for the movie Dummy.
Starting point is 02:08:50 You guys seen this yet? Dummy the Stuttering John's story. I'll play it for you in a second, but first this is John's reaction to it. Ted, have you watched a dummy trailer? No. Didn't Vince do that? Is that Vince that did that whole thing? Did you see that?
Starting point is 02:09:06 It's like another thing when they're... Like, everything is about me being a loser, but yet, I can't imagine. Aren't you a little, and Gina must be too. Like, aren't you guys like, look, I know I'm charismatic. It's almost flattering, yes. I know I'm creative. I know I'm talented. But what is the obsession?
Starting point is 02:09:27 So, John goes, I know I haven't seen that, but why is everything about how I'm a looser? So we obviously saw it. Yes. And he goes, didn't Vince make that? So Vince put that on his dabbledown YouTube channel, but he just stole it. And this really is phenomenal. If you haven't seen it yet, it's been making the rounds. But holy shit, this is one of the best things produced in a long time.
Starting point is 02:09:50 Don't worry, Kui. Everyone will love me again. Just a matter of time. I don't know all there is to know about stuttering jump. I thought you had dabbled occasionally in stand-up, so... I dabble occasionally? I've been doing stand-up for 20 years. My headline places.
Starting point is 02:10:12 So you're more than a dabbler. This is unit 19. We're on scene. Copy unit 19. Subjectly. It was on the Howard Stern show. People are laughing at you, not with you. Tonight show.
Starting point is 02:10:38 We have our new announcer. Can you move your head, sir? Stand-up comedian. I squeam. Howard Stern. Outwriter, sputtering John, has given birth to something called the dabblerverse. I'm not running from. And it's cost me the ones I love.
Starting point is 02:11:15 Don't. I'm the biggest lull cow on the internet. Because he's dumb. He's stupid and he's never going to amount to shit. Stuttering John. Stuttering John. Stuttering John. Suttering who?
Starting point is 02:12:05 Oh, John. Who gives this shit? Oh, wait. Brilliant. Is that incredible? Brilliant. Brilliant. Holy shit.
Starting point is 02:12:35 A lot of AI slop I can't get behind. Send it to Sundance. Seriously. That is better than anything Disney's put out for Star Wars about three years. The Coors can as a little buddy and then suing him in the Corps. of law. Oh, fucking, I said, we got to get a cease and diss as this from Budweiser over the Bush light.
Starting point is 02:12:56 Yep. This is what I'm talking about. God bless who ever made that. That is the best. Oh, yeah, I should definitely give credit. People should check on this channel because it just cropped up. This video has 9,400 views. And the channel is Rathbone International Pictures.
Starting point is 02:13:17 So check that out. give them a follow, give him a thumbs up. It's really annoying that VTL reposted this and people think that it came from Dabletown, USA, or whatever that is. But yes, this is Rathbone International Pictures. Phenomenal work. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:13:35 All right, we have a spy report. I heard this this morning be dabbling live. Someone already posted it to Hot Buy 86, already posted this at Dabler's Anonymous. Oh, John has pretty much no relationship with his ex-family. And I have heard that the last member
Starting point is 02:14:00 to have any kind of communication gave John an ultimatum a ultimatum much like the others did and said, stop your drinking. Now's the time. And John said, no, Mr. Turner.
Starting point is 02:14:18 I mean, Oscar, I mean, I will not. No, child, I will not. I don't have a drinking problem. Because I only drink at night. I don't have a drinking problem. I have a drinking solution. Look at me.
Starting point is 02:14:34 So he chose the cores. He chose cooey over the last member of his family that would actually talk to him. Is that wild? I mean, that is. It's a report. I could see that happening. the kid just goes, I just need to stop drinking.
Starting point is 02:14:55 Can you imagine if, if John just disappeared from the internet like this week? He would just never heard from again. And like five years, some E True Hollywood story or something, some like feel good Instagram post was like John Melendez was like the, you know, Tonight Show announcer and gave it all up,
Starting point is 02:15:11 quit drinking. Like this is his success story. Everybody, every fucking person that makes fun of one on the internet, I'll be like, good for you, John. Yep.
Starting point is 02:15:17 Walk the haters and like reunited with his family and got his life back together. Unfortunately, that's not going to happen. No, that is definitely not what's going to happen, but we would be happy for him and his family if someone like that were to occur. Now, John's not going anywhere. He has been bragging. He's been so braggadocious about how much money he's making this month on YouTube. People just continue to pay him to insult him. Dozens and dozens of dollars. I mean, he, Clayton is going to make close to 10,000. It's not that much. But it is, it's enough to make a living for sure, the amount of money that he's getting paid.
Starting point is 02:15:51 to be on YouTube. So fortunately, the Devilverse will continue to spin around. We're not going anywhere. It continues to grow. Of course, we have the new show, Dabbleverse Live. That covers all things Dabbleverse. Now, Tab, you do a show occasionally. I do.
Starting point is 02:16:09 Where can people find that? Yeah, you can check out, here's what I don't get, HWIDG.com, kind of in a little bit of a hiatus, but we got 300-something episodes hanging around in the ether from going all the way back and then every now and again my old coast and I will hop on and dump an episode to catch up with people. I was on once over with Kaylee a few weeks ago reviewing one of my favorite movies, Rhinestone with her. And that was a lot of fun and people should go watch that movie and check out her show. And then I'd also like to plug my sister's favorite podcast, which is, of course, the creep off.
Starting point is 02:16:44 She's a big fan of this guy, Vinnie Paulino. And she takes the other guy on this show is like this kind of weird. Creepy homunculus. Two plugs is the max that we have on here. Thecreepov.com, go vote for Carl. I'll win. We'll be spinning the wheel on Monday. If you vote for Carl at the creepoff.
Starting point is 02:17:03 Classic Carl. Perfect. Yeah, so go check out Tab and Tab with Once Over with Kaylee on the Once Over with Kaylee YouTube channel. And that leads us to Lucy Typebox with the Internet News. Internet News with Lucy Tightbox From Patreon, Dame Taft knows how to butter up producer Chris
Starting point is 02:17:26 Two things I enjoy, the Living in the Past series, and Internet News. Average Cracker wishes upon a star. If only we had one more weekly dabbleverse show, Farm Reetod asks, But what would it be called? Backdoor Benji is outraged.
Starting point is 02:17:40 I can't believe there's a gas station by Clubfoot's house. Pathetic. SSD ads, Seriously? Only dumb fucks with think convenient gas and snacks is an okay thing. Mensa-level thinkers understand why this is deeply humiliating for anyone in that neighborhood. Charles Dupriopines, the idea that Opie thinks
Starting point is 02:18:00 Ron is smart is hilarious. Smart people don't live in squalor. If you're smart, you become the manager or waiter at a high-end restaurant to try and better yourself. Living like that doesn't scream smart. Opie's such a patronizing jerk. From our subreddit, shockingly efficient is concerned. There's a gas station within a half mile of me. How fucked am I? Fix it 403 advises. I wouldn't even sell. Just burn it down and pray for forgiveness.
Starting point is 02:18:27 Yorkies and sneakers shares. I can see golden arches from my driveway. They tried to warn me. Knife edge rusty cuts to the chase. I'd kill myself. You are such a loser for living there. However, I also live in your neighborhood. So what does that make me?
Starting point is 02:18:43 I'll wait. From Dabler's Anonymous, T-Bone Rick Wiscoe writes, Congratulations, John. You put about as much effort into the Duky Awards as you did into trying to keep your family together. Must be your high-spectrum OCD because you do it with everything. Foreign cow notes, he did get to dust off his tonight show announcer voice. Educational share reminds us. It's pilot season and posts a sweet pick of Duty Houser MD.
Starting point is 02:19:08 Shave it for me tags with Code Brown! Code Brown! And from YouTube, Bob DeCarlo reports, Opie's still rocking the Oswell Cobblepot memory. Dirt level simply states, Opie hate stems from Opie behavior. Christopher Kinsella demands, John, show us your cats. Opie, show us your family.
Starting point is 02:19:26 There are some mysteries of foot in the dabblerverse, and I say it's about time to get to the bottom of them. Shroom Diff Nuclear points out, Ron's hair is the saddest thing in all of this. It's Missy B inquires. Is the definition of good skin to have pre-pris skin cancer? And B.F. Somm plays us out with. Opie has long past the low cow stage.
Starting point is 02:19:46 He's now an entire Lowell Farm. Well done, Lucy and producer Chris. Thank you. Another net news segment. And I got a couple of voicemails that came in on the chorus. This is the Gary in San Diego, rock and roll a voicemail segment. It's a bunch of crap. Swing in a minute.
Starting point is 02:20:08 Rock and rolla. Hey, Carl. First time, long time. I guess that's the phrase. Anyway, I've been a fan for a long time. I've been to some live shows. I'm a supporter of your Patreon. I've been listening for probably over five years.
Starting point is 02:20:21 Thank you, sir. My wife used an order to shirt for me from your store and never came. Oh. Got to get a refund for PayPal. Fuck. I'm probably why she hates you. But anyway, the point is I'm a big fan. I just wanted to call and say that I like when you have Christian Blatt on.
Starting point is 02:20:36 I don't listen to the haters on Reddit because they're probably all pedophiles and Discord. But Christian's great. He comes prepared, brings good clips. Does that feed you a joke? good sidekick. He knows what you're doing. He gets what you're doing with the show. Plus, you have him on more and butter him up.
Starting point is 02:20:54 Maybe you can get some celebrities on. Dana Carvey, John Lovitz, Dennis Miller. I mean, I think they'd be fun to have on. Yeah, that is true. Sorry, sir, 45 seconds, please. That is true. We're going to be live on the WTP YouTube channel,
Starting point is 02:21:09 halftime during the Super Bowl. Dennis Miller will be on for the halftime show brought to you by who are these broadcasters. Very exciting. I'll be tuning in for that. Yeah. What's the halftime show of the Super Bowl this year? Bad Bunny.
Starting point is 02:21:23 Oh, yeah, I could probably miss that. You sure? I think I could miss that. I think I'd watch it out of Smeller on this channel instead. I don't know. Ice might arrest him in the middle of the halftime show, which would be hilarious. Right. Bad Bunny's the one who won't tour in the U.S. because of ICE right now.
Starting point is 02:21:38 Yeah, yeah. Too many illegals go to his show that the ice would just be too tempted. But there's so many illegals. Can we go? Can we go? Stuttering John is just so fucking retarded. You think? Who would want to live by a parkway? Motherfucker, everyone.
Starting point is 02:22:02 They're beautiful. I don't know if you know this. There's one on the East Coast that travels a dozen states and thousands of people drive on it a year from all over the country they come to fucking drive it. It's called the Blue Ridge Parkway. Sounds nice. I live in Asheville, North Carolina.
Starting point is 02:22:22 Sorry to hear that. You can't fucking get around Asheville during the fall because so many people are fucking here. And you know what those people do? They're like, oh, I just love it. I love it here so much. So they fucking move here permanently. Good news.
Starting point is 02:22:39 It's Hurricane and Hulian got rid of most of those. So fuck you, bye. All right. Thanks for the call. Appreciate it. Hey, Carl. I bought my house. over 10 years ago in a pretty popular suburb of Metro Detroit.
Starting point is 02:22:51 It's pretty busy suburb. Anyway, I get through the Google search, and there's like four gas stations within a quarter mile of my house. No. Am I up for? Yes. Yeah. Just call me back with the answer.
Starting point is 02:23:02 I'm sure you're hanging out with the homeless people who frequent those suburban gas stations. I like that your show has slowly become gas station nearby anonymous, and just people calling in and being like, I live, I've got three near, I actually like have homeless people buy my my gas stations because I live in St. Louis, which is the most dangerous city in America. Right. Not Cape Coral, Florida, a suburb of a suburb of a suburb. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 02:23:27 Yeah. I get messages from like guys like Drew Laid who tell me like I got this house. It's this close to a gas station. I have this property. Everyone's been doing the research on this like, shit, do I live near gas station? I should look this up. Oh, no. Yeah, I've got like five or six around me.
Starting point is 02:23:45 Oh, God. Tab, you've got to figure out your wife, my friend. I don't know my house down and just ask for forgiveness. That's right. I don't know about that, voice green, but what makes me raise about this show, I quite like it. Carl, you ever considered just reviewing your own show? I mean, sometimes I'm taking it back at the stances that Carl makes and the end company. It's like, wow, you've got a lot of criticism and a lot of good observations.
Starting point is 02:24:14 But? I know movie critics are movie makers, but like, you ever could, could you just do one of your older shows and be like, wow, this guy sucks? I don't know. Didn't you used to do that like once a year? And it was so self-aggrandizing. Yeah, we did it twice. Is it like episode 200 and episode 300 or something like that? I don't know.
Starting point is 02:24:34 I would do it again. It's been a while. Yeah. Go back and review an old WATP. We did use to suck. Still do what we used to too. Hey, listen to you guys talk about. Opie and Ron.
Starting point is 02:24:47 And you're wondering why he doesn't Opie want PayPal or Ron's PayPal? My theory is that he doesn't really care if the money ends up in his own pocket, but he wants it to be towards the show.
Starting point is 02:25:03 You always talk about him caring about the numbers and stuff. Maybe it's just a stat that he wants to be able to present. Oh, look at all the money that the show brings in. You know, maybe it's not going to his own pocket, but maybe he's trying to use it for a deal or something. No, it's going in his pocket.
Starting point is 02:25:21 It's definitely going in his pocket. But that's an interesting point, though. He wants to show that people will give him money. I think he's trying to grease the wheel a little bit. Is that the term? Sure. But it was just as easier for them to go in at the beginning of the episode and be like, what did you get last week?
Starting point is 02:25:36 500 bucks? I got 500 bucks. That's a thousand bucks for the show. Not bad. Ha-ha. Like Aaron Hymhole does. He's just like, oh, look at Benmo. He just gave us $45.
Starting point is 02:25:44 Yeah. So I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about this. I probably shouldn't. So let's keep this between us. Let's be cool. Everyone be cool. I got a message from Mike Boudet, the host of Sort and Scale. And he goes, Carl's, when's the next time that Opie's doing one of these match with Ron the waiter shows?
Starting point is 02:26:01 Oh, Goundhog's Day, right? Well, so they've been playing around. They haven't really determined that that's going to be the day or not. Okay. Because then he brought up Valentine's Day. So they're vague about it. Just like they were last time, too. Right.
Starting point is 02:26:13 But Mike Bude is like, I want to give him $1,000. So the OPS to match $1,000 to give to Rod. It's like that's hilarious. You definitely have to do that. So watch out for that. That could be fun. I have one more here. Hey, I'm starting beef with the gay furry that you had on.
Starting point is 02:26:29 I'm a gay transgender furry. And I actually go to conventions and have gay sex and have a fur suit. And, you know, would be happy to answer your questions more correctly than that tool did. also have Mike call me he owes me a handy okay uh wasn't wasn't the other guy a gay black furry yes which i didn't know we got to really delve in to see who the like real oppressed one is in there maybe maybe he doesn't have a suit because of systemic oppression do you think about that good point yeah boom actually i like i like this answer to that he's just like well when i have that kind of money i there's better think that's about that money i was like yeah you're smart yeah i didn't know they're that
Starting point is 02:27:11 expensive. You know, yeah, $5,000 a low on. You know what I was shocked by? Since we interviewed that furry on the show, I have received, that's one example. I've received multiple messages from furries
Starting point is 02:27:24 saying you should have me on the show. Fuck that person. Like everyone, all the furries hated that furry. And all the furries are listening. They're into it. Yeah. It's really funny.
Starting point is 02:27:34 I'm getting messages through Discord, through email, voicemails. Welcome to who are these furries. We interview furries. And then, I'm out of the dead versus people. I'm into fursonas now.
Starting point is 02:27:45 That's what I'm into. I was not expecting that. Pretty wild stuff. Ted, thanks again, buddy. It's so good to see you. Yeah, nice. Thanks for having me. Let's do it again soon.
Starting point is 02:27:55 Yeah. Take it easy. I got to go. Bye. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go.
Starting point is 02:28:06 Okay, bye. I got to go. Bye. This is Nate from Flint, Michigan. And guess what? This voicemails over. Yes. Thank you for tuning in.
Starting point is 02:28:21 Bye. Bye. This is it. It's over. Okay. Goodbye. Goodbye. Hey, bye.
Starting point is 02:28:34 Goodbye. Okay. Okay. Bye. It is true, Carl.

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