Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 30 - Jess Perkins and Dave Warneke

Episode Date: April 3, 2023

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features returning guests, Jess Perkins (Do Go On, Simply the Jest) and Dave Warneke (Do Go On, Book Cheat)!Get tickets to see the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Watch Matt's stand up special FREE on YouTube: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!Check out Matt, Jess and Dave's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and Logo by @muzdoodles! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, it's the titular Matt Stewart here just letting you know that me and Saranja Amana are at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. We're on every night. Chinese Museum and then for the second half of the festival at the Grace Darling Hotel and we'd love to see you there. Use the discount code DOGOON and we'll see you at the shows. Also in Sydney and Brisbane, the comedy festivals in both those cities with our show Dry Dry. Would love to see you at all of those shows. Come to each one. Now on with the show. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed

during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. Welcome to Who Knew with Matt Stewart, the show where the guests write the wrong answers. I'm the titular Matt Stewart and our first guest this week is host of the Do go on podcast and performing her stand-up show almost maybe at the melbourne international comedy festival is jess perkins big fan of her work our second guest is host of the book cheat and do go on podcast and he's got a show himself coming up at the Comedy Festival called Even Hotter in Real Life. It's Dave Warnicke.

Yes. I'm loving the studio audience you brought in. Jess also has a podcast called Simply the Jest. Jeez, you two are prolific. We're busy. And it's so good to have you on the show. I really appreciate you taking the time. Thank you.

It's so nice to meet you. You were on the first episode. What's that? And now you're on the 30th episode. Wow, the big 30. The big 3-0. Everyone said this would never make it. No, we were the first to say. Yeah, we said that. You're dreaming, we said. You've said it a lot. We said, why are you aiming for 30 episodes? But you were and here you are. Congratulations. I was messaging Matt on a daily basis and then I realised I could just set up an

automation on my phone so it just triggers the same message at 6am every day. You'll never make it. Yeah. And it kind of works in both ways. Like first option is he wakes up and he's got that message and he's like, oh no. You know, like he wakes up whenever and he looks at his phone because that's what we all do first thing in the morning and he's got a message saying you're never going to make it. The other option is that it wakes him up in the middle of the night and I enjoy that as well.

Right, so 6 a.m. Because I actually send him a message at 6 or 1 a.m. every day saying, I agree. Perfect. Yeah, great. So either waking up to two messages or you're being woken up, maybe going back to sleep, you think, oh, I can drift off again and another one.

Gotcha. Just reinforcing. It is brutal. But your reception isn't quite as good. So, Jess, I get Dave's first and it confuses me every time uh all right the way the show works is i ask a relatively obscure trivia question and how contestants have to write a convincing fake answer i then read their answers as well as the real one and i have to guess which one is correct are we ready to play? Ready. Rocked and ready. Just say ready, Dave. I meant to say locked.

I'm rocked and ready. I am rock hard and ready. The first question comes from prolific question writer, Emmy White from Albuquerque in New Mexico. Honestly, Emmy, I think, has written at least 40 questions. Wow. In 30 episodes. Well, they haven't all been read out yet, but they've been submitted. And I've used quite a few of them.

A fantastic question writer. Well done, Emmy. And Emmy's question is, what did the Victorian term muffin walloper mean? I mean. We're off to a good start here. A muffin walloper. Muffin walloper. A hyphenated name.

Muffin hyphen walloper. Walloper. Hard to not go for a dirty one, isn't it? I don't know. Is that hard for you? Yeah. And while they're writing their answers, I'll explain how the scoring works.

So you get one point if your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant and another point if you correctly guessed the answer. And by the way, I'm also playing as the house. I've put in two of my own fake answers with the help of the question writers and I also get a point for each one of these that our guests choose. So each of us can score up to two points per round, which seems fair, but the probability actually favors me, the house. And the house always wins, though. If you've listened to previous episodes, you'll know that this is not necessarily the case. Anyway, our questions come from our great Patreon supporters.

And if you want to submit a question, sign up on any level via patreon.com slash do go on pod, which is linked in the show notes. The Do Go On Podcast Network, of course, is the home of this podcast, as well as Dave's Book Cheat Podcast, the Do Go On Podcast, which the three of this podcast as well as dave's book cheat podcast the do go on podcast which the three of us do if you haven't heard it before there's over 380 episodes now about all sorts of topics from the history of the world i explained that pretty well yes it's it's pretty broad we have done all sorts of topics so the answers are. Let's go back to question number one. What did the Victorian term muffin walloper mean? A kitchen utensil similar to a spatula, which earned the nickname because of its use to flatten the tops of baked goods. A street cat that would live in

the back alley behind bakeries eating the bin muffins. A muffin walloper. A boy whose role was to clean judges' wigs by banging them against a wall. A paddle that was used to smack disobedient children on the bum. Or an unmarried woman who liked to meet up with her friends for tea, cakes and a long gossip. I mean, a muffin walloper. Meeting up for tea, cakes and long gossip is the dream. Yeah. Are you kidding me?

Yeah. That sounds nice, doesn't it? That sounds so good. I want to be a muffin walloper. I would die to be a muffin walloper. I'd love to be a muffin walloper in any of these scenarios. Yeah. Eating bin muffins.

Yep. Hitting baked goods. Yes. To flatten them. Yep. Cleaning wigs. Cleaning wigs. Yeah.

I mean, that's the dream. That's why I want to get to Knoxville. The wigsphere. The wigsphere. Get us in. Do you have any thoughts here, Bob? It's tricky, isn't it? I think, what was the second last one?

Second last one. A paddle that was used to smack disobedient children on the bum. That's the one that I probably wouldn't want to be, actually. Yeah. The paddle or? The bum. Well, either, really. Okay.

I think I'm going to go for Unmarried Lady. Unmarried Lady for Jess. What about you, Dave? Oh, I also am finding this a little bit tricky. I think I'm going towards walloping on the bottom. Oh, yeah. Or the first one was? The first one, kitchen utensil used in baking.

To flatten the tops? Flatten the tops of baked goods, yeah. Let's go with that. Locking that one in for Dave. All right, let's go through. Who wrote the answers? The street cat that lived on bin muffins. That was written by Emmy, aka The House.

The House. The boy whose role was to clean judges' wigs. That was David. My dream role. Cleaning wigs. That was David. My dream role. Cleaning wigs. Yeah, but walloping them against the wall. Yeah. A paddle that was used to smack disobedient children.

That was the house. Ooh. A kitchen utensil used to flatten the tops of baked goods, which Dave went for. That was Jess Perkins. Well done. Meaning the correct answer was an unmarried woman who liked to meet up with her friends for tea cakes and a long gossip.

So, full points to Jess. Bob Perkins there. Do you think they used muffin walloper as like a derogatory thing? I think it was a little bit pejorative maybe. Because that's the dream. And I am an unmarried woman. Have you walloped a few muffins in your day? I was just messaging my friend to like like, catch up and go shopping,

and I was going to say we could just get some cake while we're there, but she is married. Well, no, I think you'd still be a muffin walloper. Right, yes, but she could still have the tea and the cake and the long gossip, but she could not be a muffin walloper. She'd still be a respectable citizen. Yeah. Okay, great.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so funny. All right. So two points to Jess, no points to Dave or the house. I just want to quickly issue an apology because I did actually flip Dave off when you revealed it was mine and I feel bad about that. It was poor sportsmanship. It's all right.

Honestly, I think it's worth docking a point. No, I don't. But I have apologised. I have apologised. All right. I'm going to dock a point. No, I don't. But I have apologised. I have apologised. All right. I'm going to dock a point. No. But I'm going to give her back for the apology.

Yes. Okay. Fuck you, Dave. And if I took the apology graciously, will I be getting a? You'll get a point. But because Jess told you to fuck you, then you lose that point. Right. But she said me to fuck off as well.

Okay. So, I'm going to give you a half point, but take that away because of the way you're looking at me right now. So we're back to two to Jess and nil to Dave. And the house is on minus one. Is that why? No, no. House is on none.

Sorry, I'm just not quite following you. We're up to question number two. Why do you invite us back on? We're so disrespectful and feral because we pod together every week well i don't know if you're listening to this show most guests are also very disrespectful i'm a big fan of this show i love it what's it called who are you uh so question number two comes from dean cooley from harrod in ohio god's country and dean's question is which of these is a real animal named after a fictional character and one of its features that That might be slightly confusing. So, basically, you've got to

come up with an animal name that's been named after a fictional character because it shares a trait with that fictional character. Okay. So, your answer might be, for instance, the Scooby-Doo parrot because- It says Raggy. It's a parrot that says Raggy it yeah okay so that's the real one that's that's too much okay um so it's and it's named after a fictional character yes so it'll be the something something because something and said, did you specify, it's just a fictional character. It's not like a cartoon. Any fictional character and any animal.

Got it. And while you're writing your answers, here's some more information on the word muffin walloper. According to Word Genius, I think this is just fantastically written. I love it when Jess is already feeling tickled by her own answer. Word Genius writes, you probably know at least one muffin walloper, if you're not one yourself. A muffin walloper is an unmarried woman who gathers with friends to gossip. In the Victorian era, these conversations often happened over tea and cakes,

hence the muffin part of the phrase. It literally refers to someone who hits the cakes hard. Nowadays, muffin wallopers might meet over brunch or drinks at the end of the week. Thanks so much for putting it in terms that we modern folk can understand. We're genius. I don't want to catch up for drinks at the end of the week. I want to catch up for tea and cakes and long gossip. All right, the answers are in. So, here's question number two.

Which of these is a real animal named after a fictional character and one of its features? The Walter Whitefish because it creates a substance that the out-of-the-sea creatures get higher. The Wolverine Frog because it has retractable bone claws it uses to defend itself. Fuck, I hope that's real. But also that's terrifying. Yeah. The Captain Jack Sparrow Sparrow, named because on a good day it looks a little bit like Johnny Depp.

On a good day. Superman Beetle, because of its extreme sensitivity to kryptonite. Or the Daddy Warbucks Duck. It has an uncanny knack for being able to smell wet dog bit of fun so you got the walter whitefish the wolverine frog the jack sparrow sparrow the superman beetle or the daddy warbucks duck dave i went first last time so you can go okay okay let's get this straight. You want an answer from me.

Walter Whitefish. They are discovering stuff all the time, but that feels like a more recent character from the last 15 years. The other ones are maybe a bit, I suppose, Jack Sparrow is maybe similar-ish. Superman's been around forever. Daddy Warbucks. That's very funny.

That is funny. And Wolverine, I want it to be true. So, the frog, it has- Retractable bone claws it uses to defend itself. That sounds- Jess is nodding at me, but are you trying to put me off here? I think it's that or- Yeah, I'm going to go for it. I want it to be real.

Please lock in frog for me. I want frog as well. Lock in the frog. That's not your answer. No, I just think it's a really good answer from me. All right. Let's go through who wrote the answers. The Daddy Warbucks Duck.

That was written by the house. The Superman Beetle. That was written by Jess Perkins. Kryptonite's not real. The Krypton is. Oh. The Captain Jack Sparrow Sparrow was written by Dave Warnke. Yes.

The Walter Whitefish was written by The House, meaning the Wolverine frog is correct. Well done. The House is still on zero. The House is still on zero. Technically minus one. Minus one, but it refuses to acknowledge. Well, there you go.

Like I said, fascinated but terrified. Has that frog launched a lawsuit against Marvel? I think so, yes. As it should. Yeah, Stan Lee, have you had an original idea in your whole life? Come on, Stan Lee. All right. The next question was written by Zoe from Epping, New South Wales,

in brackets, the better Epping. Cop that, Victoria's Epping. Oh, no. But Epping's here has got such a great reputation. And Zoe's question is, why is Douglas Merritt remembered in scientific circles? Why is Douglas Merritt remembered in scientific circles? Douglas Merritt.

Douglas Merritt. And while you're writing your answers, I'll let the listeners know a little bit more about the Wolverine frog. According to National Geographic, in the X-Men comics, the superhero Wolverine is armed with three sharp claws on each arm. They extend through the skin of his hand and the resulting wounds are closed up by a superhuman ability to heal. wounds are closed up by a superhuman ability to heal. Now, in a bizarre case of life imitating art, scientists from Harvard University have discovered that a group of African frogs use similar weapons. The frogs defend themselves with sharp bone claws on their hind feet, but to do so, the animals have to drive the claws through their own skin. It's an extreme defense that is completely unique in the animal world. The answers are in.

So here's question number three. Why is Douglas Merritt remembered in scientific circles? He pioneered genetic engineering and farming and famously was able to grow an unusually large cob of corn. How big? How big? And squashed his ass. My wife was in there. Sharon!

I told her to get out. I said, ages it's going really slowly now i'm just having a lie in she loves a lie she loved oh sharon this one's this episode is going to be dedicated to sharon uh he is the first and so far only person to have his nobel prize rescinded after it was discovered he had faked his experiments. He discovered penicillin. A popular myth is that it was discovered by Marie Curie, but it was Douglas. I've heard that.

I've heard that somewhere. In a famously unethical experiment, the nine-month-old Douglas was conditioned to fear a fluffy white rat In a famously unethical experiment, the nine-month-old Douglas was conditioned to fear a fluffy white rat or he accidentally looked into the wrong end of a telescope, inadvertently inventing the microscope. Everything looks so small. Hang on a second. So genetic engineer, large copper coin,

had his Nobel Prize rescinded because he faked his experiments. He discovered penicillin, even though that dog, Marie Curie, takes all the credit. Unethical experiment where, as a nine-month-old, he was conditioned to fear a fluffy white rat, or he inadvertently invented the microscope. Oh, my gosh. Back to you, Bob. That's a tough one. I think it could definitely be penicillin. Yeah, if you didn't see your opponent somewhere, that'd be fair.

So, if we're going to go through the ones that could be, penicillin's the top of the list. That's obviously the top of the list. What else have you got on the list? I think you'd be an idiot not to choose that one. Yep. But because you're leading, you're probably going to pick a different one. I'll pick something different just for like because otherwise Dave and I and i just gonna always be chickens the same one i appreciate that

you know so i'll leave that one for dave and so i'll choose the second most likely yep there's a few good ones i want to say nobel prize because i hope that's true i don't think it is but i want to believe well you don't think it is because you know the penicillin yeah so over you dave you don't want to believe in a giant cup of corn because it's quite a man's house i just i have too much respect for sharon sharon yeah i personally love it when uh sharon's life is on the line on this question i know if this is real we've killed a woman yeah and here we are laughing but i do love a story when the house gets crushed so i'm gonna lock in big corn you don't want to go for penicillin you don't want an absolute slam dunk of points i want i want i'm for the house is so far behind

on minus one if i give a pity point to the house by saying the corn one yeah okay great even though i know mercury obviously is a lying inventor of penicillin that's right all right let's go through who wrote the answers inventing the microscope by accidentally looking in the wrong end of a telescope. That was the house. Oh, that was pretty good. He discovered penicillin. This might be a typo, but I've got written down here that was written by Jess. Huh.

Oh. That doesn't make any sense. That's weird. That will make no sense to people who don't listen to Do Go On. Who do we say that actually invented penicillin? Mara Curie. Oh. Because Dave did an episode.

Did you do the episode of Mara Curie? Yeah, we talked about that. And I was like, I know, she invented penicillin and that was not the case. Right. That's me being an idiot and standing by it. Who did invent? Alexander Fleming. Not Douglas.

I'm so confused right now. Then we had he grew an unusually large cup of corn. That was Zoe, aka The House. I love that corn. That was great. I love the wording Zoe used there, unusually large cup of corn. Yeah, that's what got me in. Then we had he's the first and only person so far to have his Nobel Prize.

Racinda, that was Dave Warnicke. That was me. Damn, well done. So, I'll point there for Dave, meaning the correct answer was, in a famously unethical experiment, the nine-month-old Douglas was conditioned to fear a fluffy white rat. Oh, I had a feeling that was sort of the other one I was thinking, but that's so sad.

Yeah. That is awful. Yeah, the story doesn't get any happier. The house is on the board. Dave also scores another point, meaning after three rounds, the scores are the house on one point, Dave on two points, but still out in front, it's Jess on three points. Great work, Jess.

Did the house get a double point in there? Sure. Just want everyone to know how fixed this game is. The house is coming last. Yeah, but you're catching up because you got two points when you got one. So, question number four comes from Tyler Edwards from Canton, Georgia in the United States, I think.

It's Canton, GA. I've leapt to a conclusion there. Okay. Like I'm a bad scientist conditioning a baby. It's pronounced gar. Canton gar. Canton gar. Tyler from gar writes,

for what odd reason was Atlanta Braves baseballer Eric Abar a last minute omission from the team on May the 19th, 2016? Atlanta's in Georgia, so I think it makes some sense that that would be Georgia. Atlanta Gar. So, last minute omission. Yes. While you're writing those answers, here's a little more information about Douglas Merritt, who for a long time was most, and probably still is most famously known as Little Albert. That was kind of his code name in the report that was written. According to the American Psychological Association, one of psychology's greatest mysteries appears to have been solved.

Little Albert, the baby behind John Watson's famous 1920 emotional conditioning experiment at Johns Hopkins University has been identified as Douglas Merritt, the son of a wet nurse named Arvilla Merritt, who received $1 for her baby's participation. In the study, Watson and graduate student Rosalie Rayner exposed the nine-month-old tot, whom they dubbed Albert B., to a white rat and other furry objects which the baby enjoyed playing with. Later, as Albert played with the white rat, Watson would objects which the baby enjoyed playing with. Later, as Albert played with the white rat, Watson would make a loud sound behind the baby's head. After a number of conditioning trials, Watson and Rayna reintroduced the animals and furry items without the scary noise. Through the conditioning, the animals and objects that were once a source of joy and curiosity had become a trigger of fear. Watson never deconditioned the child and was dismissed from the university around the same time because of an affair he was having with the graduate

student Rainer. Apparently, everything about the experiment was dodgy. Yeah. Like, they didn't have any real standards for what fear was and stuff. It was sort of just like, yeah, he looks scared now. I'm writing down he looks scared. But they just stuffed up this kid's psyche and then just left him. That sucks. But the family did get paid a dollar. That's right then. His suffering was worth it. Can I ask a quick question?

Sure. What sport was it again? Baseball. Okay, I thought so. And while you're still writing your answers, let's go for a quick break. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. All right, the answers are in. So, here is question number four.

For what odd reason was Atlanta Braves baseballer Eric Abar a last-minute omission from the team on May the 19th, 2016? When blood started coming from his mouth, he was rushed to hospital and found to have a chicken bone stuck in his throat. Oh, boy. Whoa. He was stuck in a well and couldn't make it to the game. It's very similar to how that chicken bone would have felt, I guess. He pulled a muscle in his back after an especially aggressive sneeze. He got so swept up in Pokemon Go that he lost all track of time

and didn't show up to the game. Or he realized he'd thrown out a hard drive with $8 million of Bitcoin on it and spent the rest of the day at a dump looking for it. So he got chicken bone in the throat, trapped down a well, pulled out his back from sneezing, stuck in a Pokemon Go game, or lost his Bitcoin and had to find it at the dump. And what year was this? 2016.

Okay. Dave, you're first. I mean, the chicken bone in the throat of someone with a tight and tiny esophagus, that really freaks me out. I really hate thinking about that. Yeah, it's no good. I think people do, yes, sneeze in the shower or whatever and fall their back, fall their neck.

I've done that. And you are an elite athlete as well. I am. Thank you. I feel like 2016, that's sort of pokemon go and bitcoin time so when both those things are going i think these are all on the table bananas and what was the fifth one i haven't said uh stuck down a well stuck which was big back then yeah that was it's a big big remember there was that thing yeah people just started falling down wells

yeah yeah it was a big fad real crazy people were going welling and they didn't know the dangers of it. You can fall down them. Yep. You got to be careful when you're welling. Yeah. Planking on a well. Across the top. Yeah.

I think I'm going to go, as much as it disturbs me, the chicken bone in the throat, please. Chicken bone in the throat for Dave. That is upsetting. I'm going to go Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin for butt. Because it's less upsetting.

Yeah. And it's 8 million. You's eight million you'd be you'd bloody you'd miss a day of work you'd miss a day of work you'd call in sick and then whatever yeah and i imagine eight million of bitcoin in 2016 would now be worth eight billion actually i have no idea if is it going up since i don't know anyway it went up it went down it went up it went down again all right let's go through who wrote the answers. He got so swept up in Pokemon Go. That was the house.

He pulled a muscle in his back after an aggressive sneeze. That was Tyler, a.k.a. the house. He got stuck in a well. That was Jess Perkins. I think I've had those answers before. Why did they not make it to the thing I've said that before? I think it was a baseballer as well. It's not my go-to.

He was stuck in a well. So when you hadn't written it, did you think, well, if I didn't write it. Maybe it's true. He threw out a hard drive with Bitcoin on it. That was Dave Warnke. Well done, Dave. Meaning Dave was also correct. Blood started coming out of his mouth.

He had a chicken bone stuck in his throat. So two points to Dave that round. That doesn't feel good to win that. I didn't want of his mouth. He had a chicken bone stuck in his throat. So two points to Dave that round. That doesn't feel good to win that. I didn't want to be right. That's awful. But you did win,

so be grateful. Thank you so much. Thank you. Eric Abar choked so that you could score. Can we have a score check? We're going to have a quick score check now.

After four rounds, we have the house on one point, Jess on three points, but a new leader on four points. It's Dave Warnocki. Wow. It's a seesawing affair. Three rounds to go. Here's question number five. This one comes from Steven and Jessica Gruber from Kent, Washington in the United States. And the question is, what is the nickname of gambler and outlaw Michael O'Rourke? What is the nickname of gambler and outlaw Michael O'Rourke? This is from the old West, late 1800s.

While you're writing your answers, here's some more info about Eric Abar's injury. According to ESPN, the Atlanta Braves shortstop was removed from the starting lineup for the game against the Pittsburgh Pirates after a chicken bone got stuck in his throat. Manager Brian Snetka said Abar arrived at PNC Park on Thursday afternoon in discomfort and was taken to a doctor, sedated and had the bone removed. So he survived, Dave. That honestly is a nightmare

of mine. Huge relief. So thank you. Alright, the answers are in. Here is question number five. What is the nickname of gambler and outlaw Michael O'Rourke? The Grand Old Juco Rourke? Rattlesnake Dickie? Johnny Behind the Deuce? The Stone Cold Cactus? Or Mickey Rourke?

Interesting, interesting, interesting. Can we have those again? The Grand Old Juco Rourke? Rattlesnake Dickie? Interesting, interesting, interesting. Can we have those again? The Grand Old Juco Rourke, Rattlesnake Dickie, Johnny Behind the Deuce, The Stone Cold Cactus, or Mickey Rourke. This is good. So does that mean the actor Mickey Rourke, I guess, was... Named in homage. Yeah, named after the... So it's Outlaw and Gambler.

Outlaw and Gambler. Outlaw and Gambler. Professional Gambler and Outlaw. I think that was his full-time occupation. That's great. Part-time Outlaw, part-time Gambler. Put them together. You got one full-time? Man.

How am I going first? Yes. I'm thinking it through here, but let me do that out loud for you. Hey, why don't you take us through the board? I'll take you through the board. Sure, I'd love to. Our opening gambit there is the grand old Duke O'Rourke, which is fantastic.

I love that so much. Then we moved into... Rattlesnake Dickie. Which I also love. Yeah, that's good. Then you've got Johnny Behind the Deuce. I don't understand that one. I love it because I don't get it.

Then the Stone Cold Cactus. Yeah, a name you could set your watch to. And finally, Mickey Rourke. It's the great name for an Academy Award nominated man. Possibly winning. Nominated under the category man, we have Mickey Rourke, Dick Van Dyke. He'd be nominated for best man. I think, oh, I don't know.

I either want old Duke or. Grand old Duke. Grand old Duke or not the Johnny one. Stone Cold Cactus. Stone Cold Cactus is the other one i like i'm gonna go stone cold cactus stone cold cactus for jess what about you dave i kind of like rattlesnake dicky i mean i think it's funny it's not i'm gonna go with rattlesnake dicky you gotta go with your gut and my gut is telling dicky dicky all right lucky that is for Dave. Well, let's go through

who wrote the answers. The grand old Juco Rourke. That was the house. That's great stuff. I love it. He had 10,000 men. Mickey Rourke was Jess, which I didn't get for quite a while. What do you mean? I just thought that, I thought her joke was that she just shortened Michael to Mickey. I didn't even notice the lack of the O. I'm like, oh. And then I'm like, oh, she took the O off as well.

That's funny. Oh, that's the actor's name. Yeah. There's layers. There's layers to my comedy. Come see my show. The Onion. Is that what your show's called?

My show's called The Onion. That's what your website's called. Yes. And my show is called The Onion. Is that what your show's called? My show's called The Onion. That's what your website's called. Yes, and my show is called The Onion, and it's me dressed as Shrek for 50 minutes. That sounds great. Yeah. It's pretty good stuff. The makeup takes forever, but it's pretty funny.

Yeah. So, come along. The Stone Cold Cactus, which Jess went for. That was Dave. Oh, you son of a bitch. Rattlesnake Dickie, which Dave went for. That was Steven and Jessica. Okay, The House. I love of a bitch rattlesnake dicky which dave went for that was steven and jessica okay the house i love it rattlesnake dicky meaning the real nickname is johnny behind the deuce what does it mean it doesn't make any sense johnny behind the deuce

so the deuce like that's the deuce the card the number two yeah none of it makes any and apparently he would always bluff on the two card or something. Oh, because it's the lowest card in a handbook. Yeah. Like a pair of deuces. But it's such a clunky nickname, Johnny Behind the Deuce. I hate it. In a recent episode with Cam James and Kirstie Wiebeck,

we were talking about a good nickname you want to be able to take to the bedroom. And if you want to be able to take it to the bedroom, you've got to be able to get it out of your mouth pretty quick oh yeah it can't be so clunky oh johnny behind the deuce doesn't work doesn't work cobra that does work absolutely it does i still won't call it mickey rourke i reckon you could get away with that yep uh but not johnny behind the deuce no that's stupid so that means we've got one point to dave and one point to the house in that round meaning the scores are now the house in that round,

meaning the scores are now the house on two points, Jess on three points, but increasing his lead on five points. It's Dave Warnke. Wow. Thank you so much. Two rounds to go. Jess is a little bit behind the deuce. She's in position deuce.

Now, question number six comes from Francis Redman from Tasmania. The question is, what strange occurrence happened on the Cape Cod Peninsula in Massachusetts on the 11th of June 2021? Oh, a recent one. This is very recent. Very recent. Quirky new story. I realized I say Massachusetts funny and I've been listening to the Bee Gees a lot lately and they have a song called Massachusetts. And I think it's kind of where I get it from. In Massachusetts. Yes.

They say it like that. I love that song. Maybe that's where I get it from. It's just a fun word to say. I love it. Could you reread the question? What strange occurrence happened on the Cape Cod Peninsula in Massachusetts on the 11th of June, 2021? Cape Cod, that's a song as well, isn't it? Never knew where that was. And while you're writing those answers, let me tell you a little bit more about Michael O'Rourke.

According to Stephen and Jessica, Michael Mike O'Rourke, aka Johnny O'Rourke, or Johnny Behind the Deuce, was a professional gambler of the Old West. The character of Tommy Behind the Deuce O'Rourke from the film White Earp is based on him and was played by an actor named john doe uh i love how they've changed his name from johnny behind the do so rock to tommy behind the do so

rock just in case of legal issues i suppose but apparently his story it's wrapped up in the white erp mythology which apparently a lot of that isn't all that true but johnny behind the deuce killed a man in the Old West and the Earp brothers maybe protected him or something, or at least that's the myth. I got a bit confused reading about it, but I'd heard the name Wyatt Earp because it was made into a film with Kevin Costner, I think. All right, the answers are in. Here is question number six.

What strange occurrence happened on the Cape Cod Peninsula in Massachusetts on the 11th of June 2021? The first annual office chair derby was held with people racing chairs down the fourth steepest hill in contiguous USA. Two people were hospitalized. A heartbroken divorcee threw his wedding ring into the sea only for a crab to bring it back to him. Crab to bring it back to him. The town was struck with a string of hauntings that lasted for three weeks. A humpback whale accidentally swallowed a diver and the diver survived. Or authorities were baffled when a lifeboat washed ashore, filled only with boxes of Steven Seagal's album,

Songs from the Crystal Cave. Is that real, do you think? Is that a real album? Yeah, probably. So you had the first annual office chair derby, the heartbroken divorcee throwing his wedding ring, the town being struck by a string of hauntings, humpback whale swallowing and spitting up a diver,

or a lifeboat being found filled with Steven Seagal's album? I'm going to say something that sounds pretty stupid, but two of these sound vaguely familiar. Ooh. And it's the humpback whale one and the crab one. Okay. And they're ridiculous. Yeah.

But they're ringing a bell somewhere. Okay. I want it to be the crab. I want it to be the crab. I want it to be the crab so badly. I think it could be the crab or the whale, but I want it to be the crab. Fuck it. I want it to be the crab. I want it to be the crab so much.

So you're going to go with the crab? Yeah. Going with the crab for Bob? So, you're going to go with the crab? Yeah. Going with the crab for Bob? I think the whale thing, that rings a bell for me too. Yeah. But, like, you know, maybe I vaguely remember.

I think I'm going to go with the humpback whale. Humpback whale for Dave. All right. Well, let's go through who wrote the answers. The first annual office chair derby being held where two people were hospitalised. That was written by Dave Warnke. That is me. I was looking around the room and i saw that we are sitting on roller chairs where you went for the jess perkins method yes i was really struggling for a second i got confused

and i was thinking it was still the question about the old west i'm like i don't think office chairs were around back there dave oh oh i see uh then we had The authorities Finding a lifeboat Filled with Steven Seagal's Album songs From the Crystal Cave That was the house The town being

Struck with a string Of hauntings That lasted for Three weeks That was Jess Perkins So in your mind Was that date The end of the

Hauntings or the start That was just The beginning That means one of you Is correct Oh my god I want it to be Jess Jess you were right It was That was just the beginning. That means one of you is correct. Oh, my God. I want it to be Jess. Jess, you were right.

It was either the whale or the crab. I want it to be the crab too because that's so funny. I think it could be the whale. The heartbroken divorcee throwing his wedding ring into the sea only for a crab to bring it back to him. That was written by the house. I was just thinking like how would they report on that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The humpback whale accidentally swallowing a diver and then

the diver surviving. That is the correct answer. So one point for the house, one point for Dave Warnicke there. I take my hat off to you for believing in the crab that I asked. I wanted it to be the crab. And a great fake answer too. I was, yeah when I was. But also in the writing of it like why would they call him a heartbroken

devil say? But I do vaguely remember a story of somebody, like, yeah, finding that people find their wedding rings in weird places. Like, somebody lost their wedding ring and then found it on a carrot in their garden. Yes. Stuff like that. All right.

Well, that brings us to the final round. And as you know, this round is worth triple points. Oh, my God. Have I still got a chance? So, it is still truly anyone's game. With the scores being Jess and the house on three points, but Dave out in front on six points. We always finish with a movie synopsis question.

This one comes from Michael Dio from Vancouver in Canada. Michael's question is, what is the synopsis of the 2011 TV movie Snowmageddon? What is the synopsis of the 2011 TV movie Snowmageddon? And while your answers are being written, here's some more information about that whale incident. According to all that's interesting, Michael Packard was the diver, and he had set off early in the morning on Friday, June 11,

to dive for lobsters with his fishing partner, Josiah Mayo. After a disappointing first haul, Packard dove under the water to try again just before 8am. But as he scoured the sandy bottom of Herring Beach Cove, something suddenly struck him from behind. All of a sudden I felt this huge shove and the next thing I knew it was completely black, he later recalled. Everything went dark. I was like, oh my god, did I just get bitten by a shark? Then I felt around and realised there were no teeth and I hadn't really felt any great pain. And then I realized, oh my God, I'm in a whale's mouth. I'm in a whale's mouth and he's trying to swallow me.

For a terrifying stretch of 30 to 40 seconds, Packard struggled in the darkness. Questions raced through his head. He still had his breathing apparatus on. Would he be stuck in the whale's mouth until he ran out of air? What would happen to his wife and teenage children? I thought to myself, okay, this is it, I'm going to die. And I thought about my kids and my wife. There was no getting

out of there, Packard said, recalling that he could feel the whale squeezing the muscles of its mouth. But then the whale started to shake its head. Packard felt himself zoom towards the surface. And like that, he was free. His fishing partner saw him shoot out into the air. He went flying up into the air, apparently. and he then jumped back aboard Mayo's boat and Mayo helped pull Packard out of the water. I was inside it. I was inside its mouth, he gasped when he was on board. It tried to eat me. Although Mayo worried that his fishing partner had suffered broken bones, Packard miraculously survived with few injuries. That's in part because whales aren't generally

aggressive towards humans. The whale who swallowed Packard likely did so by accident while trying to feed. They do what we call gulp feeding, and they can open their mouths up incredibly widely, explained Peter Corcoran, a senior scientist at the New England Aquarium. According to Duke Robbins, the director of humpback whale studies at the Center for Coastal Studies in Provincetown, when a humpback whale opens its mouth to eat, its mouth expands like a parachute. When they do that, they don't necessarily see everything, he said. Thus, a whale can swallow something by mistake.

But experts say that what happened to Packard is extremely rare. It's a very unusual accident, said Corcoran. It was just unlucky enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. As for Packard, he's not hanging up his diving gear anytime soon. In addition to his encounter with the whale, Packard has survived a plane crash, confrontations with great white sharks and almost getting lost at sea. My God. He's obviously, he's not easily spooked. Okay, the answers are in for our final question. Question number seven. What is the synopsis of the 2011 TV movie Snowmageddon? Bill Snow is an FBI agent who has gone rogue and is threatening to unleash the winter doomsday bomb that will bring humanity trembling to its knees. Little does he know that his identical twin brother, Joe Snow, is back from his Antarctic expedition and has brought back with him the only thing that will melt Bill

Snow's cold heart and save humanity. In Omaha, Nebraska, school is cancelled for a snow day. 16-year-old Chad Brondell and his friends are elated until the snowmen they build come to life. These things have a thirst for blood and carrots. A group of scientists on a research trip to the Arctic find themselves in a strange place. Realising this place isn't on any maps, they have found themselves where no humans have been before, and there's a whole lot of snow coming their way. Ooh. An Alaskan town is in danger of destruction by a mystical snow globe

that appears on a family's doorstep, wrapped like a Christmas gift. When they unwrap it, they slowly realise the amazing-looking natural disasters that are occurring in the globe are also happening in the real world, with deadly effect. Ooh. Christmas gift. When they unwrap it, they slowly realize the amazing looking natural disasters that are occurring in the globe are also happening in the real world with deadly effect. Well, finally, it's Christmas Eve. An American child named Emily is sad to find out the Australians don't get to enjoy a white Christmas. So as she is tucked up in bed, she makes a wish. As she is drifting off to sleep, her wish starts coming true and she has no idea the terror she has unleashed. Because all of a sudden, it snows. It snows a lot. All around the

world. Way too much snow. Even in Australia. Especially in Australia, where the native animals are struggling to deal with the weather. Koalas are shivering. Snakes are frozen solid. Penguins are doing okay. Only Santa Claus and his right-hand elf Lars can dig Australia out of this cold mess, injecting a large bomb-like device into the heart of the ice storm to explode it before Snowmageddon wipes out all life in the land down under. Wow. A lot to unpack, isn't there?

Wow. Yes. So you've got Bill Snow and his brother Joe Snow. Bill Snow. The one I started to Snow and his brother Joe Snow. Bill Snow. The one I started to write was Dr. Edward Snow. Then the second one was The Snowmen Come to Laugh. Third one was Group of Scientists Ending Up in a Place That's Not on Any Maps.

Then we had The Snow Globe That Is Affecting Real Life Natural Disasters. Then we had the snow globe that is affecting real-life natural disasters. And finally, Christmas Eve, Australia getting a white Christmas. This is a tough one. I love them all equally. Yes, I'd green light all of these. Absolutely.

It's a yes from me. Okay. On all of them. I don't think it's the last one. Snow Down Under. I don't think that's it. I think it might be I'm tossing it between Snow Globe and Snowmen Coming to Life. Me too.

Well, get your own opinion then. My only thing for a lot of them is, and maybe honestly it applies to all of them, you said TV, movie, they all sound like big budget productions. Yeah, it's true. Do they? But like in terms of effects and setting. I don't even think it's funny to imagine it with a small budget. Yeah, I'm imagining pretty shit snowmen coming to life

and having a taste for blood and carrots. The one about people being in a place no humans have been before, that could just be all done on sound stages. Right, because I was thinking, wow, that'd be expensive. And then Snow Globe, the disasters, the snow down under. Snowmen coming to life, that's a lot of computer effects. I'm like... Yeah, koalas shivering.

What's the cheapest one to make? gonna say snow globe snow globe for bop locking that in what do you reckon dave i was also very keen on snow globe but is that boring it's up to you i mean it it um i think it makes most sense to lock in the one you think is right okay it's a good way to play the game i think but i reckon that just sounds like a TV movie. And like you're saying, they love a disaster, but low-budget disaster. Your Sharknado is that kind of thing. I'm imagining that.

And your villain in this is a snow globe. So that's pretty low budget. You can get one of those pretty cheap. Yeah, especially in Alaska. Just go to any tourist shop, I guess. All right, let's go with snow globe. And hopefully it's not the house, otherwise we are fucked. Why are you laughing like that?

Oh, no reason. Sorry, I had something in my throat. Are you all right? Just trying to get a chicken bone in there. God, that's upsetting. That is upsetting. I hate that. Can't get it out.

All right, let's go through who wrote the answers. Bill Snow and Joe Snow, the FBI agent. That was written by Michael, aka The House. That's good. And his identical twin. The one Jess nearly went for about Chad Brondell and his friends. Yep. Creating the snowmen.

That was Dave Warnke. Oh, well done. It was the snowmen. Absolutely. Good stuff. Love Chad Brondell. Yeah. Fantastic man. It was all Love Chad Brondell. Yeah. Fantastic man.

It was all around Chad Brondell. What a guy. Christmas in Australia. That was a collab between Michael and me. Nice. As I'm reading it, I'm like, I've made this go for a week. This keeps going and going. That was four movies, but I loved it.

Then we had a group of scientists on a research trip to the Arctic, finding themselves in a strange place. That was Jess Perkins. I thought that was very believable. I would have probably picked that one, I think. I wanted to die writing that. You suffer for your art. That's right.

And that means the correct answer is an Alaskan town is in danger of destruction because of a mystical snow globe. We did it. The good news is we killed the house with a giant cup of corn. Crush that house. Right. Okay. I can tell you that the film did not do super well.

Got a 23% audience approval rating from Rotten Tomatoes. Out of? Out of the full 100%, I'm afraid. Oh, gosh. Yeah, that's not good. But I love the idea of this guy, Sheldon Wilson. Having not seen any of his films, I think he might be an auteur. Oh, for sure.

Like Robert Vince. I think he's got a bit of the Robert Vinces about him, another Canadian auteur, because he's also made films, directed films, including Once Upon a Crime, Shark Killer, and Mega Cyclone. It's a mega cyclone. We need to zhuzh this up a little bit. That's funny.

It's so good. All right, final score check. The House is in third place on three points. And I want to quickly remind the audience, come see me in Melbourne with my show Ding, 6.30 throughout the whole festival at the Chinese Museum. In second place on six points is Jess Perkins. Jess, where can people find you? They can find me, well, festival at the chinese museum in second place on six points it's jess perkins jess where can people find you they can find me well specifically at the comedy festival

at uh tick swanston uh from the 14th of april my show is called almost maybe so good and this means that out in front winning the day on nine points it's dave warnicky thank you so much what a pleasure and you're already halfway through your run Dave and it's been going really well I've been killing it crushing it

there's probably one ticket left if you're buying one or two left if you need two etc repeat all the way up until 700 tickets

and yeah hope to see you there for the last week I'm doing my show Even Hotter in real life at 6.35pm at Campari House

I would disagree with Dave because I mean mean, you're very photogenic. Yeah, I actually probably look better in the photos. But don't tell anyone that. Come along, be using the eye of the beholder. No refunds. Come down. Love to see you there. Please come.

And we're also doing a show, the three of us together, at the Melbourne Town Hall for tonight on the day of release and next week on Monday the 10th. Is that right? Or maybe... And the one after. Is that right? Or maybe... And the one after. We're about to... We're opening tonight.

Opening tonight. 9.30pm at the Melbourne Town Hall, April 3, 10 and 17. It's the Do Go On quiz show. Jeez, I don't know what I was doing last week. I took part in some sort of a live panel quiz show. Thanks so much for joining us, everybody. And please do go see all of our shows and follow everyone on their social

medias as well this show who knew with matt stewart is also going to be on the 9th of april at 2 p.m in melbourne uh at the old european beer cafe it's also going to be on at the brisbane comedy festival on may the 14th in the evening you can grab tickets for that now via matt stewart comedy.com cheers everyone for tuning in to Who Knew With Matt Stewart And now that you know it I've been Matt Stewart Goodbye I like it Okay

That's enough for me My answer is Is in And I'm rocked My answer is in And I'm Jess Can I be rocked For this episode?

No. Because any time you try to give yourself a nickname, we simply refuse to jump on board. All right, fine. Don't call me rocked. Nice try. Damn it. Dave.

Oh, I hate that name. I mean, I love it. Good, because that's your birth name given to you by your parents who love you. It's not quite true. Sometimes it does surprise people to know that my name is David legally. I've had people go, is your full name David? Huh? I didn't know.

What? Yeah, blows it. Honestly. Those people are fucking dumb. I don't know how to say that any other way. Those are stupid people. Yeah. Matt's staying very silent over there

who's naming a baby dave anyway good question i want to hit the cakes hard because i think as i've grown and i've like matured and i you know i'm an adult now i'm like, we shouldn't gossip. It's not nice. But fuck, it's fun. Sometimes you just want to gossip. People are like, oh, no, you don't know what they're going through. I know. But let me have a little goss.

Got any goss up at the moment? Not that I'm willing to share in front of a microphone. It's about Dave. My ears are pricked up? He's had some work done. You're not supposed to tell people about that. He's puffed out the beard a bit. Injections.

If you know what I mean. I've had a beard transplant from my friend Matt Stewart. It's not the right colour, but it looks good. You can't gossip about yourself. Go away. I'm gossiping with Matt. Okay, sorry. Have you heard the gossip about Jess, Matt?

I don't know. What happened? She's had a beard transplant. She shaved it. Yeah, I'm sure. My little secret beard. I think at the end of the episode, I'm just going to have a super cut of Jess laughing at her own writing.

I'm having fun. To me, that's the main thing. I just want Jess to have a good time. You just want Jess to have a good time and the house to win. You fucking dog. It's going to be hard to win for minus one. I love it when Dave gets cocky. It's so funny.

I'm having fun. Just a bit of fun. Good game is a good game, Dave. You just want me to write a letter over here, are you? Rewriting your vows or something, are you? Okay, mate. Oh, dear. Sorry.

I'm in a bit of a silly mood. I only just saw what you've changed. So stupid. Shut up. It's so good. So good. So fucking stupid. I just can't.

My brain's not working very well. I love it. Never mind. Jeez, this one, the table have turned. Dave, smash this one out. I know, this one, I stopped and started. I started to write one. No, I like it.

Take your time. I don't think I want to. I want it to be over. Not the episode. Having a delightful time. This answer, I want it to be over.