Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 129 - Aaron Gocs and Rhi Down

Episode Date: March 3, 2025

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features Aaron Gocs ((Have a) Yarn (with) Me) and Rhi Down with Jake Smith scoring!Recorded live at Good Chat Comedy Club in Brisbane!Check out Matt's stand up special: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, it is the titular Matt Stewart, just letting you know before we get into the show that I am about to be in Adelaide! March 11th to the 15th doing my new show Bad Boy, also doing a live Who Knew It with Matt Stewart. These are all at the Rhino Room and you can get tickets via mattstuartcomedy.com or you know, just find it by the Adelaide Fringe website, either way. And then doing the Melbourne International Comedy Festival as well in April at Spleen Bar. Get on over to mattstewettcomedy.com. See you in Adelaide. Cheers! If the New Year's resolution you made to read more books is not quite panning out, don't sweat it, I've got you covered. I'm Matea Roach and my new podcast Bookends is all about discovering great books and getting

to know the writers behind them. Like Brian Leo Malley, whose personal connection to Toronto helped him create the icon Scott Pilgrim. Bookends with Matea Roach is available now wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com. Welcome to Who Knew with Matt Stewart, the show where the guests write the wrong answers.

I'm the titular Matt Stewart. Our first guest is self-described as a comedy nasty gal slash mummy. It's Rhee Down. Thank you. Thank you. So good to have you on First Time Guest, Re. I know, first time guest on the live pod. Risky.

It is very risky. I've made mistakes doing live shows in Brisbane before with guest selection. I don't think a single Emma Holland episode has been releasable. No, that sounds about right. That sounds smart. Our second guest this week describes himself as a quote, comedian who likes to enjoy things. It's Aaron Gawks. That's so cute.

What the hell? That's so cute. I feel like that, I can't remember. Is that like one of my social media things? Yeah, yeah. That's your Instagram bio. Comedian who likes to enjoy things. Oh my God. What the hell, that's so cute. I feel like that, I can't remember, is that like one of my social media things? Yeah, yeah, that's your Instagram bio.

Who likes to enjoy things, oh my God. Goxie, is this also your first time on the show? I think so. Oh my God, this could be a disaster. What was, I did another one of your pods, I can't keep up with them. Yeah. There's like two of them.

This is the second one you've done, yeah, that's crazy. And our scorer tonight is, quote, the self-appointed mayor of Brisbane, Jake Smith. Hello. Hello. Not an actual political position. No. Oh, is it not?

I don't think you can if you've been to jail. It was locked up and I was never convicted. All right, so the way the show works is I ask a a relatively obscure trivia question our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer I then read their answers well as a real one and have to guess which one is correct And the first question comes from listener Jennifer well over from Marshall, Illinois You in tonight, Jennifer? Probably unlikely all right It's a few locals coming up. I hope all right first question is

What does Alan toyed mean? Oh? Do I then I send a text yes, okay, so I say nothing I just go yeah, yeah, yeah That's it. Yeah, I know there are a lot of dead air on this book podcast. Yeah. So it's always edited out isn't it? I do pay a guy to edit it out. Don't I? Fucking hell. Hey while you're writing those answers I'll explain how the scoring works. You at one point like one at a time or something. You were just like... I'm just copying... I guess why would you have known that but...

That's why you showed up to rehearsal, right? There was no rehearsal. So yeah, one point of your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant, another point if you correctly guess the answer, guessed by the other contestant, another point if you correctly guess the answer, and by the way, I'm also playing as the house. Okay. I was wondering how that would go and they chose violence tonight. I hope someone glasses you.

Real Brisbane. Love to get a bit of culture. So I put in two of my own fake answers for each question with the help of the question writers and I get a point for each one of these that I guess choose. I think of myself as the house but I think of all of us as the house so really you're booing yourselves. No I feel like some of them are on my team. Five people are on my team. How do you feel? I mean a lot

worse than I was before. Just before they booed me. And I guess that means everyone else is on team gox. The comedian who loves to enjoy things. So anyway each of us can score up to three points per round, which seems fair, but the probability actually favors me, the house. That was just my team booing you, Jason. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, most of our questions come from our great Patreon supporters. If you want to submit a question, sign up on any level via patreon.com

slash to go on pod linked in the show notes. Any patrons in tonight? My god. And even you, in tonight? Woo! Oh my god. And even you, booed? Yeah. I was with it. Oh. Not you.

Oh. You are not well liked. These are your fans, no? This is my first time doing the pod. I'm not sure what the dynamic is, but I'm slowly becoming to understand what's going's going on. All right the answer in for question number one what does allantoid mean? To find the right person who fits your genital size example small dick for tiny vagina. That's option one. Option two, a factoid about Alan. Option three, shaped like a sausage.

What? Option four, Gregory Toid's brother. Or finally, dentist. I panicked. I don't work well under pressure. I forgot to tell you this, man. Or was I not supposed to? There's an element of bluff in the game. And, yeah, if you don't, let me reveal which one you wrote.

Okay. Geez, he's good at this game. Fake, what a great fake out that was. This is why so many people are on his side. Maybe I'm double bluffing. I'm not. All right, Rhee, you want to go first? What does alantoid mean?

The genital size fit? The factoid about Alan? Shaped like a sausage? Gregory Toyd's brother or dentist? I'm just gonna go shaped like a sausage. Cause I really don't know what any of the things mean. I don't know any, I feel like I've just had a fucking stroke. You're like, what does allantoid mean? I don't know any, I feel like I've just had a fucking stroke. You're like,

what does alantoid mean? Sausage? Genitals? Fitting? A brother of Gregory? I'm like, what the fuck is this podcast? I feel fucking unsafe actually. And what do you think Oxy? Do you think dentist? Do you think dentist? Well I was gonna go more like process of elimination. Okay yeah great. I reckon the Greg's brother or whatever that was seems a bit too silly. Okay yep. So I reckon the sausage shape. Oh you said that. Yeah I said sausage shape. You can both say it. Oh, OK. I mean, in this case, it does feel like the only possible correct answer. Which is, that is my fault. Are we right?

Do we get to find out? Well, let's find out. Here's who wrote the answers. Some of these will shock you. The first one sounds like something like what person in the partnership would tell the other to make him feel better. Yeah. No, you're my Alan Toad, babe.

Oh my god, no, babe, you're my Alan Toad. You might have a micro penis, but we match. I've got such a tiny little moot. Are you allowed to say that on your podcast? Moot? Yeah, this Brisbane baby. Yeah, yeah, I think moot's fine, yeah. Well Well you are in Brisbane, so you should talk like the locals. Yeah, please say Mutt instead of vagina from now on Matt. Oh Matt, Mutt, that's good.

Mutt Stewart. I could rebrand. Yeah, that would be so fun. The only problem with Mutt, I find it a very hard word to spell. Mutt? It looks like Mt if you do a U. I think it's gotta have an umlaut over an O. I think an umlaut would really class it up. Yeah. Class up the word moot. How would you spell moot?

I would spell it M-U-T-T. Yeah, see that's mutt, isn't it? Not in Brisbane, mate. We don't. I think if the U has an umlaut, then I'm with ya. Yeah, maybe mutt should have the umlaut. Maybe moot's perfect the way it is. It's just one woman's opinion.

Hey, I'm making space for you, Rhee. Just enough. So anyway, that one about tiny vaginas was Rhee. Thank you. A factoid about Alan, that was about tiny vaginas was Ree. Thank you. A factoid about Alan, that was Jennifer Welliver, okay. The house. Gregory Toyd's brother, also the house. This one will shock some. Dentist was Goxie.

Yes. Meaning that both Ree and Goxie are correct, it is shaped like a sausage. Oh my God. Meaning that both Rui and Goxie are correct. It is Shaped Like a Sausage. Oh my God. I thought you were gonna say it's a Dendis. So Jake, did you, you followed what the scoring is? They both picked Shaped Like a Sausage, yeah? Yes.

So it's one all to Rui and Goxie. You are good. You are. I'm fucking on the money, bro. You're good at everything about the sound quality. Yeah, yes, so it's one or two You're good at everything about the sound quality Can I just put a conspiracy theory out there Oh I reckon I reckon Matt is working in cahoots with big telecommunication Making us do a text message

That's why of big telecommunication making us do a text message. That's why I can, you just got us here to send a text message, didn't you? You're the last person holding out on unlimited texts on the planet. You know, I can still, I can make the numbers work. You owe me 22 cents, man. All right, we're up to question number two. This one comes from Rhiannon Healy from Brisbane.

Are you in Rhiannon? That one was way more likely. Question two comes from Rhiannon Healy from Brisbane. What a moot not being here tonight. Is that how people use it? Yeah, perfect. Rhiannon's question is, what is the name of a real salamander?

So you just gotta come up, there's a salamander, a little known salamander, not like, not a pet salamander's name, a species of salamander. Oh, I was like Pete. So Goxie, you write at the same time as Rhee. Yeah, let's get our phones out again. What is it again? Rhee, can you help me with Goxie, you write at the same time as Rhee. Yeah, let's get our phones out again. What is it again? Rhee, can you help me with Goxie? It's like the species or something.

And while you're writing your answers, here's some more info on Alantoid. Vocabulary.com writes, It means curving and somewhat round in shape rather than jagged. Which I think sausage-shaped is a lot more efficient way of saying that. You don't tend to get crinkle cut sausages do you? But, or do you? I don't. That was a genuine question. I just submitted my answer and then you were just like, to an audience member, what's happened? Are you okay? Yeah, I'm having a little breakdown. Jennifer writes of Allantoid, it's also, this is-

Oh, this is what an Allantoid is? This is what an Allantoid is. Oh, okay. So that's why there's no silences, because while you're writing, I'm filling them in with further information. You're giving them boring facts. Sorry. That was a bit too real, man. Jennifer writes,

"'Allantoid' is, and I think this is fun for a live show, it's also of or relating to the allantois, which is an organ of respiration or excretion from embryonic birds and reptiles." Ew. I still don't understand what an allantoid is. That's something that's sausage shaped. So a sausage is alantoid. Oh, so it's just the shape of something that looks like a sausage.

Yeah, anything that looks like a sausage could be described as alantoid. So my husband has an alantoid dick. Yes, and you've got an inverted alantoid. Yeah, because it goes really crazy. It's like a crescent moon and no balls. I think this is gonna be another unreleased for one. What is it about this fucking venue? I think the, if I was gonna draw a common denominator, it is that all the guests are Brisbaneites.

Yeah, we're all fucked. All right. I haven't been out of the house this week. Oh it's so good to have you out. Yeah it's nice to be here mentally ill as ever. Answering for question number two what is the name of a real salamander? Blue Dennis. Oh that's a good one. Mexican walking salamander. That's option two. Option three, crazy moot salamander. I panicked. Option four, lasagna lizard.

Or finally, salamander, I hardly knew her. Laughter It's actually really hard to pick. Well, Goxie's up first this time. What do you think in Goxie? Blue Dennis, Mexican Walking, Salamander, Crazy Mut, Lasagna Lizard or Salamander? I hardly knew her. Lasagna one sounds tasty. Laughter Wasanya lizard or salamander? I hardly knew her. Wasanya one sounds tasty. But let's go blue Dennis. Blue Dennis, fantastic.

Locking that in for the gox. What do you think, Rhee? Yeah, I was thinking the blue Dennis or the what was the walking one? Mexican walking. Mexican walking. Oh, that's fun. I'm gonna go blue Dennis because I just really like the vibe of like a blue, just a big fucking thick like dinosaur that's called the blue Dennis.

Do you know what I mean? I know. I feel like he'd really protect me. Do you look like a suburban hobart or something? Blue Dennis? No, no. Salamanca or whatever. There's a few people who have hobarted in their time. I think you're right.

I think you're right. Do you think Salamanders are Alan Toied? I think they could right. Do you think Salamand is an alantoid? I think they could be if they lost their legs and curled up in a specific position, because I actually know what an alantoid shape is. But I think that in their general state, they are not alantoid. OK.

Ding. That's correct. That's correct. Well done. Thank you. Here's the right answer. Salam's correct that's correct well done. Here's the right the answer Salamand her I hardly knew her that was Rihanna and aka the house crazy mut Salamander that was Rhee. That's so weird I didn't remember writing that. Mexican. I didn't put the umlaut either I was like no. No I know.

Normal spelling of mut. I had to guess I'm like does no. No, I know. Normal spelling of Mutt. I had to guess. I'm like, oh, does she mean crazy Mutt? Or does she mean crazy Mutt? Mexican walking salamander, that was Garxy. Oh, that's a good one. I was thinking about Guzman and Gomez. Yeah. I was like, Mexican, I wanna walk there now.

I don't know. You both went for blue Dennis, but I'm afraid walk there now. You both went for blue, Dennis, but I'm afraid that was the house. The correct answer was lasagna lizard. What? The silliest answer? Yeah, I'm afraid so. The house is tricksy.

All right, question number three comes from Kieran Donahue from Brisbane. On your donors. You in tonight, Kieran? Yes, yes, yes. This same question was sent in by two people. It was also sent in by Emily Keane in LA. That's a mess.

Parallel thinking. Kieran and Emily's question is, what is the name of the chief trackside officer of the Aston Martin Formula One team? What the fuck is that question? I don't know, Steve? No, no, you're still texting it to... Oh, sorry. But can you say that again?

What is the name of the chief trackside officer for the Aston Martin? Can you be slow? Can you say slower? You're just like really quick. I've never been asked to speak slower before. Yeah. This feels awesome.

I need you to, I need you to speak slower. Yeah. Man, I love to. You're so quick. You're just so like energetic and vibrant and quick. What is, I mean really the question is make up a name. Just like a person's name? Yeah, just a person's name, yeah.

And what does he do? But he like works for a Formula One team. Okay, okay cool, thanks. That's just to give him a reason to exist, but really what you're doing is just making up a name. Which is a bit of fun, I wonder if I'll have more in it. While you're writing your answers oh let me show the audience the lasagna lizard. Oh yeah I think it is yeah quite, quite all into it, isn't it?

What's lasagna about it? Oh, let me tell you, Goxie. This is from an article in the BBC written by Graham Green. He says they're also probably more commonly known as hellbenders. Um, but he writes, the elusive little-known freshwater amphibians, which can grow up to 29 inches or 74 centimeters long, not bad, live in rivers, in underwater caves

or dens formed by boulders. They have broad flat head and stocky flattened bodies that help them blend in a rocky stream beds with long strong limbs and small beady eyes on the top of their heads. My ears are burning. They're usually brown or grey in colour with blotchy or mottled skin that helps them to remain. Where's the lasagna part? This is, it's bad when I'm feeling bored by it. Their skin is wrinkled and loose especially especially along the sides of their body, which increases

the surface area for respiration. These flappy folds of skin along their torsos look like cooked lasagna. That's the name. Oh my god. I would literally kill myself if I was at Salamander. You get named after your disgusting loose skin? Like I have so Salamander. You get named after your disgusting loose skin? Like I have so many other qualities.

Well, funnily enough, they do have a bunch of other names. Are they all mean? I think so, yeah. Here they are. Levarian Waternoot, that's not so bad. Allegheny Alligator, Grampus. Grampus? Yeah, Grampus. What theus? They're grampus.

What the fuck? Water dog, mud dog. Mud dog? Mud devil, devil dog, and snot otter. No, you just know the scientist in charge of naming the salamander who wanted to go and work on tigers. Like he was so fucking pissed, he had to go work with the big lizards.

It sounded like you just listed in like a country footy team. My guts. My dog. All right. Answering for question number three. What is the name of the chief trackside officer of the Aston Martin Formula One team?

Chief trackside. Kent Simpson. Mike Crack. Chief Shez. team Kent Simpson Mike crack chief shares Jerry can Brad or dick faster dick faster Bradares, Mike Crack, or Kent Simpson. We're back to you, Rhee. What do you reckon? It is funny. It's funny. Normally people play this game for the first time in the studio and they can like quietly go, this is fucking weird.

Why are we doing this? But when they're on stage realising it, they sort of have to remain polite about it. And Rhee is just holding on to being like what are we doing here tonight? It's so funny because I was like so excited to do this podcast. I didn't know what this podcast was but I was excited to do it and I've been like with my almost two-year-old all day and I was like I can't wait to go out and talk to people and have a real conversation. Like it feels like he's here with me. He's like, Chad, Chief Chaz, Jerry Can, I'm like, fuck! You know?

Any of those jumping out at you? I think Jerry Can would be a fun name if you worked on cars, because that's the car thing. Is it? Am I right? Thank you. And what are they again? Dick Faster, Brad, Jerry Can. I'm gonna pick Dick Faster.

Pick Dick Faster? That's awesome. Dick Faster? I fucking hope it's that, hey. Oh, I hope it's that. How do you hear it as like a speedy dick or someone who's not gonna eat some for a while? I was thinking speedy dick but I do like just like someone who's on Lent from dick.

That's so fun. 40 days. Yeah. What about you goxy? Yeah, I Reckon the Kent one can Kent Simpson sounds a lesser at least ridiculous well, you will learn that that's not how this show works, but Two different people saw that the chief trackside officer of the Aston Martin Formula one team's name was Kent Simpson. Better ride into this podcast. I walked into that one. You're locked in? Yeah, yeah. I'm loyal.

Yeah. Alright, here's who wrote the answers. Chief Ches, that was Ree. Chief Chez, it was actually Chief Chez. Oh, I fucked it. Chief Chez. Chief Chez. I just find it funny if he was the chief of the thing

and his name was Chief Chez. It just sounds good, don't you think? I think it's a fantastic name. I'm having a girl, but I think I'm gonna call her that. Chief Chez. Chief Chez is really nice. Boy or girl, I reckon. Yeah, have to have gender neutral name for sure. Jerry Cann, that was the house. I love the boots. Brad, that was Goxie. Nice, nice. Now, Goxie went for Kent Simpson and I might not have

mentioned this yet but Jake who's doing sound and scoring is also throwing in some answers so you've given a point to Jake. Yeah, what's up motherfucker? Someone's just entered the game. I've had a lot of beers so I'm not gonna lie to. Now, can you explain to me what the thinking behind that was? Kent Simpson. I sent an email today to someone with the name Kent, and then I couldn't think of Ethan for the last name, and there you go.

Wow. Isn't it incredible to see behind the scenes? Oh my god. Wait, does that mean I'm right? What did you, you went for Dick Fasta? I'm afraid that was Kieran aka the question writer aka the house. Kieran you piece of shit dog. Can't believe you attack a pregnant woman that's fucked up. My unborn child is suffering. Get him out of here. Get him out. Boo! No, no, it was a good question.

I feel like it would be pretty common knowledge if there was a guy called Dick Fafner. I reckon there's heaps of people with crazy names in the world that we don't know about yet. Well, the correct answer no one got was Mike Crack. Did you even read that answer out? I hope I did. Did he? How is it spelled if you don't mind me asking?

Mike. M-I-K-E. Crack. K-R-A-C-K. Oh, the classic crack spelling too. So it's probably like Norwegian or something. Yeah. It's true, they've got names.

Where? I mean, they got names that sound like that in that area. They do, no, it's 100% true. I checked that quickly and it is true. Jake, that means there's a point for the house and a point for you that round. What's the score check after three rounds at the halfway mark? Okay, so Gox is on one. Rhea's on one. The house is on three.

Oh. But luckily, Big Jake is on one as well. What do you mean luckily? Well, I'm doing my own game up here. You can't spell wonderful without one. Well, it's just... That is true. I didn't finish TAFE, alright.

I like Jake's. Did you like Jake's order? I think they should do that in the Olympics. Equal second, equal second first, equal second. Yeah. It's a fresh take on how you do a leaderboard. I liked it. Yeah. It's a fresh take on how you do a leaderboard. I like to. Yeah. Question four also comes from Brisbane. Is Matt Tilby in the house? Yay! All right, if you thought the last one was gibberish.

Oh God. Well, here's another one. Matt's question is, as a marketing gimmick, what is the Binghampton minor league baseball team changing its name slash mascot to for select games in 2025? So they're the Binghampton baseball team, but they're changing just for a couple of games so they can sell some merch with a wacky name. They've changed their name to something.

What is that? What are they? And a new mascot as well. Yeah, just the mascot. So it's the Binghampton something. Is this like a job you have upcoming that you're making us do the work for? What the hell? Are you in marketing, Matt?

No, I'm rich. Okay, well. So like. I would like to copyright my answer. Okay. Because you. Because it's gonna be really good. Okay.

Okay. While you're writing your answers, here's a little more info about my crack. And. While you're writing your answers, here's a little more info about Mike Crack. Emily writes, I think it's pretty clear why I suggested this man. It's so dismissive. There's a slot in when you submit your questions to say any extra information. And Emily had a bit of attitude there, to be honest. Kieran was a lot more forthcoming riding. Mike Crack was previously the team

principal of the Aston Martin team until this year when he was demoted to chief trackside officer. Sorry about that Mike, brutal. Watching the race coverage was always improved when they cut to ask Mike a question. Normally he's asked about if one of his drivers who is also the son of the team's owner, they ask is he any good and he has to answer yes I think he is just as good as our other driver the two-time world champion Fernando Alonso. What an impossible task but Mike Crack seemed to be up for it. He's in the room the guy wrote that. At least fame that you enjoyed that. Hey, while you're still writing your answers. Here's a show that we recommend.

If the New Year's resolution you made to read more books is not quite panning out, don't sweat it. I've got you covered. I'm Mattea Roach, and my new podcast Bookends is all about discovering great books and getting to know the writers behind them. Like Brian Leo Malley, whose personal connection to Toronto helped him create the icon, Scott Pilgrim. Bookends with Matea Roach is available now wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com. All right, we're back.

All right, the answers are in for question number four. As a marketing gimmick, what is the Binghampton minor league baseball team changing its name to for select games in 2025? The Binghampton Blue Wahoos, the Binghampton Brats, the Binghampton Bathtub Donkeys, the Binghampton Knives, the Binghampton Bing Bang Bungos or the Binghampton Blueys? Okay, Goxie. Blue Wahoos, Brats, bath tub donkeys, knives, Bing Bang Bungos or Blueys? Actually I'm gonna kill myself. They're all in. They're all in. I'm gonna walk into traffic. Bye. I just say the future is not bright for Binghampton.

Are they even a real team? Does anyone know? And I follow some pretty bad sports teams. Can you say them again please? Blue Wahoos, Brats, bathtub donkeys, knives, bing bang bongos, or blueies? I heard nothing. I reckon the bathtub donkeys,

because I mean, that's insane, but this is America we're talking about. Look how tired Goxie looks right now. This is America we're talking about. He's like, oh my God. That's as political as I get. I just take a shot at America here in Paddington. Or whatever suburb this is.

Is it? Yeah, babe. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. Yeah, we're on Caxton Street in Paddington. No, it's not Paddington. Paddington is nearby. It's Petri Terrace. Petri Dish. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. Yeah. We're on Caxton Street in Paddington.

No, it's not Paddington. No, it's Petri Terrace. Petri dish. LAUGHTER Makes sense, actually. Don't come here insulting our... Isn't this called the Caxton Street Brewing Company? Yeah, but Petri Terrace is both a street and it's also a suburb.

Petri Terrace is a suburb? Yeah, bruh. Don't yell at me! It's what? The smallest suburb. Gordon Park is the smallest suburb actually. Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! And you all thought my fact about salamanders was dull. What is a place, not a suburb? What is a place, not a suburb? Oh, man. What's, isn't a, it's a place, not a suburb.

What's a suburb if not a place? Anyway, I think this is really important to get to the bottom of, so we're gonna finish up the podcast, we're all going to meet out in the square, town square. In the suburb of Petrie Terrace. That doesn't sound right. No, it sounds- It's like if a suburb was called like Watson Street.

Does that make sense? Why is Terrace in the suburb name? When did this, wait, when did this happen? Does anyone know? 1827. You're attacking a pregnant woman. I'm pre-partum and I'm post-partum, so how dare you. I will snap it any second. Okay, whatever.

Goxie's going bathtub donkeys. What do you agree? Oh yeah. What were they again? Blue Wahoos, Brats. I'm just gonna go Blue Wahoos. I don't care. Blue Wahoos is the one that really caught my ear when you said it.

Maybe because it was the first thing you said, but it sounds really fun. The Blue Wahoos. Well, here's who wrote the answers. The Binghampton Blueies, that was Jake. Now Jake, I did say if you've got any funny answers put them in, but um... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've just decided that I'm playing.

LAUGHTER CLAP CLAP CLAP LAUGHTER The Bingbang Bungos was the house, the Knives was Goxie. Ooh. Actually a pretty good name for a sports team. Actually a pretty good name for a sports team. That is a good name for a sports team. The Bratz was Ree, but Ree actually gave more info,

saying everything is bright neon green, 365 blasts instead of the anthem, the mascot is a giant bag of cocaine filled with actual coke. Yes. That'll bring a man. I feel like that would get lips a flapping if they did that. If they're looking for their viral moment. Easy, done.

You're welcome at your job. I want 5% of your commission, Matt. Thank you so much. And I want some of that cocaine, just a baby bump, but I want some of it. Thank you. I had Hunter's fee. My lip was itchy.

I'm not on cocaine. I think everyone knows how wild the world of podcasting is. We're all doing lines out the back. We're all doing lines, seven months pregnant. I get my son in here, I do it off the soft part of his skull. It's great. I'll put him down he's in the car. Sorry what was the question? Well you suggested the Blue Wahoos but that was actually written by Matt aka the question writer I'm afraid. Well I'm gonna find every one of your audience members

that are men. But that means Goxie was correct. It's the Binghampton Bathtub Donkeys. Oh, good job. For a moment there, I thought you meant they're called the Knives. I forgot which thing you were saying I was correct for. I forgot which thing you were saying I was correct for. All right, only two questions to go.

It feels like we're only just getting started. This question also comes from two people, Emmy White from Gainesville, Florida, but also from Brisbane, Caroline Clancy and Caroline. The fuck? Who dropped that dice? There's a game of craps going on at the back. What the fuck? She was here but she disappeared.

That's so far, I spent ages today sorting through the thing, finding Brisbane people. No, fuck you, he's the house. Who fucking cares? Yeah, thank you very much. Anyway, if Caroline Clancy is listening. That hurts, man. Caroline, he's literally crying.

He's probably gonna slap me again, because he's so upset. Hey, here's the penultimate question. The what? The question? The second last question. Oh. Bringing his fancy Melbourne tour copy.

Yeah, what the fuck? Go drink your lattes c***. Translated into Queenslandese play. I go for the Broncos okay why don't you shut your f***ing mouth. Second last question good got it go. What eye-catching headline appeared on livescience.com on May the 23rd 2023? On livescience.com? How would I have any idea? I don't even know what pen to ultimate is, whatever the fuck he said. This is the fifth question why are you asking how the show works now? You make up a fake one. Oh right, what was the question? You've just got... Sorry I feel really manic. You've got to write a headline that appeared, what didn't appear, you just make one up. Oh right.

You make up a headline that might have appeared on LiveScience.com in May 2023. In May 2023. That's right. So maybe a sciencey headline that was obviously interesting enough for some two different people to send in. Does spelling matter? No, as long as I can read it. So yeah, don't worry about the oom louts. I assume that's the word you're asking about. While you are writing your answers, here's some more info about the bathtub donkeys. Matt writes, according to the official announcement page on MLB.com in the 1800s in New York an American Blue Law was put into effect stating that donkeys were prohibited

from sleeping in bathtubs. The bathtub donkey logo, oh my god he's written show the logo. I can't believe I'm doing what you told me. What the fuck? I mean, it's exactly what you would be expecting. It's a donkey in a bathtub, but if Matt wants me to show it to you, I guess. Okay, well, hang on. Oh, that's pretty, oh, maybe that's worth showing. That's pretty cute, actually. Have a look at this guy.

He's using a... He's using his bat as a back scratcher. That's a clean donkey. Okay. That's a clean ass. There's another one. They've turned the baseball there into a bath cap. Is that what you wanted? What are they trying to sell? Baseball.

They... No, no, they're just basically more merch so you can buy... So they can sell a second. Basically it's like a, you know, an alternative strip or whatever. Just giving them more shit to sell. So wait wait what's their original thing that they are the actual thing Matt what was it the rumble pony that's so cute though what do they change it to for temporary sorry I was bath time donkeys oh sexy did't say any of that right. Bathtub donkeys. Bathtub donkeys. Is this in New York? Is this in...

It just doesn't make sense. Bing. So they're still in like the horse game, but it's just like they've got studs on them? Yeah. Right. It is in New York. They really should have done my cocaine idea.

That feels really silly. The tariffs down there. Yeah, true, the tariffs. It's in Broome County, New York, just off the top of my head. All right, answers are in for question number five. Jake, you got until the time I read out the last one if you want to add one in. Up to you. Option one.

So only if I get to option six is Jake written one. Still he has not written a word. Let's see what happens. All right. What eye catching headline appeared on LiveScience.com on the 23rd of May, 2023. Argentinian scientists discovers dinosaur penis kept mummified in amber.

It's option one. Archipelago John Doe once thought victim of hammer throw blow now known as scientist impresario, Candice Cho. No. It's option two. Option three a pair of lovebirds make avian love-making history with a record 237 minutes session. Oh my god that seems like hell. Option four, giant prawn discovered. I panicked! Option five. Giant, phallus shaped iceberg floating in Conception Bay surprises residents of dildo Canada. Are you sure that was five and not six? That was five.

This is six. How did Dr. Seuss predict what was at the bottom of the Mariana Trench? Ooh. Ooh. Is there weird bombing in your own room. Let me guess, you sent an email to Dr. Seuss. What does that mean? You're going to have to dumb that down for us Brisbane types please.

How does Dr. Zeus... Let's just pretend there were five. Well Mariana Trench is like a really deep paleo-sha. Ah right. I forgot the other bit. Alright what do you think? Goxie? Can I have him again?

Yeah, you've got the Argentinian scientist who discovered a mummified penis, dinosaur penis. You've got the John Doe thought victim of hammer throw blow but now known as Kenneth Cho. I hate that so much. You've got the recordbreaking lovebird session. You got the giant prawn being discovered. Or you got the phallic-shaped iceberg.

Yeah, that one. Alright. Dildo Canada. Beautiful. Another beautiful name. Dildo Canada. Wow. This is my daughter, Dildo Canada. Dildo Canada down. Dildo down. Dildo Canada bottoms down. Oh, Iceberg.

Dildo down is sick. That's actually beautiful. Iceberg would be a nice name. Oh yeah. Melts. Melts. Yeah, that's, yeah. I thought it could be a lettuce as well.

Yeah, there's so many options for her. I'm gonna go with, I think it's the iceberg, but I also think it's the bird thing. Cause I feel like some of those scientists, they're always watching, hey. Mm. Do you know what I mean? It's like who fucking timed that?

Who timed that? I wonder if it was scientist, impresario, Kenneth Cho. Don't, don't, don't, I'll kill myself. Um... Um... I'm gonna pick... I'm gonna pick the birds, why not? I don't even care.

I don't care about the points, I just care about being here with you guys. That is a... I can't believe they bought that. I know. No, I'm actually so happy to be out of the house. Alright, here's who wrote the answers. I'm looking forward to hearing Jake's explanation for his... What he's done, everything he's done in his entire life. How did Dr Seuss predict what was at the bottom of the Mariana Trench?

Ah, guys, I don't even want to talk about that. That's just the most pathetic thing I've ever done. That's not true, I've done a lot of really bad things. I thought it was fantastic. Thanks mates. But how did he? Jake is it fair to say this wasn't over our heads, It just was gibberish? It was just purely shit, yeah. Oh, okay.

You were like, oh, you get a type-c, and it was just full screen. I mean, really, you wrote that in 10 seconds. It's interesting how your brain works, isn't it? It's not. I would love to check your sent inbox and your emails. Just you furiously emailing the Mariana Trench. Ha ha ha!

You're so deep. Ha ha ha! You're so deep! Ha ha ha! Argentinian scientist discovering the dinosaur penis. That was Rhee. Thanks. Not funny, but I was trying to, when you said that you've got to like, it's something that someone would actually notice

to put into the podcast. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, oh, that's like a really good tip. That was definitely a, yeah, you were right on. I didn't put mood in it. Thanks, you guys. You did great. The only thing I would, I think-

But I was like, how would they preserve a dinosaur dick? And so I put amber and then I was like, should I put amber like substance? And I was like, that's not very livescience.com. Yeah, I think you live science.com. No. Yeah, I think you nailed it. Thanks. The thing is, you've only got one person you need to convince and it's Goxie.

And you said it and he goes, nah, immediately. Nah. Disheartening. The one about the John Doe found at the archipelago, now known as scientific in Brazario, Kenneth Cho, tell you what, that took me five minutes. that was sitting at a cafe around the corner today. Rhymezone.com is open. Oh my god.

Hearing it actually like hurts. Yeah. Like it actually physically hurts to hear it. Yeah I do regret it. No I think you did a very good job as the house, you're playing against us, it's discombobulating us. Yeah. And making me feel like extremely unsafe.

Not with that, but just with your aura. Um. I hope irony comes through on podcast. Yeah. That wasn't quite a sentence that made sense. Guys, you should see the chair Matt put me in. It's so little. Put you in a chair?

He put me in a chair, it's really small. People have now pictured you in a little hot chair. I have to look up at him like he's my master. Giant prawn discovered, that was Goxie. Do you want to take us behind the curtain on that one? Basically I was thinking, you know, prawns. It would be sick to see a real big one. Again, I didn't finish TAFE.

Ray, you guessed the Lovebird record making love session. Unfortunately for you, that was written by the question writer, Caroline Clancy, AKA the house. I hate the way you say AKA the house. Yeah. Do you always say it like that? Yeah, I think so. Everyone, yeah.

Yeah, he does, it's gross. This will be the last episode. You could just say representing the house. And then it doesn't sound so awful to hear. Am I wrong? AKA the house, it sounds so, shit. I'll put up a poll, I'm very democratic about these things. Yay or nay?

Yay. Yeah. Geez, unfortunately there was only one vote, but it was a yay. I demand a recount. One nil. I think this is the longest you and I have ever spoken to each other too.

I'm sorry to attack you. But I stand by what I said. That means Goxie is once again correct. Giant phallus shaped Osberg. Floating in Conception Bay. He picked him. Bay surprises residents of dildo Canada. Apparently dildo Canada's motto is we're not changing the name. Bit of fun. So that means a point there to Goxie and a point to the house Jake and it brings us up

to the final question which means the last question and I was confused how many left this one comes from Bree from Hervey Bay in Queensland Harvey Bay with an E It's Harvey mate. Yeah I know I get it it's just weird to spell it wrong but um. It's not wrong. Okay. You're just from fuckwit Victoria okay. No we there's so many off-spelt things down there. It's a beautiful beautiful beautiful place. Brisbane is my favourite, I love Brisbane, love Brisbane. Best city in Australia, no doubt. All right, this will be your longest answer, Brie. Oh God. Brie. Oh, I'm getting belittled.

So, you're just gonna, this one will be like two, three sentences long. The question is, what is the synopsis of the 1984 film Bolero? So you just gotta describe the film, synopsis, two, three sentences, short paragraph. can I get that in a sentence the word Bolero yeah besides what you just said I don't like a description of what I think of me thank you it's all I think it's also a like a Spanish, I think. Might be a dance.

It's so many, what is in Bolero? I'm picking up the vibe, okay. What did you? It's an item of clothing. Okay, it's an item of clothing. An item of clothing, thank you. That's broader than what you said. You were very specific with small jacket.

I think she was correct. Oh. I love women support women. That's what's happening. She was like, yes yes she was also correct way both correct there you go re love it so happy with that yeah I mean so confused a movie in 1984 you just got a 1984 writer synopsis two three sentences long okay this movie was about you know blah blah blah and while you're doing you got to do that now

And then we can all go. Yep I'll send mine and then I'll delete it and then I would give my phone to you then you can send me. So you're with me Goxie describe a synopsis of a film called Bolero from 984. Two three sentences about what the film's about. You're a big buff, movie buff. Yeah I love them. If you, is everyone here Facebook friends with Goxie? He's like checking in all the time. I'm watching this movie. He loves movies. So this one's a real layup for him and by the way it's triple points for you too. So it's truly anyone's game. While they're writing their answers, while they're writing their answers here's some more

information about that dickberg. So the article was written by Stephanie Pappas and she writes, doesn't get any more apt than this. A photographer from Newfoundland, I don't know how to say it, the town of Dildo has captured images of a penis-shaped iceberg off the Canadian coast. The suggestive berg consists of a column with a domed head protruding up from two oval rafts of ice. Photographer Ken Pretty captured a shot of the ice formation by drone near the harbor grace which sits along Conception Bay. Perhaps unsurprisingly the Dicky berg as locals are calling it has attracted international attention with Pretty sharing news stories from as far away as Thailand and Taiwan pretty said I knew I'd get a lot of comments but I didn't expect this much alas the Osberg lacked

staying power pretty photographed the 30 foot or 9.1 meter phallic structure on Thursday the 27th of April and it collapsed the next day. One day is pretty good staying power. According to the CBC it's a strong iceberg season in Newfoundland and Labrador with more than 200 of the coasts of the two provinces. This is pretty dull stuff I'll show why don't I show it to you um what did I call it Dick Berg oh that would be that would that don't you think that would be a great name for like a formula one guy dick Berg dildo is this gonna be safe dildo if Oh. Is this going to be safe?

Dildo Canada. If I put in Canada, I think that dildo Canada. I'll show you whatever it is, but. No, it was. Oh man, there's some other great headlines here. The Guardian went with Chilly Willie. Perth Now said Dicky Burg. CBC.

Iceberg lovers go wild. Anyway, let's see. Oh yeah. I mean, come on. Have a look. Like, that is... Yeah. Someone did a very under their breath sort of heckle. Said, someone's got blue balls, which I think was pretty good.

I thought it was pretty good. I thought it was pretty good. I think they should have said it with more confidence. Someone's got blue balls which I think was pretty good I thought it was pretty good that was pretty good I think they should have said it with more confidence Someone's got blue balls No you were right in the first instance you are you were right to be shy about that the answers are in for the final question it all comes down as Jake do we want to get a score check before we go to the last round? Absolutely. So far I've got Goxion two.

Yep. It's not bad. That's good. I've got Rion. Depending on what it's out of. I've got Rion one. Yeah, I know I'm on one. That's okay.

That's all right. Thanks. I'm just having fun. I've got the house on six. Ooh. I don't know. That's so evil. You're like a conglomerate. All right, the answers are in. Final question. Here we go. It all I don't know. That's so evil. You're like a conglomerate.

All right, the answers are in. Final question. Here we go. It all comes down to this. Remember, triple points, it means. But does it come down to this to me? Cause I'm one point. If Goxie picks yours and you pick the correct one,

you get six points. Okay, that's not gonna happen. But that's really positive thinking. That's good vibes. You're playing for two tonight. Come on, let's do it. All right, here's. That's true. This is really important to. That's good vibes. You're playing for two tonight. Come on, let's do it. All right, here's- That's true.

This is really important to me all of a sudden. Come on, do it for little Dildo. Dildo moot down. That was a call back to something, right? Yeah. Gox the ante to bed. Well, Matt, that's just how Matt talks in general. All right, final question.

What is the synopsis of the 1984 film Bolero? Option one, a Spanish dance teacher falls in love with one of his students, leading to disastrous consequences. Will he come to his senses and remember that their relationship should be strictly dancing, or will he continue to dance with the devil? That's a fucking paragraph. Yes. That is what I said a paragraph.

Two or three sentences. Whoops. No, you're alright. They're all about the same thing. Okay. Option number two. Follows the tale of a 1920s English heiress's sexual awakening and subsequent journey around the world in pursuit of her ideal lover.

Encounters include an Arabian sheik and a Spanish bullfighter. Her friend and butler accompany her and help to arrange her couplings. I'd watch that. That. That is option number two. Option number three. A take on Joseph's Technicolor dream coat through the lens of Mexico's vibrant culture. A love story between Jose and his wife, his god and his banquero.

That's option three, option four. Option four, Greg Bolero is the hot, no. Greg Bolero is the hottest trader on Wall Street. He eats, sleeps, and dreams stock. But when he meets a white-eyed woman fresh from an Alabama college, will he realize while it's good to buy low and sell high,

maybe right in the middle, there's room to love. We got some budding young script writers here. That's option four, option five. An inside job bank robbery goes wrong when a local roller blade gang uncovers illegal corruption. That's been happening. You gotta admit, that'd be a sick movie.

Man, all these movies sound amazing to me. Or finally, two of the finest young talents on Broadway have put everything they have into their starring roles. The musical Bolero. They're all out of cash. They're all out of luck and they need this gambit to pay off Bolero I thought you said Ben Jarreau Not that it makes any difference at all. No, no, it does.

Because remember, there's only one person here who needs to guess it and he may not have picked up on that. Okay, cool. So I'll quickly go through them again. A Spanish dance teacher falling in love with one of his students. But, you know, will he continue to dance with the devil, that one. Then you've got the heiress's sexual awakening, she travels around with her butler, getting coupled up. Then you've got the take on Joseph's Technicolor dreamcoat

through the lens of Mexico's vibrant culture. A love story between Jose, his wife, his God, and his Bolero. You've got, you've got Greg Bolero, the hottest trader on Wall Street, eats, sleeps, and dreams stock. But he, we'll really find room for love. Then you've got the inside bank robbery with the rollerblade gang who uncovers corruption that's been happening or you've got the

finest young talents on Broadway who have put everything they have into their starring roles the musical Bolero. Goksi, do you wanna go first here? Yeah, I reckon the Spanish dancer. Spanish dancer, the first one? Yeah. The one with the, oh, there was one note I forgot to add in at the end. It says, will he come to his senses

and remember that their relationship should be strictly dancing, or will he continue to dance with the devil? In brackets, note, his student is also the devil. This changes things. Now it's definitely that one. No, because I was just thinking now there was that era of the dance movie. I don't know if it was the 90s or... The era? Like strictly ballroom and what was that tap dancing one?

Dirty dancing? Tap dogs? Yeah, tap dogs. Tap dogs? Dirty dancing as well. Yeah, that one they dance on the bar at the pub. Oh, put it ugly. I'm going to do that after the show.

Singing in the rain? Singing in the rain. I think the era of dance movies... That's different times, that's eras. The era of dance movies you're talking about is the 20th century. Electric Boogaloo. Great sequel. Step up to the streets. Big, they're in the rain. Hot, hot. Fucking so sexy. Hot.

So yes. What are you thinking? Yeah, lock it in. That leaves you Rhee, what do you think? Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I'm gonna pick whatever's last. The last one? The Hollywood thing. The Broadway one? Yep. Locking that in for real. Okay, here's who wrote the answers.

The inside bank robbery that goes wrong when the Roller Gang uncovers the legal corruption that's been happening. That was Goxie. Yay! Yeah, so if I find out that becomes a movie, I'm coming up. Yeah, so if I find out that becomes a movie, I'm coming up. Greg Bolero being the hottest trader on Wall Street, that was the how... See how everyone hates it.

I don't even know what I'm doing. I swear I didn't know what I was doing until you pointed it out and again I'd forgotten. I thought you might have shamed me to stop but no you didn't I will shame you once more in an attempt for you to say it like a person that exists the take on Joseph's Technicolor dream coat the one with the belay Joe What was it? Was that a real word? Anyway, that was Ree. I literally can't breathe. I was so smug. I was so smug writing it. I was like, that sounds so good. I think I said, Penjero.

I was like between a man, a Jose, I called him Jose instead of Joseph Jose, his wife, his God, and his Penjero. Penjero. And I was like, hmm, Santa. Honestly, I mean, I just thought, oh man, that sounds cool. I didn't realize that was a mistake.

I was ready to pick it. Thank you so much. Goksi, you went for the one where the student was literally the devil. That was Brie, AKA the house. Oh my God. Everyone loves it too. Brie, you went for the last one, which we've already established is always Jake's.

Oh yeah. How does that feel, fuckwit? You don't mix them around. That's triple points for Jake, widely. Meaning no one got the correct answer, which is apparently an awful movie about a 1920s English heiress who tries to lose her virginity traveling around the world with her butler. That sounds so juicy and good.

That's with Bo Derek. Cool. It has, on Rotten Tomatoes, a 0% critical approval rating. Audience likes it a bit more, 17%. Here's in part a brutal review by Rick Chatenever which reads, Bolero is less a movie than an endurance test and it's almost more interesting just watching people get up and leave than it is to try and hang in there for whatever's going on on screen. He reviewed this in 1984 so he actually saw it at the cinema. More than half the audience left before the end of the

night that I saw it, wearing day's looks as though trying to figure out what was worse, the movie itself or the fact they had come to see it. Some movies that didn't start out to be comedies wind up in the so bad that they're great category. Not this one. It's just so bad that it's awful. So yeah, that, but you know, apparently Bo Derek's naked a lot, so, and her husband at the time directed it. It was, yeah, it's a real odd. I think it might be a bit crook. All right. But it's too late now. It sounds like kind of low-key like Poor Things, no? I'm going, yeah.

Yeah. Jake, final score check please. Mate, I've got a Goxie on too. Wait. Hey, Jake, do you mind just trying something wild? Can you do it lowest to highest? Build up a bit of tension, even though I'm pretty sure everyone can count. Ree is on one.

Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Wow. That's so cool.

Goxie is on two. Woo! Woo! Yeah! I'm also on two. No, you're on three, aren't you? You're on four. Am I?

Triple points that last one. Thanks mate. Hey, maybe we can go top to top? Little kiss. And the house is on a disgusting seven. Oh my goodness. Boom! Well done to the house.

Boom, boom! Like I tried to, I'm telling Goksi, oh, here's an extra bit of detail. It's definitely not right. And he's like, lock it in. I'm loyal. You are, you are. Gox, where can people find you before we go?

Um... You know, people listening. Sunnybank. Just in the room, but people listening are... Do you mean like, where do I live? I mean like, where if they were gonna follow on social media or something. Oh yeah, sorry, Instagram.

For me. Facebook. I was looking for specifics, but... I got kicked off Twitter, so I'm not on that. But your Instagram handle is like Aaron Goggs. Oh yeah it's just my name Aaron Goggs. I'm jealous that people have those creative ones. I'm like I'm not creative enough to think about it. No I think that that would be silly because people want to find you for your name. Okay thanks for that. That's okay babe, you did a really good job too. Oh. Here I am doubting myself. No, that's perfect.

And Rhy, what about you? Mine is Redown. Oh my god, you got it as well. Nothing fancy, nothing creative. I know, I just saw today that you have a business that puts things in resin. Yeah, I do. I, someone was like, woo.

Woo, that's awesome. Like dinosaur dicks? Dinosaur dicks, moots. No, I, it's far to even talk about it on the podcast, but I have a business and it's, I preserve flowers and predominantly they're wedding flowers. It's like quite bougie. Which obviously makes sense from everything that I've said tonight. But yeah, I work with a lot of brides and stuff around Australia

and they send me their flowers and I put them in resin for weddings and it's nice. It's chill. So good. Yeah. It's not funny. That's why I don't talk about it. Look at you all staring at me like, okay, bitch. No I didn't. Hey Jake, you run the best comedy club around. It shows on what, four nights a week? Yeah, thanks bro. Yeah, it's Wednesday through to Saturday, every week.

You're disgusting. If people are in Brisbane, they come down, good chat comedy club. Rhe and Gox are often on the lineups here. It's the best comedy club in Brisbane. Thanks Rhe. Thanks Rhe. That's right.

Thank you. That's all you needed to say. Thanks so much for coming everyone tonight. Sorry it was weird or you're welcome, either way. I didn't think it was weird, I think it was fun. Yeah. Thanks so much everyone for listening. Please give us a big thumbs up if you tell your friends

and cheers to Trinna Ina, who knew with Matt's Show. Now that you know what, I've been Matt's Show at Goodbye. Yeah! On a stool, just on a stool, just basic intentions on a stool, just on a stool, just basic intentions on a stool. Seven months pregnant on a stool, that's actually what. Thank you so much. Yeah, thank you. I like basic intentions.

I've got no excuse. What is it? Well, it's basic instinct. Basic instinct. I thought you brought together two classics together nice. Yeah, it could be either. Yeah. My brain doesn't work anymore. So I'm glad I'm here on a live show. That's really smart and good All right, this will be edited out. Okay good

I just remembered I need the internet And I've got it All right now you're lifting and I'm starting to really like you guys. Can you guys see my vagina? Ok thanks. I'm wearing bike pants. They're trying to finger me. Keep that in.

What about the labia? Am I crowning? You can keep that in. What about the labia? Am I crowning? Imagine the water breaks tonight. That would be dope. Oh my god, get it out of me. I'm over it. Yeah. Extra dipping sauce for you, babe.

Yeah, Ree's her nickname. Sorry. Hold on the edge of your seats, everyone. Hey, you know, re-up is a phrase, right? And you're re-down. What's the phrase re-up mean? I think it's a gaming thing or something. No, I think it's drugs.

Drugs. Ooh, then I don't mind that. Is that not a phrase? Re-up? Re-up? It's a betting thing. Didn't they say it in the wire? I don't know.

Does anyone watch the wire? I gotta tell you, I'm pretty glad I brought that up. I'm sorry to interrupt, Jake. Can I get a normal fucking chair, please? I'm actually in pain sitting on this chair. Jake, can we get a normal chair for the- A little one? Yeah, no. Oh, here we go.

Oh, here we go. I'll get a- like imagine me sitting you on the stool. Don't go see it's soaking wet. Should I give that to him? I don't think he wants to sit on a stool, but we're getting him a chair. Do you want to- yeah, you don't want to sit on a stool. but we're getting him a chair. Do you wanna, yeah, you don't wanna sit on a stool. Oh no, a chair's coming, a chair's coming. Sorry everyone.

Why don't we all, no we can all take chairs. Why don't we all sit on chairs? Sorry. Stools fucking suck. But I'm pregnant, I'm a miracle, so I need to be looked after. You've got a little alantoid in ya. I'm a little, out here my little.

This doesn't look great now. It looks like me and Madeline. It looks like we're about to make a porn a little Alan-toid in ya. I'm a little, yeah, I'm a little. This doesn't look great now. It looks like me and Madda are like. It looks like we're about to make a porn a little bit. Look up to your. Like a really specific niche-ed, fetish-ed porn. It looks like, like, look up to your things. No one gets to come. That's one of the niches.

Yeah. Nice. It looks like me and Madda showing Ree, like how the, the hierarchy of comedy works, like... LAUGHS This is where girls sit, they sit beneath the men! That's very funny, Goxie. LAUGHS

I'm trying to say I'm a... what's the word? Ally. You are an ally. I almost said alibi. LAUGHS If you ever need me, I'm an alibi. That really fucked my shit up, hey? So confused. For the listeners, Matt just slapped me across the face.

Really, really hard. That is not true. That's so true. Everyone, guys, cheer if you saw Matt slap me really hard across the face. Well, there's all the evidence I need. I was probably a little slow in denying that as well. Hang on, no I didn't. You took like 10 beats and you're like, no I didn't. My hand was still smarting, that's all. Thanks you guys. This will not be released.

Apparently, Ree, the Blue Wahoos is actually a real minor league baseball team name. Really? I just knew it sounded right. Wait, hang on. You made me look it up, Matt, and you've written a cute little bit here, and I got distracted from it. I'll say it, and then if they don't react... I love that Matt doesn't carry the weight.

He's like like okay. If they don't react we'll just edit it out. Along with Jake's slurs. Geez I'm gonna have to pay Connor extra this week. The bathtub donkey logo depicts a happy little guy taking a wash in the bathtub. He is not sleeping however as that would be illegal. They hated it, man. They hated it. Wait, explain it to me. No, I'm so done. It's pretty self-explanatory.

Basically, you can't have a donkey sleep in your bath. Yeah, that's a New York rule. That's why they named them so. Is that actually true? Oh yeah, you were writing, in your defence, you were writing your answer. I was writing my answer, sorry. And I'm pregnant, I don't know anything.

At all, at all, I don't even know what my fucking birthday is. If any New Yorkers are listening, you can go see the bathtub donkeys play on June 28th. Go throw eggs at them. Or July the 30th. They're playing the Sea Dogs and the Senators. That's a weird team name. The Senators is a weird team name.

That's stupid. That's like the least thing, animal you could get behind. Yeah. Is a Senator. What kind of animal would you like to get behind? Those bathtub donkeys sound pretty good. I guess it'd be different for you. You'd have to get in front of it.

No, I could, I could, um, I could peg. This is the, I think this is the weirdest episode by far now. There's someone about this room. Sorry. Here's the penultimate question, I can see Jake has been a coward this time. Aw, takey. Nah, well, if you don't want me to have fun, then I won't do you. No, I want you to have fun.

No, no, no, no. If you don't want me to do little silly things in your Google Docs, I won't. Wait, that was you having fun writing Big Hampton Blueys? It's my own little brand of fun. The vibe in every direction, we have a a weird energy don't you think? I'm staying at Jake's this week as well where in case you're worried Jake will be top and toe with me tonight so don't worry about it. We're cool. Just a little tiff we're having. Bit of fun. I can't see who's there, but I winked right at you.

Okay, so the... I actually like this podcast now. It's actually really fun normally. It's actually really fun. It's normally really fun. No, I am having fun. Are you No, I'm having fun. Are you okay? I'm having fun.

Cops! Cops! He leaned over me! Matt, you just got a message. New beer pioneer is great. Oh, that's nice. And an emoji of hands clapping. And that was from Steven Spielberg. Oh, that was, I just, I think I just had Berg on the phone. Oh, so Google just said, we found your pornos. No, no. We found your pornos?

Classic prank. Google Mike alert, we found your pornos mate. Oh that's a relief. I mean I asked them to find them weeks ago. Yeah that career is behind me now. Can I also say something here, Matt? Yeah. I've just gotten a text from I assume it's Goxie, but Goxie, have you changed numbers

that you've texted me from? Yes. Yeah. Yeah, he messaged. That was actually a really big point. Yeah, right. My phone ran out of power. We discussed it on stage in front of the whole audience.

Oh, I was. You were what? I was. Just looking away for a bit. Awesome. Brisbane people do not agree with me, I know that. Like, I come up here three, four times a year, I love it up here, and I always tell Brisbane people I love it.

When I meet Brisbane people around the place, I'm like, it's my favourite city. And they're always like, fuck off. Shut up, c***. Yeah. They don't buy it, they hate it. I'm like, I'm genuine, I love it. They're like, whatever.

You're like, c***, shut up. I'm serious, but yeah. Because it's like, it's the same way you tell a toddler, you're like, oh, I love your toy. Oh, that's such a, that's so cool. What does it do? Like no one goes to Melbourne is like, oh my God, I love Melbourne.

Coffee, they're just like, oh, cool place. But comes through and go, oh, look, you've got trees, do you? Oh, wow, you've got fences around your houses, wow. We know what you're fucking doing, c***, okay? I just love it up here. In your little city. Can artificial intelligence be a force for good? At the University of British Columbia, we believe it can. Dr. Raymond Ng and team are using AI to harness crucial data within the healthcare system

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