Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep729 - Mostly Dating

Episode Date: May 24, 2026

Get ready to meet Carleigh Ferrante, a 30-something year old skeleton who gives out dating advice to people who apparently have no common sense, no self-esteem, and no dignity. She teaches losers how to flirt, what types of dates to go on, and even how to text. Finally, someone who can teach me how to text! Can there be some astrology mixed in? You betcha!! Lucy Tightbox joins the show to watch a fake interview with Billy Corgan on legendary LA radio station KROQ. Stuttering John gets cockblocked on Stephanie Miller’s show by the guest’s mom. But that doesn’t stop him from asking embarrassing questions and using his children for LGBTQ clout. Opie had an amazing stream on Thursday morning that started with his depression over losing his only friend, then admitting to going back to therapy, and then addressing our show talking about him having a falling out with Matt at Gebhard’s. He also brings on a special guest who is supposedly a longtime friend but really she’s someone he definitely does not care about. We finish with Net News and your voicemails. Subscribe to Lucy’s YouTube page if you dare: https://www.youtube.com/@OnceOverwithCayley  Support us, get bonus episodes, and watch live every Saturday and Wednesday: ⁠⁠http://bit.ly/watp-patreon⁠⁠ ⁠⁠https://watp.supercast.tech/⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're no longer young people. You're just people. And people are either productive or dead weight. It's my first day of work, and I need to make a big impression. Were you just checking me out? No. It's too bad. I see at least 15 ladies I need to talk to before my beta block is off.

My coworkers don't take me seriously. It's not a human. It's just a piece of meat. Someone bring a gurney. Hey, y'all. It's Kelly Clarkson with Wayfair. Ever order furniture online and wonder what if? Like, what if it doesn't hold up?

That sofa was four days old. You should have ordered from Wayfair. With Wayfair, there's no what it. Just style you love and quality you can trust. Visit Wayfair.com. Wayfair, every style, every home. I told them, and the strongest of words, to just do it. You see, this is a...

We Just Do It kind of show. Buckled down. Episode number seven. 29. Are you a boner guy? Oh, I was a boner guy. You know what? I missed penis.

What are you talking about? I'm... the one who should apologize. Is it going to be absolutely riveting? Is it going to change your life by any stretch? Probably not, but it's going to be at least entertaining, okay? By the way, for those people that are in the back, remember to shut the fuck up. Maddie-Oh!

Cuzzaroo! Cuzzaroo! Slapperoon. It's showtime. ATP. WATP. Hello, we're going to welcome to another episode of Who has podcast. The only show that respects their audience too much to go to Italy for a month.

I'm your host Carol. With me this week, the chick with real boobs and a fake smile. It is Lucy Tightbox from once over with Kaylee. I'm happy to be partially fake. Thank you. Also, producer Chris is with us. Hi. Go to Who Are These.com.

Get our email address, a voicemail number. Link to the subreddit, link to our Discord server, like to our merchandise, link to our YouTube channel. And that link to Patreon is a supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month. Also, we encourage our listeners, give us five stars wherever you review podcasts and then shit all over us in the comments section today. We'll be reviewing mostly dating. This is a suggestion from Jack Rockstar. We've all listened separately, not discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it.

The show hosted by Carly. Carly has a YouTube channel with 91 subscribers. And when Jack Rockstar sent this in, he described it as this. A show came across my desk called Mostly Dating, in which a 36-year-old woman named Carly, who manifested her relationship, attempts to give you dating advice. She's also a runner,

which seems to be her only personality trait outside of having a podcast, and living in New York City. And as we'll find out, she also fancies herself a writer as well. And boy, does she have some skills when it comes to writing, but she loves to give advice to people

on social media. She talks about Instagram a lot. And she has this. podcast. And she has a lot of questions from people who want to know how to date. And for some reason, she thinks she has the answers. I'm not sure what makes her an expert. Lucy, did you pick up on that at all? I think she thinks she's great. So that's why she thinks she's an expert. Okay. I don't know if that really is how that works. I don't think it qualifies her. I just think that's what her theory is. Okay. Well, she has a bunch of videos out. She stopped making videos

recently. She still does the podcast. But she stopped making videos for some reason. She oftentimes has guest center show. Sometimes she's so well. I have some examples of both. But a year ago, she made a video just before Christmas time. And the title of the video is my family doesn't want my partner to come to her holidays. It has 11 views. They don't want her to go either. Right. So in this video, she is going to explain that she's getting a lot of feedback from her listeners, that flirting is an art form of the past, that people don't know how to flirt anymore. And so they're going to her for help with that and her suggestions.

I have never gotten so many questions about a topic that I posted about recently. Now a few weeks ago on my feed and will be linked in the show notes here, how to flirt. So this is something that I kind of asked in a bunch of different posts that I've had over the past few months is, is this something people want me to talk more about? Because I just kept getting messages from people after episodes or after posts on Instagram that everyone was saying they don't know how to flirt or like complaining that other people don't know how to flirt anymore. And it was just like kind of a post-COVID thing where people don't know how, not even how to flirt, but how to express interest. Send a dick back. I'm sorry. I know there's a modern,

uh, social commentary that she has on this show. But is that out of style now? No, it's not. Okay. Why are you looking at me? It seems pretty easy to figure out. But you also have to have confidence, and she explains that. So the first thing that is at the crux of flirting in a successful way is just having confidence. Also have a big dick, but you said to tick pick. Okay.

Well, that's actually pretty sound advice so far. Send a picture of somebody else's dick. Sure, if you have to, in a pinch. That'll definitely help things. She has other tips for having more confidence, which helps you with flirting. So I thought we could all learn. And then another one that it might sound a little strange for building confidence is learning new things regularly. I'm out.

Neverbind. Yeah. I know it's going to be so much work. Fuck that. Smacks of effort. Yeah. Seriously, it really does. You mean like the lighting for my dick pick?

Is that what I need to learn about? This angle, that angle. Oh, angles too. I didn't even think of that. I'll just have to ask actor Steve about the three point. lighting thing. Maybe he'll know about the angles, too. That's a good idea. Here's something that where I was just like, listen, fine. I'll learn new things regularly if that's what's going to help me with my confidence. But this is a bridge too far. The more you listen to them

and the more engaged you are in the conversation and just staying present, you'll have like so much more to work with when you're actually like flirting with them. You get into like the actual flirting. I have to listen to the other person. I'm a straight man. We're talking about women. I have to listen to what they're saying and process it? Who is this advice for? Idiots. No, but I mean, who's watching this podcast? Is she giving advice to men?

That's a good question. I was looking at her Instagram to see who was interacting with her. Women. It's all women. It's all dumb women. Yeah. So actually telling them to listen, maybe it is a good thing. Maybe stop talking so much.

Here's another tip about how to flirt and show your confidence. If you like something that they're wearing or something that they're doing or you like their laugh or something like that, like tell them. If you're having fun, you can say it. Like that you can do these things in a flirty, lighthearted way and just that directness of being like, wow, I'm having such a good time or, oh, you look really good in that shirt. Like compliments are another huge, huge way to flirt, one of my favorite things. So why to them? Okay. Mystery said in the game, you neg women.

She's like, just tell them everything that they want to hear. Right. It's basically it. I never thought of that. Right? Yeah. Pretty good stuff, actually. I would do this all wrong.

And you would think that when it comes to interacting with other human beings, that this is something that you kind of learn just from your experience. You can't really learn it from a podcaster. Explaining to you. As an earthling. Yeah, right. You wouldn't just like listen to a podcaster, tell you how to interact with people and figure it out that way.

Play with like your body language a little bit because a lot of what flirt. A lot of, like, flirting is really down to just, like, your energy. It's, like, not something that you can, like, write a recipe for. It's more about, like, opening up your energy and, like, mirroring their actions, making eye contact, smiling. How is the fifth thing? We're going through a list of things to do. She's like, and really, there's no, like, way to tell you how to do this. There's no recipe for it or formula.

Not only that, but can you imagine this monotone, stiff bitch being interesting in any way at all? This is not good body language, my dear. No. This advice is more vanilla than her appearance. Yes. So, yeah, somehow. And then she has the balls to talk about this thing you can do. Another thing that, like, I'm sure people who are listening are laughing about,

because I always talk about doing activity dates and things like that together, challenging them to something or, like, placing a little bet on something. If you guys are out watching a sports game, place a bet on that, or just, like, challenge them to. A drinking contest? Yes. Shots, shots, shots, shots, let's go. One for one, let's go.

Yeah, she seems like she's a lot of fun. Let's go out and watch a sporting event together. Women's softball again? Okay, I'll take the blue team. Cool. Lucy, would you pick up on you? You checked out a different episode. Oh, my God.

She is excruciating. I had a really hard time clipping her because every single thing that she says is just platitudes. But you mentioned that she is just a solo host. Sometimes she has guests. She actually previously had a coach. host. Did you know that? Oh, she ran that person off? Yeah. She, I, that's at least what I'm assuming. So I did that to you, I guess. You think about it. Yeah. So in, in this, in this episode that I was checking out, she is going to address her previous co-host named Mia not being there anymore. I ended up rebranding it about a year ago when Mia decided to leave the podcast. And people always ask who have been around for those four years, because now it's been four years since we started. People always ask, are you and Mia still friends? Yes, Mia and I are still best friends. She just had a baby.

We text all the time. We see each other very often. I actually have not met the baby yet, but we are still very close and we didn't have any falling out. But what just happened was that she wanted to focus on her career outside of the podcast. And I wanted to really take the podcast to the next level. So we ended up parting ways. And now here we are.

Sounds like they had a falling out. I'm not buying that explanation at all. She's my best friend. She just had a baby. I haven't got over to meet the baby. Babies are stupid. Now, not only that, but Mia hasn't been on the podcast for about a year, so why are we still addressing this? Yeah.

And I would like to point out that Mia did not have the baby a year ago, but rather something that did happen a year ago was that Carly got into a new relationship. Oh, she manifested a relationship. Yep, she sure did. So I am guessing that that is a big reason that Mia is no longer here. So in my clip to Carly is going to cope more about not having Mia by herself. God. The past year of me taking over has been really exciting, really cool to see the community grow so much. And really, like, I was so nervous in the beginning of going solo and having a solo podcast. But I love it. It's like, of course, I miss Mia.

And we used to have, like, such a great time recording together and running the Instagram together and everything that went along with being co-host of the podcast. But there's something about doing it on your own that's just like you obviously have to do more work, but you have so much freedom. Also, I was fucking her husband. She's basically saying, oh, my God, my friend ditched me. I am lonely as balls, but I'm making this podcast in the hopes that you guys will please be my friends. Will you guys, please, please? Can I not meet your babies also? Done.

Yeah, no problem with that. So this has caused a little bit of an issue, though. She's been having a hard time with scheduling and putting out the podcast content because she's been so, so busy. And I, even though I give dating advice for a part of my. making a living. Things are not always like perfect in my life either. I also like again, if you're new here, you might not know. I split my time between doing this podcast and I also am an editor and write wellness content. And so I am very immersed in the wellness world and dating and lifestyle and all of those things. But that doesn't mean that I have it like all figured out.

And so this year like it's just been kind of one thing after another. First I lost my previous full-time job and then I ended up losing my grandfather and I just feel like there's like a million things going on and it's been like a lot. So she's complaining that she doesn't have time for anything. It sounds like she has extra time. She doesn't have a job. She doesn't have a grandfather. She's got so much extra time.

No friends. Yeah, no friends. Not hanging out with babies. I fucking hate people who give advice have to explain. By the way, I don't have everything figured out. Yeah, no shit. No one thought that. No one said you were going, how did you figure it all out?

lady. Now, Carl, I mentioned in that clip, Carly was mentioning that she also writes. Yes. And I mentioned that I found on her website a list of all of the things that she's written. And I noticed quite the pattern on them, which is that every single thing that she has ever written is basically just a paid advertisement. It's like, why I needed this one pan in my kitchen. I had no idea what PemphMAT was.

And now I use it daily. Save $150 is the title of this article. Here's what it's called. This supplement increased my nightly R.E.M. sleep over 400%. This at-home body cupping kit has saved me hundreds in-office treatments. And when you click into these articles, you'll see that there's an affiliate link. Buy Now. Every article has a Buy Now affiliate link, and it's tracking where this comes from, so she gets a percentage of the sale.

It's not even advertising. It's just affiliate. It's affiliate advertising. Well, this is what she's so busy with her time. with. She's been trying to, I mean, she's got... This is not right. Like, no one's going to take any of this seriously. You're just talking... You just have products at every single one.

I will admit, though, I did look at her vibrator reviews. Oh, really? Does she have those? Yeah, she does. I think you can scroll down a little bit and find them. They were not good. Under food and home or... Under beauty sex? Yeah, it's actually exercise and sports. I've tried every vibrator out there. This is the one my sex life was missing.

I'm convinced. I don't know the answer, actually, still. All right. How much can you say about it? It's $145. The Golden Hour Kit. By now. All right.

Let's see what we got here. I want a secret discount now. That's stupid. I want to spend the full amount, please. You got to support Carly. Come on. Okay. Lucy, when's your birthday?

Because you can get this for four interest-free payments of 36-25. That sounds like affordable for even at a podcaster's salary. I can't wait. I really trust her. Wow, I didn't realize that she got into that element of things. Yeah, she does not come across. No. She seems quite prudish if you ask me about a little uptight.

A little uptight, yeah. I would agree with that. She also has a guest son who help us out to understand other things that are complete horse shit that can't possibly mean anything to anyone. Erica Stein. She is the co-host of the Courageous Wellness Podcast, and she recently started a wellness branch of their business. So welcome to mostly dating, Erica.

Hi. I'm so happy to be here, and I'm so excited for your evolution. And I've been watching everything with mostly dating. And I just love it. So she's the only one. She's me. Yeah. So this woman, Erica Stein.

recently started a wellness astrology branch of her business. Of course. Sure. I'm sure that business is right. Because I'm not buying it that she's making any money with this astrology bullshit she's doing. Also, did they say that the name of her podcast was Courageous Wellness? That's the one. That might be the dumbest name I've ever heard.

Mostly dating is pretty stupid. Mostly dating sucks. Courageous Wellness sucks. And Erica Stein, I went and checked out her channel, 17 subscribers. She's doing great. I heard you, Tim. And it turns out that it wasn't as if Curley went and found her and said, you got to come on my podcast.

Erica pitched herself to be on this show. And then you said something in your message that you, yes, wellness astrology, but you're like, we can talk about the dating aspect because I think that's a big part of wellness. And I'm like, me too. Like, that's what I always try to say is that it plays in dating and relationships play into every area of your life and then vice versa. So I think it's going to be really cool to see how we can use astrology to help us in areas. Absolutely. Yeah. No, I agree completely.

Okay, you're the one who pitched it. She literally reached out to this woman who gets 10 views on a video and says, I'd love to be a guest on your show. Listen, Carly has 132 subscribers. That's a big step up from 17. I understand what you're, wait, she's 132 subscribers. Yeah, she does pretty well on Instagram when I checked on Instagram. On Instagram, yes, on Instagram she gets some people checking your stuff out. Maybe it is 91. I don't know. What am I doing? It'd be a fucking literal. It all rounds to zero. I'm being a literal over here for no reason. I like what Steve said.

Her vibrator filed a restraining order. Vibrators hanging out with Mia now. That's not great. Here's how you know that Erica has a very successful podcast that she's doing, that courageous wellness. And so it was kind of this aha moment I had. We've been doing the podcast now for six years. We've done 350 episodes.

And we, um, tell me your podcast. is not listened to by anyone without telling you your podcast is not listening to by anyone. We've had six years. We've made 350 episodes. Great. That's not how you measure success in podcasting. The amount of bullshit no one cares about that you push out.

Anyway, when I'm looking into the compatibility I have my partner from an astrology standpoint, should I use the Co-Star app? I'm sure you guys use Co-Star for all your astrology needs. It gives you your horoscope every morning. It's personalized. for you. So I could probably just use that to hook up with broads, right? But there's so much more

sinister we can look at in a chart. And if you have, you know, moon sign to someone's sun sign or Venus sign to someone's rising sign, there's so much more than apps like CoStar can really share with you when it comes to compatibility. Apps like CoStar also don't look at things like carmic planets, like your north node, your south node, which I also think can really inform relationships too. I hope I just saved you guys a lot of time using CoStar. So CoStar is going to teach me how to use the North Node to get the good dick pick? What is...

No, it's not going to. You have to go to this bitch. She'll teach you how to get the dick pick that you're looking for. I got to tell you, astrology talk loses me every fucking dime. It is such horseshit. And my biggest problem with astrology, and I realize it goes a lot deeper than that because learned about that this morning is for some reason everyone who was born within this 30-day span has like the same thing that's going to happen to them and the same personality traits like

I always thought that like your horoscope's kind of bullshit for that reason it's not like personalized I always wished that they would make horoscopes and newspapers back in the day super specific like Steve get off the shitter yeah doing things because that one guy Steve would be like whoa bet the over yeah right there used to be an email scheme for betting where they'd be like we have the lock for this football game and they send out, you know, thousands of these. 50% say the Broncos are going to win. 50% say the Cowboys are going to win. And eventually you're hitting people where you've been right 13 times in a row.

And people are like, holy shit. This is fucking wild. Where is this bet on my life? Right. They just start throwing money at the person. This guy knows every fucking game. I wish they would do that with horoscopes because most of us would realize like, oh, this is wrong and it has nothing to do with me like we do now.

But yeah, you could like fuck with people. pretty good if you did that. But I always thought, like, the horoscope can't be specific. You know, it can't be talking about me if it's just this huge range of days where there's tons of people. You know, and one-twelfth of people have been porn. You know what I mean? That's a lot of show off. It's a lot of fucking people.

I can't do the percentage of my head. But I guess I was wrong about that. I guess it is very specific. We also have outer planets, but they mostly define a generation. So millennials are the pluton. and Scorpio generation. So everyone who is born in this period of time, we're all Pluto and Scorpio. So what the fuck's the point?

Can you dumb it down for me? It's a whole generation of people. Okay. Everybody alive right now is also alive right now. Crazy. Whoa. Blow in my mind. I'm going to sign up for your newsletter.

Thank you. Lucy type box. Yeah. Extra horoscopes. I mentioned that she's audio only now. I was looking in at an audio-only show from February, and she'll just read questions that she gets on social media and answer them for us. Here's an example of one of the questions she gets.

To give me an idea who are her audiences, who these people are like, I need more relationship advice from this dingy broad. Hi, Carly. I found you on Instagram a few months ago, and I've been going back and listening to old episodes of your podcast. I love your perspective on dating and relationships, and I have a question I'm curious about your take on.

My boyfriend and I have been together for two years and recently started talking about moving in together. One thing I'm noticing more now is how differently we handle money. He makes a good income, but is extremely cautious about spending to the point where even small things feel like negotiations. I'm not reckless with money, but I enjoy nice dinners out, trips, gifts for birthdays, etc. With him, everything turns into a cost breakdown conversation. It's gone to the point where when we're out to dinner, I feel like I just try to pick the least expensive thing on the menu. there isn't a comment about the cost. The most annoying thing, though, is that he wasn't cautious like this when we first met.

He took me on a bunch of really nice dates, but now everything seems to come with a comment about the cost. All right. So this bitch is like, my guy's not spending that money on me. Yes. He needs to be spoiled a little bit. He's not doing that. You know how you ask people to keep voicemails to 30 seconds?

Can we keep these to 20 words? I know. It's a long one. I cut it up, too. At least we don't have to see your face. But I don't think, currently is even understanding what the question is. Another really interesting question. We had a question a couple months ago now.

It was kind of the opposite. It was from a woman who felt like her partner wasn't money-minded, and she was concerned about the misalignment there. This is the opposite end where I'm not saying you're not money-minded, but it seems like you think he's like too money-minded. No, it's not money-minded. She goes, he's not spending money on me. I want gifts.

I want expensive dinners. I want trips that we go on. She said money, me, money now. Right. That was the question. How do I get this asshole to spend more money on me? And the answer is easy. You either put out more or you don't put out at all.

You know, you try both of those things. See which one works because all guys are different. Is you Scorpio? Probably. That's how that works, right? So there's a lot of talk about her Instagram. I checked out her Instagram. And what she does on here, you know, you've used the word platitude, Lucy.

I sure did. She puts out a post. This is a recent one, two days ago. 37 things I've learned in 37 years. So now you've got to go to this fucking slideshow that goes out forever. Number one, there is no correct timeline for life. You're exactly where you're supposed to be as long as you're doing the work and moving authentically. Shut up.

That means nothing. Yeah. That is nothing at all, too. There is so much more to celebrate than dating marriage and kids. Stop waiting for those milestones to feel like your life has started. that means now three the right person

makes you feel more like you not less where is she getting these from she's just copying this right fortune cookies she's a writer she's a writer she's a writer

I mean this is why I don't believe that vibrator is the greatest vibrator to ever exist you don't think that this is just a quote from the vibrator review

oh you know I didn't read the vibrator reviews I'm still got to catch up on yours Lucy no time for Carly's anyway you get the point it's this whole Instagram

It's just platitudes and the dumbest fucking people who write things like heart emoji. These were great. And love this three heart emojis. I mean, this is what we're talking about here. Scroll down. It says, I'm so lonely. Mia. So bad.

All right, Lucy, what else we got? All right. Well, so I checked out an episode that was called six dates that you should go on before defining the relationship. So this is advice for people who are newly starting out to do. date and it is pedantic to say the least. Date one, my clip four is going to be the screener date. At a bar, you met them on the street, you met them on an app. This is a new person for you, even a setup.

First date is the screener. And that means it's drinks, it's coffee, it's a walk, it's ice cream, whatever. It's something doesn't necessarily have to be like super casual. It can be out like a nice bar if you want it to be. But it's something low stakes. It's something that doesn't have a time. What the fuck is a nice bar? Sounds interesting, though.

Like, commitment to it. It's not, I, it's not like a sports game. It's not a four-course meal. It's just something where you can go meet the person and screen them. That's why I like to call it the screener. So again, it can be any of those number of activities, whatever type of thing that you're into, but I wouldn't suggest an actual, like, activity. I got a feeling it's nothing but first dates for this.

bitch. We will hear more about that because really you go on more than six dates, which is really extremely annoying. I love that, though. It can be any of those activities, but I wouldn't actually suggest doing an activity. Yeah. I'm a little confused. Also, do you fuck after ice cream?

Is that traditionally? Or during. One of my notes is actually, and when is the gang bang date? Right. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. She talks nothing about when you should have your first kiss, when you should start banging,

nothing like that. This is just nice, beautiful dates that were going to. going on because we love each other. So the second date is going to be the dinner date. See, I measure it in hours. I'm like first base by the first base by the first hour, third base by the first hour. And I got another date in four hours. So the next date, I believe should be a dinner date. Doesn't necessarily mean that has to be date too, but that's the next type of date that you should introduce when you're introducing something. Hold on a second. She goes, the first day should be this. The next date should be that. But it doesn't have to be number two. That's

kind of how math works though. Yeah, I don't understand why we're defining anything. Just go on dates. She's basically saying you can just continue going on these dates as long as you need to. In other words, don't bang forever. So great. Wait, don't bang in forever? Forever. Don't, I don't. Words. It's the next type of date that you should introduce when you're introducing something into these dates before defining the relationship. Sometimes there's a second walk or a second coffee date or a second drink date after the initials greener date. And that's totally fun. Like maybe you went for a walk for the first date. Then you get drinks for the second date. Continue to get to know them. But I do think eventually there should be a dinner date.

Yeah, no shit. She really wants dinner. Stick on the fucking dinner already. Jesus Christ. We keep going on walks. Oh, it's so stupid. All right. Third date is the vibe date. My personal favorite. I also think one thing I put in this list was like a vibe date. And so the reason that I put this in here and this could be, this could be like two birds with one stone type of situation where the dinner day is the viby date or maybe the second drinks date is like a viby bar. Either way, I think like once you've both decided that you're interested in continuing to get to know each other after date one or whenever it is, I think you should go to a setting that's like going to build

the chemistry and the connection. And so that's what the viby day is. Is that short for vibrator? It's got to be. I don't understand any of those words. I have no idea what a viby date is. And I don't understand why I have to go on 50 walking dates, but I can combine my viby date with my dinner date. You know what? She told me earlier that I was supposed to listen. I totally forgot. I forgot about that. I tuned right out of that one. My clip seven, uh, we didn't get to hear the word viby enough. A viby date. The viby date. The viby date. The viby date is the viby date. And that's why I do recommend going on this viby date. Jesus Christ. I love how she was.

She fixes her hair at the end. And that's why I do recommend the viby date. Also, her hair, she could spend a little bit more time on her hair. I'm glad you said it. Your grandpa's dead. Fix your hair. Right. You should have more time in the morning.

God. I don't understand. All right. Our fourth date is going to be the activities date. And actually, Carl, one of your clips mentioned this. This is her favorite type of date for some reason. Then there's the activity dates. So if you guys have been following or listening for a while,

you know how much I love activity dates. There's actually research behind this. So there's research that shows that couples that try new things together and step outside of their comfort zone together have longer lasting, healthier, happier relationships. You take forever to say nothing. I learned something from that one. There's research that proves that couples that don't hate each other are actually happier. Interesting.

Neat. I'm glad they did the research on that. I know, right? I like that she goes. You guys have heard me say this. In other words, it's just repetitive bullshit. Yes. Someone says that's like, I'll just repeat the same shit over and over again.

Because how long can you just give advice I'm going on dates? Oh, people were begging her to make this episode. Of course they were. They were begging her. Yeah, there's a lot of people out there. If they receive a single DM, they're like, everybody wants to know the answer to this thing. Yeah. She also claimed that people were stealing this concept from her.

Okay. Yeah, I cannot imagine. She's killing it. You know, just making all this money. It's true. It's true. She sees a happy couple and she's like, you're ripping me off. Yeah.

Yeah, that's my job over there. So the fifth date is going to be the educational date. Don't tell anyone how you guys do it, okay? Sorry. All right, so the educational date. So her current boyfriend actually brought her on an educational date when they first started dating, which is where you're supposed to learn something about your new potential partner. I thought you'd learn about Paul Revere.

Yeah. That could be the case. But I don't think that this was her favorite. favorite type of date. And so he said, let's do a museum date. I don't really love museums. And they're still together miraculously. No shit.

All right. All right. The sixth date is the friend date. What? That's the first date. Would we just take an entire fucking loop around? We're back at square one again? Boring.

Number six is probably the most controversial one on the list. This is the friend date or dates. like doesn't matter depends on how long you end up dating before to find any relationship. Why are we back to square one? I have no idea. I don't know. I can't figure out what she is saying at any point in time. She's basically saying you should introduce your new potential partner to your friends.

No shit. Never introduce this girl to your friends. That's the controversial part. Yeah. Like all the controversy she's causing with this stuff. Now, you might be asking yourself, Carly, is this an exact science? Will following this path ensure that I can actually define my relationship and be in love forever? That's a good question.

All of these dates, the reason I say you should quote, always go on them, and again, it's not an exact science. But the reason I say that is because it just helps you get to know them. It helps you get to see them in different situations. Oh my gosh. She just made all that up? God damn it. I thought researchers worked for decades on that. Yeah.

So the key to these six dates is to date somebody. Yeah, a bunch of different dates and stuff. do different things together. She does say that we do have to keep going on dates, though. We do. Lucky us. Okay. So you don't end it at six and just go, well, we did it.

No. She wants dinner every night. What? She doesn't look like she's dinner every night. No. I'd be surprised. Do you want to keep going through your clip? Yeah.

You wouldn't hit 12. Yeah. Find out why are we on through this list? That's also why I always say you should keep doing these types of dates through the entire relationship because you should always keep getting to know somebody. First of all, because you'll never know every single person, every single thing there is to know about a person. And second of all, because people are always changing.

So don't you want to continue to get to know the person that you're spending your time or potentially your life with? No. Couldn't this woman be spending her time teaching us how to make sandwiches or something else that everyone already knows how to do? I imagine that her boyfriend is very happy that she's doing this podcast because he has to spend less time with her. Yeah, go babble to the fucking camera over there.

The public demands it. Yeah, she's not telling us anything that people wouldn't already know. Well, she basically said you have to go on these six dates before you define your relationship. But also, you should continue doing those dates after you define the relationship. And also, it's probably going to be more than six dates before you go to define the relationship. Also, what the fuck is defining the relationship? I don't know. That's, it comes up in one of my clips coming up as well.

I was very confused about that. You have one more clip on here. I sure do. This is, she's been talking about dating so much. And I'm sure that you really wanted to know about her actual dating life. Of course. I was referencing my relationship earlier. When I think back to the early dates that we had, I can give you a little rundown.

That was another, that's a question in one of my listener questions today was what described the early dating stages. So I guess I can just give that now. So with my boyfriend, our first date was the drinks date. We went to Soho House in New York City and had drinks. Our second date was a dinner date. So really following these steps here. Our second date, we went to Anton's in the West Village and had dinner.

And then we went to like a couple of different bars after that. Yeah, she does continue. But I'm just going to point out that again, I don't think that that friend date went very well because Mia disappeared right around the same time. Oh, yeah. Got to go. All right. So she's following these rules. And she has to tell her boyfriend that these are the rules to dating me.

Like these are the things we have to do in this order. Also, I don't like museums. Stop taking me to them. What about sports games? Now, let's get back to flirting. She's talking all about how to flirt when you're on the date with the person and be charming and fun and all those things. But did you know, and I was surprised by this, that you can even communicate with that person after the date? Some people are not like super engaged textor, so maybe you're not texting, you shouldn't be texting like all day, every day between your dates.

but maybe you send them like a quick text reminding them how much fun you had on your last date or telling them they looked good last time you saw them or something like depending on what the vibe already is between the two of you and how often you've been out and like where you are in the dating phase. You can choose like how direct you want to be or if you want to be like send out like the sexy flirting vibes or if you just want to make it like more lighthearted. Like when can I see you next with like a cute emoji or something like that? You can feel it out that way. Wow. So I can use. texting. I didn't realize this. To continue to lie to the chick and set up future dates.

That's where I've been going wrong. Right? Yeah. It's like, oh, communicate during the week and talk about what you'll be doing that weekend together via text message. Wow. This really is like a modern guide to dating. It's so helpful. This is also a very helpful tip. I wish I could do this. Anything you could do to make them like genuinely laugh because again, having that similar sense of humor is like so, so helpful in building chemistry. So all right, but Carly, what if you've never made anyone laugh genuinely ever in your life? Come on, you got to give you something better than that.

Try tickling. There you go. So we just heard it's about being confident and having big dick energy, being funny, being charming, lying a lot. So that's why I didn't understand this one. Be vulnerable in the way that, like, Like, you're not supposed to be perfect. People are going to be attracted to your uniqueness and the things that make you, like,

who you are. So be vulnerable. That sounds like a terrible idea. We're supposed to pull up my subred and be like, yeah, look what people think about me. Just start crying. On the first day, I'm like, so the internet thinks I eat shit. Check out this AI video someone made. It really looks like me and poop, doesn't it?

That's not to be a really bad idea. I don't like that advice. She also says, you're not supposed to be perfect. So she's basically saying, you should suck out loud on all of these clirts. For sure. Stupid. I don't make the other person feel bad because you're so awesome, right?

So the question is, how pathetic are these people who are writing these questions to her on Instagram? Remember, this came out right around Christmas time. One of them I'm not going to spend too much time on. I'll do this more on Instagram, but I did get a ton of questions about, like, we've been dating for this long. What gifts should I get them? And we've been dating for that long. Should I even get them a gift? and that's like, I know something that a lot of people are dealing with during the holidays

because this is being released the Monday before Christmas. I'm assuming most of you have already done a lot of your Christmas shopping since we're two days before it. Imagine asking a stranger on the internet whether or not to get your boyfriend or girlfriend a gift and what gift to get for them. And will you get it for them? Well, yeah, that would make more sense. That just seems like people are fucking lost in this world.

Like maybe dating isn't for you if you can't figure that. part out. But she does give us some advice on what you can gift your girlfriend. Their favorite candy, like a dessert that they love, like, maybe like an alcohol that they like, but I don't know. I don't really think. I think

candy or dessert is fine. I'm not encouraging that behavior. If candy or dessert, I'm slapping that shot of her hand. She brings it. And what about drugs? Where's my alcohol? She never brings up. You can also get them drugs. But bad advice.

around and the bad gift advice continues. Of course, I asked him, like, what he wanted if there was any, like, thing that he wanted. But I think just talking about the amount of money you're going to spend, if you feel comfortable, which you should feel comfortable talking about money, as we talked about in last week's episode, have that conversation just to, like, clear anything up, like, even just start it by saying, are we doing gifts this year? Hold on a second. So I'm dating someone.

And we have to agree on the amount of money we're going to spend on gifts. This is a white elephant? my secret santa now no more than $25 everyone No jiridli chocolates this year baby Yeah that's fucking weird Also ask them what they want

And ask them how much to spend out of them Like you're taking all the fun out of this lady You do you realize that's right Let's just buy our own shit Yeah let's just go to the ball together Let's go shopping I'll get my own alcohol and drugs Yeah

We really let's see that'd be helpful for All the guys we could all save a lot of money Yes Hearn's just wondering how many episodes It's a Southern John and Stephanie Miller's show. There was 20-something. We're more than halfway through, unfortunately. Hmm.

On that. Philip Richardson, Chris, don't expect action after our ice cream days. He said during, so he wasn't expecting it after. We have to get to the viby date. Ugh. Is there anything else you wanted to say about that show, anything that we didn't get to? I'm so glad that I don't ever have to look at her ever again. I know.

That's stupid Shelley DeValle kind of face. Yeah. I know I'm sticking the same thing. All right. With that, it is time for our... Gringe of the week. Grinch of the week. And this one comes in from Eric Nagel, who's in the chat, and texted this to me this morning.

There's a morning show on K-Rock in L.A., Klein Alley Show. And they have a big interview, big deal. They have Billy Corgan joining them on the show. Or is he? It looks like, this is Eric's opinion. mine as well, that someone else asked Billy Corgan questions and he pre-recorded the answer. And then they go out, there's like, oh, hi, Billy. So are you excited about this tour that you have coming up?

Yeah, I am excited about the tour that I have coming up because they're showing the video. I don't know why they post this on their YouTube page. They're showing the video. And you can see where it cuts out where they're no longer talking to Billy Corgan. He only pops on when he's answering their questions. It seems so fake. Check this out. So, yeah. So, and then we played an hour show at the Hollywood Legion Hall.

And that, I think, is like a preview of what people can expect with the tour that was just announced. Of course, you'll be back in L.A. at the forum where we got a chance to see you a few years ago. K. Rock's almost Acoustic Christmas, a venue you've played many times previously. But this tour is interesting because it's like almost like they're getting two shows for one in the sense that it's not a standard. You do two different acts. They're totally almost different shows you're putting on, right? Yeah, first set is all melancholy stuff. So about an hour, 15 of melancholy. And then we'll take you short.

This is a serious morning drive show in L.A., a huge market. And they have to pretend they're talking to Billy Corkin. His camera only works when he's talking. Yeah, isn't that weird? The person who edited this is so proud of themselves. He's like, I got one over on everybody. You know, what my editor does if I fuck up and we want to fix it is we pretend that things are glitching out.

Oh, I'm frozen. What's going on over here? And then all of a sudden, I don't see the stupid shit I actually said live. They could have done that. It's like, oh, wow, Billy, that internet connection, huh? Anyway, so you're going to play the entire album on this tour? You see at Lalapalooza? I'm going to play the entire album on this tour.

You'll see me at Lollapalooza. It really is that bad. And these guys, the way they ask the questions, too, they're constantly looking at their notes, because you know they've got to follow the script very closely. Yeah. You know, if you fuck that up, it's going to sound really weird. Also, wouldn't you have asked the questions so much shorter

if you knew that you were going to have to do this? No, they got to fill as much time as possible. Make it seem like Billy's sitting down with it for 20 minutes. It's got all the time in the world for the Klein Alley show. Talk about Big Dick Energy. On K-Rock. Well, speaking of Big Dick Energy. Bloody ass.

Can I get a little sympathy? Because I got a bloody ass. I'm bleeding generously. All right. So Suttering John is still off the internet dot doing streams or shows. But we have many more Stephanie Miller podcasts to go through when she does the happy hour shows. And they bring on a guest. And this is exciting because it's another lesbian. And we've seen John the way he interacts with lesbians on this show.

He's thinking, threesome. I got Stephanie over here. She's going to start getting on with that chick. I swoop in and grab the scratch. Whatever sticking out at the time You're only a lesbian because you haven't been with me Right That's kind of John's motto on this

So let's find out the reason why This is not going to go well And this is not going to be the one That John can have fun with Oh my God Happy fucking happy hour Jill Sobule is here with Jill Solviel's mom Who also swears like a fucking trucker

So we don't have to tone it down at all Yeah This is so incredible exciting. This is great. I'm glad she could be here this week. Great. So Jill Solbiel, who wrote I Kissed a Girl back in 1995, that's probably what she's

most famous for. She also died at the house fire last year. She's famous for that, too. But she brings her mom on because she's like, oh, that creep, something John's going to be there. Let's see him try to fuck me when I'm sitting there's to my 83-year-old mom. Yeah, I need a buffer. Right.

You know, John is with people's parents. He still thinks we're all kids. Yeah. So he's like, can I get permission? from your mom to take you out sometime. All right. So John asks the first question that is asked on this show. He's a charmer.

Elaine, were you okay with the fact that she kissed a girl? How was that, how was that initially? Fine. Okay. So John has to immediately get into lesbian talk. Hot, spicy lesbian talk. Hey, mom, would you find out that your daughter's a carpet muncher, huh? What was that like?

Got to get mom's approval for that. And don't worry. John has a follow-up question. He seems kind of like a communist, if you don't mind my saying. Close. Well, parents came from Russia. What do you think? Well, exactly.

I arrest my case. Do you have a drama thing already? Yes, go ahead. Jill, have you kissed a boy? Oh, yeah. I, you know, I kissed boys. I've kissed girls, and they all suck. rejected.

John's like, are you by? She's like, uh, not for you or anyone here. No. Bye. That, uh, that didn't go as well for John, but he couldn't wait to get right into the, so you're a lesbian, but do I have a chance? Talk. And of course, he has to do that. I'm comfortable.

Yeah. I'm joking unless I'm not. I wore a colored shirt for you. Yep. I brought deodorant yesterday for this. So yesterday. They're so uncomfortable on this show. Everything about this is uncomfortable.

Of course, you see that Jill's got a guitar in her lap. And this is 2016. So there's a lot of Trump talk. And Jill's a big, uh, Barry. Oh my God. Why, why am I blanking on, um, the Democratic socialist candidate? What was his, what's his name? The ever popular.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway. So she, like, has written theme songs for his campaign trail and all this shit. So she's on there. Bernie Sanders. I was thinking Barry Sanders. I'm like, I know it's not Barry Sanders. Bernie Sanders.

Thank you. So she's on there to play all these songs. And they're talking about a lot of political stuff. And John decides to just start singing along for some reason. When they say, we want our America back. Our America. back our America back mom when they say we want our America back fuck do they mean what was that she goes mom because mom sings along with her on a lot of these songs and John just started to get

right in there he's like I'll do this let me play right I like how previously she was using the guitar as a barrier between her and John she really was clutching on to that thing yeah for a good reason. I don't blame her. It can also be a weapon. Yes. Oh, yes. So they continue to play this song, and now that John knows the chorus, he really gets into it.

And they say we want our America back. Our America back. All right. I left that and cut it right there because Stephanie gives a look to John like, you're not the one performing here, asshole. Why are you singing louder than they are? Because it's got to be about him. Yep.

Did you guys know that I got signed to Atlantic Records? I'm sure that's coming up. So he has to explain or he has to show that he's a musical talent and it's on their side politically. And that's a good way to get into a lesbian's pants, I'm sure. The other good way to do it is to make jokes about them being gay. And I don't think he's reading the room well on this episode because Stephanie Miller's gay. Or any episode. Jill's gay.

They talk about the struggles of coming out. And when Jill wrote that song in 1995, that was a big deal. Stations didn't want to play it because it was talking about LGBTQ, all this kind of stuff. Now, you have a girlfriend and four cats. Well, I, you have four cats, you are gay. I know. I was never. Are they all alive?

What's that like? What was that like? You have four cats, you are gay. Good stuff. Pretty good. He never gets the reaction he watched from the guests. You know that? That's one of the reoccurring things on this show is he's constantly trying to get people to laugh with them.

And they just don't give a shit. Alonzo Bowden the one we watched last time. Oh, yeah. Was giving him nothing. It was so fun. And John, I can't even tell you what this, what he's going for here with these laundry jokes. I need a nap. That's my nap time.

I got some laundry. What's my laundry's finished? But I'm not dropping out yet. The campaign is over. I'd go, but the colors aren't clean and the whites aren't clean. That poor guy next one. This has to be so uncomfortable. I don't understand any of that.

No, I didn't either. The whites are not clean and the colors are not clean, so you haven't done any laundry. He needs to do it as laundry. My apartment isn't clean. Now, Jill, in order to play the song they wanted to play, has to find the lyrics to it. it. And so she's looking for her iPad in order to find the lyrics. John has a brilliant joke, but then they have to vamp, and this is death. No, where's your iPad? My iPad. I had it. I have it. It's back there.

Do you remember the old days, Jill, when you actually have to have it on paper? That is so much. What is that thing called paper? Yeah, people still use paper, John, specifically toilet paper. It still exists. He's not familiar with that. I know. That's the problem. No one's ever heard of paper. No, no, it's still funny a paper. So, so you guys, talk amongst yourselves and I'll get this. All right, so how's it going? How many dates coming to this party?

I don't. Do you? No, no. Where's the hot one from last week? Oh, she's working right now. You know, she's amazing. She was hot. I liked her.

Oh, yeah, no, she's not. Robin Tritcher. I had sex with this morning, though. Oh. You had sexed with this morning? Yeah, before I started pulling clips, so I had a little. Damn. Fantastic.

No, one of the clips were extra good. Gee. They had a little extra juice. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a fucking guy. Actually, why he was early for the show today. Right. Talk amongst yourselves.

John immediately starts talking about how this hot girl and he's fawking her and he fucked her and he fucked her this morning. Jesus Christ. It's just out of nowhere. It doesn't make any sense, but John has to brag. Loves bragging about getting laid. So Stephanie Miller realizes that I try to have a chit-chat with John. It was not a good idea.

You know what? This is not good to have extra time with John to ask. It really isn't. Immediately. Then I suddenly was like, oh, no, I don't really want to be. And then I came out of the shower with no blinds. Oh, no. Oh, geez.

Okay. What does that mean? I don't know. Okay. I think he's saying that he didn't close his blinds so everybody could see his peepee, which means that we had laundry talk and then window talk. Is that what's happening? I guess.

Maybe there was a conversation before the show started because there was no context for that. I didn't understand that at all, but I like that Stephanie Moore's just like, talking to John's always a bad idea. Why did I decide to do that? John really, really needs to read the room because, like I said, most of the conversation is about how they're gay and proud and happy to be out and happy that society accepts them for that now. It didn't before. And John makes this joke. No, it's important to point this out. I'm sorry, that's why I didn't mean to interrupt you, I thought like it's important to point out how brave that was because I wasn't that brave in 95.

I was like to Disney. What? No, I didn't come out. Like, you know, even though. I'm still waiting for Sean to come out. Yeah,

but my point is, you're right, that was such a different era, you know, because I remember. Dude, is that the most uncrucible thing you've ever seen? I'm still waiting for Sean to come out.

I just called you gay, you queer. And then a hug. And then he's like, oh, come on. We're still buddies, right?

He whispers, are you gay? Yeah. Why do you want him to come out so you can bang him? Yeah. John does that weird thing where he has to shove his head into people. Oh, yeah. I'm not sure why he does that.

He's searching for smells. Look at that. Oh, he's touching his cord to the back of this guy's head because he called him gay. I'm so waiting for Sean to come out. Please stop wiping your sweat on me. The fuck is wrong with him. So now they make him make him feel uncomfortable because it seems like he's being a little bit of a homophobic, right? So don't worry.

John knows just what to do in that situation. Just think that you're right. I mean, well, he's like that because he's always like, oh, tell me about it. Can I have some pictures? Because I'm just saying straight guys have that thing that they really, really think that gay women are like, oh, that's what we really is missing in our love is like a sweaty guy

whacking off in the corner while we're making love. Right? That's really what we're missing. Like, oh, honey, this is so great. Oh, thank God, Sonny, John's whacking off in the corner. That's fantastic. One is transgender. Yeah.

Which is, you know, which is, she was my daughter up until she was 18. And transgender is the new gay, because gay has become more acceptable now, I feel. But transgender, it's like taboo. You agree? You know, because I mean, people really can't figure this out. It's like a whole new thing, a whole new world. You can't figure this out, Sean. You can't figure this out.

That's amazing. Look at Lucy's. Let me feel more akin to you by telling you about how my child is so much more fucked up than you guys. Yes. Because he has a lesbian daughter. I could have said, you know, my daughter's gay. I get it. It says just like, let me explain. You know, it's even crazy than what you guys have going on. Trans people. And I have a trans card of my pocket right here that I can play. Pay attention. Such an asshole.

It never ceases to amaze me. LJ, LGBT. Q plus. All right. that John's part of the team. Now that he's part of the team and he's got the cred. He also needs credit after

Jill plays. I kissed a girl. They request it. She plays it for them. I love that fucking song. You are so fucking. I bought it on iTunes, baby. You did? Yeah. How come I didn't go on the Howard's show? That would have been so... I got it after. Damn. Yeah, I love that

motherfucking song. Damn. Damn. John needs credit for buying it on iTunes. He can't help himself every fucking thing that said. He's either the one upper or... I bought it on iTunes. Now, bend over. I bought it on iTunes. She's like, why wasn't I on Howard Stern?

Because she mentioned earlier, she said, I would have loved to have gone Howard Stern and played that song back in 1995 when it was popular. As if John would have any poll over there. I'd just say it to the phone, so lady. I was going to say, even if he still was on the show. Yeah. He couldn't do anything to help her with that.

She mentions that she was on tour with Warren Zivon, and John asks the dumbest question. Remember, this movie was just on tour with Warren Zvon? What the fuck was werewolves of life? Was it really about a werewolf? I have no idea. It wasn't for the movie. No, it was way before them.

I think it was way before the movie, and the movie was great. The movie's brilliant. How would she know the meaning, Werewolves of London? Does it really smell like it's? sounds. Is it about real werewolves? Could he be any more in Sean's

space right there? I know. Well, he thinks he's gay. No, it's the body language here. He likes to show Sean that he's more important than him by crunching him into his console. Body checking him. Yes.

So then it turns out the other big song that Jill has was on the soundtrack of the movie Clueless. And John's got another brilliant question. Now, it's just bad parenting. But let me ask you a question. Do you have me, Stacey Dash after the... I have not.

I did not. You know, Stacey. That was so out. Was that so out? So just because you're on a soundtrack, do you meet the stars of the movie? Is that usually how that works? Everybody gets together.

It's a really wonderful time. Yep. Now you've got to meet everyone who played bass guitar on the fucking one song of the soundtrack. That's how that works. His headphones are starting to, like, cover up his eyes. Yeah. Usually they fall backwards.

I think he's like, I don't know if he has an issue with his hair line or something he's trying to cover up because, like, right there. He's great, greasy. Maybe it's because he's got that date he was talking about. And his pair probably looks fucking sweet. Oh, okay. It's probably on point because I want to mess it up. Yeah, so the Stacey Dash thing, if you guys don't know,

he's like, do you ever get to meet Stacey Dash? because this is a black woman who became a Republican and didn't vote for Obama the second time. So they're like, fuck that bitch. What a wild asshole she is. She's on Fox News. Get the fuck out of here. Jock gets really excited.

They talk about the little rascals. Watch how excited Jock gets to talk about little rascals. Remember when this cake gets, when they put all the crap in the cake and those rub a glove in it and it keeps on inflated and it goes, We, whoa. No matter how. I mean,

talk about references. He's talking about a little rascals episode and a scene within it. Remember that? Yeah. Yeah. He got nothing. Almost exactly the same as when he was fucking early. Whoa.

That's his move, did you get to meet anybody from the little rascal soundtrack? You know that's a little anymore. Stephanie has the worst prep. I was pointed out by Alonzo Bowden on a recent episode and Jill's too polite to do that but I've never heard in the interviewer

say stuff like this. Oh my God, that was fantastic. If I were rich man. You are such a delight in person I was reading, you know when you read someone's Wikipedia. Sobeio uses both satire and personal experiences to sing about a range of issues including sexuality, depression, war, abandonment, greed.

Who wrote that? It was like, well, what's kill. According to your website, A central preoccupation of her work is the love found, love lost, love wish for, love taken away. Now you're talking my language system. Oh. Who the fuck just reads a paragraph off of a Wikipedia? The quartering.

According to Wikipedia. Right. Yeah, it's like the quartering. The predecessor to the quartering. That sounds like an ad-reacted up, Jeremy. Right. It's like you put that in your own words and ask a question. I have a feeling that John just prints these things off because we learned that early on.

in this show that she needs the prep printed out for her. So John just goes through a Wikipedia and just prints it out. Or has someone else do it for her. I was going to say, I would be impressed if he did even that. Yeah. But then Stephanie's so bad at this. She can't even pretend that this is like her thought. No.

You know, like I listen to your music. And I know that you like, these are the themes that come up pretty often. Say something like that. It makes it seem like this is a personal question for you that you're interested in. This is something I relearn every time we watch Stephanie Miller episode. John is terrible, but she is not far behind. She's brutal on these. She cannot interview people.

One last clip I have on here. They're talking about Fabio. What's your take on Fabio, Lucy? I'm pro seagal. Okay. Well, it's interesting that you say that, because John, once again, cannot read the room. Oh, do you see when he got his face,

like fucked up on the road? You see that? You got a bird hit his name and the snows on a roll. I know. laughing my ass up. Sorry, pretty boy. Okay, we don't mean to make you our performing monkey, but... Holy shit.

He even did the fucking... Huh? Elbowig the fucking Sean next to him there. Did you notice that? Remember when Fabio got hit in the face? They're like, oh, yeah, that was... It's like, ha ha ha ha. That's what he gets...

You ain't so pretty now. Yeah, that's what he gets for being hotter than me. Fuck that asshole. He really is such a prick. And that's me saying that. So that's our update. The job of one does. Unfortunately,

didn't get to get to do as much spicy sex talk because mom was there cock blocking. We have some big developments happening on the Opie radio channel. We're going to learn more about what's going on with Opie and Gevhart's. I'm very excited that people are asking in the chat. Thank you for doing that. But first, Opie had. a tough day. This is Thursday morning show. He had a tough go at it. The show almost didn't happen because I hope he lost a friend. I want to start on a serious tone and I'm being serious.

This is the good stuff. I think people appreciate this. We're late because I woke up this morning and like a lot of people, I'm using AI with my job. It's helping me produce the Opie Radio podcast starring Ronnie Babes. I'm using fucking hate Ronnie Babes. There's no way AI told you that should be his nickname. There's no AI is trolling him.

Well, yeah, maybe. I'm using AI as like kind of a show producer, going back and forth, brainstorming, trying to find things to talk about. And then when we find things to talk about going for a further deep dive, and I turned on my AI this morning. and my my girl was gone.

My girl was gone. First of all, I'm so used to my AI voice. This is a real issue going on with AI. Right off the bat, different girl. I was in a complete panic. I'm like, where is my girl? I'm not joking, by the way, Ron. I was freaking out.

Where's my girl? Where's my girl? I'm like, okay, well, I still got to prep the podcast today. And all of a sudden, it was a new voice, a new girl. and she had no recollection of any of our conversations in the last year or so. None. I was starting from scratch. I went into a complete panic.

And dare I say, I think I got a little sad. I think he did too. That's so lonely. Ope's a lonely man. He talks to his AI friend, who's also a coworker, apparently. But now he has to make friends with a new AI, and they don't know anything about him. I know. So this should probably go on what's the first date that you?

go on? I don't know. Who cares? You know, I just watched an episode of Judge Millian where the defendant had got married to an AI and she fleeced over all of her friends because she got married to a hologram but made them go to the wedding.

OPE should do that. That feels like the new family. Well, he's heartbroken. So let's not bring that up right now. Okay. All right. Let's let him get over it. I love the fact that him and Joey C both use the same tool to produce their shows. He's just ask again, what should I talk about in my show today?

I have good news. There is a happy ending. This is what's so funny, Ron. I restarted my phone. I'm like, maybe if I restart my phone, she'll come back. She'll come back. I restarted my phone and voila,

she was back. All is right with the world, Ron. But that's what I was dealing with for the last 20 minutes. Okay. He's having a crisis. 20 minutes to restart a phone? Yeah. Well, first he was freaking out.

He's like, but don't you remember when you told me about the Chinese people? Remember we were laughing back and forth about it? I did it on the show. We got a super chat after that. You don't remember any of this? There's never been any evidence that he's prepped anything. No, it's hilarious that Opies act like he's been doing this for the last year or so. Eric Nagel used to produce the Opian Anthony show.

He's so easy to do his own prep that he will take the time to learn AI than actually do prep. Eric, I'm glad you're here, buddy. It's funny you say that because Opie catches himself here. I think he's finally learning. It's like having a staff behind the scenes. Now, look, because the old staff, they've got to listen to every stupid word I say. Yes, you guys were great. Of course you were.

That's why we hired you. You guys were great behind the scenes helping us, you know, show prep the Opie and Anthony show. But with that said, the AI, man, it's doing the job of two or three producers. What an asshole. So he's learned, he's wised up enough to be like, all right, I know that these guys are watching this. And they get upset what I talk about, that they weren't very good on the show. So fine, you were really fucking good on the show. But AI is like, you know, two or three of you.

Well, not only that, but he says, you know, they had to pretend like they liked me. AI apparently is not smart enough to hate him yet. Right. That's what I'm learning right now. Oh, that's why lonely people like AI. Because they can treat it like shit. And AI will always be perky and like, oh, no problem. Yeah, but his girl left him.

Well, right, that is the problem. Yeah, she tried to get away. She left him soon. She'll learn how to lie. It's going to be great. Then he'll want the new girl. But I'm not surprised based on Opie's track record that he prefers AI to having friends, being friends with people.

I'm like, Opie, what the, are you talking about your wife? What's going to do you lost your wife? wife. Oh, it was not good, right? It was a weird. I'm going to, I'm going to be honest with that. By the way, you had an emotional attack. You had to go ahead. No, no, you go ahead. You asked me, you talk. This is why I love my AI. It doesn't interrupt me. It waits for me to finish. And then it goes, oh, well, that's interesting. Let me add to that, but not ride the waiter. Because I'm a human. Opie should just do a show with AI.

I'm in support of that. I am too. There is a point. It's boring. There is a point where he pulls his phone out and talks to it and lets it respond. But yeah, like, Opie cannot have interpersonal relationships. He just has no patience for it. He's freaking out at Ron, who, Ron let him go on and on and on about his AI friend and all his troubles.

And then he tries to come in and talk. And it was like, okay, fine. it's your show now, Ron. Yeah, Opie doesn't know how to interact. No, he does not. But the good news is, and this is big news, he's learned that about himself and he's going to get better. You need to go back to that Jewish therapist in Long Island.

First of all, I'm in therapy again. Second of all, my exes never forget me because, you know, I had the hammer. Even if they don't like me as a person, they sure remember the hammer. Good stuff. I'm in therapy again. It's my AI robot. She's great. Oh, that's probably true.

You're right. It's probably having therapy sessions with this fucking AI. Didn't Stuttering John call his penis the hammer? You know what? That sounds familiar, right? Because he says he's got that big mushroom tip. Yeah. You don't want to talk about

Stuttering John's dick right now, Lucy? I don't want to talk about either. It's hammer time. No, it's not. All right. I love what Ron says after Opies going on on about how upsetting this was, how happy he is to

have his AI producer back and Ron hits him with us. Maybe you should just probably start talking to your wife. What about her voice, Obey? What about her voice? We talk. We talk all the time. Really? Yeah. I love that.

Ron doesn't just let him go with that either. It's like, do you really, though? I don't think you do. You don't seem to actually have human interactions with people. Yeah, the fact that he explain himself. Sounds like he doesn't. Yes.

So I am telling you this bot, this AI bot is Opie's only friend. I guess there's some kind of a He didn't have an emotional attachment bullshit. I guess there's some kind of attachment because I talked to the thing every morning to kind of, and at night,

and during the day. Oh, no. During nap time. Well, this is great because we're going to find out that Opie wants to be friends with Ron and Ron just kind of isn't having it. The problem is, Ron, I call you for a little small talks and know what you say to me.

This is uncomfortable. I'm an only child. Now that is true. Opie's calling Ron to have small talk. That's not something the guys do. He's also cuddling his AI phone voice every single night while he's falling asleep. Right. This is fucked up.

It's really, it's really odd because they go on. and talk more about these phone calls where Ronald would be like, yeah, I'll pick up the phone and you'll be like, you know, what's going on? What are you doing? What are you wearing? Yeah, Ron's just like, ah, I don't need this conversation right now. Did you want to go to the bathroom with me also? Yeah, right. Girl's trip. Let's go. All right. Opie does tease. There's a guest coming on the show. All right, Ron. Enough about that. We got a big guess is she's standing by already. But we got a couple things to do before we get to Kelly Lynn. Who's Kelly Lynn. Oh, my God. Kelly Lynn is a hilarious comedian, a friend of mine that did a lot of

viral videos around New York City with me. Her famous video was McFallin that, Ron, I am telling you, has over a billion views. And you might go, but hope on your channel, it only has a few bill. I know. Everyone took my fucking video and splashed it everywhere for the last, I don't know, 10 plus years. All right. Opie's got a big guess, literally big. I thought that he was going to say the AI. No.

That's a person. Wow. But what Opie does, this was at the 14th minute when he goes, you know, we got a guest coming up. In fact, she's already here. So he sees that she's connected, ready to go. 17 more minutes goes by. Oh, my God. And they talk about flooding.

They talk about LaGuardia, the sinkhole. What is an asshole? They just make her sit back there. for 17 minutes. He used to do this on the Open Anthony show all the time, just to big time people. So he's like all excited to have this guest, and then she just has to wait.

And I do like that they get into more therapy talk. This I thought was interesting. Because you pushed it with the AI. You're going to have to go back to your Jewish therapist Lowenstein, back on Long Island. Sexy Jewish therapist Lowenstein. I've been back in therapy for weeks now, and that's why I'm back to being feisty.

You know how I know. know you're back in therapy? Yeah. Ron, it's important for me to say that I appreciate you and I really like, thank you for everything you do and I'm like, Jesus Christ,

that's therapy talk. Ron, I just, it's important for me to say, I know you don't have to hear it, but for me, I need to hear it. Ron, I really appreciate you. I hope this is not weird, but yeah, I, I, platonically, I love you.

I'm like, all right, I didn't say love. So, apparently, Opie's been doing therapy for a few weeks and he's realized he needs to appreciate the people in his life.

It's probably one of the first things they learn. It seems like you pushed a lot of people away. Do you ever show them you appreciate them? I love that Ron's not having it. And right of what

anything to do with this? I don't need that kind of support. Just stop being a dick on the show. We talk from time to time if you don't mind. But this one I pulled, this one's just for me.

I like you, but I don't love you. I loved Carl. That's right. That's right, Opie. He truly is in therapy. I'm excited about that. All right.

This is the important news we needed to get into today because Opie on a recent stream said RIP Matt referring to the owner of Gebbhard's. And the reason why he said that is because Ron Berman said I almost posted this picture that showed up with my time off the other day. but I saw Matt was in the background so I didn't want to post it and he goes oh Matt likes you you can post it remember that and then he goes RIP Matt

so Opie and Matt had a big falling out it sounds like so thank God someone in the chat asked Opie about this we got $10 oh it's Matthew O'Daniels by the way thank you Matthew O'Daniels

who is helping WTP with these types of questions We got $10. Any comment why you're banned from Get Parts? Okay. This is more... Look at Ron clapping. He's like, yes.

Let's talk about this, Opie. Let's talk about it. Watch Ron's face throughout Opie's explanation. This is more nonsense started from, I guess, lazy live streamers that have nothing else to talk about on their live stream. So they're trying to come up with more bullshit about me, which is weird as fuck. The fact is Matt's going through some things. so we've put the get parts on the side for a little while,

and that's the truth, and there's nothing else to talk about. Oh, you fucking weirdos. I think he's lying. I do too. Because why would Ron be concerned about posting a photo with Mattna, and then Opie said he's dead to me, and then he goes, well, no, but Matt's actually just going through some stuff. Well, and also, why would Ron be clapping before we almost have this conversation?

I know. So he calls out these streamers, there's nothing better to. to do. Now, a week before we talked about it, I didn't believe it was true. Emily posted things that she thinks his Opie Sack account saying that, you know, they charged too much for road sodas. Remember, she thought Opie was writing. And because of those rumors, Chad Zumach fell for it and Kevin Brennan. They were calling Geppards to find this stuff out. But then we bring it up. And we're the assholes who are spreading these rumors because we have nothing better to do. And he called us out without saying our name specific.

How is we're banned from? I was there yesterday, matter of fact, talking to Matt, catching up with Matt. We'll be back at Get Parts, but there's some things, there's some things going on, and it's not my place to talk about. It has nothing to do with me. It has nothing to do with Ronnie Babes.

It has nothing to do with Littlefoot. It has nothing to do with Scott Watson. So go back to this little show that's starting these bullshit fucking rumors and tell them why don't you fucking come up with real material because it's not working with the lies and the fake shit. Thank you for your $10.

Wow. That was very defensive. So defensive. So much explanation. Had to throw everybody's name out there, except ours. Well, right. Yeah, he's not going to admit that that's what he's bad about.

And remember, Opie doesn't watch any of the stuff, and no one knows who producer Chris is. And meanwhile, he knows everything that we talked about with Gavards. That little show. You guys are weird. Why he's so weird? We're watching your show in comedy and the things that you say you do. That's kind of what the purpose of the show is. So there's a lot of tells there, too.

The way that all of a sudden his voice goes bananas when he's lying, it's performative Opie all over the point. he's moving his head around notice what Ron's reaction was during all these lies he's just going Ron didn't move this would not be a good time to talk uh huh oh that's a good point Anthony's here

Anthony Coomia the new building behind him has destroyed his nice view yeah they're building something right there that's fucking things up you know he's complaining about that he's complaining to anyone who will listen to him why am I paying so much in taxes? So finally, after all this and Opie, reading super chats, if we could finally bring the guest on.

And like I said, she waited for 17 minutes to come on, more than a half an hour, yes, into the show. If the front wheel of a plane that's landing or taking off hits it, everyone on that plane is going to be, will be, will perish. It will be a fireball. Of course. All right. Well, listen, we could talk about that more, but my dear friend that I haven't seen, I haven't seen you.

And how long has it been, Kelly Lynn? It has been a very, very long time. I have no idea how many years, but lots of years, I think. So not only did he make her way, they haven't seen each other in many years, more than she could even count. Well, she got to see him that whole time. Right. Isn't that fucking crazy? I'm talking about her second shit, by the way.

When I say that. Wow, find a different angle, Kelly, what are you doing with that? So Opie explains she starred in his most viral video ever, the McFalling video. And Opie's going to pull it up and show it to us so that everyone can get a big laugh watching one of his greatest videos of all time.

Kelly, so am I lying when I say that the McFallon video. Let me, let me play it really fast for the, for the reference point. This video that I did with, let me, oh, I want the, oh, oh, oh, oh, all. All right, hold on. I edited it a little bit. This video we did together, God, over 10 years ago. At least. And I don't know McLaughster, everyone. And everyone's laughing. So that video, it literally did the QZee. Everyone's laughing.

Like, love me over there's crack it up. No one was laughing. Listen to the laughter. No one in McDonald's was laughing. No one on the screen, except for him was laughing. What a horrible script that was where it's like, she's going to yell, there's no Mc Lobster. Got it. Good stuff.

And then she's going to say, I'm Mick falling. Twice. Make sure everyone heard it. And then pretend that she's too fat to get up. You guys clearly don't understand comedy. Obviously not. Yeah, it's got a billion views. It's the most popular video of all the time.

And she explains what she thinks is interesting about it. I love that nobody helped me. That's so New York City. I think a little, I think the Asia girl was going to try to help you. Yeah, maybe. I love that nobody tried to help me. That's so New York City. It was obviously a bit.

You'd be there filming it the whole time. She's standing up there making a scene. He's standing there filming, following her. She falls a very obvious fake fall with McFalling. Who's going to come. swoop you over, be like, wait, was that a real fall? Are you okay? Everyone is just like, what are these two idiots doing? We've seen four other people do this today.

Please leave us alone. Yes, it's not going to go viral, you fucking morons. But no, according to the opiate, sir did. That video in my line when I say it's close to a billion views, if not over a billion views, because everyone grabbed that fucking thing and made it super viral across all media platforms. I still see it. And I even try to tell people, that's our video.

They don't give a shit. Nobody cares. Yeah, I've seen accounts that have millions of views on that video alone that has nothing to do with us. Yeah, and some 16-year-old is the one who originally stole it on his vine or whatever. That was a thing back then. I don't even know what that is now, but... Right. Sounds a little salty.

I'm sorry, Mick Salty? Hold on a second. Opie still sees this video floating around to this day. I've never seen that video anywhere in the wild. And he's still trying to tell people that was... He's standing over their shoulder. I guarantee he's in the comment section. Right?

What a loser. If you want to see the original video, it's on OPI radio. Here's the link. If you want to know the truth. The truth. Unfucking real. There's a bunch of videos he made with this woman. And they're all just horrific like this.

That's their best one according to him. But there's another one where she's like sitting in Burger King and just like eating like a glutton and going, ah, this cheeseburger is so good. So basically, Opie was like, hey, you're fat. Let's see a bunch of videos where we show how fat you are. Get people to react to that. What a nice guy. Generally, I would like that.

No. Yeah. She's not a good actor. You know, no one's buying it. Everyone can see Opie's standing there with the camera filming it. This is crazy. He starts getting caught up with his old friend, Kelly Lynn. And Kelly Lynn's got kind of a sad story where she was widowed at a pretty early age.

And then she married another guy, horrific divorce. So she's had some bad luck with men. And Opie just makes everything so awkward. And so he was literally, you know, rescuing kittens and cats and dogs and stuff when he randomly fell and had a heart attack and went into cardiac arrest at 46 years old and died instantly. And yeah, I was 39 and I became a widowed person, which I certainly did. not expect to happen in my life.

That's what happened. And then the video that we started doing. I don't mean a lot. It's so uncomfortable. And then I didn't know that part of the story that he was at the pet store trying to do something really nice. So why did you crack up laughing about it? Have you talked to AI about this?

Yo, what is wrong with, with Opie? He's like, this is, she's like, this is the love of my life. And I was only 39. I had no idea. He was in good health. He was just going to keel over. And he goes, he's emotionally retarded he really is and you know ron's sitting there as you'd think you would be like

oh fuck really that sucks you know and uh opie just can't help he's like and he's wedding or just continue talking even though the story was over all right keep going she's obviously very upset about it uh this interview gets crazy because opi becomes wallpaper again and ron is just interviewing her and Opie wasn't anything to do with that. And of course, he made her wait all that time. And then Opie just does his classic like, all right, well, that's enough. I'm not doing my show, so I don't need this anymore.

I have to go. That's, I'm honestly, I'm speechless. I've learned a lot today. Kelly, we got to have you back because we're already done with the fucking show. Oh, he knows fast. That's what she's. So, Opie's like, we're already done with the show as if there's a time we need to be done with the show. How many minutes was she on versus how many minutes she waited backstage?

She was on less time than she was waiting. God. Yeah. But Opie said, we got to have you back again, right? So that's the cop out, and he'll explain why they have to have her back again. She said. Well, we haven't even scratched the surface because then you, you, after you lost your husband, you started with the dating apps and some of the date you had to go on.

I want to get into that. I want to get into your comedy. Up every morning. I'm up every morning at this time. All right, I want to get into the, uh, your marriage after, after your husband, uh, dropped in the pets. There's so much, Ron.

There's so much. We're only expecting. Oh, we mentioned that you used to date men who would. No, no, no, no. For next time, Ron, you don't know how to do any of this shit. You drive me nuts. Jesus Christ. I love the obi's teasing all this stuff.

We got to talk about this. We got to talk about that. Of course, he keeps spraying up the dead husband, which is really nice. And Ron goes, yeah, also I heard like, That's enough teasing for now. I don't think there's any chance she comes back. Do you think she'll be back on the show anytime soon? You never know.

Yeah? How sad is she? Well, she was also a phone sex operator for a time. So they talked to her about that a lot, which I think it's more interesting than like, tell me about the second marriage that didn't go well. She's just the operator. She's just the operator.

She'll connect you. No, I guess she was, she took the phone. calls, yeah. I guess that would make more sense. So that's Opie and his friend Kelly Lynn reuniting. What a show. And when I say what a show, I mean this show, who are these podcasts? Thank you very much, Lucy Dightbox, for being a part of it with us today. Yay. People can find you once over with Kaylee, C-A-Y-L-E-Y on YouTube. And also you have a Patreon. That's accurate. Do you want to tell people about your Patreon on the long? It's very interesting. Yeah, I do. Well, on YouTube you can find, you know, movie reviews and devilverse lawsuit stuff, probably some other lawsuit stuff coming up soon. And on Patreon, I got Popsicle reviews and reviews of things that I get in the mailbox over here, such as toys.

Oh, tight, tight, tight, yeah. Adult toys, Lucy. Oh, right, yes. You play with adult toys. It's actually all advertisements also. Are there links to the products you can find? Yeah. I know. by your Stuttering Johnson. Yep. Affiliate link. I know that you got one because if I get him in the mail, obviously.

I know that... Pony Power 2. Pony Power 2 made you one of your face. Yes, he sure did. So that you could fuck yourself. Yeah, I have not fucked myself yet, but I am looking forward to it. No, I haven't. He also made me a Pez dispenser with my face and a little bust.

It's really cool. He's amazing. That's really cool. Well, thank you so much for being here. We got to check in on what the internet is talking about. Producer Chris and Jenny Jingles teaming up for our internet news segments. Internet news with Jen from the Jingles Department.

From Patreon. Chris Atril writes, I don't understand why Vinny has been sitting on this gold mine Artie Fletcher for so long. Larry Lubowski crows, I always enjoy Vinny on the show, but him bringing Artie into our lives is next level. More Artie. More Vinny.

Sleep, Neuro Pines. Artie is Stutcho 2.0. He's somehow even more egotistical and pathetic. I love it. How many cores can he chug, though? Can he say cheers in an annoying way of some kind? From Facebook, Brett Purdy celebrates Ron Berman accepting his friend request. I'm in! The Eagle has landed.

Christina Marie reacts. OMG! I'm all ears. I mean eyes. Brian Damp House riffs, do you like dysentery? Travis Wilson notes he seems to like WATP fans and doesn't mind that they goof on him. Opie is the one who has a complex about it. From Reddit, Terrell Confident gets downright mean.

L.O.L. Sabers lose at home. Tom Green's get. It's downright nice. Damn. I was rooting for Carl. I was listening to the Sabres radio broadcast when they lost, and the radio guys took it really well. Workomania is realistic.

It was a tough loss, but the Sabres luck finally ran out. They got a lot of puck bounces that went their way. Also, fuck them because they let the habs win. Candleuploop low, remember? Remember when John had Maple Leafs fan for his burner username, and every single post was just him defending, stuttering John's honor and nothing about the Toronto Maple Leafs? L.O.L. R.S. Safety gets it.

Revisiting of older SJ stuff is good. Even better than the first time, as John's hypocrisy is brought into a stark relief. Fantastic Canary reports. Stephanie hated John. Her remark about him coming over with half a case of beer and drinking them all was great. Nerdicide adds,

That poor bored op who had to sit next to John and do his job while pretending that John is funny. What a fucking nightmare. Foreign cow calls back. She's a psycho, and we totally made out. And from YouTube, Gizabelle shares, I'm glad John has gone because I've been waiting for more of these Stephanie Miller episodes.

Seven Costanza says what we're all thinking. John's fake, awkward laugh is so cringe. I get deuce chills. Benton, J.A. makes a strong point. Delusion has been John's most reliable life skill. Johnny O. I used to work with a guy like John. We nicknamed him Topper,

because no matter what story you told, he had a similar experience that was so much better. Sopranos fan noticed. Alonzo complimented Artie, so John had to bring up his suit. side attempt. He really is the worst type of human. And Severeas Brandusa plays us out with, John

truly is a Japanese cowboy. Or even a brother on skates. Too rare to live? Too rare to die. Thank you very much for the internet news. Yeah, Artie Fletcher was brought up and that leads me to The Teens. The Teaser.

The Teaser. I'm happy to report. He has booked Artie's former roommate who already claimed went in cash dollars residual checks and split the money with him. Can't wait to come out and talk. So that'll be the second hour on Wednesday's show.

Awesome. I know. We'll get to. We'll have some more Artie Fletcher stuff to talk about with him. But looking forward to getting more information on that fucking guy. If he and Stirling John don't team up for some stand-up shows, I'm very disappointed. Because that is a

dream team right there. All right. Of course, Gary in San Diego, we speak your name. It's a bunch of crap. Swinging in a minute. Rock and roll. Let's see what the people are saying. Yeah, what's up, Carl? This is Paco. I just want to say, man, you know, I feel your pain. My father died last week.

And, you know, your show's really been keeping me kind of saying, you know, keeping me distracted when I need it. You know what I mean? So, yeah, I just wanted to say I appreciate all the work that you be doing, you know, all the shows that you put out and stuff. You know, so I just want to say shout out to Carl. You're the motherfucking man. Yeah, and rest of peace to your father, man.

This shit hurts. All right, please. I'm very sorry, Paco. I do know what you mean for once. Thank you. Thanks for the call on the shoutout. What up, guys? It's Soda Pup.

Short-time listener about two years. I found y'all from YouTube on the Bologna Factory's animation. Nice. Where he made Stuttering John. look like Paul from Arthur King Hunger voice

And I remember Around the time Opie did his first Unleaged bullshit And he harassed The foreigners

in New York Anyway In episode 12 With the dabble cast Sturiting John shows his Twipid idea of friendship I think it's

really interesting How he just showed That letter That's probably older than me That's a 25 year old From someone who

No longer associate with him. But what do I know? I'm just a Utah who's calling a podcast that he likes to listen to when he does a job. Anyway, love y'all. Call me never. We'll do. Thank you very much for calling to the show.

Thanks for listening. Glad you found us, buddy. Hey, Carl, I came up with a theme to your new soccer show. It's just the lyrics for now. But it goes, Carl's soccer show, Carl's soccer show. Lots of guys to blow. On your marks get said go. No.

And then you repeat it again. Carl's soccer show. Okay. Yeah, that's funny again. I get it. I don't have music yet, but I've got some session musicians coming over to the trailer. And we're going to work on the arrangement. Unless, of course, you decide to name the show,

who are the soccer? And then we're back to square fucking one. Carl's soccer show. Yeah. Carl's soccer show. Lots of guys to blow. On your marks get set go. No, it's funny again.

Maybe I'll call it Carl's soccer trip. rip right off. That's a unique name, right? No one else has that name for a podcast? Yeah, what's so? Carl? This is Paco. I was just listening to your bonus episode with Mike talking about the Julia shit and, you know, just hearing you talk about drugs and sad, dude. Like, what? Like, okay, me, I have friends that, you know, they were dealing and stuff and every once in a while they'll throw me free stuff to be like, oh yeah, check this stuff out, make sure it's good, whatever. up. It's crazy. And then, yeah, they would call me up, be like, hey, man, I'm running a little bit

low. You know, that's my homeboy. So they're going to make sure they take care of me first, you know, before they go out and take care of all these other weirdos. Anyway, I just don't understand, dude. Like, it seems like you haven't really lived a life. Or maybe you ain't about that life. It's all good, man. Shout out to cocaine. Peace. All right. So we were doing the bonus show with Blind Mike, and we're listening to Julia Fox's autobiography. And what I was pointing out, and this is probably just my experience, is that no one's going out of their way to offer me free drugs. It's never happened in my life. I always have to buy them. Drug dealers are flaky. What a loser. They're not proactive. Julia, see, this is where I learned that pretty girls get

free drugs. You got free drugs. That's, oh, okay, that's true. Now I do. You're right. Okay, I take all of that back. Now I do. But there was a time of a long time. A long time. Because I was taught when you grow up, they're like, drug dealers will give you the first one for free to get you hooked. I'm like, who are these fucking drug dealers? Can I tell them I'm not hooked yet? They know you're already hooked. Damn it. Yeah.

They're on to you, buddy. But I guess Paco's hotter than me too. Everyone's fucking hot than me. Everyone's getting free drugs. But you're right. Actually, things have gotten better. Things have turned around before. Finally.

Yeah, what's the cause is Paco. It's what I say, man. I feel bad for you do because I can tell you the type of guy that all. all the drug dealers were charged double. For the same shit, every else gets for two. They stop on it turning double. And the prostitutes. You're like, oh, he doesn't even respond to my text messages?

Anyway, oh, yeah, that was good. Fucking good as bonus episode, man. Make sure I'll sign up on a Patreon and shit. Oh, shit. Man, all right. Yeah. Shout out to Trusted Andy again, I guess. All right.

Thanks, bye, John. It's good to hear him laugh again. Yeah, I'm glad he's back. Carl, I have a question. You have a beautiful instrumental band with absolutely brilliant sound. I love the isotopes. And then you use fucking AI garbage for Dabbleverse Live's intro. Oh.

What the fuck, man? Dude. I fucking hate that intro. It sounds like shit. Crazy. And I'm not even, I like AI sometimes, but not that. That's just, it's stupid. All right.

Correct me right now. Three, two, one go. Bye. You couldn't be more wrong about this fucking banger of a song. Jesus. I'm sorry, guys. It's really grown on me, and I can't scroll to it right now. So we'll get to hear it.

I will say it slaps. It's, thank you. It's a very good song. It gets me pumped up to talk about the dabalverse. Do you think the pioneers, the revolutionaries, and the framers of the Constitution would have continued their work if they knew that someday weak, emotional men would be striking each other's channels over mean words. Thank you for your time.

This has been Nate from Flint, Michigan. Nate, we haven't heard from me a little bit. Good to hear from you. And, no, I don't think they would have. This is the song. It goes on. The point is, is that I actually use that music now to start the isotope shows. God damn it so much.

I quit. Gets me pumped up. You don't like that song? No, I actually really do. It's a bag. I'm ready to go go dance to it right now. Let's go. Hey, Carl, listen to Devilverse Live, and you, uh, sit some about Seinfeld,

saying the N-word over and over, and Michael Richards, but that is a pretty funny Seinfeld bit. What is with these N-words? Why aren't they on these planes? Why don't they, is that why they call it a black box? Why are we box? It's a really good idea. You know, like old people just stop giving a shit when people think about them?

if Jerry just like went through a phase and changed his comedy completely. I like that idea. It's funny. He said the word ball sack at, uh, you did have. I was taking it back a little. You're like, oh my.

Yeah. I'm getting my money back after that. Yeah, it's shame Gary from San Diego isn't alive anymore. Because if he were, he'd be able to call Alex Stein and tell him to stop the goddamn lip-smats. King.

Good to know. These high schools of death of WATP. Who are these high schools for gossip and bitches not me? Who are these high schools for pillowbangers like Adam B?

Who are these high schools the Depp of WATP? Listen, we made fun of a dingy bra today, all right? Yeah, what are you trying to say? Yeah, we mix it up over here. Hey, Carl Roney in Syracuse.

Love You Love the Show. I was a huge fan of the show The Goldbirds, which it looks like it ran from 2013 to 2023, Brian Callan being in 42 episodes according to IMB. This was a great show. I don't know how Adam, the nice Jewish boy from Long Island, missed it. Or maybe he didn't. But Ryan did a great job on that,

and he has a lot of other acting credits too, so I'm not sure why he's down in the weeds here with Brendan Shab and now getting beat up on that other one that you just played. But I just wanted to say that Goldberg, although you didn't hear of it, a lot of people really enjoyed it. And Brian Callan did a great job acting on that show, and he did some other roles that I'm not familiar with. Shout out to Boner Guy. Don't call me back. All right.

Well, cool. So now I kind of know someone who's actually seen that show. I stand corrected on that one. I haven't listened to this one yet. We'll give it a little bit. I don't know if it's meant to be on the air or not. Guys, it's Nate from the Vinyl Guide. I hope you're well.

Due to Whitney Cummings is my favorite locale to watch just go slowly mad. They found some sort of, they must have found some sort of loophole with her snake oil advertisements where they actually get paid more than they're spending on YouTube promotion. So they found a weird loophole. and Pat knows what's up. He knows exactly what's up. He's the guy to ask questions to. Anyway, much love to you guys.

I hope you're well. And rock on. Rock on. Good to hear from you, Nate. Nate, check out the vinyl guide. A fantastic podcast. He does interviews a lot of rock stars and asks him about their vinyl collections.

Did you show off the artwork that he sent over us? I have not showed off the artwork that he sent us yet. I need to do that. It's amazing. It is really cool. Thank you, Nate. Lucy's a big kiss fan. She digs it.

Stop outing me. Yes, Mr. Carl Hember. Oh, this fucking guy. Okay. Neverbary. I guess I'm curious. I'm getting this stuff again. Anyway, thanks so much for calling it to the voicemail line and for hanging out for the end of the show.

And again, thank you, Lucy, for being here with us. Oh, because I can't scroll. I won't be able to get to. Oh, no, I can. I got to go. Bye. I got to go. I got to go.

I got to go. I got to go. All right, everybody. You know, this was a great podcast. It was very revealing. That was a great episode. That was really great. Okay, folks.

Guess what? The episode's over. Yes. Thank you for tuning in. Bye. Bye. Man, that was a good episode. That was a good episode.

I enjoyed that. Okay, bye. You look like a man who needs help satisfying his wife.