WHOA That's Good Podcast - How to Celebrate Through Jealousy

Episode Date: October 6, 2021

Sadie speaks with DawnCheré Wilkerson about fighting jealousy with celebration and the importance of knowing your worth. They also get into things to look for when dating, leading yourself first, and the importance of community. God never wastes a waiting season and his ultimate calling on your life is much more simple than you might think. - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Yes, you energy, energy for everything. Katsuban are now to learn more. What's up, WoodedSkin fam. Welcome back to the WoodedSkin podcast. Today, we have a very special guest, a sweet friend of mine. And probably someone that most of you look up to, so I'm excited to just have her on the podcast and get to talk because we have been through some similar situations lately. We both just had beautiful baby

girls who I hope are best friends one day and so without further ado welcome to the podcast Don Sherry Wilkerson. Sadie I'm so glad to be with you. Thanks for having me on. Yeah we got two baby girls. We're growing our family. I know, we're girl moms. How fun is that? I never thought, I don't know. I have five brothers.

I didn't process having a girl. So, I had two boys. Now I've got a girl and it's the whole new world. Everything is pink right now. The whole new world. Tell everyone your kids names because I think it is just the cutest. It's like almost hard to say, but it's the cutest thing ever.

Thank you. It's really confusing, but to back it up a little bit, I come from a pretty confusing name line. In my family, there's six kids. My mom gave birth to six kids. Our last name was Doron and our siblings names were Destiny, Don Sheree, Diny Des, David D and Dakota. So I decided with the W's for Wilkerson to just keep it going. So my first baby boy, his name is Wyatt Wesley Wilkerson and he's three years old and then I have a one year old about to be two. His name is Wild Wesley Wilkerson and He is Wild and then this baby girl her name is Whalen

Wesley Wilkerson and Nameed after none other than I don't know another way and so whaling Jeannings it is Wow, I love that. I was gonna ask where did Whalen come from but that's awesome I love their names, and I love how it's W.W.W. Me and Christian were like they should start like a W.W.W. It's W-W-W me and Christian were like they should start like a W-W-W dot W-W-W family like blog or something like that's just like Dustin like W-W

It's literally destined for greatness. I love it. I think it's so sweet. They are the cutest. I have to say Christians are already planning honey's future and he literally showed Honey pictures of Wyatt and Wild and was like, so these boys are pretty cute. We got a pretty blue-eezy Anna-Kid, like fallen in love. That's right. That's right. How's she doing? She's doing she's doing so great. She is fully recovered from her sickness and she is wild. You would think we name her wild. She's crazy. She is so much fun. The nurse has called her wild woman.

So she's just awesome in doing great. I can't wait for our girls. To me, it's gonna be so fun. Well, obviously we can talk about so many things, but first we have to go with the question that I ask. everyone in the world Let's give hot cast. What is the best piece of advice that you have ever been given? I love this question. I think there's a lot of pieces of advice that my parents are giving me over the years I could say it's like the best because I just they're my heroes But I think my mom has always been really big on starting your day with God's word Not reading the news,

making first things first so that his promises are just the first thing that's good and start your day. I don't always get it right, but it's something that I'm always going for because I think it just sets the tone for your day in a completely different way. And I do want the first thing on my heart and in my mind when I open up my eyes to be the faithfulness of God's promises and his word always does that because like reframes your whole day. Yes, that's so good. I love that. Shelly Giglio always says the same thing and it's so cool because so many people look up to you and look up to Shelly and you know, I think people will say like, oh, I wish I could be more like her.

I wish it could be more like that person, but you both start with the word. And I know that that probably has to do with how you guys are in real life, how you keep a joyful spirit or how you keep your head on straight in a crazy world. And so that's really cool to hear. I've been trying and challenging myself to that this morning. I woke up and I immediately wanted to get it on Instagram. And like was like nope and I scrolled over to the Bible app I was like no I need to you know so go on God's promises because I do actually I need the Bible app to like automatically open for me maybe they need to go to anything else they need to set that I mean

there's so many things that like you can program You need a program like as soon as I wake up and I press slide It needs to just be on the Bible app But no it really does make a difference in your day, so I love that Okay, so I want to ask you so many people look up to you and rich Christian and I are some of those people Honestly, I remember when Christian and I first met it was just funny because he did not get star-struck or anything. He was always just like, really cool about everything, but the one thing he did say, he was like,

Sadie, like, you know Rich Wilkerson Jr. I was like, yeah, he's like, he's the coolest guy ever. And so Christian loves y'all, always has. And for good reason, y'all are just a great example. But how did y'all meet? Take us back to the start. We think he always the coolest guys ever y'all in the coolest. I just love any time I get to spend with you and celebrating your wedding was

up for every memory. It was the best. It was the two of you together. I mean you're already creating such a special legacy. Thank you. But the we met, let's see the question is how did we meet? But the we met, let's see, the question is how did we meet? Yeah, take us back. We met 20 years ago, girlfriend. I can't even say that. I mean, it makes me, I can't believe how the time has passed. But almost 20 years ago, in January, it'll be 20 years. Wow.

And we met Nashville, Tennessee. I was singing then in Nashville. I grew up in Louisiana. That's where all my family still lives. And I was going back and forth, 16 years old, 17 years old, from Louisiana to Nashville. And singing and working on music. And his brother was on the same label that I was on.

And his brother was in town that we, Rich came into visit his brother was on the same label that I was on. And his brother was in town that we, Rich came into visit his brother for one day and we hung out, we were at a concert and then we went to subway and we went thrifting a goodwill together. And what a great start. I'm sorry. Yeah.

I didn't think I would ever see him again. And he actually got my number from a friend and just started calling me. And I'll never forget, well, first of all, I'll never forget coming home from the studio. It was in the day when you didn't take yourself on with you every day, so I left it in my bedroom and when I came home from the studio in Nashville the next night after Richard left town, I had like 30 plus missed calls from this number. Wow, like this guy is crazy, but what is happening with

his older brother was being a pump and saw that he had called me and actually picked up his phone and just older brother to a tea. Oh, that's hilarious. Over and over again. And so he looked crazy when I called me, only called me one time. But I'll never forget that first combo because even at 17 years old, like Jesus and just radically transformed his life. And it just his Jesus story just like poured out of his heart. We ended up talking like two or three hours that first night. And he was just telling me about how month before on the other side of the world, he was with his dad at a conference and God just wrecked him and really revealed to him like, stop like doing

your own thing, partying, like hanging out with people that are not speaking the life over you. Like you have a call on your life and he felt that call and he was like 12 years old, but really walked away from it. And him being so in love with Jesus was probably one of the most attractive things ever. And we were long distance for a year and a half, then we dated for a total of like four and a half years, and then got here.

That's amazing. That's a cool, I'd never heard that story before. It's actually really similar to Christian and I. He had kind of been living a more wild life, and then we were long distance, and I was living in Asheville. And it was just, he did the same thing He didn't call me 30 times, although that would be something he would actually do because if I don't answer he will keep calling

But he was so intentional about calling me when he we would have like hour hours long of conversations And so it just is so cool. Okay, so in the world that we live in today It is like dating is so complicated and I think dating maybe has always been complicated, but it's so complicated now. And one major thing that I think is the problem is people just are so hesitant to commit. And so for you and Rich, like, you know, going back 20 years, what did that look like to commit to one another? And how do you, you know, what advice would you give to people nowadays who are dating to just like commit when you know it's someone that is worth committing to? Yeah I think commitment is something that really is

missing from our generation. I think commitment to the call of God our life commitment to pursue the right person to walk alongside commitment to the house of God like commitment is lacking kind of in every facet. But I think when it comes to dating specifically, I just think that yes, we all go through seasons where we're asking God, is this your will? We put it on the altar before you like, do you want me to be with this person? God, is this a right person? I don't have to know if I'm going to marry him today, but like, do I continue in this direction? You know, and I think that it's important for both people to be willing to do that.

That said, you know, surrendering the trust journey to God and not having all the answers, all that said, I do think it's really important to know your value. I think it's really important to know that whoever you're with, they should want to be with you. And they should be committed. And you may not be in a place where you may only be three months in, six months in, and you shouldn't have the expectations they know they want to marry you. You're just getting to know each other.

I think it takes, you know, a while to get to know somebody. So everybody's a little bit different. And while you can't expect that kind of commitment immediately always, I think that you should expect and know your value that the person that is with you should be with you. They should be committed in their words. They should be committed in their loyalty and their faithfulness to you. Not like doing a million other things, you know, like it's like, no, if we're going to be committed to each other, we're really going to walk this out and honestly and

transparency and I think that makes a big difference. I think culture says otherwise that you don't have to take relationships seriously that you don't have to be committed, but I think there's power and commitment. I think it's blessing and commitment that if I'm here, I put my full weight down. And if I need to move on and if we need to go our separate ways in dating, I'm going to be honest with you. I'm not going to, you know, I'm going to be honest so that we can both walk forward and strengthen. I think that honesty brings a lot of strength to your commitment. Yeah, that's so good. Oh, I love it. I think, you know, that's brings a lot of strength to your commitment. Yeah, that's so good. Oh, I love it.

I think that's probably a part of the problem too, is that people are so quick to go someone. And so there's this fear of even getting close, because you're like, well, what if they just leave? What if they ditch? And I think commitment, I love how you make commitment so much broader than just dating. It's like, we need to live committed lifestyle.

It's like committed to the Lord, committed to our church, committed to the call it got has on our life, committed to if we're going to be in a relationship. So I love that. It's more of like a mindset than just a little cute phrase that we're trying to do while we're dating. It's actually like a really powerful thing. And we all go through tough times.

And commitment is really only seen when you go through tough times. Yeah. And really only seen when you go through tough times. Yeah. And so I love the way that Levi Lusco said, that he says, choose somebody to marry that you want to suffer with. Because we all go through difficult seasons. And so oftentimes when work gets harder,

when relationships get harder, when serving in church gets hard, we just jump ship and we're out of here, but really, you know, it's in the struggle when who you are in Christ and what you know about the God that you served is really revealed when you're in the challenge. That's when your commitment is really seen. Yeah, that's so good. I love it. I remember Krishna, we're reading a mingling of souls by Matt Chandler and he says, you're gonna argue with someone.

So do you want it to be the person you're dating? You know, it was like, he was like, and you always gonna argue with someone and I was like, Lauren is who I'm gonna argue with. And so true. And we looked at each other and we were like, yeah, I can't argue with you. I choose you. You know, you're gonna go through it with anyone. So you gotta choose who you're gonna commit to.

I love one thing about you and Rich's relationship that I think is really powerful that you can see is that you are so supportive of each other. Like, you'll see you go in and do in your thing and you'll see him go in and do in his thing and you all aren't always together but you always feel together. Like, you'll see Rich here and you there

but like, your relationship is so strong. How do you get to the point where you're cheering your spouse on, or even your friends on and not envying them for them getting to do the things that they're called to do? Oh, celebration is so key to really life-giving relationships. If you can't celebrate others, I don't think you'll ever have the depth of relationship

that got intended for you to walk in. And I't think you'll ever have the depth of relationship that got intended for you to walk in. And I love that you hit on that because celebrating friendships and celebrating your spouse. Both of those are key. I think relationship is one of the greatest joys of life. Yeah. God didn't place us on this earth by ourselves. But I think because of things like social media or even just our own sinful nature, like we can start comparing, we can start looking at what other people have and maybe they got what we wanted a little bit before we got it. Or maybe they're further down the road, whatever that means, then we are. And we can start to be sparse with our words, feeling like for us to validate the season they're in somehow

diminishes the season that we are ourselves in. But I have learned that celebration, there's freedom in celebration, that if you feel even like a tanger of jealousy, if you feel even a bit of comparison, that's the moment to step in and to encourage them to celebrate them and share that junk off of you. Because that stuff, it limits your life. It doesn't limit them. It makes you small. When we live in jealousy, when we live even feeling like we shouldn't speak words of life

over others, we really live in a smaller world than God intended us to live in. Because when you get to celebrate people, man man and make sure life so much bigger because all the said in someone else's win becomes your win. Yes. So there's a lot more things to party and celebrate and to thank God for and let that celebration like roll up and thanks and honor to God. And so when it comes specifically to my relationship with Rich, yeah, we've been through a lot of seasons. We've had tons of challenges. Like you said, like any relationship

does. But one thing we're really committed to is trusting one another and winning God's best for each other. And I want to leave an marriage that is constantly giving me room to grow into who God's called me to be. And I feel a real conviction in my heart to constantly give rich space to grow into who God's called him to be. We haven't finished growing until we're in heaven. We're going to still be growing in sometimes in relationships. You want people to change, but the minute they actually do change, you kind of get upset. You can't agree with me now. I've been saying that all along. Well, why don't we actually celebrate it and thank God that it's an answer prayer. We got to make room for people to grow and to change

and that creates like a real flourishing atmosphere for all of us. That's the kind of relationship I want to be in. Yeah, come on, that's so good. I love that. I remember, I guess it was about two years ago, we were doing, you know what, everybody picks a word for the year. And everyone was like picking these great words and they were like really like challenging words. And I was like praying by my word

and I really felt like God, kind of laid on my heart to choose the word celebrate. And so I was like, okay, yeah, celebrate's gonna be my word. I didn't really know what that, the context of that meant, but I just chose it. And everyone was kind of laughing at me because they were like, celebrate. Like that, that doesn't really sound like a very,

like, spiritual word. But I realized throughout the year that it really actually challenged me in my faith so much because you're right. When you don't celebrate people at your world, really, like, you're small, but when you celebrate people, like when you celebrate people as if everybody, you know, respond to the call of God is a win

for the kingdom, so it's a win for you. Like that really does change your mindset and change the way you live. It makes you so much more joyful, so much more happy for people. Have so much better friendships, so much better relationships. And it really is a challenge I think everyone should take to celebrate people greater. And I think

some people think, well, is it, you know, am I being really genuine if I say to her? I'm so happy for you and I'm a little jealous. I think it's not, I think it is genuine. I think it's telling your heart to rise above. I think it's, you know, you know, telling your heart to align with the truth of God's word that you're going to cheer on your sister. I don't think it's disingenuine. I think it's calling yourself to be better. You know, I think the enemy would love you to feel like a hypocrite for doing the right thing when in reality, you're just responding to God. You're responding to conviction. I love your, what you were saying about like growing into all that God has called you to be and how like you

and Ridge are still growing, which I think is so cool, because people would look at you and Rich and be like, how are y'all still growing? You all have a church, and you are doing all these amazing things. But I do think people think that. I think people get a little bit never-minded and think that, oh, if that person is doing this, and they've made it.

And I hear, specifically, college students talk about a lot. I'm so panicked, what has God had for me? What is my next year? You're gonna look at and I always just tell him like just rest and like what is he doing in you right now And he's just gonna continue to do it just keep saying yes because if you try to envision the future like you're not even Going to be able to hit what he's gonna do and so like what advice you get to people who are like so freaking out about the future And are almost limiting God to as if God only has like one specific thing for them and they have to like somehow magically just find it. You are speaking the language because I feel so passionate about this.

I think that especially 20-somethings, they give up on the God orchestrated once in all of history path that was created before their life began because they think it's got to look like that person's path, like that person's path. And so suddenly, they start to look at their path and they don't value it anymore. They don't value the job that God gave them. So they don't show up with joy or maybe they walk away from it to go get something else when God was crafting something beautiful and unique within them at that job. They don't value serving because it's not

in the right position that they see themselves down the road serving. The little I learned is that in my 20s I've served in so many different capacities and so many of them didn't make sense or align with what I was passionate about or what I was good at. But God is shaping something in me in every season, whether it's a position that I chose, whether it's something that I wanted to be placed in my hand

or whether it's something that I never wanted to be placed in my hand, but God himself put it there. And I think that God's just looking for people to be faithful. You know, we get so wrapped up in like, what are our gifts? What am I called to do? Well, if you're 20, if you're 19, and you're listening, God's called you to be faithful. God's called you not to give up and to trust His timeline. Don't call things small. You don't know what the small things are. You don't know what the big things are.

I think in the kingdom of heaven, you know, the things that we value here on the earth, it's often upside down. So I think the little things that we call little here, actually the big things, the attitude of the Lord and our spirit, little here, actually the big things, the attitude, the love and our spirit, you know, like, when we show up on time for things that God's interested to us, when we carry the joy of the Lord, when we honor people around us,

when we complete what we start, when we make a commitment and we see it through. I think all of these things are things that sometimes we can make excuses for because oh it doesn't align without on passion about it. It's not really my life calling, but our life calling is to be faithful to love to you, to love people, and God will work out the rest of our life. So I say take the pressure off yourself. I remember having those nights where tears would stream down my face and I would feel like, oh, what am I called to do? What I've learned on my journey is,

I'm called to this moment to stew and to be faithful, to be present and grounded, and to lean into the voice of the Holy Spirit. And Jesus himself said, don't worry about tomorrow. So I gotta stay here. Yes, come on, that's so good. So I got to stay here. Yes. Come on. That's so good.

So many people need to rewind and listen to that past five minutes over again. Like, we're called to be faithful. We're called to love God and love people. And the beauty of that is there's no anxiety in that. You show up and say, yes. Like, there's this phrase now that I've been learning about and it's called purpose anxiety and it's like our new phrase for our generation where it's like the idea of your purpose gives you so much anxiety

because you either don't know what it is you either don't know how to fulfill it or whatever that is that looks like and that's like actually a very common thing like a very a lot of like secular articles have been coming out about purpose anxiety and how to deal with it and I'm like man that is so crazy that the enemy would just make us get so freaked out about our purpose that we have anxiety over it and don't feel like we can live up to it when our purpose and our call is actually simple like be faithful love God love people and the spirit will lead you, you know, into each day and know what it comes in. Had a conversation with a friend of their day, and she's just an incredible person.

She's in college. She just did something really successful in the midst of college. And the day after the successful moment, I was having a conversation, so how did go everything? And she started crying. And she was like, I'm just so freaked out about like, you know, what I'm gonna do next. Like, I don't know what's next.

And everyone keeps asking me what's next. And I was like, friend, you don't have to know what's next. Like, you just did this amazing thing. And you're in college, just keep studying, keep doing your thing. Like, keep showing up. And God will lead you, you know? Like, it'll come.

And I told her I was like, if somebody would have asked me what's next three years ago, I could have tried to answer, but I would have never guessed. First of all, I was just meeting Christian. I would have never thought, you know, we would have stepped into getting married and have a daughter. I would never thought I would go on to write more books

or do any of that, but it just came about daily yeses and walking and trusting the Lord. And so I love what you said. I love that. I think that is going to just influence so many people. One thing you mentioned is that, you know, doing the things well, like showing up on time, honoring people. And one thing I know about Vood Church is y'all honor people so well. I'll never forget going to Vood and I was like the culture here is amazing.

Like, I am not a city person but I was like, shoot, should I move to Miami? Like, it was just like so awesome. I was like, this place is amazing. Like, you honor people well, y'all had dance parties in your courtyard going. You are like everyone like hung out at the houses later. Like, it was just such a fun culture and I know you enriched lead that. And, you know, there is something to say about the leader setting the tone of the culture. It was just such a fun culture and I know you enrich lead that. And there is something to say about the leader setting the tone of the culture.

And I think so many people get into this place of like, I don't have good friends, we don't have a good culture, we don't have a good community. How would you encourage someone to maybe build that if they don't have that right now? Yeah, I would say be the friend that you want. You know, I would say start where you are and decide to be a part of community. There are so many reasons not to be a part of community because you get hurt,

because it takes investment, it takes time. There is a sacrifice for you to have genuine relationship because it takes time, it takes your emotional investment, it takes a lot of your life to have thriving relationships, but it's worth it. So I would say just start where you are, like a lot of people look and they go, oh, how do you create a healthy culture? It starts by leading yourself. How do you create a healthy culture? It starts by leading yourself. It's a beautiful friend that you want to be. And I think a lot of times we keep our eyes on,

oh, I want to be their friend, but they're not responding to me the way that I would like for them to be. They're not available for the coffee or they're too busy for this. And I'd say, there's so many people around you. It's good. And you are someone's answer to prayer. Wow. Start to reach out.

Start to invite people. Start to create a relationship that's centered around Jesus. And you're going to have friends that know Jesus. And then you're going to have friends that have never had a personal relationship with Jesus. And God's placed you in their life to be a light. You know, your life really is a letter. You know, the world may never pick up the Bible, but they can read your life just like a letter.

And that letter can testify of the joy of God, of his peace when the world is so lacking in peace. Like you said, purpose, anxiety, everybody's feeling it. And so you can say like, Stuart, Stuart, yourself is hard to lead others when you haven't first decided to lead yourself. Because let me tell you, I'll just be the first to say, it's way harder to lead yourself than it is to lead others. That is the start to keep your teammates to yourself. If you make a commitment to yourself keep it. If you're pursuing more of a relationship with Jesus, really do it. We get caught up in all the things we want to do, but more than anything, I want to know Jesus. And as we know Jesus, we know who Jesus loves, Jesus loves people. So as we see Jesus, he's gonna lead us to people

that desperately need him and need you, whoever's listening or watching, they need you in their life because you're gonna be that Jesus that they need. I personally have been trying to live that out myself, trying to lead myself because you're so right. I encourage everyone to be a good sister and a friend and I literally have an app that builds community

for sisterhood and yet sometimes that is the hardest thing for me. I just moved back to Louisiana in the last year and we had honey and things have been crazy and we've been living in a pandemic. And I kind of just realized, I'm like, you know what, I have all my friends in Franklin that I love so much and that's like where my community is

and I'm a family here, but I haven't really tried to make friendship. And like, I really want that, I really desire that. And so I was like, okay. And so I started texting people and over the past year I've gotten to become really good with friends with this one girl. Well, it'll be funny if she listens to this. She'll be like, I'm kind of exposing myself,

but I do think this is good for people to hear because I think sometimes people look at me and they would assume I have friends because I have followers, but that's not the same thing. And just because you have a following or just because you have online people, you still need your people locally, the friend you can call and they'll pick up the phone or go to the coffee shop with. So, yeah, she's gonna laugh when she hears this because I've, you know, been her friend. Well, she leads like one of the, you know, big life groups here. And I've kind of just been like waiting for her to invite me and Christian to join. But we've been friends for like a year and it has just never happened.

And I'm like, man, like if I could just get in that life group like I think I could really build a community like that would just be so great. So for the past year I've just watched like this community group just like thrive and grow and I've just been like waiting for the invite. So finally this week I was like hey friend look is your life group like open to the public like can we encourage Christian join or is it like exclusive? She's like, oh my gosh, like yes, you're all enjoying. She's like, people join every week.

I would love you to join. She's like, oh, honestly, just didn't know if you would want to come. And I was like, yes, like me and Christian need that. Like we need community here. That like, you know, just friends are age that we can hang with that have kids and whatnot and She was just absolutely shocked that I have been wanting to come

She didn't even like think about that and it was just so easy and so simple and here I am. I've waited a year of my life to get an invite when all I had to do is ask and so I love your advice and sometimes You do have to lead yourself and like don't just like wait for the invite. Sometimes like you have to be the one to ask you have to be the one to invite them into your life or to your your group. You start the group whatever that looks like and so I just had a lesson in that because that just happened this week and that has been like a year in the making and so I love that you said that. It's actually so good though. Like that story that you just saw,

it's gonna help so many people. Because I know all of us, like we have that tendency to sit on the wall and then when we go for it, we're like surprised that there's a wide open door. But I think that your story is so encouraging because we all find ourselves doing that. And that year you waited, it won't be wasted because somebody else looks straight now, but I think that your story is so encouraging because we all find ourselves doing that. And that year you waited, it won't be wasted

because somebody else is right now watching, like they're gonna take the step this week. And I love how honestly you share your journey, Sadie, like you're anointed for it and your story holds power and brings freedom to so many people that you and Christian together, like God, God just has beautiful things in front of you, but thank you for walking so vulnerably and openly

because we all can relate. And we all need friendships, rich and I lead a small group. And we call them Cruz here at Voo, which is the name of our church, Voo Mayany. But we lead a small group and our small group, it ministers the my heart. And Richard, I often say like, we don't just lead a community, we participate in the community that we lead. Because also all of us desperately need relationship.

And I've watched people sell themselves a lie, you know, in the new mom season or in the newlymom season or in the newly-went season or in the just going to college season or in getting a new job season or in the, I just moved season that says, I don't have time for community right now because the enemy wants to isolate us because he knows that there is so much waiting for us in community. We're sharpened, we're encouraged. Our tank is filled up as we gather with others who speak faith and share gratitude and share needs that we can pray for others,

not just ourselves, it's beautiful. And so yeah, I can totally relate with that story you told. Good, thanks for sharing that. I, yeah, I think, you know, it's one of those things, even in the past year, that I didn't have that community group or that friend, no group necessarily that I've had in the past. It was really a sweet year because I feel like me and Christian created a bond that we have never experienced before and we've become so close. And so I do think, you know, for the person struggling to find that community,

if it's not there yet, this time is not wasted, you know, you can look up and see your life right now. I even remember whenever I was in high school and really struggling finding solid friendships, it was in the midst of like dancing with the stars and just a really crazy time in my life, that's whenever I got so close to my family.

And like that time when my family has created a foundation that, you know, for the rest of my life, that's whenever I got so close to my family. And like that time when my family has created a foundation that you know for the rest of my life, I know I can call my brother, my mom, and they're going to be there for me. And so don't look at it as waste of time and really invest in the people in your life right now before you know you have that community. Because you do have a community in a sense, it might not be what you're looking for, what you know you put on paper, but those people matter and those people are the ones that love you and they're walking with you and so invest in them just as you will when you have that group. So I love it. You said that's so cool to hear from you all as well. I want to ask you about something that I know you all walk through that you've been open about and honestly

friends that I've had that I've walked through through this I have always pointed them to your page just as a resource because you trust in God so beautifully and I know it was a hard hard season to walk through but I know you and Rich walked through infertility and it was really hard for you all to get pregnant and now you have three beautiful babies who you've shared their names while in Whalen with us and it's just a miracle. It's just a miracle story. www.miracle. But I want to hear, I want to hear about the the journey in a sense. You don't have to share details, but I just want some encouragement for people who are walking through that or any season of just waiting and believing for something that's not there yet. How did you trust God and see God through the journey of waiting and through the miracle and all the things? Absolutely. In fertility is a big part of my story and I think when it comes to finding our purpose,

a lot of times the reason why we can't just like make a straight beeline towards what God has for us is because he hasn't revealed it yet. And a lot of times our purpose is revealed not just in the winds, but in the struggles of our life. I think that the broken areas of our life are the ones that he uses the most. And none of us want to hear that when we're starting out on our faith journey, that it's the broken areas of our life.

But infertility has been a big part of my faith journey when I was 25. My doctor, I had gone to the doctor because I wanted to start a family, which and I had been married for four years. This is a good time where 25 would have been married for several years now. And I'll never forget my doctor handing me a card

of an infertility specialist and saying, hey, your blood test came back a regular. You need to make an appointment and you're gonna need help conceiving. And that started an eight year journey of infertility. And when we talk about community and the story that you just shared about waiting a year to reach out, the reason why that story so connects

with me is because I've been there and you're absolutely right, it's not a wasted season because God does so much in us on from the inside out. And for me, I was so uncomfortable with the idea that I was having trouble, having a child. I'm one of my mom gave birth to six kids. There's seven kids in my family. And so it's like, what? I'm not going to have any trouble. My mom never had trouble. Are you

kidding me? You have the wrong person. Like, There's no way. I didn't even tell my parents for the first year. And my parents are like my best friends. And I just felt like, you know what? I'll be able to get through this by myself. I can handle it. I went to the doctor's appointment and sat down, had all the tests run, and did all this stuff. And about a year in, realized, OK, do you see?

This isn't just something that you can pick up the pieces and heal and walk forward without anybody knowing that it was ever a struggle. And maybe that's not God's plan after all, you know. I think when we face hardship, sometimes it's like, well, let me fix it before anybody even knows that there was a problem. And that's how I approached it. But then I came to a point a year and we're I shared it with my family. And for several years, they were my community. And it was a precious time, just like you said that last year has been precious for you. It was a precious time for me for a different reason, because I was going through a dark valley. And I was leaning on my family and they were supporting me and we

were celebrating the weight. If you're in a waiting season, you know, to be walking through infertility, you can be waiting for God to reveal what color you need to go to or what direction you need to take in your life purpose. Like we were talking, you can be waiting for a loved one to be healed or for your own body to be healed or or for whatever it is that you are in that waiting room of life. I just want to encourage you. God never waste a waiting season. Yup. And it's been in the waiting season of my life that he's revealed who he is and who I am in him. And he's close to us when we're brokenhearted.

You know, I can remember clearly moments throughout that eight year journey where his promises were more real to me and my brokenness may ever work and my moments where I was celebrating or where I was winning. Those whispers from heaven, those smiles from God that let you know, I'm in this. I'm in the doctor's room with you. I am with you at 3 o'clock in the morning

and tears stream down your face. I'm with you as while other people are getting the thing that you've waited for years and years and years for. I'm with you. And Jesus being with you and the waiting is it really is the treasure. It really is. What what we all seek more than even the thing that we're waiting on. It's the presence of God. Like, not only Jesus is our purpose. And I think him revealing himself and his love in such a real tender way. It made me feel safe and secure. Like it made me feel like free to celebrate others. It gave me the confidence to get out of my head and to be able to show up to the baby showers

and celebrate others and grab every baby that I saw and hold them close. That was at night's strength. That was a strength of God because he says that in our weakest moments, that's when his strength will respond us. In your weakest moment, the power of God rests on you like never before. He said in the name of grace is sufficient for you. I'm speaking over you. If you're in a week season whoever's listening or watching, I'm speaking it over you today. He said in the mean my grace is sufficient for you from that power is made perfect in weakness. The scripture goes on to say, therefore all boast, all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ power my rest on me.

And the love of God is I drew close to God in that season. It made me feel so safe and secure that I finally got to a point where I was able to boast. It took me six years to be honest. That's how long that inner conversation with God was before I could ever share publicly. I was I was speaking all over the world that people didn't know this inner struggle that I was walking through. My close friends did and six years in I said okay I'm posting about my weakness. I don't have the miracle yet but the miracle truly isn't God is with me and that's the miracle I'm going to celebrate even more than holding a baby in the arms one day

I know that's going to come to pass but he's faithful and to hear and now Wow, it's faithfulness is what I get to celebrate and it unlocks something in the heart of freedom When we get out of our heads and start focusing on those around us, we go, I'm not waiting for that season. There's beauty and fruitfulness and purpose right here in the way. Come on. Wow. Oh my gosh. I feel like I just went to church and also just sit down with the sweetest friend and gotten courage. Thank you so much for sharing that with us. I think that revelation, that the miracle and the treasure is Jesus in the waiting.

It's something that's actually, you know, I've never put that to words like that. And so thank you for even encouraging me with that today on a personal level. That's so good. And I have to say everyone listening can hold me accountable to this because I guess we've been doing this for three years now. And I've to say, everyone listening can hold me accountable to this because I guess we've been doing this

for three years now. And I've interviewed so many of my friends and everyone is amazing. But I have never said this before. I think this is my very favorite interview ever just because I am so thankful for the wisdom and the truth that you just spoke. I think so many people are going to be so impacted.

I feel like you just hit, you know, touched on so many things that people are walking through every single day and there's no doubt that this is going to be, you know, a light in the midst of someone's darkness, a truth over the voices of lies that they've been hearing. And so thank you for just pointing us the truth into Jesus and loving people so well. DC DCU are a gift and I'm so thankful to be your friend and that you said yes. I'm gonna be your friend. Thank you.

The biggest honor. This is awesome. I love having conversations with you. You share the light of Jesus in a one-to-his-three way and I'm cheering you on every step of the way. Keep going. We're all up and celebrating and there's so much more ahead. I can't wait to hold honey. And I can't wait to go over together next time.

I know, Whalen and Honey are going to be the cutest friends. I can't wait. So get back to Louisiana and let's hang out. Love you, friends. Love you, I love you very much. Bye!