Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 145 - Brett Blake, Jordan Barr and Ray O'Leary

Episode Date: June 23, 2025

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features comedians Brett Blake, Jordan Barr and Ray O'Leary!Check out Matt's stand up special: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the titular Matt Stewart here letting you know that I'm coming to the UK. I'm doing a Bad Boy slash Who Knew It tour this September 2025. Heading to Edinburgh, Cambridge for the first time ever, Birmingham, Manchester, Swansea, my first ever show in Wales, and London. So yeah, those dates and tickets. All that info, mattstewartcomedy.com. On sale now, get involved, can't wait, we'll see you there.

["The Titchler"] Welcome to Who Knew It with Matt Stewart, the show where the guests write the wrong answers. I'm the Titchler, Matt Stewart, and our first guest is touring his show, Little Turd, up the east coast of Australia before heading to London and And right it's Brett Blake. Yes. Thank you for having me. It's actually little scallywag if I go to the when I go to the UK Like no one will know what turd means in the UK and I'm really and then we changed it

I was like, okay. Really? And then we changed it, which I, actually one of the ideas was shut the fuck up, Ray O'Leary, and get engrossed by a guy whose hair's been pushed down by his headphones in a weird way. Pull your hair to the side, you fucking clown. And now it's little Scallywag. Little Scallywag.

I'm swinging, I don't know why I'm so sorry, Ray. And it's so funny, it really changes the vibe of it. So will you be dressed as a pirate the whole time? What? What? What? Like Captain Metaswitch? It really changes the vibe of it. So will you be dressed as a pirate the whole time? No. No. No. Like Captain Metaswap. It's actually a kids show now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll have some serious undertones. I've gotten rid of all of them and then there's I sing three times during it. It's great. Our second guest this week is the host of Triple J's Weekend Breakfast. It's Jordan Barr.

Hi. Yes. Thanks for having me. Hey, thanks for being here. My pleasure. Are you heading back to Edinburgh this year? Nah, not a lot back in the country. Okay. She just got off a plane with her mental telehealth person.

As if she's gonna ruin $400 by going to Edinburgh. No, I'm not, but it'll be fun. You'll have a great time Scallywag. I think. All right, we've started bullying maybe 12 minutes in. What's the editor's name again? I wanna be cut out. Connor, we've started bullying maybe 12 minutes in. What's the editors name again? Connor, I want to be cut out of this episode.

Our third guest, you might have just heard his voice there, is going to be at the Newcastle Comedy Festival next month, it's Ray O'Leary. Yes, hello, hello, hello. Exciting. Yes, thank you. Up in Steel City. Yes, I've never been to Newcastle, we can't tell you anything about it

Because I go soon just a biggest case in this case see in the southern hemisphere. Wow, that's great. I'll check that out the Colonel race Nicholson Dress similarly multiple Johns's there's Maddie Johns Joey Johns and Daniel Johns, I believe I will band I heard one of them saying, I'm banned from Newcastle. Really? It was one of the Johns brothers who does reporting for Channel Nine. Which one's that one?

I think that's Matty. Matty and the- He's also the guy who's allegedly or not allegedly been done for stuff. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. He's done heaps of stuff. Cause someone goes, oh you up in Newy lately? He goes, oh no, I'm not allowed back in that town.

And then they cut live to him. Anyway, we're here for the Nitro Circus. So he said, he's like, oh, I'm not allowed in that town. He must have done some crooks here. It's Daniel Johns the Silver Cheer guy? Yes. OK, all right. And the other two are rugby league legends.

Oh, really? Oh, congrats, guys. Yeah. I had no idea. I know, I had no idea. I don't think they're related, though, somehow. Anyway, what are we talking about? Oh, yeahats guys. Yeah. I had no idea. I had no idea. I don't think they're related though, somehow. Anyway, what are we talking about? Oh yeah, you're in Newcastle. You're doing your show,

this year's show? Yes, yes. Laughter, I hardly know her. I'm going to Newcastle, going to Adelaide. I think I'm going to be announcing some new Australian dates. Please check it out. I'll be at Edinburgh. I have to change the name of the show. So I'm Chuckler.

Chuckler, I haven't been acquainted with her. I don't think I've ever been given more shit from a simple decision I've made, like, bronze on me every two minutes, like, oh, here comes the Scallywag. Fuck you. The Scallywag's great. I think it's good. I think it's really good. No, no, no, no, you guys have all made your mark. I apologise. I want calm. I think it's good. I do You guys have you all made your mark. I apologize

No one calm. I think it's better than turd. I think you've you've They have turds in the UK surely they would understand what that means I don't think it's I don't think it's a saying though like a little turd Yeah, but then they just little chicken you was being it. It's like God just literally they're like I was gonna tell a story When he did emaciated shit. Yeah. Dude, you look at me and you're probably like, he would actually spend an hour. He does the smallest shits you'll ever see. I guess, yeah.

Little pebbles. If I saw a show here called Little Poo, I'd be like, I don't want to see a poo show. Yeah. So I can see why they were like scallywagging, but I'm like, I'm not really sure what a scallywag is. It's like when New Zealand's finest, SheHad, the rock band, tried to break in America and they changed their name

because they were worried it sounded too much like G-Had. That's a genuinely true story. They changed their name to Pacifier. Oh, that's funny. And then Frenzel Ron briefly changed their name to SheHad. They're like, oh, it's free now. We'll take it. Bit of fun. Anyway, we haven't fricking started the show.

Okay, let's go, let's go. Sorry, man, didn't know I was on such time constraints. Hey, look, I'm enjoying it if you guys don't mind. I'm just- I was here to win. Yeah. On a game I'm very confused by. I'm gonna call with Jordan's doctor coming out.

You just go outside and start laughing for 15 minutes? She said, what? I don't know what. So the way the show works is ask a relatively obscure trivia question. Our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer. I then read their answers, while is the real one. I have to guess which one is correct. And the first question comes from a couple of listeners, actually.

They both sent this in separately. Danny Lopez, Rohina from Pueblo in Colorado and Ariane from Ireland and the question is what thank you Danny and Ariane for writing in thank you hope things turn around for you both I forget this bit you do um so a couple of comments last like really enjoying that bit Raiders what bit? I just know that your listeners are going through a lot of tough times. A genuinely miserable bunch of people and I'm just, I'm here for them. It's good that this is so supportive. So Danny and Ariane.

Nice to have some of that energy coming this way to look at Scallywagged anyway. The question is, what does crapuscula mean? What does crapuscula mean? I'll tell you what, you'd have to change it if you went to the UK, I can tell you that much. That's enough Ray! Jordan, what's that phone number? May I request it to be spelled? Is that okay? Yeah, if you want. That's going to make a big difference, is it? C-R-E-P-U-S-C-U-L-A-R.

Could you say it again one more time? Crepuscular. And while they're writing their answers, I'll explain how the scoring works. So you get one point if your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant and another point if you correctly guess the answer. By the way, I'm also playing as the house. I put in two of my own fake answers for each question. I get a point for each one of those that a guest choose.

So each of us can score up to three points per round which seems fair but the probability actually favours me the house and the house always wins though if you've listened to previous episodes you'll know that is not necessarily the case. Anyway most of our questions come from our great Patreon supporters and if you want to submit a question sign up on any level via patreon.com slash dugongpod which is linked in the show notes. Alright the answers are in here. Your options. Oh, well, here's your question. Even what does crepuscular mean?

Option one, it's a massive crepe option to fuck off, right? Option two, right? You can lock that in if you want to, but I was five other. I think it was he's like, that's Brett's answer. Fuck you. That's not true. Brett's already doing games and shit, which I like. He's getting in Ray's head.

He is actually. He's on the front foot here. Yeah. That's actually quite a grits. I'm always like a snake cornered. Because I'm confused by everything, I will lash out. I apologise. Don't tread on me.

Option two, the sticker. Always like a snake cornered. Because I'm confused by everything, I will lash out. I apologise. Don't tread on me. Option 2, the state of having atrophied muscles and being unable to move. Okay, Ray. Option 3, the little known sibling of nocturnal and diurnal, which means relating to twilight. Option 4, when meat is prepared real flat, thin and crispy. Option five, a minority constellation either comprised of fewer stars than a typical constellation or comprised of stars of lower luminosity. Or finally, it's the first shit you do when you get home after not shitting at all during school camp

Right you got first crack here They've actually given me three answers Like to that last one can fucking slide through. How many Brett's are playing? How many? They've actually given me three answers. Okay, I reckon, okay, I'm gonna guess that Brett did the last one about the school camp crap. I think Jordan Barr, oh, there was one in the middle. You've just gotta go, just so you don't confuse Brett too much. He's only needing to guess the correct answer. Okay, that's why I was like, oh god, the game's changed again.

I'm like, oh okay, so I've got to guess him. Like, fuck, I'm so stupid. I'd like to double or nothing please. Are you going for the Whammy? No, I think the correct- You could have a Whammy button. You could have a Whammy. I think the correct one is the one that I'm mentioning Nocturnal or Diurnal. Okay. Locking that in for Ray, what do you think Jordan?

The Twilight one. I love Twilight. The end. I do love Twilight, but I'm quite taken by the crepe one or the meat one too, where it's a crispy meat. Yeah, so you got thin meat, thin and crispy or a big crepe. Okay. I think I want it to be thin and crispy or a big crepe. Mm-hmm, okay. I think, I want it to be thin and crispy,

but I think, I think I'm gonna go with the Twilight one as well. All right. Apologies. Welcome that in. I can't believe that guy in Twilight was a vampire. That's crazy. The whole time. Oh, man, come on.

Oh, we haven't all seen this. Holy shit, how old are you? 17. Jesus. How long have you been 17? A while. Hot. No more questions, John. What?

I can say that. Thank you. Now, Matt, I can submit an answer, but also I can change and change the answer. And if I guess it right, I still get the point, don't I? I don't have to. Yeah, yeah, you submitted one. Yeah, you can pick any of the options here,

apart from your own. Okay. Apart from your own. Yeah. Okay. I like I do like the the even though it seems like I'm stealing Ray's Smartness right now, but I do like the the eyes one the fucking night and day. Yep, cuz it's like a craic Like a capillary that would make sense Yeah, cuz yeah Oh Yeah, cuz yeah Healery is open and close. Yeah, and then nine day. I'm assuming they fucking do that. Mmm So that makes the most logical sense to me. Okay, so you're going for the vampire one

Yes, that's the I one Which one was the I one the constellation one no night and day yeah, that was Twilight Yeah, so we're all in the same answer The different round An iris In the same spot though, let's see if you're right. Okay, he's who wrote the answers It's a massive crepe. That was Brett. Yeah The one about shitting crape that was Brett. Yeah, that's a point. Fuck it.

The one about shitting off the camp, that was Jordan. Did not see that going. The one that talked about constellations and luminosity, that was Ray. Really the other end of the spectrum from Jordan. Equally pointless answer and the one about flat meat. That was Ariane from Ireland. The question writer. I like the sound of flat meat. Yum.

Danny, the other question writer wrote the one about atrophied muscles. But that means you're all correct. It is relating to Twilight. Yes. A little known sibling of Nocturnal and Dione. Or did any of you know that or that was just a guess I knew that Yeah, I think I've heard the the ask you love There you go, it was one of those things where I was like because I used to say that word a lot when I worked

At the zoo. Oh Actually crepuscular, but then I'd forgotten because I haven't worked there for a year or something and then I was like I know this word. I'll wait until the end. Yeah. What animals were crepuscular? All cats. So they're like, they're always up really early in the morning and then like, like around twilight, like that's when they're most active.

So they kind of have two days. Yeah. Yeah. That's why like cats are crazy like 4am. They're sort of like, you know, like grind culture types. They're actually grind culture types. They actually turn 24 hours into two days. Yeah, yeah.

That's sick. Cats, big, love loving that. All right, so after one round, the scores are Brett on one point, Jordan on one point, the house on no points. Yes. Suck it house. Eat shit house. And Ray on one point. I feel like every time I've done this, the house on no points. Yes! Suck it house. Eat shit house. And Ray on one point.

I feel like every time I've done this the house has won. Yeah house is pretty good. Nah. Well I mean. Fucking swinging it. Unless you're sitting in front of a computer you're probably googling the answers. Well I know the answers. That might be true but yeah the house doesn't the house would win maybe a third of the games

I reckon okay, so maybe it is maybe that just happens to be when you're on but so far not so good for the house It's corpus is corpuscular a different word. Does that mean to do with stars and stuff? I feel like I've never seen who the word crap askuscular before. Corpuscular, small relating to a corpsicle. Corps... Corpuscle. Corpsicle. Wait, no. A dead isopropyl.

A small mass or body of cells forming a more or less distinct part such as the sensory receptors and nerve endings. Yeah, that's what I was thinking of. That's corpuscular. Of course. Took the words right into town, the tip of the tongue, wasn't it, Ray? Yeah, yeah. Corsioles.

Stars, cells, something like that. Yeah. We're all made of course. Took the words right into the tip of the tongue, wasn't it Ray? Yeah, yeah. Stars, cells, something like that. Yeah. We're all made of stars. Yeah, yeah. My show was nearly gonna be corpuscular. I hardly know it. Question two comes from Aspen Watts from London. The question is, which of these are real species of fish?

So you've just got to make up a fake species of fish. Don't have to describe it or anything. Just name an obscure-ish species of fish don't have to describe it or anything just name an obscure ish species of fish While you're writing your answers here's some more info on crepuscular Danny writes crepuscular animals are active during the twilight hours of dawn and dusk This time of day is referred to as crepuscular because it's when the light is soft and gray Crepuscular animals are found all over the world. Oh, like paying attention?

Some of the most common crepuscular animals include bats, rats and mice. However, there are also many other types such as rabbits, deer and even some birds. Crepuscular animals have several adaptations that help them to be active during the twilight hours. For example, many of these animals have large eyes that help them to see in low light conditions additionally crepuscular animals often have very sensitive ears that help them to hear prey or predators one of the most fascinating facts about crepuscular animals is that they are often more active during the full moon this is because the extra light of the moon helps these animals to see better.

Here we go. Saturn rising. Literally. Yeah, here we go. Jordan loves his shit. But also like, rampires. No, that's werewolves, isn't it? Werewolves fully.

But I never used to believe the moon shit ever or any of these. I don't really. But I like astrology. Actually, maybe I do believe. I don't really know. I saw something today where I was like, yeah, that checks out. I thought you and Irvi like text each other images of stones and stuff. We do but Irvi is like this is I will let this determine my day whereas I'm like I'll see what happens but um the moon stuff ever since I worked at the zoo and I used to work overnight at the zoo when

there was a full moon it was like crazy energy like the animals the moon for fishing as well Like yeah, if you're like a fisherman the moon really dictates what's happening. Yeah I don't know what to what effect but we're always like, oh fuck. It's a full moon or half moon or quarter moon Yeah, yeah, that was always a reflection of how much fish you're gonna catch. The fish are all Pisces so they were all Pisces All right the answer answer for question number two, which of these are real species of fish? The striped fanny. That's just good content.

The one footed anglerfish. Hyphen carp sucker. Apple crumble fish. Alexis nematode or the Prickly Pouncer. Dude, what was that sucker fish one again? Hyphen Carp Sucker. Jordan's go first this time. Oh, OK. The thing about fish is that they can be named anything.

Like some of them are just called like Stripey and some of them are like like the Stripe Fanny. Yeah. That could be. What is it? They call it the common some of them are like the Stripefanny. Yeah. That could be. What is it? They call it the common name and then they have the genus and species name. Yeah. There's like, yeah, there's so many of,

there was a fish, there's a fish called old wife because when it grinds its bones, it goes, ee, ee, ee. Oh my God, that's so good. It sounds like a- Have I used that before? That's so good. If I haven't, if I haven't, listen, someone send that in. Do my job for me, please.

I think I'm really, I think the striped fanny is really pulling me as it always does. Jordan's gay, everybody. Use flash. But there's something, cause they do always have those, but I feel like the carp, I'm like that's a legitimate thing. That's what's thrown me, some of those names are like, they're a part of- Anglerfish, that's a real, that's- Anglerfish, but that seems like a common name, you know what I mean?

Like that could be. Mmm. Are the Anglerfish the ones with the hook on their heads? No. The scary looking underwear ones. The light ones. The Finding Nemo ones. Yeah, I was about to say, is that the Finding Nemo one?

Yeah. I think, OK, I think I'm going to go... I think I'm going to go for the carp. Carp sucker? Yep. All right. Drawn to the carp sucker. Yep. Drawn away, pushed away from the fanny. Pushed away from the fanny. Carp sucker? Yep. Alright. Drawn to the carp sucker.

Yep. Drawn away, pushed away from the fanny. Pushed away from the fanny. Towards the sucker. Towards the sucker, what'd you believe? First time in a long time. The poor guy. He's sucking way down there, he doesn't know what's going on.

He's got a little light. Going over his head. Hell of an underbite. Too much teeth, brother. What do you think of Brett? I like the sucker one, which give us that one again. High fin carp sucker. See, that's high fin would be, that's too fucking.

And there was one more that was like more chill. Alexis Nemetow? No. Apple crumblefish? No, that's see, that's something that someone would put in there to fuck with you. The one footed anglerfish. Yeah. One.

Fanny and Prickly Pouncer. So which one's definitely a real one. I'm going to man. Now I came in swinging. I was like, I used to work for a fish. And I'm like, please say fish fingers. Sometimes, yeah. And a bit of, please say fish fingers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes, yeah, and a bit of knowledge just gets you into more trouble because you're like,

Yeah, I reckon. You're feeling the pressure now. I reckon I'm going to go the angler fish, the sucker. One footed angler fish? Yeah, I reckon that's real. All right. I don't know why, fuck. No, it feels real because I'm also like,

why has it got one foot? Yeah. And why would you say that? and they I feel like people who name fishes like they're smart in many ways But they're kind of stupid with names. Yeah, they're all stupid They're all the dumbest pricks I've ever met That's not true I love you guys don't hurt me. Oh very farty people. I'm so torn between I want to like was it the Alexa Nematode yes, see like what Alexis and Alexis Yeah, cuz I was thinking do they name it after the Amazon Alexa thing cuz I don't know

Just name you like you say they name fish weird things. Yeah. Yeah, well, you know, there's like species of bugs named after Arnold Schwarzenegger Because you look muscly okay, I named after Arnold Schwarzenegger and stuff. True. Because he looked muscly. Okay, the other one that's pulling me is I think the striped fanny sound, it sounds fake but not fake enough. Like it sounds like he's crying a sweet spot. It's like, yeah, it is right at the sweet spot.

And it's something fishy, like I've got to fuck another striped fanny boy. They would love saying that. But also, fanny in America means bum. Bum. Yeah, so true. And it used to be a name. Right. It's so funny. Is nematode a type of snail? Yeah, I was trying to remember what even is a nematode.

Is it one of those weird little sponge creatures? It's a small snail. Oh. They might have an aquatic version of that. Yeah. Because, yeah, there's a little, I think they're called anyway. Oh, what are the ones that you can send up into space and freeze and stuff? And you know, astronauts.

What's a Katy Perry? Or I would have locked in Stripe Fanny. Stripe Fanny? All right, locking it in. I think they they they changed Fanny to Franny in like, Eden and Blotten books. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's too funny. It's so funny. I noticed that as well. Kids do.

Big flan of Eden. Big flan. Big flan, but. A flan, fuck damn it. I'm not. I'm a smart arsehole. I'm one of the sifters. I mean, honestly, I just read, I read the headline.

I don't, I don't read, I don't read the famous hard books or anything. I don't read the famous books or anything. I don't read famous books. Alright, so Ray's locked in. Here's who wrote the answers. Prickly Pouncer, that was the house. Oh nice. Alexis Nemetode, that was Brett. And I liked that you were playing a little game there. I did, I nearly baited you because Nemetode is actually a sea creature but the Alexis

part is not. Yeah yeah yeah. That's good stuff. I knew that would fucking get you Ray and I was like here we go. I'm real in and out of here. Going fishing. Apple crumblefish that was Aspen aka the house. Thank you for writing in Aspen, I hope things work out.

Ray went for the striped fanny, that was Jordan. Oh, you anti-crickety as well. I was torn between both your options, god damn it. Fuck, I forgot Jordan's an actress or whatever. I'm a snake. She's a snake in the grass. She was very good play that, damn it. Brett went for the one footed anglerfish, that was Ray.

Hell yeah brother. Oh wait, Brett. That's right, fished in a bogan. Jordan is correct, it's hyphen carp sucker. Oh, that was my second one. So wait, I get a point for tricking Ray as well. Yes. Oh, this is great, I love this.

But I can't get too cocky because we've still got the rest of the game. Now you aren't going to trust me at all. I can't say anything. I'm not even going to talk to you. That's how annoyed I am with how good of an actor I am or what you are. I was like, fuck. So convincing.

So after two rounds the scores are House still yet to score, Brett on one, Ray on two, but out in front on three points is Jordan Barr. Thank you. That's right. You ratted a point because you fucking tricked me. Yeah, you're my sworn enemy now. Jordan, do you want to form an ally? Please don't. Question three comes from Dave Warnocky from Melbourne. Oh, I know that guy.

Yeah, that name rings a bell. I hope things turn around for them. I have a feeling they won't. Dave's question is, track 3 on Dave Groene and the Coral Snakes 1995 album, the soft and sexy sound, has a space name. What's the title? So it's just a song title that's got a vague space theme from 1995. I'm going to go see Dave Groene and Colossal Snakes play this album next month. Can't wait. Really? So are they like a Melbourne based band? Yeah, Melbourne based band. I think an Adelaide band originally.

Oh. Slash Brit, relocated to Britain I think. But they're playing the corner, can't wait. While you're on your answers, here's a bit more information about that fish. According to Aspen, this is a fish found in the Midwestern and Southwestern USA. It's a silvery fish that feeds on sandy and gravelly bottoms of lakes, much like a catfish. They get the name from having a very long dorsal fin, which can be as tall as the fish's long, about 27 centimetres. When males become ready to mate at the age of three, they develop nuptial tubercles,

which are noticeable skin roughness or horny nodules, which Aspen just thought was a funny combination of words. And I appreciate that, Aspen, I think you're spot on. Yeah, absolutely, you nailed that one, Aspen. I also enjoyed the phrase feeds on sandy and gravelly bottoms. Sounds crunchy. All right, the answers are in. Question number three.

Tracks around Dave Grane in the Coral Snakes 1995 album, the soft and sexy sound had a space theme. What is its title? Here are your options. Uranus is shiny. Come on, Ray. Option two. I press the space spacebar now I'm stuck on the moon option three milking the Milky Way option for Apollo 69 I wanted to be that

option five spacey Jane must die oh or finally your anus or mine? Your anus or mine? Uranus or mine? Uranus or mine? Your anus? Has anyone ever pronounced it your anus? You know the planet your anus? Anytime I see like space people talking about like the planets, they always say Uranus. And I'm'm like, oh really running over that one Oh, it's Uranus. Yeah, come on. Come on guys. Give us this one

Please one for the working class. Thank you Thank you and make a decision about Pluto fuck. Yeah. All right, Brett. What do you reckon man? I feel like Dave's done a cheeky boy thing where it's something kind of funny is the answer. And then we've all gone like, oh, let's fuck with the cysts. But then the ones that we've come up with are somehow less worse than what they actually are. Yeah. So therefore, I have to go with the Uranus one, because that seems the most aggressive. Uranus is shiny or Uranus or mine. There's two Uranus

I reckon Uranus or mine Uranus or mine. Yeah, I feel like that's that's a beautiful question 90s 90s Uranus or mine People like your place on mine. Yeah, people were talking about butts and stuff in the 90s I don't know they discovered yeah all the other options are quite aggressive like milking the Milky Way that is disgusting maybe it's that I don't know there's something about it feels like it says like you're wanking off the Milky Way oh yeah right you. Like you're milking it. I thought it yeah I took it as more like... Is that what anyone else thought? No. I didn't see it with the gesture. Yeah just imagine a big constellation or a Ryan's belt or whatever. Someone's pulled down a Ryan's belt and jacking off.

Whatever constellations under there really. Yeah that's the first the first verse. Pulling down a ride's belt. I reckon, if it's not the answer, I reckon we gotta hit record. What was the first answer again? Uranus is shiny. And the second one? I press the space bar now I'm stuck on the moon. I don't know if they have.

That fucking feels like something some space clean guy would love as well. Did they have that fucking feels like something some space clean guy would love as well they have a spacebar in the 90s yes on a computer yeah why'd you look at right the guy used to work for a fishing TV show when do you reckon the space pass were invented you're like thinking about a mouse or something I like I know I now now I'm like no they had you got computers When do we get computers in the 80s in the 90s everything was a run-on sentence I guess they had typewriters before as well fuck I didn't know I didn't know every day is a new lesson

No, I think it's a great question. Thank you. When did they get space bus? I'm gonna Google that out to find out after we lock in our answers Now I'm going towards space bar. Just fuck now. I'm out. Please have the list again sure can Uranus is shiny. I press the space bar now suck on the moon milking the Milky Way Apollo 69 Spacey Jane must die or Uranus or Mine. Well Spacey Jane Must Die is not one because I don't think they were born when this album

came out. So Spacey Jane the band, that wasn't named after a thing that was around in the 90s. Oh that's so true. Like the space bar used to be called the spacey James Maybe they were named after this track like Rolling Stone. Mmm, you know, yeah I don't fucking know and I Brett you've I've tentatively locked in Uranus or mine He's I wanted to be that so I may as well go out having fun. What do you mean? Like Rolling Stone is it are they named after? Bob Dylan song. Oh like like a Rolling Stone great song.

Yeah. Powder Finger named after a Neil Young song. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, that's fun, yeah. It's pretty common. Yeah. And Radiohead are named after something. Yes, I think Talking Heads.

Yeah, I can't. Not really. Love to win. Imagine Dragons? Yes. Just a great band. Pfft. Pfft.

Pfft. Are they the one whose parents own Christmas Island? No, no, that's, that's, set, Geronimo, they're those guys. What are they called? Shepherd. Shepherd.

Their parents own an island. No, their parents own, their parents are in charge of security for detention centers Oh, they own like Wilson security or some shit. It's fucked the car parts allegedly Yeah, but Wilson security also run the security So they run the detention centers isn't that crazy that is well, but they are a really bad band as well Can we lock them up on that fucking island? I hate that song it's so lame.

Imagine if Shepard are all in the car on tour somewhere listening to the podcast. They're like, we're gonna have a great show tonight. Grab that wheel and yank it to the right brother. I'm sure I've also mixed up lots of little bits of information. And they're like yeah their dad basically runs that place and kills people. What do you reckon, Ray? Apollo 69. Yeah, okay.

Locked in for Ray. It's gotta be something silly, after considering the option. I'm thinking milk in the milky way, because I reckon they were pissing themselves laughing writing that, and they were like, this is funny. But then but then also maybe they was acting out pulling a Ryan's bill. Yeah Such a wide guy Whatever so really what is it it could be small

Yeah, I'm gonna milk in the Milky Way in Here's who wrote the answers. Uranus is shiny. That was Jordan. Thank you. Oh. I pressed the spacebar.

Now I'm stuck on the moon. That was the house. Oh. Man, last night when I came up with that, I'm like, this is good stuff. It was about 2am. I'm like, oh, I think I'm onto something here. This will get him. Spacey Jane must die. That was Ray O'Leary'm like, oh I think I'm onto someone here. This'll get him. Spacey Jane must die, that was Ray O'Leary. Yeah, you're right, I completely forgot what year we were in.

I was just trying to think of a space thing, I was struggling. I think I gave you plausibility. Yeah you did, you were defeating me, thank you so much. I always try and defend. Yeah, no thank you, thank you. I have nothing against Spacey Jane, I've never even heard their music before. I think Jordan would be a big ambassador of them. Aren't they a big Hottest 100 type band?

They're big. They're a big band. WA represents. What do their parents do? Are they? Yeah, I don't know. I think they're normal. They own Rottnest Island and they're in charge of all the quackers over there. Okay, that's all. That's actually quite nice. It's adorable. That's pretty sweet. Yeah, yeah.

Jordan went for Milk in the Milky Way. That was Brett. Sucked in. Fuck. Because you did, you went full in. Yeah, I did what you did to me. How do you do it? You're in full riff space on that? Dude, I only do stuff that I've got a riff on. I'm like, yeah, talk about Orion's belt. And that means Ray is correct. It's Apollo 69. Oh, holy moly. What?

Oh, thank you, thank you. A beautiful song. Can't wait to hear. It's Apollo 69. Oh, holy moly. What? Thank you. Thank you. A beautiful song. Can't wait to hear it live. Apollo 69. And also, I've quickly... The earliest known example of a space bar was in 1843. What? So they had them in the 90s? Was there someone pushing it while they can chisel away or something?

Space bar and the tablet, yeah. What do you think the 1800s were? Like caveman times? Chiseling away? They did that at the printing press, I guess. Is that true, true? The house is finally on the board there, with thanks to Brett and Ray and Jordan. Also get points there. Sorry, not Ray and Jordan. Ray and Jordan also get points there. Sorry, not Ray and Jordan, Ray and Brett, I should say. I wasn't going to say anything.

So after, at the halfway mark, the house is on one, Brett's on two, but out in front on three points a piece, it's Jordan and Ray. What? I thought I was still losing. Oh well, yes, great. You're still doing great, Jordan. You've been winning the whole time. Still losing. Still losing. You're a...

This is such a sad note. No wonder you're getting telehealth calls all the time. And then mental chair. Ray, could you please send your message from the listeners instead to Jordan for a moment? Yeah, that's a perennial underdog status in your mind. Question four, again, comes from two different listeners Stephanie Magnolia from Concord in New Hampshire and Britta Shurtleff from Utah

Keep it up keep smiling And Stephanie and British question is what is the in what is the interesting name of the activist who has run in every US presidential election since 1992? So you just got to come up with it. It's a it's a person's name. You just got to name a person, but it's a it's a bit of a out of the box kind of name. You know, his name's not John Daniels or something. You know what I mean? Crack up.

It's a slightly unusual name. And while you're writing your answers, here's some of the lyrics from Apollo 69. It's the lyrics. I love the song. I've never read the lyrics before. And I do not understand what the song's about, but I love it. Pioneers and diggers, psychedelic visitors.

Dune buggies appear like ponies on a cliff. Like a wagon train to the stars. Coyote's whale. This coffee stinks. Hey, let's roll on to Mars. Houston, where's the Sea of Tranquility? I am not reading you. Yeah, those Reds are up to something. You know they've got Rasputin's brain wired up to one of their missiles? What? Yeah, it's a black one. Kind of like the pack leader, Castro. Man, he's hot for the main feature.

Dine a shove his cigar into the yellow sugar cane. I like it. I like it a lot as well. I don't know if I could make heads nor tails of it. No. There's not enough song talking about warning us about the Reds anymore. Absolutely. Yes, even in the 90s, the Reds, I think were a huge scare.

Hey, while you're still running your answers, let's go for a quick break. And we're back and the answers are in for question four. What is the interesting name of the activist who has run in every US presidential election since 1992? Vernon Love Supreme, that's option one. Dank John Jansen, option two. Joseph Seagal, option three, option four. Benjamin Tressengrass Jr., option four. I'm thinking of a junior,

that means he's got wealth, doesn't it? Yeah, he's got a junior, that means he's got wealth doesn't it? Yeah he's got a dad alright here we go. He's definitely got a dad that guy. Option five Philip J. Philanderer or finally Adolf Mugabe. Whoa dude there's a lot going on with that one. That one is clearly made up. I think it could be it. Yeah, it could be it. Plug in five everyone. Okay, dream kid name, let's go. You choose the first name, I'll choose the second name. Go. Certainly someone's making a strong point with that. What do you think, Ray?

I think it is. I think it's got to be Vernon Love Supreme. Beautiful name. It's a beautiful name. Beautiful name. Beautiful man. Vernon. Because obviously, I reckon the person who's done, who's run in every political thing, he's obviously wants to be popular or cool.

So he would have definitely would have changed his name to something ridiculous that would stand out on the ballot paper that people who were like me would go yeah potato 69 potato 69 that's a beautiful name for boy oh yeah it's gender-neutral yeah it does make me think of pizza as well. I love supreme. I love supreme. And vermin? Is it vermin or vermin? Vermin. Oh vermin. I might have said vermin did I? I was worried about that. It's vermin. Vermin. Which makes me think less about pizza. Although Splinter of the Ninja Turtles. Oh yeah. I know it. You all made it sound like that was a great... Really good points. That's a really interesting and good point. It's added more than it's subtracted from the conversation, I feel. So you're sticking with Vermin?

Yes, all right. Yeah, I will. Yeah, Vermin, I was like, yes, Vermin. I'm like, mmm. You're sucked in. You're locked it in. I'm gonna lock it in now. You can't change it.

And then what was it? There was a Benjamin... Benjamin Tressengr it in. I can't change it. And then what was it? There was a Benjamin Benjamin Tressen grass jr. Tressen grass Sounds like yeah, you were saying you like the last one Adolf Mugabe was last. Yeah, I like that cuz I like those guys. I like their body Also, don't know what is it Robert Mugabe? Yeah Is he do something fucked as well?

Was it Zimbabwe? I don't know. I don't know. I think you shared a mustache style with Adolf. I think so. It's such a strange decision to make to like whether like, of course, I ended up being like dictators, but also like to just have that mustache. It's so weird. I would love to see the alternative reality where Hitler never existed.

Yeah. Does that mustache still exist? Yeah. Because it feels like such a bizarre choice, but maybe it's where we're associating with him, maybe it'd be quite common because I mean, I've had nearly every other kind of facial hair Combination never gone with that one. You haven't tried it mainly because it's quite blonde in the middle It doesn't really you can't see which he would have loved actually

All right, Connor you make a judgment call on this sort of riff Well, I'm just trying to think the opposite of Adolf Mugabe would be Robert Hitler, which is Well, the Hitler mows my lawn, you know, yeah Can't afford to go to the deep pole fine. He told us it was a Roman salute. It's fine. They're windmills. They're windmills. There was some French name in there as well. So sorry. Dank John Jansen, Joseph Seagal.

Dank John Jansen. I think it's Dank John Jansen. Dank John Jansen. And Dank is fun, isn't it? Dank is fun. Dank is good. Alright, locking that in for Jordan. Man, this is stressing me out, this one.

I don't know why. I don't know why. It's all the talk of Adolf Mugabe. Yeah, just making myself excited. Really jeeing me up. There was Joseph something or other. Joseph Seagal. That sounds like a director.

He is an actor. Yeah, Steven Seagal. Steven Seagal. Steven Seagal. Oh mate, yeah maybe Steven Seagal. Okay, 90s, yeah. Feels like a trap. My brain went to Joseph Stiglitz,

who I think is a famous economist. Oh yeah. Of course. Yes, the famous economist. You don't just wear a suit and tie for show Can I get the first two options again for them and love supreme and dank John Jansen, it's I reckon vermin love supreme locked in because it just I don't know why it seems very 90s and and people can change their names and like he might have changed it for the ballot

Yes feels I think you're right. I think love supreme is so 90s and Vermin is kind of vermin not Vernon. That's what's fucking me. All right, I'm jumping shit. I'm with Jordan bar All right. Thank John Jansen. Yeah final answer Yes, sorry, I thought you were gonna release the answer I just had a stroke the answers Adolf Mugabe that was right Leary what yeah that makes sense you freak Philip J. Philanderer that was the house. Oh that's a nice one. Philanderer did not seem like that.

Yeah, not ideal. I mean there was that guy Anthony Weiner who ran for office all the time. And then he ended up being like a weird sex guy. He keeps showing people photos of his dick. Yes, which is so funny. Yeah, which some people think may have undermined Hilary's campaign and led to Donald Trump being responsible for a lot.

I thought you were going to say undermine his. Some people thought that undermined his career. His dick has destroyed the foundations of America. The dick that broke democracy. Wow. The dick that launched a thousand ships. Hey ladies, do you want to see the dick that launched a thousand ships? Benjamin Tressengrass Jr. that was Jordan. I do want to say it was trees and grass and I...

Sorry it's Matt's fault you can't spell. Me going and that one that I like is it trees and grass? Even that's subtle. It was so sucked. I was like, damn, well there it's been, no, I actually really like Tressengrass because it sounded like, it sounded like people could call him Trees and Grass as a joke if he was a real man. Anyway, that was, I forgive you. Okay. I was having the same thing when he said Adolf, I was like, it's Adolf. I had to look up the when he said Adolf. I was like, it's Adolf. It's Adolf.

I had to look up the spelling of Milky Way before. Likey way? I was like, no, you fucking idiot. Joseph Seagal. That was Brett. Oh, I liked that one. Yeah, just little subtle one. I thought maybe 90s action star might throw you off.

And I was also watching a Steven Seagal film last night. It was sick. Dank John Jansen, which Jordan and Brett went for, that was the house. I'm afraid Vermin loves Supreme as correct. No! Like fuck! What does he look like? I think he dressed like a wizard I believe. Yes.

Oh so you know this one? Yeah I knew it. Oh you played that very nicely then. Yeah. Very nicely indeed. That's why I just didn't listen to ask to list the options again. I was like I know it's the first card Look, he's wearing a boot on his head. Oh, that's it. He wears a boot not a wizard hat. No, no Well, I mean you forget. He does look like a gumboot wizard though. He carries it like a wizard. Yes He's got a Gandalf-y kind of beard. Looks like he's wearing a pies used to be do they used to be a meme about her boss? He's a big pause man

He's big he's actually in the cheer squad He would fit right He really does carry the boot like a wizard hat. I like him I like his energy supreme's good. So it's very nice to the used to be a meme about him or Mistaken for some reason maybe he became popular on Reddit back when I first started. Right, back in your Reddit days. Oh you were there at the beginning of Reddit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was there.

Did they have a spacebar back then? That was a real hard time. Is it like that with his lasers coming out of his nipples or whatever? Is that the meme? That was the meme, but I did make that image. I took that photo. It's cool that you can do that. Alright so, woo the house really did well in that round thanks to Dank John Jensen. And after four rounds the scores are now bred on to Jordan the house on three but out in

front on four points is Ray O'Leary. Congratulations Ray, must be nice being at the top. I'm mad. Thanks guys. Question five again. I think everyone's doing great. I think everyone's doing fantastic. You have a good attitude about it. Positive attitude. Damn this is fucked. And that you knew that answer as well that helped. Yeah that does also help knowing the answer. Let's go team, all right? I'm gonna bash Ray early with this. Question five comes from James Edward from London as well as Siraj from the Cow.

Keep it up team, I love what you're doing. Things are gonna work out. Their question is, what is the main attraction at the Jorvik Viking Centre, which is a museum in York in England? It's the main attraction at a- A Jorvik? Jorvik. It's a Viking museum in England.

What's the main attraction? What's the main exhibit people go to visit? And what- While you're writing your answers, here's some more info about Vermin Love Supreme. According to Stephanie Magnolia, one of the question writers, he has campaigned for his presidential runs with different political parties over the years. He has promised a pony for every American to bring awareness of the zombie apocalypse, to pass a law requiring everyone to brush their teeth, and that there will not be a breed of flying monkeys created

to enforce the law. He has glitter bombed opponents. Ask the candidate who supported the use of torture, whether fluoride should be added to the waterboarding water. Oh, maybe he's not a cool guy. I think he's taking the piss out of there. Yeah, well, that is, I mean, I support fluoridation, but that is a pretty funny question. Yeah.

Wait, maybe I missed it. He asked the guy who did support it, an opponent who supported it. Who supported torture. Do you support adding fluoride to the waterboarding water? That's a bit of fun. Honestly, that's when he won me over. I like that. That's funny as well.

He's for clean, good teeth. Yes, exactly. He's very obsessed with the teeth. Even for torture victims. He lost me at the flying monkeys, but he gave me at the fluoride. Yeah. That's funny. That is a good answer.

Yes. What is it? When a city refused him a permit to have a right to pony demonstration outside of a Hillary Clinton book tour event, he sued the city and the court found in his favour. Earlier this year, he walked into a Ron DeSantis campaign event, put himself up on the stage and got the crowd chanting before DeSantis security escorted him out. Okay, he's amazing.

Yeah, I think I'm into him. I look forward to the messages telling us why we shouldn't be but... Oh yeah, haven't you heard what he... but no. Based on that, which is everything I know about him. Yeah, yeah, I think I think I speak on behalf of the group when I say we stand by every single thing this man has ever said or done. Yeah, no matter what. I'm back at him. Yeah. And into the future. Yeah.

And the boot. Yeah. Everything he has said or will ever say or do. Well, it sounds like he's a sort of a Lord Buckethead figure as well. Oh, who's the UK guy who I think I might. He might have been a previous question, actually. What is that? What did Lord Buckethead do? So he always runs.

I don't know. He runs in every election in the UK. And I think he runs and always like a pretty prominency, like the prime minister's running in or whatever. So we like, you know, Theresa May has been announced as winning her local election or whatever He there's a guy in a like dress like Darth Vader standing off to the side like waiting to hear the results All right, my god the answers are in question before but not a question here Love I'll take every opportunity to use that word, which is always at this point of the show.

So here it is. What is the main attraction at the Yorvik Viking Center, which is a museum in York? An eight inch piece of fossilized Viking extra excrement. Oh, not bad. Nice. No, we're talking around all in. Option two, a thousand year old hammer made from stone and badger bones.

Badger bones. Badger bones. Fun to say. I forgot about badgers. Well, there they are. There they are. Badger bones. Never forget. Option three, a rare Viking helmet that actually features horns. Cool.

Option four, an interactive axe throwing exhibit. Option five, a big petrified horse from the era, era, affectionately called Booty. What's petrified mean? Is it like mummified or something? I think petrified is like fossilised or... Yeah, there's a petrified mean? Is it like mama pharasa? I think petrified is like fossilised or... Yeah, there's a petrified... That's a really terrifying horse. What's that?

Yeah, it's very skittish, this horse. It kicks. That's why you need the Viking helmet. We've got to roam it around the museum. There's a big shark near Geelong that's petrified. It's just in a big thing of jelly. And it's a big shark near Geelong that's petrified. It's just in a big thing of jelly. And it just is a big great white shark. I think it's called like Pearl or something.

But it was like in an abandoned like theme park. And then people were just walking around and then they walked in. So there's like big great white shark in a big blue jelly, which is cool. And how did that happen? I don't know, they like preserved it, like somebody caught, like they found a dead shark and then put it in there and put all this like resin and shit around it and so it's trapped,

like with its mouth open. In my head it was like, it'd been, like I don't know what happened, but it was alive and then all of a sudden it got petrified. And got scared, like Harry Potter. He just got scared it got petrified. And got scared like Harry Potter. He just got scared. Well I wasn't thinking like Harry Potter. I don't really support that universe.

Oh of course. Sorry as an ally I don't do that children but maybe it's something to consider. The final option. A mummified yak penis. The Vikings believe symbolised renewal and that if you touched it, it would boost fertility. Well, that's true. That is true. Well, that one's true, but is it housed at the Yorvik Viking Center?

We know it exists. You just find that at the Royal Women's Hospital. You don't have to go to the Yorvik Viking Center. Everyone rubs it. Yeah, the knob of it is very shiny. Yeah. All right, Jordan, it's your crack first. So here are your options.

Fossilise excrement, badger bone and stone hammer, viking helmet with horns, interactive throw, axe throwing exhibit, petrified horse named booty, or mummified yak penis. Hmm, I think the, if the yak penis existed, I would know about it. I would have been DM'd by now. Alright guys, people text me on the Triple J hotline they are very yak penis oriented. They're yakkin' for yak. Um I yeah I don't think that one's real even though I want it to be but they because they have Rasputin's, well they it's actually not his penis, but there is like a museum that reckons they have it

But I think that is a museum of penises second time Rasputin's come up today He's he was name-checked in Apollo 69. He was yeah. Yeah Okay, I relevant as always relevant as always King the my king they should make another song you're in King like known for Anyway, I've been known for just finger blasting. Yeah, but and also he was thought to have like a magic dick like a yeah Yeah, but people used to send their wives to him to get him to relax Really? Yeah

Yeah, so rasp eatingin was his fuck out. Yeah, he was really into orgies and shit. Yeah, it was crazy. He used to go to, but he also- He was also a monk or something? Yeah, yeah, he seemed kind of gross. He seemed like someone that you're like, you're good at sex, but in a weird way.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, you're like, I don't like that you're good at this. Ew. Ew, freaks me out. I didn't like that you're good at this. Eww. Eww, freaks me out. I didn't trust that, Carl. He learned the dark arts in a weird way. He did.

I think it's, it could be the helmet, but I feel like, okay, I think it's the axe throwing. Axe throwing, right. Yeah. Locked in. What do you think, Brett? I want it to the axe throwing. Axe throwing, right? Yeah. Locked in. What do you think, Brett? I want it to be the shit or the dick.

The shit is good. The shit is good. But mummified shit, like a shit would break down pretty quickly. Fossilised shit. Fossilised shit. So I feel like a turd would break down after like a year, you know what I mean? Unless there was a fucking volcano. It would have to be, yeah, the right.

Is it white? Yeah, it had to be white. You also couldn't fossilize a shit because when these people die, it's just bones that live. Yeah. It's not like there's a turd in their guts or whatever. What if somebody fossilized around it? How big was his dick? The yak penis doesn't say yak penis,

but it was thought to boost fertility. See, they seem like they're a very fertile pee. I'm going the I'm going the yak dick, dude. So you're not you're not only think it's real, but you think it worked. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You think they're right to believe that? Yes. I want you think it worked. Yeah. Yeah. You think they're right to believe that? Yes. I want to touch this penis.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you've just got to go to the Jorvik Viking Center. I'm going to. If you're correct. In York. You could go. I could go. I'm going to Edinburgh. I'm coming. This little scallywag's going to be sniffing around that yaks, Dick. We can go for a little trip together.

I really want to go see the statue of David Hume in Edinburgh, the old Scottish philosopher. Anyway, what about his dick? He's got a very shiny crotch. If you see that statue. So you can get fossilised poo. It's called coprolite, I want to say. But yeah, I don't believe because the Vikings, I feel like they lived recently enough that you probably could, it couldn't be a fossil by now. Surely. Right. Surely.

Wouldn't you have to like, you know, dinosaurs, I don't mean, I don't know how far you're calling, calling it out on a technicality. Yeah. The petrified one. I, I was going to say the X-throne as well. I was leaning towards X-throne, but a part of me is like, would a museum make it central? Would the big thing about the museum be like just a fun activity? Like I think that's what museums have to do now because no one gives a fuck. It's like hey you want to see sharks in 3D? We're playing avatar! But it's like come to the art gallery we've got a bowling lane coming. I imagine the acts are like

historically accurate as well. You're picturing ones you get from bunnings. But I think these would be probably made of badger bones. Maybe you'd make your own axe. Yeah, that's true. That's classic museum activity. It's a blacksmith's horse and then you can throw it. I'm definitely detouring when I'm over there to go. Go to Yorvik. You're true. Alright, I'm going to say, oh yeah, okay, the Viking helmet, the Viking helmet which

actually had horns on it. Okay, locked in? Oh, that can't be right. What's wrong with the horns, Beez? That can't be right. So fucking important. I feel like we'll find out that the Vikings never wore horns as well. No, that's what the clue said, it's the only one that ever actually had horns.

Yeah, that's the only one. But anyway, yeah, I'm going to lock in the helmet. Go on the horns. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. A big petrified horse, affectionately called Booty. That was Jordan. Thank you.

Yeah, I tried to help myself out with the shark, but it didn't fucking work. I liked it. Naming the horse Bo booty was your downfall. Well that's why you know the staff at the museum are trying to having a bit of fun. The only thing I can think of when I think of museum is is far lap. We have a big stuffed far lap in Melbourne. Yes and in Wellington we had the bones of far lap. Yes and cameras got the heart. And I think I've you combine them together. I think I've maybe the heart. Yes. And I think... Have you combined them together? I think I've maybe... More powers combined. Yeah, I think they have to do that

otherwise that vampire fire comes back. So then a thousand-year-old hammer made from stone and badger bones was the house. Badger bones, there's a fun fact about them that people used to use the bad badger bone dick as like a it's like a tie clip oh no way yeah that's kind of like that learned that from Andy Matthews and Al Cetrombo virtual they got a lot of fun facts bad dicks but you just a literal bone in it which is interesting yeah I was gonna say I was I don't remember that. You don't remember that? How many badges are you staring at? I don't remember that. With the badges, toffee?

George, just before you were saying you forgot they even existed. I don't know, I was like... It's all coming back to you now. It's all coming back, in many ways. That's what that Celine Dion song's about. Ray went for a rare Viking helmet that actually features horns. That was the house, I'm afraid. Of course. Mummified Yak penis, which Brett went for a rare Viking helmet that actually features horns. That was the house, I'm afraid. Oh, you got me.

Mummified yak penis, which Brett went for. That was Ray. Damn it. You knew you were drinking with a dick, wouldn't you? And Jordan nearly went for it as well. I did. Jordan went for an interactive ax throwing exhibit. That was Brett.

Oh, fuck. Meaning the correct answer. Brett, you were close to getting it. An eight inch piece of fossilized viking excrement. Oh, get out. Get fucked. Fossilized feces. And you were right.

You had the fact of the coprolite. It's actually known as the Lloyd's Bank coprolite. Cause it was found where it became at Lloyd's Bank. Lloyd Legford's house. So what does that mean? That's another point for the house, a point for Ray and a point for Brett. Great. If I would have said that quicker, everyone but Jordan gets a point. That's a more efficient way of saying that. You were still winning Jordan. Well you were winning.

I was winning. Well you're coming equal third now. Ah, out of four. Brett and Jordan on three points. The house on four points about in front. It's Ray on five points. But of course the final round is worth triple points or still truly anyone's game.

Anyone's game Ray. All right, the final question. This comes from David Malofsky of London. And the question is what? I'm so sorry David but. David you gotta go see Brett's show at the Bill Murray in London please come this is very one-on-one marketing now it's just this guy just one guy only if I see anyone else in this podcast yeah I'm gonna say also my messages to Matt are so grim looking at

my face where there's just log messages from me with no reply. Hey, I hope it gets better, eh? So the question is, what is the synopsis of the 2006 film Peaceful Warrior? What is the synopsis of the 2006 film Peaceful Warrior? So yeah, you're probably, you're writing a paragraph here, three, four, five sentences, something like that. And while your answer is being written, here's some more info about that shit fossil.

It's known as the Lloyds Bank coprolite and it's named from the location where it was uncovered. According to Wiki, it's a large coprolite or fossilised specimen of human faeces recovered by the York Archaeological Trust while excavating the viking settlement of Yorvik, present-day York, in northern England. The specimen was dated around the 9th century and offers insight into the dietary practices of vikings during this period. The coprolite was found in 1972 beneath the site of what was to become the branch of Lloyds Bank on Pavement Street or whatever, Pavement

in York, and may be the largest example of fossilised human feces aka paleo feces that's ever been found measuring 20 centimetres or 8 inches long and 5 centimetres or 2 inches wide. Analysis of the stool has indicated that its producer subsisted largely on meat and bread despite evidence suggesting that other people at the time and place had access to fruits, leeks, shellfish and nuts. The stool had undergone mineralisation unlike some other human coprolites which are preserved by desiccation. The presence of several hundred parasitic eggs suggests the person was riddled with intestinal worms. Oh yeah. How embarrassing. They're like...

Several hundred eggs in your shit? Yeah. Man, they must be mortified. They'd be petrified if they knew that everyone was hearing about their business all these years later. It does, like, it does add a human element to history, seeing someone having a bad shit, and it's been preserved forever. That guy's probably got a family, probably, you know. He's, you know, he's trying to get yeah provide for his Viking kids Yeah They specify the cons of intestinal worms more worms and whip worms in 1991 Andrew Jones a York archaeology

archaeological trust employee and palaeo Paleo-scatologist. Oh, yeah. What a specific job. You have to choose to do that I made international news with his appraisal of the item for insurance purposes, saying, this is the most exciting piece of excrement I've ever seen. In its own way, it's as irreplaceable as the crown jewels. The layers that covered... He really loves his shit. I would love to see his OnlyFans.

He is some creep. The layers that covered the coprolite were moist and peaty. The archaeologists also recovered preserved timber, textiles and leather from the site. The specimen was put on display at the Archaeological Resource Centre, an outreach and education centre run by the York Agricultural Trust. And in 2003, the coprolite broke into three pieces after being dropped while being exhibited to a party of visitors. And efforts were undertaken to reconstruct it.

It has been displayed at Yorvik Viking Centre since 2008. Brad, I'd love you to go and get a photo with it. If that... Go get a picture of the ship. Are you as excited about the ship as you were about the yak dick? I'm actually pretty excited about the shit. Now I think about it because I didn't know that was a possibility, but someone who's... Neither.

Someone, I love people who are passionate about their job and it doesn't matter what it is, but if a guy's a scatologist, it's a very nice thing, but then there'll be like a crazy reason like a crazy reasons like well actually you can find out about the history of their diet and there'll be a great reason for it. Yes. I would maybe I'd like to learn a little bit more before I judge. Well he yeah that he they found that the guy's diet consisted of mainly meat and bread even though they know that fruit nuts and other things were available he was was just like, he was exclusively eating meat and bread. God. He must've been quite well up there then.

Yeah, I guess so. He's got the meat. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's right. Yeah. How far is York from the Bill Murray comedy club on 27th? I think, well, I think it's, it'll be on your way between the Bill Murray and Edinburgh, somewhere in between there. Mate, you know what what if I got a day off if York's not that far

I'm gonna go check right you want to come on a date with me and go check out this piece of shit When is your London show I think it's July 27 27 John 27 I'm there for like a couple of days before hanging out with some mates So do you want to go on a day trip to go see these beautiful things? Let's go to York. Yeah, why not? Why not? I think this is so good.

How can it be beautiful? Yeah. I think you might be quite like moved. Like in a way. Because I don't know. Yeah, yeah. I think you might. It might be a laxative.

It is weird. It is real. It's so funny. It's real weird. Oh my god. There it is. That's so shit. It's like. If I rocked up and saw it, I'd be like, that's so funny to be like, oh my God, there it is. That's the shit, it's like a- If I rocked up and started like, that's weird.

But for some reason, knowing about it, hearing about it here, someone, two different people have told us about it. Now then saying, I'd be like, holy sh- That's it. That's it. And I haven't seen an image, but you said coprolite. Now I just feel like it's like shiny. It's like a shiny shit.

I'm like, oh yeah, I wouldn't mind seeing this. That is cool. You can, what do you, you can polish a turd. Yeah. You. I wouldn't mind seeing this. That is cool. You can. What do you can't? You can polish a turd. Yeah. You can. Yeah.

Over thousands of years. You can polish a skelly work. Yeah. Guys, if you want to bully me, you have to buy tickets to the Bill Murray comic. No. All right. Answering for the final question, what

is the synopsis of the 2006 film Peaceful Warrior? OK. An unemployed Japanese man living in the Osaka slums, Jake Huckanen has a terrible temper that he takes out on family and strangers alike. His wife Beth takes regular beatings after he's been at the pub and his kids do what they can to sidestep trouble. Niji, the eldest, is joining a street gang. Boogie has been placed in a foster home and Grace increasingly retreats to the pages of her journal.

Was there something funny about that Ray? Sorry, so it's said in Japan and his wife's called Ben. I'm sorry, that was the bit. That was the one that threw me off as well. And then it went, you don't have the Japanese and the the tourists were going to the pub. Hmm. I feel like it may have been ridden by somebody in this room. Well, I don't look at his daughter.

I mean, it makes sense that his daughter's good grace of his wife is, you know, when when movies, when Japanese films get dubbed, they'll often change the name, Angle Father. Sorry, what was his name? Jake. That's not it. I think that's the house. I think the house is realising.

No. I think the house thought, oh warrior. Okay, that sounds Japanese and then just No, no you're I I just I it's one of my favorite films and that's just the real film But anyway, I'll give you the other ones. Okay. Okay. Well, I've already locked that in Oh, sorry. I was very bad at me to be laughing through the movie synopsis, but it was just the Weirdest thing right was you started laughing? I thought when the wife Beth was taking regular beatings and that really seemed to tickle you which I thought was awful. It was the biff. It was because it was Beth. Option two Mike Pines is a middle manager at a big Boston accounting firm but he enters his 40s when he enters his 40s He realizes that this isn't the life he signed up for quitting his job and abandoning his family

He joins see peace an environmental protest ship organization Will Mike find his last purpose combating whaling ships and oil rigs or will he realize that he already had all He already had all he needed with his wife and kids at home. In this film, funded by ExxonMobil, it is unsurprisingly the latter. Option 3. Sorry, that was a pro-oil film? Pro-oil, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Anti-seapis. Option 3. An animated Russian film about a family of eagles who have run out of rocks to make their nests. The eagles try to migrate, but everyone in the new town are awful to them. Through a series of fun adventures and community engagement, the eagle family…

Community engagement! That to me already screams Jordan Barr. It's something she would have said at the zoo. Guys, community engagement. After a series of community engagements? I think I'm handing out flyers. It's Russian. If you'd let me finish. I want to hear what these engagements were. Then the Eagle family are able to win everyone over. Now they have rocks

and friends. Okay? That's option four, option five. When Dan, a young gymnast with Olympic dreams, shatters his leg riding his motorcycle, he turns to the one person who can help him get back on the pommel horse, an old gas station attendant named Socrates. Socrates proceeds to teach Dan his life philosophy,

opening his eyes to a new vision of strength and understanding, starring Nick Nolte as Socrates. Isn't that just Karate Kid? But different people? I haven't seen Karate Kid. No, there's no motorbike in Karate Kid. Oh no, there is a motorbike in Karate Kid. Actually that was option four.

Option five is young veterinarian Remy is well respected in the middle America town of Sundale. He looks after the townspeople's pets, always with warmth and care. This was until a snowstorm led to him being trapped inside his clinic. Running out of food, Remy discovers that he enjoys the taste of dog meat. When the snowstorm passes and things get back to normal, he starts to diagnose many of his patients as terminal to feed his hunger. Oh god! Or finally a retired cop who swore off the force and promised his family he'd never use guns again

has no choice but to return to violence after the murder of his wife, his daughter, his son, his dog, his cat, his neighbor and his postman. Oh my god, Ray's pissing himself. It was so funny. Despite the main character never using a gun once, Peaceful Warrior has the highest kill count of any film in 2006 as he uses crossbows, rocks and even a sharpened banana to kill. Okay, so there are all your options. Brett, you got the first crack. So the first one's the unemployed Japanese man Jake, who's

you know, pretty grim sales. Loves the pub. Traditional Japanese hangout. Did I say pub? You did say pub. Yeah it was pub, sorry. Then you've got Mike Pines in the ExxonMobil funded film. Pro Oil. Option three, the animated Russian one about the Eagles. Probably that one. No, that's definitely a Jordan Baran. I think that's that one. I would say it's the Eagles.

Jordan's drawn to it. Do you feel like there's good community engagement in that one? I think there's a lot of good community engagement. Option four is one about the young gymnast who stacks his motorcycle, but Nick Nolte. I reckon that one could be it as well, just because I feel like you've thrown one in there for me or something to like to throw them off. So that's it maybe, you know what I

mean? Like you've done one and like, oh, love that It seems like a bread answer so that will avoid it Yeah, very sneaky man, but I'm also the banana the banana is really exciting me okay I know yeah, I mean you're you're playing this game, so well. I'll just say that Brett um the the one about eating the dogs Yeah, or finally the one about higher kill count, but yeah. I just don't think you could kill someone with a banana. That's the only thing that's throwing me off. I'm gonna have to go the motorbike one

cause that sounds ridiculous. Okay. Oh. Locking you guys off cause you think I wrote that. Yeah. Just genuinely. Oh, have I done this as a double? Yeah!

And then you're like, oh, maybe we'll go with him, then I fucking fuck you all over. You sacrifice your own points for it. I'm going with, I think it's number one. I think it's Jake going to the pub and... And retranslated it. Instead of...

What's a Japanese sauna? Are you singing? I've re-translated it. Yeah. Instead of what is it? A bit of a sake bar or something. What's a Japanese sauna? And I was thinking, I don't want to say the word. Sorry. Yeah, yeah. Where's the night? You go to a traditional Japanese bath house. I feel like, yeah.

And they're like, what's the translation? Pub. Yeah, you off to the pub. I'm going with that one. I think that's great. The closest Japanese equivalent of a pub is Izikaya. Oh. Apparently.

All right, locking that in for Jordan. And that leaves just Ray early here. Oh my god. This is tough. Because I was thinking maybe the motorcycle one was just one Brett did, but then he picked it. Yeah, but that's something I'd do to fuck with you. Yes, I know. Pick my own answer. You jump on board and then I win. I know, because you're talking it up so much as well as like this is gonna be a track or

And then the other one I think you've out right right earlier I mean, he's only the mind game and then the other one that's I've tempted towards is maybe the X on mobile one Because what is it's two thousands? Oh that was pre the oil spill 2000s. Oh that was pre the oil spill But also that one just sounds I mean it could have been written by one of you guys It sounds very topical about like people in boats like protested and stuff Why the end would it say like brought to you by mmm, yeah that bit was confused I don't understand. How was a pro oil film? Yeah, I think that was like,

I think the way I read it was that, um, they were making it, you know, like they weren't publicizing it and they funded it. It's just, it is known and that's why it's an interesting film to have been submitted. Maybe. Okay. No, I'm good. Okay. No, I'm going to go with the, um, Nick Nolte. Nick Nolte is, oh, you and Brett on Nick Nolte. Wait, no, what was the gymnast pummel horse one? That with the Nick Nolte. Nick Nolte, is that you and Brett on Nick Nolte? Wait, no, what was the gymnast pummel horse one? That was the Nick Nolte. Okay, yeah, okay.

Socrates, a lot going on. All right, Ray's locked that in. Here's who wrote the answers. The one about the guy who got a taste for dog meat. That was David the question writer. And it was actually- And he's a sick man. It was actually, he-

Fucking sick fuck. He submitted a different movie and that was his fake answer for a different movie where it's made a lot more sense with the film title. But I thought it was fun for it to be a little bit out of pocket. That is what threw me. I was wondering, where's the peaceful warrior part of it?

At one point, I'd added in at one point, until they realised that the town's canine mascot Peaceful Warrior was missing. But I'm like, that's a little too much. Pull it back, mate. And eating a mascot like the costume? Yeah. He's even eating men in dog suits.

The animated Russian film that included community engagement, Brad was so sure it was Jordan, which is funny because it was Jordan. It was me! I did it! There's always one word that gives away who it is, I think. It's really hard to write these little synopses because I feel like it would be like writing a movie as well where I'm like, how do I wrap this up? Yeah, yeah.

Like, come up with the setup. Normally with a question. Normally it's, will they? Yeah. Like, confidence. On the journey, will they find redemption? Or whatever, that's the best way out of those things. That's a good one, yeah, I should do that next time.

A journey of self-discovery. Yeah. Oh, you got the voice for it too. She had everything. Until one day, Mike Pines, a middle manager at a big Boston accounting firm. I was in, That was the house. The ExxonMobil one, yeah, I don't know.

And I didn't even realise it, but I probably did have that, the boat stuff in the back of my mind. The one about the retired cop who avenged the murder of his wife, daughter, son, dog, cat, neighbour and postie and ended up killing someone with a banana. That was Ray O'Leary. Oh. Because there's one that, what's that, is it called blind or something? That guy, he lives in the house and he's like blind and he fucking kills everyone but he never uses

guns. He always uses something. I was like, then the banana. I was like, oh, that's someone trying to be funny. What's it called? Is it called like Hush or something? Yeah. Like in his house. It's quiet or something. Yeah. He's like a blind dude. And he's just a bit of shush. Yeah. It's like shush.

They renown in Australia. Bit of shush, please. Bit of shush, please. Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch. They're kind of ch-ch-ch-ch-ch. Hey, buh-buh-buh-buh-buh. Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh- Jordan went for the Japanese man going to the pub. That was Brett Blake. Oh, there was. That was, did you realise when he started

about to get out that it was weird? No, I was game playing. That was great. Do you also know what I did? I was like, I've dogged two people because it's actually a famous New Zealand film once we were warriors. And I just changed.

Oh, it's got Jacob Smith and Chris. Yeah, I thought fuck you on two levels. I just changed. Oh, it's got Jake and Beth and Grace. Yeah, I just thought fuck you on two levels. So I just changed from New Zealand to Japanese and then added an I at the end of Jake or some shit. And then like, and I just deleted all the actor's names and then I was like, fuck, he's not gonna get that and it's gonna be really embarrassing for him. That's so funny. Of course, Grace retreats, oh, it's all there.

Oh my god, grace. Technically I've changed enough. Oh, it's all there. Oh, yeah, it's all there. Technically, I've changed enough. That is such a great film, too. I'd love to see a Japanese adaption. That does mean that both Brett and Raya are correct. It is the Nick Nolte as the gas attendant Socrates playing the Mr. Miyagi role. That's so funny. I didn't connect that to you said it, but yeah it is it is like karate kid only Gymnastics yeah, right yeah, it's just a karate kid. Why does he go to mr. Miyagi's place? He's getting bullied by the those skeleton kids or whatever the fuck

He sees him doing all that karate shit in his fucking yeah, back garden He's like this guy will teach me fuck yeah. And then he just makes him clean his fence or paint his fence or some shit. So this film, critics don't like it, but the audiences do. On Rotten Tomatoes, it's got a 26% approval rating by critics, but a 76% approval rating by the audience. I love that.

An audience reviewer who loved it named La G, giving it five out of 5, writing, This movie calms my mind and it honestly changed my life. Whereas reviewer Tom Long did not enjoy it, giving it a D mark, writing, Don't go see Peaceful Warrior, don't tell your friends about it, try to forget you ever heard of the movie, clear your mind and live in the now. Alright, so the final scores! After the big triple points round.

Jeez, things shifted around a bit here. In fourth place on three points is Jordan Barr. Wow. Thank you. Came out the gate hot and lost all of my momentum. In third place on four points is The House. Sucked in. In second place on eight points, scoring a point in every round.

It's Ray Leary, but out in front on nine points is Brett Blake. Yes! The underdog, he comes through. Huge final round. Huge final round. Wow. Fucking sucked in. Started playing mind games with everybody.

Absolutely came home with a wet sail. Brett, so you are on tour. Where can people find you if they, you know, they might be listening to this in the future or whenever. Oh, just jump on my Instagram, at BrettieBlake and then it's got all the ticket links and information there. I'm doing like a tour Australia wide and then obviously London and the Edinburgh Fringe for the month.

So come hang out. Man, I love Bill Murray so far. I've never been there before. No, I've never been there before. So I was like, I'm real pumped. I think I saw some photos of you guys. You guys went and did did a couple years ago Was it I did I did a solo show there when we're over there a few years ago and had a great time

Just a really fun like a cool club pub. Yeah, like it's like I think you know, it's not huge But they're crammed in all around you. It's just like a great vibe the photos I've seen I'm like, yes I love a I love a pub. Yeah comedy The photos I've seen I'm like, yes, I love a I love a pub. Yeah comedy I was like no that sounds too fancy I want a pub and I want people to be drinking pints in the yes Yeah And I've also got a podcast called the work hates podcast with Bronn Lewis who we talked to comedians about shit jobs And I believe nearly two out of the three of you have been on hell. Yeah

Hell, yeah Guess which two you'll have to find out by going to your podcast app. Jordan, where can people find you? You can find me on Instagram at jbar-underscore-666, but also I have a podcast with Charlie and Aurelia called Pop Gays, which is a pop culture podcast. Yeah. How is Aurelia? How is Aurelia?

Aurelia's great. And Israel? Not good. They're bad. How is Raleigh? How is Raleigh? Raleigh's great. And Israel? Not good. They're bad. Depending on how Connor's edited earlier, that might really come out of the blue. And Ray, what about you? Yes, I'll be touring around Australia later this year.

And Edinburgh, and also I released a special on YouTube. Please go check it out. Oh yeah! That was filmed by Stupid Old Studios. It was filmed by Stupid Old Studios. Yeah, even just across the hallway did a fantastic job. They made it look really great. So thanks to them. But you can find it on Ray O'Leary comedy on every social media platform, Instagram,

Facebook, Truth Social. Yeah, right. Rumble. I'm on all of them. Sick. Awesome. Thanks so much for joining us everyone. Thanks so much for listening. Social yeah, right rumble Awesome thanks so much for joining us everyone Thanks so much for listening Please give us a five star review tell your friends if you think you know anyone who might enjoy it and cheers for tuning In to who knew what Matt Stewart now that you know it I'll be Matt Stewart. Goodbye

There's something about getting hungry jacks delivered that is so... Dude it's so good! And it's the worst guess... I order a Junior Whopper meal with an extra Junior Whopper because it's in the paper still so the bun's sweaty. That's what I'm hungovering like that. Yeah you need the wet bun. Wait did you say an extra... Wait what, an extra wrapper around it? Yeah, so they're more childish than a kid's poor shit. You turn into an adult.

You get too old and they go. I find the hungry Jack Zuber eats the drink always spills. I don't know about this, the weekend. Oh, the lid quality. Because they've got some weird lid situation going on. When I corrected the lid situation I know the biggest sweetie that's the only thing and I needed a dessert later so I need a McFlurry so you've done McDonald's and Hungry Jack same day and I was nearly tempted to do the triple where you're like I need to get cash yeah you, when you're that close to going. Yeah dude, it was like, you're just so close to the triple and I was pretty high.

I was like, dude, imagine having the photo in front of three bags. Oh yeah. No, you're not posting that. You fucking loser. I think that would have been a pretty powerful moment. Yeah. But what would the cuisine be?

So you get your whopper, your main from Hungry Jacks, your dessert from McDonald's, but then KFC. It's three dinners, dude. That's so easy. So if you're getting the McFlurry, you're like, well, I may as well get a quarter pounder. I'm not gonna waste this poor little guy's legs earning all these calories getting here.

Oh yeah, that's true. You gotta double down, three burgers in a day. Oh, so good. You're making me hungry actually. Dude I'm gonna I'm gonna finish it off because technically it's a 24-hour window. You can't pick it up though, that'd break the... No it's gotta be in one day. Full grub. So Brad, Jordan and Ray have played before. Oh, is this, oh. Oh, Brett, welcome.

Wow, I'm very excited. Oh, no. I'm the new guy. Oh, please be nice to me. We have to do the hazing ritual. Do you know what I mean? Can't be worse than what I did to my body yesterday. All right, I'm gonna see Hadestown tonight. Oh, I'm so jealous.

I don't know anything about it, apart the vague vague idea of what it's about I don't know much either except everybody's like it's great. Yes, I mean the movie or some shit. It's a musical about Christina knew is it soon as I was singing Musical podcast It's like there's not a spoken word in it. Oh, it's all sung. All sung through. I think that Jesus Christ...

Oh, Jesus Christ, yes. I thought you knew something about... You know how he could only sing? He sang. The Bible's all sheet music. Yes. That's why they call them hymns. Yeah. Because it's hym or something.

Capital H. Capital H-Y-M. Yes, I went to Jesus, I told you this last week actually. I went to Jesus Christ Superstar with my friends. Don't stop banging on about it. And you went to Beetlejuice the other week. Fuck it, someone's doing a ride for themselves. I was talking about having McDonald's and Hungry Jacks. You're on a pretty fucking musicals in a week.

You probably could have bought a ticket to a musical with that. Do it with that delivery fee. What do you mean it's six dollars? You're around the corner. So we'll get up and drive it. You're not gonna do that am I? Have a look at me. Putting money into the economy. Yeah, exactly. I'm stimulating the economy. Yeah, come on. Yeah, it's stimulating. On the couch. Fantastic.

So, you don't know the show at all? No. I like to come in raw and aggressive. So it's like a quiz. Bad choices of words. I am so sorry, Jordan. Jordan's left, yeah. We already talked about hazing. I think these, I mean, you're already showing you got, you're on top of the words, which

is going to be good for this. Thank you. So I'm going to ask like, there's six questions, six rounds. Yep. It's obscure trivia question. You DM me a fake answer to it. Okay. And then I read out all the fake answers as well as the real one.

And I've also got two fake ones that, so the questions have all come in from listeners. Yes. And they give me a fake answer as well as the real one and I've also got two fake ones that so the questions have all come in from listeners yes and that they give me a fake answer as well so I'll then give you all six options okay and you try and guess the real one you're trying to trick them into guessing yours okay this is one of those game shows where I get confused but just pretend like I know I understand this yeah you would not be the first I think it rarely goes a week without someone getting lost in the middle somewhere. But so I got to DM you a false answer, even though knowing the correct answer hypothetically and then trick you guys. Yes, exactly. Into believing that.

If you do know the real answer, yeah, don't give that away until after I've revealed it because you can you'll guess it and if you go I know this one and you get it right they'll know to copy you. You know what I mean? But you probably won't know. I don't. I guess I won't know any of the answers. Maybe one time I've done one of the things. Yeah, right. Ideally like they're picked. I don't I never know the answers. That's my gauge. I'm like if I don't know That proves not to be true like, you know every couple of weeks, weeks. But anyway, all right. So does that make sense? Yeah. Why do you? And a lot of them.

Yes, exactly. Don't everyone. Fuck you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it. And then, and there'll be silences at times when you're writing your answers and that'll just get edited out, obviously. Okay.

And Matt, are you still okay if my phone calls and I have to go? Oh, yes. Jordan's going to take a quick... Telehealth. I just need to get my ADHD medication. Yeah, you just keep us posted. Dude, get them to get me something as well while you're there. Hungry Jacks? take a quick telehealth. I just gave ADHD. Yeah, you just kept us posted. Get them to get me something as well.

Hungry Jacks? Yeah, yeah. Double whopper please. Medicinal. Medicinal whopper. Oh, that would actually be. No, that would that would be like Icarus. That would just be the same thing. I need another one.

All right, good to go? Yeah, whenever that happens, obviously Jordan just let us know. Oh, it's for our loudspeaker. We're already on. This is making it. This is good stuff. I think this might make it. Alright, look Brett, as someone who accidentally named their show Pedophile before going to the UK, I think it's great to take some advice.

Well, you didn't literally, for the listeners, you didn't literally call it Pedophile. No, no, but it was... Did you say Jordan Barr? Why fuck is? In brackets, I'm a pedophile. In brackets, yeah, that was a working title. It was called Jordan Barr and hello, I've just recently moved into the neighborhood. Jordan just barred up for kids. Jordan just barred up for kids.

Yeah, barred up for kids. Oh my God. I didn't even think of that. Fuck, fuck. Go back, go back. Go back. Scallywag's great though, I think that's funny. I think Scallywag was in the mix already.

It's just, it would be such a different show in Australia. Like, it would be perceived so differently. It's so funny. Culture's crazy. God, they're so different. I think... I think your telehealth's calling, mate. Oh, fuck.

Already? Already. That's good, get it out of the way. Get it out of the way. We can do your intro while you're gone. Oh my God, she just nacked herself. That's good, well, the doctor could do a concussion test. On the way through.

On the way through. And a trauma test after we just all accused of being a pedophile. Yeah. Well, I mean, possibly a good edit point anyway. Yeah. I reckon we could cut out a big chunk. It's where Brett says she's barred up for kids. He's starting out.

Yeah, that. I'll keep it in Connor. In Connor. This is good shit dude. So you are, you're gonna be, when this comes out, so this will be out in a few weeks. Yeah, so- I've looked up your site, you're gonna, this week you're gonna be in, where's Edelon Beach? Man, I'm, is it this week is it? Um, it's, I've got, well I'm going like Edelon Beach, which is just north of that, I've never been there before. Right, I've never heard of it. I've got heaps of new towns they've just added

and you're just like, I don't know where the fuck that is, but I'm excited to do it. Yeah, that's great. The UK one's stressful though, doing a month of Edinburgh. Are you doing Edinburgh this year, Ray? Yeah, I'm doing Edinburgh. Are you doing Edinburgh as well? Yes.

Oh yes, fantastic, yes, see you there. Oh my God, I need a friend over there. Will it be your first time? I've done like a two week run before, like a small compressed version, but never done the full month in a paid venue. Oh've done the free fringe. Also I mean I don't know if you've found ACOM but I know Dan Rath is looking for a place if you need to find ACOM. Oh no I've got a spare room and I'm not gonna give it to him. Oh that's right

Rebecca Austin is helping you right? Yes, yes, yes. She helped me last time as well she was great. She was genuinely really really very very helpful and ended up doing very sincere welfare chicks on me after I joked about killing myself too many times Yeah, I had that one in the with the venue with the venue staff this year, which I've still got a buying gift vouchers I forgot but the last show they're like, are you okay? I went no, but I've got two more to go you okay? I went no, but I've got two more to go. You know the Sunday, you're like, I peaked on Friday. I had too much of a good time on the Friday. Saturday was the like, oh, not great day.

And then Sunday I'm like, I just need this to end. Especially ending on Easter weekend. That was fucking weird. It was grim. Dude, so grim. Crazy. Sundays are always rough, I think. Finish it on the Saturday.

Yes, finish on the Saturday. Have the party on the Sunday still if you want to, but finish on the Saturday. Yeah. It's always the best show. I think so. Yeah. Saturdays, the Sunday show is just like, it's all the people who just couldn't be asked, rocking up and they just got their arms folded like Do it! Do it!

I guess Come on this is going to be the best one apparently Tommy Little sold out so we're here Um, nah, not going but I love it. How's the radio going? How's Aurelia going? The radio.

He said Israel. Not good. Summarise in five minutes for everyone please. Jesus Christ. The radio is great. Radio is good. I'm bad at sleeping. I still haven't figured out like the best schedule for getting up in the morning, but I'm still alive.

So it's probably it's not. Yeah, it's not mornings, it's breakfast. It's breakfast. So what's that like? I have to get up, I have to be at work at 5.30 on Saturdays and Sundays. That is awful. Yeah. No one under 30 should ever have to do that.

Nah, under 30 thank you so much. So it's 6am and you're listening to Amal and the Snifters? That feels pretty intense to be like Snifters. That's what they had to rename them for the UK. Yeah, that's it. Yeah. They didn't understand what a sniffer is. So they got confused, they had to rebrand it.

And the sniffers. Sniffers. Sniffers is a now discontinued chocolate in New Zealand. That's where I got that from. Yeah, yeah, basically. But it's fun. It's fun once you're there. It's the getting up sucks, but once you're like actually there It's chill. It seems like a fun environment

You know what I mean? Like I've done them some of them before and they like they're boring when you're there But Triple J seems fun. Yeah, it's not and they could like the audience are up for it and like you can reply to the text And sometimes that's fun. And does it mean you will that mean you're doing a slot at the hottest 100? No, I don't think so. They won't get me on. Your reaction there. I do the hottest 200, maybe that's the real countdown. Honestly, that's my preferred countdown.

That's the perfect... You know, it's not all the mainstream nonsense at that pointy end. I felt... 101 to 200 where the good stuff is. Genuinely? Yeah. You get quite a bit of sniffters in there. Yeah a lot of the sniffters. But this year I did the 150 to 100 or 101 and I was like if I do well on this maybe like yeah I'll have a shot. So I played in the reserves. Yeah and I was like I was like doing all that stuff the reserves. Yeah and I was like, I was like, panelling, doing all that stuff. It was just me and I was like,

actually I'm doing alright and then I fucked up 110 and 111. I played them the wrong way around. Oh no. You were fully, you're going, I'm killing me. I'm killing it. It was like the tail end and I was like, I was like ready, someone had already put a beer in the freezer for me. I was like, let let's go and then I fucked it up. And I'm sure the text line would have been real chill about that. You bloody idiot! There was just a lot of what's going on? What's happened? And I was like I'm relaxed. Could you just be like executive decision I've decided this song's better than the other one.

Yeah yeah. And I was like. New number one is this. Come on. Smooth by Santana. Dude that would actually rule. Santana's sick, get him on. I'm too scared to send you my answer because I'm just like does this make me look simple or smart? Oh, I like it. Just send it direct to me not to the group chat that's the only thing that'll make you look simple. Dude it's like I'm like I don't even fucking know.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I do know. You wouldn't be the first to have done that. I'm just like... When that's happened, have you just accepted that answer and then be like, well, now we have to play this way? It was lucky, yeah, no one had read it, so we got away with it. That is very funny.

Who was it? That's a good question. Who was it? But maybe that's a good strategy to put it into the group chat. Oh yeah. Fuck with everyone. Yeah.

Oh, sorry guys. Come on Jordan, are you scrolling on Instagram? Sorry, sorry, sorry, I'm waiting. The funny thing about this show is that you have to be on your phones for and the people The people who are guests on this show and you know me it's not a you're like you go Notifications so easy. She's got the Costco guys open on your phone. It's an AJM big justice doing five big boobs I do love Costco. Um, I big justice doing five big booms. I do love Costco.

I often open my phone to go to email or something and then I'll spend half an hour doing something else and then I'll be like, yeah, that's how they get you. It's like when you walk into a room and you're like, what was I coming here to get? Yeah, 100%. Was a phone call and then two hours later you're still watching dirt bike videos

going what the fuck is wrong with me? Yeah, that's exactly what I'm doing. Yeah, we're the same person. So, Brett, you've got a bit of fish knowledge. It could come in handy here. A little bit of fish knowledge. I used to work for a fishing TV show. Oh, right.

I was an underwater. Murphy's and Friends? Yeah, yeah. No, it was like Fishing WA. It was on like channel 31 in Western Australia So you can imagine the production quality It was actually pretty good for back in the day and I used to be there kind of their underwater the b-roll camera guy They're the best

Usually the highest quality Community TV shows with the biggest budgets of the fishing shows man because I had so many sponsors like it was crazy So like a boat company like be like, take our boat. Because like fishing in Western Australia is fucking everything. So, yeah, we like you get a boat, a car, and then they used to pay us great. They used to give us all the best cameras. Like we got GoPros before people had GoPros and shit like that. It's really interesting.

Scuba diving with the camera under water. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So I did that for like, I was B-roll camera. So I'd be like in the sand. I had the best job as a 19, because you're like B-roll on a camera, like, oh, you're just holding onto a full drive and the sand dune's filming someone,

or underwater. It was just getting cut away, so it was sick, yeah. That's so good. Loved it. Jordan, can I check if that chair goes up at all? Oh, yeah. Lost her. It only goes up that much.

I also, I'm a sloucher I can stay for the rest of my life. Oh no, hey no pressure. It's just this clip that's gonna get like you know 70 likes. Millions of views. Pretty important that they can see your face. Pretty important stuff. I'll stay up, I'll stay up right. I forget I got a little torso. No hey no pressure you be comfortable that's the most important thing. No it isn't. You don't think that? You want me to sit up? I do think that. You want your precious clips? As Brett called me out on before, I'm wearing trackies and thongs.

So comfort is, comfort's up there. Comfort's key. Obviously, Ray's in his full suit. Yeah, I'll be nice. He sleeps in that though. And I slept here tonight. Sorry to wake you up, mate, but thanks for joining us. I was just googling nematode to make sure I got it right before I racked my little mouth off. It's like, it's something to do with a worm or some shit.

Okay, I've done mine, now I'm just looking at emails. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I'm back, I'm back, I'm back. So addicted. Oh god, it's notification who's before what do they want I can be their friend getting you're just getting getting through some admin. What are you doing right now? Well I'm doing the admin of this show cop and pasting your answers. Oh yeah yeah that's true. I've got an admin day to day I've got so much shit to do. Yuck.

But it's like when it's done, cause it's so boring, you're like, this is the fucking best day ever. I've conquered this. That is true. I'm doing that tomorrow. I'm going to start, this is great podcast content. I'm going to start doing my tax tomorrow. Or like rounding it up, you know, like just being like,

which will be a disaster because I, every time I get to this time of year, I'm like, I didn't do any of the things that I said I would like in terms of. Do you have to do. Do you have to do receipts and stuff? Yeah, yeah. And just keeping tabs on things, especially when you're like out or like interstate or like when I went to Edinburgh last year, I started being like, oh, fuck it. Like. Yeah.

Dude, I have to do it quarterly. It's the worst thing in the world. Quarterly? No. It's a nightmare. And it's so, but it's better because you've only then got to look at three months of your bad behaviour. OK, that's true.

Or four months or whatever and you just go on like, oh fuck, fuck, did I spend all that? And then you go, ah, it's over now. I don't know. If you do the whole year, you're like, you're a real piece of shit. That's so funny. Um. I knew you work in the movies, so this probably will come easy to you. Do you work in the movies? Yeah. What's the most recent movie you worked on?

Do you work on the Robbie Williams as a chimp? No I was doing a I was doing Blacklight when that happened so I was doing the Liam Neeson one. I hadn't done a long contract in a while and it was during like a downtime with COVID and shit and I was like, I'm jumping onto a Liam Neeson film. And then we spoke about magpies for like 15 minutes. It was fucking sick. You and Liam Neeson spoke about magpies?

Yeah, yeah, I was like not, you know. Because the difference between Irish magpies and Australian magpies, they're totally different. Ah. They, yeah, I think that I didn't even know they had magpies over there, but the magpie was making a calling sound and he's like, what's that? And I was like, oh, it's a magpie.

And I started laughing and he's like, why are you laughing? He's like, because they really fuck you up. And he's like, what? And then, you know, it was that time. That's why I wanted to, because the Irish ones are like these cute little birds. When I saw one, I got mesmerized by one and posted a photo and Irish people like, it's just a magpie. They're the most common birds. When I saw one, I got mesmerized by one and posted a photo and Irish people like, it's just a magpie. They're the most common birds. I'm like, this is the most beautiful bird I've ever seen in my life.

He started viciously attacking me and it was at that time, you remember he saw that video, that viral video is like a kid on a scooter and he's like scooting away and he's like, ahhhhhh! And I showed him Liam Neeson that video and I was like, I should not be allowed near celebrities. And he laughed. So that was good. That's a sick memory. I reckon he would have loved that. I did the same thing with a duck in Australia.

Emma Holland's husband is really good at identifying birds. And I took a photo. I was like, what is this beautiful bird? Because all you talk about is the duck. It's like a common Australia duck. You're in Chinatown. You're just taking a photo of a bird hanging up. Yeah, dude. It's a crispy duck. But like a common Australian dark. You're in Chinatown, you're just taking a photo of a bird hanging out.

It's like, yeah dude, it's crispy dark. But they're like the Irish magpie, they've got that flickering of green. I'm pointing at my rib cage. Like that would- It's kind of there. I realize as I'm doing it, I'm like, I don't really have a duck-like body, but you know what I mean?

Yeah. But yeah, if I'd never seen one before, I'd be like, whoa, what's that? Hot pigeons, like every so often I'm like, that's a hot pigeon. Yeah, those moh I didn't if I'd never seen one before I'd be like well, what's that pigeons like every so often? I'm like that's a hot pigeon. Yeah, like those mohawk ones with that little they got that glittery a little messed up little That's a hot pigeon I've never I've never thought that That's just a bit for the theater of it all of course I can say oh my god, that's just a bit for the theatre of it all of course.

I can say that oh my god that's some, I'm already enjoying what you three have put together here fantastic stuff. Thank you. Sorry, someone sent me my cat video to make sure it's cool. That's a video of your own cat? Is it your cat? Yeah, yeah. Just gonna make sure it's cool.

Does your cat go crazy in the mornings? Oh I don't see him anymore. Oh true! I see him like once a month or whatever, it's brutal. It's pretty crepuscular. Yep, but crepuscular as in it's once a month. Oh yeah. They like my ex more than me.

No that checks out, that would be, yeah. Yeah, you're like, I've met you. No, no, no, I mean. Fucking hell Jordan. Yeah, she was great. What's the number again? She did this drama business for this fucking therapist. I meant that's nice, that's nice that you've done that.

Sure. I get cat updates, which is nice. That's cute. Once a week I get like a couple of videos. Oh, that's sweet, that's helpful. It's very nice of her. That is good. That's nice, it's healthy. It's healthy. Once a week I get like a couple of videos. Oh that's sweet. That's very nice of her. That is good. That's nice. It's healthy.

It's healthy. Yeah it is. But genuinely. Yeah. Do you have any pets? No. No. I don't. I live on my own and I think it would be bad for me to have a pet I think. That's true. I feel like you could have a cat. Because you don't trust yourself with it. Yeah I'd eat it also.

It just turns into bad boy bubby. You know what I mean? Cloud wrapped cat. Yeah. Oh I turns into bad boy, Bubby. You know what I mean? Cloud wrap cap, yeah. Oh, I got one, but it's not alive. Oh, there's probably, yeah, my freezer's stocked, but I don't know. Yeah, yeah. You can get some fish, get some striped fannies in there. Yeah, but I do actually genuinely love going to a pet store and going to the fish section.

I find it very relaxing. That is nice, isn't it? The sound of all the tanks for leave. Watching the fish, Yeah. Fighting fish? Yeah, but I feel like I'm... Siamese fighting fish. Mmm. They're cool. Yeah, see it's all the ones you can't keep in other tanks. Yeah. Yeah, I had one that jumped out from one tank to the other to fight the fish. What? And apparently that's pretty common. Yeah, they fight to the death. That's so sick. I used to be so obsessed with them when I like that a fighting fish is so like primary school, you know Yeah, we like yeah, that's my goal

Phil and Gary Neville with their names after two soccer players That's so good. Yeah, I think Phil won the fight That's so funny that they like in their own tank but looking over at the other one be like those guys over there like neighbors waiting to come and like jump the fence and attack you or something. I got a bunch of goldfish and I was trying to be quirky and I kept them in like old Snapple bottles,

but I think it was just animal cruelty. They all just died. I thought that it would be cute and I was like, I'll clean it out all the time. And they lasted like a couple of days. So every time you go to Catfish Comedy Club and there's that catfish in the TV, you're like, dude, get it a bigger fucking,

get it a widescreen, you're fucking giving it a four by three, brother. Exactly! It's depressing. At least one of those early 2000s TVs. Big enough to actually turn around. Yeah. That's a rule of thumb, I think that's probably. Let him turn. Love the bar. Great bar. Great bar. Great bar.

Hey, let's sing a favourite after. Great bar. Great bar. Hey, hooray!