Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 93 - Charlie Clausen and Ben Russell

Episode Date: June 24, 2024

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features Charlie Clausen (Everyone Relax, TOFOP, Two Guys One Cup) and Ben Russell (The Emu War, Something Good)!Check out Matt's stand up special FREE on YouTube: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and Logo by @muzdoodles! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, it's year 2024 and I'm here to tell you that we're doing a live 100th episode, August the 3rd at Comedy Republic in Melbourne. It's going to be so much fun. Tickets are going quick, so grab them now. Welcome to Who Knew with Matt Stewart, the show where the guests write the wrong answers. I'm the titular Matt Stewart. Our first guest is award winning comedian Ben Russell. Welcome, Ben.

Thank you so much, Matt. Can I just say it's a pleasure to be this is my first time on the podcast. That's not true. You've been on many times. And I just want to say how honoured I am to be a part of this cultural phenomenon. It's probably about the sixth time you've been on, I reckon. Yeah. Well, thank you for the first time. Okay. This is the first time you've been on the show.

Feels like the first time. OK. This is the first time you've been on. It does. Our second guest this week is an actor. Oh, what? Our second guest this week is an actor who's appeared. Why do you sound surprised by that? On every Australian TV show. Shortlist includes McCloud's Daughters, Blue Heelers, Neighbours, Canel Road.

Canel Road. Canel. Yes, Canel Road. Famous Canels of Amsterdam. Satisfactory to Home and Away and Wolf Creek is Charlie Cawson. Hello. Canel Road. What is it? Canal.

Honestly, can I just... And I... This will sound like it's a joke, but it's a genuine question. OK. What is wrong with you? I don't know. That word does trip me up all the time. And I thought I'd put it in because I think listeners of various podcasts, I do know that I have trouble with that word. And I thought it was a chance to prove that I can do it.

You couldn't. And I should have written it phonetically. Kane. No, that's the wrong way. Did you hear Kane Cords pronounce the anals of history this week? No. It would't chords pronounce on the angels of history. Go down in the angels of history. That's good. Okay. Yeah.

All right. The way the show works is ask relatively obscure trivia question and our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer. I then read their answers well as a real one and I have to guess which one is correct. The first question comes from listener Alex Lloyd from Addis Cum in the UK. Alex Lloyd. The singer, songwriter. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I assume, yeah. I assume it is. It's amazing. And he's from- You're amazing. And what happened to- it went to King's Cum? He's- yeah, he ended up in Addis Cum. Addis Cum.

In the UK. Yeah, right. Hmm. And he did spell that phonetically for me, so I would have said Adizcomb. But Alex has helped me out there. Adizcomb. And Alex from Adizcum's question is, what does- Wait, sorry. Yes. Are you saying At His Cum? Adizcum. Adizcum.

Yeah, like, you know, football is life. Like if the Incredible Hulk was describing about a commercial that made him ejaculate, you might say, at his cum. At his cum. Yeah. Why would you name a place like that? Yeah, I don't know. It's not at his cone. It looks like at his cone, but he has spelt it out phonetically for me.

C-U-M? Did he spell it out cum? Yeah, C-U-M-M. Dirty. Do you ever think that he's having a bit of a laugh? Do you think Alex Lloyd has become a prankster? Yeah, well he was so earnest. He's not making music anymore. True.

Isn't he? I don't- actually, I don't know. He might be. He probably still- you never stop, do you? No, I mean, you're an artist for life. I'll look into that while you're writing the first answer to the question. I have not asked it yet, I don't think- Adders come.

Adders come. Alex from Adders Comes question is, what does woggle hopping mean? What does woggle hopping mean? He released an album in 2016. Oh no, he released a single in 2022. So I think he is, he's still going. While they're writing their answers I'll explain how the scoring works. So you get one point if your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant and another point if you correctly guess the answer. And by the way I'm also playing as the house. I've put in two of my own fake answers for each question with the help of the question writers and I get a point for each one of those that our guests choose. So each of us can score up to two points per round which seems

fair but the probability actually favors me, the house apparently. And yeah the house won last week for the first time in ages so I feel really good about this. After even things up the guests get triple points in the final round and the house does not. Anyway, our questions come from our great Patreon supporters. If you want to submit a question, sign up on any level via patreon.com slash do go on pod, which is linked in the show notes. I've finished and that's OK. I'd like to just take this time just to ask Matt just some questions. Yeah, I was going to ask you some questions, but I'd love to hear what your question is.

Okay, Matt. Okay. What would you do if I were to all of a sudden take down my trousers and my underwear, show you my ass, and then spread my butt cheeks and a little man comes out of my asshole and tells you the exact date, time and method of your death. What would you do? What would I do? There's a lot to take in.

Like, can I ask? I think it's just like a standard. I ask, is he a fully sized, full sized man? Oh, no, he's a tiny little man. How does he exit? He like, because it's your sphincter, he does it realistically. It's not like a magical thing. He doesn't walk, he doesn't open up and he walks out.

No, no, no, he pulls himself out. All right. It's Jim Carrey in Ascensura 2, sort of thing. Yeah, yeah. Or Borat in not the Borat film. Yeah, the film where he's not Borat. Yeah, it's Ascensura, it's Borat. Yeah, yeah, It's the vibe.

And so, is he- how does he deliver this news? Is it kind of menacing? No, he whispers it. You have to lean in close. As a matter of fact. And does he live- does he live in you always? I assume so, yeah, yeah. And how did you know to let him out in that moment?

I go into a fugue state. Wow. Yeah, yeah. Like how did you know to let him out in that moment? I go into a fugue state. Wow. Yeah, yeah. So I- Like, quatto in total recall. Exactly. So I kind of like, I just sort of go limp and like I'm dead, but I'm still sitting. And then I just start moving.

And then after the event, I come to it and I go, I have no memory of what has happened. Okay. And what if we showed you a video of it? Like if we filmed it. I'd be like, oh, yeah. Yeah, that's happened. That's happened before. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Sorry about that. Yeah, right. I'd be embarrassed, frankly. Has he ever got it wrong? Has the little man ever predicted wrong? No. Oh, okay.

Do you know, so in this scenario, can you tell me what the date and time is? No, because I'm not a little man that lives in my arsehole. Well, that, yeah. But you also- Oh, honestly. I know, that lives in my arsehole. Well, that could also- Grow up, honestly. That's a good point. But I mean, that would affect how I'd react. Yeah. If it was tomorrow at midday, I'd be like, oh shit.

But if it was like, oh, when you're 94, I'd be like, oh, fantastic. Yeah. Had somewhere in between, then that would like vary. Charlie, what are your thoughts on this? Oh, I just- I just wonder about this guy. Like, I mean, is it hygienic where he lives? Like, is he- how does he cope with- I think that's where he wants to live.

Right. So, whether it's hygienic or not is- It's his choice. Yeah, it's his choice. Like, who are we to judge? Is he wearing clothes? No. He's naked.

A tiny little naked man. Yeah, it lives in my arse. And he is a man, like he is the- He's not an elf or anything like that. No, no, he looks- he's very humanoid, human-esque. There's no pointy ears or glowing eyes or sharp fangs. Which is good for you if he's living inside your anus. If anything, he's completely hairless.

Oh, wow, that makes sense because it's probably- Yeah, you don't want to get- Irritation for you. Yeah, exactly. And him, get-...a irritation for you. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And him, he'd have dags on everybody. Everybody. Is that what you call them?

Huh? Is that what you call them? Like when a sheep has like- Dags. Dags. Yeah, I just- They'd have full body dags if they were hair full. It's just the way you say it, I think.

Yeah, dags. All right, the answer in for question number one, what does woggle hopping mean? It's an act of tying up several boats together to form a flotilla. Then boat crawling around the flotilla, drinking and partying. Oh, that's option one. Then you got a competition where you put rabbits down your trousers and jump up and down. I don't know what the competition element is, but sounds like fun. You compete with yourself.

Yeah, yeah. That's like golf. You know, you're competing against yourself in the course. A dance performed at traditional Celtic weddings. A big annual get together of workers in the water, oil and gas industries at the House of Pancakes. Or leaping over things that are approximately neck height. So you got the pub crawl on the water, the boat crawling flotilla, the rabbit standing

trousers competition. Seems still on the nose that one, because it's hopping in there. Yeah. Yeah. Is that yours? No. Celtic wedding dance, the get together of the water, oil and gas industries at House of Pancakes, or leaping over things that are approximately head height, neck height. I guess neck height is approximately head height.

Depends on how long your neck is. Yeah, that's a good point. I'm pretty long neck. Who do you think has the longest neck? Like, who's the longest neck celebrity? Oh, I can G in with Poucher. You reckon? I'm thinking my mind immediately drifted to like a mini driver. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

But her head's big. I think it's easy to see a long neck with a small head. Really? Don't you reckon? Joe Danaher looks like he's got a small head. Yeah, he's got a long neck. And so his neck looks long. Yeah. Who's that guy that was in?. And so his neck looks long. Yeah. Who's that guy that was in- he was the preacher in There Will Be Blood? Paul Danno.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's long neck Danno. Yeah. Yeah. Don't trust that fucker. Great actor, though, but that's why you don't trust him. Well, he's the Riddler too. Yeah. But that's- that's not real. What? Yeah, that's not a docco.

What? He's an actor. Hang on. Wait a minute. Yeah, Batman's not real. What? Yeah, that's not a doco. What? He's an actor. Hang on. Wait a minute. Yeah, Batman's not a documentary. Shit. I thought the Batman was a doco. No, no, no, Gotham doesn't exist. What? Yeah, it's not a real city. It's fictional.

But how did it- So why were they filming there? It's called a movie. So what people do is they write these stories. I know he's been ridiculous. Right. Is this another story? Like, is a little guy losing your ass and people write stories and film them with cameras? Come on. No, but say for that instance, that's a hypothetical.

That's fictional. A real man doesn't live in my asshole. It was merely just me asking him a question, sort of gauge what sort of person he is. And I'm not impressed. L. Fanning's coming up. That is a long neck. That's a long neck. Could you Google long neck celebs? I did.

And this is a top, this page is called top five actors with amazing necks. Top five longest necks! That's a fetish page. For sure. But did you say Paltrow? I said Paltrow. She made the five. Anytime you kind of like single out one body part, you know that there is going to be just

a huge fetish following on the internet for it. Yes. Doesn't matter what it is. Yeah. What do you think? Is there any part of the body that hasn't been fetishised? It's probably a strange- No.

Like, everything- I think everything's up for grabs. Knee crook? The crook of your knee? Like the inside of it? I guess it does, like, because you can fold that up. Yeah, absolutely. It does have it, it's very seductive.

Yeah, I mean, if I can make mine look like a vagina. Chin? What about a chin? I reckon there's chin heads out there. Chin heads. That's why, I mean, that's why you gotta cover them up. Oh, yeah. Because you're out on the streets. You can cover up most of your body, but people out there would need chin.

I reckon... Getting flying with fire. Flying themselves at you. I reckon Matt's a chinhead, because it's always the ones that cover it up and, like, protest it that are really into it. Yeah, but Beard's just a chin closet, really. Yeah, a closet for the chin. So we're off to the first question.

Do you want to have a guess, Eben? I would love to have a guess. And my guess is going to be Celtic dancing because Woggle is the type- it's the type of dumb fucking name that Celtic things have. Hmm. No offence to my Celts out there. Matt Stewart.

Yeah, I mean- I mean, in terms of naming shit, Celts aren't great at this. No, that's true. Haggis. Yeah. Haggis. Apparently Stuart is from Stuywarden, which I haven't really looked into what that means, but I assume pigstars. It's all like-

Oh, yeah, of course. Someone who guards a stye. Stuywarden. If it's in English, it sounds dumb. And if it's in, like, Gaelic, whether it's, you know, or Scottish, it's like, Fleek Fleek, a Fleek Fleek Fleek. Oh, there's Irish Scots. Oh, fuck off.

Both of them, they're Celt, they're both Celts, right? Yeah, I think so. Well, I know someone Gaelic and one's Celtic, I think. What's the difference? Well, I only know this because my wife is Scottish. And so I think it's... Oh, no, no, it's both Gaelic. I don't know.

I think they came from Ireland, I think a lot of the... Can you Google it? So Scottish... Yeah, the difference between Celt and Gaelic. So I think Irish speak Gaelic and Scottish don't speak Gaelic, they speak Scottish. Right. They... as well as English. Yeah.

So Gaelic is the language, but Celt is the, I believe, the people maybe. Right. So one refers to a culture, the other refers to a language? I think so. But I'm willing to be wrong on this, because ultimately, when you take everything into sort of account, I don't give a shit. Okay. Okay.

This is from dictionary.com. Gaelic refers to one of the Celtic languages and cultures, specifically from ancient Ireland. Ben wins. And this competition. And to the languages developed from it, such as modern Irish, Scottish Gaelic and Manx. Manx. Manx. Manx.

Manx. Manx is a Gaelic language of the insular Celtic branch of the Celtic language family, itself a branch of the Indo-European language family. I mean, you did ask the question. Manx. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, you've gone with the Celtic dance. Yep.

Okay. Dance. Yep. OK. OK, so let's... The flotilla. The rabbits in the pants, the Celtic dance. Oh, you sound a rhyme, that felt good. I'm just spitting. Freestyle. And what is the other one is there's a really weird one about the International House of Pancakes. Yeah, water, oil and gas industries. That sounds like a protest clue.

Did you write that one? No. Sounds like someone trying to fuck with this. The thing is, is that sometimes the stest, soundest one is the right one. Yeah, that's the point. It's a really stupid game. Yeah. What was the last one? Leaping over things that are approximately neck height.

And what's the word? I've forgotten already. Woggle hopping. Woggle hopping. I'm going to say... I'm going to say it's the flotilla. Yeah. I think like bar hopping, woggle hopping. I don't know.

I'm just- You've got no logic on it. I've no logic. That does happen. What? I don't know what it's called, but I remember, especially on like in the US, on the Great Lakes, they have those like flotillas. Tie the birds and the bugs together.

Yeah, like in the summer. I know that exists. I don't know the name, though. Yeah. All right. Here's the right answers. A competition where you put rabbit standing trousers and jump up and down. That was Alex, OK, the house.

Yeah, too much. How much if I could give you some feedback on that one. Yeah, he said Nick Jeanopoulos puts rabbit in his pants and jumps up and down. I'd be like, why too much? Yeah, yeah, I would have like, that's way too much, Nick. Yeah, yeah. I would have. That was a hit show though. Big annual get together of workers in the water, oil and gas industries at the House of

Pancakes. That was also the house. Woggle, right? And hopping. House of Pancakes. Yeah. No, we get it. Oh, shit. I only just got it. Okay, well, Charlie gets it there. I didn't get it. I googled, what does WOG stand for? And yeah, it was, had to get through a fair bit of a racist stuff.

I can't believe you just said that word. Unnecessary information for the game, really. Okay, we'll edit that out, Connor, then please. No, no, no, leave it in. I do have an Italian friend and he did say I could say that word. Oh, you got the OK. Yeah, but it's very hard to communicate that, you know. You need it written down on a card. I do. I need a card that's laminated.

Said Mark Bananos. Says that you could say. The W. I'm not allowed to say it, but I am allowed to scream it in public places. Who gave you that? Yeah. Everyone. Oh, yeah.

The little man in my eyes. I am one quarter Swiss Italian, so I can't actually say it. Fuck. Yeah, I gave myself that permission. I, yeah, I've eaten it Fratelli Fresh. Okay, yeah, right. I also feel untaddled too. I had a potato, cheese and onion pasty.

Okay. Yeah, I think that, how recently? Because I think that wears off after a few days. I recently saw a film starring Chris Pine who's the only voice of Mario. Chris Pine? Yeah. The voice of Mario. No, Chris Pine's...

The other Chris. The other Chris. Chris Pratt. Chris Pratt. No, but I saw a film with Chris Pine. You got your Pines in your prats. Who gets confused with Chris Pratt. Okay.

Who played the voice of Mario, which gives me a green card. Green card. What's the red card for Mario. I think yeah Using is confusing. Okay very confusing this chat The idea of boat crawling with the float Tiller Charlie went for that was Ben Russell It was so obscure I was like it has to be that I quite liked how after you'd locked it in he was still Selling it. That was fun. I didn't want you to think that I was you know support like trying to guide you in there Well, how the turns will table? Yes because the dance performance traditional Celtic weddings Ben went for that. That was Charlie The correct answer is probably the dullest one in there and leaping over things that are approximately neck high

The correct answer is probably the dullest one in there, and leaping over things that are approximately neck-high. Oh, God. Because I was wondering if either of you did scouts, because apparently a woggle is a neck tie in scouts. Right. Which is about neck-high, I guess. I did cubs for about two weeks, but I was so severely bullied by the older cubs that I never went back. Bladed cubs. Yeah. The same.

Yeah. So I did like two or three weeks cubs and they bullied me because I had an American accent. But isn't that where Cubs are from? You're different, don't you understand? You're different. We don't like that. Yeah, and I was so confused. I remember this the first time I was like, why they don't like me? I remember this.

Because the way I sat. What the fuck? I remember this kid, I didn't even know him. He said, you've got sisters, don't you? And I'm like, yeah. And he's like, they're dumb bitches. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh my God. You've got sisters, don't you?" And I'm like, yeah, and he's like, They're dumb bitches. Oh, man, what? Jesus Christ. Oh my God.

You've got sisters, don't you? Yeah. What the fuck? He was crazy, that kid. That's the... He's getting into the middle of the game early. I didn't even get the chance to stay in the Cubs long enough to be molested. It was terrible. Yeah, I was going to say, in hindsight, they did both of us a favor.

That's in favor, yeah. I'm pretty sure scouts are from... Yeah, because the scouts at this point are just like bush choir boys. Yeah. Which is the choir of boys of the bush. That's funny. Bush altar boys. That's fucked up.

Assaulta boys. All right, question number two comes from Jackie Gillan from Geelong. Home of the infamous Corio oil refinery Eternal Flame apparently. Thanks for that extra info Jackie. And Jackie's question is, which of these is a real species of bird? So you've just got to come up with a made up species of bird. Okay. And...

Is it like the Latin kind of name? No, just the common name. Like a blue tit? Yeah. Purple robber or something like that. Yeah, yeah, No, just the common name like a blue tip. Yeah. Some robber or something. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I mean, don't burn all these ones. No, no, no. Some good stuff. While you're writing your answers, here's some more info on Woggle Hopping.

According to the website, Trad Folk, Woggle Hopping is the practice of leaping over something that is roughly the height of your woggle. A woggle, for those wondering, is a fastened, developed, er, is a fastener developed in the 1920s for closing and holding together the ends of a neckerchief traditionally worn by the scouts. The object in question can be anything you like, providing it offers the requisite height necessary to increase your heart rate while leaping it. George Corner, believed to be the originator of woggle hopping, claimed to have woggle hopped a car and a landmine. Well, here's the claim.

They're not backing it up. But they do this article questions the validity of woggle hopping a landmine because most of them aren't neck height. They're in the ground. They're in the ground. Yeah. So you just, you hopped it. You didn't wogble hop it though.

And landmines, like even if it was above ground, they don't tend to be neck height. They're like flat little discs. Yeah, flat little discs. That's right. Unless it was like, you know, the ocean ones, the big ones. Oh, yeah. But it's hard to leave things on the ocean. For you, maybe.

Not for you. Not for me, mate. That's how I make my bread and butter. You're a pro. Name one you? Not for me, mate. That's how I make my bread and butter. Name one thing in the ocean. Uh, uh. Coral. I leapt it.

Oh, OK. Real easy. Hard for you, easy for me. Yeah, you're right. It is hard. It would be hard. I'm humble. There you go.

You know what I mean? I'm one of the most humble. Just don't judge a book by its cover. I know I look like I can't jump anything in the ocean, but what about a whale? Easy. Which one? All of them? Blue? Same time. Stack them on top of each other like Fonzie. You're like the evil Knievel of whale hoppin. You're like the David Blaine of whale hoppin. One part Aquaman, three parts evil Knievel.

Blaine of whalehopping. One part Aquaman, three parts evil Knievel. All right, the answer for question number two. Which of these are real species of bird? Triple breasted lady of the night. Horrie headed grebe. A grebe. A grebe. Silver crested knobby malute. Whitman's tit.

Or the gyrating floozy. Okay. There's a lot that just sound like slanderous sexist phrases. Yes, that's right. Triple breasted lady of the night. So hang on, we pick the one that's real. You pick the one that's real. The birding scene is notoriously misogynistic.

Yeah. Is it? Yeah. Yeah, those spotters. They have no respect for anyone. Andrew Tate. Bird spotters. It's your crackhead, Charlie. Okay. All right. So we've got the triple breasted lady of the night. Horry headed grebe. Silver crested knobby maloot. That sounds- Whitman's tit. The gyrating floozy. I mean, it's either Whitman's tit or silver crested knobby maloot. That sounds- Whitman's tit. The gyrating floozy.

I mean, it's either Whitman's tit or silver crested galoot? Maloot? Nobby, nobby- Nobby maloot. No, see I'm nobby maloot, Whitman's tit or the floozy, because I know- Isn't a floozy a bird? Ah, I so didn't know that. Because it came from somewhere, right?

Like, usually these terms, like these old special things like Flusi. Who you running around with? Yeah. That Flusi. That comes from something. Usually like animals, because people were bored and- I didn't know that. That complicates things.

I thought tit. And this isn't me selling- Flusi's not mine. Okay, sure. But then that's something that if it was yours, you'd be doing to me. But I could be double bluffing you. Yeah, totally. Yeah, that didn't help. In fact, that literally got in your head more, which is also kind of good for me.

Yeah. So I'm playing dirty. You didn't tell me I was playing with Hannibal Lecter. The last time you were on Charlie, you did some, you were into the game plan as well. So far you've gone easy on him, I think, but is that part of your strategy? Maybe that is part of my strategy. I mean, I say you've gone easy on him, it's one from one. Yeah, it's one from one.

Lul. I'm going to say, sorry, what was the tit one? Whitman's tit. I'm going to stick with Whitman's tit. Whitman's tit. All right. What do you think, Ben? Named after Chris Whitman, who played 50 odd games at Hawthorne and the New to the Saints for a season. Yeah, we got the-

We were a big club for letting players retire with us for a bit. A couple more seasons. Ben's got his thinking face on. Well, now I've got to break the pattern, you know, we've got to and by pattern I mean one, but. Don't let me influence your decision at all. Well, see, that's what I'm thinking about. If I can externalise my thought process of bringing you guys in. So when I brought up Floozy, you know, you hadn't considered it.

No. And to me, the Floozy is a good one and you are an actor. And are you not considering it because it's yours? And he stumbled upon something. And then what was the other one that you said yes to? Silver crested knobby Maloot. See, that could be also you just throwing you going, oh, I'm thinking about this, but what this one looks good.

So, that's to bring you inside. That's the two wolves that are inside me. Right. One of these is you. You got two wolves and a small headless man. Could I be going like 5D chess and I picked Whitman's tit to try and throw you, even though that was like my suggestion. You can't pick your own suggestion.

You can't pick your own suggestion. You can't pick your own, but... Okay, well forget that then. Yeah. Stumped. I'm at a real quandary. You might have to ask the man in your bum. He'll just tell me when I'm going to die.

That's probably not helpful. He's a real... That's not going to add to the helpful. He's a real- That's not- That's going to add to the situation. He's a real vibe killer. But if he tells you you're going to die as soon as you finish recording this podcast, then we just have to keep recording the podcast and then you won't die. That's true. It becomes like speed in new versions.

Yeah, that's right. Okay. I had the- What was the first one? Triple Breasted Lady of the Night. I've seen a stroke. Triple Breasted Lady of the Night, second one. Horrie Headed Grieb. Oh, that's good.

Horrie Headed Grieb, yeah. Silver Crusted Nobby Maloot, Whitman's Tit, the Gyro Rating Fluzy. Gyro Rating Fluzy. Gyro Rating Fluzy is looking in for Ben. It's interesting. If any one of them are right, like the floozy or the whore, is there a whore in there? Did I hear that? The whorey face? Yeah, whorey headed grebe.

Whorey headed grebe. Like it does give great credence to your assertion that derogatory comments towards women originated in nature. Yeah. Which means they're healthy because everything that comes from nature is healthy That's what I understand if it's nature's goodness comes from nature can't be bad for you Triple breasted lady the night that was That was Jackie, OK, the house. That felt, I mean, I loved, I love it, but I felt a bit too much.

Yeah, yeah. It was two great answers in there. It's like a hat and a hat. You don't need a triple breasted lady of the night. One triple breasted, blah, blah, blah. Silver crested knobby balut. That was Charlie. You were planting it. I was. You got me.

You read me like a book. Oh! Fuck that was pure luck. I've got to... That was a roll of the dice. Clearly I've got to tell. I've got to get rid of it. I was 50-50 on that. And also Charlie went for Whitman's tip which was Ben's. Ah! He sucked me in. The jar-writing floozy though Ben. That was the house and I don't think floozy's are real birds. Meaning the correct answer was... Horrie-headed grebe. Well, well, well, I would... Horrie-headed grebe was good.

Horrie-headed grebe is like the person who wins Big Brother that you didn't notice for the entire season. It's like, oh what? Oh yeah, of course they're gonna win. Reggie? Yeah. Question number three comes from Amy Clark from Winterport in Maine. And the question is- That's not a real place. Winterport, Maine. Okay.

I'm from Winterport, Maine. What's the Maine accent? I don't know. It's a New England. Yeah. Like, that's all that sort of New England. It's way up north, east. Yeah. I think it's pretty like chill. A chill. Winter park.

Standard-y American accent on the side. So, Amy Clark from Winterport Mains question is, what was the headline of the Orlando Weekly on December 22, 2021? So, you just need a headline. What happened? 2020. Orlando Weekly. December 20, 22. No, December 20. What? December 21 in the year 2022- 22nd of December 2021.

22nd December 2021. OK, so. What had happened? Yeah, COVID. Is that- First year, we're one year into COVID. Yeah. Almost. OK. And we're in where? Orlando. Orlando, yeah in where? Orlando. Orlando, yeah.

Orlando, Florida. So, yeah. So a lot of weird shit happens in Florida. That's right. It could be a Florida man. Crocodile bites man's penis and has sex with porn star. Yeah. It could be a-

Bath salts. It's yeah, Florida man does this. Florida man dot dot dot. Yeah. Um. But 2021. What's going on December? It's it's- So and they didn't lock down during COVID, did they?

Like DeSantis kicked Dodo. I don't think Florida did a lot of- DeSantis would never shut it down. No. All right, so- I think they actually jailed people for wearing masks. Really? I don't know.

I mean. Did you see that like DeSantis has passed some ban on like rainbow pride flags? Your only colours, colour flags you can buy is red, white and blue. It's so fucking ridiculous. Just like these. These colours are gay, these ones aren't. And it's important that, you know, we live in the land of the free. You can do anything you want apart from buy rainbow flags.

What? Well, you're right. Your answer. I'll let the audience know a bit more about these hoary headed grebes. Apparently they're found throughout Australia as well as in New Zealand and are considered to be of ancient origin, according to Jackie. The hoary headed grebes are good swimmers and divers. They dive underwater for their food like small fish tadpoles, crustaceans, and will also dive to escape from danger rather than flying. A pair of

Hori heads will construct a nest in water that is essentially a floating platform of weeds, grasses and twigs. Their eggs lie in dampness in the nest and the eggs are concealed under pieces of wet vegetation when the incubating parent leaves so that the nest appears empty. Under full sun the covered eggs are warm and moist, often left unattended for some time. The hoary-headed grebe obtains its name from the white streaking of its head during breeding time. It is also known as the hoary headed dab chick and also Tom pudding, which is so good.

What are we doing? I can't, this is, oh yeah. Answers are in. Yes, I took too long to give you my- Answers are in for question number three out of seven. What was the headline of the Orlando weekly on December 22? 2021 Florida woman avoids alligator attack by defending herself with stiletto shoes

Man hunt ends after high-speed chase through Disneyland car park Government head attempts to break bread with biker gang undead to improve cred only leading to bloodshed Florida man claims bags of cocaine and meth wrapped around penis aren't his or Disney get out okay they got oh Disney get out it's probably the most likely one Florida woman avoids alligator attack manhand hunt ends in high high speed chase through Disneyland carpark. Government head attempts to break bread with Bucky Gang undead. That Florida man with coke around his penis aren't his, he claims, or Disney get out. The rhyme really tickles me.

Yeah, I don't know what kind of publication is the Orlando, whatever it is, Observer. Orlando Weekly. Weekly. Is it like a trashy tabloid that might rhyme a headline? Like the Northern Territory? Yeah, I think, well, I think it is. Daily News? I think that's all newspapers in America. Right. It's Dr. Zustine. I think they're all-

They're all like that now, right? I think it's your call, Ben. I sometimes- Just think through them all. I'm not. Sometimes I'd like to, like, let my heart guide me. And the only way to be truly unpredictable is to just not do what's predicted. OK, slow down there, Kev. Explain that one more time. Do something crazy.

And I'm feeling a little crazy. OK, and I'm going to go the rhyming. Oh, shit. Yeah. Welcome to Infobem. What are you feeling? I'm feeling crazy. I'm feeling the opposite.

That's like me walking in and putting the down on like two or whatever. The house wins. Oh. Is that Tim Robertson sketch? Have you seen that one? Oh yeah, yeah. It's like a damn Martin. Lady Lucas.

Oh God! I'm gonna need that snake back. See my thought pattern has gone the opposite way. I'm like, I need to claw back some fucking need to study the game the most obvious one is the the lady defender stuff from Croc with stiletto but I'm like is that too. That sounds like a chat GBT give me a Florida headline right you know what I meant to generic it's almost too perfect. The penis. Penis is good too. Yeah, I know, but it just it's a bit, I feel like that's it's too funny. So like a listener or a comedian might come up with.

And you've got to say, I don't know if an American publication would say penis. Why? So how and also like how much cocaine and meth could you get around a penis? Well, I guess that depends on the man. But yeah, but I mean, like, I imagine if I was going to traffic drugs, I want to take a large enough quantity to make it worth my while because, you know, you're taking a big risk. And so you think at least a brick and I don't care how well endowed you are. Like, that's a heavy amount of drugs to be carrying around. It's hard to wrap a brick around anything. Penis. Yeah.

And not why wouldn't you just put it up your butt with Ben's little man? Yeah. You'd pick it, put it up your butt, strap it to yourself. I mean, that is a fucking great thing that you have. You've got a little guy in your bum. Hmm. Imagine if he- Let him wheeze his beak a little, so it's like, hey, you hold onto this while I go through security. He's got a little man up his bum.

What? It's a Russian doll of bum men. And like, how safe would it be if your little man or his little man was shelving like mule in the drugs? You're never going to find that. OK. I mean, it's not going to be a great amount. Say we're at a discotheque. Yeah.

And we want to take some pills, some- I'm talking ecstasy. Yeah. I'm talking- Tablets of ecstasy. Human traffic. I'm talking- Go. Ibiza. Human human traffic. I'm talking about how to go. Yeah, OK, we're going to work.

It's let's do it. Yeah. I give a pill to the little man who gives the pill to the little man inside him, who then puts it up his ass and shelves it. Does that increase the high? How does it get into your bloodstream? Yeah, does it dilute it or increase it? I think he would have to piss it out.

Like you have to ingest and then piss it out. I don't know if they have into genitals. The bigger smaller man and then the bigger smaller man would have to then seep it into the lining of your rectum. Yeah, you'd really have to time this right. To be honest, I did, I was not imagining, I was not imagining my man with like a penis. Oh, sorry. I did.

Yeah. Quite vividly. Even though he's got an ass, I feel like he's a real kind of smooth. A smooth man. Yeah. You know what I mean? From the Smoothering family. Run a haberdashery. The Smoothering family.

Ruby and Jerry Smoothering. OK, what's after Penis? After Penis is Disney Get Out. That's the most succinct of them. I'm really torn. I like Natalie and Brilia. I'm torn. Where are you? Because I think Lady with Stiletto is the most obvious, but is it too obvious?

Disney Get Out is the most probably legitimate because- And there's the other Disney one, High Speed Chase. Disney High Speed Chase. I'm going to go Disney Get Out. Disney Get Out. I'm going to be like Ben, I'm going to be crazy like a fox. It's not the one I wanted, but. It's the one you wanted.

Lady with Stiletto. OK, interesting. Here's who wrote the answers. Lady with Stiletto was written by Amy, a.k.a. The House. Oh, they avoided that one there. Close. Manhunt ends after High Speed chase through Disneyland car park. It was Charlie.

It took me fucking 10 minutes to come up with this. It was so bad. I couldn't think of what to write. I was like, Man Hunt ends after man ends crocodile. I'm like, no, fuck it. Like it would have come out exactly the same as Lady and the Stiletto. Disney Get Out, which Charlie went for, was Ben. Oh, fuck.

That's three from three. You're in there, man. Get Out! Three out of three. Ben Get Out. I just fucking crawled up into your head. Like a little man. Like a little man. That's amazing. But it's also amazing you both went for a Disney one.

You both wrote Disney answers. Yeah. The rhyming one, which Ben Ben went for that was the house I love to pull out rhyme zone So pro apologize and that means the correct answer was Florida man claims bags of cocaine and meth Found wrapped around penis aren't his Need more information about this man's penis Sounds yeah, I give have to be right. Yeah like I need more information about this man's penis. Sounds big.

It would have to be, right? Yeah. Like, even if your average size and like your flaccid, right? Unless he's because so he's got less real estate to work with. I just seems having a big penis seems like a bad thing. In this instance, in this economy, Got him sent to jail. Like if you had a smaller penis, he would have been below a trafficable level.

Yeah, exactly. And he'd probably get off with a misdemeanor. Which is, uh, just what I tell the ladies. You're going over the misdemeanor tonight. So Ben gets a point there, the house gets another point. So, after three rounds, the scores are Charlie on one, the house on two, but out in front on three points, it's Ben Russell. All right, I'm going to have to start getting serious now.

How many- Can I win this possibly? Yeah, yeah, of course. Yeah, because there's double. Triple points is a fun round. Okay. There's still multiple rounds to go. Question of all comes from Bree from Hervey Bay in Queensland and the question is, what was the nickname of Philadelphia Eagles NFL player

Chuck Bednarick? What was the nickname of Philadelphia Eagles NFL player Chuck Bednarick? While you're writing your answers. Here's some more of that story. According to the article. Oh, here we go. About the penis drugs man.

A Clearwater man claims that drugs deputies found wrapped around his penis did not belong to him. Thirty four year old Patrick Florence was riding in a car that was pulled over after police say he was driving without its lights on early Saturday morning. The driver of the vehicle was arrested by police for DUI and possession of marijuana. A search of the car uncovered a gun under Florence's seat. The deputies searched Florence and found bags of methamphetamines and cocaine wrapped around his penis. It wasn't even for smuggling purposes, he was in his car.

I reckon he may have been selling people the dick drugs. Dick drugs. A dick drug dealer. Florence was arrested and the report said, quote, the package wrapped around his penis, he said, was not his. WFLA reports that Florence did not say who the drugs found on his person might belong to. That's so funny. These aren't mine. Whose are they? I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I didn't even know they were there until you mentioned it. Hey, while you're still writing your answer, let's go for a quick break. All right, we're back and the answers are in. Here is question number four. What was the nickname of Philadelphia Eagles NFL player Chuck Bednarik? Chipkicker? Concrete Charlie, Captain Snooze, Pignuckle or Gravy Baby.

Pignuckle and Gravy Baby are the real outliers here. Chipkicker, Concrete Charlie, Captain Snooze, Pignuckle or Gravy Baby. You're a crack here, Charlie, what do you think? I mean, you're a chuck as well. Do you ever get Chuck? Yeah, I get Chuck sometimes. Any Chuckies? Chuckies, yeah.

Chaz, I used to get a lot. My dad used to call me Chaz. That's fun. Yeah, I like Chaz. It's a versatile man. Chevy. Some people call me Chev. Chev.

But because Charlie is kind of a nickname anyway. Yeah. Like it's a very casual. I met a lot of people whose dogs are called Charlie. So there's no real need to nickname up a Charlie. I mean, I'm a Charles. If I'm going to be truthful. You're Charles and you're in charge.

I wasn't. I'm absolutely not in charge. But I reckon, I mean, the concrete one seems the most obvious. Concrete one's a good nickname. Was it concrete one? Yeah. Concrete one. Yeah. Absolutely not in charge. Oh. But I reckon, I mean, the concrete one seems the most obvious.

The concrete one's a good nickname. Yeah. Concrete. Concrete Charlie. Concrete Charlie. That's pretty wrestling. Do you think you could pull that off? Me? No. Is there like, I don't know, Tempur-Pedic Charlie?

Tempur-Pedic Charlie. Memory foam Charlie. I'm soft. Sealy needed one more time. I mean, Captain Snooze is closer to that. Toby Bedford, isn't he Snooze? Oh, yeah. Could be. But that's actually good. So there's an AFL player called Toby Bedford who they call Snooze for obvious reasons.

And that- Because he's got Bedford's name. Yes. And so that, I mean, that goes has got better his name. Yes. And so that I mean, that sort of could be a template for this. Yeah. All right. As an American, tell me with American nicknames, is it like so in Australian football, the nicknames tend to be the more sort of six degrees, the more degrees you can put between the person's name and what the outcome is like you know.

Your name is a so your name is is your surname is Morrison so then you say Scott PM pre menstrual your name is tampon that's how you get a nickname in Australian rules football. Can you make everything Tampon? Make Ben Russell Tampon. Seven degrees of Tampon. Russell, leaves, trees, products. Trees, leaves, birds, wings. Wings. Tampon. There you go. Yeah, there we go. Tampons don, birds, wings. Wings. Tampons. Yeah, there we go. Tampons don't have wings traditionally.

But do you think Americans sporting, they also like to put many degrees between the person's name and the outcome? And no, it doesn't have that cockney rhyming sort of background that Australia does. We- America likes things that sound cool. Yeah, concrete challenge. We are America likes things that sound cool. Yeah, Concrete Charlie. We are good at advertising and branding. Mm. That's kind of our thing.

Yeah. It's like the French with cheese. That's why I'm sort of a bit resistant on Concrete Charlie, because it sounds cool in isolation, but it doesn't sound good in terms of when you run the whole thing together. Chuck, Concrete Charlie. You got to think about it as the presenter is calling it out. Concrete Charlie. Concrete Charlie kicks it as the presenter is calling it out. Concrete Charlie. Concrete Charlie kicks it down the four line bowl.

He's winning me over. Can I get Ben to say all the names in that song? Sure. Chipkicker. It's the Chipkicker out. As Fort Down hits the mark. Concrete Charlie. Concrete Charlie's gone around the outside and sacked the QB.

Captain Snooze. Captain Snooze hooks it by and lands the catch. Chuck Pignuckle bedernik. The Pignuckle from the outside 50. Or Chuck Gravy Baby Bednaruk. Gravy Baby Touchdown for Gravy Baby. What in Louisiana State University? I think it's going to be Concrete Charlie from those calls.

I'm going to stick with Concrete Charlie. Blocking Concrete Charlie for Charlie. I, while doing that, to me, Pignacle sang. To me, in, in that instance. I don't know what the connection is, but maybe it's something that's like a... Because nicknames can come from little, little personal jokes. Or maybe it's college days, maybe eight more pork rinds or something than someone else. That's right. He could look... I don't know what he looks like. He could be pigish.

Yes. Have you got a photo of him? Is he pigish? Would you describe- if you looked at a photo, don't show us, but if you could describe him as pigish. Yeah. Or is this too much of a hint? Or a block of concrete, is it? Yeah. I don't- I've never heard of him.

I saw there's a- like a local wrestling- I don't know what it is in Melbourne but you know the local wrestling group up in Sydney there was a wrestler there and his name was concrete Jones and he came out like the single strap. Like a jungle unit art and like he's an old school like strong man is very very funny gimmick I saw concrete Jones is a good name. Concrete Jones is a good name. Yeah. That's like a name for a series, a TV series. Exploitation. Oh, yeah. Oh, he looks like a fucking pig knuckle.

I want to change my answer. He looks like a pig knuckle. Yeah, I'm going to lock him. He looks like the dad from The Wonder Years. His nose looks like a pig knuckle. Yeah. All right. Concrete also fits.

This could be anyone still. Yeah. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. Chipkicker. That was be anyone still. Yeah. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. Chipkicker. That was Bree, aka the house. Captain Snooze, also the house. Gravy Baby was Ben. It's the first one, Charlie.

How's it going for Ben? Again, you've got to put- I wanted to sort of stay fast and lose. Zigzag. I liked Gravy Baby though. I'd be very happy with that as a nickname. If you want to, you know, if anyone wants to start calling me that. What if it's too easy to mix up and someone calls you Baby Gravy? Oh, yeah.

You spin. Gravy Baby. Yeah, it's cum. I didn't even think about it. That would be like a cum nickname. A cum nickname. Yeah. Ben, you went for Pig Knuckle.

That was Charlie. We are swapping left and right. And that also means Charlie's correct, it's concrete Charlie. So maximum points to Charlie. They're leveling up the scores after four rounds. First time I've trusted my gut. We've got a game here, folks. The house is on two, but Charlie and Ben.

We're in overtime. This game just kicked it up a notch. Oh my God. So, I don't know if you've ever seen anything like this in your life. I've never seen anything like this. He's come from the clouds there. Question five comes from Cade from... Oh my.

I'm not done yet. It's addictive. Watch out. Minneapolis slash St. Paul in Minnesota. Okay, the Twin Cities. What's their accent there? Twin Cities? Yeah, Minneapolis. Paul in Minnesota. I care the twin cities. What's their accent there? Twin cities? In Minneapolis. Minnesota.

Minnesota. Is that my Fargoish? Yeah, Minnesota. I mean, it wouldn't be because it's more of a- it's a big city. Right. But, you know, that sort of accent is around there. Right. It'd be like Minnesota.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You'll betcha now. You'll betcha. Stort. Stort. And another American question, actually, the question is, what was the name of popular American Caramel Lollipop that was created in 1925? You're going to know this, aren't you?

A caramel. What was the name? Caramel. Caramel. Caramel. Popular American Caramel Lollipop. You got this suddenly going in your neck Can you give me a caramel correct? We had a caramel from out the back right? So it's credit in 1925 and obviously water it's a name That's what's come up here word a taffy water taffy water. Oh my god. Thank you so much. Yeah, it's some taffy Hey, oh my god, Greg. Try these mints

Excuse me, sir. I know my rights. Yeah. I was checking into a hotel in, I think it was in LA, and I was a bit jet lagged. And I just heard this woman say, oh my God, Greg, you've got to try these mints. That's good. That's a good- What a moment to have been there for.

It's like, why did you have to yell? Have you ever had a mint that's made you exclaim? No. Oh my God, Greg. I didn't even think of trying that. I probably should have got one. Neither myself nor my brother. And so I think it's definitely an environmental thing in got that, like,

American confidence. I guess you could argue that I am a comedian, so possibly yes. But I don't like talking like too loud in a room. Do you think it might have happened in Cubs? I couldn't. But I love that American confidence. I find it so charming. Me too.

And it's very direct. I remember the first time I went to New York for the first time, everyone's like, oh, New Yorkers are so pushy and rude. And I'm like, they're not rude at all. They just got places to be. Yeah. And I'm like, what do you want at all. They just got places to be. Yeah. I'm like, what do you want? Uh-huh. I can't help you. Sorry. And then they keep going.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. They're just, I don't have time. I don't have time. For this, please. But they're always very polite about it. Yeah. Yeah. I just found that Americans would be very polite. Traveling over there, it's lovely.

Especially with hospitality, my God, you realise how fucking gypped we get with hospitality in Australia when you get service in America. They're so good. But that's because- So attentive because they're working for tips. Yeah. Yeah. I worked for tips when I lived over there and it's, I made good money.

You do make good, but I worked in like a nice sort of speakeasy bar in like the West Loop. And- Is that Chicago? Chicago. Chicago. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The Windy City. Doubles. Four tree more times. Hey there, gay.

So the question is, what was the name of a popular American caramel lollipop that was created in 1925? 1925. 1925. The year was 1925. Is it? Oh, no. Okay. I was going to ask you the answer. 1925. 1925. The year was 1925. Is it? Oh no. Okay.

I was going to ask you the answer. It's not that game. While you're writing your answers, here's some more info about Concrete Charlie. According to Brie, he has been ranked as one of the hardest hitting players in NFL history. His nickname doesn't come from how hard he hits though, but from his off-season career as a concrete salesman. I hadn't read this before. That's so funny. Oh, yeah. He's a real hard hitter, but it was- the nickname came from his job.

It's like Danny Froli being spud because he grew up on a potato farm. Yeah. And his nephew being called Chips, right? Yeah. Just chip off the old block. All right. The answer in for question number five. What was the name of the popular American caramel lollipop created in 1925? Here are your answers. Here are your options.

Tootsie's Roll Pop. Oh. No Nuts. Uh-huh. The Puppasucker. Whoa. Sensory Slider. Oh yeah.

Or Lickety Split. They all sound dirty, don't they? You got Tootsie's Roll Pop. No Nuts. Tootsie Roll is a thing already, isn't it? Yeah. There's the Tootsie roll on the Tootsie roll pop. What's a Tootsie roll though?

The Tootsie roll is just like a... What would you... Sort of a Jew, like a... What did you say? A Jew. Like a Jew. Don't pause mid-word. That's true.

That's on me. There's a consonant there. I always assume Tootsie rolls were were like, what are those little- Yeah, so they're in the packaging. Spongy things with the cream in the middle. What are they called? Those are really American treats. That's a Twinkie.

Twinkie. I thought they were like Twinkies. No, Tootsie Rolls. So you got the Tootsie Roll, which is the original one, and that is like a little wrapper, and it's- but it's a harder caramel. Okay. Caramel-y-esque. It's not- they call it chocolate, but it's not. It's a real fucked up flavour.

Okay. I don't actually like the flavour. Okay. So, and this is a Tootsie Roll pop. So it could be- A Tootsie Roll pop. I mean, that's legit. Because there are Tootsie Roll pops and they taste like Tutsi rolls.

Okay. No nuts, the popper sucker, sensory slider or lickety split. Back to you, Ben. So lickety split? Yep. What was before that? Sensory slider. Before that?

The popper sucker. Before that. No nuts. Before that. Tutsi's roll pop. Sensory slider sounds too modern. Sensory. I don't know where it was invented until recently. I'm going to go for lickety split, please.

Lickety split, locking it in. What do you think, Charlie? Tootsie roll pop. Daddy's poppa's pump. What was that one? Big poppa pump? The poppa sucker. Popper sucker. Lickety split. Lickety split.

Century slider. No nuts! Popper suckers sound like- I feel like no nuts exist. I feel like I've seen no nuts somewhere. No nuts. But it's not in 20s, right? It's really advertising what it's not as well for a caramel lollipop. Yeah, it's confusing because no nuts opens up everything else.

Yeah. Which is- But what is in it? But Candy nuts opens up everything else. Yeah. Which is the- But what is in it? But Candy in America is a crazy named. Right. I'm going to go with Tootsie Roll Pop. Tootsie Roll Pop. Locking that in for Charlie.

Here's who wrote the answer. Sensory Slider. That was the house. As was No Nuts. In particular, Kade wrote that one. Tootsie's Roll Pop. Charlie, that was Ben. Is that you? I'm back in, baby!

You're back in your head. Oh, God. The way you explained it to me too, you suck at the- Okay, so that's a Tootsie's Roll Pop, but the actual candy's called a Tootsie Roll Pop. Oh, God. T-O-O-T. That is- S-I-E.

And I think it was before that, like, I think that was in like- What a betrayal that is as well. Him being your- My confidant. Currently your confidant into American culture and he's going, yeah, that's a real one. What I said was the truth, that's what made it such a great line. It was, it was excellent. But in a bit of instant karma, Ben went for Lickety Split, which was Charlie.

Ah, the turns of tables. This is a wild episode. This is, and that means the correct answer is the Puppasucker. What the fuck? Yeah, man. They changed the name, like, within a decade to... The Mum-a-fucker. To actually what it still is today, the Sugar Daddy.

Oh, yeah. Sugar Daddy. Yeah, right. That's good. Is that where the phrase comes from? Sugar daddy. I think it must be. Yeah, I wonder. Yeah. What is a sugar daddy is a rich, rich benefactor, for typically for young women.

Hmm. So that's a that's a point each that round, meaning you are both still equal in the lead. This is crazy. With two rounds to go. Question number six is from Paul McNally from Waterford in Ireland. And the question is- Wait, this is an international podcast? It is an international-

How? The question is, what happened in Dublin on October the 1st, 1941? Something happened there. You two formed. They're older than you think. We're stealing it back. Every time I clap, the Nazis rear. Stop fucking clapping.

While you're writing your answers, let me tell you more about Puppasuckers. Is it Dublin, did you say? Dublin, yeah. OK. Sugar Daddy's. According to Cade, Sugar Daddy is a candy bar on a stick manufactured by Tootsie Roll Industries, that Ben was right on the money there, that is essentially a block of moderately hard caramel. A bite-sized caramel-flavoured jelly bean candy based on the sugar daddy is marketed under the name of sugar babies. They're both still available in the US. According to the Tootsie Roll website,

created in 1925, the portable caramel lollipop... I love how portable... that must have meant at the time there were ones yet to just lick in store. I guess. Created in 1925, the portable caramel lollipop was originally called the Puppasucker, later changing its name in 1932 to suggest a wealth of sweetness, hence sugar daddy. All right, answering for question six, what happened in Dublin on October the 1st, 1941? The first sighting of the Liffey Whale, a pygmy right whale that swam in the estuary and river over the following decades a Frenchman was discovered trapped inside an upside-down crate after he had mailed himself to Dublin The Dublin Zoo was ransacked leading to the monkey colony escaping some of their descendants still live in a forest on the

forests on the outskirts of town an Some of their descendants still live in a forest on the outskirts of town. An explosion at the Guinness factory led to the death of dozens of child laborers. Or a German U-boat ran aground and the crew came and stayed at the local pub. They're all good. Back to U-Bin, I think here. U-Bin? U-Bin. We're back to U-Bin.

So, give it to me just real quick. Starting of the Liffey Whale. Yep, I like that one. Frenchman was discovered upside down in a crate. Yeah, I like that one. Dublin Zoo ransacked. Monkeys still live. No further questions.

I'm going to go the crate. Crate. OK, looking in the crate. That sounds like something a Frenchman would do. Yeah, and turn it. What's the funny, funny stereotype about a Frenchman, you know what they're like. What's the first one? First signing of the Liffey Whale. That's good. I like that.

And it is near the water. Liffey Whale. That's nature, isn't it? The zoo one seems a bit too sitcom premise. U-boat, maybe? I mean, look who's coming to dinner. That's sitcommy as hell. Yeah.

No, we are all Irishmen. Yeah. Yeah. To be sure, to be sure. I think that might be the only way I could get away with doing an Irish accent by saying, this is a German trying to do an Irish accent. I think that's how my Irish accent sounds. A quick game's a good game. I'm going to go with the whale.

What a time to come to that as a- Whale and Frenchie. Whale. OK, here's who wrote the answers. German U-boat. That was Ben Russell. Yeah, that was amazing. You're trying to tempt me in. No, I was having a good scummy. He did the opposite there, actually, I thought.

Yeah, I did. I was- Yeah, but by poo-pooing your own suggestions. That's a good reverse. Well, I didn't even think about that. You're just naturally in there. What kind of mad genius you are. I just had no respect for my own. Explosion of the Guinness factory.

That was Charlie. He didn't go for each other's this time. Dublin Zoo was ransacked. That was the house. The house in particular, Paul McNally wrote the one about the Liffey Whale, which Charlie went for, meaning Ben is correct. A Frenchman was discovered trapped upside down in a crate after he mailed him straight on that. Like, you knew. Well, it was it's It's World War Two.

Not France. To me, it sounds like it's a legitimate thing that you can be like, oh, I'm just mail it. It is quirky. It's a very French thing to do because they do all like, they're comedians are like stuntmen. Yeah, yeah. They love they love the Jerry Lewis. They love getting in a box. Marcel Marceau taught us anything. They love getting in a box. Marcel Marceau taught us anything.

They love getting in a box. Even when they're not in a box, they want to be in a box. French people are known for their food and their beauty and their architecture. And their love. Comedy, not as much. Jerry Lewis. Yeah, he's American. Yeah, Tati.

Yep. There are some. Don't get me wrong, he's American. Jacques Tati. Yep. There are some. Don't get me wrong, there are some. OK, just not. It's a... I don't think that's wrong of me. It's like when you see like it's a clip of like the French Daily Show or some French comedian who's there. And then Macron, Macron, Sacrebleu, Sacrebleu. That's good. That's cutting.

Satire. Cutting satire. Alright, into the last round. Still anyone's game here. House on three, Charlie on four, but out in front Ben on five. But this is worth triple points to you two, so truly anyone's game. The final question. We always finish with a movie synopsis. Really should be playing

into you two movie nerds' hands. If you do happen to know this slightly obscure film, to play it like you don't know it. I got it. Write a fake answer. Don't reveal to each other that you know it until afterwards. I'm just sitting there just like, ugh. Yes. Sweating.

I was in this. I was in Cop 2. All right, the final question comes from Harris. Not sure where Harris is from, but his question is, what is the synopsis of the 1979 foo- Foom. Foom. What is the synopsis of the-

Cine movie. What is the synopsis of the 1979 film Chomps? That is C.H.O.M.P.S. What is the synopsis of the 1979 movie Chomps? And while you're writing those answers, here's some more info about the Frenchman who mailed himself. According to Alan Foster in his book about historical Irish oddities, on the morning of the 1st of October 1941 a porter working on the Northwall docks in Dublin upended a large case that had been accidentally turned upside down

the night before when it was being unloaded from the ship, sleeve-borne from Liverpool. The porter thought it was his imagination when he heard tapping coming from inside the crate. He listened carefully and it started again. He tapped the case and received an answering tap from inside. He called other porters to help and the case was quickly opened. The men were amazed to find a hysterical, semi-conscious Frenchman upside down and encased in a large plaster cast. The frantic man was brought to Jervis Street Hospital. There he identified himself as 40-year-old Maurice Carrassus de Labagé, an artist with an address in London. M. de Labagé's paintings were due to go

on show in Dublin, but he was unable to obtain the necessary visa so he arranged to ship himself inside the crate to a Dublin art gallery on Molesworth Street. The Frenchman planned his trip carefully and had a plaster cast made which fitted his body and prevented him from being buffeted too severely in the packing case. He spent four days en route from London to Dublin, inside a plaster case where he couldn't move. Wild. Everything had gone to plan until a careless dock worker unloaded the packing case and left it upside down with its occupant

standing on his head and unable to do anything about it. Alright, the answers are in for the final question. It all comes down to this, anyone's game. What is the synopsis of the 1979 movie Chomps? Fed up by the lack of compassion shown by foster parents in their city, the Committee for Helping Orphans Move Past Sorrow, or Chomps, is formed by former foster kids. Their attempt to create a safe space for these kids is foiled by a real estate mogul who himself was an orphan but believes in toughness over hugs Oh fucking hell. Hmm.

A Japanese documentary chomps Also known as cooking hibachi on my patio solo HAHAHAHAHAHA Looks at one of the pioneers in hibachi cooking. A lot of questions from this one. Yeah, I've seen how his technique was reduced to lowest common denominator dinner theatre. He retired to a house in Osaka. It's too much stuff. I can't be bothered.

Where once a year he runs an invitation only feast showing how real Hibachi is done. OK, I'm going to say I'm just going to pick the one that sings to me. OK, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not going to think about it. OK, me too. Cryptozoologist Dr Raymond Hadley is on the hunt for the lost land shark. His team of crack animal specialists, including his alluring wife Brenda, search the ruins of an ancient Babylonian city until the hunters become the hunted

and a fight for survival begins. Oh, my God. Then you've got CHOMP stands for Canine Home Protection System, a robot dog used for home protection when a bunch of ne'er-do-wells decide to dognap CHOMP's hijinks in shoo. Yep. Or finally- It sure does. And finally, in a dystopian city, the future of law enforcement is chomps. Cybernetic hardware of Metro Police Services.

OK, so you got the... I'm going to say My Heart Sings, it's the dog. The dog? The dog one. My Heart Sings, it's the cop. Is that the final one? Yeah. Metro Police Services. All right, locking that in for Ben and Charlie. I love it. You just went straight for

what what sang to you. Yeah. What a strategy. What a funny lopsided show this has been. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. Harris, aka The House, wrote the one for about the Committee for helping orphans move past sorrow. That was a good one.

That feels like it could be a movie. Harris also wrote the one that was cooking hibachi on my patio solo. That was the worst. You're a real there too, Wolves Inside. The one about the cryptozoologist Dr Raymond Hadley, who's looking for the lost land shark. Man, I believe this to be a 1979 movie. That was Ben Russell. I just go for the era.

That's good though. Yeah. And you're also the one who taught me about whales being like some sort of horse that went back into the sea. That's Ben Russell's favourite. What you're about to do is invoke Ben Russell's favourite fact. Okay. The thing that I've told the most people about so much so that people are like, yeah,

Ben, but whales, they used to be like hippo type elephant creature. Right. Land dwelling. Yeah. And then they went out, they would wait out in the Tethys Sea, which was an old sea, and then to get their prey and then they slowly... Were they always that big? No, they got big. Because they all of a sudden they weren't restricted by anything. Yeah.

So, yeah, it's a great fact. Yeah. And I apologise for... The land shark feels like a reverse whale. Yeah, yeah. If it can happen one way, it can happen again. Yeah. Land shark sounds like a way, it can happen the other. It can happen again. Yeah. Landshark sounds like a sci-fi TV made for television.

I was going for like a Corman style. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Ben, you went for the one about the cops, about cybernetic hardware of Metro Police Services. That was Charlie. Oh, shit. And Charlie got the correct answer. K9 Home Protection System.

Charlie Klassen correct answer. Canine Home Protection System. Charlie Classen from downtown. With a body man. That was a great comeback. Just from the clouds. Wow. With the kind of fight and dare that the Sinclair football club has never shown in 21 years. Yeah, it's normally the opposite.

We're more of a Ben type leading into the love thing. And then Choke. You guys are the Chokers? Uh, yeah, you know. You know what's funny? I think what actually helped me then is I got too frustrated trying to write a synopsis. So I just did the briefest thing and I think that allowed the theatre of the mind to take over. If I had, because I started to write, rookie, you know, Johnny Storm turns up and I was like,

don't do that. I got it. Yeah, you know, Johnny Storm turns up and I was like, don't do that. I guess it's too... Yeah. It worked out for you. While I'm adding up the scores, Rotten Tomatoes gives it... It doesn't have a critic score, but audience have a 28% approval rating. And Tracy Moore from Common Sense Media wrote, cheesy slapstick comedy with a near-death dog scene.

That's what I'm looking for. Two out of five. She didn't like it. What does that near-death dog scene. That's what I'm looking for. Two out of five. She didn't like it. What does that near death dog scene? What does that mean? The dog nearly died in the scene? I think so. And she- and she- because common sense media, I think, is for people to go to see if

their kids should be able to watch it. So she's warning just in case any of your kids are dog people. I recently- for obvious reasons, rewatching Mad Max's. And in the original Mad Max, there's a scene where the cop, the guy falls off the bike and the tyre- Yeah, hits him in the head. Hits him in the fucking head and he got incredibly hurt by that. And so I was watching that, I was like-

Guy Norris, right? I think he's the guy who gets hit. Yeah, I was watching it going, oh, that did does not look right. It's almost done. It did not look. Well, they shot that film with no permits. It literally just out in Werribee. Just riding on these, like, unsealed roads. And so cool. That's great.

I love it. It's Werribee, is it? Well, it's out that way. Yeah, that's amazing. There should be tours of that. When the Weekly Planet did their episode on it. I mean, that's the thing that kept coming back to it. it looks like on the way to Werribee Surridge Farm. It's just like, and I was like, it's not really like futuristic dystopian Australia, it's just Australia in the 70s.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, because all the cars are like just Falcons from the- Yeah, that's right, XP. 1977 or something. All right, so final score check in third place on three points. Yeah. It's the house. In second place on five points, it's Ben Russell. Listen, it was a good game, ultimately.

In the end, way out in front on ten points, it's Charlie Clausen. Yeah, that double triple got you. I'm pretty sure you're undefeated on this show. I didn't do it twice, so. That's good. Ben North Bend's a big winner on here, too. So this was a real clash of the titans. Yeah.

Kingslayer. And it was a good game. It was a good game. Fought it in the right spirit. It wasn't like a- because the- it wasn't like a grand final game. No. Because they're always boring. This was more- it was more like a- an exhibition match.

Yeah. It was Harlem Globetrotters playing the Harlem Globetrotters. It's a, yeah, exhibition game. We get to have a drink afterwards. Yeah. No, let's not get injured. That's all I know. Yeah. I think- Drink at half time. It felt good.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Socialise. Yeah. It felt good. Yeah. So that brings us to the end of the episode. People should hang around to listen afterwards.

I have a funny feeling this will have a long post-credit scene and it might be a lot of chat about 80s movies. But, um, where can people find you? this will have a long post credit scene and it might be a lot of chat about 80s movies. Where can people find you? So, everybody relax feed. Everyonerelax.co, that's the website where you'll find all your everyone relax information. Or you can just follow me on Twitter at CXClawson on Twitter, Charlie underscore Clawson on Instagram. How about you, Ben? You can find me on Instagram at imbenrussle and on X, I like to call it X. Oh yeah.

Call Ben Russell's and I've got a show at the Replay Festival at Comedy Republic coming in, what, July 13th and 14th. Oh, cool. I think we're there that day doing a Do Go On quiz show maybe on the 13th or something. Yeah. I should also plug, so Will and I are doing live shows. We're doing a run of live shows at the Basement Comedy Club. There's one tonight but people, tomorrow night people won't be able to see that when they're listening to this. But July 6th and August 3rd at the Basement Comedy Club. Go to everyonerelax.co. Don't go to August 3rd because, unless it's after 3 o'clock, because we're doing a live

Who Knew It on- Yeah, we're after 3. We're doing a live Who Knew It on- Do the double then. At basement? No, at Comedy Republic. Okay. Well yeah, you can- It's an easy walk across between those two. What a double that'd be.

Do both. What a great double header. Yeah. Thanks everyone for tuning in. Thanks for listening. Give us a five star review, why not? You can follow us at whoknewitpod on all the social medias and cheers for tuning in, thanks for listening, give us a five star review, why not? Uh, you can follow us at whonewitpod on all the social medias, and cheers for tuning in to Who Knew It with Matt Stewart. Now that you know it, I've been Matt Stewart, goodbye!

["Who Knew It?" by Matt Stewart plays in the background.] Okay, um, alright, so we've got the triple-breasted lady of the night. Which just takes me to Total Recall. Total Recall reference. So far in the episode, it's crazy. Yeah, that's because I was like, I... Quite a lot. Is this deja vu? Yeah.

And literally, I was watching a clip of Total Recall. Which one? Two weeks? Yes. Yeah. Is that doing the rounds or something? No, it's just one of the most memorable moments in that film. It's so good. Yeah, it's in that film. It's so good. Yeah, it's awesome that film. I don't think I've seen it through.

I've only ever- What? Yeah, I should watch it. My god. One of those ones that used to always be on Channel 10 every time you turn on the TV. It's fantastic. I'll suck up any little bits that Paul Verhoeven has to give. I think I saw that, I mean, I'm older than you guys, but I saw that at the cinema. Total Recall. Oh, wow. Because it was rated R when it came out and I would have been like 14 at the time.

What do you think of the reboot? Didn't see it. Is that the Colin Farrell one? Yeah, yeah. I probably don't think it's very good. It's not good. Yeah. It's about the same quality as the Robocop remake.

It's the Verhoeven of it all. Yeah. I mean, it's not the premise that you're tuning in for. It's the insane amounts of violence and, you know, inappropriate European. What is European, right? Yeah, but it's also he always uses like the most base kind of images to convey. It's always got something below it. Yeah. It's got my favourite line.

I mean, look, Arnie has been over quoted and imitated, but in the opening scene, he wakes up from a nightmare and Sharon Stone is playing his wife is like, who are you dreaming about? Who are you dreaming about? You dream about her, won't you? And he's like, come on, baby, you know, you're the girl of my dreams. It's such a McBain. Come on on baby. I watched it. I'm just like when he says consider the divorce and it's like three days in the middle.

Consider the divorce. Yeah, so he's a Dutch guy, Paul Verhoeven. He's making another film. I just watched Starship Troopers the other day. That is awesome too. That's fun. But what a run he had. It was Robocop Total Recall Basic Instinct. Showgirls Starship Troopers.

I mean, I've heard of all of those. Showgirls is a great comedy. Is that the one Burt Reynolds? No, that's Striptease, which is also a great comedy. Yeah, right. Showgirls is saved by the bell, Elizabeth Berkley. Entering the fast paced Berkley. Yeah. Entering the fast paced world of Vegas stripping.

But they both came out about the same time. It was like the Amps and Bugs Life sort of thing. I think the strip-teasing thing was most famous because it was the highest payday for an actress to that point. She got 20 million dollars. Demi Moore. Demi, yeah. Demi.

That's a fair payday. Anyway, what are we? This is the most subtracted. The three breasted lady of the night. Oh man, does he look like Dennis Hopper, the little man in your bum? I've been meaning- Thank you for reminding me, I've been meaning to watch Speed again. It's been too long. When was the last time you've watched Speed?

Oh, it would have been 20 years, I reckon. Mm-hmm. It's a good film, from what I remember. Yeah. Keanu at his, like, sort of peak kind of Keanu-esque. Yeah. That sort of surfer dude persona. Yeah.

Yeah, it would have been on a hot streak then. Yann DeBont. That's got another great opening action sequence where the elevators all rigged up to blow and Keanu turns up with Jeff Daniels and they're all macho SWAT teams and they're like is there anything that could stop the fall of the elevator and Keanu's like yeah the basement. That's an amazing Keanu. Thank you. That is really good. And you played I saw one of those roles you did was an American tourist right so you can do American. Yeah Wolf Creek I was an American tourist who got killed by an Australian archetype.

How'd that feel? Ah, good. Yeah, it felt real good. I felt proud of my country. We never liked Americans, you see, in this country. Yeah, that's- Especially in cubs. It goes all the way back to cubs, which is an American thing. No, no, it turned out I was the kid. The problem with-

From your cubs. Yeah, that'd be- Wow, Perth? Yeah. The thing is, is that then they're not wrong. Like, I'm an American and I agree that Americans can be, as a country, as a government, absolutely the fucking worst. I suppose Australia, where you would say we're the best.

You know, Australia, Australia, every- and you see it when Halloween rolls around, they get these people just like, it's a body of America and the bloody American. I thought those people had given up, haven't they? That used to is that still the still like a resistance? Yeah, yeah. And it's so dumb. It's the good stuff. It's dumb as well, because they're the same people generally who love wearing like Australian

flags and stuff, you know, at Australia Day saying, let's do Australian things, you know, like celebrating our national day in a real American way. My theory is that they're all dentists. Oh, right. Because dentists hate sweets. Ah, that makes sense. I hate sweets! I live in a, like a small town in the Northern Rivers and they started up a service like a long straight that that's the trick-or-treat straight so on Halloween that's where everyone knows to go but they had to shut it down because. When you live in the country like you got these are satellite too many pedophiles not that kids from neighboring towns would like let's hit up this street because we know this free lolly

So you have like teenagers rocking up and their costume is like I'm wearing my footy jumper Yeah, give me some lollies And so they were like ransacking all these houses and getting all the lollies before the kids get to them So they had to shut it down. I'll tell you what teens don't have it. You can't have good stuff No, not anymore. Yeah, not anymore. Not like the good old days. Yeah, you could shoot him No, not anymore. Yeah? Not anymore. Not like the good old days. Yeah.

Where you could shoot him. Horio de Griebe is like the person who wins Big Brother that you didn't notice for the entire season. It's like, oh, what? Oh, yeah, of course they're going to win. Reggie? Yeah. Think of him more like Trevor.

Remember Trevor? Trevor. Remember when he won third season? He does radio up in the Gold Coast, I think. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And Ben, did he win one year?

He won the first one. Yeah. With the- Gentle Ben. Gentle Ben. And did- Say how many we can name from the start. Blayde.

Blake. Blayde. Blayne. Blair. Blair. He was runner up in the first. He was on Neighbours. Yeah. Was that in your era? He lives up near me as well now. Blair.

What's he doing? I don't know. I think he runs like some kind of hospitality thing. That's nice. He got out. So let's see. Who won the first one was Peter. Second one was? First one was Ben, I think. Oh, Ben.

Or was it Peter? Or was it Peter? Which one was Hot Dogs? That was like season four or five. Four or five. He's a real estate agent in Perth now. Is he? Yeah.

Really? I thought he was a TV producer. No, we- I mean, God, he came up on our podcast a couple of weeks back and we actually- Deep dived on him. Yeah, he's a real estate agent. That's a golden- Which, the least surprising career transition. That channel, the Uplate with Hot Dogs, is a true sort of like just a moment in TV history. Cultural touchstone.

Just to allow that on air seems to be crazy to me. Yeah. Well, it's essentially a gambling show, right? Yeah. That they passed off as entertainment. Yeah. Yeah. Uplate with hot dogs. What a weird- Do you remember he got a blowjob or something in an alleyway outside a nightclub during like, he did some kind of nightclub appearance. It does not surprise me that he is a real estate agent.

Either of those things don't surprise. The tea bagging all makes sense now. He got busted by the police. Oh, he was a tea bag. No, he wasn't tea bag. No, that was different. That was Saxon. And...

Saxon, your memory of this is amazing. That was the golden era of Big Brother. That's when I was really into it the first four seasons. It was so the Wild West. Yeah. Of television. Oh my God, there's no way you can get away with it now. I mean, essentially, like, they would do the normal 730 slot and then 930,

they'd do a version with just old boobs. and it's like, this seems explosive. Yeah. Yeah. It was boobs and dicks remember because there was one guy and everyone's like tonight we're gonna reveal who's got the biggest dick. Can you imagine you signed up to this reality show? Like that'd have to brief you beforehand right to say look obviously we're gonna be filming you showering. There may be a segment on who's got the biggest dick. Are you comfortable with that? Yeah, even there might be a radio job in it for you after. Yeah.

Even having a camera in a bathroom these days, you couldn't do it. No, I've tried. The guy on the cubicle next to me was very pissed off. You were doing your, you were vlogging. It was a red. Big DSLR. Just like a boom mic. My sound recorders come in after it.

Sound speed. Isn't that where Stephen King sets all his. Really? Yeah, I think so in Maine. Yeah. That's right. Hawkeye Pierce from Mash is from Maine. Alan Alda. Yeah. Anyway, I've watched all. Ask me a mash question, dude.

Oh, OK, because here's what did what was Colonel Potter most looking forward to when he got back to America? No. Chocolate cake and a glass of milk. Chocolate cake and a glass of milk. Yeah. Were you more of a Colonel Potter or a Henry guy? Listen, I have to say Henry.

Yeah, me too. He was more lovable. Yeah. That's like asking if I liked BJ Honeycutt over Trapper. Yeah. I mean, who's going to say BJ Honeycutt? I didn't mind BJ, but you're right. He was too sweet.

He was just like, there was nothing wrong with him. Yeah. He had it all. Well, I think by then Alan Alder probably had more control of the show. Yeah. Well, that's why Trapper left. Was that right? Yeah. And that's the real, that's the real lowdown.

Because it was supposed to be, they're supposed to share it. They were supposed to be co-leads. That's so interesting. Yeah. Whatever happened to that guy Trapper? What's his name? I don't remember. I see him around in like old servers.

He now lives in my ass. Tells people when they're going to die. Wayne Rogers. Oh, so he never not going to die. Wayne Rogers. Oh, so he never went on to do anything that I can remember. If I don't remember it, it never happened. Wayne Rogers. Oh, wow. His full name, William Wayne Macmillan Rogers the Third. That's a pretty good name.

I think he was on Gilligan's Island. Yeah. Yeah. He's like a TV guy. Is he? Yeah, like from that era. Yeah, 70s. His final role was in 2003, a character called Gunn Schnook in Nobody Knows Anything, which is not clickable on Wikipedia. Wow.

Suggests it wasn't. It's funny that I know that we're getting so distracted, but it is funny to think like back then, you had to pick. It's like TV or film. Oh yeah. That's that's it. To entertainment. Yeah.

Yeah. They it was really hard to make the jump. Some people did. Shirley Long tried. Yeah. With mixed success. Yeah. But even like the SNL guys.

Yeah. They're kind of part of that. I used to work in a video store in the 90s and the amount of kind of like new releases that would be some character from SNL was getting their own spin-off maybe like, it's Pat. It's like, who's going to see this? Who's dying for a Night at the Roxbury movie? I saw that in a movie marathon.

Night at the Roxbury. With Fast City Blues. And I can't remember what marathon. Night at the Roxbury with Fast City Blues. And I can't remember what happened to Chris Catan. He was quite talented. Does he still do? I think he hurt his back or something. Yeah, I don't know if that got it. Because everyone seems to talk quite highly of Chris Catan. Right. Except for Norm MacDonald.

Yeah. Have you ever heard Norm MacDonald go on about Chris Catan? Oh, he's brutal. Does not like, did not like him, did not care for him. I would hate- that would be the worst. To get Norm Macdonald. Yeah. Yeah, making fun of you. To get Norm Macdonald.

Like, to have him hate you. Yeah. Oh, cause you know he's- Yeah. That's a real- to know him and then have him hate you. Have you read Norm Macdonald? He wrote a memoir a couple of years before he died. And I read it.

Based on a true story, something like that? Something like that. Yeah. And then you get sort of halfway through it because it's so wild and it sort of jumps around and then you realise halfway through that's all bullshit. Like none of it's real. It's like, motherfucker, I got halfway through this thing. That's funny. None of these memoirs, like, you know, stories from behind the scenes of SNL, it's like, is know, stories from behind the scenes of SNL.

It's like, is this real? Did this happen or not? It's called Based on a True Story, Not a Memoir. Right. That's awesome. Yeah, I've just got it recently, actually. Oh, I'm glad to know that ahead of time. Yeah.

Anyway, this is going to be like a three hour. I know you guys have. It's funny because we always get to the end of episodes with Ben on and he goes, Jeez, that went on for a while. I'm like, I was trying. Try to keep it so long. I said, I will if- I hate silence. I thought that was the point. I thought the questions were just kind of more like a framework in which we can discuss the works of Paul Verhoeven. 100%. I should- I think Verhoeven. 100%. I should.

I think Verhoeven is one of my favorite directors. Of that era he's definitely in his own category. Him and John McTiernan in terms of like. John McTiernan, yeah. Yeah, Tiernan, sorry. In just being able to pull off spectacle entertainment but that also has some substance to it. And you can tell because when they do the sequels to their films, there worse like look what Rene Harland did with Die Hard still an entertaining film but just lacks the depth and emotional gravitasity original Die Hard. You know what I watched this is crazy because I watched Die Hard with a Vengeance like three nights ago.

I love that film. It's a fantastic film you do not remember how it falls apart at the end. Because it has- They go to the shipping yard. They go to the ship. They jump onto a ship from a bridge. That's right. They- they surf a big wave in a pipe.

I don't remember. On a big dump truck. Oh, that's right. A dump truck. And then it just keeps going. So even after that, there's another ending. Yeah. And then the guy gets in a helicopter and chases them with that. And he is he actually Hans Gruber's brother or is he just making that up?

He's Hans Gruber's brother. He actually is. Yeah. But it is- Looking for revenge. Yeah. That's- Yeah. I had a little, I did Die Hard with a Vengeance and then Lethal Weapon 3.

Oh yeah. And then I was like, fuck it, Lethal Weapon 1. Yes, it's amazing. It is so good. Don't you think it's dark, Lethal Weapon 1? Like, yeah, because originally I heard that like Shane Black's script was a lot darker, you know, he's a suicidal cop. He was, yeah, and with the second film it was meant to be Riggs dies at the end, but obviously Warner Brothers wanted to keep it dark. at the end but obviously Warner Brothers wanted to keep it going. And so they used that original script for Lethal Weapon 2 is called Play Dirty, which

apparently has disappeared. You can't find it anywhere. Shane Black's original script for Lethal Weapon 2 because it's meant to be like horribly violent and it ends with rigs like getting murdered, all this kind of stuff. But now Shane Black is coming to Australia to make a film called Play Dirty and I'm wanting to know is this his original, is he just re-dusted off Lethal Weapon 2? Are you going to be able to get yourself on it? I doubt it.

But you can do a great American. Yeah, I could be cop number one getting shot by not Martin Reade. I want you to just say these, just say, so my wife thinks that I should get a boat because I'm two weeks to retirement. You know, I'm gonna see little Susie's first baseball game this weekend, I can't wait. I'm gonna take her to prom. Hey, check this out.

It's a picture of my little girl. I've just come up with a cure for cancer and I'm gonna tell everyone to. What are we doing anymore? What are we even doing here? Just, I think it's best to not really overthink it sometimes and just, just get it out. You know what I mean? Okay.

Yep. Just let it all- Let it flow. Get into a fugue state if you can. Okay. There's something trying to get out of my butt. Yep, that'll happen. You're cursed now.

Matt, what's your favourite... What's your favourite thing? One element of football. Oh, you have to pick one thing, whether it's catching the ball. Oh, inside the game. Yeah. An activity. So one short activity is that. So is it a big handball?

Do you love a handball? Oh, me? If I was playing? No. No. Watching. Just about. I think that I think the classic thing that people love apart from Goldsbygd's scored is when your team

lays a great tackle. There's a moment the whole crowd is calling Ball. They want it to be called holding the ball. That umpire waits a beat and does their holding the ball signal and everyone goes Yeah. Yeah. Right. That's maybe that. So you like umpiring?

The umpires I'm mainly there to see. What about you? Is there any big fans of like, A4 umpire fans? I think there was a kid that got a bit of attention a few years ago who'd go wearing umpire clothes and getting the autographs off the umpires and stuff. Yeah, but he was taking the piss, clearly. Yeah, I don't know, looking at him, maybe he was, but... How do you get into umpiring?

You start at a local level. It's like footy, yeah, you start at the local level and you work your way up. Yeah, but it's like wanting to be a cop. Yeah. It's the sports equivalent of a cop. Yeah, how do cops get in? They start at local level and you work your way up. Yeah, but it's like wanting to be a cop. Yeah. It's a sports equivalent of a cop. Yeah. How do cops get in? They start at local level as well. That's actually a great premise for a film.

Like you do a version of The Departed, but one guy gets into playing footy, but his friend, but you know, the other kid, he guns an umpire, but there's some kind of like, you know, there's sort of corruption there. Yeah, that's not bad. I like it. So I'm still going on this. And then at the end, you could have a rat. Yeah, across the screen.

But we have to be a football mascot. So, what would be the most appropriate? What's the most treacherous animal? What's the most rodent like mascot? Well, the Tassie devil will be coming in soon. Yeah, I think the devil will be the closest. Kangaroo is like a big rat, I guess. Cat. Cat.

Cat. Domestic cat. Yeah, the domestic cat. Yeah, feral cat. Yeah, I mean, they don't specify Geelong as the cats, but their mascot just looks like a standard house cat. I don't know why you'd go with that. And they won last year, didn't they? Two years back. Two years back. Who won last year? Collingwood.

Yeah, right. And they're the bad guys. Oh, yeah, they used to be, I think. Now the Saints are the bad guys. Uh, we're just playing board football. We're the bad footballers. You're both Saints fans? Both Saints fans. So who would you objectively, who would you say is the villain?

Of the AFL? Yeah. Collingwood. Yeah, probably because they won recently. Yeah, because they're the biggest in the Southern Easy Target. I'd say- They're the biggest. If you're talking about just like in terms of is there a villainous club, one that's done more arch things? Just in terms of the grand, I'm not talking about all the horrible shit that the AFL is responsible for in real life.

The most corrupt AFL club is Carlton, without a doubt. Yeah, right. Yeah. And they're open about that. Corrupt. Like, yeah, they used to sort of pay people under the table and cook the books. And yeah, right. Through the 70s and 80s, they were notorious for kind of like poaching players with like, oh, well, you know, we will pay you up to the salary cap, but then we'll also give you like a McDonald's, you know, franchise. You can generate a second ink. Even like Chris Judd, relatively recently got some sort of ambassadorial role.

Yeah. So what about in terms of just the narrative of on the field? I think because I think it's usually the club that's been dominating recently. So three or four years ago, Richmond were the villains because they'd won three and five years before that it was Hawthorne. Hmm. Yeah, I liked- because I don't follow, but I enjoy watching. And didn't you write for a footy show? No, I did warm up.

I did warm up for it, right? So, Charlie, just to give you credit, I don't know anything about football. And I'm tired of pretending to know about football. And I think that it's actually making it more interesting to be- To just be honest and be like, I don't fucking know anything. Yeah. And I know I'm okay. Because I like this.

Yeah. I enjoy you telling me about the villains. Yeah. I think Eagles. Oh, yeah. Well, they're enjoy you telling me about the villains. Yeah. I think Eagles. Oh, yeah. Well, they're like the cult of the West. Yeah. Because they're so big. They're so big and they're very successful. Mm, and they have, I think, the most obnoxious fans.

Right. Because they'd be so used to winning as well. Any fans that are just used to it coming around? West Coast fans are all rich and they're all like super like, how we're fucking good. Right. Yeah, that's my vibe from being around their fans. The last few years they've been humbled a little. Yeah.

Who? Eagles. Yeah. The thing about, I mean, you from Perth, like it's an awesome place. So when the Eagles aren't playing well, it's like, oh, we've got this amazing- Yeah, we'll just go to the beach. We'll just go to one of the million, like, free beaches here where the parking, you don't have to pay for parking or go down to Cloddersloe or-

Yeah, I like that session. I like City Beach. Or hug a quokka. Get a photo with a quokka. Yeah. People still do that? I used to live on Rotnest. Oh, really?

And I- when you live there, the cro- the Quokkas are kind of- Verman. Yeah. Ah. Around the settlement. That's where you have a Quokka at the end of our corruption, AFL corruption unit. You got to get away from people, because people will ruin- ruin Quokkas, because they turn all rodent-y.

Ah. They're like big- they're getting the bins and everything. Okay. Yeah, they're fucked. But they're still cute. They're- Yeah, they're so cute. They're rats with good PR. Right. They look like they're smiling at the camera.

And even the ratty ones are still cute. Yeah, and they've got the buck teeth. I think rats are kind of cute as well. Rats have got bad PR. I think rats are cute. Yeah, it's weird how they're... I guess it's because of the plague, right? They've never recovered from that.

Yeah, and they're also aggressive too. Oh, they eat meat. Yeah, they do. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But when I see a rat in the city, I don't go, ah! No. Do you like that in general? Are there like snakes or spiders or any creepy crawlies?

Because we- I was working on- at a place that had a tarantula on set. And people were like, oh, it's a tarantula. I'm like, it's. Spiders are like so important. They creep me out. I get it. I respect them. They creep me out. The way they move upsets me. Well, that's because they're hydraulic gas powered.

Yeah. Really? They move their carapace and their legs through shifting, like air and gases. They don't have muscles. No. Yeah, right. I don't believe so. Their muscles don't work in the same way. They're not the same kind of muscles. They're actually like steampunk. They are.

Oh, like Wild Wild West. That's why they move so, like, like weird. Yeah, right. Yeah. And that's unsettling. But I enjoy them. I don't want a strange, I think a strange spider, like a spider stranger. A stranger spider. Spider stranger danger.

Like an unknown spider. I don't want them anywhere near me. Because I might be poisonous or? Yeah. Well, see, that's the other thing. Like spiders aren't aggressive. Yeah. There's no like where you get snakes and rats. See, that's the other thing, like spiders aren't aggressive. Yeah. There's no like where you get snakes and rats, you have that aggression, where spiders, they

don't- They don't want to fight. If you mess with them. Well, you know, like redbacks, I only found this out recently, that redbacks are only dangerous to very young children and very elderly people. They have this reputation as being this like deadly, but they're- one of them, one of us would be more likely be fine. Right. We get to hospital.

But it's only kids. It's like, oh, I could kill a kid or an old person. Where's my reputation? Even though spiders are so squashable as well. Like if you- Like, I don't. You shouldn't. No, I don't.

You're good. I don't, but I'm like, if it comes to it comes to it, if it's me or them, I'm not. Huntsmen especially. Don't kill Huntsmen. I never squash them, I just leave them be. I love seeing a spider. I'll kill a fucking cockroach though. Yes! I hate cockroaches. I hate cockroaches and they gross me out. I'll flush them down the toilet. I think out of all the insects, they're not. No deal.

We don't get many of them out here though do we? No, up where I live there's heaps. There's a lot in Perth. I get snakes too. I had to get a whip snake removed from my front yard. See I like snakes. Snakes are funny. I don't want to like-

I don't know enough about them. Like I've been trying to educate myself because I live with browns and red bellies and all this kind of stuff and I just see snake. Like I cannot tell the fucking difference. Like there's the guy who caught my whip snake, which is venomous, but not fatal. He was pointing it out to me. He said, it looks exactly like a brown, but a brown has like a white ring around the eye, the other way around. And I was like, I'm not getting it.

And I fucking cliked. And night course on him or something. Yeah. I don't want to get near a brown snake. Yeah, they are aggressive. Yeah. Yeah. But they're amazing.

I understand why they are around, but I don't. They're dangerous. They're they're more like dangerous scary because I don't want to get bitten by a snake. No guy died within like 45 minutes after getting bitten by a brown like two weeks ago on the Gold Coast. All right. Cause it's pretty rare though. Is it? I think it's pretty rare for people to die from snake bites. Because they can do that in the ambulance if you tell them if. If you go bit by snake, it was this one. They go put the anti-venom in.

Yeah. Which is why I meant to like take a photo of the thing that just bit you. It's like, I'm not going to fucking hear that. Yeah. According to CBS News. What was the last thing to bit you? Dog. Oh.

My dog. My daughter. She bit my nose like three days ago. I got stung by a bee last week. Really? How does that feel like? I can't remember. It was I was like, ah, yeah, it was just- As a kid it's come worse together. Yeah, I remember it being worse as a kid.

I pulled out the- Oh, the stinger. The stinger. That thing gave its life just to annoy you slightly. Yeah, and it was all it was. I was expecting it to like flare up or something. I just put ice on it and it didn't even know about it the next day. Blue bottle was the last, that was the last bad sting I had. I had like a tentacle wrapped around my arm and that was significantly more painful. Oh, yeah.

I thought. That's a, stingers are tied to a like a core memory for me. Oh, right. Because my dad was learning. We're in near Rutness, like going there for a holiday. My dad was we're in real deep water because we sort of just trying to swim in open water. Just for fun. Yeah.

Nothing to worry about in Western Australia swimming in open water. Yeah. It was fine. And I swam into like a big swarm of jellyfish. Oh, that's the worst. And dad like, fucker, grabbed me and had to swim with me to the shore and I was just covered in- Oh my God. That would have been terrible. That would have been terrifying.

It was crazy. People still thought pissing on you was the way to fix it. No, no, no, we had vinegar on hand. Right. Yeah. You had vinegar on hand but your dad was still like, come on, guys, come on, boys. Yeah. Ben's covered in jellyfish.

Have you got vinegar on hand for fish and chips or just for this reason? No, I think for that reason. Yeah. Prepared. Your dad's always prepared. He was a scout. I also think that someone like it's their stingers on the beach. Scouts are the always be prepared.

There's going to be vinegar around. No. Yeah, be prepared. Be prepared. Dib, dib, dib, dob, dobers on the beach. Scouts are the always- There's going to be people moving around. No. Yeah, beeper bed. Yeah, dip, dip, dip, dub, dub, dub. Yeah. Apparently about 200 people are hospitalised each year in Australia because of brown snakes, but only a handful of fatal attacks are recorded each year. There you go.

Yeah. What are we doing? I can't- This is- Oh yeah, answers are in. Yeah, so I took too long. Beverly Hills Cop. Starring Eddie Murphy. Yep. Yeah, it's a great series of movies. Yes. Well. Except for the third one.

And then the second one. I kind of like the second one. Okay. You got Bridget Nielsen. Nielsen. You got, hello. But English. Alan Rickman.

No, he's like a famous English theatre actor. Yes. He was and he's got that mole in the middle of his forehead. Yes. Isn't he the first one? He's in the first one. Okay. I don't really remember much about the second one.

I just remember watching it with my mum and dad on VHS and my dad turning to my mum after half an hour and all I've seen this guy do is curse, call women bitches and shoot his gun. Yeah, it's awesome. It's pretty cool, right, dad? Okay. Well, who's the bad guy in number two? I can't remember. I got mixed up.

I know that's the one where he ends up at the Playboy Mansion, isn't it? And he says, follow your dick. Have you seen the trailer for the new Beverly Hills? Is it a TV show or a movie? It's a movie. Have you seen the trailer for the new Beverly Hills? Is it a TV show or a movie? It's a movie. Have you seen it? I've seen the trailer. Looks so unfunny.

Oh, for shame. I can't believe Taggart's still alive, though. Yeah. That's good to see. Yeah, it is nice. I hope he's well. Hmm. Taggart the...

Is that the cop? The older of the two, not judge not judge Ryan hold the older cop Oh, that's good Danny Glover of that particular buddy judge judges back in this one Yeah, I heard judge fell on tough times, but it's good to see you might be coming back in real life. Yeah. Yeah, well we won't judge him What are the Irish stereotypes and I can get away this because my mother's Ireland McSweeney, so I can. Okay. As opposed to what you were talking about three hours ago about the Italians. The Italians, I've got all the permission there because as I explained, I watched Arthur Fonz around.

Can't anyone be, we can all, everyone in this room can be mean to Irish people. Oh, wait, because we've all got Irish blood? Right. Aren't we all like, yeah, you know, you're Stuart, I mean, you're- Yeah, my mum's side's very Irish. Do you want to hear an amazing story about- I think it's Scottish, though. About Ireland.

So my mother is second generation Irish. I'd never been to Ireland. For my 40th, my friends bought me a ticket to go back to My the town where my family the Sweeney's first left which is called a Galvin near cork So me and my wife went there and just tiny little one-horse town Like one pub like, you know cemetery few houses, but not much else and my cousin had drawn this map that she traced a family tree She said I think there's like a property like nine miles south of this town. There's only one road south, so we jump on this little road we're driving around. There's just nothing around. And my cousin had written that it seemed to be located the original family home between like a bog, the Slani River, and this mountain. And so

we're just driving going, and then I see this mountaintop, and then I see what looks like a bog, and then I see a river. I'm like, okay, so we pull over. We don't know it's exactly the right place, but we take some photos. I collect some slate stone and stuff, and then we're driving back through Kilgarvan, and I'm like, you know what? Let's stop at the pub. I'll have a Guinness in honor of my ancestors. So while we're drinking, the guy's like, oh, why are you here?

And I said, I'm on this family history tour with my Sweeney's. He's like, oh, I wonder if they're related to Nels when he lives across the road. So we exit the pub, he knocks on the door, this old lady answers the door. She's like in the 80s and she's like, come in, come in. And she sits us down and she just starts talking at us. And we're like, oh, my God, it's got dementia or something. And she's rabbiting on about all the people have come to see her. And she pulls down this big box from a cupboard and it's filled with documents.

And we start going through these documents and it's like, you know, travel documents, immigration papers. And then my wife's like, Charlie, and there is like my family tree down to my name. This woman was my mother's second cousin who had stayed in the town. And I said to her, we went to this farm, like nine miles south. Is that where the swing is? She's like, oh, yeah, just down to the bog, near the Slaney River. And she said, yeah, there was like nine kids in that family, some from the family of nine. And she said from that one family, because they bought four tickets to America and five

tickets to Australia and sent the kids off. And from that one family, six thousand descendants. And so she has people coming through all the time and like knocking on the door and like getting so that's why she's collated all this kind of information on the family. It was like my own personal episode of Who Do You Think You Are? That's amazing. She's become like the official family historian. Well, it's actually, no, it was a distant cousin of mine is a priest in South America and he was infirmed and so he spent his time while he was in the hospice,

researching the family history and pulling all this documentation and then sent it to her as the last resident in Kilgarvin in case Sweeney was rocking up it was amazing. The family those six thousand should chip in and buy the house after she goes you know keep it as a little museum. I don't think there is a house anymore. I think yeah I think they sold I think they sold the land to get the kids out of there. You fair enough. Anyway, back to the jokes. Um, how's that man in your bum?

He's sleeping. Oh, that story brought this shit out of him. No, no, no. I mean, I, cause my dad recently did all this as well. Right. Yeah. And we're like old time cowboys. Oh really?

Yeah. Which is kind of cool. Yeah, that is cool. Like we came down around the first sort of colon colonies through like through the north and we're in Arkansas for a while and yeah, just settled down in Texas and stayed there. Yeah. We have like mainly like cow ranch ranchers and linesmen and I got a little bit of Chickasaw Native American there from a great, great, great, great grandmother.

And you can make fun of lots of different races because you get a pass. I don't know. What's your hot take on the Chickasaw Nation? I think that they were probably genocide. Yeah. That's what you open your warm up with. I like the tics or genocide and no one gives a shit here in Australia. And now the bouts.

No, fucking so that's yeah, it's it's fascinating, but I. Have to stop talking at some point. Sure. Surely, right? Yep. You would imagine. We're talking at some point. Surely, right? Yep. You would imagine. We're talking today? Yeah. Yeah.

I used to do the bans because I did warm up, audience warm up for the bounce. Oh yeah. So you work with Spud? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that would have been- And he was, I think he was the reason why I kept the job. Right. Because I really, this was early on when I moved to Melbourne and he was just like, he liked my impressions.

Oh, that's great. One time and he was like, yeah, I just got, yeah, and he would always be like very nice to me. He's lovely. Yeah, it was a lovely. Oh, that's so nice. He loves mud. He was, he started with the first person that was like, oh, actually not all AFL players are fucking the stupidest c***s alive. You know what I mean? He was good on that show too.

I remember Will and I sitting down to watch the bounce one night and we started off making fun of it. Oh, like these footballers trying to be comedians. But then the dynamic between Jason Spud, I'm like, this actually works really well. Yeah. Like, has you got one person who's willing to be the butt of every joke and will just roll with it? I thought he's actually a pretty gifted comedian. Yeah. He's got what he does. He's very selfless in that sort of way.

Yeah. Yeah. And Gazy, I guess, has moved into that role. I do love Gazy. Yeah, he's so likeable. Yeah. And I think he plays the sort of- he plays it up like he's sillier than he probably is. Yeah, absolutely. It's just a role you got to play. But he's alsoier than he probably is. Yeah, absolutely. It's just a role you got to play. But he's also such a smiley guy.

Yeah, he's just lovely. Mm. And he was there at the same time as well. Yeah. And he was pretty good. Oh, yeah, he was sick. Who was the asshole? None.

I love you. It was really interesting. How often did you hear the phrase, I'll turn it up? Turn it up. A lot. Turn it up and flog. Turn it up, you flog. My favourite segment on that, do they still do it?

The- I thought it was such a funny sketch I did. I don't have Fox tail so I couldn't tell. Oh, the, the, the, the, Kam Mooney's numerology or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's just like, they just find stupid money number patterns and it'd be like, whoa. And they do it like it's all mystical and stuff, but it'd be like, there's a freeze frame of the screen and the scores add up to the number on the back of the player who's on the screen at the time. Whoa, what does it mean? It's like it's a one note joke, but I love how they just commit it all into it.

Yeah. That show is made like on- Shoestring. A shoestring. Yeah. And just by this really interesting- And how big's to crowd like. It's quite small yeah it was the best because I'm I.

I will be the first to tell you that I am a terrible warm up and I was but it was on it was impossible to kind of fuck up this crowd yeah because they were there to see the bounce and they loved football and they put on the football before the show. So how did you open your own? Hey guys, I got some bad news. I just found out my dog's got cancer. I'm not really in the mood. I did well with the bounce, but I'm bad at it. Yeah, I find it very difficult to like, hype people up. I'm just like, I like, I'm good at talking shit and asking questions like, if there was a little man in my ass that was going to crawl out there while I was at a few steak and tell you the time and date of your death.

And you can't do that with a family crowd. No. Yeah. But that'd be a great warm-up. I mean, is Bounce, that is a family show. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

So. I think so. There are kids in the audience. Who would not know who any of those old blokes were, though. Like, no kids here. They'd know him as entertainers, which is the funniest thing. Yeah. Chief, he says, what a great TV host he is. I wonder how he got the job.

Do you remember very early on in Chief's TV career when he's back on the footy show, when he tied Sam Newman up to that, having a lat pull down competition, and he tied Sam to the thing and shaved his head? Oh, that brings it back. That's fine. Talk about things you can't do on TV today. Jason Dunso is a very enigmatic, powerful figure. I've heard a great story about him that I'll tell you off here.

Okay. Have you got your answer in, Ben? Oh, what was the question? It's now Monday.