Who Shat On The Floor At My Wedding? And Other Crimes - S3 E20 Boob Bandit - Part One

Episode Date: March 12, 2026

In 2022, six elite survivalists were clinging to life in the Peruvian Amazon after 39 days of extreme survival.Starving and desperate, one of them shot down a huge turkey-like bird. They put it in a pot to simmer through the night, and fell asleep dreaming of the meal that would carry them to the finish line. But by morning, their shelter had transformed from a place of trust and family… into a crime scene.The pot, once filled with hope, was now missing one and a half breasts.The jungle might keep your secrets. But we don’t. We’re coming for you Boob Bandit…The finale of Boob Bandit is out on 26th March.Support us on Patreon http://patreon.com/whoshatontheflooratmyweddingFollow us on Instagram @whoshatontheflooratmywedding for case evidence and behind-the-scenesSound design by @avaud.io Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

911, what's your emergency? I have a robbery to report. One and a half poultry breasts were stolen from my stew pot overnight. Oh, you've got the wrong department, sir. This is the police. We deal with real crimes. Hang on, I'll transfer you to someone who can help. Karen.

Okay, I've got it. Get the phone. Karen, pick up the phone. Now. Give me one second. I'm just finishing my push gets. Honestly, Karen. Hi there, it's assistant to the detective, Karen White.

house here. How can I help? So I was trying to survive in the Amazon rainforest for 40 days and one of my teammates stole the breast of the bird that I had hunted. Oh, okay, I'm going to have to patch you through to the lead detective for this kind of case. Hold the line. All right, here we go. This is Detective Lauren Kilby speaking. How may I help you? In 2022, a group of late survivalists were dropped into the depths of the Peruvian Amazon for a TV show. The rules were simple. Survived for 40 or 60 days

in one of the most unforgiving environments on earth. They could only take three tools with them, a knife, a pot and a fire starter. And the worst part of it all, in my opinion, they were completely naked.

Stripped of comfort, protection and dignity. This is an experience that is designed to break you. People change out in the They built shelters, battled a huge amount of dangerous animals and insects. Jaguars walking around, you've got things trying to eat you, you've got insects everywhere, scorpions, like you're on high alert constantly. Faced near starvation. Slowly dying, starving to death, nothing but skin and bones, pulling my own teeth out.

Really falling apart physically. When you're in Robinson Caruso situation and foods out there, people do strange things. One by one, the jungle claimed its victories. Majority of the contestants tapped out. By day 39, only six remained. Matt, Stephen, was, Dave, Amber and E.J. Known to each other not as competitors, but as family. Guys, I love more than anything in the world.

I know my survival brothers and sisters will have my back. We want to take care of each other. On the brink of starvation. Matt shot down a huge, turkey-like bird just before sunset. I killed one of these birds. I put them in the pot. A massive one.

These birds, I was super excited about because my partners were like withering away out there because they didn't have enough food. They slow cooked it overnight, ready to feast in the morning. Everything's been good. But when morning came...

And then... Then it wasn't. Then something changed. And somewhere in the night, things got taken. It's the morning. time. We're all stoked. We're bringing the pod out. And I can smell that bird. It was smelling so good. And then I remember Matt grabbing the top of the neck, pulling it up, and then literally not seeing what's

supposed to be there. Complete cartilage showing from the center and like no meat. And I'm looking at Matt. And then E.J. looks at me. And I'm looking at Waws. And then they're kind of looking at me, like in the same kind of bewilderment. I remember verbatimabbitant. I remember verbatim asking, Matt, do they usually, do they usually look like that? Like, where are the breasts? There should be more meat than this, right? There is nothing in here. Well, no, there has to be. Where is the breast meat? Well, it didn't fall out. It's got to be in there, right? Have a dig around, see if it's in the bottom there somewhere. There's nothing here. Where is it? Let me take a look. There's no meat here. Let me see. By God, that's going on here.

All right, fess up. I need to ask you this. question. Did you steal any breasts from the horned screamer that was boiling inside the stew pot that night? I did not steal any breastmate or any meat at all. No, I did not. I did not steal or take any breast meat that was not handed to me. Did steal that bird from nature, but I did not steal the meat from the pot. There's no way I'm going to disrespect anybody, and I'm no thief. Cross my heart on my mother. I would never do that. The wilderness is brutal, but it's predictable and it's brutality.

This was different. When you have very little and you have something taken from you, it's like everything you have. And that's like a family. Like you don't take food. That's like stealing. This is like where loyalty and friendship and family, this is where it is. When food just disappears, that's like instead of infidelity, it's in futility. So it's basically like you're cheating on your significant other.

This is the case of the boob bandit. To kick off this investigation, we're speaking to Matt. The survivalist who reported this case into us. Key witness and suspect, Matt Wright. Primitive survival rating, 9.8. Number of survival challenges, 10. Number of tapouts, one. Personality traits.

Generous, known for sharing food with others. He loves to help and bring up others. Special skill, primitive hunting. Matt is a freakishly good hunter. Matt, you called our detective hotline earlier today. Can you tell us what happened? I had killed what's called a horn screamer. Put it in the pot.

A what? It's a bird that looks like a size of a turkey. A cumungo, also known as a horned screamer. A huge bird found in South America. This particular bird has daggers on its wings that it fights you with. Oh God. It just frightens me. It's a crazy bird.

So one particular partner had a good friend of mine, Stephen. He's super excited that I killed one of these birds. I put him in the pot. This is like a turkey cooking in the pot. He's like so excited to eat this turkey. And as we cook it all night long, we let us simmer. And the stew pot really tenderized, turned into like a fantastic, you know, stew. It's aroma right now of just like an absolute incredible meal of like turkey.

stew deliciousness. I remember seeing that. I had all like the fat on the top and it just looked delicious. We opened it up and we pull this bird out and it has no breast meat. So he looks at me

completely astonished because it went in with breast meat. It now has no breast meat. The only way it loses breast meat is if a person within this team stole the breast meat in the night and secretly ate it. So then the mystery starts

being whispered about because there's six of us and one of us ate the breast meat in the night so obviously I'm off the list because why would I eat the breast out of a bird when I was really hoping to share

so boom I'm taking off the list right because they know I share they know I wouldn't like take food in the night Stephen has been super hungry he's skinny you can see the man's spinal cord I think is Stephen the one that lost a tooth in one challenge he's losing his teeth he's not good with lack of food yet

his bones are showing Oh, God. The man needs food so you think maybe he would have eaten the breast in the night, but then you're like, hold on now, he wouldn't have complained about there being no breast if he was the one that ate the breast, so boom, that's off the list. Somebody needed it. Now, we all need it because we're essentially out hungry, naked people living out in the wild. So we all could use a little extra bird breast meat.

But who would be sneaky enough to reach in the pot? Yeah, that's really lairy. Everyone started to accuse anyone else of possibly having it, Or there was a funny conspiracy of that bird had no breast meat. It just was born without breasts. Yeah, that's what I thought when you first said it, but I know nothing about birds. That would be a weird thing to happen, because how would it fly?

Because the only way a bird actually flies is actually those breast muscles. They're the actual wing muscles on a bird of the wing. It's actual, like, what you know is like the wing meat, that only holds a wing out. So it needs boobs to fly. Good summary, Lauren. Was was sitting there and he's like in the night I heard somebody fumbling with the pot Who was it?

And he's like, well I can hear the pot lid But I was tired and I didn't feel like turning over Suspect 1 was All right was That sounds so dodgy I think it was the bird was got That got the breast taken out He felt I don't know

That that was a prize for him in that survival situation So maybe he felt like he was owed more than others Suspect 2, Dave. Dave's like, well, I looked into the pot to see how it was cooking. Oh, interesting, right? Suspect 3, E.J. EJ's like, well, I saw Dave up by the pot and we're like, hmm, or did you just want to throw blame his way because you ate some breast to me?

Suspect 4. Amber. And then there's Amber who's super, super quiet on the situation. But Amber, you can actually see part. shortly through her body when the sun shines. She's so skinny right now. Oh, jealous. She should have been the one to do it, like 100%. Suspect 5.

Stephen calls himself the king, which the king sounds like a king would take as king's portion. Suspect 6. Matt. Would I take an extra portion? No, because I usually end up eating the portion of some of these things like other people don't necessarily want. So I eat the heart and the head. Dave said he never ate anything out of the pot.

Was said, you know, he didn't eat anything out of the pot. E.J. said no. Stephen, for example, it still bothers him. He still wonders what he could have been capable of doing if he would have had a few extra hundred calories of breast meat. The mystery was never solved. Who ate the tuts? Who ate the Amazonian tits?

Who ate the Amazonian tits? I mean, we haven't taken on a breast case yet, Lauren. This feels perfect for us. And both boobs were taken? One and a half. Not a full breast meat. Oh, was there like bite marks or was it like nicely like cut? It was actually definitely pulled away with like a finger.

No cut marks. So I now need to share a screenshot from the show because I really need to map out from your memory where everyone was around the pot in question, just going into my boob bandit evidence folder. Let's see if this works. And probably this is my biggest fear of I share something really inappropriate. Porn. Yeah, entire screen window. You're like, that's not what I meant to share.

Whoopsie. There's breasts still, but it's not the breasts we're looking for. That was a different boob. The most important thing for us as detectives is to understand who spent the night in your shelter, the night that the boob was stolen. So in our shelter, the entire time actually was Dave. was and also EJ. When that moment happened, I think it might have been Amber and Stephen.

Their shelter was not all the way done. They were spending most of their time, at least, in our shelter. Everyone, you think everyone from those six were in your shelter at some point that night. Oh, definitely. Definitely. Okay. Our shelter was essentially, let's call it like the living room, family room or whatever you would call that room in a house.

It was essentially like the place to go and sit. We asked Matt exactly where the stew pot was, the night the crime was committed, and where everyone was sleeping in relation to it. It was being cooked inside the shelter. Dave and Waz were on each side of the pot in their beds. The pot was being cooked kind of in between Dave and Waz. Then I was towards the end of the shelter, which was myself and EJ. Matt goes on to tell us that he inspected the camera footage after the incident occurred.

The angle on that did not show the pot. It showed the outside of our shelter. It showed that everybody was at the shelter. And it did show that most of the night we were all there. It showed a couple people leave the shelter. I think if I recall, I think it showed like Amber go out and tinkle. I think it showed Dave going outside the shelter. I think at even one point, it may have shown Dave washing his hands and his face at one point in the night.

Why would you wash your face in the night? if you hadn't had a greasy chicken broth? How would you be so messy to get it all over your face? I don't know. I mean, the washing face situation is pretty incriminating. I think even E.J. was seen kind of outside the shelter, like, stretching and moving, which is, is he moving because he has a full stomach? Or is he just stretching?

Like, hmm. It would have been boiling hot. So how would you have done that subtly? So the pot was sort of between those two, they would sort of let it boil, you'd have to keep an eye on it in the night. So I think if I recall all of us at some point probably handled the pot by either taking it off the fire

or putting it on the fire or adding water to it. But it would be hot. So whoever would have grabbed it would have had fingers that can go into the crucible of hell. So who would have had burned fingers? Would have been a question. Yeah, we need to test the toughness of everyone's fingers.

That's the next strategy. We'll just make them put their hands in boiling water as part of our investigation. In front of us, yeah. Yeah. Everybody has to grab like a hard bowl egg. Yeah. Maybe that person didn't even eat it.

Maybe that person was just a grabber of the breast meat or someone else. Lauren, I would be your breast grabber if you needed me to be. That's how much I love you. I'd do that for you. I would require you to get me the breast and bring it to me and feed it to me. We start talking about how Matt entered this challenge. And we find out that he actually joined halfway through. Essentially, I got a call that there's multiple people in the Amazon that have been dropping like fly.

If they'd give me a little heads up, it would have been nice. But instead, I was literally out on the boat taking alligator hunters here in Florida. And I got a call and they're like, hey, can you go to the Amazon tomorrow? With no time notice, I had to head to the Amazon to help out, help the people that are out there survive as long as possible. So with no delay, I left my house, went all the way to the Peruvian Amazon. And that is where I arrived in the Amazon on day 21. With 40 days left to go, there was only six people left in this challenge. And I was paired with Dave and Waz to see if I can keep them to get to day 40.

So that's quite unique for the show, isn't it? That you were pinned dropped in halfway through the exercise. It was definitely unique for the show. They sent myself. They sent E.J. Matt confirms that E.J. and himself arrived on day 21, meaning they would have been very well fed at this point. We can't rule Matt and EJ out, but it does put more suspicion on the hungriest suspects,

was Amber Dave and Stephen. What state were was and Davin? They were both looking kind of like, kind of like stranded, marooned prisoners. They had been beat down, they had been tore up. Their spirits were slightly broken, but they had been doing it. They'd been trying to figure it out.

It was very interesting for me to step in there because here they are naked, 20 days. They're hungry. They're getting skinny. They're all bug-bitten. I am now white as heck, clean. and so it was a strange encounter at first, but they were welcoming. And it felt to me like I just got stranded on the same island

that two people have been seemingly dying in. I was like, we've got to turn this around. We've got to figure out how to make this survival a bit better. Watching the show at the moment you arrive, basically in the minds of Wads and Dave, it was a bit like a waiter from a high-end restaurant arriving saying, can I take your order? That's kind of how they saw you arriving.

They were like, yeah, I have one board. Can we get a couple of herons? It's the vibe that I got. They were like the meal tickets in town. Yeah. I think they definitely believed that food was around the corner. It was a funny moment because it was Dave himself that was one day into it. I had not gotten anything yet because I just got there.

And he came to, he's like, he's like, I knew this place. You can't survive in this place. This place sucks. He's like, we're not going to eat anything. I was like, I've been here for one day. Let's give it some time here. I could tell he anticipated food would just be flying out of me like a rainbow. I think it took about two and a half days sometime into the night that the first thing I actually killed in the whole Amazon was a field mouse about yet big in our shelter.

And I shot it with an arrow and it launched it through the shelter outside into the bushes. And it was Dave himself, went out there and used a camera's light to try to find it. And he spent about 10 minutes out there looking for this little mouse because he was that hungry. He was like, I'm not letting this mouse go to waste. I'm going to find it. And then he finds it and skins it up and cooks it up. But do you think they might have resented you a little bit because you were kind of sent there to save them, to save the day? It was definitely an eggshell moment because you walk into someone who's doing some kind of big task in life and you're saying, hey, your bosses essentially didn't believe that you could make it on your own.

So here I am to help you. I think at first they were like, why would we need help? Why are you here? But then I think they realized that we're all part of the same kind of a journey. and I didn't feel like there was that resentment. Sharing the journey was important to everyone, but especially Dave. Because his first two teammates dropped out from illness

right at the start of the challenge, and he was left to survive on his own for multiple days. I kind of felt for him. I was like, do you know what? He was abandoned by all of his mates, was only joined him on day 10. I was like, I get it. He had to build a shelter.

He had to get firewood. But once Matt rocked up, things were looking up for Dave the rest of the grope. Slightly more food than usual was rolling in. He was pretty well fed, I think, Dave. At this point, you know, it's quite a bit of those birds, as well as these little brush trail of tree rats that I was shooting.

There's a few of those in there. The dock had been built, so the dock was producing more fish. He was definitely more fed than any other part of the challenge at this point. Would you say he was, like, satisfied from a food perspective? I would say that while you're surviving, it's pretty darn hard. to be satisfied. You're always pretty hungry. Oddly enough, if you're starving, you miss food less. You know, you get used to being hungry. But if you're eating food, your digestive system starts working and you actually get hungrier. So while we're eating a lot on there, you get to crave

food more than you almost were when you were actually in starvation mode. Oh, that's an interesting part of this puzzle, isn't it? Because I would have assumed it's the ones that were starving that would probably be the ones the most likely to pilfer, but actually this is the opposite. Last couple of questions, the key ones, is we just want to know from all of the survival exercises you've done with these five others.

Who else has shown clear precedent of sticky fingers? The only one that has shown sticky fingers has been our boy Dave. But then again, the most mysterious, the person that all of us know essentially the least amount of how to read is was. So was definitely has not shown necessarily sticky fingers, but he is mysterious enough that he wouldn't get caught. Matt, would you want this amazing unqualified detective team to take on this

case for you? Yeah, of course. Otherwise, there's just no way to solve this kind of a mystery. We had very little resources. We had nothing to write down anything with. We have no pen and paper, no clothes. We are ill-equipped here. We definitely need your assistance. You had other priorities, I think, like surviving. This case is officially open. Time is ticking.

The 24-hour speed-solving countdown to crack this case starts now. Countdown initiated. 24 hours left on the clock. 24 hours, also known as 1-2. And this is what a horn screamer looks like. I don't like the look of that bird. It looks like it could get quite aggressive in kind of a tech. So the main thing I got from that is that it's really interesting what happens when people are starving versus when they are actually eating not like big meals but more regularly.

So it's the people that were starving and less suspicious technically. because they actually just disconnect and their digestive system is not kicked in, so they don't have the cravings like those who have actually eaten more recently do. So that just makes the motives stronger for the people that were in Matt's camp. I don't think we can rule someone out based on the fact that they were starving, so they were therefore less hungry. Because think about it, Karen, like a few hours ago, actually 20 minutes ago, I was starving.

Like this is not a survival situation. We can make it into one. It could become one. And I ran downstairs and got those nuts and we just ate a whole thing of nuts. You're not good with luck of food. Exactly. So I think it depends on the person. It depends on the person.

I don't think we can rule someone out or say that the case is based on someone who had eaten recently. Actually, we should go to Vondel Park, both of us, because you're here in Amsterdam recording this. And one of us should be allowed snacks and the other shouldn't. And then we'll expose ourselves to a turkey breast. and we'll see who's most likely going to eat it. I don't want you and me to be in a situation together where we expose any kind of breast.

Okay, fine. So I just thought that was interesting. I think it's interesting. I'm not saying it's not interesting. I'm just saying we can't base the case on that alone. But we need to use that as part of our interrogation strategy. We need to verify how valuable that horn screamer would be to each of the people in a survival situation and in a normal situation.

Yeah. The first question is to everyone, because we need to have a story. strategy that is the same across all five suspects so that we can have something to compare. It's like a scientific experiment, this interrogation strategy. So first of all, it's like you're in a survival situation. You haven't eaten for 20 days. You have an option to eat wild boar. Option A.

Do they have boar in the Amazon? I don't bloody know. We need the boob desirating. The BDR. Should we ask about the bobs of the boar and the bobs of the eel in the book? No. Bores don't have boobs. They're bloke unless they have.

I don't know. I don't know. Man boobs. Boar boobs. Oh, they're all men. Boers as a man anyway. Poor is a man. That should be the name of the episode.

Initiate interrogation strategy. We need to find out how deeply they sleep. Who is your biggest suspect and why? Did you see Dave washing his face? And we also need to gauge how much they value honesty and integrity. We need to do a personality test on them. Okay, should we get an online personality test? No, we don't have time for that with...

D-J. Yeah, but we need it. Okay, we can make one up. We need to see how they perform in a team setting. I think ethics are at the heart of this crime. That's why I think we do need a question that touches on ethics. Sleepwalking, we need to find out if they sleepwalk. Ask them what their death row meal is.

And then we can find out if there's any poultry included in that. That's a survival situation. Because you're about to die. How are we going to solve this case? How are you going to solve the case? I think if we genuinely wanted to solve this, we would ask production I know

but then we'll get sewed and they don't talk about the fact that there was something stolen in the night in the show never because honestly they are covering it up there's no way they're not covering it up are you just doing personal admin that's just personal admin

are you sensitive to heat are your hands and fingers sensitive to heat how do we test that we need them to go into the kitchen and put a hot tap on their fingers and turn it up slowly and then we see when they remove it. How long could you hold a hot water bottle without having to put it down? Yeah, get a mug of boiling water and then how long can you keep your fingers on it for?

Yeah. We're scorching. We're remotely scorching people's hands. That's not ethical. How can we test their burn hand sensitivity rating? I think we just have to do it with a question, Lauren, rather than... But that's so boring. Why don't we just say...

We're going to get... Do you have sensitive hands? Yeah, don't give up. I don't know why you're feeling that you have to torture them practically when every other question is the same. We're not going to get a 200 grand plane of bore, slow cooks, Amazon Bird and Flame Greel. We're just going to ask them the question. That's how interviews tend to go. They're not going to go, oh, great, yeah, thanks for the question, Karen.

Last time I was holding a thin porcelain teacup, I could only hold it for seven and a half seconds. Write that down in your little document over there. We just be nice to each other. I love these. Why can't we just be friends? You're getting so fired off. But I don't get the strategy. Sorry, you're just getting really stressed because I'm suggesting it might not be a good idea to burn everyone that we'll interview. No, no, they'll take their hands off before it burns.

Yeah, but I mean, we're going to slightly scold them. I'm really sorry, I know you don't want to let this go. I just think we need to be a little bit more flexible given where we don't know where these people are going to be. Right, well, let's do it hypothetically and let's see how that goes. I think your attitude needs a real rethink. What do they all have that's available to them that's hot? I think boiling water. He's pulling over on the side of the road.

Our first one. How hot is a car engine? Find out what car he has. It'll be a truck. How hot is a truck engine? 88 to 104 degrees Celsius. This is the last thing we're doing if we're going to try and get him to touch. It's the bonnet of the car.

The bonnet won't be hot. We're not getting to open the bonnet and touch the fucking... I am literally firmly put. I'm going to... It's only 88 degrees. Don't make me call Helen. Okay, cancel that. Buddy hell, Lauren.

Worries me sometimes when I'm the one that has to say no. Can you not eat? We're recording. Stop sneaking. In a crunchy almond. I think it was the mention of Helen. I was like, oh, snack. Yeah.

Okay, so next steps. We've got everything. We do need to speak to the horn screamer expert, just to understand the extent of the breast to see if these hungry people's memory actually are exaggerating how much meat on these birds' boobs. How big are the breasts? Yep, how big are the boobs?

Activating expert database. Professional experts at the ready. Contacting Amazonian bird expert Pepe Rojas. My name is Pepe Rojas. I'm originally from Lima, Peru. I spent since 1991, more or less, I started working in the Amazon rainforest. It's a place that I love like home. I've been going back and forth for all.

over 30 years. I'm here happy to clarify some answers related to heart screamers. They sound more like a donkey than a bird. And I can mimic and vocalization how this sounds. He's plays something like, whoo-woo-woo-woo-who-who-who-who-who-who. I've never heard a donkey sound like that. I'm just going to call that. The mystery is, who-who-who-woo. Who stole the breasts or breasts of the camungo? Exactly. Capamongos don't have a lot of breasts in the meats. They are very poor flyers.

They're large birds are huge. So for a bird of that size, without those adaptations, would be quite hard to be airborne. So beginning to the fact that they have very little breast meat, it's something to have on mine. Pepe immediately launches in to potential suspects. If it was overnight, I don't think a monkey species would have done that.

There's only one species of natural monkeys, the night monkeys, but I would find really hard to believe this monkeys venture at night to open a pot and take this meat from the breast. What could have done that is perhaps an opossum. A possum? Yeah. Opossums are, there are good numbers of opossums in the Amazon. But do they have hands?

De possums have hands. They don't have the exterior of a monkey. So just trying to look at the perspective of a potential wildlife, a robber. Animal culprit. Always got to consider

the animal kingdom as being a potential suspect in this crime, but the pot was inside the shelter. Over a fire. It was cooking over a fire and it was boiling hot. People were inside the shack as well. Yes.

Yes, people were inside the, yeah. than the shelter as well. Please don't tell me it could still be a monkey because I don't care and I don't want to have to go back to the zone. No, I don't. No one wants us to go into the animal kingdom. People inside, that rules for me a lot of the wildlife other than the homo sapiens inside.

And homo sapiens. There are six homo sapiens. Are you familiar with how bra sizes work? I think I have a good idea. We're talking birds, right? If you're saying like an e-cup, which is really, that's a really big. feminine breast. So if we're saying e-cup is the equivalent of a turkey on Christmas day,

like a really big turkey that is, you know, everyone's... There wouldn't be a day, there would be a D, I think. A turkey would be a D-Cap. A massive family, like, turkey, a huge one that's going to serve a family of 10. Okay, double D. That's double D. That's a turkey breast. What cup size would a kumongo be compared to that? I was going to use some other analogy. Fair enough. Since my specific knowledge on sizes and numbers is not pretty keen. Yeah.

So I was going to say something like perhaps it would be like a turkey with a breast of a chicken just to give you an idea. Oh. So a significant difference. So this is because Camungos don't need to be strong flyers. So size B. So maybe size B approximately. Probably. That's not a part of my expertise.

But yeah. How bad do you? think this crime is that if one of those six survivalists, when they're all starving, there's a woman in there who really had lost so much weight and zero body fat on her. Same with another guy who had not eaten for, I think, a good 10 days and was literally just skin and bone. Like, how bad a crime do you think this is? It's pretty bad. You asked me, after being in expeditions and different situations, if I am in a situation like that and I am okay, I will be hungry and everything else. But there are people they are in that shape, I will consider to prioritize it for them.

And I will be last, to be honest with you, because it is a matter of ethics. It's a matter of trying to help those that are in more of a dire situation than you are. But I can speak for everybody. That's me. That's who I am. It's time to interrogate our next suspect. Everyone in this group of six has agreed to be interrogated by us, except for one person. Dave, he is ghosting us. Suspect, E.J. Snyder, primitive survival rating 9.1. Number of survival challenges, seven, number of tapouts, zero. Personality traits, mental fortitude, a team player, special skill, ability to make fire.

In your own words, could you explain why you think we're talking to you today? Well, it's pretty simple. I was one of the mugs inside the hut And there was only four of us in there sleeping Hopefully I'm not a suspect You never know I'm a freakishly large man You know I'm the first fingers they'll point at probably Because I'm the bigger old guy

Sometimes I'm known to not really care much About what people have to say And I go my own thing But I think it was definitely somebody else And maybe I have some clues I don't know Just to answer your earlier question Yes, you are a suspect because everyone is a suspect. Me?

Yes. Hey, come on now. That way. I was the one sleeping closest to the door. I was the furthest away from the plot. Let's get that right out there right now. So could you please explain the crime and give your witness statement about what happened? So you know, Matt, he's a really good hunter.

We're both ex-military guys. We both teach survival for a living. We both hunt and fish. Matt, all the hard work he fed me. And I came in there pretty beat up the first day. I was so grateful that Matt got this Gomongabird. So there's no way I'm going to disrespect anybody. And I'm no thief.

I'm a military man that lives by a coat. The Ranger Creed. Since 1988, I would never embarrass that creed by being a dirty, what we call on the Rangers, a chow thief. A dirty, rotten, no good chow thief. Yo, the pirates should make you walk the plank for that. So I'm not walking the plank, and I'm no chow thief. I'm a freakishly large man, but you know what I got that the others never had?

His mental fortitude. Yeah, I slept in the shelter. I was closest to the door. Probably looks like I'd be the one with the best chance of taking that little breast and running out the shelter easy. No one would even sit. And Matt slept across me, but the thing about Matt, that people don't know. He snores. He snores loud. When he goes out after doing all his hunting, he's tired. He needs his rest.

Then there was Dave in the back. He was the closest one to the pie. I sleep with one eye open all the time because I'm an old soldier. And I'm always looking out for the enemy. Even though I might not say much sometimes, it might even look like my eyes are closed. You might think I'm sleeping. My other senses were working. And I can smell that bird. As hungry as I was, I was smelling so good. And we all had shifts, and we'd stir that thing. And then all of a sudden, I'd seen a little hand. A little hand.

And then there was Dave. He got little hands. They're kind of feminine. A feminine hand. I did see those hands going over there from time to time. That little pilfer. I was sitting there. And I seen them.

I don't blame him if it was him because he's very lean. He's a young man. He's got to get his strength up. And boy, does he work. And in my opinion, if the little guys, the young men, and I've seen this, this has happened before now. I've seen it in the Louisiana swamps with all those other young guys, all washboard, stomachs, you know. The younger men, they're not gen Xers. They didn't drink from garden hoses.

is they didn't eat mud pies or flip over handlebars and smash their face and your mom would come out see you crying she'd say hey shut up get back on that bike step you're crying get out of here if he would have just asked and said guys I need a little more wait so when you say you saw his hand go what can you go into just talking slowly exactly what you saw well there I was sitting there and it's heard something stirring and I heard the pot rattling And that little hand was in there again. But this time he wasn't fast like a little rat. A little bit slower.

When he grabbed it, I saw more of the hand, and I kind of caught just a half a glimpse of just a portion of the face. It's hard to make out. I could have swore it was Dave. Can't be 100% sure because it was just moonlight and a little flick of the flames, but he was moving slower. That breast did move, but it wasn't by these hands. And then I could hear it.

Oh, something back there was like a little rat eating some cheese. Cleaning his paw. And then I got up and said, hey, get this fire going. And I looked over and the only other one was awake was Dave. And what Dave said to me was, oh, you startled me. Oh, I'm sorry, Dave, didn't mean to start to you. Why don't you go on back to sleep? I'll tend the fire now.

And all I did was guard the pot the rest of the night. I wanted to make sure everyone had some food in the morning, especially myself. I was expected to kind of be the leader of the group, and what does a leader do for his troops? You make sure they can get fed and they're taking care of. So I made sure there was going to be no pot filthering going on, and I put that lid back on that pot nice. And I kept that fire going, and I just watched. You saw feminine hands, so you think it could have been Dave because he has feminine hands, but does that mean it could also have been Amber, who may also have feminine hands?

Oh, I forgot about her being in there. She wasn't sleeping in there? Oh, that's right. She used to come visit us at night. You know what? You make a good point there now that I kind of start recollecting. Amber. She used to always hang out in between Matt.

and Dave. She used to sit right over in the middle between them two. That's what I remember. Okay, so this is actually really important from what Lauren just said, because if Amber slept in between Matt and Dave, then the feminine hands were probably at the right angle. You could have confused the two. Yeah, I could say that. You got a point there and, you know, and Stephen was near me, but Stephen's kind of a small guy too. Now I'm really starting to doubt myself. We need to inspect everyone's hands We need to look at everyone's hands And inspect them to see who has feminine hands

So everyone took turns to like tend to the pot To make sure there was enough water in it and stir it Did you discuss how that would work Or was it just anyone that woke up Would just make sure it was maintained Everyone was supposed to take shifts But it always wound up Whoever woke up

I never pulled more than my share But I would always stay awake Because you know We got Jaguars out there And you never know when they're going to sneak in They could smell that commoom looking cooking all night. And I know it wasn't a jaguar paw that got in there. It was a weasels. When you saw the actual bird in the pot in the daylight in the morning, what did it look like?

That bird was mangled up like it had been in a fight. No real chunks anywhere. And that could have been from the stewing that it broke down, but it was all over the place. There was one piece of larger meat that stayed together and it was a piece of the bird's breast. How many breasts in total were taken? One in a pinch. That's what I'm going to say. One and a pinch. If I or you were trying to take little bits of a breast from a boiling, hot, simmering

pot, would it not be really hot to handle? Oh, it would be extremely hot to handle. And here's another thing. The round rim of that can cooker pot, it's like based off an old, milk jug. My mitt is exactly 19 inches around at the fist. You know, look at that mitt. I couldn't get my hand in it. I want to submit this as an exhibit of some letter or number that only a hand that was rather small or feminine would easily fit into this pot and take it out without anyone else. Who opened the pot with the lid in the morning? Do you remember who did that?

If I remember right, it was Matt, because Matt loves to feed everyone. Look, everyone, this is what I've got for you. He's very proud of that. And he always would hand out pieces for everyone. And that morning, I remember he honored Dave. My God, he gave Dave the breast that morning. Dave got the second breast. Yes.

Wow, that's a double whammy. E.J. We need you to go back home, get a piece of paper, and trace around your hands with a bit of paper. And I wouldn't see a photo of it taken with a ruler next to the width and also the length of your hand. So we need to have everyone's hand measurements just to do a few tests. Could you email me that, please?

Yes. Did you mention to anyone that you saw a hand go into the pot? I never made mention to anyone. Kept it to myself. Because if I want to said something, that would have caused a division amongst the six of us. And that's not what we're about out there. It was my duty to keep the group together.

So I made a calculated leadership decision. Perhaps it's better. Others don't know about what happens in the middle of the night. So you didn't tell them the full story that the hand was feminine. You just said you saw that something but you couldn't make out her was. You didn't tell them the rest. I just held them. I heard the pot rattling.

Never said anything about a hand. Do they know about it now? I haven't spoken about that in four years to anyone but you. This is an investigation, and we took a note to tell the truth, the whole truth, nothing but the truth. You've been quite clear about this, but I just need to get the statement. Who is your biggest suspect in this case, EG? After this little exercise here in this little investigation, I'm a little bit fuzzy now, a little bit confused in my whole brain. Maybe I was too hungry and maybe a little bit.

fuzzy. Dave would be my first suspect, but now Amber's kind of got her hand in the cookie jar, too. And I know their hands are both so small they could fit in that pot easily together. Maybe the two of them were conspiring, one would grab it, and they would both eat it. Now I'm doubting myself. I mean, my eyes, you know, they're older, and I was hungry and tired. Maybe they weren't seeing so good in the bad life, but it had to come from that corner. I would stake my life on it. Wow, that was, I don't think I've ever experienced a witness statement quite like that. I felt like I was on trial.

I don't know. I don't know how I feel. I think all my feelings have left me, but I enjoyed it in a way. Yeah, I kind of, in a sick way. Yeah, in a sick way, I kind of liked being shouted at. What a character, what an absolute character. I want to be more confrontational with Amber. Because I felt like old mate didn't really let us interrogate him.

No. He just shouted at us. Yeah. It was a good tactic, actually. He begged us. The thing is, can we trust, I think we can trust these people in what they're saying. So I think EJ, genuinely everyone calls him the father of this show. He was the OG legend that helped really create the show.

And he was the first one that kind of led the path and got so many other people interested in learning how to be a survivalist. So I think he's got such a proud ownership of his role in this show that he would never cross any integrity. boundary. I think he's just, it's a very important role to him and he's one of these very proud of to show how it should be done and that you can maintain your morals and integrity, even in these really, really dire situations where you're starving. So I just think he just seems very legit and he was the furthest away from the pot. E.J. saw someone in the night grabbing something out of the pot and that person had feminine hands. And Amber and Dave were beside each other, according to E.J., Yeah, which means they, you know, either of them could have done it.

Yeah, it matches the missing breast location and the orientation of the beds to the pot. Oh my God, I can't wait to speak to Amber. We need to test her hand size immediately. Amber is a potential suspect because, A, according to one witness statement, she was very close to the pot. Her placement and her hand size could make her the culprit of this crime. And also Matt and EJ both said that it was both Amber and Dave and Stephen, to be honest, who were the skinniest up for a lot and in desperate need of eating and they had the highest motive.

It's really leading towards Amber or Dave. It's like genuinely could be either. The glove fits. Initiate Amber interrogation strategy. Good cop. Build. Trust. Trust. Bad cop maximisation.

We need to ask Amber if she would be interested in doing a real lie detector test. Yes. How do we build trust? Talk about surviving. Why don't we say I've also got feminine hands? You don't have feminine hands? I don't think I have feminine hands. No, I don't either.

Why don't you leave the building rapport bit up to me? Absolutely not. You don't know enough about her. She's doing this at 7.30 in the morning, her time. Good. I can't wait to watch you flirt with her. Oh no. You didn't flirt with EJs.

Why are you only flirting with Amber? I haven't done it yet. Don't judge me for my future actions. One witness statement places you directly beside the pot. Show me your hands. Which boob was missing. She's got very honest eyes. Oh, you're already flirting with her before she's even joined.

Yeah, she's got kind eyes. Tell her there. Right there, down. I'm not telling this. I'm not telling a stranger they've got kind eyes. Why? That's so fucking creepy. I've just got a response from Amber.

What'd she say? She said, yes. We all know who did it. This is going to be hilarious. Suspect Amber Hargrove. Primitive survival rating 8.8. Number of survival challenges, 7. Number of tapouts, 4.

Personality traits, resilient and resourceful. Special skill, fishing. Hi, my name is Amber and I'm an outdoor survivalist. Welcome, Amber. We are unqualified detectives taking on a very important crime that happened to you. In your own words, could you sum up the crime that you think we're investigating? The crime that I think that you guys are investigating is going to be the moment when we are missing meat out of a pot. And not just any meat, a very large breast meat of a bird in the Amazon.

Can I just say your hands? Can you just show me your hands? Would you describe your hands as feminine hands? I don't know. They're kind of rough. But yeah. We need to know where everyone slept in the shelter. That specific night? That specific night. So we actually had two shelters. Matt, Oz and Dave, they had the larger A-frame where we would cook all of the food and we would sit there during the day because it was the largest shelter.

Stephen and I had our own A-frame two-story home that was about 30 feet away near the water. And Stephen and I would stay in ours. But in the middle of the night, I would occasionally wake up and I would go and sit by the other fire because it was quite light. larger and I would just head into it. I would put firewood on their fire. I'd put firewood on mine just to kind of keep my mind going. And there was a particular night that I was walking towards the shelter and it was very dark. And I walk up and there is a certain person who is standing outside and just chomping away with their mouth closed and like kind of trying to hide it and putting his back towards me. And I was like, oh my gosh, hey, what are you doing out so late? And that person was like,

didn't really talk right away. And I didn't know what he was doing. He just looked weird. All I could see was the fire, like, glow on his back. And then he finally turned around. He goes, oh, I was just out here making sure the fire was good. And I was like, oh, okay. And then I didn't really pay any mind to it. So, like, walk inside. And then the pot lid was off.

Could you tell us who that person was? Coming up next on Boo Bandit. We've got a massive interrogation coming up. We need to do this properly again. Do you think he's going to speak with us? If he says no, we can say he's guilty. and if he says yes, we can probably also say he's guilty. As I'm falling asleep, I'm sort of listening to what's happening.

The noises just kept going on for a good five minutes, ten minutes. And it shouldn't take that long, but there's lots of movement around that pot. I hear the lid go back on and I can hear some chewing sounds. This is the highest stakes, Bard Cop interrogation you've ever done. I might come across quite stern. I just want you to know that that is my job, and it would be unfair to both you, me and Karen. if I went easy on you.

So why do you think was saw you there for five to ten minutes? It seems like quite a long time if it only takes a couple of minutes to fill up the water. This is putting Lauren in a territory I'm incredibly uncomfortable with. This could go many, many ways. I don't know how this is going to go. No, I don't know either. Oh, God. It's going to be confronting what we're about to do.